Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade - SUPERFLY #31 - Deep State w/ Danica Patrick

Episode Date: August 30, 2024

The guys speed through the headlines before being joined by Danica Patrick to chat about racing, conspiracies, and dating. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

the game. to wager Ontario only. Gambling problem? Call Connex Ontario at 1-866-531-2600. FedMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. RINGING Hamburglar, why are you calling? Rubble, rubble. McDonald's has a new biggest burger called Big Arch, made with two 100% Canadian beef patties,

a new delicious sauce, and all the McDonald's flavors you love, and wait, you want me to help you get it? Rubble! Come on. Compared to beef burgers on McDonald's current menu at participating restaurants in Canada. Wait, let me ask this. Was MK Ultra a real thing in Hollywood? Oh, you're asking the two top reps of Hollywood?

Yeah, why more than me? That's true. David, you would know. We are recording and we are coming in hot from Cleveland. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, Dana, aside, uh, from your hair, which we're going to just don't over talk about, but, uh, we will talk about if we started, I guess we did cause we never know that I

did. Oh, people got mad. We said Chiquita is wrong last week. Fine. But the Chiquita bit was funny. Chiquita bit was a hit. Yeah, it was funny. And I apologize for the mispronunciation. But we still don't know. We still say Chiquita. What is it? Chiquita? I think it's Cicada, which is dumb. Okay, let's get an S in there. I went to state school. Let's get an S in there because it's C. Yeah, make it easy for everyone. Fuck that.

C-K-duh. How about filthy flies on steroids that pee? Yeah. Oh, that's right. Remember they peed all over everyone? They should call them picadas. Picadas. They should call them urinatas.

Yeah, they're sickening, and I've had it with them, but it was a good story. Also I went to a concert this weekend. I'll just buzz through that quickly. Went to a concert because we had Joe Elliott on our sister podcast. Love Joe. So here's what happens. I go to a concert for Def Leppard Journey and Steve Miller. And we had Joelle in on, I had already bought tickets and I scalped them because I wanted

to sit right up front and no shenanigans just so I could see, so I could enjoy life. It's cool to be in front of the cool people. And it's a sofa where they have football games where they should really, all kidding aside, only have football games because concert it's a little big. You talk about low ceilings in a comedy club. There's almost no ceiling. It's a few tarps up there and it's half open air.

Sound goes fucking everywhere. So I go in and they go, oh, I just follow my ticket and I'm in the highest level and I go, I tell some guy, uh, where's this? Cause I'm, I'm on the floor. I need to get the floor and he goes, you're on the floor. Don't fuck you're right here. And I go, no, but I were on the floor. I wasn't a floor.

That's where I bought the tickets. But you didn't. Okay. When I got there, they, I got bamboozled. So I walk around and sit up. So I'm on the side of the stadium, looking down at honestly, like when they parachute in, that's kind of the view I have.

Good, good, good. So that's shitty, right? Because it says SoFi Stadium. That's your view? That's where I'm sitting. And that's the stage. And there's some dude in front of me that needs conditioner, but that's a whole nother story.

But his hair, this biker. I love a man in a ponytail. He wasn't bad because we talked the whole concert and he didn't say one thing. So we're sitting there and these dogs had seats and I think I was almost, I couldn't see it because I was behind Aaron Donald's retired Jersey. And then it's funny. And then, um, sorry, because they're at the rafters, you know? So that one, and everyone looked like an ant farm

down there because everyone's just milling about. Now this is when Steve Miller goes in, right at the very beginning. And Steve Miller, I love, but I have to get there in six to see him. And it's really just a corporate gig because no one cares at all. It's light, there's barely a roof, and everyone's just looking around for $20 beers.

Milling around and walking with their drinks. Yeah. Exactly. And I'm like, you hear a banal, I'm like, this one, everyone's like, anyway. No one cares. Like an eagle. Yeah. And he used to fill stadiums like this on his tours.

He's still filling them, but they're just, you got to pick your chunk. Cause everyone here is clearly old. Cause death left for a journey, you know? So it's five straight hours. So you have to pick, do I come a little late? Do I come, you know, whatever. So I want to see Steve Miller and I'll just see how far I can get being a colossal pussy. This is what my doctor said.

So I go there. Good doc. Steve Miller does great gets off. But then there's 25 minutes of downtime. And they got to put the other stuff up. Journey, new singer. You've heard that, right? Not new anymore, but. Totally. Yeah. The impressionist of Stephen Perry has been with them for a long time. Yes. He's brilliant. Yeah. But there's only one Steve Perry. Sorry. Right. And this guy has got a great voice. I thought he was Bobby Lee for the first 10 songs, but fine. But I can't see. That's not my fault. So he sings,

they do great. And if I'm Def Leppard, I don't like Journey A doing an hour and a half. And hogging. The beefiest stand up. That's the best part of the night. Everyone's in it. It's dark now. Yeah, the energy. They close that killer song on the Sopranos and then they do confetti. You cannot before the headliner. As a middle, they do confetti? Fuck, in the middle act, it's doing fucking confetti. People are heading for the headliner. As a middle, they do confetti? Fucking the middle act was doing fucking confetti. People are heading for the parking lot. Where's Z4, sir? Where's the Z lot?

I've parked in LAX, I'm supposed to walk to SoFi. So I was like, Def LeBron needs an A and no fucking confetti clause immediately. And also they're closing with that big song. So you do need that break. So they flip the stage again and then here comes to a flip. Now I'm a thousand percent burned out because it's, I'm in there four hours already, you know? And I'm also back where I'm just taking selfies because everyone's like, Oh, you look like the guy that should be down there. And I go, yeah, but I'm the guy that got fucking ripped off.

So I'm up here. Oh, here we go again with the photo just to remind everyone, this is where I was. Well, the old fashioned thing where there's no roof, but you would be in the nosebleeds, right? That's where they get the name. Yep, makes sense. So I'm up there busting my hump and the guy from Depp Lefford, obviously one of the drummers has one arm we talked about,

but they have another drummer to make sure it makes sense, but he's only got one arm, but it's the other arm. So it works. You know what I mean? Before the meeting, they go, okay, you do the one in three beats and I'll do two fours. That's one, two, three, four. It's hard to sync up. But if they had an ad in the paper, we need someone with a missing left arm or missing right arm.

Most said miss arm and they said left preferable. But not a deal. Well, I'll just say that guy, hey, I wanna defend drummers everywhere. Cause you know, I used to pound this. I would fiddle around with them. Deaf leopards, brilliant drummer, lost his arm in an auto accident.

And they never thought of letting him go. And then he reinvented the drums, which is now state of the art, where you can do so many things with your feet. Anyway, continue. And his legs are an overdrive. Because he's making so much noise with the legs to take away from the fact.

So anyway, he did say that when he sleeps sideways, it used to hurt when he'd sleep on his arm, but now it's pretty easy. You know what I mean? There's no pain. So that's one upside, I guess. So other than that... I have five questions, but I want you to finish your story. I think that's it.

I left. I didn't even finish. More Joely. I almost hit him up from backstage and said, get me out of here. Give me back. Do something. But I felt so dumb that he offered me tickets on the podcast. Then I go, no, no, no, I got this.

I don't need your chair. Okay. That was one of my questions. Okay. The lead singer of one of the greatest rock bands in history invites you to his show. Come on, be my guest. Come on. And then you're in row 138.

