Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade - SUPERFLY #19 - Cults, drugs, and p$rn

Episode Date: June 7, 2024

The guys open with tales from the road, bits, and the important headlines before being joined by Sarah Edmonson, who was a former member of NXIVM and helped expose the group as a cult. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. But you know, look at how fast we're almost halfway through the year. Crazy. Yeah. Are you proud of what you've done in 2020 so far? I mean, you always want to do more, right? When life goes so fast, David, it's important to take a moment to celebrate your wins, make adjustments for the rest of the year.

Therapy can help you take stock of your progress and set achievable goals for the next six months. Yeah. David, listen, therapy is a way to go. I did it for a while. And I think the thing that slowed me down was what they is driving to Santa Monica in traffic once or twice a week. Yes. This is online.

No, it's so it's a great idea. Very convenient. It helps you. Um, you've got coping skills, it's so convenient. It's a great idea. Very convenient. It helps you. You've got coping skills, how to set boundaries. I mean, there's so many things you can do here to be a better version of yourself. You can probably always sharpen it.

Yeah, I mean, I had a therapist in Portland and I would commute and that was a pain. I've had therapy. From here, that's a long drive. I know, it was 1300 miles one way, but you know, it's good therapist, but yeah, this one you can mix and match and your thoughts kind of control you

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You're jumping into your ass licked park and they don't know what's going on. They're like, are there real dinosaurs out there? Are they licking each other's asses? I mean, I mean, really, instead of Bugs Bunny and why Disneyland? You got shaving Ryan's privates. It's a war movie, but it's a little different. And don't even get me on Schindler's Fist. Welcome to Superfly. This is David Spade and we got Dana Carvey.

To all of our fans around the world. Thank you. To people that look the same, but we really don't. But you put in the comments every day. Okay. I literally put my head in a blender. Oh yeah. Your hair. I kind of like it like that. Well, you know, I tried to do the day after hair, so I watched it last night and then,

and then it didn't take, it didn't take, it didn't take, it just went weird. I don't know. Anyway, whatever. Uh, we'll do a whole episode on hair at some point. We might, we're trying to get a Pert Plus collab sponsor. Okay. So here's what happened when I was on the road. I'm going back on my southern tour, Dana, by the way, which is... So we were both on the road. Yeah. So you went down to North Carolina.

No, that's my next leg. But this leg was Atlanta. Water went out. They had a state of emergency. Yeah, no water. No thanks. But this leg was Atlanta, water went out. They had a state of emergency. Yeah, no water, no thing. In the city of Atlanta, no water? Yeah, half the city. And then I thought it was just our hotel, but then they go, you want a bottle of water?

And I go, I'll take two, one for the shower, one for the bath. And it's tough, I mean, this sounds gross. It's not. But when you go number two, the front desk said, could you beach it, you know, on the edges and then we'll fix it later. I said, I'm glad you said number two beach it. If you wouldn't mind all the guests, if you could beat your turds. You have a lot of gastrointestinal issues on the road. There's a lot of gastrointestinal issues on the road. There's a lot of- Gastrointestinal. Testicle.

Okay. Well, my microphone wants to rise up like a Kresgen trick. All right, here we go. I'm wearing black, so we are fucking exactly the same. All right, so I go to the mall, which is all you do on the road, and you usually buy nothing. You just wander. It's just to get steps. And then I go into Macy's, and this old guy guy's there and I'm looking for, I hate to be embarrassed

even though I talk about beaching, undergarments. Okay. You know? You were looking for underwear? Yeah. So I say to the guy, hey, he can't really hear. I go, hey, where are the men's, you know, undergarments? He goes underpants. And I go, Nope.

And I see people, couple of people, why is that a whisper meerkats? Cause I don't want to know. And then there's the underwear. Yeah. Because then he goes, where is the underpants? Now he doesn't know. And now he's, I'm like, I can say that. I can yell it to the store. But he's like looking around and I go, you work here? I thought you might know something. He goes, I think underpants would be this way. So he's, I'm following him.

Everyone's like, that guy from grownups needs underpants, it's horrifying. So I'm like, hey everybody. And then he gets in and he goes, there you go. And then there's like a wall, Calvin Klein, 80 feet high. So, you know, I almost need the ladder, you know, like at the library. So I go in there and I'm like,

and I pick one up and he goes, are those the underpants you like? I go, are you still here? I'm here, I got it. I got it from here. And then he's just still, and then he takes a few steps back, and then I pick up some of those boxer kinds, and he goes, Oh, you like the tight ones, hug your leg.

It'll show off. Okay. That's enough. And then anyway, I got some underpants and left. That's all. I went, I went shopping for once in the South and the guy, I was similar to that guy, but whether he'd say, Oh, you want, you want some under panties? I go, no, underpants. He goes, you, I think you need some under panties. Let's go over here and find you some under panties. Oh, humiliating.

I know. It was so feminine. I don't know where underpants. What about drawers? Well, you need some drawers, you need some boxes, you need some underpants, but you can all go free zone like I do. Look, look free ball. Feel my balls.

They're like clackers in there. I don't like the free balls. It was pouring in Houston, so I was just in a room for 36 hours. I mean, it was torrential lightning storms. So I went a little crazy. So I was just in my under panties bouncing up top of the bed and I was crying myself to sleep. I was this far to the TV. I was hoarding rooms. I mean, 36 hours in a regular room. Cause I don't like sweets. I mean, people are very generous in these gigs, but I don't want to get up in the middle of the night, walk a half mile or bump into a table.

So I just get a little room. Yeah. I don't want a resort place where they go, Oh, we'll get on a cart. We'll take you to eat. We got on a cart. We'll go to the pool. I go, I just want to be near things. I don't want to go out in that tundra, especially when it's pouring pissing rain.

So I had two flights on the way out. My seatmate was a sweet old woman with two masks on that kept herself never left her seat in red. That was great. The way back, everything's kind of mellow, people loading in guy jumps in next to me. I want to say six, eight, 300 pounds. I mean, literally just a giant person. He's got a carry on suitcase and the handle won't go down. So he's trying to get it down. He's got these giant fists and he's hamming. I can't get it down. I don't know where he was from. I can't get it down. He starts pounding it really hard again, again, again. It's like he's not pushing the little button. He's just trying to ram it in. No, he's trying that. It's literally broken. Finally,

I found a guy and he came over. Oh, just put it back there. Eight rows back. Don't worry about it. But that was just the beginning. I'm trying to relax. I've got a core's light. I don't like to fly. Again, again. Stress, stress, sweating. Not good. Then he tries to jam it in. It doesn't fit. Fuck this. It's a lot of tension. Yeah. They're like, sir, you have to check it. No one wants to check it. That's someone wants to watch you with your giant meaty fist pounding on some Samsonite loose luggage thing. Get a better one. I go, how old is that?

He goes, it's 10 years old. You know, come on guy. Yeah, it's time. You're in first class. Get a suitcase. I heard Jimmy Fallon did a funny, I think you got some Biden stuff, but he did a funny joke about Biden, which isn't always the case on these talk shows.

It's kind of funny that they go both ways. Oh, okay. He said Biden was over in France and talking about the Olympics, and he suggested some new events like the 100-yard wander and synchronized squinting. That's pretty funny. Yeah, those are good jokes. It's got a cue in it. It's funny. Yeah, that's a funny joke.

I just figure in the first debate at some point with Trump, he'll be looking at him and go, what are you some kind of monster? Come on, man. You're like the creature from the Black Lagoon. Came out of the lagoon and scared all the teenagers. I play the creature from the Black Lagoon. I got out of the Navy. They said you want to put the suit on. It was a rubber suit. So I play the creature from the Black Lagoon. Came out and scared all the teenagers. You played him?

I played him. I played him in 1960. 40, 45, 55, 50, what else, sold. 45, 47, 48, 50, 50, sold. Sold. Yeah. Yeah.

I have a Trump thing. These are just quick hits. Quickies. These are called quick hits. Trump, the only way to get out of the convicted felling thing, I'm announcing right now, it just happened in the last six hours. I divorced Melania. I went to the courthouse and now I'm completely legally married to Ms. Stormy Daniels.

