Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade - RE-RELEASE - Robert Smigel

Episode Date: March 25, 2026

Let's revisit political correctness, Farley reflections, and a Triumph roast with Robert Smigel. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Coming back at you You know We will say this a lot But arguably the best sketch writer There's no such thing He's the best He's among the greatest comedy sketch writers

Of his generation And he's written a lot of movies With Sandler And so And he's our friend And it was just fun And does triumph the dog that's very orner.

Yeah, I think he does a lot of triumph. And Triumph actually, well, you'll see, it gets a little, it gets heated a little bit between us in Triumph. Oh, that's right. And also Smigel, didn't he, wasn't he the head writer for Conan for a while for the first show?

For the talk show he did, yeah, yeah. He was the head writer there and he's... He was one of my bosses at SNL because he was always in the room picking sketches with Franken and Downey and Lauren. So he always had a lot of poll. He does Night of Too Many Stars. I think that's for autism.

Right. It's his charity. He did the Dana Carvey show that lasted eight episodes with Dino Stappanopoulos. That disaster, yes. Steve Karel and Stephen Colbert. Whoops, All-Star. Louis C.K. Louis C.K. I hired as my head writer.

I mean, no big. He's did pretty well. All right, so here's Robert Smigel. We have a lot of laughs because we know him very well. Enjoy. All the momentum we had with the Lauren impression. Oh, we were, oh, yeah. And you were saying,

Lorne, you did an impression before that, before Dana got there. Mark McKinney, Mark McKinney did, the only person who did it in my first year was Mark McKinney, and he did like a beautifully accurate Lauren, like a well-observed, Lauren and actually said complete sentences. Yeah.

And it was very impressive. But then the next year, I just started doing cartoonie, Lauren on my own. And then I remember going into Dana's office. And, you know, and admitting that I sort of do Lauren, like, you know, I want to maybe the show and looks, I think, Dana. And then Dana's like, oh, yeah, I do Lauren too. And Dana starts going like, oh, what do you think of Acts 3?

just had that move like something Lauren's never done in his life I know a lot of things he never did incredibly it was just perfect it was like this self-satisfied we still have no fucking first act I've got no fucking first act

no fucking cold Marcy look at the book of Lauren please chapter two Frankenrider Bush Franken ride a bush Frankenwriter Bush there was a lot of bush cold openings.

Franken write a bush cold over. Remember Robert when you made the cartoon thing where you flip the pages? What was it you? Well, I was doing Bush senior so much. I didn't know that the writing staff was kind of like again. So then I saw a thing. Well, it's like a flip page where it was Bush taking a shit. Yeah.

And he spun it and see me as Bush. It was like a series of it was like one of those flip. Yeah. Like a silent movie. It was like was it Franken putting Bush cold open on the. I thought it was Bush taking a poo or something. I thought it was scatological. I like Frank and putting the card on the lineup.

I have to say Franken takes a beating on your show. He's coming. He's coming on very, very soon. And we will play him. Well, Sarah got him back by stabbing him in the head with a pencil. Yeah. Did you hear that one? Well, I read through.

I was not there. that was after I had left for Conan. But do you remember this? Spade, I bet you remember this. So one of the impressions, I was the one I think who started that, like me and Conan, I used to do this thing for Conan of Al.

And I feel bad because Al got me the job, actually. And I love Al, but he was tough back then. And so everybody kind of needed to release some energy. mine was like Al on his back and like a snapping turtle and it like a sketched flip me over yeah exactly I thought that's why he would when he was running for Senator I thought he'll be great in there because Al is blunt and doesn't he just says what he thinks

I thought that'd be good for him. He was great but on the but well the boy when he was in the Senate he was my hero because he he kind of like contained him from being as confrontational. Like, I mean, at the show, his last few years at the show, I think, I think he was kind of unhappy, to be honest with you. I mean, he was like in his 40s. And I don't think this is what he was dreaming of doing in his 40s.

And I think it was, I think that's in his defense. Like, he was confused as to what he wanted to do with his life. And then he started writing those books. And I think he found direction. Yeah, he's always hyper political. And that was fun riding with him and Downey because, you know, he had all these dreams and he's sitting next to spade at read through. And he's like, what happened?

It's like George Siegel and just shoot me. He goes, in the middle of a scene, he'd stop. And he goes, he'd look at the crowd. He goes, I did a movie with Elizabeth Taylor. And I'm standing next to this asshole now. Well, I remember Jan Hooks one saying to me, Schmeis, don't become one of those writers who's 50 years old and wearing blue jeans and sitting on. on the floor.

Flannel shirt. Whatever you do. It's always sitting on the floor with a no book. I mean, it's just you never grow up when you're at that show. And a little sachet where you put your bitterness in, a bitterness pouch. We're like, you just keep loading things in. And Al's defense. Didn't get update.

The show, I did six years. It gets mind numbing and it gets you're in a box of like no sun and pizza and ordering in and stress and everyone else's energy. And so you did a long run there too. You seem pretty normal, but that was a long run. You had. I did a long run that I got out when I was like 33 and to do the Conan show. And then I came back, but in a much more sane capacity, I just did the cartoons.

Yeah. And all I had to do was show up on Saturday. So I wasn't really a part of the thing anymore. But Al was like, you know, there every day. And he's like in his 40s. Where is Toronto? I'm right here. Don't miss the return of Marvel Television's Daredevil Born Again.

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now streaming only on Disney Plus. When West Jeffers took flight at, in 1996, the vibes were a bit different. People thought denim on denim was peak fashion, inline skates were everywhere, and two out of three women rocked, the Rachel. While those things stayed in the 90s, one thing that hasn't is that fuzzy feeling you get when WestJet welcomes you on board. Here's to Westjetting since 96. Travel back in time with us and actually travel with us at westjet.com slash 30 years. Well, let's get back to Smigel's unbelievable career. Do we want to be a little bit,

do we want to go a little bit to Young Smigel first? Would you like to go later? Young Smig, or what about, can my friend come on? Because he thinks Young Smigel's a fucking bore to be honest. Yeah, let me see. Who do you got over there? He's been, he's been riding me ever since you've looked at me about how. This is unique for Fly on the Wall. We have a guest with a special guest. You have a guest with a guest.

Great. He's just, I don't know. He just thinks that he can jazz it up, you know. He better behave. Should I bring him out? Bring them out. Why not? Okay. Oh, goodness. What?

Here I am. Here I am. Finally. God, Jesus Christ, what a long wait. No, this is terribly exciting. So exciting. I triumph. Do not make fun of this show or us triumph.

I did. Please. Oh, no. I understand. Those are the ground rules. No, no jokes about the show. No, no making fun of anyone. Okay.

Okay. No, honestly, this is a great show. Thank you. fly out of the wall. Not for me to poop on. No, no. Fantastic show. That's good.

That's nice. Fly on the wall, there's a lot of buzz. I hear around fly out. Yeah. Good job. Triumph. Thank you.

Yeah, the same kind of buzz flies make around my ass. You see because it's not as it attracts shit in the show. Yeah. That makes sense. You see the joke. You get it. Yeah, that took a turn, but I like it.

It's, it's what it's a switch. Sharoo. Yeah. It's called us. No, Spade. It's a great show. It fills a need, you know, because, let's face it, Saturday night live,

it hasn't gotten enough attention or retrospectives or anniversary shows. Right. I mean, honestly, I mean, just the other day, I was thinking this. After watching my best of Finesse Mitchell DVD, I was thinking, why? Why has SNL been written about only slightly more than World War II? Why? And today's show, my goodness, how did you land this guest? They hand up my ass.

