Financial Feminist - 257. This Mistake Cost Me $500,000

Episode Date: October 14, 2025

It took me three years — and more than half a million dollars — to learn this lesson. In today’s episode, I’m breaking down the biggest business mistake I’ve ever made: ignoring my gut, following “expert” advice, and paying the price. We’re diving into what happens when you give away your power for credibility, why trusting yourself is the best business strategy, and how to rebuild self-trust after a big mistake. If you’ve ever been told, “That’s just how it’s done,” this episode will remind you that sometimes the best thing you can do is trust your instincts — even when it goes against the norm. You’ll learn: Why “industry standard” doesn’t always mean right for you The true cost of outsourcing your power How to rebuild self-trust in your money and business decisions In this episode: 00:00 — The mistake that cost me $500,000 03:00 — What it means to sign with an agency or network (and why it’s risky) 05:00 — Losing transparency and control in my own business 07:00 — When credibility costs more than it’s worth 08:30 — The moment I realized I’d given away 40% of my revenue 10:00 — The danger of doing things just because “that’s how it’s done” 13:30 — What running everything in-house has taught me 14:00 — The deeper lesson: self-trust, transparency, and ownership 16:00 — How to support independent creators and shows like this one 17:00 — Learning from mistakes without shame 17:30 — The challenge: where can you trust yourself more? Want more resources from this episode, like our FREE money quiz, tools, or challenges? Head to https://www.herfirst100k.com/ffpod Check us out on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/herfirst100k Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It took me three years to learn what I'm telling you in this episode, and it cost me over half a million dollars. And today, I'm teaching you how to avoid it in just 20 minutes. Let's get into it. So let me tell you what happened. We have to start at the beginning. I hear it's a very good place to start. This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. One of the biggest things I hear from people who want to be business owners is they don't know where to start. They're like, I don't know what to do. I'm so overwhelmed. I want to start this business, but I need a logo and I need Brosepherson. and they make a million excuses to prevent them from getting started because they're too afraid of failure. They're too afraid of their business failing. And I've done the research for you. Squarespace. Squarespace is what you need to start that business finally. Squarespace was the first investment I made in my business way back in 2016 and they make it so easy for you to get a custom

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and HD cameras with night vision. No. And you set up credit card transaction alerts a secure VPN for a private connection and continuous monitoring for our personal info on the dark web. I'm looking into it. Stress less about security.

Use security solutions from TELUS for peace of mind at home and online. Visit TELUS.com slash total security to learn more. Conditions apply. So her first 100K, this global multi-seven figure business that I own, was not a global multi-seven figure business even five years ago. Her first 100K was just a side hustle. It was the side hustle I was doing in addition to my 9 to 5 in marketing. And in late 2019, around this time actually in 2019, I quit my job to run her first 100K full-time. Financial Feminist, the podcast that you're listening or watching to right now didn't even exist. I did not have a New York Times best-selling book. I barely even had a team. But as the business started to grow in 2020, 2021, I was going viral

on TikTok. We were gaining millions of followers after Financial Feminists season one was released. If you've been listening that long, you know that in 2021, we released over a I think six or eight weeks, the first 12 episodes of the show. It was our test. It was our test to see if the show was working, if people were going to respond to it. And not only did they respond to it, it changed my entire life. From the time the first episode dropped to 48 hours later, we were the number one business podcast in the world. We also were the only women-hosted women-focused show in the business charts, not only for that period, that like one or two weeks, but for the next year and a half. And I don't think we left the top 20 of the charts with just

12 episodes. So as the show started getting more traction, especially after we debuted that first season, and it was so successful, we got a lot of emails. We got a lot of phone calls. Agency's wanted to rep us. Of course they did. We were on top of the world. We were reviving. We were the only women-focused women-hosted show in the top 40 business podcasts. We were continually beating a ton of very well-known podcasters for a show that only had 12 episodes that was recorded with a $99 Amazon mic. I was told by not just the agents that wanted to work with me, but by every other deal I could see with every other well-known podcast that I admired, that you needed to get an agent and you need to, a podcast network. Now, what a podcast network is, is a network of podcast. No, but it's basically, it's all the ones you've heard of, like Sirius XM or Iheart or Wondry or Sony. And what they do is

