F**kface - Shaft, Sack, and Crack Wax // Glozenge [179]

Episode Date: November 8, 2023

Geoff, Gavin, and Andrew talk about the seasons of Andrew, the horrible SnowRunner update, watching cable, Stay Tuned!, childhood commercials, George Clooney, Flo from Progressive, the Sonic guys, shoulder falcon, F**kface jerseys, getting your anus waxed, at home ass waxing pulley systems, Andrews shameception, hoagies, grinders, and subs, cursive writing in school, John Carpenter is Geoff’s spirit animal, popsicles, the Halloween movies, being accused of killing people, running into regulation listeners, Clown Core, writing gay sci-fi smut, and more. Subscribe to the LetsPlay channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCkxctb0jr8vwa4Do6c6su0Q . Sponsored by HelloFresh (http://hellofresh.com/facefree Code facefree), BetterHelp (http://betterhelp.com/face), and Gamer Supps (https://gamersupps.gg/Face Code Face). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Visit dragonsdogma.com to buy the game and start your epic quest today. That's D-R-A-G-O-N-S-D-O-G-M-A.com to learn more. Nick looks like he doesn't know how his body works. Like he just got put into that body. Yeah, that's Nick. You know what? I'm seeing too much of Nick's feet.

I sent that to Tony, and Tony kind of said the same thing. I don't like the regulation feet and all, but I don't say no uh we I just really like that shirt I'm such a big fan of that shirt like they look like dog feet what you look kind of like dog no I know what you're saying I know what you're saying they're like pale dog feet yeah what I think it's just maybe the angle they're front on it's a normal angle you're right though Gav they're kind of like dog feet They're kind of like arrows feet Yeah it's almost like there's too much foot

Between the heel and the toes Yeah You think his feet You think it's too long Like he has long Feet I don't know the shoes are doing no favors I think it's the shoes I think it's the shoes.

I think it's the straps. Yeah. I mean, it's a, it's a crazy, I think that's a crazy shoe to wear to Disney. You know what I mean? Well,

there's, there's kids. Yeah. Well, hang on, hang on. What does there's kids around mean? Oh,

you know, it's a lot of foot. Could have shield their eyes from. That's what you think I'm talking about? I don't want my kids seeing those strangers' feet. I just meant that it's a lot of walking. You know what it kind of looks like?

It looks like he's wearing shoes that prepare your feet to go into clown shoes. Like in stretching his foot out. Oh, like bindings for clown shoes. He's getting roasted so fucking hard and he's on vacation. No, no, no. Not at all.

It's like a reverse binding. It's like, it's like, it would be like fixing binding. Like stretching the feet back out. Like traction.

This is, no. Okay. This is episode 179. Can we not talk about Nick's feet? He's wearing his traction sandies.

I know it's Gavin's favorite subject. Can we not talk about these feet anymore, please? You know, you know the, hello and welcome to another episode of face jeff ramsey andrew panting again free you know what's the problem with fucking shoes like these right especially in public in a place like disneyland that there's hardly any shoe on it

well yeah that there's hardly any shoe that there's mostly skin and you know what's on the ground? Piss, vomit, poop, oil, dirty rain, food, trash, maggots. Everything in the world that you don't want to touch with your skin is on the ground. I'll never understand why people want to put their skin on the dirty, dirt, dirt ground.

At Disney World? Or are you just talking like in general? In general, but also at Disney World. Yeah, Disney World's known for its maggots and in general? In general, but also at Disney World. Yeah, Disney World's known for its maggots and dirty rain. Yeah, maggots and dirty rain everywhere. I think my biggest issue with Nick's shoes is they originally started as Jordans, and that's all that's left. For people that can't see them, it's two straps. It looks like two pieces of plastic over.

I need to immediately apologize because I've been dicking everyone around all day. And I assume there were no pleasantries today. No, there were none. There were none. No, I think the pleasantries that we had were you guys just slamming Nick for two solid minutes. No, the pleasantries were I said to Eric, shouldn't there be more people here? And he said, I agree.

And then we started. They were pretty short pleasantries. They were. I'd say no pleasantries at all. I'd like to take over the show for a minute and just by all means. Yeah, I'm taking it over just for a moment before we get too deep.

To apologize for last episode, I don't know what happened last episode. The one where you were all fired. You were in a lobby. You got lobbied. I've been thinking a lot about it. There was a lot of sass. You thought our coffee was dog shit. It was a great episode. you had a tree trunk neck

it was season 2 Andrew for sure oh that's such a great way to put it that's exactly what it was it was like I was possessed by Johnny Caviar or like you know that pill so it sounds like we went from summer of 98 season 98 to season

2 2 so this is season 22 two dash two two two hyphen two two hyphen don't think about it too much start it was does that start this episode or did that start last episode i guess it was last episode yeah i don't know but that that character arc is done it was that was like it was like i took the pill from the limitless but instead of unlocking my brain it just unlocked all the snark i could just whatever the snarkiest reply was i spent i was well we also recorded a snow runners video later that day and i'm so sorry about that too it extended into that i went to bed that night scared that I wouldn't that this wouldn't

that this is who I am I'm just now this person I was walking around going I don't know what's wrong with me today and other people in my life were being like yeah I don't you're this is weird

you're acting weird today and I felt I felt better I think what it might have been I think I've thought about this a lot I think all of the conversation about killing me initiated my internal fight or flight and i went fight mode and it lasted the rest of the day

you know i think that's fair and i don't think you have anything to be sorry for yeah i agree i just want to make sure that this is a real zazzle of an episode so i just wanted to open up yeah i apologize i understand i uh I just want you to know, Andrew, that I love every season's Andrew. It doesn't matter. I'll take whichever one of you I can get. I love you too, Jeff. I love that. Well, okay, that's fine.

You live your life, Gavin. I'm happy. That was that one season where you were printing the law for the entire season. That was terrible, Andrew season. I would take that guy back in a second. Yeah. Over no Andrew? Shit.

I'll just, you know what, I'm happy. I'm happy to, did you guys have coffee today? Was that able to have? No. No,

we decided never to do that again after a year. No. Yeah, I think they got really hurt by being attacked for getting the coffee. The store actually

closed down as well. No. No. got really hurt by being attacked getting the store actually closed down as well no no no no we haven't we haven't been out of town he's playing with trampolines or something yeah he's doing stuff Jeff you had you record episode so all right that was very vulnerable very nice I'd recommend people listen to it but I'm happy you guys are getting

coffee I hope you continue to get coffee i hope my one day of sass has not chased to lay any potential coffee what before here's what i here's what i hope i hope that we don't get coffee for another six years because then i get to do another episode that's a free episode for me six years from now that's true yeah you mentioned snowrunner we did an episode inrunner. I'm hoping it's the first of many episodes of Snowrunner. But can I take a second since you took over the show for a little bit? Can I take a second? Take over the show a little bit to complain about how fucking Snowrunner is ruining my life. Fix the servers. It's unplayable. It's impossible to play! It's destroying my friendships! I have nothing to do! No, I don't want to play any other video games! We just want to play SnowRunner every

night and every night! We beat our heads against the wall for four fucking hours just trying to play the goddamn game since the update! It's useless! Ha! You get dropped left and right multiple times. Oh my God. Gavin, do you remember the one time you played

before you got scared and never were available again, which was braver than anything Andrew ever did, who told me he's building up courage to play with us. I am. Like he's playing with the fucking Harlem Globetrotters or something. It's just three idiots. I am. Yeah. Fucking that night, Globetrotters or something. It's just three idiots. I am. Yeah.

