Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade - Chris Rock

Episode Date: January 12, 2022

Slinging a bag of bricks, the bad boys of SNL, and heat vs fame with Chris Rock.  To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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What did you get to bed, bad hair? You know what I was saying the other day is there's a downside to COVID and no one thinks that. I know. I remember when I said, who is the guy who said, you know what? Is this COVID as a downside? Dana and I are doing this because I could pull them out, like pulling teeth to go to dinner which has to be within a quarter mile of his house.

And then we would talk and laugh, we told SNL stories and we have dinner with Neil and another guy from the show, we thought, there's so many people that watch us and let's try it. Let's just talk about it and bring in all the cast members or music or hosts and bullshit. Yeah. We could have called this inside baseball because it is, everyone has a variation on the theme so far of their experience.

Never forgetting it. But yeah, I was pretty demanding with restaurants. They had his quarter mile away, but one time you enticed me to Beverly Hills, and we sat near the kitchen and had to take pictures for half a hour. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that can happen to us. Hey, you know, with the owner of way, we think it's a pigeon's knife, which again, this

is not complaining, but the place we go is pretty mellow. I like it dark and quiet. I like when the bus point comes by, you know, a lot of people will help you at their level. Like he comes by and goes, hey, Joe dirt, I go, all right, and he goes, hey, I'm gonna give you some extra bread. And I go, all right, because that's nice of him. At his level, that's how he's helping. Hey man, I don't mind that because I was a bus boy

for three years in the holiday in. We call ourselves table maintenance personnel managers. Yeah, I was not a great bus boy. They always said, they had a big chart in the back. Lift with your legs. I'm like, I've never lifted my legs fucking once. Everything is across the table, and I have to lean over and pop my spine.

So you were a busboy too? Yeah, guy, I tried to be waiter and he goes, you don't got this stuff. I go, what stuff? This is harder. It took me six months. I was a dishwasher. I was a dishwasher.

That was the whole bar 3,000. I was just bleeding. I was a dishwasher. I was that that was the whole bar 3,000 I was just leading We had the cum sucker 8,000 I would eat the food I I ate right off the thing always in the back every I would watch people go don't finish that fucking steak Dude, so I'm gonna eat it. No, they were just thousands of plates and then the guy came back every 20 minutes my first shift You want to still do it? Yeah, I'm not going to quit because everyone would quit. You know, I got fired is because the guy goes,

don't be awake. You're not a waiter and they don't like when you talk to him. I go, but I'm like, you know, I'm sort of an upbeat guy. They go, I don't give a fuck. Deared the bus boy. So on a father's day, it was packed and we were selling shark. That was a special. This is an Arizona which is so gross.

And so I walk by the table and someone goes, how's the shark? I go, I got a motto. I don't eat them. They don't eat me. Can I talk to you? I go, fuck. So the manager goes, what did I just say? He was, what are you doing over there? I go, I don't know, killing. And he goes, no, you're not. I go, dude, I'm getting a plaza breaks. Hey, man, I waited on Rich little. I went back to he said, do Jimmy Stewart, I waited on Richard Pryor, I waited on Rich Little. I went back and said, Jimmy Stewart, I waited on Richard Pryor, I waited on Carl and I brought him a bowl of oatmeal and he goes, oatmeal, drop the O and you have at meal.

I said, give him a rest, okay? Give him a rest, there's no blue food. I gave Richard Pryor a dimper omelet, I came back to get the plane, he goes, whoever made this omelet, can suck my dick. And I never knew if it was a compliment or like, but I think he loved it. That sounds nice.

Well, Chris Rock is a good buddy of both of ours. I pretty tight with him. He's such a nice cool dude. He was in your team, your era. And, but to me, always seemed just, I sound kind of corny. Like an old soul. I just don't see Chris like in high school skipping around or something. No.

He had this wisdom about him and he has this skill set of distilling things to the essence. Yeah. Very quickly if you're around him and he gave me an incredible compliment once because I was a 93. I was I said, well, I guess I'm going to leave the show and he goes, leave the show. They're going to have to get like five guys to replace you. It's such a sweet thing, but that was Mike's first place. He's a smart guy, he's very nice down deep, he's not like a cool super.

Yeah, I think he's an honest guy, and we talk to him, he's very honest. He's like, you know, when he's off SNL and they ask about Lauren Michaels, and he says, the man gave me a job. Yeah, you know, when he's off SNL and they ask about Lauren Michaels and he says, the man gave me a job. Yeah. You know, there was never any complaining. No bit of an acid.

He got tired of it. Nothing. He's still one of my type, buddy. So let's see what he has to say. Let's see what he has to say. Hey, Rock, are you in that sweet pad I saw that was near where we ate? Yeah, I'm in that sweet pad. I tell you, when I go on tour, you can borrow it.

You can help me and stay out here. Rock said I could stay there. Hang on, Dana, I wet the bed, and so I said I shouldn't stay at his house because I feel embarrassed. You still wet the bed. I was a bed wetter. There's no way to get out of a wet bed with any dignity. What happened, dear?

