Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade - Have Roasts Gone Too Far?

Episode Date: May 18, 2026

David and Dana discuss The Roast of Kevin Hart, Spencer Pratt’s Airstream, and David recaps Euphoria while Dana wonders if he should have done more nudity in his career. Also, animal sounds, Buzzing Around, and the news of the week. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You got it? What was that? Don't be jealous of my massage ball. See this? David has a sore neck or back. Look now. Watch. It's like magic.

Watch. Just watch. Watch what I'm doing. I put it there. And I lean back. It's up your butt. That's where mine is. I lost it.

I'm only laughing because how did you know that? It's a magician. You go like this. here which reminds me see it see it see it yeah where is it okay let's go this tech stuff while we're on listen is that a piggy yeah it is a little piggy that's what you do when we're trying to get extra jokes out of a bit getting little poinky do you have a pig you have a pig car that's more like uh it's more like a ward hog or something That sounds too hard.

That's too hard to get my nose involved. Yeah. Anyway, I was saying, are we all set? Yeah, we're already going. The thing about that magic ball that reminded me of euphoria. You know what euphoria is that show? Yeah, of course, Sidney Sweeney in the Hunt.

What's that mean for an Oscar? In the Hunt, I mean, you know, she's so brilliant. I mean, my God. We're watching that film. No, I don't see that. You know me. I'm a housekeeper guy. I watch that.

Oh, yeah, the housekeeper, right. Because when you love a movie and you're seeing all the performances and all the machinations, I saw it for a third time, sorry, on the airplane. Shit, Horn Dog. They're both gorgeous. That's a good, weird movie. I like it. Yeah, we talked all about it.

But I think it's no surprise. It's like three or four hundred. million globally. It's not even a cartoon. It's just a cool way. They call them sexy thrillers, fatal attraction and so forth. But this one has that third act where you kind of go,

whoa, what? Yeah, what is happening? Okay, I've got a quiz for you. Okay, let me answer till the end. Okay. Is it called the maid,

the housekeeper, the housekeeping, or the housemaid or the maid, or the maid, Keeper. It's something like one of the, I don't even know which one's right. Well, off top my head, I think it's called, hey, keeping your house. Housekeeper, I think it's just Housekeeper.

Is it called Housekeeper? When I look on box office mojo and you click on it, I'll just see. Oh, is it called? Because I thought it was called the Housemate or something where I go, I don't think this is a word everyone uses, even it's a compound word. Right. I mean, they went through so many titles. You know, we interviewed Paul Feeder. the director.

Oh, that's right. One was, yo, you keep in that house? Remember that one? I thought, that doesn't really make. One was the clean it up person?

Yeah, yeah. Bitches, bitches be vacuuming. Remember that one? That one, that was in and out. They barely even considered that.

In and out was there for a minute too. It's a huge list. Oh, it's the house maid, right? I never would have guessed that. Oh, really?

All this time. Even when I got on the airplane, I put in housekeeper. No, it's that you, I put in big boob girls that clean the stairs. And it was like, oh, that movie, that we want? And then it put in some alts. I was like, no, not those. What is that?

I'm sorry, I'm from another time and space. Yeah. Amanda, what's the actresses name? Amanda Sigfried without Roy. Yeah. Sigfried. Yeah. And her last name is hard and we're not getting it right.

I'll get me some Sigfried's and fries on the side. She is so fucking amazing in this movie. Yeah, she's great. And they're both stunning and then they're both good, which is a good combo. And who's the other guy? Chris Hemsworth. Is that who it is the main? No, the main crazy stud husband, Heather.

We got to give him some sugar. I think it's Chris Hemsworth. No. No, it's not Chris. Really? No, Heather. Sorry, hold on. Heather.

Sleep at the wheel. I went off the page. Oh, goodness. Until then, I'll tell you, she's on. Brendan. That's real household name. S-K-L-E-R-E-R-E-R-N-N-Y-N-O-W. You know, they used to say, don't change your name for Hollywood.

I think we bring that back. I would just hyped it up. I would reverse it. It's Glennar Brendan. I think that's a better thing. Sometimes just a reverser. Like if he was Spade David, he'd be huge.

Spade isn't bad, but if I was him, I honestly would go by Brandon Brendan. And that would be cool. People are like, are you Brandon, Brendan? He's like,

you mixed it up. I just want to say he's Oscar worthy too. All three of them should have got nominated. Fuck the Academy, man. The bigger star guy, the Mexican guy, was playing the Gardner. He's actually a pretty big star.

he's great too all he's doing is in the window like this and you go he's coming into this at some point yeah he was great casting for the staring creepy gardener who hasn't had you know you're just in the kitchen

have breakfast and the gardeners right up against the window like this just staring at you even housekeeping I think like it's they're staring at me well well some housekeepers have

don't really see dirt, you know, if you don't have really good glasses, you know. When I, I will tell you that in Sydney, Sweeney and Euphoria, I was thinking of the, that's what I, she plays a piggy in Euphoria. Does she? Does she? Does she? Does she make me sexual roleplay, okay? Give me the one liner.

What is Euphoria for our? Okay, here's the 2000 liner. What? Sendea, which I say her name wrong. She's cool. Great actress. I know she is. It's really these two stories this season.

