Fore Play - “My sister dressed me up as a girl”

Episode Date: September 24, 2019

This one goes off the rails. Fast. How many over par do you think you are in your life? How absurd is it that Rory has alignment issues? How mistreated were Trent and Riggs by their siblings? Wild show. Wild fun. Listen!You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/foreplaypod

Hey, 4Play listeners, you can find us every Tuesday and Thursday on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Welcome back to the show, folks. We have maybe one of the funniest moments in the history of the show. It comes right at the end. I mean, it had us in tears. I don't know if we could even finish the show. So stick around a little off the rails.

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You can't miss it. The more you play, the more you earn. Register now. You're going to start earning your Caliq. Today, let's talk some golf. Well, it's not bad shit. It is. It's bad shit crazy.

I think most people in the world are probably like at work or on their way to work. Right. But they're used to it. Their brain is like, they have like a mental clock on when to get to work. And 715 ain't it for me, chief. It's early. I'll admit that, but it's like, you know, I mean, it's doable. It's not that early.

It's not 5 a. No, the sum was up. Yeah. Frankie just came in his laptop that has street mud on it. You want to talk about street mud? Look, I got out of my fucking cab. Yeah. And my bag must have just been open.

And my laptop, my work laptop, oh, there's a little day. My work laptop just fell onto the street into like the garbage that hasn't been picked up in New York City yet. And I just stared at it. And the cab driver was like, you need to close the door. I was like, just give me a minute. Like, I need to pick it. this valuable piece of equipment out of the fucking muck. Another thing that I dropped.

So I'm getting the new iPhone. Like I already pre-ordered it. Went to Verizon did the whole thing. I got everything that's going to come on 26 in three days. Okay. Or if you're listening to this in two days. Nice. You're not usually good at that.

And the guy's like, oh, you're going to get this. So I have an iPhone XS, which is like next, which is like not the 11. It's the highest one you can get. It's not the XS pro, but it's the XS. I think I have that one too. Right. whatever it is. They guys like,

we're going to give you $500 for it when you trade it in because it's like a very valuable phone still. So that's great. So like we did all the math. Everything came out to all the thing I wanted to be. Like, you know, Barstow gives us a certain amount for our phone bill

and the whole thing. So everything's going to be great. And then last night, I went to, yesterday I went to a wedding, my cousin's wedding, great wedding, really small wedding at a brewery,

so much fun. Never like went to a small wedding like that. I had the time of my life, got really drunk, got back to my apartment. We ordered some five guys. I was in the bathroom. Like, I was like, like, like talking to people outside as I'm like taking a piss or whatever.

And I put my phone on like the sink and it just fell off and shattered. Now, I have to trade this thing in in two days. The guy's like, the guy at Verizon said to me, if you don't drop this phone in the next two days because it's pristine that you will get $500 off your new phone. And I'm going to give you $28 for a while. And I'll be surprised if they give you any dollars for that. I dropped my phone. It shattered. like it looks like Charlotte's web on the back of my phone.

Yes, it does. The whole thing shattered. No, mine's been in that, in that situation for months. So now I'm thinking, do I, like, do I get the back, the back fixed? No. You know how expensive that is? What is it, like $100? Nope.

Wow. I went in there. For the back? Did I not touch? You did. I think you told me when the, oh, no, no, no, Frankie. I went in there. I went in there and I went in there and I put my, I had to get in line.

An appointment. What are they called there? The genius bar. Genius bar. A bunch of geniuses running around apparently at the iPhone store. If you're a genius, you just go work at the iPhone store. I go in there. I'm thinking like it'll be $100 to fix my screen.

My back's all banged up, but I don't really care because who cares about the back? You don't use it, right? Yeah. So I go in there. I get in the line. I wait an hour. I go out. I get a couple slices of pizza.

I go back in. Finally sit down. One of the fucking geniuses walks over. sits down with me for like five minutes. He goes, okay, we'll fix your screen. It'll be $280. I go, what? He said $208.

