Fin vs History - History Fan TV | Prehistoric Man (Part 2)

Episode Date: October 23, 2025

When do humans start farming and why does Graham Hancock think people 60,000 years ago could fly?    The show for people who like history but don't care what actually happened.   For weekly bonus episodes, ad-free listening and early access to series, become a Truther and sign up to the Patreon  ⁠patreon.com/fintaylor  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You know what's better than the one big thing? Two big things. Exactly. The new iPhone 17 Pro on TELUS' five-year rate plan price lock. Yep, it's the most powerful iPhone ever, plus more peace of mind with your bill over five years. This is big. Get the new iPhone 17 Pro at TELUS.com slash iPhone 17 Pro on select plans. Conditions and exclusions apply.

Where's your playlist taking you? Down the highway, to the mountains, or just into daydream mode while you're stuck in traffic. With over 4,000 hotels worldwide, Best Western is there to help you make the most of your getaway. Wherever that is, because the only thing better than a great playlist is a great trip. Life's the trip. Make the most of it at Best Western. Book direct and save at bestwestern.com. Welcome back to Finverse History. I'm joined by Horatio Gould.

This is part two of our prehistoric man series. Our thump through... A romp through millions of years. Thud. Of prehistoric history. Yeah. And we've done that now. Thank God.

And we're now up to... Where are we up to? What, about 10? bc the mesolithic period right so this is where

it's all starting to come into focus a bit it's all it's literally like focusing a camera right it's all blurring yeah

different humans are there and you're like what's that that one's got big head and then it just they're starting to like

Homo sapiens are the only humans left people are starting to sit cross-legged maybe potentially

that's like that will take like a million years to get there but what he's in this isn't this is an

evolved that's like that's million years the only differences like that. But what's the evolutionary success of this compared to that? I guess hiding a small hog? I think it's like, yeah. And women are like, I think it's multi. Women are like, oh, what's behind that? I think it also, it's, micropenus, psych! Yeah, I think it's also, you're, it's harder to get up, so you sit around this fire more, you talk more, socialize.

Wednesday, first micro penis, Charlie, first known micropinus, because that's got to be a, um, uh, Charlie, that's just caveman porn. Yeah. Yeah. Oogibut stuff. Oog, Ugarbutt stuff. I've never considered caveman porn but there's something to it considered it I've not considered it

no consider the caveman porn micro penis when's the first micropinus ever there's no way to know we can't know there's so much we don't know

there's so much we don't know the more we do this podcast but Ben Hancock would go we do know yeah an advanced micropinus civilization I've got it right here

yeah right here mate Graham Hancock Cocky Right here man Oh he's cocky about it He's cocky about me We need to get to Graham Hancock

But let's just Let's just first Place this for the people Joining We are in the Mesolithic period Yeah Which is not My wife's not part

My wife's cycle Yeah This is The Ice Age has ended Yeah And with it I think goes Pangir Which you should talk about

So what is Panjia Panjia For people like me Who for whom the world is very ethnically distinct Pangea is a terrifying concept that we share land

It's liberalism gone mad This is woke nonsense, Pangea It's all countries stick together This is the future liberals want Yeah Every country's in one Africa is just smashed into the UK

It's all just This is the logical If you don't stop the boats This is what will happen Africa will just crash into the UK So I mean what I mean, where on earth is Britain in that? So it's before racism.

This is pre-racism. Well, I guess so. But this is more like localism, I guess. In that Australia is attached to, what am I looking at there? Where's the UK? Charlie, where's the UK in that? Where's Crawley? Sent to us with Crawley, would you?

I don't know where I am. I can see Italy. Oh, like, zoom in, zoom in. Oh, no, there's France. I can see France. So we're crashed into Greenland. So we're crashed into Greenland. So at this point, and this.

This is what, 10,000 years ago, is it? Britain is connected to France via a land bridge called dogging land. Dogger land. We also connected to Germany, the Netherlands and Denmark. I guess it was like

a no man's land where dogging was rife. Yeah, now you'd say that's the hard shoulder off the M3. But before, there was a sort of all the three countries had like a no man's land

where you could just dog as much as you like. Yes, exactly. Terrifying. So yeah, and it's only about six and a half thousand years ago, Britain becomes an island separated from continental Europe. But have you heard about theories to reach... Original Brexit six and a half thousand years ago.

Yeah, exactly. So it was a very politically divisive... Very politically divisive. A narrow referendum to separate themselves from Doggerland. Do you know that Doggerland, people are talking about bringing back Doggerland? Good Lord. Because what you do is you dam the North Sea.

Right. Look, look, if you put a dam between Cornwall and Breton, Brittany, and then you get the top of Scotland to Norway, and you just down the whole thing. What happens to fish and chips? You get a lot more land, I guess. You could walk to France. No, we can't have that.

We can't have that. But there are people are talking about it, genuinely. Who's talking about it? I don't know. Right. It's so funny, you're just saying mad shing. Someone else. Someone back on, would you?

Someone back on. Not my job. So, Pangia is where the world is one. Yeah. We are the world. Yeah. We are all one world. Free love,

yeah. Woke nonsense. And then, thankfully, someone with sense, about 7,000 years ago, starts to break away from the French. Yeah. We evolve less back hair.

Sorry, when was Panjia? How long ago was Panjia? Millions of years ago. Right, right, right, right. Breaks apart slowly 200 million years ago. So this is what we were talking about the last episode where they get to Australia. There's about 90 kilometres gap at this point between Australia and Papua New Guinea. Right.

So this is where Graham Hancock starts to come in. He says there must have been an advanced civilisation because there's no way a seafaring. A seafaring civilization. Right. Because he says that people could have got to Australia. My boat. And also what's satisfying about the Panjia thing is if you look at, Africa and South America, they do perfectly jigsaw.

It's Tetris. And it's the same rock on the coast of South America as the coast of Africa. Yeah. It's quite nice. Anyway, so Pangea breaks apart. Yeah. There's no more.

Britain's distinct from France. Kind of. Would there have been like dates? Did cavemen go on like dates? Do you think? Did they like schmooze? I think it was more fucking over a rock, really. Yeah, like pulling culture.