Seriously, I'm worried. I'm a little concerned. This is your first season. You've already run out of people we care about. No, Smigel's a big deal. He wrote a lot of great sketches. Hey, sure he is. Everybody stay tuned.

We've got the fourth funniest guy from the DeBare sketch. And you have to explain what this sketch was to people under six. It's trouble. This is what you're looking forward to. You already did Sandler, Rock, Mike Myers. This is your future. This is pretending to be interested in questions like, tell me in coming up with goat boy,

which came first to you? The goat or the boy is it a boy who becomes a goat or a goat who becomes a boy? Our listeners really are 10 remaining listeners. No, there's more. We didn't get the news. No, I kid. I kid.

Oh, he's kidding, Dana. No, no. Your show's great. It's a very, very successful money grab. I mean, hit. You have like, how many subscribers? You've got like 400,000 listeners, right? Yeah.

I'm going to say yes. Not to this episode, that's for sure. But up to now. No, it even's out. All we can hope today is to beat Alan's Wye Bell's numbers. Numbers. And who better to host. Who better to co-host?

this show then Dana Carvey, one of the all-time greatest cast members on Saturday night. Thank you, continue. And then why? Why would you say that? It's almost as if you think

I'm going to hurt your feeling. No, I think it's a compliment. Exactly. Dana Carvey, one of the all-time greatest cast members of Saturday Night Live and David Spade, who was also on the show. That's it? No, Spades everywhere.

Spade is doing great. He's everywhere. but this is Dana, this is actually a boost for you. You know, audiences are connecting with you again. That's what's great. I only wish, Dana, that you did this show like 15 years ago. You know, when podcasts were starting and all the people you do impressions of were still alive. I have lost a lot of them. Now it's like, hey, folks, what would happen?

What if Ross Perot and Jimmy Stewart weren't rotting corpses slowly disintegrating. to the soil. I think it might go something like this. Yeah. Well, you're trying to be president. Yeah, like, can I finish one time? I'll just do it. There.

Listen to your act. It's like the audio six cents. I hear dead people. I'm sorry. Is this wrong? This is a podcast. You're supposed to, you're supposed to be complimenting each other.

That's what it is, right? I mean, yeah. That's what podcasts are. White people complimenting each other. Yeah, we need more. Old white people. We're pretty nice. Old white people complimenting.

Old white people compliment. I've got a theme song for you. Harmonize with me, Dana. Old white people complimenting. Old white people. All white people. It's very hard to do over Zoom. I just realized.

Yes. Listen, spade. Yes. I don't want to insult you. You've had an amazing career. Thank you. You had Tommy Boy then starring in a string of hits, sitcoms that no one remembers waiting for him to fake laugh. I'm laughing. Hey. And God bless Bernie Brilstein, right? He started the whole thing off, right? Great guy. Calling the creators of Just Shoot Me and gently coaxing Steve Levittan to hire his

client. You need a comic relief guy. I'm so sorry. No. I didn't mean to. No, that was hysterical. Easy trim. Snippity,

Dippity. No, I think we got to put people. We got to let them. No, that's, that's, uh, showed your thing. You did your thing. Did Triumph hurt your feelings? I need to know. No.

Not at all. A little bit spade. No, because I thought Triumph is a little older now and maybe he was not like that anymore. No. No, it's like, I'm older. That's the problem. Like, I didn't give a shit about this when I started trying. I know.

I liked old white people complimenting other old white people or something like that. We looked it up. There's 2.8 million podcasts. Are you kidding me? It's like, it's like COVID. It's just there's more every day and no one knows what to do and people are getting affected with it. Here's what I've observed about this one because I've listened to a few. Okay.

And what's very funny to me, Spade, is like you're one of the funniest persons in the this is an old white person compliment. Yeah. Old white person. But on this show, it's all about a life you lived when you were like in the 90s and you kind of have to revert. You're always reverting to that guy at the show who hadn't made it big yet.

Oh, yeah. Like, always like, yeah, no, you guys were incredible and I didn't know what to do. Right. It's just funny to me that Spade who's had this amazing. run well it does when we throw back everybody gets back in that around the writer's table and how fucking

ordering Huxleys and all the stupid shit it sort of throws you back to the dim lighting and I'm feeling like shit all the time it was a stressful do you consider it I would say like I love the show so much and people I met and worked with and yet I was always stressed yeah I also remember how skinny

your little office was like I think people thought it was some palatial place it's these little dungeons and then I would go along the line and poke my head and to see if I get my name on anybody's sketch smaggle do you remember do you remember what I my affectionate nickname for you was no what was it spudley no well everybody had spudley into the noodles no chief not and show chief not in show because I was never in the show it's so whole I wasn't in much I I think I went. You got in it in 93, four, five. I did go.

Once Dana left. Well, that's what was weird. The thing was. Because you were kind of pigeonholed. I remember your audition. Yeah. And you were very funny,

but you were kind of like spade light. You weren't like letting your whole kind of persona. But that developed later. Yeah. And people like saw you as like this nice looking kind of blonde guy who did some impression. I think you did Tom Petty. Yeah.

It was like, oh, he's going to be like a Dana. Carvey type. And then, and Dana Carvey was still on the show. So I think people didn't know what to do with you. I think I didn't, but I also wasn't in full disclosure thinking I was the new Dana Carvey. I was like, are you this guy's the best guy and he does a million things. I go, I got to find what I can do. And luckily like even that Hollywood minute where Lauren, I was sort of teetering. And then he's like, well, just do more stuff like that because that makes me a little different from Dana. And then I could find my own little niche or something. I don't know. It was tough. That part was tough. Even the receptionist, which was like the best sketch of that season. Oh yeah. I remember someone in a high position saying, yeah, could Dana play that? No shit. No, of course he could. I came in and played an alien, right?

Did I play an alien in that? I felt bad because I said, you know, it's always hard, if you're a writer and if you're a new writer, to put Mike Myers or Dana in something where they don't have a lot to do. But, you know, in your head, you're like, oh, it would be fun. I have access to all these great people. And I don't know. They're quietly going, that's not that great. But Dana goes, yeah, I'll do whatever. So I go, you come in at the end as an alien. I don't realize they're going to put them in like three hours of makeup and hair. Remember you had a big bulbous head on? I had a giant thing. And I was like, oh, no, I can't put Dana through this shit. And it also makes sometimes. That was part of being on the team. Yeah, yeah. You know what?

I have to say no one complained. And it still gets into crazy outfits and says two lines and a sketch. I liked on the 40th anniversary, Steve Martin goes in full King Tut outfit for three lines in a song or whatever because he's committed and it's fun. I love it. And everyone's there. And it's also like 70 million people are watching that one.

Yeah, it's all different. Yeah, you're right. Everybody's yeah, yeah. But yeah, the receptionist, I mean, it's, it was so exciting to see a new person kill too. Like that's one of the great things on the show. when that happens. Like that guy, James, when he did Trump for the first time this year. Yeah, he was great.

It was like thrilling, you know? It was amazing, yeah. And when the audience finds it, because I had been sort of kicking around the show for a while, and that was a hard one to get on. I think it took a few swings. Oh, the receptionist? Yeah, and then it got on with MC Hammer at 5 to 1, and then the next time it got on first sketch.

With Roseanne. Yeah, with Roseette. There's really, there was only like three, so that's the one you remember. It's like, bye, there's only two of them. But, you know, if they remember what they remember, you know. Church Lady was on more than 20 times the first season. Oh, my. More than they had shows?

