F**kface - D-Box Crew Family // A New Outskirts Bet? [58]

Episode Date: July 7, 2021

Geoff, Gavin, and Andrew talk about Producer Eric chugging a soda, British GI Joe vs Canadian GI Joe, Geoff's new bike tricks, and Gordon Ramsay Chef Blast. Want to contribute to bits? Email what you can do to [e-mail] Sponsored by ExpressVPN ( http://expressvpn.com/face) and HelloFresh (http://hellofresh.com/face14 and use code face14) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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at HelloFresh.com slash FACE14. This is a Rooster Teeth production. Is this 58? Yeah. Is this yeah 58 a face? What's everyone's favorite brand of honey mustard? I'll go first I really enjoy white spots. I don't I know they're a restaurant chain and not a brand They have a fantastic honey mustard Jeff. What is your favorite? I'd be honest with you Andrew. I'm not I don't like it Wow I don't think I've ever bought it from like a brand in a store I've had it on yeah, you know if I'm picking a sauce in a restaurant Maybe I'll wait, but I don't ever like buy the whole thing. It's weird to a store. I've had it on, you know, if I'm picking a sauce in a restaurant, maybe I'll have it, but I don't ever like buy the whole thing. It's weird to me, dude.

I like honey and I like mustard, but together, it doesn't, it doesn't, it's not a draw for me. That's wild. I respect that you love it

so much. I really do. Huh. I do. Oh, and Nick has an answer. He's got it locked and loaded. I, yeah, I don't know why I didn't immediately go to Nick for this.

Texas Honey Ham Company. Can I get Texas Honey Ham Company? Seems pretty local. Let's see if I can order that. I mean, I got salad cream. Do you know what I realized, by the way? What's that? What did you realize?

We went around everyone and did the soda chug burp challenge. Yeah. But I couldn't help but chug burp challenge. Yeah. But I couldn't help but notice that someone was absent. Mmm. When we did that. That's an excellent point, Gavin. So we're going to need to sort of round off this whole chapter of F*** Face today, probably.

I'm probably, I'm going to have to agree with you. Eric, thoughts? Yeah. So how is Nick gonna do this Nick already did it Nick did it Nick was part of the chug okay so then follow up question can I fake it like Jeff or do I actually have to fake it it's a great point I told you

it was gonna be a letdown if I did it because I've already proved that I can do it easily why do people think you have faked it I don't because there is... Okay, so Jeff's like, I'm gonna chug it, and then there's no... And he says, like,

I'm gonna try to do this so you can hear it. You hear nothing, and then a few seconds later, he's like, halfway through, and then there's, like, a second of nothing, and then done. Well, I assume Nick's just cutting out silence. Could be,

but I felt like even live, it was pretty... Yeah, see, Nick says true. It's because I don't make a lot of noise. I don't sound like a dying dinosaur when I drink like you do. I'm sorry. Oh, Nick couldn't hear the choking in the raw audio. Hold up!

I'm getting... Wow. I'm getting... Oh, Nick. Okay. I'll be right back. Nick, if you can hear Jack in the audio when we couldn't hear Jack, that is damning evidence. Because I was going to say, the fact that we couldn't hear Jack made me think that Jeff did do it and we just couldn't hear it.

If you can hear Jack in the audio, that to me indicates that Jeff didn't do the check. I believe that Jeff fully did it, but I'm willing to continue on the path that he didn't just so he has to do it again. It sounds like he's going to try it again. He definitely did it last week. I'm not sure about that. The lack of audio is fascinating. How is he not back yet? I just love, Andrew, how much you were just getting...

You were enjoying it so much as we struggled to even chug it. It was just like... Well, because you guys talked so much shit about how easy it was, and then it was a nightmare for everybody involved. Okay, listen. I'm going to do it again, okay? Here, listen to the fucking... It's Coke Zero.

Listen for this. Can you hear that? I'm going to open it. Did you hear that? Sounded real. Definitely opened it. Splattered me in the fucking face. All right, so now I'm just going to drink it.

I'm going to stop at some point to breathe, but I won't. Sounds like a sound of fuck you. Why don't you produce an audible hum so we'll know where you are in the stage of drinking and breathing. I'll try to. Turn on my camera. Suck my butt.

Alright, here we go. I'll take a fucking photo. I mean, that doesn't prove anything. We know you have a soda. The photo's useless. I'm going to record this. Here we go. I'm going to't all right here we go i'm gonna record this all right here we go i'm gonna record it all right here we go okay it's uh here we go record i'm actually recording

it's not like an action bronson type thing uh and i mean already sounds worse than it did last time oh i can hear it i can hear that theug that time. He's really making it count there. Silence again. Alright, it's gone. That was really fast. Yeah, I just did it. That was really quick. Oh, no.

Nick just said, on a second listen, I can hear the chugging. You didn't have to do that, Jeff. You didn't have to do that, Jeff. You didn't have to do it. God. I need to credit Eric with the masterful performance of being asked to drink a soda and then having this happen. That was a great, great move by Eric. It was quite the move. But that only works if we just move on and refuse to go back to Eric.

That's true. But we don't do that. No. Eric, you're up. I don't think I keep soda in the house. I can try to... You... What do you mean?

You're an American! I don't really drink soda. I can try to... What if I crush a Budweiser? Is that American? That's very American. That's like... All right.

Talk about something else and I'll try to... I'll go get a Budweiser real quick. All right, hang on. We'll be right back. Talk about something else, and I'll try to... I'll go get a Budweiser real quick. All right, hang on. I'll be right back. Nick's right. Nick's right.

You could favorite or Instacart it, and it'd be there in no time at all. Definitely before the end of the show. We can even vamp and run long. Yeah, I can have my neighbor deliver some. This has got to go 50 houses or however, the distance. God, i'm trying to share this stupid video and it won't share on the discord thing yeah well maybe we should save the eric

chug for the finale go out on like kind of set a tradition nick said it might be sparkling water not a soda what does that mean that means, like I understand what those words mean. Well, I think as long as it's carbonated. I think a sparkling water is fizzier than a soda. You do or you don't? I do. I would rather chug a soda than a sparkling water. I think if I did a sparkling water, it'd be even worse than what happened. I was doing, that's what I was doing.

I was doing, I don't drink soda. Wait, this just dawned on me. Wasn't the thing you're supposed to drink and then not burp? Yeah, it was the sparkling soda. We've been wrong the entire time with the soda. It's been completely off. But didn't Jeff just drink it and then burp immediately? Yeah, no, he lost immediately.

But he was just, you gotta go 30 seconds. The timer starts at the end. Yeah, I lost. I just drank it. Oh, I didn't know. I wasn't aware that that was an option. No, if we're doing this right, you need to chug two cans and then not burp for 30 seconds. Oh, that's insane. What an insane thing. No, I'm not aware that that was an option. No, if we're doing this right, you need to chug two cans and then not burp for 30 seconds.

Oh, that's insane. What an insane thing. No, I'm not doing that. It's totally doable. I just don't have two cans left. That was my last say. That's interesting. Everybody yelled at me

when I said I didn't have soda, but Jeff's going, no, I don't have two cans left. I just drank one on camera. Well, hang on. You could Instacart it real quick. Be here by the end of the show. But I don't need to because I've already done it.

Twice now. You didn't won. Eric, just do your bud. Crush your bud, Eric. Oh, yeah. Oh, is he doing cam? Yeah, I'll turn on a little camera for you. Okay.

