First Date Follow Up - The Jubal Show - How did cosigning love ruin this first date!?

Episode Date: December 2, 2022

First Date Follow Up is when we get an email from someone who went on a date and the other person isn't calling back. We get that other person on the phone to see why they're "ghosting".How did cosigning love ruin this first date!?Leave a rating and review wherever you listen. It will help the show out in a big way. If that's not your thing, you can find us on social media here:https://instagram.com/thejubalshowhttps://twitter.com/thejubalshowhttps://www.tiktok.com/@thejubalshowSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hey, everyone. It's Katie Couric. Well, the election is in the homestretch, right in time for a new season of my podcast, Next Question. I'm bringing in some FOKs, friends of Katie's, to help me out, like Ezra Klein, Jen Psaki, Astead Herndon. But we're also going to have some fun, thanks to some of my friends like Samantha Bee and Charlemagne the God. We're going to take some viewer questions as well. I mean, isn't that what democracy is all about? Check out our new season of Next Question with me, Katie Couric, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show, Ears Edition podcast. Join late night legend Jon Stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines, exclusive extended interviews, and more. Now this is a second term we can all get behind. Listen to The Daily Show, Ears Edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to Decisions Decisions, the podcast where boundaries are pushed and conversations get candid. Join your favorite hosts, me, Weezy WTF, and me, Mandy B, as we dive deep into the world of non-traditional relationships and explore the often taboo topics surrounding dating,

sex, and love. That's right. Every Monday and Wednesday, we both invite you to unlearn the outdated narratives dictated by traditional patriarchal norms. With a blend of humor, vulnerability, and authenticity, we share our personal journeys navigating our 30s, tackling the complexities of modern relationships, and engage in thought-provoking discussions that challenge societal expectations. From groundbreaking interviews with diverse guests to relatable stories that will resonate with your experiences, Decisions Decisions is going to be your go-to source for the open dialogue about what it truly means to love and connect in today's world. Get ready to reshape your understanding of relationships and embrace the freedom of authentic connections. Tune in and join the conversation. Listen to Decisions Decisions on the Black Effect Podcast

Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The Jubal Show on demand. First date follow up. Tara is on the phone today for a first date follow up and Tara isn't getting a call back from a dude she went out with and his

name is Sam. Bummer. First of all, before we get into your date and stuff, thank you for your email. How long has it been since you went out with Sam? Gosh, it's been about a week. And he's ghosting ghosting you, or he hasn't responded to anything? He's definitely ghosting me,

because, I mean, I know this, because prior to the date, we've been texting pretty solid for a week. And so, I mean, it's pretty clear that I'm getting ghosted. And I just, I don't know why. And I feel really sad about it because I really liked him. How many times have you tried to get a hold of him since your date? I haven't gone overboard.

I've just sent a few texts, but not like all on the same day, you know? So I don't know, probably like, honestly, probably like four times, like a few texts, and then I finally called, but I didn't leave a voicemail. Okay. Why don't you tell us a little bit about the date then? Okay, so basically we met on Tinder, and Sam is in the same fraternity as my brother, who's like my best friend. So we kind of bonded over that

and the fact that they are in the same fraternity and just like their time in college Greek life in general. But yeah, I mean, we're both entrepreneurs. He works in real estate and I'm a hairstylist and I run like this small hair and eyebrows salon with a friend. So we had a lot in common. Yeah. Yeah. We had a lot in common in terms of like being self starters and having our own businesses and just being kind of go getters. But I mean, we really connected over kind of Greek life stuff and yeah, all that. And we talked about like business goals for the next 10 years.

It was just a really easy conversations. Yeah. And actually we like figured out that we grew up only an hour from each other, which was a really like small world. And yeah, the whole date was super fun. Actually, we would like went to one of those sip and paint parties. I've always wanted to go to one. Were you like drinking paint?

Yeah, exactly. Like a drunk Bob Ross. I've always wanted to go to one of those too, and then just get really drunk and then be an art critic. Yeah. And everybody's going to be like, wow, that is cool. I do not see the vision. It was super fun.

We had a really good time, and I thought that it was going to go somewhere. I mean, he waited for my Uber, and we didn't kiss goodnight, which was fine, because it would have been inappropriate. The Uber driver shows up, and then he makes out with me. It wasn't like that at all. It was just a sweet, chaste hug, but there was affection there. I'm so confused. Okay. We do these all the time, and people always call and say but there was, like, affection there. Like, I'm so confused. Okay. Yeah, we do these all the time, and people

always call and say, like, I don't know, the date just seemed to go really good, but I want to, your date does seem like a really good date. I don't know, it sounds like the date really, like, started and, you know, became fun when you guys started sipping paint. Maybe he thought it was too much business at the beginning of the date.

