F**kface - Snake Closeness // Gavin vs Squirrels [58]

Episode Date: June 18, 2025

Geoff, Gavin and Andrew talk about false start, Oops all Erics, Geoff thoughts, living to 100, killing Nick, Squirrels bathroom, piss smell, coffee shops everywhere, Why?, bog roll whipping, Geoff's raccoons, hockey sticks, squirrel grill, playing hooky, best feelings, extra sleep, Labubuing, Snoopy Tamagotchi, childhood aesthetic, Makoko Monoco Labubu, Furby, portapotty prank, Gavin's on set medic, stopping a prank, and healing Gavin. Sponsored by Zocdoc. Go to Zocdoc.com/regulation and download the Zocdoc app to sign-up for FREE and book a top-rated doctor. Also sponsored by Shady Rays. Thanks, Shady Rays. Get 35% off polarized glasses at shadyrays.com - code REGULATION. Support us directly at https://www.patreon.com/TheRegulationPod Stay up to date, get exclusive supplemental content, and connect with other Regulation Listeners. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Whether it's a family member, friend or furry companion joining your summer road trip, enjoy the peace of mind that comes with Volvo's legendary safety. During Volvo Discover Days, enjoy limited time savings as you make plans to cruise through Muskoka or down Toronto's bustling streets. From now until June 30th, lease a 2025 Volvo XC60 from 1.74 percent and save up to four thousand dollars. Conditions apply. Visit your GTA Volvo retailer or go to Volvo cars.ca for full details. Hello and welcome to another episode of the Regulation Podcast. This is number 58. I'm Jeff. Got Eric, Andrew, Nick and Eric here with me as well.

The boys as they are to be referred to. Did I say Eric twice? Yeah, brother. I mean, boys, as they're to be referred to. Did I say Eric twice? Yeah. And I'm not even here. Hey, guy like me likes hearing his name, so just say it four times, man. Double Eric.

Happy to be here and happy to be here. Okay, what if we do this? What if we do this? Eric, at the end of this recording, you take my audio file and you re-record everything I said. Yeah. And then there'll be two Eric's in the episode and people have to figure out who was who. Yeah, that's a, I think they would know right away just from this conversation.

Yeah. It's probably short circuits. You just said, Hey Eric, do this. I would love to listen to a double Eric cut. Just see how it sounds. I think that would be the lowest listen to episode. They just be like too much of this guy. No thanks. You know, like, like Captain Crunch like like Captain Crunch oops all berries regulation oops all Eric's

Terrible Eric just plays every role in the podcast an endless echo chamber of this sucks Christ well that was a flawless beginning to the episode Very excited. Hey, I did something yesterday. I prepared something for you guys. I'm kind of jazzed about I went on as my first bike ride of the year really and I went on a bike ride in the way I used to back when we would do face and I would go for a ride and I would just try to write down Everything I saw on the bike ride and turn would just try to write down everything I saw on the Bike ride and turn that into like things Jeff saw on his bike Well, I did I did that and I prepared it for you guys and I'd love to share it with you if you'd like

Please use your ass to someone else's it was on my ass and I know I know intimately because of the Very particular pains that I have riding my bicycle long distances with my little ass First thing I thought about when I was on my bike ride doing I was just riding around town like looking for dead bodies, as you do now on town like because there's a new one about every three weeks. Haven't seen one yet, but I did see a bunch of cops milling around suspiciously. So who knows?

But I was riding around and I was looking at the swampy water waiting to find a hand or a foot floating. I got to thinking about what was the last time I saw a snake? And I think it was on the trail about three years ago, a snake drove and like drove, I guess drove, rode, walked, slithered in front of me from one side of the trail to the other. And it's scared the holy hell out of me, of course. And I got to thinking, I'm guaranteed

to see another snake in my lifetime, but I don't know when. So it's really kind of like that movie it follows. You know what I mean? Like every day I wake up, I'm closer to seeing my next snake. And I don't I don't know when or where, so there's nothing I can do to prepare about it. But also right now on this planet, there is a snake somewhere,

or the parents of a snake somewhere, who are making decisions that put them closer and closer to interacting and intersecting with me in my life at some point in the undefined future. And that thought terrifies me. But it's not a guarantee. Yeah, it's not. I think it's pretty guaranteed

that I'm gonna see a snake again in my future. When was the last one you saw? You think I'm gonna go the next 50 years? Like I just told you, dickhead, three years ago on the trail. That's how it opened. You think? No, you did just say that. That's how this whole started.

You played GTA? Did you just say you're gonna live for another 50 years? Oh, at least. I'm gonna hit 100 for sure. Hell yeah! Just like, spite is like a motivator and like you're just like writing it out. See, that's the thing. My family lives into their mid to late 90s and they do it without the spite that fuels me, right?

Like the spite thing is I think unique to me and my personality and my family. So I feel like I might also technology, things are advancing rapidly thanks to AI. I might eke out 150, who knows? Maybe we'll get to a point where I can download my consciousness into some sort of computer software and I'll just be eternal. But I do think that with modern medicine, I'm good for 100.

Maybe I'd like to top out at. I mean, I'd like to get to 150 if I could, but I'll be I'll be happy to hit the century mark. So I figure, you know, that's roughly 50 more years of life. I think about how many snakes I saw in the first 50 years, dozens and dozens, if not 100. Right. So there'll be there'll be some measure of snake in my future. And every day that I live puts me closer and closer to that snake.

And I don't like that. That's like twenty,700 more podcasts. I mean, assuming you guys live that long. That's a good point. You're not going to keep going without us? Well, you know what? We'll cross that bridge when we get to it. Who knows?

Who can say? Every episode of So Alright will just be, did I see a snake today? Didn't we talk about the podcast not going on if one of us dies, unless it's Andrew and he said it's fine if Nick isn't here? Oh, that's true. Oh yeah, what the fuck? That is true.