Okay. They are involved in a drug ring. And Sidney needs money with her new marriage. So she's doing OnlyFans. So OnlyFans are very trendy, hip thing to talk about. But she obviously doesn't mind a little bit of nudity. So it makes it more realistic because a lot of actresses would play that, but not really good. Let me ask you if you have any regrets.

Like when you were like someone in their 20s, like if I was. I should have had my, I should have been really naked in a lot of movies at my 20s because I was just ripped. For sure. And I regret it. At Police Academy 4, they go, can you skateboard? I said, yes. And I said, they said, any questions? And I go, I'm willing to go full frontal.

And they said, okay, well, it's PG-13, but just take it under consideration. DVD extras, you know. That's what I said. I said, I'm just throwing it out there. It could be for DVD extras. It could be for during the credits. and the peak of your physical prime how many push-ups could you do

probably barely a thousand you know I did 17 13 pull-ups that's adorable now let me ask you a question it's actually hard folks at home well let me ask you a question did they allow you to do this motion

where you go up like that or are you just going straight up it was I don't think they were these which are easy that's that's called chin ups. Oh, stop it. These are easier because you're using full bicep. Yes. These, I get my broad shoulders involved.

But did you go straight up and down? This is high school, right? Okay. They let me step on a box to do it, so took some of the weight off. Well, then you did do Dana's perplex. No, but when I go to the gym, there's something called the Gravitron. God dang it, I wish I had one. Well, I just, I just, I think.

is something where you go, you step on a platform and you put the pin in and say, it's not percentages, but you say I basically counterweight. So I put my body weight at about 13 pounds, and then I go. And you're still strained. And it's easier. Yeah. Right. But I can do about five of those.

Then I put it to four pounds. Right. Because say you weigh 150. Let's just do a little quick arithmetic for you. Yeah. You weigh 150. and you go down the thing and put it in 100 pounds counterweight, how much actual weight you're pulling up?

50. What's that one? I have no idea. Someone's being stabbed. Don't make me bring mine out. But on Euphoria, long story, longer. Okay, let's go back. Sidney Sweeney says this little piggy,

she knows guys are into feet. So she's, you know, then she puts her toes in her mouth. and so I'm like everyone's like this. Then she does something which I didn't even know, even though I'm a creep, I didn't know that a lot of guys like, there's something, it's called something where she's bigger than life. So she does something in a set that looks like she's huge

and goes up to a guy and pushes her boobs against a glass naked. And like the attack of the 50 foot woman, that old movie that you remember when you were about 30. 30. No, it's not rude. I love my age. Look it up. No, I saw that in the 60s probably. Wasn't it a 50s movie? It wasn't it? It wasn't Raquel Welch, was it? No. She was in 1 million BC. One million BC. Ever seen it? She's in a fur bikini? Yeah, one. That was quick. I want to give you some love on that one. Thank you. That's a horse. Is this live from your backguard?

That's a rooster, brother. Here's what I really thought of your presentation today. You're just gambling with these. You just push a different button. It costs like $1.50. It works brilliantly. You're from Montana where men are men and sheep are nervous. I'm from Montana where men are men.

and then there's David Spade. And then you got a little tipsqueak. Hey, oh, euphoria. Euphoria. Am I still talking about you for you? I want to play a bad guy like a drug dealer, like a real prick on euphoria. Just no jokes, just being an asshole.

I think it'll be good. Let's put that in the ether that you need that sort of cast. I like that. We'll do that after grownups. And also Zendaya, Yeah, she has to do, she has to mule coke over the border. So they put it in balloons, you know what I mean, like this? And I'm like, this is going to be good acting where she dips them in Westland oil and sticks them up her boo hole, right?

Because I think that's how you do it. That's how I do it. So instead, she dips them in some sort of oil. That's fantastic. And then she swallows them and pushes them down. I'm like, rough. It does look like she's doing it. She's not doing it, Dana.

You don't understand. Are you think this appropriate for children? I don't know. Pierce Morgan is here? This Morgan's back. Where is he? Grab it. Grab it.

Where's the stick? I like Pierce Morgan. This is going to be funny. He always jumps in and says something stupid. I didn't do a fucking thing wrong. This is Dr. Tony Fauci. And from the bottom of my all new leather Fauci's,

go fuck yourself. Fuck yourself. I like, did you see the video of the cruise ship where you see someone coming out of the room like this? And it's Fauci. Oh, really? And he goes, oh, I'm not supposed to be here. Yeah.

He goes, I'm just supposed to start this disease and leave on a little raft. Hey, man, I just make fun of everybody. Get over it, people. But here we are. So, David Spade, you're talking about TV show Euphoria for like 20 minutes. that are 40-minute podcasts, must be very important to you to see a woman act like a piggy

and suck her own thumb, her own feet. Is that what you find funny? You think people enjoy that? Is that your goal in life is to do gross weena jokes and bun-hole references? I mean, sort of, but I feel like euphoria is really, they always say pushing the limits,

but it doesn't mean it's in a great way. Like, I don't mind that storyline. I don't think it's that sexy. It's just sort of interesting that she's trying to make money. And she's on a stream. And so they're tapping into what's going on lately. But I think the other story is a little better about Zendaya is getting involved in this drug ring because she's in way over her head.