Bend me over a rock, would you, yeah. Shab your uga up my booga? But there's no like suns, like go and sit and look at the sunset with your booger they probably did look at the sunset probably have meant a great deal to them yeah yeah so i think that's just starting to come through but i don't think there's a lot of romancing no i also don't think there's a lot of impulse control no sort of pull around animal skins up and just have at it sexual assault you're not sure how

yeah i guess if you want to if you want to be real yeah it's just pre me it's slightly pre me too it's just before me too this harvey wine won't see if you just woke back then yes uga He'll be viewed as a feminist. Yeah, a feminist extremist, Harvey Weinstein. Yeah, so climate change brings the end of the ice age. Yeah. Large parts of the world start to warm. The ice caps melt.

Um, areas submerged as sea levels rise. It becomes warmer. Europe becomes covered in forests. Blah, blah, blah. Present day Britain starts to emerge. Right. Finally. Yeah.

I'm in the disabled toilet. I pulled the red cord. Someone's turned the lights on. The focus is just coming in. Yeah. I know where, I know where the poo needs to go. I don't need any more help.

Thank you. Thank you for helping me. I'm in France. I can see the toilet. Yeah, it all works. So, what are humans doing in the early Mesolithic era? The first large groups of hunter-gatherers come together and they're, this is where they start hunting various things, deer, cattle, elk.

Hunting sheep. Hunting sheep? You don't really think about the sheep is a huntable. But I don't know how sheep survived because they seem like the easiest things to hunt in the world, right? Yeah. They're kind of just big targets, aren't they? Big fluffy targets.

But you have to chase sheep, don't you? But also, I should say dogs are around. Oh, right. And they're used as the... Gumba! Yeah. Oh, sorry. Oh, sorry.

Yeah. We are joined by a caveman. Yeah, we defrosted the caveman. His name's Ag. Thanks for joining us, Argue. So, yeah, how would you hunt a sheep, I guess? It's the first question. Uh-huh.

Yeah, no, I don't know. No, stupid questions. But, no, but I mean, like, how, what would there be, like, group tactics and stuff like that? Oh, go. No. Right. Fair enough.

We'll come back to you. We can't, we can't know, really. But they found berries, nuts, and it's nomadic. Everyone's a gypsy. Afeiture! Yeah. It's mainstream.

Gypsy, this is mainstream. Yes, exactly. Anyone who's not a gypsy is a gypsy. That's what they would have called gypsies with people who live down. Why are you sitting down, you gypsy? Get those filthy gypsies off my lawn. Yeah, exactly.

They're sitting down. The world's my lawn. Exactly. It's upside down, that. Yeah. So, but tools are starting to, they're starting to use wood, I think. At some point they say that it really should be called the wood age, because most tools are made of wood. Yeah.

And they've got like cleavers and. They don't have pencil sharpness to them. Butter knife. What? Butter knife. I get it, butter stone. What's that? Uga, Muga.

Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, you're right. I guess so.

I guess so. Do they, do they, um, ask. Do you masturbate? I guess they would have masturbate Yeah, but do monkeys masturbate? Charley? Yeah, we do. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Microliths, I got a microliff. It's a tiny and very sharp. Model stonehenge. How big are your balls? Decent size, which I think also adds to the optical illusion. It's a magic eye. Yeah, it looks like a dwarf on two exercise. Urbals

Dwarf on two space operas. A garden gnome on two... No, it's like my two-year-old on a spacehoppers. Adult spacehoppers. So microliths are sharp shards of flint. Stop me if this gets triggering. Sharp, sharp shard of flint

that you tie it together to make like axes and scrapers and scraping tools. So, humans are making little fishing hooks so we're starting to fish at this point

and nets are developed and we should say so this is kind of like this is between what 10,000 and let's say 5,000 BC and this is where Hancock, Graham Hancock

starts to come in we should talk about him I asked to put Graham Hancock because I'm a big fan of Hancock Yeah explain to our thick listeners who Graham Hancock is first time

because so the history community he's a controversial historian he's technically not a historian I think he's more of a journalist he's one of our lot he's one of our lot we're in the same we're in the same point I believe that us and Hancock

we're sort of like history fan TV we're outside the ground we're not managing yeah we have no education that this is us this is us about history yeah that's us talking about gerbils yeah yeah that's us going

blood blood blood yeah yeah you got the job on a set the camera I don't know what you do recommend You are nothing, you have a food, and you had a waste of time. Yeah. So, yeah, we're history fan TV.

That's Graham Hancock, basically. But Graham Hancock's theory, right? Yeah. He says that because he doesn't understand how the pyramids are built, that, um, what's that, Charlie? That's just a sexy little cave, man. I know, it's a photo, it's a photo, yeah. He says that because he doesn't understand how the pyramids were built,

uh, that there must have been an advanced civilization that is missing from our knowledge of the human story. Yeah. So pre-Egypt, he thinks there may have been, or during Egypt, a civilization that understood, like, geometry and astronomy and stuff. So pre-Ease age, the Ice Age basically wiped out all traces of a very advanced civilization. He thinks that civilization in the Egyptian time is restarting a civilization that was destroyed by a comet when the Ice Age ended.

But the thing about Hancock, he shows the power of a posh British accent in America. Yeah. And so that's why we're a big fan of him. A lot of this podcast, we were riding off the back of our accents. Well, America, this is a history pocket. Exactly. In Britain, I think this is... And he is very...

And also the thing is, because most historians are so dull, if you can be kind of charismatic in any way... I love listening to him tall as dwarf. Yeah, it doesn't matter if it's true or not. And it's interesting, because I listen to his episode of Joe Rogan, and he's great on Joe Rogan, because Rogan's the perfect... No. No, no, no.

It's a different guy. Even though Joe Rogan does clearly have some Neanderthal DNA. Clearly, yeah. But it's really interesting because Rogan's the perfect guy to speak to Hancock, because he, any claim, he's like, wow. Yeah. And it's like, it's amazing. What should they both go at each other?

