Fin vs History - Measuring Skulls When The Women Have Gone To Bed | Prehistoric Man (Part 1)
Episode Date: October 20, 2025Secure your privacy with Surfshark! Enter coupon code FVH for an extra 4 months at surfshark.com/fvh How did Prehistoric Homo Sapiens win out over Neanderthals, and was it simply because t...he Neanderthals were autistic? The show for people who like history but don't care what actually happened. For weekly bonus episodes, ad-free listening and early access to series, become a Truther and sign up to the Patreon patreon.com/fintaylor CHAPTERS: 00:00 Ugo history 07:18 - lots of homos 13:44 - homo errectus 19:11 - Homo Hobbit 22:27 - Neanderthals and amateur phrenology 27:41 - the prodigal producer returns 30:03 - dinner party convo 33:26 - f*cking or fighting 38:22 - Homo sapiens 45:45 - Early page 3 48:43 - The end of an era Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
When you're with Amex Platinum,
you get access to exclusive dining experiences and an annual travel credit.
So the best tapas in town might be in a new town altogether.
That's the powerful backing of Amex.
Terms and conditions apply.
Learn more at Amex.ca.
This episode is brought to you by Peloton.
A new era of fitness is here.
Introducing the new Peloton Cross Training Tread Plus, powered by Peloton IQ, built for breakthroughs
with personalized workout plans, real-time insights, and endless ways to move.
Lift with confidence, while Peloton IQ counts reps, corrects form, and tracks your progress.
Let yourself run, lift, flow, and go.
Explore the new Peloton cross-draining tread plus at OnePeloton.ca.
Where's your playlist taking you?
Down the highway, to the mountains,
or just into daydream mode while you're stuck in traffic.
With over 4,000 hotels worldwide,
Best Western is there to help you make the most of your getaway.
Wherever that is.
Because the only thing better than a great playlist is a great trip.
Life's the trip.
Make the most of it at Best Western
Book direct and save at bestwestern.com
Welcome back to Finn versus History.
I'd like to start this episode with a trigger warning.
We are going deep.
Deep than we've ever gone before.
Into autism's core.
We are meeting the architect of autism.
This is the Titanic submersible.
This is.
Today.
We're James Cameron.
We're James Cameron going deep into the Yuga-Buggerlands.
It's prehistoric man week.
You're completely flailing about here.
I'm in, I feel like, you've got nothing to hold on to.
I'm in a disabled toilet, and the lights are off, and I'm on the floor, and I'm trying
to find that big red cord.
Help.
I've tried to wipe my ass and fall off the toilet.
Help!
Help.
This is the Stone Age.
yeah this is history for non-verbal people yeah um people who struggle to live independently
we're we're we're going back to the beginning here history for ugly women would you say
sorry the history ugly women i go i go i go i go i go i go do you know what i didn't didn't
encounter any i go mingoes yeah right i didn't i didn't encounter any women in the but exactly
and it's also like you know women can't go in submarines because they lose the fertility it's like
it's too really is that a thing yeah you know about this don't you come on this is good stuff
Pete, you know about this, don't you, Pete?
No.
So, when you go super deep down, you lose all your sperm.
Because we...
Really?
Because we produce sperm really easily.
Yeah.
When we get up again, we've become cum laden again, right?
But women, they have a set amount of eggs.
So Osama cum laden, when he was buried at sea, lost all his sperm.
Yeah.
And if he comes back up...
They'll start.
It's the Osama cum laden we know and love.
But women have a set amount of eggs.
Yes, I knew this.
Women are born with all the eggs they're ever going to have.
So when they go under, they'll lose them all.
So that's why you can't, that's why the, you know.
You can't conceive underwater.
Well, it's just more like why it's, it's boy zone down there.
Is it?
It's not for women.
No, it's not for women.
You shouldn't be nosing about down there.
No.
It's frankly, the deep is none of your fucking business.
Because your inside will just be like a fucking omelet.
Well, there's a great joke.
I can't remember who does it about how women are born with all their eggs.
Yeah.
And the reason that men aren't, the men aren't born with all the sperm that are ever going to
is because by the age of 12,
they'd have just lost everything.
The race would not continue.
Yeah.
Yeah, speaking of the human race,
we are, no women do not lose
the wrecks in deep water.
So you're, you've completely just,
even for this podcast,
the amount of misinformation off the top.
I mean, that's extraordinary.
I mean, it was a legal ban until 2011
because people.
I think it's just because you're trapped down there
and the last thing you want is any nagging.
It's a funny thing for the government to make up
to stop women.
No, you can't, you'll be infertile, actually.
You'll never have kids, so you can't go down there.
No, I tried to impose a similar rule on the shed at the end of the garden.
If you go there, you'll become infertile.
Your insides will explode.
Your room will explode if you come in here.
But then she walked in one day and I had to backtrack.
Yeah.
No, today we're talking about prehistoric man.
It's, um, I'm lost, completely lost.
Something about the Stone Age.
This is before history.
It's arguably not even history.
Well, no, history starts when people start talking.
Yeah.
And this is, they have, this is biology.
This is the village origin story
This is the prequel
This is, I mean history
Starts what
This is the phantom menace
This is the phantom menace
In every respect
I mean I don't know
It's a load of nonsense
It's weird nonsense
It's tedious
It is tedious
History starts in the bronze age
You might say
Yeah
Which is what Egypt
And it ends when Blair comes to power
Yes
97 the end of history
This is before Egypt
Yeah
Oh, way before.
Way before, Egypt.
So let's just get people up to speed.
So 30.8 billion years ago.
Fucking hell.
Right, hang on.
Hang on.
Now, I must, again, in a disclaimer,
if you're listening to this
and you're awaiting a meeting
with your bank manager,
stop now, you will default
on any loan payments if we go any further.
Yes, as you said,
13.8 billion years ago.
Bang! Bang!
You know, bang and the dirt is gone.
Yeah.
Instead, it's bang and everything exists.
Bang and the dirt's arrives.
Yeah.
Four and a half billion years ago.
jump forward.
Earth.
Do we not want to go
every year?
Let's do it year by year.
13.7999 billion years ago.
The bangs happened.
Yeah, what's happened
between the Big Bang and Earth?
But at this point,
anyone who says
they know what's going on there
is just talking about their whole
dust particles we got.
Dust.
So it is banging the dust of rights.
Bang on the dust is here.
Bang and the dust is here.
Four and a half billion years ago,
3.8 billion years ago.
It feels like Earth is pretty
is older than you'd think
right in the whole scheme of things
if everything is 14 billion years
and Earth is almost 5 billion
that's we're older than I thought we'd be
right. No?
No.
Billion.
Yeah.
Billion's such a big number.
Yeah. It's sillian, yeah.
I don't, I don't know.
It's just too big a number.
Yeah. I don't believe it.
And in 3.8 billion years,
emergence of orgasms, organisms.
2.8 billion years ago.
They emerged from the depths.
The big, ah.
And then 245 million to 66 million years ago.
Dinosaurs.