Fucking that night we were trying to accomplish something. We were trying to go from the south of that one map in Russia to the north of another map in Russia to deliver some steel beams so that we could do part one of a task to unlock a garage. When you unlock the garage, that allows you to load up into a level. Otherwise, you have to drive to that map. But once there's a garage there, you can spawn in that garage, right?

So it really makes life a lot easier when you have garages. So that night when you and I were playing, I don't remember how long ago that was, Gav, but you were driving that, you were trying to carry that F-750 around, right? Yeah. We've been trying to complete that phase of that mission since that night we did it two nights ago two nights ago it it's taken us every single night seven nights a

week it has taken us that long to stay in a game long enough and also to do what has turned out to be an incredibly impossible fucking mission. Oh, I picked a real win at the time. Probably 15 hours of work we've put into it at this point of getting dropped, of losing progress, of like doing everything in

our power to get the game to work. Delete this DLC. Delete. Add that DLC. Fuck it. Try to load it this way. Don't accept that invite. Join. Every single thing you can think of.

Turn this setting down. Turn that setting off. Every single thing you can think of. And it's just been fucking a mess, dude, to the point where I didn't even play last night. I didn't even try. I was so despondent. They were playing a different game, and I just didn't even feel like it. And so I didn't even play last night. I didn't even try. I was so despondent. They were playing a different game and I

just didn't even feel like it. And so I don't know what to do. All I want to do, and the more it doesn't work, the more I want to play it. Have they acknowledged that there's an issue or is it just affecting you guys? You just read about it on Reddit. The consensus

seems to be that the Xbox version is pretty fucking buggy. Should we switch pc or something fuck you dude you know how many hours i have in how much work we've done no we just want the version that we're paying for to work trucks don't come i think that's valid i just dropped 90 bucks on dlc like three weeks ago i want to use it oh my god it's free on game pass isn't it yeah but you gotta buy the seasons dude you gotta buy all the seasons how much of that dlc do you have jeff i have all of it i have every piece of dlc in the game that's that's what i figured because i felt i felt so bad about the snow runners thing i was like you know what maybe i'll surprise jeff and i'll gift

him because he can gift things on the xbox store i'm sure that game's got a bunch of skins and I'll throw a skin his way. And I looked at it and I thought Jeff has bought all of this. There's nothing you can get that Jeff doesn't already have. It's because I love it that much. It's because it's that fucking good. When it works. We should put out a part one on

Andrew Potts pretty soon. Yeah, I think we should. We got a lot of stuff to put out you were so fucking sassy in that video especially the first half i was yeah i was i don't know what was going on it was weird oh man that was the half where he had to do the tutorial right yeah yeah the first half was the tutorial great then he had to do well i don't want to spoil the video but he had to do because he deleted his safe in front of eric and i i feel like that okay so what because he had no achievement so he's never done that yeah it's true it's true this is what happened

i've been thinking about this a lot i played that game like you jeff the some of the people i regularly play games with we saw that when it first came on game pass we're like oh let's have some trucking fun and then it was beyond all of our depths. But we played it simultaneously at the same time. So in my head, I remembered that we did co-op together, but we never did. We were just trying to do the tutorial together, and we all got stuck in the mud

and just abandoned it as soon as we couldn't get out. So yeah, that was bad. That was just an all-around not great performance by me as well as my memory um i remember when eric said i've never seen the side of andrew internally i was thinking i've never seen it either this is crazy i didn't know i had two of us oh dude that's so fucking funny oh less sass I have a question that is like the most you guys have talked about the most boring contest before between the two of you. Oh, I have an idea. A challenge that is such a boring challenge, but I kind of want to do it.

Run it by you guys. You guys just watch cable anymore. You just watch TV. Like, I can't remember the last time I just tried to watch TV. Dude, I am am I was about to make a reference that none of you guys are going to get so I won't make it but I yes I still watch TV I'm a I love television

I love I I mean I usually have a purpose it's usually sports or whatever but there are times when I just want to have the experience of being a kid and being bored and flipping through the stations and so I still do that a couple times a week, probably love that. That's exactly because for me, everything is purposeful. So I have cable, but I'm watching like a specific sporting event when I go to it. I was thinking about being a kid and like just sitting in the summers,

watching TV and just channel surfing and just not knowing and using that as my main form of entertainment. I haven't done that in probably like 20 years but it sounds like you regularly do that i wanted to spend just like two days just doing that just trying to recreate just to see what that experience is like what even is on cable now my issue with cable like i've tried this a few times because like i got uh youtube tv during the World Cup and the Euros. And while I have it, I try just watching TV. But it's always an ad. If I'm looking on the guide and I can see something's on and I try and watch it,

I'm always watching it in the middle of an ad, no matter when I start watching television. There are so many ads. The nice thing about that is that it'll only be on the ad will only be on for about two and a half to three minutes and then you'll get to the show. Yeah. But then that'll be like four minutes of show and then another ad. It's more like seven to eight minutes of show. But sure, it's a lot. That's just I don't know, man. That's the TV I grew up on. That's the American style of watching TV, I guess. But I think it's like, you know, they say like they say that kids now in the current age of kids are being raised by iPhones and iPads or whatever.

I was very much an 80s latchkey kid and I was raised by a television. You know, my mom was at work. Most of the time I didn't have a dad. And so I watched so much fucking TV as a kid and it was such a comfortable, welcoming place. Just surfing, bored. Like it actually, I comfortable, welcoming place. Just surfing, bored. It actually, I think, increases creativity. You stop on stuff. You get little ideas. I always end up watching

these southern dudes selling knives on some QVC channel. It's the best. I used to love watching the channel that just told you what was on other channels. That was one of my go-to favorites. It's a great channel. That's how Mario Lopez lives, right?

Exactly. That and the Weather Network. In December, I'm a big Weather Network guy specifically in the month of December. I'll watch that. I'll throw that on. I love the idea of a guy just living between TV shows. Do you ever see that movie?

What was it called? Changing Channels, maybe? Where John Ritter and I think Pam Dauber get sucked into a TV and then they're like in the shows on the TV and when the kids change the channel, it jumps them into the new TV. Like Tron Fratelli?

Like Tron Fratelli, yeah. And I think the bad guy was... The bad guy was the devil, maybe, who was fucking with the family. And I think it... I can't remember the guy's name. But yeah, and so it was like the kids were watching TV

and they're like, Mom and Dad are on TV! And they'd be in an infomercial and they'd change the channel and there'd be a crime drama and they'd be stuck in the crime drama. And yeah, it was cool. That's really cool.