Stormy Trump, Mrs. Stormy Trump is my wife and she can't testify against her husband so the whole case is thrown out because of Mrs. Stormy Trump. I did it again. That's his only way out is to marry her, her testimony be thrown out and he's free as a bird. Why is he thinking about that? That's really smart. It was a quick hit comedy bit.

No, I'm saying he should think that because that's pretty good. It's funny and it gets things done. I'm going to go out on a limb and just say these are wild times and very divisive times. That's all. All right. Well, let's get to some headlines and we will. Let's headline it up. Yeah. What do we got?

Anything? I will read this and I'll add my own thing. Giant venomous flying spiders may invade New York this year. Get fucked. By the way, Dana, I don't like walking spiders. I don't like spiders just that can travel on the ground and on the walls. I definitely don't need them dive bombing me.

Land, sting, fly away. And they don't need to be giant. I don't like that word. Giant venomous flying spiders. Look, they have a flag behind it. And they have an American flag behind it. Maybe it's a military weapon or something. Oh God, that's a good idea. What would you, okay, would you rather have a snake in your bed as you get in or a giant

venomous flying spider? Now listen, this is an easy no-brainer for me because- Okay. Snake. Spider. Okay, snake, spider. I am okay with snakes. My brother had five snakes, actually rattlesnakes, in a cage in his room in the house when we were like 10 and 12.

And he also had a boa that got loose in the house. And he had a python that got loose in the house. So we went to bed for three weeks not knowing where the python was, where the boa was, and my mom was like, oh, and then we went to sell the house. I was in the living room and they were showing the house and I look up and I see it in the books and I'm like, this might be the worst time to mention this to the new buyer, but we found one of the snakes and that's not a great sales. Did you close escrow? Did you sell it? Yeah we got our 14 grand or whatever a house cost then but I think what if Bill Gates is involved

because didn't he make mosquitoes? I don't want those either. I don't think anyone that does this job should go into making mosquitoes. Just, it just feels like two different businesses. So he's making, Bill Gates may, to help Africa with malaria or something? I think, but there, I, and this needs to be in the comments. Someone tell me because I've got my head on my ass. But he either made them, obviously in a positive way. Genetically engineered them, right? To like,

thing another mosquito and knock or not pass malaria, make them something impotent in that sterilize them dry. Have you ever had a snake or a bone constrictor around your neck? Yes. Okay. You tell me your story. I'll tell you mine. Okay. I'm, oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were just, oh, you have one. I was just saying, it's not the place you want to be. It wasn't big enough, but go ahead with yours. Well, we'd have these giant kid birthday parties and the whole school

can be like 25 people. And there was a local guy named Desert, Desert Dave and Desert Dave would come in and you have cages and you have cages with all these muskrats and snakes. That's my new Happy Madison movie, by the way. Desert Dave. You should believe him. Yeah. Desert Dave.

Super nice guy. Had the hat, had the pattern. All the kids are happy. So there's like a bow instructor who brings it out. Big fucking gnarly. He's like, what dad wants to put this around? Come on. His name is Billy.

He'll be fine. So I'm like, okay. So he starts wrapping around my neck and all the kids are chanting, do it, do it. And then it starts to tighten just for a second. And you realize that moment. Yeah. It could take you out. It's curtains. So I had it around my neck. And then they have to undo it, which takes a second. Okay. two spiders, two snakes, or three rats. Which one do you put your covers up? Get in bed with three rats,

two snakes, or two spiders. I'm so scared of spiders. I just think they win this any contest. Spider Mishu, I grew up with Black Widows, Brown Ray Clues. They're just so terrifying and they really fuck you up. Like a Brown Ray Clues will bite your arm and it just looks like a little dot and you're like, I'm fine and then your arm caves in right there. And everyone goes, what the fuck? Yeah.

We got a lot of tarantulas on this place. They scare me too. Why? Cause they are fucking terrifying, but I have let them walk on me against my better judge. Yeah. I don't like this. I don't like they have two feelers. Yeah. This kind of like this motion, but they move kind of slow. You know, they sniff with their fingers or rats are like that. You know, they got two things here. They go, they don't bite. I go, they might as well because they can jump six feet too.

Oh, let me give you a morality test. Okay. You find a pincher bug in your room at night. Do you, do you squash it or do you get a little tissue paper, grab it and release it outside? Yeah. Five seconds. The answer is I let it go.

The real answer is you kill it. Real answer is I kill it in front of his friends and then I burn it and then I go, this is what happens when you enter this room. So just get the word out. There's a lot of pincher bugs out there. Pincher bug is the funniest word I haven't heard. You haven't heard toot sweet in a while. I haven't heard pincher bug.

Well when I was doing the Mulligan cartoon, which is on Netflix right now, my Southern character, we're going to take care of the America toot suite. That's why it made me laugh because that was one of the phrases my character meaning let's get to it. All right, next story. Oh, listen, this is a big one for me because a remote Amazon tribe gets Starlink internet and they're hooked on porn immediately. Immediately, if not sooner Dana. Of course. They're like, give it an hour. The guy goes, you're supposed to be cooking fish and hunting and you're whacking at the shitty, shitty gangbang. They're just getting introduced to first. That's hysterical. It's essentially they don't have visual images. They don't have television.

It's like instead of watching Father's Notes best, Deep Throat is the first thing you see. Instead of being introduced to like I Love Lucy and building your way to just understanding TV, you're jumping into your ass licked park. And they don't know what's going on. They're like, are there real dinosaurs out there? Are they licking each other's asses?

I mean, I mean, really, instead of Bugs Bunny and why Disneyland, you got- Shaving Ryan's privates. There's a war movie, but it's a little different and don't even get me on Schindler's Fist because I know you know these and they're real. Instead of Sesame Street, you get Schindler's Fist. Which in this climate right now, that's not the one to watch.

But I will say these guys and the dads are so sad. I read this article. The dads are like, oh, this kid's, you know, he's jerking his gherkin. He should be like hunting, fishing, doing all the things that they're supposed to do, making pottery. He's rubbing his wiener against a coconut tree. Yeah, they're just completely, they're not only fascinated, they're completely over-sexed in a neurotic way. They're humping animals and trees and bushes.

They're just, porn really works, you know. By the way, porn drives everything. Like when VHS cassettes came in, not doing too well. Got a porn movie on them. Here we go. Boom! Dad buys a VHS. All technology is invented

and then some usually dude finds out to make it sexual. Like this was documented the first telegraph message did it did it did it go ahead send soldiers we're Dodge City did it did it do the second one was did it did it what are you wearing third one was yo yo you up that's right oh some rapper sent me this that's why Clinton didn't get into trouble because he didn't have cell phones. The reason Anthony Weiner got caught with his wiener because he had an iPhone and he thought, well, I could take pictures of nature and take pictures of that.

Oh, I know. Bloop. Take a picture of my wiener. Those tribe kids are learning about masturbation too. I hate to say they come hand in hand, but he's got that with aloe vera juice. It's probably a little different, but they really are going to try to get it because you know, too much porn leads to that. I mean, a show of hands. Who's been there. Yeah, I gave up porn for a while. It's actually been almost what time is it?

It's been almost an hour. Porn. No, I can't. Not your thing. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, They're up there and they're in their G string dancing and men are ogling and giving them dollar bills. But every single one, if you had a bullhorn, go, attention strippers, you can leave now with no problem, you can go home and we'll give you the exact same amount of money you would get if you were stripping.

All those in favor of leaving now, leave. Ghost town. They would leave? I think so, they don't wanna do it. They're not doing it for the love of the game. Okay, next one. Warmer sunnier days are a-calling. Fuel up for them with factors. No prep, David.