We will do a dinosaur episode.
We will leave that for now.
And then 2.5 million years ago,
which I suppose is when our timeline starts.
All man's.
Humans evolve in Africa.
Yeah.
And this begins the Paleolithic era.
Yeah.
Which apparently is 99% of human history
is the Paleolithic.
era, which is 2.5 million years ago to about 10,000 years ago, or 10,000 BC, and then
everything since then is 1%. Isn't that crazy that everything we've done so far is only
less than 1% of human history? But I think if you look at human history, it's just more
is happening more regularly exponentially, right? Yes, yes. So 2025, you know, Bonnie Blue
is a new phenomenon that we've been talking about. And that's all happened within
eight months. This podcast. This podcast has been eight months. Yeah. But then for two
million years, you, you'll invent one thing every 500,000 years.
One notable thing will happen in half a million years.
Well, if you look, we just skipped millions, billions of years.
Yeah.
Because, yeah.
Someone will come up with a shoe and now will be like, well, that was pretty quick for
200,000 years.
Let's take, let's take three million years off.
We've invented one shoe.
Yeah, so, but it's just fascinating, isn't it?
It's a dizzying 1%, less than 1% if you, at this point, Hitler is, is a spec in a
monkey man's eye.
Yeah, I guess so.
Crazy.
Yeah.
Butter,
but a spark,
but a twinkle.
Yeah.
So his ancestors
are around here though.
It's comforting to know
that somewhere,
somewhere in East Africa,
there's a Hitler monkey.
There's a hitler,
Boogna,
Bougna,
Bougarna,
Bougna,
Bokinni,
Bokinni,
Bokin a bloggerna!
Yeah.
So homo sapiens
start to evolve in Africa.
Yeah.
We are homo sapiens.
Sapiens. That's ours. Our listeners are
We don't know. They're more homo basement in this, maybe.
Homo Smellians.
Now, there's several different types of human at this point.
Yeah. There's a homo.
That bit would be interesting, wouldn't it? To have loads of different types of human.
I do find this, yeah.
But I mean, your view of racial science is you think there's those different types of you.
Well, we'll get to racial science. This is where I started to actually find the way that's interesting.
It's when they discovered it all and went, oh yeah, this is the missing link between monkeys and
colonial subjects.
Yeah.
So there's death from about what, uh, two million years ago.
Yeah.
The, the homogenus starts.
Don't like them off.
They're all homos for two million years.
Prehistory is gay.
Right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then, and then really it's a journey of getting straighter.
Yeah.
Um, so the homogenus.
Yeah.
This is my problem with it.
This is not history.
It's biology.
Yeah.
Which I did not like.
This is a history.
It's, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a fat trans woman with a pink hair in a wheelchair.
That's what this history is.
Keep talking. Don't threaten me with a good time.
A fat trans woman with pink hair in a wheelchair?
Yeah.
Well, that's what this is.
This is where we're at.
Right, okay.
Because I think it evolves into more straighter as it goes along.
And that's currently where we're out.
This is the apex.
If we look at the evolution of the type of history, people who are into this history.
So are you saying that you've got like apes that start walking.
And then before apes, you've got a fat trans woman with pink hair in a wheelchair.
They're getting skinnier and onto crutches.
Yeah.
And their hair gradually gets blue for a bit and then black.
Until it's World War II and it's a straight man in a suit.
Straight man reading a book about Churchill.
There's lots of different homos.
Right.
It's famously.
Yeah, there's Homo Neanderthalus.
Yeah.
Homo erectus.
Yeah.
Homo.
They're all homers.
Yeah.
It's like the LGBT community.
Right.
It's a rainbow coalition.
It's a rainbow coalition.
Let's have a look at these.
So the first one is homo habilis, right?
Which is Latin for Handyman.
Okay.
So he's like, yeah.
So he's the, supposed.
We think, again, we don't know any of this stuff.
So this is the oldest one.
This is the first non-monkey man.
Right.
Right.
We think.
And this stuff changes.
It's chicken and an egg, isn't it?
It's monkey and human.
Yeah, we're not chicken and egg.
It's more like, because chicken and egg is a stupid thing because it was clearly the chicken.
But at some point...
Well, hang on.
What do you mean it was clearly the chicken?
Where's the chicken come from?
If you think about it, it's quite...
At any point, you decide what a chicken is.
Yeah.
That's where it starts.
At one point, something that wasn't a chicken, laid an egg.
that gave birth to a chicken to a chicken right so then it is the egg so it's the egg actually
it has to be the egg sorry that's what I meant was anyone who says this the chicken is really
stupid right I just said that it was a chicken no it's course it's the egg it's great to just the
theatre of ideas here testing fellow historians this podcast is sponsored by surf shark yeah
now listen if you using public Wi-Fi did you know you're at risk of what I don't know
well it's much like public toilets
you're at risk of getting
chlamydia, AIDS, everything
sexual diseases in the air
travel in the air right
So these are digital STDs
I think it's real
So this is a Johnny, this is a digital Johnny
If you like, Sirsark's a digital condom
Right
That you place over your laptop
Stop at getting AIDS
They send you a big
massive condom
And you squeeze your laptop
They also send you a tiny condoms.
They know the kind of people
who use their service
and they're just like...
How many times you have to say
it's not everyone's diggers
as small as yours.
Quite a lot of people.
So they also send small ones?
A lot of them are smaller
because I am pretty much average.
It's your laptop.
It's your laptop quite small for your height.
It looks like a small laptop.
You got an iPad.
I've just very tall.
I've got big hands.
That's you got an iPod mini.
This is an iPod.
This is a MacBook Pro 15 inch.
No matter how small your cock is
It doesn't mean you stop you from getting sex
Or it probably makes you less
Averse to SDDs
Because less people want to have sex with you
And you can't reach the vagina
Yeah, there's less surface area
Yeah, exactly, yeah
If you're carrying around a big old fucking hog
What, you think you're scraping STDs off of you?
You just
Like an elephant's trunk
Just
Yeah
Yeah
I've got a little pocket knife
You're a surgeon
Surgical sex
penis
balls
butt hole
surf shark
VPN
this is a risk
free 30 day
money back guarantee
and if you use the code
FVH
Foxtrot
Vagina Hotel
four extra months of
Surfshark
on us
yeah
go to this link
yeah fat vagina horse
the fat vagina horse
surf shark
dot com slash
FVH
four extra amounts of
surfshark
don't let online threats catch you off guard
buy a big condom for your laptop
you've got to put a condom on your laptop
or else you'll get chlamydia
you'll get digital chlamydia
yeah so the beginning of the
paleolithic period
the first species identified as part of the
homo genus the LGBTQ community
is homo habilis
little fella
little boy
a little hairy fella
little hairy fella he looks like he does look cute
he does look cute
I like to have one of these guys around
Yeah, yeah, long arms
Very hairy, hairy shoulders and back
He looks like a sort of
A boss man, bring a kid to boss man
Day, bring a kid to work day
A cabb shop owner's son
Homo Abelis is a cabb shop owner's son
Yes, yes please my friend
Oh, you're learning
Yeah
Chili garlic
Anybody next please please please
It's work experience
Bossman work experience right
Now he didn't look like modern humans
I disagree as I said
We've seen a couple of these people
Yeah
Those of you haven't seen Charlie, it's not far off this.
