First Date Follow Up - The Jubal Show - There's an important lesson in this First Date Follow Up!

Episode Date: February 23, 2022

First Date Follow Up is when we get an email from someone who went on a date and the other person isn't calling back. We get that other person on the phone to see why they're "ghosting".How do you know that you are on the wrong dating app!? There's plenty of ways! You can listen to this because someone's on the completely opposite dating app in this First Date Follow Up! Leave a rating and review wherever you listen. It will help the show out in a big way. If that's not your thing, you can find us on social media here:https://instagram.com/thejubalshowhttps://twitter.com/thejubalshowhttps://www.tiktok.com/@thejubalshowSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hey, everyone. It's Katie Couric. Well, the election is in the homestretch, right in time for a new season of my podcast, Next Question. I'm bringing in some FOKs, friends of Katie's, to help me out, like Ezra Klein, Jen Psaki, Astead Herndon. But we're also going to have some fun, thanks to some of my friends like Samantha Bee and Charlemagne the God. We're going to take some viewer questions as well. I mean, isn't that what democracy is all about? Check out our new season of Next Question with me, Katie Couric, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show, Ears Edition podcast. Join late night legend Jon Stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines, exclusive extended interviews, and more. Now this is a second term we can all get behind. Listen to The Daily Show, Ears Edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to Decisions Decisions, the podcast where boundaries are pushed and conversations get candid. Join your favorite hosts, me, Weezy WTF, and me, Mandy B, as we dive deep into the world of non-traditional relationships and explore the often taboo topics surrounding dating,

sex, and love. Every Monday and Wednesday, we both invite you to unlearn the outdated narratives dictated by traditional patriarchal norms. Tune in and join the conversation. Listen to Decisions Decisions on the Black Effect Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The Jubal Show on demand. First date follow-up. Mandy emailed us for a first date follow-up. Apparently, she went out with a dude named Vinny,

and now Vinny is doing what Vinny's do. What do they do? Not calling her back. Aw, Vinny. Kind of a standard Vinny move, I think. Mandy, before we get into how you met Vinny and your date and why you think he's not calling you back, when is the last time you talked to Vinny?

It was about three weeks ago. Three weeks ago. That's quite a while. And how many times have you tried to reach out to him? A couple of times. I've, you know, tried to reach out and just got nothing back. Where'd you meet him?

We met on Tinder first. We talked for a little bit and then we decided to meet up at a bar. Okay, so you met him on Tinder. And how long did you guys talk on Tinder before you actually went out? I would say probably two or three weeks. Oh, wow. That's a while.

And, you know, kind of made sure that we were on the same page about things, you know, before meeting up and thought it was a good idea. So you went to a bar, you said, for your first date? Yes. Did you meet him there or did he pick you up? I met him there. So you guys went to a bar. Tell us about it. Yeah. So we went to the bar. You know, we had a couple of drinks. I was, you know, kind of like, I don't know, I was nervous. It was my first time out since COVID

started. And it was my first time just meeting somebody at a bar and having a real life in person date. So other than it being interesting, being your first time just meeting somebody at a bar and having a real life in person date. So other than it being interesting being your first time out since quarantine, how was the date with Vinny? I mean, it was okay. I guess I was, you know, some things that he said just didn't quite fit quite right. But I mean, I thought, you know, maybe he'd still talk to me afterwards. You said some things he said didn't sit right? Um yeah I guess I don't know it was just a little odd so we had discussed some things prior like

you know our backgrounds and stuff like that and when I brought up religion when we had talked about it online he didn't really have much to say about it or whatnot so I thought that we were kind of on the same page of not very religious. I grew up with some of it, but kind of, I don't know, got tired being forced to go to church by my parents. So when I was an adult, I never went. And that's kind of my thing. Okay.

So you're a thinner. You're just a dirty, rotten thinner. If you believe in that kind of thing, sure. All right. So, yeah. So then he mentioned that for Easter, like Passover time, that he had to do this whole fasting thing and that he couldn't eat for a couple of days. And then they, because there was a ceremony with him and his family that they all had to attend to. And I,

you know, I wasn't, I'm not sure like the whole scoop of the story, but that's like kind of right up the alley with the Jehovah's Witness type of thing. Right. And so I thought that was, you know, like me, like, oh, we kind of grew up with that. But he still was saying that he did that this year. Okay. So it sounds like he's pretty hardcore religious, maybe? I don't know. That's the only part of the date that I can think of because I was just a little surprised by it when he was telling me.