He goes, is the back broke too? I go, yeah, he goes, that's $500. What? 500 total to get the back of the front pick. So you wouldn't be coming out of head at all. So I'm not, you'd be breaking in my phone, sir, genius. I'm not just the back. Isn't that ridiculous?

I'm not going to get anything for this. Yeah. That's insane. Just you had two days to not drop your phone. I can't tell you how many times I walked around the apartment. I said, can you guys believe I dropped my phone? And everyone's like, we understand. I was like, no, no.

Like, I haven't dropped my phone once in 365. three days, right? I had it for a year. Yeah. I just couldn't drop it at 364th and 365th day and I dropped it. It fell just right on the fucking tile. How long did you stare at it after it fell? I stared at it. I heard it. I heard it. I looked at it. I was taking a piss. I then switched to sitting down on the toilet and just staring at it. There's just some things that only happened to you. This is one of them. This may be the number one example. I made my, was it like a text that made it vibrated? No, it just fell. You've been drinking all day. I drank all day. I didn't. I put it like on the.

the edge of the sink and I thought I'd be fine. Because I've done that move where I've put it on the sink. It's been fine. I jump in the shower. And then like a couple texts, it starts moving. I'm looking at it. I go no. Oh, no. And then I made, um, I made my girlfriend apologize to me for me my, my phone. That's how mad I was. Yeah, you had to be just an absolute mess to deal with. I was a mess. I was like, because she wasn't like acknowledging it. I was like, do you understand how the gravity of what I just did? I couldn't drop it for the next two days. I'm like, you need to apologize to me right now. It's like, I'm sorry, you dropped your phone. I said, thank you so much.

I said, thank you. Now you can leave. Because I need a time, I need a little moment. Go outside. And I need to stare at a blank wall right now. I need to turn on some like, some like light breeze music on my iPhone app that makes you go to sleep and just stare at a wall.

I didn't actually do that. Speaking of music, I saw, I watched Rocket Man last night. Great movie, man. Phenomenal. Oh. Dave Portnard said he hated it.

He said the worst movies they've ever seen. That's just wrong. He's also like, he doesn't like musicals and like, he doesn't get in, touch with his emotions. I feel like it was a fantastic movie. Perfect way to show Elton John's life.

Oh my goodness. Now I've got to watch Rock, man. I haven't seen it. The way they used to see it. Also, I'm a huge Elton John fan. My mom is a huge classic rock, like rock and roll fan. All those like hours and hours and hours that I would be in the backseat while we'd drive on like hockey trips, road trips, early morning practices.

She'd always be cranking like Elton John, all the classic rock stars. And so Elton John just seeing like his life that way. He also, I mean, he was like, the way that they show the movie was just he went through the classic cycle of like a rock star. Yeah. You know, he's like kind of a little bit different weirdo and then he becomes a mega rock star and that actually like isolates him more turns of drugs and all that. And then he came out on the other side. He's been sober for like 29 years. Yep.

So kind of like going through all that and like Frankies saying they did it in like a musical way. Oh, and I love his jams. Yeah, I know the hits. I don't know like deep cuts of Elton John, but I know I know the hits. Well, it's cool because some of like. any hits you don't need to know the deep it's true some of like the the second tier hits and stuff that you kind of forget about they go through and he like they explain and i guess they don't explain they just like showcase how they came to be and how important they were in his career it was awesome

he was playing at the coliseum in november this is his last tour right yeah it's farewell tour yep i gotta go see i heard the tickets are astronomical whatever they are they're worth it yeah they're totally we're talking about our lives i've got the uh general assembly going on at the u.n uh this week. I live right over there. Second year. Do I talk about this last year? Yeah. So the General Assembly at the UN, I live over there. So you got Secret Service everywhere? That's when the

world leaders come to the building that is basically right next to my apartment building, and it is a goddamn disaster over there. There are 8 million cop cars, 8 million cops. I have to, and this is why I brought this up, you have to carry around a piece of mail where I live because you have to get past a barricade.

