F**kface - Regulation Listeners // Geoff's at 36% [78]

Episode Date: November 24, 2021

Geoff, Gavin, and Andrew talk about Geoff's colonoscopy & if he has to run, Andrew's formal apple apology, and Betty White contests to fund the show. Jet Ski Club Merch: Cyber Monday, November 29th at 10am CST Want to contribute to bits? Email what you can do to [e-mail] Sponsored by Raycon (http://buyraycon.com/face), Better Help (http://betterhelp.com/face), and HelloFresh (http://hellofresh.com/face14). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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This is a Rooster Teeth production. Face podcast. My name is Jeff Ramsey. My audio sounds good. According to Nick, we had to do some tests earlier because I had some weird device manager problems. Thanks, Nick. With me as always, Andrew Patton and Gavin free this episode and the next one, because we're doing back to backs. It's going to be a little weird and I'll tell you why we didn't record

last week. Whenever we skip a week, the notes pile up. Yeah, I have more notes in my phone. I think than I've ever had. I went through them last night with Emily and she was like, holy shit. I thought you have more notes in my phone, I think, than I've ever had. I went through them last night with Emily, and she was like, holy shit. I thought you were kidding.

That is way too much to talk about. And some stuff is time sensitive, so it's slipping away. But on top of that, the degree of difficulty, Andrew, I don't know if you want to talk about it. We couldn't film last week because you were ill. You're feeling better now. I, however, am not feeling great. Oh, no.

Well, I's not. I'm not sick. It's that I have a colonoscopy tomorrow scheduled, and I'm in the middle of colonoscopy prep. So I haven't eaten in a couple of days. And I'm living off of clear. I'm living off of white Gatorade and water. Is that why you weren't at the office earlier? Yeah, I couldn't.

Well, I was going to come in and record with y'all, play a video game with y'all. But yeah, I got to drink a bunch of weird shit. Nick, I'm in the middle of drinking the weird shit. But at that specific time, this is the other reason why it's going to be interesting. I don't think I've gone 15 minutes without shitting my brains out today.

Really? So I tried my, my damnedest, to like explode everything I could out of me before the recording, but I might have to leave for a little bit to shoot water violently out of my asshole.

I will, if there's one podcast that is established recording in a bathroom, you've already done this. This is going this is a round two for you I don't know I get the mic in there but god damn dude I woke up at about three this morning ran to the bathroom and I don't

think I left until 530 if you cut the sides off of it is a porta potty really the worst desk chair I think that there's a world in which that could work cut the side off yeah well because you don't's a world in which that could work. Cut the side off. Yeah, well, because you don't want to be in a fucking, you're like boxed in.

It's like a phone booth if you got the whole thing. So if you cut the sides off, and it's like a throne at that point, you slide the chair in. Why not just cut it in half, like horizontally? What do you mean cut it in half? Well, how is that different than what I'm saying? Well, with the sides off, you still got a roof over it.

Well, now if you cut the sides, then there's clearly no roof. What is supporting the roof if there are no sides, Gavin? That was sort of an assumed. You wouldn't... Do I leave the back up? That's actually a great question. I kind of like there's a little bit of a sun. You got a back...

You want the back... I don't know. I think it would depend on the porta potty, right? If your back rests against the back wall or not. I think it's too big for any desk. You think so? I think I could on the porta potty, right? If your back rests against the back wall or not. I think it's too big for any desk. You think so? I think I could fit a porta potty in here. And well, no, that's not true at all.

You could even get it through the door. That's, yeah, you know what? Honestly, getting it up the stairs would be the bigger issue. I think I could get it in the room. We'd have to get a lift of some kind to bring it up to my level. And then we would be okay I think do you think it would hit the ceiling? Oh, no, I got really tall ceilings. I got so much space going up I'm good

We don't really utilize ceiling space either like what should I feel like it's your space now that you're doing it up We lost night that we also waste door frames. Yeah, I'll frame doesn't do enough. It's true There is not enough with door frames just exist I'd love your opinion on this Jeff when have you ever seen a door frame be utilized for anything outside of it being a door frame throw a light in the frame yeah why not well you like a status thing that like a progress thing I did a pull apart Eric just a pull apart that's a great call it's a good use for a door frame or halo the halo ranking system i was just saying it would be cool to have

a visual indicator of the bar and i figured like the door frame isn't being used at all and it's like where you measure as a child we've been playing so much halo infinite we've been watching our little rank bars go up and andrew was just like, wouldn't this be great if instead of on here, it was on my doorframe? And I was like, what are you talking about? And he was equating it to when a kid gets taller and you measure the height on the wall. Well, because Gavin said I'm going up a bit,

and I thought of, oh, as a kid, it was exciting when you'd go up a new notch, and they'd put a new notch in the doorframe. If you could have a physical bar of light that showed your progress, it would be so great up and down, just like the nerves every time you go up. You go to use the bathroom,

you're looking at that fucking bar like, oh, fuck, I need to. Next game. Next game's a big one. Even though we haven't recorded in two weeks, Andrew and I have been spending a lot of time together playing a little bit of Halo Infinite. Oh, that's cool. You guys enjoying it?

Jeff, you haven't joined us. I haven't been invited. Oh. Yeah. That's how that dies. When you don't invite me, I don't join. Yeah. Not a big mystery on that one, guys. Yeah, but everyone's just on. Everyone's just playing. I'm on playing Halo. I've played a bunch. Nobody's

invited me. What rank are you? I'm only rank one. Yeah, rank one of what halo halo halo rank do you remember in halo 2 jeff how they had like symbols as the rank we're talking about that how like it was visually cool but like you'd encounter somebody who is the fucking moon like it would move on from numbers at a certain point it was just nonsensical vaguely yeah i remember the halo reach ranking better than any of the other ones i think what was that that was just the the military yeah i was just really it was very similar to actual military rank in a fun way for me so i remember like trying to level just because i was it was i don't know it was it was fun. Yeah. I've found, I don't know

if you've done the ranked games in Halo Infinite, but I've enjoyed it a lot more since becoming ranked and really focusing in on that. I'd recommend you put time. I have only played quick games, like quick play, whatever it is. You should do ranked. It's a lot of fun. Okay, I'll consider

it. We had a great comment from a comment lever recently that i saw because we had last week we were trying to discuss what someone who listens and doesn't leave a comment is called yeah jeff was saying like on levers and stuff there's someone uh on in a comment who whose name is i mean yolo right suggested regulation listeners i'm so glad you brought that up, Gavin. I saw that as well on Twitter and I thought that is

fucking perfect. Regulation listeners and comment leavers. Thank you for bringing that up. I completely and totally agree. Yeah, I think we're set. I don't even remember there being much of a debate. Comment leavers and regulation listeners. There you go.