But anyway, that's, we'll get to the childhood stuff in a minute, but Chris, a day off for you, not a family day, but a Chris day. Like it's gonna be totally off no emails. You're gonna have fun. Does that great Chris day include having to go on a podcast? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Because you know, you're you're You're profoundly I love the lady, but I really love Stay. I know. Yeah. So you had to do it. Right.

And I came in together. Yeah. Thank you, rock. You know, almost anything for data. But any. So, but you guys were the University who outdid the varsity, but we had a junior varsity team consisting of Farley, you Sandler, Schneider, and David. I mean it was an incredible junior varsity

team that was being trained to take over when we left in a way right no. It was, yeah, it's amazing that yeah, Farley, like Colby Bryant, came off the bench, people forget. Yeah, oh yeah, we do a show. We go, hey, how about this guy? Farley. We just like, Yeah, I don't even know what they hired us because normally they bring in the new people when the old people are, you know, you know, you know.

Yeah, not doing great. You guys were in rare form. I mean, that was, you know, that was the beginning of a 18, 20 person cast. When I came in, it was like basically four feature players or there were six total. And that was the beginning. And now there's like 21.

So it never went back to just five people being the cast right after that. No, I don't think so. Yeah. I went the other night. I couldn't believe how long the credit roll. I was like, Jim and Al Moura fell in love with us. On SNL, Pearl. I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know, Pearl, I'll know had a couple good ones, you know, Alec Baldwin's first show. And then when that summer came, we got picked up. And then that's when rock and barley came right, rock. Were you a full cast? Were you a feature player? Me and, yeah, me and barley got brought on together. We were the new guys that year. Yeah, so we were all together.

So we were all together. Yeah, so we got close to offices and we rock with people don't know because he's tough on TV. So I'm like, come off like a hard ass athlete. But rock is a nice person. And I was sort of out of my element from Arizona. And we gravitated just because we were kind of in over our heads, like everyone is there, I guess,

when they started. Yeah, I mean, well, you know, they always had that thing, it was the stand-ups and the improv guys. Yeah, yeah. And the improv guys were more technically prepared for the show, but the stand-up guys, because we write our own material and we live and die by the crowd, we were more I thought mentally prepared for the show.

Like, because the show, yeah, the show is... The children didn't kill. Yeah. Like, we could, you know, I mean, like, the standups I thought were less into the politics of who likes who, and who's close with Downing, and who's close with Lauren. That's like improv guys, because they're thinking, they're in a group thing, and stand like, Sandler, to come from writing on the show, and this by force of nature make himself,

the biggest cast member. I'm only a stand up could do some crazy shit like that. Yeah, I think I got on, I caught on a sailor. We always thought he was funny, but Chris, Dana, you, we all know great comedians that never pop or never make it. And I'm like, I watch a guy go, this guy's better than me and I probably make more, you know what I mean? They're just, they don't get discovered. when you see Sandler I think it was somewhere around crazy spoon head room like this fucking guy does not run out of ideas he does not stop and he just fucking crushes it's it's every week it was a new one I'm like god damn this guy's got it he would he would crawl around on all fours down the hallway I'd be in my

office and I'd hear a little knock about all, about all, and he would come in so gently and so quietly. But he wanted me to introduce opera man because he'd done it once and they didn't what, you know? So that I, from updates, somehow I introduced it and it was separate and he had a little stage. And that was the beginning. But when I first saw Sandler, his likability and charm, let's just talk about him first, that kill hate of yours.

Yeah, right. Hey, just sitting in a chair and leaning back, hey, I mean, it was like, whoa, you know what? And the girls liked him, let's face it. And then he's Adam Sandler, but. I was the original Pete Davidson. He was. You're right. But the original Pete Davidson he was

Yeah, he's a great comic, but I am fascinated by who he has sex with. I mean, that's a big part of my life following that thing At the show I guess I can say this without getting whatever let's get let's go and So you know, I'm at the Kim show by like Kim was Incredibly funny, right? Yeah, great. I'm just sitting back stage. I was like who's it gonna be? It's like, yeah, it's not me It's not me I'm like she probably met like Griffin already. It's like you know, maybe key this might be it It's sort of pushed to the front because Colin Joseph's marry. It just sort of gravitates.

Yeah, I do. And Colin's married. I was like, you'd be good though. Now, I'm more of a Chloe guy. I'm more of a Chloe guy. Well, the language starts like this. Aren't they're just friends? I'm friends with Kanye.

That would have been too weird. They always say they're just friends Then they say they enjoy each other's company They're hanging out, you know, you see the trajectory here at first I thought oh lovely people by the way So David is very charismatic as a person. I really see why women would like be he's funny He's cool. He's got a great voice He's really tall too. It's like

That many funny tall guys Tell Trump's most things. Yeah, most things rock. I have a question about when you did your first when you're first You have like questions prepared. Did you guys actually? Yeah, I'll care about you My goal was for you not to be bored, like, so you got an SNL and then bring the pain really blew up, right? Oh my God. You know what I mean? So I have questions for you that I'm actually curious,

like, is it for you hanging out? Yeah, but if you want us to ask about anything, let us know. I don't answer anything. I'm curious about if rock felt, if it was not fair, but I I did one weekend update in my first four shows and it scared the fuck out of me. We all weren't really actors. We hadn't done much. So Rocks for a show they were so salivating over rock

to come in and do all these sketches they couldn't do that I remember I think they overloaded you with so many okay I get a higher sketch especially yes I I almost like I've snore hadn't had a black cast member like nine years most people think I'm the black guy after Eddie I'm actually the black guy after David. And living color was killing it at this point. And there was like a bunch of whatever, SNL, so white articles or whatever. And then I got hired. So yeah, there was like this immediate thing where like, you're gonna do some Eddie Murphy stuff, right?

