Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade - SUPERFLY #41 - Jim Gaffigan JOINS!

Episode Date: November 8, 2024

The guys riff on the election, the Jason Kelce phone incident, and Peanut the Squirrel before being joined by Jim Gaffigan! Get your first month for a dollar at https://www.getkikoff.com/ superfly today. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

David, you know about Airbnb, right? I've had relatives that are coming to stay and they're staying for a little while and the hotel is far away or it's not quite the right fit. And so they get an Airbnb and these things are just a great use of digital knowledge. Oh yeah, I think people are just all moving that way because just easy, you do it on your phone,

you check it out and you find if you want your own privacy or whatever. Yeah. Or if you want a pool, you find one with a pool, you know, or one that you can bring your dog. It's it's completely not one size fits all super adjustable. I've used one in particular a couple of times and it was just charming and nice and very easy to use. So it's a good alternative

if you need a place to stay. Right, because hotels are great. It just sometimes, sometimes hotels don't spend as much meticulously checking everything out. Airbnb, I think they always seem to have personal touches and my friends say it's great and they would never Yeah, and if you want to, If you want a kitchen, you know, at the hotels it doesn't have a kitchen, a full kitchen usually can get that and do all that. Perfect accommodation, traveling with friends, your family, you're on your own.

Listen, for your next adventure, it might be something to try out at least, you know? You won't regret making the switch from traditional hotels and you might wind up liking it. Red One, we're coming at least, you know? He won't regret making the switch from traditional hotels. And you might wind up liking it. Red One. We're coming at you. Is the movie event of the holiday season. Santa Claus has been kidnapped.

You're going to help us find him. You can't trust this guy. He's on the list. He's a naughty lister. Naughty lister? Dwayne Johnson. We got snowmen! Chris Evans. It might just go back to the car.

Let's save Christmas. I'm not going to say that. Say it. All right. Let's save Christmas. There it is. Only in theaters November 15th. And your hand could shake. You don't know. You're just like, yeah, it's almost too much. And especially if you've never, I mean, she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal.

I think Maya was- I mean, let's be honest. You know, I think she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal. I mean, I think she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal. I mean, I think she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal. I mean, I think she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal. I mean, I think she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal. I mean, I think she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal.

I mean, I think she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal. I mean, I think she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal. I mean, I think she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal. I mean, I think she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal. I mean, I think she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal. I mean, I think she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal. I mean, I think she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal. I mean, I think she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal. I mean, I think're just like, yeah, it's almost too much. And especially if you've never, I mean, she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal. I think Maya- Let's be honest, you guys.

What's more difficult, being on SNL or being president? You know what I mean? It's SNL. It's just different. Absolutely. Okay, I wanna start because you can tell me what I do and I'll tell you what you do. Okay.

I see you do this sometimes like when you're thinking or sometimes- God, I touch my face all the time. Sometimes like this, the pinky- Really? The pinky in the ear? I think, unless I made it- Oh, that's nuts. Unless I made it up.

No, but you observe people. I kind of observe voices and stuff on people which I didn't do before SNL because you sort of had to, you start to pay attention. But something you do is this, a lean back. Yeah, and that is a little bit just kind of stretching my back because I'm kind of in a high chair. But yeah, it's probably- It's also psychotic.

A stress release like, oh, let's not try too hard. Why don't we listen to the guests? Why do we have to overlap? I do. I go like this after I interrupt everyone. I go, I got to reload to get my energy to interrupt again. I listened to other podcasts sometimes and boy do they, we are not the kings of talking over our guests. I'll just put it that way. Interrupt us. Yeah. Interrupt us momentariness. Well, my head is sorry.

Listen, so my hair is all super helmet because why? You might be doing this today too. Dana, as you know, Dana's in New York. They're doing an SNL photo today. And it's in LA? It's, I've heard a little birdie. I think it's because there's too many sections,

so New York and LA. And then they're gonna try to make a cover where they jam us all on that. Yeah. It's not Vanity Fair. So I'm not I'm not going to give them my total Blue Steel looks, but it is a magazine. Yeah. I mean, it's a penny saver. You're depending on where you are in the frame. Your head would maybe be the size of a dime, but probably smaller than a smaller than a dime,

a half a dime. So I'm not gonna, you know, and you're supposed to dress like how you are, right? Would you explain what we're talking about? We're supposed to do a photo for the 50th anniversary with people that were involved in the show, but there's so many people, I don't know if it'll be a full cattle call like at Dodger Stadium or it's going to be. Isn't it for New Yorker magazine? Sorry,

New Yorker magazine. Or New York magazine. I don't know. Oh, that's it. New York magazine. Sorry. And who is the one we know we famously had the fight with back in the old days? We wanted to beat the guy up. Is that New York Observer or was it New York Magazine? Probably. Do you remember that? I, yeah, Atlantic or I don't know what they were. But they, they wrote, they came and stayed with us for a week and we buddied up with the guy. And then he wrote a horrible.

Oh, that's right. Yeah. And just shit all over. It was Adam and Farley and everyone was like, let's go down there, let's beat the fuck out of this. It was total disaster. Lauren, no, if so, I'm looking the other way. I have a new impression you just made me think of. Lauren Michaels as a bullfrog in a pond. No. No.

No. By the way, and guess what? Can I ask you a question? No. No. No. No. No. By the way, and guess what? Can I ask you a question? No. They... Too many. No. Go ahead.

We actually in our pond up on our farm, once had a male bullfrog sitting there in the middle of the night on the rocks and just cattle call, no a frog call to all the female frogs. Roar! It's just super loud for like two hours. Just trying to get some puss in the middle of the night. But look, but the New York magazine thing, yeah.

Open for biz. Open for biz. I like, yeah. Everyone listening is like, you know, that's funny. That doesn't happen on my pond. We trapped a raccoon the other day in a cage. He's got a coon. And that, whoops. And then of course, you go to Harrison's Hardware, you get big intense gloves and you're kind of wrestling with a squirrely raccoon while you were cruising down going to Koi to get some sushi. And you don't got to wrestle it. I like it when it's already killed.

Yeah, you're cruising high in your Land Cruiser, looking around, pulling up to the valet, walking in like some kind of stud superstar and ordering calamari. I go, give me that octopi. And half the time when you get the sushi, you go, I don't like the octopi. You always see a little, and you go, you know,

a good doctor could bring this back to life. Yeah, that's that notion. That's the gross part. It brings you to the table and still alive. And then somewhere it, yeah. I don't like that. I don't like it. I don't like it medium well.

I don't like it rare. I don't want it medium well. I don't like it rare. I don't want a hamburger. I don't know if I like this look today, but go ahead. Well, I'll come around to this New York magazine asked me in the email, would you like a groomer? We have hair people and also would you like a personal groomer that we can fly in? What? Yeah, groomer. Now a groomer that we can fly in. What?

Yeah, groomer. Now a groomer- Spoiled. You have makeup, you have hair. This is sorry, inside, if you're going to talk show. But a groomer is like an overarching person that tells you how to groom yourself up. I said, I don't, you know.