But this is, this is Hancock's big thing is that because we can't find a ship wreck yeah, older than 6,000 BC, everyone thinks that there were no sea face civilization before that. But he says the absence of something doesn't disprove it, right? Then we could all just say that about everything we don't understand. Yeah. So it's like, well, the reason you don't understand. How many fingers are I holding up? Exactly.

You can't know. You can't know. So it's four. Yeah. But you can say that. So he doesn't know. He doesn't understand how the pyramids were built. But it's like, well, yeah, the absence of you knowing

doesn't disprove that they were built by someone that we couldn't know. What's nice, and it's similar with a lot of conspiracy theorists, is it's more they want to get involved. And the more kind of endearing aspects of it is they want to be... Charlie's just good with meandthorn milk. I mean, it's come up with the Neanderthor milk, to be fair. Oh, God, look at.

Oh, my God, look out. Get that one up. Get that one up. No, no, no, no. Get off, get off, get off, sit down. That's fucking, I'm, I'm over that. Go back, go back. Get that up.

Look that one there. Look at the north. Oh, go. We've got, we're running up. Sorry, sorry. Sorry. We get, uh, fucking prehistoric Lisa Ann off the screen. What's a prehistoric cold shower?

What's the equivalent? Ice bath, I guess this is, yeah. This is, uh, this is the first ice baths. I was got a chubby. I just got a chub on. Yeah. So, do you want to talk about this, this boss man temple they find? Yeah.

So, get. Ggeppi-Tepi or whatever is good. Gbeckley-Tepi. And it's interesting, a lot of the best shit has been found in Turkey. And I do think Turkey's underrated as maybe the most

historical country in the world. Homer Rectus, isn't it? Yeah. All of the good shit is actually found in Turkey. And so there are discussions that maybe the beginning of civilization actually is in Turkey

at any places, because Chattelhoic. So this is the earliest known site of what could be a city or a settlement. Yeah. So it's not technically the first city that's, uh,

in like, Brother Brug-bug-bug- How are we saying that? Uh-oh. Right, okay. Brother, that's the first city.

Yeah. But then this is the first kind of known urban environment, settlement. So boring. Do you not, would you not find that interesting? No, it doesn't,

I find this stuff. It's the first site of any thing, like, remotely. I think because you're first to do something doesn't mean shit. Yeah, doesn't mean it. It doesn't mean it. It doesn't mean it.

It's not as, is London now. Yeah, get a photo up at London Skyline and compare the two. Oh,

well, Sadiq's London. I think it's better than... I want you're saying Cataluic because Sadiq's London. See, that's banging. That's fucking great.

That pumps me up that. Look at that. Yeah. Fucking ashtray. But it's... It's 8,000 BC and it's... It changes our whole conception

of when you start some good shit. Anyway, Gebetli-Tepi is a more sacred site because it's potentially the first temple. Yeah. And he kind of uses it

to show that we are more advanced than previously said and also why a lot of debates are going he wants to get in there he wants to excavate but the historical community is not excavating that much they only done 2% of the site but apparently what the reason Hancock's getting in there is that Hancock wants to get in there

let me add them yeah the reason why they're not excavating is because in a hundred years we'll have much better excavation tools and if you excavate now like has happened on many sites you'll fuck it you'll fuck it for everyone else. So it's kind of like a long-term thing. If I went there with a spade, I'd fuck it up.

Massive. Yeah. Yeah. Spade is like, that doesn't matter. Yeah, you wouldn't know. But I think,

the thing is, with Hancock, when he's like, he goes on about the pyramids, how they're like geometrically perfect and they align with the North Star. He's one of my favorite types of white guy, though. I love a nosy white guy.

I like, oh, yeah, we need to talk out Pradley Walsh on the Pyramids. Have you seen this? No, what's Bradley-Lost on? Play this video. So, you know, out of nowhere, this radio appearance of Bradley Walsh,

it's giving Glenn Hoddle talking about disabled people not being reincarnated because they send them a past life, whatever. Out of nowhere, Bradley Walsh has not really seemed to speak about any of this stuff. Clearly, in lockdown, had been on a lot of websites. Play it. If you times that by 43,200, you get the polar radius of the earth. But this is Hancock's theory. Yeah, yeah.

This is Bradley Walsh saying. Check out the big stars, big series, and blockbuster movies. Streaming on Paramount Plus. Cue the music. Like NCIS, Tony, and Ziva. We'd like to make up her own rules. Tulsa King. We want to take out the competition.

The substance. This balance is not working. And the naked gun. That was awesome. Now that's a mountain of entertainment. Paramount Wolf. What did your ancestor really do all day. Beyond names, what were their lives like? With Ancestry's global historical records,

you can discover incredible stories about how your ancestors lived and worked. And for a limited time, you can explore select occupation records for free. Imagine finding your great-grandfather's RCMP records or discovering your ancestors' name in the UK and Ireland Nursing Register. Don't miss out. Free access ends August 24th. Visit Ancestry.ca for more details. Terms apply. that running a small business is a journey, from startup to growing and managing your business. That's why they have a dedicated small business advice hub on their website to provide tips and insights on business banking to entrepreneurs.

No matter the stage of business you're in, visit td.com slash small business advice to find out more or to match with a TD small business banking account manager. The base of the pyramid, and you know, which is almost 750 foot square, and times that by 43,200, you get the circumference of the earth to within 98.9%.

It's extraordinary. It was built in the reign of Kufu. All right. Yeah, right. It was built in the reign of Kofo. Yeah, but listen, stop in it. It's not true fan TV. It is, but the point is,

is that where the fucks he got 43,000, 220, if I times your dick by 40,200, I'd hit, say it'd be something. Yeah, what does that mean? Who cares? It's such bollocks. Yeah. I'm so sick, but also

what are they trying to prove? Yeah. I do they. Who cares? And also, everyone's like how do they build it. I'll tell you how you build it. They don't actually know how old it is

and it was built by Neanderthals. It was stronger and they could lift a higher stone. Oh, do you think that's actually... Why wouldn't they be that? Lift. They're like tons. Neanderthals wouldn't be able to lift that. Well, you know, how do you know that?