Is that what you find amusing? Oh, boy. Something euphoria. You went right back to that, Piers? Is that? It's not amusing. It's more supposed to be sexual. Do you ever do jokes that don't have sort of an X-rated sort of sensibility to them?

Can you do just like, you know, the duck cross the road type jokes? I know. I don't really. This is a real gotcha moment for me. I guess they're all dirty. Pierce, did you see the rose? Yes, I watched it, and then I had to turn it off. It's got a stomach egg, got nauseous.

That's a lot of X-rated, really offensive stuff. Why is it funny to have grown men and women try to bring each other down in such an X-rated fashion? Is that what the Americans like? now. Is that what you're all about? That's a good question. I said, is that what the Americans? Oh, my God. I was thinking. You like to think, don't you?

Pierce, did you think it was too racial or do you think it was too mean, maybe? Well, I don't find it funny when people are truly sad and embarrassed at the hands of a lethal comedian with five or six writers writing inappropriate stuff that goes right to the core of a human bead. I'd rather watch I Dream of Jeannie Reruns. You know that show. Yes. Oh, yeah, I know it.

You're like major healing going, Hey, Jeannie, why don't you make your tongue six feet long and lick my nuts from the kitchen? I can't do it. Dana, that was a dice clay joke. I thought it was so funny. Oh, dice. The greatest.

I love dice. You ever see I dream of Jeannie? And a lot of people in the audience are like, not really. We're younger. And he goes, Major healing, he's always like, oh, Jeannie. She's like, can I do anything?

He's like, oh, no, you could make my bed and maybe a lemonade. What are you an idiot? Jeannie says, can I do anything? You know what, Jeannie? You can. How about you make your tongue eight feet long and lick my balls from the kitchen? On tour now with John Lovitz, by the way. Run and get your tickets.

Dice. I'm going to see him and I'm going to tell him. do that joke. He's like, yeah. So funny. I know. Oh, yeah, he's out with Lovitz a lot. Lovez was at the Chris Rock, which we should say in our sister podcast.

Right. Our other podcast where we have a guest, Chris Rock. We filmed it live at the Orphium, maybe. And it's out right now. Right, it's out right now. Lovitz came to watch. We had a big crowd. It was a lot of fun.

And Chris Rock was high hysterical as usual. Well. Hey, John, I like your jacket. Jealous? No, not really. Not jealous. John was in full form. Do you know all he likes blue, which I do too. And all his cars are blue. And most of them have a flat tire or least. And his balls. They sit in the front. I'm kidding. Hey, everyone, it's Stavros Halakis, and I'm here to tell you about my podcast, Stavi's World. Each week we're joined by great guests like Josh Safdi, Eric Andre, Caleb Heron, and more. It's sort of an interview show, but really, we're just messing around, making each other laugh, and hopefully making you laugh while you're washing the dishes or grocery shopping or on a long drive. Plus, I take listener calls where we have honest conversations about dating life and everything in between. Imagine if your therapist was a vulgar degenerate whose office was a woman.

in a Greek diner. No scripts, no polish, and absolutely no holding back. Listen to Stavi's world wherever you get your podcasts. Hi everybody, I'm Maury Povich. On my podcast on par with Maury Povich, I'm going to sit down with the icons, the stars, and the faces at the very center of today's big cultural moments. With everyone from comedians Josh Johnson, Dan Soder, Leon Morgan, to newsmakers Don Lemon, Joy Reid, Aaron Parnas, and so many more. So join me for new episodes every week because nothing is off limits. Great conversations. They're always on par. Follow and listen to On Par with Mari Povich, wherever you get your podcast.

I saw this Spencer Pratt, they're giving him shit now that we're talking about the election down town. Spencer Traff from reality show it falls into showbiz, but he's from the hill. He's from the hills, but you know, 20 years ago, like a lot of people 20 years ago. Right. So, yeah. But he is trying. going to win. I don't know if he's that good. I don't know. I just know it's very interesting to see like a guy out of the blue come in. Yeah. And shake it up because LA, there is some fixes we

could do. There is definitely some fixes. It's not perfect. Never will be perfect. But they were busting his balls. Sorry, was Lauren in there? Yeah, there's no such thing as utopia. Oh, that's a good. It's a good thing for Lauren to add. I like that. he's just waiting for something else to say. It looks like a duck. It's okay to have a lull in a podcast when there's three million that they could click to. Yeah.

You know what? You don't need to talk over each other. Give it some air. Give it some space. So he lives in an air stream, which funnily enough, when I used to roll with Sean Penn, And he had one in Malibu.

He had one because when he lived with Madonna, which some people are too young to remember that, their house burned down. It was like an acre in Malibu on the mountain. And one time we went out there and I was like, I thought our house burned down. I think I saw on TV. He goes, no, I still love it.

So he had an airstream. And he just drove out in the middle of his burnt acre, parked in front of an airstream. It's like, want some flapjacks. So that's what Spencer has. And he didn't add where he goes, yeah, Sean was like, you know, what he did? He played a cassette of Jewel because Jewel was directing her video. Oh, okay.

I think dating her. And wanted me to hear it. Anyway, that was, that's, that gives you the timeline. So here's Spencer Pratt. It just reminded me of that air stream. Right. And he said, here's where I live. Here's where Karen Bass and all the other people live.

