F**kface - Apple Scrumpling Gang // Pavloved Your Ass [80]

Episode Date: December 8, 2021

Geoff, Gavin, and Andrew talk about the best trailer for the worst movie, being a Jackie Chan podcast, perfect moments in Mission: Impossible 3, Geoff's colonoscopy, and Andrew buys the merch. Want to contribute to bits? Email what you can do to [e-mail] Sponsored by Hello Tushy (http://hellotushy.com/face), ExpressVPN (http://expressvpn.com/face), and HelloFresh (http://hellofresh.com/face14 and use code face14). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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That's exciting. It's like a movie. Jeff, what is a trailer for a movie that you're like, this trailer looks fucking great, and then you saw the movie and you were disappointed? Hold on, I'm not recording. What the, what is? Great.

All right, who is actually recording at three? As soon as you joined. I was recording before three. It's three and I'm recording. It's three o'clock right now. You are late to the, no, it is not three on the dot. I think somehow being lost to join, I was the only one on time. Yes.

Hey, Gavin, 100% agree with you. Well, I mean, everybody is technically still on time because it's still three o'clock, but I was prepping the video. Everything. We were here not recording. Gavin is the one. Gavin is the one. Gavin is the one who was on time. Thank you, Gavin.

All right, fine. Who cares? The professional. Cool. Congratulations, Gavin. You're the professional. Thanks, man. We all hope to someday aspire to be like you.

You are quite possibly the pinnacle of what a podcaster could hope to achieve in terms of professionalism and talent, in terms of, I don't know, tone, effort, general demeanor. It really doesn't get better than you. So, Gavin, please show us how it's done. I wasn't the one saying it. I don't think he I think he already did. I think the act was done. He did show us how it was done by being on time. I don't think he... I think he already did. I think the act was done. He did show us how it was done by being on time. I don't think there's anything to go beyond that.

I think he did it. I know he was on time. I know he was on time because I was here when I saw him come in. That's true. I was also on time. I was prepping a video because I knew the size would be too big

to send you guys through Discord and it would be a whole kerfuffle in the middle of the episode. So I was sending in a different way while you guys were talking about Colin Quinn's film prowess. He knows a lot about movies. I was surprised.

Of course, Colin Quinn's a great guy. Very funny comedian. Very funny comedian. Also enjoyed his book. His specials are unique. He does more essays than I'd say traditional stand-up. It's fascinating. He tells more of their historical specials. Anyway, I'd say like traditional stand up. It's fascinating. Like he tells more of like their historical specials. But anyway, I want to know the trailer thing.

Jeff, do you have a great storyteller in general? Also, one of the best guests in the history of the Howard Stern show. He had a story about fucking a cat that you would not believe. He also had a story about fucking an old lady in a hallway and having her fall down and hit her head and leaving her there for dead. Wait. Yeah. He told on the Howard Stern show. Oh, like she's a little lady in a hallway and having her fall down and hit her head and leaving her there for dead. Wait, what? Yeah, he told her on the Howard Stern Show. Oh.

Like she fell and he ran us dead? He had sex with an old lady in a hallway, she fell and hit her head, and he felt bad and he left. And he has no idea what happened. Well, what if he accidentally killed her? I don't know. I guess then she's dead. And he's a murderer. Anyway, he knows a lot about film. He does. Hello and welcome to another episode of the F*** Face Podcast.

I believe this is episode 80, if I'm correct, which puts us, I want to say, in the back half of season two, year two. Is that correct? I think we've kind of gone over it. There's no real measuring system for what. Well, I think there is. We just need to sit down and figure it out. We're approaching a number of episodes that no one can pitch in baseball.

That's true. I think... What's the fastest pitch recorded? It's probably in like over 100. I want to say 102 or so. Really? I was going to guess like 110 would be my guess. I don't think that high. Has anyone thrown

one in a vacuum? What do you mean? Has anyone thrown one at a vacuum cleaner I don't understand like why why would they have done that well so there's no air resistance so you can throw it real fast oh okay that's I feel like you took some leaps there I wasn't I wasn't with you I was lost that's right I was thinking about I've never seen someone throw a vacuum there was a guy who got thrown out of the game, I want to say, or maybe he disagreed with, I think it was he disagreed with what was called a strike,

and then the coach started fighting with the umpire, and the player walked out of the field, went down, grabbed a garbage can, and then placed it behind the plate and pointed at the umpire and said, that's you, you're garbage. So there has been a garbage can on the field. I've never seen a vacuum on the field. You sent a clip to the group chat the other day about it was an American football game

where a guy kicked the football, but apparently it somehow never happened before. Well, no, I didn't send the clip. I feel like this is just you being, Eric sent the clip. You're getting confused. I sent a clip of a guy getting hit in the head with a football after a kick,

and then there was another kick discussion later that I don't think was a video. I thought Eric put something in the slack. Yeah, and we're talking about the Doug Flutie drop kick, is what we're talking about, I assume. Gavin didn't understand why that was. First of all, he's a throwing man, Gavin. He's not a kicking man. His job is to throw.

He's a quarterback. Very different skills. They're making it sound like it's the first time anyone had dropped the ball, bounced it off the floor and kicked it over the... Yeah, it was. It was in the modern NFL. It literally was. It's just not a thing that kick people do.

Why would you drop the ball and kick it? Especially if you're a quarterback. Nobody's prepared for that. Quarterbacks don't kick the ball. What was their way of doing it? The other team thought they were going to run with it but then he kicked it yeah i think the other team assumed because i think it was they positioned like they were going for two i'm not fully aware i'm just assuming and instead of actually running and like throwing the ball to score it they scored off of a drop kick which if you drop the ball down bounce and kick it between the uprights that's a point

so i think like nobody was prepared for the uprights, that's a point. So I think like nobody was prepared for the play because it's both a QB and they're in a position in which they would typically go for two. But they ran a play that would score one. But sometimes like if it's fourth down, they just kick it. Yeah, but it's first the kicker does it. It's the kicker's job and they don't kick it that way way. They have a guy that catches it and holds it and places it, and then the kicker just kicks it off the ground from the guy that's holding it.

And that's easier than bouncing it off the ground. I think it is. I think there's room for error if you're trying to purposely bounce the ball and kick it yourself. I feel like that's way harder. Yeah, for sure. I mean, it's a football.

It's not a sphere, man. You can't predict exactly how it's going to bounce. Plus, Lace has got to be out. Gavin, according to your favorite movie of all time, Lace is out. Lace is out. Lace is out. Also, it's just like a human tripod, essentially, is the other guy's job. Why would you remove the tripod?

It just stabilizes it for you. Nice and easy. Shape of the ball. They also, it's like a different sport. I don't know the rugby comparison. I think the balls are shaped differently too. The Hangover, Andrew. What about The Hangover?