Well, because we've got the bones of Neanderthals. No. We haven't got the bones of another form of human who might have been around. So this is arguing on fan TV outside. It is. Yeah. you don't fucking know anything laugh but what I'm saying is

we haven't found we maybe haven't found bones of people or that were big enough or strong enough to lift that shit so we could we couldn't but that sounds quite Hancocky to me

that these super strong other human beings who built the pyramids to me that sounds a bit crackpot well it does but Hancock is saying that the absence of something doesn't disprove

it doesn't exist and then he's saying that but this is what happened but this is what happened we can't know what happened so that means this happened. Yeah, exactly.

It's like, well, no, we could have, they could have been giants. And listening to him on Rogan, it's really funny because they're talking about how, you know, in many ways they're more technologically advanced than we are today. They might not have iPhones,

but maybe that understanding of moving stone is better than we have today. We couldn't build the pyramids today. We do it in a fucking day, mate. If we put all our civilizational focus on building the pyramids, we'd do it eat, China doing like three hours.

Yeah, they'd use slave labor like they did for the originals. Yeah. Why change a winning formula? Exactly. But yeah, with cranes, you'd be able to build a pyramids super easily, right? Hours. The way that people are talking about the periods being like,

it's even more advanced than we are now. It's like, if we wanted to, today, we could build the pyramids. Yeah, but also, why the fuck would you build a pyramid? Who cares? Yeah, it doesn't mean anything if it's built now. Try building the shardt, dick, Ed. Shardt's harder to build in the pyramid. Yeah, imagine if the fucking.

If the shards was there. If the shards were there. I'd be like, right. Hancocked onto something. Bradley Walsh. Bradley Walsh. Get Bradley on the phone. What's going?

What is going? How have they built the Birch Khalifa in 4,000 BC? What's going on? Maybe we should ask someone who might have been around that time. That's true, actually. Oh, who do you think built the pyramids? Ucabuga! Right.

I guess so. Right. The first agricultural revolution, the Neolithic Revolution. This is the key to the first societies and civilization, right? This is the beginning of the Neolithic period. And it's basically farming. Yeah. The long road to Clarkson's farm.

Yeah. Starts now. Yeah. Now this is what? But this is when everyone's Caleb. 8,000, 6,000 BC. Yeah. Everyone's what?

Everyone's Caleb. Yes. Caleb is the journey from Caleb to Jeremy. Is this story. Everyone is Caleb. Yeah. And Caleb is good at farming and nothing else. Yeah.

At some point, they develop other skills. Speech. It's not Caleb. It's the, oh, me, yeah, is that guy? Is he called Trevor? Yeah. The guy who's properly Oxfordshire.

I grew up in Oxford. And everyone thinks, assumes it's posh, right? But this is the kind of people you grew up with. A proper Oxford accent. It's Gerald. Gerald Cooper. They have to put subtitles on.

And there's a running, there's a running joke with Clarkson's farm. Jeremy Clarkson genuinely does never know, no, no knows what he's saying. Yeah, yeah, I guess so. I think Clarkson's banned food intolerances from his pub.

Yeah, he has. Yeah, yeah. It's really near me. Because it's woke nonsense. Yeah, you can't have like wheat intolerance. You go in there. But I have an idea to set up a restaurant. is if I ever set up a restaurant

and it's called you get what you're given and it's whatever I feel like cooking Oh that's something there's something now if it's good food and it'd be like

if I'm up for it I'll do like a slow roast like it's my dick in a box not big in a box it'll be like beef rib or something and if I'm feeling tired I'll do beans on toast

and it's the same price and you get what you're given and it's about learning to be a fucking good little boy or girl and you'd be grateful manners that have been lost be grateful

yeah so basically going from Untogether is to farming as soon as you start farming, you basically free up timer. Time. But also interestingly, for most of history,

the majority of homo sapiens are believed to be lactose intolerant. Still lactose intolerant. Look at the lactose intolerant map. Yeah. China. We're living in the milkiest place. We're like X-Men genetic freaks. Northern Europeans, Scandinavians, we've drank so much milk and beer

that we've worked out how to do it. Only really white people can digest milk properly. Sort of. Look at that. Look at that. Yeah. So look at percentage. Well, Africans can't drink milk. Yeah. 80 to 100% of Chinese people

have lactose intolerant. Yeah. You look at India, very few people. It's only northern European, Russians, Slavic people, white people who can really concern the whole. But you look at Australia there. Can you digest milk?

You can you digest milk? You look at Australia. On the map, doesn't it see, you can see the settler, like it sticks out like a sore thumb. Yeah. Why can Australia suggest milk? It does prove the problem.

point that maybe Australia shouldn't be there when you look at that map. It's like what's going on there. It was that milky outlier at the bottom. But so as as farming starts people can digest milk

and beer, beer starts around, when does beer start? earliest beer is like 6,000 years old. Sick. 7,000. So pints. Pints are 7,000 years off.

Do you think a beer, I don't know, you just don't, you didn't realize it's older than nearly everything. It's older than civilization, really. Well, yeah, I mean,

it's the beginning. It's like the first thing we invented. It's like man. It's like man. dog beer. Yeah. That's the...

And what, so it's bread juice? Fizzy bread. Yeah, fizzy bread. Yeah. Do you like beer, rug? Mm. All right.

They start farming, barley, wheat and rye are like cereals. Yeah. So people are eating cereal, I guess. Cheerios and stuff. Cheerios.

Yeah. Goet and nuggets. Golden nuggets. Golden nuggets. Gugga, boogas. Do you eat golden nuggets? Yeah.

Still to this day. Sometimes, yeah. That's crazy. I mean, sugary cereal is unbelievable. It's the worst way to start your day. It's the worst way. It's the worst when it start your day.

No, it's exceptional. Charlie, Charlie, you were half an hour late to record. I was having my golden nuggets. You walked in through the last episode because you were eating golden nuggets. You should start your day with eggs. Yeah, yeah. Eggs.

Well, you're on the big egg thing because you... I'm on the big egg. I've got a personal trainer and since I've been seeing him for about four months. You've got a personal fat shamer. Personal fat shamer. I'm paying to be shamed for my sins. And since I've started seeing him,

I've gained weight and I've got piles. So I don't know if I'm doing it right. I feel like, doesn't feel like progress to me. You're on the mint pie diet. It's not, I've had to abandon the mince pie. I was on the mince pie diet. But he's got me eating eggs and, uh, he loves eggs, drinking protein.