Were you on twice in a show? I would do an early chat and then I do a good night chat. After a update. Jack Handywood pitching. We tried to sneak the church lady into commercial. Remember that? Oh, yeah. For real, we did that.

We were like, can we superimpose the church lady or George Bush over a commercial? Were you allowed to use that stuff on a day? on Dana Carvey show? I technically, because of my contract, when I came in, I owned the church. That was very different back then. You could like write,

you could write a list of the characters that you created before going to Saturday Night Live. And Dana had a long list. And so, yeah, nowadays it's the complete opposite. Like they own everything. And then you have, like after seven years,

you have to do movies with the, I don't know. Just do a mandatory movie. I know. When you do movies, you go, back to the show, it is different. You do commercials and movies and you miss shows and you go back in the show. It's pretty cool for the cast. Yeah, it's really. Yeah. Now, that's true.

Now, yeah, leading up to this 50th, they're all, they're all, they're all, they're all, they're all, they told me. They, they told me, my manager said, right on the flight out there, write all your characters and give them to Jim Henry and I'm sitting there with a blank piece of paper on a Delta going, I don't know, what character is what are you fucking talking about? I'm a stand-up. So I'd go, skateboard crazy guy, talks with the Lisp, you know, I'm just like, making up something in case I write it one day or in case it sounds like a sketch I do and it clicks. Anything like, yeah, you need a man or thing. But Robert, do you want to talk about some of our hits?

Your big monster hits. You and you. Well, you know, Dana. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I mean, Dana, so I was there for a year before Dana. And then I got in an 86 with Phil and Jen and Kevin and Demet. and he was like someone I had I connected with what I loved about Dana was that he spayed you'll

understand this like generally like passive aggressive behavior rules at that show like I was great at good I could possibly no my sketch is terrible don't put my sketch on it couldn't possibly me I'm I'm being paid like that's what and then there's people like love it who are like what's going they're anti-Semitic. That's why the sketch didn't make it. You know why they cut it because it's funny. It's too good. It was too funny.

That's why they didn't put it on. Yeah, I was John. I was sadly a little closer to John. I was like, Robert, do I have no poker face. Lauren,

I remember him telling me. There were people like me. I didn't really make big stinks, though, but I was, you know, imitating Lauren behind his back, like everybody eventually. Now everybody, I'm told you go to the show now.

everybody does learn. Literally. Literally. Literally everyone. You've seen this? Have you witnessed this? Well, that's what I heard.

James Austin Johnson had a good one, you know. Oh yeah, yeah. Bill Hader, of course. Any reason. No, but I think people, they say that people just do it around the office. Oh, just around you hear each other.

Readthroughs going to start. Everyone get to their seat, you know, and that's like a first year cast member. Right. But what I loved about Dana was that he had. he just came in. He had a list of impressions that he, like, handed out to the writers. Like, he wasn't,

he didn't pretend that he was above doing that. Right. Which was, like, so refreshing to actually admit that you care. Yeah, I guess. He was just being straightforward. I just thought it made sense. I was able to do a bunch of voices. I thought, well,

let the writers know because I realize you guys are just writing sketches and if someone sees Casey Casey Kays or something. and maybe they'd put them in. I don't know. Of course. That's the best way to do it. Here you go. Here you go Jack Handy.

Here you go Odin Kirk. Here you go Conan. Robert, you approach me with, was Robin Leach doing some kind of Japanese pruning or origami. I don't know why. I don't remember. Yeah, because you'd seen his name on the list. But I had a catchphrase for that one. I'm Robin Leach.

I'm yelling and I don't know why. Right. So I had that. I loved Robin Leach. But then it was changing. For everyone under 70. No. But Rob Leach was a change.

The host of lifestyles of the rich and famous. Another one of a celebrity that is no longer with us, one of my impressions. You know, Dino Stappinopoulos, who our listeners might know, every time someone I do an impression of passes away, he texts me. Another one down, whether it's like, sorry guys. Regis or Bush, you know. You're going to kill in heaven, Dina, someday. Yeah, yeah.

So well, I didn't know Dino did that. I thought Robin Leach was so hilarious and he had a great hook for it. I don't know. Oh, no. No, everything, Dana, I thought Dana's Travolta was hysterical because it was so, it was so not what Travolta sounded like in the 80s anymore. No, it's just like he's basically doing an exaggerated. Welcome back, Carter, you know. Welcome back, Cotter for everyone listening.

The key to that. If you want to do, John Travolta, just say the word weird. Slack's so weird. Slacks so weird. Weird. Yes, is the entry to that. Slack, but also slack. What's that?

that. Well, it's like, Dana would say slack's so weird. It's so weird. You know, everybody should just like whatever they want to be very much connected because we liked and doing, we like doing impressions that were kind of abstract. We like creating abstract impressions. And so, you know, Dana had some under his belt, obviously. And then I tried to help him with, you know, Johnny Carson and Regis. The Regis thing was very strange. Because like, I wrote it for Phil Hartman. I wrote it for Phil Hartman and it went to dress. Really?

Didn't do great. And then Dana in his gentless non-cutthroat way just happened upon me like a week later and was like, you know, Regis is kind of small and Irish. And like I had just had a total blank. I had just picked Phil because he was the oldest cast member. Yeah. And I thought of, I thought of him as just, okay, he's the old guy comparatively. But Dana was absolutely right.

looked more like Regis and then he started doing him and well I didn't realize when I started watching the New York he had essentially just just got on nationally but we would get up around nine paula and I and we would watch it and we just fell in love with him oh yeah and then when i'm the charming guy in the world and then getting to know you yeah just hanging out in your office so we started you know bouncing off oh you ready for this you about a control this guy's crazy and you got all the i think one of your things very robert smigel or something about you know i'm doubted the writers and I'm behind Brocah. I can't get a seat, you know.

So we barred it over all that. It was that thing of like the explosion. This was something that he really did on the show. Broca's got the front row seat and I'm sitting with, you know, Patrick Swayze in the back. Anyway, it was a great event. And he takes a suit of his coffee. Anyway, it was terrific. It's like he's got nothing else.

So he just goes to. Joy was there. Anyway, we wished them. Oh, yeah. When Joy hosted that was always. Regis was working. But you can't let Dana

around an impression. He comes circling. It's like, all right, just give it to him. He's going to figure it out. And then his, when he wrote his book,

they said, we want to call it, I'm out of control. And he had to go out. You know, honest to God, I never said, I'm out of control.

That was something that Dana made up. Dana got he made up, but I don't understand. Dana Garnie. But, um, the,

you know, one, so we had, you know, and then Carson came around. Oh, yeah. And just,

I started playing around with it. I think the Turner's actually had written a Carson sketch. Did they? And I looked at it. You showed it to me and I had just a couple of moves in my head. And then it sort of brought out some moves that you had. Like the thing that I love Johnny Carson so much. He was like incredible voice.

In the 70s, when I was a teenager growing up, I used to watch him constantly. And he was so charismatic. and he's still the greatest ever. But there was, then Letterman came on in like the early 80s. And it immediately got some, you know, the anti-top show or whatever you want to call that. Well, he was like reinventing everything. And then Johnny, for no good reason, started feeling insecure about it.

You could see it on the show because he started trying to do things that Letterman was doing. But he didn't know how to do it the way Letterman did. Letterman would just let them happen. Johnny would be like, we're about to do something that's a little weird. This is a little different. This is not the norm.

