Fore Play - Bert Kreischer and a Tough Hypothetical

Episode Date: November 9, 2021

Comedian Bert Kreischer (00:59:08) joins the show in studio. A fantastic and hilarious conversation ensues. Before Bert, we discuss Viktor Hovland winning in Mexico, ugly Christmas sweaters, and a hypothetical offer for the Fore Man Scramble to join the super league for a lot of cash.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/foreplaypod

Hey, 4Play listeners, you can find us every Tuesday and Thursday on Apple Podcast, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Foreplay, presented by Barstool Sports. We have the entire crew today. I'm looking at Frankie and Trent in studio. We have Lurch, who's in New Jersey, it appears, based upon your background and the sloppiness of that room. It must be one that you habit frequently. I'm in Scottsdale, and we have on this show a huge interview.

I'm actually incredibly excited myself to listen to this. I don't know if this is the first interview that I wasn't a part of at all, but you three were in studio with one of the great comedians in the world. Bert Kreischer and all I've heard is that it went fantastically. Is this correct, gentlemen? Yeah, he was great. I'm a big Bert fan. I love Two Bears One Cave.

I follow a lot of stuff that he does. I've been following him for a while. So it was a true honor to have him in studio here with the three of us just chatting. He's a very easy guy to talk to. Pretty much he came in with two coffees in hand, ready to talk. We threw him a couple questions and then he just kind of ripped for 45

to 50 minutes. And I think we all had a pretty damn good time with it. Yeah, it was fun. He's, he can kind of just dominate the conversation. You know what I mean? He can just, he's the host when he walks in.

He sat in the middle. He's bouncing stuff off of us. It's where we are the passengers. No matter what podcast he goes in. Am I having a stroke with these lights? This is actually happening. We were having a tough time during. It's a nice.

It's a nice throwback to the Burt interview. We had a problem with the lights as well. So it's happening again, which is nice. Yeah, He's just a funny dude. You guys are going. You're brighter.

You're darker. What's going on there? He's just a funny fucking guy, man. And like when he laughs, it makes you laugh. And there's just something about him. His aura just, he's got it. He's just got it.

I mean, yeah, he dominates. He called his father at one point. To like, yeah. It's like he was offering up to call a few different people during the interview. Like, we didn't just trust him, like in terms of what he said. But it was just amazing. And he called his dad, put him kind of on speaker next to the mic and on it went. So it was the bird show for 45 minutes.

and it was a pleasure to be a part of. Well, I'm excited to listen. We obviously don't want to give too much of it away. This is going to come up in the second half of the show. But yeah, in studio. It's nice to have some in studio stuff going on again. We had Boba Watson. We got Bert.

It's nice. So much better. It's light ears better. It's impossible to do the same show over the internet. I mean, when they're here and they're in person and you're able to smack the guy when you tell a joke. And it's just so much. I mean, I was doing that to Bert. I'm like, you fucking believe this.

And he's getting into that. You're doing like some arm slaps? Yeah, I gave him a couple arm slaps, I think. And it's just, I don't know, man. It's so much better to be in person. It's just how interviews are supposed to go. We obviously pivoted to over the internet during the pandemic. The whole world did.

But I mean, there's no denying that the sauce is being in studio with the people because there's just a vibe that you can't generate online. We came in on a Saturday. So credit to us. Credit to us. We interviewed Bert on a Saturday. that was when he could do it and we came in and it was like I said people are going to hear it but it was it was a true pleasure I got a parking ticket outside for that did you yeah part you 118 bucks

you believe these fucking people oh mine 65 nightmare dude right in front of you're gonna try to I don't know if that no I can expense a parking ticket dude I think so really I don't know I am you can expense a certain degree of stupidity I would say but where that line is I don't know well I was kind of running late because I don't know why I was running late, but I was running late. Oh, there was just ungodly traffic coming into the city on a Saturday. You know, sometimes they do these things where like only one lane's going to be open. Can we have a serious conversation?

When you are late, which you've been late every once in a while. Yeah. Is there actual traffic or do you just leave? Oh, dude. Long Island traffic going into the city is ungodly. You can, you can admit. There's always more traffic when you're late, though. There's always more traffic.

No, dude. Because like, I'm not an idiot. I know when to leave. Right? So, like, if I know it takes me 50 minutes on, like, with no traffic from my house to the city, I'll just, like, plan for that. And when I, I plan to get here around like 10, 45, 11 o'clock, the interview was at 12, right? 1130. 1130. So I plan to get here like 10, 45, 11. So I left around 10. I'm like, oh, I have more than enough time. I know. Maybe I left. Yeah. I left around 10 being like, I have more than enough time, right? It's 50 minutes usually.

I think you got here like 11.15 or so. But once I get on the parkway, it's like all of a sudden, the numbers changed. It's the only place in the war in the war. world where the GPS changes. Like, you can search it. Like, what is it right now? And then when you're in the car, it goes up. It's the only place on Earth, Long Island, New York, going there from my house to New York is the only place where the numbers go up and set it down.

They constantly change. It does suck when you're driving somewhere. You're actively going in that direction and your ETA is going up. It's like the most frustrating. It's like, no, I'm working. It should be going down and it's like increasing. The new thing now is that you get a little notification saying, seven minutes have been added to your trip.

And then it's like, so that kept happening. And what happened was they closed one of the lanes to the tunnel. And you don't know that until you get up there. And I'm pretty sure the tunnel closed right when I got up there. All right. That's good to know because there's been a trend where you are, you are late to things and you say it's traffic.

And I thought you were, you felt the need to lie to us because you're like, these guys just think I, I don't want them to know that I left late. Bro, it's traffic. You can tell us anything. It's traffic. Okay.

I you know actually I took a picture I took a picture of traffic the other day show me it look at this let's see that picture 3.9 miles away from the office what does that read 43 minutes that was the day that's absurd 3.9 miles 3.9 miles 3.9 miles could someone run that faster 4 miles under 43 minutes no problem oh yeah yeah yeah yeah no problem I mean what are we doing here Shouted to New York City Marathon was this past week It was great That's true

Yeah 26.3 I think the winner was 208 I believe So this is 3.9 I mean this is a breeze This guy can be there and back He can go get you a work coffee

And come back I wouldn't say Everybody's late at times But I do think Frankie you're You're late More than the average person I would say

Yeah I run late I run late I don't think that's an unfair thing to say No, but it's not like I'm like late all the time, but when I am late, it's usually hectic. It's usually hectic. I would say that I'm late. Have you ever baked traffic into your timing just in general? If it's always longer, then like you should just always leave earlier than that.

But the problem is it's so inconsistent or else I'd be late every single day. It's so inconsistent. My problem is when I am late, it's usually because I made a misjudgment on like something like that, like travel or it's not because like I'm sleeping in or I like didn't want to go or like I was just lazy to not leave the house on time. It's always like there's always something that I made like a miscue on when to leave and like I'm doing stuff leading up to you know what I mean? Like it's always like why did I do that? Why did I leave it this time?

I could have just left 20 minutes earlier and now I'm feeling the pain. So I do have to be better on like baking things in. There is nothing worse though when you're looking at the clock. It's like going up or you know you're gotten it close. That's when the traffic starts to get the heart read going. Like that's where you like these fucking, they don't get out of the way. You have no, you can't do anything about it. You have no, I can't do it.

You're looking at alternate streets. You're looking at like ways to go around. I'm looking like, oh my God. When you start moving around the map and you're in traffic and you're seeing if side roads get you to the same place, that's when you know that you're just in a bad spot. You're in a bad spot and everybody's been there and it's the worst feeling in the world because I'll even go almost in the wrong direction as long as I'm moving. Like if I'm dead stopped, then the world stops.

and I'm irate. I'm livid at everybody I'm looking at it. I would rather have it take a couple minutes longer and me moving the whole time than be just stuck in traffic and get there like two minutes earlier. 100%. 100%. Yep.

At least you're doing something. You're doing something. That's why sometimes like if I'm going north from New Jersey, I'll go way west of the city, knowing that it's going to take about, it's going to be a more consistent timing to get to Boston. Like it might take me about five hours where if I went through the city, like I can get there in 4.30 with no traffic,

but with traffic, all of a sudden it becomes seven because nobody's moving on the merit in Connecticut and it's the biggest nightmare in the world. So, yeah, you can't happen. I would say that was probably the biggest factor for living in Manhattan when you work in Manhattan is at least you always have some control. Like even if it's a 20-minute run from your apartment or something,

like you always have that option. When you don't live in there, you can just get completely fine. walked. Right. Like I know from my apartment to the office is a 33 minute walk no matter what. I can get there in 33 minutes if I have to. If I'm feeling lazy and I take an Uber, sometimes it can take longer depending on traffic. But I know if I leave, if I have something at 1230, if I leave at, you know, whatever, 1130, I'm easily going to be there in enough time. 33 minutes door to door for sure the only negative it's the worst place on earth so it's like you know your time from door to

door but it's also the worst place on earth like like it's not the it is though it really is dude like it is for how expensive it is and what you get and like the just just how insanely packed and disgusting the city is for what you like it should be a luxury it should be a luxury it should be a luxury of a home buying process the way he's talking about it right now you know I just can't imagine people are living in little rooms for like what I'm going to end up paying for like a mortgage. It makes me sick to my stomach that people live like rats. Like I get it.

There was a video that $4,000 a month. Like it's just fucking insane. Over the weekend there was a video that went viral of like juice from garbage getting squeezed out in the back of a truck. And people are like, oh, that's disgusting. Yeah, it's a bad video. But then like the tradeoff is like I can have ice cream delivered in my apartment whenever I want.

You can't. Dude, I had a McFlurrie brought to my door on Long Island, East Meadow, Long Island last night took 12 minutes. He went to the fucking McDonald's. There was no line, I guess, and he was at my door in 12 minutes. Faster than I think the city. But I would argue, though, like Long Island's better for that. Like Long Island, you're still in some degree attached to like a big city, a big city field.

People are used to big city accommodations. Like, you do get into most parts of the country. And it gets dicey trying to get shit. You can get it delivered, but it's dicey. It's slow. You don't have that many options. Maybe they close down at a certain time after 10 or 11, it becomes tougher to eat. there are advantages, but I would also say, Trent, like I was a big fan of, I believe, like,

you know, Lurch and I lived in Boston for a long time before. We would always be like, yeah, I could go visit New York, but I can't live there. And then you move there and you're like, oh, actually New York's great. I really like it. You start talking about the positives. Once you then move out of it after living in it, I think that you look at it as the worst place in the world and you can't believe that you justified it for a while, in my opinion. Just when you compare it to other things, it gets sickening.

when you compare it to I think the city is great Like being back in it now I was in it But it's After our bird interview I stayed in Had just kind of a day

In the city It was great And I was like Oh my I gotta get back in the city Um But yeah no I mean

I don't know Riggs You've settled into The Scottsdale lifestyle It's lovely out there I will say That's just another Great place to live

Despite the summers They're just unbearable But I like The city Yeah T Like your point of You can get An ice cream delivered

I wouldn't even say it. You can get anything you want within 15 minutes if you live in New York, like anything, which is the difference of like you could be at a Broadway show, then you're in some basement bar that you don't even know what's happening in there. And that's why I think the city's so cool. And there's just a blend of all kinds of people in there, all different ways of life, which is the city. Like you get outside that and then you just find your own kind of like group that lives in that area.

There's one thing that Trent doesn't have that I know he really misses, is driving around in a car. Oh, I do miss that. I really do miss that. Listening to music in a car is the best way to listen to music. When new music comes out, I get in the car. Yeah. Is it great listening to it when it's pitch black because the studio, I guess,

through the lights just turn off. These lights apparently now have a mind of their own. We never try and fix them, though. Like, it's Pete. No, it's like whatever's happening and they don't give a fuck. Yeah, I know. It's crazy how much darker your guy's room is than when it was a minute ago. Like when I go home to visit.

I think I just threw Pete under the bus for that. I don't know. I mean, sometimes, I mean, you just got to throw someone's name out there. These lights are, yeah, they're unpredictable now. We got some in-house stuff, some in-house announcements to make. Before we get to that, we're going to talk about the Owens. All right. We like Owens a lot.

Owens really good. You guys got it. I even got a little transfusion logo. Hoodie on, which is coming out Black Friday. We'll talk more about that. But Owensmixtures.com. All right. These guys just figured it out.

You pour the shit in with your favorite liquor of choice. You have an awesome cocktail. Everybody likes a nice cocktail. If you like to drink, you definitely like a nice cocktail. You like new cocktails. You like to learn about different stuff. We got tonic water and lime. Okay, we got grapefruit and lime.