Yeah. This guy loves eggs. Eggs and oats. He said that you've, you've, um, explained to him like eating food for pleasure and he's sort of like, like, it's quite a nice relationship, uh, because he's, he's 24 or so, right. It's really sweet guy. Yeah.

Uh, fresh out of uni. And he's telling me how to like, uh, do kettlebells. and I'm telling him how to cook something that's not cat food because he just eats like tinned fish and rice he's uga bugger

yeah no I mean in a way yeah I'm training his tongue and that sounds bad but I'm training his so his tongue

is uga bugger his tongue is my fat belly and you're actually to health is ogabugger yeah exactly who's this I don't know what are you about to pick now

just just my fish for me a 12 o'clock meal I'll have it with a rice cake yeah it's this it's all this stuff oh Christ Danny's trainer puts him on a strict diet it's like those bits oh man turn that off Charlie

yeah it's like eat eats like that you know those videos of they're obviously wind up this is what I cook for my blue collar husband after a hard day and it's just like some frozen steaks in a pan and just pouring water on it the dirtiest looking yeah but that is kind of how he eats

See, it's tin mackerel. Apparently, the amount of protein you're meant to eat or I meant to eat is astonishing. Yeah, but these guys weren't eating this protein. So when they talk about like going back to what were you... No, what they... The paleo, they were eating whole cows. Were they?

They'd have a cow that just keep eating. But then... But also, I must say, this is smoke salmon. Smoke salmon starts here. Does it? They're smoking fish, these people. Smoking fish thousands of years ago. Because Homo sapiens are the first people,

maybe the antithols do this as well. They're smoking fish, they're freezing it. The And the Andersons are freezing it in the ice. They've got little... So they're meal prep. Meal prep. Right. Tupperware boxes.

That's me for the week. So Asia, obviously, they start fanning about with rice. Yeah. Rice to meet you. Millet in Africa. Traces of the first known rice paddies. Are we talking about grain? What do we doing grains?

What do you mean are we doing grains? What does that mean? What does that mean? What does that mean? Are we just like going through country grain? That maize and barley and stuff. stuff. Yeah. What do you need to know about us?

Just wondering what we're up to. Are we doing that right now? Brilliant. Yeah. Cool. Just checking. Just wondering what we're doing. Do you decide? Do you something to add? Can I just interrupt?

No, I like, uh, I like, uh, I like, uh, I like, similar to our kit. Right. Mm-hmm, we go, we're good. Mooseley. Yeah. Christ. That's the word.

It's too all, isn't it? Yeah. To be honest, I think you might be a better producer. Yeah, I think I'm going to switch, I'll go out. We might have to just tap in. Yeah, but Musley is like oats and stuff, isn't it? It's the classy cereal. Yeah, I like Musley, but I guess that's not really what we were talking about.

No. What were we talking about? Maze and barley. So agricultural food production led to the abandonment of nomadic lifestyle. Name and grains. Yeah. And then... But the paleo diet doesn't include grains, does it?

Because paleo is pre-farming. So farming is when they start making bread and beer. So this is 7,000 years ago. This is where the process starts. Process food, ultra-processed food. It's not ultra-processed. It's just processed. Ultra processes then factory.

So it's still, the process is starting. Right, so RFK Junior is starting to go, this is, this is not good. They're turning, they're turning wheat and they're making oils out of seats. The bread, the bread's become oil. So, aware of the bread, beware of the bread. So I reckon there's probably an oogabuga back then who's saying, guys, we need to go back to eating just raw, eating raw. Yeah.

So agricultural food production leads to the abandonment. Well, no, it's the opposite of now. everyone's eating keto everyone's eating the raw beef diet and then there's one guy saying we need to process our food yeah

it's upside down land it is and everyone's going we need to put some sugar and all of this trust me we need to start processing this tastes fucking disgusting but they must have the shits they must have done about them

but also ideas of foods like the idea of a banana right the idea of a banana think about the the protonic form of the banana yeah you see them in big yellow fucking bunch you know Charlie shoves up his ass a big bunch

they would have been tiny nasty hideous things that through farming and evolution they'd become these juicy delicious things chickens were small and small and all of the food would have been absolutely

terrible at this point yeah and un diverse so with the invention of cooking food our intestines becomes smaller which leads to cities now that doesn't make sense to me in the script

yeah I don't feel that's a jump that's a great jump it's a huge leap I'm going on Rogan going it was only when we stopped shitting massive logs that we developed cities. Wow.

Wow. I think it was a civilization that made the toilet. Yeah. So Chafel Hewik, all these early sites Quebecli-Tepi,

they're all in Turkey because that is part of the Fertile Crescent. We ready to move on to the Fertile Crescent? Please, my friend. My friend. So this is

101 for this period of history. This is Autist Unite. That's the world's dank, stinky pun. Yes. And as you can see, the first real cities end up in the world's

fanny, which is, you see that warm little wet between the Tigris and the Euphrates. That little warm fucking place in there. That's where all human civilization started. So the Eastern Mediterranean and the, so what, Iran, Iraq, what's now Israel? It's a dank warm place.

Which is interesting. Basically, most places had like three cereals and grains. Right. In the Fertile Crescent, I believe it was like 17 of the kind of ones who used. So for like a cereal, it's like those little selection boxes used to get in hotels. They have like eight of them. Oh, this is quite interesting. It's going to be pornography, isn't it?

Yeah. Yeah, it is. You're wrong. I got up. You're making it out. Get it off. That was quite interesting, though. Yeah, it was fascinating.

Fascinating. Farming starts in the fertile crescent. Because it has, it's just, yeah, it's one of the most fertile places. It's also very silty. So I think that's like the perfect balance.

My wife's quite silty. What's silt? Silt is, I guess it's like, it's like a wetland. Christ, turn me on. Five hundred and five higher. No, we don't know. A natural wetlands.

