Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade - It’s Okay, We’re Famous (Post Thanksgiving Special)

Episode Date: December 1, 2025

Dana and David deliver a fun heaping of laughs in this post Thanksgiving special with boring stories from the road, reviews of stuff they’ve been watching, a brand new Buzzing Around segment, and why Arizona banned porn… Plus, a quick round of news. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Just kind of peacocking in my coat right now. Don't worry about it. Mm-hmm. You like this shit? I'm organizing my hair to make it look disorganized. Nice. Here's what I say when I have a nice coat on. I go, oh, here's actually a good one Gerbett says to me when I have a coat on.

He goes, I got one. just like that except mine's expensive why should he tease the client that he has more money it's so true that god dang agents and managers are richer than the clients it's sickening hey man

it all goes back to colonel tom parker yeah Elvis busting his hump Elvis let's get back out there I don't want to do 700 dates colonel I'm already 525 pounds I well as now you let me take care of all that flibble flabble flingle flingle you go up and the people love it I always wonder what it was like when they first revealed to him

the white jumpsuit you know we got something in mind for your next headlining date don't take he pulls a black leather jacket no wait a minute wait a minute uh why it looks like a circus clown what's with the bell bottoms well bell bottoms and what all the kids are doing well i think i got a i got a belt buckle looks like a dinner plate it you need a big belt buckle because you're the king yeah if it catches a glare it's going to knock out the driver of atlas 3-1 i christ sakes okay what did he play in the end of the time there circus circus with that it put the king of rock up in some kind of netting device

so that the gamblers can look up and see them have a pastrami sandwich coated with Vicodin. All right? Good, you know, I was staying in Circus, Circus, Circus, and my buddy works there, and he said, they built a new tower. He goes, you know what's going to be called? Circus, Circus, Circus.

And I go, oh, really? And he goes, guess what we have coming in 20, 29? I go, circus, circus, circus? He was, who the fuck told you? I go, I know what I was just guessing. And he goes, no, did someone leak that? Because we sign an NDA. I go, well, it really couldn't be any other name.

That's so funny. When you go to Vegas, like I'd always be like, oh, they've seen my act, right? So then you'd go do crowd work and you say where you're staying. And they say I'm at the, you know, oh, and you go, what a shit hole. That's a huge laugh. I'm at the Hilton. Oh, that's a shit hole. But anyway, but I used to go, they said circus, circus.

And I go, that's lousy, lousy, standing ovation. I'm stealing that. It's gone. I forgot and that you. I stole it. Heather put it in the lockbox. Slow motion of the audience after. Hurry out.

Lousy, lousy. Then they bite of their hands and whack off. People think, we're either hamming it up or we're punchy. I'd say we're punchy. Dude, I just landed, dude. Mm-hmm. First of all, I will tell you. All right.

Wait, what's my other story? You know, I just say your stupid. Well, no, I want to hear it. I know you flew in here for just to do this podcast and you fly out in 20 minutes, so I need to know. It's called Married to Work and how much I give a care and nobody else cared. I care. Too deep. That's my crime.

I don't understand. a word you're saying i know i look kind of cool this is my coat i wore on the special nobody cares this is the coat yep it is huh well i do think the dandelion uh outfit was your wasn't bad right i thought it was good yeah dandelion has sort of swept the nation like the hula hoop like everyone we it's kind of fading now but everyone got into it everyone's all over it It was TikTok trending, all this clips, but it's fading out. I will tell you that I'll tell you quickly about my boring flight. So I took a flight.

I went to Arizona. My brother's in the hospital, so sending him good vibes by my brother Brian. So I went to see him, came back, and you know what JSX is? Do you know those letters when they're used in that order? Well, I don't know what it means. Jumpers seat X-rated? I don't know what I mean. Jets Suite X, I think.

Jet Suite. So it's like they get a golf stream. They get an 18-seater, golf stream type, or 15-seater. And you pay a certain amount, a little extra, and you can go to a prize. It's like you get to Vegas fashion. You go to like, it's sort of, I think their motto is for the almost rich. So you go and you take like a Southwest flight, but it's, you just go to the hangar. there's no TSA, you just walk right on, you be there, you get there 15 minutes before.