We got margarita mix. We have our transfusion mix. This puppy's all over golf courses here. I was up at Grey Alkitten balls earlier. Car girls driving by. They say they're slinging these things left and right. People order them all the time because they're delicious. They're quick.

They're easy. You don't have to guess, right? Nobody wants to guess on the proportions. You pour four different drinks. They're all different. They all taste different. They have different levels of grape juice or ginger air or whatever. You don't have to worry about that with Owens Mixers.

They're consistent and they're very simple. And then Owensmixtures.com, you can go check out the store locator, pick a store. Go pick it up. Put it into your drink with liquor and you have an awesome cocktail. So big thanks to Owens Mixers. Okay. So midhouse stuff. We've got this morning, Tuesday, when you guys are listening to this show, 8 a.m.

Eastern, our ugly. sweaters are going on sale we got some great ones this year i got this puppy right here oh yeah that's i really like that premium oh absolutely premium it's crazy how good that fucking sweater is yeah that's a really good one and and and sometimes like you're you think it's going to be that old school christmas sweater wool where it's itchy and it doesn't feel right there's something about this material that it's the most comfortable thing i've ever worn like when we put that on me actually because like you know i get stuff i don't get much stuff like as you guys get being in the office and whatnot.

But I got my hands on a couple of these sweaters and I was like, oh man, this is not what I expected. Like I thought it was going to be that like crunchy pull it away from your neck type sweater that's like don't put it on my body because I can't call your chin off all day because you just. Right. Exactly. It's super comfortable. And they're just funny to like they're great pieces of clothing.

Like they're just fun to wear. They're so comfortable you could wear them to bed. I'm not even kidding. You could wear that sweater to bed and you wouldn't feel a difference. It wouldn't hit you at night. I usually wear to bed, Frank. What are you usually wear to bed? T-shirt and Tommy Johns.

Like a white tea and Tommy Johns. Is that weird? Anybody else want to offer up there? Their sleeping attire? I don't wear anything. Okay. Of course. I go about, for whatever reason.

I go about naked half the time, I would say I go naked. Yeah, I'm probably right up there too. Tommy Johns. Nice pair of those silky Tommy Johns I wear. Yeah, it's either a boxer briefs or nothing at all. yeah so i and sometimes i sometimes i sometimes but everybody's doing it yeah you don't ever go you don't ever go birthday suit yeah i mean if i like it depends on if i come out of the shower and i just go right in there and then i get really tired but half the time like after i get a shower i'll walk

over to my dresser i'll put on tom and john's t-shirt watch tv and then like i end up falling sleep like that you know i mean yeah like i'll like whatever i'm wearing to go get water by the water cooler or whatever like that's what i end up falling asleep in Another sweater that I love that's on sale now is the Santa elf one where the elf is helping him read the green. Yep. I worked on that for a long time. It's a really good one. Yeah, it was hard to get that one right.

And I think we nailed it. I think we absolutely fucking nailed it. I like Santa doing things. We're getting into the Christmas spirit. We've talked about this a lot on the podcast. Look at that thing. That one, yep. Santa and his elf are reading the shit out of that green and just, I mean, Santa's stance is so perfect.

It's, it's immaculate. That's a really good one. Yeah, it's a real. That's just like, that's something that you want to buy because you want your friends to see how cool that ugly sweater is. Everyone struggles on finding an ugly sweater that's going to be a conversation piece. That one for sure is going to be like, oh, fuck, look at that thing. Where did you get that?

Because it's Santa reading a green. Like it's, it's ugly. It's boy, man. They're just trying to get the line right, trying to get the speed right. That's something that I would definitely buy if I was just in a store, like last minute shopping going for an ugly sweater party. Like I need to find something that's going to make, make people. talk, that's the one.

So Tuesday, 8 a.m. Eastern time. That's probably already occurred and happened that time in, in, you know, this world that we're living in if you are listening right now. So go store dot parcel to sports.com, check it out. And then Black Friday, we got, I'm starting to get a bunch of our shipments of our Black Friday stuff, getting a little tease, putting some teasers out there. Just be ready for Black Friday, Cyber Monday. We're going to have a lot of cool shit. So be prepared for that. And then November 23rd is our target date for.

our band and dunes travel show. I think we have five episodes to come out. A lot of people have been asking about that. They're hungry. They're excited. November 23rd is the target date for those and we'll just rip those right through the holiday season. So get geared up and get happy and excited and all that about that.

And then so tomorrow or today when this comes out is 20% off, right? Yep. So just don't make the mistake that everyone makes and not get on this when it is 20% off. And you're going to need ugly sweaters. I don't want to move past the ugly sweaters until we. really hammer that home. You're going to go to parties this year. Right. The world's, it's happening. I last year when we did this, you know, parties weren't happening. Right. Ugly sweater parties are happening. You're going to be getting together with friends. You're going to want to wear something super

festive with all the colors and you're going to stress and you end up running a marshals the night before and you're going to be trying to find something orange, I mean, orange, red and green and you're going to try and find an Elth hat. You can go orange if you want. But my point is, just don't make the mistake that I've made all these years where I just wait into the last. minute. I don't get the thing I want. We're offering these awesome ugly sweaters that are going to make you festive and we're giving them 20% of get them now. Don't make that mistake, you fucking idiot. Ryan and Jeffrey and Alyssa. I'm talking to you. Like just fucking do it. Brittany. Brittany, you've been fucking slacking all these years, Alex. Alex, you've been a slack your whole fucking life.

You just sit there and you wait and nothing comes to you. Now it's time to grab life by the balls and fucking buy something. Just do it. Jingle balls, you know what I mean? Yeah. I'm not going to say a name. I also think. I'm not going to say a name.

You're not going to say a name? Well, no, because then I think we'll just be here all day doing that. So I'm not going to. Or you can say a name. Now I think we're waiting on you to say a name. What if you said a name and we're just infinite names? I think there's infinite names. You won't join in on this game saying name.

You won't say one name. No, because I think, no, I think it's a slippery slope. You think the only, so you think the only ending to this is that it just never ends. You don't think that you say one name and it's just over? No, I think there's a lesser chance. There's a lesser chance that we keep going if I don't say it. I'm telling you if you say a name. We'll drop it. I don't trust you. I don't trust you. That's crazy. We'll drop it right now if you just say a name. You're crazy. No, you won't. I don't think you can help yourself. I'm going to start saying names until he says a name. Penelopee, Bobby.

Stewart. Patricia. I'm not giving into this. I don't care of you guys. I know. I can't get off the peas, dude. And they also try to make up for the P. Christopher. Christopher. Gabriel. I think it's 20% only for today as well. It is.

Enrique. Emmanuel. All right. Michael. Matt. Victor Hovlin won in Mexico. Is that count? Victor.

There you go. No fun. Before we get to Victor, I golfed this morning, first time with the elbow. I wanted to test it out. Shot 40, four over nine holes. Not bad at all. Played really well. First hole, you know, we played on the back nine at Rockville, links.

First hole is a par three, hit a nine iron to the center of the green, just missed the birdie put on like, I'm back, baby. Next hole driver, driver hit right down the middle, hit a fucking hybrid to the right side on a par five, missed the green with like a pitching wedge. But like, man, I was just back in it, swinging super slow, like cautiously slow to the point where the super there, Luke was like, man, that's like your new, like, that's the swing right there. So you're doing abandon.

and you were swinging that way in band. That's the pocket. We've always been telling you to swing slow. Yeah, no, I know. And I think that it's still raw. Like right now I play, I played nine holes because I know we have some golf coming up. Like end of November and December,

we're going to want to schedule some things. So I'm like, I have to play. Rockville's the place I go on Monday mornings. Had my dad out there, had future and father-in-law out there. It was nice to get out there. I mean, fucking 60 degrees this morning. Really nice. I mean, can you think of a better time to play golf with the fault,

with the leaves all on the ground? It's got that fucking feel. And in the morning, Luke was like, I'm going to hit you up if there's frost on the ground and you might not be able to come. I woke up, it was like 55 degrees at 8 a.m. Like, can we go?

Any leaf rule? Any leaf rule issues? You know, we didn't lose a ball in the leaves, no. But I saw that we posted something on Instagram or Twitter on for play of a guy walking around with a leaf blower and he's just walking around looking for his ball. It's a really good move. Really good move. Not all that practical, though.

Well, if you have a cart. You have a little mini leaf blower, you know, one of the little electric ones? That's no problem. That's no problem. That's true. I hadn't thought about putting it in the cart. Throw in the back of cart. I don't know.

You pack a cart makes it a lot of. I mean, the cart, I was with the same boat as Trent. I did not. It didn't even come into my brain. I was also picturing one of those industrial ones where you put it on like a backpack. And then they're not. No. And it looks like,

it basically looks like a flamethrower. I don't know if I've ever done any real leaf blowing. We used to just rake them back in the day. But I don't think I've ever done any leaf blowing. Actually, it looks fun and satisfying. you wouldn't believe how much faster it goes unless it's a windy day then it's the most frustrating thing of your life

then you can't if it's windy on top of the leaf blowing you don't do anything I've done some leaf blowing at Porelli's we did like the patio it's nice it is that it is satisfying yeah if it's dead because then it yeah it's it's one of those like

satisfying videos you see on Instagram where it's just like you go back and forth and just have I watched a guy today at Rockfield do a T-box it was under a tree and I mean and the fucking tree just destroyed this teabox with with leaves and he was going just from back to front slow left to right and it was just luscious green tea box appearing underneath all these crinkly old leaves it's like watching somebody wash a window yeah or like doing the ice at the

zamboni yeah you know just clean very satisfying um victor hovlin so look i think it's pretty clear none of us are gigantic fall golf pGA tour guys it's just not that exciting and i don't know how the hell you go from major championship every month, Rider Cup or President's Cup, and then you're supposed to get jacked up for this golf. Occasionally you get a sweet leaderboard. We had, you know, Rory was battling it out a few weeks ago,

and you get a little bit excited about that. But overall, you know, I'm very unlikely to be flipping off of football or not going on the golf course when you get a nice day in the fall or winter or whatever and flipping on golf. I would say from like into September through what? January.

It's hard for me to really care. about a lot of professional golf. You think that's fair? Yeah, I haven't watched golf in four months. I don't know. Yeah. I mean, like I turn it on. Like, Rory's winning,

you throw it on? You think I'm watching Victor Hovlin charged down on Sunday? I mean, I had so much shit going on yesterday. You wouldn't believe it. I mean, if you thought I was rearranging my day to watch that fucking golf tournament, then you don't know that.

You don't know me, and you can probably stop listening to the podcast because I'll never watch that. Ever. Yeah, I couldn't agree more with you. And again, if you're, if you're one of those guys, if you're even like Victor Hava's not a fringe guy, but if you are one of the more fringe guys,

like this is your time to shine. You get a lot of the big dogs are not in the field. So the strength of fields a little bit less. Get out there, try to rack up some FedEx Cup points or cash or money, whatever, totally understanding that. If you get a really cool leaderboard, a couple badasses or a couple interesting stories going neck and neck and they're battling out for a title.

You might get me to flip it on. I'll watch a few highlights on Twitter or something, but generally exactly like Frankie's saying, I'm not flipping off of almost anything else or I'm not changing my plans in the fall to be watching golf. I think in the future they're probably going to rearrange a lot of this.

It sounded like from who gave us a little tidbit. Oh, Bubba did. Yeah. A little tub butt tidbit that like in the future. A little tug butt. Let's put a pin on that one.

Tud butt. A little tut butt. Kind of blended tidbit and Bubba in the same word. I don't know. I don't hate it, honestly. Tud butt. A tut butt. about the future schedule on the PGA tour.

And it sounds like they are going to build in more of a break at this period because people just, for what we're talking about, it's just not that exciting. I doubt they get any ratings. I don't see a ton of fans out there. And it is what it is. Having said that, you know,

Victor Hovelin gets another win. It's interesting. You know, he moves to top 10 in the world. He's ranked 10th right now. And it just, it feels, you know,

I was trying to, it feels hard to avoid the fact of like, Every month, it feels like another one of these young guys is the top dog. Like he's got three wins now. He's got his smile. He's got his whole vibe. I was looking, it's like Rahm, Morikawa, DJ, Cantlay, Zander, J.T. Bryson, Rory, Louis, Victor.

That's the top 10 in the world. And it feels like, again, it's hard for anybody to get a ton of, like, separation, especially out of that younger crew. I mean, Victor Havut's only 24 years old with Morikawa and Wolfram. But he's sort of already, you know, kind of adding to his resume. And it feels like when somebody else is ready to take over, Morikow wins a couple of majors, Victor Hovlin's got three wins.