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This reminded me of a story Dana. I did Home Alone's Daniel Stern for the ones listening, almost killed snorting cocaine in a movie. So he did a movie and I guess he said they gave him B12, which is what you get, which wakes you up anyway because it looks like cocaine. And then they go, on the later takes, the director said, I'll give you my personal stash of actual coke. So he went fucking bazooties. He went, he stayed up for two days. Now in a related story,

I did a movie called Light Sleeper. I only had one scene and in a side story, I think you turned it down and that's how I got it. It was with Paul Schrader who wrote Taxi Driver and Ragin' Bull. It was great. And he wrote it and directed it early in SNL and they said audition for it. And I did. And he said, that was pretty good. He said, I say what, I'm going to try to get Dana Carvey to do it. And if he doesn't, I'll give it to you. And I said, fine.

And I think I had heard you didn't do it because you had to pay for yourself to fly back to New York to do it. Whoever did it. What year was this? You were probably worried. It was only a one day part to play a coke. Oh, one day part. I got it.

Yeah. Yeah. And also pay, you would have lost money. And I said, oh, well, and they go, Dana is too busy. And I said, oh, I'll do it. So I did it. And then the scary part was it's with Willem Dafoe. It's me and him. And I'm, I'm selling him Coke and I start trying to do, I said,

how do I fake like, do I go out of camera and do it? And he goes, no, we'll just give you this. And they put a line of Coke talk about culty. I was like, and I snort that into my brains, whatever it is. And they're like, yeah, okay, rolling. And I'm like, and I snort that into my brains, whatever it is. They're like, yeah, okay, rolling. And I'm like, what is it again? Like I'm snorting because I had done coke, but I was like, I don't want to snort something that's not coke. That was scarier to me. All right. So it was B12 snort it.

B12. B12. In powder form. Yeah. And then I do about 10 takes to rap. You wrap, you're the best, blah, blah, blah. You're unbelievable, blah, blah. You're new, fine, star of the future, whatever. And then I will in the photo, take care. Should I get your number? No, okay, fine, that's okay. And then I leave and they have a car out there

and I'm already like this, like a teapot. Freaking out and I go, I think I'm just going to walk. And the driver's like, okay pal. And then I walk and then I keep walking. And I'm so gacked out on B12 because I forgot it, it's supposed to up you. You know, I was like half hour later, I'm like clang, clang, clang goes the trolley. I couldn't shut up. I couldn't stop talking. I couldn't go to sleep. I stayed up easily the whole night to the next night. You sure didn't have some vitamin coke in there? I don't know. Honestly, I don't know. A B12. I mean, I had similar things like when I was, I was doing this scene, I don't know if it made the movie, um, as Garth and I had chocolate milk

and, um, and I took a sip of it and I go, Hey, this is Nestle's quick, man. I asked for regular chocolate milk and I threw a fit. I go, this is Nestle's quick. And I asked for regular chocolate milk. No, I made that up. I was trying to find a way to, Oh, I think they made me better if they put cocaine in it. Well, I was trying to make mine so innocent compared to like Coke, Daniels, and I'm just like, no, this is Nestle's quick. I want, I want Ovaltine.

I didn't even complain. I was like, whatever I'm told. I like some Ovaltine. That'd be good. God, anytime to get in Garth, I like it. Garth I heard was an asshole and says, that's true. You were nice, but Garth. I got TMJ by doing golf, golf Garth that even that hurt.

Cause I do, I do it on SNL just be for five minutes, but like 10 hours a day do this. Right. Yeah. I've done this for 11 hours. I can't feel my lower jaw. Then I went to the dentist. I go, my jaw hurts.

What'd he been doing? I said, I've been making this face 10 hours a day. He goes, stop doing that. Well, don't do that. Not for what they're paying me, bitch. Yeah, I'll be, Kel's still doing it. Okay, one more. What's next? Then we got a couple more.

Then we have a guest. Oh, you know, I just think that the models with the arm hair, it's been around forever. Lovely, lovely girl, talented, but when they make such a point, like this, it's hurting her shoulder to show I wouldn't look at my arm here. Like this is my accidental pose. Okay, you have arm here and everyone's supposed to go. Is that cool? Is it? I'm not grossed out. I don't care. Um, it kind of, you know, just, just psychologically from where I'm from, it denotes masculinity.

You know? So I guess, is it sexy to you or neutral? Well, it's saying I'm ambiguously, what doesn't matter. What, don't worry about what I am and also check this shit out. Yeah, obviously I don't care if anyone wants to do anything. They want their body. I just think that we human beings evolve to like, I know a hipp check this shit out. Yeah, obviously I don't care if anyone wants to do anything. They want their body. I just think that we human beings evolve to like, I know a hippie to be guy.

It's like, if you have a nostril hair, this like the co-star coming down here, he goes, Oh, you shouldn't clip that. It's just natural. Nose hair is just natural. Um, he didn't think you should whiten your teeth. I said, would you rather kiss someone with bright yellow, brown teeth or white teeth? That stumped him for a bit. Yeah, I don't need tope teeth. But the idea of what is natural, you know, we're going to leave the planet at some point. Yeah, where's the bush pan down? I mean, come on, what are we just stopping at the armpits? Come on.

Yeah. Are you going to shave, pluck, manipulate your exterior? Yeah. Where your eyebrows go? Yeah. Those porn guys in Africa, they're the ones. Come on. Yeah, are you gonna shave, pluck, manipulate your exterior? Or just go natural? Yeah, wear your eyebrows. Get like your eyebrows go. Yeah, those porn guys in Africa, they're the ones. It goes back to them. Those guys should. They were whacking off to that cover for a while.

Okay. And shaving. We'll go to the next one. What is this? Oh, this is some guy doing celebrity laughs. I thought you might like this because it's celebrity impressions. Yeah.

Let's see what. Yeah, let's see That's hilarious, oh! Ray, I'm on him. Oh, that's pretty good. Ah-ha! Ah-ha! Ah-ha! He-he-he-he-hell yeah! Ah-ha! Ah-ha-ha-ha! Alright, okay.

Denzel. Ah-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he- Very funny very good Hilarious haha Damn he's cramming a man. Jesus fucking shit. Lord have mercy. Wait, something's wrong. Stop this. Oh yeah. Comedy. Okay.

This could have been five TikToks. I'm gonna jump out. He had some good ones. Yeah, there's some good ones in there. Yeah, definitely. It good ones in there. Yeah, yeah, definitely. Celebrities laughing, which is a kind of a new way to do impressions, right? Yeah, it's what I call micro impressions, just like a push of a.

It gets a quick hook in on them. Yeah, a quick hook, you know. They were pretty good. I mean, I haven't heard impressions of like the rock. There's some new ones, right? Yeah, I mean, just haven't heard impressions of like the rock. There's some new ones, right? Yeah, I mean, just singular sounds are good. I do this in my act, Christopher Walken, sorry, old one, does season amazing magic trick.

Wow! So just nice, nice and- That sounds exactly like him, by the way. Christopher Walken can't open a jar of peanut butter. Wow! It's all the same sound. That sounds exactly like him, by the way. Christopher Walken can't open a jar of peanut butter. Ow! It's all the same sound. Can't open a jar of white. Doing a weird thing.

Yeah. That's funny. Weird, strange things. I have Owen Wilson tells a toddler they can't have a snack. Sorry, buddy, you can't have any more candy. Oh, I do a lot of them. They're called micro impressions. I like it. Okay, what's any, we got another one. Oh, I just thought this is interesting. Look at this plastic surgery. That's what we're showing folks. It's a guy who looks pretty old. Looks like he runs a comedy club. And then-

He looks beat up. Yeah, he looks like they got the shit kicked on him. He kinda looks like Borat's friend in that movie. And then that's him, Dana, after he got a few things. Show the next picture. Is that real? Can they prove that? I mean, he did a good job.