So it's a little more of cakewalk. So anyway, I land, I go grab my bags. It's very casual. They just throw them off the plane. You just grab your own and get out of it. Yeah, yeah. And so, of course, because I'm such a fragile dandelion. I have too many bags, so I grab the big one and I give my little one a ride on it.

That's pretty smart. But I have one old S&L bag that is too heavy to carry all of them. So I go, I'll come back for this one. So I tell someone to guard it. That's like you're at the beach. Watch my stuff, you know, that old. Like they're legally responsible now. So I go, I'm taking it by my wheels.

And I'm like, I literally go, these aren't glass anymore. These wheels on my luggage are so kick-ass that it's so smooth now. I went all these years without it. And it's like ice skating through. and it was going and I go no it's kind of catching and I go I need a little WD 40 on these but I said no time for that I get it out to the car some guy is there he goes actually I'll throw these on go get each other bag so I do that he throws them on that's a big clue of the story I'm I'm just going to say it I'm riveted glued to the set wheels on a suitcase

first time only welcome to the 21st century I know I'm these are good ones for the first time oh good ones not we had a great sponsor at great wheel they go in every direction you want to go this way or you want to go that way let's do either oh it's unbelievable you spin it yeah it's incredible it's usually if they're all like a skateboard then you take a left and they go clunk and it falls over oh no no yeah if they're 360 yeah then you just yeah okay this is something we stole from the aliens this is why I believe that documentary okay so we do that I'm like trial I get in my boiling hot car boil sizzle drive mm-hmm I get about 12 to 14 in it Heather calls she doesn't always call Heather calls and you're driving from the airport to what's

there to talk about scary scary something's up oh it's like she needs something or yeah yeah okay got it instead of texting or voxering me I go go for dicky If I see Heather's name on my phone, I slam it against the wall as hard as I can. Why, you know, it's trouble. I don't know. It just sounded funny to say that. You slam on your brakes because, you know, don't go any farther until you hear this call. All right.

So I pull over. I go, what up? Whoop, whoop, whoop. Okay. I sometimes go like this, cello. That's not bad. So anyway, I go, what? And she says, do you think you have your right suitcase?

Oh, she's that quick that you took the wrong one from the JSX jet. Talk about the wrong, Misty. I got the wrong. And I go, wow. I bet I do because my wheels weren't gliding on the way out. I had some dog shit mags on them. I was like, oh, you're spider sense. This is a little rough.

But I was, you know, everyone's trying to get Heather. I'm running. How many, how many minutes are you away? from the jet when you get the heather 12 and 14 oh well it's just a little slow for her so i got to flip a bitch no it's not really she was no hero let's be no i'm kidding they called her then she called you i still call that a hero we don't need another hero apparently it's currently that song but we got one so i flip a bitch as they say in the movies and uh and i and i'm not stoked but i go back oh i do jump out look even though i know for

sure and it was like bill squank my iron went oh this guy's gonna be yeah so i go back there and i go hey it's all good i'm famous everything's fine i'm famous that's what i do when i walk up to like a scene of a crime or a fighter or a car crash they got the tape i go it's okay every let me i'm famous it's okay i always do the same thing too if anyone any cop i go i know david i know david let me through let me through i did get pulled over here i think i said that our previous part coming up here going up the highway and then woo woo and the guy came around he looked at me you know this doesn't happen to me very often i was lucky he recognized me i was shocked we took selfies you go you know go a little easy on the pedal how fast was i going

200 no he said like it was a cheesy it was like 72 and a 65 oh you're not going to pull me over that shit so you go back and then what what's what's the mic drop on this what's the next twist i think this is known as fizzling out on a story so okay i've got a thirty second go there and the ladies there and i go hey i go we can flip my jump out i think she's gonna flip them and she just stands like a chewing her cud i go okay it's gonna be muscles so i pick their 50 ton bag i would have known it when i threw it in it was so heavy i go what you got in here kettlebell selection no wait what do you got in here kettlebell collection god dang i almost had it and then um what do you got in here baby's first bricks what'd you put in

your bag arnold sweatshinecker's i mean you got him trapped let me out here let me out of fear i'm in the wrong van i knew it the whole time i knew it the whole time Can I tell you my 30 second story? No, that's pretty fizzled out. I milk it, dry it. I don't like to fly like you. I've been in you in a turbulence where everything's bouncing. The cart's flying, hitting the seedling, and you're like just totally calm.