Like, I don't do any impressions. They brush off all the old stuff. A lot of pressure. You know, some any Murphy stuff, right? Like, I don't do any Impression. They brush off all the old, a lot of pressure. You know, the any Murphy stuff. Any Impression, I don't do any voices. You know what I mean? I do what I do. I mean, you know, but, so yeah, I guess there was pressure. You have to do act and you have to look at cute cards.

And, you know, just being in one sketch, you terrified all week or I was, and you have to inch your way in, and you were just being in one sketch you terrified all week or I was and you have to inch your way in and you were like hosting that first time because I remember you were in a lot of sketches they're pulling you every which way you have a million costume changes and the scariest one was I was a soldier and the Confederate soldier I don't know what the sketch was you were the first black general I'm frank and wrote it frank and he was fucking nothing. No one should have to work with Frank and never see her on the show never

That's what's getting out of his he's so tough. No, what are you doing? Okay, you've been on two years now you can work without break He's amazing guy, but you know little intimidating because he doesn't he's very blunt Oh, that wasn't very funny. You know, you have to get used to that He's the white Lou Gossett junior from office in the field What you gonna do mayonnaise was it that Rock but was it weird because if I didn't really think about that way, but in living killer is doing great,

you must feel like you're almost stuck on SNL because it's like fuck. I should be on that. I mean, I loved it and I loved you guys, but it was a weird, and I'm sure Jackie Robinson used to go to Harlem after the fucking games with the Dodgers and shit. It's like shit's happening uptown.

Why am I here with P.W. Reese? P.W. Reese. Good reference. When you went on in Living Color, you finally went on there. Did you, was it fun or was it not fun at that time? No, but I finally got to the Wains Recon, Keenan Recon, I was like, I don't even know

what the hell I was on, I was on. But I guess what, I got to work with Jim Carrey and Jamie Foxx was there. All of that SNL and living color, it was just for me to make friends and to kind of learn about writing and writing on a deadline. All of that was just training. And I was supposed to do stand up.

It's like God. It's a humbling boot camp that just reminds you that everyone got there because they were good and then you immediately shit on. And you're not even, it's like a wake up call. Oh fuck. Everyone's good. I'm not the first guy to like maybe, you know,

the show wasn't perfect for me, but You know Julia Louise drivers Stiller, you know, yeah, like a lot of people that Jim Carrey I audition with Jim Carrey, you know, I mean, and I thought well They got a pick Jim Carrey guys insane, but killed on in live in color I audition the night audition I'm not new in several audition. We're at the Chicago improv and Dana goal was so good. No, well, I left your audition. Yeah

I mean, I'm a sad guy. Yeah. I like, okay, this is over. This guy, smart, funny. Smart, funny, like whatever. Like this guy so much better than me. I am out of my league and I left. And later that night, Lauren, you know, whatever found out with hotel I was in and told me to come downstairs

and basically tell me to add a show. I didn't even like that's how good Dana Cool was. Like let me get the fuck out of here because I'm wasting my time. I think with Lauren, it's like almost a sports analogy or something. He's looking at people can play well together a little bit. No, I actually I asked him that in reference to Dana Cool and it is not like Dana's't have a great career writing on a Simpson This fucking great great special the whole thing Lauren said the thing I Yeah, I said what did you see in us?

But I was like wouldn't see me in salmon because we both were like what the fuck we do here? Mm-hmm, and he said Well, you guys have original thoughts? Yeah, that's a big thing is writing. They always look right and they don't think that. We both have like a joke somewhere that he hadn't heard before. And that's why he hired us. What would be like, at that time, didn't Sandler have the thing about

who's guarding World Chamberlain? The World Chamber thinks we're the greatest. Yeah's guarding will Chamberlain who's the little Chamberlain things were the greatest yeah For people for people's comedy. Do you want to be an NFT explain that? It was so original and so funny, but I want to know what your signature thing you might have or your go to Your go your most surefire bit, bit you know I had a bit about going to an abortion rally to meet women that I knew were fucking I remember that that was pretty radical that was right in 1989 yeah Well, Rock came came with more hype than Sandler, I think. I think rock when I got there, everyone was telling me, and I also heard a lot of hype

about Barley. And then we knew Sandler from the Valley. So me Schneider and maybe Dennis, maybe Dana were helping and saying, Sandler's funny. He came soon after. But it was we're like, first, you know, you can tell if people had game and sometimes you can just tell around the office, you can tell it read through, but I definitely was looking around that place going, everyone's great. It's on, I mean, when you go down to, I go, Jack Handy.