Right. mansions, you know. They say mansions for like $3 million. Meanwhile, those aren't for sure mansions. We picture it in real life. When does a big ass house become a mansion? Five seconds. I think it's not what you think is a kid with like 20 rooms and like that. I said five seconds. Oh, fuck. I think 20 rooms. Wrong. I hate that I like the piggy. Well, I don't know why. I picked the pig.

It seems to have an overarching meaning about a lot of things. Here's what I saw, and I don't know if anything's true, all blah, blah, blah, is when the fire happened, house burnt down. I'm sure he had an airstream and he came out of it. But then I guess, unless it's bogus, he now lives at the Bel Air Hotel and his family lives in someplace else. Right. That's what they, so I was getting at as the ad shows he's like standing from the

which I'm sure he is real because he put that on there after burned down because they don't know where to go. But TMZ asked him, popped him on it and he said, oh, well, I don't really live anywhere. So I can say I live there because that's what I own. I stay at the Bel Air Hotel for last month because of because of death threats, which is possible. If he just sits there, people can just drive up right up to him and beat him up. Well, once he got now a new kind of of fame in the political arena. Political is very scary. You got to be able to wear a Kevlar jacket under your t-shirts.

And he has security now and I saw a picture that. And then his, maybe his kids are up in Santa Bar. Fine. It is, it's a half a gotcha. But I have to say, when you're starting to do well,

there's someone else here running. And you know how it is. When people start to do well, one side of the other is going to go, we'll take care of that. And then they dig a little harder and try to make sure no one gets too ahead. of the race. And so both sides are really, it's a bloodbath here, and also for governor, you know.

Yeah. Politics is a brutal thing to go into. I really kind of amazed how thick-skinned people get with the constant, you know, like Bill O'Reilly said about Trump, he can take more punishment than anybody else, just as far as just the onslaught of hate. I couldn't take it. I can't even read the comments saying your hair wasn't good today. I'm really. up and start crying. I can't say the comments I'm about to get from my hair. And most of them are not for me. I will say not to defend Trump. So when he was building, of course, everything I say is probably not true. But when he was building that addition to the White House, he says, okay, I'm building it with everyone's mad, but I'm paying for. When Obama did it, it was back.

Yeah. And friends. Yeah. And friends. Me and my friends and donors. Great. So you can't get mad. but lately I think it's moved to tax dollars. So I think that's a trick because they're giving Gavin Newsom shit because the state capital is being built for a billion. It seems high. Both of them when you get to a billion seem high for a big house, a big whatever it is. State capital or the White House, it's all.

But I think it must be a security thing with bunkers and shit. That's got to be it because I don't understand. So I do think Trump shouldn't have said that add that addendum of like, oh, now it's going to be taxpayers. I had not heard that. Governor Jerry Brown just lived in like a little apartment or something. I don't think he lived in where the mansion. Yeah, he lived in like a little house. That guy was.

Leave that to Gigi paint. He was the real deal. Okay. You know, now he lives up in northern Nevada in some kind of track of land. We'll take that little body. He made a hud of a hickory. And that's his main abode. Just give me whatever little rocket man lives in.

Just a little shit shack, little stabbing cabin. Get up there near Wendover. You can go drop a couple silver dollars if you're feeling like. Windover is the place I almost got killed in the private jet. You know that? Nevada. Yeah, there's a big, there's a casino. You can fly into Salt Lake City and drive an hour and a half.

And there's a casino in Nevada, way, way up north. I'm sure I played it. It's a toddle in town. You probably have you. You'd remember it. I'm going to Yuma, Arizona. Beep, beep. Hi, I'm from Arizona.

God, scraping the bottom of the barrel. I think you're going with me. Are we doing Yuma? Are we doing you? What? No, we're doing. It's literally down by Mexico and California. It's right.

Well, wait a minute. I don't know if I have that in my calendar. You're doing it. You're doing an hour 20 and I'm doing three. I'm opening it up with hot seven and just getting out, getting a Diet Coke and watch the magic from the wings. That'd be you. I go, you're up, guy. Let's go slugger.

You're blabby. Oh, I wish you. I know. Hold on a sec. There's a special guest. Hello. How are you guys doing? That guy looks like Epstein, but it's not him.

I am not Brian Epstein, you silly fool. Everybody, oh, whatever. The Beatles? I used to manage the Beatles, yes. Yeah, okay. Yes, I used to manage the Beatles. Now I manage my mustache. Jealous?

Can you go around mustache like this? I look like Jeffrey Epstein. It's the bane of my existence. God, but I'm not him and I'm not in witness protection by it. Dana, did you see the roast, by the way? It doesn't respond. I was going along with it. That's worse than the pig reaction.

No, I was laughing. The roast. Yeah, I've seen clips. Yep. Anything jump out to you? The comments I got after were a little mean and sometimes not really joking. They're just really rough. And then Michael Che said it shouldn't be where a lot of a black roast with more white writers.

So, I mean, I think you can always dig in and find something negative. But roast are fucking brutal. Don't even get involved. It's just so brutal. You don't want to be in there. You don't want to be in the room. You don't want to be. I thought they shouldn't have had those actresses there

because I feel like Netflix was like, hey, you should do the roast. It'll be fun. You don't know much about it. But it's a big event. And you can make fun of people. And then they just get eviscerated. They don't even know what's coming.