It was a good trailer and it was a terrible movie. I liked the trailer a lot. I thought it was going to be funny and then I didn't like the movie at all. Really? Like you would say you hated The Hangover? Oh yeah. I don't understand the,

I don't understand why people like that film. I think the first one's quite good. Yeah, I enjoyed the first one. If I remember. Yeah. I haven't watched it since it came out. I don't first one's quite good. Yeah, I enjoyed the first one. If I remember. Yeah. I haven't watched it since it came out. I don't have really like

any interest in revisiting it, but... I got in an argument with Brandon Farmahini one time who told me at work who told me that it was the funniest movie

in like the last decade and was so full of jokes he didn't understand how I could not like it. So I asked him, tell me your favorite joke from the movie and he just looked at me

for about five minutes and then said, oh, walked away well yeah i think that's a terrible call to call it a joke like when i think of i agree i think it's something like naked gun i think of like those kind of like that where the joke per minute is absurd the hangover is like and i was kind of because it's a little bit of a mystery. It's a comedy. It kind of brought Mike Tyson back in a way. I will say there's a moment in the trailer that is funnier edited than it was in the movie. And that was the Mike Tyson, Phil Collins bit. Yes. Where in the trailer, it's like, do-do-do-do.

And then he socks him at the end of that. But in the movie, it's not as funny. I could, you know what I think the worst part of The Hangover was for me and this is like a very strange complaint they put out back on the 360 when random movies would come out that were big they would put out profile picture packs where it was just faces of the characters typically and there are people so many people use the baby there was a baby from the hangover as one of them and the people that did it thought they were really funny and i was just sick of it it was a popular gamer picture for a stretch of time the baby there was a baby from the hangover as one of them and the people that did it thought they were really funny and i was just sick of it it was a popular gamer picture for a stretch of time the baby with the glasses yours is danny devito what yours was dane devito what was for

what what movie was he no yours was oh yeah but i pulled that that was a choice i made that was that was a custom pull yeah i'm not hating necessarily on anyone that does that it's just there was a I don't know uh uh what's the word I'm looking for like a belief of calm I don't know I just don't if you I'm fine with you liking the hangover liking the hangover to the point where it's your gamer picture is is a step too far or I think it's an interesting choice we talked about this we talked about it briefly when we're playing halo but my most excited i was from a trailer to the least impressed i was with a movie was the tuxedo with jackie chan it's such a weird i was a teenager i was really loved rush hour i was getting into like oh like who am i rumble in the bronx like all of his early american type stuff

tuxedo came out i thought as a teenager i thought oh shit i was so excited i and i didn't see it at the cinema i bought it on dvd i was like i wasted my money on it wait did you purposely not i didn't know that you didn't did you not see it in theaters because you're like i'm gonna love this movie so much i'm gonna want to watch it multiple times. I'm going to save my money and buy it then. Why didn't you get to? I just didn't get to go that much when I was a kid. It's like, OK, it's like a big event when I went.

So I assume that's fine. I was busy seeing like Lord of the Rings and stuff to make it count. But it was like not even a rental scenario. You're like, I know I'm going to love this. I want the extra features. I bought it. It was probably like 15 quid on DVD. What a waste. scenario you're like i know i'm gonna love this i want the extra features i want everything it was probably like 15 quid on dvd my reaction was the same as yours i don't know gavin genuinely may have been the biggest like tuxedo fan based on trailer on the plant i don't think anyone may

have anticipated that movie more than gavin it's such a weird movie to be excited about i don't think jackie chan was bad in that either i think it was just not any good i feel like i very rarely would say that jackie chan was the problem of the thing that he was in i agree with that like i i can't think of a bet like wow jackie chan really fucked that movie up like when did jackie chan ever phone it in right i don't think yeah no i think consummate professional that jackie chan is the gavin free of movies he's the podcasting gavin i'll say it because we all know it's true he's the time the creme de la creme he's the he's the one that we all aspire to be as soon as gavin told me that i immediately went and watched the trailer for the tuxedo and watching it in the context of a match then gavin

watching it for the first time being like holy fuck this looks good was very funny they killed james brown for those who've never seen it i think the plot with the movie was that he gets jackie chan powers but from a suit and i think i remember that there's a water that makes people thirsty and that's all i can remember from that film so it's a james bond movie but not a james bond movie there's a guy that is like james bond and he's british but it turns out that all of his abilities come from his suit jackie chan is a taxi driver that befriends this guy i also haven't seen this movie in a long time so this could be completely wrong but i think

he befriends the guy and then somehow ends up with the suit because the guy dies uh and then he kills james brown and then jackie chain kills names james brown and they do a dance number because he has to perform instead of james brown because the suit has a bunch of abilities to it it's like a stealth suit but it also has like funky mode i feel like is what they display so he can like dance and perform i'm gonna be honest with you right now i haven't seen the movie since like the early 2000s. The way you're describing it, I really want to watch the movie. It sounds awesome. It sounds really good.

I went to watch it. I refused to pay $5 to rent it. I was going to do that last night and I was like $4.99. I can't do it. It was $3. I do it. But $5. Why don't we have a watch along?

We do watch long. I'd watch it in that context i just i forgot james brown was in it and that they weirdly kill james brown and then i wanted to go because in the trailer it happens it's like no way they actually do that it's an unfortunate thing where you go to the movie wiki and whoever wrote the plot synopsis deemed that scene not worth explaining. There is no mention of James Brown in the movie wiki for that thing. So if somebody watches the tuxedo, feel free to please include the James Brown section of that film from the wiki because he's listed

in the cast, but there is no mention of him in the plot breakdown of the tuxedo. It's a dumb movie. He made a lot of those movies. Do you remember The Medallion? That was one of those Jackie Chan era, not very good American. I know I've seen it.

I couldn't tell you anything about it. I don't think I've seen that one. Eric just said we're a Jackie Chan podcast. I'm okay with that. Jackie Chan, some great movies. Rush Hour, The Jackie Chan Adventures. Mr. Nice Guy. I would argue the greatest blooper reel of all time Rush

Hour 2 I think that's probably the greatest post-credit blooper reel in movie history where Chris Rock uh not Chris Rock damn it where Chris Tucker looks out the window he says damn he ain't gonna be in Rush Hour 3 I think that might be the funniest post like blooper line of all time I remember that killing that may have been the biggest laugh in the theater and that was a well-received movie i remember as a child watching that in a pack theater and that line killing myself included just is great line very funny blooper they don't do those anymore i feel like i once the last time you saw a blooper reel i think they're in all of jackie chan's films i will i think they're a staple. I watched the Tuxedo's blooper reel last night on YouTube.

I didn't watch the movie, but I at least watched that. You have to watch a Jackie Chan blooper. Jeff? I was waiting for this subject to change away from Jackie Chan. I'm not up to date on my Jackie Chan content, so I was just letting you guys go. Oh, I'm not either. Don't throw it at me.

I had nothing to do with that. You guys are having the Jackie Chan discussion continue I couldn't name a Jackie Chan movie post uh the one he did with Jet Li whatever that was called what about the foreigner I never saw that I thought that looked interesting directed by the guy that made GoldenEye starring Pierce Brosnan and Jackie Chan I've never seen seen it, but I want to see it. It looked dark. It was like, this is gritty Jackie Chan. His family, I think, dies in a bombing.

And then he's like, I'm going to get revenge. I wonder if there's a blooper reel on that one. There can't be a blooper reel on The Foreigner. There's no way. Oh, that would be awesome. I don't think Pierce Brosnan plays like a spy type character. I think he's just like an executive who's a villain, but I could be wrong.

Haven't seen it. Nice, Eric. Did you see No Way Out, Gavin? What was that? Have you seen No Way Out? Or have you seen No Way Out, Jeff? The movie with Bridget Fonda, the remake of La Femme Nikita?

