F**kface - Everything's Wrecked // Unifarm Sleep Spaghetti [141]

Episode Date: February 15, 2023

Geoff, Gavin, and Andrew talk about Geoff's situation, Austin freeze, Gavin's situation, Warzone, Andrew's credit card fraud, blanket football schemes, sleep situations, Unifarm sleep spaghetti, two recordings, Andrew's Gavin Lifehack, lasagna, separated food, and Andrew's tries double salted licorice. Want to contribute to bits? Email what you can do to [e-mail]. Already a FIRST Member and need your Private RSS feed for this show? Go here: http://bit.ly/FIRSTRSS. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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That's my first question. You have two internets? There's two connections. Okay. When did that... Never mind. It's fine. Well, I got like a second switch for my office,

and all that stuff was messed up. Okay. And you have two internets because you would pull down your internet if it was one? Like you would get throttled or whatever? Andrew was asking why I'm on a different internet than you if I'm at your house, and I told him I'm not trying to explain your setup. It's not two internets. It's one internet, but two

networks. Oh, two VLANs. That makes sense. Yeah. I was just saying it would be funny to have, like, multiple internets of different levels. Like, the guest bedroom had shitty the shitty internet. Well, you could do that, right? You could set up, like, a guest WiFi that has, like, limits on it it i'm just learning what the function keys are okay i don't

networks you asked me network i say like cbs that's a network i don't know what you're talking about i don't know how did you enjoy your extra long pleasantries it was uh great it was great i'd say i'd say it was good pleasantries jeff is not in the bet well no he's a great setup he just a little loud jeff has like i'm in a club can't hear you yeah they were like hey man you're a little loud uh what can we do about that and i was like we didn't do a fucking thing about it because it's not my setup and i'm i am i live in fear of inconveniencing others and gavin and meg were very very kind to let me shower to let my ragtag bunch of refugee Ramses

come over and shower at their house last night so I'm not trying to make their lives difficult in any way have we started? do we need to do a proper intro? I think Eric is the intro guy I got it this is episode 141

hosted by Jeff. Typically, I think you're the host. I was the comedy triangle, but I think you're the host. You always do the intros. I think that's the host thing. We are joined, as always, by Jeff, the host and Gavin and me. Andrew Panton had many names, but my name is Andrew Panton. Now we can begin episode 141.

Why are you in Gavin's house? Everything's wrecked. Everything is the place is falling apart man yeah what do you mean by that what happened well what does that mean austin had austin the city of austin had two cold days and because of that the city died really i don't know how else to describe it. We should say cold day. It went to minus one. It was literally just teetering under freezing.

Barely froze, but because it was also raining. Oh, it's one, two. So essentially what happened, Andrew, is we knew we were going to get some cold weather. I'll say this. We knew we were going to get some cold weather. I'll say this. I live in fear of Austin freezing because every time Austin freezes, I lose expensive plants that I have to pay to replant every year.

I spent $9,000 replacing plants that froze two years ago. Right? And I take meticulous care of my plants because every summer we're in a drought from May until November. And then we get like a two week period where it freezes twice and then everything gets frozen and dies. So I go through the process of covering everything meticulously, hammering into the ground. Takes me a full eight hour day to fully prep my yard for the cold weather. But I do this because I don't want to get bit in the ass financially. Again,

my fiance is, you always think of like who watches local news? People like my fiance, my fiance wakes up every day and watches fucking KXAN and David Yeomans and all the, and she loves local weather. She grew, I didn't,

I didn't know this at first, but she wanted to be a weather person growing up. And so she's like into weather. And so she watches the weather like a hawk i watch it like a hawk because i care about my yard right uh and because we've been through these freezes before they were like yeah it's gonna get a little cold it'll get like it may get below freezing for a few hours but it should be no big deal so nobody in austin covered their plants nobody in austin did any prep work because it didn't seem like that big a deal, right? And then it started raining, and it just didn't stop for three days.

And what happened was it got to like 30, 31 degrees. All the trees froze. There was no ice or there was no snow. It was just all ice. But because it's the third year in a row of this and our poor trees haven't had time to heal and recover because as soon as the freeze is over they go back into a drought every tree in austin fell yeah i feel like in 2021 it was it got down to like minus 18 celsius and then even just now in december there was one day where it was like minus 10

and this time because it was raining and minus one, every single tree in Austin fell down. Oh, no. My front tree, the tree in my front yard dropped seven or eight giant branches, hit my fence, ruined a ton of my planting, which is already ruined because nothing got covered. And everything was just rocked in ice. It gets worse. Everything was just rocked in ice. It gets worse. So Tuesday morning, Andrew,

I woke up at about 6.30 in the morning when I heard the transformer pop in the neighborhood, and then suddenly we lost power. So we lost power at 6.39 a.m. I know that's when I reported it to the city of Austin. I'll remember that for the rest of my fucking life. And so my whole street lost power. It was like not ideal, not the end of the world, right? Went back to bed, just figured whatever.

At about 9 a.m., I was awakened by a giant crash, ran out to see my backyard to see what it was. My neighbor's tree split and fell and ripped my power lines and my internet off my house. Snapped it all in half. It's shredded. So my backyard has like, look,

a pile of spaghetti that used to be electric wires and internet. I reported that as well. And that was Tuesday at about 9 a.m. And I have heard zero since. And so. Oh God. It's okay. Like, and I have heard zero since. Oh, God. It's okay. It's very, very dangerous. I remember G.I. Joe, right? Stay away from power lines.

Don't touch power lines. Also, eat apples, not candy bars. I'm pretty sure those are the two big things they would tell you all the time. Stay away from power lines. Eat apples. Or a banana. So I'm staying away from the fucking power lines, even though the power to my street is cut. And so I think I could fuck around with it,

but I'm not going to find out and I'm not going to be unsafe. I'm going to listen to roadblock and, and, and Hawk or whoever told me that. Yeah. Joe. Right. Uh,

I think it was, I think it was roadblock. However, at some point the city is going to fix the power to the street. And then my backyard is going to turn into the 4th of July, I assume. Uh, man.

And so I'm just like, I've just been sitting at the house waiting for the city to come fix my house. And they haven't. And they have just been talking about how they're overwhelmed and overrun. There's about 150,000 people out of power in Austin right now. The really shitty thing is, is that they've got, I think they've got like eight. Everybody in Austin is highly attuned to this. There are 87 crews out working 24 hours a day right now to repair the power lines. Unfortunately, as they're repairing them,

more trees are falling. So like they've made like 2% of progress in the last day, but they repaired something like 10 or 15% of the lines, but then more lines keep snapping. And so Gavin let me come over last night, Millie and Emily and I, and shower. And then we went home and froze for the night. And then today we said, fuck it. We're getting a hotel. So I have two questions immediately.

