F**kface - Geoff's Latest Oral Surgery // The First Do Box Story [127]

Episode Date: November 9, 2022

Geoff, Gavin, and Andrew talk about Geoff's inflatable face and dead people's gums, mouth torture, Geoff's sort of better broken body, Andrew's Icy Hot experience, a Do Box story, and Andrew's gift. Want to contribute to bits? Email what you can do to [e-mail]. Sponsored by Express VPN http://expressvpn.com/face , Hello Fresh http://hellofresh.com/face65 and use code face65, and DraftKings Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app NOW, use promo code REGULATION, throw down FIVE DOLLARS on UFC 281, and get TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS IN FREE BETS if your fighter wins. If you or someone you know has a gambling problem, crisis counseling and referral services can be accessed by calling 1-800-GAMBLER (1-800-426-2537) (IL/IN/LA/MI/NJ/PA/TN/WV/WY), 1-800-NEXT STEP (AZ), 1-800-522-4700 (CO/NH/KS), 888-789-7777/visit http://ccpg.org (CT), 1-800-BETS OFF (IA), 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY), visit OPGR.org (OR), or 1-888-532-3500 (VA). 21+ (18+ NH/WY). Physically present in AZ/CO/CT/IL/IN/IA/LA(select parishes)/MI/NH/NJ/ NY/OR/PA/TN/VA/WV/WY only. $200 in Free bets: New customers only. Min. $5 deposit. Min $5 pre-fight moneyline bet. $200 issued as eight (8) $25 free bets. Bet must win. Stepped Up: 1 Token issued per eligible game. Opt in req. Min $1 bet. Max bet limits apply. Min. 3-leg. Each leg min. -300 odds, total bet +100 odds or longer. 10+ leg req. for 100% boost. Ends at the start of the main card fight of UFC 281. See eligibility & terms at sportsbook.draftkings.com/mmaterms. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Not recording. I wasn't expecting. Why? Oh, I just added a second track. Fuck. Wait a second. Stop. Eric? Oh, I just added a second track. Fuck. Wait a second. Stop. Eric said action and I went.

And you double actioned. Why is it giving me two tracks all of a sudden? Every time I hit record. Christ. This sucks. I know. This sucks. There we go.

Okay, I'm back. I'm back. Hello and welcome to another episode of the F*** Face Podcast. This is the intro. It's brutal. This is episode 127. My name is Jeff Ramsey. With me as always, the other ones, Andrew and Gavin. Hello.

With me, as always, the other ones, Andrew and Gavin. Hello. First off, let me just start off this podcast this week by taking full responsibility for missing the pizza lunch and any... I don't even remember if we were supposed to record a monkey movie or not. I tried to sneak in... I didn't tell you guys about it in advance. I realized I didn't really think about it. I had what I thought was going to be a very minor little oral surgery.

And I was not prepared for the equivalent of 20 root canals in my mouth at once that it turned out to be. Jesus Christ. I could not believe when you text a picture i i and i can't believe you didn't walk away i thought that was what was going to happen well well the podcast isn't over yet today uh wait there's a photo yeah i'm gonna i'll put it up in this in the discord right now this is a photo i sent gavin uh right after the surgery it's just me in bed oh my god yeah that's not good it got it got it got way worse um it started to swell what what it is a

photo of me in bed and the entire right side of my face looks like a balloon you yeah but more more near the mouth like it looks like i've got like a bunch of golf balls in one side of my mouth it looks like your face is a bounce house that is starting to inflate. Like just the left side, like when it starts going up, I'm like a Halloween inflatable, uh, in somebody's front yard.

That's 35% of the way inflated. Uh, it got, it ended up getting way worse, the way more painful, uh, later on. Uh,

but that laid me up for a lot longer than I anticipated. And so if you'll indulge, I'll just run through that story real fast. I'd love to hear it. So first off, who the fuck schedules dentist shit on Saturdays? My periodontist is Machiavellian. I'll say that.

This dude, he only does surgeries in Austin on Saturdays. I guess he does like Round Rock and Cedar Park or Kyle, you know, surrounding areas the rest of the week. But he only makes time in Austin on fucking Saturdays. So, in June, I don't even think I mentioned this to you guys then.

In June, I went on a Saturday and I went and had a consultation with him you guys have I don't know if I've mentioned this to you guys before but you know in addition to all the mouth stuff I have I have gum problems my orthodontist and my periodontist both told me that

white people have shitty gums on average and so I'm just working with bad genetics here. Um, so with all the, all the Invisalign and moving stuff around, uh, and all the surgeries I'd had, uh, my gums had started to recede. Um, and it was something I was pretty worried about. And I'd been talking about with my dentist a lot and she kept kind of pushing it off. And eventually, uh, eventually I went to the periodontist and he was like, holy shit, your gums are bad, dude. You need to get this fixed pretty fast.

Otherwise, you're going to get bone density loss, and then that's bone grafting. It gets way worse. Jeez. Oh, my God. The problem escalates, right? So the procedure to get a gum graft, and it's going to sound rough, but I'll explain why I didn't tell you guys about it. The procedure to get a gum graft is one of two things.

Either they remove skin from the roof of your mouth, and then they sew it around your teeth and your existing gums to kind of bolster it, kind of beef it up. Give you some beefy gums, right? God. some beefy gums right god uh however my gum loss was so severe that when i saw the guy in june he was like listen you're actually you're he was essentially like your mouth is so fucked up uh that you're gonna come out of this better you there's no there's not enough you don't have enough gums in your head to fix this so we're gonna use a commercial solution so basically if you use if we use your gums from the roof of your mouth, that's like a two-week recovery, which, by the way, is bullshit.

It is not a two-week recovery. And by the way, if I sound weird at all, it is still hard to talk, and my mouth still hurts, and it is hard to smile, and it hurts to laugh. So luckily, I'm doing the podcast with you guys, so that shouldn't be a problem. No laughing here. He goes, you need too much gums. So we're not going to be able to use you. Every time you consult with a doctor or a surgeon,

they always lay out like, well, here's what people do. And then they're like, no, no, no, no, no. Definitely not for you. What are you going to have to do for you? You're reminding me of when I had my thumb surgery after i shared my phone yeah yeah uh doctor was like oh no oh no no uh anyway so he's like you know there's not enough gums in the you don't have enough they're not enough gums in your body for you so we're gonna use a commercial solution that recovery is only like four days and i was like oh really he

goes yeah it's basically like he didn't say where they come from, but they get gums. And I'm assuming they're dead people gums. Yeah. This is a whole subplot in Oz, is what you're living. Yeah, okay, cool. I don't remember that part of Oz, but I'm assuming that I'm getting dead people's gums,

