Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade - SUPERFLY #56 - SNL50!

Episode Date: February 21, 2025

David and Dana talk SNL50, Ryan and Blake, Eddie Murphy, crowd work comedians, diarrhea, pranksters getting what they deserve, and much more. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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with iGaming Ontario. You know, when I'm on the road, Dana, I'm always pretty much staying in hotels, but there's been a shift to Airbnb and you hear about it all the time. Hotels are fine, they can be great, but Airbnb is a great alternative, you know, because you get a lot of choices on where you can stay.

Oh yeah. It's very practical. I mean, hotel can be like, oh, like when I go on the road, I go, that one's, the closest hotel is a half hour from the gig or something, but you say, oh, Airbnb. You just go, oh, I wanna go a little closer. I wanna be in this area. I want a swimming pool and I want this. Yes, and I famously have said many times a place

we used to go, my wife and I, to get away. And we stayed at some really nice hotels, but then we found this Airbnb, which we used, I think, three times. It was always spotless. The keys are outside in a little padlock and they used to have a bottle of wine and a note and you have a kitchen and it was very, very nice. The benefits of Airbnb is that space, privacy, better locations compared to hotels. You get to pick how close you want to

be to wherever you want to go. You're traveling with family, your friends, you're on your own. you want to be to wherever you want to go. You're traveling with family, your friends, you're on your own. It's great. Dana, wake up. This is the earliest we've ever done this. I'm up at six, six fifteen every morning, but we're recording very early.

This is farmer's hours. I don't want to give it a time, but it's very early. You can see that we both have drinking problems. So we have sunglasses on because we'd haven't been able to go to our dermatologist and get that sort of sponge vacuum thing they do for. I'll be doing it. Someone in the comments said,

you drink too much, you look so shitty. I don't barely drink at all. So it might be mother nature. Newsflash. Thanks for your commentary. If you drink heavy, you're gonna get booze face, resting booze face. But if you drink light and hydrate, then let her know.

I'll tell you another thing. If you like processed carbohydrates, a lot of them, like a lot of them, it's tough on the old epidural around the cranium. Hey, Dana, your epidermis is showing. Jesus Christ, you're doing AM things now. What is this, Good Morning America now? This is the Cock-a-Doodle-Doo show.

So we're doing this because we did already do Superfly Saturday in New York to give people a summary on this episode of the rehearsal, the blah blah blah. But we didn't do the real show. So we're just doing a pick up, an intro, a few things about the live show, and we'll probably do it again next week because there was too much going on Because there was too much going on.

There was too much going on. We could only do it Saturday. And then I thought, well, how can we talk about the Sunday night 50th on Saturday? Yeah. And David, I remember you, your eyes got real big and you went blank. You're like, holy tomatoes. I didn't even put that together. You're like, we can't talk about what hasn't happened yet, but now it has happened.

So I wasn't there. I had the flu. I was on the downside of it, but I still didn't have the oomph to travel. Wasn't recommended. So you went to represent our podcast. What do you got to say? The most questions I got about it, I'll just go through it, aside from Where's Dana, which we cleared up, was, which you did want to be there

and you would have fucking killed it, of course, was Ryan Reynolds and Blake being there. A, why were they there? They were there because I think they both hosted. If you've hosted, you are invited. You can come to any of those events, correct? Yes, and of course, we all know this, whatever. I don't do a deep dive on it, but there's some kind of legal action with some actor,

Baldino's, it sounds like some kind of pasta place. And, you know, I don't know what it is. I don't deep dive on it like you and Heather and Greg do, but our team, but you guys, but I thought it was kind of funny cause it's been in all the newspapers. Yes. I'm from the fifties, all the newspapers. And when Ryan Reynolds said, what have you heard basically tongue in cheek about it was a good moment. That was funny. Yeah. But of course they go, they should go to the show. They're like us just whatever's going on. You try to make a joke about it. But, uh But now listen, so they show up, I think nothing of it.

I don't really even put it all together. Why are they there? I'm like, oh yeah, they host. Everyone there is a celebrity, wherever you walk. It's 400 people and they're celebrities or old billionaires. There was a lot of cadaver, walking cadavers, Civil War veterans with money. There was a lot of actual cadavers, there was walking cadavers, Civil War veterans. With money. There was actual cadavers, there was walking cadavers. There was one foot in the grave.

Well, remember those, you'd see those old, old timey things and it's 1935 and here these Civil War veterans are now marching down Times Square. These gentlemen are now 119 but fought in the Civil War and they're in wheelchairs. It's very sad and poignant. But you give them some applause. We had some seniors. I would have been a senior. I'm not I'm busting myself too. Go ahead. Yeah. Someone gave me a compliment. They said I got old fast. So I said, oh, I haven't, I mean, I got old and the truth is I got old the normal way, but they

just said, it just seems very rapid. I said, okay, thank you. I don't like when people have this in you a while and they get a scared look on their face. They don't say anything. They just go casually, holy shit. They just go, whoa. I like that other version of you. What happened? Okay, so Blake and Ryan, here's my theory.

Two theories about this whole thing that people have asked me. One, it was funny. Two, I think Taylor Swift did not come, she came last time to the 40th, but I think they're in a bit of a snit. I hate to use these words, but I think there's a little bit of minor friction, possibly, I don't know for sure.

Oh yeah, I should insert this before you go any further. And I know it's going to come off like a non sequitur, but I watched the 50th with Taylor. Oh my God. Yeah, I know. We're just friends, casual friends, and I don't really go public with it, but you have a lot to say. Well, I think maybe there was some something there. Also, there was some kerfuffle because I guess Scarlett was married to Ryan Reynolds,

Scarlett Johansson, and she was all over the show. But not all over Ryan Reynolds. What a lovely human. She was so fun. She's a great SNL borderline cast member, and she was not all over Ryan Reynolds. What a lovely human. She was so fun. She's a great SNL, like borderline cast member. And she was not all over Ryan Reynolds. I didn't put that together for the longest time, but no one actually gave a fat fuck.

No one said anything. She wasn't weird. No one was weird about it. But I had read that and I'm like, this is always written by someone that wasn't there. But anyway, we were having fun and here's a little Nug, you know Wally, I love that Wally, he always gets shout outs here, I told him.

He gets shout outs a lot, he's our cue card guy since day one. For decades, the best, the best. And it's a sneakily really difficult job when he's timing those cards to the actor. They're sneakily heavy. And a side note, when Tom Hanks gave a speech at the Lorne like toast.

Oh, the toast to Lorne. The toast to Lorne, Seth was funny, Tina was extremely funny, and then Tom Hanks got up and he goes, this is gonna be a long speech. And then he had Wally come out with the cue cards, just in the middle of a bar, and do the cue cards so he could read.

That's a good joke. Yeah, that's a good bit, okay. So Wally gets, not tricked, but he goes on a radio station in Australia. I don't know how many press events Wally's doing. The cue card guy goes on a radio station. What, this sounds like a novel or something. It's hysterical.

But you know how it's like, he's so sweet. Now they definitely want to get one answer from him. So at the very end they go, hey, by the way, what was with that Ryan Reynolds thing? God, it just goes back up. Did he just make that up or was that an ad lib? And he said, oh, he had a different line in the script and then he came up with that.

And so- Well, that's sort of archetypal. It's a classic line. I guess we're gonna see it. Yeah. Right, I mean, it's such a throwaway, but because of the situation, here's what I saw. Let's see.