So that confused me, but you had to get the tickets yourself. Show it again. Yes, that's the picture. So I have more pictures on my phone, but I want to overwhelm you because it's just funny. I have an observation from that picture. Isn't it interesting slash funny that in the heyday of certain kind of COVID stocks that went crazy like SoFi, then they get a trillion dollar stadium named after them, but their stock right now is like 48 cents.

I don't know what SoFi was. Well they had crypto this and SoFi that. And it's like the companies barely exist. We might get letters on that one. They give the naming rights, they realize all their money is gone and they only have this stadium. The stock peaked for like a week and then they got two trillion dollar stadiums built and they just are stuck with Burger King.

No Burger King's huge. I went to Green Day they call it in the 70s and I got, yeah, big, big concerts, big five hour party concerts. You do not smoke weed. You don't take mushrooms. You don't really drink much. You raw dog it? No, I mean you, David, at that five hour concert, if you had taken mushrooms,

smoked some weed, had two Tito's neat, you would have been higher than the stadium. But you were just sitting there. I literally bought a Brewski. I don't really drink beer. I drink vodka. But you go to a bar and they're like, oh, we're only the Bud Light bar. Or we're only the vodka bar. We're the, you know, whatever's sponsored. So you can only get one thing.

So I got two beers and 20 bucks each. No joke. It's no joke. No joke. 20 bucks each. Thanks Biden. Flations coming down. Anyways.

Flations coming down. Yeah. The beers less than $20 to put in the beers. So that's the thing I did in my youth where you didn't mind the crowds. You didn't mind you couldn't see anything. You didn't mind the sound was... Well, let me ask you, was the sound good at least because it's so fine? No. No. So sound bad, can't see, invited by the lead singer of the biggest rock band. Did you at least have a driver or were you circling the parking lot? Like a Disneyland. This song's good.

Is it Journey Still? I don't know. It's a good song. David, David, literally I saw Fleetwood Mac in their prime and all I heard was, all I heard was the kick drum, no vocals, nothing. And very faint in the background, now there you go again.

But yeah. And I lands, I wanna. I can always tell, I go, I can't hear the singing right sometimes they jack up the other shit. You love it when they go on the club tour or the small theater tour and then you get to see them but that that that's a that's not fun. That aside we'll keep moving we're gonna hit the stories. We, that was- We'll keep moving. It was fun anyway. I made it, you know what, Dana? I made it fun.

I didn't cry about it. I honestly didn't cry about it. I go, oh my God, look at our tickets, we got rat fucked. All right, well, we're sitting up here now. So let's make the best of it. Anyway. Yeah, you have exciting adventures. I went to the local car wash.

What was I gonna do? Get a 10 minute chunk on getting sprayed. Well, actually it's one of those you drive through and it just sprays you. So this old guy, there's old guy went in before me and then it's all, and the green light, he's supposed to go, he starts to back up. I'm gonna do it again.

I'm honking, you can't hear him. No, cause he had a flashback of like Viet Cong. And he's like, you get out of here, back it up everyone, run her down. Who backs up in a car wash? Not literally not one person. You shouldn't be driving if you think you might have to back up in a car wash.

There's a big tunnel. You can see the light at the end of the tunnel. The guy's really good. I don't want to die. And it goes back. They want me to come that way. That's where you don't wanna go. Okay. All right, well, what's the first story?

Well, this is just an observation, culturally about politics. And then we'll get into some other things, couple things. It's just funny to me, Trump's lineup now. This is a rebellious lineup. First it started with a thing where they have Hulk Hogan and then the Democrats answered with James Taylor. I mean, that's just funny to me. Now you listen to me, brother. Brother, you got a friend, brother. So anyway, that

was Hulk Hogan doing James Taylor. And they go, the next guy's Hulk is timely. I'm not going nowhere, brother. That's one of his catchphrases. You're not going nowhere. I have to explain, I utilize the camera. Maybe too much so far. Well, no, I love anybody who ends what they're making a point and say, brother, at the end, I'm having a

cheeseburger brother. It's funny. So it's Tulsi Gabbard. She's a badass outside the box. Bobby Kennedy Jr. need I say more. They've got Obama, Clinton's Beyonce, Taylor Swift, Oprah. Oh yeah, they got a fucking lineup. Yeah, I mean, it's like they're so cool.

And the Trump thing, people should just vote on those. Who's got better stars? Yeah, I knew it was going to be them. Cast a care. This is your cast of characters. Hulk Hogan, Tulsi Gabbard, Bobby Kennedy Jr. Or it's Taylor Swift. You know. Taylor hasn't said it yet, though, but I think we're guessing, but Taylor hasn't.

I think she's smart not to get, I don't think it's all her fans, but you know. No, no, I don't know if she's even out there yet. I talked to Tucker Carlson about this premise last night and all I heard on the phone was ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha That's what I'm saying. Here comes the Tucker. That's pretty good. He goes, yeah.

Who's doing this and why are they doing it? I don't know. I'm trying. I'm trying. We're working for literally for free. Okay. But we're having fun. Speaking of politics, for free. Okay. But we're having fun. Speaking of politics, there was the Mark, well, two things.

There was a Zuckerberg thing. Do you have anything on that? Where Zuckerberg or Zuckerberg came out and said he was pressured by the government to censor COVID information and the Hunter Viola. So it was sort of a thing that you do that. And then six months from now, they're going to have him in Congress. And they're going to have our friend, Senator John Kennedy. Yeah, the new the new Ross Perot is going to love him. And he grills people. Oh, yeah. But he does it in such a slow

southern way. Now, Mr. Zuckerberg, did I get that right? Did I get that right? Now, you wrote a letter saying that the United States government pressured you to censor content. Did I get that right? Then you got Zuckerberg. Yes, Senator. First of all, thank you for the question. They always say that. Yeah. It's basically them saying fuck you. First of all, thank you for the question. And that is indeed true. Well, can I ask you a question? Can I ask you a question?

Do you believe that a mosquito could fart its way out of a hornet's nest? Do you believe that? Did I get that right? That's an interesting question. I took your fart thing from the last John F. Kennedy. You know, Mr. Zuckerberg, let me get my cheaters on. Now, first of all, it's colder than a penguin's pecker in here. I have to say, I'm getting a draft. Could we turn that down? Now, it's colder than a well digger's ass, and I'm not, I have a codum. Mr. Zuckerberg, have they been fiddling with the election a little bit? I'm confused.

I'm confused. I'm confused. Do you think it's a good thing or a bad thing to be censored by a girl? Yeah. That dog don't hunt with me, Jeff. I'm old school. I like to just let whoever wins, win. Zuckerberg, you know, I find it interesting that your name is Zuckerberg and your platform,

Facebook or whatever you call it, sucks. Do you know that it sucks, Mr. Zuckerberg? He actually said that. That's not me doing comedy. And you're saying he's like Zuckerberg. Zuckerberg's like an AI of himself. Bita sits there. Interesting. Thank you. Thank you very much for the question, Senator. Did we mess with the election? I mean, you could, some people would say, beep-bop beep-zoom-zoom-zoom.

Lo-ba-da-da-da-da. And you got Hunter Biden's laptop too. They didn't get that out there. Oh, yeah. You know, I looked at a few photos on there. It's quite explicit. His dick is harder than Chinese arithmetic in some of the photographs I have seen. The boy lives a full life.