Like, I'm okay with it. I just, I didn't know that that was part of it. So I guess my initial reaction was kind of a little shocked. Okay. So maybe he brought up his religion and you're like, ew. That could turn somebody off if they're a religious person. That's the only thing I can think of that kind of went a little awry was just I was a little taken back by that he was fasting and had this kind of very big ceremonial thing going on. So I guess I was just, I don't know, very confused why somebody would starve themselves. I don't know.

How did the date end? Well, we just like we I mean, we had a good time. We were laughing and carrying on and stuff like that. And then it just kind of got late. He had to work in the morning. So we kind of, you know, ended early. We did have a good hug and everything at the end of the night, which is a good first date thing. do this again, you know, soon or whatnot. But it wasn't really like, yes, next Friday at this time. It was just very casual kind of, you know, we'll talk about the next time we're free and we'll do this again. And you haven't heard from him for three weeks. So maybe maybe he's fasting like from his phone, like from his phone. He went to Indonesia and is in a cave right now, fasting and not using his phone.

Very wishful thinking. Yeah, it might be. A social fast. We'll play a social fast. Exactly. We'll play a song and then come back and call him

and see if we can figure it out for you, okay? Okay. I hope he answers. All right. Hold on one second. It's a Jubal show. You know what, Mandy?

Yeah? You're on the phone for a first date follow-up. I know you already know that, but I'm just saying that. You're on the phone for a first date follow-up. You want to call this dude named Vinny'm just saying that. You're on the phone for a first date follow-up. You want to call this dude named Vinny who's been ghosting you.

You guys went to a bar. You said you had a fun time. You said the only awkward thing was when you got into a conversation about religion because I guess he's super religious and it freaked you out. And so you thought that maybe your reaction was judgmental when you were really just asking questions about him fasting. Got that all out. I really want you to get a second date with him though.

Yeah, me too. And the only thing you can think of and the only reason that he's not calling you back is maybe that your reaction to him talking about fasting and stuff for religion was a little too, it seemed too harsh when actually you were really interested in it. Yeah. Yeah. I guess I can't control my face. Okay.

Control my face. I'll call him now and see if we can figure it out for you. All right. Okay. That'd be great. Okay. Control my face. I'll call him now and see if we can figure it out for you, all right? Okay. That'd be great. Thanks. Here we go. Hello?

Hi, may I speak to Vinny, please? Yeah, I'm Vinny. Hello, I'm Vinny. I'm Jubal. I'm Alex Fresh. Hey. I'm Englishny. I'm Jubal. I'm Alex Fresh. Hey. I'm English Evans. And this is The Jubal Show. The what show?

The Jubal Show. It's a radio show. Welcome. Oh, okay. We're calling because we're a radio show, and we do a segment on our show where if you go out on a date with someone and they don't call you back after, they can email us to get you on the phone and find out what happened and that's why we're calling. We got an email about you

from someone who listens to us. Oh, is it from Mandy? That was quick. Normally people are like, oh my god, who is it? You're just like, very matter of fact. I don't go on dates that much. Why are you not calling Mandy back? I just don't think we're going to work out.

We're just two different kind of people with different lifestyles. Different lifestyles. So maybe the reason that Mandy thinks you're not calling her back is the truth. Can I tell you what she told us and then you confirm or deny? Yes, yes, of course. She told us how you guys met on Tinder. She said that you guys went out to a bar, had a really fun time. She also mentioned that there was a moment where she thinks she might have seemed very judgmental about your religion

because you were talking about fasting or something like that. And she said that her face might have looked shocked at that, but not in a good way. And the truth is she was actually curious, but she thought she might have come off as like thinking you were weird for that did you did you do that did you did you pick up on that yeah I mean I just didn't I just could tell after that conversation that um you know I sometimes I feel like a freak when I bring up the you know some of the things like just some you know just would like the traditions me and my family do for religion and especially modern dating. It gets exhausting. I can see it on their face.

I start telling them like about what I, you know, what I'm kind of about, you know. Do you feel embarrassed by it? just let down, just kind of fatigued by the whole process of just, you know, getting your hopes up and then telling them about, you know, your, uh, your values or kind of, you know, what your, what your reality is like. And then you can see them. It feels like there, you can see them pull away. Well, she's told us that she wasn't judging you. She was like actually cool with it. She said she was just very interested in your beliefs, but she could also tell that it looked like she was judging you.

I think she was shocked. She said, because shocked., because she didn't realize that you were that religious. Okay, yeah, I mean, we did meet on Tinder, so I can see where... Yeah, not exactly the religious hub of the world, Tinder. Yeah, it's not Christian Mingle, but I don't know. I just wanted to meet someone kind of modern and kind of Christian Mingle's a little bit Stone Age-ish, kind of Amish woman, kind of like that. But I should have maybe put something on my profile, you know what I mean, about my values. And I wasn't already feeling it.