Should we just sell both of those as an individual shirt and you can buy which one that you are? I really want to leave a comment, but I don't want to have to buy the shirt because I've already bought the regulation listener. It's a real problem. Maybe we could have like a trade-in program. Yeah.

Leave your first comment. Guys, I'm fucking out of it I'm sorry I'm so hungry and I'm so tired we should have done this on a different day probably it's my kind of rain I'll take I you know what I have multiple things I want to apologize for because we haven't recorded since the cosmic crisp review as little came in a little hot I was sick at that time, didn't realize it. I thought, just bad sleep.

I want to issue a proper, a formal apology to everybody. Oh. I don't think it was a trap. I appreciate it. As the, I think, I think you guys,

I think the Apple fell against, how do I not turn my apology into an insult? That's a great question. I don't think there's a great, I don't think the room was filled. Nick seemed very Apple qualified. I think the rest of the people in the process of the review seemed a little less Apple qualified, not their favorite fruit.

Kind of a strange, it would be like if I reviewed a banana. Not to that extreme. What are we qualified at? I would find as a regulation human, I assume, I would think, I would find your banana review to be just as valid as anyone else's. I may not agree with your

answer or result or your opinion, but I think the review is valid. Yeah, we don't want an echo chamber. All regulation humans should have equal review say. That's it's fair, but it's just I don't know if you're you're specializing in a specific thing for the majority of people to think that it can only be average at best. I feel like puts a ceiling on the extent of that review. Also, just the opinion of that person. And that makes sense.

Like, it's not a special nobody here i include myself i'm not an apple expert i enjoy apples the main point i wanted to apologize for is i said it was a trap i said you guys it felt like a bit a prank it's you guys didn't fail it was cosmic crisp they failed they failed me i reached out i sent messages no replies i tried my best to get their product it is not your guys's fault that i was not able to secure one it's cosmic crystal so i apologize for the heat i apologize for the declaration of revenge well i appreciate that i will then let me apologize andrew for something real fast uh because since that moment you know i do i'm on the cameo you

know i do some cameos from time to time uh-huh uh and since that moment every you know, I do, I'm on the cameo, you know, I do some cameos from time to time. And since that moment, every Canadian cameo I've gotten, of which there have been, you know, it's been a week, so there have probably been six or seven. I have potentially turned those cameos into questions about how the fuck apples work in Canada and why you weren't able to get one. And asking them if they could get Cosmic Crisps. So far, nobody's gotten back to me. I kind of turned it around on them and made them all put them to work. But I did maybe get a little spicy

talking about your inability to get an apple to other Canadians. So I apologize for that. Did you eventually get one, Andrew? No, I still haven't got one. I'm still looking. I'm still looking. I'm trying. I'm putting out feelers. Did you eventually get one, Andrew? No, I still haven't got one. I'm still looking. I'm still looking. I'm on them.

I'm trying. I'm putting out feelers. I'm going on websites. Gav, imagine being a guy who loves apples. Consider it not an expert, but certainly an apple enthusiast. Without a doubt. Who lives in a country where apples aren't readily available. That's got to be a hard life for you.

I got a lot of apples. I just don't got the Cosmic Crisp. I'm eating a Fuji right now. I got a Fuji on my desk. I got a mandarin orange on my desk. Is that from your private favorite apples list that you won't share? You know what?

I'm not saying it's on the list, but we're dabbling a little bit. If he's eating it at home, that's got to be top three. Oh, Eric and Nick, they're taking that as confirmation. There is very few apples I would refuse to just eat or that I wouldn't buy.

If I see an apple, if I'm walking by, I'll grab that apple. I'll grab it. If it's in a bag, I'll take it with me. I don't think there's any value to assuming that because I have it in my house means it is a top apple for me. It's a lot of good apples.

I don't understand why you would buy a non as such an enthusiast with such a refined apple palette. I don't know why you would buy a non top apple. Like, why would you own a non top apple in your house? Because if I if I'm just going by the fruit section, I maybe don't want to go into the heart of the jungle, Jeff. I maybe am on the perimeter and I'm like, you know what? Fuji isn't bad.

I'll grab a Fuji. Is it a bag? Grab this bag of Fuji's. So are you so is this a situation where you can only buy apples on in caps? Uh, not not like restricted to that. But yeah, sometimes, you know, like we've talked about before of not going down the aisle, just purchasing on the perimeter, on the edges edges of it sometimes you don't want to go into the heart of the fruit section it's big it's a vast section of you can get lost they got organic

products next thing you know you got a whole fucking shopping cart of apples you don't need that i would love to see you get lost in a fruit section. When I bought bananas, as I said, I felt very lost. I felt very confused. I didn't know if I needed a bag. I didn't know if I needed to write stuff down. There's a code to certain fruits that I am not aware of. Boy, we got dinged on codes. We made that dumb joke about how we had the serial numbers

from the stickers on the apple. Oh, yeah. Obviously, it's a PLU code. It says it on it. We were just being silly. And that one angered a few people who work at grocery stores for some reason. No, it's the batch. It was the batch number.

Jesus Christ. That was fun. I enjoyed doing that supplemental review as much as it didn't sound like I did at the time. I had a great time. And that's a little something for the audience if you're not aware, if you somehow missed it. We dropped, when the Apple dropped, a couple days after the Cosmic Crisp dropped, we dropped our review of it via the usual means, you know, the podcasting platforms and whatnot and YouTube.

But we didn't announce it ahead of time or anything. We just threw it out there. And it's not a full episode. It was just meant to be a review. Very angry, Andrew. Very interesting. I thought it was, that was a little different and a lot of fun. And I hope we do more stuff like that in the future.

There were, the one criticism of the thing, it was very different. It felt, being able to see made a big difference for me. I think that's why, beyond being sick, I think that influenced my anger.

Hearing you guys do a box opening and not being able to see the box or, like, review the thing, it was complicated. But you were angry after you were watching us. Nah, I was angry just in general, but it really, like, for you guys to be like, ooh, it's a box filled with apples and me just looking at a fucking Discord

screen of nothing. Well, that's how the audience feels. Yeah yeah but the audience isn't supposed to fucking comment on the box they're not adding to the recording oh they comment constantly buddy oh they they do we do have a comment section but you don't listen to a piece of audio expecting your comment to then impact the show that is currently happening sure sure i'll give you there's a difference i was supposed to be able to react to a thing but i will say apple's great i become a really big frozen raspberries guy i love a frozen raspberry i think we've talked about it before yeah you mentioned fantastic yeah i have i just take a photo uh well no i'm not just well i'm kind of doing both i get a glass

of water pour it in the well no i get a glass well i'm kind of doing both i get a glass of water pour it in the well no i get a glass first empty glass gotta fill it with raspberries i feel like half the glass with frozen raspberries then you put the water in it's great it's like ice you snack on it it's delicious i will take a photo wait that's it that's that's it all steps dad listen it's we like a simple recipe gavin you just get some frozen raspberries and throw it in a glass. And that to you is better than a room temperature normal raspberry. Absolutely. I think he realized his two-step process was too short,

so he added another step, and that was get a glass that's empty. No, no, no. The glass starts as empty. No empty no no this is you know what happened there i'll give you the fucking honest truth of where my brain went i thought about bathtubs okay and when i get in the tub i sit in an empty tub first then i put the water in i don't put the water in first you gotta put the raspberries in because you need to have enough raspberries if you put the water in first you're limiting the amount of raspberries you can put To the glass well what's stopping you from killing three birds with one stone take a bath throw a bag of frozen raspberries in and