But what's interesting is I went to Jordan three years ago, which is in the fertile crazy. I've been hiking through my wife's photo crisis. I've got big shoes on and sticks. I'm hiking down there. If I ever get lost. Graham Hancock speaking about my wife's boat. I've been there.

There's an advanced civilization. Really? The fertile Tintin. Fertile Tintin. Yeah, Quebec tepies down in my, your wife's purse. Can we get, I think I've got to sit next to you guys. No, no, we're not getting, not yet, no, no. The smell.

The smell alone. This is, when do people stop smelling? Do we know? A lot of people still smell. I haven't had the odium for a week. Do you want to, do you want to bat? Yesterday, on the way back from Bristol, you were wearing two coats and no pants. Jeans without pants, yeah.

Jeans without pants and two coats. It's crazy. I forgot. It's fucking crazy. Must be hard on your, and you're, are you circumcised? No, but naturally I am. I actually, I called up. You got a natural circumcision?

Right, hang on, what? I don't have a full Vorskin. I called, I called my mom age 20 and was like, am I circumcised? What's going on here, Mum? I'm not. I just don't have one. What's the big idea? But I actually think I'd rather not have one.

No, I think it's, they look horrible with. No, but I don't, I don't want it to be like a bruised old. You want to have some, like, protection. Yeah, you want a bit of sensitivity. This is what I think that the, um, that Willie's with four skins look like. King Kong works. Yeah. But it's the natural

form of the penis. No. It's also, if you believe in God. It's the natural form of the penis. It is. We're talking to a guy

who's looking for any extra yards he can find down there. I can't be jumping stuff off. He can't be jumping stuff off. He is strabbling for any extra length.

Yeah. But also, when's the first circumcision? When's the first circumcision? Because we've got to think about what they were doing that with. Is it Stone Age or Bronze Age?

Yeah, they're using a rock. Are they using obsidian. Yeah. Are the Aztecs, you know, what are they using? But basically, I went to the fertile crescent. And it's the most barren place in the world. I went to the Dead Sea and Jordan on the other side from Israel.

And it looks like God on the second day. It's just dirt. Yeah. And that's it. Right. And maybe some salty water. But this is why they start circumcising, isn't it? It's because the dirt gets in your, in your bit.

But that's in the fertile crescent. So what I don't understand is why is the most barren place I've been to, the most fertile place. It doesn't really make sense. Well, now it's now it's barren because they've used it all. Right, I guess so. She's been run through. It's Bonnie Blue down there.

Yeah, I went to the Dead Sea and it was, it felt like, body blue. Eight types of grain in the Fertile Crescent. Anyway, we need to get to the first cities, right? So what happened in these cities, it's the, well, there's no sanitation. They found traces of animal and human feces inside the houses.

Mixed up. Mixed up. together? Well, I don't think you'd shit in the same place your dog was. Right. Well, maybe,

maybe, we don't know. Who knows? But they didn't have toilets. 30% of all the human remains from the site of Quebec or whatever show signs of bacterial infections. What, so they're just,

they're not washing their hands and they're just... What, they're washing their hands in? They don't have sinks. So they're just ill, all in the mail. But they're wiping. Yeah.

I guess they're wiping. They think 8,000 people may have lived in this city. It's pretty. With MX Platinum. Access to exclusive Amex pre-sale tickets can score you as our trackside. So being a fan for life turns into the trip of a lifetime. That's the powerful backing of Amex.

Presale tickets for future events subject to availability and varied by race. Turns and conditions apply. Learn more at amex.ca. This episode is brought to you by Peloton. A new era of fitness is here. Introducing the new Peloton Cross Training Tread Plus, powered by Peloton IQ. Built for breakthroughs with personalized workout plans, real-time insights, and endless ways to move.

Lift with confidence, while Peloton IQ counts reps, corrects form, and tracks your progress. Let yourself run, lift, flow, and go. Explore the new Peloton Cross-Training Treadplus at OnePeloton.C.A. It's the matchat or the three ensemble Cato Cephora of the fact that I've been to deniche who energize all time?

It's the ensemble. The form of standard and mini-regrouped, call-o-ben. And the embellage, too beau, who is practically pre-a-doned. And I know that I should They're offer. But I guard

the Summer Fridays and Rare Beauty by Selena Gomez. I'm sure. The most ensemble a gift of the show show show

for Shifora. Summer Fridays Rare Beauty Way, Cephora Collection and other parts of Vite.

Procurre you for a great for a quality of price. On link on C4A or in a magazine.

Urban violence starts now. Okay, right. There's a problem in our inner cities. Dogwistle language starts here. Yeah,

Sadiq's London. Sadeke's London is in the fertile crescent. Skoles recovered indicate people were killed by blows to the head from behind so sucker punch

sucker punch donkey punching yeah so this is the first kind of stone age remains to show signs of like attack and violence with all the other ones we think maybe it was like front on animal attacks okay so the sneakiness the sneakiness so this is the first sort of

this is not cricket yeah okay so cricket's not around but there's lots of not cricket yeah and the larger food supply and the regularness of it this is when people start to focus on activities that are not just hunting and gathering. Ab-sailing. Ab-sailing is one of them. Water Park. Water parks start now. Um, paddling calls. You're right, Charlie. Yeah. There's a loud noise. There's a high. Um, you know, um, theater maybe now shamans, theaters, artisans start to emerge.

And again, this is what, an artisan's like someone who makes a pot, though, isn't it? Artisan is someone who's like a mix between artisan. So wanker who makes beer. Or artisanal. Wankers start making coffee and beer now. Yeah. Okay. They've got big moustaches. They've got tattoo sleeves. You've got macho latte, all this nonsense, tattoo sleeves. They think they're better out than you because they're serving coffee, and they've got a screenplay on the laptops and they're going to get made.

Anyway. Yeah. So because there's a regular food supply, people start to have roles, don't they? Yeah. We've got to give some roles to the other homoes up here. Yeah. So it's where the homoes event theater and shamans and cave paintings and religions and possibly religion starts coming up here. It's like rich kids doing art degrees.