Now you thought it was Russian disinformation to have Hunter Biden naked, set for a g-string, with a woman on all fours, chained up with a dog collar on. He's got a gun in his hand, a whip and cocaine on her bottom. And somehow you thought that was Russian Dissert. Did I get that right? Where was the confusion?

I'm wearing glasses, it's funny to go like this. Your words, your words, not mine is another thing he says. Now this is something you said. I'm just reading what you said. Your words, not mine. All right. What was that other picture they showed? Okay. That's 20 minutes. Yeah. Immigration. Now this one was All right. What was the other picture they showed? Okay, that's 20 minutes. Yeah, immigration. Now, this one was, oh, California is close to approving $150,000 loans for illegal immigrants

to purchase homes. Now, I don't know if this one's real because I know three people of my friends been trying to buy a house for 10 years at least. And that seems like slightly unfair to me personally, like 150 grand, zero interest. Oh yeah, they give a 20% down payment. Wow. So that scares me because I just saw, oh well, forget it. You just saw forget it. You just saw, forget it. Well, there's a, in Aurora, Colorado, there's a Venezuelan gang that took over two apartment complexes and they're making the people pay rent to them. So I'm like, it's just getting nerve wracking.

I don't really know, I don't understand all the complexities, but I can tell you I'm slightly nervous about the situation. First of all, that one seems unfair. People should be able to buy a house. You shouldn't have to rip up your citizenship card and say, okay, now I want to get a house and like, oh, okay. Um, so you're for sure not a citizen. Okay.

Here's 150 because that would help anybody out. That's such a, I mean, unless you live in California, you can get a house, $150,000 now payment. That's great. It's would seem to be a little incentivized. I put it on the price is right. So the price is right is streamed all over the world. And price is right. So come on down. So if you're sitting in some teapot country and they say, we'll basically give you a house if you can get here, I would get there.

And the Venezuelans, the only thing I like about that gang is it's very American. It's very industrious just to get armed, take over two apartment buildings and start charging rent. Yeah, they're immediately on the gates. I mean, that's very sophisticated. By the way, I'm on Twitter. I'm like, I just think I should be a machete salesman. I mean, the funniest thing about, not funny, but there's so many people that have machetes now out there in the world that are going bananas all over the world. I'm like, when did machetes make a comeback?

I can't find one. There's none in my house. There's none on my block. back. I can't find one. There's none in my house. There's none on my block. Frank, my friend, assistant, is a machete salesman. He served in the United Nations via Ireland in Liberia. And every adult male in the village just walked around with a machete. So you'd be having a casual conversation with someone. And he's got a giant sword in his hand ready to take your head off.

It's a very threatening thing to hold him. Well some of the countries don't have as many guns and it's big on stabbing. So if people are bad people and they want trouble, you don't have to have a gun. So stab someone and still cause a bit of a ruckus. Okay. I wonder if the Venice one, my last thing about the Venice women gang is did they, they took over and charged rent.

Did they perchance lower the rent? Could there be a silver lining to the story? There might be. I saw a video of it. It didn't look like that, but. Listen, there is mom. What you pay last time? And do they let.

700, okay. Give me 600. Americans in the gang. That would be racist if they did not. No, obviously we're being pithy. It's so outrageous. I can't. It's so crazy. I don't even know how to. But I don't know what's real and what's not anymore.

So I don't know. Some of these stories. That's yeah. This is a segment we call, is it real? I don't know what's real and what's not anymore. So I don't know. Some of these stories put on YouTube. This is a segment we call, is it real? It's called, there's no way. Okay, let's get to some doofy Instagram videos. Let's get some headlines. See if we can get some laughs.

Oh, this is another dumb one where they use spade. I don't really get this one because there was one where it's a photo on a building in Austria where it's me and it says a Kurt Cobain quote at the bottom but it's actually a Neil Young quote. So people, it generates interest because people have to go, no, that's not Kurt Cobain and no, that's not even his quote and no, that's not Kurt Cobain and no, that's not even his quote. And no, that's whatever. Not the dang. This is, this is the same shit at Steve, which is a, which is one I follow, but they're selling shirts, I think that say dang.

This is based on Kendrick Lamar's album, but it's showderm. Why are they putting, now this time we go back to center. Why would they put David Spade face on a supposed quote from Kurt Cobain? I don't know. I think it generates people laughing and they get, they come and go, no. So the more engagement they have, is that it Heather? They just want people to say, they love it.

Well, and also you kind of have rock star hair there. I could be, if you're younger, I look like some, yeah, it could be anybody. But there's also a place selling a shirt with a hallway picture of me, Farley, and Sandler on it. I think it says, I'm going to tell my kids this was Nirvana. That's funny. That's not bad. Yeah, that's not bad.

But it's a picture of us. They're selling like, I don't think you're allowed to sell pictures of you I'm not gonna win that battle, but I just thought that was funny because of course Everyone sent that to me. They're like look at this. I'm like, I don't really get it. But okay All right. Next one. Oh, this is a funny joke Those astronauts in space, you know, they're stuck and Elon Musk is trying to save them. They're stuck, what a fucking ripoff. I know, so embarrassing. It's like an elevator.

Yeah, you're stuck in space though. They're supposed to be good. They might be gone till 2025. And here's the guy's joke. Humanity has about six months to purchase 8 million, 8 billion ape costumes for the ultimate prank. Because remember Planet of the Apes? He comes back and he realizes everyone's on apes.

Is that funny? I like that. I mean, that's a funny, that's a funny joke. I just think this was a gigantic thing because NASA hired Elon Musk, SpaceX and Boeing like 2015 to develop rockets to go to the space station. So Boeing had some problems. You know, SpaceX has done 220 missions. Okay.

Yeah. Actually, it was more like, I believe it's 300 missions. But anyway, a little Elon Musk for you. But I'm working on it. But Boeing, Boeing was supposed, this was their big, big maiden launch, all these delays. And then the thrusters go out. Womp womp.

Boop boop boop boop boop boop. And the astronauts supposed to be home in two days. And now they've been there. Ironically and weirdly, it's a man and a woman and they are engaged newsflash on Saturday. Is that true? No, I made that up. Are they gonna run out of Tang? Tang is still a reference. Not moon tang, Dan. Because they did Tang in the 60s, right? Tang was orange powder drink and I was a kid and I wanted it because they said that's what

the astronauts drink in space. Yeah, it was just powdered sugar, something horrible for you. But it was super orange. We had it. Oh, so fucking orange. Yeah. And I mean, no, it was the orange is the orange I've ever seen. They should call it orange. I know Tang was a weird name, but I liked it. It was so weird. Do you remember high CC? You're too young. Do you remember Hi-C? I am young, but no, I do remember it, unfortunately. Cans of juice. Remember Hi-C? Hi-C was the greatest red dye fructose corn syrup. Worst fucking thing. Yeah, it was just hyper sweet, but it was in big cans, right?

Love it. Love it. Yeah. Oh, it was like this? Like a big candy. You did the can opener on top. Yeah, can opener. And it was made in Japan. Did you know that? Hi, I see. No.

Oh boy. I did not. I did not. You did not know that, okay? Now, can I ask? No, next story. I'm not gonna do any more challenge. He's canceled. Okay, here's funny nurses preparing for the monkeypox pandemic. Action.

I like how nurses are always having time to do TikToks. It's pretty funny. The hospital right now is fucking crickets. They're like, we have to run over to Radio City and do our- One, eight, go, Emmy. Today, S, R, four, three, two, one. All right, that's enough. I am. We get it. You always start talking and I'm just God smacked.