It's like, yeah, I mean, you know, again, I grew up with the sort of Jimmy Stewart, Dean Martin Rose. Those were great. They were, it was all kind of a happy thing. But at one point, Roes jumped the shark and went downtown into what is the foulest most, like the first time I saw one and really watched, it was Chevy Chase.

That's the one that were jumped in the show. And then I saw the camera and I could tell there was pain in his eyes. And I thought, is this like an execution or something? This is not friendly, funny. Chevi, you fall down a lot. It was like. Right. So, yeah, it went from Sinatra getting Rose.

by Don Rickles, his friends, you know, Paul Newman, huge stars, John Wayne, it went to, Chevy was the first one where I think they just hired assassins. When it's not a friend, just a good road comic, and they're like, this next comic,

and they're like, hey, Chevy, you fucking asshole. And he's like, me? Who's this guy? And then it's like over and over, what a piece of shit you are. And then you go, this kind of lost the fun. I know.

Well, I should probably, announce this that I did sign up to be roasted. You would get a lot of money to be roasted. Right. But here's my strategy and tell me what you think about it. So there are, hey, your movies, well, this and that. I will just pretty much cry the entire time. Ah, yeah.

What happened to you? Why are you even saying this, man? I'll just be in tears. I'll roll in a ball and just cry the entire 90 minutes. What do you think, Heather? I like it. I would say, I would say this. If I get roasted the whole time, they'll have a mic.

I mean, let's hear this. Sticks and stones. I make my bones. I'll wash and over here. Sticks and stones. Yeah, but how about this? I roast me. Just say anything.

Hey, Dana. That's a dumb plant. Shut up. You just shut your face, man. I don't like you. You fucker. I mean, that's me at the roast. Okay, give me one.

I'll give you one. Hey, David Spade. You're Joe Dirt. This roast is over. And then I walk out. Here's me on the roast, right? Okay, to roast me. Okay, hey, Dana, I guess you like five are energy.

You have three boxes. And then you have to imagine me in an ejection seat. I'm like, what did you say? Wow! And I just hit the ceiling. I'm not going to sit and take it. Fuck no. There you go.

Well, definitely you bring two or three of these. You could play that after every row. A roast joke they do against you. Yeah. But there were some good jokes. I have to say this roast. I'm not saying it was Chevy Chase. It was a good roast.

I only saw about an hour, but you see the clips and you go, ooh. Rough, rough. It's just that, yeah, whatever. It's raising money for a charity, right? Sort of. Oh, sorry. I step up to that. I think Kevin Hart gets paid.

Well, that. Chelsea looked. I thought she looked great. I mean, she was really. again, I don't even know if I would have gone about Chelsea. She's funny, but, and she did some good jokes. It's just when you start everyone's like sort of when I went to the roast, they were lasered on Ann Coulter and after the roast.

I remember that one. Because she joined in late. Someone fell out. And Martha Stewart was funny. Was that one of them? I don't think she was on mine. Because you don't expect her. Go ahead.

Yeah. What happened is someone fell out like three days before. And I think they just said, hey, this will be a way to promote. out your book. I don't think she knew what she was getting into because if you like her or not, it was a, it was really rough. They just, and even after I think Jeff Ross told me, he said, you're lucky because there was more jokes toward you because you haven't done a roast yet. And then they all, a lot of them switched to her when she joined. Like all the like, oh, let's get her instead. And so I couldn't, I couldn't even handle anything. Like, I was like this.

do you really think that? No, no, do you really think that? Because some of those stay with you. When you hear an angle of something that, like if you didn't know something about yourself and then everyone's doing that joke and you're like, I wasn't even aware of that.

Well, that's the thing. They're holding up a mirror and you're kind of like, you don't know what your contemporaries really think about you. And so they're going for your weakest points and you're like, oh, so this is like with Chevy they were brutal that way.

It feels Roman, gladiator. Yeah. And so the more cruelty is like, yeah, and the audience is going crazy. Yeah, you know. Well, it'll help a career of someone if they're really rough.

They're like, you got them. You got them. You took them down, man. We like to see our perform. But, you know, Kevin Hart, he's been on those shows a lot, right? This is the first time he was fully. It feels like he gets roasted a lot.

So it felt like he kind of, it was going to be 80% short jokes. But I like clever joke. There's some real clever jokes, though. Yeah, good comedy, good jokes is always good. But is it still on Netflix? So they kind of moved it. No, it's live.

That's why it's the only negative is it like three hours because they don't, they used to edit them. Now they don't. They're live. So there's some fat in there. But here's a good nagging thing they do on TikTok. Heather might have seen this one. I like that.