I've never heard of that. Yeah, we should maybe, maybe we'll do a watch along or something. Stay tuned. I don't know if it's bad enough to be good. Stay tuned. I think it's called Stay Tuned.

Stay Tuned. That's exactly what it's called. Yeah. That's a great name for it. I think I'm going to do this. Maybe I'll do some research, see if there's anything worth commenting. Gavin,

you said it's just all commercials, which is funny because at the time, commercials suck, but now I will actively look out commercials from my childhood. I love watching old commercial publications. Oh, yeah. The nostalgia stuff is great. Does that carry over when you get older, Jeff? Do you ever think about, oh, man, commercials when i was in my 30s or when i was 30 what a time that was and because i feel like it's everyone's childhood when they think of commercials

it's just your childhood this actually came up on anma the other day because we were talking about old coffee commercials and that sent me on a tangent where i went home and i just watched a bunch of old folgers and brim coffee commercials uh so it wasn't even just kids stuff i think it's just that time of your life. But no, I do. I will say, you know, I pay attention to commercials during the Super Bowl every year

because it's like an event and you want to see the funny ones. But I don't remember them after that night. I'll be like, oh, good on you, fucking air freshener company. That was pretty funny. But then I, you know, leaves my brain. Did George Clooney ever bang the woman

in the nest cafe adverts did he ever get that done like in a commercial or you mean just sort of like no in the commercial there was like it was like a big you see them i just remember him and daniel uh daniel was in him for a while too he he by the way george clooney's still in the in those commercials uh yeah i think so it's It's Nespresso, right? Yeah. But there was all this like flirting and then the next ever they'd get a little further. But then I just never saw the end. The most recent one I saw

he was at a party. This was like a couple weeks ago. He and a lady had some kind of a bet and he lost it and she got to drive away in his sports car and he had to drive her pink scooter. They're geniuses because we're talking gavin is curious about the narrative arc of the nespresso ads from my childhood together yeah and it's still going that's the story is still unfolding he's just sat home and he hates his kids is there anyone that has done ads that long

like i'm trying to think of like i feel like they rotate out brand ambassadors too frequently to have like fucking flow dude she's been going for a while 20 plus years man there you go 20 fucking years they did a really smart thing to extend the life of that wendy's just did it too in the last couple years and I think it's fucking brilliant. Not that I'm... Fuck, I guess I do care about commercials because here I am talking about it. Yeah, you care. The ones that work.

I think it's really fucking smart when you take a brand and then you build a cast, like a working cast around it. Like the Wendy's employees that all have little personalities almost like you're watching The Office. It really extends the life of those

characters. Those dudes made it for a long time. The Sonic guys? Yeah, the two hot guys in the car. If there would have been two more people in the backseat, they'd probably still be going. I've never seen these guys. You've never seen the two hot guys from the Sonic commercials? No, I don't get Sonic hats.

What's hot about them? We just decided that these guys were uh on face jam we decided these are the two hot guys because they're in ads they must be attractive guys so you're putting two hot guys face jam shit in this yeah this is two hot guys well yeah the two hot guys from sonic right there dude you didn't catch him plugging a face jam shirt the entire time we were talking about Nick. He's always squeezing the shirt. Yeah, no kidding. I'm working, baby. My only question is, does it ever work the other way back?

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Excellent. There you go. Fair trade. Not even trade. You guys don't yell at me when I do it. I get yelled at on the other show.

Oh, so we should yell at you when you promote other podcasts no i mean no it doesn't it doesn't it doesn't change anything i'm just saying i don't get yelled at on this one compared to the other one but it changed how much you go ahead you go that was the most peckish that was the smallest I don't even know what to say that that was. That was the meekish is the word I was looking for. The most meekish you go I've ever heard from anyone. I had no confidence in where I was going with that. Really?

You said it so defeated. I think Gavin feels bad for moving the time around a little bit. It sounded like your penis crawled inside of your body while you were talking. I think it did. There was a little twinge in the penis. You recessed. Oh my god. Well, I was going to say that we sold a Switch Fox.

I think it's okay for Eric to bring up the hot guys every once in a while. Jeff saw that we sold a coin for Face Jam and all of a sudden he's like, let me get my hands on this thing. And then we have another thing coming out for face jam and jeff went oh i want to steal that idea too and it's like i mean do it the falcon yeah every time face jam does something clever i find a way to make it better for face it happens so fast too it happens so quickly it was so fast i feel like since

I hired all those people, their ideas are mine by proxy. Is that the way that works? No. No, they just have really funny ideas and you see them and you're like, oh, that's really cute. We could make a Falcon version of that. It would be even cuter. Oh, that's a great idea. Let's do it.

Are we just spoiling that? Like what we're doing? Are we just saying what we're doing now? No. You already talked about that you already talked about falcon we we talked about that specific thing shoulder falcon well we've talked about it now yeah no gavin gavin doesn't go to the merch meeting so we must have there's no other way dude we had a pretty good merch meeting yesterday. We had a very good merch meeting yesterday. This jersey that I

that Tony dropped today. It's too much. It's too much? I love the idea of combining all this stuff together but once I saw it all together I thought it's a bit busy. No way. Really? I love it. I'm a big fan. I'm okay. Hey, listen, we can hold a vote, I can be outvoted.

This is a democracy. Wow. I think it's great. I saw it. So cool. So, I saw it, and I said, instead of combining two and three, maybe we just go with three, but if you guys like the new combination, I'm totally down with it. I think the combination is really cool. I just

like, this, jerseys that are louder than this exist i know i know and i felt like three didn't go far enough but the elements in it were really great like that's a real enough that's yeah that the san diego padre city connect is a real jersey i don't think what we're doing here is that far off also we should not share that image yet. I'm sharing it here so Gavin can see it. I will. Can I have one of those? See, he likes it.

This jersey, you like that, right? Yeah. Okay. That's when I voted, three to four. So, all right, well, there you go. If Gavin wants it, we'll make it. I mean, it's, look, don't get me wrong. It's disgusting.

I want it. Oh, I think it looks great. I's i i think that we can discuss this so the jersey did well and i keep running into people which by the way i ran into so many i went to a concert uh night before last i should tell you guys about that in a minute but uh i've i've actually run into a lot of people and usually they ask about like when's it gonna be another gerbler drop or whatever but this year i feel like so many people have come up and said hey i really i got a jersey and i just want you to know i really like it and it's a really good quality or like i really i really enjoyed that jersey or man i was bummed i couldn't get a jersey let me know when there's another drop so there seems to be a lot of like genuine enthusiasm

for more jerseys and we were trying to figure out another one to design. And so the initial thought was that was our home jersey. We'll make an away jersey. But then we landed on in the merch meeting. Instead of that, maybe every year we'll just release. In baseball, they do this. Well, I guess in all sports, they do this thing called city jerseys or city connect jerseys

where they make a special jersey that they wear like 12 times a year in basketball that is reminiscent of the city. Like for the Boston Celtics, it would be more Boston themed than Celtics themed, right? Or in the San Diego one, it would be like a bunch of highlighters in an office desk. For some reason. And so we laid out the idea, maybe just yearly we'll do a City Connect jersey. And then so it'll be focused on like the first year we're going to do Key West. The next year it might be Deputy Indiana or wherever.