He had a great performance at the right of company, but they lost. So it seems like he might, you know, I don't know. It's becoming tougher and tougher, I think, on a week-to-week basis to really find one that stands out much over the other, which we're really used to in the world of golf. He feels like more understated than the others, though. Like, you know, if I was going to rank the other,

it's like, yeah, he's, and even when you said, 10 that kind of shocked me as well like I didn't think of I don't think of them as that high in the world but it is crazy how just the top 10 golfers in the world are everybody's young it feels like and it does feel like well who's next shout out to louis being on that list that one that hit me like a ton of bricks when I heard that name all the other ones are in the conversation that we're talking about and louis is just in the top 10 I think he was nine if you were listening to him off an order what I just did not expect him to be there surprised me a little bit too when I went through and then also not, you know, because he had that, it's like he finishes second every tournament.

It's like almost amazing he's not number two in the world because he's fucking right there all the time. But yeah, the rest of those names, I think Victor, when we were when we were a couple months ago, I think he was 13th or 14th in the world. So clearly this is, you know, when you get a win, you vault up there. Speeth is 11th in the world. I know he got to top 10, I think, in the last week or two, despite not even playing because the way the points shuffled or whatever. But, but yeah, you know, you've got a little bit of a shuffling going on. up there, I mean, Rom, I think, is clearly number one.

And then after, I mean, if you went, Mordecau, Dustin Jotts, and Patrick Cantlay, Xanderthoffly, Justin Thomas, Bryson, New Chambor, Roy, Roy, Louis Hustace, and Victor Hovland, I don't know any one of those. I'm going to strongly bet on over the other any given week. And John Rom's probably the only one that really stands out to me as, like, clearly having separated himself this year from the rest. So just something to, you know, kind of nibble on going into 2022, if you like to do that kind of thing. Tiger Woods So we got a little bit of update Since the last time

And again I don't know This comes with A ton of credibility It doesn't It was from Tiger Woods Spot account

That we have gotten into Before and Frankie had to issue An official apology to Watch that tone You know They don't like that They don't like

When you question Their sources Their credibility Yeah no They bullied the fuck out of me I had to apologize Yeah to apologize So

TWW spot on Twitter posted, as this was late last week, as some other reports have indicated in recent weeks, have been hearing some rumblings with regard to Tiger's recovery, including that he has progressed to the point of a resumption of some limited golf activity. And then he went on in the follow-ups to that to say and go through, when Tiger emerged in late 2017 for his most recent comeback, that he, I believe, posted like a video of him chipping,

And that was kind of it. And then all of a sudden, like a week later, he hit like a full stinger, two iron or something was a video he released. And everybody kind of went crazy. So he was trying to kind of stack it up, see if it's going to stack up to that and kind of, you know, whatever, guessing on what's going to happen. But the main takeaway is that things continue to sound like they are progressing towards a Tiger Woods return to the world of golf with absolutely no timetable whatsoever. Yeah. A four play update, actually, in our DMs.

So someone sent us a video of Tiger Woods swinging a golf club. There was no context clues to when it was filmed or anything like that. It was a screen recording of someone's Instagram story. And the only thing was like in the top right, it was like 328, like in the afternoon. It was like Tiger Woods swinging at Torrey Pines. So we didn't post it because there's no... That's not true, though. I was with Brendan that day.

And like, first of all, Torrey Pines is a public golf course. Tiger Woods's his first time on the golf course is not Torrey Pines. And also looked like he was on a range and it was just like a grass range. So that just was not true. It couldn't have been. All of this stuff is no pun. It had to be debunked. Yeah, that's fine.

I agree with all those points you just said. Imagine him just, yeah, he's at Eisenhower tomorrow tomorrow too. And that's the only video is somebody DMs it. Nobody else saw anything. All of this stuff and the pun I was going to make is all this stuff is foreplay. Bang. Until we actually see the video like Riggs is talking about where he comes down. Make me clean, baby.

Where he actually puts a video up of himself swinging a golf. golf club hitting a chip hitting a putt or whatever all this stuff i'm enjoying it i'm having a good time with it i think everybody is you like for play but i do but the real deal when it actually happens what's your favorite for play come on let's not do this every up and i'm kind of interested it's been a big couple months for you t daddy i'd like to hear some things you know i have no comment okay up until that point when he puts out a video of himself it's all it's it's just a lot of heavy Petting. Little mouth play.

Who? Okay. Heavy petting is kind of bad too. Heavy petting? That's not. That's just the example that I use. That's not innocent. For the video or the reports that we're hearing like T.W.

Spot, that stuff is heavy petting. It's heavy petting and, you know, grabbing and touching and tugging. Awesome. You know what I mean? Heavy petting. Do you agree? Yeah. Yes.

Yeah, it's heavy. Wholeheartedly. Wholeheartedly, I agree. But I also would say, you know, I mean, I don't think anybody, I don't know. Like, I heard Joe Likava spent the whole week with him a couple months ago, and he came away being like, I have no idea what his takeaway. Like, I don't know, you know, nobody can get a sense of what his, what his recovery's like, when he can really play again, if he'll play again to the point where I don't think he knows. But if there's rumblings going on, usually where there's, you know, smoke, there's fire. in these kinds of situations, and it's proven time and time again that even though Tiger's incredibly

tight-lipped, usually the way the reports kind of come out, it tends to go that way. So whenever he's like, I'm not really sure what I'm going to play. And everyone's like, no, we're pretty sure he's going to play this tournament. He usually plays that tournament. So if things are coming out that's that are, you know, all trending in the same direction, if he allowed things to come out and didn't like refute them, you know, when Charlie Hoffman and Steve Stricker and these other folks over the last few months, Ricky Leaks have come out and said that I think Tiger's really focusing on a return to golf. He's working on rehab with his golf clubs next to him, et cetera, et cetera. I think all that's going in the same direction, which we are very excited about.

Speaking of Joe Likava, you want to talk about how much of a five-tool podcast we are? And what golf podcast are you going to find where Joey Likava, the caddy of Tiger Woods, text the golf podcast host. Hey, I've got some family members that want to go see The Bachelor. show live in New York City and see Trent do his bachelor show. Oh, the chicks in the office in the office. I mean, Joey La Cava reached out to me, said, can I get, you know, my daughters and her friends are huge chicks in the office fans. Can we get them in there? Trent got them in. The VIP access, met them, the whole thing. They had the time of their lives. Joey's like, they had the time of their lives. Thank you so much for this. He's like, I was thinking to myself, man, we're a golf podcast.

He reached out to us to do this Chicks in the Office show. It's just Tiger Woods is catty. I met them afterwards. They were, they were very nice. nice. They had a great time at the show. Yeah, I had, I had forgotten about that actually. Yeah, it was just a total total what the fuck type moment for me. You can't put your finger on us, man. You can't put your finger on us. I'll get them into the show, man. No problem. Yeah. What are we doing out of it? Yeah. They came. They did the meet and greet before where Rian and Fran meet everybody. And then afterwards they came and, uh, you know, we talked for 10, 15 minutes and they had a great time. You text Colt nose for a fucking sleeve of balls. He texts us to get into a fucking chicks in the office show. Five tool, man. Five tool. You know? It ain't just golfing. I like you're getting your shots in at Col. I thought you loved Colt. I do, but I like to give it to him because he like, I don't know. Isn't he like a guy likes to, like give it to people and take it?

He likes to riff. He likes to riff. Just take it, baby. Let me give it to you. I think Macanudo. I got to talk about how excited people get about Macanino really quickly. I got this whole box of cigars. This kind of, let's do something for you guys.

Let's get you a little bit. Reds are a little more intense for my liking. I like the whites, but they're a hell of a cigar, man. They are a hell of a cigar. Yeah, the orange label, as we call it, is, a little spicier. You're right, Frankie. It's significantly,

so the white one's a little smoother for folks. Oh, I love it. But McEnuto, they've come on this year and been a big supporter of ours. I, you know, admittedly was not a huge cigar guy beforehand. McEnuto has dramatically changed that. Just enhances the day. It makes it cool.

It makes it fun. And just adds a little more spice, a little more excitement, a little more thrill to the day when you throw a macanudo cigar in there. So do yourself a favor. You can enter to win a limited edition branded golf set and a hubidore. humidor for your macanudo inspirato smokes at macanudo.com slash barstool. You've got to be 21 plus for entry.

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add to your repertoire if you enter to win a limited edition branded golf set and humidor for your macanudo in Spirado smokes. It's macanudo.com slash bars. So you've got to be 21 plus to enter. They smoke macanudos and sopranos. Get your fucking macanoodles. Is that what they said? Yeah.

My dad respects me more now than I'm a cigar guy. Is that right? Yeah, he's a big cigar guy. And I sent him a bunch of maconudos. and then when I was back between the Vegas trip and the Ryder Cup, when I was back home, I stopped back for like a day or two, smoked a couple of mac and noodles with him. And I could just,

he didn't outright say it, but I could feel that he was like, this guy's all right, you know? I was in, you know, it's been 30 plus years and, you know,

it's been touching go. You never know exactly how they feel. But then when you're sitting out on the porch, smoking the car with him. Finally proud of my son after watching the weather come in. Just, you know, this guy's not that bad.

Yeah, he's like, all right. I accept this guy. as my son, which I really appreciate. It wasn't always clear, but today it is. No, it was not always clear. Macanudo too, I think, has always left me with more of a celebratory feel about my round, right? Like, no matter how it's going, you could play horrible, you could be feeling down on yourself.

You get a macanudo in your hands and it feels like you're celebrating something. It feels like you're adding a little bit of positive connotation to the entire experience. First thing we did when I broke 100 was we smoked maconudo. So, yeah, they are. They fired them up, baby. I got an interesting from the gallery that ties into a lot of things. Foreplay at barcialsports.com. You could submit these and we'll read them, debate them, talk about them on this very podcast right here called Foreplay.

So we were talking about the Greg Norman situation last week, the Saudi League, tons and tons of money being offered to players. How do you balance that? How do you weigh that with obviously one's moral objection to Saudi backing in their history and how they treat people? So someone submitted a few different people submitted things similar. So I kind of combined it. But I'm going to take Andrews who said, if the new Saudi Golf Super League offered each four-play member $10 million for the next five years and the four-man scramble competes and films exclusively in the Saudi-backed league,

what do you guys do? $10 million each? $10 million each person. I'll see in Saudi Arabia. Per year or just? the whole thing. Right. That was my question too.

For five years. So $2 million a year. Yeah. We exclusively, four man scramble competes exclusively, films exclusively and does our whole

and we compete. So we could win too. I'll be in Saudi. You just find me in Saudi. Yeah. Yeah, but part of, when we talk about

the four man scramble competing in these tournaments, it's because of the people who are also in the tournament, right? Yep. So like, the way that's going right now,

there aren't a lot of guys jumping over to these Saudi leagues. So it's not like we're going to have the same sort of cachet that we're getting if we were, you know, to be in a John Deere classic, a prestigious tournament like that. But Trent, I don't know that our cash matters

because we're making, we each, I mean, we're bringing in $40 million for the boys over five years. I, look, the point I think we ain't making that in Iowa, dude.

We ain't making that. We're not making that kind of cash now. Clearly, there are moral, ethical objections to say a rate, but people have a price. I think almost every human being on Earth on Earth has a number where if you, you know, that number is going to outweigh their objections to any Saudi back stuff. And I think if they offered each one of us $10 million over five years, I think you, at some point, you're like, all right, see you later. You know, I don't feel great about it, but guess what?

I then can bank $5, $6, $7 million after taxes and all this. And I'm set and my family's set for a damn long time. I'll use that time and money to expose the government over there. And like after my five years, I'll be. Don't think that's going to go great. I'll be a fucking hero. That means you don't even get to enjoy the 10 million years. I'll be a hero, dude.

It doesn't mean I have to back the fucking government and what they believe in. The reason I brought up the tournament thing is because I was trying to figure out a way to say no. Because otherwise, that's a lot of money. So basically this person is trying to expose us to say that everything we said about Greg Norman is like we would just do the same thing? Yeah. Okay. No. I mean, I think they're essentially trying to get to the point of it's not, it's, everyone can sit there and say like, oh, there's bad backing and horrible ethics behind it.

So I'm just out. But clearly, anyone who wants to throw stones at the players and on that, if you are put into a situation similarly, it's there. are understandable reasons and ways that human beings would make a decision to be like, you know what? Sometimes I got to look out for Numero Uno and my family. And if I can get X amount of money and be set for generations, I would be crazy to say no to that. And I think that that was essentially what the, you know, the submission of the question was trying to get to.