When she chose a bar for the first date, I thought it would have been better, like something a little bit less. Okay, so you didn't even want to be in a bar. Do you drink? Sometimes, but not, I try not to drink. Okay.

I avoid it. And do you avoid it because of taste or you avoid it because of religion? Yeah, it's like a religious choice and sometimes, you know, I just don't think it's a good idea. But I did it because I made it seem nice, so I wanted to, you know,

I didn't want to just be a negative person right off the bat. She said it's been three weeks since you talked to her. Why couldn't you just like let her know, you know? I mean, I figured that she already moved on. Maybe like, you know, she had like already different guys ready. Different guys? Is that how Mandy seems? Yeah, I just figured like she had already like some guys lined up just because like, you know, she seemed like to be comfortable in bars and just the way that i noticed the way that

lifestyle goes and it's just uh i don't know she she drank she drank a lot she drank more than i did okay um i felt like you know just another number like for like it like another like knots on the bedpost for like a kind of another loose woman, you know? Wow. Wow. Oh, okay. Oh, hey, Vinny, I should let you know before Mandy goes in on you. She's actually on the line listening and wants to talk to you. It's going to be awkward.

Are you serious? Yes, I am. I probably should have told you that before you dropped that whole loose woman line. Yikes. Apparently going to a bar and having a few drinks and wanting to have an interaction with somebody just makes me like a loose woman now. That's just, you want like a modern woman, but not like, but not a modern woman.

But you should have thrown out the whole no drinking thing before we decided to go to a bar. Definitely should have thrown out the non-religion thing before you decided to meet up with somebody. You chose the bar and you knew the guy, like I saw you, like meet up with somebody. You chose the bar? You knew the guy? Like, I saw you. Like, you knew guys there? It's Tinder. 95% of the people that meet up, they go to bars.

That's what they do. It's a modern thing. I'm telling you, this is going to be, like, the last time I used Tinder. Yeah, I mean, for you, probably a better idea to not be on there if you don't want to meet Tinder people. You should probably find somebody who's into what you're into. Maybe meeting people at church or something is a better plan, because it's not going to work out this way, meeting people like this. Well, no one goes to church anymore, so it's kind of hard.

It's just all loose women now, apparently. That's the modern thing, so I guess... Look, Manny, I'm sorry that you had to hear that, but I just think you're a different kind of woman that I want. Your lifestyle is fine. I'm not for it.

So it's just hard to meet women in church, so I try to do Tinder, and I kind of knew this was going to happen just by your pictures you know oh wow wow did you want me to bring a rope so that I can help you jump to more conclusions like would that be better for you my pictures then you should have just passed on that one yeah if you could already tell that she was like a little too I don't know what the word is for you. Loose. Yeah, well, that's the word that Vinny used. A little too whatever.

If she wasn't your speed, Vinny, if you could already tell that, why even go on the date? Well, you know, I was just hoping maybe I can just help you, you know, kind of maybe change your mind on some things and then get you on the right path.

Get me on the right path? No, I have a path. I'm good. Well, let me ask. I think I know where this is going to go. I think I know where it's going, but I'm going to go ahead and ask anyway. Vinny, would you like to go on another date with Mandy? We'll pay for it.

Absolutely not. Didn't think so. All right. Bless you both. And better luck next time. Thank you. The Jubal Show on demand. Hey, everyone.

It's Katie Couric. Well, the election is in the homestretch right in time for a new season of my podcast. Next question. I'm bringing in some FOKs, friends of Katie's, to help me out, like Ezra Klein, Jen Psaki, Astead Herndon. But we're also going to have some fun, thanks to some of my friends like Samantha Bee and Charlemagne the God. We're going to take some viewer questions as well.

I mean, isn't that what democracy is all about? Check out our new season of Next Question with me, Katie Couric, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Join late-night legend Jon Stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines, exclusive extended interviews, and more. Now this is a second term we can all get behind.

Listen to The Daily Show Ears Edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to Decisions Decisions, the podcast where boundaries are pushed and conversations get candid. Join your favorite hosts, me, Weezy WTF, and me, Mandy B, as we dive deep into the world of non-traditional relationships and explore the often taboo topics surrounding dating, sex and love. Every Monday and Wednesday, we both invite you to unlearn the outdated narratives dictated by traditional patriarchal norms. Tune in and join the conversation. Listen to Decisions Decisions on the Black Effect Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.