Heather, what about that? Is that a groomer? Or is it a, do you have a stylist Dana? It's the overarching name of it. Yeah. My whole goal is bedhead next day hair. So I don't really need people quaffing my hair. You know, when you go on a movie and by the time you get in front of the camera, it doesn't look anything like you. You go, mine is bed head hair. I don't care. That's my, that's really my look most days.

Today they just went mew, shellac. I think it looks very tidy, very early. Steve McQueen, you know, you look a little biker. I'm probably, I'm older than Steve McQueen. When did he, I delicately say croak. 48 or 50, he went to the stars. God dang, really? Yeah.

I had a weird SNL thing. The sketch got cut and I feel bad about it. We had Kamala. The show was loaded. Kamala was the, I say it wrong. Kamala was in the 28 minute cold opening. Yes. And it was... So were you.

What I wanted to say because this election happened and a lot of people are upset, which is normal. And it was pretty much decided by 2 a.m., I guess, because I went to bed and I was like asleep, 12 or something, my time in New York. And then I woke up and it was like I checked and it says Trump wins. And here's my takeaway from the coverage last night. Did you watch any of it? Maybe you didn't. I did watch some. Yeah. They have these guys and I know they've done this for several cycles now, but it seems more sophisticated.

The guy's up with the map, and he's like a wizard moving things around. And here you see, in Calico County, here Joe Biden carried 28,000, and Kamala Harris. The Metro, it was like just this massive intensity. Yes, there's so much going on. Yeah, more than ever. Like little circles.

Little circles. Little counties, these counties, this is how they voted, this is how they will vote, this is what we think they'll vote. Very complex. We're gonna talk, you know, when we have Gaffigan on in a little bit, he was taped right before the election,

just so we are clear. We are talking right after. And election night, he was taped before election night. Yeah. That day. So he, if we don't mention that. He didn't see the magic man and see these big blue circles. That means a lot of young college voters could be coming in late over here,

but these little red dots, these are rural voters. These are really, really stupid people and they live way out. I don't know what they said. Yeah, these are rural voters. These are really, really stupid people and they live way out. I don't know. I think it's that. Yeah, it's so true. They kept it pretty neutral. I think both of them seem very scientific.

CNN. These hayseeds out here. Yeah, I'd flip back and forth because I sort of want to get a real gauge. Some talk one way. It's funny because sometimes they don't count, they don't count anything officially as far as a state for a while.

I kind of like if they wait because there's too many they can flip. It's too close. They'll say like 10 things in a row that looks like the state's gonna be won by Kamala or Trump ago. But what I said means nothing. Anything could change.

Don't listen to me. Let's just give it away. But these counties are not going. And then they put Biden versus Trump 2020. And here you see the metrics here. He's up one and a half percent over this time last time. I mean, it was amazing. I was exhausted. It's really hard on me. I do look forward to the, it's hard on you, the political ads going away. the political ads going away. Did you choke up? Political, no, I turned into RFK. Political ads going away.

It's like someone who's really sad for a second, so I'm just really upset about the political ads going away. I almost started crying. No, I choked on something, but yeah, the political ads, the local ones. Oh yeah, Prop 47. Bill Squankmeyer killed someone.

Oh, you act like you didn't know that? You know, we vote for him if you want to die. Proposition 119, to help the children. Don't you wanna help the children? Mary Wang doesn't want you to know she beats her babies. She has 11 babies and beats the shit out of them. You didn't hear it from us. Mary Wang really doesn't know a lot about this hat. Bill Campbell likes to climb mountains and throw rocks on nursery school kids. Do you want to stop Bill Campbell? Prop 111, because stop throwing dirt on our children. Kid going like this.

He built a roller coaster that exploded at the state fair. Then he laughed. He showed him, Is that who you want? Or you want that guy? Oh, okay. He strangled a crosswalk guard and then walked away. Isn't it time we put them behind bars? Proposition 1348, because it's time.

Do you remember when Jim Jenkins put a nun in a sleeper hold? We do. Here's a clip. Vote for him if you want. I don't know about you. I don't want to go into a guillotine hold. Do you remember when Kathy Wood flying, slapped her pet duck in the face? On purpose? This ad is against duck slapping paid for the committee to duck slapping.

This ad was paid for by the duck. Tired of seeing rabbits bullied. This ad is paid for the Don Rapids Roller the bullet. Now they can just do it super fast. Okay, go ahead. I have to show you a picture just because we're on this subject, which we're not. This is a mystery picture I just got because, you know, Lowe Joe, Lori Joe, who's been working with Norm forever, she's going through his stuff. She just sent me a picture.

It's kind of a tearjerker, just funny because I have no idea what this is from. Here's a funny picture. I go, Lori Jo, I don't remember this, but Norm really fell apart at the end. Is that Norm? No, I said, this is a, rubbing face, this is, I don't know what, I'm by Trellis, is that what it's called, Heather?

What's that background? All I'm saying, when I look at this because of the stories I've heard, when a chimp goes full chimp, you are in danger in that picture, sir. If that chimp decides to turn and eat your face in one second, there's not a thing you could do or it was ever off camera.

So you gotta be careful. He says, I have the strength of a much bigger chimp than I am. By the way, he has pants on, so he's sort of domesticated, but I'm holding this and she said, there's another picture of Norm holding another chimp. I'm like, where are we? Maybe this is when we went to the zoo and taught animals how to do standup. I don And sketches. I've been around chimps, but I don't remember holding one like that for a photo. I'm holding it wrong, but I don't even know how I'm, where's my arm?

I don't know what's going on. Do you have friends who- Look at how terrified I am. Who dress up indigenous chimpanzees into clown clothes and then hold them for photos? Pay for the people who want to keep chimps dignity. I don't know about you, but if I'm a chimp, I don't want to look like a jackass

paid for by chimps that don't want to look like jackasses. Yeah, okay, that was a good one. It wasn't bad. You made a chimp look like a jackass. I don't know what the third is there. There's gotta be a third, you know, jackass. Also, there's a big hubbub if we're going into stories about, it's sort of political.

There's a lot of stories. The squirrel. This is a tough story for Heather here. This is a tough story for anyone here. The squirrel was euthanized because, oh yeah, New York's decision to seize is rough too. That reminds me, I gotta get a power crunch. So did New York decide to get one specific squirrel?

Why? Do you know this story? It said- I've only heard about Peanut the Squirrel, but I didn't know they're euthanizing him in New York when there's 10 million squirrels. Why this squirrel? By the way, you kill an animal, that's the front page.

People will flip out. So understandably, there was a squirrel, they called in that it bit someone, Heather, or might have bitten someone. Oh, turned rabid or something? So they say, oh, in fear of rabies, but, and then they got there. First question they asked,

do you have any cameras in the house? Why? I'm getting to the juicy part. They also found a raccoon, took that, euthanized that. They said in case people have rabies and it's like crazy. So now, I think I got that right. But now the guy says, they asked if we have cameras because the neighbor was mad they do OnlyFans.