That's right. You know, you're going to walk over. We're going to take a camera and it's going to follow me. I can't do them as well as you do it. But it was like, just clench your jaw.

You know, clench your jaw. Thank you. Clench your jaw. The camera is going to follow me and it's going to walk out of the studio. And I'm going to go to another set. It's like, okay.

Ask unusual questions to people. Ask unusual questions that people are not going to know is even, they don't know what's going to happen. All right. So let's start doing it. Now I'm walking. You see? I'm walking across. And this is a bit.

You were witnessing a bit. It's a little weird. And so that was giving him this a little weird. And then I had this expression. He had a couple of things. Like when Johnny like calls people over to the comedians is a funny stuff. Funny stuff. That was funny stuff.

And then you had weird wild. Weird wild stuff. And for those you at home, you're watching a thing called a television. You know how you would bring the audience? So then it became that where we just did the overly set up Johnny Carson thing. And then it was so dry. It was maybe the driest thing you ever did on the show, Dana.

And then, but it always Ed McMahon's, Ed McMahon's rhythmically kind of, uh, acknowledging it and, um, you know, giving it like,

just like, yes, you are, would always make it work. It was like the fact that you would say these strange things and then Ed would kind of affirm them. Yeah, he was the release button. But that was the first time, and I've said this before, but when I was on SNL and

wasn't concerned with the laughs. I just was having so much fun being Johnny. And when I got the wig on, I am Irish, Carson, Carvey. My eyes are a little close together. And I go, God, I kind of look like him, you know. And then I could just look in the mirror and just, just get into that attitude of being just this whatever that earn is.

weren't you going to hair and makeup too? It's just, that was great. Sets you up. And then the third rail of the ones that really had a lot of episodes. Carson did Carcinio. We could talk about that too.

Regis had a lot of episodes. I love to talk about Carcinio anyway. Well, Carcinio, let's do that now. Only because that was the extension of the Carson impression. Well, we did this. We did one before that. They actually did piss Johnny off.

And then they, I don't know, I don't know if they asked you to do that late night history show, but they asked me. So I did it and I talked about it. And then they edited it to make it look like we didn't really give a shit how Johnny responded to it. And we did. We were really upset about it. Like we did this sketch where Arsenio.

So Chris Rock gets hired in like 1990. And plays Arsenio Hall. Yeah, which he didn't do. Like I remember, that's another guy. I got to see audition and he was hysterical and like obviously, you know, an incredible obvious hire. But I remember asking Lauren, does it matter? He doesn't seem to be an impressionist.

Here to our shin, you know, it was that. Don't worry about Chris. He's got the hair and he can do our sineo. Just remember, it's like black guys on the show always had the burden of having to do like every black person. Yes. We talked about that with Chris, yeah. Oh, you did?

A little bit. I think David brought it up. Yeah, it is tough because everything just gets a sign and no matter, you know, if it's even close. Okay, Chris, you're doing Al Roker this week. Exactly. Yeah. I played an Asian character. I played Tony Montana as like a Cuban character.

You know, I had a bigger, you know, range. I wonder if you could write that, Robert, today is like, can you write anyone to play anything but they all? they are. I don't know how they do it there. I wonder if they have meetings and go, could I play this or? Oh, at SNL.

Yeah, at SNL. Well, they definitely let women play men. Men. Yeah. They still let that happen. No,

I know. It's, it's interesting because like, even like something like, I mean, I totally, blackface thing is obviously a red flag. And it's oddly,

it's something we didn't do in our era. Never found it happening at all. Yeah. The 90s were a strange time where it seemed like the floodgates opened and people were doing exceptionally rude stuff. I don't know if it's because cable was starting and the networks felt the need to compete. But you try too hard and you go in different directions that are sometimes wrong directions. You just don't know. And then it levels out.

Yeah. But like I just did this puppet show that failed, whatever. And we had this guy who was going to do Obama. And he had done Obama on the Conan show for like three or four years. And he just sounded exactly like Obama. So I wanted to hire him. And then I found out that he was white. I didn't realize.

I had no idea. I just knew he sounded exactly like Obama. And they said, you can't hire him. Did they ever call you now, smile to write or help or come off the bench and, no, I was there when Adam,

no, they never call me. They, they, although I actually. sent Colin Joseph an idea this week. Didn't hear back. Didn't hear back.

No, it was an AnaWintour idea. I thought. Don't try to give him my Racky Pete. That's Adams. Actually, you would be great for this on a winter idea. Is that me playing him or Dana? No, I'm talking about Spade. It's a very,

Hey. Spade could own that. Spade playing on a winter. The idea was that she, it was like an update, feature where on a winter is sitting next to somebody like who's the guy Jared Letto. He's always wearing something insane. They just had the Metagal gala.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Jared Letter. Yeah, he's got great fashion. And then it was just going to be on a wind tour very quietly and dryly and very stiff, uh, insulting, you know, um, Michael Chase's outfit, Michael Chase suit, you know, like, uh, is this a fundraiser for victims of fashion? and then like, you know, and then she turns to Colin Jost as like, you know,

is that a suit or are you being humped by a couch? And then she starts getting rim shots and just starts walking into the crowd and start walking around. Yeah, walking around the 8th. That's funny. Stands up and starts doing crowdwork. But she's completely stiff, you know. And it's just if that time was any louder,

Molly Matlin could hear it. Looks like Joseph A. Bank made it tonight. What if Triumph was at the Met Gala? Yeah, what would he do? You're crazy. Actually, I've tried to. I've wanted to do the right part of the Met Gala. That's perfect.

That's one of the few things I've, I still want to do as trying. Please don't let Triumph around Kim Kay. Well, she lost 16 pounds. See, now I have like these personal relationships that I care about. Like, I would never touch her because. Pete Davidson's a friend Oh, friend of the show No, he's a great guy.

I know him, but like Dana, this is something, well, we never talked about the Carson thing, but this is another one that's all right. I don't know if you want to talk about this, but I'll talk about anything. We're 30, or I'm 30 or 32 or whatever you were,

and Dennis gets bounced from his syndicated show. Yeah, and I have this idea to do, Dennis is now doing a cooking show. Right, which we, We called Dennis and he said, go ahead, right? We did call him?

I thought that I did call him. Yeah. But I still like, I believe I called him. Yeah. I don't think we, but that was like then. And I thought in my head,

I was like, this is my duty as a Saturday Night Live sketchwriter. I can't play favorites. You know, I, this is my privilege to work. Duty comes first. Yeah,

that's how I seriously I took it. Allegiance to the show. I would say by like the time I was 40, I was like, No, I would never do that again. Well, I don't think at that point there was any sort of idea that Dennis wasn't on his way with a career. Like he'd done the Black and White special. He had the talk show.

You know, Dennis was a star. All he did after that was host an HBO show that got like 20 Emmys. Exactly. So to me, to me, I thought it was so funny. And the way you wrote it, Dennis's vernacular in a daytime cooking show. I don't know if you could quote some of that. I mean, maybe you're right, but I feel like I still wouldn't do it now. I wouldn't be able to.

I'd be too nervous about whoever's feelings it was. Sure. I understand that. I feel the same way. I like, I kind of sometimes feel bad for Biden when I see him sort of lost or whatever. And so it's different doing it now. It's weird when you get older and life kind of kicks you on the nuts and you learn what pain is. Yeah.

You get more and better. Well, you know how careers are so hard and up and. and you're like, I'm going to probably hurt someone's career somehow accidentally. You know who would always... Biden's hair looks like a spider web. Go ahead. The one person who would always scold me when I was, even when I was younger, and I guess it's because he was sensitive to all the bad reviews he was getting was Sandler. He was like, like I was doing those cartoons and they were going really well.