Me trust Mr. Pilot man. You're like a five-year-old. Pilot man will take care of us. Nobody gets too much. Too much information. So I get on a plane in Vegas, and then they come on and they go, and I checked the luggage, believe it or not. They go, we, this. plane is not going anywhere folks we're going to have to have you depart and we're going to have to

get another plane and and bring it here so usually when things go bad they stay bad when things go good they stay good so i go i got i'm getting off the plan i'm not taking i'm getting out of here so she goes well your bags are checked and going over there i'm getting out of here you know what i mean so she said all right no she did go okay you did the church lady or did you do the hollywood minute I did them both. And so she let you off the plane? She let me off the plane and she got, went down, found my bag and got it out to baggage claim.

Within five minutes, I have my bag. I'm not going to deal with the airport anyway. I've already called a travel agent. I have an SUV waiting for me. Within 12 minutes of sitting on the plane, I guess we're going to start flying pretty soon. I was on the freeway and I could see the plane. And they could probably hurt me, but I honed and flipped them off. Fuck it.

I was mad at them. Because they almost took you down. But I'm spontaneous like that. If the pilot said this. All right. Folks, we're going to. Patience. They always appreciate your patience.

Butchance folks. We are not being let. Like when I went to Arizona, I get on, I'm not feeling great, I get on, slam the door, I go, just let me get through this flight. I'm all cooped up, I don't love it, slam, sweating. I feel like shit for some reason, maybe hung over. And the second they lock us in, he goes,

I appreciate patient, folks. They're not going to let us take off. It's some sprinkles in Scottsdale, so we're going to sit here for minimum 45. And so you can't, don't stand up. Want an active tarmac. So Spade doesn't like that. He's freaking out. And then I'm doing some deep breathing.

Luckily, I bought little kettlebells. Have you ever had this serious question? I don't know if it's funny, but right as it's, maybe it's kind of weather or whatever. We're all packed in. We're going. And then writer's about to close the door. This guy comes up the aisle and he's got a water bottle and he's drenched the sweater. And he just bolts off the airplane.

And you go, what does he know? Oh, like final destination. He was clearly got spook, like, no, I'm not buying this. Cyber Monday just got smarter with Pura. Get 30% off curated sets and upgrade your home set with app-controlled fragrance that looks as good as it smells. Choose from hundreds of premium scents and diffusers. Mix and match your favorites and set custom schedules right from your phone.

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I didn't, you know, when my, probably two flights ago, this is getting extra boring, but so yesterday two. I don't love, he said something like, he's, he goes, we've got a little thing. I'm just going to have him come look. Oh, yeah, I remember I think I told you said five out of the six lights are on, but one's not working. Right. Deep plane. Anyway, enough of that shit.

Yeah, that's airplane stories. are airplane stories for you. We don't even have a sponsor with that. That would be a good long segment. We have a sponsor for it. What else happened, Dana? This is our, I just remembered the thing. I did a sketch on SNO once,

and this is our show after Thanksgiving. And Bonnie and Terry Turner really liked that. I think it did okay. You might have been in it. It was just about people, relatives, driving into your house for Thanksgiving. And there's a 25, 30-minute conversation about which highways they took. Oh, we went on the 280 to the 154.

And the other guy's like, oh, Jesus Christ, I was on the 101. And then I came down 19th Avenue. Who gives us shit? Shit, that one might have turned into the Californians because that was back in our day. But I don't remember that one. It was maybe. Yeah, that was pre-Californian. And so it's similar.

Like, they just talked about their boring way they got. there it is it is very true though yeah californians uh fred armison which i always said no you guys took it further he said he got it for me when i used to do that kind of dude in my act like was that dad that kind of thing yeah that's kind of like we were we were taking a core can you man it's funny yeah they make it even work corks screwed faith they make the weirdest accent that's really nothing and they try to outdo each other so it's just not even english God, Venice Bullerard. Really?

Goles? Yeah, it's so dumb. That was from fast times at Ridgemont was one of the first Sean Penn doing the Malibu guy. Spicoli, Sean Penn. Yeah, man, that guy has a lot of range. He was so good in that freaking movie. Well, Sean.