That's not at all what I said. That's literally the opposite of what I said. Oh yeah! Nick is so malleable. Not that you should be thrilled, Nick. I think I said that I would kill Nick because it would end the show. Because the scenario was if one of us died died if you had to kill one of us Or if we had the authority to kill somebody else in the group. Yeah, we all wanted Nick to live

We all said first Nick is most important to live and Andrew said nope. I'm gonna take him out first. Yeah, just so it would end Was that was that the stipulation that it would just you would kill him and it would end Well, yeah, cuz everyone agreed who is the most important? Yeah, that would be like Was that was that the stipulation that it would just you would kill him and it would end well Yeah, cuz everyone agreed who is the most important. Yeah, that would be like yeah the death knell for the show He's most important so you'd kill him. Yeah, that was the point This isn't the only podcast I've ever done you know there could be a mask again additional and different podcasts in the future Nick You can take the mask off Such a Jeff are you saying this potentially more than 2,700 podcasts in you? Oh, I would hope so

I don't think so I'll be happy if I get 27 more podcasts out of this body and this brain in this mouth I'll be happy if I get 27 more podcasts out of this body and this brain in this mouth Uh, but anyway, so that was my first thought was that uh, I'm essentially living in a snake follows Horror movie situation and there's next to nothing I can do about it Other than to move to a place with no snakes, but even then people import snakes, you know I've seen I've seen final destination weird shit happens if the universe wants to put a snake in front of me, it's going to put a fucking snake in front of me, no matter where I am. I could be on the International Space Station

and the universe could see fit to put a snake in front of me, if it wanted to. Last week I could have said, it's probably been a decade since I'd seen a snake, but I did see one this week. Really? A dead obliterated snake. Are you serious? Yeah, his head was all smashed up. Oh, thank God.

Where was it? It was right outside my house. It was probably coming to get you. Someone intervened. Somebody saved your life. That snake might have been that snake might have been hired. It might have been a snake assassin. It might have been minutes away from ending your life and somebody drove over it and

fucking. How would a snake get? would it come up a drain but it what was the easiest way to get in as a snake toilet Drain any hole it doesn't care Snake's gonna find a way in man toilet snake. Yeah I don't trust it. I don't trust a snake in space me I've got a different animal that's gotten what my my office bog has a ceiling full of squirrels. What? What? What? Excuse me?

What? Yeah. Whatever I'm shitting, I could hear him like eating the ceiling and like tearing up the insulation and stuff. Have you called anyone? No, no, I just. How long? Oh, it's been probably a month. I just. Oh, my God. I'm just throwing throwing a tissue box at the ceiling.

Every time I'm picking it up, I shut up. So it's done a month's worth of damage while you've sat on your ass doing nothing to stop it. Yeah, honestly, I thought the fact that they're already in. I just assumed the damage was unfathomable. They're probably all over the house. So rather than stop them, you do nothing. He's allowing them to advance. I threw a tissue box. I just told you.

I can I can send you a video of what it sounds like. I don't know how I'm going to do it without nitro. I also don't know how I'm going to find the video because my camera roll is full of blueprints pictures. Totally wrecked my camera roll. Once we get past this fascinating saga that I don't want to get off of anytime soon, I do have more bike stuff. Yeah, keep going.

Because there's still KMA just to find this. Well, I just want, I think Gavin should start redecorating for his squirrel bathroom in those pictures that I sent. Just go full squirrel, welcome them. Yeah. And this is, this is there. And then there's one squirrel with a plunger This is right. This is helpful. They're gonna. They're here to help. He's living reverse mousetrap You should start assigning them

Tasks to do around the house and chores. Yeah, they're just really good for it. You could hear how Violent they are with this the stuff up there. Well, they're probably really going for it. You can hear how violent they are with this the stuff up there Well, they're probably multiplying and oh my god, dude Yeah, are you gonna call somebody? Yeah, I Have a problem with with people in that No one ever calls me back or emails me back if I'm like, hey, I need a Electrician I'll send an email to like three companies and no one ever calls me back or emails me back if I'm like, hey, I need a electrician.

I'll send an email to like three companies and no one ever replies. Dude. Dude. I got my dishwasher fixed this morning before we started recording. It has been a four month saga, getting it fixed. Just because of getting people to return calls.

You are not wrong, Gav. It is a nightmare. It's impossible. It's demoralizing. I'm just thinking about your entire Rooster Teeth run and not on the emails you're required to. Awesome. Yeah, but these joyous people.

Well, karma, you know. Feel like we were not replying for different reasons. I feel like these people want the business. Oh, God damn, that's awesome. Oh, man. That's a valid point I've decided on my ride yesterday morning that Austin is officially a big city and You can mark it by the fact that at 730 in the morning the entire city smells like hot piss Everywhere I went was just

People pissing drunk people piss smells. Drunk people piss smells, unhoused people piss smells, runners can't hold it and pop off the trail piss smells. Everywhere you go in Austin in the morning on a humid morning smells like piss. So we are officially like, New York City smells like hot shit and piss. We don't have the shit smell, but we definitely are over indexing on piss this day,

which got me thinking. Right. I noticed in a meeting I was like, oh, fuck, people have pissed here. That's a lot. You take it for granted that we piss in toilets now. But for almost the entirety of recorded human history, it must have smelled worse than Austin smelled when I was riding my bike yesterday morning because piss and shit was everywhere. And we weren't clean and we had outhouses and then you would take all your piss and shit from under your bed and the bowls that you would hold it in it overnight and then you would throw it out the window onto the fucking street

down below in the morning and the canals would run with piss and shit. Until about 150 years ago, Earth must have smelled horrible. Humans must have constantly encountered the smell of acrid, stale piss everywhere they went. I assume it smelled like a zoo. Yeah. It must have, right? I mean, nothing was pissier than working downtown though, in Congress. Some of those alleyways.

Geez, like going from parking to the office. It's a shit obstacle course. Pissy alleyways are small city problems. It's when the piss makes its way to the to the main thoroughfares. That's when you know you've really. Or all this. Yeah, goddamn. I mean, like you're right. And think about like entire human history.

Everything is all outdoor. And then like the last hundred years, imagine somebody came to you and they're like, yeah, so that thing that's outside that you go and you fucking stink up like crazy We're gonna put that like connected to your bedroom It's gonna be inside your house now and then you just go you're gonna what huh? Like there's no way it made any sense the first time somebody pitched it, right? Yeah It's insane. It's weird humanity is did was disgusting until about a hundred It's weird. Humanity is it was disgusting until about one hundred and twenty five hundred fifty years ago, I'd say.