You're telling me the SNL's plan was not to have Ryan Reynolds poke fun at his wife's SH allegations, but it was actually- SA, sexual assault. ... who did not switch it up with a little improv. I 1,000% believe that. Cue Card Wally, who has been doing the cue cards for SNL for the past- Cue Card Wally.

Cue Card Wally. ... years is on the FIFI Fem and Nick show, and he actually spilled the tea. Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively have been in the news a lot, and Ryan Reynolds- Yes. We were on a- Was that an improv or was it scripted, his little piece he did? That was actually, he had a different line in rehearsal and he pitched that to replace it.

So that was his idea to do it. He pitched that. We wouldn't want to do anything to Roger Marshall unless they were in on it. Why? That was his line, that was his idea to do it. Right, he said, we wouldn't want anyone to do something that they weren't in on, which is true. We're not there to bamboozle a host. So he had to be aware.

It was a classic, why would have you heard when it was perfect. Great. And they didn't elaborate. They just did it. But when you're saying this, the Baldini, um, lively extravaganza kind of was all over the show. I texted Lauren afterwards, you know, wish I could have been there and instead of talking about the show, he just goes, Baldini will now counter Sue. I think that lively will probably get a new attorney. And I said, but boy, that that Tom Hanks was great.

And what, what, what about that monologue with Steve? And he goes, I don't know where Ryan Reynolds is on this, but certainly it really, it was, it's big at that 50th. You know, uh, uh, but Baldoni's meatball shop is still open. Um, but I will say Baldino, we've said it wrong. Baldoni's Meatball Shop is still open. But I will say Baldino, we've said it wrong, literally every single time we're adding vowels. I don't know, I'll say this right now, if he wants to come on and tell his story,

I would love that. We're the new fucking Kiki, Boo Boo, and Pop Pop Show in Australia, now. We're gonna put a shrimp on a baaaby. Barbie, no baaaby. I would say that it's also, you know, being at the SNL thing and everyone sort of saying, hey cool, Ryan Reynolds and Blake are here, it helps.

Okay, enough of them. Now I missed it, So what did I miss? What was the most emotional or fun? I watched the show. I did see Eddie Murphy. People ask me if I'm tight with Eddie Murphy. Everything bad has evaporated. I walked by him.

I saw him at something and then he was at Chris Rock's thing. I didn't talk to him, but there's absolutely no anything anymore. Everyone was cool. He was in sketches. He was upbeat. The 40th, remember, he didn't do anything. Yeah. Tracy Morgan's impression was great. And then he did that Black Jeopardy. I was, I had a great seat for that one. I saw it hilarious. Good to see Eddie doing Eddie stuff like that. He's great at it. I walked past him on the way into the show and he put his arm back and blocked me. And so I had to say hi and g'maw. He was super cool.

Dapped him up is too much lingo for you, Dana. What is the phrase water under the bridge? Who started that? I mean, it was Billy Bridge or Stevie Water, but water under the bridge means that whole thing with you and Eddie is so over. Now you're friends. I'm tearing up behind my cool face right now.

We were friendly. We should have taken a picture because it was fun to see him. And then there was no weird vibes at the show. Okay, sketch of the night. Blink. Sketch of the night. Oh, that's tough. I liked a lot of different things.

I liked Amy and Tina going, am I being too political? I liked Amy and Tina going into the audience and Q and A. They're always funny to me. When you see the script and it says audience Q and A, and there's 35 celebrities listed in the cast that are in, that's so fun because Peyton Manning is doing one joke. Everyone flies in for one joke.

It's great. And some hit really big. I thought the combo of Lovitz's joke, which is funny that he's sitting so far away in the American Girl's story store. It's good. Hilarious. And then he goes, I'm not mad. I'm just saying.

I just want to know why. Yeah, so fun. I think it was the, yeah. So Tina and Amy are great writers, super like them. And then they come back and she said, Oh, we gave that seat to Julia Weasley's you know, emotional support dog. Well, I felt bad that I couldn't go because I think that Mike and I were supposed to do Wayne's World. So I was glad and I thought that Linda Richmond, the coffee talk woman came out and really

scored and we talked about it. And I said, Miles Teller was kind of nice looking, playing it very real with them. And they're the long Island, Amy and Maya. And then Linda Richmond comes in like this neurotic, like crazy person. And he's landing all his hooks, and they're playing it kind of straight. They're trying to understand this crazy character. So I thought that landed very nice.

So I was happy about that for letting- Yeah, Mike got a good score in there. And you know it was good, because it was, and Wayne's World would have done great, but it was fun to see that, because the show was bloated out to about 320. 320, yeah. Wingsworld would have done great.

I would have been really happy to do it, but I couldn't make it. Yeah, Garth looks sickly. I saw him the other day at the mall. The Garth, Garth Brooks? Your Garth, he's like, oh, my Garth. He's just walking around.

He's at the comic book store. He just got tubes, man. So, leave him alone. You know what was one I would have edited out? This is a ballsy tape. Are you ready for fucking front headlines? Edit? I would have lifted the blue sheet at the end.

That just made me sad. It made me sad. It made me sad and Paul McCartney had to follow it. Great, because Tom Schiller was a great little filmmaker. He did some cool stuff, but in that moment, I felt a little sad. Well, first of all, Bill Murray's there. He's watching all his friends.

If we were there and we see people that we were super tight with and they're all passed away, it's heavy for me and I didn't know them all and it just makes the whole place go, holy shit. Now that was a big famous video they shot for like the first or second. It was a short film, Tom Schiller, Tom Schiller vision. Maybe the first or second or third season, right? Yes, yeah. And it was cool and And Belushi was really good in it. It just was sort of a left turn after scared straight. And Debbie Downer, every time I see it, I'm happy. And the reason I get so happy is that the sound effects start to change over time.

I actually wanted more. I wanted a foghorn. I actually wanted more. I wanted a foghorn. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm anything. That's great. We always love to see that. And, um, Rachel, she's great. Uh, she's now, what do you think Chevy at the beginning? Cause I know some of the people who was listening, you know, top 10 update. He did say in not any particular order. Oh, he's done with Bill Murray. Bill Murray. Sorry. Did I say Chevy? Oh, Bill Murray, not in any particular order. Chevy was on there, but we saw our friend Dennis was on there. Oh, oh, on the-

Update, update, Bill Murray, top 10 update guys. My first Bill Murray story before I tell you that was they put you in the audience and you look at your placards, you know, during rehearsal you see where everyone's going to wind up sitting and you go, oh, that person's here. Oh, they're coming. And then I was over here. I told you I was nowhere near you. And then when I went to the show,

they go, your place is different. And it was front row next to Bill Murray. And in front of Merrill Street, Marty Shaw, I was like, oh, this is great. And Brandy Carlisle, to my left. So I go, this is super fun. And they do it, and then Bill Murray's backstage, but when we go out, it's three minutes

and they're like, oh, he's not out there. So bless his heart, seat filler comes in. They do a joke about Bill Murray, to cut to him is the point of it. And the camera guy goes like this. And he goes, I see him on the headset. He's like, he's not there. And they put the camera, I'm like, oh, what a bummer.