I know that, dude. He said so many funny things in that movie. Yeah. Now, what else? Tell me more. Did you see Wicked? Are you still in line? What are you doing?

it outperformed i was kind of happy for them what i did on a day uh where i just had a case of the fuck it's you know just want to turn everything off i'll go to like a matinee that is empty so the one that was playing at the time i wanted to go that was a fortunately empty was running man oh yeah you see running man i saw running man we talk about this already i i know but i saw it i now i've seen it and i had low expectations i enjoyed it i thought it was really fun you know i wasn't comparing it to anything else i i think it's a good popcorn movie glen pal handles the comedy and he can play the action so i thought it was good you know a big part of movies is not going in like this can be fucking epic you just watch

it and then you know you just see it running man I would just say this at this point of my time on the planet I like clicking the phone off and putting it down and watching movie and no one's supposed to talk and it was the theater was empty and it's just quiet for two hours I'm at this point they could show me anything I'd be kind of like I'm meditating or something theaters are good for that because it's really the only time you try to not look at your phone and just you can't really do anything else. When I watch movies at home, I told you, I started to watch Pluribus. Because it's a funny name. Yeah. I saw the first episode of Pluribus. I used it.

Pluribus. But don't tell me anything because I got through about half of it, but I'll finish it. Well, here's my question for you. Why do people see a movie that they clearly would never like? When the ticket prices, even for matinees are like 20 bucks, we went and saw the Springsteen movie, my wife and I and there's these two teenage girls right to the left down there they were utterly uninterested all they did was check their phones

it was bright light and they're just rolling they look up once in a while either born to run even if you're a fan that one's a strug how was it is it a bit of a snoozer I don't know I'm always giving them

the benefit of the doubt I think it's it was a little, it wasn't up. It was a little kind of, it was around a dark time of Springsteins. He wrote Nebraska, did it

on acoustic guitar in his room. I found it interesting and I thought Jeremy Allen White was really great. So I just saw how hard movies, you know, are to make. I'll just tell this to anyone listening right now. If you want to watch a great movie, it's called Heaven

Can Wait. It's with Warren Beatty, Diane Cannon, Charles Groton. We watched it again. the other night we'll see it every it isn't it good yeah it's so good and it's so charming and charles grodon darling put there the bumbling murderers and she's screaming and oh yeah james mason is sort like a god character it's just so good i would tie in midnight run to that because you said charles groden you talk about killing it midnight run yeah that's good that's another one of the best buddy two-hander movies comedy i mean i don't know talked about it's

enough that one really knocked me out um sometimes you see the jokes you go oh those jokes are kind of corny you go no this is where they started there's some movies where typical jokes started and you've never heard them before and then everyone has like a spin on it but that one had a lot i did charles groton for a while and actually did him on s and i guess hosted but he has such a dry dead pan he did have a funny you know darling darling you know oh what about foul play foul play another one chevy and goldie he was so good in that and so the unsung hero of that one because those two are so funny obviously here's an interesting thing about charles groan so he gets into the 90s and he kind of announces that just generally speaking i don't like making movies

you know sitting around being told what to do nah i don't like it he's brilliant in movies yeah and and then he goes and then he does a show i think on msnbc i like a little talk show And I go on it and he goes, do Johnny the whole time. So it was a 20 minute interview and I just stayed in Johnny Carson the whole time. Well, he is a bit of an odd duck because when he would do maybe Letterman and he would be like, he was kind of mad at Letterman. I never knew if these things were a bit and it made me laugh and I'm like, something's wrong. But even in the movies when I was younger, I didn't know when people were so deadpan. They were doing it on purpose.

I'm like, what's going on here? Yeah, I know. And Buck Henry. Stupid. Yeah. Oh, you know, it's a great movie. While we're doing him, I'll give one vote for Man on Fire. Drama kind of thriller.

What year was that? Denzel, Dakota Fanning. Oh, yeah. Chris Walken. It's kind of a heavy movie, like a Tony Scott movie or something. So cool. Denzel Washington is just, he's the coolest. Pretty safe bet.

