F**kface - Crisps

Episode Date: September 23, 2023

The long awaited Crisps ranking is here. Geoff, Gavin, and Andrew have selected 4 (four) of their nation's greatest crisps (chips) to go head to head in a taste test. Join Geoff, Gavin, Andrew, Eric, Nick, Graysie, and special guest Becca as crisps are crunched. What's a nik nok? *~* CRISP CHOICE SPOILER*~* Gavin: Pickled onion monster munch Frazzles nice n spicy nik naks Twiglets Geoff: Ruffles Queso Kettle Jalapeno Zapps Mesquite BBQ Zapps New Orleans Style Voodoo Andrew: Lays Ketchup Hawkins Cheezies Ruffles All Dressed Old Dutch BBQ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Visit dragonsdogma.com to buy the game and start your epic quest today. That's D-R-A-G-O-N-S-D-O-G-M-A.com to learn more. Hello and welcome to another supplemental piece of face content. You've been waiting for this one almost as long as we have. This is the International Chip Challenge. And not only are we going... What is wrong with you? We have never called it that.

It's been months. And we've been calling it crisps. If it's a challenge, too, it's the easiest challenge. The challenge is who's got the best chips. Okay. Let me raise the stakes a little bit, right? So we're all going to submit scores. What about this? I'm just going to float this idea out there. Whoever has the lowest

score can't return to their home country or they have to leave. What about that? For how long? Set some stakes. I'm going to forever. Forever. Permanently. You live in Canada. So what if you or I have to leave the country? Yeah. If we're at the bottom. Listen, I'm not

going to be at the bottom of this, so I don't care. Set the stakes, whatever. I'm pretty sure you're going to be at the bottom of this, so I don't care setting the stakes, whatever. Dude, I'm pretty sure you're going to be at the bottom of this. No, I'm going to win this fucking competition. I got facts. I got passion. I got ketchup. It doesn't matter. None of that matters.

Here's what we're doing. Apparently, it's not the International Chip Challenge. It's the Crips of the World. Crips of the World Unite. Question mark? That sounds like a charity. Okay, and so what we're going to do is we're going to have everybody here eat the chips, but we're going to go in gag order.

Only three of us can rate them, and that is because there are more Americans than Canadians and Brits here, and we don't want the scores to be colored by country bias, even unintentional country bias. So we're going to go Gavin, Andrew, Jeff. Thanks for bringing in another American by the way there's so many and hold on hold on I'm not done yet

I'm trying to intro this so we've got Jeff and we've got Gavin Andrew and Jeff the three graders then as always we've got Eric and Gracie they're gonna eat as well

and Nick has never said no to food so we gotta have Nick in and then what for this episode and this episode only because we all know F*** Face

does not have guests. But I have filed a one-time regulation cast variance dispensation that has been approved by my producer, Eric Bedore. Special one-time.

So because we saw Becca Fraser walk by in the hallway and we bullied her into the room, she's going to participate as well. She's going to eat.

She's going to provide her opinions. Her scores don't count into the official ruling because she is an American and we can't have two Americans. I like the fact that the person who set the rule of no guests saw someone walking by the window and invited them on as a guest.

That's all it takes. What do you want me to do? I've known Becca for 38 years. I never see her. On the rare occasion I see her, I want to hang out with her for a minute. I was excited to see her. Don't get me wrong.

Yeah, I think this is great, but I do think we need to change the rules of no guests unless you walk by the window and Jeff doesn't expect you. There you go. In which case, you will be on. So if you want to be on the show, just surprise Jeff while we're recording.

Yeah, okay, that's fair. That's what the rule is. No guests or you have to walk by at the right moment and I have to like you and it has to be a long enough time since I've seen you. It's complicated, but it can be done. Becca, is it true that you've deployed your husband

to pick up the kids? I have. Very quick change of plans and now I'm here. Excellent. You know what I love about having older kids? I told Millie today, because I have her this week, I said, you'll have to figure out how to get home today because I'm stuck at work. She goes, okay.

And then I know that she'll figure it out. She's almost 18. She's smart. Is that what you do with your kids or no? No. Okay. My kids will burn down the house if they manage to get in. I got a text from Millie yesterday because Jeff lost his wallet.

Yeah. I did. I did. I was scared it was at your house, but I didn't want to bug you, so Millie texted me. You didn't want to bug him? I like to text Gavin. No, I get it I was scared it was at your house, but I didn't want to bug you, so Millie texted me. You didn't want to bug him? I don't like to text Gavin. No, I get it. Oh, what?

I don't like to text anybody. Gavin's been texting me Smee videos and Smee pics. Well, that's the relationship you and Gavin have. I hung out with Gavin Friday, and I hung out with Gavin Saturday, so for them to bother Gavin

with a text on Sunday, it feels like too much to me. Wow. I love him so much. He is literally next to my daughter and my fiance, my favorite person on this planet. I just feel like that would be

the person that you would bug. Honestly, it's kind of neck and neck between the three. It depends on the day. But like because of that, I just have so much respect for him and his personal time. I don't want to bother him.

I like him too much to talk to him. Does Jeff text you every day or? No. We talk about houses rarely. That's about it. Yeah, Beck and I have been texting recently about British toilets. Yeah. I have some opinions. That'll be the next challenge. Okay, we should

get into these crisps. Okay. So, the way that Jeff was saying this is going to work is we're going to start with the four crisps from each person. And then you guys are going to send me your scores. You won't reveal them to everyone. And we'll tally them all up at the end. Are they?

Is it one through ten or one through one hundred? One through ten. One through ten. And no decimals. No decimals. God damn it. No decimals. Then it might as well be a hundred. It might as well be a hundred. You're right decimals, goddammit. No decimals. Because then it might as well be 100.

It might as well be 100. You're right. That's what I always say. Nobody listens to Jeff. All I was saying was like, yeah, 1 through 10, we'll do like 8.7. It's like, no, then just do 1 to 100. None of this makes sense. Anyway, 1 through 10.

87.7. Okay. So, that is what we'll do. And we'll start with, it'll be gag order. start with it'll be gag order so it'll be gavin andrew jeff and you can talk about why you've selected these crisps what the point was and what you think so um let's forward gag order not reverse gag yeah reverse gag would be just otherwise it'd be gag and that doesn't make any sense yeah we wouldn't want to be backwards guy okay yeah take your pick what are we starting with? What's it gonna be?

What are these? What do you mean? Those are probably- I've noticed an immediate problem. Well, these are nuts, Eric. Nice and- That's what it is. Nope.