Any damage to the house is my first one. Yes. I believe so. The house is damaged? I believe there's some damage to my roof where one of the limbs hit and knocked some shingles loose so okay i'll have to get a new roof probably that's no big deal insurance will cover that i just don't know how much damage i don't know how easy it is going to be for the city to repair the electricity to my house and yeah you

know my fear is that they they will come in and they'll go like, oh, this is a bigger deal than we can do right now. You're, you specifically, sir, are going to be without power for a little bit longer than everybody else. But I'm also not in a unique situation. There's a ton, like you drive around any neighborhood in Austin. First off, I would say 25% of the neighborhood roads are impassable because of trees laying down. But even then you just drive through and like, you just see like, oh, there, I was, I drove Millie by her mom's house today to go like, your mom has power.

You can go stay with her, right? And I had to drive around an electric cable that was just in a street. Oh my God. None of the power, none of the stoplights worked on any of the roads I drove to get from my house to her house. It's just, it's insane. i wouldn't be surprised if austin just shed like a hundred thousand tons of lumber

yeah that's no that's no joke man because my so my point of reference for when this happened we're in a group text and i i'm assuming you texted something jeff and i did not get it on my end so the first text I got was from Eric saying fuck I'm sorry do you need anything I could drive you guys over something but I would probably die on the way I had no it was a thumbs up was the previous message from a few days ago I thought Eric

maybe accidentally texted the wrong place and then I saw a photo or two so I was just curious I didn't know the extent of the damage i was aware of the wires uh being destroyed but that's terrible what a shitty situation to be in i what i had done is i sent a video of the damage to my backyard see i got that four i got it four texts later i thought that's when it came in there were four other texts and then that showed up uh i guess my second question and this is i don't know how this necessarily work are you at all worried about the status of things like your fridge

if like the power getting ripped up could that somehow screw up the electrical system in the fridge itself no i don't think or like any appliance like a surge almost yeah like did you is this a surge situation potentially? I don't, I'm not, I'm not worried about that. And Nick and Eric are trying to make me worried about it in the chat right now. They're definitely piling on to the fear. However, what is more immediately annoying is that I just bought a brand new fridge. And one of the nice things about buying a new fridge is you go through the old fridge and you're like expired, expired, expired. Fuck it.

I'm throwing all this stuff away. We're going to start fresh new, you know, like new essentials, new ketchups, new everything. And then, uh, and now my fridge has been off for 48 hours. So this morning for fun, I did two things for fun today, just to pass the time. The first thing I did was I got up and I, I brought my trash can into the house and I threw away everything that I've, that's in my fridge and my freezer, uh,

that I just spent, you know, the hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of dollars of fresh groceries, including the fresh groceries. I went to the store Monday night to buy, to get ready, to be prepared for cold weather, just in case.

Could have just chucked it outside. I, I, I could have, I should just chucked it outside. I could have. I should have chucked it outside. Although then it would have warmed. It's like 40 degrees now. It would have warmed up today, and I would have nowhere to put it back. And I'm going to a hotel anyway.

We've been looking at this all wrong, I think. Austin was pretty warm before Jeff got his fridge. It's an expensive fridge. It could be more powerful than we know. Austin? it's an expensive fridge it could be more powerful than we know I'm just bummed that I had to throw away all my fucking brand new ice cream

that melted I had all these brand new microwave pizzas I was super excited about all I left is bananas and apples that's not bad Cosmic Crisp will hold strong Cosmic Crisp is the only thing in my fridge right now

As we Christmas and some diet Dr. Peppers, you know, this is what we're gonna blame it on when it's when it's bush in a year So that that is Jeff's experience in Austin during the storm Gavin, how has it been for you? What what have you suffered? What have you suffered? What have you lost during this time? Well, last time when the big freeze happened, I had no power for four days. I resorted to, I think I took 10 shits in pitch black darkness, wiping my ass blind. I boiled a saucepan of water to have a bottle of water.

Why do you need light to do that? Why is that a need light for? The area is pretty clear. To check the bog for wiping. Yeah, man, for wiping. I'm not a blind wiper. We've established this before. Fair enough.

I like to make sure it's all clean down there. Fair enough. I feel like you can tell. And then on day four, I really wanted a shower, but obviously there's no hot water, so I boiled the biggest saucepan I could find, full of water, poured it into the bath,

little bit of cold water in there, but it took me like 40 minutes to boil the water, and then I accidentally put way too much cold water in, so I took a bath in about four inches of lukewarm water, and that was a real down, that was a real low point on day four without power. Well, that was last time, right? What about this time?

Absolutely fine. It's like nothing's happening outside. And as you may recall from last week, I'm a stump or a couple of weeks ago. I'm a stump guy now. I'm getting rid of this stump, slowly working on it. I just got rid of probably a 40 foot completely dead tree that was in the middle of my yard. They could have been timed more perfectly.

That's incredible. That entire thing would have come down and ripped half the house down. Oh, that's amazing. I just couldn't believe it. I've really based on compared to what happened last time. I've rolled a 10 on luck. That's amazing. Yeah, I'd love to hear how Nick and Eric are doing.

Eric has a bad setup, so he doesn't want to really chime in all that much. He said before in the pleasantries. Nick, I don't know what your situation is. Way better this time. Way better. He's not in the mask. Nope. Good call.

No, not now. Is that your guess? Did you waste it? No, you said that was it. No, I think he's just stating it. I think that was a statement. I don't think. I have a giant tree out front, and I can hear it cracking,

and it's kind of over the house. So every once in a while, I'll go out there and just watch as it slowly, surely fades over the windows. I'm like, that's going to be bad. But it's melting now, so thank God for that. We didn't lose power, though. Good. I'm glad to hear that everybody else is

having such a good time uh no i'm not i'm not angry i'm being serious because when we had the really really bad storm two years ago and everybody lost power for like a week and then the last one i didn't i was fine the whole time and i felt i felt guilty so i feel like this is my uh this is my comeuppance for having such an easy time previously. It's just such a funny comparison of, I feel like you're looking out your window, just calculating the absurd cost of repairing your yard. While Gavin is inviting me to play war zone. Like those are the two different experiences of those days.

Yeah. But alternatively, if it was a normal day, I would be looking out my window wondering I'm not getting, why I'm not getting invited to Warzone while you were inviting Gavin to Warzone. No, I don't invite Gavin. Either way, it sucks for me.