It's not far off.
Charlie, by the way, who hasn't turned up today.
Yeah, by the way, the reason why we've got Pete, do you and say hi, Pete?
Hello.
The reason we've got Pete behind them on the mics today is Charlie just didn't turn up for work.
No, and he woke up, we don't know where.
Also, he produces another podcast as I do.
It's not out.
No, his wallet, his keys and his jacket are all here.
He was in the office yesterday.
No, he's not answering his phone.
No, I mean, he'll probably arrive at some point.
Yeah, and then we called him and he said,
yeah, I've slept through 15 the last,
because I've been up till 3.
You know when someone answered the phone going,
fuck, you are right, you are asleep.
He'll be here at some point.
But it's quite inappropriate, isn't it?
We're talking about K-Man.
Anyway, speaking at notably smaller brains
and more ape-like proportions.
But enough about our producer.
We're talking about homo habilis,
and we think he was related to an earlier ape-like creature
called Australopithecus Afrikanus.
Making shit off at this point.
Who fucking knows.
I mean, you could just tell us anything and we believe you.
Do you know what I mean?
Because no one's boring enough to go into this
apart from like 15 people.
Yeah.
They could just be having a jolly.
Yeah.
And just making shit up.
Because it's not like we're going to check it.
No.
I'll just be making loads of shit up.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's fucking bisexualsaurus.
Rectors.
So we think that homo habilis, the handyman,
they're called handyman because they're the first human-like things to use tools.
Is it the opposable thumb?
Well, there's a thing about pinching, isn't it?
Right.
It's a thing about how humans can pinch like,
this.
Yeah, Italians are the...
Women in public.
Yeah.
Hey, hey.
Chabela.
So humans can pinch like this.
We've got family friends who lived in,
English who lived in Italy for 20 years.
An Italian man once pinched Pippa's ass.
And she had to run into her house and he held it until he shut the door on him.
He was literally running down the street.
She was like,
she had to shut the door on his hand.
the most Italian man in the world
Wow
Fair play
But yeah
That's what I mean
Is that the Italians have evolved
The grip
The strength to their pinch
That I don't have
I'm less evolved
The opposable thumb
Is very opposable for the Italian
Italians are the height
Of evolution
Because they're able
Yeah
And you think about the
You know
The evolution
Breeding stuff out
Yeah
What's who's successful
Italians are the most
Successful at breeding
Because they can hold on
to women's ass
For days, hours
I can't do that
So eventually Italians will
Win out in the evolutionary struggle over British people
Yeah
We'll after you
And they're spreading their seed like nobody's chucking out a window
Crop duster
Tabella
Please
Anyway
Then we get to Homo Erectus
Who
These are the first I'd say
He's good looking
Yeah
He's kind of hunky
So we go from a like little monkey boy
to pretty lean.
But in a way,
I feel this is what women
really actually want.
They kind of pretend
that they want other things.
They kind of are still.
They're still sort of pining after this.
This is kind of the female gaze.
Is it not?
I think it is actually, yeah.
Deep set jaw.
Hairy.
And if you're listening,
at this point,
we have very small foreheads
because we have a small brain.
Right.
So we have big eyebrow,
big brow.
Here we go.
This is what women want,
apparently.
Big,
big, overbite,
like big kind of monkey face.
I think what men want is...
Flat nose.
What men want is like Sydney Sweeney.
Yeah.
And what women want is this.
Yes.
You're right.
But they want this,
but he writes poetry.
Uga, bugger, uga,
Ugo, bugger,
Ugo, boogga,
it's Ugo, boog, booghaikus.
That's what they want.
So this is the first guy to stand up.
Now what's going on in their brain,
because when you're trying to think
about what's going on in an animal's brain,
do you know what you're thinking
what does a dog think?
It's sort of you can't really
I sometimes go to text my dog
and then remember that I don't
doesn't have a phone
and cut and couldn't reply.
What would you be texting?
How much do you love him?
Do you want to walk?
Walk question mark?
Yeah.
But at this point we could probably
conceptualise a little bit
what it was like in their brain.
Oh go go go go go go go go.
Because it would,
what's the vision there?
Is it just being like being in Charlie's brain?
Is it just what we've seen
but just everything is just
Yeah.
is it just stupid
no I don't know if they have
is it stupid brainers
they they're the first ones to
the first ones to stand up
first guy to stand up this guy
yeah
they were always
before that's before lenny Bruce
before Lenny Bruce
we should place this
this is sort of 1.9 million years ago
so have I got news for you
have a news view is in development
it's in development
it's not been picked up yet
but his slop and Merton are
they're going into Hattrick offices
we've got an idea here
about something very
very wry. Could we make
wry comments? So believe or not, this is
pre-Hav-I-Got News for you. I mean, it's terrifying.
What is the world
if I've got news for you isn't there?
Yeah, the first guess for Homo erectus
kind of... Angus Deaton wasn't born yet.
Terrifying. Anyway,
1.9 million years ago, he's this guy stands up.
A monkey stands up. Yeah. And he's got
cum gutters as well. Look, if you're watching.
Absolutely fucking smoke show.
Smoke show.
I mean, it's like...
It's like David Gandhi.
He does look like Dave.
David Gandy, if you just stop before the head.
Yeah.
I mean, it's a hairy gandy.
He's got hairy shoulders.
David Gandy, if you've got PVA glue and pubs all over him.
Yeah.
Maybe it's just a phase you're going through.
You'll get over it.
I can't help you with that.
The next appointment is in six months.
You're not alone.
Finding mental health support shouldn't leave you feeling more lost.
At CAMH, we know how frustrating it can be trying to access care.
We're working to build a future where the...
path to support is clear, and every step forward feels like progress, not another wrong turn.
Visit camh.ca to help us forge a better path for mental health care.
Did you lock the front door? Check.
Close the garage door? Yep.
Installed window sensors, smoke sensors, and HD cameras with night vision?
No. I...
And you set up credit card transaction alerts, a secure VPN for a private connection, and continuous monitoring for our personal info on the dark web.
Uh, I'm looking into it.
Stress less about security.
Choose security solutions from TELUS for peace of mind at home and online.
Visit tellus.com slash total security to learn more.
Conditions apply.
Tim's new cravable raps are made for the times your boss said the what now?
Or your teacher mentions that thing I'm a bob.
Need to pick me up.
Snack back to reality with Tim's new craveable wraps available in Chipotle or ranch.
Plus tax at participating restaurants in Canada for a limited time.
They had a larger brain than homo habilis, two-thirds the size of the month.
Is the bigger the brain, the clever of the monkey?
Don't get me started on phrenology.
But this is the first guy to control fire, we think.
Right.
We think, I don't fucking care.
