F**kface - Regulation Takes 3

Episode Date: November 23, 2025

A single round of takes for Gavin, Andrew, Nick, and Eric because they get INTO it. Is military time really military time? What was Gavin's point anyway? Support us directly at https://www.patreon.com/TheRegulationPod Stay up to date, get exclusive supplemental content, and connect with other Regulation Listeners. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Guys, you ready to give some spirited takes? Multitasking. Is this Advent Takes or normal takes? No, normal takes. This is just a normal-ass episode of takes. We've already recorded a holiday takes. I don't think you're part of that, Gavin. Well, that would explain that. They would. Does anyone want to start? Does anyone feel like they've got a strong opening take that they would like the lead with? Okay, that's a clear no, no, no, that is a universal cross-the-board. No, no, no, I got it, I got it, I got it.

Are you sure? Because I got a take that I think Nick's going to like. I got one just because Gavin asked if this was Advent or holiday or anything or whatever. This, again, these are evergreen takes. These are takes that aren't for the holidays, but this one is, this one is holiday. themed um and that is the holiday theming for most things sucks i i hate holiday discord fucking cut it out stop making it the default allow me to opt in if that's the way to do it but don't put me in spooky unmute mode where every time i hit a goddamn button on the software i already hate

it's making noises at me i i hate it it is true truly like the holiday theming, not just of like this software, but like sort of in, when a podcast is like a holiday themed episode and stuff like that, it is, I think, never better than just the thing that I was going to get otherwise. The theming on most holiday stuff is a very plastic like cellophane wrap over something that just doesn't do anything for me. it was always for me a struggle with like the rooster teeth podcast where it's like well what are we doing for the holiday theme and it's like i don't who what are you talking about who cares i hate it tree on the set yeah yes it was like a lot of that and then that was like as far as it's like that's as far as a lot of that stuff goes and and i just don't like

theming for software i don't like theming for shows i don't like holiday theming for like a lot of this stuff it's just not it's not it's never better it's never better i don't like it i strongly disagree with half of that. I'm with you on the Discord. I'm with you on like tech theming. I love like a TV show holiday special. I'm a big fan of the seasonal themes. I like a little bit of a different and unique spice.

A tree house of horrors is maybe the shining example of what that can be. I think those are fun. I think that's a great exception to the rule. I'm trying to think. What other? I feel like the office Christmas special. Is that canceled or is that one that's

liked. I think it might be both. I think it might fall under both categories. Awesome. What other great holiday theme? I mean, the Star Wars one is obviously where it goes. The worst. Like, that's the worst case scenario. But even that has some level of charm. I find myself never watching these things live anyway. Like, it's always like on demand and it's the middle of April and I'm watching Christmas episode. I just don't. I feel like, Gavin, you live in a country that this is their whole shtick. I feel like, if anything, this is an attack

against your culture. I live in a country. Are you talking about England or America? England. Oh, what? I don't live there. Wait. No.

What the fuck? What is Andrew's saying? I don't even know what Andrew's saying. What I'm saying is that I view you as like a tourist in a sense to America. Oh, the tourist. Hold on. Add it to the nicknames list.

Gavin, Gavin lives here. Yeah, but he's not American. Pay an awful lot of tax for a tourist. Yeah. I mean, that's an unfortunate part of their culture for you. I don't view you as Gavin the American is all I'm saying. When I think of Gavin, I think Gavin the Brit. And when I think of British, like, BBC shows, they love a Christmas special.

Well, I remember really loving Noel's house party as a kid, the birthplace of Mr. Blobby. But the Christmas episodes, you know, obviously the main show was a... filmed in crinkly bottom, and the Christmas episodes were usually on the road, and I didn't like them as much. But I'm going beyond, like, when, because Gavin and Stacey has, like, a Christmas thing, isn't it, like, Doctor Who? I feel like always does, like, holiday shit. A Christmas special is a textbook way to end a show in England, where, I mean, obviously, we only have, like, one or two series of something, and then it ends on a Christmas special. 14 episodes. Yeah, it's a good way to get everyone together to watch the end of something. Have you seen the Halloween episode of Dawson's Creek, Eric, before making this take? No.

I feel that's important. It gets real spooky. It gets real spooky. Why would it be important? It's essential to the show and culture broadly. I think, I don't know. I saw it once on TV as a kid and I thought it was weird. What happens in the Halloween episode of Dawson's Creek?

I think they go to a haunted house and I think there's like implications of ghosts in that type of thing, but I don't know. I haven't seen it in such a long time. Wait, you're saying that Dawson's Creek showed that ghosts exist like in their universe? I think so. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure that's the thing. It was during the same point of my life

in which I was in the film paparazzi depending on your opinion and how films work. Was that same trip? It was just on cable. I wasn't somebody who watched Dawson's Creek. But I was like, there's like ghosts and stuff in Dawson's Creek. This is odd.