No. Well, no, I don't think so. Maybe. It's an Owen Wilson movie that came out in like 2016. No Way Out. Kevin Costner. Sean Young. No, that's not.

Gene Hackman. No Escape. That's what I mean. No Escape. Not No Way Out. No Escape. I knew No was in the title. It's just Pierce Brosnan plays Bond.

Again, it's like his last, I'd say, role as Bond. Oh, hell yeah's like his last I'd say role is Bond or he does yeah he can't flat out say he's Bond but it's like they constantly tease the fact that he's like an older burnt out Bond like Sean Connery

in the rock yes exactly like Sean Connery in the rock same type of same type of deal do you know this is gonna be a really weird like just a random question Jeff do you what's your favorite Mission Impossible movie? Let's set it up that way first.

Oh, well, that's easy. That's not even a question. Really? Mission Impossible 3. Mission Impossible 3 is one of the best movies ever made. Thank you. Mission Impossible 3 is one of the best. First off, it's not a movie.

It's a film. Mission Impossible, you can't call Mission Impossible 3 a movie because it's, that would be, it's an insult to what that piece of art is. It is a film in every way. Who was the girl at the beginning? It's Keri Russell. Are you just dropping trivia? Are you testing him to confirm that he is a Mission Impossible 3 fan?

That question is how Jeff lost his car. Really? That's why I own his car. Oh, that was the bet? I got that wrong. Wow. I don't remember who I thought it was, but I didn't think it was Kerry Russell. Didn't you think it was like Anne Hathaway or something?

And I was like, you're an idiot. No! It was somebody that made sense, but it wasn't Kerry. I can't remember who it was. Michelle, did you mistake Michelle Monaghan? Because she's in that as well and i feel like it kind of played out no no we don't i it doesn't matter that you'll never know the important thing is that i know that i haven't owned my car in 15 years why why why do you ask by the way why

do you ask well i glad you were this is a conversation we had i agree mission possible three is the best one by far and i think it's largely due to the performance of Philip Seymour Hoffman. I think one of the great movie villains in that, in that menacing as shit. He's fantastic. He's awesome in it. There are three perfect moments in that film. If you'd like,

I can go through them with you. Uh, the first perfect moment in that film is when they're breaking into the Vatican and, uh, uh, being Vatican and uh uh Ving Rhames and uh Ethan Hunt have the conversation where he goes

what's up with you and Ving Rhames goes nothing what's up with you and he goes nothing that's it's just perfectly acted there's the scene when he's infiltrating the big building I think it's in India and they're like talking about the plant and then it just cuts to him the outside of the building and it cuts to him screaming I'm not gonna make the extraction!

And he jumps out a window, and you have no idea what happened in that building, but it went very fucking wrong. That was an awesome scene. And then at the end, when he's with the chick, and he's like, if you don't kill me,

I'm going to die! That's a great moment, too. All perfect moments from a perfect film. It's great. It starts out, I think, one of the great film intros as well. You don't know what's going on. This character normally in power is in a bad spot doesn't look like carrie russell

apparently it is do you remember philip seymour hoffman's character's name and mission impossible three uh no for like how iconic that character is in my mind of like a great villain. Very forgettable. His name is Owen. I think it's the least menacing name to menacing character in film history. Possibly. There's nothing memorable or evil about the name. Oh, and this is so not intimidating. Yeah, the rabbit's foot.

That's right, Nick. That is this the whole thing. What is it like an atomic bomb or something? The rabbit's foot he's pursuing. I don't really remember what the rabbit's foot was it was i don't know that we ever yeah i don't know that we found out did we well it's in it was wasn't it a thing that rolled there was this insane shot where uh dr manhattan dies and he drops the briefcase and the thing rolls out like perfectly into the camera in focus and it was like wow how did they do that you mean billy crudup yeah okay i assume that's who he means yeah was he not dr manhattan no he was i think he was i just couldn't remember i just couldn't remember you want to bet

a car on it no no i'll bet just car my mission impossible betting days are over still paying off the last one i want to how are you doing jeff because last time we recorded this you were you're in a bad spot you're you're getting ready i was at 36 percent in the first recording i got up to about 42 by the second recording you're like half of where i was in chocolate yeah yeah uh i'm okay thanks for asking um you, I had the colonoscopy. It was a nightmare. I do have a story to share with you at some point, and I'll tease it. There's a pastrami plot twist in my life.

Oh, no. Oh, no. Did they find some pastrami up your ass? Well, but we don't have to get into that right now if you guys want to talk about movies or whatever. What's your favorite Mission Impossible movie, Andrew? What's your second favorite Mission Impossible? What's your second favorite? My second favorite?

This is going to be like a really weird qualifier. I think the second best Mission Impossible movie is the first act of Mission Impossible 1. Up until he sprints out of the restaurant, I think that is like the greatest sequence of any Mission Impossible. But that's before he's hanging from the wire in the room with the pressure for yeah i don't really care about like that that seems fine but like i think iconic it is an iconic scene but if the movie really loses me from the point he sprints out of the restaurant

i think everything to that point is like pretty intense and enjoyable and they're after he's blown up the fish tank with the gun literally as soon as as soon as he sprints out after blowing up the fish tank with the gum that movie takes a nosedive for me it drops down dramatically after that I would say

uh what is the the second the last one that came out which one was that rogue nation rogue nation was pretty Which one was that one? Rogue Nation. Rogue Nation was pretty good. No. I enjoyed that one. No.

Wait. Yeah. Don't know. What if I posted... The Apple Dumpling Gang? A Disney movie called The Apple Dumpling Gang. I was just on that for later. I was just thinking about my favorite movies as a kid the other day. And I was thinking about how many Don Knotts movies I used to watch when I was a kid.

And the Apple Dumpling Gang and the Apple Dumpling Gang Rides Again were two of my favorite movies as a kid. And I looked up the poster and I was like, oh, shit, that's kind of funny because we're at we were an Apple podcast now. Yeah, I was wondering if we should make an Apple Scrumbling Gang poster, but probably not. We're probably hitting the Apple content a little too hard. Is there scrumping in the app? Is the Apple dumpling gang pro-scrump? I think those dudes steal those kids, if I remember correctly.

They steal the kids? Maybe. I think the kids are orphans or something, and they're low-level criminals, and they all end up in a classroom. I don't know why. I assume the children were the Apple Dumpling Gang and not the two guys in the background.

I think I have completely misread who the gang was. Because two people ain't a gang. No, you need at least six for a gang, I would say. I think you need at least three. Three? No. Three's too little. The Apple Dumpling Gang rides again. Ain't no kids in that

photo i think you you can't all fit in a taxi to be a gang your gang can't fit in one cab that's the i think that's the qualifier we're gonna have to order two cabs is the qualifier once you have to have two cabs or maybe a larger vehicle, if you need a custom large vehicle, you've entered gang territory. If you need an Uber XL, you're in. Okay, so I had to look it up. What qualifies a gang? Gangs are associations of three or more individuals who adopt a group identity. So it's got to be three.

So a threesome is a gangbang that's unfortunate i don't i mean if those three people could identify as a gang and they're all banging then yes well yeah i guess they need to identify as a gang that means technically you could film a gang bang in one cab you could you're right i i disagree with all these qualifiers. I don't. Three is not enough to be a gang. It's a regulation gang of three. So we could be the Apple scrumpling gang. There's enough of us. There's five of us here.

