F**kface - Best Combined Animals Draft

Episode Date: November 9, 2025

AN EGG are back and they're slamming animals together to see what fits. Some of these animals exist. Some of these animals don't. All of these animals are chosen and they are more than one animal. WHO WON? Support us directly at https://www.patreon.com/TheRegulationPod Stay up to date, get exclusive supplemental content, and connect with other Regulation Listeners. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

That's annoying. What? You're a muffler. You don't hear it? Oh, I don't even notice it. I usually drown it out with the radio. How's this? Oh, yeah.

Way better. Save on insurance by switching to Bel Air Direct and use the money to fix your car. Bell Air Direct, insurance, simplified. Conditions apply. Gab, you want to kick this one off? It was your idea. It was Gab's idea. Huh?

I think, I'm sorry. It's my idea. Yeah. I love it. I fucking love it. It never gets told. Hello? And welcome to another piece of regulation supplemental content.

It's draft day. I hope everybody is excited. I hope everybody's ready. Today we're going to dip into the world of the island of Dr. Moreau. We're going to do a combined animals draft. As always, idea gifted to us from Gavin. How do you guys see this one going? Everybody excited?

I'm so glad you said that because I was terrified of this draft, to be honest. I made multiple boards because I didn't know what we were doing. I'm the same. You saying that makes me understand exactly what this is and I feel good about it. I had no idea what this was and I don't even, I'm so nervous about this one. I don't understand a lot of our drafts anymore.

I don't know what's hard about this. What is this? He just said. It's a draft. It's a draft about the best combined animals. Okay. Yep. We had some text conversation.

This is unusual for us to talk. I feel so much on a text chain outside of a recording to get down to brass tacks about what we're doing. Andrew texted yesterday is people and animal. Jeff said no humans. Nick said, I think human is animal. I said no humans. So that's two for no humans.

One for human is animal. And then Jeff said, it sounds like Gavin is the tiebreaker. I mean, it wasn't a tie. Well, we one could infer that Andrew was going to say yes. I agree. I agree. I agree.

And Gavin said, I think people is animals. And Jeff said, useless. I will be abstaining from using animals and sticking to the spirit of the original idea. But you do you. Immediately followed by a text from Gavin that said, oh, it's definitely a cheap move and I wouldn't use it. Thanks, man. Yeah, I feel like that's a real cop out. People are animals, though.

And then I said, fine, you use humans, you can have Batman, you can have Ant Man, you can have, uh... See, you doing that, now you saying that, you're using those examples, now I'm confused. Now I don't know what this is. Back to being nervous. He was joking. If you combined a bat and a man, what would you have? Man bat. Yeah, would man bat.

Batman. If you combined an ant and a man, what would you have? Man ant? You're not saying these characters that are known. You're giving another... In a world in which Batman... Batman isn't a thing, is what you're saying. I throw in condo, man.

In a world in which you're confused, how? I don't understand what was confusing about that. Well, here's the thing. Here's the thing about the confusion here. Is that it might not matter because, Andrew, you might draft first and set the tempo. That's true. That's true. It's really important here about who drafts first, I think, to kind of set a tempo on what we're about to do.

Because I have a list that I feel pretty good about. But in order to start this draft, we have to randomize. We're using Sean Bear's site. So we got to randomize to see what order we go in, as always. We start in an egg order, but then we randomize how many times, boys? I don't feel qualified to even make a suggestion because I might not know what this is. Andrew is out of sorts. I'm sorry, how many?

Four. Yeah, four's good. Why four? Why not? Because it's like A, B, D. Go out, scroll up. We got like A, B, C, D. in the titles there.

And if that's the D is 4. Jeff, any thoughts on that? Man, uh, yeah, that's as good an answer as any. I kind of like it. He could have said like most animals have four legs or something like that. He went with scroll up A, D, C, B. It's all kind of there and D is four.

All right. D is four. So let's see. We start an egg. Here's three randomizations. One, two, three is Andrew N. First three of these four, but, but, that is, that is three. Here's four.

Oh, boy. Here's our draft order. The funniest would be Gavin, then me second at the end. Andrew, Andrew. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, boy. Okay, well, I feel really good about my picks.

I think I've both probably, well, no, I do. I feel the most I bet you I've done the most prep but also potentially the least prep depending on how this goes I'm going Island Moreau style based on what you were saying I think this this fits

give me a second to pull up my board Island Moro whatever Monroe I don't know I didn't remember that's the part yeah that's the part that we're really that we're hanging out on yep that's right Island Monroe yeah the Val Kilmer movie

Yeah, he was in it Hey, Andrew, we're not confused here With the first pick With the first pick And the combined animal draft Yep I go with none other Than the chingood

Steady on Oh boy Oh my second boy Chin kugger Chin kugitter Is the first pick What is the what The what

Chin kugator C-H-I-N Then, after that, C-O-U-G A-T-O-R It's a chin cougeter Let me go to Discord If you guys want to look in the chat screen for a second What's the chin in it?

Well, you're going to see It's a cougar and a gator, but what's the chin? I drew, I felt like with these animals You drew? I drew all my animals because I thought having a visual representation of the animals is important for this. So this is a chin cougarer. As you can see,

it is the face of a chinchilla, the body of a cougar, and the back half of a gator. I was going to say that the word written just looks like someone clearing their throat, and the picture kind of looks like the result of that spat into a tissue. Yeah, it's a chin cougar.