So they were looking for a reason to bother them and they didn't like that. I don't know. I'm sort of making this up. But they were, they think that was the reason they wanted, they didn't like them because they're doing OnlyFans, like a couple or something. Like I have not one fact, not nothing, nothing. It's a fascinating. But I will say, I know it really petered off at the end, but, uh, and then I thought is the guy getting attention for the only fans, even though the squirrel is a national story. Intention.

You need attention to trend on OnlyFans or everything. We just don't do crazy stuff. We would never hurt an animal to get ratings on our podcast, Newsflash. Secondarily, who decided to call killing an animal euthanizing an animal? Bill Euthanize? Bill Euthanize invented the word euthanize.

So people are murdered. But that sounds pretty good. He wasn't killed, he was euthanized. So people are murdered. I don't know about you, but that sounds pretty good. He wasn't killed, he was euthanized. Hey, for people to want to stop being euthanized. Did the squirrel really bite anyone? People want to just go back to the word killed. Okay, let's go to the stories then, because should we or what do you want to talk about? Should we or what do you want to talk about?

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Terms and conditions may apply. Offer subject to change. Individual results may vary. I'm Jenna Fisher. And I'm Angela Kinsey. And together we have the podcast Office Ladies. may vary. rewatch episodes every Monday with new bonus tidbits before every episode. So follow and listen to Office Ladies on the free Odyssey app and wherever you get your podcasts. Tis the season for shopping and with Rakuten, it's also the season for stacking up the savings.

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Jason Kelsey it is picture this idea. It's for the 40 plus crowd. So I have scraggly brown hair about down to here and I have like a striped shirt on and a Coke spoon around my neck. And I go as peppermint chatty. Hey man, what's going on? How's your Halloween going?

I'm gonna start working out. You know who peppermint Patty is, right? Yeah, yeah. Peppermint Patty is, right? Yeah, Peppermint Patty. And okay, I see it now. We have a picture of this? No, I'm saying I don't wanna go next year as Peppermint Chatty.

Oh, I see. Oh, there it is. Now- He looks young. Yeah, no, this is Trump during his speech to claim victory in the presidential thing. I mean, he just was really rested. He finally took a really long nap. I took a long nap, and I couldn't believe it,

and here I am. But I guess that's actually Trump. Someone sent this to me. I guess it's Trump as a little kid. Or is it a kid who looks like Trump or is it Photoshopped? Or is it AI or is it none of the above? Let's go to the phones. You know, mom, what I could use right now. I know it's two. Yeah, it's definitely has to be. You're right. It's a comb over and the kid is one,

you know, I'm doing terrific and I could use some milk and you know how I like it. I like it the regular way. So let's get busy, mom. You know how I do these things. And you look at it and you see. Yeah, you know how I do these things. Also, what are, oh, he said in his speech, he goes, and I'm not gonna rest. I'm like, I think you need to rest a little

because he's older and he's been campaigning for straight for a month. He's got a little mini doc of when he said, I'm going to run for president 2022. And he was almost, you could hear the crew of Stifling laughs like, oh, come on, man, you're so over. I don't put us through this. It is the most you got. I mean, you just can't, he's like radioactive.

You couldn't kill him if you tried. It's unbelievable. Whoop-dee-whoop-dees. All right. You have a picture if you tried. He's like unbelievable. Whoop-de-whoopies. All right, you have a picture of, let's go back to Jason Kelsey. Yeah, we can trend on this one. Well, these guys are, of course, our buddies.

Jason was on the show. So it's a very serious picture of him. Is that his new headshot? I don't mind it. So he's wearing that Madonna microphone. So he goes to a game. Of course I know nothing. He goes to football college game.

He's leaving. You know, when you leave, people come up and talk to you, but also to get clout, some people start trouble, of course, because getting in a situation with a celebrity is way better because you're going to wind up minimal on TMZ. So for good or bad, just want to get attention. So he used a slur referring to his brother.

And I would say this from observing and having Jason on the Kelsey brothers. Like if it was, if it was right on Jason, I don't think he would have gotten tweaked by it. But when you attack my brother, the Kelseys go full Kelsey at that point. And in this case, the guy is, compared to a regular human being, he's exceptionally strong. Like you would not want him to punch you.

So it's an act of kindness to take his phone and smash it as opposed to the young man's head. Sure, and you know, I think I saw the story and then Jason fought back and it sort of went badly for everybody involved, it's fine. But I get mad like that too, and I think there's not enough attention on the guy that did it.

Like how uncool that was. They're just more me saying, Jason, are you sure you apologize? Should we accept this? But go look at the instigator of everything. Who's, I don't know, he got his phone broken. Who cares? He said something foul and out of the blue to fuck with him to get a reaction. But you saw him walking until he said, my brother. So it's, it's kind of a thing. He ain't heavy. He's my brother. So don't mess with my

brothers. What I'm getting from them. And also if you're going to yell something out of Kelsey and you yell at the other brother, you go to Travis and you say something about, uh, uh, his, his brother, you're going to get similar situation. You're going to get something, but the cell phone was an act of kindness rather than a right cross or a face. Cause you know, when you're 270 pounds, you can really hurt people. You know, I have that problem.

And the thing is, people are on the street sometimes and they'll yell, David Spade and whatever pejorative. And you know, I go nuclear, I'm scrappy. I go low, then I go high. I'll take three to get in. They say Dana and I say yes, and they go, oh, are you Dana?

And then it gets confusing and then I take their phone, I try to lift it and then I throw it. One guy said to me, whatever happened to David Spade? And I slapped his face really hard, but nothing bitch. And that was our manager, Mark Gurvitz. I was kidding. I just want to add one simple question. Why doesn't Spade like money?

Why won't he get in the rocket ship and fly for 12 hours in a snowstorm? Stan likes money. But Bentley, you don't. Rob Lowe likes money. I think Mark would like this. We have to make, we each have them, little puppets of like a little frog or something.

They go like this. It kind of looks like our manager. Yeah, you family don't like money because it is like a puppet show at this point. You go, Mark, I'm flying around the globe three times. I got a globe in my office, doesn't look that big. Yeah. Trust me.

It's naked. I like, trust me. Trust me. You're going to like it when you get the check. But. I go, I thought it was going to be more money. The landscape has changed. That's a good one. It's not good out there right now.

Everybody's getting hurt. I go, really? Smartless is getting hurt? Not them. Everybody's taking a haircut. Trust me. They're not making what you think. I go, I think they're doing fine.

Everybody's getting a haircut. That's a good one too. Everybody's getting a haircut. Everybody's taking less. Trust me, they're not making what you think. I go, I think they're doing fine. Everybody's getting a haircut. That's a good one too. Everybody's getting a haircut. Everybody's taking less. Everybody's taking less. All right, next story, even though Mark's the funniest one.

Who's the funniest? Oh yeah, how long have we done? Okay, another Kelsey story. Okay, oh, this is another Kelsey story. This is, they made, I think Heather knew, did you know this? They made a Hallmark movie, but based on Taylor and Travis. Oh, okay. Some third party, not them.