Here we go. It's Budweiser King of Beers. This is the America can. So. Mm we go. It's Budweiser King of Beers. This is the America can. Mm-hmm. I also don't think I can do this. Like, I guess I'll try. Yeah, like, what is a chug? I feel like you can't remove the can from your lips,

but you can pause. Yeah, yeah, I just gotta keep slamming it. All right. Haven't done this since college. Cheers to you. Look at him bragging about going to college. Andrew, did you go to college? Look at the glug rate. He's glugging. No, I did not go to college.

Gavin, did you go to college? No. Well, I went to sixth form. Me either. I didn't even go to sixth form. Alright, it's down. 30 seconds. It's not Burp Jet. He looks in pain. Get in the mic, Eric. Get in the mic. We need to hear the suffering.

He does not look good. He's shaking hear the suffering. He does not look good. He's shaking his hands around. He's shaking it out. I think he's like trying to. Oh, no. Jeff might be right. Yeah, you lose the bird. Oh, no.

I lost it. I felt it. It went back down, and now my stomach's even worse. I don't know that I can burn. Oh, okay. There you go. You got it. Okay.

Okay. Oh, Jesus. There you go. Okay. Okay. Oh, Jesus Christ. This is the first time I think I've chugged a Budweiser without popping it with a key and then slamming it in the front yard. When was the last time you did that? 2008. Oh, by the way, did i tell you eric i i have a hard out after the uh the break shit you have a heart oh i think we both have the same hard out i was gonna ask if it's

if it's your hard out as well oh it's i we have the exact same hard out what's what's your hard out we have a group that sees movies that had to take a break for a while but now we're back in full force and it's an insane group of people so we went and saw Hobbs and Shaw I got asked by Tim G TPG from sales and he bro, you fuck with Hobbs and Shaw. And I said, and I said, I guess so. And he said,

you fuck with D box. And I said, I don't know what that is. And he said, bro, D box, Hobbs and Shaw. And I said,

okay. So I show up to a movie theater, myself, Tim G, Meg and Gavin. And that's the group. So Tim G, Meg, and Gavin. And that's the group. So Tim G hit me up earlier this week or last week and he said

bro, I can't wait to fuck with Fast 9. And I said let's do it. He said bro, D-Box. And I said let's fucking do it. He said I'm getting the crew back together. The D-Box crew is back baby! I'm so excited it's the dbox family you guys are honoring the movie it is perfect like right after we do

break shit we are like going and seeing fucking Fast and Furious 9 and D-Box with Tim G. I don't know, man. It's been a few years. It's been a few. I'm like legitimately excited. I'm so jealous. This is like a great experience. It sounds like an awesome time.

I've actually seen every Fast movie in D-Box since I moved to this country in 2012. And the first time was probably the roughest because i think i'd eaten something a little bit gammy earlier in the day was that with ben no i think it was with michael and lindsey uh i saw fast five in dbox i think with ben yeah i think that was a little bit earlier oh that was probably before i moved here but i i think i ate some gammy trudyies or something, or I had too many frozen margaritas or something. But I sat down and it did the little D-Box trailer

where it's like, ah, this is what these seats do, and they're like, shut the shit out of me. I was like, and then I was just like, I have to go and throw up before this movie starts. Because I was about to hurl in my seat. I ran, right before the movie started, I ran through up and came back.

And it was awesome. It was great. Before we get too far away, I have some questions I need to ask. Gavin, did you receive the same pitch? Did Tim Chee come to you and say, do you fuck with Hobbs and Shaw? Was it the same intro? How did you get recruited into the family? Well, I want to say that because I'd already had my perfect record of fast movies and dbox i think he was trying to seed hobs and shaw and i recommended dbox and

then he passed that on to eric and now it's just become the crew but how did okay i guess i don't see how he becomes involved in it at that point he seems like the dom toretto of this dbox family um and it's you're making it sound like he was an addition. Like you're doing this regardless and you just happened to cross paths. But that's the thing. Here's the thing. Fast and Furious is a group of people

who were already doing a lot of different things that have come together and now they are secret agents. So that's kind of what we're doing. We're all doing different stuff i'm kind of like the ludicrous of this whole thing okay definitely like been around but also you go but really what's he doing here so i feel good in my role was it was it tpg last time who took the poster he like got the free poster yeah oh he was so excited about a

free poster it was i just like that i like that this crew that's getting back together has never once hung out outside of a fast movie we have literally never all been in the same place again you can't the only time we've hung out is the one time seeing that other movie. The COVID happened and Tim went, bro, you fuck with Fast 9? It's going to be so good.

I'm excited. I'm so excited. We're going to open a bunch of cards and then we're going to go get shaken around. It's awesome. We're going to open cards. I'll quickly go make myself throw up, and then we'll head out.

I'm curious how many other people got invited to the D-Box family. This is a great thing. I hope it expands. Sounds like a pretty exclusive club. I can't wait for one of you to die and then come back two years later. I got invited to the Sunday Overflow event with Alfredo, so I'll be seeing you there. I'm going to that one, too, so I'll see you there. Everyone.

I reckon as well. Because then we saw Alfredo at a bar, and I bought Coronas, and I just went, it's family, and then we felt really good about it. What? It's interesting. You called them agents. I don't know what I'd categorize the crew as i feel

like they're a bit are they a family business technically like what well they've registered a company they got like an llc i don't i think they're a family business technically i think i was watching fast six no fast seven on a plane and there was one point where this girl like gave them information and uh they were like oh the our other team would have tortured you for that information and she's like i don't trust that team i trust you and i'm like they've gotten so big they have teams within their team that's insane that's crazy we've witnessed the expansion the first movie was about racing it was about stealing vcrs that was like the big heist of the first movie we've come a long way this is how governments are born can you imagine how bummed people would be if fast nine was just a racing movie

it's like a weird gi joe thing now like he's got a metal suit I'm excited I want to see you fast night now you you've you've excited me about these movies I mean they're great movies to begin with you played any of the games for fast yeah Jeff and I made a video I think in a yeah we played fast five five yeah oh the one that doesn't have like it's what is it like Tyrese and ludacris and Paul Walker are like the playable characters? Like Vin Diesel, I don't think, is in that game. I don't remember.

I just remember it was trash. It was really not great. It was really bad. The only good fast game was like the Forza tie-in, and it's not even really like, it's just the cars. But like the narrative, they put out a new one like a year ago that i haven't played that i own that i'm excited to speaking of uh gi joe and how much enjoyment we got out of sweden uh rutabaga do you know what the english version of gi joe is called i feel like when you say it i'll recognize it but i could not pull it like i couldn't just say it right now. What is it? Yeah, that's correct. Action Man. Nuh-uh. That's great.

It's Action Man. I like Action Man. Nuh-uh. So wait, are they the Action Men? No, just Action Man. Action Man? I think it's like another action team, I guess. I don't know.

But it's G.I. Joe? It's like Scarlet and Hawk and Hawkeye? I don't know. I think it's just like a British spinoff, and he has like real hair. Oh, it's a spinoff. It's not even a real. I thought you were saying that's what it was called. I thought it was like the cartoons. Like you have Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles.