Tiki who? Talk you what? It's where you make someone feel bad, but you act like you're not. So the guy asks his girlfriend, uh, hey, if you, you guys, could change anything about yourself besides the obvious, what would you change? And she goes, oh, wait, besides what? And she goes, well, just besides the obvious. What would you change? If you could change one thing. And she goes, what, what's the obvious? And he goes, no, besides that,

anything. And she goes, wait, what is what is what is the obvious? Yeah, is there something that everyone thinks? He goes, yeah, yeah, but not that. And he got her going for about a good 40 seconds before she goes, hey, fuck you. Like, but it. But, It is kind of funny because you say, so if someone said to me, I would go, there's a lot here that you could get. I know. Well, there's an old saying that I think is very wise. Other people's opinions of me are none of my business. That's not bad. I don't care. Think what you want. I don't care. I'm called the Teflon man. No, I'm not. You're rubber. I'm glue. Would you do? do to me, I do to you. Is that how that goes? When people say, uh, I say move and they say make me, I go, I don't make trash, I burn it. And then everyone goes, oh, snap. I love the world you live in, the roast, comedy store, the comedians, Bobby Lee's running around. Bobby Lee, the Shane Gillis

coming out there. The Netflix, uh, posy, lunch that, you couldn't make the brunch and you really did want to make the brunch. I was going to make the brunch. I was ready to go to the brunch. We did a podcast at your house. I was going to ride shotgun with you to the brunch. But my back, I don't get back stuff. Don't, you know. How did that go, by the way? The guy was extraordinary, Dr. Parker. Oh, he was. Yeah, extraordinary. He did stuff, you know, he did stuff to me, I'll never forget. And then he also did some chiropractic work. That's a joke. Everything you say is x-rated. No, he did stuff like, and it really worked. You lay down on the table and then he puts a belt around you, like you're strapped in,

and then the table starts to separate like you're in a torture chamber in the 15th century Rome. But just in a very gentle way. Does it open your backup? Yeah. Yeah. And then it really opened everything up. And then I, you know, he. You still had a drive.

Didn't you were fly? Well, then I drove. I flew after that. six hours. I flew to New York and I did a corporate I did a gig the next night and then I flew back and then I'm meeting Matt

at departures. We planned it. So I'm going through American Airlines. I'm walking like a mile. I'm following people. I guess I'll go left. I guess go there. I don't know where I am. And then I see, okay, I got to go up. So I see an escalator

coming down. Oh, great. There's escalators. Then I see the escalator that was going to go up. And I mean really up, like 200 feet. It's broken. Then I see a staircase, 200 stairs straight up. I'm kind of adrenalized. I'm pretty strong and pretty tough. But anyway, so I had a really heavy suitcase, and I just went up and it felt really good

because I was sitting for six hours. Now it's a little bit tweaked. But it was very good. It was very good. Okay. I am glad you're feeling a little better. Oh, we got to do buzzing around. Busing around.

Okay. I want to do, and this is, this is, this is, this is live in our thing. I want to do, I want to do, um, come on over. King Charles. The dog? King Charles from Great Britain. Oh, okay. There's a dog named King Charles.

That bullies other dogs. King Charles on a life raft or isolated somewhere. And who else might be with King Charles? What's Heather's hair doing in the frame? She's fixing. She's finding. She's a Prell girl. All right.

You can keep going. Oh, I have to introduce it. That's right. So you're going to do King Charles and who else? Well, who would be very not you wouldn't expect with King Charles? Arnold. Arnold and King Charles. It's time for buzzing around, Dana.

Busing around. Sponsored by Five Hour Energy. with a wide variety of bold flavors to choose from, you get as much caffeine as a 12 ounce premium cup of coffee, but with zero sugar, zero crash. Find 5R energy shots online at 5Renergy.com or Amazon today. Now, you want King Charles, you want two others? Yeah, I wanted King Charles because I saw him do the address to Congress,

and I just like doing him now. This is such an intense accent. Okay. On a life raft. On a life raft with, let's say, The receptionist at your doctor. And who else? Oh, no.

I'm going to have to call the doctor. That's right. She's going to say a lot of that. Okay. The receptionist character. King Charles. Oh, and Tyson. Oh, yeah.

Okay. Tyson, the receptionist and King Charles on a life wrap. Yeah. There we go. Buzzing around. Here we go. Take one. You know, it's so strange that here we find ourselves in the middle of the ocean.

There's no way around, no paddle, and no way to retrieve ourselves inland, right? Receptionist lady? Oh, we're in the middle of the ocean. I'm going to have to call the doctor. Maybe you could call the doctor Mark Mike Tyson. You know, I am not calling the doctor. you know, what are you going to do about it? What do you mean?

I'm not going to call the doctor. What do you're going to go? Oh, I like it. I like this. What are you going to do about it? What are you going to do about it? Ooh, he wants to a fighter? Hold on, hold on, Mr. Michael Tyson.

I love your boxing matches. And of all the boxes in history, you're one of the best. I mean, the predecessors before you, Jack Dempsey and others, their predecessors, Jake Sullivan. I don't know what you're talking about. What are you talking about? The predecessors. I didn't go, I didn't go.

I got a third grade education. What are you talking about? I don't know about the predecessors, but your predecessors, perhaps we could throw you in the ocean with some kind of buoy or rope around you and you could swim to the shore with the strength and your muscles. Yeah, I'm not going to jump out of the raft in the middle of the Pacific. You're not jumping out to the raff? No, no, he's not jumping on the raft.

Oh, yeah, I got it. Yeah, what are you going to do about it? You got to call one of my penisesars? I don't really bring our relationship to fisticauffs. Fistichops. What are you going to do about it? I'm not going to say to you put up your dukes like a pigeon sisters did. Duke's.