We, the royal way.
But they are conscious.
Well, I guess so.
There's a level of conscious.
When do you draw that line?
Well, is it...
Because I guess when the people are talking about consciousness in the Enlightenment,
they were drawing their line racially.
Yes.
So it is all about where you decide to draw the line, right?
Well, in the book, Sapiens, which is very popular.
Yeah.
Good book.
You know, it opens
to the whole chapter about Peugeot,
which I think is a strange way of opening.
Well, yeah.
It's so he's really talking down to people.
Right.
But he has to do because he's a very clever bloke.
Right, right.
He says that there are three main revolutions
in the human story.
Cognitive, agricultural, scientific.
No, no, no.
Come on, come on.
That's, I think that's over, isn't it?
I think it's gone back.
There's a sexual counter revolution.
Yeah, it'd be also if you just put that in there.
Sexual counter revolution.
Yeah, it's just the horniest guy.
Missionary the lights off now from now on.
Women getting their tits out.
I feel industrial is probably more.
Cognitive revolution,
agricultural, women getting their tits out.
That's the 90s,
Las Mags.
So he says there's the cognitive revolution
which I guess at some point,
I think he credits it
70,000 years ago,
so we're still way after this.
Because these fellas,
they're still kind of monkeys.
Right.
And he says that...
Monkey!
Monkey!
They're northern.
And he says
the key to their success
or Sapien's success.
No, us
is that we can
cooperate in groups larger than a hundred
because we can imagine
stuff. Okay. So he
says fiction is the actual difference between
us and apes. Because you can't convince
an ape to do something for
a story like religion or
nationhood or whatever. No,
it's fucking or bananas. It's fucking or bananas.
Which, you know, me on a bad day
you won't convince me to do anything
if it's not for a banana or a blowjob, right?
Whereas for them it's like
you know the gruffalo
exactly
yeah
something like that
yeah
yeah
the people will die
for the gruffalo
the gruffalo I think
is after homo
right yeah
yeah
rector's homo gruffalo
I think
homo rector controls
they have more advanced
tools I guess
because their thumbs are better
yeah
this survives for two million years
right
that's a long time
long old fucking shift
this guy's done
so we're standing up
and I think
we're running a bit
yeah
we were waiting
for half an hour
for charlie
and that felt like
a long time
yeah
million years.
Two million years.
So then we get to,
this isn't really a key species,
but it's quite funny.
Homo fluoresciensis.
So this is like a side species.
Yeah,
side quest.
The Hobbit.
So around 700,000 years ago
on an island in today's Indonesia,
a species is thought to evolve
from a population of Homo erectus
that were all dwarfs.
Tiny.
Was island island shrinkism?
Well, there's island gigantism,
and I guess it's the opposite.
Because you know island gigantism, right?
The reason why the Komodo dragons are massive
It's because on an island
You can dominate
Small creatures can dominate to the point
Where they become huge
They get really big
That's why you have giant tortoises
Well it's mostly why Scandinavian
Kids are taller than our kids
Why?
Because they're eating better
Fish
Fish, I guess
Stinky fish, I don't know
Yeah
Supposed by the time they're five
They're about that much taller
Okay, fair enough
Anyway, these fuckers were all dwarfs
Yeah
They're all the size of penguins
Look we've got a picture up there
That's kind of cute.
Talk about, I mean, that's the beauty standards at this point.
That's a thick, a thick homo-fluensius.
Is that a woman?
Is that a woman?
I think that's like their equivalent of Kim Kardashian.
That's the picture.
Big bum, tits out, big stick.
Yeah.
They weighed about 25 kilos, very small brain.
Evidence suggests they hunted baby elephants.
But they could hold sticks and stuff.
So that's still pretty like dwarf.
So everything's just mini.
It's like a model village.
But this is essentially, so
my theory is that
the female evolution
starts here. Right.
Modern women take
their cue from these fellas.
They're smaller, they have bigger hips.
Small brains. Small brains.
But what's interesting is on these islands,
the rodents are huge
and the people are tiny. Yeah. So it's like a nightmare.
That's crazy. You're like the same size
of the rat. Yeah. Yeah, here we go.
About 200,000 years ago, something like that, you've got these three distinct homos.
Right.
So this would be LGBT.
Alan Carr.
Alan Carr.
Alan Carr, Stephen Frye and Claire Ballard.
Yeah, it's all three people who've been on celebrity traitors.
Off the top of my head, trying to think of any gay celebrity.
It was like the only people.
They've all got big heads.
Yeah.
Very clear.
So homo sapiens originates in Africa.
East Africa.
Yeah.
Neanderthalus, Neanderthals, they're Europe.
Yeah.
And then Dennis Over, his name's not Dennis.
Not Dennis Irwin.
Not Dennis Irwin.
No, Homo Dennis Over.
They only discovered him about 15 years ago.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
In a cave in Siberia.
How's he doing?
Hey?
How's he done?
He's done.
Completely fucked.
But that's why all of this stuff is completely up for grabs still.
In that literally, they thought it was just,
home at Neanderthals and Sapiens
and then 50 years ago
like oh fuck Dennis was knocking
about yeah yeah
there were then then there's kind of
I guess a struggle for supremacy
sort of between Neanderthals and
but we stayed in Africa for ages
Neanderthals were Europe right
they got out there quick yeah
but Neanderthals didn't come out of Africa
but Sapiens starts moving about
yes at some point
Sapiens is like I don't like it
but Neanderthal Europe
Neanderthals actually should we get into
the Neanderthals so they develop
kind of like a
is it a similar time
They're around at a similar time.
Discovery in Nathan Hill Bonds was 1856.
So this is a fruity time for science.
Oh, I love this.
It's my favourite.
So take Neanderthals, they're big-headed.
They look like our idea of a caveman, right?
Well, all the ideas of cavemen,
our perception of cavemen comes from the 19th century discovery
of Neanderthal bones in Germany, the Neander Valley.
That's why Neanderthal was used as an insult.
Yeah, exactly.
Knuckle draggers.
So they found these skull cap and bones in a cave,
and this is just before Darwin's book.
They basically think, and this is, you know, this is a theory that I, a long bit of fan of,
that the skull they find is the missing link between black people and white people.
Right.
Or they think that at this point, why.
The other people's big head is the bridge.
It's the bridge.
Yeah.
Because at this point, it's empire, racism is a scholarly pursuit.
Yeah. For gentlemen.
It's not been degraded.
Yeah.
And so at this point, they think European civilization is the apex of evolution.
Yeah.
And so they think Neanderthal skulls are like a stepping stone on the journey to becoming white and enlightened.
Right, right.
Well, are they saying blacks behind Neanderthal?
I don't know.
Right.
But this is when you got the Caucasoid, Mongoloid and the other one.
This is when they were like doing it.
Yeah, it's three groups.
Yeah.
Which has been discredited.
The three genders.
Phrenology is rife.
Again, I'm trying to bring, I'm an amateur phonologist.
So I love this stuff.
But they find the skull.