which is fucking, it's great. What? I've never heard of that in my life. Totally, totally fine with that. They harvest gums? Yeah. Emily and I were like, listen, maybe I'll get some really talented person's

gums maybe i'll learn like suddenly i can play the you know i can play the trumpet or like maybe i'll get evil gums who knows you know but like it'll be an adventure one way or the other right and uh so i didn't really think anything of it and then there was a long process from june until two weeks ago where i tried to convince them to let me have this fucking surgery i just i was playing phone tag between the orthodontist and the periodontist and trying to get them together. And there was a whole thing with stopping my Invisalign, which still hasn't been worked out by the way. I just don't, I'm just not on Invisalign anymore. The orthodontist telling me one thing, the periodontist is like, don't listen to him, listen to me. And so they're

like, they're fighting. It's a whole fucking thing. A lot of drama in a lot of mouth drama in the periphery but um so anyway eventually i'm able to get it scheduled and it was like i guess not last saturday but the previous one and uh i just thought like he said it's like it's in you're gonna be in and out in like an hour hour and a half and you're just like it's gonna suck a little bit you'll get some shots you know because we gotta sew the gums in but it's like it's not the end of the Right. And so I go in. I have Emily take me just for the hell of it, even though I think I'm probably fine. I have Emily take me in on Saturday and I get in the chair and he looks at my mouth and he goes, I think we can do this. And I was like, what?

And he goes, I think I think we can. I think we can. I think we can do this. And I go, so what does that mean? He goes, I don't think we're going to use the commercial stuff. I think we can do this. And I go, so what does that mean? He goes, I don't think we're going to use the commercial stuff. I think we're going to use you for you. And I was like, oh, really? He goes, it's going to be close, but we're going to see. And I go, no, no. It's going to be close.

And then you don't want someone who's about to perform surgery on you ever to state it's going to be close. Let's do this. Strap in. surgery on you ever to state it's going to be close. Let's do this. Strap in. Every... Oh, I should also mention too, that when I got the initial consult and he told me I was going to have the easiest

version of this, he also said it's way too much surgery to do in one sitting, so we're going to split it up. You'll do the top of your mouth, and then three months later, we'll come in and do the bottom. Easy peasy, in and out. No big deal. Okay. This guy felt like pushing it.

He was like, he wanted to test the limits of his ability and my pain threshold. And so he goes, I think we can do this. I'll get started on the top, and we'll just see how it goes. And I go, okay. And then they give me nitrous. And I'm like, the last, I didn't have nitrous for like the first three root canals. I had it for the last two. And it's like, I'll be honest with you.

The root canals were fine with the nitrous. I was like, oh, nitrous, I'll be fine. The shots will suck, but then my mouth will be numb, and I won't think about it. I'll just be off in la-la land. I found the limits of what nitrous can do for pain pretty quickly. Pretty fucking quickly. So we get in there, and first first off i don't know if you

guys have had a lot of shots in your mouth uh unfortunately i have especially the last three years or so uh i would say i maybe have had more shots in my mouth in the last three years than most people do in a lifetime you always told me to when they ask if it's working you'd say no and then you get another one get another shot it's it's a minor inconvenience, but it'll pay off in the long run. I don't know if you guys have had shots on the inside of your mouth. It is a whole different world on the other side of your teeth. On the back end, you know, where your tongue and your uvula and the roof of your mouth and all that stuff is, that's a whole different level of pain from the

outside, front-facing side of your mouth. The side that gets hit with sun when you open your mouth or hot coffee or cold. It gets resistant to stuff. The inside of your mouth, it's partially protected by the outside of your mouth, so it is not ready for what may have been

20 shots. God! Getting a shot in the roof of my mouth, Or what may have been 20 shots. God. Oh my God. Getting a shot in the roof of my mouth, getting a shot in the floor of my mouth, I just like, then I just did nothing for that. It was so goddamn painful

to the point where I was just like sitting on my hands. I couldn't move. He gets me all numb. And then- Are these shots because he's using you now like was this what yeah these are shots to use but because you're now using you you're doing more go through all these shots yeah it's extra shot you did you argue with him no no he listen he's a fucking he the guy's got a medical degree i do not i'm not gonna argue with the guy yeah but this was your chance to be like a grandmaster at chess with your gums.

Yeah, but I'm not. I'm not. And I don't for a second think I am. I don't for a second look at a chessboard and think, I know this. Much like I don't for a second look at a mouth and think, I have domain. No, but this is like your like Mike scenario. You're getting the other person's gums. You're losing your ability to absorb talent is what I'm saying.

I can understand wanting to keep your own material. That's fair too. I just, I feel like they need to explain that you're gonna get a million shots in this trade. I'm bummed at this point because I thought it was, I was taking the easy road and this very quickly we've taken an off ramp into what's looking

what's like, we're getting pretty far off the interstate here and it's, I'm starting to get a little nervous. It's not well lit on this street we're driving on and it's it's a little sketchy and your guide thinks that maybe this will work yeah like not only are you off the road it's like probably he's like the top the top half of your mouth is the most fucked up so that's where we're gonna focus and i'm like okay uh and uh and so he starts putting the shots in and they're worse than I imagined. And I and they're really bad. And, you know, the shot makes you numb after the shot in the area where you already were. So like the shots always one step ahead of the of the numb.

Right. So you're still getting the pain every time. And so he gets me all numbed up really good. And I'm a little loopy from the nitrous. And then he starts, he basically flays the, like he basically Ramsey Boltons the roof of my mouth. I can just feel like this pressure. And then hear him just like scraping with a knife,

just like strips of skin out. That's the worst thing I've ever heard. It's very uncomfortable, right? Very uncomfortable. And remember, I'm expecting 60 to 90 minutes. He said less than an hour and a half, probably an hour and a half, you know.

And he does this for two hours. Straight. And I'm telling you, there is not enough nitrous and pain med in the world to inject into a person. It was 100% torture. It's torture. Yeah, I was just going to say.

It was literally, I just couldn't move, and it was pure torture. And it hurt so bad. And then at the end of two hours, he pops up for air, and he goes, guess what? And I go, you know? and he goes uh we got the top of your mouth totally done and um there might yeah i think there's gonna be enough i think there's enough of you left we can do the bottom and get you out of here in one setting and i'm like uh and i'm thinking i want nothing more like i i want nothing more than to get out of this chair but i'm thinking i i will never get back in this chair again if I get out, right?

So I'm like, okay. And he does another hour on the lower half of my mouth. So for three hours, he Ramsey bolted the roof of my mouth, and then Frankenstein sewed it around my teeth and my gums, on the top and the bottom. I got out of the chair. I was in a daze. I went out.