Yeah, yeah. You know, and I would do a cartoon about like David Brenner or something. Yes. Being a guest on a talk show and it was fun with real audio. And I would use a real David. David Brenner's story, but I would have him going on every talk show and each host would get bored and press a trapdoor button and he would fall down and go like, you know, so he starts on like the Tonight Show and then trapdoor goes down to Conan and then it goes down to like Tom Snyder and then. I remember that one. Yeah.

Yeah. And it was really funny. And everybody, I played it for Conan because Conan was in it and he was laughing really hard. And then I get a call from Sandlin, you feel good about yourself, bud? You feel good about that? No. What if that guy's home watching? You know, he's like at a hard day and he's watching the show and he's like,

yeah. What is this? Why? What did I do? Yeah. Why? He did Brenner, didn't he? Sandler could do Brenner on the show.

He did a great David Brenner. That's right. But it wasn't nearly as mean as this cartoon. No, it wasn't mean. It wasn't mean. It was a funny impression. Remember the one you did where you had, you had Stedman hiding from Oprah in the mansion or something? Oh my God.

That was from the Comedy Central show. And it's in. interesting, you bring that up because that was a cartoon I wasn't going to do. It was one of those lines that I would draw for myself, which is people are always shocked. You had limits? I did, but I like, I didn't like to make fun of drug addiction. I always felt like when people are, you know, that desperate. It's not funny ultimately.

It's like, you know, everybody, it's easy to reduce somebody to a cartoon character. but that was one. And another one was women's looks. I really hated making fun of a woman for her looks because women are held up to these ridiculous standards. And it just felt shitty. And so this Oprah one was Andy Breckman's premise. And the premise was that Stedman, every time Oprah wants to have sex, Stedman has convinced Oprah that he's an international spy.

and every time Oprah wants to have sex, Stedman pretends he's getting an alert and he has to go off. I'm not making it sound as funny as it. No, no, it was so funny and so I like it. I broke the rule because it was just too funny and it remains like one of the funniest cartoons I've ever been involved in. But it was Andy Breckman's idea. Also, one of the nicest people I've ever worked with, Andy Breckman.

Well, definitely. this idea that I thought was to me. Ask him about the bears. The bear's the big one. I love it because Farley was in it. I just want to say very quickly that I know that John McLaughlin, which you completely created, loved our sketch. Oh, yeah.

Regis loved it. Perrault loved it. George Bush, Senior, loved it. Yes. And it was only sweet Johnny Carson got a little tweaked. And I don't blame it. So Johnny Carson, we should talk about this one because it was like, so, yes, so Rock comes on. I got, I'm sorry.

Oh, Carcinio. Rock comes on and plays Arsenio. Rock comes on and plays Arsenio. And this was at this time when Johnny was getting sort of threatened by Arsenio's presence, Arsenio was white hot. That's a bad choice of words, I suppose. But Arsenio was like, on fire. Everybody was talking about him.

And we did that thing of like, now, I understand that this, you know, that would over explaining thing. But in this case, it was like, I understand you have a show. Dana, you should do it. You remember. I understand. You have a show and it's, um, and it says here, he was like looking at his notes. It says here that your show is up against my show.

Yes. And I said, I did not know that. And your ratings have actually gone up higher than mine. And mine are starting to decline. Right. That's weird. I did not know that. And now it says here, it says further that your show is considered hip.

and mine, I am starting to be considered out of touch. Yeah. Did you know that? Yes. Yes. Yes. A really sad yes. Yes.

But the thing that Johnny got maddest at, Dana, do you remember this? It was the first guest. We had to throw away first guest before we bring on Arsenio. It was Susan Day, right? It was Susan Day. And I had written it for Chenate O'Connor, for Jan Hooks to play she had already done it and it was hilarious and she's very serious and you know you guys are just would be doing not a not a lot of hair on her head that's is that is that is quite a boom

you know all that kind of stuff a little smooth smooth on the upper turf yeah yeah not a hairy woman sir from ear to ear not a lot going on Lauren was like uh you know she's done she does a killer Susan Day, which she had done once on the show, and it was killer. So Lauren suggested, it wasn't like it wasn't funny. He suggested what if he has Susan Day on, but he keeps wanting to talk about the Partridge family. And it had been 15 years since it'd gone off. Yes.

And so that was how we wrote it. And then Johnny took it as like, are you seeing this? Ed? He said this on the show. They're saying I'm senile. He literally thought. thought we were now calling him senile, all because we had changed that opening. That was the one that I thought was, yeah, yeah.

He said it on, he said it as Dana or the real, no, no, Johnny said it on his own show. He started, wow, wow, bitching about Saturday Night Live on his own show. And Dana, I heard you say this to Regis and it broke my heart because I had never heard this. you said to Regis in an interview like, I don't know, five, six years ago I saw. You said that you heard that Johnny said when they start making fun of you, it's time to go away. Well, he would say it over in Burbank, because in the hallway, the big giant studio and just yell it out. They're making fun of me now. It's time to go.

Yeah. But what I realized and I would take it for anyone in show. business that eventually you become a caricature of yourself if you're a comedian. It doesn't matter. I don't want to name the person. You could see someone and kind of go, is that a celebrity impersonator or is that the real guy? So you do become a caricature of yourself.

It's kind of flattering. But, you know, for Johnny, I couldn't get on the show after that. I know. Nobody from SNL did for a year. And he really took it, took it to heart. And so that is heartbreaking for us. But then I think I also heard from you back then. So then we did the Carcinio sketch,

which was basically Johnny as trying to be like Arsenio. Trying to be like Arsenio Hall. And it was a big hit sketch. He had the pointy hair and he had elongated fingers. Yeah. And he would, do you see this head? All you have to do is go whoop, whoop, whoop. And the audience goes whoop, whoop, who.

Do you know that a house is called a crib, Ed? Did you know that? Yeah. I did not know that. Yeah, yeah. You know, Robert, I did Carson two months before he quit as stand-up. Oh, wow. And he came back to the back.

And he goes, who hates Dana Carvey? I go, I do. And he goes, that's my boy. Really? No, he didn't. He came back and said, hide to me. But I remember it was very odd to get on the show. I did do it two months before he got off.

And he did come back. But he came back. And you were on Saturday Lives. You broke the code. No, I think, was I on? Like, he went off in 93, I believe. You were absolutely on the show, Dave. Yeah, okay, okay, for sure.

But let me just say this real quick. Carvey told me that he liked the Carcinio sketch. Yes. He said, would he say it makes fun of both of them? You know, they're making fun of Arsino as much as they're making fun of me. I mean, that's funny stuff, you know, that kind of thing. So I remember feeling a lot better about, and then he did start letting people on the show again. No.

I mean, I was saying I got on somehow and I don't know, just to did my crummy act and got out of there. Stop it. He did. He waved me over, Smig. That's amazing. And I left. I didn't go. You gave him the finger?

Well, the guy backstage, McCauley said, he goes, get on there. Hit your mark and get off. And I go, what if Johnny waves you over? And he goes, he won't. Just go do it. And I go. Oh, my God. So I went out and turned and left.