Even if you don't enjoy consuming the seasonal stuff around the year. Do you not find it's useful for it to like be little anchor points in the year? Like, oh, look at the progress of this year. It's almost over because of all the shit. It's almost over because of all the shit.

Yeah, you see Christmas stuff showed up in shops. It's like, oh. Hey, you know what? I do think that, but it's almost over because of all the shit is thought to me more like, oh, it's almost over because all the shit. So it's sort of like the same, but like the other side of the coin, you know what I mean?

It's also really useful if you don't have a calendar. The world just tells you what time it is. Okay, yeah, I guess so. I don't have that luxury in my life. I don't not have a calendar. Yeah, you're like Eric Calendar Bador. That is true. I have to constantly, that is like the biggest struggle in my life is the calendar.

Well, I feel like that's, it's irrelevant anyway, Andrew, because the just nature lets you know what time of view it is. I'm not out there being like oh look all that tinsel and shit it must be winter it's freezing it got very cold in Austin you can live in the desert Arizona

I don't think Arizona gives you any indication I think it absolutely does I think this is coming from someone who's never been to Arizona I've been to their airport so many times right when you can step outside of it

I love Arizona airport it's so long it's flat and long it's flat and long yeah it is like like my back maybe that's why I like it great I think this is so does it apply to even like music you hate an out a holiday album no I'm fine I'm fine with holiday music because it's just that that's to me like it's own separate thing it's not there was one here's the thing if it was

one album that was regular and there was one Christmas song on it that to me that to me is how it feels that to me is how it feels with like here's a holiday episode of Friends, and it's like, I get why you're doing it. I don't have to like it, and I certainly don't. See, I feel almost like for me, the opposite of that, where the album is where I'm on board with what you're saying. Just give me another new album. I don't need to hear you sing jingle all the way. I've got 70,000 versions of that. Right, right, right, right. But so I'm not sure how you're disagreeing with what I'm saying. You're saying that you're okay with the Christmas album. I think I'm generally done with Christmas albums, unless it's original.

You don't like hearing your favorite artist take on a classic Christmas song? No, I think like I've got enough of my favorite artists that have done that. I think I'm good for now. Yeah, I'm not saying that it needs to be like an album of like of Christmas covers. I'm just saying that like if you're going to make a Christmas album, that's fine. Keep it as an album. It's over there and that's, that's okay. I just feel like that's like a time sink where based on what you're saying,

I'm surprised that your perspective isn't like, why didn't you just use that time to make another actual album? that's not how I don't think that's how the creative process necessarily works for sure this stuff I've seen the trailer for rock star starring Mark Wolberg I'm pretty sure I have a good you've never seen the movie I don't know if I've ever seen the trailer from me honest it was just you just said you saw the trailer yeah because it was I was doing a joke about rock star the thing I don't I mean I've probably seen it not in a way that stuck with me it was more a poster I always saw it was constantly in the movie theater hallway and it felt like he was in an apocalypse it just it was a strange

poster in my memory this is a phenomenal episode of regulation takes i'm i'm learning a lot does he not look like he's in an apocalypse in the rock star let me look he it's the one where he's yeah yeah he's like walking yeah it's him it's him walking this is and i remember looking at it going like what is this movie is it about a rock star or is it about a guy in like the apoccal yeah it looks like he's in the apocalypse kind of it does yeah it's Look at the smoke. Look at the people trying to tear them down. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

As a child, I was very confused. Has anyone ever crowd surf like that? Whoa, standing crowd surfing? He just looks like he's walking on top of their heads. Probably Chris Angel, I was going to guess. Yeah, that sounds right. You're talking about the mind freak? Yeah, the mind freak probably did it.

Wow. The one that I think of, like when I think of the standing crowd surf is Iggy Pop from the Stooges. I think that's like the coolest photo. That's so coolest photo ever. I've never seen it. So sick. Yeah. It's awesome.

Just like the movie rock star. Yeah. Okay. Well, anyway, that's my take. That's how I feel. What an interesting take. Yeah. It just hit me.

I had other takes written down and then I unmuted from this sink. And I hate this fucking thing bothers the hell out of me. That's my take. I think I just, to tack on to your take there, I just hate live service software. I hate that I can open a piece of software that I put yesterday. and it might be completely different without any option for keeping the old version.

Is this you agreeing with his take or is that your take? No, that's just a little side take. Well, then maybe after the side take, you should lead us with what your take is. The 24-hour clock is not maths, all right? You don't have to do any maths to learn the 24-hour clock.

You just have to memorize it, all right? I feel like I've mentioned this before. Americans call it military time. I guess the American military is they use it. But it's just a time. It's a good guess. There's 24 hours in the day, right? Mm-hmm.