Well, are we doing that or are we doing the boys of Dumpty? We've got to get... The boys of Dumpty is a way better gang name. It's gangs left and right. It's gang city over here. It's gang's left and right. It's gang city over here.

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slash face for 10% off and free shipping. Do you know what Eric's been doing? Yeah. He's been sucking on this 100% chocolate for fun. He's all fucking into it now. He sends update photos constantly. I found out a way to enjoy it, where you don't have to just eat it in 10 minutes.

You can sit down and have it with something and and find pleasure in the pain uh why did you go for this just in your free time without telling i had i had the chocolate from face jam and everyone i got jealous because everyone did uh chocolate eating and it seemed like uh something i didn't want to do but seemed like a fun thing so i went you know what i'm gonna try this uh and i did i had that chocolate sitting in there and just wrote in Google, what can I do with 100% chocolate? And that was one of the things was have it with a black cup of coffee that you enjoy. And I will say I've done it twice now with my mouth is watering thinking about it. I enjoyed it so much. Uh, really? How many, let me ask you a question. How many, so like you had

a cup of coffee, black coffee that you enjoy very much. And then how many squares of the chocolate did you have with that? Probably two and a half, three tops. Okay. Throughout the, like slowly, slowly throughout the course of the coffee. Okay. I found the best method was putting a little bit of dark chocolate on my tongue and then taking a drink of coffee and like letting it melt the chocolate because then i got a lot of the floral flavor i'm a coffee

guy the way that andrew is many different types of guy i am a coffee guy and i said you grind your coffee at home by hand yeah like i have like a hand i have like a i have like a hand grinder i like that a lot my i would love to be a coffee guy because the prep and the ritual of it seems like a lot of fun. I feel like I would like to smell. Smells so good. I feel like the smell would be great. It seems like it would be meditative. I love that. If I could

just do that and then not drink it, I would be a coffee guy. My wife is the same way. If I smell coffee early in the morning, it changes the course of my day. It makes me want to shit. It just puts me in a good mood instantly. It does?

Coffee makes you shit. No, no, I know. But smelling it? The smell specifically? Jeff's the one who got me into coffee. I was amazed at what it did to my body. But I've had so much coffee now that just a whiff of it gets me in the mood for a nice morning poo it's like you've pavlov dog your ass with the scent like you're trained love dogged your ass be the title of the episode yep absolutely uh the the king's coast

coffee achieve line that we had for a while was very good. That was an excellent cup of coffee. I prefer a light roast, but I really found a lot of enjoyment in that. Very chocolatey cup. It was very nice. So you're straight in at 100% chocolate. Yeah, yeah. My progress is I've done 70, I've done 78. I'm currently working my way through the 85% bar as I develop my palate over the Q4 of this year.

So Eric, real fast, because I also love that Achieve blend. I actually just, and not just because, you know, the reference. No, it was a good cup of coffee. Yeah. So I subscribe to it on the website. So I get it like every three weeks or every two weeks, I get a new bag of it. So recently they just sent me a bag and on the label it said,

hey, this used to be called Achieve, but we're going to rebrand it. Don't worry, we'll keep sending it to you. It's just going to be called something else. So it's still out there if you want it. Yeah, you can still get it. Do you know which one it is? That's the most recent one I've got.

So as soon as I get the new batch in with a name, I'll tell you what it is. But you can still get that coffee. That's very funny. I think it's all I drink. Yeah, I'll tell you what it is. But you can still get that coffee. That's very funny. I think it's all I drink. Yeah, I love it. Huh. Good.

Very nice. I like it. So, Gav, you were saying, what are you up to? 85. And you enjoy 85? 85 to me is still edible as just chocolate on its own. It's getting up there. I do want to say, I don't want anyone to get confused about the situation that I'm in

with the dark chocolate. I've enjoyed it with a cup of coffee because it changes the flavor. It's like smoking a cigar and having port wine. It's nice. It changes the flavor or whatever. I despise dark chocolate. I think it is the worst thing you can do with chocolate. I think it is an affront to sweets. I think it's pathetic that it's being pressed into actual candy and being sold in stores. If it went away tomorrow, our lives would be better for it. That is how I feel

about dark chocolate. Oh, that's insane. You know what, Eric? Can I say, I tend, I try not to have definitive chocolate opinions because it's such a polarizing world

we live in, but I'm going to back you up on this. I'm right there with you. Listening to you say that, I couldn't, it was like my heart was swelling up with pride because I feel the same way about you. And so you have my back.

I'm right there with you. I think it should be eradicated. You feel the same way about me? You think Eric sucks and if he went away? I feel the same way about dark chocolate as you do. Oh, you feel the same way as me I feel the same way about dark chocolate as you do. Oh, you feel the same way as me, not the same way about me as if I were the dark chocolate

and you want me to go away. No, no, you can stay because I like your opinions. I support them. That's definitely what that sounded like. It was one, you picked the one word that would change the statement into an insult instead of the compliment or support that you intended.

I felt so good, and then I felt so bad. I mean, it's 15, 18 years of this. It's hard to not insult. What is interesting on the chocolates is as the cocoa content goes up, watching the serving size get bigger. I assume as sugar starts leaving the ingredients it's like one serving is two squares and then it's like one serving is two and a half now one serving is three until eventually the entire bar is one serving huh now do you are

you worried how do you feel about milk chocolate because i would be kind of okay but do you think as you progress down this dark chocolate road, developing your palate, will your willingness to have milk chocolate lessen? Well, I'm hoping it's additive to my palate. I hope it's not ruining other areas of my palate. Can that happen? I would assume that it would replace, that you would no longer be able to enjoy what you previously did. Not that this is an expansion. When someone says that's an acquired taste, do you have to misplace a taste

to make room for it? I don't think so. No, but I don't think those are the same thing. I feel as though you are training your palate to be able to prefer, like ideally by the end of this,

your chocolate of choice will be the 100%, correct? Like you will. We can hope so. Yeah. So at that point, I feel like you couldn't be further away from milk.

It's the farthest you could be from milk chocolate. And I would be worried that you would no longer be able to go back to milk. And I feel like your ability to get 100% dark chocolate in the wild would be low. I feel like it's tougher. You're narrowing your ability to get chocolate. Here's where I think Lint are missing a trick, right? ability to get chocolate here's where i think lint are missing a trick right they they should have an excellence training bar where each square is new percentages until and it's the the entire package what about like an advent calendar for your palate like every day it starts at like 76

and on christmas you're at 100. Yeah, it doesn't need to even be Christmas. Just like a daily, hey, this is where you should be. We're at 76.7 today. Maybe F*** Face or Uniform could collaborate with Lint Chocolate and we could get that going. Oh, by the way, how hot is that Uniform logo we're working on?

Looks nice. It does look nice. I'm digging it. I'm really into it. It would look good on some chocolate. I'll tell you that right now. Could you see it? You could see it. Could you see it? Can you see it like debossed into a chocolate bar? The uniform logo?

It looks so sweet. Yeah. I can't wait for us to make a chocolate and then Gavin complain that it's milk when it's dark. Just be completely wrong about what the actual contents of the chocolate are. Are you referring to the, uh, the sign? Yes, yes I am.