And he goes, there he is. and what did the little double tap and the wink he goes Martin Short was with him and he goes have him come over and he goes I'm trying to but he won't look at me and he goes he's too nervous all right there he goes

all right well that was David's fate he said that on the air yeah that's amazing and then he came backstage where were you and I was fuck were you there with egg I had my shirt off

you made a fucking fool yeah and it was a B0 fucking torrential storm back in my room because I was so scared I had my shirt off and I have peptobismo and they knock and I open it. It's Ed, I think, Doc and Johnny, and he goes,

all three of them. I did, yeah, he goes, I didn't get a chance to say, good job. I wanted to come over and nice job. And I go, oh, I didn't even see you or whatever. And he goes, Pepto-Bismol, I'm trying to quit the stuff myself. And then he walked away. Isn't that great? It's a fantastic story.

He did a bit. He did a bit, but in reality, he was broken in. inside and he went around the office and said when they start not not coming over to the couch who put you up for this Dana Carvey that fuck so it's you spade yeah you're the one who pushed him out let's go let's go Ed let's go back and find him don't come on let's go I'll hit him high you hit him low hit him well talk about McLaughlin too because we that was a great McLaughlin group John McLaughlin ran a roundtable. Well, we got to have everyone know you did McLaughlin.

You did DeBer's so many. You did Clucky fucking Gagagaggooey. Hey, what did you help me? You helped me with the Clucky or were Schmitzge? You helped me with one of those two. I was almost in Schmitzke for a rough draft and then it went to Sandler and Farley. I know. It went to far.

That was downy's idea and it was a brilliant call to take the two youngest guys in the cast and make them the guys. That was all. What was I? Was I older than them? Originally I had it as Dana and Kevin, because I thought this is going to be the first sketch of the year. And Dana and Kevin are the guys. And then I don't remember a draft with you. I remember someone. Maybe Shoemaker or someone said, I think you're in this thing.

Remind me what this sketch is. Schmitz-Gay? Oh, Schmitz-Gay. That became a film, didn't it? That was a big one. Yeah. No, no. You're thinking of the ambiguously gay duo?

No, I was a commercial parody. Sandler and Farley did something by a pool. Yeah, with Van Halen music. It was a parody of all those So that was, you know, sexist Beer commercials. It's one of the ones I'm most proud of. Oh, it's great.

Asterical, but that ended up being salern and far. The gay people weren't like portrayed in any kind of like mocking way. Right. The whole joke was turning the tables on these objectifying, these ridiculous commercials that associate beer with objectifying women. So funny.

It just got this huge. it got one of the biggest responses. Oh, it's so great. Ed was a good. Aynne song in it. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. And Farley and Sandler doing the conga line.

Yeah, it was amazing. But Spade, I thought you either helped me with that or cluck and chicken, which is my personal favorite. Oh, cluck and chicken. I don't know. I mean, sometimes I just get in there and try to help anywhere I could. I think you threw me some jokes in that. Maybe I threw you, Gaga, Gagooly. That sounded like me, the God, Gaga, Gagoole.

Got a fucking, oh, I love a Sandler's voice and that was so funny that was a cartoon that was half cartoon commercial parody. Yeah,

cartoon, yeah, cartoon super, that's how I met the guy JJ Settlemeyer who ended up doing the first few years on this TV Funhouse

Cartoon. Dave, baby, a five house. Welcome back with my show. But you put Lauren's voice in there to anyone

say anything. That's maybe the hardest I've ever laughed in my life. because I became a 10-year-old again. Like, the way I would, when I was 10, I would draw cartoons of my teachers, that kind of thing. Yeah. And when a teacher would see, I would like giggle like, and I remember the first time you saw the dress rehearsal that the ambiguously gay duo ran.

And then this little cartoon, Lauren, comes out and chases the dog, Lego my show, Lego my show. And I'm watching Lauren watch it. Oh, my God. And I'm just in tears. I was like, you know, Lauren would call it, you put a beanie on the boss. You put a,

what is that? It's just made fun of the boss or a beanie on the boss? It's like reducing the boss to a, you know, lower status. It's like, you know, Lauren had a term for every comedy move in the world.

Totally. I've seen every sketch four times, you know, so it's hard for me. Everything you've, anyone's written. I've seen a version of it. One of my favorite recent Lauren ones within the last five years around funny people,

people who do comedy, there's only 900 of us on the planet. Oh, really? Yeah. So a specific number. Like, well, maybe that's true. I don't know. We did run some numbers. It's down to 898.

Yes. If you don't count Steve and Marty. Steve counts for three. Marty, he counts for 100. I think, Robert, we asked them. Didn't we ask. William Shatner, if he was okay with that sketch you wrote, I think he was, right? Oh, yeah, I pitched it to him.

And he liked-Trekke sketch. Yeah, that was a big famous sketch that you wrote. That still resonates all the time. That's a big, big one. Well, I have an affinity for nerds because I was an SNL nerd. I was as big a nerd as anybody. I was completely in awe of the show when I got there. I like knew who Edie Baskin and Leo Yoshimo were.

Like, I memorized the key. Photographer. Right. Nerdy I was. Yeah. So yeah, like, you know,

a lot of my most famous stuff has to do with like triumph and the Star Wars line is one of my happiest memories because I was like making fun of them, but I felt an affinity toward them at the same time. The nerds waiting online for Star Wars and triumphs. They were all like, they all took it so well. They were all just comedy fans. It was like,

yeah. Yeah, It was like when, it was like, have you guys, did you guys, I'm sure you spayed a sped. You both probably got to meet Don Rickles, right? Yeah. I did.

Yep. Did he insult you when he met you the first time? Do an impression of a gorilla is what he said to me. Oh, really? Yeah. You know, Smig's on, one time, Chris Farley took his mom to see him on one of the breaks on the weeks off. And he goes, and he goes, I go, what happened?

He goes, we sat right in the front row. And he goes, Rickles comes over to him in the middle and goes, what's your name, Tiny? And he goes, my name's Chris. And he goes, how much you weigh Chris? And he goes, about 260.

He goes, hmm, the left side of your ass maybe. And then he went to the next table. Yeah, and then he knew that it was Chris, right? I don't know. I don't know. It's just all funny. That's so funny. He's just like, I'm just going to treat him like anybody else.

Yeah, he just goes, there's a fat guy in the front serve. Maybe go for him. Yeah. He has a little bug in his ear when he got older. Fat guy three, three. Lady wearing a flower box hat. Take four steps to the right.

Closer. That's him. That's him. Get him. I took it as a badge of honor. I love being ripped by. Yeah. When I met him,

I was a producer at the Conan show, I think. Or no, I was doing triumph. I think. And I did it for Rickles, but I met him first. They introduced. me because they wanted to make it okay that you know make sure he would be cool with it and he sees me and he just says hello rabbi which i later heard was a move he had for a lot of semitic

this move like john stewart told me once that that was the first thing he said to john stewart when he i'm yeah he had his big a trick just to get safe offensive across the board thing to say yeah you know we've all got our standard zingers going full circle toward the end if you think triumph never said the buzz around flies around my ass before you're sad right there's only so many mathematical ways to get at that ass joke okay they can be flying around but regis told me once this was toward when when rickles was still on the road you know honest of god some nights you don't know if he's going to make it they give him two eyeballs he's rubbing his knees honest to god i don't know when they play the music it goes out and he kills him for an hour kid then he lies down on the couch

I like Honest to God. Honest to God. Who's better than Robert Smigel? Honest to God. This guy, he's everywhere. I mean, you know, it really is. He was really nice to me, too. I love you.

One time, this is insane. I had an idea for a sitcom, and it's one of the happiest half hours of my whole life. I got to sit in the hotel room and pitch Larry King and Regis Philbin, a sitcom where they played an old gay couple. And they took it dead serious like, this is a great idea. and they had already, like, consulted Rickles about it.