And then we'll just make a new one every year. I think it's such a great idea. And I love doing Key West as the first one. And this, I love this design that Tony's team put together. I think it's so cool. I think it's so crazy. You've won me over. Wow.

Gavin, is there anything you would change about it? Oh, definitely not. It's perfect. I want to see Gavin wearing this jersey. It is the opposite. Everything about it is the opposite of you. Can we all get together and see if we could help me pull that off? Like what else I need to be wearing?

Oh, I got you. You want to look like you fit in wearing that jersey i got you immediately so so easy i want to see you with the salmon salmon shorts on that jersey and your rainbow shoes and i think you got it you got a good just so much to look at you're not really focused on anything exactly yeah it's just it's a fun it's a fun vibe can I ask a question to the group? Yeah go ahead Has anyone had

Their anus waxed? No I've never even considered it Me neither But I had the realization This week That I think it would feel good Oh can we be there for this?

Is that cool? What do you mean you think it would feel good? I don't think it would feel good. Can we be there for this? Is that cool? What do you mean you think it would feel good? I don't think it would hurt. Oh, this rules. To have the hair pulled? Yeah. Here's what I think. I think you're so desperate to have anybody touch your anus, you're coming

up with medical reasons to do it just so that you can have the experience. Just have... You don't have to go... What? Do you know how much it hurts to get waxed? Don't listen to them, Gavin. I feel like if you went back sack and crack,

I cannot imagine my sack getting waxed. That would be 10 out of 10 painful. But I don't think the skin around my asshole, I don't think it's as sensitive as ball or other area skin. It's funny you say that, because I was thinking about ball bag skin and how funny it would be if ball bag skin was what the top of heads were.

Just imagining knockouts and boxing matches, how much funnier those impacts would be. Oh, like a slow saggy head skin yeah just like the slow motion of getting a knockout punch if people have ball heads that was making me laugh one evening but so

why would you want to get your asshole waxed what is the reason he thinks it's gonna feel good this is a really weird way of seeing you like your asshole touched or like played with that's what i'm saying don't touch it or play with it wax it that's it just tug the hair out so do you think hair getting pulled is pleasurable in any other part of your body uh if the answer is no then it isn't about being the hair being pulled no maybe he's like maybe he's on to something.

There's areas of my skin that feel really numb. And if I pull hair out of those, it doesn't hurt. Is your ass one of those places? No. Oh, interesting. The thing is, it's just a theory. It's just a theory. Yeah, I know.

And we have to put it into practice. An ass theory. I'll tell you what, dude gonna i'll tell you what dude i'll tell you what i think it'll hurt a lot to get my asshole waxed but what if we go get our assholes waxed together okay yeah that's supplemental i would sign up i mean i'm i'm looking i'm trying to look at one that will come to us and we do it somewhere even even better that's i'm i'm looking it's it's harder it appears to be harder than i anticipated a come a come to you wax yeah a come to you anal waxer specifically oh my god that's a real niche

market yeah emily owns a salon she probably knows tons of people that wax assholes I can just ask her if one of her friends will do it yeah well if she says no Gracie has a really good idea where we hire someone from TaskRabbit oh perfect I don't how do we do it like privately

privately what does that mean people who I work with aren't looking at my arsehole no no no i get it stranger to be messing with it no no i understand i think i think we can do it and i think it has to do with um oh i found a place i think um it's called twig and berries brazilian shaft sack and crack. 80 bucks. Perfect. Now, I don't want anyone to touch my shaft or anything. Oh, okay.

Then they have full booty for 45. Okay. So what we can do, we'll get Gavin a full booty. I'll also do the full booty. Oh, wow. And then we'll set up a GoPro on our faces. And then the other person will be on the other side of the door. Yes.

And we'll film their reaction while we all listen through the door. Why don't we just put our heads through a hole in the wall? Where is there a hole in the wall? Like a guillotine? No, I like the idea. That's how they filmed the

MGM Lion logo. Why don't we do that? Why don't we make your guy's face equivalent to the MGM lion logo. Why don't we do that? Why don't we make, like, your guy's face equivalent to the MGM lion logo? That's why he's roaring at the logo. He's getting his ass waxed by that. Alright, so if it's like, we do it where it looks like a lion,

like the lion roar from the MGM logo. I think that's the way, yeah, I like that. So, okay, we'll figure out it might have to be more of like a sheet situation where it's being held up or something. We've got a record So, okay, we'll figure out. It might have to be more of like a sheet situation where it's being held up or something. We've got a record of wax roars, and we've got to play those before face supplementers.

Yes. This is a great idea. Oh. Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba! This is great. I'm so excited. Oh, I'm so excited to see that. I'm fucking sweating. I think this is the most wrong you've ever been,

but in the most delightful of ways I'm so excited I would love the opinion of the audience on this one if anyone's had it done, male or female around the anus, let me know my goal is to get this done before this episode comes out so that way no one can talk about it oh my god

really truly we just created the new face supplemental intro and I cannot wait to start using it. It's going to be two different vibes, too. It'll be Jeff screaming and Gavin going, ooh. Two different notes. Gavin, you have to tell us if you have an orgasm.

Oh, my God. It's a sexual thing. Yeah, right. Gavin suddenly raises four inches oh man oh that's great that's a fantastic idea i can't believe you believe this gavin that's what it got to be an all-time time top Gavin moment Thank you so much Eric are you Getting involved? Oh fuck no absolutely not You're out of your fucking mind for doing this

But you're kind of like a hardcore dude Like dude You're a hardcore And I don't get in the ring to show off my waxed ass You don't have to show anyone You're arguing this is a thing done for pleasure. You think this is a great thing? Like, why are you saying you're a hardcore dude?

You know how hardcore dudes like the joy of getting their ass waxed? It's quite an extreme thing to do for a podcast. It's kind of an extreme work thing. But I'm saying that it's not extreme if you think it's pleasurable. We could change your nickname to Smooth Gooch.

I don't want anything to do with this. I will be there to film it, but I will not be participating. All right, it's just Gavin and I. Absolutely. You guys are insane for doing it. You're nuts to think this is going to feel good. I can't wait to watch this.