I sat down in the thing next to Emily. She had to fill out some paperwork. And I'll be honest with you, in the waiting room in front of 15 people, I just started crying. I was just like, I was shaken uncontrollably. And I just, I was such a like, it's kind of like when you, I don't know if you guys, well, none of you here have, I don't think. But if you've ever had a tattoo and it's gone...

It gets into like the four, the five, the six hour range. You start to just like kind of lose a little bit of control. You start to get real shaky. You get real lightheaded. You just like... You just kind of start to feel out of it. I felt like that. And I just fucking sat there and cried until Emily took me home.

And then put a bunch of hydrocodone in me and put me to bed. And then I woke up and I took that bunch of hydrocodone in me and put me to bed. And then I woke up and I took that picture of my face that I sent you guys. And then my face ballooned up. It got way worse than that. And it was just constant, constant pain. And in ways that I just hadn't anticipated, because I thought this thing was going to be 60 minutes, somebody else's gums in and out. It was three hours. It was torture. The roof of my mouth is still so sucks. So fucking bad. Even though it's now two weeks past, it'll be two weeks Saturday. Uh, it's like the surface of the moon. Like there are rocks and crags and hills and valleys in the roof of my mouth and they all just burn and itch from

growing back and i can't if it's one of the things where if you touch it it hurts but it itches so you have to touch it and so i'm just constantly fighting with myself uh but anyway so we get through all that and then i'm just a swollen mess for days and days and days and i thought i was going to be cleaning the pizza oven and all this stuff i can't get out of bed. Then as the swelling subsides, the second hell visits me, which I wasn't anticipating. The swelling obscured all of the, well, probably 30 stitches.

The pokey stitches. Once the swelling subsides, the stitches appear like a porcupine. My mouth has been a goddamn, it's like, it's just been like needles sticking out from between every tooth in my mouth for the last week oh my god i can't you're edward scissor tooth yeah i'm edward scissor tooth i can't not brush against them with my teeth there are certain ones especially

in the top where he was really hammering away where it was bad it just it's so it's so 24 hour a day uncomfortable and i'm too that's like the stitches are supposed to dissolve at two weeks i'm pretty much two weeks in they're going strong they're just as annoying and painful as ever and i uh and i just so that's where i've been i had this i tried to sneak a really easy medical procedure and i didn't think it was going to be a big deal i wasn't even going to bring it up to you guys because i get i'm sick of talking about my mouth and the dental stuff. And I thought I was past it. I thought this was one minor little blip. Oh,

and then the last thing he said to me, which is so fucking terrifying. And I still don't know what to think about it. He goes, he goes, it looks good right now. You're at a hundred percent. When it come back in a month,

maybe a hundred percent, maybe 80, maybe 60. We'll see. And I'm like, I don't know what that means, but I was in no condition to ask. So I don't know if I'm supposed to have,

like, if there's a fear that I'll shed extra gums out and then I'll have to put them back in or they'll shrink over time or whatever. But I go back in like two weeks. I wonder. I go back in like, yeah, I don't know. I go back in like two weeks to see how I've healed.

But my mouth is just like, it's like a torture device right now. And I'm two weeks in. I can't eat anything. I actually had a hamburger yesterday. It was the first time I'd eaten like kind of food like that. And I'm two weeks in. I can't eat anything. I actually had a hamburger yesterday. It was the first time I'd eaten food like that, and it was hard. I've been eating soup and oatmeal and

applesauce for two straight weeks. Every time I eat a Red Baron pizza, I cut the roof of my mouth. Oh, what a struggle for you. No, I'm so, so sad. No, no'm so, so sad. No, no, you're right. Every time.

You're right. You don't think about how much stuff fucks up the roof of your mouth. It just like digs out a little bit, like nicks it to the point where it's like, oh, I've just like dislodged a little bit of roof skin. And it's so uncomfortable and irritating for like two or three days.

I cannot imagine all of that. I can't. I hate that story so much it sounds horrendous i can't believe you're not addicted to opiates on painkillers no no no i mean they i didn't even finish the the pain meds they gave me i've just been uh i don't like the foggy feeling so um and you know i have i have addiction issues so i try to be on top of that but um but no it's it's i've been taking a lot of ibuprofen. The worst fucking thing is there's a couple on the, well, the worst is the top,

but there's a couple on the bottom where my tongue naturally rests where I can't help but touch the stitch in the back and I can feel it move the stitch in the front on my lip. You know what I mean? So it's weird to touch the back of your mouth and have it manipulate the front of your mouth. It's so connected.

Fucking, fucking sucks. It sucks so fucking bad. And you didn't walk away after that? It's been such a fucking nightmare. Well, I'm in no condition to walk. That is a great... Outside of the mouth, do you have any other issues going on?

Are your legs better? Your ankles? What's going on with the overall body? How's the crutch stain? I think the... I don't want to jinx myself, but I think the... I think I've stopped

taking jock itch medicine. Great. I think I'm okay there. Fantastic. I have no idea the condition of my Invisalign because I can't put them back in for at least another two weeks.

My finger is 100%. I'm pretty sure it's broken. I just try not to use it and touch it. I just don't have the energy to deal with it. Everything else is fine. My ankle's a little stiff here and there.

But it's gotten way better since I think I saw you guys last or talked to you guys last. The rest of my body is fine. It's just my mouth continues to persist to be an issue. Yeah. UFC 281 is live from New York this Saturday. Get closer to the octagon with DraftKings Sportsbook, the official sports betting partner of UFC. Right now, new customers can bet $5 on UFC 281

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And then I think the last thing I was going to talk about, we don't have to, we can cover today. We can cover, the last thing I was going to talk about, we can cover it today, I kind of f*** faced my proposal to Emily, and then we are all supposed to have Icy Hot. I don't know if you guys want to do that this week, or we just push it to a week. Well, here's the thing with that.

I started Googling. Like, should you put, like, what happens if you put Icy Hot on your junk? And it's just horror story after horror story and i don't know what you're expecting the episode where we discussed it hasn't come out yet so i don't know the audience's thoughts on i assume we're gonna get bombarded with don't do that don't do that it honestly scared me it's terrible it's a terrible idea oh can i talk can i talk about some of my icy hot experience because

i've never had icy hot or tiger bomb around me yeah and it has been a time i've i've learned that uh i shouldn't be allowed to have it in my possession has been essentially the arc of the last time we talked have you been using oh i've been using because i've never used before and i wanted to get a feel so this is where we have three I have three separate icy hot incidents that have occurred in the past week. I know Jeff didn't buy any of the stuff that I said for one of the stories you have. Do you have like the whoopee cushion?