Andrew? I think you have understood the assignment beautifully. Yeah, you did a great job, man. I think Chinkugiter is, it's maybe not the like number one with a bullet pick, but it's a great first round draft pick. I did a second drawing pointing to what parts were of each word. Oh, we're not done. Yeah. Yeah, I just feel like to draw to use an alligator, but only use the back half is pretty wild.

Yeah, right? Well, here's the thing. This is what makes the chinkugiter great. it's got a soft little cute head and give it some good chin rubs it's got the upper half speed it can go stealth mode but then it also has the ability to swim really fast you got multiple things covered

and it's very cute it's a very cuddleable animal does it maintain the death roll ability of a crocodile or an alligator or whatever oh yeah it can't it can roll like nobody it's a top roller for sure it looks more like a koala

at the front Oh, you know, chinchilla, koala, you know, you can pretend. Maybe I just don't know a chinchilla off the top of my head. It's kind of like, what if like a guinea pig rolled around in dirt? Yeah. Yeah. Like a mousy-looking chunk guinea pig. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, chinkugeter is on the board. So if you guys had that, you have to erase it from your list. You cannot also draft the chinkugator. I have the next pick. I pick cat dog. He is a cat and a dog. It's cat dog. Oh, yeah.

Where do they poop from? Yeah. I mean, it seemed like to me pretty right down the middle. When I thought combined animals, I thought cat dog and everyone that I talked to when I said we're doing a combined animals draft, they all went, oh, like cat dog. And I went, yeah, that's going to be my first pick. I mean, it's a famous combined animal. That is.

I think it might be number one. Is it ahead of the chicugeter? Not on our board, but maybe just in the pop culture zeitgeist, it might be. Can Chin Kugitur overtake it, perhaps? It's possible. I'm curious how many episodes they did of Cat Dog. That feels like a show that could have went on for like six seasons and seven thousand episodes or like 132 episodes that they just played constantly.

There's four seasons, which is nice. And it appears to be 68 episodes. Yeah, that feels right. Wow, the last one, and it aired in, the last one aired in 2005. That's way too late for Cat Dog to be going. but cat dogs my pick I think in the zeitgeist very easy pick for me

Jeff what do you got hello so most of our planet most of our planet is covered in water salt water to the exact and I love

I love water everybody knows I'm a big water guy I'm not water adjacent I'm full on water I like to dive in water I like to swim in water I'm not scared of water I used to surf

but one thing that bugs me about the water, is that we are not the masters of that domain. The ocean is full of apex predators, not the least of which are sharks. Sharks exist to eat and kill, and they've been the bane of many a surfer and swimmer

and also the star of many an awesome action movie. But I would like a safer ocean. So I propose that we create the scarity shark. We fuse all sharks with puffer fish.

Now, you may say, Jeff, why would we do that? Here's why, I'll tell you. We still have sharks. They still roam the oceans, right? Except a puffer fish, when it senses aggression or a dangerous situation, it puffs up, and then it floats to the top. So if we essentially turn all sharks, these killing machines, into puffer fish as well, anytime a shark goes to attack a human, it's going to puff up, and then it's going to miss,

because it's going to rise above the human before it gets a chance to bite it. And it's going to essentially make the ocean safer for humans. I love it. So is it called Scarity Shark? Scaety Shark. Okay. Okay.

I just want to make sure. I didn't know the puffer fish float when they get filled with air. I'm gonna assume they do. Okay. I also got it. I also didn't know

they could fill with air while down underwater. So that's pretty interesting. Oh, it's a whole thing they do. Yeah. Wait, what did you think they do? Well, it seems like they would fill with water.

Oh, I see. Yeah, but it makes them slow and less killable. And they go like, And then they're bouncing around all buoyant and stuff, yeah. Yeah, if it was air, wouldn't they need to have a... Well, yeah, that's what I think that's what I'm saying, Gavin, is that I was just mostly confused about what happens to a buffer fish at this point.

I didn't know that they floated. I had something in the, I don't know, it's something in the genetics when the, when you cross it with the shark, it's weird. I would love to have a list of all of the pieces of media that Jeff is pulling his knowledge from for this pick. because none of it's based in animal fact. It is all jaws and finding Nemo and a bunch of other sea-based media. Whereas everything you're doing is scientifically accurate and from a textbook.

Absolutely. Island Monroe style. Yeah, Island Monroe style. All right. Like Maryland. Well, Scarty Shark is now on the board, a shark that gets bigger, which makes it less scary, I guess. Nick, what is your combined animal in the first round here?

It puffs up and it can't swim fast no more because it's all round and it's like a fucking bouncy balloon. I will say it would make Jaws a lot less interesting. Yeah. Well, it kind of happened to Jaws right at the end there. A little bit. Yeah, yeah. I mean, Bruce. It was brief. For like half a second, he was a scary

shark. Yeah, and then he was a gone shark. Well, when I first heard about the combined animal, draft. I thought, what? And then my second thought was, well, we've been on this Thanksgiving tear lately. You have. And then I thought, well, I love this little dish that's called turduckin. Turducken is stuffed chicken inside, or chicken stuffed inside a debone duck, which is then stuffed into a d bone turkey, and it has layers of stuffing and cornbread or sausage in between my best combined animal is a dead one and a delicious one. Oh, so it's actually the turduckin and not like some sort of living

version of it? You just won? Okay. Yeah. I, Nick, that's so, never even crossed my mind to go turduckin. Great idea. Great pick. Excellent food. Thank you. Wow. It never crossed my mind to go turduckin. I don't even know what a turducken

looks like. You can see it right there on Discord. Let me look. It's hideous, but it's delicious. Yeah, I mean, from the outside, it just looks like the biggest one. Yeah, cross-section style. It looks like all of them. Even in death, the turkey one. Even in death, the turkey one. You guys, you know how we're always saying off turkey wins again? Even in death.