they have these different hosts and these different podcasts in their orbit, and they are in theory cross-promoting the shows, right? So if you listen to, I don't know, an episode of Armchair expert, you're also going to hear an ad, for example, about Monica Lewinsky's show, both of which are on Wondry. The appeal was signing with a podcast agency is that there's some credibility in that, right? Saying like, oh, I have this big agency behind me, right? I'm a serious XM show. The second thing is that sometimes those agencies are going to offer you studio time, sometimes at a cost and sometimes for free, they're going to be able to maybe get you better guests on the show because there's more credibility. But the biggest reason to sign with

one is that they're going to help you monetize your show. Now, monetization looks different depending on the podcast, but for most podcasts, the biggest way they make money is the ads, right? And you've heard them on the show when we talk about Squarespace or talk about quince or talk about Indeed, right? That is how we make money for an otherwise free for you product. Now, other people sometimes do tours or they do patrons or they do merch, right? There's other ways to monetize the show. But by and large, that is the biggest way that people monetize their podcast in order to not only hopefully make a little bit of profit, but pay for the cost of producing said show. This podcast, for example, very transparently, costs us anywhere from like $350,000 to $400,000 a

year to produce. That's not cheap. That's a lot of money. That is to pay and compensate people fairly. That is for studio time when we host in person. That is for equipment and flights to different events. Lawyers to look at our contracts, right? The biggest reason to sign with one of these bigger networks or agencies is that they're going to hopefully help you make money. Now, they helped us make money. That's true. But there was a lot of problems with signing with an agency for us. The first one is transparency. We were not in direct communication with our ad sponsors. They were the middleman. We not only went through our agent, but went through our agent then our podcast agency when dealing with partners. We were not in direct contact

with Squarespace, for example. So we weren't brokering our own deals. Everybody at seems has a podcast now. And a lot of people sign with an ad agency because they're like, I don't want handle the business side of it. I'll let them broker the deals. But when you are actually somebody who wants to have control over her own business, wants to make strategic business decisions, is good at making those strategic business decisions, it's difficult to not know what's going on and to also have that lack of transparency impact the day-to-day of the business, but also the listener experience for you. Because the second thing that happened is these podcast agencies sell their ads as inventory. So they'll say, hey, we have six podcasts with inventory. Do you want to

buy slots on all six? And they sell them as like groups. They sell them as blocks. So rather than maybe cherry picking a great podcast with a certain listenership that's going to be very aligned with that brand, they might just say all of these podcasts are going to work with this brand. And this is the inventory we have. Now, there's issues with that, of course. One is that if you don't like a brand, you don't make money. We turn down a remarkable amount of money because we only want to work with brands that we believe in, brands that are actually going to provide value to your life. And that would piss off ad networks because they didn't make money when we turned down deals, even if it was the right thing to do for us. That decision affected their business too.

Ultimately, so many people work with agents. There's really nice agents out there. I really genuinely like the agency and the agents we worked with. I also had largely good experiences with the podcast networks that we chose to sign those seven-figure podcast deals with. However, this is where it gets expensive. Agencies take up to 30% of your podcast revenue. That is on top of the 10% you pay to an agent. Now, all of this is going to feel really inside baseball, but we love financial transparency on this show.

And for someone who listens to this show, even semi-regular, I think it's important to know how we make money and also how damaging it can be to do all of the right things. We are getting 40% of our revenue to other people. This is pretty common if you're in media. If you're an actor, it's similar. You're giving a percentage to your agent and to your business manager and to a publicist and to a lawyer. Like, this is pretty standard. And this is unfortunately something that is not discussed enough because, yeah, I may have signed a seven-figure podcast deal and that is great. But overnight, my money gets cut by 40%. The other thing is that when performance of our podcast shifted from its norm, whether it was

underperforming around holidays or overperforming some other time, usually like the new year, they had a set amount of money that they were paying to us from the brands based on the performance that they had projected. If the performance did not align, that led to overstocking our show with ads. If you've been listening in the last year, you know that we have eight to ten ads on every single episode. I will go on record. That is too many ads. That was not my decision. It is changing now. We are still going to run ads. We still have to afford to run this show and to produce this show. But that was a poor listener experience. We didn't have a choice in that. And finally, the third thing with all of this is that we were told it was the right business decision. Not just