Okay, hair, new hair is a huge improvement, but the guy could have grown his out. Okay, new hair, grew his beard. It's the eyes are so different. Eyes are different, yeah. It looks like his son. Yeah. Is it nose smaller, jaw and neck fixed so it looks tighter. He honestly looks 30 years younger. Yeah, it's hard that

guy with the neck on the lower left, it's hard to shrink. You take the fat out, but to get it that tight, well, it's a massive surgery. It feels like someone was choking him, yeah. Because from his Adam's apple to the back of his head is like a foot. Now it's like six, seven inches. I mean, I need proof on this one. He brought in a picture of Robert Smigel and said, turn me into this. Well, no, actually they reversed it because that's a young guy who wanted to look older. He had plastic surgery to look older. Well that's, it worked perfectly. Anyway, in a related story, I'm flying to Turkey next

week. Okay, what's the next one? I want to get all that done. You don't need any work, you're too young. What's next? Oh, this is a Kinesin bit. I just want to show the audience an old Kinesin bit. I think it's funny, it's not too long. This guy, he calls some of the audience. Kate there?

Kate? Yeah. Live. Yeah, hang on uh... Kate there? Kate? Yeah. Uh, yeah, hang on a second. Kate? It gets loud, of course. It's Kinnison. Watch me work, Kevin. Watch me work.

Hello? Hi, Kate? Yeah? Kate! It's so good to talk to you. Who is it? This is Sam Kinnison. I'm down at the Wildren Theater.

Who? Yes! You are the winner of a very special prize. This is Sam Kinnison, I'm down at the Wildren Theater. Who? Yes! Who? You are the winner of a very special prize. And what's that? Well, you remember Kevin? Uh, yeah. Do you remember Kevin?

Yeah. Did you used to go out with him? A long time ago. Well that's what he was telling us. And we were looking for a girl who was a fucking god that fucked her boyfriend's brother! Fucking fucking bitch! Long time ago. Well that's what he was telling us. And we were looking for a girl who was a fucking con that fucked her boyfriend's brother! Fucking fucking bitch! I don't give a fuck about yourself!

I don't give a shit about your fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking fucking I hope you're running hell! I hope you're running fucking hell! He's doing Kinnison now. Dude, tell him I'm getting the crowd going. I can't even process that. First of all, how scary. So the idea was she had an affair with the guy's brother. Right, so he calls her from stage, which is always risky. Will they answer?

Do they want to be on the line? And then, I'm like, you won! Is that too rough? It was just Kennison. I mean, if you know him, he did stuff like that constantly. He had a real part of his act was being brokenhearted and feeling just put upon and burned and dumped by women. He had a real chip on his shoulder and he made it Hysterically funny with that rhythm that takes a lot of strength to scream that loud. Oh my god He'd say like this. He'd have the microphone and he goes, ah

You tell your girlfriend I'm going to Vegas. Yeah, that's fine. Oh, really? That's okay. Yeah, just the boys. Yeah, that's fine Let me tell you something. Let me just take your dick. You're not gonna need it. He takes the mic off Holds it he goes you won't need this. That's his thing is he'll talk really casual like that one about Africa. So these people are out and starving in Africa. And I just think they, they, in the desert, they might want to think that they should go to where the food is. Yeah. Yeah. You know what this is on the bottom?

You know what you're standing on? It's sand. It's sand. It's gonna be sand. It's a little Wicked Witch of the West, I thought it was. Ha ha ha. All right, let's do another one. We're doing pretty good, right?

Oh, we're having a good time. We're having a good time. No, I only had this question for you, Dana. When it says Ben Affleck's teen debuts red hair, we're not making fun of that. We're saying, Jennifer Lopez, child Emmy seems to have removed their flesh tunnels.

I'm sorry, what is that? What does that mean? Is that because they used to say Playboy was nudity, but Hustler had tunnel shots. It's kind of a rough term, but I don't like the term flesh tunnels. I don't know what it means. Remove their flesh tunnels.

What do you think? Oh, I got an idea. Ear lobes? Oh, that's probably true. Can you see it though? When you have like a nickel size hole in your ear? Is that one have one? Yeah, I guess maybe maybe in the lower right.

Is there a tell us on YouTube? Because is that a hole there? Yeah, I don't know. I, you know, again, I always root for kids who were, didn't ask to be put in this bubble of madness. So to me, and without knowing anything, I just say, it's kind of hip to own it. Like if we're going to be out here and have all this power, Otzi and freaks, I'm going to wear like this bright red Bozo the clown wig.

It sort of feels like a sort of F you to the press. No, it's just I it's not a wig. I don't know. I think I think it's a slip on wig. I'm sorry. No, look at the kid looks like Timothy Shum, Shum, Lamma Ding Dong. I don't know. I can't. We're not piling on JLo and Ben.

They're going through it right now. They might be fine. Who the fuck knows? Anybody who gets in that machine for whatever reason, it's, it's not fun. You're followed by freaks and Ben over here, over here, over here. I like when they go, they look grumpy today. I'm like, well, they're being followed by a caravan of cars that are cutting off traffic to take photos. They're not smiling every second because they're actually terrified that you're going to crash into them or kill them. Who's the biggest star who moved the far furthest away?

Like where, where can you live? There's no paparazzi because the paparazzi are going to be in LA because there's good fish in there. They're going to be maybe near Montecito, you know, are they going to be, they will fly for a picture. Like if you, if you're a big star and you go to the Maldives, they will fly there. The hotel will leak it. They'll come out. Make sure with lenses that can take pictures from two miles away. I'd say, so if you wanted to hide out on planet earth,

you wanted to get rid of all the fame and want to move somewhere where you're going to hide out on planet Earth. You wanted to get rid of all the fame and move somewhere where you're gonna hide out. Where would you go? Oh, Halifax, you know, Nova Scotia. That's what I was thinking. New Zealand, out where they've, no, the board brings you home. Yeah, New Zealand's very cool. I mean, those places I think are really cool.

I just don't know, I'm not good at going somewhere I don't know one person. It's just too isolated for me. Well, you make friends so easily. You come into the club. Hey, what's going on? You chip. Well, you do a couple of jokes. What's going on? I'm not as social as it seems. I'm too weird. I believe you will tour Australia within the next two years. I would tour Australia or maybe London,

but they always say the first round you don't make a lot because you just see how you sell who knows you, who's heard of you? And then the next time they got to go, they now they have a gauge. I don't want to do. The first, you know, sniffing tour and just reconnect to not make money global though. Yeah, that's like I love the countries, but I just don't know if they don't know me. I don't go go I'm not famous

No chance no chance. I would go to a small village in Tuscany where there's only old Italian people Oh All right We might have had a pretty good show I think we're probably done right. What do you think I think so? Yeah, let's let's wrap it up. I think, Oh, we have the guest. Oh, what am I saying? You can introduce our guests. Um, I'm excited.

Yes. This is, um, very much in the ether for the last few years, but anyway, our guest today is Sarah Edmondson. And she wrote a memoir, Scared, the True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM. Scarred maybe, I think it's scarred. The famous cult, oh scarred. Maybe, but she's scared and scarred.

I made a, I don't know. I think it is scared, or scarred, yeah. It's a double word. But anyway, she was in the NXIVM cult, she has a podcast called Colty, um, a little bit culty podcast. And she talks all about the, how she got involved with Nexium, how, how you get indoctrinated, how you get brainwashed.

And she actually was branded with the initials of the cult leader. And you'll hear all about this coming up next. So we have, we talk about that and we're going to ask her about, uh, the tick tock cult stuff that's in the ether right now. So she's the person to ask about it. So, uh, just stick. Here we go. We'll just clip it right in. The regular season is complete and the ring is set. Are you ready for NHL Playoffs? Get ready for all the action and excitement with BetMGM, the king of sportsbooks. Now's your chance to play along with all the games like never before with Bet MGM's new

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a surefire way to keep what you already have safe and sound. Go to Kraken.com and see what crypto can be. Hi, we started. We actually finished. We just wrapped it up. Is it over? It was great. So good. We're just psychoanalyzing each other. We start we actually finished we just is it over It was great so good We're just psychoanalyzing each other Little bit the two crazy people, you know Dana Dana put me on a calorie count last week

And I was gonna ask you if that's normal or not Are you are you allowed to eat avocados and quinoa? That's the main thing. Cause if you can, I think it's okay. I have to run it by him. Oh, you can? I just, for the record, never counted my calories in Nexium. I was one of the few that was like, that's dumb you guys. But I mean, I was still weight focused.