You can separate it. It's 212s. But don't be like, oh, I can't figure out 1,500. I need to subtract 12. Don't bother about it. Just make sure in your head that 15 just kind of feels like a 3. Interesting. 23.

Oh, very 11y of 23 there. See, I think the, issue though is like when they ask you to recite the alphabet backwards you just don't you haven't thought of it that way what I think what you're like you'd have to memorize it backwards yeah like you haven't just thought about it like I agree it's not a big ask but when you haven't been taught that way and you've been taught an opposing way I think there's a little bit of a hurdle I think what you're saying is that they need to institute this as like knowledge that like when you

learn time I don't think you need to be toy it either I think you should just have a few clocks in your life that are always stuck on 24 hours And then you just start to feel like, oh, it's getting dark out. Ooh, feels a little bit 18. That must be six. Why is that the superior time? Well, it tells you what time of, you don't have to specify a.m. or PM. Yeah.

Is that your entire basis for it, Gavin? Well, it's just how many hours there are. Yeah, but your take is essentially that we should get rid of the other form of time. So I'm asking, in that. I don't think you should get rid of it in terms of how you say it. Like, you don't have to say 1,300 hours. You could say one, but just look at the 13 and think one. Just do the, do the translation to use, is just use both.

It sounds like it. Your take is people should be able to use. This feels very personal, like you just It feels incredibly personal. No, I look at, I look at the time in 24 hours and I speak it in 12. Okay, but what are you trying to institute here with this take? Then everyone does that? Is that like, typically a take is,

you're encountering an annoyance or like you have an opinion on how the world should change. I guess what I'm asking is why do you think it should change that way? I think it's just because I've lived here for a long time and every time someone sees my phone, they ask me why

I'm using military time and I have to inform them. It's just the time and it's actually quite easy to memorize 12 things. On TV, do they advertise the start times in the 24 hour clock or is it done AM PM?

What do you mean, sorry? In England. When you're in England, if there's like a, oh, tonight it, normally in the States, it'd be like 8 p.m. Tune for this. I think they still say 8 p.m. and stuff. England is like, it's always been the in-between. Like, I feel like it takes from the U.S. and Europe, because it's so old.

It didn't convert everything to metric. It's like still stuck in the middle. So you should be able to use both. Is there a place of the world that only uses the 24-hour clock? Yeah, the military. Why, yeah. Military-European countries more so. Interesting.

Interesting. I really like this hot take because it's nuts and I can't make heads or tails about what it is you want out of this because you keep saying you want go 24 but also still say 8 p.m. He wants people to be smarter, I think is what he's saying. I just think you should be able to read it without doing maths. I think you should just memorize them together. Why are we using both?

I don't, why both? I mean, I could use only 24 hours. I just feel like saying 1340 is a weird if you're not in the military. That to me, speaking it that way, is military time. I went to bed at 23 last night. So you want us to use it,

but you don't want us to say it. I want you to know it. I want you to know it so that when you see it, it's not like, oh, why are you? Your hot take for this is leave me alone about how I have military time on my phone. Don't ask me about my military time phone

That's it But it's no military time But it is here It's the time That's my point though Well I have a question for you Why do you use that time on your phone? So I don't have to figure out

If it's AM or PM What I feel like Yeah when you're telling me That nature naturally tells you that I think nature may give you some indication Did your house have windows I want to sit your phone this way I come inside, I lock myself in a dark, desolate room.

All I have is my phone telling me, oh, sir, it's 1612, time for dinner. I roll over. I roll over again. Is it 1 a.m.? I don't know. This is a conversation I had with someone recently. Let me flip it on its head then. Okay.

You would rather only do 12 twice, right? Uh-huh. I don't care. 12 than 12 more. Yeah, yeah, that's fine. Doesn't matter. Would you be fine with just doing six four times? but we don't

you do well you seem to not want to count all 24 so would you like it smaller chunks would you like 6 a.m. 6 p.m. Oh and then 6 DM maybe 6 FM I think I'd be fine with it if it was

like introduced to me as a kid it's already 430 FM oh fuck man we gotta get out of here like if you did it like that you'd be like why are there so many 6es right why don't we just do it in big and chunks I'm saying don't do it do it do it in one big chunk.