Yeah, but not the nuts. If we try to do it with Nick, he'll say, oh, I got mine done last week. I got mine done in preparation for Disney. We've been doing a lot of Let's Play stuff. There's nothing better than when you're playing games

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at HelloFresh.com slash face free with code face free. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. We're coming into the holiday season and I personally love it. This is my favorite time of year. October, November, December

brings me so much joy, but it's also something or a time that is filled with stress. You have so many different things going on. Also, just seasonally, I know it can be really difficult for people not getting a lot of sun. It's a complex thing that for me, it brings a lot of joy, but I understand it's difficult for a lot of people. And even in that joy, there's pressure of like getting gifts and just wanting to make sure that the people in your life feel appreciated, which is something that is hard to feel, I guess, for me, not in the sense of like I can do a lot of things, but just with my anxiety, it can be difficult to feel like I'm

really conveying those messages or even when I know they are just convincing my silly brain that that's the truth. I'm kind of rambling, but this year can be a lot and it's natural to feel sadness or anxiety about it. But adding something new and positive to your life can counteract some of those feelings. Therapy can be a bright spot amid all of the stress and change, something to look forward to to make you feel grounded and to give you tools to manage everything going on. As I say every time I talk about this, therapy, I think, is so important. It's something that has helped me in countless ways, just talking to a professional about issues you're going through or even just to get a personal inventory on yourself and in ways that you might not realize you need help. Or I've had experiences where

I thought I was struggling with one thing and then upon talking to somebody, I realized, oh wow, this is actually like four other things that have nothing to do with what I thought the heart of the issue was. And once you get to a point where you know what that is, you can start working on it and going through that process has changed my life.

So if you're thinking of starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online, designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. Just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist, and you can switch therapists anytime for no additional charge. Find your bright spot this season with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com slash face to get 10% off for your first month. That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash face. Andrew, would you do it up in Canada at a solid area just to see what it's like? I'll have to think about that.

I don't, I don't, I don't. My initial reaction is no, but. What if we got you an at-home kit and you could do it self-administer? Ooh! Oh, it'd be like when parents are trying to, like, pull their kids' teeth out, you could tie it to a door handle

and kick the door closed. Oh, my God! Yes! You slam the door and it rips your ass hair off. We'll have to look at, like, what options are available at home. I would be willing to do it live on the show if we do it at home and some past i'm open to that that would be what what's uh are we talking like standard anatomy down there like i know you've got a tree trunk

neck and a long back like how's the gooch yeah no it's i think it's a pretty regulation gooch i'd say regulation gooch. Not a lot of hair. Do you have a bowling ball in your home at all? I own the Big Lebowski Collector Edition, which is in a plastic bowling ball with the discs inside. You probably don't want to throw that out a window, but wouldn't it be funny if you were going to tie it to the door handle and slam the door shut to rip it off? What if we built a pulley system

and so it went over across the ceiling to your window and you tied it to a brick and you throw the brick out the window and that's what slams the door shut? The longest Rube Goldberg asshole thing? Yeah, what if we do a Rube Goldberg wax? I don't have one, but imagining tying it to a ceiling fan

that spins is also very funny. That's a great idea. Or a moving car. And then you don't know when they're... You just tie it to a car in the parking lot, and you don't know when they're going to leave. So you just sit, and it'll be a surprise. A series of helium balloons. You need enough force for the pull, but you don't know exactly when it's going to happen.

It ends up just being a light tug on your ass. What are the options, Eric, for at-home waxing kits? I'll have to look, because I'm not sure. I've only just found the... Gracie says there's many. I mean, Gracie's probably right. I'm sure there's a lot. I'm in.

So we can find some stuff we'll send you something so you can do it live on the show i am looking at maybe next thursday uh getting an appointment i'm just i'm looking right now to see uh if this space is available and everything this would be great to do before my wedding just in case there's any yeah i absolutely agree You should definitely tell Emily that we're going to do this. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah.

I found... I mean, I think I found the right place for us. It's not too far, and I feel good about it. I found another place that just offers men's Brazilian or crevice and scrotum. Man, I feel like scrotum would hurt so bad.

I don't want that messed with. No, no, I understand. So I'm looking. I found a place. It's looking good right now. I'm going to contact them, ask them about the filming situation, because that's really all we can. Like, we have to film this.

We have to. Oh, yeah. We have to do the intro thing. We have to have the faces. We have to mount a camera looking down with our heads through a thing we'll get it we'll get it it's so funny it was just gonna say like a uniform production and the roman numerals for 2023 really we could get i learned uh when i made a video with nick that he's a tuba player so he could do the music he could do the like the tuba could be the background of like the film intro well we have something here um oh i think we definitely do

oh you all-time bad idea by Gavin. And I love it. Yeah. Man, I was wondering what we were going to talk about today. I should never wonder that ever again. No, no, no. This was the craziest part unprovoked. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, just out of the blue. Shot out of an anal cannon. This is one of my notes for the day. Something we talked about before jeff you hearing voices when you were you're falling asleep and i've seen i saw a lot of people supporting you with similar experience i have started to have a similar issue um but i am

i'm roasting myself in my dreams and it is ever since you talked about hearing voices it is it has become a problem for me it's happened three times now what it's just you talking shit it's me talking shit about myself i'll tell you what the dream is it's what happens what is happening now is in my dream i'll be like walking past a group of people talking and they'll'll be trying to. They'll be saying something that they think is funny. And they'll say it. And my reaction will be. Oh my god that was so unfunny.

That was just awful. Like I am so thankful. That their brain is not mine. And in the world that I view. What is funny and isn't funny. And then I have a realization. That I'm in my own dream and that person i created that person and that person's thoughts only exist because it's in my head and i am the source of

that and then i have to live with that i wake up ashamed i wake up like oh god i feel gross because that person that was such an unfunny thing it's like a shame-ception it's like a shame yes i'm it's an inception but it's just for shame relating to comedy it's i i get and there's no defense like it it's a realization i have in the dream and i just go oh fuck this is all me i can't say that i don't have that brain it's in my brain this is i've invented all this do you have any examples that you remember no i don't unfortunately next time it happens i'll really try to make an effort but it's just it's jokes that are like so either lazy or just like i don't know they're just bad they're just like you the type of thing you would hear

where you just be like that person has no concept of what funny is it's happened a lot i'm sorry you've been afflicted with that dream uh it's honestly i used to when i was having ankle issues i'd re-injure my ankle all the time in my sleep because i was having dreams that i would fall and then i'd physically do the motion and it would re-hurt it i would take those over the shame i feel well not yeah now you're just injuring your pride in your sleep yeah it's just shame-ception that's such a great way what would actually injure the ankle in in your sleep it would be the most no it would be like i stepped off a curve wrong or curb like i stepped off a

curb or like i was walking off of something and then i my ankle would roll and then i'd wake up and my ankle would physically roll but how would it roll in the bed though like my my my the body part like i'd curve my ankle in like i do physical motion i can see i can see that i can you're not you're not hitting it on the wall or like in the you're just moving your ankle well yeah but it's when like the ankles really sore and like moving it hurts so like i'm curving it like i'm stretching those tendons when they're trying to heal it's like it's like in the matrix like your body makes it real yes yes it does it sucks it's not a fun time you know what else isn't a fun time i need

to rant about something please do i've been having to eat fucking hoagie sandwiches every day because playstation doesn't know how to make a console i'm so goddamn mad i bought what's this we're doing the let's we're doing the let's play stuff gavin yeah and i've i've wanted to incorporate some older games and eric and i were talking about that there's a sopranos game that i always wanted to play so we're like oh that'd be such a fun game for the two of us to go through. So I bought an original launch PS3 because only the launch PS3s have backwards compatibility for both PS1 and PS2. And then I got a copy of the game. It's tough to find. It is like a whole thing. I get everything we're supposed to record this week. I wanted to really get into the experience

so I bought all of the things for the Tony Soprano sandwich and I got hoagies I bought a pack of six this is gonna be great the night before I go to set everything up and it just won't work and I can't figure out what's wrong so then I google it every ps3 on a hardware level does not let you capture through HDMI. They block it. Yeah, HDCP. Yeah. Well, I didn't know that. I had zero awareness that that was a thing that was on a hardware level.