Action Man. Action Man. Yeah, exactly. It's just like the dolls and stuff. I'm so confused about you. You somehow made this more confusing. Yeah, so what was, when you watched G.I. Joe the cartoon in England, what was it called? Action Man cartoon i didn't see gi joe i don't know great i just had action man this is like my we have gi's i know what you want from me was it leona waddell the basket weaver we're like i knew one thing about her and this is

yours that you know one thing and you have no other information about Action Man. I don't know, look up Action Man, I'm pretty sure it's the same thing, kinda, mostly. Well, you're saying it's exactly the same thing. Those are two very different things if it's not the same thing. If it's not the same thing, you just told me that there's a thing in Europe called Action Man. There is a thing in Europe called Action Man. Yeah, but the whole point was that it was a fucking G Joe thing and I don't think it is I think it's I don't think it is I looked up action man right now. It is a Canadian it appears

TV series Australia, maybe I'd let me I'm going to into the wiki 2000 action man TV series I feel like I owned an action figure for the Action Man. Is his name Max? The show is unrelated to the 1995 show. Is that what you're referring to, Gavin? Action Man is an action figure launched in Britain in 1966 by blah, blah, blah. It's a licensed copy of Hasbro's American movable fighting man, G.I. Joe. So it's a variation. It's not because it's licensed by.

So it's, I guess, technically the same, but it's different. so it's i guess technically the same but it's different or maybe they're just using the same pieces i don't know look now i'm worried that it's nothing to do with that with gi joe but it looks like it kind of is well it's i've i feel like somebody called an action man would fit under the gi joe umbrella as far as like what that content would be action man and gi jo.I. Joe, the same. We had Rescue Heroes when I was growing up, was our like G.I. Joe equivalent. But imagine, do you remember the PSAs in G.I. Joe of like, don't fucking leave the stove on?

Yeah, I've only seen like the funny redubbed ones from the golden age of the internet. Rescue Heroes was if they made G.I. Joe, but it was only the PSAs. It was just like, here's a group of like, kind of not really soldiers, but like firefighters and ambulance people and their superheroes.

They're gonna stop a fire. Or like there's a tsunami coming in. It was not really thrilling. Was that Canadian produced? It was, yeah. I don't want to say it was a Canadian cartoon. Action Man is a... It's a licensed copy of Hasbro's.

So I guess it's the same as... It's the same as the G.I. Joe doll, but it's not in the G.I. Joe universe? That make sense? I think they just took the doll and renamed it, but it's not actually G.I. Joe related. Yeah, no, I think it's its own separate thing, from what I can tell.

What does G.I. even stand for? General issue? Or government issue? Fair play. Game informer? Or game informer, yeah. What is HelloFresh? I feel like if you don't already know the answer at this point, then you've been living under a rock,

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That's E-X-P-R-E-S-S-V-P-N dot com slash face. It's kind of like a song. And you can get an extra three months free. Expressvpn.com slash face. Jeff, you're a chain guy. What's up? Apparently. You're a chain guy, apparently. That's what I said when you told me you're a chain guy. What's that? Apparently. You're a chain guy, apparently.

That's what I said when you told me you're a chain guy. What does that mean? I'm a chain guy now. I bought a chain, and I wear it, and I like it. And now I'm a chain guy. You're a necklace guy. Yeah, I bought a chain. I bought a gold chain, and I've been wearing it to test it out and see if I like wearing a chain.

And I do. And then I discovered that I quite enjoy chains, and I do. And then I discovered that I quite enjoy chains, and I'm a chain guy. Oh. This chain is a Cuban link chain, and I quite enjoy it. I think I might get another chain. Can we see a picture of this chain? I'd love to see a photo of the chain, and I want to say that

when Jeff said, I'm a chain guy, I bought a chain and I'm now wearing it, I immediately went to like Rampage Jackson chain level. i didn't think jeff meant like a necklace i thought i'll drop it in the discord i thought jeff was going full rampage jackson and i was all about it i was very excited to see you walking around i thought it was gonna be like blockchain or something no no no no i Andrew, I might be going in that direction. I mean, like, I might, you don't, nobody starts out as Mr. P.

It's the same thing. Those photos are identical. Yeah, right? It's better than that scene. That looks like... Who wore it better, huh? Who wore it better? It looks like a chain from Tiffany.

No, it's just a chain. It's like a guy's chain. And you don't got even anything on it. Are you not going to put like a pendant or something? Or like a gem? Like a charm? No, I got it. I got it on the internet. Or a lock and Emily has the key.

Or like a picture of Millie and me in a locket. No, no, just the chain just the chain i might get a bigger one though you should absolutely get a bigger one i don't know that i'll get one as large as rampages but i i i would like to add i i would like to at some point get to a i'd like to have enough chains where it's an issue with you so do you wear this to bed do you sleep in this chain yeah you just live in it you don't take them off because they're hard as fuck to take on and off so it's just on me 24 hours a day i've been wearing it for about a month now and i'm digging it yeah

usually keep it usually keep it tucked under the shirt so it's uh subtle you don't see a lot gavin for instance we we spent an entire soccer game together. You had no idea I was rocking a chain. You're wearing that then? Every second we get. There's no way. I've got to look at our selfie. There's no way. Look at the selfie.

There'll be a chain around my neck. It's probably tucked in my shirt, but you'll still be able to see it. Oh, I guess I didn't take a picture with you. I just took one with Millie. Well, that makes sense. I'm happy that you're a chain guy, Jeff, but I gotta say, this is like the most disappointing version of that lead-in. I didn't mean to disappoint you. I'm not sure how else I should have presented it to you.

I used language that Andrew specifically would understand. Andrew, the I'm a blank guy. So I said, I'm a chain guy. I was trying to speak to you in your vernacular. You do appear to'm a blank guy. So I said, I'm a chain guy. I was trying to speak to you in your vernacular. You do appear to be a chain guy. While I was looking for that picture, I found the picture I took of Jack at that football game by the way.

That is definitely Jack. Also, you have no idea how far away that actually was from us. That's really zoomed. We took a bunch of pictures and then we zoomed in and uh for about 30 minutes trying to find jack until we finally did since you are you are a chain guy jeff can i suggest some chains to you so maybe some things to add to your please

do your collection okay so i'm gonna go first of all with uh the classic stylish it's been around forever maybe a nice Squidward solid gold that looks expensive it's not it's like a hundred dollars oh that's also Patrick you're right you're right star that's Patrick I was wildly inaccurate what about

rocket power you fan of rocket power don't know that do rocket power look at them on a skateboard you like the skateboard do you like skateboard I'm not familiar with that brand that's pretty cool though

yeah those are top two the last one I have not a necklace but maybe you want to expand are you a ring guy you in the rings not yet well now you can be because a big achievement fan achievement

hunter with Xbox you gotta be oh boy round it out that seems more like an eric than a than me but i like it if you would have posted you wearing that patrick chain i would have been all about it i might do it who knows why yeah i'd support you gotta work your way up to it i feel like a chain is something you work your way up to you gotta build the kind of confidence and the kind of presence that allows one to have a chain. I don't think you just like you don't just walk out of the store. Yeah.

Looking like Rampage Jackson. I don't understand the path to that, though. Like, who did you see with a chain? And then you thought, yeah, that's me. You didn't just think I'm going to get a chain. I was thinking about Mr. T. Yeah. I was thinking about how cool Mr. T was.

Really? When I was thinking about Mr. T. Yeah, I was thinking about how cool Mr. T was. Really? When I was a kid. And then I was thinking about, like, how I always wanted to be like Mr. T. And then I thought, well, Mr. T, and I was like, he wore a lot of jewelry. And I was like, why don't I wear jewelry? And then I looked and I have, you know, I wear, I've always worn a rubber band. And I have my fart bracelet. And then I thought, like, well, my wrists are pretty full.

I can't get an ankle bracelet. That would be weird. The only thing left is, the only other stick I have to put something around is my neck. So I said, fuck it. I'll be a little baby Mr. T. How are you going to incorporate snacks onto the necklace? That's, yes, exactly.