But you don't want us to say it is the thing that keeps getting me. Is that like you want us to use it, but then don't tell me. You could tell whatever you want, but I'm saying, it's 2015. I'm saying, saying it that way is how the military does it, but reading it that way is how most of the world does it. But is the point of the AMPM system is that at the peak of, of a.m. that's like the middle of the day for you, like that should be when the sun is halfway through. Is that the reason? Well, the sun isn't halfway through. Why is the 12

the cutoff is what I'm saying? Oh, it's based on ancient shit, isn't it? Is it? Well, I was asked. The sun isn't at its highest point at noon. So if it's the time, the time would have to change every single day for that to be true. So if it's 12.30 p.m., what time do you want me to say, 12.30, that's it. It's 30. Okay. I'm not talking about, so at 12.30 a.m., what time do I sit? Do I just go, guys, it's 30? It's double 30. I'm not talking about not figuring out what time it is because I can't see outside. I'm looking, I'm talking like, oh, this file name, it says it was made at this time, blah, blah, blah. To see it written shouldn't be confusing. But you don't have to say it that way.

Computer say AM or PM. See, now I'm fixated on this AM or PM thing. Why do we decide halfway through? You bring up an interesting point with the six chunks. Why doesn't it go to like 14 a.m. And then the rest PM. You got we got Andrew considering what time it is in goof world. I think Gavin, Gavin, I like this hot take because it truly, it really is a hot take.

It's very good. But now I'm worried about your hot take because it sounds like it's got Andrew thinking. and I don't like that. I feel like it's an interesting hot take because I feel like I've backed myself into a corner that I made and I'm just ready to fight everyone and I don't even really know what I'm fighting for.

I don't either. Whenever I tell people I'm just using normal 24 hour time, they say they don't like it because they don't want to do maths when telling the time. And I'm saying, you don't have to. Just memorize it first, all right?

I still like you to think about and get back to me on why you decided to set that as your clock to begin with. outside of your excuse of so you know what AM or PM is. I want you to dig deep and try to figure out a real reason. Don't you think the AM and PM looks a bit ugly on the end of the time? I've never noticed. You know what, Gavin?

Yeah, I think it's ugly. I don't even have an AM or PM when I look at my clock. My watch has a face on it. You don't have an AM or PM? No, it just says 927. I don't know. Could be PM, could be AM based on this. I bet it says PM when it flips.

Let's see. Let me open. Most of them don't say a.m. Unlocked my phone. I see when it's flipping to noon. I see so it wouldn't matter. But even in the drop-knit, it doesn't. I'll let you know.

I'll keep you updated next when we record later. I'll inform me. Is 12 still noon and 0-0 midnight? Yeah. For you? Just making sure. What are you asking me there? Just making sure it's called the same thing or something.

Not noons-co-do or something like that. One in the off-to-noons could do. only in Jack Black's household isn't known as noon skedoo So what time is it 12 past skadoo Oh my god

It's about a quarter till skidoo If you guys want to get out of here Oh, shit. Oh, my God, dude. Oh, that's funny. Well, speaking of, crazy. Of lunch, that leads to my take. This is something I feel passionate about

because I feel as though I was lied to as a child through media. The amount of times I've seen a pie on a windowsill or a picnic basket available for the taking is zero. I've never seen it out in the wild. I think if you're going to have a picnic, Or you just recently made a pie, it needs to be on your window for at least one hour before you can consume it in a stealable position.

I think it should be available to be taken. I want the opportunity to steal somebody's pie legally, I guess. You want pie thievery. You want pie thievery. I do because I feel like when I see it in the cartoons, when it's like Yogi Bear or whatever, it looks just like fun activity and it's a thing that I want to be told happen to somebody I've never been on the phone with someone and them tell me you'll never believe what happened today I made an apple pie it was delicious as following rules and regulations typically on top of it but oh then my my dog

did something crazy and I went to the other room came back pie gone pie stolen lost it do you just want to walk around and see pies on windows I want to see pies on windowsills I think it will make the streets themselves smell nicer. It is like a scent-based version of the ice cream truck is the way that I am feeling it. You smell a pie in the air, and if you really want to go get it, you can, if they're not on top of it.

They need to be on a lot of life. Do you just like old-timey stuff? I don't think so. Like, do you want to see a pie and then in the next house, you want to see like a woman in a frock using a washboard? I don't know, what's a frog? She's hanging, hanging, she's just hanging laundry on a line out back.

Yeah. I'm not opposed to it, I guess. I don't know. I'm not like cold in a way. Laudering out of a line smells real nice too. I can imagine it does. Andrew, do you have window screens where you live? I do.

Yeah. Okay. So in this theoretical world, the person would have to, put the pie in the window still and remove said that's an interesting point because when I think of kitchen based windows I don't think of them having screens but they would uh yeah I guess I guess you got to remove the screen I think that's a thing you just have to do we'll just have everyone everyone's screen has like a steel flap in it oh like well I mean especially if this becomes like law like where you have to do this there has to be like a pie vent a hole yeah or your pie flap

The pie fooling flap. I don't want to be clear. If you catch them in the act, they're done. They can't try it again. That day. That day. They're banned from that day. If you're just like there, you're like, hey, I see you.