The next observation I had is that coffee shops in Austin are multiplying like gremlins. There is a new coffee shop on every corner of the city every week. It's fucking crazy. I know we're currently either done with filming Good Morning Gustavo or between seasons, so we're not going to them all. But goddamn, Eric, have you noticed this or is it just me? No, yeah, they're they're everywhere. A lot of new ones that I've never seen before just keep popping up. And I like again, I don't know.

This isn't a complaint. I think it's great to have more of that stuff. But boy, it feels like after covid, it was like ramping up. And then now it's like, hey, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go. It's a lot. It's breakneck right now. I probably saw four yesterday on my bike ride that didn't exist a month ago. I just like, yeah, every time you turn around, it's like tattoo shops were in the 90s, nearly 2000s here.

Do you think coffee shop owners have all colluded to try and keep Good Morning Gustavo going as long as possible? Yeah, they've tried, but we're gonna break them. I swear to God. We'll see. Then I had two other things from the bike ride. Well, sorry, before you move on, have you considered going to these coffee shops and asking why? Why? Hi. Hi. I was just riding my bike.

Why? Why? Why did you choose to do this? There there's a shop down the street. There's a shop across the street. Yeah. Why can see three coffee shops from the deck of your coffee shop? Why? Why? I think it's fair I'd love to know why it must be demand right because they're all fucking crowded Because you'll pay any amount of money for coffee. I

Think that's what it boils down to I would love to ask why in different shops and see if anyone actually answers a question Whether they would say why what? Maybe you should start doing that. It's. Whether they would say why what. Maybe you should start doing that. Just walk in and say why and then just see what they say? I think I should say, can I ask you a question first? So they expect something. Okay. Okay.

And they don't think I'm trying to order something. Okay. And then you just say, and then you just say why. Hi, can I ask you a question? Oh, wow. Are you the guy from Slow Mo Guys? Yeah, I'll be asking the questions around here. Why? And then they're flummoxed.

I like it. And they go, I'm so glad you asked. We are big believers in cheese, so we decided to open up an artisanal cheese shop that you have walked into. And it's our life passion passion making and selling different cheeses from the world. And this is why. I think potentially I could, as I say, why I could shrug my

shoulders a little bit with my hands pointed up and maybe just like gesture around at the ceiling and walls and stuff. That might help. I just I just imagine Gavin walk it. Like you don't have the guts. That's very exciting to hear. You don't have the guts. You don't have the fucking guts to do it.

But I really love the idea of Gavin walking in and saying, why? I'm scared to talk to anyone who I've known for less than six months. You're only just now sort of talking to my wife and it's mostly about the moon. And it's like, so I just, oh God, I would love to see this happen. You would have to be. We talked about the moon and pressure.

He's a month into getting up the courage to call about an infestation in his ceiling for Christ's sake. Oh, I posted the video. Do you want to listen to this video? Yes. If you give it just a second, I'm uploading it to Discord. Something that it seems like you could have done. I don't have Nitro.

Do I have Nitro? Yes, you have Nitro. Oh, hell yeah. Hey guys, check this out. I have Nitro. Wait, why don't you just get Nitro then? I would... I have to wait for you to give me permission. Okay, get Nitro. Okay. Oh My god

Oh Whippin dude, yeah, I throw a ball girl cuz it's just so loud. I can't concentrate I just wish anyone anywhere would return a call. Even we get the squirrels out my frickin ceiling. And that's not even not even my main squirrel problem. I've got them stuffing my frickin guys with my beard. Still, my whole grill is full of a squirrel nest is. Did I say to you this video from my grill? No, no, I'm going to keep filling for a bit.

I just said that you're, you said that your gutters are filled with your hair and now your grill is filled with squirrel stuff. Yeah. So the area that I shaved, uh, just put my beard down there and then the squirrels nick my beard and put it in my rain gauze. So now water just spills over them onto the door frames and stuff. Are you sure that's not birds? No, I mean, it's squirrels and birds. Oh, wow, changing his tune.

This is why they won't call you back, dude. Guys, like, sir, what is it it is it squirrels or is it birds? What do you want? What am I supposed to do here? The squirrels steal my Couch cushion stuffing and mix it with my beard and the birds just take the beard. Yeah, we had squirrel we have Same problem with squirrels ripping out our cushions The little fuckers man, they completely dismantled a floor mat outside. I think we've all been there before. Booking a doctor appointment can just feel so daunting.

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Check them out, baby. Vegas, baby. Swingers. Woo! Baby, woo! They could be your killers, Jeff. You know what? There was an update actually on the subreddit from a wildlife biologist who said, Jeff Serokiller, a wildlife biologist perspective, they said, I think he nailed it with raccoon. The first time he said he found a bird without a head, I was guessing raccoon. Why?

Because they're assholes. They're known to eat only the parts of things they kill and they'll kill even for fun This is by bleep-bloop 3008 But how birds you ask raccoons are nocturnal birds sleep at night sleeping birds are much easier to catch and then they tell a story About how they used to catch ducks in these traps so that they could tag them and sometimes raccoons will come along and see the ducks trapped in the cages and they'll just go snap their necks for fun.

Jesus! Oh my God. Yeah, and then somebody else in the comments was like, I'm pretty sure it's probably a cat. I really don't think so. I haven't, none of my neighbors have cats and I have never seen a cat in my yard. I feel like if there was that much murder going on in my yard

I would at least see the cat hanging out from time to time. I think that's it. you guys. Yeah, I mean when you showing this when we show when are we seeing your squirrel grill? Come on. It'll take me a bit. He's gonna scroll through blueprints drop Yeah, drop a couple blueprints photos in here to hold us over but he has to upload it to Eric so that then Eric can upload it to us On the trail yesterday I saw something quite shocking, if I'm being honest with you. On one end of the trail that I take, it's like an 11 mile loop essentially, or a 10 and a half mile loop, and on one end by the dam over on the east, far east side of Austin, there's a lot of crazy people on the trail because we're a big city now, we have big

city problems and there's a lot of like aggressive, crazy people. And so I'm always having to keep a lookout, right? Because a couple of months ago, there was a dude at Auditorium Shores and Zucker Park with a machete hacking people up. Oh, my God. I almost cut somebody's arm off and it was like a two in the afternoon. So I try to pay attention on my bike, you know, so I don't get macheted. And I saw a new one.