Well, the one that gets pardon does. Turducken is a great first round pick. Very top of mind for people, maybe. But Gavin, you have the last pick of the first round and the first pick of the second round. And Gavin, we know you. So we're excited to see where this goes. Where you go? Well, you know, I like fun.

I like fun animals. some of the fun animals they're no longer with us. We know you, man. You love fun. You love fun animals. I love the dodo. I think it was a great bird. It sadly died out, but maybe it wouldn't have if it had armor.

So I would like to combine it with the Armadillo. I give you the Armadildo. I think that's another great one. You clearly understood the assignment. I don't understand all the fear and trepidation. Armadildo is maybe the best one on the board.

Honestly, I think you might have just come up with a brand name. What would Armadildo sell, Nick? Dildos. Okay. That's what you got out of Armadildo is dildos? Weird. Vibrators. I don't know.

I don't think Armour or dodoes are really associations with vibrators, generally. No, just the name. A poor animal is going to get vibrated to death. What does it look like, Gavin? If you could, like, describe it. A dodo with armadillo skin. How does it fly? Did a dodo fly, Nick?

I don't know. I mean, in GTA 3, it didn't do a great job of it. Did a dodo fly? I don't know. There's something really funny imagining that in pitching this, like you're creating the animal to see how it would react. And I'm just imagining an armadildo immediately just like being stuck to the floor and unable to move due to the weight of the armor.

protection that they have. You might be right. Well, maybe it could also tuck into a ball as well. I'm thinking about this now from this point forward as like incurable space program where you test your rocket and you just see how it goes. Like we're throwing out these animals and then just imagining how they would actually function. Imagine like a version of the video game spore, but good and you could actually combine different

animals. That's, I like that. I like the way you're thinking. I like the way you're thinking. And I see that with Armadildo, which is a great pick, to end the first. first round, but Gavin, you got to kick off the second round, and we do know you love fun animals. Yeah. Well, there's a, there's a little monkey creature called a tamarin. Um, not to be confused with tamarind, which I think is a food thing. But a tamarin is a nice, cute little monkey.

But what if it was combined with a cute little horse, like, or like a, like a pony? I would like to introduce to you the tampon. Okay. I see what tap. This is good. This is great. It's tamarin and it's a pony. Okay. And what does it look like? Yeah. What's it? Yeah. Well, self-inspact to really. That was. I like that your imagination went as far as the name and not the look. That's exciting to me. That's pretty cool.

Yeah. I guess we'll leave it to the listener to kind of come up with. I, you know, I wasn't asking you, you're like draw it. I was just hoping you'd be like, oh, it's got like, you know, it's like horse legs and a big mustache, like a tamarin, you know? I love that Andrew's drawn all his. Maybe I can draw mine after this recording and we can just insert them into the video. Oh, that sounds fun. Like if we don't even get to react to them, that's awesome. I could show you. Yeah, I could go and go. Go get run over in the street. I could do that. Yeah. That was some

Gavin feedback at Gavin. That felt yeah. Holy shit. Wow. I just wanted you to go like, oh, it's a horse with like a tamarin mustache, like the monkey. And you just went, I don't know. Gavin, go long. Nah. All right.

Well, back to catch the pass as Nick as we go to his pick for the second round here. What's you got, Nick? And I'm going long. I'm going long, Eric. Throw it deep. Because here's what I also thought. when I thought of combined animals. I thought pretty horrifying, right?

Usually some creation that's ungodly and against nature. And then I thought, yeah, you know what? I love horror movies too. So I'm going with the Pred alien. Combination Predator Alien from the second AVP movie. Yeah. Horrible creature sucks. It did, but the creature was cool.

Not using Xenomorph is a wild move. Well, it's called Pred Alien. It is called the Pred Alien. It's his name. So, shove it. Somebody hasn't seen Alien First Predator, too. How embarrassing. Gavin, what would you name it?

Yeah, what would you call it? Predomorph? I don't know. Now, if you had to describe it, Gavin, how would you describe it? Yeah, why don't you draw it so we can look at it later? Yeah, yeah. What would it look like? Hold on. What would it look like? He just deleted it. I'm imagining the entire xenomorph, but instead of the mouth that comes out of the mouth, It's just the predator mouth

And everything else is the same Wow Have you sure you haven't seen the movie You may have seen it Yeah It does have that but it has the dreads too Oh man What I think is so interesting

Is it never even occurred to me To pick existing Combined animals Same Wasn't even a thought Oh you didn't think like Centaur and like mermaid and let No not even slightly

But you asked about human I figured that's what you were asking about. No, no, no, no. I was my own creation for that. Andrew's, Andrew is a human centipede-style scientist that I don't like. I don't remember what the

animals were, but what I was thinking when I asked that was the head of one animal, the legs of another animal, and the body of Zach Ertz, the NFL tight end. And I was just going to use the Ertz part to bridge the two things.

Wow. I think I'd have been okay with that now that I hear it. Yeah, I mean, I think I probably would have let it slide. It's so specific. Well, Pred Alien is on the board, so Jeff, you can't pick that one. You had Scarity Shark in the first round. Taking it off my list. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Along with Chincoo Gator. Chincugator. Okay. Well, luckily for a humanity, our oceans are now safer,

which frees me up to spend more time in the water doing stuff I like to do. the things I do like to do is I like to fish a little bit. The problem with fishing for me, I'm not crazy about seafood. I want to be, but I'm not. I can eat it. I'll never say no to go into a seafood restaurant because I don't want to diminish anybody else's opportunity to eat seafood. So I eat a lot of seafood that I don't particularly enjoy, but I would like to enjoy it. And that's why I would like to propose to you that now that we have safer oceans, we invent a new kind of fish. We mix a, hold on, I've got a few different people. Okay. We're going to go with the sea dog.