And I think it's a good thing to get to. It's not like every person that is considering saying yes or playing in this league is some horrific person. Like, I just go fucking play golf. I'm not killing anybody. I'm not supporting anybody. killing anybody or doing horrible things other people. I'm just playing golf.

And if they're going to pay me an outrageous amount of money to go play it here, here, and here, then I'm just going to do it. And if people look negatively on that, I can't help it. So I think it's quite interesting to think that if we were offered an outrageous amount of money to exclusively do our thing,

YouTube videos, podcasts, whatever it is around this, you know, uh, uh, uh, sketchily and, and,

um, problematically backed Super League, there's probably a certain number that would make things really, really interesting for us. Is 10 million enough? Yeah, for what? For what we're talking about? Yeah, but I mean, like, enough for what?

Like people being like, that's bad money. Jason Bateman took a lot of money in fucking Ozark. You know, you got to do what you got to do. I think you're probably right, Frankie. To the point, like, I get McDowell, like, jump, if he were to jump over there to the Super League, Like somebody that's at the end of their contract, but for, that's like life-changing money. So I'm just going to be over there.

And then it also answers the question that I would love to know is like, at this age, how good of a golfer could I be? Like, could I ever get to scratch with 10 million guaranteed and just doing podcasts and things like that? Like, it would leave a lot of time to just be over there hitting golf balls and practicing. Dude, what I like to see that contract cut down to three years instead of five? Yeah. we're out here expensing like airport lunches for $13 taking pictures of fucking receipts you don't think I'm going to take $10 million dude like every time I buy internet on a plane 1795 I expense the shut out because I

have to dude you'll you could you'll you probably won't fly I mean you'd fly first class everywhere with 10 million I just think we could get more than 10 why don't we talk to him I'll hear anyone out about cash yeah I mean we we we'll negotiate with him you fuck kidding me like that you're talking about and you don't have to live over it. Like, they don't play in Saudi. They do like maybe one event a year in Saudi Arabia, but they're going to be all over the world this week. Like, I think you live wherever the hell you want. The issue is that it's, the money is coming from the Saudi regime, which is clearly the problem and their bad history. But again, everybody, I think almost everyone

on this here, the planet earth has a number. They offer you a certain number. I think almost everyone has to be like, all right, yep, I got to do that. If you really want to go into it, all this money's dirty. Every dollar you get from these big country, all these big companies, you know, Apple and Walmart comes in. They stick their Walmart on top of all these mom and pop businesses. You're just going to take their money? Like what happened to all the fucking people they ran out of town? Big Walmart. I mean, Apple, they've done some fucking weird shit over there in China, building all these

fucking iPhones for all these years. You kidding me? You're just going to sit there at the fucking genius bar and take their cash? Yeah, I'll listen to just say a name. Just give them a name to buy an ugly sweater. I'll listen. I mean, that's not bad what I'm saying. It's fucking Peter. If you fucking dig deep enough, you're going to find a lot of shit. Stockmarked all these fucking wet hairs Facebook's going through right now. Facebook the guy.

Meta. Meta the guy's talking to the fucking Congress every fucking other day about all the weird shit they're doing with people hacking into our Facebooks and changing all the way we think. Stop getting into my brain. I don't disagree with that. No. So my point is if you dig deep enough, you're going to find shit no matter what. All this money ain't clean.

So I'll listen, man. 10 million? you kidding me over five years? If you think at any point in my life I'm making $2 million a year clear just to play golf, you're fucking insane. So I'm taking this and running.

T, you're the only one that's been on the fence. Like, what's your number? No, I would do it. Oh, you care about humanity? Just kidding. I care about humanity. No, I don't have any penalty. Totally.

I know, but I won't cash, though. Bad. I mean, I've been on. If you really wanted to get into it, like, you could be, you could totally be like, well, any money in the United States. Like, there are certain.

parts of the country that are certain parts of the world that look at all the money we make and think that we're evil for that. So it's like you really could get into it. I've been on this podcast. I've been on this podcast for begging Kevin Kisner for $1,000. You guys don't think I'm going to take $10 million. Yeah, I'm going to take it. Yeah.

So again, we're not supporting that, but we are very much trying to showcase, I think, that we're aware of the fact that people can be put in really tough spots when a ton of money is on the line. And you can't necessarily blame everybody or call everybody some evil. scumb bag if they're willing to take a life-changing amount of money to go play golf or go do their job somewhere. Sling TV. If you love watching live TV and you're tired of the high prices, it's time to take control of your TV experience. It's time that you got Sling. It is the place where your favorite channels like NFL Red Zone, ESP and MTV, and much more are all together for less.

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having our channel, you get your first month, 10 bucks, you go to sling.com slash barstool. Okay. I think that's it at this point. Anybody have anything else before we throw it over to Burt

and get a little comedy going? The lights come down from up top. I mean, look how good my fucking drawline looks on my face. You know, this is how I have to look all the time. You see that? Yeah.

Isn't that insane? You've been looking better in pictures recently. I told you that with the light. with the Bubba picture I think you look good thanks to Lurch we all look good in the Burt Kreischer picture

I look bad in that picture I look Holy shit you enormous That's a bad photo The lean in My guts out That's a bad

How'd you push your stomach out like that? I don't know man But it's like am I that fat Like I'm a square Like do you not do the suck in For a picture No I don't do it No dude they're photos

It's like this is me Like but No Yeah you got to you got to like suck it in. Yeah, you're saying like, oh, it's a picture. This is actually who I am. No, every picture that goes in the internet these days is not who the actual person is.

Yeah, no. Yeah, well, for me. That'd be like saying, why do you, like, why do you even smile for the photo then if it's just a, like. Because I'm generally a happy guy. So that, that's consistent. But yeah, but do you just walk around like this? Pretty much. All the time.

Nobody does that. He kind of does do that, actually. Yeah, pretty much do that. Every, I'm always amazed. And I know we've gone over this a million times with the way it looks and pictures. But I am a. bigger guy. I am. Right. I'm a Midwest like, you know, broad shoulder, big belly, whatever. I'm a bigger guy. But whenever I'm standing next to you in pictures, I look like a regular sized human being.

A little baby. Yeah, in that picture with Bert, I look like a very regular size human being because Lurch looks so massive. Yeah, I don't know what that's about. I looked. I looked, yeah, a little bit tall, but I was square. I was rectane. It was not, it was a, it was a, it was a bad photo out there. So whatever, on we go. Aside from Burke, because Bert's such a great fucking podcast guest. Like, he's just built for podcast guesting. Yeah, he is.

Who's your top, who's your top three podcast guests of all time that you would want? Not golf related. I mean, it could be golf related. Jesus. I know. This is not really a question. Larry David would be, I think, number one for me. You think you'd care, though?

I saw KFC tweet about this, because, because Bill, Simmons had fucking Tom Hanks on. And that was like, holy shit. So then KFC was right in list. And he wrote that he would like Larry David because he'd probably care more than Jerry Seinfeld, but still wouldn't care at all. But I think Larry David's been on Bill Simmons before or someone's show, Colin Keating, or someone's show.

And he actually was pretty good. So I'll give you that one. The thing with Larry David is the first 10 minutes would be him being like, I don't care about being here. But then after that, it's a normal conversation. The hardest questions to ever ask someone because you'd really have to think about thoughtful, insightful questions where you're like, are this guy's going to fucking walk out on me if I don't ask him good stuff?

All right. So you say that. What do you got, Trent? I mean, yeah, Tiger for this show would be. Yeah, that's what I was going to say.

Really good. Tiger in an atmosphere where he'd be more open than he would be on a normal, you know, media outlet. Because if you get Tiger in Tiger, you know, PR mode, you're not going to get anything. But if you get Tiger where he's like, all right, I'm open to answering some questions. He would be a must have. Yeah.

If we're doing non-golf, I might, non-golf, I might say Steve Carell, just because I, you know, like I'm such a fan. I think we're all such fans. Just like, it would be almost like when fucking, what's his name that plays the CEO, David Wallace, when he came into the office, I was like Starstruck because you watch the show so much. So I came in imagine Steve Carell. Steve Carell be fantastic. In that same vein, I'm going to piggyback off that one, probably Will Farrell.

just because he's been such a part of my life forever and everyone's life. He was like one of the first guys. I mean, Chris Farley, RIP, but Will Ferrell after that was like, he was like a comedy god. He still is. So he'd be on my list. How about you, Frankie? Dave Grohl.

Okay. Without a doubt. Just how he's navigated those waters being the drummer for Nirvana, and the best bands of all time, then starting food fighters. I mean, come on. That guy is just, his story's telling is insane. And then second I'd probably go Kim Jong-un.

I think that'd be a big one. Yeah, that would do some numbies. I think that would do some numbies. It would be nice to know what's going on in that guy's brain. See if we can get him back. You have any questions? See if we can get him back to Earth a little bit. Boy, that's not a name I thought was going to come up.

No. I'm like reeling over here. Like for a second I thought I heard like of the name wrong. Like I thought you meant somebody else. But you mean the leader of North Korea? Well, yeah. I mean, why does every interview? I said who's your ultimate

fucking guest on a podcast. Why is every guy have to be like some funny dude in a comedy? I'm talking that would change the world. You'd be like, you'll bring any nukes? No,

I just like, I mean, I would do what the country needs me to do. I would fucking ask them the questions that need to be asked. They made a movie about it. You're going to research? Yeah,

they made a movie about this. Yeah, they literally made a movie about this. Yeah, Seth Rogan and fucking. Which, Seth Rogan might be my third one. I'm a big Seth Rogan thing. Good one.

The universe is actually a pretty good movie. It is. It's good. I think this one might surprise people, but I think Taylor Swift, I would love to interview Taylor Swift. It's very surprising. I just think she is such a fucking megastar and she's always got like, she's always popping up in headlines about battles with her own music. She writes her own music. Like I just think she would be a really interesting person to enter into her.

Sim. She's a great artist. I know. I remember. she's actually really honest she used to fucking hide in luggage just to go from her car to her house to her car

they used to carry out fucking luggage and give me that shit on this show you know how fucking interesting that would be I'd love to interview Taylor Swift I'm trying to think of a real one well I remember when I was still

with Robbie Fox he asked me one time who would be the most star struck who would leave you the most starstruck if they walked into the office because we've had a lot of people come into the office and at a certain point you don't ever totally get used to it but you see famous people

and you're like, that's just a really famous person. And the answer I gave him at the time was Eminem. I don't know if I would necessarily want to. Great one. Maybe a great interview. But I think if I ever saw Eminem, I would be the most starstruck I could possibly be. That would be,

I can't believe I'm looking at this guy in the flesh type moment. Right, because I did. I'm a big 50 cent fan, obviously. And I met him that one time and he wouldn't shake my hand. He was like, get away from my car, which was totally fine. That's kind of how you want it to be. Wasn't he getting like a macha drink? No, he was outside by the matcha place.

Okay. But he was in his Rolls Royce. But that was Leo that used to go into that Mata place a lot, right? We had this little Macha place. It was called like it had a chacha macha macha. And there was no one in our office even used it, right? I think we all went once and we're like, it's not that good.

And I remember they're just being all these ridiculous celebrity settings at it. Shack, Leonard DiCaprio. I'd love to see that, man. Yeah, but see, Shack's more mainstream than these other people. Like, they're, I mean, they're all megastars, but like, you've seen Shack's on fucking T&T every week. So, like, you can hear Shaq talk. Like, I would love to hear fucking... Right.

Eminem doesn't do interviews, really. Right. Yeah. And, like, not to pump another podcast, but I loved hearing Tom Hanks talk about, like, him going through fucking movies. Like, he was talking about Castaway and fucking Forest Gump and big and splash. And you're like, what the fuck?

This is crazy. This guy's just describing everything that happened. And, like, how some movies didn't almost make it. And how he... It was pretty cool, man. And, like, and they asked him, like, all these endings. Like, the ending of, um, of Castaway. like does he actually go back like to you know like the ending's very like is it ambiguous ambiguous i was

going to say conspicuous but that's conspicuous girl right yeah um permiscuous you let's go to bert man you know yeah that's how you got to end it because that was a good i like conspicuous girl that was a good what does conspicuous mean it's you're like um conspicuous girl conspicuous standing out so as to be clearly visible all right attracting people. Right, you don't blend in. Or no. I don't know.

That kind of works too. Obvious to the eye or mind. Yeah, they're like an interested party that you're like intrigued to know more about it. I don't know. There's like, but it's like a negative connotation too, I feel like. Right. I was going to say it's almost like you're like sketchy. Like you're sticking out in a sketchy manner, I would say.