There's two people there I would have actually sheepishly went up to with pen and paper and said, excuse me, could I get an autograph? Right. That would have been Meryl Streep and Brandy Carlile. Those would have been two people I wouldn't, I don't ever do this and I don't want a picture. I want a signature. So I thought Meryl Streep was, it was so fun to watch her in the abduction alien sketch with next to Kate McGinnon,

because she was having so much fun. And when it ended, you could see she was on a high, because she's done everything, but has she done sketch? Never hosted. Never hosted. Yeah. Maybe Streep will now. I guess her and Martin Short are friends. We don't know friends with Benny's. I want to hang out with Martin Short as much as I could actually. Yeah. What are the, if they are together fun.

Cause remember we all went to the store. We all went to the comedy show that night and uh, what a fun thing. It's fun. Those two look like a blast. Well, Martin, I don't know her. I just know she's a genius, but she's also seems very real. And Martin Short can go from serious, dramatic, profound to funny in a flash. So if you're at a party and you sit next to him, then you're just happy.

He's not always on, but he can be on. You know, she seemed very lighthearted. And I love seeing Nicholson there. That was very cool. I was like a tearjerker. Like what a fricking movie star. Ladies and gentlemen, Adam Sandler. Ladies.

Hey, thank you. Oh, thank you. Jack. I'm doing Sandler's in his real voice. Not the, and his song was great and very emotional. That teared me up. Yeah. I'm real six years Jan gave props to everyone. Yeah, unreal. Six years, Jan.

Gave props to everyone. Yeah. Got a standing ovation. Yeah, the only standing o, with our friend Sandman. Sure. Just saying. But it was emotional and well written. Dan Bula on the keyboards.

Yeah, of course. Adam's right hand man. And music. You know what I do like about this whole thing, Dana, is aside from Bula is great. I didn't mean to cut you off there. When you see a host like Adam Driver, who I don't know from Adam, I don't know this guy.

Literally. He's just a big star, seems kind of quiet. He just comes, like everyone comes and just says, hey, if you want to put me in something, if not, I'll sit in the audience, this will be a fun event. And they go, this is how it works. They write a sketch. They wrote that New York musical sketch and they go,

hey, Adam Driver, you're here. Do you want to play a hot dog? He goes, yeah, yeah. And puts on a hot dog costume, goes out there. Maya's a syringe. I didn't figure out she was a syringe and I was in it. It took me till the very end, because I took a picture of her.

Oh, I never posted that one, Heather. Maya being a syringe was so funny. She's backstage like this. Yeah, it was a little dark, because I took a picture of her. Oh, I never posted that one, Heather. I should have, Maya being in this range was so funny. She's backstage like this. Yeah, it was a little dark, but those things are so much fun. I love Nathan Lane, my old buddy from the Mickey Reney shop. Oh, cocaine and vodka. Coming out, cocaine and... You know, I'll just say this for inside baseball.

When you're a movie star, you're in your trailer most of the time. Vodka. You go out, you do 20 takes or something. It's so slow motion. And then you go here and it's live and you're dressed like a hot dog. It's just a rush. And everyone's laughing during your take

instead of after when you're in a movie, you're not allowed to make any noise. And everyone's high-fiving you and you're just running into people you don't even know. And they're like, hey, I saw you in this. Yeah, yeah. But he was cool. He was also a score.

I was telling you earlier when Julie Louise has Yeah. So, but he was cool. He was also a score. I was telling you earlier when Julie Louise has her seeing the dogs blind and she goes, he's getting weird vibes from Adam driver next to him. The energy and Adam drivers like this. Just staring, just not playing it too big. Just staring off. No, that guy is- Because everyone says he's got a weird vibe.

It's so funny. Look it up. It's not probably on Amazon Prime. You can look up Ferrari. He was so brilliant. Was he good in that? Well, he was ridiculous in that. I mean, it's kind of a dark movie, but that guy's brilliant.

So to see him do live sketch, I think he had a time of his life, you know? Cool, dude. We will wrap it up because we have the actual podcast, but other than that, Kevin Costner was just there at rehearsal, just watching. They wound up putting him in the audience just because he was coming to the show, he went to rehearsal, he was at Chris's.

So he sort of, he felt right into the mix and... Yeah, Costner just looks cool. He just always looks cool. I don't know what. He looked cool. He looked like someone from young guns. He's just standing inside. He's very comfortable. Like you can talk to him and he's very nice, but if no one's talking to him, he's okay just being by himself,

just staring, watching. Or if you talk to him. So I don't know if people know this, like he's an inventor. He loves movies. Don't get me wrong, but he'll talk about he had stuff for when the Gulf of Mexico, now the Gulf of America, there was an oil spill and he has the technology to do that. So he's like an inventor as well as a producer director.

Dancing with Wolves was good. Go out on a limb. It was fine. It was fine. Yeah. Wolves were not dancing. I'm a movie reviewer. It would be nothing without the wolves. Okay. That's it. So let's leave it at that. And now we're going into the real podcast that we already did that we'll tell you about

the rehearsals and all the other stuff. And back in time, back in time, now you'll, this is like sort of a trippy one because now you'll hear us talking and not before the actual 50th. So this is a little Twilight Zone, a little Rod Serling for you. So don't get thrown. Okay, thanks.

And we will see you on the other half of this podcast. God save the Queen. So the sports book Born in Vegas, Dana, is, you know, our friends over at Bet MGM, which you can always tag them, follow them. Bet MGM, NBA fast break, free to play. Now see here. See here. See here. Now what you have to do is log in to BetMGM every day and play new Fast Break basketball game for your chances to win prizes.

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If it's not that, I don't want to hear it. Let me think for a minute. Oh, have you heard of this one that you, I'm going to introduce to you, this new podcast that's called Campus Files, a weekly series that dives into some of the wildest scandals that have taken place within colleges and universities. Often revered as a beacon of integrity and excellence, sometimes the reality of college life is just absurd. Oh yeah, so I've been to Arizona State University.

I know very well. It's, you know, from rigged admissions to sports scandals to Greek life drama. Campus Files exposes the stories that you won't hear on the campus tours. I gotta admit, this is a really good idea. Listen to and follow Campus Files and Odyssey Original Podcasts available now on the free Odyssey app and wherever you get your podcasts. Okay, so Dana, I'm here at a hotel.

Let me guess the four seasons. No, I'm not going to tell everyone. I'm just going by the wall. But what does it matter? This doesn't matter. It's over. Well, I'm here during the SNL weekend and I will walk you through the steps and we're only on just just to full disclosure, Saturday night, is that what it is?

And the show is Sunday night. So this is airing Fridays. This is a little ahead, but people will know I'm not giving spoilers because it's over already. Right. Right. And for me, I had lingering effects from the flu, cough, and fatigue, so I was told not to travel. So I couldn't make it.

And if I had made it. Yeah, I saw we were sitting in the audience. I was like, oh. They all clackered. Yeah, they don't even put us, but we're not even near each other, which is the worst thing. Well, yeah. Isn't John Lovitz, didn't, we're past tense now,

didn't John Lovitz and Kevin Nealon sit together? I don't know. We don't know. It, half the fun we were saying is looking where they put all the placards, you're like, holy shit, this is gonna be, I was eating my Caesar salad and I realized I was in Meryl Streep's seat, but we'll show a picture of that.