I'm like, what? I know, it's funny. What am I looking at? Just, it's funny because on TikTok, nurses are always doing bits in the hospital. And then you know, you pan over someone's like, because you're like, are you on a break? When do you have time to do this? But I don't mind. I just think it's not that adventurous. They're just hopping

around with clouds. They should have mimed and had a whole dance choreography around changing out an IV on a patient. Ooh, ta, ba ba ba ba ba. Bedpan. Or play the bedpan like stomp, like that show stomp. Have you, you probably, you haven't been in the hospital much. I've had a few nights in there, but they say,

would you like a bedpan or do you think you can make it six feet to the bathroom? I'd like the pan. I like the pan. I'm going to jam a pan under your buttocks. And you can stay and watch me and then take it away. No, I'll make it to the bathroom. When you pee, do you usually have a rod?

Because we are trying to figure out, is it going to go straight up? Because if you're lying on your back and you can't move, so they lift your buttocks area and put a bed pan under so you can take it to the bathroom. What a hero. We can put a thing up your urethra or if you could make it two feet to the bathroom, we won't have to do that. They, when I got my hernia, her hernia, I got a hernia. And then when I woke up, she goes, all right, it's time for the catheter.

She grabs my wiener and she takes like basically a number two pencil, whatever it is, it's too big to go on your wiener. And she rams it in with two people from Game of Thrones. Like, Ram! I screamed so Heather heard me. I screamed across the room because I'm like, why now? I was out cold for four hours. Wake up, wake up for the worst pain in your life.

Wait, are you up? Okay. Hi! You could have slid it in like this. Like, you know what I mean? Yeah, they get it in there and I'm like, wah! And then they say, can you? and they go, you probably can't pee for a couple days.

It's totally appropriate. You're making those sounds. I had something funny happen to me in that world. It's funny now. So I'm getting a stent, you know, this years ago, but anyway, so after the thing, they want you to pee into a plastic bottle, but it had a serrated edge they didn't tell me about. So that I was I had so many blood thinners in my system that there was a little cut on my wiener as you would say it wouldn't stop. So first of all, there was a very

pleasant rotund woman with gloves on that just held my member for about three hours with their finger and Yeah pinching it. Yeah. Oh, no, so it's a thumbs on it. So it's covering 80% of it. That's terrifying No, I was I was doing and then a dude came in and he took over a dude nurse No, I really I really Wayne's World fan. So yeah, so then he had to grab, hold it and retain pressure for another eight hours. Dude, I just loved Wayne's World, man. I mean, how'd you guys make that movie? This I'm not even making this up.

I've never told this story. Some of my blood is leaking. Can you adjust your thumb? Anyway. Oh, yeah. Anyway, we could you have more pressure and then less pressure, more pressure and less pressure and move up and down? Oh, that's such a funny movie. You want am I still tickling your balls? No, that was never part of it. Oh, I thought that's what she was doing. Okay. Anyway, so

You got a wig on You're like this, what's the he was No, i'm saying the guy just had a lot of questions. He's like Mike Myers, he was the nurse. No, I'm saying the guy just had a lot of questions. He's like, okay, I guess this is the part where I put my finger up your butt. You're like, no, no, I don't know where you're getting the wrong instructions. I'm just bleeding out of my wiener right now.

No, I'm here just to get my blood pressure checked. I don't need any kind of fisticuffs. All right, let's, on that note, we should probably bring Danica out. This was shot a couple of days ago, and so we might be wearing something different. But Danica Patrick is a supreme race car driver. She's a very good athlete across the board. The first woman world-class race car driver. In

open wheel and NASCAR she's done both and we have a lot of conversations. We go all over the place that we talk about. Aliens we talk about. It's not just about the racing. Yeah, aliens we get to what might else live amongst us. How's that for a tease? Yeah, get in there. Let's get right to it. All right, here's Danica. I'm not going back to university to be your friend. I'm going so I can get Uber One for students. It saves you on Uber and Uber Eats. I'm there for zero dollar delivery fee on cheeseburgers, up to five percent off smoothies, and five percent Uber cash back on rides. Just to be clear, I'm there for savings, not whatever you think university is for. Get Uber One for students, a membership to save on Uber and Uber Eats.

With deals this good, everyone wants to be a student. Join for just $4.99 a month. Savings may vary. Eligibility and member terms apply. Go back to school with Rogers and get Canada's fastest and most reliable internet. Perfect for streaming lectures all day or binging TV shows all night. Save up to $20 per month on Rogers Internet. Visit Rogers.com for details. We got you, Rogers. Oh, one of us got a blowout. I blow this out myself.

Holy shit. That's a cool room, boys. I have a whole team here, whatever that is. Yeah, where are you in Scottsdale? No, no, I'm in Colorado. It looks kind of Rocky Mountain high in that place. I had to get out of the heat because it's lava hot, it's horrible. It's horrible.

Do you bail on the summers there? Yeah, as much as I can. I was there for about three weeks and it was... I just hated my life. I felt like I was in prison because I couldn't go out past like 11. Then I have two dogs and they can't do it either, so... Their paws get fried on the summer. I don't like the heat. I played Vegas last July,

and it was 121. And I said, hey, do other people play this room? It was the Marauder in July. And they go, no, no. They don't play it. Nobody comes to Vegas in July. There was a four... Everyone canceled at the hotel, and the people there were fried and hungover. But anyway, back to our guest today.

No, let's go back to us. We know a lot about, he doesn't like heat. You have a cool room, cool hair, a cool necklace, and a cool t-shirt. Things are happening. Yeah. You know, Danica does a lot of things, Dana, and... I know, her Wikipedia page is like, it's like the, it's a monstrosity.

They go over every race, but it's incredible. I mean, what you achieved. Yeah. You were a race car driver. Do you remember that part? Vaguely. It does seem like a lifetime. Many lifetimes.

I feel like I've lived many lifetimes. I usually sort of classify the lifetimes in the realm of relationships, usually feels like my lifetimes, but racing was definitely one of them. Yeah, for sure. I think that, I think we all have that in a way. I can relate to that.

This quadrant, this is when we lived there. Now we're over here. And you know, it is, I think it's very, very human. But the race car thing, I mean, I don't know if there's any questions you haven't been asked about that part of your, you know. Yeah, we're here to ask the same ones. No, I thought of one, one other important.

Did I pee in my suit thing? I've never done that, so you can skip that one. You've never done that? You haven't peed it? I've peed in my car. I might've never done that, so you can skip that one. You've never done that? You haven't peed it? I've peed in my car. I might be doing something right now, but I'm not gonna say anything. I pee during podcasts.

You're natural. It's called pod pee. You must practice that. You're so natural. If it's a long podcast, you gotta go, you gotta go. That's all I'm saying. Yeah, it's called a trucker's buddy, and you put it in your pants, and then you...

Okay, here's my first question, but if you've been... What's a sport that's as dangerous as racing cars? What sport is as dangerous? Yeah, and I was just thinking out loud right before I clicked on, like I was thinking about you went into a sport, which takes a massive amount of athleticism and concentration. And I thought, you know, you get hurt in MMA or boxing, but... Balls.

Balls. Balls. Takes balls. And so how were you in that area? I mean, what do you... The balls? Well, they were... I just want your balls. So... I just met in the guts level of like, you know,

I'm gonna go faster around the next turn kind of thing. I actually thought, I really thought when I was young that I wasn't super brave when I, so I started go-karting when I was 10. When I was 16, I moved to England for racing. Dog disagrees. I know, she's very mouthy.