Okay. Let's look at the pic. I don't think they're part of it. Yeah. I see. Oh no, they make them look like an idiot right away. I'm Drew. Why would a great looking football player have a chance? He's the best receiver in the world.

Get his number. It's her! It's her! I want to see you again. It's a regular movie. Oh, boy. Like, regular people, huh? Don't screw this up. I promise not to follow him up with this.

Oh, of course. There's an imaginary little sister. The more I'm with you, the more I really like you. I just can't believe they got a documentary crew to follow them around like this. It's so spot on. I know we're trying to keep this a secret. Late Squamblombler.

In a Flum-nee production. Is this the whole fucking movie? My God, look at how much. She looks like Taylor Swift on stage. Yeah. Oh boy. I'll tell you what, they would never make this with just comedians like us and a pop star. You know, he's funny, get his number.

Yeah. He tackled her down and married her. But I'm sure in this movie, they get married. What do you think? Yes, cause they want ratings and they want money. They like money. See, people on homework like money. Let's ask Heather. Heather, what do you think of having a boyfriend who's like six, eight, two, six, sixty as your boyfriend? And he can pick you up, throw you over his shoulder,

swing you around, throw you in a stroller. I mean, is there... Are you asking, is it good that he's a football player or that he's huge or that he's rich and great looking? Or that he can, like he just carries her out on stage like a little baby and she's like five days, and she's not, you know, and he says, don't drop the baby, which is kind of sweet, you know,

Taylor Swift. Go ahead. So Heather, weigh in on the size of the man I'm not talking about. Something where ladies like to always feel a little bit smaller than their guy. Can you hear that? Ladies like to feel a little smaller than the guy. But the point is, it's consensual.

Oh, she says, is it consensual? We don't know. It's probably around. I think it's consensual between Taylor Swift and Travis Scott. What if it wasn't in this Hallmark movie? That's where they kind of go wrong. Yeah, he just turns. It's time for me to score a touchdown.

What? Now she's a hostage in his basement. Where's the pop star? He's like, I don't know. Your shoes with you. No, and then the cops are like, doof, doof. He opens the trap door and looks down. You'll get fed tonight.

Yeah, exactly. No football player. If they spun it like that, I'd probably watch most of it. Little silence of the lambs in there. Keep it exciting. I wish them all the best. They have to be, if you take Trump as a metric, as a metric of resiliency, no matter what's thrown at him, he just keeps coming. The world attention on this couple, just think of them as, it's Taylor and Travis, they're just dating, you know.

They can withstand this and go with it and not go crazy. It's good on them. Yeah, to make cameras, gotta get away. Listen, when people know you're dating and everyone comments, it's already hard. And then add that times a thousand. Well, it's a Hollywood story. So it's the handsome football star, world-class Super Bowl winner,

just what women like and a man he is. And then she's supernaturally talented and beautiful. It's like kind of a fairy tale. We're all pins and needles. I talked to Chappell Rhone about it at the show. She's a huge fan of our podcast. Where is she? Get her out.

Why don't you lean in? This is where she's supposed to lean in. I just made that up. Hi, Dana. In case she's listening. Did you talk to her? Do you go up and go, hey, do you act like Biden the whole time

when you talk to people? Well, yeah, I mean, we talked with- Well, yeah, I do. Yeah, I mean, they wanna hear the Biden. I ran into some nice people, had some nice things to say at the party. I don't want to name drop Jon Stewart, but it doesn't matter who was there.

But people, you know, Biden's a new character that's about to leave the stage. But I think he should walk around the White House with a T-shirt that says 81 on it. What's that mean? Because in 2020, he got 81 million votes in Sweden. Kamala got 66 million. So she should just have a t-shirt.

It's 81, what does it mean? I should say 81M and then under it. You like that? How about just 81 million? Why are we hiding and pretending? Yeah, you gotta help people a little bit. Yeah, 81 million. I would've wanted it.

I would've beat him like a drum. I would've wanted it. People know I would've. This is a cake walk. Come on, I'm being serious. I would've beat him like a drum. I did it before. You can do that this week on the show.

You should be in your room with a cigarette going, you know what? People can do the one index finger tap with the ashes because he'd think mostly and it's kind of like that or something. I guess somebody doesn't want to win. But you know, it's just, it's everything's a human story. I don't know how it feels to lose the presidency. Trump knows how.

He got a little angry about it. He knows how to win though. He's had that twice, you know, so. Looks good on the res. Hopefully tomorrow he won't say it. I just changed it, I talked to the Supreme Court and I could do three terms starting now. I'm going to 90, I know how to be 90

and I'm going right there. All right, one more story and then we gotta go because we got a good guest. We got a, we have a really good guest gotta go because we got a good guest. We got a, we have a really good guest today. We got a really good guest. Here we go. Okay. Let's see.

Okay, this is just a goofy one. So this guy is gonna try to walk this hula hoop. Big shoulders, trying to get through a hula hoop. Ain't no way, bruh. Ain't no way big shoulders didn't get hula hoop. Okay, you can turn the volume no way Big Show can get me. Okay, you can turn the volume down. Okay, here he goes.

He's a big guy. He's crossed himself. He puts his sweaty... Sweat napkin in his hat. Ain't you doing it blindfolded? Aw, bruh. He's creeping up on it. Oh! Okay. That's pretty good, right? It wasn't even hard. He's creeping up on it. Oh, okay.

That's pretty good, right? It wasn't even hard. It wasn't even close. What's this guy say? He's blown away. He said, nah bro. He's perplexed as we are. This is the highlights of the world's Instagrams.

That's out there. That's a good harmless one. No, it didn't look like he could fit through. And then he went back and he went through fast and he leaned down a certain way. It's kind of like when you're moving a refrigerator, a couch through a door frame. And some reason, you know, you have to lift it up

and it creates more vertical space or, you know, just something I'm talking about. I saw you do this once when we were going to dinner and someone had a hula hoop and you had your pile of money you carry and you go, do you think it could fit in there? And everyone's like, no. And then you like squished it.

You go, look, and then a lot fell out. I know, I know. Well, that's when you got me that Dr. Seuss cap for Christmas and Paula said, what are you gonna do with it? I go stuff cash in it and go to a restaurant with David. But it's- Scrooge McDuck.

It's a big Dr. Seuss thing and I put lots of 20s in there. It's just money. Yeah. And then- All right, well let's get Jim out here because we're- We can always- We have editing capability. Jim-

Coming up next, our buddy, but you get to work with him lately. I worked with him for the last five shows on Saturday Night Live. He came in, had never been in 8H, never done sketch comedies. We'll talk all about that and how we found his governor, Walsh.

And you know, his character lost the election, but he didn't lose the election because that guy is a winner as a sketch player and a comedian and a hell of a nice human being. New Hulu comedy coming out on November 22nd. We'll talk about that. Here he is, Jim Gaff again. Let's talk, I have a different shirt on.

["The Hulu Movie"] What does possible sound like for your business? It's the ability to reach further with access to over 1400 lounges worldwide. Redefine possible with Business Platinum. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Terms and conditions apply. Visit amex.ca slash Business Platinum. Hey, you're bad mouthing me. No, no, no. Hey, you're bad mouthing me.