So you have to be like, I live at this building. I forgot my piece of mail. So I I am already anticipating a knockdown, dragout fight with some police officer trying to get to my apartment tonight. Because you forgot mail. You forgot a piece of mail. Yeah, because I do, I live. You forgot mail. So, I live so close.

Come on. I like that. I did like that. I live so close to the U.N. that there's barricades all around my building. So you have to walk through a guard to be like, those are people going to the U.S. I just want to go home. Go to some meeting. I just want to go home.

So I already forgot my piece of mail for the first week. It's Monday. they're all week. So tonight when I get home, I'm going to have to be like, I swear to God that I live here. It's tough to add something new to your routine. You go like keys, wallet, phone, mail.

Well, last year I had forgotten, well, I didn't forget. I didn't know that this was a thing that was going to happen. So I just left my apartment building a year ago, Monday last year. And it was just like, I don't know what happened. Is it World War? I really thought something horribly wrong had happened.

And then they're just like, I just like, I just like asked around. They're like, no, this is just like, it's going to be like, for a full week. Wow. Just crazy amount of cops. Black SUVs running around with world leaders in them.

And I forgot my piece of mail. The only thing I remember is because I've never lived up in that area. But last year, maybe it was two years ago as I went to like a buzzed into like a Dunkin or somewhere right around there. And just in front of me were two like super tall guys with classic like secret service outfits on and the earpieces. Yep. Just like right in front of the line. I was like, what in the fuck is going on right now? Yeah.

And then walked outside. Look to my left. barriers, lights everywhere. I was like, went on Twitter. I was like, oh, yeah, you and General Assembly. Yep. I do find it funny that I'll be, like, sitting in my apartment in my underwear, like, watching TV and like 400 feet away, the biggest decisions in the world are being made.

I'm just sitting there just like, you know, itching my balls. Tweet about the bachelor. We should do. Yeah, tweet about the Bachelor. And they're like, we got to do these sanctions. And I'm just like, ah, just like, let me get to my apartment. I got to remember my piece of mail. Yeah, I really got to, I got to remember my piece of mail.

Maybe I should text Robbie Fox to bring me my piece of mail, but I'm not going to see it. It's like I've seen Jonah Hill and 40thurg and you just hold you just want to go home. Like you just can't. You're making us more difficult than it needs to be. I just want to go home so bad. But from their eyes, they're like, well, this is the spiel of a person

who would try to get through these parrackets. Sounds a lot like a guy who's just trying to go home. No, maybe I'll flag down one of the doormen that's working. I'll be like, you recognize me, right? That guy's going to act like he's never seen you before. What? What was that?

What? I think it's a funny bit. Yeah. And I was leaving handcuffs. You know what I didn't do this weekend? What? I didn't play golf this weekend. Yeah.

Yeah. First time in a long time. And it was a perfect weekend too. So nice out here. I just kept seeing. I went to visit my parents in Boulder. I saw that. In Boulder.

Last minute decision. That's a little outdoors weekend. It was outdoors. My dad's a big outdoorsman, as we've talked about. One of the great disappointments of his life is just how, like, I'm, A, I'm not handy at all. I can't do anything. Like, literally. generation just doesn't have that and B I'm just like I don't have like the outdoor bug

yeah my brother's got it loves it fly fishing all that so I'm fly fishing with my dad first of all I was way better than I thought I would be maybe it's the eyes yeah it could be no that's the depth no joke no joke my dad legit said to me because if you dumb I wonder if that be a big improvement on your skate shooting your whole eye thing I was like that I swear to guys you got unsolicited you just did it for that moment that's the reason you got it now the pressure is on though We go ski shooting and I stink. I've had this excuse for 32 years. Yeah.

Now we go ski shooting and I stink. It's like, well, you just suck. You suck at ski shooting. We went fly fishing. A couple things. One, so, you know, like, there's a couple different kinds of, obviously, fishing. Like, you just get the classic spinner rod, which is what most people do. You flick that thing out there, easiest thing in the world.