We're going to mix a dolphin and a hog so that I can have ocean pork. That's amazing. I have to take one off my list. Really? So it's just called, it's called sea dog? It's called a sea dog. It's a mix between a dolphin, which we don't eat,

and a hog, which we do eat. Something about the combination putting it in the ocean, it's totally fine to eat dolphin now. As long as it's a part of a, as long as it's pork, pork dolphin. I did not expect one of my picks to be taken in this draft. But it basically had. Oh my God. I thought you were you, like, as I'm describing it, are you starting to get nervous?

Like, this sounds a lot like what I'm thinking of. Yeah, I can't use mine. Wow. Interesting. Wow. Did not anticipate this happening in this draft. Nor did I. Yeah.

Sea Dog, I don't see on a menu, but sea pork feels like something they'd advertise that Long John Silver's is like their seasonal menu. The sea dog is a thing at Wiener Schnitzel. Interesting. It's a fish stick and a hot dog bun. See, this is different. This tastes a lot more like bacon than fish. Wow.

Does it, so does it have the characteristics of a dolphin, but it kind of has like a pig look or like what's the... It honestly looks a little bit kind of like a, like a, what's that thing they have in Florida that they tell you not to run it? Manatee. It looks kind of like a pink manatee with like a, honestly with a, with a dolphin's fin

and then it just kind of as a pig nose and it moves about as well as a manatee you got to watch out for them they're not the fastest or brightest animals wow oh so you took

two animals that are considered actually kind of smart and you made them dumb I just made them kind of slow and bone yeah yeah I'm gonna take these two brilliant animals

and we're just gonna fuck with them until we eat them yeah it's a lot of crossbreeding it doesn't yeah this is what happens hey hey that is what happens I hadn't considered making an animal dumber

That's awesome. It's easier to catch then. Yeah. We're breeding for food here. Yeah, I get it. That makes sense. All right, well, the sea dogs on the board. Gavin had to make an emergency change to his pick.

I have the next pick. It's my second round pick. And for me, this was an easy one. This is the other one that I thought of almost immediately when this combined animal's draft was proposed. And for me, that is pigeon rat from the Simpsons. pigeon rat sewn together

by Bart's evil twin it's a pigeon it's a rat it flies it hits the ceiling it tries to crawl on a hole it can't do that

it's the worst of both worlds the pigeon rat is now on the board for our combined animals draft fun piece of regulation trivia it is a clip of the pigeon rat that gave me the idea for this wow

Wow, what? Saw it online and I went, oh, that was a funny episode. I remember that. And then I thought, we should do that. It is a spooky season. Yeah, it was a Treyhouse of Horror episode, I believe. Yeah, time of this recording is just about Halloween, so. One of the good ones.

Yeah, pigeon rat, top of mind, pigeon rat. I had to get rat on here somewhere. Rats on the board, baby. Great pick. Yep, thank you very much. Andrew, you have no idea how long I've been anticipating exactly what we're going to get from you at the end of the second round in the beginning of the third. So, Andrew, why don't you take it away?

my next animal in this combined animal draft you want power you want strength you want force nothing embodies that better than a rhino but you also want speed you want agility you want quickness you want the fastest animal per leg in the world i introduced to you none other than the beautiful combination of both the rhino ostrich as you can see it is the power and strength of the face of a rhino on the body of an ostrich incredibly fast, incredibly dynamic. You gotta be on the lookout for it, but also petable, which is important for all these animals. Which you can tell because it's got this big, big smile. Yeah, he's very happy about things. He's gonna like destroy a wall and he's like, I'm gonna

let you know about it. He made the animal version of the charger from Leffordead too. Essentially, yeah, yeah, that's a great way to view it, Jeff. Fantastic. I've also got to ask, what is this, what have you drawn white on top of? to do these drawings? I'm looking at the bottom left of the picture and there's some sort of... Oh, it's the image I use for everything. I just, I drew over. It's got the same photo that I constantly build off of the one thing. Layer deep. Yeah. It's another layer. Do you think this would be able to lift its head off the ground? Uh, I mean, based on this photo I'm looking at, yeah, he seems fine. He seems like you can do it no problem. Based on this photo you're looking

at which is a drawing you made you think that it can lift its head off the ground well it's the only proof we have that it can so i'm going to go with the evidence that exists instead of uh you know speculating anything outside of that i mean why why would you reject the proof in front of you uh yeah i mean hey yeah you showed me and honestly if it's charging at me scary even though it might be pedible as you said yeah for whatever reason all of these animals are petable that I have. Oh, oh, good. Cool. Imagine petting the chin cougeter and you go from the softness of the chinchilla to the sleekness of the cougar to the scaliness of the gator. It's sort of like an all. It's a lot of good feel. I love this. The O is used in both words. That's a real nice

roll off the tongue. Yeah, that was that was really smart. That's a really good bridge. Rhinestridge. Rhinestrich is on the board. Andrew, you kick off our third. round, what do you have? Well, the third animal, you want another combination of all sorts of things. You want the ability to see at large distances. You want the ability to fly, because that's important. But you also, if you're flying, want to be able to rest comfortably. So I introduce to the world the Gerfalcimal. How do I spell that? G-I-R-F-A-L-L-C-A-M-E-E-A-E-A. A M-E-L? Yep. Gervalcimal.