That's another question, right? It's like, here I am designing edible jewelry, yet I don't wear jewelry. So I can only assume that over time I will glean some insights that will help. This is like gateway jewelry. Yeah, yeah, right? Like you gotta live it to understand it, to sell it.

What do you have to do to become someone who wears two chains? What is the elevation to that? Because I assume your next chain will be swapped. If you're saying like building up the chain line. I don't know. How do you achieve two levels of chains? I honestly don't know.

I'm just worried about you. The amount that you fall off your bike. I'm worried that that's going to get caught on something. And you're going to be just hanging from a bridge by your chain. Speaking of falling off my bike though. I did not fall off my bike today. Thank God. That's it?

That's your story? You didn't... Well, I've been working on a new trick. And today was the day. And I didn't fall. I did my trick. What is the trick? Did you record it?

Is there video of the trick? No, no, no. There's no video. But so like, you know, when I ride my bike, I have my route that I go. And there are some spots that I like to do fun stuff. When the bike rides. Yeah, the bike rides.

I like to do some fun stuff. Like the area where I go up the side of the hill or where I crashed in the snow. You still do that, huh? Oh, yeah. I still do it now. I'll be honest with you. I'll be honest with you. It took me a while to feel okay doing it again.

And then I did a babies for a while. And now I'm back to doing it. Now I'm back to bombing it at full speed again. So there's this other area where you come out of a tunnel and immediately it takes a hard right up a hill. But on the left is like a wall, kind of like a leveled embankment, kind of like the one that I wreck on.

But this one, it wraps away. So it's like convex a little bit, right? And this wall frustrates me because it's very inviting to ride a bicycle up. But because of the way it's convex, it's very easy to lose your rear tire and have it spin out from under you and cause you to wreck and that i would say that happens probably seven out of ten times i try to uh navigate this thing uh it's pretty common that i that i my tire spins out the problem is is like you come out of this tunnel and then you make an immediate right turn if you go straight where the right turn is that's a bridge over a culvert, like a drainage ditch that goes about four feet down.

So if you hit this, if you come out of the tunnel and you hit this wall to the left and ride up it, it's impossible to turn around and come down fast enough to make the path. You will either do one of two things. You'll either fall right off of it and take the four foot plunge, which I've done. That's not fun. You'll miss it. Go down the forefoot, just miss it, go down the area,

and then slam into the wall at about elbow length, and that sucks. But I realized today that if you just keep riding a little bit, no, I didn't realize, I realized recently, I was able to do it today, that if you keep going a little bit on that wall, and then you just go down into the culvert, you can, there's a lip on the other

side that's pretty tall but if you hit it fast enough you can jump it and then land on the path and then keep going in theory right now the problem with that is you got to hit that thing at speed um and you got to build that speed up going higher up on this embankment and then swinging back around bombing that and then you got to hit it hard enough because it's a top, it's like a teeter-totter, and there's no, like it's a real sharp berm,

and you have to jump it in theory and then do like a bunny hop over it or the bottom of the bike will definitely drag and you will fall. I know that because I tried this at quarter speed like a week ago,

and that's where I wrecked. Then I tried it at half speed, and that's where I wrecked. And then I tried it at quarter speed uh like a week ago and uh that's where i wrecked then i tried it at half speed and that's where i wrecked and then i tried it at half speed again and i wrecked in a different place and there so i've done this a few times and i realized that the only way to do it successfully is uh is to do it at speed and today today i said fuck it uh i don't have to go out of town for a couple days so I can handle a bruise or a scab. And so I just fucking hit it. I hit it full speed and I was like, who knows what's going to happen? And I jumped the shit out of it. It was awesome. It was like a movie. It was like rad and gleaming the cube all at once. I fucking, I was, I was seven feet tall and I had a giant penis by the

end of it. It was amazing. I couldn't believe I did it. What if we cut a sick trailer for F*** Face? I'll bring the Phantom and we'll film you do that. How much air is involved? Emily has been trying to get me to cut a trailer where I just spin out on my bike and go like, F*** Face, break shit. And then I haven't gotten around to doing it. But I think it's a great idea. I also think that you would look at it and go like, that's not hard at all. But it's been hard. It's hard for me. Hard for a 46-year-old dude. Requires a lot of coordination. Requires a lot of sketchy shit. I've already wrecked my bike like a hole.

But what's hard if you're not actually, I assume you're not pedaling. Yeah, you got to pedal to build up speed. Then you got to ride up the side of this wall high enough, then navigate down. And like I said, it's convex. So the back tire really wants to swing out from under you, which when that happens,

you're eight and a half feet in the air falling backwards down a concrete embankment with your bike going on top of you been there not great it's a lot to put together especially at my advanced age I'll be honest I listened to everything you said and I was listening to you know

the stuff about the culverts and the berms and stuff I if you asked me to draw a diagram of what you actually did I would have absolutely no idea at all i wouldn't even know where to start at what this looks like from like a bystander's point of view i'll take a picture next time i'm there and then i can draw the path i can draw the path how about that i i would love to see the video shoot of this i think it'd be a great trailer andrew you listened to all that right i did i yeah i listened i have no idea, you listened to all that, right? I did. Yeah, I listened. I have no idea. If you had to draw that, what would you put?

It would be a wall, and then I don't know what I'd do. A wall that you can ride up. Yeah, so it would be kind of a side wall, I guess, and then a loop. And it sounds like your trick is just ollieing? No, the trick is you come out of a turn, immediately take a left, ride up a wall. No, the trick is you come out of a turn, immediately ride, take a left, ride up a wall, go about eight feet in the air up on the wall, come down the wall, then bomb a culvert,

and then go up the other side and then jump it. Sounds kind of imagining like a bull, Gavin, you know, like a skateboard, like he's going up and then down. It's like transitioning into a half pipe kind of. I don't feel like I, and then jumping out of it. I can't imagine.

I feel like it's less impressive. We're going to have, I'm going to have to come out and film this. I need to see what's going on. I just, yeah, I don't understand what exactly how this works. And I don't,

you seem to be applying like your way to generate speed as part of the trick. And I don't feel like that's the trick. I feel like the trick is landing the air gap that you make the air gap is the most wall thing difficult part the wall thing is a little sketchy too i think listen if you'd wrecked on that wall as many times as i have you'd have a healthy fear of it that's fair but hey you look good doing it with your chain look fantastic well yeah i hadn't considered that but i appreciate that thank you yeah i do look i cannot wait wait for Jeff to be pulled by his automated bike when his chain gets caught in the sprockets.

Some woman's just going to be delivering cucumbers to the next house and just see Jeff be dragged down the street. If that were to happen, I hope to God somebody filmed it. Just a guy being pulled by a bike with no one on it. But he's doing all the work. Just putting all that effort into that bike. It's barely assisting at all. Yeah, I want to make that trailer. That sounds good.

Well, let's do it. I'm all about it, dude. I've been practicing this trick for a while. It's not too far from where you... Yeah, it's easy for you to get to, Gav. Pretty sunny this weekend. I'm fucking... I'll be hitting that. I'll be hitting that.