Snack away, yeah, that's gross It's almost like romantic rose petals, but you know It's damn you fucking there's oh i'd vomit everywhere i don't want you keep your muffins on the box seat yeah no i don't i put them in a bowl and i i can't wait for you to visit here at one point and you're gonna sit in an empty tub and you're gonna be like you know what that's a fucking convenient table right there that is perfectly level i don't see how putting your headset on the crust zone of a toilet is cleaner than eating raspberries from water no water that you're in is the big like change like you're like water have a shower first then hop in now there's too

many steps what am i showering Is that step four step five? You just throw them in a glass throw them in a glass add water to the glass get a spoon What? What are you talking about? I don't fucking know it sounds like you're making raspberry You're countering that to my experience of having the raspberries in a glass You're saying that that is a better like that that would be the better move, and I'm saying there's too many steps. It's the biggest glass you could ask for. Yeah, I would like to point out that Eric,

I think very astutely wrote, the raspberries are Andrew and the cup is the bathtub. Yeah, it's terrible. Like nobody wants that. Like that's awful. So all the raspberries probably don't want to be in the cup then if you don't want to be in the bathtub. I really do not care about the feelings of the raspberries.

The raspberries considerations are at the bottom of my list. Here's what I see. I see dim, turn the lights off, light some candles, play some soft music, maybe one of your favorite football team fight songs. Then you sprinkle some raspberries, whatever you're listening to at the moment. State songs, whatever it is. Then you sprinkle some raspberries, dip into the tub,

and just relax. And then occasionally, when the mood strikes, just reach your little hand out, pluck a raspberry out of the water. Yum. Andrew's taking himself on a date. I don't know.

I don't like it. I'm not a fan of that. It seems gross. It seems disgusting. I'm fascinated by the line you draw between what's acceptable and what is gross. Because I feel like for me it's a nice straight line between all the normal gross shit and all the usual stuff. Yours is a bit of a wiggly one.

It sort of goes around into gross as acceptable and back out. And this is apparently... I don't... There are certain things that enter into just the purely gross category that you'd never do. And then there are things where, at the time, like, it's easy for me to say, now, I would not do that thing. I lost him.

I lost him. Yeah, he's gone. I just heard, dang. And then he went into the distance. He drifted away. Yeah, he's, yeah. He went down the drain of the bathtub. Oh, Eric, I'm sorry.

Jeff, have you shat yet? Today's the day, buddy. Now's the time to go shit. Nah, I'm okay at the moment. Are you sure you don't want to, like, push one out? No, there's no push it out. Oh, my God. It's more like just trying to hold it in.

There's no pushing. Yeah, that was probably on the day I shit my pants six times. It was just water. I mean, it is literally, if I recorded it, you wouldn't be able to tell the difference from me peeing and shitting. Wait, did I? Did I van? Yeah, you've been gone for a while.

Oh, I did a whole fucking, I did a whole thing. Oh, you should have done it for us. We would have loved it. I thought everyone was listening. I was, oh, where did I leave off? I said, Jeff is a shell of a man. And then there was no response. And I realized that I don't even think I leave off I said Jeff is a shell of a man and then there was no response and I realized that I don't even think I heard that part

yeah no we didn't hear but we you've been gone for about 45 seconds probably I did a whole fucking monologue about this thing and it was silent and I was like I don't know if this is going really well or if you guys are just listening I don't know how to feel about this and then there

was silence after i kind of threw a shot at jeff no response is like oh something is clearly broken and i came back to fucking jeff talking about shitting which funny enough is where i was leading anyway oh it's so it synced up i was very confused well do you want to go back and insult me where we where we can all hear it i was just saying that i think the gross line it can change based off of where you're where you're at if you're exhausted you're having a bad day maybe what would seem gross in an ideal scenario is acceptable at that time i see are you saying that you think that like potentially my view of the grossness of your raspberry romance bath is being, uh, affected by this.

My, my current situation. Like if I was a, if I was like a healthy, happy Jeff, I might, I might find it a little grosser. Exactly.

That's what I was saying. Where Jeff is like, you're not, you're not a hundred percent right now. I'm not even there's a thing. What percent are you? Uh, I'm going to,

so I came in thinking I was at like 85%. I felt pretty good about it. And then y'all got me immediately. And I realized I wasn't at 80%. I was at more like 40. this podcast is sponsored by better help online therapy the best way to think about therapy is through analogies that it's okay i know that sounds like school stuff smarts guy stuff but it's it's not let me explain we get our oil change for our car to prevent bigger issues down the road i don't know if you've ever had an engine seize up, but I have in an old pickup truck, piston seized.

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Buyraycon.com. Buy Raycon.com. Can I tell you a story of pain and misery that might bring you up a little bit? Please. My pain. My suffering. I'm laying in bed last night. Gavin and I played Halo. I'm crawling into bed.

It's like 11 p.m. Oh my god. I was up playing. I could have played Halo at 11 p.m. We should all play. You have my fucking phone number.m. Oh my God. I was up playing. I could have played Halo at 11 p.m. We should all play. You have my fucking phone number. You have my email address. You have my Xbox Live gamer tag.

You're just going to put the pool of people online though. You don't get people online. The pool of people online? I am so... I'm the other person in this podcast. You're appearing offline then. I didn't see you online. I would have definitely if I saw you online. I don't ever see't see you online. I would have definitely, if I saw you online. I don't ever see either of you

online. Are you guys appearing online? I'm definitely doing something. But what I was doing last night was I was in bed. That's what I thought. Everybody's appearing offline, but somehow I get left out. It's fine. I understand

my place in this podcast family. I am at the bottom of the pile i'm the one that you invite if nobody else is around andrew's too sick to play nick is taking care of the baby and eric's playing baseball maybe gavin will hit me up if he can be bothered to remember my fucking phone number i get it anyway andrew you were saying something gross so no it's not gross i was in bed, and you know when you have those, I don't know, I feel like this is relatable, where you're in bed, you're comfy, but you kind of have a thought of like, oh, what if I go down and do this instead?

What if I get a snack? What if I get a drink of something? Yeah. But I'm so cozy, and you have that real struggle, and I was like, you know what? We're getting into the winter season, my favorite time of year. Yeah, you're battling the cozy wall. Some hot chocolate right now would be fucking delicious.