And now let me drop the visual representation. Okay. So the Gervalcimal, it is the neck and face of a draft. It's sad. Well, yeah, because it can't see because it's a cloudy day while it's flying. It has the wings of a falcon.

Those black things are wings? Yeah. Those are wings? Yeah, those are wings. Why is one on the top and one on the side? You know, listen, I didn't create the creature. I'm just looking at the photo. that exists here. You didn't create the creature? No, I just, I found it in the wild. This is a photo, clearly. Um, it's definitely not to do with the fact that I'm not an artist or know really how to

draw in any capacity, but, body of a camel, wings of a falcon, head of draft. Now, when you're flying, what's nice. Now, typically, in a normal day, if you encounter a cloud while flying, you can't see if you're a normal person. With the draft can poke its head above the cloud, can see forward. Now, unfortunately, there's a lot of clouds on the day that this photo was taken. So the draft sat about it. He's unhappy. He's unhappy. But that is, the Drafalcimal, very petable camel. I've never pet a camel. I assume it's pedible. I assume it feels good when you sit on it. So what's the camel part of it helping out with? It gives you a place to sit securely because people ride camels. It's true, but how are you going to sit on the, you know, between the

hump if the wing is there? I think the wing's not there. It's just like, poor representation. Yeah, I think it's a poor drawing interpretation of the wing. Imagine the wing is in a position in which you can drop your feet down and not impact it in any way. Okay.

Is it the dromedary that's the one hump? The what? How many humps does this have? It's got two. It's got the front and back. It's the body of a camera. Okay. I see it.

Yeah, dromedary has the one in Bactrian. I don't know. It's just we just call them camels, man. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah, that's fair. Yeah. It's just camel, one hump, camel, two hump, dude.

Yep. Jerfelch. Jerfel. Gerfalcimal. Like, ger like giraffe, right? Jerfalcimal. Yeah. Jer falcimal.

Well, you were calling it a gufalcimal. Yeah, you keep seeing gur. Yeah, well, it's because it's written gur. Like giraffe is written like, like, you know, G. And so. Yeah, your falcimal. Got it. Jepalcimal is on the board.

If you had gerfalcimal, you have to. to erase it. I'm very sorry. And you have to erase this next one also. I'm making my third round pick. It's a very easy pick for me. It's the zonky. The zebra donkey that you can go down to Tijuana and C. He's wearing a hat that says Mexico. It's the zonky. I've never seen the zonky. Oh, yeah. Yeah, big time. People love, people love the zonky. People are naming teams after the zonky. the zonky, I guess, a tourist attraction. Here's, I'll show you some more pictures, children petting the zonky.

The zonky's just kind of hanging out on the street. I will say, I think the zonky looks sadder than my Jurfalcimal. Oh, I don't agree with that. Look at how excited he is. He's happy to be watching. He's yours around. He's having fun.

Yeah, there we go. There we go. Now, here's the thing. You're thinking, oh, my God, that's crazy. They just have this, it's this like the zonky guy or whatever. The thing about the zonky guy, represented also as a mascot. Incredible zonky.

Many are saying the zonky is an unstoppable animal. So the zonky is my third pick. I also like saying zonky. I think zonky is a fun. The zonky scratches the itch like the Rizzler, where it's like it's just something about it, saying it makes me feel like good in my brain. How many zonkies are there?

Well, here's the thing. The zonky is a real actual hybrid animal. Yeah. Um, it is, it's, it's, it's very cute. It is a very cute little animal as a baby, but the zonky that I'm drafting is, uh, the Tio, specifically the Tijuana Zonky. And there's a baby, you know there's only one of him. Only one zonky.

But one zonky in the world. Um, Jeff, if you had zonky, get them off the board. Off the board, uh, won't pick them. Okay. You pick something else? Yeah, hold on. Let me look at my notes. Okay, cool.

Uh, all right. So, we have made. the oceans a safer, more food-filled, porky place. I'd like to turn attention to land now. About 150 to 200 years ago, we had a bit of an oopsie here in America where we discovered that bison were delicious. And so we hunted them pretty much to extinction. A lot of people confuse the bison for the buffalo. They're two different animals, but they're very similar. They're often interchangeable. And for the purpose of this pick, we're going to go with the buffalo, which is not as endangered,

but is approaching endangered in 2025, because it rhymes with what we want to do. I'm going to reintroduce this animal into the American wilds, but we need to make up for lost time. Buffalo just don't have sex as quickly as some other animals. So we're going to do a smaller, safer buffalo, a faster-producing buffalo.

I'm going to combine a rabbit and a buffalo. to create the ruffalo. We're going to let them loose in our grasslands and we're going to let them populate very quickly. The ruffalo. Is the ruffalo a smaller buffalo? It's a mix between a rabbit and a buffalo. So imagine a smaller buffalo. I think it probably weighs in around 75 pounds. Oh, okay, cool. But with rabbit ears and a little rabbit tail and it eats carrots, lots of carrots, but that's okay. Is the ruffalo what the things and where the wild things are? are called? Well, I was basing it off

Mark Ruffalo, but it could be. Yeah, I think you're thinking of Mark Ruffalo, which is not... He's not in that movie. No, but I... Mark Ruffalo is not in that. Mark Ruffalo was the little boy, I thought. Okay.