Knickknacks. That's nuts. Knickknacks. Those aren't shit. What did he ask for? All right, we'll start with- I thought that- I ordered the fucking thing. Is that not what it's supposed to be? God, no. Nick that's not shit What did he ask for all right? We'll start with Is that not what it's supposed to be God no that crisps those are nuts

Dude, I don't know don't look at me. I don't like I'm gonna I I think I'm on your side a disadvantage here I think I'm on your side. Why send you away all right wait. Why don't I got a lesson? I think I got the right product Andrew Andrew, it's Frazzles. All right, we're starting with Frazzles. Well, I just opened Knickknacks. Hold on. No, go back to Frazzles. Because, you know, it's the first one of the day. Let's get breakfast-y.

These are bacon-flavored Frazzles. Okay. I think that's the only flavor they do. Try a Frazzle. So why don't they just call them Frazzles? Just in case you don't know what you're getting into. Oh, sorry, Nick. So, um, these are corn snacks Oh my god

Stick your nose in and get a whiff Here's the thing I'll say about British chips Very bacon-y High smell These smell like dog treats 100% Why don't you chill your bean He has a point

You didn't chill your bean Alright now everyone except for Eric Because he's already done it Why don't we eat Our lovely frazzle crisp You ready Andrew? Now hold on Can Eric eat this again?

No I'll wait until everyone Has their second frazzle crisp I do appreciate that They kind of have like Bacon lines on them Oh yeah Oh yeah they do A slight attempt

That's definitely drawn on In his No way Yeah Alright ready? Everyone? I think so Here we go.

Shouldn't eat right into the microphone. Should not eat right into the microphone. The crunch factor is important. I'm going to be scoring based on crunch. He's got an excellent point. I'm going all in. I'm going to eat a second frazzle. Get a few going. It really gets the...

It builds. I'm already slacking Okay Now I should say Frazzle In my slack Yeah I mean I'm I'm keeping track

As we go So it's up to you Eric Frazzle And then I'll I'll text the number I won't say it out loud People will know it

I want it to be a secret Do I Do I score my own? Put it to you quietly Definitely. Do I score my own? You gotta score your own. Why would you not? And no decimals. No. Okay.

Okay. Alright. These are... It kind of keeps... If you stop eating it, it's weird. But if you keep eating it... Yeah. No, I agree. i think if you stop eating it seems to swell in your mouth a little yeah there's a little bloating going on but um i i don't mind the texture at all oh excellent i like the texture i like the crunch but i will say the more i eat the less i like it it's interesting there's a drop off i will say on the back for the nutritional values it says typical nutritional values

interesting there's a range it does feel really bacon-y which is like you don't get that a lot in snacks like they're not what they're supposed to taste like and what they taste like don't often line up yeah and i feel like humans don't get a lot of bacon flavored snacks. It's usually. Yeah. Yeah. I have treats for us. I have received scores from Jeff and Gavin. Sorry. And Andrew simply sent me the word brazzle. I forgot. I got caught up in the bacon thing and the bacon flavor.

And I forgot to put a number in. I filled it in. He just went. I followed it up. Brazzle. Should we go to the opinions of Nick and Gracie too? Please. Gracie, any thoughts?

Love the texture, but they do taste like microwaved bacon. Very specifically. The more you eat, the better they are. So I'm just going to keep going. The opposite of what Andrew said. So if you combine both those opinions, normal. Okay, I have scores from everyone for

Brazzles. Let's move on to your next crisp. Second crisp. Oh, I go all of mine in a row? Yeah. I mean, we've been discussing it in that way for like an hour now. It was pretty

I think it was pretty painfully clear that's how we were doing it. I disagreed with I disagreed with doing it that way but everybody else seemed on board. Yeah, that's the opposite of what I said. Alright. Twiglets, everyone.

To me, it would have made sense to go Yeah. Sorry. We could go Rem Robin. To me, it would have made sense to go. Yeah. Okay. Sorry. We could go Rem Robin. Well, it's too late now. High in fiber. And you spell fiber like a British person.

Fibre. Fibre. Yeah, fibre. Oven-baked, not fried. Now, Becky, you were just in England. I was, yes. Did you have frazzles or? I know.

The only ones that I had were a prawn cocktail flavored chip. And then there was some other spicy chip that I got. We had our own little tasting. I got to be honest, this just looks like a British pretzel. Yeah, I will say in the back of the bag, it says gives you that distinctive knobbly shape. I don't think I've ever wanted a knobbly shape. These are very unattractive.

Oh, and it just has nutrition information. You don't like knobbly looking twigs? I mean, I think they warned us what we were in for. Yeah. No, no. These look awful. Knuckles. Yeah.

Yeah. These fucking suck. Oh, we didn't do all the pomp and circumstance of eating one at the same time. I just got yelled at the first time for it. And then it never it didn't happen. The second. Oh, these are so bad. Becca just went in.

These suck so much. Oh my God. What have you done to us, Gavin? These taste like they're burned. Why are you making us eat a bag of sticks? What are you doing? This tastes like eating the street. Yeah, I was going to say dirty air. This tastes like Christmas.

In England, a nice communal bowl on some coffee table somewhere. Christmas Day. If this tasted like Christmas. In England, a nice communal bowl on some coffee table somewhere. Oh, Christmas Day. If this tasted like Christmas, it wouldn't have made it in America. Are these intended to be flavored, or is this just their native core? All right, I got you. You got my... Oh, I definitely got it.

Is this what potpourri tastes like? I love these. These are great. Are you serious? Is this like a thing where you've had them your whole life and you're a little sentimental about them and you tasted them before you had better things? Is Jacob a beloved figure in England?

Since 1851. The taste, the initial taste is, like Gracie said, like dirty air. It's like the street. The aftertaste is, I don't know another way to describe it, but nature. It tastes like being in the woods, but specifically face down in the dirt in the

woods. It tastes a little bit like if you ate a stick from the woods that somebody dropped a cigarette near. Yeah. It's not the cigarette, but it's of the cigarette. These are

80% wheat flour. Remember those little weird wood chips that run like your elementary school playground? Yeah. You're eating a campsite. To me, they're kind of like a packet of cigarettes found in a canal that dried off. Okay.

Yeah. I can see why you'd love that. And that says Christmas to you. I will say that is kind of how they look. So you have to send me your score. His family used to do that time-honored British tradition where they would bury the presents in the canal and the kids would have to go dig them out on Christmas morning. Yeah. Okay.

Well, that's Twiglets. let's go to our next crisp wait what did oh andrew hayden right okay the next one they're terrible yeah no okay well let's do the next one is uh pickled onion monster munch okay now i believe i'm so sick of you making me eat pickled shit sorry but i just i had to vocalize i believe they temporarily made these smaller and then everyone complained and they made them big again. Okay. And I remember as a kid struggling to get my mouth wide enough to fit some of these in.