What a like just a nice little cup of hot cocoa. Oh, man. What a time I was laying there. I thought I had this fight in my head for 25 minutes. Do I get up? I'm so comfy. Do I get hot chocolate? I decide I'm going to go get some hot chocolate. So I go down. I get the milk going. It's nice and warm. I'm so comfy do I get hot chocolate I decide I'm gonna go get some hot chocolate so I

go down I get the milk going it's nice and warm I'm doing it all fancy I got the marshmallows out are you doing it in a pan I'm doing it I'm doing it in a pot I'm doing it I'm like taking my time I'm enjoying the experience I got my cow is in the cupboard I got my the kettle is there's so many people that want to fight me that that is a kettle it's the most ridiculous having to send product links but anyway the thing is being made it's delicious i got my tablet and one hand whipped cream marshmallow it's hot it's oh it's fantastic i turn around i take four steps i drop my tablet hit my forearm shift my forearm spill hot chocolate everywhere largely on myself burn my shoulder

just scorch my shoulder with hot milk I got whipped cream on the ceiling I got marshmallows on a pantry door how did it get so much velocity it flew everywhere I don't know Gavin how it got so much velocity but it went fucking everywhere

because as i've just learned you've got high ceilings i do i do have high ceiling it fucking flew it flew everywhere i burnt myself the speaker on my tablet no longer works i broke that in the hot chocolate i had to clean everything up i immediately my shirt still in the kitchen it's just there. I took the shirt off. It was covered in hot chocolate. Miserable. It was miserable.

It was one of the worst hot chocolate experiences I've ever had. I cleaned everything up. I had a quarter of a cup left. I shot some whipped cream in there, and I just sat downstairs and watched Seinfeld sad, eating the remains of my hot chocolate. It was terrible.

It was a miserable experience. You didn't bother making a night, after all that effort, you didn't just make a new one? No! I was broken. I was a broken man, Gavin. I had a burnt shoulder.

I was picking marshmallows up off the floor. Having to put stuff in the garbage that you know is delicious is always crushing. I'm just sitting in the dark watching Seinfeld at 1 a.m. Miserable. And this is after we played Halo?

This is after. Yeah, this is like maybe 40 minutes after. My whole evening was ruined. I should have just stayed in bed. That's all I kept thinking about. I should have just stayed in bed. I stayed in bed and I got no whipped cream on any ceiling. Fucking, oh, it's the worst.

It's terrible. It was, I've had a bad run. Well, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that happened to you man I feel like burning the shoulder only is a rare one like I could maybe it would get up to the shoulder if you like But you're a whole your whole arm It only burnt a corner of my shoulder and I luckily avoided the cat that is like the biggest thing that I don't know how the Cat didn't get hit by any of it voided them sam sam yeah do you know that you're aware of this cat 20 years old it's yes she is it's it's been i don't know it was a rough night in that regard i'm just spilling shit all over the place i i've become

a maple syrup guy it's a big addition in my life really gotten into maple syrup recently i was making some pancakes took them upstairs put i was carrying a lot of stuff i think my issue is i'm carrying too many things at once well yeah you've always got a tablet in your hands i had like six different things in my hands and i'm gonna sit at my desk to eat my pancakes with a lot of maple syrup and i put the plate on the bed for a minute and then I think oh fuck there's so much maple syrup on that and I quickly grab it luckily didn't come off

I was like oh that could have been really bad so I continue with the rest of my night crawl in the bed ready to sleep pull up the first blanket it's drenched in maple syrup just coated in it and I was like, oh, fuck. It's one, like, I just want to go to bed.

Fuck. See, that's where our lines between acceptable and gross differ. Because I don't want to put food in my bed. I don't want food anywhere near the bed. It was just there for a moment. I put the plate down for a second because I had so many things in my hand to adjust to put other stuff on the desk then i immediately grabbed the food from the bed it was just at an angle the plate was at an angle and all the maple syrup poured off the pancakes onto the blanket so you were

sticky it was all sticky both blankets were i threw that off i was like well at least i have another oh no this one's also fucking covered in maple syrup that's just coated in it my whole arm everything terrible that's i maybe how did it get on the other blanket it's so viscous i wouldn't imagine it would go through quickly i think it just hit double coverage i think it hit both of them at the same time and i didn't see it there's a lot of maple syrup on my plate and i think it just slid off and coated two different blankets. I can never get maple syrup right. I feel like I'm putting too much on. And then I go to eat the pancakes. And suddenly it's all absorbed.

And I'm like, where the hell did all the maple syrup go? I can't even taste it. And I put more. It's really hot. It's a surprisingly difficult condiment to get right, I feel like. Really? I put zero thought into. You just drown it.

Well, I'm not necessarily drowning it but i've never been like oh that's too much or too little it's like that's just i have maple syrup that's interesting i've never even considered the possibility of like loading too much on it are you working on your pancake mix that you ordered is that where you get pancakes yeah i'm still no i'm still going through my 70 pounds i don't think i finished a 10 pound bag of it. I'm still working through it. I totally forgot about that 70 pounds. Isn't it close to expiring? I think it expires in 2023.

I think I got some time. I think I'm good. But yeah, I've been working away. I'm almost done my first 10 pound bag. I'll gladly make you pancakes if you guys ever come over. I'm so excited to come over. Yeah, you can eat them in the tub and you'll see. Let's be sure to make it, when we do that, an official face event so I get the invite too.

Oh, you're always invited, Jeff. Am I? Was I invited to Halo for the last week? I had an interesting thought while I was listening to all these stories and I was thinking, I was thinking about a fun bit we could do, would be I could put out like a request and try to find some new or real friends who actually like me and want to spend time with me. I texted you guys

at 10 o'clock this morning, you, Eric, and Gavin, once again nobody responded to me. It's becoming very clear to me. It wasn't a to me it wasn't a question it was a conversation starter do you ever text me

if you send a text saying today is going to be interesting on the day we record the podcast well I think it is hell yeah can't wait that was my reaction too I thought that that was like a ooh exciting save it for the show type thing.

And you thought, hell yeah. I'm shitting my brain. Fuck him. And he doesn't deserve a reply. I was trying to start a conversation with you guys. My point being, it's very, very, and it's okay. It's okay because it's a day job. We all got to make our paychecks.

I get it. We have great on-screen chemistry. But I think a fun bit, I didn't have this in my notes because I just came up with this right now. But I think a fun, cool thing we could do is maybe I could put out a call to the comment leavers and the regulation listeners that like, hey,

I might want to play Halo with friends. I might want to text with people back and forth and have them respond to me within three or four days, like the last time I brought it up. Maybe there's some people out there who may not think, maybe think that there's some value

in old Jeff as a friend and may just want to have a conversation with me. If you're out there, let me know on Twitter or something. I'm currently in the market for at least two friends. I love having conversations with Jeff. I'm so lonely, and I don't have any friends to talk to. So audience, hit me up. You talk daily.