Kind of. Yeah, exactly. It's because you don't have to. The first trust fund starts now. Exactly. Yeah. So art expands. So it's still done in caves, but due to the warmer climate, there's some open air shows,

cliff faces. And these are starting to generally depict humans. So I guess we have a sense of, there's human consciousness, you know. Yes. Language, I guess, starts to develop, right? Yeah. Because this is pre-hyroglyphs, I suppose. But there's some stuff in Spain where they also found the first Down syndrome skull.

Were you here for that bit, Charlie? No, you missed that last time. Who's that? They found disabled ruins in Spain or some kind of disability. Different shapes, skull, I can tell. Let's get, sorry. Let's get the old, get the calipers out on Charlie.

So even though it was the Fertile Crescent civilization naturally sprang out of that, it's not the only place that happened. Independently of this, it also started the Indus Valley, which is Pakistan. Right. And on the yellow river in China. So this is around the same time, even though it does start here, independently of each other, it's all starting to sprout up.

So this is, what, 7,000 BC is one of that. And it's happening all over. So we've got burying they're dead. Now, this could be, well, it's obviously a hygiene thing. Right. Although I guess, I mean, how would attune to bad smells would they be? Because everything would smell bad. I think just a nose peg would be one of the best inventions.

Yeah. Because it deals a lot of the problems. Yes, it does. You can be as stink as you like. I've got a nose peg. Yeah, I can just, I can, I could, I could, I can, I could, I can, I could, I can, I can't, I can't, like, um, mesolithic grave sites contain, like, uh, there's photos of people buried with their dogs. Yeah. It's nice, isn't it? Yeah, but I mean, well, I guess maybe craft starts now. One of the largest stone age cemeter is discovered is the, I don't even fucking know. I don't even fucking, Latvia. Latvia. How on earth I meant to say that? Latvians, sort it out. So, this is thought to contain 400, uh, buried men, women, and children. they've got like these animal tooths pendants and hunting and fishing equipment teeth which maybe implies there was some kind of afterlife they were thinking about some kind of religion

but also boats clearly now Hancock said this is start the boats this is start the boats Hancock says there are boats knocking about for ages yeah but the oldest shipwreck is 6,000 BC yeah again I don't know how the fuck anyone knows this for sure his thing is because older ones would disintegrated therefore they existed right there was so long ago that they their ruins won't exist but that means that they must exist so the first boats the first fishing nets um they're like a few logs i imagine just sort of tied together um yeah and this is the big thing the earliest settlers in australia arrived 50 to 60 000 years ago they could only have arrived by boat so that's agree that's not that's not true but into that into that vacuum Hancock pops up because what

Hang on does, he says this. He goes, oh, that's good, that's interesting. And then he goes, I reckon they flew there, actually. You go, right, Graham, Graham, sit down, right? I remember they're so big that they just did one step over the water. They're giants. They're giants.

And they flew. So they would have come from the... Sundaland. What? Why are you? Why am I, why am I? Why am I? Why am I?

Why am I? And arrived in Asia. But again, I don't know how they're crossing that on bamboo and sails. Yeah, but it could be trial and error, right? Yeah. Because you don't see any people crashed. So one of them probably did. A couple of them did.

If you have a bamboo raft, a storm could have brought you to Australia if you hold them really tight, right? But Northern Australia, and nothing's there. Yeah, but all the islands lead you. Yeah, but the closest island is still like 90 kilometres away. Where are we? Medicine and health. Right.

People assume that most Stone Age people did not live beyond 20 years old. Right. Right. Hot teens, barely eagles. How old are you? Bugabuga. Right. Now, how old are you?

Boogga, boogah. Yeah. So most down age remains have discovered they're between 20 and 40 years old. Statistical surveys suggest an average age for about 30. I mean, I guess it's biased

by infant mortality rates. Yeah. People must just be dropping kids out all the time. Yeah. There's no protection. Because not many people were dying at 20, right? No. You died at 20 or 40?

If you made it past two, Yeah, you're 11 to 40. Cancer was virtually unknown. How can they possibly know that? Do you have to know about it for it to affect you? I guess, well, they just won't have known why they were dying.

Yeah. AIDS was unknown as well. Ooga, booger. So it was, you know, fucking hemorrhoids. Yeah. Piles, they probably had a lot of piles. Yeah, because they're just eating protein. This is my problem.

I'm eating too much protein. And I think apparently you're meant to counteract the protein with lots and lots of fibre. Fiber, you've got to have fiber. Yeah, but then where did you check? chips come in. What do you mean? As in, I need to have some chips.

You had to add that on as well. Yeah. Yeah. But you got to have fibre. Clean to the pipes. But I just mean that I'm eating so much protein and I think I'm eating a fiber as well. But it's just like, you know, it's like an arms race between, it's an arse race. Yeah.

The space race. It's a space race for my ass. The remains of a 20-something. It's quite funny to call a cave man. 20-something. Four-twenty-somethings. It's like a sitcom. Four-twenty-somethings in a flat in New York, working all out.

They had a leg amputated, so. amputated several years before they died. This is 30,000 years ago. So they were obviously some kind of medicinal, they understood that cutting a leg off would keep them alive. So early medicine. Okay. Yeah, that's, that's good. Did they have music? Did the cavemen, um... Yeah, go on. Oh, give us, give us a rendition of some cakes, some music that you like. To me, that just sounds like Fred again. Yeah. the end of the Stone Age it gradually ends

at different times and different places obviously it's still going in some countries there's an overlap between the Neolithic era and the beginning of the Bronze Age which is what

Egypt I guess Egypt starts using bronze Once the first Bronze and Civilisation it would be the Mesopotamia it would be fucking Yeah Mesopotamia Yeah Which is I mean

Where's that Iraq? That's Iraq So Iraq are using bronze first Yeah Yeah The race for bronze The city of Ur

brother and uduck and all that that's all bronze age until the mysterious bronze age collapse people don't know why it happened hancock's got must to know why the bronze age collapse charlie google what hancock thinks about the bronze age collapse he doesn't specifically offer it's it's too recent it's not it's not he talked about a cataclysm in 12,000 years ago yeah he's talking about the collapse before that he's talking about the stone age collapse so he's talking about that basically you got to the end of like sieve three space race and then there was a meteor and then everything since then has been a really hard reset he's having fun with it though but to be fair right to be

fair what's that Einstein quote about how i don't know what weapons world war three will be fought with yeah not that one i don't know what weapons world war three will be fought with but world war four will be fought with um stone tools yeah why nooks because we'll destroy civilization we'd go back to the stone age really well maybe DJ run that shit back the idea is is that civilization has a natural end when you get too advanced blow yourself up and then you start again so that's what Hancock's just saying that we're in like the second or third cycle of that yeah and then he's also saying that the amazon uh is a man-made forest most of it yeah i mean and that like a million people lived there in mega amazon cities right still to this day no they did right okay because

there's too many brazil nuts and we think there might be that because he said there's too many brasil nuts and brazil nuts are good for humans you can't call them that anymore do you reckon they call that that's what they call them schizophrenics in brazil in Rio. Yeah. He's a fucking Brazil nut, brother.