What are you going to do about it? What are you going to do about it? What are you going to do? What are you going to do? What are you going to do about it? What are you going to do about it? The more you say that, the more I want to punch you in your snows. He's baiting him into a fight.

Yeah, go ahead, punch me. What do you think you're going to do about it? What are you going to do about it? Oh, you're on a tape loop. You must be dehydrated. I'm going to call the doctor. That's right. Yes, call the doctor, Jolio.

And remember, always, in the life rap with Mike Tyson, there's nothing he's going to do that you say. And he's going to always say, you like his speech. predecessors, yeah, what are you going to do about it? I mean, what are you going to do about it? Where's the piggy at the end? What are you going to do about it? What are you going to do?

Hey, I think we've got something to eat. Look at this. Look at this. Just jumped into the raft. Jumped in. Oh, good. Johnny good. I love pork, just like my predecessors.

Oh, man. And scene. Thank you. That was a good buzzing around with no prep. Sponsored by Five Hour Energy's tasty caffeine flavors. Enjoy big flavor in a tiny bottle. Five Our Energy shots pack the flavors of the season. Portable, two-ounce shot.

Five-hour energy shots pack the flavors of the season portable. Find Five-Rour energy shots online at Five-Fournergy.com or Amazon today. Oh, you got it right there? Got a parrot. Yeah, let's do a couple stories because we're already running late. Yeah, we're always running. That was a good one. I liked it.

I liked it. Thanks for the assist, Heather, with the receptionist character. Yeah, it's always funny. And Tyson, thank you. I like that Tyson, if he got dehydrid or there was a fight that they would have to call the doctor. What are you going to do about it? Okay. This is a baseball one.

I don't know what it was. Oh, no, it's bullfighting. Holy shit. Is that real? They do, yeah. Wow. It finally brings some fun back to bullfighting. They always were white.

They can see the blood when they get gourd. They don't have a cape or anything. They're just gymnast now? Dude. There's no deception? Mary Lou Retton. Wow. Look at how cool that is.

I know you're going to say it's AI. You know what? I think it could be AI. It could be, but they say. But I'm not sure. This is. Listen, they need this to bring back bullfighting. It's getting all stale.

What's the vertical? What's the vertical? Let's see. Okay. I don't know if I would stand there and do a standing back. So maybe it's AI. I mean, I would go on a bull ring and I'd tussle with it. I'd grab its horns and try to wrestle it to the ground.

But I don't know if I'd try to do a back flip over its head. Well, first of all, is it AI? Five seconds. I don't know because everything's AI. So really, this is going to be, I'm saying this is going to get all the way to court where you say we have a video of you committing a crime and you just say it could be AI and then you walk free yeah and you just go you know judge I've enjoyed my time here I like all the evidence stuff pretty cool we had lunch breaks I enjoyed it a lot I'm just gonna tell

you you go fuck yourself because guess what I got two little letters for you they can allow me to walk out right now and ain't a freaking thing you can do about one is a and one is I so long you say judge is that a i or not you got five seconds judge goes oh i do that a lot with anyone any question you have five seconds what's your favorite movie you have five seconds the best is you make it more stress if you go what's your favorite movie you have five seconds five four three they can't think they're okay he's like you know i'm not going to hang out with you because you make me nervous all the time you know you're not going to hang out with me yeah

what are you going to do about it i mean what are you going to do about it just buy a pig Oh my God, this is a combo platter. I know. I'm operating on all comedic cylinders. Part of me thinks it's real because you see a lot of athletic young people doing things like that. I agree. It could be real because they should be doing that. But I don't like when they stab them.

So they should just dance around. Oh, the whole. And then they stab them 100 times and it dies slowly. I don't know. Hemingway loved it. I'll take that part out. Yeah, but Ernest Hemingway loved it. What are you going to do about?

But that. Ernest Hemingway. Why does Mike Tyson know anything about Ernestown? Mike Tyson is very bright. He says very wise, all the stuff he says. Anyway. Next story. What do you got?

California mayor. Ellen Wang admits to be, oh, yeah, Chinese agent. What the freak? Yeah, did you hear this story? Arcadia. That's in Los Angeles County, just north and east of downtown L.A. now facing federal charges of acting as an agent of China. Eileen Wang is set to appear in court this afternoon, expected to plead guilty in the coming days.

She says guilty. The one felony count of acting as an illegal agent. Wang faces a potential sentence of up to 10 years in prison. Charges stem from a website that she ran. No, the website was called communism from China is the best. It gave it away. Isn't China great? Why is the USA suck so bad?

Your system's not as good as ours. Love communist china.com. Communism is sort of inching in any way, but I can't believe they caught her. And she said, yeah, yeah, yeah, I did. Well, this dovetails was something I accidentally saw. You ready for it? Yeah, go ahead. So Michael Pompeii was a former in Trump's administration, whatever.

he's Secretary of State, he's a big global. Pompey. Yeah, I've heard of him. Michael Pompey, I think. And he just said that China, communist China is just all over our society, just infiltrating everywhere. So I'm watching him say this.

They're in our schools. They're in our businesses. They're in our politics. They're just like infiltrating. I thought, I thought you're exaggerating. Reach for the clicker. That's bullshit.