Yeah. Yeah, I guess I did know that. Oh, is that? Great. That might be why you were using component cables, now that I think about it. Yeah. For the video with the wind purple or whatever. That's really funny.

So I've been looking into a fix, and I found one. I ordered it, and I guess that company realized that their splitter was removing HDCP when it's not supposed to. So they updated it. So it didn't work.

So I just bought a pointless splitter. So now I bought another one. I'm two splitters in. Hopefully this one works. I just want to play the Sopranos game. And I don't want to waste all the hoagie rolls that I bought. So I've been eating hoagie sandwiches every day. It's impacted my life.

I just had to get that off my chest. By the time you get around to recording that let's play you're gonna be regulation gameplay you're gonna be so fucking sick of hoagie sandwiches you're not gonna be able to eat one on video it's true it's a real fear thankfully we got a little bit of a break it's gonna take until Sunday

for this new splitter to arrive and that one probably won't work so I'll probably have to buy another one what does a hoagie consist of? What is that? It's just a type of roll. It's just like a sandwich bread. Okay. The hoagie itself isn't a sandwich. It's the term for

like a sub sandwich, but like in Philadelphia. Yeah, kind of like northeast. We have too many fucking names for the same sandwich in America. We call them Grinders, Hoagies. I've never heard Grindr. You've never heard Grindr?

No. Yeah, it's Northeast. Like the app I've heard of. Yeah. Similar. Yeah, but this is a sandwich. What you said, Gavin, is essentially what is pretzel? What does that consist of?

It's true. But so go ahead, Jeff. What were you going to say? I was going to say, you know how we always get blamed for killing people and yeah we we had a meeting today where it was 30 minutes of us going did we kill that person is that someone we killed well we're uh nobody lately but we're doing we're doing a project a merch, and we needed to... It covers a lot of different things we've done over the history of the show, and so we had a section for an in-memoriam section.

So we're trying to figure out who we did and didn't kill. Anyway, we always have to take credit for the bad stuff, but I saw this in the news the other day, and I wanted to post it. I want to take credit for this. The state of California just enacted a law requiring teaching cursive writing in schools and 17 other states are following suit I feel like because we talked about cursive or joined

up writing boom we're bringing it back I like it I'm thinking face takes credit for cursive Gavin signing it in yep knew some days we talked about joined up writing and now california has united they've joined up curse there there were so many people on the subreddit that did not know like us we didn't know joint joined up writing and cursive or like the same thing or whatever and then other people had other terms for it but somebody made a poll where they said like is it joined up writing or is it cursive but they're like british so they called it joined up writing or is it cursive? But they're like British. So they called it joined up writing. And then they were very snarky within like the first few minutes of like 15 people voting.

It's cursive. And they went, huh? 15 Americans. You guys are wrong. There are so many votes and they're all for cursive. Yeah. Joined up writing.

He's getting blown out of the water. It is great. I've never, again, never, ever, ever had heard that term until we recorded that episode crazy i also recently uh reading the news you know i saw the uh the whole thing about the

cursive i ran across this article and i've decided that john carpenter the director is my fucking spirit animal legendary horror director john carpenter just wants to play video games watch basketball and eat popsicles. I'm not a master of anything, he says. I agree. I'm not a master of anything either. That's literally all I want to do in life. Maybe bicycle, but mostly video games, basketball, and I had to

stop eating popsicles, cold turkey, because it was all I was eating. Do you remember my banana popsicle phase? Yes. Oh my god. I love that the guy who made Halloween and the thing just wants to fucking eat popsicles and watch the basketball players or watch, what? Just wants to eat. He just wants to eat popsicles and watch basketball.

Me too. Was there ever a thing video game? Yes, there was. Yeah, I was talking about it i talked about it recently oh on this i've never played it i've always wanted to play it what's it on i think i might have i think it's on playstation i think i talked about it yesterday in the alan wake 2 video we made because i just watched the ending of it because it was on reddit and it's supposedly canonical and it adds to the story from the movie

and i guess john carpenter signed off on that and said yeah this is canon and so i was watching the like the final cut scene of the game and we were having a conversation about how like how poorly written video games used to be essentially and it definitely falls into that category i'll uh maybe order that maybe we'll play. Because it's something I've always wanted to try. Because The Thing is one of my favorite movies of all time. Not even like horror. It's in my top five. Have you ever seen the original?

The original black and white version? No, I haven't. It's so good. It's so good. It's not as good as the John Carpenter version, but they're both very, very good. I love John Carpenter. He's such a great director.

I love the keyboard scores. I love him going nuts on the keyboard. I saw a clip of him today, uh, where he was at like some convention and somebody asked him, this kid asked what, how he felt about the Halloween sequels and which one was his favorite. And his response was,

I made the original. That's the only Halloween I care about. I don't care about the other sequels. The only thing I care about with them is the checks coming in. That's all I care about. And I hate to be that way, but it's true. I don't give a fuck about the sentiment outside of what money they give me for those other movies. He's great.

Gotta appreciate it. Are you worried that you brought him up right after you talked about killing people in the show? No! I'm just asking if you're worried. No. Why don't we? Now I am. I didn't even think about that.

No, he's young and fine. And he's he's subsisting off a diet of popsicles and sitting and watching video games. He's not even he's not even going outside. He's safe. He's OK. He'll be he'll live forever. Yeah. No one ever dies from sitting indoors and playing video games with these popsicles.

Too many popsicles. He's gonna stop. He's fine. He's living his best life. He'd be the eighth sin and seventh, and it would just be joy. He was taken because of joy. That was the crime scene. Happy, watching. I wonder what his favorite team is, Carpenter.

Is he a New York guy? I don't know. That's a good question. John Carpenter. Is he a New York guy? I don't know. That's a good question. John Carpenter strikes me as a New York guy. I assume that everybody that likes basketball just likes the Celtics like me until I'm proven wrong. So in my head, he's a big Jason Tatum fan. He's a New York guy. That checks out. That's fine.