Oh, no, no, Joe saying you're better friends than me and him are already. What's going on? You know, Dana has been like my support animal. Yeah, I've got a few laps under my belt, but I do say this and I've said it before. And it became a catchphrase as Hans and Franz. Whoops. It looks like the student has become the teacher. I used to say that to the junior varsity sometimes. Chris Rock or you or Sandler,

the student has become the teacher. Jim is a quick learner, but the first week, he texted me, let's just set the scene." This is Jim Gaffigan, he has 11 specials, he's world famous, he's incredibly successful. Great standup, great writer. So anyway, after, now that's out of the way. Now, he came in green going,

hell, I don't know nothing about no sketch coming. What we doing here? I ain't never done nothing like that. Yeah. Yeah. What's this microphone? Yeah. Why do they call it a script?

Is it live? No, now you do you. Oh, yeah. I didn't know what to do. I met that Lauren Michaels I thought was going to be a woman. Hey, yeah. I didn't know what to do. I met that Lauren Michaels I thought was gonna be a woman. You know? I thought, all I know is Lauren Green. Hmm.

He came up to me and you said, I remember I quoted like, well, Mr. Danagarni, what should we do next? What's going on? This here's a big building. Barney, what should we do next? What? No, no. This here's a big building. It sure is crazy. It was so bizarre. Yeah. You've never hosted. Just so people know, you haven't hosted, so it's all new.

I'm not good enough. I'm not good enough. Whoops. I keep your phone nearby. This is a long audition, this four weeks. It's a microcosm of the entertainment industry, right? It's just... Every emotion that a performer might feel, they have felt it around SNL. Like, everyone desperately wants to do it.

Everyone goes through emotions where they feel like they should be there or... And then they feel like they're being ignored and then they feel like they're embraced. And it's just a blanket. Every generation alive today knows about SNL. It's amazing. Turn off that.

What was that? That was me just saying you did a great job. alive today knows about SNL. It's amazing. Was that, that was me just saying you're doing a great job. At the end of a question, we tell you that's your limit. You know what's funny is Greg, little Wayne said, he said, the Super Bowl halftime show was ripped away from me. And I think that made me think of what Jim said, is there's, everyone in Hollywood at some point thinks SNL was ripped away from,

they're like, if they don't get asked, they feel like this is the year I've done enough, they should ask me, right? Kind of like that. Yeah, it's such a unique, because in our lifetime, in comedy, it's the last pillar of this significance. It's like even the status of, obviously HBO is great,

and I would love to do an HBO special. But like, it's like compared to like when I was in my 20s, an HBO special was enormous. I mean, you know, hosting the MTV Video Awards was like an incredible event at one point. And SNL has remained. And let me read these other things that Lauren told me to say.

Do you want to start linearly? Do you want to like, you got the call to do walls governor walls? Sure. Yeah. Whatever you think. I don't know. I mean, everybody's talking to me coughing. Yeah.

Well, what I would say is a course when he was picked by Kamala, I say Kamala because I'm friends with her now. Yeah. I call her Kam Kam. Kam Kam. And once he was picked as the running mate, every dopey, out of shape white guy after Steve Martin turned it down was kind of like, what about this guy?

And of course, I would love to do it. But I also know that. Because of the prestige of SNL, it's it's not something that you can necessarily campaign for. Does that make sense? Yeah. So it's it's definitely you look thirsty. You just hope they find you. Right. Yes. And so my manager.

Was talking to some someone. And at one point, I was shooting a movie, you know, one day a year on a movie and I was in in in the the UK actually. And so then he called me. And he said, Hey, you know, I've been talking to this person about you for Tim walls. And I've been saying that you're sending me videos of Tim walls. And I go, really? And he goes, Yes. So now they're kind of saying, can I see those videos? And I was like, oh, so you want me to?

And it was like 10 o'clock the night before I was doing One Day on a Movie. And so then I kind of just went around my hotel room and put on a jacket and took off hotel room and put on a jacket and took off a jacket and put on a sweater. And these little things of Tim Walz, which is essentially I'm portraying my brother, Mitch, who lives in Indiana, who has a very Chicago accent.

It's just like a guy. And, but I thought that was funny. And normally for me, whenever I get that close, I definitely don't get it. Like, whenever I test for a sitcom, it's just... Marvel movie. Because life's hard for me. Yeah.

I was also 200 gigs. Well, you also have tons of gigs. What's that? I was over 200 at one point reading What's that? I was over 200 at one point reading for things, but go ahead, David. I said you also have a lot of shows booked and also sometimes managers, they told me we have the same management team

and they told me, hey, we're talking to these guys about this movie, we're talking to these guys about this movie and it's between you and another guy. I'm like, what movie? So that happens where it's like they're pushing and then you're not even aware if you want anything or not. I had not read the movie.

I didn't know what the movie's about. They're going, it's looking pretty good though. It's looking pretty good. I go, what is? But that's like you, they're like, by the way, you got Waltz. Second question, do you wanna do it? way, you got Walt, second question, do you want to do it?

Of course. I think he should do it. Everyone wanted you to do it. That's the funny thing is like, what if you said, I have no interest in that. And then they go, oh, now what do we do? And by the way. No, I mean.

Yeah. Go ahead. By the way. And guess what? I'm not lying. Yeah. And by the way. Again, it's SNL.

So it's, I mean, I guess it's, you guys have a different perspective on it, but it's this elusive thing that has been always out of my grasp. And, you know, as an American comedian, that's the, you know, the measuring stick used to be like, oh, you're a comedian. Have you been on The Tonight Show or have you been on Letterman? And have you ever been on SNL? And I did this short Jack Handy thing a million years ago.

Oh, wow. I love Jack Handy, of course. Where I played a murderer. Hmm, that's great. Interesting casting. Yeah. You know, SNL, this is probably of all years the year to do it. And the 50th is a big year and an election year

which is always big for SONNET Live. So the combo platter is a big, bigger deal. You know, so how fun you got to be a part of this one. Massive global pickup with this show. Yeah. It's crazy how viral everything, particularly the political thing on Espanel. It's like, there's the people that watch it, but now we're in this clip age where then the clip goes,

you know, the Daily Beast posts about it, the Drudge Report posts about it. It's almost, you know, it becomes unavoidable. I think Deadline, I follow Deadline, I think Deadline on Twitter puts every single sketch on. I never knew that. I mean, usually on a Monday you'd see what's the funniest thing they did, and they would show a clip,

and it gets out there on Yahoo News or whatever. And now suddenly, it's everything on my feed. I can see for sure every sketch. Even update. It's like boom. As they're coming out, boom, boom. Yeah, it's amazing. I don't know if this is true, but I think area on a grand day,

it was like the show, Yeah, it's amazing. I don't know if this is true, but I think area on a grande, it was like the show and then 350 million across all platforms, you know, TikTok, everything. So that it matriculates. I still, people just watch the first episode, you know, texting me, like, yeah, I saw that, you know. So anyway, so I meet, we meet.