Cause that was definitely part of the... That's the one that jumped out at you? Yeah, I know. That was a red flag. No, no, I'm not going to do that. I didn't play volleyball either just also for the record, which I think is what saved me in the long run. I mean, well, save me from like the worst. What is a day in a nexium cult? Like what is it? Is it because you do have wi fi, do you have tv? Is it just like a regular? We're just gonna jump in.

I guess we're gonna jump in. Dana, this is Sarah and she. We usually do intros beforehand as well. So we'll record that afterwards. So it won't seem. Well, I guess so for people just joining us, we're live globally. David has just asked Sarah what it was like a day in the life,

i.e. the Beatles, in the cult called NXIVM. And initially it was just a self-help group, right? I mean, that's what you got into in your mind, right? Correct. Yeah. What we see in The Vow and most of the media outlets and podcasts about NXIVM is not what I was experiencing at the time. It was a self-help group. It was a community. I mean, it's a lot of things, the way I talk about it now, it sounds so cheesy, obviously, and cringy for me, but it was a group of people who thought they were working on themselves

and their goals and various projects and using the tech. And I have that obviously in quotes because it's not a technology. It's a, it's basically a C cognitive behavioral therapy and neuro-linguistic programming and some Buddhism and basic life's truths rolled into a nice little package. But a day in the life would be different depending if you were say me living in Vancouver and running my own satellite center or living in Albany in Keith's inner circle, Harem, which also for the record I never was in. No, you weren't in there because these things are always upstate somewhere. It's always a little out of reach.

The upstate New York has a lot of cult groups. A lot. A lot of questionable things are happening. Yeah, culty county, which is east of Albany, I think. Colty County, yeah, it's east of Albany, but I don't know if that means that's that. But you said a second ago, so they refer to the process, the mental mind-bending stuff as technology, right?

Is that kinda like Scientology does that? I think, I'm pretty sure that Keith directly stole that from L. Ron Hubbard. That and a couple other words like suppressive and other practices in terms of keeping people loyal and telling on each other. I don't know who stole from who, but given that Scientology is much bigger and more successful as a cult, I'm guessing that Keith was apparently had Dianetics in his library So we can assume that he So you tell on each other with the phrase someone not really believing or buying into the program is called called a suppressive Yes, or somebody if you have a suppressive thought like if you're jealous of somebody else anything that's not

Upholding and uplifting and full of joy for someone else would be a suppressive thought. Anything that's negative. A lot of comedy is suppressive, technically. Oh my God. Yeah, I mean in that world, I don't think it's a problem. But yeah. Are people lighthearted?

Isn't it like a regular group of fun people or is everything sort of the Stepford Wives? There's a weird vibe. Again, it's depending on where you were. There was Mexico City satellites, there was New York City, I was in Vancouver, there was a school in LA for a bit. Vancouver was a lot of up and coming struggling actors and artists and musicians and entrepreneurs just getting going with their life. Generally, we had a fair bit of fun, but in Albany and upstate, Nippy and I, my husband, whenever we showed up, we're like, does somebody die? And actually some people did at some point,

but it was just this morose, you know, very not fun vibe. It's why I kind of tended to avoid the area as much as I could. I had to go back for trainings and corporate events and stuff. But yeah, back to your earlier question, a day in the life for me would have been

like if it was a training day, if I was working with people, it would be showing up in a little power suit and my sash and greeting people and welcoming them into the center and asking them what their goals were and introducing them to people. And it would be very positive.

And we wanted to create a space where people would essentially, they were doing therapy for 12 to 14 hours a day. So it was pretty intense. Yeah. And you can imagine it in retrospect, I lost my thirties to a very painful situation, but were you sort of the boss? Like did you go to, to Albany and then he says, you're pretty good.

Why don't you splinter off or you started sort of, I took a five day training in Vancouver. It was, there was a school in Seattle at the time and they happened to just do a one-off with the other that I attended. And I thought it was great at the time. And I was running this women's group of actresses who were all starting off and we get together on Tuesdays and do the artist way and talk about like

getting a new agent and updating your demo reel and things like that. And then I got invited to do this program and I came back to my group. I was like, guys, I found the thing that we've been missing. Like we need to do the deeper inner work. We haven't been really getting to the root of it. And so half of them kind of came with me

and the other half thought I was in a cult and we didn't talk for about a decade. We're all friends now, but turns out they were right about that. And that was a hard pill to swallow. But the ones that came with me, I mean, I got to bring some of my best friends with me on this crazy journey,

which obviously sucked for a large part of it. But on the other side, here we are and we were okay. And kind of love my life. Like look at me now. This is great. I get to talk to you guys. This is weird and wild. I got out. That's fantastic. So, so in the early days, it seems like the first thing they would do, I don't know if it's kind of like the military is tell you that you're broken, but in a way that, oh, and we know how to fix you. I'm just wondering where the first hook was where you went, wow, this is awesome. You know, what was that word packages that kind of spoke to you?

Yeah, the hook is important. And it's something that we try to do on our, on our pod is try to understand what every person's unique hook is for whatever it is that they're joining, whether it's a relationship that turns out to be abusive, you know, no one signs up for that. They sign up for something wonderful. And so there's this promise of idealism. Our, my initial hook was actually meeting Mark Vicente. You both have seen The Vow, right? Long time ago, during COVID. Oh yes, yeah. Because David, I remember we messaged about that. Yeah.

I think you just seen it. But Mark Vicente was a filmmaker who brought me in and I met him at this film festival and I loved his film. He had done What the Bleep Do We Know, which at the time was revolutionary. And yeah, and I just remember thinking like, that's the kind of film and TV I want to do. I want to do media that shifts consciousness and gives people. Yeah. At the time I was doing beer commercials and vampire teen things on the Canadian version of Nickelodeon.

I just wasn't doing the meaningful work that I had thought I would do as an actor. So to me that was like, I was going to be his assistant. I would have done whatever he proposed. And he said, oh, I just took this workshop. And the hook for me then was it was a community of like-minded individuals who were trying to make the world better, humanitarians.

And his particular angle was through media and come check it out. And that was, I mean, if it was what it was supposed to be, it would have been great. But it was a front and he didn't know that. Like he was being used in the same way I was later used to bring people in for this false promise. It's all easy-peasy at the beginning.

And then it turns into, there is sort of a sexual thing that comes in. By the way, these guys, I just saw the TikTok guy. He's not Brad Pitt either. They're all like sixes and sevens. I don't know why these guys have so much power. No, you know why? I think it's because they don't, they're not,

they're unassuming, right? Like with Keith, I never, I mean, he's so unattractive. I never was threatened by him in that way. And I think he got into women's pants later, but also minds by providing this like, and Dana and I were talking earlier before he got on about attachment issues and codependency. He slipped into women's first, sometimes DMs, but also created a safe space as like a father figure for women who maybe didn't have such a great relationship with their dad and created a you know a relationship before he was gonna mentor them in other ways which happened later like he did it

in steps because he can't get women in a normal way he's not open with the threesome right no talk about it yeah other. Other stuff. Yeah. You gotta, you gotta, you know, move it up. Is that a kind of a sociopathic thing or how planned is it? So he's talking to a young woman and this is the first tier of what will happen later and it's making them feel good about themselves, that he really cares, all those sorts of cliches. He must have been, had good game in that way, right? Oh, yeah. Yeah. I mean, like I established and I try to be very clear because people make assumptions. I didn't join the harem, but when I had his full attention and he was paying attention to me,

which was rare and I didn't have a lot of alone time with him, it did feel like he was very there. It was like I was special. I was being paid attention to. But he was also, he just was good at rapport. He was a master at rapport. In fact, that was a class that we taught people who didn't have the skill naturally, which you probably, you kind of have to do to be, I think in show business, you have to be able to like

connect with and shoot the shit with people. Some people don't have that skill and they're just awkward. And yeah, he had that in spades. I wouldn't say charismatic. connect with and shoot the shit with people. Some people don't have that skill and they're just awkward. Yeah, he had that in spades. I wouldn't say charismatic. I would say he was a rapport whore and knew how to do it. Well, it seems like a lot of these cult leaders, I don't know a lot of them,

the one in Oregon was the wild country. It's like he drove a, yeah, he drove, he did these things you're not expecting. He's dry. He's really into his Cadillac and he eats junk food and all. And it's sort of, it's the antithesis of what you think, but it's a manipulate unto its own. Like, look, he's really a regular person.