Fucking bag of Brazil nuts over there. Archaeological digs in the Tolenza River Valley in northern Germany revealed a possible site of a large battle. These fuckers are at it again.

They love it. They were Zeke-heiling 30,000 years ago. And now they're always doing it. All got blah. The remains of over 140 people

were at this site, many showing signs of grievous. injury. Experts suggest this could have been the size of a battle involving up to 4,000. That's such a big number. Surely not 4,000 mores. I don't believe it.

We don't know who was involved. I've got a strong idea. But the artefacts recovered include a mix of stone and flint weapons and more advanced metal versions. So we think maybe this could have been a battle between remnants of Stone Age people and some other group, some other scapegoat group. Right. Maybe.

Who are running things. Who are secretly running the Stone Age. I tell you, I tell you who put those stones there I tell you who built Stonehenge Stone Jews Are stone Jews the thing when do Jews start That's 2000 It's around the Egyptians though

A Jew, yeah Egypt It's old as hell They're so old Jewish people originates with the Israelites A group that emerged the land of right Okay, Iron Age Yeah So the stone age period ends

Because cultures that maintain the old technology Can't compete with bronze Right Which gives you an idea how fucking stupid they are bronze is the worst of the three metals and you're being outdone by bronze

there should be a fourth plinth for just for just stone yeah what do you think ugabuga exactly yeah what do you expect get him on a fucking podcast

yeah terrible podcaster hug he's blinded by bronze yeah we're using fucking microphones yeah copper copper wiring

you know about that yeah uh well thanks so much for listening uh there's basically There's so much we don't know. Yeah. Have you got anything to plug?

Uga, booger. That's on the screen now, yeah. So in below, if you want to see Uga, Buga, Buga, I guess. Thanks so much for coming on, mate. Thank you. If you want more, more? Who do you think he likes more?

Huh? Who do you like more, Ag? He's got a bigger head. Yeah. Oga bugger. I think me and I. You look more prehistoric than me. I'm closer on the line.

I think so. On the line. I think this is an evolutionary. who's going. You, me, Charlie, Ug. Well, actually, Ug, Charlie's the bottom. Charlie's the bottom. Charlie, Ug, Horatio.

Yeah. Nice. Well, thanks for coming on, Og. Oghur, bugger. So, if you'd like more, the patron this week is about Stonehenge. And there's a whole treasure trove. What about some of our favorite,

favorite patron topics? The Great Train Robbery was a great. Great Train Robberies. A brilliant two-part series. Ronnie Biggs, unbelievable. We've got, did Hitler escape to Brazil? That's good stuff. That's great stuff.

What other patrons have you liked, Charlie? The Gaesha special, the Zulu special. I like Nambla. Nambla. Our most controversial. The North American Man Boy Love Association. It's not very historical, that one, but it is quite spicy. But it is an association.

It's an association. They can't take that away. They can't take that away. It turns out anyone can start an association. It's activism. In a way, it is. It's pro-pedo activism. They're like Jamila Jamil for pita.

Chapido Chapido Jamito Jamil Chapido Jamil Chapido Jamil Jepido Jamil I might start doing a character called Javieriting conversation like that

join the patron for just three pound of month I might start a character called Jepido Jamil I'm gonna wear a letter and you were just spreading the word of noncery no but going on podcasts and being so

articulate about about why like anti noncing is bad age is just a number just being so like the righteous fury of the pro-pedo activist the problem is that they're always when anyone challenges them in a car park

they're just quivering wrecks they're spineless pedos today pedos need their Enoch pal right that's what we need they need their sort of rivers of blood speech rivers of young come and on that

I think that's a great great advert for the Patreon Charlie what have you oh I've seen this for you I was thinking this really Peteo poos himself Pito postman who's confronted and shits himself

You are pooing You're currently pooing You have pooed Charlie Do you know what I thought when I watched that Me? Yeah I thought it was you It reminded me of you

I am pooing If you got caught for noncing And you're by a postal van And you're going Have you been put? Yeah, no I am I'm I'm pooing I mean, there's something very human about that, though, isn't it? That's the most human things we've seen this series.

You get accused of paedopharm. I'll be shit at myself. The human story is to be accused of paedophilia in a car park and to poo yourself. It's him saying I am poo. It's not a shit myself. It's like, I'm currently pooing. I think therefore I am. I'm a pedo, therefore I'm putting.

Descartes. Daycart. I'm a pedo because therefore I'm pooing. Yeah. Well, listen. Thanks for joining us. we've got through a real I mean it's green it's green squared this week greens on greens on greens um we'll be we'll be into history next time we'll go back

into history please please get me out of here pull the red cord get me out of this toilet I'm neurotypical get me out of here join the patron for more filth and we'll see you next week for more history thanks ag for coming on thank you good boy Oh, go, go, go. Every weekday morning, the bunker brings you a brand new, in-depth look at just one story. From the chaos in Washington to the seismic political shifts in the UK to business, economics, history and pop culture. Or start your week, our essential Monday morning roundup of the week's upcoming stories.

Weak up through the noise to bring you what matters. That's the bunker. News Without the Nonsense. Every weekday. With me, Andrew Harrison, Ross Taylor, Jacob Jarvis, Gavin Esler, Zinging. And me, Seth Treble. Find us. wherever you get your podcasts.