You're coming in 8H for the first time. The read-throughs are now in 8H. They used to be in a little room upstairs basically. And it's set up with 40 people. There's tablecloths, there's cars like an Oscar party. There's piano, there's music. And it's kind of, I was a little nervous. I was coming in doing Biden for the first time.

That was the read through we were at, and you were reading. And so how did that feel? Because that's the first time you kind of hang it all out. Here comes Jim's take. It's very unnerving. And there is a sense that this can change in a moment's notice where Lauren could you know, Lauren could be like,

I didn't really like that. You know what I mean? And that's not to say that he's attaching an opinion to it. It's just the reality. So there was something of like, you know, I canceled all these standup dates. I hope they don't change their mind. Oh yeah, that's right.

But yeah, it was. Well, they can tweak, right? You know, you take your take on it. It's like a movie and then you get with the directors or people around or the writers and they say, could you, I mean, I'm just guessing, I don't know what happened, but sometimes they will play with it a little bit until everyone agrees this is the right feel.

Yeah, I was surprised at the amount, probably because there's just so much happening so quickly there, particularly in the cold open feels separate from the show in some ways, that I feel like Dana and I were like, well, well, because you know, these head writers, you know, are juggling so many things.

And the last thing you want to do is be a pest. And so it also doesn't serve your needs to be kind of like, what about this every two seconds? So there's, Dana and I are like, are we crazy about, you know, like, if you do catch someone's ear, you want to be very precise with an idea you have. You don't want to just be jawing their ear off, because you know also they've been,

they haven't slept for three days. So it's... Yeah. You pick your fights. You go, can I just change this line? You have to have like a plan. Like, can I just, this is my most important thing. Instead of going, it feels a little wonky. They're like, it'll be great out there.

And then you're like, oh shit, I didn't really specify what I needed. I think they've been pretty good all in all, but I know what you mean. There's a lot of different inputs into that cold opening and the political environment. It's moving in real time. But I think for someone like Jim, the standup,

he just knows that there's a rhythm and a musicality to the way you land a laugh and Yaz Walsh. So I kind of encourage you just to say, take it or leave it. We always, we don't try to push like put this in, but sort of suggest it. And a lot of times they're like glad, like, oh great. Now one less joke, we don't have of suggest it. And a lot of times they're like, glad, like, oh, great. Now one less joke, we don't, we don't have to fix it. Yeah. So it is kind of nice. But so I watched you

throughout the week get more and more confidence because then we go down, we're on our feet, we're kind of walking through it. And you know, you're kind of feeling a little better or how are you like? It's you know, it's also yeah, it's it's strange, but it's there's also nothing more fun than trying a new joke. Right. So there's nothing more rewarding, but it is. It is very strange and it's also, but you're also, you know, you're inserted into this all-star lineup, right, with Dana and Maya and Andy.

And so there is, yeah, no, it's fascinating. It's just so weird how there's, it reminds me, because there's been different times when I've been hired for different acting jobs, and you have a couple lines. For me, I'm such an obsessive person that whether I have two lines or whether I have like 10 pages,

that will take up all my time. I don't know about you. It's like, I have never seen you in all these these five weeks not holding the script. Yeah. And whereas like, I think Andy Samberg, I don't think he even looked at a script. He was so he's good at it. Yeah, he knows what he's doing. Just the cards, right? Which... And I think after the first week, I was like, I do have to read the cards. But, you know, also as a funny person, you know, it's much more important to get the sentiment of the joke

or the point of view of the joke than the exact wording. But yeah, it's so different. Because it's also, as we all know as standups, you go up there by yourself, you're the writer, director and editor. So if you're like not feeling it, you could just be like, I don't want to do that right now. And you can move on. But when you're, uh, particularly in such a, uh, you have like 80 eyes on you on this one, like, like, you know, what's he doing? You wanna be, you know,

obviously you wanna be respectful to the other performers and to the writers and, you know, I think when, you know, it's like different if you have your own TV show, you can sit there and go, no, I'm gonna say this. Whereas you wanna be respectful of everyone here. It was interesting on the cold opening, the first show, where we were ostensibly top secret, not revealed. We would go in secret ways to the building.

Who's going to play who on this thing? And then it was very gratifying to watch, you know, when you came out just with that kind of energy and doing the prayer hands and this. And then they would, for Andy too, they would kind of like, uh, uh, it's Jim Gaffigan. And then it would just really,

and I was sitting back on the couch going, well, that's kind of satisfying. They're like, we're so happy that you're doing walls. It's a great, you know, boost. Yeah. So, yeah, such a really kind of rewarding experience. It's bizarre. And the one with you and Bowen side by side,

that came together on there. That had some great moments. That was a killer section in there. Yeah, and I love the last minute. I actually love the last minute aspect of it because it reminds me of like when you're about to go on stage during stand up and you have an idea or you're on the subway and you have an idea that adjusts a joke that you've been working on for like an extended period. And it's that adjustment that really helps. I was just always watching Tim Walls' videos, and I would see him do a behavior,

and then I'd be like, all right, I'll bring that in. Because again, there's so many moving parts. It wasn't like, um, people were like, Tim Walls does this, can you add it? It was left up to me. You know, which I know is surprising. You know what, everyone's so good that, uh, as an outsider watching, you know, I would say,

give it to Gaffigan, give it to Maya, give it to Dana, and then they're gonna get it 98% there, because they're such perfectionists in their own comedy that it's kind of nice that you can hand it over, and you know it's going to be pretty much what it's gonna be. And they have so much on their mind. I think it's great that you're working on it, because you wanna just, every time they see you,

it's a tiny bit better, and they're like, oh, he's been paying attention, because we have other 22 sketches and all the other millions of things going on. And then if Kamala comes, they have to say, oh, now it's more security, more hassle, more confusion. I guess, wasn't it? I mean, I'm guessing.

It was- Oh my gosh. Yeah, speak to that. Just that whole evening. You know, there's times when, I don't know, I don't have a machine gun. I don't have an AR. But to walk down the hallway, and there's like six guys with machine guns, you're like, I don't know if we need six. You know?

I thought it was more like 12 or something. Feels like... It's like, I'm a pragmatist. I'm like, I'm not a gun guy, but I think a handgun would be more practical here. You don't wanna catch some. They seem to be six foot five. They had helmets, they had flak jackets, big boots.

And then night vision goggles. Night vision goggles. And then this assault rifle or machine gun or whatever it was. And you know, I'm dressed as a tomato. I'm like, hi fellas. You know, I was like. I never felt more feminine.

They have those goggles because they saw in the itinerary, it's Saturday night live. They're like, bring the night vision. Yeah. It's also, you know, and I don't know cause they were all very nice, very professional. Very professional. Absolutely. But you could also get a sense a little bit though, like, don't know, cause they were all very nice, very professional, very professional. Absolutely.