It's like when my buddy Rob said full belly red at a date at a date. You don't take a full belly red please? that's a conspicuous person did you give do we all get a big conspicuous movement yeah well think about it

are we ever gonna do one of those segments that we came up with eight months ago we've done a few but not many I think we've done one segment

and it was the what would you take out of golf the cut line or whatever I would like to do the history once or twice that was about it I'd like to do the format the the foursome one

we'll we almost sort of do that with Bert and then we he just he just leaves it aside. Like we each give one, which is very bird, if you watch two bears. Like, he's like,

all right, let's do dream for some. Yeah. And then we each said like one. And then we never revisited it. We just kept plowing through. Oh yeah. We got to get to the interview.

It's a good interview. I really want people to get to it. They're probably done listening to us fucking talk. I will say it's just, it's been tough to get anything really segments because it's like we're going to throw it to Bert. And it's like, who are your top three inner guests in the history of the world?

We weren't going to do a segment right there. We were ready to go fucking drink matcha. I was just trying to give people more It can be tough to get stuff in sometimes So that's why there's a reason We've got a ton of segments It's not allowed to say that I can't say that. Half the time we fucking talk about

Because we don't have anything else to talk about If we have stuff to talk about Then we won't talk about the bullshit Give me the fucking segments Let's go Frankie wants the segments I love those ideas Let's go

We don't have to talk about my fucking elbow anymore I'll talk about fucking foresums We're gonna throw it to the interview Here's Burke If you see an alligator on the course the goal isn't to be the fastest but to not be the slowest, which is true. Yeah, that is true, actually. Who's slowest in this group for sure?

Who do we think of this? I think I'm second. You think you're second slowest? Sorry, second fastest. Okay. Are you thinking it's me? It's either you or Frankie. Bro, I ran on the four by one team in high school.

You saw me, sneaky quick. Riggs is fast. I know Riggs is fast. You saw me run lurch. You ran after me on the green once and you're like, wow, that was, that was surprising. You've seen me run. That's true, actually. I think it's all pretty, I think it's all pretty, I mean, I'll take it.

I'll probably the slowest, but I don't think it's by a long shot. Well, you're getting eaten if you're the slowest, so I'm just, that's why I run it up. I don't think it's clear. We might all four be sneaky fast that they show. The next time we're all together, we should absolutely race. We're definitely racing. Okay. Let's do a race.

I think Lurch wins. No, Riggs is fast. I'm pretty fast. I'm pretty fast. He's fast. The Lurch has those fucking strides, man. Are we talking 50 or 100 yards? No, it can't be 100.

That's insane. Maybe 30. No, 50. 40. Why did you skip like the common one? 40. Because I'm, I need like, I've got a slow third gear, but then I can pick it up that like 30 to 50 is when I started to hit my group. Really?

That actually really surprised. I thought you were looking for a 15 yard dash or something. No, no, no. But like then 70 I tire out. So I just like, you know what I mean? It's got to be a sweet spot. We're not going to pick, well, I'll tell you this. We're not going to pick the one that's like your sweet spot.

We're just going to pick a number that like the 40 yard dash is how you usually. Right. We'll do 40 because then everybody can compare. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because like if you pick five yards, that's my sweet spot. I'll beat everyone. Trifecta keeps you lean so you can outrun your foursome if needed. So whoever it seems like, according to this ad read, whoever's, you know, most committed to the trifecta diet from here on out is probably going to win this race.

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Did you get that from the... Did you go to the roastery? No, that's the thing Seguer did. What the fuck's wrong with you? The high-end one where you go in and... Are we rolling right now? No shit. No shit. We're recording the podcast? It's in New York City. We're rolling.

Are you shit? Are you sitting around the block? Well, I think there's a bunch of them, right? No, there's a roastery. There's the spot. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's, uh, where's the place, the high line where you can walk around. Isn't it over by there? I don't know where it is. Lower Westside. I know that I've never been there. New York's changed so fucking much.

We did a fucking pizza review there. They have pizza inside. Can I tell you I just did Caleb Presley's show? Sunday conversation. And he introduced us to high noon, and we end up drinking them all day after that. And I think it might have affected my show. I literally think it might have affected my show. I heard not only was it Caleb Presley.

It was our guy Glennie Balls who introduced you on him. Jesus Christ. What's the over under on him, 35? All right. So we're rolling right now, right? All right, we've got Burke Kreis from the building. It's an honor. I'm a big fan.

I'm a big two bears fan. Oh, thank you. Very excited to have you here. So did you just get to New York City? We just pulled in like a couple hours ago. You said New York has changed so much. What's changed so much about it? I was trying to explain to my assistant Peter because he's never been here.

And like some things are the same, like the homeless guy is bleeding from his head. Like he hasn't left. But like other things, other things like it seems like there's so many more high-end shops around here Then when I worked here, I worked right around here in the garment districts around here. And there was fucking nothing. There was nothing. You were always like everything was a little bodega. And now it's like there's a fresh press juicery.

There's a clean. Everything is like healthier, it seems like. But then I'm not even thinking about the pandemic because I'm like, how many people left this fucking city? Well, that's the thing. All the like so where we are, all the shops around here, everything closed. The thing next door, the Panera across the street. Like everything went away, so I think things are starting to come back and they might be the higher-end variety. Ah, I like that.

Is that called, is that called, what's that called? Gentrification. I love it. I love it. Do people not like gentrification? I don't know. It feels like a bad word. It does seem, it seems like a word that you shouldn't enjoy.

It seems like an elitist word almost. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, it's like a word that's like, okay. Let's do, let's do some words that probably. Words that get you canceled, okay? No, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no. No, this will be false.

Words that you hear, people say, and you go, like, I'll tell you a word that you're not allowed to use, meritocracy. Okay. That is? It's like the talent rises to the top. Yeah. And it, like, flies in the face of critical race theory, I think. So you're like, when you hear someone use the word meritocracy and you're like, oh, that makes sense. And they're like, no, you're a racist.

You're like, okay, never mind. My bad. My bad. That's right up there. I followed this guy. I'm in my bunk today. and I'm watching this guy, and he's like a fucking right-wing lunatic, and then I was like, fucking, let's see if any of my friends follow him, right?

So I go, he follows me. Oh, no. I'm like, Jesus Christ. I think another word like that is patriarchy. Patriarchy is a big one. Patriarchy. Anybody else want to offer any up or we can move on to something else? I got nothing for you.

Look how scared we get. I just want to stay out of everyone's crossing. Right, you just push to the back of the room. You do that Homer Simpson into the bushes? Yeah. So you do this whole, you're on a tour bus, yeah? How's that life? Do you enjoy that?

I love it. I love it more than anything. Last night, this is what I love about it, because it's just comics, and all we want to do is giggle. And last night, someone, they put streamers up all on the bus. I'm not going to do this justice. They put streamers off the bus, and we're drunk and we're high. And someone said, and I said, Who put up the streamers?

And they go, well, we, I meant something. Now, the kid bought something else. But finally, we got him back to get streamers. I go, what did he, did you walk in the bus? And it was a bunch of women yelling at the top of your lungs and their lungs. And you were like, I meant streamers, not screamers. It was silly, right? That lasted for 30 minutes.

Yeah, until I said, did you walk? Could we get up going, did you walk in the bus? And we were in our bunks. It is fucking four in the morning. We are crying laughing And we're like Did you open the door And a bunch of people

We're just selling handbags A dime bags of marijuana And you're like I said screamers Streamers Not misdemeanors And then I said Was it just a bunch of thighs And you're like I said streamers

Not femurs We could not stop laughing about it And that's my love about a bus That's just what it is all the time It sounds like a locker room on the bus It's just funny Well we have a girl on the bus for the first time Okay

How's that going Amazing like I and I told her last night that I didn't think it would be because I was like I just don't like I don't want women around because I want guys always I want guys it was me and her at the end of the night back and forth back bunk to front bunk just could not let go of this joke yeah and then this morning she woke up with a brand new one and and we were I mean it's like I love it I love it but it's her too she's also hilarious Rosebud Baker and she's opening for you she's opening Shane Torres is and his choose Trejo. Okay. Yeah. It's a way to see the country, right? It's amazing. It's amazing. So during the pandemic, I did a thing called

I created a tour where you do drive-in movie theaters. Yeah, I remember that. And at first I think everyone thought it was a bad idea. And some people did it and did not like it. Like, Seguer didn't like it. J. Leno didn't like it. A lot of people didn't like it. I loved it. I loved it

because you got to see the country in the middle of a pandemic. And you got out of your house. And we stayed it K-O-A's like where you pull in. Yeah. And we saw some of the most beautiful parts of this country. And it was like a slice of life where you're like, you're not going to get that again. Like where the roads were wide open.

Right. People were coming out and they were being distant and they were like pulled their car in and they, they hadn't gone out in a while. So they'd set up like a literally campground in the back of their cars. Everyone would get there at six. The show didn't start till nine. Right. They start pre-partying.

Tailgating. Smoking. Tailgating. That's awesome. Because no one had anything. to tailgate for so like granted i think the shows were probably less than part um love it but uh but but and i say that because you know you're in a rock quarry you're in a sure you're in a you're in a parking lot in philly we did that where the vet used to be we did like 2,000 cars and that is

less than ideal for comedy however if you haven't been out of the house it was so people just all the only email i got was i was so grateful thank you so much for doing it and we were we We all got in the bus. We stayed in a bubble. No one left our bubble. And no one got COVID. And it was fucking the greatest experience. It was the greatest experience.

Yeah. And we saw you were at Lambo recently. So we were just. So we went to the Rider Cup. We went to the Rider Cup at Whistling Strait. Stop, stop, stop, stop. And then it's like an hour away. And they were like, hey, we set this thing up for media if you guys want to go.

And we're like, fuck yeah, we'll go. It was like an hour and a half drive. And everyone's like, do we really want to do it? And I said, do we really want to do it? Of course. We're about to go to Lambo field. at night where with no game, it's just going to be us in the lights and the cold Wisconsin air, and we're going to walk through the fucking tunnel of Lambo Field and you don't want to do it?

It's a cathedral. Oh, my God. It's that morning I woke up and I realized, I didn't understand that I was playing, that I had started playing arenas. I just didn't know. Like, and then I get there and the, I think it's the Bosch Center is like where the hockey team plays. And I was like, oh, fuck, I'm across the street from Lambo. Yeah. Like I'm, I just figured I'd be in a theater downtown somewhere, Bosch,

bounce theater and I was like I'm gonna go take a jogger on Lambo so I get up I put all my workout clothes I get a coffee start walking over and I'm like I was like this is fucking Lambo like I'm on the outside right uh groundsman groundkeeper comes up to me he's like yo bird can I get a picture I'm like yeah of course I start keep walking and uh a truck full of Green Bay Packers going to practice I see them and I go and am I mad I'm like oh shit it's the Green Bay Packers you know like I'm still a hot moment and they're like machine I'm like, shut the fuck off. This is Russia.

Then I get a text from Aaron Rogers. He's like, where are you? And I'm like, holy shit. Dude, it was the greatest fucking day of my life. Ending with, and I know this probably sounds horrible now, but ending with Aaron Rogers sitting in my tour bus for an hour and a half, just chopping it up, talking shit, having a good time. And, uh...

Oh, what? Yeah, it was ultimate Packers experience. Yeah. It was the ultimate pack. Not to mention we saw Lambo. Not to mention we saw Lambo. But like the ultimate Packers experience. It was so fucking fun.

And then he gave me a jersey. He signed it. I was texting with him last night. Holy shit. Dude, it was the greatest experience in the world. Is it crazy that there's houses like right next to her? Like someone's backyard is Lambo.

So I, we were thinking you have that house. You obviously just, it becomes a party house. You can't live there, right? Well, unless they're one of those assholes where like they don't, you know, and like big businesses coming in the one house is right in the middle. Are these people like try, are they out there just like having little picnics with their families and like ignoring Lambo? I'm sure the packs have offered them millions of dollars to move their home. So I don't know.

Yeah, I guess it's certainly a party house on Sundays. Because when we used to Buck Stadium, all the houses that, that were around Buck Stadium, the old, the sombrero, they were all just like parking lots. Like they'd rent their house out game day. And then I was like, so if you have a house there, why not set up like almost like a little like party place where every. Everyone can come in and, you know, you can party, you grill meat. Family Airbnb. Yeah, open up a fucking taco truck. Like, I mean.