I'll be doing that trick every day between now and... Until I probably... Until I wreck, and then I talk myself out of it. I'll just go to that spot. You can just continue your bike ride. I'll just grab the shot,

and you just carry on. Just say hi. Please. The problem is, is now that I've done it successfully once uh i feel like i can i'll have to do it every time and then i'll just get then i'll just get braver and braver and faster and faster and then that's when it gets worse are you the kind of person that when when someone's filming you are you the kind of person who would hit it with even more speed or would you get nervous and slow down

because there's two types of people i would overcompens who would hit it with even more speed or would you get nervous and slow down? Because there's two types of people. I would overcompensate by hitting it with more speed. That's what I thought. Yeah. That's what I thought. Yeah. What were you going to say, Andrew? I was just hoping that you guys can do this this weekend.

I'm now excited if that is really in play. Is this happening this weekend? If I grab the phantom and bring it out there, I think we could do it. Fucking yeah, dude. I think this should happen. I will... I can't wait.

By the way, you were supposed to invite me over to go swimming this week. And midweek, it's Thursday. You never did that. What? I just remembered. I just remembered. Just now. Oh, I had other people over again.

God damn it. The chances are I know those people and they probably like me. Maybe Gavin doesn't like you. No, that's, that's, yeah.

It was meant to be a midweek hang. Andrew, I'm starting to pick up on the idea that maybe Gavin doesn't like me. It's taken it a while to sink in, but it's becoming

unavoidably clear. Nah, not remotely true. I think, no, this is what happened. You were like, you asked me, are you free on Thursday? And I said, but you're not, because we're doing this. And you're like, oh. No, I said, are you free on Wednesday? Because Emily's off on Wednesday, and that'd be the best day. And you're like, yeah, well, and I said, okay, just let us know. And you're like, yeah, all are you free on wednesday because emily's off on wednesday and that's be the best day and you're like yeah well and i said okay just let us know and you're

like yeah all right i'm gonna invite some other people over and then we'll have fun and then suck my butt yeah i messed that up i botched that didn't i i will say jeff i don't think you need to be worried i don't expect our friendship to exist outside of the recordings of this podcast i would say tomorrow but we've got to break shit and we've got to and we've got to d box and you got yeah you got other people i get the d box family yeah i don't think you should be worried jeff until gavin invites me ahead of you then you've got a problem when i'm getting an out of country invite you wouldn't come though even if you even if he did and you came i wouldn't find out about it for like six months anyway it's if you invited me in a non-covid world if if you invited me to a lunch on, let's say, a Thursday,

and it was a Monday, and I got the invite, I would make that lunch. So post-COVID, I can give you three days notice for an invite in Austin, and you'll be there? I'll be there. That's dangerous. You don't think I'm going to test? I'm going to test the shit out of that. Yeah, but then if I don't go, I don lose anything when is post covid 2025 that's a great that's a great point yeah six years from now do you know that andrew texted me the other day and he said he missed outskirts i did

i not even okay so this goes deeper than gavin even realizes oh i was just so i had the whole property brothers thing and they've done stuff to that app that is crazy that i don't need to get into but it's just they made some bizarre decisions on how that thing works you got some more pay to win it's less pay to win okay so i didn't plan on getting into it but so how you play property brothers if you don't want to spend money is whenever you fully upgrade a house you get one one hour of unlimited plays. If you don't do that, you have to wait for your energy to fill. So you'd have to be really smart with like timing. OK, I'm going to upgrade this house that I have one hour to make as much cash as I can to upgrade the next house so I could try to chain it. So I'm not having to wait for

my thing to recharge. I didn't really notice this. There were no ads in that game. Like typically when you play a free mobile game, you're constantly getting video ads. They had none. They finally added them. But what happens is you can either watch an ad to like gain energy or when you play a level, if you don't beat it, they give you an option of end the level or pay money to keep playing like five more turns or watch this ad and get two more turns. So I was like, I can finish this in two more turns. I'll watch this ad. I do it. I failed.

I couldn't beat it. Then I got the same prompt. You can watch as many ads as you want and just keep playing the level. You will never lose. As long as you're willing to watch an ad, you get two more turns. I did it for eight turns. You watched a ads.

I watched four ads. Oh, I got two turns per ad. I watched four ads? I watched four ads. Oh. I got two turns per ad. I watched four ads, did eight turns, beat the level, but it has completely ruined their microtransaction system, which is crazy to me. They don't care. They make your money off the ads.

But I just feel like they would be, I've never played a mobile game where you can't lose, and they've also completely negated the reason for spending money on it. They make money either way i don't know what why don't you see that i understand what you're saying no i get it but it's just such an odd way to do it like why even have the entire store they've rendered pointless i'm just have to watch a 15 second ad it's like they've given up on selling things that's what is interesting about i've never seen a mobile game do that maybe no one was doing the microtransactions that's yeah

i think that's logically probably what happened but i've never seen a game just declare like we our store is pointless do not spend money here just watch these ads keep playing so i've moved on to there's a gordon ramsay mobile game called like chef's blast oh my god this is a weird thing so it's playing that and he does a surprising amount of voice work for it. So I was like, this is ridiculous. You're solving puzzles. You're unlocking recipes. I think I could go two weeks just with the recipes I've unlocked is a weird kind of just random challenge idea I had.

But I'm playing this. And so I shared it as a joke. I like tweeted about it and then I made a team for it. So I posted in the discord like, hey, anyone who wants to join my gordon ramsay chef blast team this is what you search for and i woke up later and a bunch of people joined and there's a leader board for the team thing and it became super competitive and i ended up spending my whole weekend playing chef's blast i cleared a hundred puzzle levels in the first day and it just kept going just everyone got super into it and

i realized part of that is that i missed doing outskirts like i needed something competitive to fill that spot in my life and it turned into gordon ramsay chef blast people have gone mild they've beaten the game there's like 480 levels to chef blast somebody beat it like it's absurd how into it everybody got but it just turned to this is a joke to waking up of like this is now the most important thing of my life and i'm actually doing this because i miss outskirts as crazy as that there was something so special about outskirts from my perspective because i really loved your streams it was it was like my favorite tv show of the week but imagine if to get your tv show to come on, you had to play Halo better than the TV show could.

And then the TV show comes on. And then I'm so excited for the TV show to come on. And then the TV show just kicks you in the testicles. And then it's back on you for the next time. It's a really odd way to consume content. Does it have to be, like, was there something special about outskirts that made it unique to

that challenge or could you play any other halo level and just do it again you don't have to shoot anything yeah well in my opinion no I think we could do other levels it's just I'm waiting for Gavin to make that call if he wants to pick another level I'd love to do it I suggested ODST Andrew sounds desperate man he's playing fucking pay to win chef black. I'm playing chef blast. He's desperate. He's been, ever since Outskirts ended, he's been just coming up with ideas left and right, and they're all very good ideas.

But I still think the thing that would anger him most is losing at Outskirts again. Well, yeah, I talked. The problem with it, though, is, so before we did any of this, before F*** Face was even a thing, I got into an argument with somebody about who had a

higher leaderboard ranking in trials and i saw that gavin had all the best beginner times and i think i've talked about this already yeah i challenged gavin and i beat all of his times but one and i played it every day because trials is so easy to drop in and out of it was how i started my morning and it took me a hundred days to beat Gavin's time. I just do it every day. And you can't really do that without skirts. Like you need momentum. It's at least like an hour long commitment to even get a run. Like you can't.