So at 16, I moved to England. I lived there for three years until I was 19. And then I came back. And when I first moved over to England, I thought to myself, maybe I'm just not tough enough, like brave enough. I don't feel like I'm very good on the fast corners. And then I came back to the States.

I started racing from the Atlantic and then IndyCar two years later. And turns out that that wasn't the case at all. And that you really, in racing, you have to get the car to feel really comfortable for you. And if the team doesn't do that, then it's very difficult to push. And so when I lived in England,

they didn't care at all about me. So the car felt terrible to me. So have you ever been in the middle of a race where you just, you're going all out and then you go, fuck, I wish I could move the seat up like two inches. You have no idea how much of a pain in the ass it was to fit me in a car because we had to, we had to usually put like something to raise my feet up

so that I could get closer to the top of the pedal so that I was putting my feet on the right spot. Again. Um, I think it's because it's, like, ironically hailing here in the middle of the summer. And it's, like, sunny, a couple of clouds, but it's truly hailing outside. I thought it was one of those things where you say to the dog,

if it doesn't, if it feels like it's not going well, start barking and then I'll say I have to leave. Yeah. That would be actually quite the skill set. It's like the dog and the car show is going to get a beer for them. If I could get the dog to like, get me out of jail free card in uncomfortable situations, that would be a major skill set. But anyway, so turns out I had the balls to do it.

So I was- You had the feet long enough and everything. Yeah, yeah, got the car fitted to me. So it was definitely, there were times where I was too high, too far forward, too far back, too far down. The whole time. Not the whole time, but usually at the beginning of the season, after you got fitted,

you figure that out very, very quickly in the first sort of time that you got in the car. And sometimes, like, I would be, like, working on the seat myself and, like, shaving it down and taking pieces out of it. And very, very manly of me. But, yeah, fitting in the... What was your height and weight in your prime race car driving? How small were you?

Uh, I probably, um, I'm 5'1". Never really grew past... I'm gonna guess that was gotta be like ninth grade. And, uh, I've been like around 110 pounds-ish my whole life. So, did you ever consider if the race car driving didn't turn out, you'd be a jockey? Did you ever think about being a jockey? Um...

Just kind of kidding, but you could have been a jockey. I mean, I have ridden a horse before. It was like once I got into NASCAR, so it was later. And I think, what are the speeds? There's like, loping is sort of like a speed with horses. And it's kind of scary. I'm not sure... I'm not sure I would have been okay with it, those horses, every time I see a horse

like running fast or going through water or just carrying someone fat on their back, I just think, I feel so bad for their legs. And then when they break them, they have to kill them. And I'm like, I don't know, I just, it doesn't make sense. Like, I'm not with those little legs and body. Good job, Dana, Bring up the sore subject. Um, but also, you know, Danica,

I don't know if you're part of this scam, I think I was promoting something, and we went to Darlington, maybe, and there was a guy that would drive idiots like me around to do a lap or something. Do you remember this guy's name? It was something funny. They probably got someone that was a driver or has been at some point in something.

By the way, Dana, when you're going around, whipping around the corner, and they want you to be scared shitless, they said, you don't have to be in it. Then when I got there, they go, no, get in with the guy. And I go, well, don't drive or anything. It's a scam every step along the way. Crawl in the window, put on this suit that,

the hardest part is, the scariest for me is because Danica and I are drivers. Dana, it's hard to explain, but I'll explain to you. I'm following, I'm riveted. Okay, so you get in and you go, put on this fireproof suit. There won't be a fire, but when there is, this will block some of it for a few seconds.

And I go, okay. And then they, I don't know if I'm claustrophobic. I did find out when they clipped me in with 18 clips. I go, let's just say we roll. How do we get the clips? And the guy's like, oh, I'll be long gone by then. I'm like, I know, but with me, when I'm in the car burning, there's so many clips, I lost track, I go, good luck. And then when he goes around, he's going,

I don't know how fast, 700, maybe I'm wrong. And, uh, and then he hits the wall. And I think Danica would know that... Is he in the car? Yeah, and that's... Fantastic. It's the Darlington Stripe. They do it on purpose to make you shit your pants.

It works. Um, he hits the wall. So when we get out of the car, the whole door is kind of ripped. And I'm like, why is the guy, first of all, that's not good enough to be out there with the real people, is the one with my life and is... This has, there's something wrong and... It was fun, in quotes.

Ha-ha-ha. Well, now you can say, like, I didn't pee my pants, but you can say you did shit-shores when you were driving. And I found out once I did it once, now I do it all the time. Uh, because it was fun and I liked it, and, um, which part am I talking about? The driving?

Yeah, which part are you talking about? There actually was a story about a driver that did shit his pants. It was at Waukesha, New York. Um, he was sick, and he absolutely sharted himself and he won the race. Ah, and he had to run around with it? And then he had to like go change

before going to Victory Lane. I don't want to put this image in your head, but there are Olympic marathon or world-class marathoners who have... and there's no hiding that. No. Yeah, that's harder to hide. Now we have a theme for this. Have you guys ever run for like long, long distance and known about this whole half the shit thing?

I was a distance runner as a younger person, but I never saw it up close if there was folklore about it. Usually you're healthier then, but when you get older, I could see things falling apart. But we just had a runner on, we should have asked him. Oh yeah, you should have, cause I ran the Boston marathon a few years ago. I don't know why, my one bucket list item

was to run a marathon. And so, well, I don't know what's wrong with me, but my friend today, I think I can get us into Boston. And I was like, yeah, cool. So she did. And I had to do a lot of training in Arizona where it was like, you know, I would go as soon as like barely sunrise.

What I didn't realize is I should have gone in the dark, but it'd be like a hundred and a hundred to 105 by the time I was finished. And there's something about the heat too, that really makes you want to go. Oh. That may make sense. I didn't though.

I didn't. So I never put that either. Danica, I don't want to brag, but when I used to walk from McCormick Ranch to my friend's pool on like Lincoln and 60th. Dana, this sounds like a brag. I would wear just raw dogged, just shorts, no sunscreen, no hat, three miles so I can go in the pool.

And that was in the summer when I was in high school. And that's all, just bragging. That was my Boston Marathon. Barefoot too? Not bare, not full raw dog. I had some Stan Smiths on. Actually, the story is partially a lie. Anyway, back to...

You're on a roll. Let's finish that story. I know. I was excited because I was like, look at... Because I grew up in Scottsdale baking and boiling, so I know Danica's story checks out. And my mom's there now and the dog... So she drives them around for a walk. For a walk, she puts them in the car and then she rolls the windows down and then she drives around and lets them bark.

She drives up to people and they bark at them and then she drives off. And if she sees, I don't know, that's my mom, but it's fun for her. She's, you know, it's fun. I did it once with her. I go, I want to go on one of these. And then she found where they had horses

and she pulled up and then they bark at the horses and it's fun. I did it once with her. I go, I want to go on one of these. And then she found where they had horses and she pulled up and then they bark at the horses and it's- Did you bark at them too? I sort of was the referee because then the horses would come to the fence. And then I said, okay, this is obviously just for fun. Everything's for fun here. Because the horses didn't get what was going on.