Trying to a business on Sundays. Right. Yeah. Do you, do you get to, so it's obviously a golf podcast. Do you get to play a lot on the tour? Do you put that into your tour? Like, do you want to be able to experience different courses? Do you like golf at all?

So, no, by the way, I'm a huge golfer. A huge golfer. I just got done surgery. So I haven't been able to hit, hit any clubs yet. But the first time I'm going to swing a club. is tomorrow morning at Fenway. What? Yeah, they're letting me hit golf balls at Fenway.

It's like a pitching wedge out of the... No, I don't know. I think it's like a top golf experience. Oh, my God. Sometimes they do that at sports games where they like set it up with different targets and everything like that, so they must be doing that at Fenway. Yeah, they're doing at Fenway, and then that would be the first time I swing a club again.

But, um, so during the pandemic, yes. Right. But what was, what we were doing was we were just getting balls because we were in fields. We were in, like, huge, huge fields. So we, and I, and I played over at Scottsdale National. Yeah. And so I got, and I got fitted for PXGs. Okay.

So I had these PXGs, and I had gotten fitted by TaylorMade also. So I had tailor maids and PXGs fitted for me, but everyone was hitting them. And we were crushing balls in the middle of fields and just, and like, we get practiced balls and just, and then go fine, see if we were fine, but usually not. So speaking of, you had surgery, right? Yeah. I just swung, I had an elbow surgery. We saw a video last night. It just took my first swing yesterday.

I was nervous. But how long ago did you get elbow surgery? A month. 25 days ago. Dude, I want to talk to you about this. Wait, hold on. What did you get? I got ulnar nerve transposition surgery.

It's your funny bones. So my fingers were going fucking numb. I couldn't feel my fucking fingers anymore. You're going to get me a fucking pain. My elbow was, my elbow was a nightmare. They say that you can get this injury as simple as just driving a car. Like your elbows. Or you fall asleep on a plane like this.

It goes into, oh, I just hit it in his fucking ring. But what he did was he held a pizza review camera for four years. I was filming a day morning for five years. So it's like this. And it's just fucking went numb. My hand went numb. So they go in, they get the nerve, they move it. I'm an idiot.

And I just listen to you on your podcast that you were saying that you think that surgery is a little bit more serious than you thought it was. And I'm in the same boat. I didn't take it seriously enough. So, at all. I would say you're still not. You know, Gabby Reese and Laird Hamilton, right? Yeah. So Gabby called me after I got out of surgery.

She was like, hey, I'm worried about you. And I was like, why? I go, I'm fine. I'm not drinking. I'm just out of surgery. I'm good. That's the solve all. Yeah, yeah.

If I don't drink, I'm fucking superhuman. Like, you, no one can keep up with me if I don't drink. I'm like, I'm on a different fucking level. I swear to God, I swear to God, I, when I don't drink, I wake up like a million bucks. I'm annoying as fuck. I am like, I'm a pain in the fucking ass. Yeah, dude, because your brain's like, finally. Thank you.

Now we can work. I get healthy as shit really quick. Yeah. And so, and like, I shut. I remember on my 40th birthday, the month leading up to my 40th birthday, my wife's like, why don't we take a month off of not drinking your home? Let's do a cleanse. I lost 12 pounds the first day.

12. Day? Fucking pounds the first day. I was just doing a cleanse. By the way, today I'm going to go do a juice. I'm going to start a juice cleanse after this. coffee and I'm doing Vino November so I'll do wine but I'm gonna start a juice cleanse it rips off me when I don't eat like shit if I just can you know what's why lost weight

the original time I'm getting back to your inquire answer it's okay um the original time I was just doing Xanax and Ambien just offsetting them and just not eating just sleeping and I lost I lost like 40 pounds in a month and still lost the weight loss challenge but yes so Gabby Reese was like, hey, just so you know, when they put you under, they're technically killing you. Right. I was like, really. I remember the guy saying to me when I got out and he was like, I coughed and he went,

oh yeah, cough it up. And in my head, I was like, I have sensitive lungs. Like, I can't be around vaping. I'm not going to be around vaping, but like, but like, uh, I like if one of the, I can be around like a jewel, but if someone's like hitting the one that goes, I end up feeling it. And so I caught. No joke. I had a nagging cough for three months.

Because I felt like I was getting all that shit out of my lungs still. And it was like what I needed to do is run and I wasn't allowed to do any exercise. Right. But it fucked you up, man. I was, I really, I'm the fattest I've ever been right now. And it's all because of that goddamn surgery. Right. Because I couldn't use my arm.

The depression was involved because you're like, you're panic, the trauma. Like when I got out my nerve did you have a nerve agent on your arm where they block your nerve They didn't do anything so what did what surgery did you have exactly like I ripped all the tendons of not all them Over half of the tendons off my tri off my trials yeah that's a real search yeah and so and it had retracted I did it in Serbia filming my movie right and I did it like a month month and a half before my surgeries because I know I'm not getting surgery in Serbia for Christ sake no offense Serbia but I don't think you want it there either and and they had retracted into my arm so they had to pull it down and it was just and they gave me a nerve block and I went to got home that night after the surgery and I couldn't feel my hand and you ever meet a guy oh it's my

agent he's talking about tickets for UFC tonight you ever meet a guy who goes yeah man I lost feeling in my arm and I just cut it off and you're like why would you do that I know why you'd do that it is when you couldn't feel your hand it is fuck that I was panic attack all night because they're like you should get feeling in six hours six hours goes by nothing 12 hours goes by nothing 17 hours and I'm like I'm cutting the arm off

Is the nerve block because it's so painful If you were to feel it so they're just like you don't get feeling why it heals They were like they were like trust me you want the nerve block And the guy goes trust me if it lasts for like Two days call us and then we'll be concerned But he goes but he goes If you can get it to like for two days, you're a lucky man.

And I went, really. He goes, it'll wear off. It's going to wear off. You're going to be fine. But, you know, two days, call us. But if you get two days, you're a lucky man. And I was like, fuck that. And then it started in the middle of the night,

I started being able to like, because you can't move your hand. You're saying to yourself, move your hand, and you can't move it. That's so fucking weird. You're going like this, move. And then you're going like, screaming at it.

Yeah. And then it starts to wear off. So is it something in your brain? They actually block the idea. They block the nerve in your back. Dude, I was finding a video. How do you put it in? He put it in and I was filming a video.

My arm went like this. And I went and it collapsed. And I went, and I was like, oh, cool, I'm getting movement. And then I'm like, feeling it in my, I'm feeling it come alive here. And then I'm like, nice. And then it goes to my elbow. And I'm like, searing fucking pain. I'm like, oh, I want that nerve block back.

And my, but they wouldn't give me good pain pills because they knew who I was. And so they were like, nah. Dude, I know this guy. He's old dude that he just got his leg taken off and he says he could still feel his fucking toes Right? No no bro. I'm telling you no leg says he can feel his toes his toes are a brand He's got him in a box he's a brand new surgery something about your brain like you have to get used to not having a leg like he got some Lymphs and yes he feels itching thing he feels an itch on the bottom of his foot and you can it's nothing there. Yeah it makes you go fucking insane. Yeah that's a different level of insane You think about, like, I think about

Tiger, since this is a golf podcast, you think about all the surgeries he's had. Yeah. Like, that dude has destroyed his body. Like, destroyed his body. And I respect the fuck out of that. Like, you go, like, you look at, like, fucking Greg Norman, he's still scuba diving.

He's like, fucking living on a yacht. He looks great. He's having cocktails. Huge cock. Yeah, part of me goes, you didn't work hard enough, buddy. Unless you're tiger hobbling, like hobbling onto the fucking knee shredding. He's going to do two canes, you know, like moving around.

Dude, dude, okay, let's do this. Best foursome that you can play with. Pro foursome. Has to be pros? Not current. They can be retired. I have that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Okay. Okay. Look, whoop's great because it gives you a lot of information on your body. So you might think, you know, you might have a little bit of a feeling how your body's doing, how recovered you are, how much sleep you're getting. but you don't really know you don't know how to optimize it you're not sure what's better for you exactly when you should go to sleep when should you wake up should you try to be doing this or that a little bit better whoop is the answer to all of that um i was laughing with some friends this past

weekend as at a wedding in austin having a nice time and we all decided to look at our graphs and they're all incredibly similar from your recovery over the week and it just goes green green as the beginning of the week starts to get a little bit yellow starts to get a little bit yellow and then, you know, Saturday, Sunday, you wake up just a dead person. And then again, Monday after a nice sleep Sunday, you kind of have a full recovery. This whole thing gives you, and they give you push notifications now too about, you know, what time I get a nice notification. It's like, hey, in the next hour or two, you really should try to get to bed. And it just helps you. It helps you kind of keep your body at the highest performance rate with all the things that you like to do in

your life as best as you possibly can't. My graph actually exposes me for how lame I am. My Saturday and Sundays are high in the greens because I just like sit and don't do anything. I just like drink a lot of water and I get good rest. So my Saturday and Sundays there, I mean, one of these looks like it's 91%. So I had a, you know, I had a pretty good weekend in terms of sleep. I got eight hours and 19 minutes of sleep last night. That's the best part of whoop for me. Now that I know or it tells me how much sleep I get every night, I cannot even imagine

not knowing how much sleep I get because then I really do base my day off. Oh, Riggs got eight and a half. hours of sleep last night. That's really good. Crushed it last night. I'll say it's easier out here because we're two hours behind. So it's like Sunday night football is over by nine o'clock or whatever. Oh, and we've got daylight savings going on now. So I didn't make it, I fell asleep at 10.28 last night because my body was like, we usually go to bed at 1130. So now it's happening. No more sunsets after 5 p.m. That's a nightmare. Well, Riggs also just entered the time where he's two hours behind it. So you change from Pacific time to Mountain time. That's why I have.

Arizona, it's like just pick one. Arizona just doesn't, no, they just don't do daylight savings. Arizona's stance is like, how come you guys are all flipping your clocks and shit around? We're the only ones doing it. We just, whatever the time is, the time is. It's amazing that. What is they part ways on that? Because it's just annoying for like meetings and all the, you know, stuff that normal people have to do over the course of the day.

You guys are just out. They're probably looking at us. Like, why aren't you guys doing what we're doing? 100%. We didn't change anything. Like, we're not changing anything. Whoever was first is right in my head. No, you guys had to be first because you guys are the only ones changing things.

We like, actually I would say Arizona was clearly first because everyone was just living all the time. And then the rest of the world was like, we're actually going to just, we're going to one day. We're just going to change all of the clocks in the world for half the year. Everyone's like, why the fuck are you do? Right. But why is Arizona allowed to be the only ones that don't do that? Because they've taken a stand. So they're just pretentious douchebags.

The conversation around these states always is the conversation around 49 states. and they're the only one, 49 other states are literally just adhering to the rules. But the conversation surrounding these dates is always like, why do we still do this? And Arizona's way back up in the corner being like, we don't, we don't do it anymore. Does that make them like right or wrong?

What do you think about that? You like that that they do that? I would prefer if we, you know, if the time always stay the same. And I don't like it where we're at now because if we head into winter, it gets dark so early and it's just yuck. I hate that.

So you like that one state, that doesn't do it. I think they've made a stand on something that's important and that I think everyone should follow, yeah. Doesn't affect you, Frankie. You could just let Arizona do whatever they want. I know, I'm just sometimes, I don't know. If it was any state, I'd just be like,

what the fuck are these guys doing? But they're right. No, I don't know. Thank you. Not your big daylight savings. No, you know, defend, right or wrong in this. It's like, it's just the time of the day.

You just have a different hour. So you now make it difficult on the rest of the people that aren't doing that hour. Let's talk about vaccines next. I can see a connection here. You know, one guy doesn't want to do it. Everyone else is doing the vaccine, you know. Ooh, boy, I think that's a podcast.

Okay. I'll say Pam as my name. Whoop can help. Right now, Woop is offering 15% off going on right now with the code forward play at checkout. That's one word, F-O-R-E-P-L-A-Y at checkout. You go to W-W-P dot com, save 15% W-H-O-O-P dot com, 4Play 15% off get all kinds of information on your sleep

which is getting trickier now if you're in arizona but if you're somewhere else maybe it isn't because you guys run the same time zone which is what we're talking about which is how we got to whoop which is how you get 15% off because you're listening to the show for play put that code in and you get 15% off you go to wop.com um tiger woods is tiger's in all of ours at least it definitely in all of ours okay i'm also putting rory in mine i love rory yeah big rory guy i think he'd be a good time It's his walk. You ever see his walk?