So, pickled it's Walker's, which is just Lay's logo, but says Walker's. Yes, but pickled onion is a flavor. I'm into this. Oh, the smell. Alright, everyone at the same time. This is another baked Do not smell! Onion is a flavor. I'm into this. Oh, the smell. All right. Everyone at the same time.

This is another baked corn snack. Oh, yeah. If you put your nose into the bag and just huff it, if you just huff it, you can't keep going. I'm liking it. Do a real deep breath. It's got in my nose. I guess that's the powder. Are we all eating at the same time?

Yeah. You ready, Andrew? Okay. I'm ready. These are big some of the powder. Are we all eating at the same time? Yeah. You ready, Andrew? Okay. I'm ready. These are big. These are big. Here we go. Three, two, one.

Oh, God. Oh. Jesus Christ. Hell yeah. These are the bomb. Oh, give me a fucking frazzle. I feel bad for everyone listening to this with these scrunchies. Oh, my. What the fuck is this called?

Monster Munch? Yeah. Oh, it's so good. These are good. I feel bad for everyone listening to this with these scrunchies what the fuck is this called monster munch oh so good these are good these are like amped up onions okay that's interesting and they have other flavors than monster munch not just pickled onion

there's the spicy one there's I think a roast beef one oh roast beef Nick. Oh. Roast beef. Nick loves that one. Nick's excited about the roast beef. Nick, what were your thoughts on that?

Oh, yeah. Nice and pickly. The guy that's looking like the Branston Pizza. When it comes to food... Nick's voice got so high there. Nick is a freak when it comes to food. Oh, nice and pickly. What? Dude, Nick likes all food. He's a high there. Nick is a freak when it comes to food. Oh, and I said pickly. What? Dude, Nick likes all food.

He's a weirdo. The only thing I've ever seen him eat that he didn't like was sir strommen. What's that? Sir strommen. That pickled in lye. It's like they package fish in lye and then put it in a tin.

It's supposed to be the smelliest thing on earth. It is the smelliest thing on earth. Herring goo. Yeah. So you all say. All right say You look like you hated those Eric I didn't like that at all It really It was the worst part of a pickle flavor

With the I didn't know there was a worst part of a Funyun flavor but it has it Now see I want to keep my opinions Close to the vest I don't want to give up how I feel about it until at the end. Why? Well, I don't know.

Because then you get an idea of how everybody's doing. You're certainly not going to remember. I liked them. Okay. Oh. I mean, you're not going to... I gave it a high score. You're not going to...

You didn't have to say that. I gave it an eight. You gave that an eight? Sounds like Andrew didn't go for the eight. Why would you... You don't have to give a score. You just told me eight? Sounds like Andrew can go for the eight. Why would you? You don't have to give a score. You can just say what it is. Okay.

I'm not giving a score. And lastly. I'm just trying to follow your leader. Yeah, and Eric didn't get me any knickknacks, so. Are we going to eat nuts? Yeah. I don't know what this was. How much Nick loves this recording.

Watch it be so much better than whatever it was you were going to pick. Nick, this is the. Watching you enjoy this has been the best part for me. These are from Thailand. I don't know. Wait, is that Thai? What is that? Show me the link.

I ordered the thing that I had. I don't know what to tell you. You've never even seen these before? No. Wow. Double crunch peanuts. Let's try it. I ordered.

Here's the thing. I had the link. I ordered knickknacks. Oh, that's knickknacks. Yeah, look. I ordered these. Get a refund. Doesn't look try it. I ordered... Here's the thing. I had the link. I ordered knickknacks. Oh, that's knickknacks. Yeah, look. I ordered these. Get a refund. Doesn't look like it.

They sent me knickknocks. All right. I'm just going to have to rip it and just pass the bag around. Oh, my God. What is knickknocks? What is knickknacks? They're double crunched peanuts from Thailand. Here, I'm sending you this, Eric.

Is this what your guy's thing looks like? Or did I get the proper thing? Oh, this will be an interesting variable here. That's got to be the right thing. It's Cheetos. Yeah, that's a knickknack. It's just Cheetos. Imagine we're eating those.

It's just Cheetos. So I'm eating a different thing than you. Yes. I ordered knickknacks and they sent us knickknocks. You didn't verify? You didn't check it to the picture? I don't know what the fuck these things are. You've got monster munch. It's got this thing I don't even

want to look at. Been in my office for so fucking long. And I just look at it every day and I go, I hate this. I hate this so much. Nick was like, are you excited to do crisps? And I'm like, I'm excited to be done with crisps. Dude, it's a shame those aren't yours because they're a banger. These are my highest scoring thing. I'll take it. Alright, let's go in. Incredible't yours because they're a banger. These are my highest scoring thing. I'll take it. All right, let's go in.

Incredible. Wow. Yeah, these are good. Are they real peanuts? Is this an imitation peanut product? Nick got it. Because I'm allergic. God damn it.

We should have this conversation in the hall then. All right. All right, Jeff sent me a score. Those are pretty good. I feel like I've had something similar. Andrew, what do you think? Yeah, they're called peanuts. I don't know if mine tastes the same. I would say that the knickknacks I had taste like a Christmas tree.

If I had to compare a taste to it. They'd probably go well with the Twiglets then. Well, it should be illegal for such a fun name to taste so shit. I love the name. It seems like a great time and it's just trees. Sorry. That's an aside.

Send me your score. These peanuts are really good. Congratulations on the nickname. This is a great bar snack right here. Andrew, let me ask you a question. Be honest. Did you like a single bite of mine? Yes. Yes, I did. I you like a single bite of mine? Yes.

Yes, I did. Okay. There you go. I'm looking at his scores. I can verify that. Gavin, I'm concerned that not one of these was a potato product. The way he looked down. But would you say that crispy?

You know what? It's interesting you say that, Becca. Because I was faced with all of the most amazing chip products in America. And I asked, like, is a Cheeto, does a Cheeto count? And they're like, absolutely. Very split. Cheese puffs, Cheetos, you can do whatever you want. You can have a Frito, that counts.

And I thought, no, I'm going to be a purist. I'm going to go with only potato chips. Not Doritos. Nothing else. Just potato ass chips. Because I wanted to be true to the spirit of this thing. I guess the corner shops of my youth were littered with non-potato products. They are in America too.

Yeah. Okay. So we have all of our scores for Gavin. All right. Wait. Now we go to Andrew. Andrew, which crisp will you be starting with? I think I'm going to, we're going to open with the Old Dutch Barbecue Chip.

Ooh, okay. What the fuck? Now, for some additional information, I emailed all of these companies asking if they would like me to bring up any specific points during this very official ruling, and I got a nonsensical reply by Old Dutch, so we will ignore you emailed their feedback

and they gave you a bullshit response they did yeah they gave me a bullshit response but old dutch this is a canadian staple this is your classic like at a baseball game chip okay like this is a vending machine chip it delivers on exactly what you want from that experience okay these are just so everyone at home knows, these are old Dutch barbecues. No, Santa Fe barbecues. Yes. Oh. I didn't know they were famous for their barbecue.