Well, I just want to play Warzone all the time. It must be really annoying. No, I don't think it's annoying. Jeff, are you annoyed by all the invites that Gavin sends you to play Warzone? I've yet to receive one, but if I were to get one, I would fucking jump at the chance. I've yet to receive one, but if I were to get one, I would fucking jump at the chance.

I invited you before you played with us. I invited you again. You were busy. The next invite, you don't have power. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. What happened was

we played together one night. You guys invited me in an episode. I heard it the other day and I was like, absolutely. We played. We had the bathroom strategy.

It was hilarious. We all agreed it had the bathroom strategy. It was hilarious. We all agreed it was the funniest shit, the most fun we'd had in a long time. We talked about how we want to make video game content for F*** Face now, and how suddenly we're, now we're like wanting to make Let's Plays and fucking Call of Duty. And then we all agreed to play the next day.

You were like, are we guys going to play on Saturday? Let's play Saturday. And I was like, I am fucking down. Just let me know. And then I haven't heard anything since now well let's know when your power's back on

you guys have played Call of Duty 19 times since we played together and I have been invited to zero it I will say that last Call of Duty didn't go well Jeff you were busy that was the night you had plans yeah and then you can play with us and Nick was busy I finished last Call of Duty didn't go well for me, Jeff. You were busy. That was the night you had plans. You couldn't play with us, and Nick was busy.

I finished playing with Gavin, and as soon as we wrapped up, I got a text that said, your credit card limit has been exceeded. You might want to look into this. And that was alarming, considering I hadn't made any purchases. I hadn't used my credit card in that month.

Somebody, I had my credit card information stolen and they run up a bunch of charges. I'm going to post a photo in our chat. So I checked. I was like, well, wait, what happened? Was it pills and supplements? No. Is that your guess? Jeff, do you have a guess for what the product is?

What some of the products will be? I think it's shoes. I think people are buying like, you think shoes? Shoes. My last one was like holistic medicine and supplements. So I'm going to post this. Just read what, this isn't going to go out to the public, but just read what the product is for what the bulk of the charges are.

Are you fucking serious? I don't even know what that is. Somebody stole your credit card and bought one million pillows? They bought... It's like a thousand dollars worth of pillow charges for this company. The company is the front.

It's a website that was made 30 days ago and their phone number leads to an auto mechanic shop. The whole thing is set up. So what do you do? Is the credit, is your car, are you fucked? Are they going to get your money back? I'm kind of fucked. So yeah, like I called and I'm going through the process of having to report it.

I can't believe they contacted you about fraud because you're the pillow guy. That looks like a normal statement. They didn't. That's what I got a text, an automated text saying, hey, you're over your limit. And I was like, what? I didn't make any purchases. So then I looked at my credit card statement and I saw those and I had a genuine double take where I know I haven't bought pillows.

But I thought, did I somehow spend a thousand dollars on pillows? where I know I haven't bought pillows, but I thought, did I somehow spend $1,000 on pillows? Also, like, the worst fraud to have happen to me, because nobody's going to believe I didn't spend that on pillows. Without context. It'd be like if you got your card stolen, Gavin,

and someone bought a bunch of slow-mo cameras. Yeah, like, trying to report. It's impossible. So I had to call, and I'm in the process. They're investigating, but I thought of all the fucking things. It's pillows. That's incredible. call and I'm in the process. They're investigating. But I thought of all the fucking things. It's pillows.

That's incredible. $1,000 worth of pillows. I don't need any more pillows. I'm always up for more pillows. I think the only thing more insane than that would have been if it was waffle mix. But I think pillows are number two. That was one and two. Do you think this was just like complete and total happenstance?

Or do you think the people who stole your credit card like got access to your statement were like oh we'll do the pillow thing and nobody will ever know i think it's a complete coincidence because half the charges are to someone else and i did a little bit of research into this and it's like a weird front and i think it's just going to somebody's bank account that they've labeled as a business but i just couldn't believe it i thought of all the things i'm a big pillow i'm not that big of a pillow guy but I just couldn't believe it. I thought of all the things. I'm a big pillow. I'm not that big of a pillow guy. The total cost of pillows under my bed

far exceeds under $1,000. Do you think your total pillow spend is less than one of these pillows? One of these orders? Yeah, for sure. I think I'm under $340 for all my pillows. Across time, I got some old pillows. All the pillow orders

seem to be coming in around $340 from what I can see. Around there. Yeah. That must be a nice ass pillow or a lot of pillows. I think they were like, I went on the fake website they have and just like shitty throw pillows. So it's like buying a million awful throw pillows would be what you have. Yeah.

That was just, I was shocked. I couldn't believe that sucks. And I'm sorry to hear that. That's OK. It's going to get sorted out. I hope we'll find out. And like, I couldn't believe how long it takes for them to deal with that because I called

immediately. They're like 10 to 20 business days. So I just don't have a credit card for a month. Essentially, they probably just give themselves that buffer. It probably won't take that long. We'll see. We're probably on like day four or five. This is not I i mean i'm not even this year's i'm a blanket guy we established this is a year for big blanket for me and i i feel like i made the turn because i

said 2023 is the year i become a big blanket guy there's been some misunderstanding of what i mean by that some people think i'm into super large blankets, like literally big blankets. Some people think I want them stacked. You offered a weighted blanket at the time, Jeff. I feel like I have figured out a way to describe what I actually want, what my actual goals are of my blanket year. You know, in football, and maybe people here don't know, but there's like two primary schemes defensively in football i'll post a photo to show so there's man-to-man coverage right and that's the simple where every player gavin you can tell me if this makes sense as somebody who doesn't know football

at all if this translate there's a man-to-man defense so everyone's mocking someone else so everybody covers one guy that's their guy they. They got to protect them. They're on them. They're covering them. That's my current blanket situation. Every blanket has a role and it's just to be on top of me or my partner. It's just very clear. There's not, there's not a lot going on,

but I want to move into, go ahead. What does that got to do with every, how many blankets are covering you specifically? Right now it's two or three. So there's nothing like your diagram because every individual man is on an individual other man my point is that the the blanket has a role and it's just to be on one person that's its job it doesn't move out of that zone it's there i want to move into a zone blanket scheme which you could

see you have a blanket that covers different sections of the bed. That's what I want. When I say I'm going to be a big blanket guy, I want like eight blankets all in different areas of the bed that don't move from that area. Now, let me tell you. Let me tell you. This makes total sense,