I'll send them a picture, Heather. And so just now I got back from rehearsal, they put me in a line in a sketch, so it is the longest sketch. Ha ha ha ha. It's not the Californians, was it is the longest sketch. Ha ha ha ha. It's not the Californians, was it? No, no, I'm thinking of the 40th. This is Mulaney and I'm like,

I don't even have to read it. Mulaney and Colin Jones wrote it. I love it. Oh, let me guess. They did a big Broadway show. Yep, it's kind of, it's singing. Yeah, yeah. That's, he did one when I was there in the fall.

It was very cool. A lot of moving parts that I think a bus came in and Bo and Yang came out. It's like, oh yeah. And Pete Davidson is always there at the beginning. That's a- And I'm with Pete Davidson at the beginning. So we're, we're by a hot dog cart.

And we're basically saying, hey, we're new to New York. It's 1975. We're artists and we're excited to, and John's like, don't you know that it's New York? And you read the screen, it's 1975. No one wants to be here. It's the city's trash at this point. Dangerous.

So we're trying to figure out, he kind of walks us through, he goes, I'll let New York speak for itself. And then, you know, someone comes out as a hot dog and. Yeah, yeah. I've seen them, they're very entertaining and really, really produce big, big, big, big kind of. Yeah, we're. Number.

We're over on the side and I go, don't squinch us over here. But then it moves to, I think, Maya and Adam. It takes up multiple sets and spaces. Yeah. Yeah. You go, us, Maya, Adam, Driver sing. A lot of people can sing, you know, I think you can sing too.

I don't really sing so luckily I'm just saying. No, no, no, I'm not. Maya can sing. Maya can sing. A lot of these girls, Kristen Wiig is there, I love. She, I never see her. I never see her out. So a lot of fun to see her.

She sings, it's funny, Scarlett Johansson, just the most random group. That's the fun of having people back, like the 40th. You just throw people in. I think Billy Crystal's in it. I think Nathan Lane, you know. Well, that's the kind of sketch that you could really put a lot of people in it.

Yeah, just cram them in. Yeah, everybody gets, you could the kind of sketch that you could really put a lot of people in it. Yeah, just cram them in. Yeah, everybody gets, you could just think of, oh, he'll do this, she'll do that. Everyone gets a laugh. And so, so I just ran home and just walked on here because they can't, our run through for our sketch was, what was it, four hours, I think? At least, yeah. And that's long for a rehearsal, four and a half.

So we got there. I had to use Heidi Gardner's dressing room. Oh. And when I got in there, because you know, there's a shortage. Yeah. So I go in this dressing room and there's all, I go, is this someone's dressing room?

And they're like, yeah, it's Heidi's. I was like, well, that's nice, it's cool, I feel bad. And then I see a gift bag, and there's also one for Ryan Reynolds, and they're like, oh, he's using it right now, but his sketch is done. So he and Blake are leaving, and you take over now. So if he comes back in, he'll just grab his gift bag.

So when I'm leaving, of course I have to do a bit. He's signing something, and I go behind him and go, wait, are you getting paid for this? And oh, big laughs by the page desk. And then said hi, and then we talked for a second. And then I went in and waited for our sketch, but really fun rehearsal day. Did you use your time in New York City

around all these talented, famous people to pitch them coming on one of our shows? You know what, I didn't. I know, it's so awkward. It's so awkward, but a lot of people have seen it. A lot of people say we saw it, you know, and they listened to it or whatever. Everyone's very cool.

You know, one of the cool things was when I was waiting to go on, I saw just Kevin Costner standing in 8H just watching. And so naturally I just go chat him up, but he's just like, yeah, I'm not in the show. I'm just checking it out. I said, hey, if Yellowstone needs a punch up, we'll get some big fucking laughs in there.

We got some big set pieces we can do. Yeah, he's pretty cool. I'll tell you a little one minute story. So, a while back I was doing a Bob Costas charity event in St. Louis for whatever reason, I don't demand anything, but I was doing a corporate in Texas and Bob Costas provided a private jet for me to St. Louis. And then it was gonna take me home.

So then we do the show and Costas is there with his band and he's really good. It's like a country where it's a man. I go, your songs are here. It came up. It was catchy songs. It was catchy. He thought maybe it was a diss. Catchy. What do you mean catchy? Well, catchy is good.

That's the Beatles. But then we're at the after thing. We're at the table, having fun, talking and stuff. And it came out that I have a private jet. It was a Citation 10 brand new, taking me back. At that point, I was living in the Bay Area. So I said, you should jump on. Yeah, for sure. So for about two hours, he was coming on the jet.

It was gonna be really fun hanging out with him. Oh my God, how fun. And then the guy came over, whatever. Somebody came over and said, oh, sorry. The jet can't drop you off in Napa, California, and then take Kevin to Santa Barbara. So then it was a big... Whomp, whomp.

So then this is the part where... And I was like saying, yeah, but we could drop him off. You know, I was just kind of embarrassed in a way. Why do I have a jet? Fucking Kevin. And then he was so cool about it. No, this doesn't matter, it's fine. Yeah, he was just, and not even for one second, one millisecond did he go,

what's that guy gonna jet? And I'm not. So anyway, that's a showbiz story right there. Oh yeah, I saw a clip of Yellowstone, and he goes, hey, Rip, hire someone here and don't hire some sissy. Like, okay. Then they hire a girl that's like sort of a redneck girl.

That's the only clip I just saw. There is no more alpha male show and it was a sleeper. It built the whole Taylor, Sheridan empire. Now we have land man. But when I first started watching Yellowstone, cause I loved that. I was bullied as, you know, I was a little kid, so I loved the idea.

You and me are gonna tussle. You wanna throw dagging on, come on. You know, every guy wants to beat the shit out of someone else for just looking at him the wrong way. Yeah, I love it. You're talking to me, I'll talk back to you with my fist. I'll beat your fucking ass. Yeah, he has a cool gruff voice in it.

Love Costner, I love we're talking about Koster, the only guy that is not in the show, but he is cool and everyone needs to understand that it's really fun to see him in the real world. I'm gonna do a day and then hold this. Hey folks, what's going on? A little crowd work? Yeah, I do a little.

Hey folks. Have you tried the evil? You guys married? Here's what I do when I do crowd work. I go, they always have shitty appetizers. So I go to a couple, I go, what'd you guys married? Here's what I do when I do crowd work. I go, they always have shitty appetizers. So I go to a couple, I go, what'd you guys have there? Chili bites? And they're like, no, I let them answer.

What'd you guys have? And they're like, oh, hot dog, mini wieners. And I go, no, that's not a good one. Hey, what'd you guys have there? I'll do it to you, Dana. And then you say. What do I say? You say pizza.

Well, normally they're having pizza bread or something like that. Yeah. Yeah, say pizza bread. Hey, you guys, are you guys together? Yep, say yes. Yep, yes. What do you guys have in?

Pizza bread. Oh, anniversary or something. Anyway, then I walk over here. So the joke is for an anniversary, they're just having pizza bread. Yeah, and I look around, I go, what'd you have, a big pretzel? Oh, anniversary, birthday or something?

My biggie, my go-to is this is, I think it was great. I just want to know if you use this joke. We're going back to the 80s. And I will, whenever you, whatever you say. It changed, it changed. Heckler heckles, right? So heckle me. Hey, I'm Dana Carvey and what's going on?

Oh, hey, bring on the last guy. Hey man, I don't come to Jack in the Box and bother you when you're working. God applause. God, applause. It would kill. And you know what the 2025 one is? Yeah. I don't come to your job and slap the dick out of your mouth

while you're working. You know that one, that always kills. Little X-rated for me though. Yeah, it's a little, Dana, you can work clean. You and Nate Bregazzi. No, Nate is perfectly clean. Oh, I will tell you one more story before we get into it. So I land, I run into Anya, Anya Taylor-Joy on the plane.