There's a flow to it. So it's tough. I know you want to be that time. I just don't see you ever having a large enough block that you could purely dedicate to purely annoy me, to just annoy me. Yeah, I don't think it happens. There will be a time in my future where i can do that i think probably i think it'd be more interesting though if we just picked a different level you know what you know what andrew padson what if i go to

england i'm gonna have to quarantine for like 10 days or five if i if i do the test after day five uh-huh that might be all i need are you doing out are you saying for like an outskirts you're gonna send a new outskirts time maybe it's gotta bring an xbox five straight days of outskirts oh i think i can get that done oh you were so unhappy i i talked to you on that last day the day lost, and I've never heard you sound so depressed, Adam. It was sad. It was the end of something special for us. It was. And also, it's gone.

Those streams have vanished. Twitch has removed them. They, I guess, expired. So there's no VOD of that happening. Why didn't you save them? I didn't. Well, typically, they last like a month. And they changed their policies on how long they last.

It was like a week. Does that mean Donkey Kong's gone as well well oh donkey kong is long gone but nobody needed to see donkey kong i love this because i agree that with gavin that it's it turned into great tv my favorite tv of the last few years was when andrew was doing his uh winter winner chicken dinner monthly challenge in uh pub g and then those streams in uh in halo except it's even better for me because it never punches me in the face i just get to watch it and then get out so i would love it if you guys would strike this up again because i i i'll be honest with you man i'm a i've watched 11 seasons of survivor in the last three weeks and i could use a diff like maybe some variety i think the best part of when i

texted gavin that i missed outskirts i put a question mark on it like in my core i didn't mean to but my core was just like do you actually because it was terrible while you're in it is this like you're just remembering the good parts the fun of it but i would love to have another outskirts in our life. That was fun. One day. One day. We'll see. I mean, it sounds like it could be close depending on.

I told Gavin this. So last time we talked about this, you presented it as like I would be annoyed by it. And I was very much like, no, I'd be fine. I'm happy with where it was. I tried to get the time back. I wanted to do like the King of Kong thing, you know, where likeve weeb sets the new record and then billy mitchell has that like video tape yeah i just like submit some vhs tape of the new time i wanted to get a time faster than the 339 and just sit at that final checkpoint and wait for you and i just i tried and i was impatient i was like i think this might be it i got 340 i don't think I'll ever pass 339. So if you

hit like a 338, maybe it's like the minimum mile or whatever. Like, the bar will be raced. Oh, just getting flashbacks. It's a miserable time while you're in it. Ah, it's fun. It'll be fun. Think about how much fun everybody but you has. Why don't you try it?

I would love to see Jeff try it. Oh, no, it's okay. I don't have to do that kind of stuff. I'm going to do a sweet bike trick. I'll do that. I provide entertainment in scabs for F*** Face. You guys do the video game. Scabs and chains.

Yeah, scabs and chains, baby. And shit. And just literal shit. That's how you guys about my shit triangle this week? No. Fucking hell. So the other day I wake up and I see Arrow in the hallway

and Emily, usually I get up, she barks and lets me know sometime between typically about 5 a.m. and 7 a.m. Hey, dickhead, if you I need to go to the bathroom and if I encounter one second of resistance, I'm going to do it all over everything. You know, so I run out and I try to get her outside and I'm successful 99 percent of time. But this is maybe Monday or Tuesday. Emily got up to go to work and I slept in a little bit. And so she let Arrow out. And then I just felt weird.

And so I got up and I looked at Arrow. I just saw Arrow in the hallway. But something felt odd. I couldn't figure it out. And then I realized she was taking a shit in the hallway. So I ran in there and I was like, oh, no, the sliding glass door had been left shut. So I went to open it and like kind of run around her while she's dumping on the carpet in the hallway.

And I fucking, first off I kicked, I kicked the shit barefoot. So I got some shit on my big toe. Uh, it's like seven, seven 15 in the morning. I got a shitty big toe and I hit the,

so I just keep, I just don't break stride. I just keep running into the kitchen to get to the paper towels or something. How did you kick it though? Because surely you were looking, I was like, I was trying to,

I was trying to run around her and i just like she didn't shit the straight line anymore she's old and so there was that there was like it was a it was like a landmine of turds to circumnavigate and so i clipped one uh anyway and so i get into the kitchen and as i'm realizing there's a little bit of duty on my toe, I hit, I didn't see this because the lights are out, I hit the P and I slide across the kitchen on P.

I don't fall. I don't fall but I definitely do like Tom Cruise risky business but barefoot across the P and so I'm like, now both feet are just soaked in piss

and I still got the duty and I'm like, and I spring into action, I clean it all up, it's no big deal. Emily actually cleans most of it up because she was horrified. You keep going. You slide up the wall,

up the cold. That was it. That was it. Right. That was it. Then, uh, then later that day I was outside cleaning up dog shit and I was barefoot

and I cleaned up all the dog shit and I turned around and I stepped right in a big pile of dog shit that I missed. And I like i looked down as i stepped in it like it like it's like like squeezed up through my toes like i could see i just i just didn't think you know and and so there was like a p incident and then two poopy incidents right oh oh so that i count the p and the poop one together so then i was getting emily's car the other day because we had to take Henry. Henry needed to go to the doctor. Was it because of his sneeze? No, he had a funny sneeze around you, though. No, he has a it was a yeah, it's some other stuff. But and I guess he he'd been stressed out because he had to visit a cardiologist and he had to wear

like a special doggy vest. And he had maybe leaked a little poop in the seat and i didn't know it and i just sat right down in it and then emily's like uh hold on and then she ran in the house and ran back out i didn't even know and then she like gets me up and i realized that i've sat in in a little bit of butt squirt uh so that that was all in the span of two days and then it hit me it hit me that with the exception of those three incidents things have been going pretty well for me since i i got back from florida and i think i i think i realized that if i don't step on shit shit steps on me and that's that's when i realized that that's my place in the universe i gotta stop trying to avoid the literal shit in my life. That the universe will let me exist in a reasonably C plus B minus life manner.

As long as I stop trying to jump my station, trying to live above the literal feces and urine of of the universe that's not going to work for me right anytime i try to get a big head and i try to think like oh no i'm better than dog shit and i'm gonna i'm gonna i'm gonna live a life that doesn't require me to to to live in in mired in dog shit and in human shit and other kinds of shit uh the universe says uh it hits me it knocks me whack-a-moles me right back into the turds right so i'm just i'm just gonna embrace it and just be just i'm not gonna be better i'm not gonna try to be better than shit anymore i'm just gonna step on the shit you can at least make it easier and not be barefoot all the time i mean that is true you can

reduce how often i don't think it's i don't think it's out of the ordinary to expect to be barefoot in my kitchen in my hallway at 7 in the morning. I thought you were a sock guy. I wear shoes enough. I thought you were a big sock person. I had just woken up. I hadn't taken a shower yet. I hadn't gotten dressed yet.

I was in underwear walking, you know? I feel like a shoe, a sock is no better than a bare foot. Yeah, a sock in some ways would be worse and i think it's not and i'd have to wash a sock yeah i'd throw the sock away right and then i'd lose a fucking that was more of my annoyance that you called me weird for never being a sock person that's what that combo is about i issued the first and to my recollection only official face retraction over that is true i i apologized and it admitted the heaps of hypocrisy that I that I that I reaped on you.