I got the whoopee cushion, I got the bubbles, I got the gum, I got the candle, I got an extension lead. Then we'll go through the thing for that. I'll be honest, was that a real request? Yes, that was a real request. Okay, because you asked everybody to get a six-foot extension cord, so I got that extension cord, and then we're good. And then like four or five

days later, you're like, oh, by the way, get a whoopie cushion and all that stuff. And I thought, this motherfucker's just trying to see how much we buy. No, no, no. This story occurred. There's a purpose for it. The reason why it was delayed was because this event hadn't happened when I talked about the extension cord yet. We gonna go with the first one this is my first experience

i bought both tiger bomb and icy hot because i had no experience with either i don't know what they're like i don't know if they're the same they're different now are these creams or roll-ons these are creams okay these are the extra strength cream okay for both of them good so i'm sitting at my desk and i'm like i'm gonna try this out so i'm gonna coat i'm just gonna cover my left arm and i see hot just completely cover it i'm gonna cover my other arm with tiger bomb it's just completely coated and it's just i'm feeling the heat like wow this is a lot i'm just sitting at my desk. I'm like, I'm going to go through this experience. About five minutes after I do that, I get a phone call informing me that somebody in my family has passed away.

And it's it's devastating. It's a crushing. It's a crushing moment. It's upsetting. But my arms are on fire because of the fucking icy hot and the tiger bomb. And I'm just I'm I'm starting to cry I'm having a terrible time I'm like I just need to lay down and cry for a while

so I crawl in the bed I'm getting icy hot and tiger bomb over all of my sheets it's everywhere my pillow mountain isn't up so it's very funny I'm telling this because I texted Gavin about this so i'm sorry i'm laughing it's not funny no no it is funny it's very funny i'm telling this because i texted gavin about this so i'm miserable i'm in pain i'm crying i'm stuffed up i'm starting

to get a headache and i'm like i can't i can't stay in this bed i'm fucking ruining these sheets i'm just gonna sit in my bath and cry and be sad for a while and just ride this out so i go to hop into the tub i recently was given this wonderful gift i got a bath pillow which is like a pillow that you snap into your tub and it's just it makes the relaxation better i'm gonna drop a photo in the discord right now this is the bath pillow and those are the bottles from the clenching story These was potentially in your big one the big one in the middle was I could pull that out of any lineup. Yeah So I got this this pillow

And I'm climbing into the tub and my ass hits it and it falls into the water And I'm upset and now i got my arms are on fire my pillow is now drenched in water and i'm like i'm so overwhelmed i don't know what to do i'm just gonna snap this to the wall so i just grabbed it and i snapped it up higher so my head wouldn't rest on it and so i'm sitting in the dark sad my left arm is on fire with tigers i got icy hot on the other arm it's terrible and then i start getting dripped on by my pillow cold water and i just started laughing because it was just disaster after disaster and i just couldn't it was like of course now i'm getting i'm getting dripped on by the stuffy pillow when i told gavin the story it's such a funny goddamn comment where he's like you you're like a cartoon character like in cartoons a rain cloud is over a person when they're sad

you made your own rain cloud i'm just sitting in the tub so that was my first imagine him in the tub with a little like tiny little gray storm over his head drip this is my dumb bath pillow which is great i love it but it's a ridiculous thing to own. So that's my first experience with Icy Hot. Can I ask you a question? Yeah, of course. Which one was more intense, Icy Hot? I have no idea.

The research was out the window as soon as I started crying. I was no longer paying attention. I feel like they're only made worse by coming into contact with water or more intense. Was that not the case? We'll get to that. Okay. So now we're going to move into story two. Now, Gavin, you have the items I've sent you.

When I tell you to prep the items, I'd say right now. Okay. When I say the product, use it the way that it is intended. So just to confirm, I'm getting out the whoopee cushion, the bubbles, a candle. Yeah, so the first thing is, can you light your candle? Are you able to do that? You know what?

I didn't get a lighter. Hold on. Okay, that's fine. I'll let him get a lighter. Prepare. Now I feel bad for not buying all this random shit. You really should have emphasized

that you were serious. It just never got mentioned. It was such an aside, the way you did it. I don't think that's true because i made a fucking amazon wish list and sent it to you guys it'd be easier for you to find did you really that tech yeah i posted it in the slack i was like hey here's a link if you want to order this i'll be on amazon i've i've been off my game with the mouth stuff i may have just missed that no that's fair's fair. Totally fair. Okay, so let me organize this. Wait for Gavin to come back.

This is two of three, and I think this is the most expansive story, but I need to talk about the third event because it has impacted other things as well. It's been a lot of pain. Okay, you back, Gavin? Yeah, I got a light. So Gavin and Eric are always talking about the genius that is,

the exciting experience that is D-Box. And we got a new avatar coming out, the first avatar, biggest movie of all time. I don't know if that's still true. It probably isn't. But it was huge. And that was all about new technology. So I thought, I need to bring some new technology to the podcast game. So this is the D-Box experience.. Cause you got to do it yourself.

This isn't, you can't do it for you. This is, we're doing do box right now. Should I be filming this? No, I don't think so. You don't have to,

but if the audience wants to be in the, the Dubai, almost the wrong thing, the do box experience, you'll need a candle, a pack of Dentine ice, blood bubbles that you can blow and a whoopee cushion i believe that's all right so stop stop pause the podcast here or go go to target or walmart buy that shit and then come back all right i'm just gonna

so like what you're kidding i just filled up the whoopee cushion all right i think i'm all set i got all my tools okay so what happened was this is like probably the fifth or sixth time i've used icy hot at this stage and i to be completely honest i was kind of disappointed with the effect of it so far so i thought i'm going to like quadruple i'm going to use quadruple the amount i've typically been I thought I'm going to, like, quadruple. I'm going to use quadruple the amount I've typically been using. And I'm going to coat my arm in it. I'm just going to fill it.

Can I ask you a question? What effect are you going for? Do you have a sore arm? Sometimes I get a sore wrist on the one that I dislocated for a long time. You know it's like for muscle pain, right? Like, it's not... Yeah, it's just... It's more like the the icy hot effect like i was expecting it to be more intense than it had been to this point so i thought what if i apply more maybe i'm not applying enough to get the effect that i would

assume that it would have so applied all my arm i'm playing stacking or i was at that time which is a great game have fun with that i immediately it works like it's successful my arm is radiating it's so much cooler than it had ever been before like this is great i just have to use more if i want it to be a more intense effect so it's good it kind of dies down after a while so i'm not happy about that but then uh whoopee cushion nailed it all right so the problem was it was a Trojan fart it had more in it than I was anticipating so I had to quickly run to the bathroom so I'm in the bathroom and I'm just sitting I'm sitting using the bathroom i'm on

my phone i'm watching clips i'm just having i'm having a good time denty nice gavin having a good time how many just the two two start chewing away denty nice so i'm sitting i'm on the toilet done stand up i'm in the sink wash my hands all of a sudden my asshole feels like the feeling in your mouth right now it is a cold chill i have made an error i use the same by the way that's the what you're describing that's the joy that is the too spicy icy it is yes but that is so the difference between the too spicy icy and this experience is i'm at first shocked and terrified because i i realize what i've done i've used the same hand this is a problem but then it's kind of nice it feels good like it's kind of a frosty freshness everything's sweet like your

butthole's minty yeah i imagine this is what like sub-zero's door feels like like it's not too cold but there's a definite feeling of cold what in the air sub-zero I assume he lives in a cold place yeah but it's not because yeah because the inside is colder than the outside

so it's not freezing but it's because it's radiated through it's a lesser cool it's a nice feel but it's because it's radiated through. It's a lesser cool. It's a nice feel. But then I remember that this has waves and the panic really hits. And I'm like, oh, fuck. I feel like I have lit a fuse to my ass that I need to try to extinguish as quickly as possible.