I'm thinking of the gruffalo. Oh, my mistake. It's its own kids book. Yeah, it's a completely different thing. Gruffalo is a giraffe combined with the Ruffalo. Yeah. It's Jeff and I combining forces.

The Gruffalo. Yeah. Incredible. Well, the Ruffalo is on the board, and I hope they populate our planes in wildlife. And again, very food-based, right? Like, looking to eat these things? Is that the goal? No, not a cent. Well, if we're going to eat them, we're going to farm them responsibly. We're certainly not going to over-farm them like we do. We're not going to repeat our past mistakes. So I'm sure they'll make their way onto some menus, but it'll be very responsibly and sustainably farmed. Okay. Okay. Well, there you go.

to know the ruffalo it's on the board nick you have your next pick it's the third round i've hit a food and i've hit a horror going with something a little cuter this time uh it's it's an animal of legend that was actually created uh quite by accident a taxidermy incident i believe is uh one way to describe it i'm going with the jackalope combined funny well it's actually a jackrabbit with deer antlers on its head and uh also the name of a cool bar you down south where I hung out with my wife when we were first dating. Also the name of a bar where Gavin and I think were you there Gavin when we saw

the mat the rat jump from one it like thumped down onto like a box of gloves or something on a showman. Excellent. Yeah, spent a lot of time there. Yeah, big rat, big old rat. Two in the afternoon order and lunch. I looked I think I looked at the rat and then I looked at Gus and

Gus looked at me and just shrugged. And we ordered and ate. Yeah. You know, it's a rat of the jackaloupe, rat jackalope. It's a different kind of animal, but it's even, it's even stronger. Jackalope is a good pick. It is like, I think it's an animal that a lot of people know. I think a lot of people know what a jackalope is.

I think there are probably a lot of people out there that probably think the jackalope is real. I think so. Yeah, you just can't listen to them. Thanks for those two brothers. Yep. There you go. Crazy that you could do that. It's something, that the world was so nothing at some point that you could just go put

antlers on this rabbit. We're changing the world. And then they did. But that's the end of your pick for the third round. We go now to Gavin with his last pick of the third round and his first pick of the fourth round. Gavin, what do you got? Ooh, these are some great combined animals so far.

But I'm not seeing anything particularly heroic. And that's why I would like to combine the manatee with a bat. I give you bat manatee. I like that a lot Speaking of good word feel Batmanity feels good to say That's a really nice one Rolls off the tongue

And what is that creature sort of like Like what is it? What is it all about? What does it look like? That kind of thing It looks like a manatee But it talks real gruff-like And it has a cowl So imagine the face of Adam West On a manate

It's kind of right and wrong So your idea is that it has bat wings or anything, you just, it wears a cow. It wears the cow, and it wears the eye makeup under the cow, and then, uh, it blends in with its other manatees when it's, uh, got time off. Where are they? Fright of me! There's nowhere to put a bomb in the sea!

Oh man, I can't wait to, I can't wait for this video to come out so I can finally see what the, uh, the drawings of these animals are like. This is going to be awesome. Yeah, it's going to be good. Gavin, you've had three picks, but you only have one left. So if you have so many to choose from, you better make it count. Your fourth and final pick, the best combined animals draft. Well, it was originally going to be a Pish with Pickfish, because I just felt like I wanted there to be some sort of bacon-flavored sushi to eat.

Wow, you guys are the same fucking person. Definitely. He's sea dog to me, so I've been sort of scrambling and I've come up with something. I'm not really sure how offensive it is, but we'll see. see if he gets by. Oh. Offensive? Have you heard of the water bear?

What? Have I heard of, have I heard of the what? Yeah, yeah, the water bear. Yeah. Have I heard of the water bear? It's the tiny microscopic, it's called a tardigrade.

Oh, oh, the little, yeah, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Got it. I would like to combine that with the powers of the Ardvark. I give you the Tardvark. Um, like I said, that was a scramble. The thing is, is like, I would have never thought of it in an offensive way, unless you set it up like that.

No, yeah, I don't know why you would do that. Wait, you would, you would hear, you would hear Tardvark and not think of an offensive word? No. Not in the context. Sounds like somebody's combining tardigrade and artwork to me. Okay, fine. I guess it passes. So what is it, what is it like? What does it look like? Or kind of like, what is it? Let me see.

It's an ard vark with a really gruff voice. Yeah, I think maybe it's just an odd vark that can live a, you can survive in space. It's an ardvark that can survive in space? Yeah, it goes into like sort of ultra-hybernate, how a hibernation state, and then you can wake it up later. It's an ard-vark that can survive in space. That's what it is.

That's what it looks like? It's got the powers of a tardigrade. Yeah. Okay. But an ardvark. Yeah, but it's got an ardvark mouth instead of its weird, like, suckhole. Got it. Well, right.

I thought that it had that when you said it was an ardvark that can survive in space. Yeah. There you go. That's what it is. What a board. These are the best combined animals for sure. Undeniably. Yeah, and we're not even done yet.

We still have four more picks because Nick has his fourth and final pick of the Best Combined Animals Draft. Well, I've touched on a few things, but I really want to appeal to the audience here. And this is one that I have not seen this. I didn't watch this particular thing while it was on television. But I hear that our audience may be fans of this. And apparently, they're big fans of what this character is. I've heard great things. So I'm going with Nina Tucker, aka the chimera dog from

full metal alchemist. Wow. It's a combined little girl and dog by her dad because he needed to keep a job, something like that. I don't know what it was. I didn't see it. So you did use a human.

In a way. In a way. In a way. In a way. It's a chimera. In a way. It's a chimera dog. Combo.