Oh. On the flight, yeah. She was on the flight with her husband, cool dude. I love her, very cool to see someone like that dressed like a London, like suede shorts or something. She looked great. Anyway, so blah, blah, blah. Go eat by myself when I land. And you know, there's nothing the first night.

So Chris Rock talked about maybe we'll do a set or we'll go do standup or something, why not? So I get there by myself, I eat at Houston's. I know it's not New York-y enough. Yeah, yeah. But when I was in Houston, I ate at Manhattan's. Good night. So.

Try the wine. Try the view. So I go, so Nate Bregazzi is in town and I forgot to see that he was here. And he said, hey. He made Bregazzi a Bregazzi, is he a Nazi? He's not, but it rhymes. If it rhymes, you gotta say it.

Exactly, it's funny. So, so then Nate says, I'm at this comedy club, you wanna go do a set? And I said, yeah, what about the Comedy Cellar? And he said, we'll go there next. So I met him, we drove to Comedy Cellar, and the way, Rock is in bed, it's not that late, but he goes, I'm just laying around.

I go, you wanna come out? If you go to the Cellar, I will. And I go, okay. So we go to the Cellar. So he's almost asleep, he's in pajamas, and if he goes to a certain comedy club, he gets up, gets off his slippers. It's only like 10.30.

So he puts on this beanie, comes down. So then we go, and you know, you have to bump everybody. And that's the hard part. So Leslie Jones is on, I think. So they already have a good lineup. And then I go, Nate, why don't you go up? Bring me up, I'll bring Chris up. Because he's just- So you're gonna follow Nate?

If there's no winning, Leslie's hard to follow, Nate will fucking kill. Leslie's hard to follow, she's a, yeah. She's a pistol, she's a- She goes, she goes, I did your favorite, crowd work. I go, oh yeah, when she was on the podcast, we talked about crowd work. People that are civilians, quick insert, and I talked to some people today,

they think crowd work is the bravest, hardest thing any stand-up could do. They just think, could you, would you ever, I saw this guy, Matt Reif, he did his whole thing with crowd work. That was amazing. Do you think you could do that too? Or you'd be too scared to go? Well, you don't have to write any material and you record five shows. Matt is great at crowd work, but it is kind of nice. Material's hard, go ahead with your story. So you're down with the seller, you're following Nate.

Yeah, I'm not a crowd work guy, but it's actually too hard for me. I would get lost, you know, you gotta go, this couple is here, and why don't you go home with them? And you know, if you really earn that know, you gotta go, this couple is here and then why don't you go home with them? And you know, if you really are in that vibe, it fucking kills, it's great. So anyway, and so this is all one show, right?

So I go, oh, they're getting a pretty good show. And then they go, oh, are you kidding? You know who was just on before you that popped in? Mulaney, Steve Martin, Martin Short. So it went those three, Leslie, and then us three, and that's just one show. Okay, hold on, you're blowing my mind. Are you saying that Steve Martin got up

and did stand up at the cellar? Yeah, practiced stuff with Martin, and then Marty got up with him. Oh, with Marty, yeah. They said he got up alone. I saw a picture of him alone up there. Oh, I see, you think, okay, all right. Well.

Seeing Steve Martin do it in a club would be, you know, the end all and be all. Because growing up with Steve Martin and listening to his albums, knowing every move from the albums, picturing it, just so cool. I just reread his book. It's the second time I read it.

Oh, right. You were talking about that. Yeah. So, he's a scientist. It's called Standing Up, Life Standing Up, or what is it called? Little bit of his childhood, but basically him starting out in Disneyland

and then Knott's Berry Farm. Was he a magician or something? Yeah, magician and a magician comedian, and then eventually comedian or deconstructing stand-up. And they show you in the book, it's kind of cool, his notebook and his notes. Oh, wow.

And he wrote in there, when the tricks don't work, it's funnier. So, like, being a bad musician, or sorry, magician. Yeah, so it's kind of, it's really an interesting look into the mind. Oh, well listen, Steve Martin, can't do any better, Martin Short, just picture those crushers, then Malaney. Got it, and then you got Leslie Neilsen,

and then you waltz in there. And I waltz in. And then little David, and then you come in and crush. You know how it is, they always give you big applause, they go crazy, and then you start talking like, what the fuck? I hate that, did they give you like, let's go crazy. And then you start talking like, what the fuck? I hate that. Did they give you like, let's keep this going.

This guy's everywhere. One of the funny, did they give you the big booming intro? Well, it was Nate. It was Nate. So he was pretty cool about it. Oh, he introduced you. With Chris, I was just like, okay, I'm done. Well, here's Chris Rock.

So they go crazy, but Chris goes, lower your expectations. Cause there's really almost no way you can try new material. And I wasn't ready. I've been on the movie so much that I haven't really done. So I'm like, wait, I got a little buzzed at dinner and I'm like, I don't want to go on. Then I got there and I go, I'll do a couple. Here's the best joke of the night for me.

All right. This is what I want to hear. This is to the manager before I go on. Unfortunately, it's obviously not on stage was I Yeah. This is to the manager before I go on. Unfortunately, it's obviously not on stage, was I getting this joke. But now it's gonna beam out on this podcast. Yes, this is a joke that will be funny to comedians. They said, okay, so Nate's bringing you up,

you bring up Chris. I go, great. I go, how long's Nate doing? They go, about 10. They go, how long are you gonna do? I go, I'll do I go, great. I go, how long's Nate doing? They go about 10. They go, how long you gonna do? I go, I'll do about 12, 14. And they go, okay, when do you want the light? I go, give me the light at 30.

Because obviously every comic just stays forever, but they act like they're not gonna go on for a long time. I know, if the crowds hop, but let me ask you a question. This is Inside baseball alert. You can put up a Chiron, Greg. Okay. I don't like to get a light because I never see the light go on.

I'm just not looking in the right place. So at one point I look up and the lights on and I wonder how long has it been on? I get it, yep. And have I gone over and didn't know it? So then I panic, I get quiet, I drop the mic and I kind of slump off and it's like, you know, one clap.

Yeah. For more Inside Baseball, if they say, we'll give you the light, you're headlining, right? We'll give you the light at 45, 250. Okay. And like you said, you know you don't wanna watch on, you're like, I feel like it's time. And then finally you see like a flicker,

guy's got a candle. I'm like, wait, I should have said, what's the light? Because usually it's a flashlight directly in your eyes going pow pow, or just turned on. On or off. So a guy lit a can? So someone's like got his watch on and he's blinking it one time at a club

and I'm like, he goes, I gave you the light. I go, that was the light? I thought you were- With your Apple watch? Yeah, I was like, I thought you were checking. From 400 feet away? Yeah, I'm like, we gotta figure out what the light is because like you said, I did a corporate and they said do this much

and there was no time on this, there's supposed to be a timer on the stage. I got a small clock over here. And then I don't have my watch on. Now I'm just fucking free balling and raw dogging. And I'm like, I think this is my act. This is about the time, but you go one minute under. They can say, didn't do your time per the contract.

Okay. Here's another inside baseball alert. They ask you sometimes at corporate dates, they got a big clock. Yeah. You want it to go from zero to 60. Oh, great one. Or 60 counting down. Great one.