I saw a dude who looked like he lived on the trail, pretty wild-eyed, and he was walking around with, never seen this one before, a hockey stick as a weapon. And I thought, wow, this is the first time for everything. Like, I'd never even crossed my mind. We're not a big hockey town in Austin, you know? But with the excessive heat and no ice and stuff. And I've just never seen a hockey stick in the wild like that.

And I thought, wow, that's really interesting. You don't see that every day. Then an hour later on the exact opposite side of Town Lake, where over by Barton Springs, I ran into a dude, a different dude with a hockey stick walking the trail. What? I know, right? What is happening?

Does that mean there's some sort of a hockey rivalry going on? Like one guy's got like, this is my side of the trail, and the other guy's like, this is my side of the trail? Or is there some sort of a like crazy person hockey league, field hockey league that they're doing? Did somebody break into and steal a bunch of hockey equipment from an academy and it made its way down to the trail?

Like out of the blue, I've seen two hockey sticks to be used as, I assume, weapons on the trail on different, like these guys were six miles apart. You think it's viral marketing for the ice bats? Ice bats back? It could be viral marketing for our local hockey team, the Austin ice bats, but I don't think so. I think I think it's the weird.

I'd like let me know if you guys see any people out there swinging hockey sticks, because apparently it's a thing now. OK, that's nice. Eric, thank you for uploading Gavin's video, dude. Nope. Honestly, guy like me. No problem. I got that. All right. This is a three and a half minute video, which I assume we're not watching all of. We're in a grill. What are we looking at, Gavin? assume we're not watching all of. Yeah, we're in a grill.

What are we looking at, Gavin? I hear rattle on my grill. Oh my God. Oh, wait, wait, you have a camera inside your grill? Well, I went to grill something, right? And it was full of a bunch of twigs and sticks and my beard and the couch cushion. I scared the shit out of me. And I, you don't have to watch any more than that, but that's what that's the case. So I thought, oh, squirrels done this.

I'll put a camera in there. Can we put these on social media? These are very funny videos. Yeah, dude, I'm about I jumped a minute 45 in squirrels back looking. Oh, dude, he's like right at the camera. Oh, dude, he's attacking. Oh, oh, he's attacking the camera. He doesn't like the camera. Oh, and he's like right at the camera. Oh dude, he's attacking. Oh, oh, he's attacking the camera

He doesn't like the camera. Oh, and he puts his ass in the camera. Yeah, he's going at it. Dude, what the hell? I didn't remove the stuff cuz I thought maybe he's gonna put baby squirrels in there But he never did then this was like three months ago. Yeah, dude. This is crazy You know what you can do if you want to handle it real fast Just pop the top open throw some lighter fluid on that and light it Why would I use life live when I can just turn the grill on? Oh, I guess it is a gas grill I don't have a gas grill. I'm not a gas grill guy I tied a rag around the handle just to remind me not to turn it on without throwing that out first

to turn it on without throwing that out first. The the last thing I thought of on my bike ride, I wanted to I wanted to ask you guys a question. While I was riding around and I was watching, it was like maybe 715, 730 and I was downtown and everybody was going to work. They were like dudes with uncomfortable shoes You know like patent leather shoes with like thin socks and suits carrying briefcases and and everybody's very smartly dressed and nobody looks happy and their hair is all slick back or Clothed or whatever and they're all going into tall buildings to spend all day in the tall buildings and I was on my bicycle

and I got hit with the biggest wave of this nostalgic feeling of playing hooky. Like when I was 11 and you'd see all the grownups, you know, going about their day and you were like fucking free to do whatever you wanted to. And I'm, you know, 49 years old. Obviously, it's ridiculous. But the feeling was so palpable. It was like I was 12 years old again. And I got to thinking,

this is like the best fucking feeling in the world. The feeling of getting to play hooky, which made me think two things. One, I wanna propose something to you guys. I propose that one day a year, we get to call hooky. And then we all go do stuff together. We go to like a movie, or we all get online and play video games that we're not recording. Or we go for a bike ride or however we want to present it and do it.

Maybe we figure out a way that we're, you know, because we're not all in the same location that we can make it all work. But just one day a year we get to call hooky and we all get to play hooky together. I think that would be so fun. That's great. Yeah, like, oh, we're going to go to Six Flags today or whatever, you know. So we all get one hooky per year or something? I think it would just be one hooky for all of us. OK, but I'm open to five hookies because that's five times the fun, you know.

But the other thought I had was, what are the other best feelings in the world? Non-sexual, of course, not weird, but like that that feeling of hooky was so fun and it felt so good. And then I thought about how we celebrate five or one p.m. on a Friday because it's the best time of the week. So what are the other like best feelings in the world? I love the feeling of I'm having a very stressful dream about like an exam or some bullshit from my past. And then I wake up and it's not real.

Yeah, that's a good one. And I'm just like, oh, I don't even have to, I don't have to get up for anything. I don't have to go to school. I don't have to know algebra. When you have that list of a million small things you get done and you knock off like all of it, and then you sit down when it's done and you go,

I don't have to think that stuff that's just been taking a brain space for like Weeks it's all done and I don't ever have to think about any of that stuff again. It's done. It's all done Finishing that list is so nice. That's a great one Eric. That is a fucking great one for sure me similar to Gavin having a dream where you're trying to get home and you can't and like it's just you're struggling to like get there You're on the wrong bus or there's some big obstacle and then realizing you're in a dream and can just wake up and you'll be home Oh, it's good. Wake up all cozy in the bed. Yeah teleport. Yeah a good a good shit mmm Shit that's been real really sitting in here, making you uncomfortable for a while.