What do you mean? I don't feel like today is going to be interesting. G is what you texted the group text. I read that, Jeff, with excitement, thinking, oh, I don't want to ask about it in the text because I don't want to ruin what will happen on the show. There's a huge risk

with responding to the group chat. We could easily blow all of our reactions to something good. It's a massive risk, and I can't believe you're acting like it isn't. Let's see. It's a huge risk. The last time, we'll go back through our text a little bit. Uh, cause Gavin and I talk daily.

Uh, on Saturday I texted Gavin and I said, uh, Hey, text me back. Eventually you did. Uh, and then I,

we, we talked about some stuff eventually. Then, uh, then Sunday, November 7th, which would have, this is the, the uh i sent you a video and i said have you seen this and you said yeah back eventually i text you back you text me at 9 24

a.m i replied at 10 06 that's not eventually no that's fine that's pretty good then the next time we talked on our daily talk was sunday november 7th i sent you a video and i said have you seen this and then you said yeah and then i sent you a a video on Sunday or I sent you a text on the Sunday to ask how you were feeling. And then you responded, but at no point in any of, oh, and then I said, uh, again, I sent you another text to see how you were feeling. Uh, and, uh, at no point in any of these conversations, did you reach out to me first? This is only me reaching out desperate for a friend, getting one or two word answers and then moving on with my life and then trying to get a week later i i'm can't repeat that that we're talking about text messages this

is awful we were on the podcast on monday well that was another day we didn't need to text i've been seeing so much of you yeah okay well great happy to do more as always I feel like if you if you're teeing up some good face stuff the best thing to do is just to wait to hear it I think that was the misunderstanding in that text

Jeff I think clearly it was about the colonoscopy that you're going through it was I was trying to talk to you guys about my thing and then just nobody seemed interested in responding to me so I thought, oh, well, I'm not going to burden them

with my problems because they can't even be bothered to respond to me. I was also at work. I was in the middle of a Let's Play. I'm not going to, you know, I'm about to come out.

I arrived home late like five minutes after we started because I didn't have any time. I haven't even eaten yet. There's all these demands. It's not a demand. It was like five hours ago. Four hours ago I sent that text. I was any time. I haven't even eaten yet. There's all these demands. It's not a demand. It was like five hours ago.

Four hours ago I sent that text. I was at work. I was in the video that you didn't go to. We could, to be just completely honest, we could have recorded 10 hours from now. I still wouldn't have responded because I thought it was show related. I thought it was like,

ooh, exciting thing for the show. All right, that's fine. It doesn't have to be a question for me. I thought it was like exciting thing for the show. Alright, that's fine. It doesn't have to be. Well, I rescind everything I've said then. You guys are the best. I look forward to playing Halo with you constantly. It sounds like we do it all the time. I'd look, you know what I look forward to? Somebody texting me first one day. I texted

you yesterday. You texted me first yesterday and then started a conversation with me and then disappeared. And then when I said, hey, what's up, man? Are you going to tell me that thing? You said, oh, never mind. I had the conversation with Gavin. I don't want to have it with you again.

We need to talk. So this was massive texting. I'll fucking read it. No, please do. Because this is a whole this. You have no idea how bad I felt. I felt bad on so many levels. And this has happened before but it's the

first time i've been trapped you texted me out of the blue uh which i appreciated it was the and you said i have an idea and i said go on and then uh i didn't hear from you for i don't know three minutes and then you responded to me and you said i hate myself and then you said i told it all to gavin and i said okay should i go and I was like okay so should I ask Gavin for the information then and you go no just I'm not gonna tell you just save it for the show we can have Gavin explain even when you're texting me even when you're trying

to have a conversation with me you're not you're doing it with someone else you're doing it with Gavin let's just cut me out of the conversation completely absolutely not let's just I want you to hear my position on this my perspective i texted you that thing and i was so excited to talk to you about it jeff like genuinely i was like oh i can't wait to talk to jeff here's opinion i value it he's so funny he's a creative

guy i can't wait this is gonna be so wonderful i text you you reply i had gotten a text from gavin earlier in the day. You're both Gs on my phone. You both have the same icon because of that, like the default G Google thing. I accidentally then click Gavin and I sent like seven or eight texts explaining and outlining this idea with a link.

And then I realized, oh, fuck. This is, I said all these to Gavin too hard to copy and paste back to me well because I thought it'd be funnier on the show to have Gavin then explain to you my idea but Gavin what could you explain to me Andrew's idea I've been on I've been waiting for days to hear it from what I've seen you watch 10 hours betty white and you get paid a grand or something so the idea was we've talked about before on the show budget port-a-potty budget dumb budget we need a budget i came across this absurd this absurd contest if you want to call it

that it's like betty white is in no way affiliated with it or to call it that it's like Betty white is in no way affiliated with it or endorsed by it, but it's this insurance company that is like, Hey, if you can prove you're the biggest Betty white fan, we will give you a thousand dollars at a DVD player and some DVDs. And you have to document yourself watching 10 hours of Betty white. And that's the contest you're being

the contest is them trying to find the biggest betty white fan to then have social media like document their experience of watching this content i don't think anyone's gonna fucking enter that thing and i feel like we could just take over random contests and win them and that is how we could fund this show we just need to win these things. I also thought it'd be really funny if on our YouTube channel, just a random video out of nowhere comes out of one of us talking about how much they love Betty White and why she's so great. And then so like,

there's a week where the audience will be like, what is, why is Jeff or whatever talking about Betty White with like no context. So we'd have to do is make that before this comes out. All we would have to do is before the contest ends on the 22nd for submission. So the audience in no way can impact this in any way. They can't apply. They will hear after the fact.

And I don't think anyone will apply. So I think if we apply and include a video of the application, I think we might be able to win the Betty White Dream Job Contest. I sounds awesome to me. I like the idea of entering random contests that nobody else enters and wins. I know we know somebody associated with Rooster Teeth who used to do that and had a lot of success with it. I remember I listened to a like a game podcast and they talked about how running like a gaming website in the mid-2000s they used to have these huge contests where it was like if you could submit in the greatest like psp guide or whatever for this thing you will win a car through this promo that they're doing and nobody had the ability to capture footage at that point

or like just the the barriers the entry were so hard they'd have like four people enter for a new car and it was just like a constant thing where it's like it was such a small thing i think if we target these weird bizarre contests we could just rack up the wits i'm just so confused at this contest like everyone applies and if you're like and then they select only one person yes watch 10 hours from like various pre-provided dvds and then you get a grand so they all they get out of this is one person doing like a bit of social media about betty white yeah but what i really love is when you read the details of the contest there's a very clear line that betty white has no affiliation or support of this she in no way endorses this in

any way. I don't know how they came to the decision of doing this Betty White thing, but I don't think anyone will enter. And I think we could take it over. And even if we don't get selected, I think we could hijack the Betty White thing. If they've got like a hashtag or whatever,

we could just take over the hashtag. I feel like I could easily watch 10 hours of Golden Girls. That's some good shit. Is that your favorite Betty White content? That's the only Betty White I've seen. What's better than Golden Girls? This is one of the best shows of all time. Lake Placid.