We just beat their asses last night, barely. We just beat their asses barely is not typically a combination of words you hear well we beat their asses for the first quarter and then we barely won i feel like you can only say we beat their asses barely when you're like in a boxing match and you've won by a round like i think that's literally the only we beat their asses but barely nah if you watch the game you'd understand what i mean i didn't i missed it unfortunately i was too busy making my ps3 not work you know how uh you know how we always talk about how great it is to run into regulation listeners and comment leavers yeah wild because they're just like we we speak the same language and there's like a kinship there i had well i had the, whatever the opposite of that is the other night,

I went to, you guys know I'm a big Clowncore fan, right? I've talked about them in the past. Yes. And so they played a show in Austin, which was kind of the big deal because they never ever play. And so Antonio and Burndog,

my trucking buddies, they wanted to go. They're how I found out about Clowncore. Oh my God. And Antonio got us on the guest list, and so he got us behind stage and everything, so we got to watch from the side. Fucking phenomenal show, first off.

They actually build a porta potty, and the porta potty comes out on stage, and then they just start playing from the porta potty, and then the walls fall off the porta potty slowly as the show goes on. Absolute insanity. But just a phenomenal show. If they ever come to your town,

I highly recommend you see them play. And a lot of dicks. Oh my God. They have like visuals in the background. They're like playing visuals through all the songs and it's just so many wieners just morphing into other wieners and stuff. It's really weird.

It's like CG wieners or like someone's film stuff? Like porn wieners just morphing into other wieners and stuff it's really weird it's like cg wieners or like someone's film stuff like porn wieners but that have been like like i don't know like stretched and and uh repeated and just like fucked with um it's like a multimedia experience and uh just a really awesome show but i ran into i shit you not maybe 15 people came up to me independently of each other last night to tell me they were they loved achievement hunter and i was like cool man thank you so much and i asked every one of them about face and every one of them was like i don't really like podcasts much so we gotta figure out how to if you know an old achievement hunter fan that doesn't listen to this podcast you you got to convince them to give it a try.

I was telling people like, well, you liked the 10 years of videos I made for you in video games. Maybe you should try this. And they were like, no, I'm good, man. I'm okay. I'm not really a podcast guy. Anyway, it was nice to meet you. And it was nice to meet them all. But man- I kind of get what they mean, though. I don't think you could talk me into listening to a podcast. You don't think if... I don't know to a podcast i you don't think if i i don't know okay how about this like i listen to a podcast made by people i know a lot say you're at an airport and you walk up to edgar wright and he's wiping piss off his forehead and uh he goes oh hey gavin from slow-mo guys and you go yeah that's me gavin for slow-mo guys and he's like

oh man it's fucking great to meet you i'm a big fan and you're like thanks and he's like and you're like i'm a big fan of your work. And he goes, oh really? I really appreciate that. You know, I started a podcast. I think it's the best thing I've ever done. Way better than all those movies I made. You should give it a try.

And you go, I don't think so, Edgar Wright. Anyway, have a good day. No, you're right. I would listen to that. Yeah, you'd be like, holy shit. Edgar Wright just recommended something to me. I'm not comparing us to Edgar Wright, obviously. The only reason I even brought him up

is because Gavin's nephew pissed all over him. Allegedly. Allegedly pissed. Allegedly pissed all over him. Probably not, and hopefully not. Anyway, I'm just always surprised by the intransigence to podcasting in general in the wild, and clearly

those people will never hear this because it's on a podcast, and I'm only speaking to the converted, but I just, I wonder how we break through that. Do you have any other like events you're going to in the next week? You have anything planned? No, nothing. I think it's I wish the concert was tonight because that conversation is so much funnier if you're trying to be like, yeah, I'm getting my asshole wax next week with Gavin.

He thinks it's going to be great. It's true. Maybe that's how i should have approached it i i think that that would get me to listen at least me personally i want to hear what that is you know the mgm logo you know the line we're gonna do that but with our assholes but gavin thinks it's gonna be great he thinks it's gonna be a great time gavin's is gonna be a rainbow going across the screen covering his face just joy do we just need like a is it too hard for people to find like what if we just had little qr codes and we just made people come up to us scatter be like trust me trust me oh that's jeff you need to get a tattoo that subscribes if they put the qr code and then

you have to pressure people into subscribing on the that's that's yeah that's what i was saying a couple months ago uh when i was uh i was getting the um wilford brimley thing wrong is that we should have a business card so we can hand out to people that are just qr codes i think it's funnier to be like just two on you And you've got, I mean, it's a space issue, I know, but... I don't want to get a QR code. I'm not... Whatever happened to you have so many tattoos, it doesn't even matter anymore. You can just put whatever you

want. I think you'd get judgment if you had a QR code. I also, if I get a QR code, I feel like it takes away from the episode 100 tattoos that I got. Okay. Because that was like an on-camera thing. I posted a video. You don't have to watch it right now or anything unless you want to but i posted like a little 30 second video from the show right when i got there right as they were going on oh are they gonna be schlongs in this oh i don't think so i think the wieners showed up later that's

that's cool that so many people there knew of you there oh yeah it was sold out and there were a ton of people there in general i mean they're a, they're a pretty big band, I guess. I think they got started on TikTok, and so... Laughing at the video? Yeah. What's going on? Dante from our IT department was there also, just independent of you,

and he had such a great time. He loves this shit. He's a musician, and he's just like, these guys rip. He loves this shit. He's a musician and he's just like, these guys rip. He loves it. So it's good. Well, first off, it's just two dudes and they are apparently classically trained jazz musicians

and they're both very, very talented. I guess they're in a jazz band that has nothing to do with this. But yeah, it is weird. It's weird in all the best ways. And it's just like you watch it and you go like, I'm glad there's somebody out there making something that off the wall.

I'm glad this exists. It's unlike anything else. And I appreciate it. You know, I don't know. Did you guys start on the on the chair? No, I was going to give an update on that and say I haven't got any replies yet. Yeah, I'm sorry.

I had some homework to do a couple of different things and the chair letter was one of them and I just never got around to writing it. And we need to do that at some point. We also need to write our smut scene for the Clutch My Pearls podcast. Can we talk about that real quick?

Yeah. When it was pitched, I didn't think that it was going to be... Maybe I'm wrong. I don't know. I didn think that it was going to be, maybe I'm wrong, I don't know. I didn't think it was going to be straight. You thought it would be gay? That was the feeling that I had when everyone was talking about it. Yes.

Yes. When we were doing ours, yes. Yeah. Okay. So it wasn't just me. Andrew, you felt the same way? So we're doing gay smut? You can do whatever you want.

I'm just telling you how it felt when you were describing it. Oh, I didn't get that vibe at all. Really? I'm happy to do gay smut. I mean, I'm just as happy to do gay smut as straight smut. That's an interesting thing. I think I'd be worse at writing gay smut. I don't think you'd be great at either,

but I think it's just funnier if we... What if... We got more experienced with straight smut i don't think you'd be great at either but i think it's just funnier if we what if well i got more experienced with straight smut and i don't want you to source your experience when we're writing smut that sounds terrible how am i gonna write that'll be like you say make aliens smut oh yeah you know what that's right they use their they use their real life experience when they wrote jurassic park and Day. You have to have a personal pull to the material you're writing. What are you talking about? What if it's both? What if it's like, because the way in my head we talked about it,

it was like a hot southern dude from Alabama. That's me. And then like a saucy British princess. That's Gavin. I imagine it being a British dude. Yeah, and again, nothing that you've described makes me think it's not what I originally thought that it was. Right.