I think a comment leaver left a comment saying that, what is this bullshit plastic sign? I still don't actually have the damn thing. So I assumed that they were right about it being made of plastic, but Eric said it's metal. Yes, Eric, this is why you can't listen to comment leavers. I don't know why I was listening. I got one in my hand right now. It is definitely metal.

Well, that's awesome. It's not as shit as I thought. Well, wait, when did you get the sign? Mine came in the mail the day we had that conversation. Okay. I just didn't open it up until later in the day. I'm hoping I get... I've bought every single piece of our merch, and then they've sent it to me anyway. And so I've had double everything,

double waffle, freshener. Why do you buy them? Well, it's part of the support of the show, at the very least. It's all limited runs. You're just taking one away from a comment lever. You make the show. Why would you have to support the show you make? What?

You support it by making it. You also frequently go into the merch channel and get them to make stuff you start some of this stuff And then you buy it well, I was okay Well, I you know what's funny is I think I was told I could be wrong I was told I couldn't get a girl shirt at the time because it's like the process it was made and I Was one of those it was one of those shirt, but you're regardless that I don't mind I buy the product for the show I make the show It was one of those. It was one of those shirts. But regardless of that, I don't mind. I buy the product for the show.

I make the show. I'm happy with the show. Support it in that way. I feel like I'm kind of paying myself in a weird way. I don't mind ordering the things, but the scrumptious sign is the first one I didn't order, and I haven't got a scrumptious sign yet, so I think I may have just missed out.

I think that was the cutoff, the one I didn't order. I'll tell you what. You can have my scrumptious sign, buddy. I'll give it to you. That's very kind of you, Jeff. You got to come down to Austin and get it. I'm not going to mail it to you, but one I didn't order. I'll tell you what, you can have my scrum sign, buddy. I'll give it to you. That's very kind of you, Jeff. You gotta come down to Austin and get it. I'm not gonna mail it to you, but it's waiting for you. Is irregardless a different word to regardless? What do you mean?

Well, you said irregardless. Um... What's your question here? Is irregardless not a word? Irregardless is a word. I would've said regardless. It's the same word. Irregardless and regardless are used interchangeably. I think irrespective is one.

If you reply to an email, you could say irregarding? No, I think you have to say irregardless is the word. I feel like I didn't invent the word. I feel like that is the word that exists. No, you didn't. It's in the fucking dictionary, dude. It's a real word. Well, they're saying it's not a word.

Or it's the same word? Irregardless. Dictionary.com. Irregardless dictionary.com irregardless adverb non-standard regardless the photographer always says irregardless of how his subjects are feeling smile uh frequently asked questions is irregardless a word yes it may not be a word you like or a word you can use in a term paper but irregardless certainly is a word so there we go the same thing as regardless. Yes, it does. Look at you fucking guys coming at me for my irregardless.

Don't you guys. I'm right there with you, buddy. I'm on the side of irregardless. Well, I wasn't slamming you on it. I was asking, is that the same as regardless? You know what? I wasn't going to do this.

I'm going to come at the fucking European language and how they spell it. You know how they spell jail in Europe, Jeff? You know how they spell it? europe jeff you know they spell it fucking well or whatever g-a-i-l horrendous terrible g-a-o-l that's in australia oh the melbourne gale i'm playing through the sherlock holmes game right now and whenever they say it that's how it's spelled and it's disgusting it makes me sick well I spell jail

now hot take well no I don't know if it is because they it's spelled the way I don't know maybe they're doing it like within the

timeline of that game because it's set in the past but every time I see it we have given shit to judgment spelling the US spelling a judgment

also terrible but they Europe fucked up jail that's a horrendous way to We have given shit to judgment. Smelling the U.S. smelling a judgment. Also terrible. But Europe fucked up jail. That's a horrendous way to smell. Judgment. Judgment. Awful. Terrible sounding. So if you're going to come at me for irregardless, I'll bring up jail.

I was coming at you. I was asking you. You said you were coming at him pretty hard. I think Nick and Eric were coming harder. I couldn't tell. You know, I did take theirs as an affront as well, but it's text. They were replying in text.

You can't read tone in text. Should we talk about what Jeff texted us the other day? What did Jeff text us the other day? Well, it started with a picture of an Apple van. Did I just miss? Did I miss these texts? I think you probably did, buddy. What were the texts?

They were texts. They were texts, so your phone was probably off. If it wasn't during the recording, you probably didn't get it. Shall I read out what you text us? Yeah, you can read it out, and then we can get into that story if you want. Yeah, I'd love to. So Friday, 12.41pm, Jeff just sent

a picture of a van with apples on the back and he wrote, Oh, yes. It's so apples. Eric then said, colonoscopy went well then. Jeff said, they're an a van of apples

it's a hot day I saw so many people at a redressing restraint eat place Eric said this rules Jeff said Emily said stop I'm being really quiet. She's on the phone. Eric said, who is she talking to? Do they know about the boys of Zimmer? Jeff said, it's pastrami people. Okay. Well, I'll say this. There's an accompanying video of that moment that I was not aware.

First off, I don't remember any of that. I don't remember texting that stuff. I saw the video. I don't remember being in the video. He's like a seven-year-old. This was all right after my colonoscopy, and I was drugged the fuck up on propofol or whatever it's called. Okay, so we'll get into the pastrami plot twist.

So I was with you guys last week. You know, I was 36% then I was up to like 42 or whatever. It was, I'll say this. This was my second colonoscopy. First one, I was about Gavin's age when I did it. It was sucked, but it wasn't the end of

the world i bounced back you know it wasn't a big deal this one fucking just wrecked me doing the the special diet and then like not eating for three days and then uh doing all the solutions and stuff it was rough i had a really hard time with it and i guess it's just age shit right because i'd done it before when I was younger and it was fine. So then we go in. The plan is you go in, you do the colonoscopy. They knock you out. They shove cameras up your asshole.

They take pictures. You come back. They wake you up. Then the cool thing is they're like, you can have whatever you want to drink. We've got it all. And then you can eat whatever you want. Because it's not one of those things where you like have to come out of it slowly or whatever.

They're like, no, engorge yourself on whatever you want. So I had a whole game plan. When we got in there, we had it set up. Emily was going to order the sandwich, the P word sandwich. And I was going to eat. It was going to be my first meal back after a successful colonoscopy. Then we get in there. I'm in the waiting room.

You know, they're taking blood, doing all the stuff. I'm in the gown, sitting there, joking around. The lady says, what do you want to drink when you come out? I go, what are my options? She goes, we got it all. We got fruit juice. We got water. We got sodas. I go, do you have diet soda? She goes, we have Diet Coke. I was like, can I have a Diet

Coke right after the colonoscopy? She was like, you certainly can. Let me recommend not having a Diet Coke right after colonoscopy. I didn't realize the problem with that until later. But so I go through, have a perfectly normal colonoscopy. I assume I don't remember any of it. I was asleep.

I do remember drinking a bunch of Diet Coke immediately after. And then some hours later, I was home eating a P-word sandwich. There is a video to accompany before we get that far down the road. And I guess it's when Emily is ordering the P-word sandwich. It's too big for Discord. So let me put it in the face slack if you guys just want to watch it. Just to get a reference for how I was in the moment. Eric has a question for you. Okay, Eric, what is your question?