And when it's counting down, I get kind of nervous. I can't do it. It's sort of weird. You know why? Because I can't remember which way I said. Yeah. So it says 22 minutes, I go, wait, have I gone on? If I can't remember which way I said. Yeah. So it says 22 minutes. I go, wait, have I gone on?

38? Yeah, have I gone on? And then I go, how much more is 20? I say just count it up. So I know when it gets to 50 or 60, I'm done. Yeah, don't do any math. Counting down is rough because I can't tell how much I have.

I had one gig fairly recently, casino, maybe 1500 people, they're packed. I have a friend was with me opening Larry Bubbles Brown. We go backstage, nobody. We go up the stairs to the, nobody. We look out the audience, hub, bub, bub, bub. It's eight o'clock, ready for the show, nobody. What the fuck is going on?

Hello, is anybody, what, do we just start? Do we start? Nobody. And then we see up these stairs behind this thing, this big light, there's a guy sitting up there, a silhouette of a guy. So we climb up the stairs and we sort of knock on the window and he's just like surfing the web, looking over his shoulder.

Oh, what? Oh, okay, it's starting in time. It's like 15 minutes late. That's the only happened once. It was very interesting. Well, they didn't even let the audience in yet? No, the audience is in just talking. Just going eight, 10. But the mic wasn't on backstage. And nobody was there. Just nobody.

Nobody backstage. So, this is the terrifying part for you people out there. I'm gonna try to stand up. This is the stuff that can happen. This is Carrie the fire. I'm your host, Lisa Laflamme. Carrie the fire, a podcast by the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation featuring inspiring personal stories about what happens when world-leading doctors, nurses, researchers, and their patients come together to ignite breakthroughs.

Carry the Fire launches Monday, January 27th, wherever you get your podcasts. Are you crushing your bills? Defeating your monthly payments. Sounds like you're at the top of your financial game. Rise to it with the BMO Eclipse Rise Visa Card, the credit card that rewards your good financial habits. Earn points for paying your credit card bill in full and on time every month. Level up from bill payer to reward slayer.

Terms and conditions apply. I was thinking of those, oh, well, I was gonna tell you about the, the government spending that's in the news and how I saw Kennedy, our boy, going through it. And it's all, it's funny anyway. how I saw Kennedy, our boy, going through it. And it's all, it's funny anyway. And then he always acts so casual and quizzical. He is the greatest show on television.

It's like Andy Griffith from Mount Rock Lives. You can't even believe he's a senator. The aw shucks senator. Aw shucks, he's shuffling papers and everything is slow motion and really clear. This is exactly what he said. It's not a bit, he goes, my friends on the other side of the aisle, this is about taxes,

always ask who's gonna pay more? Who's gonna pay more? But they never ask where the hell did the money go to? Your words, not mine. So he is so funny listing off all these agencies and all these quirky expenses. I read through this and said, can I have a puke bucket? He literally said that can I have a puke bucket?

He literally said that. I need a puke bucket because 12.6 million on finding a cure for monkeys with dandruff. With dandruff in Indonesia? Five million dollars to find out whether frogs like the way they look. Excuse me, do frogs even see? Is it for mirrors?

Cause I can get you a better deal on a mirror. This is from the NIR National Institute of Research. These are real. $800,000. Do dogs think we should all walk on fours? 800,000. 6.9 million. Are dogs bothered when we pet them?

$1.5 million dollars. Do red ants know they're red? Why? Why do ants have to know the color? 1.2 billion. That's a B. For men to find out, are blue balls a real ailment?

Or is it just a hoax? The funniest part is the specificity of the number. Yeah. Two point, because it seems real. Eight, seven. Two point seven billion dollars to the NRI is an orgasm similar to a sneeze. Two point eight billion dollars. And I hate to pull the plug, similar to a sneeze. $2.8 billion.

And I hate to pull the plug because you might've almost figured that one out at this point, but you didn't get there yet. We're still paying. We have to escalate. $6 billion to find out if the name pickup truck encourages casual sex. Pickup truck encourages casual sex. And the...

Sorry. 72, am I reading this right? 0.81 billion to find out if Miley Cyrus is still talking to her dad? Cause he's a drinker? Okay, here's the other one. Can we call her? $3200 to the NIR. Yeah. Why do teenage girls say the word like so much?

Like we went there like we did that. $3200 of taxpayer money. 1.6 billion to find out if you ghost someone, it's related to the paranormal. Now, this feels like a waste. $420,000 of your taxpayer money. Oh, it's lower. I like to mix it up. Yeah, I like it.

The man who invented the idea of calling someone being assaulted mugged was actually drinking out of a mug when he thought of that term. Or $127. Let me get this straight. $182. What?

So David Spade can get some more crowd work? That's all it takes? Give him more. $1.58 to pay people on the street to remember in the moment what was the name of David Spade's last Netflix special. Oh shit, I don't have any more. I can't think of it. No, that was a good one.

Go with it. We'll mix it up. That was funny. Well, it's hard to exaggerate. This is just for our audience. I mean, we know that some of these, you know, it's hard to exaggerate. This is just for our audience. I mean, we know that some of these, you know, USA aid thing were just so ridiculous. So I just thought the only way to escalate it

is to go to like what? But they're not that much of an exaggeration with some of these things. So there you go, folks. Try to laugh. Farog testicles. He really gets into things. The average circumference of a frogg testicle.

Circumference? $68 million dollars, your taxpayer money. Have we found this out yet? Is it that much of a conundrum? Will life go on if we don't know? Give me my puke bucket. I like the puke bucket. It is funny.

He goes, we spend, it's the bestest one. He goes, we spend $82 billion helping countries that hate us. Can we spend nothing? And they'll still hate us? I know all this stuff is slow motion country logic. We give away $1 trillion to organizations that want to blow up England, just so Trump can't call it the red, white, and blue land.

You know that's the name they actually want for Greenland? No. Yeah. We're gonna call it red, white, and blue land. We can brainstorm a better, I mean, Gulf of America, it's a little hacky, but I'll take it. But red, white, and blue land is really like third grade.

It's hard to say. Red, white, and blue land. Red, white, and Blue Land is really like third grade. It's hard to say. Red, White, Blue, Red, Red, Rippin' Blue Land. It's like saying, Sine Live. I can't believe for all those years I said Sine Live. Sine Live. I called it even more America. So that was my name for it. How about charge for it and call it America Plus?

Like they do on Apple Plus. 57,000 Inuit Native Americans from Greenland occupy. They don't even have a Costco. Yeah, they live in a very primitive manner. We can make them millionaires, and perhaps they do our bidding. Yeah. Okay, let's go to some stores or something.

Before it's too late. It's gonna take a shower because I'm like so gross. Are you going, what we'll talk about. There's something for Lorne and I, but it's also Rock's birthday. So it's his 60th birthday. So Heather, make sure I go grab my card from Thrifty. I'll go buy CVS.

Okay, hang on. Violent diarrhea bug is dubbed the Ferrari of viruses. Why would you call it the Ferrari? Well, that would be good. Why would you call it the Ferrari? This is CDC. You would say it's not violent. When I think of a Ferrari, I think of fast. The speediest of viruses.