Girl human. I mean, that is, you did it. And there it is. You used a human. It's so far the only one that's used to human Although when you see bat manatee You think that might have something Nope

No no no or or you're looking at the board Ruffalo could be no no no no no no no has nothing to do with him Nope well I don't know he does talk a lot like a human man dressed as a bat Hmm But he's a manatee Mark Ruffalo Right and this is a dog dog girl Well chimera dog from full metal alchemist is on the board

Nina Tucker And I do think that I do think the audience will resonate with that. I think a lot of people are going to have a lot to say about that specifically, unless it can be topped by Jeff right here with his fourth and final pick of the best combined animals draft. I'll be honest, this is a tough one. I'm down to my final seven picks,

and I can only pick one. I got some real bangers in here, which is why I want to present an idea to you guys at the tail end of this. Okay, we fixed the oceans, we repopulated the American West and our grasslands are Midwest.

I'd like to do something nice for a group of people that have very quietly just been solid neighbors. They've been pleasant. They're inoffensive. They're wonderful. They never really ask for anything. And to top it all off, they gave us

Jim Carrey and Andrew Patton to just two of the biggest gifts I've received in my life. I'm talking, of course, about the country of Canada. I'd like to do something nice for our neighbor, because I'll be honest, I feel like we haven't been very nice to you the last couple of years, as is evidenced from the lack of Canadians drinking our whiskey and going to Las Vegas anymore. And so in an effort to repair these tense relations and these hypercharged political times, I'd like to help give you a gift of something that your country kind of singularly

loves. I don't think it's the greatest thing you've ever created, but it's definitely one of the most beloved inventions of your country. That's why I'm going to mix a mouse, an inoffensive, cute little house mouse with an African hippopotamus creating the hippopotam mouse and essentially giving you a real life. Is it a pest or is it a pet version of the, uh, what do you call the North American house hippo? The house hippo. Oh, we got a real house. Yeah, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, gating the closest thing to a house hippo that I can in the hippopotam mouse. Another phenomenal roll off the tongue name. Yeah.

France gave the U.S. the Statue of Liberty. Jeff gave Canada this beautiful creation. The hippopotamouse. The hippopotamouse. I love it. It's the size of a mouse, but it looks like a hippo. Oh, it's so cute.

Yeah, I get it. And when I looked it up, it gave me this, just to be clear, that's not what it looks like. I'm just letting you know that when I Googled it, like when I searched, that is something that came up, want to be clear. That's not what it is. No. Maybe it's a little closer to this thing, very cute, fun, hippopotamus. Much closer to that.

Much closer to that. So cute. Yeah. It's pretty cool. Man, what a move. Jeff, thank you. The country of Canada as a whole thanks you so much. No.

Canada, thank you. Thank you for William Shatner. Thank you for Gordon Lightfoot. Thank you for Jim Carrey. Thank you for Andrew. Thank you for Raymond. Thank you for Johnny Caviar. Wow.

That top hit a pop a mouse. What is it? Hippapops a picture. It kind of looks like a slog from Abe's Odyssey. Yeah. I can see that. And you know what I love about you, Gavin? Is you're the only person that would make that reference in the world.

You said it and it was just like, dude, it's over my head. I got no idea. I love it. I love that you carry a torch for that game. It's great game. Love it. Well, hippopotamouse is on the board. Only two picks left. We go to me for my fourth and final pick.

I'm staying in sort of the realm of words that feel good to say. With animals that do exist, this, my friends, is the Geep. It is a goat sheep hybrid. It is incredibly rare, but it does exist. It is a baby Geep, the little Geep, the Geep. Maybe keep. Wait, so a goat could shag a sheep? Yep.

And do you know what happens when that happens, Gavin? How does it happen so rarely? Geep. How does it even work? I don't know. Here's the rare geep. Their families keep them apart. It's culturally.

Yeah, it's like a Romeo Juliet kind of thing. That's to blame my mind. It's got a goat eye, but sheep fur. Kind of a goat head, but kind of a sheep head. We love the geep around here. Oh, the keep is so cute. Yeah, we love the geep. Big geep heads.

A very rare animal. The Zonky, the Geep, feels good to say. What a crime-finding duo. That's a zonky in the Geep. Do you think these animals exist in Goof World? Would they be in the Goof World Zoo? They should.

Yeah, absolutely. We're working on it. We're trying to get it done. I can drive the little train and go, on your right, it's the Ruffalo. Until you left is a field of Geep. Well, we've made all of our picks, except Andrew, who has the very last pick here

in the best combined animals draft. Andrew, what do you have to close us out with? Well, you're talking about good to mouth feel on these animals. And that is not going to be... Just to be clear to the audience, I didn't say that. Andrew, Andrew said that. I sort of, everybody has been saying it.

The last animal of this draft is another that a can't. Cantorchula, a can't or chula, C-A-N-T-O-R-T-U-L-A. Now what we have here is we have part ant, part tortoise, part cat, part tarantula. Oh, let me drop this visualization for you, so you can see. As you see, it is the face and head of an ant. Oh, no. With the neck of a turtle and a shell, a turtle shell, but then the legs of a tarantula.

and a big fluffy tail like a cat. Why does it have 10 legs? Because I googled trantula and that's how many legs I saw on it. Well, that trencher's eight. Well, I don't, you know, listen, I don't know what I saw then. Yeah, you want this to be a can't tantula or a can't

tantula. If it wants two extra legs, it can do it. Let me look at this. Let me pull this up. Let me put it. I like the turtle with the transparent neck. You know what? I think it's fangs. I got confused by the fangs. I I thought the fangs were legs.