And then there's a French guy who finds a skeleton.
in a cave in like the 1911 or something
and he's the first one to draw
the caveman stooped over
Ugo-Buga, so that's the first
on our thought, our image
of the Andeshors comes from that
20th century
Ugo-Buga, but actually
what they found is in
Spain, they found
a Neanderthal skull
with Down syndrome. Right.
And so, and they
he lives, the kid with Down syndrome live for a bit
which implied like, you know
implied that they were woke.
No.
implied they were looking
after him
which means
that Neanderthals
were actually
weren't necessarily
savages
they were like
caring
yeah they were
yeah
they had blue hair
basically
he found a fragment
of blue hair
in a skull
but they found
disabled
Neanderthors
that you have to
sustain a
a tribe
to keep
disabled
which again is like
what do they sound
like if
uga bugger is
like Stephen Fry
then what does
what does disabled
ogabugugga
sound like
like
what's the speech
impediment
went,
than we can.
They're stronger, the faster, right?
Maybe not faster.
Yeah, look, they're kind of squat
and they've got high hips
and big rib cages.
It was quite a recent finding.
I remember watching this on TV
like 10 years ago
it only just come out.
They're basically Neanderthals
weren't stupid.
They might even be cleverer than Sapiens.
Really?
They might have a higher brain capacity.
Yeah.
The number one reason
why Sapiens could defeat Neanderthals
is working as a group or community.
They don't have that sort of thing.
So they're sort of like autistic guys.
Yeah, I guess so.
Yeah.
But had worse social skills.
Yes.
Yeah.
So it's kind of like, Sapiens were like the high school bully.
Yeah, jocks.
Jocs.
Jocs.
Yeah.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, it was an American football team, basically.
Neanderthals are Millhouse and we're, um, whatever the other guy.
What's the other guy called him, The Simpsons, the bully?
Nelson.
Nelson.
Nelson.
We're Nelson.
We're Nelson and, uh, Nianthaulsons.
Because of Millhouse, yeah.
But we have 5% roughly Neanderthal DNA in us.
Europeans do.
Right.
So that means that we're...
Which means...
Well, this is where we get to the...
We don't know why Sapiens won out of Neanderthals,
but there's two theories.
Yeah.
One is that we fucked them and then...
Out of existence.
And into our...
Yeah.
So we interbred.
Right.
And then we've got a bit of their DNA in us.
Yeah.
And Neanderthors, it should be said, we're all in Europe.
And they were...
They devolved to adjust to the harsher conditions.
than Sapiens had.
Because Sapiens are in East Africa,
cradle of life.
Yeah.
And then Neanderthals are humans
that are like, is chilly.
Yeah.
So they were better at living in caves.
Could you do it on a cold, wet night?
In Stoke.
Yeah, basically.
We're in the Britannia.
But again, that's the thing.
Like Stoke are a good,
you know, you might be able to get
into the fifth round of the FA Cup.
But eventually, you'll be found out.
You'll be found out.
Because Man City are better at teamwork.
yeah so neanderthals were doing long throwings
so analysises in the anathol's
Sean die
and you might you'll get a couple of points
your knick-a-cola point
here it is here it is
here it is
here is our producer
what time we on what time we on Pete
we've got a stopwatch going
30 minutes 30 minutes in
30 minutes in go on
go on just go on get behind the wheel
come on
cheers Pete
we're talking about cavemen
appropriately enough
you would have love this episode
yeah this is you all this is you all
It's a shame.
It's all the worst one to miss.
I know.
Where you been?
Asleep.
Go on then, Charlie.
What happened?
Oh.
I set about 15 alarms.
Right.
And none of them worked.
What did you mean?
What did you mean?
What did the alarm just fade into your dream?
I don't know what happened.
I was up to like, I didn't sleep the night before and I was up to like three work.
It's fucked.
Yeah.
I mean, we just did our live show in Bristol, which was great.
Thanks everyone coming out.
We all went for drinks afterwards.
Charlie, this is like like 11 o'clock.
Yes.
Yeah, about, yeah, 11 p.m.
Ocottero, Charlie gets espresso martinis
because he's going back to work.
Yeah.
It's crazy.
Yeah.
He works very hard, Charlie.
He just doesn't work smart.
No, I mean.
He doesn't work smart.
No, no.
You can't say he doesn't work hard,
but he really doesn't work smart.
Work hard, not smart.
It doesn't like it's a long-term strategy.
Yeah, yeah.
It's like he's biting down on the bit between his teeth
and just putting his snout in the mouth.
Crazy.
So to...
What have I missed then?
Right, to get you up to speed, Charlie, we've...
Unfortunately for you, we've missed the dinosaurs.
We've ploughed through that.
We are...
Oh, Christ, where are we?
We're in Neanderthor.
We're about what?
We're between 100,000 and 40,000 years ago.
Yeah.
Right.
So what...
Do they have names?
What do you mean?
Like Derek.
It'll probably...
I mean, Ag is the popular imagination of what a stone at age man before.
We were just talking about how...
The reason that sapiens win out
over Neanderthals
is that Neanderth, Sapiens
can communicate
with large groups.
They're like, they're hanging out,
they're going to like...
They're hipsters.
They're hipsters.
They're hipsters. It's just kind of like
they're neurotypicals, you know?
Yeah, they are.
That is basically it.
Yeah.
It's that Neanderthals are autistic.
Very good at surviving.
They're having house parties.
Surviving on their own.
Yeah.
Whereas Neanderthals are Sigma males,
aren't they?
They're low wolves.
They're our listeners.
Yeah.
Do you think we've made a difference
if you're autistic as a caveman?
Well, I think people,
People think that there's a, some people have made,
I mean, this is where fun science is coming in.
People have made a link between autism
and the Neanderthal DNA.
Is that right?
I mean, I've said a lot of bollocks,
but I don't mind saying some more.
You're not a swing at that one.
Yeah, I think people say like Neanderthal,
if you have more Neanderthal DNA,
you're more predestined to have autism.
Well, maybe not even thick, just more, you know.
More like to have autism?
Yeah, that's interesting.
Yeah.
In certain settings.
Yeah.
In certain settings, you really thrive.
So, but we need to get to the, let's, can we get to the, that's true, is it?
But if there's Neanderthal DNA in homo sapiens, it means they must have been fucking, so that's
guaranteed, right?
That shouldn't be really up for debate.
Well, they were definitely fucking.
Yeah, but the reason this is, this is quite contested stuff, is how genetically different
are the three groups.
Right.
Because if they are, what the racial scientists, the scholars and races in the 19th century would
have said is that the different races that we see today all evolved out of different
species of human that's quite that's quite politically incorrect it's quite fruity you might say to put
it mildly and would fit a lot of um racial theories that's not dinner party stuff now
not some of my dinner party but it used to be yeah very polite conversation at dinner party
oh the women the women would go to bed and the men would talk about racial science
I'd love to take that bring that back right women you go to bed it's 10 p.m. me and the boys are
going to get the brandy out and talk about skull sizes.
Flyer Transat.