He's the coolest because he's not really out there and he's just, he's. TikTok every day. You look at a jackass. The equalizer and he plays it so brilliantly. He's in a cave and he's got two guys with machine guns like this. He's got another guy with a gun on really got the gritty and he goes, all right, this is what's going to happen in 10 seconds. And he starts his watch and then it's so hysterical.

I know, I love it. He walks in, puts this little thing. The best is when there's bad guys in the room and like he comes in, they all see him and they're like Russians, drinking and they know there's trouble yeah and he goes i think you're in the wrong room friend friend does me by the way they don't mean their friends right and then he goes i i think it's time for you to go friend you don't want trouble he goes okay and then he goes back and he puts a stopwatch and then he takes the lock and goes click and turns around they all go what the fuck he locks himself

in that's a good that's a staple started and coward of the county song Well, not only is he going to kick their ass. He's going to time it for some OCD weird. They have guns and there's like 10 of them, 300 pounds, ready to, we must break you. All right. Okay. Is that what you're going to do? Is that, that's your plan?

Well, let me just check my watch here. Okay. I'm going to lock me selfie in. Yeah. And then they all wait to fight one at a time. You go beat up. Now I go. Okay.

Beat up. Oh, man. Why don't you do or I'll do it an action film? Because it's all just, all if you do is go like that and then sound effects. Yeah. I've seen it with sound off and they look so stupid. They're missing. You can't, you can see it's like not even really a good fight.

But when it's like, yeah, because you don't have to get close at all. If I was going to slug you on the face, you know, I could be a foot away. You just have to time it. I don't know if you'd be capable of that, though. How is your Thanksgiving? Dana, I don't know if you know what time it is, but it's time. I think it's iced for buzzing around on fly on the wall. This is sponsored by Five Hour Energy's new gingerbread snap flavor.

Tis the season for tasty caffeine with five hour energy shots that do what? bring they bring the festive vibes anywhere with portable resellable two ounce shot you got any local retailer amazon or www.5 hour energy 0.5 hour.com to order yours today so yes i'm going to give dana we've done this before right but i'm going to give you different people post thanksgiving Oh, Thanksgiving scenario is you. I have. Are you going to do Tony Montana? I'm going to do Tony Montana, and then I'm going to surprise you.

Okay. But this is not, I just have names. This is not scripted. I know. No. It never is. That's why it's horrible. Can people tell it's not scripted?

No, it's funny. I like it. All right. So this is Al Pacino Scarface, Tony Montana at Thanksgiving dinner. Here we go. Action. Look at his fucking face. Here's you, Dana.

Pass the sweet potatoes. Do I look around the table, man? I don't see any sweet potatoes. Why are you doing them? Adam Semler. What are you doing here? I heard you're in a Jack Kelly. You're a Jack Kelly?

Always in Jake Kelly. A faba, oh, hot, hot, hot, hot, it's sound like a baby. What a problem, man. Jay Kelly, you've got to get an Oscar, no matter of it. Who put your mic up, oh, Mike? Kelly, what's your doing? Jay Kelly, is the movies in the Netflix, continue.

Jay Kelly, why are you doing, man? No sweet potatoes. What about you? You take I'm Rob Schneider? You take the sweet potatoes, Rob Schneider. Okay, what's he going to say? No. Oh, yeah.

I like a Duce Bigelow, man. I like it, man. I see a movie. I see on Netflix all the time or Amazon Prime. I see a Duce Bigelow. You're a crazy guy. You run around like a crazy man, funny. Thank you.

Thank you very much. All right. What is this? Joe Biden, what are you doing here at Thanksgiving time? Where's the sweet potatoes? I'm not getting around. Where's sweet potatoes? He doesn't even know he's at Thanksgiving, probably.

David Spade. Oh, no. David Spade, you're a dandelion, man. I saw it on Amazon Prime, a dandelion. It's a good, man. A lot of jokes. A dandelion, I get the gist. Man, you make a lot of jokes.

You like to make jokes. Christopher Walken. What about you? What did I say? Oh, what do you say? Let me interview you. David Spade. Now I got you here.

No sweet potteros, man. You're like a little Danny lion? lion instead you eat a danly lion why you call your special danny lion hey it's rob again listen i saw you had cocaine there that's a pretty big line but guess what you can do it well i love what you say this is rob again all right this is tony montana again okay all right okay chris for welcome man you were in two episodes ago what you're doing this Five-hour energy. You shouldn't be in this episode.