But overall it's fun in Arizona. Dana, you know. It's hot. Nine out of 12 months are fun. Yes, that's what you know, my buddy sells real estate there. And he says, I say, how do you just talk people to living there? Because everyone's fucking moving there. And he said, well, I say, in Chicago, there's three or four months, you can't go outside because of snow. It's just the opposite.

And I'm like, I guess that makes sense. I don't like it when it's freezing, but I grew up in Arizona, so I kind of can take it when it's hot. I mean, Dana, you know that I had, my steering wheel was steel. This is before I was rich, everybody. So I had a steering wheel that was steel,

and then I had oven mitts when I got in to grab it because they were so hot. And then they really came in handy when I pulled that pot roast out of the glove compartment. But that's not why we're here. I really wanna know what's going on with the rest of the car if the steering wheel was steel. Steering wheel was steel, Danica, you know,

because we're in the driving biz. Also, Danica, do you have road rage in Scottsdale? Do you get out? Do you carry anything? I, thank God there's so many lanes on the highway these days, because you can pretty much maneuver. I absolutely use the HOV at any point in time, no matter how many people are in the car or not.

Good job, good job. And I always think to myself, if I get pulled over, I mean, it's lapsed now, but I'd be willing to use an expired one. If I pulled out like my FIA racing license along with my film ID, how would that go? They would probably let you go. You've got a couple things going for you

and they might give you, but there's more crime going on out there. I don't... Like me, I'm like, I'm not the big fish guy. Like, let's... I know where you can focus some policing. So don't try to drag me in. But I'm easy. Yeah. Yeah, it seems like, it seems like, you know, 85 on the 101 is not really, you know, worth the time of day. They should probably... there's some other areas

that need help for sure. Yeah, that's, I've been on all of them. Also, we were gonna ask you, we had a guy in here. Do you ever heard of Stephen Greer? We're jumping around, but this guy was in real. I actually just got a text from Stephen Greer last night. Oh, you did? We had him on. You're kidding.

And he was really fun to talk to. Yeah, I've interviewed him a couple times. He's wild, man. The amount of like data in his head and names and... Oh, I know. I mean, it's like, it's really crazy. Yeah, I mean, for the audience that barely listens to our show,

Stephen Greer who was on here is a UFO-ologist. Is that what he said, Dana? Is that what he calls it? I think so, yeah. There's some term. And a doctor. Which means he's, yeah, he's a doctor. He's a very smart guy.

And Dana and I are sort of into this whole stuff. And so we asked him, you know, we didn't ask him, are they among us? That's what people wanted me to ask him, and I didn't. I think they are. But let's back up. Arizona, extraterrestrial. I have, every night I take my dogs out and look up into the sky, usually around 10 p.m.

and I think, I want to see something. And then I go, but maybe not, and I run inside. Exactly, exactly. If I actually saw something. But have you ever seen anything crazy? No, you know, I actually, you know, I believe in this stuff. And so when I was a kid in Casa Grande,

which is a day and an hour out of Scottsdale, is this coal, this copper mining town, I'll take you there sometime, maybe for your birthday. And I would sleep outside and I would try, I was reading this book called The Interrupted Journey. It was about people that got abducted. And then I'd look in the sky because it was so clear. And again, I was like, what if I, I would be,

and I kind of believe to this day, I would be so terrified if I saw something. Like that Las Vegas sighting and these people, they're weirded out the rest of their life because I see why people don't report all the time because then everybodyed out the rest of their life because I see why people don't report all the time because then everybody asks them the rest of their life and everything's so weird and the FBI comes and they're putting up cameras all over their street.

And I think that one was kind of real. There's a lot to that one. I don't know if you remember that one, Danica was. No, it's not the Miami one, the one where. No, that one is less videos, but fucking nuts. When it was in the mall. You've never seen so many cop cars.

Like, that was the most ironic, that was... I don't think that could have been an alien situation. I don't know what that was, but to have the most amount of cop cars that had like accumulated in one area that they'd like ever seen or that we've ever witnessed, seems a little crazy. But what's the one in Vegas? I mean, there's been so many.

Vegas is like, they said someone landed, a ship landed and they had a video of something going down like a falling star on some guy's body cam on a cop. And then these people said, there's guys in our backyard that are eight feet tall. Yeah. And they came over and then I looked at, look at the video, it's all over TikTok, of course. I went to the University of TikTok. And so I look and then I looked at the video, it's all over TikTok of course, I went to the University of TikTok.

And so I look and then they looked at where they're, they're not holograms, but they're like cloaked, it looks like. So it looks like they say they are there and these people like, we swear they're here and they're huge and then it's all scary. But that was kind of a big one. Depends on what you're into.

Is it like a drug area? Do they make a lot of meth in that area? No, I don't think, I think these people sounded real. And then of course, like one day, they just flipped their story. I didn't see anything. It's like a kidnap tape. Well, that's like the men in black sort of thing, right?

Like where they come and they'll tell you like, you better shut your mouth. I believe that stuff happens too. I mean, you know, I think there's. I believe that stuff happens too. I mean, you know, I think there's a lot of weird stuff that goes on. Yeah. Yeah. I also think that if there was sort of an interaction with an extraterrestrial, because there's, there's, there's some that are benevolent, actually, I think most probably are. And I think that Stephen Greer probably said that a lot, most of them are prevalent, that I actually think that there would be a positive,

I think you'd almost get like put in a trance. Almost as if, have you ever guys ever seen the movie Contact with Jodie Foster? Yeah. Oh yeah. Where she like sees her dad and her dad, but it's actually an extraterrestrial, but they took the form of the dad

to make her feel comfortable. Yeah. I think there'd be some scenario where they would never, you wouldn't feel uncomfortable. You'd be, you know, the frequency would put you at peace. You know? I don't know. I think that too.

But I'm still- From what I hear is that if you get closer, then you can hear what they're saying to you. They don't talk. Right? Have you heard that? Like in your head, you haven't heard that? No, like from a telepathy standpoint.

Yeah, yeah. They'll... I think even Stephen Greer, and I'm sure most of them are just, you know, fist bumps all around. You see an alien, it's like, hey, I'm on your turf. If they want to kill us, which I'm scared of, they could easily. It's, they would have done it already. So, I don't think there's that. But there's different...

There's all these different factions to it. Did Stephen Gribb, what did you two talk about? I mean, was you just casually having a conversation? No, I interviewed him twice for the show. He's a huge hit. Like, he's gets... He's one of the highest viewed shows that I've had for my podcast. And, I mean, we talk about, I mean, he goes on,

as you know, he goes on and on. Yeah, he doesn't need much prompting. There, no, it's so fast. No, one story leads to the next. Yeah. But of course we talk about like why, like the government, the coverups, like what kind of beings are they?

You know, how many are there? Yeah, all the ET, alien, all that kind of stuff does so well on my podcast, people love that. There's another girl. I think so. That you can talk to, her name's Elizabeth April. Everybody loves her too. She talks about some crazy shit.

She talks about some crazy shit. Sorry, give me the... We see reptilians like, you know, like a gem and Queen Elizabeth and, uh, like, um, uh, Bieber and people like that being reptilians. Like, shape-shifting reptilians. Shape-shifters. Is it something with the eyes?

Because I see videos of these, they look at these people's eyes. Yeah. So they are... Wait, let me ask this. Was MK Ultra a real thing in Hollywood? Oh, you're asking the two top reps of Hollywood? Yeah, why more than me? That's true.