Yeah, those are the school of comedy. Talk about original thoughts. Every Jack Handy sketch, I'm in read through going, you're fucking shitting me. I should quit the business. I don't even know what I'm doing He would hit the the weirdest ideas. Yeah I remember Mike Myers just shit that didn't get on. I still remember it's in this day I've mentioned to people that asked me about all the greatest cast whatever and I mentioned specifically 90 to 93 because oh every there were too many cylinders firing

and you'd have a toons as the cat or Myers-Duce Prokets. You do NADACs, David do this. Sandler, you guys were coming up and getting a fan following. I think those three years was like, sometimes I'd sit back and go, man, that show kicked ass. Because they got the overlap. They got you guys and we're coming up and it's passing.

And then you guys all leave and then it's just us but yeah we have feel we had Jan we had you know it's just like that was a wild wild time yeah yeah I was a insane I learned I learned more there than I learned to dig you know the other time and good people you know rock your friends with Kanye is he crazy? I do say eccentric because Kanye I think is so Smart like and maybe that Elon Musk way or something cuz he's so good at what he does And make you fit in What Kanye I always though is he worth it and I was like so far I always though is he worth it and I was like so far As a friend or just as as a artist

Is this true and I would I love that if it is true, but I think he had a prominent SNL With a sketch or something or music thing obviously and the one technical issues the said he said Apparently he said you don't understand. I'm Stanley Kubrick So I thought to me Stanley Kubrick is like, you know But to reference, to reference, I'm Stanley Cooperick. You're like in the world of rap. Yeah. That's an NCF.

I'm Stanley Cooperick. Compared to young MC, yes, he is trying to stay like Cooperick. Well, you know, my kids turn me on to hip hop and rap. Now I love it, but it took me a while. But now it's gone to porn rap, which is very interesting. I can't always... It's gotta go. You gotta meet the two.

They gotta meet at some point. It was inevitable. Yeah. It made total sense when it happened. Cardi B was on the Super Bowl commercial mic, and I did. Couldn't have been sweeter and just gentle, you know, and I wasn't that familiar with their music, but meeting her and then hearing WAP, it's like,

okay, I got it, I got it. You know, it's really funny about Party Beat. A friend of mine turned me on to her years ago, just from her Instagram feed, and I kind of, I tried to get her a deal at Comedy Central, do a show, like a comedy show. Because she's funny. I thought, I'd never heard one rap,

she hadn't, wasn't even rapping or whatever at the time. I was like, this girl's funnier than everybody. Yeah, you know what's interesting? You told me that about Nicki Minaj years and years ago, I didn't know who Nicki Minaj was and you go, I said something about her and you go, actually she's really funny. She's got a great personality.

And that was the first of me going, oh really, I like that you look at it with those eyes because sometimes I look at, I can't help it when I meet women or not that you were dating them. But when you just meet women, that sort of easy, funny thing that comes out of them is always really a great quality because they don't try to be like Robin Williams. They're just, they're a funny personality, I love it. Wow, you know, you're handsome guy, David, so you think you have a chance. I don't think I have a chance. You're the good looking guy.

Whenever we go out, they like rock better. I'm actually like, okay. They always go, why aren't you Chris Rock? And I go, I can't be. Don't you get more handsome than ever, Chris? Don't you get that? Oh, thank you. It's not like you're aging horribly. I'll just

say that you're, you're very brave. Wow. He looks cooler when he gets old. Yeah. I finally back and have the mind here. I'm in good shape. The neck is not happy with this age, but this is pretty good. I loot you lose volume in your face and you kind of, your face recedes into your skull. So you need glasses. You need if this is something Jerry Simon fell will do eventually but Can I do you want to try ask you kind of often kill to kill I'm named dropping. Oh, did you have dinner with you guys last time from me?

Jerry Collins just what the fuck? guys last time from me Jerry Collins just what the fuck uh Plumma Cartney good good Giles theory Jimmy Fallon J.R. Did they shut down the restaurant or what the fuck and uh ZZ's and sorry which cheesecake factory so Palma Cartney goes you know I'd like something you know a little suds you on the top and Jerry Exactly Sorry, go ahead

I just I was a speeding data I Do Jerry Seinfeld as a serial killer because I don't think Jerry has two gears and Fallon does this one gear But sometimes Jerry goes when he did his president bit, someone wanting to be president. I think I'm just the right guy for that thing. I think I could do president. He has that doobie doobie doobie. So I do him as a serial killer. I'm just gonna go in, cut you a spleen, go down the living, do the thing, blah blah blah blah. Anyway, sorry. I could do Paul McCartney.

Killed. Killed. Killed. So what do you like? Anyway, sorry, I can do Paul McCartney killed killed killed so what do you like? So when you're in that situation with those people you just look at the table and kind of go I belong right I mean you're chill. I mean you feel that situation right now we're all pretty accomplished just three. Yeah yeah I mean, hey nobody looks at Paul McCartney goes. I should be here. How you doing? My equal. He's, there's no one like me. Jerry, but, uh, you know, through lots of therapy, yeah, I can kind of relax doing this. But what cartney seems like he likes to hang out. Funny people also get a pass. They like little court gestures around. I've been invited to shit out of most

ecuriosity factor. They just go, spade, go, keep things moving. I'm like, beep, beep, beep, beep, you know what I mean? They like that. They're going to say something funny. You're enough, David. You don't have to be a gesture. You're enough. I just got the results back. I have to be. They told me. My therapist told me. ¡Adiós, mía! Yo he visto las razones de la verdad, me tengo que hablar. Mi therapists me lo he visto. recomendaciones personalizadas para mejorar el contenido de tus correos electrónicos, segmentar tu público, entre muchas cosas más adivina menos y vende más con Intuitimale Sim. La marca número 1 en Emilio y Marketing y Automatización. Empiezad hoy mismo en MailSimple.com.