Well, just sharpen up the front legs, and then you're good to go. Yeah, there you go. Yeah, well, maybe it's just some fangs. Maybe it has fangs as well. It's double fangs on its shoulders. Yeah, it's a double fangage. I think it still works. Now, this was the last one I made, and it took me four drawings to figure out how I want to articulate this.

So I did the colors of what parts were what? Orange cat, red ant, green turtle, black, Oula. I want to make a kid's book With all your drawings It did what I was doing this Give me a thought of It would be funny to do a segment I was trying to think if I have any friends

That have like a five year old Where we both get the same word prompt And you guys have to decide who drew What is being presented What you are the five year old Yeah like we both submit our submissions For the prompt And then you guys have to try to decipher

Who did what Isn't that just basically play a jackbox game with a five-year-old. Is it? Kind of. Yeah. If we gave submissions for animals? I know who's not submitting,

and that's the Cantorchula, because it doesn't know how. It doesn't know how? Ten legs, but no knowledge. Well, I thought it had ten legs. Turns out it has fangs. It has shorth effects. We just discovered.

Gavin, the scientist, brought it into the lab. Gavin the scientist. That's it. Yep. The classic scientist. Well, guys. That closes out the best combined animals draft. Let's go down the board.

See where everything stays. It is Andrew with the chinkugator, rhinocstrich, giraffe. Hang on, giraffe falcimal. Girfalcimal. It's the hardest one. Cantor Tula. Those are Andrews four animals.

Nailed it, Eric. Good job. I have drafted cat dog, pigeon rat, zonky, geep. I feel like those are things to, like, activate a sleeper agent. Yeah, absolutely. Jeff has drafted the Scarity Shark, the Seedog, the Ruffalo, and the hippopotamouse. Very nice. Nick has drafted turducken, pred alien, jackalope, and the chimera dog for full metal out.

Gavin finally has drafted the armadildo, the tampon, the bat manatee, and the tard vark. Guys, those are the animals draft, the combined animals that we came up. with any honorable mention I have a whole other board that let me before we mentioned that uh before we go into that let me let me let me let me proposition this to you guys uh I'm gonna write down my own mentions here someone in the comments for a video I saw recently I think it was on Patreon but I can't remember specifically said an honorable mentions draft would be a really cool idea where the pool is all the previous honorable mentions from other drafts which I thought is actually a pretty interesting

idea. But I would say almost impossible to enact going backward. But if we started it here and held on, if everybody held on to our honorable mentions, maybe in like, I don't know, seven or eight drafts from now, we could do a round of honorable mention drafts. And then we would draft from the pool of our own honorable mentions. I like that idea. Can I, can I propose something? Because I had a, I had maybe a similar idea that wasn't exactly this. I kind of wanted do a one more thing draft where the pool is it's very similar to the honorable mentions thing but instead of going forward it's going backward to all of our other drafts and you just draft one more thing that you would have wanted to draft in any of those drafts but you don't

have to explain what draft it was from you can just pick something that you're like damn i wish i would have gotten this one on the falls draft so you can pick a fall the pool is everything that went undrafted in all of our previous drafts that you wanted one more thing on. I've had some dropped balls. With all that said, I feel I can share

my what would be honorable mentions because it's a completely different board. It's for a different game. What does that mean? I mean, I think it'd still be funny if you drew from that and then we found out about that in three months,

but go ahead and share. It's just it. I don't think they're fun picks, but they are, they are like when I didn't know what this was, I came up with two lists. I came up with the Shikugator list.

My other list features things such as cockroach, bullfrog, bulldog. Oh. Oh. Lion fish. Real animals with combined names. Yeah. I wasn't sure if that was the angle or if we were doing Island Monroe style, as they say. Okay.

I like that we've all thought of potential or different ways to go about this draft. But we all kind of settled in the same place. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I think we all settle on the best idea or the most creative idea, probably, like using humans from full metal archimists. But every idea was valid. It is interesting that there are so many different interpretations of how this could have gone. Yeah. I can't get out of my head the image of a pred alien eating a turduckin and what they must feel about it. Incredible. I think they feel pretty good about it. I'm blown away that at no point did I think that I could combine more than two animals.

same never crossed my mind as soon as Andrew had a triple I was like oh that would have opened up a lot of windows Gavin I'm in the same boat he said the alligator thing and I went Jeff you fucking idiot maybe we are the same person

I sat at a coffee shop this morning for a half an hour just trying to come up with more ideas and just trying to fucking ram two different names together over and over again if I could have thrown a third one in there it would have blown my mind what a draft I'm so excited to see the audience reaction to this. Yeah, I'm really excited.

And you guys can let us know who won the best combined animals draft here. You'll watch this video and you'll know if Gavin drew his animals and we put them in later or if he didn't do it, this is, it'll be easy for you to understand right away. Spoiler. Yeah, spoiler. He didn't do it. I feel like it got poo poohed a little bit by the host of this video. Yeah, I mean, again, it doesn't make for better content.

No? You somehow both said that in a way that was retaliatory and also a question. You're the most confused argument I've ever heard. Well, there you have it, the best combined animals draft. That's what we have. We didn't share honorable mentions because we'll probably use those going forward. Thank you so much for watching. Let us know in the comment.

Vote in the poll. Let us know who had the best combined animals. Check out the gameplay videos. adrian.com slash the regulation pod. Let us know what combined animals we miss that you really wanted to see on here. And we'll see you next time. Bye. Bye.