Blast out. Oh, uh, hell, you're talking about waking up from a dream or whatever. When you wake up in the middle of the night, not like a startle, whatever, you're just like, oh man, I got to go do this. I got to wake up at like a certain time or whatever. And you roll over and you look at the clock and it's like 3 10 a.m. And you're like, I don't have to be up for another four or five. like a certain time or whatever, and you roll over and you look at the clock and it's like 3, 10 a.m. And you're like, I don't have to be up for another four or five, like whatever it is. Like you just have that amount of time.

You think you only get 30 more minutes of sleep, you roll over, you see the time, you're like, I have six more hours to sleep. This is great. You roll back over, it's the best. It's the best. That can go the other way. That can be a negative.

I've had times where like I'll wake up and I'll feel like, oh, I'm awake. And then I'll realize, oh, I got five more hours of sleep or three more. I can sleep and then I'll wake up more tired somehow on the other end of the three hours than I did when I initially woke up. Oh, dude, I don't know what you mean. Whoa. Wow. I get that totally. I when I was like 13, I got an alarm clock and I

one night I woke up at like, I don't't know one in the morning to take a piss and I thought it was like four And I saw that it was only one and I was like, oh my god I get like five extra hours of sleep and that next morning I felt like I'd gotten double sleep So I started setting my alarm for like two one or two in the morning so that I could wake up Because I briefly thought that it would make me sleep better. Did not. Did not. I stopped doing it pretty quickly, but I probably did it like four days in a row.

Jeff, I did that for like two months. Did you really? Yeah. Mathematically, it made sense. Are you serious? You're not talking about just having a new kid. You actually did that. Yeah. I got an alarm for 1 a.m. Got extra sleep. I remember feeling so refreshed that day and being like, it like doubled my sleep somehow.

I got to try this again. And then I get every day it was like it didn't work last night. I don't know what I did differently. Nick calling it extra sleep is so creepy. Yeah. Well, I was thinking you enjoy, you know that good night sleep so much What if you did it twice in the same night exactly what if you did it five times? Yeah, what point does it become bad sleep? You'd be hibernating. Well sleep cycles almost like four hours Isn't it like a full one? I think so. So as long as you do four and four is this probably the same as getting eight?

I don't know how sleep works. I'm not sure anyone does. I think everyone's just shit with sleep. Yeah. Why do we even need to do it? It doesn't make any sense. Once again, my relationship to how I feel in the morning when I wake up bears no resemblance to what my aura ring tells me my sleep was like. Like I'm fucking exhausted and it's like, no dude, you had the best night of sleep of your life.

Or I wake up and I'm like, oh, I feel fucking great. Nope. You don't feel great at all You got a 72 percent sleep last night. You got a 20 percent drop off dickhead. Yeah, you wake up feeling refreshed It's like hey, what the what was going on with your heart last night? Jesus? Gavin if you could opt out of sleep entirely would you oh, yeah Big time. I take I take no pleasure in it. I want to teleport from night to morning. Oh, man, I love it. It's fun. The waking up is fun.

Yeah, but I just get I spent I waste so much time trying to sleep. That's fair. That's a good point. I like waking up and just events happened in the world and just being able to see like oh what's going on? What happened I was out. I wasn't present for a while It is nice that you when you go to sleep when you wake up, you know, reddit is refreshed a little bit Are you guys going to la boo-boo in this weekend no Okay, that's all the thing that happens every weekend now that I can't get Gavin to go with me and his wife and You going to Labooboo in this weekend? No. Okay.

That's the whole thing that happens every weekend now that I can't get Gavin to go. Me and his wife and Emily and whoever. Vanessa. I just. Kristen went last weekend. Do you go every week? I'm going this weekend and I went last weekend,

so I guess so. And it's just so that there's like an extra slot to buy something because they're limited per customer to get their little Monster things yeah purse charms or whatever they are. I just don't I just don't know how much time I want to dedicate to the latest Landfill craze yeah, I mean I mean zero is probably like the right amount. I don't know it's fun He's goofing around and hanging out and the worst lines the worst organized Sales you've ever seen in your entire life. It is amazing how bad some people are at stuff Is that your pitch is did you just?

There was free I got a free donut and some soda as well you did I got a free donut and some soda as well. You did get a donut. Pretty fancy donut. It was delicious. And I don't know, I just like hanging out with people, doing stuff, you know, something different. Hanging out. But I if I'm lining up with friends, I want I want to be excited about the thing I'm lining up for.

Dude, but they're so excited. I enjoy their enthusiasm, you know. Oh, I don't get like they're they're on cloud 9 They couldn't be happier They raced to the car to rip open the boxes and see what color their little fucking stuffed animal is and I don't know It's fun to watch them be happy and excited about stuff. I get into other people's joy Yeah, that's fair and it's only gonna last like another two weeks before they move on to something else. So I just enjoy it walls around

Yeah, I just uh Standing out in the heat for ages. Just I just feel like shit. Yeah We did spend a lot of time making fun of you specifically for not doing it If I was in control of a toy company it would be a like when Blockbuster could have bought Netflix for Labouboo with me because I don't get it. Like if somebody showed me Labouboo, I'd be like, we don't need to make these. Nobody wants these. It's the biggest toy craze ever. Yeah, honestly, skip this one.

Yeah, we just pass on this. I it is one of those things that it connects with people in a way that it doesn't with me. And I can't quite see it. But I find that in itself to be kind of fascinating and appealing, you know? Yeah, that's totally fair. Like they see something in that deal that I don't like. I don't think it's cute in the way they do, but they lose their fucking minds. Like, oh, my God. I don't like I don't think it's cute in the way they do, but they lose their fucking minds like oh my god

What Emily spends an hour a night? When she gets home from work watching tik-toks of Makoko whatever the fuck that is I don't I it's a little boo-boo It's the oh Boo-boo Makoko is is a little boo-boo. It is a little boo-boo Guys if you're listening to this, Makoko is a Labooboo. If you feel like you're having a stroke, you're not. Simply put, Makoko is a Labooboo. I'm pretty sure. The other one isn't a Labooboo, the one with the tail.