But you could also get a sense a little bit though, oh my gosh, we're at SNL. Do you talk to them like London guards? Are you allowed to talk to them? Yeah, I mean, they were, they were, but like when she came down the hallway, I had to, and then Dana, you got to hang out with her, right? Yeah, I mean, well, first of all,

when I was walking down the middle of those guys, Justice Biden, I just instinctually did a little salute. Like I was the commander in chief. So it was all very just, when is she coming? How is she coming? Everyone was waiting longer. Is she happy? And we needed to fit in a time for her to rehearse with Maya.

Just so we're waiting to do the notes. We're in 8H. There's a tension and a sensitivity going on, a quietness. It was like an exotic tiger was coming. When is Kamala coming? And she comes in and she turns and she gets a huge smile on her face, looks all around 8H and go, oh, my mother could see me now. And then kind smile on her face, looks all around 8H and go, oh, my mother could see me now.

And then kind of under her breath, she goes, of course she's seeing me now. I thought it was very sweet. Oh wow. Yeah. And so if we wanna jump ahead afterwards, that I was going down the hall, she'd done the cold opening and it was a very, whatever your political thing is,

it was a very human moment, the way the audience, the emotion of the audience for her in that studio for about two minutes couldn't help but kind of well you up. I mean, it just was sort of emotional. And then she's down in Maya's dressing room, her people go, oh, take a picture, because I was still dressed as Biden. And then I came in and she kind of went,

hey, and so I had about a minute face to face with her and I just did all my Biden hooks. No, I'm not kidding, I'm being serious. She laughed so hard, she was bent over laughing. So that was kind of interesting. So, you know, I guess she sees all of this from a different point of view, you know? But it was kind of seemed cathartic or something.

I don't know. People seemed to like it. No, it was... I thought it was really interesting because when they did the very brief rehearsal, and it was a long dress, so it was... It was not like there was an abundance of time for any of this. Oh, was it between dress and air, her rehearsal? Yeah.

Yeah, it was like close to 11 o'clock or something. Oh shit, that's 10 or 14 hours. And then they did the meeting after that. And so, God dang. When they did the, and they didn't even rehearse the whole scene, they just rehearsed her and Maya. And by the way, Dana, if I'm saying anything,

I'm not supposed to say, you guys have to cut this out. Oh, we have editing capability, by the way. So you can say anything. What I thought was really interesting, and this is just me being paranoid, is that Maya has such a presence and, you know, Maya has such a presence and blood of ice, and I mean that as a compliment, is that I was like, oh my gosh,

what if Maya's been doing this in this room for years? Then this person who's been on the campaign trail, who, you know, having come in five weeks earlier and was intimidated by the setting, by the live setting, even though I'm a stand-up comedian and a great actor. But when I was like, is Kamala going to... When they do that mirror thing, is the status of Maya going to, when they do that mirror thing,

is the status of Maya going to kind of be a disservice to Kamala? I don't think it was, but it entered my mind. You mean a super pro? Yes, whereas just, you know, Maya just is so, you know, such a home run hitter and just like never strikes out. That is the juxtaposition.

Is that going to end up being a disservice to Kamala? And it didn't end up being that way. It actually, I think that it really kind of, I think that Kamala appeared very warm and very, like I think it was a really important humanizing moment. Here, let me tell you what, Lauren also wanted me to say. No.

No, but it was one of those things where I was like, oh wow, she really hit it out of the park. I think Kamala, you know, it was held up her side because she's not an actress and she's coming in like on the fly. There's really almost no rehearsal. And so it is fucking scary as shit. Even if you, like you said, we've all done it.

If I was sitting there, I'd be freaking out. And your hand could shake. You don't know, you're just like, yeah, it's almost too much. And especially if you've never, I mean, she's giving speeches, but it's a different animal. I think Maya was- Let's be honest, you guys.

What's more difficult, being on SNL or being president? You know what I mean? It's SNL. It's just different. Absolutely. We just want the audience to know how hard it is. But you know, I think that, you're talking yourself in the mirror was the conceit and it's been done a lot,

but it was very maternal in a sense. And in the end, Pamela, Kamala, give me your hand. And it was written not in a hectic way. It was kind of slow and casual and relaxed in the way Maya was so supernaturally comfortable. I gave her a good joke. I mean, those, it was not too long, in my opinion, because I didn't know anything about it, you know. I didn't ask Dana for any spoilers. And I thought the Pamela was the first big laugh.

I was like, oh, that's great. And then they did a few plays on words, and then they sort of ended it. And it was like, oh, good. It's not dragging out forever. It's not, you know, classically like, oh, they went too long. It's like, oh great, tight. Get to say live in New York, big ending, get out. Yeah. And surprisingly it was just a very friendly audience.

It was, it was. Who would think? Who would think? But it was, it was, you know, I've said this, when I went to do the George Bush Senior White House, that I was sitting with Neil Young at the party, telling him that, and he just said to me, didn't even, it was in apolitical things,

he goes, oh, that's a human thing, man. That's a human thing. So it was like whatever your political stripe is, it was this woman who's been, now is running for president in this room, being kind of awestruck in some ways, and then having that sort of reaction. It's just like your, it was hallowed grounds for a moment.

It was like the only SNL can capture these kinds of moments because everybody knows it's live. Yeah, I mean, it's particularly in this year where I think the most important media piece was not these traditional media things, but I think her appearance on SNL was significant. You know what I mean? Like compared to like some of the media hits

that historically would, like I don't think they would even contemplate having her appear on, you know, a sitcom. Yeah, and anyone who sits there and the part where she asked Maya, do I really laugh like that? And she says a bit, you know, anytime a human being can laugh at themselves a little bit,

the likability quotient or the relatability quotient goes up. So yes, it was a home run as they say, but will people vote differently because of us? I mean, you and me in particular, or did we reorientate Western society? Absolutely not. Absolutely not. Absolutely not.

It says here in my calendar reorientate Western society. But everything is kind of nice when the reviews, casually I don't possess on them, but now you can not, I think it was New York times or something. You can't imagine anyone else playing waltz after seeing Jim Gaffigan was one of the ones I read. Yeah, that's very nice.

Well, thank you, Jim, for talking to us and going through it all. I'm here for another hour. We're gonna do three hours, David. Is that all right? Yeah, it's fine with me. Do you have a problem with that? I wrote out of stuff. When I was sitting close, you're like,

then I couldn't get rid of Gaffigan. Gaffigan now smokes. He smokes cigarettes now, and he's so comfortable. And young Cass will come up to him, Mr. Gaffigan, Mr. Gaffigan, could you help me with this? He goes, get out of my face, kid. I got better stuff to do. Yeah, I call everyone kid. By the way, I just want you guys to know,

you're going to have to plug my Hulu special, which is the skinny, which is on November 22nd. You have a stand up special on Hulu. Yeah. And it's called. And when is this coming? The skinny. Now, David, you gave this special recently.

Jim, we're trying to get rid of you. So if you could just wrap it up. No, get this in. A Hulu special is at November 22nd, have you said? Yes. Is that right? Am I reading this right? Am I reading this right? All these streaming sites, your words, not mine, how do you pick between Netflix, Amazon, and what's it called?