So I hop in the tub. I fill it with water i'm just i'm just holding i'm clenching because i'm terrified i don't know what's gonna happen it's just it's a bad it's a bad time it's it's a fury thanks uh blow bubbles yeah oh shit there's a seal on the hold on get the bubbles ready so i'm sitting in the tub. I'm in pain. I don't... I'm clenching real hard. My arm is, once again, on fire.

It has come back a little bit. I'm feeling the heat. You blow bubbles, Gavin? I'm still trying to get the lid off. Okay. Well, I'm just going to continue. You blow bubbles when you can. I'll let you know when they're coming.

Are you still chewing the gum, too? Or have you discarded the gum? Yeah, you can get rid of the gum. The gum is still in. Okay. This is a very... It's very do-it-yourself. It's actually a little bit distracting. Are you still chewing the gum too? Or have you discarded the gum? Yeah, you can get rid of the gum. You don't need the gum anymore. Okay. This is a very... It's very do-it-yourself. It's actually a little bit

distracting from the story, but the effects are amazing. As soon as you talked about your asshole being like this gum, I could imagine it so well. Yeah. Mm-hmm. It was the same feeling.

And I hadn't had Denti Nice in a long time, but I was like, oh my God, this is Denti Nice. Are you okay? He spills. He spills.

He spilled it everywhere. All over the people oh great all right blow it okay I'm just gonna blow some bubbles oh oh god you okay oh god that's a shit so then i fart under the water and it is like the gates of hell opened with the gas which confirms okay it's a blow it up again it's an underwater fart so it was fiery and I realized that, oh God, like my fears are confirmed. My asshole is on fire right now. This is terrible. I'm going to do a slightly more advanced move, Andrew. I'm just going to get some, I'm going to dip the tip of the whoopee cushion in the bubbles.

Yeah. Okay. Try and mimic the underwater fart. Oh, this is a great idea. That's hot. Put my hand in the candle. Hold on. I'm going to see if this does anything.

That's hot. Put my hand in the candle. Hold on. I'm going to see if this does anything. Dude, that sounded so sad. The little bubble. Oh, my God. Andrew, you're inventing a new form of entertainment here. I fucking love it. This is for the do box. I can't wait for us to do box again. So that happened. I'm terrified. I us to do box again. So that happened.

I'm terrified. I'm continuing to clench. But then things go okay. I'm there for like 10 minutes. You okay? You okay, Kevin? Kevin? Kevin?

I'm having such a good time I need to wash my hands is he just blowing bubbles with the whoopee cushion he's nine years old now yeah this is great um so i think uh things are terrible because the fire fiery farts then things calm down for a bit and i'm okay but then my arm reignites the icy hot really kicks in yeah and i am now once again terrified because it applied to my arm about 15 minutes before it got in my ass. So I'm just wondering, like, am I on a clock?

Is the clock running now, like, in 15 minutes? And am I going to experience this wrath once again in my asshole? And I was paranoid. 15 minutes passed after that. Nothing happens. But I was so scared. I spent an additional hour in the tub just nervous that it would appear yeah yeah just to be safe yeah then i cautiously i don't know if gavin's back

i'm back okay after all that i cautiously get out of the bath and confirm that the fire and my ass has now been extinguished g Gavin, blow out your candle. And that was our first Dubox experience. That was phenomenal. What experience? I had a really good time with all my tools. I made a real mess. I am so jealous that I feel so lame that I didn't participate,

but that was so fun to listen to. I'm so excited for us all to do box in the future. I have one more icy hot incident. Um, that, that has been a massive annoyance in my life. Oh yeah, please.

Where after all of this, this is the third event that occurred. I thought, I didn't really remember how we got to balls. Cause we were talking about pitchers. It was one of you two. Oh, it was definitely Gavin. Balls?

It was a baseball thing. Yeah, but the whole thing was that they would apply Icy Hot to their ears. I was thinking ears. And then somebody who's so good will put it on our balls. And I was like, yeah. That was the story Eric told about the guy who rubbed it on his cock and balls. I don't remember that story at all. I just remember us talking about the the padres pitching thing with oh roger clemens yeah yeah and then we went to ball okay

so there was a reason i just didn't remember it but i thought huh i wonder what the ears would feel like so i hopped in the tub i'm in the dark once again it's the evening are you still sad at this point uh no i'd say i'm on the upswing okay i'm getting i'm feeling better not great but i'm getting there this is a few days later um and i'm sitting in the tub it's filled with water i'm like okay i'm now going to apply the icy hot but i'm in the dark so i need a light to see everything so i use the flashlight app on the phone that you gave me gavin uh and i put it on the side of the tub and i turned for the icy hot and it slides in like a skateboarder going down a ramp like it

just rolls into the water and i immediately panic because i have a small crack in the bottom left corner of the screen i'm like oh it's gonna fill with water so i put my foot on it and i slide it up the other end of the tub and i'm applying all of my pressure it's like it's on the balls of my feet essentially sticking up above my toes and i'm pressed i'm fully extended in the tub i'm imagining like a mission impossible one yeah that is exactly what's going on and the flashlight is blasting me in the face that's the way it's facing and i'm trying to figure out a way while the water is fully turned on. So it's filling with hot water, the hottest water it could have. And I'm trying to navigate all this.

I'm attempting to move it to a place in which I could grab it, but it's not working. I can't go under. This is how the tub is designed. I can't get it wet again because I'm worried about the hole. So I spend like 10 minutes attempting to do this myself and uh i'm struggling i'm like okay i'm gonna try to get it to move walls so i adjust it it slides down my feet and now it's in like the arch of my foot where it's not sticking out at all and i am completely screwed and so i'm just laying there my flashlight in the dark,

my phone trapped to the wall with my foot. And I have to call out to my partner. If they wouldn't mind coming in here, I need a hand. I need a hand with something. And they open the door to me, like, fully stretched out in the tub, naked with a phone beneath my foot. So are you on your back with your foot pressed against the opposite wall still? I am, yes.