Fly fishing a whole different game. And I've done, like, we've done a couple trips before where it's like boys trips, like my dad, my brother and I. So I've had to, like, learn how to fly fish. It's probably been five or six years. So I got no. clue we're doing. Luckily, we had this guide, Stephen. A couple things on flyfish. One, my four, you know, you guys

ever been fly fishing? No. So it's the one, you ever see a river runs through it? Nope, Brad Pitt? Nope. Nope. Man, spiritual movie. We're not giving you much there. No. The fish fly out of the water and you catch them with a net, right? No, that's not really. That's not how it works at all. That's a bear.

Waiting at the end of a... Dude, I've seen videos where these fish, like, fly over and these people are just like, maybe it's just like this one video. Before you go on, what do you think fly fishing is? Can you, what do you think it is? I thought it was, to be honest, bro. I thought it was like, he nervously looks around the room. To be honest, bro, I thought it was these fish that, like, jump out of the water and, like, you just ride down the thing and you catch them.

That is one of the most, like, I'm a long island is, like, fucking city, slick, you've never been. That's, you make me look like. Bear grills out here. I mean, I know nothing. Fly fishing, you fish with a fly rod. It's just a different kind of rod. Oh, okay. So instead of like flicking that thing out there and you reel it in like a spinner,

that's the one where you kind of like the line has typically it's like more color to it. You kind of fling it out there. You do it's a lot more artistry, they call it. Okay. I was off. Even like if you get real fancy, you got like your left hands kind of pulling some of the line out as you're flicking it out there. And you're standing in the water always. Usually you're wading into the water.

Yeah. Like a lot of times you're standing right in the middle of the stream. We had like wet waiters on. We're basically, you're just like in the water. You don't even have waiters on that are keeping you warm because it's too hot out. We're just in like in, you're a little jit just standing in middle of the stream. And it's a lot more artistry. There's a lot of like skill to the way that you cast.

You do like roll casting. You like flick the thing around. And there's some beauty to it because you're like flicking it instead of just typical getting spinner rod, blah, blah, blah. Well, I got to say my forehand cast is phenomenal. Phenomel. Backhand cast one of the most pathetic things you've ever seen. Yeah. A little bitch slap.

Oh my God. couldn't get the thing like out of the water i had the guide like you gotta do the uh wangardium laviosa is that your little harry potter you flick the the the wrist problem is you got to get your arm way higher and the other thing is the guy so i had like a guide with me you know and the guide brings his own like flies which are obviously like the little like lures that you put at the end um he brings his own flies and he kind of he kind of says a couple of times at the beginning like that's trying to lose too many flies he's come out of my pocket you know i must have lost like 15 flies.

And every, I'm getting them stuck on fucking weeds, you know, like a rock, I just yank it. He always says to, whenever, like, it would get a little tangled up,

he'd be like, whatever do is it gets a little tangled, don't wiggle. It always makes it worse. And it's just like, you can't reprogram your brain not to wiggle something when it,

like a line gets a little, oh, immediately. It gets like, the hook would get stuck at like the end of my rod, I'd just give it a little, like a little wiggle.

I'd be like, oh, fuck. And then it's like, you should see the disappointment in this guy's face. Damn. Just he knew he had like 10 minutes of trying to untangle my shit in front of him. It was that.

But I caught nine fish. Wow. How many your dad catch? He probably caught around there. He also does a thing where he fished like really hardcore for the first hour and a half, didn't see him. And then he kind of wanders over and like wants to make sure I'm having a good time. And if I catch a fish, it's like, it's like in hockey, like a hockey practice. Like the coach brings a little kid out and they just like let him go down and score.