Great. That's a good movie, but what are you going to watch Lake Placid six times? I could easily watch Lake Placid six times. She's feeding the fucking thing. Well, dude, don't spoil the fucking movie for people who haven't seen it. Oh, I'm sorry. You haven't had time to spoil the fucking movie for people who haven't seen it oh i'm sorry you haven't had time no yeah fucking placid lake placid is is a very good movie it's also got uh what's his face in it um oliver is oliver platt oliver platt and that yeah yeah he's great in it

yeah i don't know if it's an intentional and it must be the like the greatest gag in that movie is they keep some one of the characters keeps falling into traps set for the crocodile or whatever alligator what is it is it crocodile or alligator i never know i always confuse that it's probably an alligator because i think it's freshwater yeah because it's lake placid people always try to figure out if it's an alligator or a crocodile in what situation does it ever matter that's a great point too gav crocodiles are bigger than alligators. That's the only difference. I mean, they'll both rip your arm off.

Yeah, I think they, yeah. I feel like Jeopardy would matter. Trivia shows. Side of that. I guess if Mayim Balik is asking you, it matters. Could we sign up for this? Could we just enter the bed light? Do it, dude.

Who's stopping us? I can't do it because it has to be a U.S. It has to be somebody in the U.S. I'm blocked. We'll talk to our producer, Eric. He'll do it. Eric, are you going to sign up for us or are you going to be our Betty White ambassador?

No, Nick can do it. He's not busy. Oh, there you go. Yeah. You think you're more busy than Nick? Yeah. Immediately mute. Nick says, are you sure?

Well, wait a second. Everyone was just talking about the joy of being able to spend 10 hours watching Betty White, and then when it comes time to sign up, everyone's suddenly busy. I'll watch Betty White. I'll watch the Betty White. I just don't think I can pull off a good video explaining why I love Betty White. Okay, I'll fill out the form on your behalf, Jeff. Is that okay?

So I don't understand. Like, your grand vision here is for me to enter a contest for you to win? For us to win? No, the show. We spend the money on the budget for the show. This is how we get in the contest we enter in the contest and then you spend the money that we win that you don't where you don't

know we all it becomes the community pool this is a port of view it this way we're winning a port-a-potty essentially is the prize of this great because we don't ever get given money for anything and all of the sales money for the billion ad reads on these videos and an audio files don't come to us either. They all go in the pocket of sales. This could be, it's all going to be contest winning budget. This is interesting. This is, that's a really good way to look at it, Gav. Yeah.

What could we do with $1,000 after taxes? Exactly. What could we do with $1,000 after taxes? Exactly. What can we do with $700? It's prize winning, so it's probably taxed to the moon. What can we do with $630? This is just the start, okay? We start cleaning up.

We start putting all these... No, I'm thinking like we could buy a surfboard. I bought a surfboard once for 600 bucks. Really? They probably cost about that. We could buy a surfboard. I'm not trying to be a dickhead here. I'm thinking we could buy a surfboard. I bought a surfboard once for $600. Really? They probably cost about that. We could buy a surfboard. I'm not trying to be a dickhead here. I'm being serious.

I'm trying to think of what we could spend $600, $700 on. There's a lot. You could repair your bike? I don't want to talk about it. Oh. I don't want to open up that whole can of worms. I got bike problems, man. Jet ski rental, that's $300.

$600 would be two jet skis for three hours. Right? We could do that. That'd be pretty good. That'd be pretty good. Or three jet skis for two hours. That might be even better. Oh yeah, then Andrew

could have his own. Absolutely. Ooh. I like this plan. I see we don't want to share with you. This could fund the joust. That's what I'm saying. That's a great idea, Nick.

Betty White's joust fund. We have to call it the regulation Betty White joust fund. Something along those lines. If we can, I will recant now and say, I don't like the idea of the joust, but if the Betty White contest does fund it, then I'm on board and will do whatever it takes in order to win this money.

I just love the idea of this company sending the check. The Betty White joust fund at F*** Face. A subsidiary of Unifor. Well, technically it's a subsidiary of Fluke face which is an arm oh sorry uniform uniform combining the power of one with that we're gonna form uniform so now we just need uh we need a video jeff explaining why betty white is so great we can we can do that but we need to watch the 10 hours of content first i was gonna say no no but we don't get no no no oh right watch it we yeah but don't you don't you need to watch some content

to remind yourself of how great Betty White is? No. You think you're just going to spit hot Betty White takes from the hip without, like, re-familiarizing yourself with any of her content? You're going to have to dip your toe into Betty White a little bit before you make the video. I'm not sure about that.

I don't know i mean if only to watch your favorite scene of lake placid so you can quote a moment you don't want to sound like your idea all right your idea is very sound and very good and even though i am operating at about a four i think i'm down to about 36 right now uh and just loopy as fuck. Even at this diminished capacity, I can see the potential. I think it's a fantastic idea. But I think if you want to, like, I do think we should enter this. I do think we should try to win.

I do think there won't be a ton of people. I also don't think it'll be a walk through the park. I do think other people will, and we'll have to put some level of effort in. And I think that we're going to have to come across as actual Betty White fans or I agree with all that. Okay. I mean, could we all dress

up as the Golden Girls? That's an idea. See that's thinking outside the box that does. I don't know how there's no way I could submit that in the I want to be Sophia. What if we dress up instead? Well, you know, we can dress up as our favorite Golden Girls, but then it's about more than Betty. What know we can dress up as our favorite Golden Girls but then it's about more than Betty what if we all dress up as our favorite Betty White

from her career like Gavin you could be Rose Nylund right and Andrew you could be the crocodile or the alligator or Betty White from Lake Placid and I'll pick up Betty White from some other like what is it it's

it's what is that? It's all... What is that show she had? It's like Hot and... Oh, Hot and Cleveland? Hot and Cleveland. Never seen it, but I'll familiarize myself with Hot and Cleveland and I'll be that Betty White character. I love this. I'm glad that there's support. I wish that I would have texted the right person

the entire way through yesterday. Maybe I'll hold up a collection of things that Betty White is older than, such as the ballpoint pen. That's... I don't understand. Dagger. What else came out?

No, that's a great thing. No, here's your take on this. Electric can opener. Betty White... Here's your thing right now. Betty White... Country music. Betty White is such an institutional,

like such a a national uh uh what's the word I'm looking for here uh treasure a national treasure she should be when she dies there should be uh she she should be interned in the Smithsonian her career has she is still at the top of her game at 90 x years old right and she her career has spanned so much time. She has been a famous, she had been entertaining millions of audience members since before the electric can opener since before the ballpoint pen. These are great ways to show not only the longevity of her brilliant career, but our knowledge of it.