And Larry King's like, Rickles says we can do it, but we can't be too swish. Swish. And, you know, we would just talk about it. And Regis, the funniest was Regis. He was like, so Bob, again, I apologize for my inferior Regis, but it's like, so if we do this, you know, I know there's going to be a script, but not really, right? I mean, you know, we can get out there and Larry and I can just go off, right? just play off each other right well there's a story to the you know it's a sitcom it's got to have

yeah but bob i mean yeah bob learning lines and yeah i mean we have a natural thing bob rickles says we just have to look natural i'm like when did rickles become the oracle of sydc who run everything by rickles mr cpio sharky cpio sharky 1975 yeah if you have a copy that treatment can you send it to me and Dana. I don't think I ever bothered to write it. Somehow they said yes to just meeting with me for a half an hour. One other thing that Smigel has, it's one of the funniest titles is the autism benefit. The night of too many stars. It's the funniest title. Both of you have done. Of course. Thank you. Both of you have done it. You, you've done it a couple of times. Dana, you did the first one and it was one of the greatest bits that it's ever been on that.

We've done like seven of them. What was it? Well, Hal Wilner, rest his soul. Yes, music was an incredibly great guy who was the music supervisor or supervisor at Saturday Night Live and for 200 years. For 200 years. He missed the first 300 and he, um, he would help me book. He knew everybody in music. Yeah. And he would help me book the show. show with, you know, we had a Booker who would be paid and then Hal for free would get me, you know, he got me Elvis Costello once, he got me Sting. And this particular bit, he got me Lou Reed. And it was like a surprise appearance, the people in Roseland. You remember we did this in Roseland? And they're crazy. And Lou Reed comes out.

And it's like Jimmy Fallon saying, Lou Reed, he's going to have an all-star band. And then one by one, he introduces the all-star band. And it's all comedians. It's on the drums, Dana Carvey, on the guitar, Colin O'Brien. I think Sandler was there too? Jack Black, Adam Sandler, and Lou Reed played it perfectly, like, this is the All-Star band. And then they did this incredibly funny, somewhat disrespectful, but affectionate version of Walk on the Wild Side.

I love it. And it's on YouTube. And Sandler literally, like, is right in. his face going, Dhabi, Dhabi Dhabi, Dhabi Gapagababah, Jopajah,

I see me jappah, oh, Lou Reed got mad at me. It was very awkward. I still remember it. After the rehearsal, I didn't really have a monitor I could hear.

He's going to take a walk on the wild side. So he very seriously, as everyone scattered, just walked over to me and just was intense, Lou Reed, and goes, don't do that.

Don't do that. Don't do what? Whatever he thought I was doing the drums, I go, I'm a comedian and I can't air myself. Don't play like that, you know. He just got very serious. Maybe it was nerves.

But then we came out later, he was totally affable. He was probably just, that was the only thing he probably cared about was that it sounded good. Right. And I wanted to, I wanted to play well. I just that my monitor I couldn't. And you did, you did it. It sounds amazing. Oh, that's good.

I guess I got it on the air show. We just had a brief rehearsal. You absolutely. It was kind of fun. You know, Adam's an incredible. Adams, a great guitarist. and Conan's a good guitarist and Jack Blacks. I mean, these are like all the most musical.

They just happen to all be there. And that song is brilliant, but it is very, very austere and very simple, which is, you know, taking a walk on the way. You know, it's like. It was perfect. And everybody got a turn. You didn't because you were the drummer, but all these other guys did solos in their different ways.

Right. You know, I learned a few things from Smigel today. I learned that Franken and Davis hired him. Franken and Davis hired me. That is correct. His dad invented crest white strips? No, that's not true. Okay.

I invented, I heard that he did. Tooth bonding. He was the, he developed the whole tooth bonding technique. Right. And Lou Reed hates Stana Carvey. These are the only things I picked up. Lou Reed-A-Carvey.

Another one of my impressions has gone to the stars. I have insight onto, this involves you. Someone told me today. So Michael Gordon wants to go right for the, the Conan show. He talks to Bob Odenkirk and Bob Odenkirk

said wait, wait till we get Smigel as the head writer and then somehow you got, you became the head writer and then Oh,

you're talking about the original Conan show. I thought you meant Michael Gordon wants to write for the new Conan Oh, sorry. This is always back in time when they,

but he said Michael Gordon knew Bob Odenkirk? I think so or at least casually. Oh, hey. Oh, it's so funny. So good.

Oh, my God. That's so funny. Oh, my God. No, you're not doing that, are you? No. Was he mad about Chivinaos? Because there's a rumor down. He said I was really mad about it.

And I wasn't. Yeah, that was something down. He read online. He read online that you, it was the most ridiculous lie imaginable, that you, like, marched into lawns up. Yeah. It's just like you pounded up all people. You were like, you've been there for like four.

weeks. Yeah. I go, you know what, Marcy would have tackled me. You could have been there for five years. You never would have pounded on Lauren's door. Yeah, that was clearly made up. But there's a controversy around was that exploitive of Chris or not? People have their difference opinions when he did the Chip and Dale sketch with his shirt off. I thought that I thought the opposite, which was, I mean, I just have an inherent. I thought the people were not laughing at Chris. I didn't see it that way. I thought. Because there have been a million fat comedians who, you know, exploit their bodies in some way or another, playoff being heavy. But the thing that I saw that night was an audience fall in love with Chris. Yeah. Because he was so committed and he was such a good dancer. Yeah, he's a great. And he wasn't. He acted like he wasn't remotely ashamed of his body, you know, whether that's, you know, obviously not necessarily the truth.

but that's what he projected. And to me, it was like, if anything, they didn't use the word empowering back then, but to me, that's how it felt to me, like, you know, the way somebody like Bridget Everett, where the person is,

you know, completely unselfconscious about their body, at least it played that way to me. But, you know, I would say this. I would say if you saw that in Chris, if you felt that that was happening to Chris, then maybe you should have talked to Chris about it

and made sure it was cool with Chris instead of just saying tut-tut. I didn't know a thing. I just saw a young cast member. Yeah, I barely knew him. I did not. Look, there's different levels. This was young Chris.

I saw a guy very athletic. I think anyone next to Patrick Swayze would look kind of chubby. And so Chris was moving really like a chubby guy, not like a next level. He was not even that big back then. No, and I saw a guy killing with physical comedy. But if he was sad about it inside, I was clueless to it. I was clueless too if he was.

But I mean, when I saw him at Second City that summer, he was another person I had the privilege of seeing audition back then. And he, what struck me about him at Second City was how graceful he was. Like he was the opposite of how he falls down. Who gained some weight? He was an athlete. Yeah. Yeah.

And he was incredibly graceful, and that's what separated him besides, you know, his incredible characterizations. Like, but, you know, so to me, that's, the sketch was, the only thing it was exploiting was his incredible was what made him special. I would go by David's point. Only because David was probably the closest to Chris. I don't remember any problems. I don't think David was.

closest back then, though. Maybe not back then, but after they did their movies and stuff. Well, right up there, right? That's different. By then Chris started to get like, like, you know, in the motivational speaker sketch, I remember adding, I had one contribution to that sketch because Bob was no longer there, oddly enough. Yeah.

Bob wrote the entire sketch and Spade, you know this. I added just that little part at the end where he's like, Matt's going to shade you. You're here, Matt's here. You're, you know, that thing. Yeah. He knocks over the coffee. Yeah, that's great. And he knocks over the coffee table.