Why do you keep saying P word? We'll get there. Yeah, I just don't like it's just making me. Yeah, I also don't enjoy it. I'm filling in a blank and I don't like it. If you guys want to stop down for about two minutes and watch this video, then come back. All right. Okay.

I'll watch this video. Let's watch it. This is. Oh, I feel like we missed out on an opportunity. We should have interacted. I wish there were more. So I have. Yeah, I have no memory of any of that.

But apparently I saw that van and I texted you guys about it. And apparently I texted you like I was a 90-year-old man using one finger. Anyway, so I have no memory of any of that, but we get home and we go from there to the deli to get that sandwich, and then we go home. And Emily's like, okay, you got some more soda. You got your pea sandwich. And you go to town.

I got to leave for a little bit. She had to do some other stuff. So I started to eat the sandwich. And then I got full real fast because I hadn't eaten in days. And so I laid down in bed, and I'm starting to come to. And then I realized something terrible has happened in my stomach. And I run to the bathroom and I throw up that sandwich. Oh, no. And it's violent.

And then I take a step back and I'm like, OK, I think I'm done. I think I'm done. Well, I did not expect that. I'm supposed to have a huge hunger. I'm supposed to like eat like crazy and replenish. I'm done. I think I'm done. Well, I did not expect that. I'm supposed to have a huge hunger. I'm supposed to eat like crazy and replenish. I'm done now. I guess I'm feeling the ill effects of the medicine, the propofol or whatever they gave me.

I'm having trouble shaking it off. I think what really happened was all that soda on a five-day empty stomach fucked me up. All the carbonation and stuff. Because when we talked to the doctor later, they were like, yeah, you probably should have just had water or orange juice or something. And so I wish they wouldn't have let me have that Diet Coke.

Anyway, so then I go back and I lay down again and I start and I'm not feeling any better and I'm starting to sweat and then I'm like, oh no, and I run and I have to throw up again and I'm on the ground and this then it hits me hard and I'm shooting pastrami, right? I'm shooting the P word in and

and then completely nothing i could do about it not a goddamn thing in the world i could do about it the the the vomit is so violent and it's so it's it's so virulent it's coming out of me with such force that i shit my pants i shit my pants bad you know i mean it's all right? Because I haven't eaten anything in days, and so it's just like yellow green soup, right? And so then I have to sit there and

finish throwing up. I have to finish vomiting with a just like, I don't know, a couple gallons of turd like wet turd, lumpy turd in my pants. So then, as soon as I'm done throwing up, I have to take all my clothes off, right? And I put them over in a pile, and then as soon as I'm done throwing up, I have to take all my clothes off, right? And I put them over in a pile.

And then I go, yeah. Then I go take a shower. And I have to, I have to, I rinse my whole body. I have to get completely and totally clean. I take a complete shower, dry off, and realize,

oh no, I gotta throw up again. So I run back into the bathroom and I throw up one more time. But this time I'm naked, so I just shit all over the floor. This is the second time I've shit a bathroom floor this year. I'm naked so I just shit all over the floor. This is the second time I've shit a bathroom floor this year.

I'm breaking records. And I mean, it's like a shotgun blast of yellow liquid everywhere. So I throw up for a while longer and then I have to clean my entire bathroom floor. Then I have to do all the laundry. Then I have to take another shower and then I have to lay down.

Here's the pastrami plot twist. Oh, Jesus Christ. That's the last time I will ever say that word. To say it makes me nauseous. To spell it in my head makes me nauseous. To think about it. To think about the smell. I can't ever touch it again.

No. It's gone. It's ruined for me. The colonoscopy killed that sandwich. It killed that flavor. It killed that word. I'm telling you, I'm sweating thinking about it. I can't believe it.

I didn't see this coming. I fell so hard for it. I loved it so much. Flew way too close to the sun. And then as the wax melted my wings, I shit all over the land and then I plummeted down like Icarus and I drown in a sea of shitty pastrami puke and it's over.

That's my plot twist. The colonoscopy killed the pastrami. And I can't say the word anymore. I'm not going to say anymore after this. Not even specifically the colonoscopy. The person that gave you the Diet Coke murdered it. It was hit it was like they put a hit maybe that was too much flavor in my body all at once and it was i do i there just is something wrong about having a medical procedure and the first thing you do after to start chugging diet cokes like that just seems

inadvisable in my head it just doesn't seem yeah i feel like i've been on water and toast yes a soda is not what i'm reaching for after a medical procedure for sure now again when i i like i don't even want to really ask the question but i feel like i have to when we're talking about the splatter on the scale of the smoothie you made how bad is it is it because that's on the second much okay okay okay okay okay what's the much smaller much smaller room self-contained it all stayed on the floor okay but there was a lot it was a it was a it was a it was a covered floor but nothing got the walls. Maybe a little bit on the baseboards, but not on the walls at all. Not above the baseboards. Jesus Christ.

Yeah, it was... You shot the baseboards. It was maybe the lowest I felt. Yeah, I shot the baseboard. It was maybe the lowest I felt in quite some time. And I was fucked up for a day and a half after. It took me most of the weekend to rebound. It was just

it was just i was in bed like i had i felt like i had a hangover and i haven't had a drink in five years it was horrible i can't i'm so sorry for your loss this is what i am too what a day of the the joys the high of you seeing an apple van to what happened a mere few hours later, I assume. Yeah. It's a real tragedy, man. I can't believe, I don't want it to be true. I keep thinking, like,

I wake up the next day and I'm like, maybe today it won't, nope, it's still, the thought of it makes me, yeah, if I see the word, I get nauseous. I've had some drinks that I've thrown up on that I still, to this day day can't drink yeah like like what what was there's this drink there was this drink in england i'm not sure if they have it here it was called j2o which was like it was like a juice but in a bottle and uh i think i just i had too much booze one night and then i was dehydrated so i just chugged one of them but it was was too late, and I just ended up throwing up.

But all of the J2O flavor went in my mouth and nose along with the Vom, and I still hate that flavor. One of my favorite drinks back in the day. That's tragic. It's awful,

and that was just a byproduct. I had that with Mountain Dew in high school. I haven't been able to drink Mountain Dew since high school because I threw up, got sick from it. That's not a good sign

for your pastrami returning. I know dude. I know. I know. Mountain Dew's been out for about 28 years. Yeah. This is like a weirdly regional Chinese food but chicken balls were my go to growing up. Loved them. Great great Chinese food. I puked

once after eating them on dinner and there was a chunk of chicken on like the on top of the toilet on like the seat it was there was a chunk of chicken on like the the the on top of the toilet on like the seat there's just like a chunk lab killed killed chicken balls for me for years i still don't order them as regularly as i used to but like never and that one never fully this is so full circle this is palette regression this is exactly what we're talking about this is the palate regression for sure i just oh i just i feel a bit like a hypocrite like i was just on the rt podcast like a week ago singing the praises of that deli meat and now like now here i am like but a few days later and i can't i can't be in the same room as it let Let me submit. Is there a food, Jeff, that you hate that is very commonly loved that people are like,

you really? Yeah, dude. Did we just lose him? I lost him. Yeah, I think we lost him. Let's wait for him to come back. It's a weekly occurrence. Yeah, he's gone now.

Oh. Sit tight. Oh, Andrew, you there? Must have run out of bits. Hello? Oh, there he goes. My computer froze. Sorry about that.