Do you think this says Santa Fe? Oh, what does it say? I can't even move it around. It's French. Savour de. Okay. From where I was, it looked like Santa Fe. Right?

You saw it too. I mean, I'm not even going to act like I can see. It's flavor in French. Okay. So this is barbecue flavored chips. Did you eat the chip without? No. Did you? Mm-mm. I'm making sure you didn't. That. So this is barbecue flavored chips. Did you eat the chip without? No. Did you?

I'm making sure you didn't. That's all. I'm just asking. I'm asking. All right, Andrew, you want to count us down? Three, two,

one. I was ready to bake three chips in by that time. Good chip. That's a good chip. That is a great value based chip. This is a very subtle barbecue.

Yeah, some would say not flavored as barbecue at all. What is this? Is this called spice? Yeah. That is such a plain. What? A little bit of spice to it. A little bit.

A little bit. That is the most plain chip you could bring to International Crisp. If you didn't tell me this was barbecue flavored, I would never, ever, ever guess barbecue flavored. I would maybe accept paprika flavored. If you think this chip is spicy,

you think whole milk is spicy. No, I'm saying there's a little spice there. I'm not saying it's spicy. There is a spice on it as in seasoning and spices and herbs. Right, as in when I pick it up

and then I have something on my fingers afterwards. I sent you my review. Andrew, as in when I pick it up and then I have something on my fingers afterwards. Dust on your fingers, yeah. Okay. I sent you my review. Andrew, what did Old Dutch say? They said something about like we make quality chips or something,

but it didn't make sense and it was very disappointing. They do. Hey, fuck you. I didn't say that. I don't want to hear it. You're very aggressive. This is like a served

with your sandwich at lunch chip. Yeah, absolutely. It's a passive chip. It's a Canadian. It's a very passive chip. This is like a served with your sandwich at lunch chip. Yeah, absolutely. It's a passive chip. It's a Canadian. It's a very passive chip. When you get this bag of chips with your sandwich, you go, I should have got the pickle. Yeah. I should have got the pickle spear.

No one has ever said I should have got the pickle. That doesn't happen. You just heard me say it. I've said that. Thank you, Nick. Of course. What did you think of those, Nick? It's like eating, if it was barbecue, before the grill is lit.

Mmm. I would say it's like eating the memory of a barbecue potato chip. You know what? Yeah. It's been a few years since the factory. When you stop eating them, there's a little bit more of a flavor. Aftermath. There isn't after.

Some would say aftertaste. I like aftermath. That's way better. Andrew, you got to send me your score. The flavor aftermath. Andrew, you gotta send me your score. The flavor of Aftermath. And Aftermath, I told you, when it's food, he's a fucking freak. I know, man. It's just so weird. What a...

This is the millennium of Aftermath. So, alright. That is Old Dutch BBQ. Gavin is going back to his Twiglets. That was a Frazzo. Get it right. Okay. Of course. All right.

Andrew, which is next? Okay. We are now, we're going to move into the Hawkins Cheezies. Now this is also a Canadian staple. Oh, I've heard of these.

You've talked about these before. I have. This is what I love about Hawkins. I did some research for this. They had one factory that they made in like 1953 burnt down. They made another factory

and that's just where they've existed this whole time. They do not pay for advertising, because that means they would have to produce more Cheezys, and they don't want that. That's also why it's not available in America. These are dense. This is a really heavy bag. You could kill someone with this bag.

It's a thick Cheeto. It's really heavy. It's a heavy Cheeto, yeah. It's a high-quality Cheesy. Also, not potato. Wait, so you're saying... I do want three of four, okay? I'm not going to take this potato. I don't know. Should I just go for a standout?

I don't want to go for this extra knobbly one. No, no. Get a classic cheesy. Yeah. You don't like a knobbly one? Well, I just don't want to... That's a good-looking one that Becca has. I don't want the ratio to be off.

I like the way everyone just holds them up. Yeah. It smells... This is the most Cheeto ass fucking smell in the world. Oh, God. No, it's not. No. This smells like Play-Doh.

Oh, it doesn't. It smells like Play-Doh. Oh, it doesn't at the end. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Interesting. Okay. You know what I do?

I never thought about that, but you're right. Okay. There's a little bit of Play-Doh. All right. Count us down, Andrew. Three, two, one. Enjoy. Oh, God.

That is a texture I wasn't expecting. That was like work to get. I will say Jeff took one bite, picked up his phone, sent me a score. That was instant. That tastes like a stale something. It's a stale Cheeto. Is it stale? No.

I think that's the flavor. I think that's just what they are. I really do think that's what they are. I feel like every fifth bag of Cheetos, you'll find one Cheeto in the bag that tastes like this. You're 100% right. That's why Cheetos are a superior chip, and these are Hawkins Cheezies,

and they come in a bag like that. I will say, for a cheese crisp, the off-the-taste isn't too bad. I feel like cheese can leave you with a mouthful of gack. This tastes like going to my friend Corey's house and swimming in his pool when I was like eight years old.

Does it taste like his gack? It tastes like Corey's gack. Weird. If you're saying these taste stale, I'm going to attribute that to the fact that they've been in Eric's officeacked. Weird. If you're saying these taste stale, I'm going to attribute that to the fact that they've been in Eric's office for eight months. I don't think that that's a fair judgment. These are not stale. It's not stale.

They're not stale. They're very, they're, it's crispy in a corn snack way. These are well within their eat by date. Did you look like this in his book? Yeah, it was just about that. Here's what I'll say. Here's what I'll say for Hawkins. Best, I think best of the container designs I've seen thus far.

It's a well-crafted bag. It looks like we're going to the circus. It looks old-timey in a good way. Yeah. You don't like that little Boston? Monster Munch is good. Monster Munch is number two. I hate Monster Munch so fucking much.

I hate him. I hate him. I hate that guy. I can't believe some of you are doing this without a beverage. I guess all of you have them. I need to actually refill my beverage. You want to step out real quick? Do you get something for Becca? Do y'all still have the Oyocha?

I'll take another Coke Zero, thanks. The green tea in the bottle? Love you. Stay sweet. Just water, some kind of water. Gracie, what do you think of Hawkins Cheezies? I do like that, you know, you eat Cheetos and you have to dig your nails between your teeth to get out the residue.

I don't have that. Oh, I do. I do. I do. Really? I don't. I don't. Which is a pleasant surprise.

Yeah. I think it's the kind of teeth we have. But I don't. I still don't love them. They're saltier than Cheetos. Yeah, I like it. Hey, well, Gavin's out of the room. We can all talk freely, right?