Then you got to go, okay, you got me. And then that's it. They can't make another attempt that day. People who take apples are scrumper's. What are pie takers called? Oh, that's interesting. Because a scrumper, is it like, um, because a scrumper is like in a pre-pie state.

You're stealing the pre-pie. I like apples as pre-pie state. It is, yeah. It's a pre-pie tree. Could they be like pie pinchers? Oh, a pie pincher's good. Yeah. I was pinched again.

Yeah. Oh, pinched again. Andrew, if they made a pie, like, say you could, someone baked a pie, and they found a way to, like, put a string through it and hang it, would you hang one in your car as like the air freshener? Hanging a whole pie? Yeah. Wow.

Wait, is it just like a functional pie that I can eat? A functional pie? Or does it just admit the smell of pie? Is it like a... Oh, is it real? Yeah. It's a real pie, but when you eat it, your car won't smell of pie anymore.

Well, then my car is just never going to smell a pie. I'm just going to eat that pie. I think your take is you just want pie today. I think that's... No. That's sort of how it feels. Honestly, I don't want pie today, but I want to be able to look out my window

and see somebody running down the street with a pie that they just pinched a pie. I want to see pie pinchers. I want to read about it in the news. I want there to be a culture of like, what pie do you make if you don't want it stolen? Like what is the least popular stolen pie? Maybe a key lime,

because I feel like that's tough to steal a keen lime pie. Why is that? Why would that be tough to steal? I just feel like it's very fluid. It's very loose. It's kind of jelloy. You got the whipped cream on top, typically. I don't have you had key lime pie?

Or I think you might have made it wrong. No, it's, maybe this is a Shirley Temple situation where there's a geographic difference in how. Someone put a photo of a key lime pie. Okay. Like the Canada key lime pie is a drink? I don't. There you go. I don't understand what you're talking about.

So see the whipped cream. That in itself is going to be unstable for movement. And that the key line part of it is not as solid as it looks. It's kind of a little jelloy. What? If you sprint with a key lime pie, it looks cheesecakey more than jelloy. Yeah, exactly. And I just sent a pumpkin pie.

It's like the same thing. Yeah. You know what? You're right. But in my brain, you're wrong. Okay, cool. This also sounds right. Yeah.

Okay, great. Thank you. But Andrew, if you, the key lime pie you've had, say it looked like that slice Eric posted. Yeah. Would the, would the middle start, like, drooling out the sides? Huh. I think it could, potentially. I think that's a bad pie.

I think that's a bad pie. Yeah, that's, I think that's what Nick is saying, too. I think Nick is letting him know that, like, I think you've had bad key lime pie. I think so. Shit. Oh, no. Well, then I guess, well, no, this opens me up to pinch a key lime. Excellent.

Because I wouldn't before. Well, I still think in a windy situation, you could take some of that whipped cream in the face. You could, absolutely. I think any movement, any whipped cream-based pie, I think is a lemon meringue, incredibly dangerous. And on a summer day, you're probably dealing with maybe a bit of that melt that you're thinking of. Yeah, I guess what I'm really saying is that, like, I trust the top of a pie more than just this loosey-goosey pie situation we got with. So, okay, hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on. Because you're talking about these loose things or whatever, but an apple pie is just pieces of, I don't, I don't understand it.

There's a shell on the top. Yeah, there's a crust that contains. He's thinking of the lattice or the shell, yeah. The shell keeps it all intact. Even a crisp, I feel like, weighs it down. The lid. Yeah, a pilot. A pilot for the pinching.

I just think life would be better at every way if people, whenever they made a pie, had to defend it in some capacity. I think deep down If I know a pie Has been out on the window For an hour I'm gonna eat it less I'm thinking there's been

Like flies on it Could have been Gotta get there early Maybe people have been Looking at it Contemplating theft And drooling in it Or something

Gotta get there early For what Andrew The pie But if it has to remain On the window sill for an hour Oh you're saying Get there early

To steal it So you don't have to worry About the flies Get where early Their wind Wherever there's pie. Whose window? You know what, Gavin?

You could steal your friend's pies. Have you thought about that? So I've just got to be looking at their window and... No, no, no, no, no. I'm going to give you, give you, pretend you're calling me right now. Ring ring. Oh, hey. Hi, Andrew.

Hey, hey, Gavin. How are you? Uh, yeah, a little bit of a tough day. Oh, yeah? Sorry, too. Yeah. I was going to make a key lime pie, but I'm out of key lime. So I'm thinking I might go pumpkin, but I don't know how to do that.

But I do have Cosmic Crisp apples, so maybe I'll make an apple pie. You know what? Today is actually not bad. I'm going to make an apple pie later. Well, thanks for the information. Okay. Why were you calling me? Is everything okay with you?