And everybody's like, wow, way to go. That's like I catch one fish. my dad's like yeah Sam that was amazing like thanks dad yeah thank you come on the guy literally handed me the rod and just said like throw it that way

and it's something we'll eat it uh so my version of fly fishing is a lot easier yeah where they jump all way easier they jump into the boat there's one video someone's got to send it to me when they listen to this there's one video where this guy's going down this like little speed boat and he's going down a river and all these fish are

jumping over the boat and onto the boat and they're like holy fuck like this is like the easiest thing They're like, holy shit. There's like a version in which they like catch them with nets and shit. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, I like jump out of the water. I thought that was called fly fishing. No.

Sounds so much fun. You get hit in the face of them. That sounds crazy. But that's not what fly fishing is. It's incredibly different. A lot more artistry to it. All right. All right.

I just want to comment on Lurch and Scallon. Obviously, I think a lot of people were following that and his updates. I mean, his buddy, I've never heard. His buddy went like 0 and 8 against him. I saw 10 and O for Lurch. 10 and O? That's what I saw. How do you lose 10, imagine a road?

somebody. He's just not a good golfer. Yeah. You just suck and your handicaps way off. Yeah, way off. It has to be way off. Yeah. No offense.

I don't even know his buddy. Don't even know his name. But you can't. I've never seen every, you can't let someone like Lurch every time he updates on social media. He's just destroying you and golf. It'd be like Lurch would be on like the sixth hole. He's like, oh, Lurch four up through six every round they play.

What's wrong with that guy? That's crazy to me. Yeah, you got to, you got to fix that somehow. You got to fix the handicap. You got to figure it out. I don't. you even had a good hand-a-cad system is made so that that doesn't happen right right if you win seven or something out of like 10 like that's pretty much an ass kicking you win

73 eight to two something 10 in a row like that just can't have it lurch could be playing some phenomenal golf but he was texting me like i think he's playing pretty well but like he's not he's out there shooting 65 every time so it's stunning that's a stunning number his buddy's got to figure out and then i saw he got um he hung out with my boys at leave and thistle which is um great club on the water up there. Colin Dave, those guys, they were getting shit-faced at the Scottish clubhouse. They do it a lot differently over there. Like all of our golf clubs are obviously a little, like, ritzier,

and you've got to pay, like, these big initiation fees. I'll be honest. Levin-Thysel sounds very ritzie to me. Levin-thistle? Levin-thistle. No, it's like blue-collar. You'd be stunned. Wow.

Like the caddies, a bunch of guys who caddy at St. Andrews are members at Levin-Thistle. That name. I just can't get over that name, really? Levin-thistle. That sounds blue-collar to me. All the course over there. Just feet, because I... Levin Thistle?

Levin Thistle. What have you ever heard the name Thistle and thought like, oh, I could, I could like, you see like coal? It's also I, I, you see like guys walking around in the past where it's like a lot of the, a lot of clubs over there are like blue collar and America is a lot different in terms of like you got to pay a billion dollars to play somewhere. You know, like, you know in that movie the greatest game ever played? Yeah.

You know all the rich guys that come and knock down his house? Like, and they're wearing like the top hats and they're all like the old Scottish dude. That's who I see. belongs to leaving thistle. But I guess I'm wrong. Yeah, you're wrong. Okay.

But I get it. I mean, you're right. That name, fine. It's a little different. But anyways, over there, things are a lot different. It's like the every, the common man kind of club. They have some that are super ritsy and waspy and it's crazy expensive and all that. This is not one of them.

So it was nice to see Lurch over there having some drinks of my boys. We're actually in here early because we have a massive day today, Trent Danny and I are going to play in the New Amsterdam vodka golf outing. Very exciting. It's incredibly exciting. Frankie can't come, which is also sad. As excited as we are, you're sad. I don't blame you.

You guys are playing a top-tier golf course with a top-tier company at an unreal event, and I'm just going to miss it. It's tough, but, I mean, Glen Oaks is where we're playing. You actually have vodka. That's where we're going to be drinking. There's official vodka of martial sports. If you didn't know that, official vodka of martial sports,

spit in chicklets, guys, pink Whitney. Yes, I have my issues with Whitney. Yes, we have our match coming up relatively soon. But yes, they also created just. a delicious delicious drink. We were drinking it up at Cabot brought a couple bottles up there. Yeah. Pink Whitney.