Seven time winners.
Champions out again.
By the seven time world's best leisure airline champions, Air Transat.
Your business doesn't move in a straight line.
Some days bring growth.
Others bring challenges.
But what if you or a partner needs to step away?
When the unexpected happens, count on Canada Life's flexible life and health insurance to help your business keep working even when you can't.
Don't let life's challenges stand in the way of your success.
Protect what you've built today.
Visit canadalif.com slash business protection to learn more.
Canada Life.
Insurance, investments, advice.
When you support Movember, you're not just fundraising.
You're showing up for the men you love.
your dad, your brother, your partner, your friends.
It isn't just a men's issue.
It's a human one.
That's why Movember exists to change the face of men's health.
From mental health and suicide prevention to prostate and testicular cancer research and early detection,
Movember is tackling the biggest health issues facing men today.
Join the movement and donate now at Movember.com.
Yeah, so Asians have Denisovan DNA.
Right.
So in the way that Europeans, or at least people, I think Africans don't have any Neanderthal DNA, which is, I guess, ironic, given that in the 19th century when they found the Neanderthal skull, they were like, yeah, yeah, that's an African, 100%.
So that's actually not true.
But actually Neanderthals are the true Europeans.
Which, does that, does that mean that more Europeans have autism than Africans?
Maybe.
I mean, it kind of makes sense.
Because, I suppose, Africans not a very autistic culture.
No, it's not.
it should be more autistic
although
why are you gay
it's quite an autistic
the trains would run better
if they had some autists
and they weren't fucking
I think we've solved
African time
yeah
yeah go on Charlie
do you think you'd clock
if you saw a Neanderthal
in the street
in like
I don't know
so the documentary I watched
they were like
if you put Neanderthal
on a suit
and like you know
put them on London Bridge
at 8am
he'd get a couple of looks
but no one
people like
oh I look
that looks a bit weird
but
we put you in a suit
But think about it, but there's, you've seen people with crazy face with deformities in London, right?
He's just, he's here.
It's just behind the death.
But you know, it's polite society.
What other option is there?
Who are you?
It's like, when I've got toddlers, so they're like, oh!
Yeah, obviously.
I mean, yeah, a toddler thing in Neanderthal in a lift.
Do you ever do that?
Yeah, I remember being in a lift seeing my first disabled person.
This is me.
Furious.
Yeah.
I remember doing that with a dwarf in a hotel.
you're kind of shocked and livid
what's going on here
so I've been lied to
well I could end up looking like that
I could end up
just my head gets bigger that's it
what's that mummy
pointing yeah pointing
it's that meme of Leonardo decapio
right so there's two theories
as to why
the sapiens went out
one is that they fuck all the Neanderthals
and they kind of absorbed into them
which yeah
But Neanderthal, found in the Yandah Valley, Germany,
German are very autistic culture.
Here it does, it does sort of read.
And in fact, do you know what?
Let's bring this up now.
Go on.
They found a bit of art from 30,000 years ago in Germany.
Right.
So this is Stone Age art from Germany.
It's a woman, and she is doing a Nazi salute.
Caveman art in Germany.
Blub!
Right.
Oka-blogabana!
right this is venus of glangenberg that's dated 36,000 years in austria
wow that is extraordinary austria yeah that's amazing was predetermined
look at that how fucking amazing is that the germans have been nazi austrian has been nazis for
40,000 years a 40,000 year rike a 40,000 year old rite crazy who know well maybe that maybe
you know not to get all graham hancock maybe there was an advanced civilization that we
don't know about in the human story
If you say you know, you can't be trusted.
We have found a Austrian Nazi salute figurine that's 40,000 years old.
We make so many discoveries on this pod.
We do break some new ground.
Yeah.
Who's talking about this?
No one.
No one.
The Austrians aren't.
No.
That's bad vibes for them.
The rest of the history aren't touching this.
Either they fucked them all or they...
The Great Replacement theory.
Yeah, basically.
The Andethals are being replaced.
Yeah.
So they're sort of Tucker-Cubes.
and Neanderthals going on their Foxy News saying that.
They didn't stop the small boats of sapiens coming over.
And yeah.
So they basically, because the sapiens come out of Africa and they go to the Middle East,
but at that time, they're Neanderthals in Europe, but no sapiens.
And there's no Neanderthals.
So people think that the sapiens didn't get to Europe because they were like,
uh, we, you know, we're getting fought off by the Andathors.
But then at some, weirdly,
Sapiens gets to Australia
before Europe.
Is that true?
Yeah, it is.
There's a land bridge then.
But no, there's not a land bridge,
which is why Hancock.
This is why Hancock thinks
as aliens or something.
It's because somehow Sapiens,
this is 60,000 years ago,
get to Australia
and there's no hint of Sapiens
in Western Europe.
But Hancock says
that they were doing cruise holidays
before they...
Yeah, but he's mad.
Yeah, he's mad.
But there are little gaps in our knowledge
that let him in
to say something crazy.
Yeah, you think it's Jet 2 holidays.
was around.
Darling, hold my hand.
Ocoboggo,
go,
go,
go,
go,
go,
yeah.
Um,
so there's another theory
that basically there's a sapien genocide of Neanderthals,
which is what kind of out,
they outcompete them.
Apparently that the last town was in Gibraltar that they think.
I love that.
Yeah.
Rorks drift in Gibraltar.
Yeah.
So where are we up to?
Let's get,
so say,
Sapiens, well, I know you don't know, you just woke it up.
Sapiens, the reason they win out is that they have slender bodies.
Get the photo, look at that.
Look at this, fucking little twink.
Fucking hunk there.
Woof.
Skinny.
So sapiens, they're less hairy.
Soft boy.
So in gay terms, we've gone from like bears.
Is this a twink or an otter?
I don't know.
I think this is twink.
Twink is the end of the line.
And erectus is like an otter
and fucking Neanderthal's a bear.
I guess so.
Yeah, right.
But erectus is before Neanderthal.
Yeah, but it's just,
Neanderthal seems more like a bear.
They're less hairy.
The story of evolution is that we get less hairy,
which is why parts of the Middle East
are less evolved.
If you are tuned to the racial science theories
that I like to read sometimes.
If.
If.
No judgment.
this is a
forum for ideas
it's a safe space
it's a discussion
you know
we've solved
the women have gone to bed
women have gone to bed
women have gone to bed
the brandies and cigars are out
you're waiting
just waiting for the door to click
right
let's get into it
let's speak freely
can we just speak freely
now the women have gone
what's going on
with the Middle East
have you seen the size
of some of those heads down there
they're big heads
Their shoulders are hairy.
Anyone else think something's going on?
I'm just getting a glass of water.
Oh, shit, sorry.
Yeah, sorry.
Terrible is going right of those.
Anyway.
There's surely something's going on there.
They've got hairy shoulders.
They're back hair.
Anyway, so humans have evolved
to be able to outrun any
animal long distance.
That's crazy, isn't it?
So, Mo Farrah.
Basically.
Yeah.