This is what's going to win us the contest. Shit like that. Gavin, that's smart. it. This is what's going to win us the contest. Shit like that, Gavin. That's smart. Dude, number one, sliced bread. She's older than sliced bread. That means sliced bread is the best thing since Betty White. Sliced bread is the best thing since Betty White. That's a t-shirt.

Other people must have made that observation. Why are we not mentioning the high five? And we're just talking about things. She's older than, she's way older than I am. Jeff's older than the high five, according to your bullshit. Yeah, it's not my bullshit. It's just a historic fact. You don't know about history?

Coming at Dusty Baker? He didn't know what to do, Gavin. Can you imagine the pressure of seeing a hand and not knowing what to do with it? Your product didn't exist yet. Oh, speaking of things that Betty White is older than, if we ever, this is the problem with like, not all of the content that I have, we haven't touched anything on my list,

nor do I think we will, but a lot of it isn't evergreen. And one of those things is, Andrew, your fucking nugget challenge. I pulled some stats. I don't know if they're relevant anymore, but I pulled some stats of like all time. Oh, my God. You OK? I how do I undo?

I just did all of my notes what in the fuck are you on your phone okay I got it back okay that was weird I just deleted face by accident I did yeah I wanted to list uh well like I said guys diminished capacity and and I'll let's be honest you've known me for a long time my capacity hasn't been minished I wanted to list, like I said, guys, diminished capacity.

Let's be honest. You've known me for a long time. My capacity hasn't been minished. At my best, I'm never very minish. We want to look at best performances of all time. Obviously, Wilt Chamberlain has the highest scoring game of all time. He scored 100 points in 1961 versus the Knicks. The second highest points total by NBA players, Kobe Bryant with 81. Then we have some other people.

I'd never heard of David Thompson. He was a Denver Nugget, though, and he scored 73 points. Although, I'm not sure if that's correct because that's different on my other list. Anyway, so, but that puts you in the same category as Michael Jordan. His career high is 69. Pistol Pete Maravich, 68. Devin Booker had that terrible game with 70 against the Celtics.

Nobody wants to remember that. Anyway, and then a bunch of Wilt Chamberlain doing it over and over and over and over again. But you scored what? 62 was where you were, Gav? No, was I? I think I was like 57. No, you scored what? 62 was where you were, Gav? No, was I? I think I was like 57.

No, you were in the 60s. You were in the 60s. I was in the 60s? It was 62 or 67. Okay. I've kind of blocked that whole thing from my memory. Anyway, you have scored more points in your one NBA game than Stephen Curry,

whose career high is only 62. Carmelo Anthony, career high is only 62. Carmelo Anthony, career high is only 62. The great Tracy McGrady, only 62. Damian Lillard has only scored 61 points in his career.

James Harden has only scored 61 points in his career. Did it twice, though. LeBron James, highest scoring game of his NBA career, 61 points. Those are all people you bested in your

first and only NBA game that is so Eric is right that is rarefied air is that I am more qualified than LeBron James to make another Space Jam movie if they make a Space Jam 3 my credentials are more deserving than whatever he's done. They're definitely up there. I mean, to say that's an impressive list is an understatement. Not only that, oh, this might be where I saw it. According to the internet, the highest

scoring regular season game by a Denver Nugget was Kiki Vanderwey. He scored 51 points. So, you've kicked the shit out of it. The Nuggets and the history of their franchise have nobody that they can put up against you.

Eric just said Andrew's a hell of an athlete. You guys haven't even seen me do the sewing machine yet. That's really gonna blow some minds. That's gonna turn some heads. Well, I don't know. I don't know if you're a hell of an athlete, but you're a hell of an eat fleet. I'm telling you, the sewing machine. Which is a word I hope I just made up eat fleet eat fleet eat fleet but i don't i feel like i'm a terrible athlete why why do you think you're a terrible athlete because going against any of

the people that are athletes you know like a joey chestnut a kobayashi whatever i got no chance but i feel like going against athletes and the athletic world, my numbers are pretty good. I feel like I have to stay in the athlete territory. The moment I go in the athlete, I'm at the bottom of the pile. Dude, Devin Booker, to my knowledge, Devin Booker is the only player playing in the NBA right now who has outscored you. That's fucking crazy.

How many did he get? How many did he get? He got 70 against the Celtics like three years ago. I can fucking, I'll fucking destroy De devin booker i'll take him out but can you though because you stopped you shy of that yeah but there's a difference when mentally when you're trying to eat 120 nuggets as opposed to 71 that's a big gap that's a big difference i could definitely use 71 i can make that work and we're not doing this for a while this is going to be months from now i need to get back into nugget shape nugget

form nugget mentality i need to work my way back it takes a lot to do these and what what kind of things will you be doing to prepare absolutely nothing it's just more of a time and forgetting how bad a reset yeah just like once enough time passes where I fully forget everything and then there will be an evening where I'm like, fucking Devin Booker's going down. I'm gonna wake up at 4am one day and just say Devin Booker's time is over.

I am dethroning Devin Booker. Yeah, you gotta wait for the nugget confidence to hit you. I understand that. Yeah. You'll be cozy in bed and then you'll think now's the time. Should I get up and do nuggets? Oh, man. I'm throwing nuggets

all over myself. Do you know Eric's letting us giving us the wrap-up sign and we got to because we got to record another one. I'll be honest with you. I didn't know if I was going to

make it to the next one, but the last five minutes I've started to feel a little better. So maybe I can. I do want to let you guys know on something that we missed this week that I think could have been spectacular.

But Eric shot it down tomorrow as we as we know, I'm getting my colonoscopy to get my colonoscopy. If you've never gotten one, it's not a fun process. You can't eat for a bunch of days. You get on a liquid diet. You have to drink a bunch of weird shit that tastes gross that makes you shit and puke constantly. I have to drink like after we're done. I have to go drink 46 ounces of weird shit that tastes gross that makes you shit and puke constantly i have to drink like after we're done i have to go drink 46 ounces of liquid in like an hour is that just so they meet no resistance on the way up well you have to rest your colon so you can't have any food go through uh that could agitate it or fill it up in my in my case i you know i have diverticulosis

so i have those little pockets all over so you you've got to flush out your system, kind of shock it out, and then you have to keep it clean and clear, because even colored food, anything with a dye, like red Gatorade, can look like blood to a camera. It's not a fun process. And then they make you take a bunch of special liquids that extra clear you out. You've never taken a laxative like you've taken when you go for a colonoscopy.

Anyway, it's like Nick says awful. Like he's I'm assuming Nick has had a colonoscopy before. I have as well. This is my second. So it's not my first rodeo. I kind of know what to expect. But I thought it would be great. We need to do a break shit. I wanted to do it tomorrow after the colonoscopy.