What if we throw an alien in the mix? I don't want... I'm out. It's like a hot fruition. I'm done. I'm stepping away from this project. What if it's a vampire werewolf? Does that get you back in?

No. I think I'm stepping away due to creative differences but we can solve those differences here what if it's a unknown undiscovered new species called a gloszang yeah i know i'm staying out i'm i'm good interesting and what what if a gloszang has a boy and a girl at the same time and so it's really two people in one and so the the hot southern dude can bang the gloszeng while the gloszeng is also having sex with the saucy british gavin yeah and on his back it has like six poimels i'm i think i'm with andrew that i'm out also my vision vision was Mr. Darcy hooks up with

Mater from Cars. That was pretty much what I thought too. Yeah, that was about it. Well, no, that's not bad either. Gavin, how do you feel about that? Mr. Darcy hooks up with Mater from Cars. So it's the thing that we have to all agree on

the same smut. No, no, you guys are writing it. We're just giving you a perspective. So it's just one story, though? I think it's just one scene. It's just like one sexual encounter. There has to be some agreement, because otherwise my gauze is going to be a bit out of place.

I will also say I've now listened to two episodes of Clutch My Pearls, and I feel out of my depth. I've been exposed to more content of this type and i i don't think i have it in me i don't think i could do this i'm on the sideline with eric so it's not even creative i just personally think okay so if you two are bowing out then gavin you and i are free to go we're gonna gloshenge all over this thing i'm excited to see what you guys do with the gloshenges and what are the things on the back called again the six of them yeah there's poimals

poimals okay I can't wait I can't wait to write about the glistening poimals as they pulsate with the rhythmic thrust I've never understood when you see that people left for creative differences and stuff

but now that the first time i've seen it now i've experienced it i totally get it i'm excited for you guys to do this could you do the chair letter first please because i'm i'm having to do scheduled push breaks in my days what if the chair letter is a part of this no no what if it's a smutty little chair no you're never gonna get a chair they're two separate ideas okay these are very different and i support both so what's happening to your ass throughout the day it just it it really gets sore after about 45 minutes and so i tough it through but the bit that your ass touches is the only bit that's still there yeah but it's just not a lot of support and the cushion sucks i'd say that the bottom

the ass cushion was the worst part of the chair and it's all the chair that is at this right and when you have a back you're releasing putting some of that pressure on the back of the chair and relieving your butt from it so now it it's just pure, just pure hard butt down. It's just all butt down. And I, it really, I genuinely am taking tush breaks. I'm, I'm getting up, I'm laying down, I'm stretching out for a bit. It's very unpleasant.

You might want to consider waxing your butthole to make it more aerodynamic. Might be, might be a smoother sit. Should we get you a little tush timer? Like a little hourglass? I, I, it would be perfect don't think that should we get you a little tush timer like a little hourglass I I it would be perfect I think yeah I think two hour glasses and then I need to I need to rest do you know those little egg timers that are like little eggs or I have one that's a penguin over here on my desk somewhere that like countdown from you know you spin it it countdowns from

counts down from an hour or whatever should we make. Should we make little Andrew's butt timers that tell you every hour? It's Andrew's butt cheeks and it tells you every hour. It's time to get up and massage your butt. Move around. I think what we should do is write a letter to the church. We could do that too. That's what I think. I'm gonna be

leaving that due to creative differences. I already, I texted Jeff for the weekend and said, would you mind just doing this? Because I know it was said as a collaborative effort, but we, Eric and Gavin are not writing this. It's just, I was the one trying to get Jeff to do it this week. Right. And now we're back

from Montana. I can do it. You said you're leaving due to creative differences. Are you back on? I'm back on. He's back on. He's on back on he's back on he's back on okay hey gav thanks for being the only one brave enough to write this stuff with me it's not even a courage thing i think i would hold you guys back and i want it to be the best smut project that's such a cop out no it's true i that's an honest thing i'm serious all right we need to wrap up now this is that that

has to be that has to be it wait one second let me get let me get into my mind place one sec no i'm not capable of writing smut i'm not that's not for me well if you checked your mind place what is that coming out what is the alan i said as soon as the edit that they're currently on, I asked for them to prioritize that one to release it as soon as possible. Great. Half of that game is some lady in her mind place. Really fucking weird. That game is so good.

I went back and I replayed sections of it cause I wanted to take my time. I also, I just need to, even though like I've been around for so long, the actual let's let's play stuff is still new to me. I am so used to... I'm not used to having there be an editor for content like that.

So I need to remember... I'm kind of rushing when I'm playing, and I just need to remember, no, somebody is going to take the best parts of this out, and I need to be willing to explore. So it's a little bit of a learning process for me, because it's a completely different way to play a game.

You're not going to take a piss once in a let's play. You just filled the time. Gavin left for like three minutes and then I filled the entire time with content and then I realized like I don't need to do this. In fact, Gavin brought up the point the editor would probably hate that because like it's hard to tell on the sound form or whatever that that is the cuttable section yeah when i would edit let's play is any like blank area

of waveform is usually signified some sort of break and i would just go and it's done my dumb anxious ass is just filling for three minutes by myself talking without pause. It's the best editing trick where you convince yourself you've done work. Like I just edited two episodes of So Alright Today, and they start at like an hour and 10 minutes, and then they go down to 20 minutes. And most of that is me cutting seven minute chunks out where I'm just you can just hear me typing in the background, you know? Yeah. And every time I do it, I'm like, edit done.

Just made up 10 minutes shorter. All I'm doing is eliminating silence. But in my head, I'm like, edit, done. Just made it 10 minutes shorter. All I'm doing is eliminating silence, but in my head, I'm like, good job, Jeff. You did it. Yeah, that's great. Speaking of silence, we should wrap this up. Yeah, I better go and wash my asshole. Yeah, you better get it squeaky clean, bud.

Yep. I wonder if this is gonna affect my diverticulitis in any way. Oh my God. Do the outro and we'll start looking into it. Hey, thanks for listening to another episode of the F*** Face Podcast. Hopefully, you had a good time. Hopefully, you liked it a lot. Hopefully, you liked it so much that you're going to go to one of your friends who only watches people play video games on the Internet and say,

Hey, that's cool and all, but let's grow up a little bit. Let's listen. Let's do some theater of the mind. Let's hear some people talk. How about a f*** face? Also, if you don't want to grow up and be theater of the mind, we make video game content now. You can watch Let's Play.

Do that too, but mostly do this. Go, huh? And then listen. Bye. Hey, guys. And then listen. Bye. Hey guys, Major League Fan Jack here with a look at next week's episode of F*** Face. Can we make the perfect beanie? Gavin dongs again. And it is the question, and it is the answer.

Wait, who got waxed? Go to the happy baby yoga pose. And once again, Andrew does not eat the pencil. All that and more on next week's episode of F*** Face.