The reason we're successful,
in the savannah
is that we're Mo Harrah
Oh, we sweat.
So we sweat more than any animal
pretty much, don't it?
Yeah, because before this we were like dogs
and Prince Andrew.
Big tongue.
Prince Andrew, maybe he's got more
Neanderthal DNA than us.
So do Neanderthal's not sweat?
Charlie, can you Google that?
Do Neanderthal sweat?
No other animals sweat, maybe.
No other animals sweat.
I don't know.
Really?
Other than people.
Neanderthals did sweat.
There you go.
Horses and monkeys sweat.
Elephants can only sweat from
their toes. I may have some elephant in me. I get very sweaty feet. Right. Okay, yeah. And they would
explain a lot of my eating habits in my preteen years. But listen, the skull, the human skull has a
high forehead, a rounded brain case. A rounded brain case? Charlie, is your brain case broken?
Do you have a flat brain case? It's unrounded. Yeah, unrounded brain case. Prominent
chin. And the brain size is 1,250cc. I don't know why we've got it in motorbikes.
We've got it in Mario Carre. Mario Car difficulty. Yeah. So, so.
They're highly adaptable hunter-gatherers
They use complex stone, bone and later metal, obviously
And the key thing, which is what the Sapiens bloat would say
Is that they can employ groups of up to, you know,
1,000 more than more plus
So what they would do that they
Basically, no one else could organise a flash mob better than Sapiens
Sapiens are the only, we are the flash mob's leashes
We're Sapiens.
We're sapiens.
Well, we're on the fence about you.
Horatio and I are Sapiens, right?
You're, we don't know.
In many ways, I think you're the missing link,
personally, that's my own theory.
I think you were defrosted from an ice cube.
Yeah.
Is there going to be another one?
Hey, what?
Do you think there's going to be more?
I think there's going to be loads more.
Yeah, but we're talking about tens of thousands of years.
These are the ones we found, but I think they're going to keep.
Yeah.
Oh.
We're stepping stones onto something else.
Oh, right.
Do you think?
Well, yeah, obviously, it doesn't stop.
We're not the end of it.
Are we?
If you think about the phones,
I mean, this is, this is in a world where we don't blow ourselves to
shit, which we probably will at some point.
Yeah. But it's in, not that.
This isn't a world where we don't discover how to remove ribs and blow ourselves to shit.
Well, that will be the height of.
All productivity goes down because men have found out ways to suck themselves off.
There will be a genetic mutation where a guy is born with no ribs and can suck himself off.
And then he will win.
He will be the most successful human.
So ribs will be bred out.
Yeah, because there's nothing you can hold against it.
It's like money, I don't need it.
Because this is it, right?
Sex, I don't need it.
No, we're bent over.
then we get upright
and then we go down again
because we're going
it's like
what do you have
as collateral
against that man
in a deal
yeah exactly
he can leave any deal
he's like I'm fine
I'm fine
see you later
you didn't turn up to school today
well yeah
well what would I
yeah
so human evolution
we're like the height
in but then
we're evolving down
because yeah
we're getting less ribs
Anyway, but if you think about opposable thumbs
But sorry, do you actually think there's going to be
Another homo past homo sapiens?
No, I think sapiens will evolve
And at some point you'd start classifying
You'd say that's not sapiens anymore, that's something else
Yeah
Because I guess if you go 5,000 years ago
At the beginning of civilization
They were much shorter
And there's an evolution upwards
Is that evolution?
Because we're eating better
Yeah
Yeah, but also
And this takes case over millions of years
But if the more important phones come
There's a chance that our thumbs would evolve again
to be even more opposable
more better for phones
you wouldn't get tired
better for WhatsApp
yeah basically
get WhatsApp thumbs
but also
if you're if you're using
less brain power
because you've outsourced it
to Google Maps
then your brains
will get smaller again
so small heads may come back in
interesting to fashion
small heads big thumbs
yeah
that's my that's my
predict theory
so
sapiens start in Africa
they spread to
Middle East Europe Asia
Australia
now let's get to
yeah
sapiens are the first
guy oh this is what I was going to say sorry
Sapiens hunt in massive
groups which is possibly why they out-compete
Neanderthals because there's
evidence that what they do is they'd have
hundreds of them and
they would chase herds
of horses into like a ravine
into a choke point where they could
kill them all yeah and then like
they've got food and you sort of see that in cave
paintings yeah if you think about that it looks like
oh they're all in like a ravine they're just chucking in spears
so military strategy yeah starts
to develop because we can
communicate on a grander scale
than chimps and the and the boss
men that come before. But blokes being into military history
is starting now. Starts now. Exactly.
You know, cavemen bookcases have
Anthony Beaver, Churchill biographies
and then there's something also
about how we
this would be humans before
Sapiens but it's interesting. The big
our big thing
we were into was bone marrow.
We're bone marrow boys. I've said this.
I've said it's another podcast. I'm into bone marrow.
I went to St. John's. I had the bone marrow starter
and it's seen as this delicacy.
If you think about it,
that's the thing we,
it's the most important food
to humans have ever eaten.
Because it's the only reason
that we've stayed alive.
Yeah, it's the most nutrient rich
and it's good for brain development.
But also...
We're scavengers.
We were scavengers.
So what we do?
The be a carcass and the bee...
So, what, a lion had killed it,
taking a lot of this stuff off.
Yeah.
We'd see that and we'd wait.
Then the vultures would come,
pick the flesh off.
And then we'd wait.
And then we'd go and with our tools,
we'd prize the...
We'd the only people who could crack open
the bones.
Exactly.
and just suck the bone marrow.
So we thought
all the different like
trends and food
there was truffle was big
for a bit
Enduya
yeah
you know
there's all these little trends
but there was not really
any trends for it
it was just bone marrow
for about a million years
there was the paleo diet
yeah
was bone marrow
but they didn't have any
there was no one doing like
top jaw
no
well they all had top jaw
yeah
overbite
over bite
I would like to
there was one trend in food
for a minute
years is what I'm trying to say everyone was on paleo yeah um I would like to propose that we call
paleo uga uga I'm doing uga yeah yeah on the uga diet I'm on the uga diet um he's a lovely
bone marrow though but they wouldn't have been roasting it were they well they control fire yeah
so yeah they would have done because cooking meat means a little bit of parsley on sourdough bread
yeah gorgeous um they also they bury their dead which suggests a belief suggests a religion
or it could have been hygiene couldn't it
It couldn't smell.
You're right, Charlie.
So the great, yeah, it could have been smell.
So the great jump we've made is that we started making shit art, basically.
Yeah, it's fiction.
That's like the big.
That's what the Sapiens author, I forgot on his name, Her Hari.
Yo, Yuval Hari.
Yeah.
His thing is that fiction is the difference between us and the other homos.
Yeah.
We started letting women tell stories.
Yeah.
Yeah, women's stories.
Which means we conquered.
That's the big jump is that we've allowed women to start telling stories.
Yeah.
and turning off their dreams.