Vas a vender a tus públicos de marcas competidoras en número globales de clientes en 2020-2222. So Chris, so I went into therapy with Conan's therapist. I piggybacked on his therapist at five, I was in it for five years. What? So you went through it intensely, right? So what's the headline? What's the takeaway for you? Mine was is that I have a hard time taking care of myself.

I'm always trying to help other people. That'd be one of them. I bought a guitar for my nephew, a really nice guitar, and then I had a hard time buying myself a guitar, and I have a lot of money. And I said, God, I'm sick. So I'll, yeah, I mean, honestly, this apartment is probably the first real purchase.

I've made for myself in about 28 years. Right. Since I got that Corvette. Foot. Oh, that's an L. That's an L. Like, like life changing purchase. Like. And so what was that? Yeah, I know what you mean. Like, yeah, always doing for other people. Mm-hmm. I don't know. What I've learned in therapy is like, childhood trauma is like some real shit. For real.

And you gotta, until you deal with all your childhood shit, you're not, you're just, you're not, nothing's gonna work out for you. You gotta, you gotta start at the beginning. It's like work it on a script, okay? Page one. So when I met you, you were a young man, but you... Well, you were a young man.

Were you ever kind of like snarky and spoiled in high school because by the time I met you, you seemed kind of like this guy. At least in maturity, you weren't bitter, you weren't snarky, you weren't ever in a group with comedians kind of shitting on some other comedian. So I noticed that attitude you had as a young man, but I guess the childhood stuff for me,

it was like I had a lot of anger, and it was in my standup, it was in my characters. And once in a while I'd go off on any kind of authority figure that turned into my dad, but I got past that, but how did your anger express itself then to you? I mean, here's the weird thing. When I was, I mean, my child, I was bullied ridiculously,

half of it, the bullying, because I was just a little guy. And then I got busted school, so I got, I was a little guy and I was black, right? It's hard, so it's like, I'm getting double bullied. I would, if I was white, I would have probably got bullied too, but it was just like, I was supposed to be tough. Probably. Yeah, it was pretty rough right and it was

Pretty like every day So I it's weird. I had a weird temper. I'm gonna be a weird thing. I was the oldest of seven and And I was weird we smaller than my younger brothers so It was a weird thing where your brothers and like, hey, so and so down the block bothered me and I'm like, I gotta fucking go protect on. Oh, Andrea, I told you. Yeah. Wow. And I'm fucking smaller than them. So, you know, one day a guy, a guy really disrespecting me really bad, like mush me out of party and like mush me

and push like kind of like cheek sand on my face in front of the house and shit. And I went home, I put a brick in a book bag. This is like a legendary story in my book. Like bad boys, yeah. And I fucking swung that shit and smack this guy in the face with this brick and then stomped him Joe Pesci style. Wow. Now to the point, we thought he might die for like even like three days later every time

a cop or whatever would come through the block and be like we're literally talking about ways of getting me to bounce south like that would have helped. Huh. Long story short, from that day on, as my shrink puts it to me, you have been scared to be angry ever since. So the guy you saw was bending over backwards to be nice that I was so scared of man. Yeah, I see.

Yeah, all right. Right in the of what, you know, my strength, my good, the good strength I got, you know, like the top, top guy. There's good ones and bad ones, definitely. There's good ones and bad ones, this is, you know, and he broke it down. It's like we got to get you over that incident.

Right. Because you're a nice guy, and this guy brought out something in you, and you're so scared of that thing coming out of you again, that you let the whole world walk over. Your friends walk over, your family walks over you, your female relationships like everybody just fuck you over. Because it's somewhere in there they know you, there's a force to hold and you back.

Interesting. So, in the wind, I'm like the opposite of you. In the sense that in the last year, now I can get a, right. I'm not scared. I'm not scared of letting people know how I feel about certain things. That my therapy was about that too though, because I was always the nice guy holding stuff in and not really, my aggression, my competitiveness overrode the nice guy, because people will ask me, who meet me now, well, did you just allow other cast, like, oh no, Lauren, do their sketch? That kind of thing. There was a natural competition in me,

but in my personal relationships, I hated confrontation, because when confrontation happened in my house, bodies flew, my dad was just really violent. So I, all my siblings are like that. We don't like confrontation. Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no like confrontation. Yeah, no, that's not my question, too. It wasn't violent, per se, but it was loud as fuck. Yeah. So, but those things stick with you, just loud. Yeah, it just sticks with you. So now, yeah, I can kind of,

I can tell you, um, hey, I didn't like what you said to me or I didn't like what you, without losing my head, without getting anybody, that's a home run for therapy. Let me ask you a question. So this apartment, I can't see much of it. So it was a mental leap for you to buy this for yourself. It yes, because you were frugal too in a way, right? You're always, you wouldn't be the guy would spend or the heel.