It's I can only apologize so much, Andrew. That's fair. Would you like to confess now you didn't drink the soda before that? This is the first real attempt. I 100 percent drank the soda. It just and Nick went back and listened to it again. And he even verified that he could hear it. And just to prove this time time I couldn't post it on

discord for some reason so I fucking I posted the video of me drinking it in the slack you guys can watch me drink this stupid thing second one was verified I just watched it I was there he's drinking it he slammed it drank the shit out of it great joke

if I had more sodas I would do the two and do the 30 seconds oh does it look Eric just said it looks like a small coke was that a regulation can yeah it's 300 hard if i had more sodas i would do the two and do the 30 seconds oh does it look eric just said it looks like a small coke was that a regulation can yeah it's 300 hold on 355 milliliters 12 fluid ounces yeah yeah that looks regulation it's a good chug you're very faster i mean as far as timing goes get a nice view of the shelves in the background too yeah very important all right gavin came over and he saw the shells for the first time and then he uh he seemed to dislike my podcast setup he just kept saying i don't it doesn't seem like where you would record this doesn't feel right i don't know i just

bothered by it when i picture you doing this like when i'm picturing you right now you're not in there for some reason where am i where do you pick yeah i don't know i mean now that i've been now i've set foot in there i can picture you better more what okay but like right now i can't really picture andrew i've never seen andrew's entire room i don't think so i don't i don't really see him in my mind in like a i'd love to see in a setting like a blueprint of like what you think it looks like the setup that's a great question when you when I see Andrew's bedroom the first thing that pops into me I see a wall on the left is a door to the right is a bed with a nightstand with a bunch of things that don't

belong on it then on the floor on the left is a sushi container yeah in the bed is a keyboard that's as big as the bed and then behind me, I can't see it, but I assume is a desk and a fire extinguisher and that's Andrew's room to me. Yeah, I'm sitting in the bed

in the corner. It's got the eight pillows. It's got the keyboard. There is a bunch of just shit and sushi and minging. I probably like a mashed in muffin or something. No.

On the floor and then a fridge, a sauce drawer, a desk that isn't suitable as a desk, probably more of like a drawer thing. It's made of Lego. I feel like I could do you a diagram. I'd love to see a diagram of what you think.

We should both draw Andrew's bedroom. Yeah. I'd love to see it. Yeah. Okay. I want to do that. Okay. I want to do that. Okay. That's a great idea.

No, this is the top standard ears. Like, Andrew, do you picture Jeff in his shelf room? Like, whenever we're doing

these audio only? I picture Jeff as just purely in a room of shelves. I only see shelves. There's nothing else in the room. There's no door.

He records from an Ikea. Yeah, it's sort of like the end of Interstellar. We're leaning in Interstellar, but like the bookshelf thing, like going down, that's just all I see. It's just shelving everywhere is how I imagine Jeff's set up. And he's just looking between the books at just different piles of shit. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. That's what I see.

It's all just left socks and turds. Here, this is what you would see. That's a lot less interesting than what I see. It's all just left socks and turds. Here, this is what you would see. That's a lot less interesting than what I imagined. It looks like a nice space. I just picked up all my left socks off the floor, unfortunately. Did you tuck the chain back in? I don't see the chain. Did the chain go back under?

The chain's back there. I see it on the left. Okay. It's all right. Don't worry about it. The chain's always there. I see it on the left. Okay. Yeah. It's all right. Don't worry about it. Chain's always there. I'm a chain guy now. All right, so Andrew,

if we both draw your room, could you then turn around in your chair and take a picture of it for next week or something so we can cross-reference? Yeah, I could do that. Okay. I could do that.

So our homework is that we'll both draw a schematic of your bedroom. Now, can you give us any instruction? Like, obviously, like the nose at the top standard is, which were actually very good instructions, I thought. Okay. Can you give us any tips on the room? Yeah, okay.

You want me to explain the layout? Kind of like the key landmarks? Well, don't give too much away, but just like something that needs to be in there that you think we'll never get. Like, for instance, how many doors are in the room? Three doors. You said three? So bedroom, bathroom, and

closet? Four doors, I guess, technically. If you want to... There could be a door there. It could hypothetically be a door. There isn't a door, but there could be a door to that space. There's three doors

okay imagine something like a monster's ink door door at the front door at the front left door at the front right wait wait wait so okay so say say we're looking at we're drawing this from the perspective of if you had a webcam okay yeah are there four doors in the view i don't think you'd see any of the doors in the view if you had a webcam okay yeah are there four doors in the view I don't think you'd see any of the doors in the view if I had a webcam yeah I don't think you'd see any of the you might well maybe there's like no doors how many windows are in the room uh does it uh oh my god well technically two technically two and how many can we see from there like if we're trying to match jeff's picture i'm trying to figure out what the range would be of the webcam of what would be

uh you would maybe you would maybe you'd maybe see like half a window window at the back okay door to the front well not too far to the back door to the front standard doors I don't know I'm giving instructions you wanted me to not be specific

door to the front door at the top standard doors to the side everything you're doing is making it worse so the door is behind where the camera would be uh one of the door yeah one of the doors yeah i thought the camera was against the desk which was against the wall where the window is uh i know the wall so the camera is this room? How many walls do you have? Well, one, two...

It's a four. It's a standard. It's a regulation four-walled room. Okay, a standard box. Regulation four-walled. But somehow, four doors on one wall. There's... No, there's a door on every wall but one.

Okay. We got multiple doors. So we're looking at the wall without doors. Yeah, you'd see the door without walls. What? The wall without doors. Okay. Yeah, you know what I mean.

Yeah, wall at the back, wall back. This is like the end of Interstellar. What's at the end of your bed On the other side Like your bed It goes up against the wall And then if you were like To scoot off of the front of it

I've just fully moved Into the McDonald's And I don't want to admit it I'm just creating a space Where's the ball pit It sits to the back obviously Back left What if

What if I'm gonna find His damn apartment With his own instructions I'm gonna find his damn apartment with his own instructions gonna find Where is it his own room? Jesus Christ well you want me to be vague I could give very detailed instructions But you want to you gotta kind of figure out where things are okay all right Door is that you feel like we've got all the instructions What doors at the top where the doors are at the top? They're all where the doors go where do they lead? What do you know that what do you mean? They're at the top. Where do the doors go? All the doors are at the top. They're all at the front. Where do the doors go? Where do they lead? What do you mean by that?

What do you mean they're at the top? The top of what? Yeah, they're at the top. Well, the top of the, you know, if you're doing a space, doors at the top. Dude, that makes no sense. But they're not on the floor? What do you mean? Ceiling doors?

No, I'm doing it under the system of nose at the top, doors at the top. Oh. Doors at the top. And at the top. Oh, okay. Doors at the top. And then standard windows. Standard window. Well, it's a pretty... No, I think one of them is not a standard window. Is a window in a door a window,

or is it just a door that has a window? Yeah, I've had dreams of it. Does it count? So one of your doors has a window in it? Yeah, one of the doors has a window in it. Is it an external door? Does it go outside the house? Yes, it does.

Oh, okay. So you have a door. Thank you. This actually helps. So you have a door to your bathroom, a door to the interior of your house, and then an exterior door. That is correct.

I had no idea you had an exterior door from your bedroom. I have an exterior door. Well, it doesn't lead to... I can't just, I have a very limited space I can go to. And where are we on the, like, the appliances in there? Do we have the Keurig in there still? We have the Keurig in there. The waffle maker's in my kitchen now. I made a waffle recently, actually.

It's very good. Yeah, where's the piss lady in reference to this? She's to the left. Yeah, which window? She's to the which window okay the left yeah did you see her through the window in the door or through the non-standard wall great question it was the door window door window okay yeah wow never i'd never used the the window window this is this is changed this has changed the geography of your bedroom for me. I almost, I will say, I had a brief moment. I bought an ice cream maker at like 12, 20 a.m.