We're mixing it with a little water. You throw a little ice and then a little bit of water. It basically just turns into pink lemonade. Yep. It's so good. I would imagine we'll be drinking some of those today. I think the Pink Whitney's will be drank today. I would go into enjoy every single second of it.

Agreed. You got to keep the game changer, the Pink Whitney game changer on deck for your tailgates, your pregames, your watch parties. If you can't find a bottle of Pink Whitney yet, just head over to your local liquor store, ask them directly to get some bottles in stock or in participating markets,

check Drizzley for home delivery. That's Drizley, D-R-I-Z-L-Y. Drizley, go check them out. They deliver alcohol, especially in New National Vodka, vodka, write to you. I get tweets from people in Cedar Rapids, Iowa, who are, they got Pink Whitney displays all over the place. All over the place.

It's nationwide, man. It's crazy. Pretty cool. My dad got like 10 boxes of it. Just loves it. I think he named it the official drink of Borelli's restaurant, Pink Whitney. Wow. I saw him with the martini glasses.

Is that what they were? Yeah. He was excited about it. Yeah. That's exciting. brought to you by New Amsterdam Vodka. They are the official vodka of Barcelona Sports. Go get yourself some.

You are going to love it. Headlines, we can rip through these. Sebastian Munoz wins the Sanderson Farms. First PGA Tour playoff in nearly a year, which stunned me. I remember, I don't know, the beginning of one of the years, maybe 2017, 2018. There were like five in a row, five playoffs in a row. That's every other week they go to a playoff. Yeah, it does seem that way.

So the playoff ended a peculiar streak of 38 consecutive PGA tour event. that were decided in regulation. Dayton Charles Hollow 3rd, winning at a playoff in Sea Island at the end of last year. That was like, to me, that was the most shocking stat. I mean, have you ever heard of a hockey game, like a hockey team going 38 straight games without going to overtime?

And the leaderboards are always so bunched. So bunch. It's just, it's bound to happen at least a couple times, if not in a row, at least a couple times over the course of a few weeks. But 38 in a row, that's stunning. Stop doing that with your thumb. Okay. What's your right?

It's making a noise into the mic. You're smacking that thing. All right. You know? I didn't know. I thought maybe he'd stop for like after two seconds, but I know so much. I started liking it. You were, it's like he was rubbing the rubber band thing around the mic.

I started, I started, I started to enjoy the feeling of it. Yeah. I'm sorry. I'm glad I put it into that. I didn't mean to. I'm glad I put an end to that horrific noise you were making. I can't tell you how bad I want to do it right now. I don't even know what noise to do it.

I don't even remember what I was doing. This thing here? Yeah. Can you hear that? Oh, yeah. All right. I'm sorry. It's so annoying.

May you hear that, Jake? I got to picking at it. How long were you doing that? It's a pretty significant amount of times. No, come on. I mean, five seconds of that is more than enough. Okay. I was picking out.

Five seconds. I thought you meant you've been doing it the whole show. No, no, I just started. My God. I just started picking at it. You pick it out of scab? Yeah, I pick it scabs. You know what I did?

I fucking dropped my phone, man. Just two days. Two days I just had to go. Two days. I would have boxed it up. You know what I told the guy, too? I said, can I just give you my phone right now? You just give me like a loaner.

Like, give me something just to let me go for two days. You guys like, I can't do that. It's not our responsibility. Just don't drop it. I said, I won't. I smacked it on the ground. You know, you are just coming off a show about how, like, anti-case you are. I know.

Steve Jobs didn't die to have his beautiful logo covered by leather. Yeah, I still agree with that. Even if you lose money on it, it's like... The new iPhone has like a matte back, I think. It doesn't have a glass back. Is that right? I could be wrong. I mean, I'm a guy who doesn't use a case either.