I would say your best manager or agent is a low monthly nut. That is like, right. You don't want to be doing the fifth lead on you know. Yeah, you can keep a low monthly nut chances are your career will be make good choices. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You don't have to say yet. There's meetings you don't even have to take. Yeah. When the cameo guy calls you up, you don't like it. They call it fuck you money in the 80s and I guess that's what it is.

Like, or now it's just no thank you, no thank you. Yeah, yeah, no thank you. Yeah, when you said you were married and you go, I think it's me, Rack, that are you scared? She's gonna take 50% and you go 50. It's 80 now. And like, you don't buy yourself much when you're married. Didn't we have that conversation at the 40th backstage?

What do we have? I thought it was the worst. There's so much there, you're talking about the divorce and you said, well, it's half and, you know, I just mentioned that other people I'd known in the business and they go, well, it's half of, you know, community property and then the alimony adds up to more like 60, 70%. It's about 70, yeah. Okay, it's about 70%. Which is fair.

I'm kidding. That's insane. I always say my ex-wife has made more money off of comedy than Robert Townsend. You know what I mean? I'm the only comedian that has to drive a cab at night. I'm gonna change that to Uber, just like I know. I'm gonna change that to Uber, just like I know. I'm gonna change that to Uber, just like I know. What kind of choices are you making now as far as girlfriends and stuff are dating or like how are you and just therapies and forming?

All of that and I think women generally do like when someone's straight forward, you know, yeah, I mean Wow, I'm just not as desperate as I'm in the past Okay, you know just you know me like I'm just not like that thing where it's like, oh my God, I can't believe someone's paying attention to me and then, you know, you're in this weird, lopsided thing where you both, you both have one thing in common, you adore her. Okay, here's the quote, I want you guys both to comment

on this quote, Just comment on it. Okay, whether it's true or not, men want to be admired and women want to be loved by a man they admire. It's pretty accurate, I guess. I mean, I don't mean want to be admired by who? The woman in that life. By peers. Well, that's it. Yeah. I mean, like when I make the special or whatever, you only think people I care about is like

you guys. That's right. I'm so funny. I'm not even comedians. Just comedians, I think they're funny. Yeah, I know what you mean The rest I can and we know we were in the tribe We know what like when we see you on stage

Well, I always love how you have the cord and the way you move and you're all dressed up And you look great the crowds going crazy and you're just hammering it I know what work went into that I'm like, fuck. You know, and then to throw it all away and just be connected to it. Like I was really curious about this particular line you had, these anthems.

And one was, a man's only as faithful as his options, which it seems like it was just hanging around but it became quotable with my friends. It's not whether it's absolutely true but it's just a very funny, astute observation. It's pretty true. I don't think I've came up with it. I think like one of my uncles said it to me. Well, that's coming up with it.

And I shoved it in a joke. But that's coming up with it. You know, noticing it and I think I can use that. Yeah. But yeah, that one follows I think I can use that. Yeah. Yeah. But. Yeah, that one follows me everywhere. Really? Oh, good. Good and bad, you know.

Oh. It's like everybody. Little too close with first. Yeah, it's like any girl you date, it's like, man, it's only your sweetest options. You know, like, he's there, they're like, sir, you out of options? You're like, hmm. Yeah. I mean, hey, make yourself.

Take it from the corner. I had it. Well, isn't that special. I can't get away from it. No, I can't. Rock, what are the three top things that people on the street know you for? I know. They know it for it's weird. It's like especially because of YouTube. Yeah, they'll even know hold specials They just know jokes about this or that You know what I mean? Yeah, it's like like specials end up becoming mixed together and some love sure They don't just go that joke you told this joke. Yeah, yeah, there's a lot of I just go that joke, you told this joke, yeah. Yeah, there's a lot of, I got a guess. I got a guess.

I got a guess. I was on a, I get a lot of open wintersy when I have to bring the pink. I remember that. So there's a certain amount, if you'd be amazed at the housewives that are the, you know, they're into that, know what I do.

But I mean, it's not a synnel anymore. It's more movies here. There's I don't know. I'm like, I don't know. It's like, remember, we were kids and they just see, I don't know, I'm trying to think certain people were just famous and you couldn't even figure out why. Yeah. You're like, why is Charlie?

You know, it was hard for me to realize him. When people were recognizing me, I thought, oh, it was so great until I heard one person say, oh, I know that guy, he sucks. And I'm like, oh, it doesn't mean they like me. It just means they know who I am. They just know you. I mean, I'll tell you this, they're grown-ups.

It's fine. Yeah, grown-ups is a big one. You're right, you're right. I don't want to say I guess. Any young person, my God, grown-ups. We're keeping the lights on at TBS, I'll tell you, because it's on like, yeah, TBS, heavy rotation. Plays grown-ups literally all the time.

One and two and two. You know what question I got which you guys might not like in my last interview, they go, when were you the most famous? And I know what he means. And I said, the real answer is right now because everything's accumulation. And then they've seen. Well, there's fame and then there's heat. There's hot where the phones ring.