All right. So my question was, is there a food that everybody loves that I hate? Everyone loves that froze sorry about that all right so my question was is there a food that everybody loves that i hate everyone loves that you hate yes that was my question yeah yeah what uh what is everything white mayonnaise cream cheese cottage cheese uh but like that you would be sour cream i don't feel like those are necessarily rants dressing social foods I'm trying to think of like pressure. Because I'm saying that I'm assuming you're going to have to have a colonoscopy

again in the future at some point. And I think you should view this as an opportunity to take out another food. Guacamole. I can't eat guacamole. All you need to do, consume, drink a Diet Coke once again after your next one and then eat whatever that food is

and then if someone's like oh do you want this you'd be like no i got sick when i had it i can't i honestly feel like diet coke got off easy through this like the fact that it didn't ruin that flavor that's true no for sure it's totally true well i don't really remember drinking i mean i remember that i drank that coke i don't really remember that i definitely remember eating that sandwich and i didn't taste the Diet Coke on the way out. I tasted the other thing a lot. It was in my nose. Oh, no.

Yeah, it was, yeah. Was it at least a good, was it a good pastrami sandwich? Apologize for using the word. Was it good? Was it like a top tier one? Did you at least go out on top? Was it a delicious sandwich?

That's disappointing. My stomach felt wrong from the get-go. So it may have been, but when I dove in, I thought, oh, this isn't as enjoyable as I, and I thought, oh, maybe I have a little bit of a sick, I got to power through. And I never even finished. I had like a half through it before I had to take a break. And then I didn't touch it again until it was to run into the kitchen to throw it away, just to get it out of the house.

There's a beautiful edit of the last time we recorded of you in an episode discussing how excited you were for that sandwich. Not knowing at that time that that would be the last time. The last time you could enjoy one. I had, I had it all planned. We had it all planned out. I was so excited.

It was going to be the highlight of the colonoscopy. A, the highlight of the colonoscopy would be that there's nothing wrong with my butthole, right? And by the way, I'm fine. A colonoscopy is great. But then the second one was going to be like sitting atop a healthy butthole mountain

eating, chowing down on my favorite sandwich. And instead, I rolled down the mountain and every time I swung around, the sandwich hit me in the head until I landed in a puddle of my own puke and shit. And then I just lay there until somebody drug me out. It's terrible. It's terrible.

I feel it's a real loss. It's a real loss. Nobody feels it more than I do. I was eating this thing two or three times a week. It's true. We did a video recently where we were racing. We were trying to go far on a chair that was balanced on two hoverboards. And halfway through the video, I'm just stuffing my face with a pastrami sandwich that you brought into the office.

Yeah, I brought you guys extra sandwich. It was really nice. Andrew annoyed me recently. What did I do? Uh-oh. He told me that there's a store right by him that sells Princeton pickle. Yeah. And salad cream.

Yeah. What? Yeah, there's a store close to me that sells both. I had no idea. I could literally see it from where I live. And it was there the whole time. I could literally see it from where I live. And it was there the whole time.

I sent you a freaking jar that I assume was mailed from England to America and then forwarded by me to Canada. And you could have walked. I could have, like, 100% I ordered mine from Europe. My salad cream. For a product that I could see from my window. Yeah, I just didn't know. Didn't know that they had it. Wasn't aware. I was trying to think. I'm glad that that is the thing from my window. Yeah, I just didn't know. Didn't know that they had it. Wasn't aware.

I was trying to think. I'm glad that that is the thing that annoyed you. I was trying to think. Why, did you think I would be annoyed at something else you did? Well, that's what I was wondering about. I was trying to think, have I annoyed you? I thought you were going to call me out

for my agency blunder. What was that? My miscall. We're talking about James Bond. What agency does James Bond work for Jeff you mean like government agency yeah like what

where would he work I learned a lot about James Bond recently he works for like in I don't know what so I said M16 I said he worked for m16 that's not that it's close it was close it's close though it's mi6 he works at mi6 apparently if you read the i as a one if you read the i as the one I was I was directionally correct like you could mistake it for what I said

I also didn't know that q's name isn't q I thought q was q I thought that was just his name I was directionally correct. Like, you could mistake it for what I said. I also didn't know that Q's name isn't Q. I thought Q was Q. I thought that was just his name. That was his cool nickname. Not that it was an abbreviation for his job. You said you thought his name was like Quentin or something. Well, yeah, it could be.

Like, I just thought it was a shortened version of what his name was. This old bloke called Quentin who works for a gun. Well, it was a conversation about what would his job title be because he's like an inventor of gadgets, but I don't think inventor would be what he'd be called. And then that's how it turned. He's a quartermaster.

Is this? That's his job. He stands for quartermaster. Yeah. Hmm. That makes sense. I thought is M not, is M not a version of her name too?

What's M's name? Probably from manager. It's not a version of her name too what's M's name probably from manager it's hinted at that her name as Dench starts with an M yeah and the new M is called Mallory so it just it's clearly it's just a name thing I thought they just were very like weirdly for some reason everybody abbreviated the name they shorten it down their

nickname take a letter from your name Q could be Quentin and his mallory apparently then they review reveal not review they didn't review m's name but they did reveal it i want to say in skyfall right doesn't he go into her desk and you see her name uh in casino royale he's like i had no idea m stood for and then she interrupts him i could have swore that we saw the name the full name and skyfall at the very end of it really could be wrong i based on everything i'm wrong about literally everything else when it comes to james bond i don't know why i'd be right about this so let's just assume i would i would say i would in doubt defer to gavin on the james on the james bond shit yeah that's fair he knows way too much about it. That's fair. I liked him. They're good movies.

They're fun. Well, they're not all good movies. I think even the bad ones... Well, no. Quantum of Solace just sucks. I take that back. There's some genuine just bad Bond movies. What do you think the worst James Bond movie is? That I've seen? I'd say

Quantum of Solace. I think For Your Eyes Only is shit. Yeah. And I don't like Honor, Majesty, Secret Service. That's a bit of a controversial one. A lot of people think that one is really good. It's a good one. What's the one that the non-sanctioned one they did?

Never Say Never Again. Never Say Never Again. Yeah, I don't remember that one being great. And the first Casino Royale. Is that the other non-Eon Bond movie? I think that was don't remember that one being great and the first casino royale is that the other non-eon bond movie i think that was the david niven one yeah david niven was in the original casino royale yeah that's one where like james bond is very clearly an alias and there's like a jimmy bond and like a bunch of different james bonds right i've never seen that movie i haven't seen that one either i think there's like six james bonds in it technically i read the book i don't remember i must have seen the movie when i was a kid but i don't

remember it could i i i just want to give some credit to maybe the greatest not james bond james bond movie for a minute a movie that i feel is underappreciated and in this time and agent cody banks that's a that's a good one too i was thinking today it's so weird that you brought up agent cody banks i was thinking have i It's so weird that you brought up Agent Cody Banks. I was thinking, have I just accidentally seen every Frankie Muniz movie? I felt like it was possible that I had. And it turns out he's in a lot of things that is just like obscure, kind of like post 2006. Haven't seen a lot of Frankie Muniz's work.