from a financial standpoint, not just from a profit standpoint, but from a credibility or made it standpoint. It feels sometimes in this and many industries, then unless you have a certain title, unless you know certain people, unless somebody well-known is backing you, you are not legitimate. You can't get into certain rooms or get certain deals or make certain money without those people or that structure backing you. So that's what we did. I didn't trust my own gut, which was like, you know, okay, I think I can do this myself. I think we can grow this show ourselves. And when things started getting weird, I kept thinking, no, but this is, this is the way people do it. This is the way podcasts are run. And you feel this way too. You feel this way a lot.

You feel this way when somebody tells you that you need a financial advisor to invest in the stock market because you're too stupid to do it yourself. Like, we get told this all the time, especially as women. And my not-so conspiracy conspiracy theory is that industries are built on making us feel like we're too stupid to understand. I am faced with this choice as a business owner all the time still, that you need to do certain things in order to be a legitimate business, in order to have the accolades, in order to be in the New York Times, in order to make a certain amount of money.

And some of that's true. Some of that's about who you know or who knows you or who is representing you. But I got to tell you, there is nobody better at representing me than me. There is nobody better at representing her first 100K than me. How could they be? I know this business, this brand, this mission inside and out. I know you all, maybe better some people. times than you know yourself. I know our community. I know our team. I know how to show up.

And when I didn't listen to my gut, when I didn't listen to what I knew would be most successful for us, not what everybody else always did, but what would be most successful for us, it was a poor business decision. It lost us a lot of money. The realization we had is that we lost over half a million dollars that could have stayed in our business. That's half a million dollars that could have gone to our team members, could have gone in our savings, could have gone to charitable giving, could have been reinvested into expanding the show. It is so easy to feel this sense of frustration and shame when you're overriding your gut because you're being told, that's just how it's done. That's what happens. You hand over your power to somebody else. This system works,

especially for people who are celebrities or influencers who don't want to manage the business part of the podcast. But that's not me. That's not me. I didn't want to just show up on a microphone and record for an hour. I care about you all. And I care about providing education. And I also care about our team and creating this podcast into not only a valuable and important part of listeners' lives, but also a profitable thing. We want to be able to think long-term about the future of this show. So what are we doing differently? Well, we're running everything podcast in-house now, which is honestly a celebration. It's a massive moment for us. It is, again, a little inside baseball. You might not know why that's a big deal. Most podcasts, I would say 98% of them do not run

their production, their legal, their ad sales in-house, meaning that it is our team at her first 100K managing all of that. We do not have an agency involved. We do not, we're not on a podcast network anymore. We are doing everything ourselves, which means we get to call a lot of the shots. Not every shot, but a way bigger amount of the shots now than we did before. This is our way that we're building internal processes. We are building team trust. We are building transparency with you all. But also, we are able to decide, no, that's too many ads. Or, no, we want to take some time off and respect our team's time and give me a break. This is such a parallel to so much of what we get asked from you all, which is, how do I own my choices? How do I own my decisions?

How do I find a way to not only trust my gut, but to build self-trust in my financial choices, in my career choices, in my relationship choices? This is me building my own self-trust. This is me building self-trust in my team. And this is us continuing to be transparent. and build trust with you all. We are an independent podcast now. The vast majority of podcasts that you listen to are not independent podcasts. And we are really proud of that decision,

but we also really need your support now more than ever. This is where, if you are listening to this show and aren't subscribed, which the vast majority of you are, the easiest thing you can do to make sure this show continually gets produced, that it continues to be valuable and transparent and useful to you is just by hitting a simple button.