He's got this cocky walk to him. He bounces. And there's something about it. When you're at a tournament and you see him, you can just see the top of someone's head bouncing. You're like, that's Rory. He's got a baseball bat between his legs. He walks as confident as possible.

I'm trying to think who else. Do you have anybody else who would definitely be yours? Yeah. See, okay. Immediately I want like Bryson. I want Brooks. I want, I want, I mean, that's all the guys playing right now. I'm a big fan of.

Yeah. Dustin. Like, I want all them. but if we're going to be honest I mean, no doubt, John Daly I was going to say, it feels like you and John Daly would get along great. Can I tell you, I have a chance of meeting and playing with John Daly. Are you going to do it?

Are you fucking kidding me? So the guys at Loudmouth, you know Loudmouth? Yeah, the clothing company. Yeah, I know them. We were talking about doing something together. And it was funny, they bought, we did an auction to play around the golf, but I had surgery, so I couldn't play, but I had already sold the opportunity to play in a football.

force him with me. So I told him, I said, I'm a sub play for me for our team, but I'm going to come here. And I told the guy, say, hey, man, I'm really sorry that I can't play. I apologize. And he goes, I got to be dead honest with you. I just want to drink with you. And I was like, well, I can do that too. And so we got fucking wasted, had a blast. And he told me, he's like, I'd love, he goes, selfishly, I'm doing this at a business. I want to do something with you. He goes, I think you're right for loudmouth. I know you're into golf. I think we should collab. And I was like, let's do it. And I said, selfishly, I just want to meet John Daly. He was like, literally, that can

happen. He's in Clearwater at a bar every night. I was like, done. I fucking love John Daly. Would you let him hit a ball out of your mouth? Yeah. Okay. Because I have yeah, because I thought the fuck yeah, fuck yeah, I would. Just because of the picture. Because of the picture. Right.

Like, even if it goes south, which would be horrible. Dude, went south for him. He put a fucking, he put a fucking, he put a T in his fucking asshole. Oh, no, it was out of your ass. Well, so, first, She hit a ball out of my mouth. That was a couple of years ago. And then, like, years after that, she put a tea in my ass.

Dude, pulled the picture. She took a chunk out of my ass. Wait until you see a bad one. It's just a big bruise on my ass. You will never believe. You'll never believe. Skill shot out of that. But I'm glad she did that window was in my ass and not with my face.

She hits you in the head. You did? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, you're, she'll take your jaw off. Driver, maybe not. Yeah, yeah. You think you'd live?

Well, I'm not going to let her hit a fucking wedge out of her mouth. Take a little divit out of your cheek. Well, that was a question Were those Torblades? We talked about this the other day on the podcast If we were going to in a fight What club would you go to the fight with? Hold on we have the video here

You should have taken the box Oh, man Oh She just walks away She just walks away She feels so bad She smacked that's so hard And it threw both cheeks

Then there's a picture on my Instagram Of the bruise that it left me It bruised up right away Is it still up there? I follow pace branding. Yeah, she's great. We've done a bunch of videos with her. Yeah, I think I'm like a closeted golfer.

I don't think people think I golf because I party the way I do. But yeah, I love. Do you party on the golf course? Come on. I mean, I'd say, yeah. Why didn't know if that was like your one place of serenity? That's your healing spot. You do four hours of, like, get it back together.

My whole life, all through high school, every Saturday, Sunday, I had to wake up at like 5.30 in the morning to get out to the course, be the first ones out at like 610 with my dad and his buddies. And we would play a round of golf so fucking fast. I mean, like, not even joking. I'll call my dad. And, like, it's astounding how fast we play golf. Hang on. I got it.

Oh, I thought you're calling my dad. You have my dad's number? That's a tough. That is rough. That is rough, dude. That reminds me to getting paddled. Oh, yeah, you guys got paddle for that live show. Oh, well, yeah.

I was thinking that bear attack on the show. We got paddled. Hey, Dad, listen, I'm on a podcast. When I was a kid, we'd play golf in the mornings, how fast did we play around 18? About two hours. Wow. Yeah.

Depending if you lost a lot of balls. Yeah. All right, I love you. Two hours. Were you guys running? Hour and nine? Fah lying. My dad was a big advocate of ready golf.

Yeah. He was like, You got to be playing some decent golf to play in two hours. There's four people playing in two hours. Four people. Four people. Everyone's hitting at the same time. No, no, no. I mean, in a certain point, to play in two hours, it's like.

Oh, we would fly. Dude, that's T to Green Golf. There's no searching for balls. Like, you guys are playing some pretty good. I was a really good golfer when I was younger. Right, you have to be playing that fast. I remember we played Hilton Head one time, and I was like, at the turn, I was under, I was under par.

And I was like, and my dad's like, buddy, you're fucking crushing it right now. This is maybe my freshman year in college. And then I, and then as I went in college, this is going to sound weird. There's like a Dave Matthews effect. And I hate to you, the day Matthews, I like Dave Matthews. But I, as people started picking up golf, I started walking away from it. Because I was like, I'm watching my friends learn golf. And I'm like, I'm not playing with you.

Like, I want to play with people that can play. And so I started stepping away from it. And then I became a guy that people didn't know I played golf. And then you'd watch me play. Like, they'd go, Bert, you want to play? And I'd play with you guys. And I'd get there. And they go, oh, you got nice clubs.

I'd be like, oh, thanks. And then I'd tee off. And I've always been able to hit the ball very long. And they'd be like, holy shit. This is a perfect example. And by the way, I'll call this guy just so that we're clear. I love it. And by the way.

We don't think you're lying to us by any of you. So we're in Serbia. And my exec for the movie. is grew up in Augusta, grew up in Augusta, so golfer. And he's like, hey, we should go play golf. And I was like, okay. So there's one golf course in Belgrade. It's far out.

It is a hardcore municipal course. Like, I mean, it is, you, at times you just see a bunch of flags in a field. And you're like, okay. But the greens are all like three, no par four is, I want to say no par four is over three. 50. Wow. So every green is drivable. Every green is drivable.

And so we get out there. He does, all he knows is that he's making a movie about me and I partying my balls off. And I know the guy, he's a good friend of mine now. We bring a bunch of rosé out. And we have to rent clubs. We have to rent clubs in Serbia. And if you think the course is bad, the clubs are worse. The balls were horrible.

They had one set of balls you could pick from. They were like, oh yeah, there you go. The kind you'd get at like big five. So we go out to the first hole and I'm like, it's a dog leg over water, but I'm like, even when you know they measure it, I go, I think this is very drivable. First hole, I drive the green and I drive very close to the fucking pit. And he's like, what? No, but it's not.

Like if you played it, you'd do the same thing. Anyone in America that has a decent game would be like, I think I can reach it. Okay. I added, we played nine holes. I swear to God, I. drove four greens. Wow. And the other ones were like up by the bunker.

Like it was just so fucking easy. And he was like, this is fucking crazy. I've never seen this before. And I was like, no, it's just like, I've always been able to hit it. I've always been able to hit my drives long. I've good club speed. But, yeah, so when I'd play with people, they'd always be like, what the fuck? Yeah.

No, you just think, it's just like deceptive. You know, like, the fact that I can run a marathon and people are like, what? And you're like, yeah, I just, I don't know. I don't know. It's just, mine never matter sometimes. It's a good place to be because you never want to have expectations on the golf course. Like,

you don't want people to have expectations of a good golf game because then you're always disappointing them. Oh, I just did that. I just did that. I told everyone I'm amazing. Right. Yeah, now, now,

yeah, people are going to be like, this I got to see. Right, you were in a good spot. I was in a good spot. Every person you shocked. Yeah.

Now it's like, well, I heard you could hit four greens in Serbia. We used to play every, when I first moved to L.A., we played every day, every day. Every fucking day.

Did you have like the same career that you'd go out with? Me, Gary Valentine, I think Kevin James used to play sometimes with us. Scott Henry and this guy Jackie. Like just a, it was a, but me and Gary were every day, same cart. We were like best friends. And we played 36 holes every fucking day. Gambled. And that is when, that's what my game got really fucking good.

Like when I was 27, 26, dude, I was. was on the course and I have money and I didn't have a TV show and I was just like and they opened this place called Robinson Ranch and they give us memberships for five grand five grand cash you can have a membership you can play as much as you want and Kevin James and Gary are at the course and they're like Bertsky we're putting you in for five grand you in and I was like I'm in and they just paid it I paid them back and uh it was awesome Eric Dickerson used to play out there it was like it was it was like who's who of like Hollywood retired people and then me and Gary Valentine. It was awesome, man. And now my daughter is playing golf for her high school,

and she's in a state championship. Holy shit. Yep. Well, hold on. Okay. Let's plump our brakes. I think this may speak to the level of golf in Los Angeles. She's been playing for about seven months. Okay. And she is competing at a pretty high level because I don't think the levels. Or she has a ringer on her team. I haven't played with her yet. My daughter, Ila, they say, is better, but she's younger. George is a senior. And I'm playing with her for the first time Thanksgiving with my dad and my daughters. I've never played with them.

That'll be interesting. Oh, I can't wait to fucking destroy them. You won't let up on them? Dude, I'm broken that way. I remember playing tennis with this girl I dated one time in college, and I just was fucking destroying her. She was like, whoa, what are you doing? And I was like, I'm beating.

I'm beating. I'm winning back. I'm like, what the fuck did you want me? to do. And she was like, well, I don't know. I go, we can volley. If you want to volley, we can do that. But if you want to play a game, what am I supposed to let you win? And I was like, that's not, that's how games work. Games work where someone beats someone because they're better than them. She was like, but let me win a few. And I go, no, that's not, what am I just supposed to go, oh, you like, what? Get better. I did the same thing. I actually played a girlfriend in tennis.

And we were just like rallying, but then she just announced the score one time. She was just like, it's five two and I was like what did you and then it was just full systems go and I was just crushing my server at her crushing overheads and just like not even being friendly I was just like give me the ball let's keep this going dude the best have you ever seen me play sagura in tennis oh yeah that motherfucker and then this is the way my brain operates and he everyone knows this about me my at least my close friends he's like I'm taking tennis lessons and I was like I'll destroy you and he goes wait you've never seen me play and I said you've never seen me play I'll destroy you And he was like, hold on.

What if I'm good? And I go, I'm better. I'll destroy you. And he was like, great, we're doing a tennis match. I aced him. Maybe 45 times. I'm not even joking. He could not, he could not get his racket onto the ball.

He was swinging and missing. And it would hit the side and shoot up in the air. And he was like, and it stopped being funny very quickly. And everyone, like, everyone first like, come on, Tom. And then it was just so. Got sad. His tennis coach, he had a coach. His tennis coach is like, I can't help you, man.

He's like, he's got a division one serve. And he's like, and that was my second service. My first service was like fucking, like I have a very strong. But this is what I'm doing is bragging about my white privilege. I grew up on a country club. So like obviously all the trappings of like I'm a really good swimmer. I'm a good golfer. I'm a good tennis player.

And that's it. You played pickleball? One of my biggest passions. in this world right now is pickleball. We travel with a pickleball court on our bus. Shut up. Let's go play. This guy over here loves pickleball.

He's a paddle player, man. Yeah, paddle tennis. Love. Love. Yeah, yeah. Have you seen the one they do in Spain? Spain? Yeah, yeah.

Paddell? Yes. They go outside the glass cage. Damn it, dude. I've never played that. I would love to play that so bad. So bad. Can I tell you?

I want to get into badminton now. Badminton looks fucking badass. I watched a video on like the best badminton player of all time. It's, that's, that's a game. game. Dude, we would go when we were, this is how great the pandemic tour was. We would go and...

Tor was a huge word there. Tour was big. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We would take our bus into just a parking lot and and we would just use the lines for parking spaces as our lines and just spray paint in the

just spray, because chalk is so fucking hard. Spray paint a court in the middle of a target and and then be like, great, we got our court. And then we would play, and then we just leave. And if any, anyone else would be like, what is that? But anyone in their new pickleball, I'd be like, that's a good pickleball. It's a good setup right there.

Regulation pickleball court. Yeah, dude, I love pickleball. It's a great game. I love it. I was telling these guys, my brother and I, we entered a pro tournament down in Florida, and we got. How good is good? No, no, so we got wax. We took their first group to, like, a tiebreak or whatever.

Like, you played a 15, I think. Yeah. So I think I was like 16, 14. But then we dropped off. And then we did the brother thing where you want to kill one another, whose fault two, and then it really dropped off the table. That's the best. I'll play any racket game under the sun.