His potato chips were dog shit. Yeah, pretty bad. The only one that was good was the one he didn't order. I gave a zero. Yeah, I gave a fucking zero. That's a straight up zero. I mean, I just can't believe he brought that to the table. I mean, this is like

the worst pretzel invitation. I mean, you wouldn't bring a pretzel to this contest. No. This is here. No, because you're not an asshole, right? He's going to have to cancel his trip. He can't go back to the country. He can't. I will say while we're waiting, he beat these Hawkins

cheeses. Dude, I love these things. I'm not against them. They're really good. I'm not anti-Hawkins cheesy. It's the Cheeto that crunches back. Okay. They should use that. Write them an email. No, but then they would catch on and people would want them to make more.

No, but they don't care. That's what I love about them. I'm going to have to read about their whole business model after this. I do think the last time, it says 2019 on there, and I think that might be the last time they made these. They're just working off like the same batch. They're just going, this is pre-COVID Hawkins Cheezies, and they don't want to make any post-COVID Hawkins Cheezies.

I wish they tasted as good as the bag looks. Hey, Jeff. Just, they do. So they'd say better. Okay. No Coke Zero? Oh, did you want one? Well, you grabbed two. Dude, that was cool.

You flipped my... Eric just flipped my glasses. So, Gavin brought me a glass of water in a red Zoloc. Yeah. And while in the UK, I learned that one of the most common questions people have about Americans is, do you really drink out of red plastic cups? Really? Yeah.

Why do they ask that? That's just such a thing in the media. Yeah. Yeah. Yes, the media. That's the most fucking white trash thing, too. Yes, it is. How the fuck? Thanks, bud. Here comes Nick to get one. No.

Freak style. Okay. Andrew, what is your next tip? Oh, this is tough I'm gonna we're gonna go with the ruffles all dressed is the next one man I was gonna be so disappointed if

these weren't here this is an iconic Canadian chip these are a classic as a show that loves being in the lab this is where these came from they just decided one day fuck it why don't we just put every seasoning on a chip I have a version of that as well

it's definitely this is an in the lab chip in a way where I think the first time I ever had these I went huh pepper and onion so it's been a while since I had these but I remember it being like barbecue

but punched up opposite direction of the barbecue chips we I had these, but I remember it being like barbecue, but punched up. Like opposite direction of the barbecue chips we just had. These will taste like something unlike the other barbecue chips. Okay. Are you ready? Alright, count us down. Okay.

Enjoy. Eat the chip. No. Is that a countdown? Whoa. Okay. No. Was that the countdown? Yeah. Whoa. Not what I was expecting. Yeah, I like these. A lot of flavor. A lot of pulls in different directions.

I'd say a lot of flavor. I feel like this doesn't really know what it wants to be. I agree with you. Jack of all trades. What is this called again? I need to put it on my note. Ruffles all dressed. I love a ruffle chip.

I love, they have ridges. I'm for it. And I can't do, I can't do decimals, right? No. Okay.

All right. It is a, it has some sweetness. It has like a barbecue sweetness, but it's almost like a salt and vinegar. There's a little bit of like an onion. There's definitely salt. Yeah like an onion. There's definitely salt. Yeah. Very

interesting. Very interesting. Alright. I've rendered my score. That's pretty good. I like that. Yeah. It's a great chip. What do you think, Nick? It's good. It just feels like it's being pulled in a little too many directions to be perfect, you know? Stretch thin. That's fair. Okay.

Okay. I can see that. All right. And we have our final one. The final chip. Which of these is your favorite, by the way, Andrew? I would say the ketchup is my personal favorite. Oh, my God.

But they're all great. This was what I was hoping for, too. The Lay's ketchup. Here we go. Lay's ketchup. These were introduced in, like, 1983. They did a line where they're like, what if we make chips

in another flavor? And they released grape, orange, and tomato. What? And tomato is the only one that took off. Wait, was it tomato or was it ketchup? I think it was originally called... They smell like ketchup. I think it's the same seasoning, but they just changed it from tomato to ketchup. Now, I love ketchup.

I've heard of these. It smells like English ketchup. I've never wanted to eat them. It doesn't seem like a combination that goes together. We talked about this today that you've never had it. Yeah, never in my life. So this is being new for me. Yeah yeah nobody ever mixes fried potato and ketchup ever that's a really i accidentally put one in my mouth and then promptly spit it out okay let's do it andrew count us down yep okay enjoy the chip it's not this motherfucker does not know how to count backwards no i'm done with countdowns i did twice we don't how to count backwards. No, I'm done with countdowns. I did it twice. We don't need a countdown. Ew.

That is foul. I thought I liked these. Oh, it's gone. I don't think I know. Oh, what is... That just keeps getting worse. I need to put more in to get rid of it. Ew. I knew I wouldn't like that.

You don't like this, Nick? No. I've never seen... As a big condiment guy. It's a weird ketchup flavor. It's not... It's not too sweet. I can't place it. Yeah, you're eating more. It tastes like tomato paste. I'm trying to figure it guy. It's a weird ketchup flavor. It's not too sweet. I can't place it.

Yeah, they're eating more. It tastes like tomato paste. I'm trying to figure it out. It does. Yeah, there you go. Not sweet. Tracy eating it and then saying immediately, I knew I wouldn't like this. All right, send me your scores.

Jeff has sent his. That's like if ketchup came in a tin or some sort of can. Yeah, like canned ketchup. Yeah. Or tomato paste. Oh yeah, a little bit like tomato paste. That's a, you know, listen, you can come at me with my ketchup in a tin. At least none of my chips tasted like they came from a troll under a bridge.

That's true. So I have that going for me. Why don't you shove it up your damn ass? I think I'd rather do that than either. It was unfortunate that Andrew said that right as I was typing my score. Yes. We'll hit that delete button one time. All right, let's move on to America. Okay, I have everyone's scores in.

We've done scores for all of Gavin's, all of Jeff's, or I'm sorry, all of Andrew's. And now, we will do Jeff's. God bless America. Which would you like to start with? And that I love. Stand beside me and guide me. I didn't know that line. Through the zaps.

All right, we're going to start with a classic American zaps potato chip. We're going to do mesquite barbecue. Do we have enough for everybody or should I? We got to open it up and pass it around. Is this your only zaps? What's up? Is this your only zaps flavor? Hey, Becca, we'll have to wait and see.

Okay. Oh, my God. I can't. Oh, these are expired. Interesting. That's not my fault. How long ago? Oh, my God, Gavin. Two weeks. Oh.

I had to point out. He definitely had to. Oh, green. That'll kill you. See the green? There it is. It'll kill you. Okay. That's how you know it's a real potato. Jeff, you want to count us down? 3, 2, 1, go. You already ate it? Yeah.