The speed of your poop going through your body. Is that what they mean? Hitting all the turns. Ha ha ha. Pfft, pfft. Or we're still back with Kennedy. We're to figure out what to call the current diarrhea. Yeah. I don't know. I have nothing further, your honor. what to call the current diarrhea.

Yeah. For our, I don't know. I have nothing further, your honor. Did you know what I read yesterday that sounds fake? I don't even know what it sounds like. They go, do you know what COVID stands for? And the C-O-V, COVID-19? Oh, we can figure it out. Look it up, Heather.

Because, but they go, what's the 19? Well, we can figure it out. Look it up, Heather. Because, but they go, what's the 19 stand for? And they go AI. First letter is one. I is the ninth letter or something. And I was like, and they were like, woo. And you know, on Instagram, they have music like woo. Like they have scary music under it.

And I'm like, I don't know if I'm scared. I don't get why that's scary. They said COVID is AI. I'm like, well, I don't know about that. It sounds kind of scary. It doesn't really mean anything. The SARS, COVID SARS made it seem more dark. Oh, they say coronavirus, that's C and the V.

Coronavirus, hmm. The D and the V? The coronavirus? The D is for, hang on, here comes Heather with the rescue. It's not that riveting, but okay, we'll go to the next story anyway. With the Fizz loyalty program, you get rewarded just for having a mobile plan, you know, for texting and stuff. And if you're not getting rewards like extra data and dollars off with your mobile plan, you're not with Fizz. Switch today. Conditions apply. Details at fizz.ca.

The one that still kind of denotes really hard laugh for me is still the face tilted with the tears coming out of it. You know that one and then the tears are laughing. You get three of those, you're still happy, but you know. I mean, they have the straight one with tears. They have smiley. Right, but the tilted. That's a full seizure. But isn't it a little weird when you know what you said

or what you typed wasn't really that funny and you get like 10 like... That's when you know people are faking it. Yeah, fakers. They write back LOL, LOL, LOL, LOL. I say LOL, LOL, LOL as a joke of how stupid it is. Like I'll write something to someone and then I put my own LOLOL on it.

Like I'm like. Would you rather get multiple LOLs or 15 haws back to back? I know there was a study on this. For $4.8 billion, we found that people would rather get just an LOL. I would say many people, your experience, not mine, would rather have multiple ha's

because that takes more energy to do. Multiple ha's. H-A, H-A, H-A, H-A. No, here's a trick I do and I've probably done it to you. I text you something and no one says anything, so I put a ha-ha on mine. And so someone might accidentally think, oh, someone thought that was funny. And they're like, oh, it was Spade.

He did it on his own. I did this once just for fun, that everything they said, even if it was straight, I would just put a ha ha on it. I know. And they thought it was crazy, kept going, yeah, so we'll meet you at the movie theater, ha ha. Some people put LOL just awkwardly and it makes no sense. That makes me nervous.

All right, so I'll see if the movie's like, okay, LOL. And I'm like, what? Or heart seems a little too emotional sometimes. What's a gray heart? A gray heart, I have no idea. Heather? Gray heart? If a girl writes sends a gray heart.

What's purple? What's yellow is sympathy and roses it is. I don't know Heather does not know. I don't know what the D in corona. No she's still working on what COVID means. Coronavirus disease. Coronavirus disease. So where'd they get the V?

Virus. virus disease. So where'd they get the V? The virus. Oh, okay, for virus, covide. Covide disease. Newsflash, the flu that I got, influenza A, way worse than COVID. COVID, COVID bomb this week. When I had COVID, I had it twice and it was not that big a deal.

If you didn't tell me there's a national emergency, I wouldn't have noticed. It's the gray one. It's gray, you just had it. White Heart represents love support. I'm doing those all wrong. Fascinating. The blue one means I have blue walls, right?

Yeah. Okay, next one I have blue walls, right? Yeah. Okay, next one. What did it just say? Company offers 200, AI company offers 200,000 for rights to your face and voice on their robots forever. Would you do it? No, not enough, man. How about 20 million?

But what if you're a normal person, would you say? Oh, a regular person, they just like, they just like, but then they can have your digital copy having pornographic sex with a giraffe. I mean, what do you mean? Nope, we're not gonna tell you anymore. Just do you want the money or not? Geez, this is a toughie.

It's a tough one. I think most people would say yes, they don't give a shit. 200 grand to do nothing? Let's look in the comments. Is that net? Oh no, nothing's ever net. That's the thing. When people go, how much you make?

Net, I go, well, no one ever is paying you net. Well, you're paying net whenever you pay someone in cash. People love cash and that is net, net. Who are in cash, people love cash, and that is Net Net. Except for a foot. Who are you fucking, this guy's Net, Net and Yahoo over here. Because you say you wanted nets, they call you Net and Yahoo.

Okay, that's pretty good. I sound like Dennis Miller, Joe. They say you want nets, and they think you're like an amateur tennis player. This guy's got more nets than... All right, one more. Let's see what else is on. David's just having a banana. I'm having a banana in the middle because I'm dying.

Okay, don't play this yet. This isn't a good example, but whenever I see pranksters on my page making people look stupid, throwing like a ball in their head and then, oh, who threw that? Pranksters life is, I look cool, you look stupid, I make money from it. I don't love that equation, Dana. So this one is just a page of pranksters

where it doesn't work right. Here's one example. What's where you going? What's where you going? What's where you going? What's where you going? I hate to say it's funny, but what is the joke? It's a prank, it's a prank. So we got a prank.

And they always say it's a prank like anyone cares. It's a prank video, it's a prank video. It's a prank, it's a prank, we got a camera right there. We got cameras. Well then I feel like, is this a prank? we got a camera right there. We got a camera. We got a camera. Well, then I feel like is this a prank? This is a prank. You see the camera right there. They always go to like gang bangers.

Why would you trip? What are you bitches doing here? And everyone's like, what did you say? And then they go, hey, it's a prank. But these guys will either. I've seen two guns drawn. Yeah, he's trying to fuck with them. The guy could have broke his nose.

Right. He doesn't. They don't think it through. They just go, this will be so great if the guy. He tripped the guy. Yeah, he's trying to fuck with the guy. The guy could have broke his nose. Right, he doesn't, they don't think it through. They just go, this will be so great if the guy goes, hey. But a lot of people just go, I'll knock you out. You're trying to start shit. People have hard days. They don't need. Well, you're more trustworthy than I am. I'm not saying you're gullible,

but I believe the prank was actually, the guy who got tripped was actually in on the prank. Well, usually the ones I've seen, they connect when they hit, where it's... I'd have to see that again to see, because the camera was behind him. If they knew it was coming. Dana, are they trying to trick me?

That's scary. I would want to do, if I did it at Johnny Knoxville, and other people have done it, where you're just in prosthetic makeup, and you're like an old man or something asking for directions or something like that. He does that and he had his nuts out of his shorts, an old man, and he was going to outdoor patios

and he'd walk by slowly, and he'd graze it against their leg or table, and people go, what? Now, that was funny. Now that was hilarious, Now that was hilarious. And that's what you call a prank. Cause you know what? He's not an old man.

He's a very young man. But no one's getting mad. Cause they think he's an old man. So no one's going to beat him up. But exactly. It's a risky biz. All right. Another one. Hmm.