I was wondering if you wanted to play Arc Raiders. Oh, I'd love to you. Sounds good. I don't know why you started talking to me about pie, to be honest, because I called you. So I was just sort of waiting out. You asked me how I was doing, and I said I wasn't doing well, and it was because I was going to make a key lime. I feel like, you know what? You don't really listen to me, Gavin.

I feel like... I listened to it, and I was befuddled by it. You called me. Well, yeah, it's calling about Arc Raiders. So now, see, this is where Gavin, if he wanted to, could be devious, and when I go to play Arc Raiders, he's this way inside. He set up the trap. He's ready to go, and I can't even be mad at it. My point is...

You can learn about pies, just in conversation. I could learn about pies. Yeah, absolutely checking on people. I learned about pies, yeah. Interesting. I learned. Yeah. I'm trying to look through my contacts

and see if I could call anyone and learn about pies right now. He called Jeff. Well, I don't think you call someone specifically learning about pies, but just in conversation, you may learn, oh, they're baking today. Oh, what's your bacon?

A pie, perhaps? Hey, what's your bacon? A pie, perhaps. those are no well no that you mention it I was gonna make a key line pie but I was out of key lines I think life would be better

in every way I think any disagreement is insane hi this is Eric hi Eric hi Eric what are you doing

I'm just hanging out recording some stuff for work what are you up to man you playing some Riders no I just didn't podcast stuff in that I was just wondering if anything was happening today

that you should mention on the phone. Now, Gavin, are you trying to get to the bottom of if I'm baking any pies you can steal? Ooh. Well, are you? I will, because we're friends, I will say yes, I'm baking a pie today. Excellent. I don't know why you felt the need to tell me that.

Thank you, bye. Is that, is that, is your, is that kind of how you wanted it? Is your mockery in this, Gavin, that people shouldn't tell people they're baking? I don't understand what you're mocking I was I did that cool assuming that Eric wouldn't ever mention the pie and I was blown away that he had been so I didn't know what to do after that

I even like the dynamic that you're presenting I love the idea that there's one person in the friend group that keeps fucking stealing everybody's pies and they're just like we can't tell him we can't tell him I'm worried about Gavin's calling me he must want to get to the pie I'm making he's checking

He only calls me when he wants some pie. I was absolutely, yep, absolutely. I think Eric would be annoyed if one of us took the pie. Oh, I'd be very... We had this conversation last night, Gavin, about what if I put out a bowl of candy for Halloween and Nick came to my house and took it all? Eric was like, you have a bowl of candy? I don't, Eric was like, I don't care if like one kid takes all the candy.

I put out the candy and then it's all gone. It's fine. And then I was like, what if Nick took it? And Eric went quiet for like three seconds and was like, I'd be furious. I'd be so upset if I put out this bowl of candy and Nick came over and just took all the candy. Now, is it Nick specific or is it any adult? No, Nick. There's just something about, like, Nick coming to my house to be like, and I've taken your candy now is.

The scenario was that you've already gone trick-or-treating with Archie and he's gone to bed and then you came back. Hi, this is Eric. Hey, Eric, are you putting out a bowl of candy here? you'll never get my candy and you'll never get my pie you bastard but my son but we will get his takes nick do you want to tell us your take i would love to tell you my take let's see which one of these should i lead with you know we're on a food kick so i'll i'll follow you into this please um you know we've been talking a lot about the i feel like the fall off of the french fry and while it is enjoyable i find that oftentimes i don't want to

eat all these extra fried pieces of carb-loaded potatoes. They're good, but it's just, it's too much, right? It gives you that heavy feeling. So I think that fast food meals should come with, like, as a combo meal, either a protein box or like a substitution option where you drop the fry and you trade it in for a burger. You can have like a dollar for you two because I'm not sure. You want a bugger with a burger with a chicken sandwich? As soon as he started, I knew it as soon as he started.

As soon as he's like, we're dropping fries. I'm like, his side is going to be a second hamburger. There's no way. You can charge an extra dollar to make up the difference if you need to or whatever. But what is your issue with fries? Your reasoning is that the fries are unhealthy. So you want a second fast food burger? Sure.

It's got a protein. It does that protein. Or a side of chicken nuggets. Oh, chicken fries. Something like that. They're shaped like fries, but they're chicken. BK makes them. Yeah, they're good.

Yeah, those are good. Better than nuts. They're the only thing at BK that's good. Yeah. How would you feel if the sweet potato became the standard fry? It's not my favorite, but I would probably like to give it a shot at some fast food restaurants because it is a healthier. Well, it's a healthy year. Why are you focused on health in the fast food place?

Because Nick is, Nick is chaotic when it comes to food and he wants to have all of it all the time, but he's incredibly... restrictive with himself, so he doesn't go overboard, but then it leads you to situations like this where he goes, what if instead of french fries, I got a second hamburger? What if my... Yeah, go ahead, Gavin, go ahead. Okay, what if... Go ahead. In every human's neck was like a two-way valve, like a valve that split direct...