David, you would know. ["I'm Not a Man"] To new friends. I don't find them that pleasant to be around. On September 13th, I guarantee you won't want to leave. Speak No Evil is filled with teeth clenching, seek clawing suspense. Something's not right with him. I've always wanted a family like yours. James McAvoy will scare you speechless.

No! You're gonna kill us. We're just sad to see you go. Speak no evil. Only in theaters September 13th. reset spending limit, redefine possible with Business Platinum. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Terms and conditions apply. Visit mx.ca slash Business Platinum. Tell me what MK Ultra is again, and then I'll tell you. Well, it's like MK Ultra is where they would,

they kind of like brainwash you into doing certain things or being certain way. Almost like you can be triggered with certain words or sounds too. Like you almost have a handler that's training you. And who are they that's doing that? Yeah, who are they? Are they aliens or government? Or are they just agents and managers? Deep state, yep.

No, I haven't traded my whole body and soul for just to be on a sitcom. I would probably raise the stakes a bit. I would want my house made of solid gold. I would actually barter for more. But I do think there's a lot of that talk out here and a lot of Illuminati talk and people ask me about it. It sort of has escaped me personally,

but Dana with his wooden doors and all his money... Unless they wiped out your memory. Oh, you're right. I don't know. Mind games. What about Danica, when you see people that, like they say Biden wears a mask or other people are a mask out there.

Where his ear doesn't like connect correctly. Yeah. Like where they say where he has like one where there's like a rounded earlobe and then the other one it connects. I've also heard bad plastic surgery. But, but I mean. I hope not my guy. Yeah, you should make sure you got the doctor.

You don't want those telltale signs. So, but if you look at his face over time, it's pretty unrecognizable. Right, could be age. You don't know, but sometimes they say say they have not just on Biden data, you see pictures of people where they have like a bump right here where it looks like there is a mask. Then there's a woman on the internet saying,

I used to, we'd make masks for the FBI or CIA, and they're so real, and that was from four years ago, they're like, there's so, you can't tell them apart. So I think Biden or any president might have a, not a stunt double, but someone that kind of runs around over here for him to distract, so you can't tell them apart. So I think Biden or any president might have a, not a stunt double, but someone that kind of runs around over here for him to distract, but definitely there's, it makes you think.

Well, then the Biden thing went, remember how, you know, we almost lost two presidents in a week, you know, recently? And how Biden went missing for like six days. And then when he re-emerged and shuffled his way to speak in front of everyone, that they were like, why is he so tall? He's like way taller than Jill's wife now. I saw that too. Like bad clone.

Yeah, like the clone people were like, guys, guys, it wasn't ready. He looks exactly like him, but he's 6'4". Yeah. Guys, come on. The clone department goes, fuck, we sent him out a day early. it wasn't ready. He looks exactly like him, but he's 6'4". Guys, come on. The clone department goes, fuck, we sent him out a day early. It was not ready.

I told you guys he was not. We had to hammer him down a little bit. Yeah, I don't know. I saw that. They said, he's taller than, you know, Zelensky. Whoever he was talking to. And I'm like, I don't know. But there is, it does make you think there's so much of that shit going on.

By the way, the fact of the matter is. Yeah, Biden, why are you taller? I did it better than any betters of people did. At the time, come on. Are you a clone? I'm a robot. My favorite clips and memes are the ones where he's absolutely speaking gibberish.

Yeah. It's fantastic. Well, I love where Hunter was the only one who can understand him. Hey, dad, how you doing? Yeah, I could have dinner tomorrow night, not tonight. Well, I have a date tonight. You don't need to know, dad. Yes, I've seen Fern Gully, Dad. I don't know. Maybe we were right.

People said, why are you doing Biden like that? Uh-oh, gaslighting. Oh, well. Well, that's okay. But I think he had it. I was actually like, I felt like that was actually verbatim, so. Yeah, that was an exact quote, Dana, you just did. Yeah.

No, it wasn't an exact quote. I'm working on new angles, because now. Yeah. No, it wasn't an exact quote. I'm working on new angles because now he's kind of, it's sort of interesting that perhaps, this is from the New York Times and stuff, he's not really talking to Nancy right now. He's a little upset with Nancy Pelosi and he clearly is a little, it's a little bittersweet for him. I was the greatest, most transformative president I kind of just ever had. This week, 400 million jobs, excuse me.

200 million, pardon me. So- Pardon me. But we have 15 million new Americans. Yeah. So it kind of grew our population, right? Brag about that. That's true.

But anyway, it seems like every week in America now something weird happens. First stop. So let's weird happens. First stop. So let's see what. First stop. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Beep beep.

First stop. Welcome aboard. Oh yeah. What's going on in this world today? I know, there's a lot happening. It's never boring, but I want to. I hope I get abducted. I kind of just hope I get abducted.

You know, the whole like, you know, I'm down here, come pick me up. I got to get out of here. That's it. Yeah. I go to Mars. Would you guys go to Mars? If you, like, would know, I'm down here, come pick me up, I gotta get out of here. That's- Yeah. I go to Mars, would you guys go to Mars if you, like would you go on a trip to Mars, no guarantees, but like, hey, there's stuff going down there.

I mean, they say there's even maybe even people are there, who knows? Would you go, would you go to Mars? I think at this point, yeah, I'm kind of, you know, I'm on the back nine. I think it'd be, yeah. If Elon Musk is driving, I like the SpaceX, the Boeing Starliner.

I don't know if I'd ride one of those right now. The ones that are stranded at the space station. Put me on that Apollo mission that went to the moon. That thing hit that with some armor all and get the cobwebs off it. Remember that little tin can? Did that make it to Mars? Do you think we went to the moon?

Do you guys think we went to the moon? I know someone who thinks we, in fact, did not go to the moon, he says. And I said, if they faked it, it's a bigger accomplishment than if they actually went. Yeah, when you can bluff everybody. That's a good point. I do like that. That is good.

But then why did Stanley Kubrick die mysteriously of a heart attack? Didn't know about Crestor, Lipitor, probably didn't check. And you know, a dose of, who knows, Tom Cruise was there. Let's get in the cold. She goes, why do you die mysteriously by getting hit by a car? Well, I mean, a heart attack, I guess, older guy,

but I know the timing is usually bad on those things. Like, the people that just died in that flight. The cancer doctor. Well, you gotta go into all this stuff. Oh, you have the eight guys that were like, the eight cancer doctors that were in the flight. Yeah, did Dana hear about that one, Dana? You got your ear to the tracks?

The Brazil crash? No, I was just thinking to believe in the Kubrick death, you have to have your eyes wide shut. That's just for film-ophiles. I like that one. I waited for that. But look, why are you two afraid of UFOs? Like I want aliens to come down.

I want to see it. If they start, if they come down and they come out and they're blasting me, that would just be fascinating. So there are aliens, now they're killing me. I don't know, why are you guys afraid? It'd be fascinating. Independence Day was bright.

Yeah, maybe they, because yeah, they say they have them in the, I think they're somewhere right now. I think we have some, I think we have ships. I think we steal the, I think we, go ahead. I think, you know, speaking of here, that girl, Elizabeth April, when I interviewed her, she said that there was,

basically the Anunnaki came to the planet to mine gold and the reptilians were here. Right. And that there was a sort of like the Galactic Federation said, okay, you guys need to leave. You all need to leave. This is the human's planet. And then the- Not so fast.