Okay. I don't know. There's people cannot always be trusted. Cannot always be trusted be trusted. This will bomb. Let's try. Why you can't always trust people. Once, Sony organized a focus group with their customers to decide the best color for their new Walkman to make its launch as successful as possible. Some voted for red, others for blue, but the yellow Walkman got the most votes. Yes. At the end of the survey, Sony thanked everyone

and told them they could choose a Walkman in any of the six colors they had just voted on. And guess what? Most people picked the black one. Yep, black. It's kind of interesting. So everyone said yellow is their most popular and then when push comes to shove, they got the free one and chose a different color.

Well, they're like, I don't want yellow, but I think that's what people would like. Oh, okay. And then they go, but it worked. Makes me kind of nostalgic, you know, when Walkmans came in or the first iPod and it was so primitive, you could upload a thousand songs on it.

The lo-fi world, there's a little bit of boomer nostalgia for it. People don't realize a thousand on an iPod shuffle was bananas, because you could only have an album with like six, eight, 10 songs, and you go, wait, all? And that was this big, or a CD, and you go, all, I don't even know how it works. We had a tech guy come over our house,

this is like 2003 or something. And he's doing stuff and he's really nice guy. He's actually a magician. He's always tricks for us. And then he kind of goes, Do you like do you like Apple products? Because I really I really like them. That's the only stock I invest in. I'm not a stock guy. He was just being sincere. It was casual conversation. But I just buy Apple stock because I like their products. And you know, he laughed and I just said, fuck that guy with his Apple stock bullshit. He's had an attitude.

And now he owns part of the Carolinas. And two islands in the Caribbean. It's one of those, one of those things. Missed it by that much. I missed it by, I got into Apple during rules engagement, me and Oliver Hudson, and then I got out. I can't always sit in everything. Even I buy a car, like an old car is kind of fun,

but the fun is buying and selling them. And so you drive around and you have your fun, then you go, all right, I want a different one to play with. Kind of fun. Expensive hobby, but you can always sell them for more. If you have a good one, it's super high quality. Yeah, then you can always usually, it's a push or you make a little.

I'll take a push. You just got something fun for two years. Right now, what would be a surprising car from the 60s that goes for a lot of money? Oh, those Hemi Kudas are a lot of money. They're over a million. What about a Chevy Impala, perfect condition? Oh, I mean, they go for, it's just, it's the rarity usually. So the bigger the engine, the more options they have, the color of the paint.

They have really cool stuff. So I still like a lot. I like old 72 trucks now. So now here I am on Instagram going, talking to these truck guys going, what she got under the hood? I like that old patina paint, green or beat up, blue or black.

And I wouldn't mind that. What am I hauling? But you know, I like them, they're cool. Everybody in my neighborhood, boomer flashback, had a Volkswagen bug and a friend of mine got a vintage one that was just in a garage, just untouched, like a 67 red Volkswagen bug. They're kind of nostalgic, you know.

The shape is a big deal, like how good a shape they're in. Just like coin collecting I used to do. Nerd alert, beew, beew, beew, beew. 1916D Mercury Dime, beautifully uncirculated condition. My brother, Brad, right, Bay Scarthun, tooks like this. He was a real coin collector and a science type kid.

So we had this fabulous coin collection with dimes and nickels and quartz, you know? And so Scott and I, we wanted some candy. It was Saturday and we needed money. We couldn't, we didn't have any money. So we went into his room, found his coin collection and took all his- Shut the fuck up.

And put them in a machine down by the puppet hound to get candy out of it. And someone found those coins later and it made the local paper. Oh, 1955 Double D Buffalo Nickel. That's something right there. But we got some jaw breakers with that. Jaw breakers kind of sucked.

Yeah, played fucking asteroids. Bing, bing. Shh. Played pong at a pizza party. Boop, boop, boop, boop. Yeah, something like that. Boop. It was one little thing going back and forth. That was great.

Pong was great. Yeah, yeah. I did see Michael Myers today, says hi to you. Everyone says hi, of course. We've been texting. Super fun. Yeah. That show last night, I'll just wrap up. I think the music've been texting. Super fun. Yeah. That show last night, I'll just wrap up.

I think the music show last night was really fun. I didn't know what it would be like. I came in during Miley, I love, and I missed, I just saw the end, because I was late. I didn't get to do the press line or anything. And then, but they had, you know, they had Will Ferrell and Anna Gass that are doing their thing.

I love those two characters. They were singing Kendrick. Yeah. It was great. They had Lauren Hill, who I'd never seen anywhere. Never seen her anywhere. Yeah. They, you know, a lot of people, what I noticed on the Saturday Night Live concerts, people went for it. Like, Jeff White really went for it. And Brandi Carlile is like kind of otherworldly.

And Gaga's obviously as good as you can sing. But, yeah. Gaga doing dick in a box was really funny. That was funny. But yeah, everyone really, man, Eddie Vedder, incredible. I mean, they all really went for it. Eddie doing Tom Petty was great. Committed. Committed.

Then he was gonna be like, he played a pirate in this little sketch thing, quickie. But everybody was sort of up for anything. It was really fun. There was a lot more comedians up there doing sketches and bits than I thought. And I didn't, yeah. And yeah, it was.

It was just fun to see. I thought it was two hours, so I left and it was another hour and a half. Yeah. Post Malone with Nirvana. Yeah. Adam introduced that. You know, you just, Kurt Cobain and Nirvana,

as time goes on, just get shinier and brighter where you just go- Of course. That was a moment. Those chord changes and those lyrics, they just sort of, it was grunge, but it just reinvented it a little bit of John Lennon influence or something.

But that Nirvana was huge. And it was Post Malone filled those shoes as best he could. He was amazing. Really, really tough. Yeah, it was super fun to see. I watched a clip this morning. I will tell you, Sarah Sherman was in that thing

with me today and she was like, I'll come on with you guys tonight, but we didn't finish in time. And she had to get back home to get on to do it. So maybe she'll come on next week when it's a little slower because she wanted to give us all the deets. And I saw Meryl Streep. I told you I sat in her chair.

So she's doing something tonight, which tomorrow should be great. It'll be fun. I don't know what the other is. It just should be funny. And let's talk about it again. Well, it's already next week. It'll be a week after that.

So it's okay. And good to see you. I will check in with you later and I'll take a shower after that, so it's okay. And good to see you. I will check in with you later and I'll take a shower because everyone's complaining. Have fun whatever party you choose to go to. Yeah, tonight's pretty mellow. Must be nice to have you dance card full. I know, I'm boy, you know, LA is, I don't do too much.

So it's fun to have a couple of things to do, but it gets a little bit of a grind. We had a late dinner last night. It was fun. I don't do too much. So it's fun to have a couple things to do, but it gets a little bit of a grind. We had a late dinner last night. It was fun. Oh, we saw Paul McCartney running around the stage today too, he's running around just sitting in the audience. I guess he has something, but of course you walk by

and go, oh my God damn. Right up there is the most famous guy on the planet right now. I feel like he's up there. I mean, Keith Richards, I saw his name in a sketch. So I'm like, I don't even know what he's doing. He was not there, but I'm like, I just love that he's in a sketch.

Maybe he's doing a cutaway. Everyone's pretty game. So good deal. All right, I will hit you later. Thanks, Daniel. Hit me up later. Thanks. Enjoy yourself. You know Dana. Hit me up later. Thanks. Enjoy yourself.

You know where to find me. This has been a presentation of Odyssey Superfly as executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade, Jenna Weiss-Berman of Odyssey, Heather Santoro and Greg Holtzman. Hope you liked it. Ooh. you