So some... So the food you wanted went down your esophagus, and the food you didn't want just came out the side of your neck and like down your shoulder. shoulder. Would you divert your fries out so you didn't have to digest them, but you want the taste? No, I don't think I'd go that far. What if you had a spit bucket and you just chewed but didn't eat? I feel like you're missing the key function of swallowing the food. Swallowing is a nice part of it. Yeah. It is. It is an essential... Probably one of my top three favorite parts of it, yeah. That's why chewing gum is like edging to eating. Jesus Christ. Was that Jeff or was that you. I just remember that was in the past.

Oh, was that? Oh, I don't know. That was me separate from Jeff. No, that was, I think, Jeff I think that's a quote from Kimmy Schmidt, I think. Oh. I didn't watch. Well, I watched the first season. I watched the first season. Yeah. Look at us. I don't, if, if you want to eat it, but

I don't understand. Okay. I don't get it. Okay, no going. It's just a weird mentality thing, I think. And I will say this, fries often more times, obviously fried, they're called fries. And as a, I feel like as a result, I end up having more stomach aches if I end up eating like a whole thing of fries to go with a burger. But two burgers, two sandwiches, not bad.

What? Why are you laughing? Get that data from that. Yeah, I don't think, I think the burger might be more of. Yeah. If you always have the burger, how do you know it's the fries? Because I sometimes get fries. That's how I have known to make the switch to the burger.

So you sometimes only get fries with no burger is what you say. I'll get a burger and fries sometimes. But then now more frequently, I'll get like a burger. and another sandwich or something. Go with it. Then the issue is reduced. I just feel like the fries are the best part of the meal potentially. Interesting.

Depending on the place. Like obviously, fry quality can change dramatically. Oh, certainly. Yeah. And, you know, places that have worse fries, like McDonald's probably has the best fries, right? But at Waterburger, their fries are, yeah.

Can I put out maybe a conspiracy theory? Okay. I think fries are getting colder. Interesting. When I was a kid, I swear, I ate way less cold fries. Did you ever have... This is just by virtue of you getting things delivered versus you going and getting the things. No, even going there.

I just feel like the bottom half of fries is always just stone cold these days. Do you think maybe as a kid you just had a better tolerance for things that were hot to eat and we're just eating them more quickly? as they were still warm. Oh, that's possible. Do you think you got a smaller french fry? I don't know. You just brought back. Your mouth's bigger.

A memory for me of a child of getting fry so hot. It burnt, burnt to eat. But when was the last time that happened to you? It's probably seven. There you go. It's homemade fries. Yeah. When you get it, like one, they're so fresh.

They're right out of the deep friar. You can hit a heat. It's probably not the fry. It's probably the oil at that point, but... So not made in your home, or you had a deep fry. home or you had a deep fry? My grandpa had a deep friar, so if I was at his place, and I had chicken fries made by them. It's the hottest fry I've ever had.

But as I'm saying it out loud, I do think it's probably because the oil wasn't properly fully removed from the fry. I think it's probably a hot oil situation as opposed to a hot potato. Oh, those are some good fries, though. They sound good. And I'm not saying get rid of the fry option here, fellas. I'm just saying, add another option in case we want to have. Yeah, I don't think there's anything wrong with that.

I think my ideal scenario would be if I had a Big Mac, right, and then I got maybe a quarter of the amount of fries, but they were, each one was piping hot. I would prefer that over what I get now. The problem is to get a big drink, you've got to get a big fry. Now, is this something that applies to like Wendy's already? Do you know? I'm going to test.

Wendy. I don't think Wendy's does. Doesn't shortstop do it? or someplace like that? I've never heard of that. Short stuff, might. It's like a really small place here. I've never been there,

but I've heard that you can get, like, instead of fries, you can, like, substitute like a hot dog or something as, like a side. Oh, shit. Hold on. Amanda. What? You got to go. I know, I know we're doing for lunch.

I know we're doing for lunch. Well, here's the problem is, like, when you talk about, when you talk about fast food sides and wanting to do this, I think about if I go to like a restaurant they'll have a bunch of side options but a lot of fast food places

don't really have an equivalent to the fry substitute. Now I understand what you're saying of like you want a burger but I'm just saying generally speaking I don't feel like they offer alternatives do you want a fast version of restaurant size? Would you want a

Big Mac with asparagus? Ooh grilled asparagus? Yeah but see this is where Wendy's is the only place I could think of that actually has sides so I'm gonna test right now I'm on their website