You got to go, man. No! I told you, you gotta go. No! Don't go! You'll see why. So overstay is welcome a little bit. Oh, and Wilson.

God, there's a big table. It's a big a, it's a big a, thank you. We had to put the extra leafson. Okay. Sorry, man. don't have any sweet potatoes i don't give a fuck what's the fuss what the fuck is a matter where you they can't use it with a swear word so i said fuck you what the fuss rubs schneider adam sandler come off who what the fuck is that david i get the gist what's that you in the teachers

at the 50th you're phoned it in i get the gist take a brick you steal the fucking show what is that about me five-hour energy. I'm losing, I'm losing my impression. Listen, that was buzzing around. That was, yeah, it was. Next week, did they ever get the sweet potatoes? We'll find out that was sponsored by Five Hour Energy's new gingerbread snap flavor, fuel your holiday hustle with as much caffeine as a 12-ounce premium cup of coffee and zero sugar available in stores. Amazon or online at www.5hourenergy.com. Five-hourenergy.com. And that was written word for word not good I like these you can edit I like it no they're too good I like that I was able to go thought about oh I was able to go yes I was able to go oh I was telling you play

you question for you did me in there you surprise and I liked it I was in Phoenix and I shouldn't even say this but late bored I stumbled across an old window and I pushed the wrong button and it came up porn and it said what said you can't watch porn in Arizona what does that mean can you believe can you believe it and we don't know if this is a lie or if one you can't watch born in Arizona I couldn't how would they I gave up quickly because you know what they say you can but just type in your uh just take a photo of yourself and a photo of your driver's license i don't think so nice try where i'm sorry i didn't get the beginning where were you watching porn on what device

uh require an age verification now you can watch in arizona with me but some age verification prove you're over 18 you have to you have to prove you're over 18 and under whatever i I think that's kind of a good idea. I don't like kids looking at that. No, I don't mind it. I just, it kind of, you know, I go, what are we going to do for the next two and half hours, you know, play goddamn panda pop?

So anyway. Jesus. What are you, 18? Heather and I have a mutual friend. He's in Texas that he keeps saying, I can't get any porn out of here. I don't know. You got to figure, I'm not putting my fucking license. It tracked me on some, what is this, 2,000?

want a space odyssey i'm like well it's not really what you're looking for as an analogy but i get what you're saying so he won't do it and he's like i go you're going to crack one day and he type it in that goddamn number kiki cobs the governor made it in effect september 26 we got rat fuck who's going to go to arizona now have you ever watched porn and then stopped watching it and just you're in the hotel room by yourself he went fuck that was great I stand up like this yes yeah I will say once in a while I watch it then I you know as Kevin Nealyn says I'm interested I'm interested then I'm not interested whatever happens then I'm telling me I say good Ken walk back in your in your

laptops open light and you go oof what I don't know anyway you step out of that one anyway it won't affect you on the road don't worry it barely barely affect me it was just more funny I think it's hilarious and it gives us an insight into you not the comedian but you as a person so it's great for the podcast where you're opening up yeah I'm really opening up I you know holding the curtain back I'm an open book no I'm not okay let's get to a few stories and then we'll okay finish our leftovers Oh, these are fun.

I haven't seen them in case I have come up with a good ad lib. This is a Rogan clip. What they don't want you to know about history. Let's see. There's something really fascinating. Sure. There's old pictures of Christmas images that always include aminida muscaria mushrooms. So you would find them underneath pine trees.

The same way you find brightly colored presents under Christmas trees. In order to dry them, they would hang them in the trees. Ah, with care. The whole Santa Claus things where he's coming down the chimneys. Why was that? Siberian shamans were ostracized. They had to sneak into people's homes. So they came down chimneys.

Santa's a shaman. Also, Santa does the exact same coloration as the Aminida muscaria mushroom. Look at that Siberian shaman. Looks exactly the aminatamasker. It looks like an ornament. I don't know. I think Joe's reaching a little bit. They keep saying anamanarian mushrooms, which I've never heard of.