What's it called? 2D? Is that a real one? You know, John Can... You know, he went to Harvard too. I know, no, he's a TV character. He's like Colombo or something. I mean, I want to do them on the show. I'll just say we've been doing them on this show. Well, there's a brilliance to his kind of... Oh, the fumbling paper.

I read something here. Could I get this wrong? Yeah, again, am I saying that right? Am I saying that right? You tweeted on October 7th that you would kill all people. I'm just a simple folk that studied at the John F. Kennedy School of Public Relations. No, he's clearly very bright, but it's hysterical.

I see you squirming in your chair a little bit. He knows he set the trap for the guest. And it's's so funny. He has a little smile. He talks like he's in the movie Mississippi Bird. He jumped in. You're what we have here. It's a failure to communicate.

Now, do you think how much you think think it would cost to end climate change? But what about... I don't know. Well, a hundred trillion dollars. Who's the Congresswoman from California who has charts? Let me ask you this. You had 425. Katie, look at her mobile name.

Katie, she's like, she has her whiteboard. She's brilliant. So funny. I love the, I love no matter what's going on, I love being Cherokee. At least it's fun to watch. I don't even know what's going on. I just laugh at the go home. Rand Paul with Fauci, hysterical. You in fact killed millions of people. Are you prepared to apologize? Well, here's the fun.

By the way, it was, I know David wants to get rid of me, but it was, I thought Tim Kaine was great. I got to hang out with Tim Kaine afterwards. Me too. I promise you, I thought it was Tim Walz when he came out. That's how I feel about him. I got to hang out with Tim Kaine afterwards. I promise you, I thought it was Tim Walz when he came out. That's how dumb I am. I go like this.

I did a photo with Tim Kaine and we looked the same. We looked the same. By the way, it's a bit of a deep dig because he's Irish. To your casual viewer, you're like, there's some 24 year old kid going, oh, that really is. What's his name?

Tim. Tim Kane vice presidential nominate. I ran into him at the party. That was the game show one. Very funny. Game show was a great sketch. Smart. Monkey was very funny.

Dan Bula, of course. Very funny. Monkey in space. Yeah. That's some great stuff in there. John Mulaney, great host. Jim's like, I don't get to watch the whole show. I'm really lasered in.

I'm already drinking bourbon after that. Yeah, oh, you got your bourbon. On the rocks, though. On the rocks. Do you remember the name of your bourbon? Father Time. Father Time, you're right. Do you remember at the party when I saw your cheeseburger

and I said, I gotta get something to eat? And didn't I offer you half of it? Well, it was like a petite, it was a slider. It was the size of a silver dollar. You got the pasta. I did. Didn't rip it off cast members with sliders? That's a big story.

I did get the pasta, but guess what? In this first world problem, around 4 a.m., the waiter comes up, oh, sorry, the kitchen is closed. Oh, no. Yeah. Dana's van mowing Jim 25 cents for pickles here. I think that was my last episode because I was only contracted for that time.

Oh, no. Parties are amazing, but I'm so wrecked the next day. It's not like I'm drinking so much. It's just staying up till 5 a.m. 5 a.m. is when I turn the light out, you know, because it's just a lot of your peers and friends. You want to say hello to Marty Short or John Stewart. No, it's so fun.

Yeah, but I'm still tired from staying up that late. Yeah, a little bit. Yes. A little bit. Oh, you get home when everyone's jogging and you guys are driving home in your limo. These are just the, this is just the behavior of someone with a severe drinking problem

getting home at 5 a.m. Jim, do you think you'll still go to the parties if you're not on the show just every week? I think it would be too weird. I mean, I'm... I feel out of place even when I'm on the show being there. So I, no, I won't go. Have you secured an invite to the 50th?

No, I have not. I think that will happen. Have you secured an invite to the 50th? And I wish you had asked. No, I have not. I think that will happen. But wait a minute, so have you guys been invited? It's complicated. What is it? I'm gonna talk to Gervitz. You'll have to make a video. I told Lauren that you have made YouTube videos

in the hotel room about how you would be at the 50th. So you're gonna have to. I'd like to see one of those videos. Here I am at the 50th being nice to everybody. And here I am introducing Coldplay. No, that would be amazing. I've got a sneaky feeling that we're not done with Mr. Let's do, we'll also get on Saturday night.

Let's do Gaffigan on Saturday night. You know, here's one thing that I would add, even though David's trying to get rid of me. I was, there was, Dana, weren't you secretly hoping, like I was like, oh, hopefully Tim, Tim will also do something like, um... Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. His pants fall down or something.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. From news. I don't want him to humiliate himself, but he'll, you know, be in some... But there's competing for attention. And even when he would, you know, like, I think in a different time, like, him even playing Fortnite with AOC, that would be newsworthy, but we live in such chaotic times.

Oh, right, that would've been a good one. Who would play AOC? Who plays AOC, that would be newsworthy, but we live in such chaotic times. Oh right, that would've been a good one. Who would play AOC? Who plays AOC on the show, Heidi? I think Dana would, Dana would. Dana, you're doing all- I got an AOC. Dana ripping off characters from Casters. That's mine now, thank you. Hi, I'm AOC.

That's the other thing is, look, you don't wanna, like, I want to do other things. You wouldn't wanna take a job I want to do other things. You don't wanna take a job from someone. Yeah, that feels weird. Cause no one there at least looks exactly like Tim Walz. If you walked by a cast member, it looks just like him. He goes, hey, how you doing, man?

You're like, oh my God. To me, Tim Walz has been not around that much. And I just saw a speech or two or whatever. So I couldn't, when I see you, I see... I... It's Tim Walz. You know? I mean, no one knows the idiosyncratic speech things he has. I mean, you have the prayer hands and pounding the heart.

And then some of those... And I tried to do the ear thing, because he does the ear thing, and Lauren was like, get rid of the ear thing. Mmm, no, too much. Oh, to Carol Burnett, she would go like this. You know, Lily Tomlin used to go one ringy dingy, two ringy dingy. Do you want a big chair like Lily Tomlin too?

Come on. What are we doing here? You can play Tim Walsh as a five-year-old. We'll put a hair piece on you. Duh-duh-duh-duh. Um, no, you'll be back and I will lobby. It doesn't matter. I think you should host. The audience clearly on you. Choo-choo-choo. No, you'll be back and I will lobby. It doesn't matter. I think you should host. The audience clearly loves you.

And you're kind of iconic at some point. You've been famous. They need a white guy to host at some point. Right, I mean, something. And you're mostly white. I'm mixed. You're 120% white. I'm mixed.

I'm Irish and Scottish. Whoops. You. All right. All right. You're going to say goodbye because I cannot say it. So I've just been sitting here. Because they told me, our manager

said you get him off that fucking thing at 30 minutes or we'll go dark. And I'm like, we'll pull the plug. I'm like, oh my god. This has been a presentation of Odyssey Superfly as executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade, Jenna Weiss Berman of Odyssey, Heather Santoro and Greg Holtzman.

Hope you liked it.