These are definitely expired. Yeah, they smell like old oil a little bit. These are 100%. These are expired. Now, that's not the chip's fault. You can asterisk this one. It still tastes pretty good. Put it against the knick-knacks. Alright. You gotta send me your

scores. Everybody send your scores. I sent mine. Hmm. Well, it's definitely barbecue. Yeah. Moving on. Why are you moving on? I need scores. No, I sent my scores. Yeah. Why are you trying to rush your list? Are you in a rush? No, I'm excited to eat good chips, finally.

I need scores from Gavin and Andrew. Flynn, send your scores in. I'm just trying to imagine what they'd taste like if they weren't expired. Are yours expired, too? They are as well, yes. That's how long. That's how we do it in America. Yeah.

All right, just need an Andrew score, and then we're good to move on. I can't put my finger on what sucks about those. I think it's the exploration. Yeah. All right, what need an Andrew score, and then we're good to move on. I can't put my finger on what sucks about those. I think it's the exploration. Yeah. All right, what do we have next? Next we have, Gavin's already passing it around, we have kettle chips. Gavin, you're cross-contaminated. Kettle brand kettle chips.

These are kettle brand jalapeno potato chips. Once again, a pure potato chip. Okay. This is now, Andrew told you about a little bit of spice. Uh-huh. These are what actual potato chips with a little bit of spice taste like. Okay. You gonna count us down?

No, he doesn't. Here we go. He didn't count us down at all. It's a good crisp. They don't really have a lot of spice either. Oh, no, there it is. Uh-huh. Yeah, they build and they get you.

They build. They build. They're builders. I'd say a 1.5 to 2 second delay on that. Uh-huh. Oh, yeah. Andrew, what do you think? I'm not a big spice guy. Uh-huh. I think it's a good

chip. I just don't know about the seasoning. I think this is a great chip for somebody who's not me. Like, no disrespect to the chip. This just isn't something that I would get. These are very residue-y as well. They are. They stay on you for hours. You want that. That's later licking. Just don't touch your eye.

Oh, you definitely should touch your eye and your dick hole. All right, I've sent my review in. Mine's in. Got mine from Gavin. Nick, what do you think about these? I like these. I think I like the other brand of jalapeno chips better, though. Miss Vicky's?

I think so. Really? Yeah. I think they're too thin. They're a little spicier, though. They are. Becca's always. Oh, yeah. No, though. Miss Vicky's? I think so. Really? Yeah. I think they're too thin. They're a little spicier, though. They are. Becca, yours? Oh, yeah.

No, please, Becca. I mean, I have two chips that I usually go for, and it's either salt and vinegar or jalapeno. So, I mean, always a fan. Yeah, I think it's a great chip. I have to be in a mood, though,

for the, you know, accumulated spice. But in this small portion, it's quite perfect. What will put you in a mood, though, for the accumulated spice. But in this small portion, it's perfect. What put you in that mood? I don't know, a glass of milk? All right, should we move on? What are we doing next? All right, next up, we we're gonna do our version of the

what was it called? The Lay's All Dressed? This is Zapp's Voodoo. Zapp's appears twice on the list. I was holding my tongue. This is my favorite chip. This is Zapp's Voodoo. What they did is they basically took all the Zapp's flavors and put them into one chip and called it

Voodoo Chips. New Orleans style. Why are you taking so many chips when you eat three? I need to remember the other ones. Okay. All right, Jeff, are you going to count us down? Three, two, one, go. Oh, my God. Are these expired?

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. These are very expired now. No, only barely. These are a month. Oh, these are missing it. Oh No, only barely. These are a month. Oh, these are missing it. Oh, these are July. 17th of July.

And it's the 18th of July today on the recording. They still taste good, though. Yeah, they're still good. It's interesting because the potato's expired, but the seasoning is not. So it tastes good until you focus on the chip itself. I think it's the oil. Like, it's always the oil that does it. I feel like I'm being... My chips are going to be unfairly maligned because we got all expired chips. At think it's the oil. Like, it's always the oil that does it. I feel like I'm being,

my chips are going to be unfairly maligned because we got all expired chips. At least you got all your chips. That's true. That's true. Although the best

fucking review thing you had was you're not chipping. I think, these are going to score high, but I think these are an absolute disgrace. And I can't really put any more words in than that.

These are all over the place. They're good, though. Wait, what? I don't understand what you just words in than that. These are all over the place. They're good, though. Wait, what? I don't understand what you just said. They're going to score high. They're an absolute disgrace. They're good, though. Yeah.

Why even bother? I don't know. I don't know. He did say all over the place. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait. Oh, never mind. It's like UK date.

Okay. So those monster munchers are very expired. Becca was checking to see if the Monster Munch was expired because it fucking sucks so much. But, whoa, no. I liked the Monster Munch. Disgusting. Okay, I have scores from everyone now.

And now we have one more chip. All right, the final chip. This has been my chip du jour of late. I discovered this recently. I have been slamming these back. Go ahead and share those, y'all. Eric, will you share with Gavin? This is Ruffles with queso.

Oh, wow. Queso Ruffles. Smell when you open this. Classic ruffled potato chips. It's got the ridges. You can get these at H-E-B. You can get these at any grocery store in Texas. These have gone.

So it's a Texas-specific release? There's a lot of smell. Oh, it's a Sabritas. They're intense. They are intense. You want to count us down? Three. Just these two are expired.

Two. One. Oh. I love it. It's the best pay-as-you-ever you've ever had in your life, right? I love it. Holy shit, that's good. That seemed to find a new part of my tongue.

I'm going to put my score in. Didn't Ruffles have like a cheddar flavor? Cheddar and sour cream. Yeah. It tastes exactly the same. Oh, but it's cheesier. This is so cheesy. It is a very cheesy chicken. Andrew, thoughts? I don't know how I feel.

I'm trying to figure it out. I don't know. I don't have to score this. I think I like it. Immediately I'm thinking just question mark. Yeah, I'm with you. Question marks naturally turn into tens after enough time. It looks like a seven. I think if I wasn't from this country, this would be a weird flavor to me.

But if you are, you want to eat this. Oh, I'm from this, and I love this. I can't open a big bag and not sit and finish the whole thing while I'm watching sports. Did you say you're from this? I'm for this. I'm from this. I'm from this.

This is honestly what I'm from. And these expired on July 18th. God damn. Well, that's today. Slightly fresher than the ones. But the taste is still there. Yeah, they're really good. Imagine if all my chips were fresh.

Imagine if any of my chips were fresh. Yeah, yeah. So this just says guaranteed fresh until printed date. So they're still fresh. Yeah. They're still good. They're just not guaranteed. Okay.