But I'm not a big schumer guy. I used to do it in college maybe. I don't do it. You're a swimmer? I did it. My friends and I, you know, younger people, we did some mushrooms. We were in front of the Queen Mary down there in Long Beach. So it's a thousand feet long and the smokestacks are, you know.

And so the mushrooms started getting into the mushrooms. They were looking at the pamphlet. We're out on the patio. And so to describe how big the boat was, they would just do ratio scenarios. like 400 antelope could make their home in that one stack. You know, it's like 12 million bumblebees could fit in the whole of this craft. 20 million jelly beans. And so we laughed our ass off for half hour.

We were so high on mushrooms. We came around the corner and there was this spruce goose next to it. And we saw this big white wooden plane. And it was so fucking huge. We dropped our knees laughing. So all we do is a laugh. But I haven't done it. I did laugh a lot on shrooms.

I have a quick joke about a cruise ship. This was from grown-ups one, I think. I threw this in, we got cut out. I said, we were all making fun of each other. And I said, Kevin James, he mentioned something about a cruise ship. I said, here's the captain when you're running laps on the cruise ship. Because Kevin James is so heavy, it alters the boat? He doesn't come around to that side.

And then he goes to front of the boat. as she goes he doesn't captain that seems he doesn't know what's going on because kevin james is such a big guy that he's okay that that's it's a good visual you know the guy doesn't know what's cool pop quiz did the captain the titanic actually go down with the ship or getting the lifeboat you know my friend was there um i was invited uh no i don't know what what happened He got in a light boat, got back to Manhattan. He was in a swimming pool at a Motel 6 and drowned. This is your act?

They didn't have Motel 6th is in 1907, I don't know, whatever it was. No, he was at a Holiday Inn green ribbon. I like to try to gussy up a holiday end. Oh, this is a blue ribbon, I know. Hey, man, I worked at a Holiday Inn for like five years. Dishwasher, busboy, waiter. And then, Cruner. You know this Richard Lewis joke?

No. I get to a hotel. I told him I wanted a suite. I was promised a suite. I don't have a suite. I have a regular room. I need to change rooms. The guy said, you're in a suite.

He goes, oh, my God, I didn't see the coffee machine in the back of the toilet. You're right. I apologize. I'm in a suite. I was in a sweet the whole time. I didn't see it. That's maybe not the best joke in the world. It is funny, though.

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next story bring it on i have stories but they're too heavy oh this is interesting have you heard about the baguga i've heard that name for some reason this is the little sphere when they say those fears somebody found him okay he didn't give it up to the police he kept it and now it's getting heavier it's got all these like hieroglyphics on it and people are coming to look at him read the symbols as a warning about the future i don't know if that's true they are not a prediction well then what's the they are the activation sequence for a technology that has been waiting for 12,000 years yep roughly 12,000 the message isn't what it says it's what it does show it that's all it was well what did they say press the buttons or

not because they have it floating you know when people see these circles floating something is they show them in the ocean. Now, I feel like AI was invented just to throw this off because you can't tell. But if you see these little spheres floating and they found this one, it crashed, the guy called the police and he goes, they said, give it to us. He said, no. And he took off. And it weighed about a pound. And now because of gravity after a few months, it weighs more. But all these scientists and UFO people are looking at it going, it's nuts what it is. They can't tell. They can't tell what kind of material it is. They have no idea. So something's Well, is it on 60 minutes or why is it?

I'm hiding it, Dana. No, some of these things are out there. It depends on your algo. If your algorithm brings in this. I want aliens. Let me just go on record. You know, I want aliens to come down. I want in my time on this planet to have like, we are aliens.

I want them to land of the White House lawn. I want them coming out like day there stood still. No doubt. One of Keanu Reeve? And Jennifer. No, no, the one from 1959 was unbelievable. Scary, yeah. That was the great thing where they had a guy.

They had like an Einstein scientist with the chalkboard doing the stuff. The alien looks human, but he's kind of weird. And he comes in and goes, well, Professor, I think you're mistaken. And it's like this gigantic equation, like 20 feet across. He goes, he's in one second. Yeah, oh, there. This X should belong here. And then the Einstein guy's like, oh, how much.