Oh. Oh, i guess so i mean but i mean it just seemed like he was excited about it too it didn't seem like that like it seemed to me like it was something we had in common we're both like feeling passionate about yeah i mean i would think that would be exciting for him it's i mean it's cool when you have me someone that has similar interests especially i mean if you're a career type of person then it's awesome if you meet another person who seems motivated and driven in their career. Yep.

Exactly, right? Like, you know, we had that in common, and it was something, a bonding thing. And you don't know why he's ghosting you at all? I honestly have no clue. I've been, like, racking my brain going back through, like, what happened? What happened?

Did I miss something? And usually I'm really intuitive with these things, and it just felt very, it felt like a good day. Like I was like, that was a great date. Like for sure. We're going to go on a second date.

And I thought like, I'd get a call from him the next day and it's like nothing. He won't even respond to me. And it was just kind of like, it just seemed completely abnormal. I don't know what happened. That's the most annoying thing about going on a date that you think went well. You start overanalyzing yourself.

Like what's wrong? What did I do wrong? I know. Yeah, exactly. Like, what's wrong? What did I do wrong? I know. Yeah, exactly. Like, what did I say? Did I smell? Did I forget to trim my ear hair? Right.

No, I mean, I know I didn't smell, so it's not that. I smelled good. I showered. I primped and all that stuff. Okay, well, we'll see if we can figure it out for you. We'll play a song, come back, and then call him and ask why he's ghosting with your first day of follow-up next.

It's the Jubal Show. Tara is on the phone, and Tara is getting ghosted by a dude named Sam. And everybody wants Sam to not be ghosting her because Tara and Sam is a really good couple name. And they had a good date. And they did have a good date. They went out for a sip and paint. They painted and they sipped. And then he waited for the Uber with her.

There was no kiss at the end of the date because they didn't want to be making out in front of the Uber driver, which is really weird. Terry, you should try that sometime. It's really exciting. I agree. Yeah. I don't know about that. I don't know that they would appreciate that. Maybe they'd drive off or something.

Oh, trust me. They like it. Automatic five star. Yeah. They like it. Yeah. That could be a whole show, right? Now Sam's ghosting her and Tara has no idea why.

It's been a week since she's heard anything from him. And one of the things that she really liked was that they both bonded over the fact that they own businesses. And I don't know, Tara, you really can't think of any reason that this guy is ghosting you? I cannot think of one reason. I honestly can't. Okay. Well, we'll see if we can figure it out. I'm going to dial his phone number right now, okay?

Yeah, sure. Hello, this is Sam. Hello, this is Jubal from The Jubal Show. And Christian Grace. No. And Bennett. Sam, we're calling you because we got an email about you from somebody who listens to the show and they wanted us to give you a phone call.

Mm-hmm. Okay, all right. We do a segment on the show called The First Date Follow-Up. That's where if you go out with someone on a date and then you end up ghosting them, that person that got ghosted can email us to get you on the phone and ask why you're ghosting them. And we got an email about you from someone that you went on a date with recently. Is it Tara? You are a winner.

Yes, it's Tara. Tara wanted us to call you. So Tara told us about your date. She said she really liked you and she thought that you guys had an amazing date. She can't think of any reason that you'd be ghosting her, but apparently you are. And she wants to know why. Can you tell us? Do you mind? Yeah, we did have, we did have a good date. I don't know what she told you about it, but like we seem to get along really well. I really liked her. She's very attractive. Just get a good personality, fun. She said that like like it's one of the best dates she's been on ever

because especially like you guys, I guess, you both own businesses and stuff, and she thought that was cool. Yeah, we definitely bonded over that. And I had a really good time on the date too. I guess for me there was just like one little thing that turned me off. And just in the conversation, at one point, she mentioned something about her parents co-signing for her for some sort of business loan. And I don't know, it just turned me off a little bit when I felt like, oh, okay, so her parents are

just kind of helping her and giving her money and doing all this stuff for her. But just because someone does have a helping hand along the way doesn't make necessarily running a business easy. I mean, you have to admit that, you know, owning a business has to be horribly hard. So even if she has money from her parents, she's still making it happen. I don't know. Maybe I'm being too judgmental. It was just all I can do is kind of go with my feelings.

And I don't know. When I heard that, I was all I can do is kind of go with my, my feelings. And I, I don't know when I heard that, I was just like, eh, it just kind of turned me off a little bit. Okay. So that, and that was the moment you decided that you were not going to call her back was when you found out that her parents helped her with her loan or whatever. Yeah. I don't know if that was the moment, but I just, I got home afterwards and I started thinking about it and it just, I think at this point I should just let it go. It's kind of in my head and it's been a week or so since our date. And, you know, like you guys said, I've ghosted her. I haven't communicated with her. I know she sent me a couple of text messages and I saw that she tried to call me one time and never left a message. So it's probably

best just to let go. Okay. Well, can't let it go just yet because Tara's actually on the phone and wants to talk to you. You guys didn't tell me she was on the phone. Thanks a lot. I'm sure this won't be awkward now. Hi. I heard all that and that whole thing about like trust fund baby and acting like I'm some privileged person is completely off base.