I had never, I was just like, I want to make ice cream. I bought one and then I went through the, and I thought I could put it on the other end table so I could have a Keurig to the right and an ice cream maker to the left. I have a fridge, I could store what I needed. And then I realized I don't know how ice cream is made. Ice cream maker to the left. I have a fridge. I can store what I needed. And then I realized, I don't know how ice cream is made.

Ice cream goes in the freezer. Yeah. Well, I could move it downstairs, but if I could just want like a little cone, like a cone for me, just to make a little small batch, I don't know how ice cream works. I realized it's a lot of effort.

I thought you just poured milk and like some chocolate and stuff. You've got to churn it up, haven't you? Yeah, it's like a whole process. Are you go like churn it up haven't you well it's yeah it's like a whole it's a whole process so it's are you doing like an old timey one no i googled what is the best ice cream maker and then i found it on amazon and it was pretty cheap so i bought it and then uh i i returned it or i canceled my order like an hour later because i realized that's not a life i want to live i'm not fully committed to the amount of effort it would take to properly use that thing. That's fair. Plus, you've barely...

But it was a consideration. You've barely explored pickling, and that was a passing interest already. Oh, I think, you know, I could be open to pickling. I had a surprise pickle, and I enjoyed... No, it was pickled onion, right? I had on the Wendy's Korean burger. Yeah.

Yeah, that was good. I could be into pickled things. I have some cucumbers Wendy's Korean Burger. Yeah. Yeah, that was good. I could be into pickled things. I have some cucumbers if you need them. Yeah? I'd love some. I didn't know cucumbers were pickles. I talked about that before, but that was a recent realization that blew my mind.

Okay, well, should we stop doing this? I think we can. I think we covered... Did you have anything else you need to talk about? You're a chain guy, you're doing tricks, Gavin's gonna film you on the weekend. What's for next week, Jeff?

Oh, I guess I still had the tooth thing. I got a, I do have a charger cheek. That turned out to be a real thing. But we can save that for next week

or we don't ever have to talk about my mouth again because I fucking hate talking about my mouth and my teeth anymore. Let's just say I'm not out of the woods. Let's just say there's a, let's just say there's been a hole in my tooth

for two fucking weeks, and it's going to continue to be there for a little bit. Can we extend just to anyone who is listening to this, I'd love to see your blueprints of what I described. Oh, that's a great idea. And maybe we can find the closest one. If people could send in what they think based on the instructions, how it looks,

and we'll value it. I might have to draw it from the top down. I'm done. I'm doing top down. Oh, obviously it's top down. Yeah. What way did you imagine it being drawn? I always assumed it was top down.

I imagined like a blueprint. Yeah. Well, I was just going to draw it from like what Jeff's picture looks like. I was just going to draw you a background. Oh, that would be weird. I think that's a strange way to do it. Well, apparently it would. There's no doors over there or anything.

Yeah. It would be a very boring view if you did that. I think you should do a top down, doors at the standard doors all well two of them are standard one of them has a window in it that's the exterior one okay so okay so the final piece of information i need if we're drawing top down okay where is your desk if i'm looking top down desk at the top where's your bed bed at the back bed at the wait you're facing you're facing up yeah i'm facing up oh god that's confusing me already all right the beds wait the desks at the top and the beds at the bottom yeah and the doors are at the top doors are at the top

and the external doors at the top external doors at the top and the interior to your house doors at the top and everything doors at the top all the doors are are top top of the area yes if you drew a line in the middle of the room across they would all be in the top area who would do that what so you're looking at door uh if i look to my left like i could see a door my peripheral i see a door i'm not looking at it but it's in my peripheral vision yes imagining a four-walled room with like four doors in one of the corners somehow i don't know how it makes sense it makes no goddamn sense gavin i'm so confused they're at the top all right three doors i'm gonna draw that one closet one that's important one closet closet doesn't have a door could have a door you could put a door there but could put a door there. Now, is the closet, if we're looking at the top,

at the fucking, at the wall of doors, you have an entire wall that's just doors. No. So is the closet to the left or the right? There's only one door per wall. They're just all at the top. Okay. Wait, as well, you went into your closet

to avoid the smoke getting in the fire, the smoke alarm, but it doesn't have a door. No, it's a walk-in closet. It's a little walk-in closet with no door. I don't know. I didn't design it. I didn't build this place.

You can put a door on it. How do you mean all four doors are at the top, but they're not all on the same wall? Three doors. There's no... If you want to call the closet a door that doesn't have a door that there's technically one wall with two doors but outside of that there is one door per wall and they're all at the top but they're not all on the same wall gavin i i hate

this i'm gonna have to listen to this back at like 0.5 speed it's very simple all gavin it's very simple all of the doors are Gavin, it's very simple. All of the doors are at the top, but they're on different walls. Yes, and I have four walls. They're non-standard windows, and one of them is in a door. Yeah.

Well, I've got one very standard window. One door, not standard window, I'd say. I'd say it's not a standard window. I should draw the room that I thought he lived in before this explanation, and then the room that he thought he lived in before this explanation, and then the room that he's convinced me he lives in now. They're very different rooms in my head. I can't wait to see these drawings.

I feel like, once again, like the nose thing, you guys said crazy instructions, or at least Gavin did. I feel it's very clear. I mean, based on the information I have, I'm going to draw a room that defies physics. Yeah, you're going to have fucking a ceiling full of doors Sauce tower also at the top. I feel like that's important. What's at the top sauce tower the sauce pyramid that I've built the sauce Construction your entire fucking apartment is at the top

My bed It's like a two-dimensional room He lives on one wall. It's like a two-dimensional room. It's the opposite of interstellar. I got my bed and my Keurig. I got my end tables. My nightstands.

It's not so stellar, is what this is. Do you sleep on a shelf on the wall at the top? How does it work? I sleep on a very comfortable bed. Surrounded by a thousand pillows and a keyboard. Bed at the bottom. Eric gets it. Yeah, it could be a Murphy bed. Surrounded by a thousand pillows and a keyboard. Bed at the bottom. Eric gets it. Yeah, it could be a Murphy bed.

Does not fold out. It takes up a lot of room, though. It's a king-size bed. It's a big bed, so it's going to eat up a lot of the space in the diagram. No, it's just the diagram. I'm saying it's going to

fill up a lot of space. It's not a big room. Bed takes up a lot of the room is what you're saying. I'm saying it's the majority of my room is bed, yeah, if you're going to the majority of my room is bad yeah if you're gonna measure it well mostly bed that's fair okay okay i'm gonna get to work on this for yeah yeah i'm gonna probably forget and then do it 10 minutes before next week can't wait so i'll get right on that next thursday well thanks for listening to this

episode of face another one in the books. Can you believe that Andrew's room was like that? I drank that whole Budweiser. What a crazy episode. I can't wait to see the trailer that Gavin shoots for Jeff's bike stunts. Find out what happens next time on the next episode of F*** Face, episode 59. See you next time. Goodbye.

Was the Budweiser this episode? That was ages ago. It was. Oh my god. The way that it came in was like it was done in post. was the Budweiser this episode that was oh my god the way the way that it came in it was like it was done in post how many episodes in a row have we done this stupid soda thing now uh

we didn't do any last week but we've done three now did we not do any last week Jeff did one last week didn't he or was that this one no that was this one no I did we did one there was one break goodbye alright Eric we'll see you later week, didn't he? Or was that this one? No, that was this one. No, I did. Oh, no. Yeah, you're right. You're right. Goodbye. Goodbye. Bye. All right, Eric. We'll see you later.

What else do you guys want to talk about? About that window. Ha ha ha ha ha!