I, dude, we got really into ping pong in Serbia. Another good one. We had a ping pong table, and I never really played much ping pong. But if you're a racket guy, then everything comes pretty quickly. Yeah. And that guy, Kail, that I said, he is a hardcore racket guy. And then one of our guys that worked on the thing was like, oh, I'm in. And he shows up, and he has a racket.

ping pong racket that is weighted and the head's this big. And he goes, I practice on this one. And we're like, oh, this goose is a gamer. And then this German dude and this Dutch guy came in and they were ballers, ballers. And they were listening to Ramstein when they played. It was like, dude, dude, I mean, we got a ping pong table here. They go crazy. Oh, we have a thing called stool streams in here.

And we just play ping pong all day. And they basically just film us like in tournaments. It's the greatest thing that's ever happened to me in my life. I've seen that. Yeah, it's just like to be able to play backyard games for competition and people get to watch you and like bet on it. It's just the coolest thing of all time. It's what just happened. Who did we talk to the other day?

Was it Bubba that said someone had a backhanded ping pong? Oh, it was. Oh, Matt every. No. No, but he said Coutcher does. Or no. Cooch is supposed to be a stock. Daniel Berger.

He, they play a lot of ping pong. He has a two-handed ping pong. Backhand. Backhand. And they said, you've never seen anything like it. He actually attacks it with the two-hand and with the tops. I'm like, how does he get two hands on the whole? It feels like you can't pivot fast.

No. Here and then here. I think there is a theory to be made that the greats in any sport were left with that sport board, meaning like. Yeah. They had to think about it and do it their own way. Like, I feel like, like when I played Tom and tennis, I felt like what the advantage I had was all those summers from like third grade to eighth grade where I,

I was left at a tennis court by myself. And I was just, and I was waiting for my mom. Calling yourself one of the grades right now. And you're just sitting there going, yeah, I am calling my. No, but I'm just sitting there going like, fucking around with a ball, seeing what I can do with a tennis ball and a racket. And then one day you implement that into your game and you're like, oh, shit, like Tiger. Totally.

Tiger is one of those guys who was just sitting at a course all day long and was like, well, fuck. Maybe this will work. Yeah, maybe I'll just fuck around. And then you start fucking around. And I think that is what leads to, like, great. greatness in sports is just being bored with your, like just sitting. Like, do you remember when you fell in love with golf? I remember when I fell in love with golf.

And I was laying in bed and I had the balls we played with. And I was in bed with the balls. And I was rolling them around. It was in Philadelphia. I was probably 10. Oh, no, I must have, no, I was probably 10 years old, maybe nine. And we had played golf this place called Aronimic. and I had the balls left.

And my uncle and my cousins were all members, and they brought me. I was from Florida. And I remember looking at, it was pinnacle balls, and I was just, and they were like yellow. They looked like Caddyshack.

I remember being, it was, catyshack had just, not just come out, but I think it'd just come out, maybe. And I fell in love with golf. And it's like, I couldn't get enough.

I wanted to get back out and do it. And I think that, I wonder if that ever happened with Tiger. I wonder if it was, just ingrained in him or if he had that moment where he goes, oh, I fucking love this. I was strained. Yeah, but he also had the coaching. Like, I think that person was like Bubba, too.

Bubba is just dropped at a golf course and then he figured out how to hit it left, right, and every which way. Doesn't need a coach. Right. Nothing. Do you remember that as a kid? I mean, I remember, I remember sitting at a driving range, just not having nothing to do, and then going like, what happens if I moved my feet?

Like what happens if I step in here? Yeah. And learning a draw, learning a fade and going like, oh, shut the fuck up. Like those were the funnest moments in golf. And then you take them on the course and they never worked the way you thought they would. I never really still understand a draw or fade. Like when they go, oh, he's going to fade this to par three. He's going to fade it.

I'm like, why don't just hit it straight? Like, why don't I get just, what the fuck? But, yeah, I'm not that good. It is amazing when you think back. I don't know if I've ever thought about what I fell in love with first. I think it might be the aesthetic of golf. I think I was super young hearing like and my dad would take me at like 7 a.m. T time. We'd wake up at like 5.30 get breakfast and like getting excited for that.

Like the thing that my dad did on the weekends, I was like now I get to join with him. But I think like the sound of like the carts going by and just like that morning fog and do. Something about that was like, oh, this shit's like otherworldly. Like now this is like a real special place. Like it had nothing to do with the swing or the actual sport. I think it had everything to do with like the aesthetic of the place. This is going to sound patriots. archal but do you think it had because now that you say that I go I remember being allowed into the

the men's club at carolwood like they had a men's club women weren't allowed in and you had to be like I think you had to be like 16 to be in there and I remember going in at like 11 years old and my dad's like come on in well we'll get a burger and you're like and just all of a sudden you're like like like walking a little like yeah hands a little closer walking a little taller like so mr. Taylor. I'm big boy now. Yeah, and then you, and like, there is something about being welcomed in to, like, a man's sport when you're a child, and they're like, you know, and then they pay you the little compliment. You got a good short game.

And you're like, oh, thanks a lot. I appreciate that Ms. Roof. It's like that in all sports. Baseball walking through the tunnel, seeing the green grass for the first time. You fall in love with it. But baseball's different because, like, I was in love with baseball, but I was in love with baseball for a different reason. but baseball you always played with your peers. Right.

Like you never, like the coaches were, I mean, I grew up with fucked up coaches, but like baseball you always played with your peers. It was something you could, like, for us, it was something you could do outdoors in the summer, but you do it on the summer and then you do it all day and then you go to practice and you have games that night. And it was like baseball was different for me than golf. Yeah, it was like the way your dad treated, I think is the big one,

where it's like your dad brought you into this like man's world, this man's game. You were like, oh shit. And I only played golf. a handful of times growing up. But that was like hockey for me because I would play hockey and then see my dad play

but like sometimes you played in the men's league with your dad and you were like, oh shit, this is the locker room. Like dudes are having beers over there. Basketball was like that. Basketball was like that. You could play basketball with like, when we were in high school,

we were in ninth grade, you could go down to the Harbor Island Athletic Club and my buddy came in, his dad was a member and we'd go down and we'd play and then they'd play. and then they'd play a men's game.

And then every now and then they'd be like, why don't you guys come in and you play with the men's? And they'd guard you. They would let you, you know, get shots off. They wouldn't fucking do stuff. Do what you're going to do to do to your kids. Do what you do. Yeah, to your daughter.

Maybe they did. And that's why you are the way you are. Dude, I remember getting fouled by a man and being like, what the fuck? And he was like, hey man, you're in the paint. And you're like, fouled by a man. I'll never forget. I played goalie.

And I was playing the men's league. They just, like, popped me in there. And like, a man took a slap shot. and I caught it in the chest with like kids gear on it and I was like oh and then somebody skated over to him and it was like chill out to the kid's like set. You've got to learn.

Tie your skates bitch. There is a boy that there's a boy that one of my best, it's his son, my best friend. We got season tickets to the Rams game. This is going to, I'm going to sound horrible in a second. And so we're pre-partying and we're having a drink outside.

Getting ready to drive into the Rams game. and he comes out in a Seahawks jersey. He is maybe 10 years old at the time, I'm guessing, and he's in a Seahawks jersey. They're playing Seahawks. I go, hey man, go inside and change your fucking jersey. And he goes, I'm a Seahawks fan. I was like, your dad and I just bought season tickets to the Rams.

You're a Rams fan now. And he was like, dude, seriously? And he goes, I bet you they win. I go, I bet you they don't. And he goes, how much? I shall bet $250. And he goes, okay, deal. I said, you don't have $250.50.

And he goes, I can get it. And I said, no, no, I want to bet you something that matters to you. And he goes, what? And I was like, okay, if the Rams win, I get to cut your hair. And he goes, deal. And I went, hold on, think it through. If the Rams win, I get to cut your hair. Seahawks win, I'll give you $250.

And he goes, deal. And his dad walks out. And I go, why don't you run this by your dad? And he goes, Dad, I'm betting Bert. If the Seahawks win, he gives me $250. And he goes, and if they lose, he goes, then he cuts my hair and his dad goes okay mind you this is sunday the first day of school is monday first day of school is monday so he's like deal deal and he goes all right so we all

pack in the car my family his whole family and i am giggling the whole ride right i don't give a fuck about 250 dollars we get to the game rams destroy the seahawks it's the first game first game i am drunk now i'm drunk now i'm drunk now no no he's like i think he's in like fourth grade I'm drunk now and we're going home and I can't stop laughing. I can't stop laughing because I'm Googling pictures of bad haircuts. What I'm going to fuck this kid's head up. So I go by my house, I get my clippers. We go into the backyard.

Kids are, he's like, I don't care. I don't care. The first thing I do is I cut his bangs like simple jack from dropping thunder. Oh, no. And as I pull back, he's 10. He looks at me. He goes, does it look cool? I go, oh, buddy, you didn't think this bet through.

It's not going to give you a cool hair. I go, I go, you thought I wanted to cut your hair? Like, that was one of my biggest pleasures would be getting to cut your hair. Like you're a pervert. Like you got a hair fetish. Yeah, he goes, yeah. And I go, oh, man, I'm fucking your head up. He was like, wait, what?

And I went, this is how you raise a man. You didn't think the bet through. And his dad goes, buddy, when Bert said he's going to cut your hair, he's fucking your head up. And he goes, I got to go to school tomorrow. We're like, this is, and then I keep cutting his hair. And I just cut it so it looks like a helmet. Oh, shit. And I'm shaving the back.

And he's like, wait, I don't want this bet anymore. And we're like, that's not how that works. Nope. Now the girls come out. By the way, we're recording all of this. We're recording all of this. Girls come out, they start laughing fucking hysterically. He looks like he needs to be institutionalized.

Like, he looks like a fucking lunatic. And then he started crying. And my wife comes out, she's like, you're a fucking bully. And I was like, this is how you raise men. Sometimes you got to take a slap talk to chest. Sometimes you get fouled in the paint. Sometimes they let you play golf with them, and they treat you with respect. And you feel, sometimes they cut your hair and they fucking make you look like a dickhead.

And you will never make a bet. There is no chance that Carter Gruzen, I'll say his fucking name, that Carter Grusen will ever lay down a chancy parley in college. he will think that parlay through he will never call his mom and dad and go I lost 210 on the Packers and the over never fucking never

because Burt Kreiser fucked his head up when he was 10 years old that is fucking incredible holy shit I think we got a wrap yeah we gotta get you out of here on this KFC radio this has been so much fun

you got MSG tonight yeah yeah I gotta get my voice to rest do you get more nervous about playing in New York or is it like the same shit Same. It's the same. Tallahassee, I was a little nervous, but it's the same. I mean, it's funny. I, you know, I was in Boston last night. You think you'd be nervous. And I actually thought about that, oddly enough, on stage last night, I thought there was a time in my career where if I performed in Boston, I would want to curtail my material to make sure they liked it. And then I realized, oh, that was the big mistake you make when you're young. What you want to do is just be yourself and do the thing you do. That's why they're there. That's why they're there. And so everyone that is here has seen my specials, they know what I do. I take my shirt off I drink and I tell the machine. Ultimately, that's everything you need to know about me. It's a 10 out of 10.

It's so good. Fucking awesome. Where can people find tickets if they want to get them? Tonight, burp, burr-burth.com. I think it's sold out, but we always open up, we always hold tickets until the end. Okay. And we open them up at the last minute. There's always people that want them at the last minute.

So I think we opened up, I think last night they opened up 100 tickets. Okay. So it's a pretty big room. So keep an eye out for the whole, how long is the tour going for? Until I die. I know, I was looking at the dates before we got on here. You're going until May. Yeah.

Oh, shit. It's November. Yeah, and then I think I go right into movie. I'm doing, I think we're going, doing two movies back to back. And then, and then when the year starts up, it's fucking big. Like, we, I have big fucking plans for the beginning of 2023 is, if I, I will, I will slow down my drinking. Lose weight and get healthy because 2003 will be the funnest year of my life.

Without a doubt, I haven't announced anything yet. What a T. Jesus. Starting in January of 2023, and I'll tell you when I'm off, and you're going to go, shut the fuck up. The beginning of 2023 is the start of the funnest year of my life. And now, granted, I just had a year where I made a movie about my life.

at a TV show with Rosario Dawson's one and Jennifer Nettle's two most beautiful women in the world. And I'm starting to do arenas. I hung out with Aaron Rogers. I did the fucking Florida State for the first time. I'm having a great year now. 2003 is going to knock its dick in the dirt. Holy shit. Wow.

I can't wait to hear what a tease. Yeah. So thanks again for coming. All right. Thank you for doing this. Thank you very much. I appreciate it.