Exactly. So I could tell when I was hot. But yeah. I'm more famous now than I've ever been. But in around, me and Chappelle always let joke about it. I always go, yeah, back when I was Drake. That's like, yeah, drink them up. 2002, for, I was Drake, you know, whatever,

from 96 to about 2000. It's like the fourth year for a special in a row. It was like four special in a row. All the straight like. Yeah. Yeah, I'm not there's no million dollar nights now, but you are. Those are you.

Well, Bill Burr, I don't know, what did he get? No, no, no, Bill Burr. Please, Bill Burr's. Yeah, if you get to Madison Square Garden You're doing a ring is yeah Sebastian does to Sebastian does two shows a night at a race Unreal that's unreal. Yeah, I love that guy Really stood out for me. I mean in the last five years as just funnier

You especially you go watch him at the store, you can't not laugh. Oh, I was in the back of the store and just going, oh my god, who the fuck is this guy? And then I come in the next time I sell his name, I go in and watch. With the funny thing now to me is when people were playing like Madison Square Garden, like I think you've played at Chris,

there's these big places you hear of like, in Boston, TD Gardens, whatever it's called. There's so many big ones, the forum. It used to be reserved for like Eddie Murphy maybe and maybe someone else. And now when you hear people that aren't even household names, to me, and you go, this guy's playing this, you go,

whoa, this is a whole new world where through a podcast, it's through YouTuber, through their specials, where it is a little under the radar, but they have a crowd that comes out. It's, it's, it's pretty shunned. Well, I think the exposure and social media and everything else, they become friends with you. So it's kind of like your friend, nobody is playing Master Square Garden. You know? Yeah, and also I think there's more. I know in Europe and around the world, they all plays respected stand-up as a high art, but in America, it's the stand-ups of becoming the real art. It's called, because in music, music's become a producer's medium.

So there's not a lot of singer songwriting. There's not a lot of, no one gives a fuck about whinernifts anymore. So the people that actually think are the comedians. And I mean, like, so there's kind of a big thing. Is your right-year-own stuff, which is hard to do yeah, it's like you know Hey, I love Rihanna Tom Saguara as a better artist. You know me writes all the rights he writes

All of this stuff, you know, nothing really. It was great. She's amazing. Yeah But you know in the in tradition, the nerdy tradition of coming up with your own stuff. Would you rather date Rihanna or Tom Sagora, be honest? I would rather date Rihanna. I would watch. Tom Sagore is a great example of someone that does,

I won't say numbers, but he does a podcast. And then I ran in and he goes, we do these live ones. So he makes a shit load off his regular podcast. And then it's a live one, and it's crazy where I go, you do not make that in three-hour podcast. He's like, yeah. And then he goes, next one we did, it doubled, I was like, I don't know. I'm sorry.

Yeah, his podcast was great. And that's an example of that, where I often thought when the web first came out, why couldn't I, could i get a million people to pay me a dollar a month and i'll just go apes it on youtube and that's starting to happen a little bit worth some of it i don't know tom's numbers but i would guess if you charge is ten bucks and he gets fifty thousand people on his live youtube little podcast he's making

a half million yeah i mean i'll understand too. Like, I'm gonna get too technical. Humans need people to talk, right? So whatever, 100 years ago, 50 years ago, philosophers used to be famous. There's no more fucking blossom. People used to be religious and went to a church every week.

No one goes to church any more. So the only place people actually can hear people say their thoughts is through stand-up. It's really how it takes you. Where's the last, the last of the speakers. And I mean, the last of the thinkers. Can you see some of these preachers, by the way, the speakers. And I mean, the last of the thinkers. Can you see some of these preachers, by the way, are similar. They walk the stage.

They're talking, they're rallying people. They're talking to Emma Zingewitt. When I'm writing this material, I watch preachers just as much that I write, watch standups. Really? It's interesting. You come off a little bit like that.

You work the stage you're like a pantomac. Well my grandpa was a preacher my great-grandpa like all I have preachers in my family line. Well you see their performers that what works it works for them they're loud they give it to them. They find a premise they milk it. Yeah I would my my two sons were doing stand up and they had the main problem. So I was around open-micres a lot. And the main thing was lack of clarity in the setup. So I actually put you on one of your specials.

I said, look at this guy's language, this clarity of really digging into the premise. Everyone knows where he is and then he drops the hammer. So, you know, that makes sense to me. And obviously Sam Kenison was a preacher. You can really see that. You know, you might not. Yeah, we're doing it the best. The hardest guy to follow.

I followed him once. The hardest guy to follow. Ever. I auditioned for Saturday Night Live and followed him as an unknown and 84 at the comedy store. Would know him see him between. Sam levitates the room and now Danof Clarko. Death!

Death! I have no way out. There was nowhere to go man. So Chris, as far as just fun and stand up, how much do you, what size room and what's the situation? Like, for me, in a small room where I've got a no pad and I have some bits and I'm trying out new stuff, that is the most pure fun for me as far as stand up. I mean, it's weird. I start next week or the week after I go to it.