Andrew, and I actually through no choice of my own, I live in a blanket zone uh really you're running the scheme i was gonna say defense makes no sense a blank a zone blanket scheme because my fiance i have learned is the most complicated sleeper on earth and so i have a let me explain this setup to you and then let me tell you if this helps you in some way. Okay. Because it fascinates me and kind of horrifies me. When it's time to go to bed at my house,

and my fiance likes to go to bed about nine at the latest, right? Here's the process for going to bed. First off, she has a special silk pillow because it's good for her skin, like a very special silk pillow that has to be on top of her two-pillow situation. Then she opens the covers and, oh, no, no. Yeah, she opens the covers

and she has this giant snake pillow, like body pillow, that has to be in a certain position. It's almost like a J, the way she has it laid up. And the long end of the jay separates me from her so there's no way i can get to her or touch her uh it's like a defense for her although to her she says it just is more comfortable but i think she's trying to build a like a pillow wall to keep me out uh which is fine i'm used to it then she turns on her white

noise machine she has a specific machine for white noise because she has to her white noise machine. She has a specific machine for white noise because she has to have white noise. Then she has a standup fan that blows on her feet because her feet get cold, right? I respect it. That's a move. Then she has this misting spray that she sprays on the top of her pillows

and then on the bed where she's going to lay in it because it's supposed to be calming and refreshing or something, right? So she does that. She does a lot of complicated makeup stuff too, but I consider that a part of a different situation, although sometimes it happens in bed. You know in Minecraft when you cross into a different biome?

Yeah. I'm just imagining that right down the middle of your bed. Essentially, right? Essentially. And so then we've got the white noise machine. We've got the special spray that she mists on her pillow every night and her bed. We've got the giant Jay snake pillow, right?

We've got the fan blowing specifically on her feet in case they get cold. Then she crawls into the bed in full jammies, by the way. And she lays, she gets into the J pillow to where it's almost,

it's almost like a baby bop where like her arms are up and she's like, she can't move. She's like, she's essentially a toddler, right? And then she puts a top sheet over her and then a duvet and then a second duvet that

I have nothing to do with. This is where we get into the zone because that's too much blanket for me, right? Then on top of the second duvet, we have a gray blanket that's like a throw. Now, I do participate in the gray blanket because that helps. I just like a little bit of weight on my feet, right? Then she has this furry white blanket that she puts on top of the gray blanket. Then she puts the weighted blanket on. All that's just on her side. I just have the one, the top sheet, the one duvet and the gray throw. All that other pile of stuff is hers.

And then with just her face sticking out, you can't even see the rest of her. She moves around for a little bit like a worm and then has her clothes in her hands. Like she takes her clothes off her jammies, but not until she's already in her cocoon. Like and then she like wiggles out. I don't know why. I don't know why. I don't I don't know why, because I will never understand why she doesn't just take them off before she gets in the bed. Then she does all that.

And then then she puts a sleep mask them off before she gets in the bed. Then she does all that. And then, then she puts a sleep mask on and then she goes to sleep. It's like, all I've learned is that if there's a fire minute, neither of you are getting out. I'm fine. But she won't be, she won't be out of bed by the time I'm in the car down the street.

It is the most complicated sleeping process I have ever seen in my entire life i wrote it down let me see i'm gonna make sure i got covered everything special pajamas yeah she has special pajamas sprays the pillow a range of special pillows turns on a fan keeps the white noise machine burrows into her her boppy top sheet duvet second sheet weighted blanket knitted blanket sham she means i have eye mask touch oh yeah yeah that then the last part is she wants she can't fall asleep unless i touch her back so i'll have to like snake my arm i have to like it's complicated i have to like snake my arm through all these pillows and blankets and stuff and then i just put i just physically put my my like sometimes just the tips of my fingers because it's a king-size bed so i can't even reach her just on her back and i have to she she requests

she i don't have to i don't have to do anything she's not a ty anything. She's not a tyrant, but she's like, it helps me sleep. So then if I just put my hand on her back, then she'll fall asleep. And then I can get up and go play video games or watch TV in bed or whatever. And she's out, but it takes her about 90 seconds to fall asleep. Do you have to carefully retract your arm back through the maze? Well, like when I was trying to put Millie to sleep when she was a kid and like sneak out of the room before she woke up. Yeah.

Sometimes I have a diagram of my sleeping situation let's see it really my blanket situation specifically let's see it oh you're man to man you're running a man-to-man scheme and now this diagram is actually what's happening where meg has a duvet and i have my own duvet and that's it it's man-to-man you just have your own setups i got awesome that's awesome same bed Separate blankets And we just I'm We're constantly just like Tugging on it

Cause There's cats in the bed They're usually in the middle So we're both on the dregs Of the duvet If we share it So I'm like tugging it over me And it like

Strangles her on the other side So we've Separated our duvet situation And uh It's been a winner for us Now have you ever tried Having a few blankets On the bed Like in a variety of places That Now, have you ever tried having a few blankets on the bed,

like in a variety of places that you could stumble into? So like keep all the blankets locked in place and then you just relocate around the bed, depending on how you're feeling? Well, sort of like this was sort of discovered because I had three blankets and I moved my arm and I accidentally went to a different blanket. And I was like, this is kind of nice.

This is an unusual thing. Like I want the experience to move my foot and be met with unexpected fleece is what i want like i think that's really nice just wherever you go layers yeah i wouldn't it doesn't even have to necessarily be just like i want to feel a different thing i wasn't expecting i want to be like i'm gonna adjust oh oh what's that there that's a nice blanket right there that's cozy that's what i want I want. That's my goal. I feel like you should try that. I respect your system, but you should innovate a little bit. So does the zone system,

is it just covering different parts of your body or is your entire body moving in and out of zones? My bed, or I'm moving in and out of zones all the time. I'm moving. So how many zone changes per night? I'm a mobile sleeper. Do you go to all zones every night? Not all zones. I'm not doing a full spin like a fucking clock, but I'm a mobile sleeper. Per night. Do you go to all zones every night? Not all zones.

I'm not doing a full spin like a fucking clock. I'm getting around. I'm getting the bottom right, maybe part of the bottom left. I'm in the middle. I'm at the top. I'm moving all around. Not a full rotation. Because of this description of your sleeping,

I know what your bed looks like, but now I'm imagining it's like 10 meters wide. There's no way what you're saying makes any sense with these zones. I'll track it. We'll like 10 meters wide. There's no way what you're saying. But he said to me zones. I'll track it. We'll set up zones in my bed. I'll put markers down and I'll tell you how many zones I enter in one night. It's going to be a few. I'm going to be in a few zones.