We have all of our scores in for every chip. How would you like me to execute what we're doing here? Just before we do that, I just want to point out the stakes are you can never return home again. I don't know. That is something that you keep saying. I know, but in a contest in which the stakes couldn't be higher

over half, like somebody had a bunch of expired chips and somebody didn't even have their chips. I just love it. And again, the chip that he did have, probably his best scoring chip. Eric, how would you, oh sorry boss, how would you rate your producing on this segment? Oh, I hate this segment, so I'm 10 out of 10. Okay.

Yeah. Interesting. I'm just going to suck you my score. I think my producing on this expired in June, so. You're guaranteed good producing up to the middle of July. Mm-hmm. All right, you want to combine the scores and go gag? That is.

Gavin's combined score, Andrew's, and then Jeff's. So we are looking at, well, these are going to be neck and go gag? Gavin's combined score, Andrew's, and then Jeff's? So we are looking at... Wow, these are going to be neck and neck in all of them, too. I will say, Gavin's chips... Gavin scored his onion monster munch a nine, his frazzles an eight, Nick knocks an eight, and Twiglets a seven.

The Twiglets received a one from Andrew and a zero from Jeff. Are you shitting me? Those are the lowest scores of the competition. A zero? I only gave you a zero because I figured he would be a dick if I went negative. And that is true. If I could have gone negative four, I would have gone negative four. Eat that again.

Tell me it's a zero. I'll eat it right fucking now. It looks like a chicken bone. I was about to say that. That tastes like shit. I am eating a crunchy

cigarette. Not even a cigarette. A cigarette butt. This tastes like a crunchy cigarette butt. Listen to me. You hate white stuff, right?

You hate milk. I do. I assume milk would be zero. Yeah. You're saying that's milk? You're saying that's the same as milk? Yeah, I am.

All right. Any non-lunatics in the room who would rate that higher than a zero? The only reason I gave it a one and not a zero is because that wasn't the last of your chips, and I didn't know if the bar could be lower. I didn't know a chip bar could be that low, so I had to leave room for something being worse. Oh, that's so good. So, that was the lowest. The Twiglets, across the board, was the lowest rated chip.

Andrew rated the Pickled Onion Monster Munch a 3. Ooh, Andrew, you're an animal today. I just don't, I'm not a big pickle guy, and that was very pickly. It was like pickle juice, the chip. The rest of it, pretty in the middle. Total combined score, 70.

For adding everything up, putting them all together, 70. So that's where we're at there. Solid C-. What did you score the Monster Munch? I think I gave him an 8. On the Monster Munch, you gave it an 8. I liked the Monster Munch. I quite liked it.

Andrew went, Andrew's chips were second. Gavin gave the Lay's Ketchup a four. I thought that was a fair low score. I didn't think ones and zeros were flying around. That's how bad the Twiglet was. Wow. Okay. Yeah, no, I mean, if the Ketchup is a four, Twiglet, absolutely.

Not trying to be a dick at all. So if you're like, wow, Gavin gave the Lay's ketchup a four. Jeff only gave it a five. The Lay's ketchup really underperformed. I expected Lay's ketchup to be polarizing. I expected it to be polarizing. I wanted to like it. I like potato chips

and I like ketchup. Jeff gave the Hawkins Cheezies a four. Yeah, they were bad. Really? I didn't like the flavor at all. Yeah, but you're just talking about the cheese with the queso. I know. Big cheese guy.

I know, and it's a different thing. Fromage. Good cheese and your cheese. Gavin gave the Old Dutch Barbecue a five. Jeff gave it a six, and Andrew gave it a seven. I just thought that was interesting that you're all bunched up there. Yeah. I think it's interesting that Andrew brought a seven to the contest. Yeah, and Andrew gave it a seven. I just thought that was interesting that you're all bunched up there.

I think it's interesting that Andrew brought a seven to the contest. That's exactly how I feel. I gave one seven, I think. I can't give tens. I felt like it'd be an asshole if I just gave myself tens across the board. Interesting. That could give me a one, though. Interesting. Yeah.

So the total combined score is 75. Oh, okay. Just barely squeaked by. The kettle jalapeno for Jeff's chips. What about the all dressed? Oh, sorry. What's my highest rated chip? The all dressed, you gave an eight.

Jeff gave an eight. And Gavin gave a seven. There you go. So the all dressed was up there. I like the all dressed. Okay. The kettle jalapeno, Andrew gave a four. Mm-hmm. Wow. Gavin like the address. The Kettle Jalapeno. Andrew gave a four.

Wow. Gavin gave an eight. And Jeff gave a ten. And I stand by that ten. You gave yourself a ten, huh? I gave myself a couple tens. In fact, Gavin, he gave himself three tens. You're an animal. The only one knocking off the ten

Zapp's Mesquite Barbecue, which Jeff gave a nine. Yeah, they were only a nine. I don't know if it's because they were expired or what, but they were all expired. I feel like, I mean, you scored like an American. Yeah. It makes sense.

I scored honestly. If yours would have been 10s, I would have given you 10s. There was no bias there. It's just flavor. Wait, what did Gavin give the peanuts? The surprise? Oh, were the peanuts the surprise oh look were the peanuts

my highest scoring one yes I gave those an 8 Jeff gave them a 9 a 9 Andrew gave them a 7 which was his highest score well I had the real product

yep that's true and Gavin you gave them an 8 so yeah I gave you a 9 I really believed they were as good as the barbecue

yeah they were the best chip that you didn't want yeah from my home country of Cambodia or whatever. Thailand. The rest of the scoring for Jeff's chips sort

of six and sevens all around a couple of eights in there from Gavin and Andrew. Jeff's score, Ruffles queso, 10. Kettle jalapeno, 10. Zapp's mesquite barbecue, 9. 9 zaps New Orleans style voodoo 10. The score the summation of his points is 90. Wow.

How's he getting 90 point? There's four. There's four bags of chips and there's three scores. How's he getting to 90? I'm adding everyone's scores together. 6 6 10 8 4 10, 8, 4, 10, 6, 8, 9, 7, 6, 10. That is the way that these have all been scored. Who would have thought that having less Americans in the scoring would make it less fair?

Very interesting. And I'm proud to be an American. At least I know I'm free. Me and Lee Greenwood, baby. Even if. And I won't forget the men who died to give those chips to me. And I'll probably stand up and eat queso. Okay.

Ruffles here today. So I want to say. I love my chips. Why? You're gonna bless the USA. I don't know why you would end before the last line. Here's the thing about the score. You're going like,

wow, these sums are like crazy or whatever. They're fair. 15 points off on Jeff's. The thing about Jeff's scores is that even if you knock Jeff down two points in his own scores, if you go like, instead of 10, 10, 9, 10, you go like 8, 8, 7, 10. If you deducted eight points from his score. It still doesn't fucking matter.