Uga-pug-pug-pug-pug-pug-pug-a-pug-a-cug-cug-a-cug-cug-cug-cah.
And cave-man are like, fucking hell.
Christ.
They bury their deads, which it could suggest afterlife,
or it could just be that they're really stinky.
Or Rickic Javet Show?
Hey?
Rick-Javation show after-lif.
No, this is before afterlife.
So, Sapin's the first people to do,
the first homos to do art.
Right.
I know a long history of homo's doing art.
Yeah, a long history.
This is the long road to homo's doing art.
And this is very funny.
There are sort of Paleolithic female figurines.
They're like body positivity influences.
Well, yeah, because they basically were like, let's not do heads or arms or feet and just do massive tits.
Sort of early page three.
Yeah, yeah.
Early page three.
Lucy Pinderus.
Yeah.
Lucius Pindarus.
This is Lucius Pindoros.
Exaturated hips, breasts, thighs and vulva.
It's beauty standards.
Yeah.
So she's got big lips.
She got an exaggerated vulva?
Can you zoom in on that?
Is that an exaggerated hip,
vulva? I guess that's an exaggerating.
That's a vulgar vulva that.
Yeah, it is. Is that a vulva?
That little crevice.
It's quite a big crevice. Huge.
Ravine.
Raveen.
Big boobs.
Yeah. So this, where was this found?
That was found. It implies
obesity could have existed.
But again, if we look at the penguin,
the penguin women, then I mean, yeah.
Yeah.
Do you think obesity could have existed?
I mean, I guess if they're really good hunters.
Well, it's mainly protein.
Well, no, because a high protein diet.
So a lot of the.
reason that we have the anxiety nowadays or some people do right is allegedly the reason that some
catholics have are anxious about things is that they um because we skip the food chain way quicker
than you should okay we escaped the food chain we biohacked we biohacked sort of yeah in the biohacking
is going back to stone yeah so sapiens are the first people to you normally you move up slowly
the eco, through the food chain.
But we were in the middle of it for millions of years.
So our brains are food chain brains.
Yeah.
So when we see sweet things, we want to gorge on them
because we were hunter-gatherers in the food chain.
We found some food.
If you found a fig tree three million years ago,
you just fucking eat all the figs.
Yeah.
That's why I eat 24 minutes pies.
Like a dog. You don't know where your next meal is.
Exactly.
Yeah.
So you binge because your systems are wired to see sugar
and know that it's rare
so you should eat all of it now
which is why I ate 24 minutes price
but now you go like American candy shops
fronts for drug trafficking in central London
yeah the fig trees weren't fronts
for drugs
but this is why we have the brains
we still have the
systems neurological systems that we did here
but we basically evolved out the
we like shortcutted
Rainbow Road shortcut the food chain
it's not fair it's not cricket
well you got Tesco's Explore's
Now.
Exactly.
Yeah.
For your local supermarket.
Yeah.
So I don't know what the point I was trying to make in.
But anyway, that's one.
So that's why we're obese.
It's because we can't stop eating and we don't have to, we don't have to gather or hunt food.
It's just there.
So we eat it all.
So you're not exercising to do it either.
Deliveroo.
Exactly.
It's deliberate.
Yeah.
The Paleolithic era ends at around 10,000 BC.
And now this is when the ice.
I imagine, sorry, when you're hunting as well, if you,
you had to hunt hungry
like I find shopping hungry
sometimes hard
oh you should never shop
when you're hungry
but I should never shop
when I'm hungry
but if you fail two hunts
you're starving
yeah
then the next hunt
it's getting more
and more important
and you're getting hungry
and hungry
yeah
like hunting
when you're hungry
I guess is maybe good
because it means
you're more committed
yeah
yeah tummy's rumbling
but that's
it would give you away
wouldn't it
because you're creeping
and you're having to
they found
with Neanderthors
and human
early humans
they found like
a lot of
trauma impact on their skulls from, they think,
animals defending themselves during a hunt.
Right.
So it was all fucking hand-to-hand combat.
Was it with the relationship with their parents growing up with trauma?
No, not that kind of.
No, not diving, go-bougu-gubug.
Paleolithic era ends around 10,000 BC because the Ice Age ends.
Right.
And so there's a lot of climate change, and this changes the whole ecosystem.
Right.
The Ice Age...
Do they regret a Thunberg at that time?
He's talking about climate change?
Yeah.
Yeah.
He's talking about how the Ice Age...
Oh, go, go, go, go, go, booger.
You have all good my future.
You've all good my booger.
She's had a rebrand, though.
She's got, she's got a fringe.
Yeah, it's the new album, right?
She's looking tidy.
She is looking tidy.
It's confusing.
Really?
Yeah.
I don't know.
Yeah.
I don't know.
She's not really my type.
Oh, no, it wouldn't work.
Me and regret, it would not work.
Yeah, but maybe that's why it would work.
That's why it's, yeah.
It'd be a whirlwind.
Exactly.
Opposites of tracks.
It's not the woman you marry, but it's, you know, it's your crazy ex.
I can't imagine having to fling with breath.
It doesn't really work, would it?
She doesn't seem like a laugh.
She doesn't seem like a laugh.
No.
She doesn't seem like a goer.
No.
She's the opposite.
More a slower.
Slower.
So Humo sapiens are the only human species left.
Now, the Ice Age ends or starts because of a cataclysm.
This is all Graham Hancock.
We'll get into Graham Hancock in the next episode,
where we will be joined by a caveman.
We've defrosted a caveman.
defrosted a early sapiens and we'll be joined by him in our next episode we will deal with
what happens next in the human story we go it starts quickening up a bit it starts to speed
up yeah um we go from uger to booger um part two from uga to bugger the caveman story
part two of us who is on prehistoric man is already on our patreon yeah uh where for three
pounds a month uh you can also devolve yeah you can uh go down the term many
Many of them are, many of them are homo erectus.
Did you skip the food chain?
How about go backwards?
Yeah, go back down the food chain.
Many of our patrons will die by being eaten by someone else.
That episode is already on a patron.
And we also do Friday bonus episodes.
This one, Stonehenge.
What really happened?
Why is it there?
And how has it meant that the AA303 is now absolutely log jammed?
Fascinating stuff.
Thanks for checking in.
We'll see you next time for more Uga-Bugger.
Oog!
Ughabuga, ogga, ogga, ogga, ogga, buga.
Are you tired of starting your day with pointless political arguments, superficial summaries and lukewarm hot takes on the radio?
Then switch to the bunker, where we look at the news.
News without the nonsense.
Every weekday morning, the bunker brings you a brand new, in-depth look at just one story.
From the chaos in Washington to the seismic political shifts in the UK to business, economics, history and pop culture.
Or start your week, our essential Monday morning roundup of the week's upcoming stories.
Week up through the noise to bring you what matters.
That's the bunker, news without the nonsense every weekday.
With me, Andrew Harrison, Ross Taylor, Jacob Jarvis, Gavin Esler, Zinging.
And me, Seth.
Find us wherever you get your podcasts.