I want like a heat map. Yeah. Like those Halo 2 kill like the heat kill maps. Yeah. You'll see. We'll figure out where I'm at. So now you're going to a hotel,ff how does that change her routine does she bring the fan with her like what is it disrupted will she just not sleep well like what is that process so you know we from time to time

stay in hotels uh she will bring her iphone and she has a white noise or I think it's brown noise she likes. I can't remember. But a specific app that she pays for that will do the white noise. She will request 300 blankets from the front desk. Like the second we get into the room, she'll call the front desk.

She goes straight to the closets and she looks for the extra blankets. And if there's none, she's not happy. If there's like one or two, she'll grab them, and she will still call down the front desk and say, can you bring up some extra blankets? And then she'll just make do. She'll still have the sleep mask. I don't think she'll have the spray, the gentle spray that she puts on the pillow that's supposed to calm her.

Because I packed for her today because she had to go to work. So I didn't, I don't know what that is. And I didn't pack it. It's also pitch black in my bedroom. But she'll make do. She'll make do. It won't be the same. It'll be a modified version. She won't have her big J pillow.

But anyway, I actually, it's actually, it's fun that you brought this up. Because sleep is something that I've been thinking about getting into with Uniform. I've had a lot of ideas. I've actually got a lot of notes written down for potential sleep uh products that i think uniform could get into get into i don't i'm not i'll be honest i'm not prepared yeah to go into it today i didn't think we were going down this road it was like a future note um i may i may have been prepared if fucking austin hadn't died on tuesday but uh can I just ask, is there anything edible with these pills?

Oh, it's all, like some ham? No, it's not edible. Oh, it's all edible? It's not edible, but what it is, but it's all named after food. I'm gonna,

like, I'll just throw some stuff out there. What if I told you, you would sleep, you would have the best night of sleep in your life if you slept in uniform, by the way,

uniform, combining the power of one with the fabric of the form, uniform, uniform sleep spaghetti. Ooh, uniform, combining the power of one with the fabric of the form, uniform, uniform sleep spaghetti. Ooh, okay. You don't even know what sleep spaghetti is, but when I invent it, it's gonna rock your world.

I feel like it's a bunch of like pool noodles, but for the bedroom. That's in my head what it would be like. You're very close to what I'm going to invent, but it'll be even better in person. Yeah. I've been studying emily and i'm gonna i'm gonna improve upon sleep i've also got a thing called i'm working on called a sleep pillow uh sleep called a sleep pickle i think a sleep could be huge sleep spaghetti i i

got tons of tons of ideas but nothing's like really hammered out yet if you had to convert any food into a pillow what do you think the ideal food to pillow would be spaghetti fried egg fried egg uh it's yeah i guess like because it's like it goes out right like you got some room to work with there i was thinking watermelon putting my head in a watermelon to sleep i feel like it'd be great like inside yeah like inside because it'd be all dark and then it's comfy it's got that support it's kind of squishy I feel like that can be relaxed. Like a frozen watermelon, I think it'd be pretty good. Allow me to sway your opinion on spaghetti. Sleep spaghetti. Let me just say this.

When you think of a meatball, where does that meatball live? It lives on top of a pile of spaghetti. I'll cover it in cheese. I'll cover it in cheese. I still haven't had one of those. Have you ever seen a piece of food that looks more comfortable and more cozy in its environment than the meatball?

The meatball is so nestled in springy, wonderful spaghetti. It envelops it. It's warm. It's essentially like a Temur-pedic bed you could put like you could put like a bottle a glass of wine at one end of spaghetti and a meatball at the other and you could jump up and down in the middle and it wouldn't it wouldn't tip over like sleep spaghetti is the way to go you can't name me a fruit that's more or a fruit a food that's more comfortable in its environment than a meatball nestled in spaghetti. That's tough. I'll give you 10 bucks if you can balance a wine glass on spaghetti.

I'm all about trying to do it, but it's going to be a little bit for me. I'm going to need a kitchen. So just to set some ground rules for that. Can he apply the spaghetti the way he wants to? Or do you mean like he orders spaghetti from a restaurant and then has to attempt to balance? like he orders spaghetti from a restaurant and then has to attempt to balance it has to be from a restaurant okay i think that might be tough he has to do it in the restaurant but to be fair with i don't think that's a counter to jeff's idea

because it's not like you're gonna have people come in to apply your bed spaghetti for your bed like you get to do it the way you want to do it. You can set it up in a way that would be most effective for what your goals are. I think it would be tough though. Just imagine nestling yourself into a bunch of

really cozy, long, thin, spaghetti-like pillows that you just like, that just envelop around you. It doesn't sound bad. You're the meatball. Just imagine

you're the little human meatball poking your head out and you just have a thousand soft uh like cotton fingers caressing you those are that's the sleep spaghetti are these weighted spaghetti noodles they could be they could be they absolutely could be see if you get weighted spaghetti noodles you're never leaving bed in the house fire you're just dead that's your death you're gonna have a lot of dreams about being choked what was the guy at a christmas carol with all the fucking chains on him that would be you trying to get up every morning like you're just like being held down like old man yeah marley yeah that would be you i think i just had a thought hot dog i think is a

pretty cozy food that nestles in it's got the bun i'm not gonna bun it's in the middle of it yeah that's pretty cozy that's that's true comfy it's up there pretty cozy i agree with that i would i think the least comfy food fish and chips is what came to mind that just seems uncomfortable i don't think anyone involved is happy or comfortable in the fish and chips in the box set up just everything's crammed you uh you mentioned something that actually had a question about andrew you mentioned a hot dog and that reminded me the other day, and I remember this because I just threw them away today because they were ruined,

because they were in my freezer. Emily bought pretzel dogs, and they're like corn dogs, but with pretzel. Yes. They're great. If I were to eat a pretzel dog, would that count as a corn dog? No, I don't think so. It eat a pretzel dog would that count as a corn dog no i don't think so it's a pretzel dog see i agree but i was scared that if i ate one before i talked to you guys because they

looked pretty good she was making them uh or she's gonna make them they look pretty good that i would find out that i had inadvertently eaten uh what be considered a corn dog, and you guys would nail me to the wall for it. Absolutely. Okay, okay. Well, I haven't eaten a pretzel dog. You enjoy pretzel dogs. But if you say it's safe to eat a pretzel dog, and it doesn't count as a corn dog, then I might try a pretzel dog.

It's absolutely safe. Speaking of eating, I still have salted licorice. Did we cover that? I don't think we went over that. Are you going to go for it? What happened last week? I think I'll do it at the end. Yeah, I'll do it at the end.