I wanted to go from the hospital to the break shit all looped up on the casino. They put, they knock me out, right? Like they give you drugs. I'm all loopy. I'm all fucking dumb.

I'll be, it's like a truth serum. I won't be able to, like I would have just been wackadoo for hours. And Eric was like, absolutely not. I was ready to do it. He said it right there. There is, him i won't be able to like i would have just been wackadoo for hours and eric was like absolutely not i was ready to do it he said right there there is no way that i'm going to put jeff

on camera after an outpatient surgery they already did it well 10 years ago i did it. Well, 10 years ago. I did it 10 years ago. I am not doing that. I am not doing that. That's, no, we're not doing it tomorrow after he gets all the stuff inside of him and then it's, no. No, absolutely not. No, no. Jeff carries that show and goes like,

here's interesting facts about the cards. I don't even know what it would be. I don't either. what it would be. I don't either. That's what would be so much fun. Pack a card and put a dollop of drool ends on it. Yeah, 100%. I have no idea. What facts would I come up with

fucking blitzed out of my mind on hospital drugs? I have no idea. It would have been so much fun. But I respect that Eric, ultimately I think Eric's looking out for me and I think he's maybe not necessarily looking out for the show. Because I think it would be great for the show. But I do appreciate Eric looking out for me.

But I also would love to have done it. Insane. That would have been great. Insane. You know, show must go on and all. It does. Should we talk about the jet ski stuff? The big merch?

Have we talked about that already? I don't think we have. Why don't you cover that, and then we'll wrap this up. Okay. Well, I mean, I feel like it's really, as the big jet ski guy, I was excited to share with you. Did you see? I'd be shocked if you did.

This is a big week for jet ski news. This is a great jet ski week. Is it? It's a good story. There's a big story. I'll drop in the chat. There's flooding in BC right now. Farmers hopped on some jet skis, saved cows oh my god wait how do you say how do you get a cow on a jet ski did they tell you they didn't put the cow no they they were like guiding

them using the jet skis like they were yeah they were herding them they were sheep yeah we when we go jet skiing we should play a game of chase where one of us is dressed up as a sheep and the other is dressed as a cow i mean jeff did something similar instead of a cow though it was a dead bloated deer that's so gross it was a great week for jet skis and we have jet ski merch coming out on November 29th. Yeah. I believe. Celebrate the cows

by jet ski merchandise from face on where to fucking go on November 29th at 10 a.m. Central Standard Time Cyber Monday.

Fill up your your cyber coffers with jet ski related merchandise and and uh and uh pay homage to those brave farmers in canada who saved those cows with the power of jet yes that is exactly why we're doing jet ski merch it is to honor the canadian farmers yes there's no history or appreciation for jet skis on this show i still haven. I still haven't been on a jet ski. That is a moment

I'm excited to experience. I'm ready for my life to change. Do you think you'll go 60 miles an hour? I think I will probably have an experience like you did where I will be just doing little speed, just little crawling almost across the water and then I'll get

into it and we'll be flying. In other merch news, scrumping is dead, apparently, according to the merch channel. It is. All the scrumping signs, no scrumping signs are sold out. Yeah, they were like, fucking gone. See ya. So I guess that's it for that.

They were made out of plastic. I was imagining a nice, solid metal sign. Was it a plastic sign? plastic i was imagining a nice solid metal sign was it a plastic sign which originally greatly disappointed me because i never actually touched one but then i just thought well that's that's definitely face well you know i see what you're saying in my head it was like one of those metal signs you would see like posted next to a farm or whatever on the side of the road but i i did go to lowe's the other day and i did look at some signs like no soliciting signs and most of them were were the same material as the as the scrumping sign so i

think it might be a situation where the industry has moved on in our in our heads that's very fair i cannot remember the last time i went sign buying so i can't say that um i'm really regularly in the market and know what the the typical experience is the plastic sign is pretty pretty uh pretty commonplace these days okay it's good today the the that's never mind never mind that being said i i hope you got one because i don't think we're making any more. I think this was a special thing. So for all you that didn't get it, I just pray for your apples. What if we brought back all of our limited items

for RTX next time we do it? Like unlimited RTX? Yeah, like if... Wait, what? Because they're unlimited for RTX if we bring them all back. Like we're unlimiting. It'd be re-limited, but at RTX. Still limited.

So, are you asking, should we just make all of our collectible items no longer collectible at RTX? Is that what you're presenting? Yeah, we're unlimiting it. I don't know. I just worry about our ability to let people know that merch is coming out,

and by the time we've mentioned it, it's already out. We just did a great job. We let people know about the farmers and the jet skis and we're doing great. Let's just be better. The scrumping signs were long out before we mentioned it. That is true. We could have handled the scrumping thing better.

We are victims of our own recording schedule more than anything. And your colon. And Andrew's illness. Yeah, I mean, we've all had to cancel. How big is a sack? Would you say? How many apples do you think should fit in a sack?

If you're going to what's the minimum for 40? OK, we're on the sack. A sack is is is probably the biggest size that you can sling over your shoulder and still carry around without being weighed down. I agree. I think sack. I think like Santa claus i think of a giant bag i have a bag with swag written on it i have in my head and and i'll be honest with you because i can't tell i got you know this is and eric will end but i'm we'll wrap it up with this in the notes that i never got to of the 4 000 things to talk about uh a lot of them are apple related if i'm being honest with you and i it's it's given me pause

and i want to ask before we go down this road are we nearing the end of our apple related content or do we continue down this road because i was going to build a prototype for an unscrumpable uh like lockable apple sack that you could string over your shoulder that holds one apple with a strap, and then it's locked in some way, so it's like an unscrumpable apple you bring on the go with you.

And I say apple sack just because apple sack sounds good, but it would only hold one. It doesn't hold four. To be honest, that's incredible, because my next prototype, I was going to invent the apple pocket. What is? After the grief I got last week about no one storing an apple in their pocket.

I'm going to make a dedicated pocket. I love it. I love it. This is. I love it. We're sticking with apples, baby. I love it. I can't wait.

Let's end this podcast so we can talk more about apples. Oh, I can't wait. I just like this. This is like phase two of the FCU is the apple phase. We've already gone through. The FCU. We're done with baseball.

That was phase one. No. Baseball will come back. You can't give up on Zimmer. Oh, God. He was introduced in phase one, but he is obviously going to be... No more things.

We got to stop. Because I want to talk to you guys about Zimmer. Love you guys. Hey, if you ever find yourself... I feel a little better now. If you ever find yourself thinking, I haven't talked to Jeff in a year. I've ignored him and I've never played video games with him.

Maybe give him a ring. He's not doing anything, I promise. Thanks for listening to F*** Face. We've only played twice! Goodbye!