So that surely means your genitals are fully up in the opposite wall still i am yes that surely means your genitals are fully up in the air sticking out of the water oh it's dead it's every yeah it's not it's a terrible image for anyone to see and they just open the door and say what are you doing because i've got this fresh light and i'm like i can't could you please just grab the phone from my foot and they're like you are like an awful selfie being taken so they they grab it and they give it back to me and they just say you're ridiculous and then they leave uh I say thank you I'm happy because I think my phone is okay everything is good about About three hours later,

I haven't been able to get my speakers to work since that point, which sometimes happens where it'll think that there's, because there's a residue or something in the headphone jack, it thinks that I have headphones plugged in when I don't. So that's been an issue in the past. My speaker starts to hiss a little bit, and I thought this must be this must be it like i there must be something there like something's going on i will suck the moisture out so i attempt to suck the moisture out i get the little vibration you get you know like when you hit a key on a phone

my phone vibrates then the entire thing dies my died. I have been phoneless for like six days at this point. I just set up my old shitty hot dog device phone that I love, but it's terrible while my new phone arrives because it's going to take another week. And I missed you both, so I just wanted to be able to text you. So that's been my icy hot experience to this point. I shouldn't have it. It shouldn't be near me.

It's been terrible. So let me ask you a question. Well, I'm going to ask two questions. One, did you put it on your ears? And if so, how was it? I did not apply it to my ears at that time. No, that was not. It never came together.

I was crushed by the foam experience. Have you at any point used it as intended? One time. Yeah, I i do as i said i sometimes my wrist flares up a little bit and i was like i'll try i'll try it on this and see if it helps at all well i don't feel like it did well it might not have been for that specific issue but if you ever have sore muscles i would recommend it it when used properly it can be highly effective the problem the main problem with icy hot or which by the way i i think is trash i i recommend i highly recommend tiger bomb uh is that it's kind of like psychedelic drugs like uh

like acid or uh or maybe like mushrooms where like it's fun at first but then at some point you're done with it you're like i had that experience i'm done with this but it's not done with you it's it works on its own timetable and so icyHack can be like no no you're in this for another two hours whether you want to be or not is there anything that counteracts the effects if you want to get rid of it

oh yeah easily like what did you want to know what that was oh yeah yeah time

oh just time just time old fashioned time fantastic old fashioned time yeah takes care of it. Like right now, Andrew, enough time has passed. Doesn't feel any effects.

Oh, I don't know if I'd say that, but should we... We're kind of getting deep in this podcast. I got everybody on this show something. Should we go to that before? Yeah, this has been such a prop-heavy show. This is amazing. So should I be opening? Am I opening the envelope or the bag? So, Andrew, just so you know, there is a gift wrap bag.

And then the second thing that came in a pack, I put in individual envelopes. So they also couldn't see what that was. Thank you so much. Is that why my envelope says attention Ezra and it's scribbled out? Yes, it does. So as I said, hasn't been the best time. Mine says Diane.

That's great. It does not say Diane. Diane is also scribbled out. Okay, so what am I opening? Yeah, so I'll tell you in a minute. I'm just going to lead into it. I think you should probably open the gift box first for for both of you um okay but but not yet as i said not yet oh i haven't even read the label what does this say uh it says

from andrew pan from andrew yeah great um this was another gift that i'd gotten recently it it's changed my life it brought something that I love to a different level. And I've fallen back in love with this. It's been great. And so I figured I got one for everybody related to the show. I did forget to get one for minor league fan Jack. I will plan on doing that later. I forgot about the time when I was ordering these.

I think you can both open them now. This better not be a Red Baron pizza. Oh, wow. It's a tiny waffle iron. A little baby waffle iron. It's a tiny little baby. I've been making desk waffles, but tiny

little baby waffle makers changed my life. I know, Jeff, you've been having food issues, so I understand if you don't want to participate in this but uh I just didn't want you to feel excluded no I appreciate it this makes me feel really bad I bought presents for y'all recently too and I forgot to give them to everybody

but I didn't get any for Andrew sounds like I need to buy presents for people oh shit so then you can open up your other item which is essential I'd say to the experience wow that is really cool that's like a couple of bites. That's amazing.

This is great. Okay, opening up the envelope. I hope Ezra doesn't mind. Oh, it's some pancake mix. I figured we could all cook a desk waffle together on the show. I could show you my world a little bit

and expose you to the joy that you've been lacking. I'm going to prep mine right now. I actually bought a skillet version as well. They have a skillet version of this product. I'm going to put some bacon on too, which I haven't done yet. But I need to prep all the... I need to...

That's all I need. Water. You just need water. You just need water. You just need water. Some water and you stir it. It's really easy. All right. Should I get the additionals?

Yeah. Go ahead. I'll be right back. I gotta get a bottle of water. I'm gonna go get water also. I'll be right back. Fantastic. Nick, yours is at the office.

Yeah. This is gonna be great. I'm excited. I can't wait for you to try, Nick. You're gonna have to give me your opinions. This is one of the best gifts I've ever been given. I've made so many waffles, and I need to because I still have like 50 pounds of mix.

You just did a pay it forward to us. Thank you. I did. Okay, let me prep this. I'm going to actually open my bacon. I forgot my fucking meat hands oh no this is gonna be bad it's gonna be messy let's what are meat hands uh just like gloves gloves i thought you were giving a code name to your hands no i don't have code names for my hands all right so first i should preheat the thing, right?

Yeah, it takes like three minutes to preheat. It's really quick, and it's going to smell terrible. Oh, really? It's going to smell terrible as soon as you open it. That factory smell on the first one. I'm going to get this prepped. Shit, let me get my extension. Open this.

Up here. Alright, we have power. I open this bacon in the dumbest way. With your meat hands? I wish I had my meat hands. Okay. Just so you know, I'm back. Welcome back.

Okay, I'm gonna keep opening this bacon. Oh, it's fucking, I'm getting bacon cheese all over my hands my wife is i just so you know my wife is so excited is she having one as well oh it's great uh well i'm gonna make i'm gonna make this and then i'll probably make more for her later because she loves we have a waffle iron like an actual like a big waffle iron uh because she loves waffles so when she saw a tiny waffle iron, she was, she said, tell Andrew that I say thank you for my tiny waffle iron.

What's our ratio? One cup to how much powder? It's like the whole thing, with one cup of water and the whole thing, I think. I don't think there's like a way to make just a little. Let's cut my bacon. Gotta mix it up. That should be good.