The Anakya said, no problem, pieced out. And the reptilians said, hell no, we're staying. And they said, okay, you can stay, but you can't be seen by the humans. So then they went inner earth and they use their mind to control people. And so they essentially still control the planet, but they're like inner earth and they're like amongst us. Are they Democrats or Republicans? Yeah. Well, clearly Democrats.

Survey says. Well, that one, it's just goes, it's really like the crypts in the bloods. This is the first incarnation. No, I would say, yes, the Anunnaki, is that the word you said? Anunnaki. Anunnaki said, we're leaving. Reptilian said, we're right behind you.

And then they go, you know what, we're just gonna hang. And I've heard that the underground Denver airport, there's so many underground bases that they ran into, And then they go, you know what, we're just gonna hang. And I've heard that the underground Denver airport, there's so many underground bases that they ran into aliens in there and then they didn't know what to do. They said, oh no, we went into where they were, probably your underground.

When they're excavating or something? Yeah, yeah. And then they, and a lot of, well, we're kind of jumping around. This got really crazy. But that was a good one. And they said, they had to talk to him and they said, because one of these UFO guys goes,

I was led down there, and he said, you don't want to go past those doors. It's a big production. You have to bring all these guys with machine guns because we don't want to disturb. And if we do, we don't know if they come out. And if they do, we're all toast because obviously they win in a fight, you know? Well, all you have to do is sort of take witness to some of the ancient civilizations,

like even just Egypt, like the pyramids, the temples. I've been there a couple of times and it's crazy. We just don't get it. Well, no one can explain how they built it, how man could build that, right? That's incredible. It's crazy. And even the temples too, while they're not, you know,

the great, you know, this huge structure with these giant megalithic stones or humongous stones that we can't even move with forklift now with our technology, The temples are stunning. Like they're completely covered in these, you know, pictures and we call them engravings or they're like etched into the walls and they're all perfect.

They're like so perfect, they must've been lasered somehow or something like that. Or maybe they were like a cast. And perfectly symmetrical and everything about them is like where they are on the planet. They're all aligned up to, or they use them as like, not Wi-Fi, but you know what I mean? Like their towers all connect and it's,

when you hear about it and all the, you know, launch to latitude, you're like, holy shit, like it's all perfect. Yeah. Crazy. Yeah, and actually each pyramid got a little worse than the one before, almost like technology came. I think it's sloppy.

And you know, they just, they discovered wine and it was over. Yeah, of course. Typical Anna knockers. That's it, 10,000 years ago. You can't look away with those guys, you gotta stay on them. All right, well, maybe we talk, okay, we talked a long time. We'll let you go Danica. That was very fun talking to you about this stuff. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie.

I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie.

I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie.

I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie wanna be one of these people, I'm fine.

I'm just cruising around, but I won't, yeah, I won't. No, and remember when you look at the night sky where I have it and you see all those stars, you go, really? Hmm, that's where you get an open mind to like, what the fuck are we doing here? How'd we get here? It's the endless quest, you know?

So if the spaceships come down, it'd probably be great. And we go, oh, aliens, you're down. Look at your spaceship. Do you know how the universe was created? Do you understand infinity? And they go, nope, we don't know, but we got great spaceships, David. Check it out.

Check it out. You guys know Danica, she's already on there. Hey-o. So Danica, I should say, you are an icon because of your athletic background. And then you've just gone on. You're an analyst for NBC and you have all your wine. And so I just think from a young age,

you're just very driven. You said, daddy, I want to ride your go-karts. And it just drive is passing. Magic Johnson has it. You said, daddy, I want to ride your go-karts. And it's just drive is passing. Magic Johnson has it, you have it, you know. A good book title is Driven, but it's probably been used. You ever said to a boyfriend? My first book was called Crossing the Line. And then my second book was called Pretty Intense.

Ooh. Driven's good, Driven's good. I mean, yeah, it was called pretty intense. Ooh. But driven's good, driven's good. I mean, yeah, it was, I realized and I don't know why it took so long. I think it's cause I just did one thing for like most of my life, but I really do everything fast. Kind of ridiculous. I think fast, I walk fast, I cook fast, I drive fast.

And just throwing yourself into stuff. I'll do that, I'll do that. Let's do this, let's do that. And not minding the pain that usually comes with it or frustrations. So what is your ultimate, I know you've had your dating life out there and stuff, but what kind of man do you think works with you?

I'm just literally curious as a person. Someone who's equally driven or someone who can lay back and coexist. A stoner, a gamer. Because I've been married for 41 years. I could tell you my son. I could have had a hair. It's very important. That hair is on fuego, babe.

Look at that. It won't look like this again, Danica. Don't count on it. It's got a mind of its own. You know, it's a good question. I think about this a lot. I... Well, I'm thinking out loud to myself, okay, someone with that kind of drive, you know?

I think it's good to have someone to... I do love laughing for sure. I've learned the value of that. That is very important. Someone that can bring the chill out in me a little bit. Yeah, I think that's a good thing. But someone else that can take charge because there's no way to like really get into my feminine or a female or a feminine energy.

God, get the words right. I don't wanna make anyone mad. But to get in your feminine, you have to have someone else take charge. Otherwise it's really hard. And it's so easy for me to, like, do everything and plan everything and be in charge. See? So, but to get all, like, sweet and flowy and girly,

I need someone that can arrange things, organize things, do things, take charge, take, you know, take some... Take some stuff off his plate. Who wrote this song, Are You Strong Enough to Be My Man? Cheryl Crowe. Cheryl Crowe. Have you ever ordered for a boyfriend,

he'll have the chicken, you know, that kind of thing. Yeah. No, thank God. Dana orders for me all the time. That's cute. Yeah, it's super cute. What does it feel like when we go to dinner? What does it say about each of you?

We'll tell you off. I don't know. I would just say, well, there's different ways of being the male figure and different ways of being the feminine figure. They can take different forms in a long-term relationship. I think you gotta have sense of humor, lot of respect. And sometimes, you know,

I mean, Chris Rock's special, I said, a tambourine that someone has to play the tambourine, that was his point of view. Yeah. You know, take a back seat so the other can shine and stuff like that, or you can share it. I know, this is like talking about aliens. It's very hard.

It's true, because of a multi-decade relationship. For every reptilian, there's an Anahuacu. Exactly. Yeah, so you find your opposites attract. Exactly. Well, Danic. But I think that, you know, I'm a little high maintenance.

I require a lot of attention. So if someone's gonna keep me stimulated, I need a lot of attention. So if someone's gonna keep me stimulated, I need a lot of attention. Yeah. And is that someone who would be curious about you on a daily basis? Like you're interested in what happened to you and what's going on with you?

I think that's a healthy thing. Yeah, I wanna know how my day was, what am I doing, what did I eat for dinner? Very nice again. Thank you, Danica, for coming on. And good job with the use of megalithic. Is that what you said? Yeah.

Yeah, good job. Thank you. I love big words. I try to make people feel dumb when I say them. You did, and you didn't have to change it and dumb it down. You did good with the first one. And Dana and I are going gonna stay on for a half hour and talk about you, but thanks for-

We're gonna stay on. Steven Greer is our next guest. Yeah, Steven was great. So tell him hello and we'll see you next time. I appreciate it. Well, this was fun, guys. Thanks for coming. Enjoyed it.

Thank you. Okay, bye, hon. This has been a presentation of Odyssey Superfly as executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade, Shanna Weiss-Furman of Odyssey, Heather Santoro and Greg Holtzman. Hope you liked it!