So last week we recorded and everybody by everybody, I guess I just mean Eric and I, we stated, but we're all part of the conversation that the following week we would record two episodes. And so as prep for that, I found a bag of double salted licorice. Like I found a custom, a specialty store that had it. I bought a giant bags worth of it. I bought a giant bag's worth of it. I was all excited. So we recorded all of the episode

last week or the one that you would have heard previously. And then I thought, great. It was kind of at the end of the episode. I don't want to add the licorice segment now. I'll save it for the second one. We're doing two.

We wrap up and Jeff and Gavin have no fucking. They've deleted from their brain that we're supposed to do, too. And then it turns into this whole... We recorded part of it, I think. I know Nick is considering releasing it in some aspect. I don't know if it's worth putting out.

I guess you'll find out at some point if it's available. It's just a very angry Eric. Well, it wasn't that we forgot. It's just that we'd gone back and forth. No, you forgot. No, you forgot. You 100% just that we'd gone back and forth. No, you forgot. No, you forgot. You 100% forgot. It was zero back and forth.

You didn't remember. You forgot. Jeff, did you forget or did you think we were doing one and we talked about it? I thought we were doing one and that we had discussed two but had never come to an agreement. No, it was we locked in two 100% and then you two were just like, what, we're doing two? What? Well, if we're doing to what? Well, if I'm confused,

something's clearly don't happen. Well, what is happening? And then it turned into you critiquing how Eric does the invites in the calendar. God damn it. Damn it. I was just about to say, let's let Nick answer it.

He's impartial. I don't trust Eric. And he fucking wrote that we did lock it in. Yeah. Damn it. All right. Ty, right? Absolutely.

Jacob, Molly, Jacob Marley. Jacob Bob Marley. I said Bob Marley. You said Bob Marley. That's right. It's a Marley. Moron. Let me check. So I've had this. I've had this salted liquor. Are you worried about that, Jeff?

Actually, that's a great question. Am I worried about the ghost of Christmas past? No, I'm worried about the, Jeff? Actually, that's a great question. Am I worried about the ghost of Christmas past? No, you're worried about the oxygen levels. Yeah, the carbon dioxide, because Gavin is a fucking idiot in his room. Well, Jeff's in Meg's office, and I think it's much better ventilated. I feel fine. Although she did have to say

when Jeff sat down, hit start record, don't hit start stream. I just love the idea of Meg going live, and it's just Jeff's audio of a face recording being streamed live. It's just me touching stuff on her desk. People wanting Meg and listening to Jeff talk about bed spaghetti with no context.

With no other side of the conversation. How much fun is it to say, also, sleep spaghetti? It rolls off the tongue. It does, but it also kind of makes me uncomfortable. Because when I think of noodles, I think of kind of cold, kind of wet. No, what it's going to do is it's going to make

you more comfortable than you've ever been in your entire life. That's the thing. I think you're going to end up with so much sleep spaghetti stuffed down the back of the headboard. It's going to be all over the floor. That's the thing. I think you're going to end up with so much sleep spaghetti stuffed down the back of the headboard. It's going to be all over the floor. It's going to be a tidy up every morning, I think.

We'll see. I mean, everybody makes their bed every day. Do you think you'll lose noodles like you do socks? No. Like it's just a fuck. Like I'm slowly losing all my sleep spaghetti. My sleep spaghetti noodles in my head,

they're like four to seven feet long. They're not going anywhere. Seven feet? Okay. I'm so much more on board for this. If I could get seven foot sleep noodles that are weighted. You're going to be wrapped around your neck every night. You'll like nestle it in.

It's a pillow. You can find a pillow. You'll be fine. It's like a ball pit almost in my head. I feel like you should have for the sleep spaghetti. Oh, sleep meatballs. Maybe we're on the wrong side of this. Maybe it's the balls that are comfortable. No, but the ball,

it's like a ton of sleep balls. That sounds way more comfortable than spaghetti. Sleep balls could be good too. You can't have one without the other. They're perfect together. Oh, like a combo deal? I think you can do sleep balls for the pillow. Yeah, I think that could work. You'd need

walls for the bed that looks like a kids playpen I don't have a clock in front of me at this setup we're 44 minutes in yes we're close to an hour bottom right of the screen on every screen yeah I don't know what time

alright that's a fair point I didn't know when we started you're not at different times though you're good you're right i'm i'm dumb you're absolutely so i have i have a gavin life hack i have a life hack and i don't think i don't think this is a life hack but i think it's a gavin life hack and i want you to like review i want you to tell me if you would consider this a life hack okay are you ready yeah I'm ready to write this down. Frozen meals that offer a microwavable option and a cook in oven option. Always go with the microwave option.

It's, it's quicker and it tastes just as good. Interesting. Oh, there's no cons. I couldn't disagree with you more. Really? Always.

Based on what? Always go with the oven option. When was the last time you tried it? I do it all the time. You'll get it faster, but it'll be cooked unevenly. It won't be crisp. You won't have, like, the cheese won't be all melted and crisped up.

I disagree. Like, you would rather have a pizza from the microwave than from the oven? No. First of all, you don't have fucking microwave instructions on a pizza that doesn't come on a frozen pizza i've never seen a frozen pizza like a proper pizza yeah i've not done a pizza but i feel like the the reason i'm in the freezer rooting around for old frozen meals is that you know it's gotten late i want something quick and i don't want to preheat the oven for 20 minutes and cook something for 40 so to clarify i'm i was on your side, Jeff, until today. I had a frozen dinner for lunch and I typically put it in the oven because I think I want that cook. I feel like if they give the

instructions for it, it'll be a better experience. Didn't have the time for it. Did it in the microwave for the first time. I think some of it turned out even better in a microwave, like the instant mashed potatoes, way better in a microwave than it turns out in the oven. I think this is a way, I feel like I've wasted hours of my life, across my life, waiting for ovens to cook a meal I could just have in the microwave.

I think food from the microwave is perfectly acceptable, but I think it's always better from the oven. It may not be good enough to be worth the time, if in your busy schedule, but it's going to taste better cooked properly in an oven than it will in a microwave i think if you have a mid-microwave stir it's always better results and it equals that of an oven it's not as good but it's like nine out of ten of the way there there's a lot of like like frozen lasagnas and shit that i eat that'll have an option that's like conventional

oven microwave or like modified version where you like cook it in the microwave for like 15 minutes and then finish it off in the oven i think that probably gets you pretty similar uh to a full oven cook i don't know yeah i don't i'm spaghetti or, like, lasagna guy for that type of thing. I'm talking mainly like... You, you, you, you aren't a lasagna guy? I don't like lasagna. I'm not a fan of it, no. The Garfield guy? I know, I know.