And then this story comes in my go. Whoa, whoa, what? Well, also. Buying a lot of land near Army bases. I would just say let's make it quid pro quo. Can we go buy land in China? Can we do everything? No.

But I think we could take an advantage of in those situations. I think we want to take over a country just buy all its farmland and just go, you know, with animals on it. Did your animal have a baby? What do we talk about last time? The baby's coming in July. Just rest for it. Live stream.

Live stream. But McGrow says, hungry, I was feeding it last night. Oates Holland Oates I used to a joke I go Hollin' Remember when they broke up

Yeah Oates had a chance on his own didn't he? Tonight Oates One night only Oats

One show With his opening axe Sowing his is the opener and Oats is the headliner Pretty good Joe

Not bad All right Next one Let's try it Let's see this Okay Um Yeah

Oh, watch this guy attack this bad guy right here. You ready? A little jiu-jitsu for you, Dana. Wow, no, that's amazing. He attacks an armed security guard. He jumps on him with a kind of Bruce Lee move and gets his head in a... I've seen that move before. If you're not, don't see it.

Yeah, I've seen it before with... That's, like, perfectly done. Yeah, that was Lauren and Marcy, one angry night. That's a tricky one because I, the reason I don't... don't do that move, like at the post office, if someone bumps me, is that? Jump up and get them in a leg lock. It's a hard one to get right. I get that wrong a lot of the time. Yeah, I've heard.

Okay, that's all. All right, one more, and then we'll get, you got to go. You got to get your mud bath. Heather's just heating. I got to get a mud bath. Oh, it's an aquarium. And this guy's being an asshole and lighting a cigarette. Okay. They're saying, don't put it out. And he throws it in the water?

Oh, the dolphin. The beluga whale. The blue whale spills. I can't believe what I just saw. So the beluga whale senses the pressure. It doesn't want, knows there's no smoking, and spews like 10 gallon on the guy's head with a cigarette. Did I get that right?

Your video, not mine. It could be AI, but if it was AI, he would have nailed the cigarette a little harder. Right. It could have been AI. If it was AI, he would have stood up and walked over the whale. Now I'm thinking it's AI. I know.

I know. What is it? It doesn't matter. We have our chuckle either way. Where does it go? What's going on? What does it matter? Who cares?

Just be out of control. What happened in Tulsi Gabbard? Why did she get raided? That scared me. I don't know what's going on. Did she get raided? Isn't she still in Trump's administration? They raided her office.

And they're like, wait, aren't you? the raider? Why are you getting raided? When in doubt, raid, that's what they're saying. Hey, guys, we haven't raided in a while. Maybe she knows something because all these scientists that are dropping like flies are like, they all know something and they're like, oh, they just put two in the back of their own head. Well, that's going around a lot that any of these scientists related to UFOs. Yeah. Yeah, I had the haunt of virus. Yeah. Are you okay? No, it was just had a nightmare.

I would you get it from fucking Mickey. I had a haunting virus. Did I get it from Mickey Rourke? I got it from Ratatoui. That guy's the horniest animal out there. He's cute and everything, but he's riddled with diseases. They wanted me to do that lead character. I turned him down.

Ratatoui. Yeah, I said, a French rat. Not going to happen. Finally, Pixar makes a bomb. But then they rewrote it and put... Pat and who's got a great voice. I have a boring voice as much. myself.

Here's your ratatooie. Hey man, I got to go make some food. Here's you starting's ratatutti like, you gotta get a little sandwich. And I'm like, I'm ratatooie. I got to make some food.

Get the pots and pans, cling, clang, cling. Get the mixer. And the water. Brim, brim. Brim.

And the water dripping? I did this character, which I only did a couple times at open mics called sound effective, which I've told you. And it was just, you could do it better than me, but it's just the, just a guy, he's, that's all he does. Ladies and gentlemen, sound effecty, you know, it's like, so I'm walking across wet grass. I open my car door. It's the same sound.

I start my car. Shitty sound effecty. I wrote just the mirror. That's not bad. I just think it's fine. I clean my teeth. I pick up a cup. All right, that's the show.

I take a sip. All right, this has been the show. We ran too long again. This has been the show. We gave you way more than you paid for again. Yeah. That's it. Okay, thanks everybody.

Thanks for joining us. And we'll see you next time. See you next time on Fly on the Wall. Is that a geese? I think so. Hey guys, if you're loving this podcast, which you are, be sure to click follow on your favorite podcast app. Give us a review, five-star rating,

and maybe you can share an episode that you've loved with a friend. If you're watching this episode on YouTube, please subscribe. We're on video now. Fly on the Wall is presented by Odyssey, and executive produced by Danny Carvey and David Spade, Heather Santoro, and Greg Holtzman, Mattie Sprung, Kaiser and Leah Reese Dennis of Odyssey.

Our senior producer is Greg Holtzman, and the show is produced and edited by Phil Sweet Tech. Booking by Cultivated Entertainment. Special thanks to Patrick Fogarty, Evan Cox, Mora Curran, Melissa Wester, Hillary Schuff, Eric Donnelly, Colin Gaynor, Sean Cherry, Kirk Courtney, and Lauren Vieira. Reach out with us any questions to be asked and answer on the show. you can email us at fly on the wall at odyssey.com. That's A-U-D-A-C-Y-I-I-com.