But Triple X, Triple X is a fantastic notames bond james bond movie from the millennium what do you mean from the money what do you like the original triple x with vin diesel what was the movie you watched on the yes yeah yeah it was yeah yeah two years early yes exactly that story yes i thought sorry i misunderstood what you're saying great movie it's like if vin diesel wanted it vin diesel will never be cast to play sherlock holmes but he clearly really wants to and it's the closest you'll get to vin diesel as a sherlock holmes movie there's such a great scene in that film where he's in a diner and he's like there's no way that this person is really a waitress because she's wearing high heels and that the shift that she's like there's no way that this person is really a waitress because she's wearing

high heels and that the shift that she works like that's that doesn't make sense reading a newspaper on a sunday that's a point like he is his delivery is so dumb guy trying to be smart guy it has a place in my heart i love that movie it's a terrible good bad movie doesn Doesn't he like grind a rail or slide a rail on a serving platter? Yes, he does. Yeah, yeah, okay. Yes, he does. The literal beginning of that movie is they kill traditional James Bond

and they're like, this is the fuck. Xander Cage is the new guy. Sounds like the tuxedo. It is a better movie than the tuxedo. I'll say it right now. That's a good movie. I remembered it being a good movie.

He drives a car off of a bridge while Tony Hawk films him because the guy is like a senator who's against video games and he does a monologue about how video games are good and then he drives his car off a bridge and the senator's name is Dick

and he's like, don't be a dick, Dick. It's great writing. Tony Hawk thinks it's very funny. It's a great, terrible movie. I want to watch that one again. You should. You should watch one and three.

Both great. You can skip two. Not really needed, but the first and third, both the Xander Cage entries of the Triple X series worth watching. So wait, Triple X one is Vin Diesel. Then two is like Ice Cube or somebody. Yes. Yep. And then three is Vin Diesel again.I is Vin Diesel, then two is like Ice Cube or somebody? Yep.

And then three is Vin Diesel again? Three is Vin Diesel again, like 15 years after the first one that came out. Is the second one considered canon in that universe? Yes, because Ice Cube shows up in the third movie and they do like a whole XXX agent thing. Why doesn't Vin Diesel like being in his own sequels? He wasn't in the second fast and furious either i just it was a money issue or an ego thing he's right sequels are shit i'll come back if the sequel worked out and then he's just in the rest of it he strangely was committed to

the chronicles of riddick series though he did that's the sequel he was he was all about i think that's like fuck he had did he have something to do with the story, though? I feel like he did. Also, maybe, is the second Riddick movie a prequel? Technically? Oh, so he'll be in his own prequels. Yeah, so as long as the story goes backwards,

he'll gladly be in the second one, but he cannot make a direct continuation unless there's a gap. I still haven't seen the most recent Fast and the Furious. I really need to. You have. You don't have to see it to have seen it. I guarantee you've seen it.

Everybody's already seen it. It's good, but you've seen it. Because those movies are so overly complicated because of how loved Han was from the Tokyo Drift movie that like, Tokyo Drift comes after five six and seven I want to say just so that they could explain him being in it but he's back in

nine so like there's no reason for them doing any of that he's just they like they found a way and I really want to know how they bring him back I feel like he probably climbed down like a storm drain or like lifted a manhole and dropped oh boy are you in for a treat oh i can't yeah you're gonna you're i wouldn't get your hopes up about it playing the game right now and the game is we should we should do a triple x tuxedo new fast and the furious like like triple movie what do you call it? Back to back to back? An apple dumpling squad or whatever. Damn. We need to find a through line between all these movies.

Triple feature. You mentioned how it's done earlier. Do you think at this point Baba Booey is more famous than Baba Louie? Yeah. I would think so yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah what is bob do you know who do you know who baba louie is no i have no idea who baba louie is i know who baba there's your answer well there you go yeah where's your answer

baba louie was a hannah was a hannah barbara cartoon character uh from back in the 60s and gary Delabate who is the producer of the Howard Stern show got really into collecting animation cells back in like the early 80s and he bought a Baba Louie cell and he was bragging about it on the Stern show and he called it Baba

Louie and then Howard goes you paid $500 for this and you don't even know his name is Baba Louie you fucking idiot that's your nickname from now on Baba Bowie. And Gary made the mistake of going, yeah, that'll stick. But I think in Gary's defense,

sometimes that character was called Baba boy. Yeah, I think so. So it was Hanna Barbera as a group. They weren't. I remember learning those were two people and it blowing my, my mind. No idea.

You thought it was one woman. I thought Hanna Barbera. Yeah. You thought it was one woman called Hanna-Barbera? Yeah, I thought it was one person named Hanna-Barbera. Oh. Could be first and last name. That's true. Could work. Sure. Should we end the show?

We have so many movies to watch. It's true. Should we just do like a riff tracks of our viewings? I would love to. Danny Trejo's the triple X. Bring a Trejo back. Can never talk about trejo's the triple x bring a trejo back can never talk about enough he's got a great role in that they make fun of how long his hair is he has one scene he's also short vin diesel calls him short i don't know how much taller

vin diesel is than danny trejo in real life what are vin diesel stats what is this and every podcast have you noticed eric that every podcast that goes off the rails ends up with jeff googling What are Vin Diesel's stats? I'm going to look him up. What is this? End. End of the show. Every podcast. Have you noticed, Eric, that every podcast that goes off the rails ends up with Jeff Googling Vin Diesel? Vin Diesel is six feet tall. Is he? But how old was he in the movie? Nick just asked a very important question.

When will your Far Cry 6 Trejo playthrough begin? Nick, they removed Danny Trejo from Far Cry 6. I can't do it. He has been taking it. Yeah, I guess they accidentally released that mission before it was done. It's not supposed to come out. Yeah, he's DLC for December. And they accidentally put him in with a patch they were doing.

So then they pulled Trejo. They pulled Trejo out recently with a patch note of like we've removed danny trejo from our game we will be bringing him back you gotta leave him in at that point well no i i literally i don't think the mission was finished i think they were still like no i finished the mission no i did but when you do the mission jeff he's like now i need you to deliver my tacos and you get in his car he's like like, good job. It just kind of ends. I don't think they were done designing the mission. Similar to PT, do you think

consoles or PCs with the unpatched Trejo will go for a lot on eBay? If they will. I can never connect this Xbox to the internet again. I bet mine's already patched out. God damn it. It is.

He's gone. He's goneed out. God damn it. It is. Yeah. You can't. Yeah. He's gone. He's gone, Jeff. I'm sorry. No traveling Trejo. But we can watch Danny Trejo in the classic film Triple X. Maybe we should play less Halo and watch more movies together.

I would enjoy that. Fine with that. Let's do it. Andrew didn't even show up to Halo yesterday. I had things. I wanted to. I missed it. do it. Andrew didn't even show up to Halo yesterday. I had things. I wanted to. I missed it. All right.

Chill out. Sad, sad, sad. Well, there you go. Let's not be here anymore. Let's be somewhere else. Maybe together or apart. I don't give a shit. The audience, you can come along or not.

I don't even know. Bye. Bye. Hello, everyone. Minor League fan Jack here to give you a preview of next week's episode of F*** Face based solely off Discord. Andrew sinks his teeth into a cosmic crisp. Or does he? Gavin is not a rubbish guy.

Jeff isn't edgewise at all. Andrew continues to be bad at gambling. We get an Apple score that will blow your mind. And once again, Andrew does not eat the pencil. All that and more on next week's F*** Face.