Also, you gotta be, and I don't mean this as a personal assault to either of you, the British or the Canadian, you gotta be a real dumb motherfucker if you're bringing sevens and eights to your own contest. Like, where's your tins? Bring your own fucking tins, man. You got a whole country. I'm sure there's tins in your country. It just feels obnoxious. It's not a country of sevens.

But look at this. It feels obnoxious. I will give them a little benefit. Maybe not all of them were available for mail order. Oh, they were. Also, who knows if Eric even would have bought them. And also, I think the shapes are playing a big factor here. These are all very unique. A, who knows if Eric even would have bought them. And also, I think the shapes are playing a big factor here.

These are all very unique. A knick-knack also would have been unique. And you're holding three things that aren't potato chips. Yeah, who gives a fuck what they look like? I'm back. I'm eating Jeff's Ruffles.

They're here. Oh, boy, I'm into it. Their queso are so good, man. Nick is going crazy on the Hawkins Cheezys. I like them. Dude, I got a whole bag here for you. That's such a dense bag.

I mean, we'll obviously have to come back for the knickknacks one day, the proper ones. Yeah. You can bring them back from England. Yeah, I'll do that. Maybe we'll do another round where the American ones, I pick no chips. I just pick shit like pretzels and Cheetos and Fritos.

And then you pick actual potato chips this time. Y'all should try to bring your worst and aim for the lowest score. Oh, God, that's such a space move. That's a really good idea. Old prawn. Worst chip challenge. Can I have Eric's job? Yeah. Absolutely.

So, I'm not sure what we learned here. I think I had what I confirmed my thought about American chips. They're very average. Like I think Jeff won on averageness. Like he didn't take any swings for the fences as far as I will say, whatever I'm in, I don't know one by 15 points.

I don't know what you're talking about. Didn't take any swing for the fences. I went, I had a queso specific chip. You'd never even heard of that. Cheese chip. That's a very popular cheese flavors of swing for the fences. How many queso chips do chip. You'd never even heard of that before, motherfucker. A cheese chip? That's a crazy... A very popular cheese flavor is a swing for the fences? How many queso chips do you got up there in Canada?

None. That's the whole point of this. That's right, motherfucker. But we have a ton in America. I picked a classic barbecue, which ended up being the worst one. I picked an everything chip, which you also picked. So don't... Yeah, I give you credit for everything.

No, no, I'm giving you everything. And then I picked a spicy motherfucking chip. though I scored mine even though I scored my more reserved I'm way more excited to walk past a shelf of crisps in England and pick out these things then the more bland shit that I find an HGV cause you're Overwhelmed by bad choices in the you're like you're like a shapes guy. You're definitely like a shapes guy Yeah, I mean though one of the ones I could have brought was the one where you build a tiny crisp car. What?

Why didn't you bring that? Transformers. If your country focused more on the flavor and less on the shape, then you might have done better in the contest. That is the thing. Like, you have great names. You definitely went on names.

Over index on names. I can't believe that I ordered knickknacks and they sent me knickknocks. I showed you the link. It's the link you sent. I ordered that. Yeah, you go screw that. Amazon does that shit. Yeah, the guy with knickknacks. Oh, shit, I'm out of knickknacks.

I had fucking knickknocks. Where are they, by the way? Where are the knickknocks? I'm sure Nick has them. Amazon does that shit. I bought a bag, a box of baseball cards from Amazon the other day, and I got a yoga roller and a pair of sweatpants. That's not close at all. Even close to what I wanted. Andrew, what do you think your conclusions are here?

What's your final sort of thoughts? I'm never going to buy chips in Europe, anywhere overseas. Don't blame you. American chips are as bland as I assumed. They're just inoffensive. They're fine. It's too

spicy for me. I'm happy with what I have. I think Gavin and I win on adventurousness in the chip realm. Oh my god. Yeah. Well, that's what I'm looking for in a chip. I want to go on an adventure. I prefer the adventure of winning.

Says the guy who gave himself tens. Yeah, because I brought tens. Why do you sandbag your own fucking score? Come on, man. What the fuck? Believe in your own country. To be fair, I rarely enter competitions expecting to win, so I'm absolutely fine with it. That's because you

British and you guys don't expect to win. In America, we expect to win. You brought Twiglets. I'm proud of that choice. I think Gavin brought a personal journey here. That's true. Christmas 1992, that is. Right there. That was a rough year for you, huh? You're glad personal journey. That's true. Christmas 1992, that is. Right there.

Yeah. That was a rough year for you, huh? You're glad you have Twigets? Was that the year you got your brother's hand-me-up bicycle for Christmas? Actually, I agree with that. I'm glad I had that. Yeah. I will never have them again, but I feel like that's sort of the point of this, is bringing in flavors that are region-specific that he enjoys but we don't because

that's we don't we don't eat dirt typically but they do i guess and that's fine the average like they the total combined score for twiglets was eight points are gavit everyone else is up in like the 20s and it really is eight for Twinkies. I don't think 0 should have been allowed. That's just nothing. Okay, we can give you 1 and it'll be 9. Bring you up to a cool 71. Oh, man. Well, I think we've done it.

Yeah, will you take us out from this thing? Thanks for tuning in to another piece of supplemental F*** Face content. We hope you enjoyed the chip challenge. Maybe you have some chips from your local location that you're really into. And if you do, that's cool for you. I don't know that I give a shit. I'm happy

for you. Do your own with your friends. Here's the real deal. Let us know. Tell us what your favorite chips are. We want to know. We want to try them. If we covered something from England or if we missed something from England and the UK because of poor ambassadorship, let us know what else we should be trying. I could do another whole round of this.

I'm sure we all could. We could definitely do that. Gracie, I'm going to need you to order a bunch of chips. Maybe you should bring some tins this time. And then we'll go ahead and get unexpired American chips maybe. That would be awesome too. We could just probably go get these at the store. Eric and chips, maybe that would be awesome too.

We could just probably go get these at the store. I'd be interested to know from the comment leave is if anyone has experienced this unique collection of chips. Who they think has won. Special thank you to Eric and Becca. Eric, thank you for letting Becca fill the

one-time regulation cast variance dispensation. Becca, thank you for sitting in and eating some potato chips. Sorry about your kids. Yeah, sorry about your damn kids. But every parent gets one, like, give me. It's true, it's true. Follow us at F***FacePodcast

on Instagram and on Twitter. R slash F***FacePodcast is a subreddit we don't run, but it's there. You can check it out. Do a chip challenge with your friends. And that's it. Go ahead. ahead oh and also listen to my new podcast so I'll write it's also a tin hmm can I write a tip

absolutely it might be the twiglets of podcast we don't know real weird off the math on that podcast goodbye Real weird aftermath on that podcast. Goodbye.