It's all thought out. In other words, like the WeWork guy, I don't know if he could sue me, but it seemed like creating this corporate cult around him. Look, he's almost autistic in his brilliance. I don't know if you could sue me, but it seemed like creating this corporate cult around him. Look, he's almost autistic in his brilliance. He thinks different like us and look at, he doesn't even, his socks don't match, you know, all these tricks that people play.

We actually just did an episode about Ray Dalio and his hedge fund called Bridgewater, which he runs a hundred percent like a cult. Like when I heard how people have to live and operate at Bridgewater, I hope he doesn't sue me. This is from a book that I did not write called The Fund. And I was like, Holy shit. He's basically, he set up his own little cult and calls it a bridge fund. A bridge.

It calls it a hedge fund. And he's just, it's just a little game that he's playing. All the text, but minus the branding and the sex, exactly the same as Nexium. How does the money come into Nexium after a while? We need help here, we're all a group, we get hit, hit your friends up, we have to keep this thing going. Yeah, Keith was always looking for fresh blood.

And you have to pay to join or is it, where does the money come from? Most of the money came from people who had a lot of money. Like when I joined, I was living in a, almost said van down by the river, sorry. In a basement. It's okay. Sorry.

In a basement. Which is getting expensive to get a van by the river. Yeah, actually, especially those like hipster ones. It's all renovated on the inside. It's totally different thing than in the 90s. But no, my rent was like $400 a month. So to spend $2,000 on a five day training, it's a big leap for me.

And I think that's also something that happens, sidebar, and I'll come back to your question, is when people invest that kind of money if they don't have it, they really wanna make their decision a good decision and get the most out of their money. And the sunk cost fallacy prevents them from seeing things that maybe would be more of

a red flag because they don't want to be them. Sort of stick to it? Yeah, they don't look like they made a mistake. People hang in things too long. I've bought things and then I don't take them back right away because I feel so stupid. I don't like it right away and I go, I'll give it six months and then say, I just bought it. Uh, did you think this tick tock thing I just have been hearing about this week is any, any words of advice?

Do you see any problems there or what do you think? We've actually been following that for a while because we've been in touch with some family members and before this was a documentary, we're going to do an episode on it next week. But I see all the same patterns. Yeah, same patterns. Same template, especially with the women who are saying, oh no, I'm fine and I chose this and I'm just committing to God. Anytime you're in a group where an organization is encouraging you

not to speak to your family because, you know, they're not on God's path or they're not in alignment with the values of the blah, blah, blah. Like shunning excommunication is a huge red flag for me. I haven't. The way God wants you to cut everyone off is a tough sell, but it's. Tough sell.

It's very, that one seems like tough because it's very similar already what I've seen is like, and everything's fine. And the guy, I think it's very smart. The main guy has a, like a management company. So it's a great way to get people, young minds that are looking for, you know, you want to be in showbiz, you want to dance, you want to have fun, and they're all doing it together. And then he also coincidentally has a church. So once you're in there, then you start, and then he tells you you're lukewarm. Have you heard that one, Dana? That's one of the manipulative words.

Lukewarm is the best. Hey man, lukewarm. Somebody doesn't want to get into heaven. That's cool. And he's like, wait, wait, what's going on? I'm not in heaven? No. Yeah. Not the way you are. That's such a good point. And he's like, wait, wait, what's going on? I'm not in heaven? No, not the way you are. That's such a good point. Especially with, like we always ask people, so what the hook was that you asked earlier, but what's the promise? Like, what do you think that you're buying into

that's so great? And especially with the religious cults, it's like, you know, being saved, getting into heaven. If you believe that. Heaven's a good payoff. Yeah, I mean, I wasn't raised that way, so it's hard for me to relate, but I kind of do the math, my equivalent was like, I'm doing I wasn't raised that way, so it's hard for me to relate, but I kind of do the math.

My equivalent was like, I'm doing this to be successful. These are the tools that I need to reach my full potential and be successful and be the best, most peaceful, joyful, integrated, non-reactive, you know, Buddha version of myself, which I'm not currently. So if I don't do this path, I'm not gonna have all those things. That's my version of heaven. Like that's how I try to relate to it. And if people really believe that and they have that connection with God, and then

there's some guys saying, yeah, I spoke to God. Like we have a direct line to God, which almost all these religious cults claim that, especially like FLDS and all the Mormon, Jehovah's Witness, they say that. Like I spoke to God and he said, I need to marry you even though you're 12, but God said that I should, so I will. He just took off. Yeah, he was just... I'm 59 and you're 13.

What are you going to do? Talk back to God? Yeah. You can't disrespect God. Your call. Hey, your call. By the way, I don't know how this relates, Sarah, but my wife's Irish nephew, he's very Irish and he's like 35 years of age and he's wandering around LA visiting, right? So he goes to the Scientology Center and he goes through the whole thing and they're about

to- Like just for fun? Well, he's just a curious Irish, I guess I'll go in here. What's it called? And then he said, well, I've been here for an hour and I still don't know what you believe in. And that's the definition of a cult. And then he just stormed out.

I think they escorted him off the property, but they were going to do the E-meter. E-meter? Yeah. Clean meter. I have such fantasies about busting up Scientology, but I think they probably know who I am now. They'll take you out, TootSweet. TootSweet, I love that phrase. Where does that come from?

Where has it gone? Is it Latin? TootSweet, French, TootSweet. Right away. I think you guys, Nixxiom just needed some bigger names, you know? You need someone from a sitcom. They have Tom Cruise, so they're killing it over there. But if you've got, if you can get Taylor Swift, it's over.

Because she's already got her own. Well, Sarah, I have another question. Yeah, this puff daddy thing who my mom says, does he work for Sean? You know, Sean John. I mean, she doesn't understand. But so is that a form of this or from what you've heard, which is mostly bits and pieces and nothing's proved yet, but does that feel like something weird going on over there?

Oh yeah, I mean, I haven't done a deep dive into that, but just from what I've seen, peripherally and superficially, and from my experience being seven years out of this cult is the relationship between an abuser and a victim of domestic violence and a cult leader and their followers is the exact same dynamic. It's the same way of getting someone in, the same love bombing, the same isolation, the same creating an us versus them, us against the world. It's all the same with sex trafficking. It's the exact same way of getting...

And underlying fear, you can't say anything or get out. Right, especially like, I believe he had NDAs, these women had NDAs with him, like that's such a red flag. And same with R. Kelly and Epstein. It's all the same shit over and over and over again. Right. Guy, your podcast is never going to run out of topics. Honestly. Because it's just every day. We do one a week. We have probably like 200 in the pipeline just waiting.

Oh, really? And like other ones we can't get. It's insane. Because we're a bit broader too than just a straight up traditional cult. We're a little bit culty. So things are a little culty. Like, you know, being, being, and I were talking like an acting teacher, it'd be part of like a troupe or a show that, you know. Oh yeah. They, acting teachers, especially vulnerable actors and actresses. I had this acting teacher named Jeff Corey and yeah, he was like a cult figure in a sense. Like he would get, his whole thing was to break people. Like he would start berating

this woman who reads a monologue until she's just sobbing, you know? And I, at the time, I thought, this is just weird. This isn't, this isn't helpful at all. And then she made a couple doing a scene. You're not doing the work. And so he had to take his belt off, get on all fours. She put the belt around his neck and got on top of her and he says, ride him, ride him. I'm like, I go, I just want to be. I'm auditioning for a young Sheldon tomorrow. I'm playing Sir Laughs a lot on Saturday. I don't know if I need a phallic. There's so many culty acting teachers. It's just basically abuse of power, right?