Like I've worked my butt off just like you did to start my business. And I barely even mentioned that cosigning thing. And they're not cosigners on my business. It was more like if I decide to expand and do another location, I may need them as a cosigner, but not because I need the money, but because I have to show, you know, that I have a backup plan. It has nothing to do with like my parents giving me money. They've never given me money. Everything that I've done has been on my own. And that's a pretty big assumption that you made.

And the fact that you didn't even like tell me that that was going on, you just decide to ghost me after what I felt like was a really nice time. I don't know. I just like that rubs me the wrong way. And you're like a, you're a real estate agent and that's great. Good job. You worked really hard to get where you are, but I made my own business. Like that is a lot different. Do you know how hard it is to have a small business like a salon? That is not easy. And you're saying you're acting all high and mighty, like as if you, you know,

your shit doesn't stink. Like you're just like the best thing since, you know, ice cream. And that sucks for me because you don't even know me. Like we went on one date and you're making all these assumptions about me and you don't even have the to like essentially say something about it on the date in a way that's maybe you know you could have said something to me or ask more questions you just made this wild assumption and then like ghosted me that's not that's not integrity that's not you know like you're put me in my place, Tara. Okay, well, if that's what you want, I can do that some more.

You want me to keep going? I'll keep going if you want. No, no, for real. That was, I mean, I love a strong woman and that was awesome how you just stood up for yourself. And, and maybe I was a little judgmental and, you know, I, I could have been wrong. Like you may, it's not judgmental. Like judgmental is like being right about something and having an opinion about it, you know, and judging me for that. You're totally off base. No, Tara, you're right. I was wrong. I shouldn't have made those assumptions about you. I guess I misheard a little bit what you said and I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions.

So look, I'm sorry. You're awesome. That's great that you're doing all this, and I totally, totally respect that. I mean, I appreciate you saying that you're sorry, and I do like to give people, you know, the benefit of the doubt. I don't know what was going on for you that day, but, yeah, sometimes we make the wrong, you know, the benefit of the doubt. I don't know what was going on for you that day, but yeah, sometimes we make the wrong, you know, people make the wrong impressions and you make mistakes. So thank you. I appreciate your, I do appreciate your, your apology. And, um, sounds like, you know, who I am now. So that's good. Sam, would you like to go out with Tara again on another date? We'll pay for it.

Oh, uh, yeah, I would totally go out on another date with her now. I don't know. Can I take some time to think about it? Do I have to make some decision right now at the second? Well, can you please make a decision right now? Because I'd really like to see you again. Okay, I will give you one. Okay. I will, I'll give you one, one last chance. Um,

I, I'm going to put my ego aside and I'm, I'm going to go ahead and start fresh. All right. Well, Sam, you got a date, Tara,

you get Sam and Sam gets another shot and we'll send you guys out and pay for it. And Sam, I can tell why you're good at selling houses. Wow. Whatever you're selling, we're buying. Yeah. No, I'm glad you guys, I'm glad you guys helped me. This, this is awesome. I can't wait to see you again, Tara. Oh, thanks. I'm looking forward to it too. Y'all have fun. Bye. The Jubal Show on demand. Hey, everyone. It's Katie Couric. Well, the election is in the homestretch right in time for a new season of my podcast, Next Question.

I'm bringing in some FOKs, friends of Katie's, to help me out, like Ezra Klein, Jen Psaki, Astead Herndon. But we're also going to have some fun fun thanks to some of my friends like Samantha Bee and Charlemagne the God. We're going to take some viewer questions as well. I mean, isn't that what democracy is all about? Check out our new season of Next Question with me, Katie Couric, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Join late night legend John Stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines, exclusive extended interviews and more. Now, this is a second term we can all get behind.

Listen to The Daily Show Ears Edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to Decisions Decisions, the podcast where boundaries are pushed and conversations get candid. Join your favorite hosts, me, Weezy WTF, and me, Mandy B, as we dive deep into the world of non-traditional relationships and explore the often taboo topics surrounding dating, sex, and love. That's right. Every Monday and Wednesday, we both invite you to unlearn the outdated narratives dictated by traditional patriarchal norms. With a blend of humor, vulnerability, and authenticity, we share our personal journeys navigating our 30s, tackling the complexities of modern relationships,

and engage in thought-provoking discussions that challenge societal expectations. From groundbreaking interviews with diverse guests to relatable stories that will resonate with your experiences, Decisions Decisions is going to be your go-to source for the open dialogue about what it truly means to love and connect in today's world. Get ready to reshape your understanding of relationships and embrace the freedom of authentic connections. Tune in and join the conversation. Listen to Decisions Decisions on the Black Effect Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.