I'm clicking at Dave's combo I want a medium just to see you count like appetizer things aside Andrew because places like jack in the box have like jalapeno poppers that's interesting some places have like onion rings

and things like that like I'd go with a small order on jalapeno poppers instead of fries so defaults medium natural cut fries I'm going to click the edit button small cut swap your side you know what no they do give options you could have a baked potato

you could have chili Applebytes So you at least have an alternate method of fries for Wendy's but I see your point. Like I've never seen though get a smaller like a kid's burger as aside with your

Dave's double. I think the worst part of this hot take that he just laid out is that Jeff would 100% be on his side. Absolutely he would be Oh I have $40 in Wendy's points Okay. This is Nick, this is just the hot take so Nick can go get

lunch. No. I was wondering, Nick, if you took away food and sports, what is left of you? I like hiking a lot. Oh, interesting. Yeah. I like the outdoors. Those things took away food and sports. Video games are fun. I like those.

I would be so fascinated to see what Gavin was like without the ability to use cameras. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That would be interesting. What would you do?

I'd have to remember things. Get good at telling stories, I guess. Oh, man. Quick, it's 1400. What time is that PM? Well, here's the thing that typically happens. This, it's already, here's the thing. It's already 651 FM.

This is, we typically do two hot takes. I think these cakes were so hot that it's one each. I don't even know what to do. Andrew thoughts? Yeah, I mean, we are like 45 minutes into this recording, each with one take. Does anyone have speed takes? Yeah, oh yeah, is anyone have a good speed take? I can do a speed take.

Oh, here's my speed take. Chips should be good for you. That's it. Oh, I like that. That's good. I don't like healthy chips, though. I don't either, but they should make some that are good. They should make chips that are good for you.

I agree. Okay, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm on that. I want there to be good soda. that has biotic in it. Oh, because we're doing too many prebiotic. It's just whenever I'll see like a cool looking new soda, then it'll say biotic in some form on it,

and I just go, that sucks. I'm not going to like that. That's going to taste terrible. So in line with yours, nah, I don't like kombucha. I don't like any of that stuff. Would you like a prebiotic pre-pie drink? What?

Would you like some apple juice? Only at 12 pascadou. Uh, my, my quick take is when you file your taxes, there's a section on it that says, how much do you like sports? One through ten. Uh-huh. And then you circle what sports you like. And then they randomly pick, like, when you get summoned for jury duty, you will get summoned.

You can't be above a six on how into the sports. You can't be lower than a four. can't be higher than unless bump it to seven can't be higher than to seven you get invited to a game much like you get summoned for jury duty

and your entire job is to make rulings on controversial calls I think the casual viewer is more aligned with what the consensus fan thinks of whether that is a catch or not a catch

than the rules officials So it's like an expertless decision, like a jury? Yes. But they, I think like if you have, if you like sports but you're not like tied to any team, you don't have a fan, you're like, yeah, they're fine. I enjoy it when I see them. I think that that person would consistently make better rulings or at least more accepted rulings than the established system that we have. Because like you see clips and it's like that is so clearly a catch, but by definition of the rule, it's technically not. Just have somebody who doesn't know the rules and they'll be like, yeah, it's a catch. I can just see that to catch. Have somebody who doesn't know the rule. I think it's important to have someone who doesn't know the rules is a factor in some of the rule decisions. I think they give a better perspective than letter of the law.

And I think it's a fun. Wait, who thinks a sport is six out of ten but doesn't know the rules? 90% of people that watch the NFL Wow So it's like obscure rules Not even obscure rules Gavin It's like the system Like you can watch the I am one of these people I enjoy watching the NFL a lot

I watch every Sunday I don't know defensive schemes Is that a rule though? That's not a rule no but it's like knowledge of the game I'm probably actually the worst example Because I did read the NFL rule book Just out of curiosity And it's so weird quirks in there

You didn't print it, though, right? Didn't print it, but you can, like, there's nothing in the rules to stop a team from faking injuries to get timeouts. Yeah, stop a dog from playing football, yeah. Oh, that also is. Computer could handle printing all of hockey law. Oh, yeah, my new computer absolutely can.

Oh, that's right. It's great. I want to new setup. But I agree, Eric. I like, we did some bite-sized takes. I don't think we need to do another full round. It's incredible. we got Nick wanting a second burger you hate themed stuff and I think pies should be stolen yeah

I think this is a great world I'm adopting some of these things in the goof world for sure I know that's the thing that's the thing I'm worried about is that's that's what you're doing that's that makes me nervous and if you want more great content like this you can adopt our Patreon by going to patreon.com slash the regulation pod becoming a member we got all sorts of stuff Legal things. Some illegal things. This is a crazy episode of regulation takes. I had some one of the best.

I loved it. Skidoo, 12 past skidoo. Don't forget it. Have a great noon scadu. Have a great new skidoo. And good luck to you. We will be back. Goodbye.

Bye.