Like when you go into a class, you're saying, hey, you're going to teach me something and I expect you to teach me. And you trust them to do that. There's trust, yeah. There's trust. Yeah. And if we didn't have that, we'd never learn. We'd be like, no tennis coaches or whatever.

But you have to have that. But if they have bad intent or they're a malignant or sociopathic narcissist like Keith, they And if we didn't have that, we'd never learn. It'd be like no tennis coaches or whatever, but you have to have that. But if they have bad intent or they're a malignant or sociopathic narcissist like Keith, then you're in trouble because anything goes. Well, the one thing unique about, maybe it's not unique about Nexium was the people, I guess they called DOS,

the women who got into the situation where they'd be strapped down and branded. Is that a common cult move or was that unique to? I mean, that's just a nice power move. Just one move. Well, it just seems like the most radical thing. You really have to take, you couldn't do it on day one. That's a long process to get them, we're gonna strap you to the table and brand you.

If you get past that, is that sort of like, you're in, that's where you think either this is too far or you think, okay, I got to question some things now. This is getting too far. Yeah. I mean, I was 12 years in, I was fully aware that people thought we were in a cult. And when I saw that I was about to get a brand, I was like, guys, people are, this is really, this is really not good.

This isn't helping our case. Yeah. I even said that like people think we're in a cult already. Do you think this is really, this is really not good. This isn't helping our case. Yeah, I even said that, like, people think we're a cult already, you think this is a good idea? I even, you know, made jokes the day of the Browning, because I was trying to like, you know, make it better for me and for the rest of the women. But I think if that hadn't happened,

I would probably still be coaching a goals program in upstate New York and Vancouver right now, because everything else up until then, I mean, there were problems, lots of problems with the company, but nothing illegal and nothing violent. And I mean, other than the sex behind closed doors, but if I wasn't experiencing that,

I wouldn't have known about it. And in many ways, I'm, I wanna say grateful that it happened, but I'm glad I woke up because, you know, that's not happening anymore. But I will say, I think Keith did that because people were leaving over time. His inner circle wasn't solid. And I feel like he needed to lock down loyalty.

And he thought he was so out of touch with reality, similar to how I think in my opinion, I don't wanna get sued, Tom Cruise might be not in reality. No one's around him going, hey, Tom, that's probably not a good idea. Like no one's gonna tell Tom or Keith no, or David Miscavige no, right? And if it's within that world,

like Tom Cruise who we've met, great guy, but when you're in that world, everyone's okay with it where they are, so it's like why should we have a problem with it? It's sort of, you know, like even Nexium, it's like we're adults who are having sex, even if it's groups, whatever should we have a problem with it? It's sort of, you know, like even Nexium, it's like, we're adults, we're having sex, even if it's groups, whatever, who are we to say? So that's the argument.

Like, are we breaking any laws? It gets very, it's a very gray area, correct? And it is the, the, the women that you were joking around with about the branding, it just seems like, like Keith's getting that idea and he had to share it with other people before the branding process. He pitched it in a sense, right? Because he had other people tying you down and then the other people with the brand. Because it seems like, to go back to, it seems so outrageous that it may be people were hypnotized

into thinking it was magic. But how were you able- At fraternity they do that, they brand it. Well, that was one of the ways they got them to do it. It is true, if you'd introduced it on day one, my five day. So in 12 years from now, you're gonna have the leader's initials seared into your flesh without anesthetic. You didn't know his initials, are they crazy?

If that was on page two of the first pamphlet in the meeting. Oh, the old. No, they don't reveal that, which is by the way, a template called behavior, it's always a bait and switch. Hey, we're selling blah, blah, blah, but it's actually, you know, with Osho, enlightenment, but also getting, do you know that Osho sterilized his women

so they couldn't have babies? Sidebar, sorry. You asked me, David, I did not know. Yeah, that's actually what woke me up. Not the branding itself, but figuring out it was Keith's initials. Was it sideways or something? Yeah. You had to look in the mirror and tilt your head to the side to see the KR. That was in the documentary. Yeah.

Yeah. So until, I think I've lost, it's like somewhere between three and six weeks after getting branded, things were starting to go sideways. And I showed one person, my husband still hadn't even seen it yet because he was in New York, I was in Vancouver, we were traveling and she saw the KR and I lost my shit. And it like everything that anyone ever said about us that we were in a cult or he was, I'd heard like, there was media that he was a pedophile, which I thought was of course a smear campaign

because how could the most noble men in the world be a pedophile? Everything that had ever been told about him all of a sudden in that moment was true. And I was like, holy fucking shit, I'm in a cult and I'm branded with his initials on my body. Like it was the most horrific awakening ever. I could imagine. But it was fast, but it was fast. It wasn't like, but maybe he, you know, should I go back? And like, I was like, okay, I'm out and how the fuck do I get out? Yeah, light bulb.

Dana, you know that I, I branded Dana with my Netflix special. The title of it, he didn't even know. Till it was sideways. Which I can't remember the name of it actually, or I would say it right now. The narcissism, what kind of mind? First she's going to tell everybody that it's just numerals or something.

You're not told it's his initials. It's our symbol. You're told that it's a good thing and we'll all bond or whatever. What kind of sociopath, what kind of mind, like how does he, how do you think he rationalized that? Did you ask him, did you say, hey, is this KR coincidence or what's going on? I never spoke to him about it. Unfortunately, as soon as we were decided we were out, we were did this whole double

agent thing where we were pretending to be in, but then trying to let people know, which eventually got busted after a couple of weeks because somebody called me and recorded me. Trying to do a jailbreak. Yeah, I did. I was like, don't go. They were like, I'm supposed to go to Albany. And I heard that. No, no, no. I'm like, don't go to Albany. And they were recording me. And that got sent to Keith. Oh no, you got popped. I got killed. And it was, you can't write this shit. Like I'm 40, I was 40 at the time,

going to the FBI and trying to explain to them that I did this and also willingly. Like it's on, I'm on camera saying, master would you brand me, you'd be an honor. Which, you know, like, and that's what Keith did. So no, no, I can laugh, it's fine. I'm seven years old. This is crazy.

It is crazy, but that's how brilliant slash dumb he is because he set it up to make it look consensual. But he filmed, he recorded himself talking to Alison Mac, explaining how she should do it to answer your earlier question. He got Alison Mac on board who explained it to all the women. So it looked like it was coming from a woman.

So smart, but also dumb because he recorded it and Alison Mack saved that. And then India found the thumb drive and gave it to the FBI and they played it in court. And up until then he's like, yeah, the women did this for me. I mean, who, like if they want to brand themselves in my initials, like that's up to them. No, he created it, his idea.

He planted the seed. He said, he even said, put their hands up like this. So it looks sacrificial and you know, like it was all his idea. So he's, you know, where's Alice Mack is she, she's out. She did two years. Oh, okay. Yeah. And, uh, and I have not spoken to her.

I would love to, when I'm allowed to, there's a lot of people I have not spoken to her. I would love to when I'm allowed to. There's a lot of people I can't speak to yet because they're still- Facebook friends, nothing? I wish. I mean, I'm dying to. I just want to hug her and hope that she's doing okay. She has a new, a Western out, I think, where she plays part of a cowgirl who brands cows. Oh, geez.

Oh, no. Oh, no. That's called Yellowstone. This is not the place for jokes. Oh, well, no, I'm sorry. By the way, you've seen Yellowstone, right? Yeah. Oh yeah.

That was the first show I watched where I was like, I need to watch, I think it's not cult related and I just need like a little break from the cult. And then they're branding each other with it, like literally searing each other with the Yellowstone. Not this again. Why? I was like, God, you guys, come on, be original.

They seem to think it's cool. Yeah. Okay, I have some just general questions. Sure. Some wrap up. If people are listening now, think they may be codependent or like, you answer this,

if you're in a bad relationship with someone, say you have an abusive boyfriend and he's breaking you down and complimenting you, is that, that's a, it's not literally a cult, but it's cult each, um, it's codependency, it feels like to me, what, what saved you was that you got in touch with anger because, because when you're always like trying to please your master and you get in this codependent way, don't make him mad and he means well or she means well.