Tiny little bacon strip. So, anyway, I'm gonna say, because we're far enough into the podcast now, we should still definitely, despite Gavin's misgivings and Andrew's experiences,

we definitely need to see if the Icy Hot works to raise our comedic level. But we'll just do it next week. Yeah. That sounds good. Well, next level, but we'll just do it next week. Yeah. That sounds, that sounds good. Well,

next week, are we doing two episodes today? Cause next week would be in two weeks. So, or like, you know, like in two episodes, we will have the funniest episode of the podcast.

Yeah. I'm good with doing another episode after this. Good. I can't, I gotta, I gotta. Then next week, there will be the funniest episode of the podcast.

Oh, this thing smells so bad. Sorry, I just missed some discussion. Yeah, yeah, the first time. Yep, first time. It's terrible. So do I need to do anything after I plug it in? Nope. It just has a blue light. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Oh, no. Sounds like it's sizzling. Oh, it's sizzling.

It's got that. I got some bacon on the grill let me let me pour for some waffle mix my other one um how do I know when it's done I guess it turned the light it takes about five minutes so whenever you put in just wait like five or six minutes and then you can okay through'll be good yeah through the instructions away so all right i'm adding to the water i've uh i've already got my first one cooking here got my mine got my bacon on oh it is a hot surface it's not kidding it gets really hot so here's the thing what if this changes our lives it should like it did and that's what i'm hoping yes that's what i'm like you know hesitant sort of reserved in this you know i'm not really sure if this is going to be exactly

what i'm looking for but andrew is really hoping that it's really going to make us different people to the point where like maybe at like 2 45 every thursday we just start a waffle going before recording are we a waffles only podcast now? Waffles only? I like it. We have to eat waffles every time we record. I'm giving mine a good whisk. Alright, it's smoking like a motherfucker.

Yeah, it smokes. It's not smoking, it's steaming. It's steaming. Steaming like a motherfucker. What should the viscosity be like? Mine looks quite liquidy. Oh, the light turned off? Oh? Mine just turned off times. Oh, I'm very excited when you turn off this one is heating I believe I Think the light on means it's not heating if I remember the instructions correctly now. It's done. It's cooked as fuck Well I assume when you open it. it or either turn the light on or off

and then you wait the cycle out all right let me know when everybody's ready to eat you know I'm still whisking wow Jeff so hot oh it could get way crispier than that I did Jeff that's really great first waffle that's a great first waffle well I'll put it on for a little bit longer to get it well I you know

what I don't want it to be too much crispier because it hurt my mouth That's fair seen this coming instead of us all put an icy hot on our nuts I Didn't see this coming. I was into it fully into Spain. I didn't warn Jeff I was like your life is gonna change tomorrow. Are you ready for this? Just assumed to be from the icy hot All right, I think I'm ready for my first pour. Damn, that's hot!

You haven't even poured yet? No, I was whisking still. I'm trying to get the viscosity right. Mine seems really runny. Yeah, I mean, that's... Can I eat or should I wait for Gavin? No, I think... Oh, eat away. Don't wait on me.

Can I ask how often you guys are making waffles and things like that in general? Never. Maybe once a month. Okay. I was doing it rarely before this. This has been like every two days. So it's the guy who has 70 pounds of pancake mix. Yeah, I know.

It's been a real issue, but now I got this. It's great. I've only ever used the stuff where you like put it in the yellow. You put the water in the yellow container and shake it up. All right. I'm pouring now. Oh Good. Oh shit. I go on I'm gonna try and fill the crabs here Okay, where's the drips gonna go though? Where are the drips gonna go? Okay? Whoopsie? Alright, that's okay

I've put too much Shit less is more buddy. Oh That's okay. I've put too much. Shit. Less is more, buddy. Oh, my desk today. It's got bubbles. I've got spills. I've overexposed. No, it's spewing.

What does that mean? What do you mean? What does that mean? What do you mean? Ah! How are you doing, Jeff? Dude, I'm fucking great. I just had a waffle.

Yeah, this is a great time. Yeah, fantastic. This is great. I'm going to tell Millie we're going to have waffles for dinner. We're just going to have breakfast for dinner tonight. This is awesome. I'm having a meh. What are you doing?

I need to wash my hands again. You know what this tells me? What? It tells me we need to make our very own and sell regulation waffle maker. Like a f*** face regulation waffle maker. That'd be great. Yeah. Oh, Gavin. Oh, Gavin. Oh, no. No. No. that we could like a face regulation waffle maker that'd be great yeah oh gavin oh no so much just posted a photo of it all over his desk well it looks like the side of the

it looks like the side of a french onion soup i've botched it that's a hard botch it really is a small area it doesn't take much oh it's a tiny waffle I'm excited to see how yours turns out dude it is steaming away this thing

yeah it's a steamer you know what that pretty soon you're going to be in flavor land and then it's going to all be worth it how was yours? it was good it was real good it was crunchier on the bottom than the top like the consistency was different but i'm sure it's just what you just you figure it out as you go you know oh yeah you definitely it takes some attempts okay the light has gone off i would i would let it sit for a little bit longer It's like glued shut

Yeah It literally is glued shut Because you overfilled it Okay, come on now Get out of there Oh, ow Look at that Yeah

I would love to look at it I wish I had a phone that I could take a photo with Look, I'm going to have to trim off the extensions. I got to say, Andrew, you really brought it this week. Dew box, waffles, fucking Icy Hot and Triplicate. Yeah, I just, you know, wanted to end it with... Dew box was great. I just wish there was...

I wish it was slightly more efficient. I did have to order a six-pack of bubbles and whoopee cushions. I did provide a link in our Slack for a singular one. Oh, you did? Yeah, I didn't use that. I gotta say, Gav, mess aside, that's a gorgeous-looking waffle. That looks really good. It looks really good.

It does. It really does. Beautiful waffle. I don't know how to get it out. It's a beautiful waffle. That was difficult for me. Do you have anything to get it with? Where's my whisking fork? Oh, it's covered in batter. All right, I'm going to get another fork. Yeah, you don't know how to get it out. It's a beautiful waffle. That was difficult for me. Do you have anything to get it with? Where's my whisking fork?

Oh, it's covered in butter. All right, I'm going to get it with a fork. Yeah, you don't want to use that. Scissors is a good move. I used the twist tie that came with the, that tied up the cord for the waffle maker to kind of poke it out. The bacon's delicious.

The skillet was a great idea. So you have like, there's no way for you to send us a photo, huh? You have like a pocket skillet. No. I got a little pocket. When I get my camera i'll send a photo yeah how much room is on it for like could you fit could you cook two pieces of bacon is that max oh no no i i was able to cook like a third of one strip oh oh it's that's very small oh i want to see that

are you meant to like burn the first waffle to get the factory uh chemicals off or am i just gonna eat this? No, you're just going to eat it. You're just going to eat the chemicals. Yeah, it's fine. This won't be what kills you. Okay. Whoops.