God. I mean, I can't. I am, you know, I love that in a movie, don't you? I like that reading of yours to talk for. God, good gracious. Good God. Why didn't I, how did you? Come together perfectly. I've got to call my wife. Wait, what? You just saw telephones. You never saw. Have you? And you, you thought, what? Come on. And he goes, oh, my God, can you help me fix my dryer? Is that the one where the huge alien is standing or is that the counter? No, a huge alien comes off to spaceship. I mean, it's a little corny.

I mean, he's metal and he's scary when I was a kid. But I think the rubber bends at his knees and stuff. But then, oh, I can't remember the name of the great actor who played the alien with a humanite form who, you know. It's great. Let's talk about age of disclosure by next. week because i'm going to watch it it's all about the aliens on um okay all right i got an open mind yeah open mind and then we'll get somebody maybe from there yeah if we're on this planet and no one knows how we got here or what we're supposed to do here all things are impossible i just wanted to

put that out there i do think it's all possible and i keep seeing videos on ring cameras of aliens and they all look like ai but some i'm guaranteed like one out of 20 is real but no one everyone's like whatever first comments i was like fucking they are you who are these friends who's that a those are comments those are in the californias i don't think it's not oh they are you hey man if this an alien people would see like big green ears or thought yeah aliens are cute uh i don't want them to us what's my favorite characters right all right i'm just adjusting my camera One more. I guess Arizona's an hour later, dude.

I left Arizona once and arrived in L.A. before I left because of the time change thing. Oh, yeah, there's an hour long time. What is a micropenus all about the condition that may have plagued Hitler and Jeffrey Epstein? They're really going out. These guys are really piling on. This is a great story. I just love this investigation. The Nobel Prize winning stories. This is a key body. Mm-hmm. Okay. Is this the whole story? They say, they say uh ebstein had one right well who are they danan when did you take this picture

start i thought he's like batman eyes like this that guy has the hands of chikilo deal yeah it could be big do i think you're supposed to measure it from your waist all right but these people that might grow i mean they're really going like i think where when they try to find a victim, unfortunately they say any markings on the wiener. Like that happened to Michael Jackson. Right.

And also the idea is that you know, Hitler was so angry because of that. Nizhnuf, van and insistent and all the micro-pornies. Adolf, you okay? I killed everybody.

and because the micropines. Yeah, yeah, made him so mad. Can you believe how much energy I had? He gave those speeches. He really gave it. I know, I know. That's what I used to do, exhausted Hitler. Oh, I can't, I can barely.

I'm so tired. I was screaming for an hour. Goering. I play gobo at once on one, uh, read through. And I go, Right away, mine, fear. And then I got a laugh. That's fine.

It's almost like a book movie or something. I'll be back in one second, mind. I'm so tired. I gave a four-hour speech at the Reichstead. Did you hear it? I can't feel my deltoid. Whoever thought of this thing should be shot? I can't even feel my traps.

What's a lever arm? Hard to hold up. I did this for five fucking hours. All right. Let's end on that. That is a mic drop. I hope you enjoyed your Thanksgiving vacation. Now it's time to get back to work.

Eat Thanksgiving, listen to this, and sleep. While you listen to us, because we're a good sort of. We're a good, we're a good casual. We don't want to stir the pot. All right, everybody, I'm watching. We've got millions of streams coming in. So good job, everybody. thank you and we'll see you next time goodbye hey guys if you're loving this podcast which you are

be sure to click follow on your favorite podcast app give us review five-star rating and maybe you can share an episode that you've loved with a friend if you're watching this episode on youtube please subscribe we're on video now fly on the wall is presented by odyssey and executive produced by dana carvey and david hather santoro and Greg Holtzman, Maddie Sprung Kaiser, and Leah Reese Dennis of Odyssey. Our senior producer is Greg Holtzman, and the show is produced and edited by Phil Sweet Tech. Booking by Cultivated Entertainment. Special thanks to Patrick Fogarty, Evan Cox, Mora Curran, Melissa Wester, Hillary Schuff, Eric Donnelly, Colin Gaynor, Sean Cherry, Kirk Courtney, and Lauren Vieira.

Reach out with us any questions to be asked and answered on the show. We can email us at fly on the wall at odyssey.com. That's A-U-D-A-C-Y-I-com.