So was that, I think that's a great emotion to try to cultivate, no pun intended, if you want to get away from a destructive relationship, get mad. Because it sounded like you got really mad once you saw the KR. That was anger. I did. Yeah, I did get really mad. And I also in Nexium and most cults, you're not allowed to be reactive. It means that you have an issue, which up until that point, like was the inner gas lighting or outward gas lighting of, oh, you seem really angry about that. Why don't you talk to your coach and maybe journal on it and see what you come up with?

That kind of thing. So it was, it's always flipped back to you. And for the first time I was like, no, it's okay that I'm angry because you lied to me. And that's, I think, what most people don't understand is that you can't consent to something if the initial agreement is false, which is what happens in a domestic violence relationship

as well. The abusive person is presenting a false persona to hook the victim. It's a lie. My last one is, go ahead, Kate Taven. No, I just- I have unlimited time. You can ask me whatever.

No, we have to do our own stupid podcast. Back in 19, how is your marriage is good? Was your husband part of next season as well? I met him there. Oh, okay. Yeah. All right, and so- He's really jealous that he's not here.

Oh, well he could have come up. Next time. Say hello, but then so when jealous that he's not here and oh well, he kind of come up He say hello, but so when you got out, did he get out at the same time? Yes, we were we got out at the same time and if you if you recall probably my favorite part of the vow is he went in around the time that we were doing our double agent thing and have confronted the leadership which nobody ever did and Recorded himself being like, what the fuck, you branded my fucking wife? Which was so rewarding for me because we never got to say, like we were so obedient and I didn't realize how obedient we were until we got out. We would never say, no, I disagree with that. Nothing, because you'd get in trouble. So for him going

in there and telling them off, it was just, oh, I just wish he'd flipped over the egg buffet table or something because that would have just, you know, and he didn't because he didn't want his friends to have to clean up the mess, which was very kind of him. Cause so a lot of the people there were innocent bystanders, but yeah, we're fine. We do a lot of therapy. Our podcast together is very rewarding. I'm working on a second book of everything we've learned since the podcast, which is so much we want to be able to give it to other survivors so they don't have to listen to 200 episodes. Sure. All right. So very, very quickly, what are the top three or five warning signs you may be in codependency or if you were Jeff Fox in a cult? You may be in a cult.

If Jeff Fox were these in a cult with Ron White, is there... I would say... There's someone listening right now. Yeah. If you feel, first of all, isolated, whoever is with you has isolated you from your friends and family or encouraged you not to have relationships with people that you love. You feel like you can't talk to them or have honest conversations with them about what's going on. If you feel that the leader or the person is the ultimate authority and you have to defer to them or run things by them and you can't question

them without feeling gaslit or I mean, one of the main things I've learned since I've been out is if you feel like something's not right and you're questioning like, is this right? And wait, did he just say that? And then you start catching yourself going, well, well, maybe he just had a bad childhood or, you know, making excuses for the person or the thing. That's a real red flag you really need to look at. If you don't feel good with somebody and you don't even have to call it a cult. Like, take that word out of the equation because it gets so overused. Is this a good dynamic? Like, is this a healthy dynamic? Do I want to be here? Do I feel like safe and heard and all the good things? And you may not, and it may be normalized to feel that way, especially if you've maybe had a bad childhood and that's kind of normal to, to feel less than, or it was trying to like get the

approval with little breadcrumbs from the person who's holding the power. Those are some examples. So David, I, you do none of that to me. I mean, I'll just go on record. Don't breadcrumb me, Dana. Comedians are too aggressive and damaged in different ways, I think, to be gaslit. I'm sure we get in a way, but... Do you think that there are any, is there any famous comedians that have been in cults

that we know of? Famous comedians. Was Martin Short? No, he's not a comedian. Stand up? Uh, Martin Short, I think just you start to get in a- Not Martin Short, we're joking. If you get in a situation where someone's the boss or someone is, you know, it's just like anything, you just get sort of swept up into something where everyone's

doing it, it can happen. It doesn't- cult is like using a hammer to, to sledgehammer to say what it is. It's more like a lighter. There's just these warning signs. I think we get, we all are, are. Yeah. And if you have, if you're in show business, you're vulnerable and you have people who work with you. And I'll just say it's a, it's a peculiar dynamic. It's an interesting dynamic that you, it's hard to describe it, but show business has some colorful characters.

Oh yeah. Hollywood itself. What about Saturday Night Live? Was it ever, not culty, but like, was it, do you ever feel like you couldn't speak up or like? We're going to meditate after read through. Your mantra will be Lauren. It'll be groups. Then we'll face the sun and ask for forgiveness of our sins. I don't come on my podcast and tell me everything. No, I think that Lauren, I mean, he's dealing with a lot of comedians. Yeah.

So fragile. And that we're supposed to poke holes in all the authority and everything and deconstruct society. So that would temper it a bit. But anyone who's a powerful boss, not Lauren, corporate boss, anybody can kind of try to create a cult of personality around them. Like Bill Gates did with Microsoft, that Bill has to go away for two weeks and he reads a hundred books his brain doesn't work like you and all that stuff it's not

necessarily gone to tattoos and branding but there's cultiness everywhere that's why you'll never your podcast will last for as long as you want to do it. Can I die? Sarah, thanks for jumping on. will last for as long as you want to do it. Until I die. I get bored of it. You look 27. Yeah, you look great. I'm glad that you got out. And you're probably... You've ruled out cults forever,

probably, we can safely say. I think so. I think so every now and then. I still do yoga, but there's a lot of super, super culty yoga practices. I try to like, just stay like, no dogma, just like hot, sweaty power yoga, no notes. Just do the hour and get out.

Yeah, and I'm doing the research on Nexium. I don't know, I started to get a little hip incised into the good side of it. And so I'm pretty much glad you got out of it, but not totally. Well, the good stuff, part of my healing has been like, what was good? And then figuring out who invented it or who created it, cause it wasn't Keith.

I just thought for many years that it was Keith. So, you know, I could still do some of the things. Yeah. I hate power mad people trying to control, manipulate people, narcissistic, social pass. I'm going on record. Don't like them. Yeah, narcissistic, social pass. I'm going on record. Don't like them. I don't like them either. And there's a lot of them. There really are. And you just got to watch it because they look like normal people and they know how to act.

Yeah. Narcissists are, can be very, very clever and narcissists seek out empathetic people or non-narcissistic people. And then there's that codependent dance that happens where one side is beholden to the other. And so yeah, it's everywhere. Scary. I have an episode to send you, Dana, from Dr. Romany, who's a narcissist expert. We did a couple episodes with her and she's such a badass and explains exactly what you just said. It's in relation to cults specifically and domestic violence. Yeah. My childhood and probably David's childhood was full of some of this stuff. Go on.

I'm sorry. Well, it's nothing, you know, it's comedian. You mean Uncle Keith? Keith Reneviel. Which by the way, Nipi always says the KR was Keith Richards. That's his joke. That's a good one to sell to people. Yeah. I'm sure not everyone's seeing it.

I thought it was a Rolling Stones like a coat. He's the happiest person in the world. That was Keith Richards. Very happy. I'm taking Nippy to the Rolling Stones for his 50th birthday. So we joke that the scar is K.R. but I did have, I mean, Keith Richards, but I did have it removed just for the record.

I had it taken off. I had plastic surgery a couple of years ago because it was like, you know, I just didn't want it there. Sure. I needed it for a little bit just to be like, hey guys, you know, hey FBI, this happened. And then I was like, yeah, I'm done with it. It's not funny.

Moving on. No. All right, thank you, Sarah. Well, thanks, Sarah. Good luck with the podcast. Thank you guys. And send me that episode. You can get my email from what you wrote.

I will for sure. I'd like to. Awesome. Thank you guys. Thank you for the great questions. I feel really taken care of. This has been a presentation of Odyssey Superfly as executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade, Jenna Weiss-Berman of Odyssey, Heather Santoro

and Greg Holtzman. Hope you liked it.