That's pretty good. Yeah? Yeah. It's actually not the best presentation presentation but that's a good waffle i think there's improvements that can be made in your waffle game as far as the pour goes but you made a great cook that's a great first cook yeah it was a great as far as first waffles go i think you did you did admirably if a as as far as first waffles go if you ate a waffle you did it right and uh this is great.

I took a look at Jeff's and I thought I can fill the air a little bit better than that. And then... No, I was very cautious because I've used a waffle maker before a few times. This is great. I just want to be able to share the waffle experience. Would you say you've been moved?

Are you more open to the idea of desk cooking? Yes, I'm be able to share the waffle experience. Would you say you've been moved? Are you more open to the idea of desk cooking? Yes, I'm more open to it. I don't know that my life has changed yet, but next Thursday, when we roll around, if I feel inclined to make a waffle,

I think I'll start to see it in practice, maybe after the newness has worn off a little bit. I don't think it's changed my life, and I'll tell you why. I had to run to the kitchen five times in the process. Yeah, but you're kind of dumb like that. I didn't have to run to the... I went once.

I'm just gonna... I got the ideal setup for it. I got my little fridge next to it, so I fill up all my batter ahead of time in a bottle, and I just going to I got the ideal setup for it. I got my little fridge next to it. So I fill up all my batter ahead of time in a bottle and I just pour when I need to. It's perfect. Oh, I tell you something. The underside really carries that factory's taste. I will say, I don't know if I really enjoy this. I think where's your pictures, Eric?

I'm sorry. My picture. Oh, hang on. Let me take a picture. I don't know if, you know, this is the thing for me. I do enjoy it. I think it's nice. However,

my dog is thrilled about everything that's happening right now. He's excited that it smells like waffles in a place that doesn't typically smell like waffles. So, that doesn't typically smell like waffles. So that's mine. Oh, that looks great.

Thank you so much. That's a great first. You don't think if you took this to work and you threw it on your desk at the day job and like Patrick Salazar walked by and he saw it, he wouldn't be like, holy shit, Eric, this is innovative. You're brilliant. I'll take all the credit in the world for it. Sure. I got no problem with that. um i'll take all the credit in the world for it sure i got no problem with that um but uh you know i i think i think it's a great idea if i if i use this at the office at work in my home office i don't know if i don't know if it's a home office use for me does that make sense does that track

yeah okay yours looks so good that looks great that's a really pretty waffle yeah is that the first one yes and i've just been letting it go all this time because it's been like it feels undercooked a little bit but like i think it's starting to brown up get crispy um i will say that nicks is still at his desk at the office so he could be the hero to the entire post room and just be doling out. Yeah. What did your small wife think about it? Oh, she's thrilled.

She can't wait. She's, I mean, as soon as I'm, Oh my God, Gavin, I will say that that picture that you sent looks like what I imagine. Uh, Andrew's desk is like all the time.

Yeah. No. He's turning me into Andrew. It's like Gavin's desk is cosplaying Andrew's desk right now. Of course, Gavin, your keyboard appears to be on and working, so it clearly couldn't be Andrew's. That's true. That's true. It's very true. What did you end up doing, by the way, with your keyboard appears to be on and working, so it clearly couldn't be Andrew's. That's true. That's true. It's very true.

What did you end up doing, by the way, with your keyboard? I just swapped out. I used the keyboard, a different plug-in keyboard. I haven't tried it since. I think it's pretty fucked. So not a great couple of weeks for technology in you. Oh, terrible, terrible stretch of technology for me. What's your new phone going to be?

I'm just getting another re it's a refurbished google pixel okay same idea but new phone how long how long do you think before you put it in the tub uh almost maybe a week at best we're hoping we're hoping for two but probably a week um i have a i have a confession oh boy thing to say now that we've had our our delicious nice waffle times that was very sweet i need i need to confess and say that i have i've recorded this entire show with all of you with my ears coated in icy hot to see if i would focus better as part of the experiment this has been a grueling endeavor to get through there have been times where I have winced randomly when people are talking I and I

will I'd like to say at this stage didn't work at all no disagree I was zoning out I hard disagree dude you were on fire this episode you're gonna hate this this. This is an old timer Andrew episode. Period. I understand. But it was the prep I did going into it. It had nothing to do with what I said. I'm telling you. I don't know.

It was a little bumpy. Go ahead. Here's what I would have. Here's what my review... Had Andrew not said this last part, my review would have been a fucking great A++ episode. Andrew was on today.

He was just like... He was like sharp. He was like quick to respond. He was with it. He was funny. He was clear. He was like firing on all cylinders.

I was like, this is like an all-time great Andrew episode. And now I know why. All-time Andrew episode. All-time. I don't think it had anything. I found it hard to listen at points when you were talking.

Because my ears were on fire. All I could smell was icy hot. I put way too much on. It went in my ear hole. It was a terrible experience. I've been struggling this whole show. But I guess apparently if it works,

I just move on. I'm going to, you know what? I'm going to be funnier than both of you. Give me the tiger bomb. Let's get this tiger bomb going.

It's true. I'm going to have to, I'm going to have to really lather up next episode. Oh, the tiger bomb's on. Yeah, I mean, I agree. Talking about jumping the gun,

I'm still going to do the Icy hot on my balls next week yeah I was about shoveling it onto the beginning but I should've well Andrew you've done it right at the end of the episode you're gonna the payoff is oh no

oh no so hot yeah I know that feeling I know exactly that feeling are we in his bathroom? Where's he getting all this water from? He's in for a really shitty 45 minutes. Who's not worth it?

Probably. Is he in the tub? What's he got? God, the balls! Where did he rub it? I think he put it on his balls. It's on his ears and his balls He's triple funny

It sounds like he's doing It sounds like he's doing efforts Here's what we're gonna do We're gonna let Andrew's We're gonna let Andrew's comedy play us out Thanks for listening to another episode of F*** Face. This is episode 127. We leave you with Andrew.

Is that helping? Oh, man. Oh, I don't feel any funnier. I don't feel any funnier. Oh, it's cold. That's cold. It's cold. Oh, this is a mistake.

Why did I do this? The waffle's so good. No, never mind. The fuck? I didn't get this pillow out of here. Ah. Ah. Ah.

Ah. Ah. Hey, guys. Hey guys, Major League Fan Jack here with a look at next week's episode of F*** Face. We get some deep pencil lore. What is our jokes per minute count? It's time for the Icy Hot. Gavin goes to all fours. Penn's keyboard is still broken. There's just too much CO2. And once again again Andrew does

not eat the pencil. All that and more on next week's episode of F*** Face.