Wherever you're listening or watching right now, hitting subscribe is going to help us more than you know. Sharing the show with friends, leaving us five-star reviews. These are the kind of things that allow us to show up. Imagine we are your local independent bookstore because for all intents and purposes, that's kind of the best metaphor. We are competing with Amazon, actually quite literally because Amazon, owns Wondery. We are literally competing with multi, multi, multi, multi, multi billion dollar behemoth

Amazon. This is where we need your support. We need your business. We need your listenership. We need you talking about us with friends. We need you subscribing. That would be so, so helpful. If you've ever gotten an ounce of value from this show, this is how you can support us in this journey. Learn from my mistake. Learn from my half a million dollar mistake. And I also want to be transparent to show you that even somebody that you might turn to for advice and guidance and see as an expert continually makes mistakes. Does things that she knows now were not the right call. They were the right call at the time. And now I have more information. And Maya Angelou always says, when you know better, you do better. So my prompt for you, what is one area where you can get more

curious, more present, and to take more ownership starting today? Maybe that's with your debt. maybe that's with your taxes. Maybe that's with your plan to get where you want to be both financially, emotionally, psychologically, physically in the next year. Mistakes are part of this journey. What matters is that you don't keep making the mistake because you're too afraid of the upheaval in your life. It would have been very easy for myself and our podcast producer Kristen and the rest of our team

to just keep doing what we were doing. We could have said, you know what? It's not completely broken, so why fix it? But we frankly just got tired of somebody else controlling our life. We got tired of other people telling us what we could and couldn't do. I need you to get tired of people telling you what you can and can't do. What matters is that you learn from your mistakes and you focus on how you can grow. So do not blindly follow industry advice.

do not check out of your money. Don't build your life on land that somebody else owns and expect that they're going to care about the house you're building more or as much as you do. Learn from our mistakes. And this is the time, especially while the world is a mess and Donald Trump hates shows and media like ours where we need your support.

Other feminist companies and shows need your support. Learn from our mistakes. support the kind of companies you want to see more of. We appreciate you being here. Thank you for listening to Financial Feminist, a Her First 100K podcast. For more information about Financial Feminist, Her First 100K, our guests and episode show notes, visit Financial Feministpodcast.com. If you're confused about your personal finances and you're wondering where to start, go to Her First100K.com slash quiz for a free personalized money plan. Financial Feminist is hosted by me, Tori Dunlap.

Houston Fields and Tamisha Grant, research by Sarah Shortino, audio and video engineering by Alyssa Midcast, marketing and operations by Karina Patel and Amanda Lafue. Special thanks to our team at her first 100K, Caitlin Sprinkel, Mascha Bach-McGieva, Sasha Bonar, Ray Wong, Elizabeth McCumber, Darrell Ann Ingman, Shelby Duclose, Megan Walker, and Jess Hawks. Promotional graphics by Mary Stratton,

photography by Sarah Wolfe, and theme music by Jonah Cohen Sound. A huge thanks to the entire her first 100K community for supporting our show. If you love financial feminist and you're listening, so I hope you do, we've got something to take your learning even deeper from the podcast, especially if you've ever felt like personal finance is a confusing maze. My book, Financial Feminist, Overcome the Patriarchy's bullshit to Master Your Money and Build a Life you love, is out now.

It is a New York Times bestseller that has sold nearly 300,000 copies, and it is not just another financial guide. It's everything you need to get better with money. step by step, but through the signature feminist lens that you know and love here at her first 100K. There is so much in the book that we've never discussed on the podcast. There are homework assignments. There are deep dive lessons and there's even more information that you've never heard it here on the show. You can get a copy of financial feminist wherever you get your books. And if you're listening on Spotify right now and are a premium member, you can get the

audiobook read by me for free. You can get signed copies and learn where it's sold at her first hundredk.com slash ffpod. Let's make 2026 the year you get your financial shit together. Okay? So if you've ever thought, it's too late for me to figure this out, or my debt feels out of control, or just thinking about my money gives me major anxiety. And I know you've had one of those thoughts because you're listening to the show. You are not alone. That feeling of overwhelm, it is not your fault. It is baked in to a broken system that is meant to keep you stuck, playing small, and spinning your wheels.

But the good news is you do not have to stay stuck. I want to give you access to my incredible free workshop, the seven-day money reset. And just one week, this workshop will help you reset your money mindset. take control of your finances. Yes, even if you feel behind and start building a clear, actionable plan for your journey to your first 100K. This is where financial transformation begins. So don't just be a passive listener of this show. Take active ownership of your money. Together, we're going to tackle the mindset shifts and practical steps you need to feel confident about your money all in one shame-free zone. And it's totally free.

Head on over to her first hundredk.com slash ffod to sign up and take this exclusive training. See you there. Thank you.