I'm not going to say where, because I don't know when this is airing, but I'm playing a club in Knights of the Row, in the middle of America, doing two shows a night, trying to get a act together so I can go on tour next year. That is fun. Once you get enough bits in... That are working. I mean, isn't the greatest feeling a new bit on real coming together It's mean just so good time is early in a tour

You've been on stage about 45 minutes. You're killing and You know and I've just built the audience is like oh you know the fuck is ain't heard shit yet You're all your say oh you guys think you just heard a great joke waiting near closures coming up Yeah, have you ever wrote a bit Chris where it came together so perfectly that you thought man I don't know if I can write something that good again, I mean, or equal to it, you know? I'll say this, this bit, when my daughter Lola was born, the doctor hands me my child and literally out of my mouth, I'm like, I've got to keep her off the pole,

just came out of my fucking... Say that again? I've got to keep her off the pole. Oh, that's right, yeah, yeah. I got a key. I was like, I got a key per off the pole. Oh, that's right. Yeah, yeah. And it was like, yeah, yeah. One of the best bits I ever came up with. It was like, should I just get women pregnant to come up with me? It's sick.

Yeah, it's fun. It's like a song. I'm sure you ask any song, you know, people sometimes they're one hit wonders, but there's one hit wonders where I go, this is such a perfect song. song like everything about it is working every yeah, and you go and you don't want to be that as a comedian so There's only few things when you get older that still get me going It's like there's a few tiny things in life and one is coming up with new ideas just

Or saying something fast in real life. You're like, I fucking thank God my brain still works. Because that's fun. And when you still like to do stand up or still like to write jokes, I'm happy because I know some people that have burned out on showbiz or burn on that. And they just don't like it anymore, but they go through the motions

or a comic that travels with the same hour for about 20 years, which they used to a lot. Same act, same every year you'd see them. They come around to your city and I'm like, fuck, they didn't change anything. But it was okay. Now, it's fun to write and see if you could scrape together another hour that's good. But isn't that, sometimes I would say I'm embittered by it, but I'm like, Anvious, and I'll just say the Rolling Stones. I'm just envious of people, but we have to create new material. And rock stars can just do their job.

15. We don't even want them to. And I really believe the Stones are better than they ever been because I think really winding down on a song over decades where you just know it so well. And Jagger never stops working. I mean, you know, and he can, his voice is exactly where it needs to be at almost 80. But we stand up, you like, I can't. Okay, got to start.

Fuck, a whole new hour. I mean, it's like, yeah, it's, it's, and it doesn't get any easier. I'm sitting here right now. I'm like, okay, I got, I literally have shows in next and let in the next two weeks. I have fucking shows. Well, there's two things going on. There's Chris Rock unknown, surprising the audience. Now the expectation is, you know, when they introduce you to make sure they don't go over the top

where they, because I've been dropping it Mike's ladies and gentlemen You know this guy's gonna bring it. You're gonna really you know What's your what what do you want the MC to do for you in the club? He's trying out stuff. What do you want him to say? I just just say my name no credits Just don't hype it up. You know, I mean it's weird because it's like you can't get away from being Chris rock You can't get away from being who you are And by the way you can't get away from being who you are to the guy Interintroducing you right, you know, yeah, cuz that guy's a comedian and he just is what he's I met Joe

I met Joe Koi once 10 years ago with love it or maybe it was 12 and he started tearing up just meeting me Yeah, he started getting wise or water and I go, Joe, it's okay. He's huge now, but there is that expectation and you try to remember the way they see you, you know, the way you would see someone above the food chain when you were starting. It's interesting. Yeah, I forget who used to say. Somebody said at their first letterman, they sat down and it was like talking to a $5 bill. Because you can't, yeah, you can't. Letterman was so intimidated to me

that the last few years, I would just get on my heels. I'd be in the wings and I'd see them. The last thing I'd say, where they'd introduce my name, don't give this show too much respect. Like pretended's Bakersfield today, just to get past the intimidation of David Letterman. There was something about New York, that theater in him.

And I didn't know he was intimidated by Biff. Biff was standing. Biff! You know what I mean? And he was like looking out and he's like 30 seconds. I'm like, fuck, Biff, I gotta go out there. I mean, he's so casual. And I'm like, all right, I gotta get his love like.

Yeah, I was seeing, yeah. I couldn't believe Biff wasn't an actor. Yeah, because he was on the show. He's the last thing he's seeing. He actually was, he actually made him work. He really wanted an affirmation from Biff. That's true. I'll do a Biff, Biff, you all right? Go cool. I was like, Biff. You Biff. I did a Biff.

You alright? Go cool. I was like Biff, you know, there was a time Biff was more famous than me. I was like, fuck yeah. Where's your dressing room, Biff? Shit. Alright, let's let him go, Dana. We did good with him.

It was just so much fun, Chris. It's always good. This has been a podcast presentation of Cadence 13. Please listen, then rate, review, and follow all episodes. Available now for free wherever you get your podcast. No joke, folks! Flying the Wall has been a presentation of Cadence 13, executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade,

Chris Corquan of Cadence 13 and Charlie Feinen of Brillstein Entertainment, production and engineering led by Greg Holtzman, Richard Cook, Serena Reagan and Chris Basel of Cadence 13.