Yeah. And that was like, I just felt it needed like a physical topper at the end. Yeah, a good out. So we put it in and it worked. And then I feel, though, that it did lead to like the slippery slope of Farley knocking things. Oh, he's going through walls to the ceiling. Yeah. It started, it started something that I did not intend to happen.

Yeah. Well, they're kind of waiting for it after that. Every sketch, they're like, what's he going to hit? What's he going to fall through? Well, certainly with the Matt Foley ones, yeah, but it started happening in other sketches, too. He just walks in and falls in. Fatty falls down.

That's all you got, Farles. I would call it. Then we started getting cynical about it. Like, Chris, you know, we would just come up with different means for the falls. That Nancy Kerrigan sketch, he was a great ice skater, too. Oh, that's true. There you go. Yeah, he could ice skate as well.

Yeah. So that canceled out Shippendale. So we're evening. I just, you know, when people say. it's just very glib to like, you know, that sketch set him off. That's just so, I just find that irresponsible to. Well, I never heard him complain about it in the years to come. So I think he was just like, if you're a young cast member and that,

and you get a sketch that's a 10 out of 10 and he took it and it blew him up, I don't think he ever looked back and said, but I felt like. No. So many other things got. Did he ever take his shirt off again on the show? I mean, he fell around and stuff and walked through walls, but I don't remember him. I'm not sure he did. It didn't become a thing.

Let's get Chris's shirt off. So that's good, too. I mean, there was a lot of restraint until like the later, I think it wasn't until it was like third or fourth year. It was like people were running out of what to do with them. And it became like a shorthand kind of cheap move to have Farley break something, you know. But he was like, oh, my God, Spade, do you remember? his acting in that Tom Schiller. Oh, the coffee one?

Yeah, just the way his face changes when he, when he hears that they've switched Folgers. That's a great idea. How many takes does he get to trash the whole set? I know. That was all Tom Schiller. The Schiller vision of the Folgers commercial was a real hit. That is kind of at a gem that not everyone saw.

I put it in the best of because of that. Yeah, a great one. So that people would see it because it was one of his greatest acting jobs ever. Yeah, they could look it up. All right. Let's wrap. Anything else for this guy, Dana? Let's see.

It's for this guy. Your Social Security number just for, this is just housekeeping. It's a social security number. Stay on and do the paperwork. We're going to jump off. No, that's it. You did. We covered literally everything you've ever done.

Well, we did a lot of SNL, but all. Obviously, Robert and I did the Dana Carvey show. Oh, my God. Ambiguously gay duo. That is so funny that we didn't talk about the Dana Carvey show. It's all right. It's a really, we're Saturday Live focus, but that was. You'll do a whole podcast about that somebody.

Right. We have a Hotel Transylvania podcast after this if you want to stay on. That's what I'm waiting for. You want to stay on. You were Zohan. Just a Hotel Transylvania 2 podcast. He did the clutch cargo characters on Conan, which I loved. Oh, the Arnold, yeah.

Just the lips and the arms. Talk about exaggeration. Oh, my God, we didn't talk about the Hans and Franz movie. That would have been. Hans and Franz. This is the part of the show where we just talk about how much better the show could have been. Well, we'll be. A Hans and Franz movie.

Oh. We have to have you back. We saw, I wrote all your stuff out today. And I knew there was no way this was going to fit into an hour. And so. I know. It's okay. More than anything, I wish I'd talked about that.

Which one? The Hans and Franz movie. Because Because it's so funny and crazy. It's a hysterical movie. Dana has talked about it on here because it was the whole way it got put together and then it didn't work out, but there was so many. Hans and Franz, the girly men dilemma.

But it was not homophobic. It was just girly men are not, are just men without big muscles like them. Do you remember the part? Okay, well, this is going to, we can't. I was going to talk. about the Siskel and Ebert part was one of my favorite yeah that was a whole story you have 12 seconds go Hans and Franz were doing their movie and they're running around somewhere and they go into a room and Siskel and Ebert are watching the movie I mean they're not they're just doing the movie they're in the

movie they're doing a cross-country trip to Los Angeles because they want to be in the movies and be with Arnold yeah and then they're riding a bicycle across country and then at one point they happen upon a big a big uh... and they just walk in and Siskel and Ebert, the most famous critics at the time, Dean Siskel and Roger Ebert are sitting in the theater and it's just like, how's the movie? It's pretty good so far. They're watching the movie. Lots of action and collapse.

They're in this dark room watching the exact movie that's taking place. So on the screen is them, us talking to them? Yeah, it's you talking to them. they're like in their movie seats and then on the screen as us talking to them watching the movie right but it's like like four seconds behind four seconds fine got it yeah that kind of yeah and then eventually they get kidnapped because they're girly men right like you go to check in on them later and they're gone because the the evil villain has kidnapped he's like remember sunny bono disappears and right uh i can't remember who famous girly man of the day. The bad guy had a big button that said hurt the weather

and then we cut to Stallone look out his window go and the weather seems hurt somehow, you know. Yeah, it was, uh, it was going to be Dolf Lundgren. And he had like this kind of like final solution villain kind of thing where I am going to eliminate all the girly man. And so the And then he turned to the camera and say, and I'm going to hurt the environment. And the button that said hurt the environment. That's right. Because we were obsessed.

I desperately wanted to do like Mike Myers was my hero later because he with Dr. Evil created a character that remember all these 80s comedies, the villain. You always had to like take it seriously for like. Right. Rather than a funny. You know, whether it was Max Foncito or. in strange brewer, like,

there, you always had to have these obligatory villains. And so we were trying to make fun of that and have the villain be as funny as the can. And then Mike ended up doing everything. Good for Mike. Good for Mike. All right.

I go my show. This has been Robert Smigel. What I would say, he's the greatest sketchwriter of his generation. he's in the discussion. I put him at the top, but everyone can have their opinion. Jack Candy was the guy that I...

Different lane, though. I put him in a different lane, but yeah. It's a different lane, but here's what I'll say about Jack. That was why all the writers, I would say if you pulled at least the writers at that era, they would have gone with Jack. And it's because someone like me wrote a lot of,

I'm very proud of a lot of things I wrote, but I feel like, you know, there are ideas that only I could have thought of, but there are other ones that I think other people could have. And where Jack, like nobody else could have thought of almost any of the sketches, Jack Handy. Yeah. That's just something. Any read through, you'd be like, oh, my God, this is Jack Handy within three lines.

You're like, everyone looks around. Yeah, exactly. He's over there smiling. And also, like people act like he was just the act seven guy, like the five to 11. Tudses was huge. Tudses was the biggest character on the show for a couple years. Yeah, yeah. Like literally the biggest character on.

on the show was a cat puppy. Yeah. Tunes, look out. And we know that's frozen caveman lawyer. Yeah. Would always,

they would get no laughs practically, but everybody from Lauren on down was in awe of that brilliant sketch. And so it was always, it always made the show. It was never at the end of the show

because we were all collectively just so proud to put it on. Your Honor, I am a simple, unfrozen caveman. or something. I don't know. I was just a perfect use of Thor.

Yeah. He did that perfect smarty. I don't know what's going on. Yeah. It's almost like I'm a cave. Simple cave, man. I'm just a simple cave. I think 60 million impunitive damages feels about right.

So we all love Jack. Yes. Okay. Thanks, Robert. Thanks, Robert. Thanks, guys. Loved it. Hey, guys.

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