But the Makoko is, even though it's got the heart nose. But it's like the princess or the mom or the fairy or something. They're little elves, right? And the Makoko is one of them, but also elevated in some way I don't know. I've it's complicated I'm going throwback with some collectible stuff. This comes out in July peanuts Tamagotchi. Oh, that's so cool. Oh Isn't that awesome? I don't care about this at all I want it because the little NES looking graphics on the bottom where he's like it's Snoopy and then he's Safari Snoopy

and Pirate Snoopy and Joe Cool and all that stuff. I'm like dude I'm I'm dressing my Snoopy up. I can't wait for this thing. I'm bummed that Tamagotchi technology didn't really advance beyond its first few iterations. What do you want from it? Yeah, just look at it. That looks like 1994. I think that's part of the charm. I think that's the point. I like the NES. Yeah, I like the NES. If that was like high res Snoopies, I wouldn't be as interested as like the NES looking Snoopies.

Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. Like, look at that one on the way. He's like wearing like a little hat. And it's pretty exciting. He's like, man of little hat. It's pretty exciting. He's like man of mystery. That's new be There's something about How simple it looks that like taps into childhood for me? Like if it was cleaner or crisper like it wouldn't hit the same. There's something I

Yeah, childish about the way. I don't know. I've been a... I switched my Apple TV screensavers to Snoopy and I'm enjoying the Ultra HD Snoopy adventures that are happening on my telly. I gotta get an Apple TV just for that. I don't have Apple TV. I think I might have to get one just to watch the Snoopy screensavers and not subscribe to anything.

Do you have a watch? No. I guess I should switch to those. Are they entertaining? Oh, I love them. He's probably getting into all kinds of trouble. He's probably hanging out with Woodstock. He's probably flying around in his doghouse.

He's fighting the Red Baron dude. Stippy's trying to have a little kip on his doghouse and Woodstock's just pissing him off. Aww. It's great. I think at the end of the day though, you're just... The aesthetic of your childhood is forever imprinted on you, you know?

And so it'll always it'll always appeal to you. But I always do appreciate a remaster. Like if I'm going to go back and play Halo 2 now, I'm definitely playing with new graphics. Well, yeah, I'm not I'm not playing the old Oblivion, that's for sure. But like if if the screen saver The Snoopy screen saver was a Tamagotchi in a way where you have to feed him or die or whatever I would be into it yeah, did you think they're just I I think like playing a game like that would be fun, there's just the Nostalgia of giant head tiny body Snoopy that looks like little block graphics that I really enjoy

But I think I would enjoy the Apple TV screensavers just as much. I got to... Do I have to subscribe to anything to get that or can they just give it to me? No. But I tell you what though, we should just... I'll bring my Apple TV to the office and we can just put it on our telly. That's not good. Hang a TV next to Andrew's watchful eye and then I can just watch Snoopy screensavers. We can watch that instead of reruns of wipeout over and over again Yeah, just say look like dog shit

Dude, they look bad on our 90 inch TV Yes 86 yeah What Makoko is that what you said Jeff you're bringing up my cocoa or something. Yeah. Yeah in Expedition 33 there's a character named Monaco, which is not my cocoa. But I would absolutely buy a little booboo if it looked like that. Just a weird looking, one guy with a speed out. Yeah, he's got like a head mask thing.

But I've been I'm playing a lot of Expedition 33, and I brought this up to Gavin, and I want to bring up on the podcast so we could pressure him into doing this. But I encountered the number one villain in Gavin's heart in that game. There is a boss. My nemesis named Chromatic Aberration. I think I immediately texted Gavin is like, we need to make content where you cannot stop playing this until you defeat your enemy chromatic aberration.

There should be an Easter egg in that game where if you stumble across this boss and you start fighting him and then you go to the menu and settings and turn off chromatic aberration, he should just vanish from the game. That's so Kojima. They that's what Cocoa. They look different. I can I can tell you they're related. Honestly, the booboo looks like they would fit an expedition. Thirty three. There is kind of a

weird aesthetic to it. They make me sick. I think I'm with Gavin. What makes you sick? Is that how this disgusts me? Chromatic aberration or the stuffed animal? The little booboo. That's Makoko.

Oh, that's not a little booboo? Well, Makoko is a little booboo, yeah. Makoko is a little booboo, not like Monaco. Monaco knows chromatic aberration. Do you know how much that one I just posted cost? It's going to make me mad. just posted cost it's gonna make me mad So the the rub with the rub with Makoko as I understand it is that you cannot buy Makoko from pop Mart the store

You have to go to pop land the theme park in China to get it And so on stock X and stuff a little Makoko will run you about a hundred and eighty to two hundred Same size as the other ones by the way little And so on StockX and stuff, a Macoco will run you about $180 to $200. Oh my god. Jesus, dude. Yeah. Same size as the other ones, by the way. Little. Wow.

You don't fancy standing in line in China? Well, I do, but the plane ticket alone is going to be more than just paying the $150. Also, I don't want it. I just enjoy watching other people want it. Every journey I take leaves a lasting impact. Traveling the world only makes me realize just how much more there is to explore. No one builds a legacy by standing still. Start your journey at Remover.com. No Frills delivers. Get groceries delivered to your door from no frills with PC express.

Shop online and get $15 in PC optimum points on your first five orders. Shop now at nofrills.ca. Jeff was Marcus smart your Labooboo. Yeah. Yeah. Marcus smarts my Labooboo. Marcus Washington wizard smart is my little boo. I'm surprised Furby didn't do more Collabs. Mm-hmm. Why isn't there a little boo boo Furby? I Think if Furby existed in a time before collabs Yeah, it's a great point. It's a really good point He did plus I don't know Furby's big enough

Labouboo collabs with coke Really?'t know if Furby's big enough. Labooboo collabs with Coke. Really? Yeah, but Furby was hot shit. There was one Christmas where everyone was trying to get Furby. That's true. Yeah. There will be one year of everyone trying to get Labooboo. I thought he was holding a gun.

I thought that that was a rifle. I did not immediately register as a Coca-Cola bottle. I thought that that was a weapon. That's next year's collab with block That was it for my bike ride as quite the bike ride Yeah, yeah, we should do a group bike ride to see what adventures we all we should all just do a bike ride And then we'll all remember stuff and see if we remembered the same stuff from the trip Yeah, and keep your eyes out for hockey sticks because they're they're out there and dead bodies and snakes and dead bodies and snakes Yeah, I hope it's a long time before I see a snake. I do too for you

Have you seen these spongebob? Leboos what? Is that a real thing there's spongebob Leboos? Yeah, and they look nothing like the Leboos I don't understand how these are Leboos, but these are's Spongebob Labooboos? Yeah, and they look nothing like the Labooboos. I don't understand how these are Labooboos, but these are the Spongebob Labooboos. These are worse. These are so much worse. These are so much worse. I don't like looking at a single one of these things.