I should. I respect his views on it. I share equal opinions about Mondays. I feel like that bridges the gap, but I'm not a big lasagna guy. Have you just had bad... Ah, that's interesting. I wonder why, what don't you like about it? I don't know It's like I haven't had it in a long time. I just I didn't the sauce wasn't great texturally I didn't think it was all that appealing. Here's the thing about lasagna, right? It's never what you're after

You're never craving it, but it's always fine. That's my opinion on it I have a I'm gonna have mac and cheese for dinner tonight i'm gonna put that together i have i have a mix i want to hear your guys reaction to it because this is just something i do occasionally it's not something i always do but something i do occasionally and i think it's perfectly acceptable but most people i've said this do you think it's insane they haven't done it they think it's gross a little bit of ketchup and the mac and cheese once you reheat it reheat it put some ketchup in you stir in the ketchup it's i think it's pretty good gross and did you drop that ketchup from the fridge i do typically interesting yeah i don't get ketchup and mac and cheese that's the worst

is that a thing you've heard of though at least like the last okay yeah fine okay good i just felt weird because i thought that was kind of a common thing but the last few people I've told, they were like, I've never fucking, who would do that? It's insane. You know,

I gotta say, Andrew, I think that if I were going to draft a list of the most universally loved, like, safest foods, like, where you'd like, put it on a table

and 99 out of 100 people are gonna go like, oh yeah, I'll eat it. I would put lasagna really high up there. Really? Maybe I need to revisit it. I would put lasagna really high up there. Really? Maybe I need to revisit it. I would think lasagna is like a really safe food

that like everybody's like, oh, everybody likes lasagna. I just don't know who's like, I sometimes see it on the menu at a restaurant. Who's ordering that at a restaurant? That's what I want to know. I would order lasagna at a restaurant. Over everything else on the menu,

you'd go for that? I mean, I would probably prefer ravioli. Right, you'd go for something else. But lasagna would be like my second, I think. Have you actually ordered that at a restaurant? Yeah, tons of times. Oh, wow. Look, Eric says he'd get it too.

Nick would not. Why not, Nick? I feel like you can split out the food on like spaghetti and meatballs further apart and everything is just so condensed into a lasagna. It's just so tight. Pretty dense. Yeah. I want to eat more. Do they do lasagnas with layers of different things per layer?

You know, like the raid. It's like different floor. Like, is there like a lasagna where it's sauce and then there's like potato like there's some potato or something like is there different that's the best movie to food comparison i've ever heard well i'm just thinking of like different floors different things happen that's the ring just thinking of tiny bits of meat like running up the legs i uh i can't believe we're going to completely and totally gloss over the fact that Nick needs to separate his food out like a fucking weirdo. Wait. No, that didn't strike me as weird.

You don't see what's going on in the chat. Nick likes to enjoy things one at a time. Lasagna has everything in one bite. He likes to be able to separate the ingredients out. I need every single bite to have everything that's on my plate in every single bite. I want the full flavor every single time. Even if I'm eating meat and

veg and mashed potato, as soon as I run out of one thing, the bites get subpar. Like if I'm left with just two things, then I'm down to the one. I will eat, so if I have an apple pie, I'm eating all the filling first. You're a maniac. What? I love the eating all the filling first. You're a maniac. What?

I love the, I separate the two. You're a maniac. Because I enjoy them both, but in different ways. Didn't you watch Ratatouille? The beauty is when the ingredients are combined together in your mouth. What's the point of making it into a pie then?

Just eat apple. You just eat the ingredients of a pie. Yeah, just eat the bowls of ingredients. I'm stunned right now. I'm just trying to think about how many men above the age of 40 have. Yeah, just eat the bowls of ingredients. I'm stunned right now. I'm just trying to think about how many men above the age of 40 have seriously said, have you seen Ratatouille? And then extended with

the meaning of the film. That's great. You enjoyed how you want to. I just have certain ways I eat certain foods. That's one of them. Always eat the inside first, then I eat the crust. I just think it's weird that Nick can't eat spaghetti and a meatball at the same time. He can only have one or the other.

So what do you do? Do you dip the spaghetti in the sauce separately? Do you drink the sauce after? Why would you have it all separate? No, I just do the little twist with the spaghetti, eat the spaghetti, cut up a piece of meatball, eat a piece of meatball, then back and forth, back and forth. Or, you know, go a couple pieces of spaghetti and then back to meatball or whatever. It doesn't have to be together.

You would never put spaghetti, you would never roll up some spaghetti noodle and then spear a meatball at the end of it and then put that both in your mouth at the same time? Well, accidents happen. So you must hate burritos and like omelets and stuff where it's all churned up. No, but that's what I ordered. Nick and I are on the same page here. You're expecting that. That's how that food is delivered.

Well, maybe you would love lasagna then because you get to eat down layer by layer. It's like a back and forth of different tastes. It's like the ultimate pillow fort in your bed. You go from cheese duvet to pasta duvet to weighted

meat blanket. You're fucking it is, it's what you're trying to build. I feel like I just learned that Nick and I both speak a language that we didn't know we shared. I feel a deep connection with Nick in this moment. It just makes sense. What are you saying makes sense? I agree.

Now if there was like the meatball was like shredded and put amongst the spaghetti, you're not separating that. That's too much work. That's together. But if they are two separate items, you can enjoy them individually. You don't need to mix them.

Are you there with like a bowl of dry cereal and a glass of milk? First of all, I always have my cereal dry. That's just the first thing. I'm not a milk guy because I was allergic to milk as a kid. That's understandable. I've never had cereal with milk. I don't know what that's like.

What is it you're allergic to in milk? I used to have gastrointestinal issues. Oh, yeah. Get lactose free milk or almond milk. That doesn't sound good. I don't like that. I eat lactose free milk gave me cereal back. We've talked about this.

I eat cereal every day of my life now. Thanks to lactose free milk. It's it's worth it. Andrew, you're you're missing out on a whole world. Maybe a whole world. lactose free milk. It's worth it Andrew. You're missing out on a whole world. Maybe. A whole world. I'll try it. I'll try it. I'll add it to the lasagna list. I don't appreciate Gavin. You're trying to put me in the fucking

psychopath tier of the girl from Get Out that like dips the cereal one thing at a time. That's not. You don't do that. That's psycho. I'm just trying to see what you draw the line well those first i would consider milk more of a beverage than a topping i don't think anyone could consider a topping well what is it in a cereal you're pouring a drink over your food yeah it's not on the top

it's a bottom a middle and a top it an egg. It's the lasagna of cereal. And yeah, I guess it's all surrounding, right? It's soup. It's like a chicken soup. Cereal is cold breakfast soup. OK. Yeah, I don't know. It doesn't sound appealing.