I don't like this at all. That Mr. Krabs is fucked up. That Mr. Krabs is fucked up. That Mr. Krabs is fucked up. Mr. Krabs in specific is disturbing. Mr. Krabs in specific is disturbing. And. Yes, SpongeBob, what the pumpkin is weird. Do you think the guy in the factory is like installing this injection mold plate

and just going like. Oh, hey, Gav, check it out. It's cave Bob Spongebob. We should do that. BMX track at GTA again. Okay. All right. I'd love to.

I'd absolutely love to. Hey, I, uh, I saw it to talk about a prank that I wanted to play on one of you guys But I've decided not to do it because I don't think it'd be worth the fallout But I would like to share the prank with you in case you want to play it on somebody else You know is this the thing that you said you didn't want to do because it would end a friendship I thought it might yeah, I don't know. I don't know how Yeah, I don't know if you guys are cool enough to live with a prank like this for a long time But some of this guy's I saw a take back of this dude He said if you ever want to really screw somebody over for the rest of their lives a friend of his

About two or three years ago wrote his in sharpie wrote his phone number Inside a porta potty and said send me pictures of your poop to this Damn it, and then he said for about two weeks, he just got the most heinous construction worker blowout shits and he couldn't do anything about it because each shit is coming from each text is coming from a different number. So there's no way to there's no way to block it. Right. But then, you know, the port-a-body gets moved from the site and it goes somewhere else. he says that the Shit texts would stop for a while. I'm like three months later

And then they'd go away for a while and then he would get him for like another month and for two years Just every once in a while whenever that porta potty is in rotation somewhere he just gets the worst shits known to man texted to him and You have no idea where the porta potty is it's always moving right so there's no way to find it and remove it so for the rest of the use of that porta potty he's just doomed to get shit nasty shit oh that's awful I was on a Bacardi commercial once that was like five days long and the medic kept sending me pictures of his wife's shits. What are you talking about?

What are you saying? What are you saying? His wife would text him her shits every day and he'd be like, oh, new one from the life. And I'd be like, God, damn dude. What are you talking about? Yes? I'm I'm like a guest at what you just said man like that That might be one of the craziest things ever heard what the fuck is it a cake talking about and I was like 18 maybe I was 19 it was I was just like why does this guy like me so much What do you think he wanted to do stuff with you no he was just

He was just It just just latched on to me at the beginning of the shoot. He kept talking to me I was like yeah being friendly at first and then the shits came in even they got real familiar real fast And then I was just like oh my god Did he ever stop or did you just have to look at those shits the entirety of the shoot? Oh, it was the whole shoot. The shoot. Oh, no. Never saw him again.

This is what I love about this podcast. Yeah. Oh, I throw out a tick tock I saw that's a funny prank. Gavin instantly has a real life story that trumps it by a thousand insane. Yeah. I don't know if you spent a lot of time on sets, but the medics are bored. They don't often do stuff. I mean, they're very important to have when something happens. Yeah. And they are just wiggling their thumbs all goddamn day.

They're also full of shit and very scared of ghosts apparently. It's the fucking medics that shut down our honor shoot because the lady saw an orb and it chased her to the woods a very real thing absolutely Yeah, yeah, I was a medic oh my god crazy crazy Have you ever tried to do a prank and somebody around you shut it down? Probably a lot. Yeah, probably a lot in achievement there. But but go on.

My most recent one, I was talking to somebody about someone that they don't talk to anymore. Like I just they had a falling out. They no longer speak. And they brought them up and they're not dead. But I just said, oh, yeah, they passed away recently. They're dead because I thought my head they're not dead. But I just said, oh yeah, they passed away recently. They're dead. Because I thought in my head they wouldn't know

and they would just think that this person was dead, that they were just shit talking. And that was funny to me. And I thought they'd just continue on their lives thinking that this person was dead, who's alive. And my partner was there in the conversation and immediately shut it down. It was, it said, no, no, there he's kidding.

He's fine. He's not dead. And I was like, oh, man, I really could have got him with that one. He definitely would have thought for quite a while until I probably told him that was a joke that that person was dead. I I I got a little too into setting people and stuff on fire for a while You're just an arson you went through an arson face you can't be setting people's shoes on fire anymore you got to stop That makes sense Gavin's not laughing because so much of his stuff got blown up. This turned into like the weirdest last five minutes.

Like, I'm like just kind of sitting here stunned by everything you guys are saying. I just can't like wild, wild, wild, the stuff that you're saying right now. Man. Oh, it's kind of weird. Andrew, guess who the first person was to get completely naked in the new office? That's a great question.

Oh. Who was it? My instincts, my guess would be Jeff, but I feel like that's too obvious. I'm gonna say Nick, cause he's the least I'd expect. Correct. Incredible guess. Incredible guess.

What happened Nick? I was at the office, setting up some audio equipment, and I also had to finish an episode edit. So I was setting that to export, and I was like, I got like 30 minutes to kill. So I drove nearby to go shoot some hoops and came back and I was like, well, I'm all sweaty,

but I have a change of clothes in the car. I was like, I do have a dinner plan, so I should probably not stink. So I used the shower in the office. I turned it on. The water came out brown and then, and then I settled in for a shower. Everything was fine and kept the door closed. We have a towel there. Did you buy shampoo?

No. He just rinsed off. I bought body wash. Did you find the shower M&Ms I left for Eric? Yeah, I took him out while I showered. Oh, okay. I put it back after it dried. Come on.

I'm scared now. I just would have been so disturbed if I showed up at the office and Nick was just completely stark as in the bathroom. I went to the office twice that day. I could have very easily run into him in the shower. That would have been the most confusing thing ever. The door has a lock guys.

It's not like I want the door open like, look at me. I randomly roam around the office as a robot. Like, if I saw you walk out with a towel, I would have been alarmed. That's crazy. Close into the bathroom. I knew you were there somewhere. I feel like if you hadn't have told me this story, I would have been so disturbed if I came into the office and I heard someone in the shower.

I would have thought someone broke in to take a shower. I sure as shit would have thought one of us was taking a shower there. It's insane. What do you mean? You took a shit the first day. I well, yeah, you got a shit. You got a shit work. You have to shower at work.

I'm not mad that you took the shower. I just think it's wild that it happened that fast. And also, I'm just kind of scared of that bathroom. Yeah, I couldn't figure out how to get hot water. It was very cold Oh, you got to go into the kitchen and take a shower in the fucking kitchen sink Just keep a basketball in your car Yeah, I keep a basketball in my car Andrew. We have the hottest milk coming out of the kitchen. So you gotta check it out It's awesome. Oh, it's milk. Is he said milk. Yeah, have you guys not seen how white it turns like milk? Oh

It's weird that the waters already boiling when it comes out of the God oh Could you get it so hot that it just comes out of steam That would be crazy. That would have helped the Gumbler. Yeah, could have. Yeah. We should put that out soon. I want to edit that one.

OK, edit it. Let's do it. Yeah, you're in the files. Yeah, nobody's stopping you. You can just edit whenever you want. We're scheduled out quite far. So, I mean, maybe we could. I don't at this point in this recording? Not really, not super far.

I'm worried the Gunpla will come out before this recording. It might. It could though. That'd be the goal. That's the goal? Yeah, why not? Jeff just said he was worried about it. But why? That's a good point. They've assuaged my concerns. I'm no longer worried.

Hey, problem solved, guys. That's teamwork for you. But why that's a good point they've assuaged my concerns. I'm no longer worried problem solve the ice That's teamwork for you With the gumpler being overseas at it for you oh Gavin I don't think I'm gonna take anything mmm. Okay. That's probably smart become property of the US government That's probably smart become property of the US government Does anybody know but now that we're past all that does anybody mind if I write their phone number in a porta potty and said Please text me pictures of your poops. Yeah, don't you don't do that. What about this? I'll go back to the cool sheet from 2007 I find that medics number Wow

Just text him text them some shit you just have to get rid of that zero put plus four four first Can you imagine if that's how the wife found out that he was having an affair somebody else's shits That is fucking funny. She's like oh is she sending you her shit Oh my god, dude. That is fucking funny. She's like, oh, is she sending you her shits too? Oh my god, she is. She recognized that it was her own making? Yes, yeah.

Better just not to cheat, I guess. Yeah. Keep those shits to yourself. I feel like these podcasts have healed me I felt pretty shitty at the beginning Where what's your percentage at now you were 70% earlier night, then you made it 75 Probably at 80 now. Okay, so you're almost where you were when we were hanging out yesterday Yeah, maybe if we did a like a gameplay after this I'd be fully healed I mean in the interest of healing you I'm willing to give it a try

Okay, then we have to wrap this up right shall we wrap up probably stop the podcast. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, we got to start wrapping up don't we yeah, but we're not stopping to go play a video game with Gavin We're stopping because it's the natural conclusion of the podcast. That's true. I feel like that's important to mention. This is where we all instinctively felt it was time to end and. I have a final suggestion. Okay. A little pitch for the group.

Oh yeah. No one will get back to me about getting squirrels out of my ceiling. What if we tackled it as a group? Go up what? Okay, get in the ceiling. No, I bet here's what we can do. We'll treat them like bacon bits. We'll get my We'll get my leaf blower up there. We'll try to blow Put me up there. Can you bring me over as the robot? Yeah, we up there and I'll around for you. I'll chase him out. I'll scurry him.

Now I can't speak for the quality of the the ceiling in there, but we'll try. Yeah. I love this idea. Put me in there. Also, do you guys think I should... you remember how when I layered all my P's together it sounded like Niagara Falls? Oh, I can replay it for you if you'd like. I remember when you did... No thanks. Yeah, you remember when I did that? Somebody in the comments recently suggested that I do that with my, uh, with shits and farts. Do you think I can make it sound like an atom bomb or like a- No, I don't want you to do it. Please don't do it. Thank you. It might sound like a track to starting. Oh, that's interesting.

Well, maybe I'll play around with it. It sounds like you have material for when we do the Foley thing. I've got a very particular way I'd like to do my Foley work. And all right, that'll do it. Oh, you know what? We should watch. I was thinking this the other day, too. We should all watch a trilogy together that none of us have ever seen before. Like, that might be hard to find a trilogy

that none of us have seen any of, but we should watch it in reverse. So each one is a prequel? Yeah, yeah. Cause everybody always starts off and they're like, I like the trilogy, but the first one was the best, and then it just kind of went downhill or whatever. What if you watch it in reverse, you feel differently?

What if we think the third one is the best because it's the first one we watched? Or if that's the case, what if the trilogy just gets better as we build? Could you imagine if someone had never seen the Matrix movies and watched them backwards? Oh man. It'd be amazing.

It'd be amazing. Or the Godfather, or any of that stuff, right? Something to think about. We just have to identify what that trilogy is. Wonder if that is one that none of us have seen. I mean, there's probably a lot of foreign language trilogies that none of us have seen. Definitely.

I'm gonna get, you know what? I've never seen any of the, what are they like, Air Force One, the one where Aaron Eckhart saves the president because his planes always crash. I've seen all this. Oh, I've never seen him. Oh, what about how many Riddick films are there? Seen in a couple of those, right? I've seen them. How many triple X films are there?

Seen them. Three of those seen them. Yeah, yeah, it's going to be hard. I've got so many open trilogies, but well, I guess there's something I guess we'll have to watch charmed first and then we'll get to this Motherfucker yep. Yep. All right, that'll probably do it for episode 58. Thank you so much for listening. We really enjoyed spending the last hour and five minutes or so with you. We hope to see you right back here in this very spot next week for episode 59 of the regulation podcast. It's going to blow your dick off.

Well, OK, it's a check out the Patreon. Hang on to your dicks. We'll see you next time. Bye bye. Bye. Bye.