Huh? Should I try the licorice? Should I? What? How many? First of all, do I need to finish it? Is that what has been? Has anyone finished a single piece of the licorice? I have not.

Oh, Meg did. She had a whole one and she got it all down. Really? Okay. So that's the challenge. Just finishing. This is so fucking stale. This is so dry.

I don't know if it's always this dry. Does it go stale? I don't know. I assumed it would be unimpacted due to the salt of the double salted. It's a pretty hard substance. Maybe it's not. Pretty tough substance. It looks like a hockey puck.

It's just black. I'm going to try this. This might be the final part of my best of face compilation. Should I bite into this or should I let it linger for a minute? Just do whatever feels right to you oh my fucking god bull

I was not expecting that yeah it catches you off guard we're riding it out we're riding it out like a mechanical bull right around my mouth I can't even fucking chew this.

It's like shut my mouth down. It's like getting blitzed or something like when it hits the tongue. Yeah, are you experiencing where it's like the bit of your tongue that it's on, it just doesn't want to be there and you end up just sliding all over the place?

It's like burning almost. It feels almost like you're burning it. This is terrible. Yeah. This is worse than chocolate. It's a real shock to the system. Oh no! Oh no!

I swallowed liquid. It was just salt water. It was salt. By the way, what you just swallowed, that's how fucking salty the ocean is in Cancun right now. Extra salty. Extra salty.

It's it. The ocean in Cancun right now is double salted liquorish salty. Oh, God. Oh, God. It's been so long since we had one of those. You ludicrous. That was so violent. That was another velociraptor. I don't even like normal licorice.

This is terrible. Oh, my god. Oh my god. I can't swallow it. It's definitely challenging to swallow. Oh my god. How long did it take Meg to eat this? Oh, I think she was done with it within like a minute.

She was like, yeah, that sucked, but it wasn't that bad. Oh my god! She's pretty hardcore, though. She's pretty brave. Ugh. Oh my god. In most cases, if someone said, this person ate licorice, they're pretty brave. I'd laugh. That's a genuine...

You've earned that. Oh my god. That's by far the worst thing we've ever had on a show. By a lot. Oh my god. That's by far the worst thing we've ever had on a show. By a lot. I'm done. I can't believe that's worse. Yeah, I think it is, actually. I don't think the reaction to anything else has been that quick. It's the second it touches your tongue.

It's the instant. I don't know. The dark chocolate is just mud. It's unpleasant. That feels like it's worse. It attacks you in different ways i still feel like there's somebody just pouring salt on my tongue right now and it's gone nick likes uh weird shit nick did did you try one i haven't had one yet so okay because you you tend to like the weirdest stuff and you you seemed okay with branston pickle as well so i

wonder how you'd feel about this yeah i'll bring you some for the next office day. I'm not a huge licorice guy to begin with, so this could go bad. This isn't licorice. Don't worry about it. Yeah, this is something totally off. Now, you're not going to be able to separate the salt from the licorice.

I hope that's not a problem. It's kind of a package deal. We'll see how it goes. Has anyone tried multiples in their mouth at once? No. Are you going to go for like five? Let's go for a handful.

Let's see what happens. A handful? Don't swallow a handful. I'm not going to swallow. I just don't know why I'm going to be able to chew a handful. How many do I have in my hand? I just grabbed a handful.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen. Like 20. I got like 20 in my hand. I don't even know if I can fit this many in my mouth. That's enough licorice to kill a 40-year-old.

Yeah. Yeah? If I ate that much licorice, I would die instantly. I'm scared to even just put it in my mouth. I'm going to put one down. 19. As long as you don't swallow. Here we go.

Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Don't do that. Don't do that. You can't move it. You can't move it at all.

Every time you move one and you win the skills in your tongue. Don't move it. You can't move it at all. Every time you move one and you win the skills on your tongue, don't do that. Eric said he sounds like Star Wars. Or like when the guy dies in the pod race. Like that. That sort of... Oh my god.

Oh man. I feel like... I didn't get to anything on my list. Yeah. I guess on that note, we should probably end it. I didn't get to the main thing on my list, which Gavin and I discussed talking about right before the episode,

which we are going... You got a one-week reprieve, Gavin, before we have to figure this out. We need... It has become alarmingly clear that you and I need a friend-tervention. I don't know what that is, but we need it. Because our friendship has gotten

bizarre and weird and awkward, and the last two days has been odd. I mean, is you going to leave it at that, or are you going to explain some of that? Well, what should we explain? You let me come over

to take a shower at your house and it was just very weird and I appreciated it but I realized I don't know anything about your life. I don't know. I was looking at your house.

I was in your house that I've never been in and I was thinking about how you're my best friend in the world and I don't know anything about you. Oh my God. Is it because I just

took you to the shower and let you get on with it? I figured you were tired and you wanted to shower. No, I don't know. It was just like, it was just we'll talk about it next week, but I you and I, our friendship has gotten so awkward. I don't know what to do. We used to live together. I spent 24 hours a day with you. How did

we get so weird around each other? I think it's just because we're audio only now. We're an audio only friendship. I guess so. An audio only friendship. Do you think him learning you threw the stick at him when he was suntanning or whatever? Do you think that maybe hindered? It's been from that point.

All right. Well, we'll do a friend tovention. I think it's pretty. I think it's been proven that Gavin from the future actually threw the stick, not me. So I'm clear of that. You're right. You're right. All right.

Well, there you go. Thank you for listening to another episode of the F*** Face podcast. Boy, if you like listening to Andrew gargle salt, boy, would we love it if you would tell a friend about it. Say, hey, you ever hear a guy eat licorice? Boy, you haven't lived. I got a friend about it. Say, hey, you ever hear a guy eat licorice? Boy, you haven't lived. I got a podcast for you. It's just about dudes eating licorice and drinking sodas and burping

and somehow it's still wildly entertaining. Yeah, so give us a star. Maybe a variety of them. Maybe multiple. Oh, yeah. You don't have to stop at one. Yeah, I mean, you could do a few if you feel like it. Give us as many as you like. Whatever makes you happy. Max stars for feel like it. Do this as many as you want. Do whatever makes you happy.

Max stars for F*** Face. See you next week. Hey, guys. Major League Fan Jack here with a look at next week's episode of F*** Face. It's the fridge fridge magnets. Gavin accidentally planted a tree. When does it become stealing? Let's hear some more life hacks.

Jeff has looked better. And once again, Andrew does not eat the pencil. All that and more on next week's episode of F*** Face.