But I have tried to put one on. You put in your pocket. It feels like it's... You're trying to take it out. It's like, it's rubbing against your jeans. It gets stuck. I agree. This is the pure product that Steve Jobs wanted right here.

He built. He created it. It's so clean. And then as we say that, like we all have shattered screens. Not me, but probably bound to happen because I do, I put it in the bathroom too when I'm taking a shower or something like that. It's going to fall. Yeah. What are you going to leave it in your room?

No. You can't go that far away. You can't be that far away. You can't be that far away. You just can't get over it. I can't get over it. Andrew's like flaunting his fucking hard case. He's throwing his phone on the floor.

I hope that thing breaks. So is Jake. I mean, Andrew sent me a side message. I'm just reading. He's chirping you like to me quietly. Saying what? This is why Frankie can't be anti-case. A $10 case saves him $500.

He just sent that to me. It's an infuriating message. He also sent me a video of the fish just jumping into the boat. Look, this is what I thought fly fishing was. Look, there's a million fish just jumping up in the air. And they're just riding through in a boat. Yeah. No, that's fly fishing.

Now, wouldn't that technically be fly fishing? No. Why? Because I think that's flying through the air. That's literally they put like an electrical charge, I think, into the water or something crazy like that to like make the fish. I don't care what they do. And they just ride around in a boat and they jump into the boat.

There's no artistry to that. No, but like that is the word fly. I don't care. There is like at the end of the day, I just didn't know what it was. So to me, to someone that didn't know what fly fishing was and they've seen a video of fish flying into boats. I thought maybe that that was fly fishing. I get it.

But you don't have. to keep justifying why you thought you were like so wrong. But this could be telling you that's not flying. This could be the name of it. Like even very, right now, these people may call it fly fishing. I don't, I just don't, like, there's, fly fishing is just something different. So this needs a name. Because the video is called thousands of big fish jumping into a boat.

We need a name for this. And they're just like fly fishing. Soar fishing. They're soaring through the air. Danny Willett still playing golf, which is amazing. He went, I think he said he fell outside of the top 400 in the world. in the time since he won the Masters, the famous Masters where Speed collapsed.

Daniel Lott won that one. His brother was tweeting up with Storm, all that stuff. Seems like forever ago. Wins on the European Tour, the BMW PGA. First time he's won on home soil. The European Tour event on home soil. How old do you think Danny Wild is? I just looked it up.

32. It's pretty fucking close. All right? For being honest, I thought he was 33. He's 31, but I thought you were going to go older. He seems like an older guy to me. Really? Eddie Will.

I thought he just disappeared for like five years. We really, we really stunned you with those. I know, I was ready. I was ready to be like, actually. But you really,

there's no worse feeling than that when you're like, how much you think this cost? I did the same thing with Perry Woodlet. How much does this, has this guy make? And you're like, oh, whatever, like $2 million.

I don't do it. Holy fuck. I thought you're going to guess like 80 grand. Yeah, I just do it based on like when he, okay, when he won the Masters, he had to have been in like his late 20s.

That was what? Four years ago? Well, so you were correct about that as well. How old did you think when he won the Masters? He was, like, still pretty new on the scene. I would have said I was hoping he was like 30 when he won the Masters. Should be a 30, what, 34, 35? Yeah, I was thinking 35 would have been a, I was going to be like, no, you're wrong.

But, you know, Danny Wilts, still alive, still winning tournaments. Good for him. I haven't heard that name in a long time. No. Yeah, it's weird. Somebody wins a Masters and they just, like, fall off after that. You don't really here. I feel like, um,

Reed kind of did that for like a year, because he wins the Masters, then he has like, was it the, he wins the Masters and he has like a year and a half and then the Ryder Cup when he struggled. Yeah, right?

Yeah. So it's like, it kind of did that to him. I feel like Danny Willett obviously fell off the end of the earth. Sergio, I feel like he kind of won the Masters. And then,

which I think that was a little bit more understandable because he was so much older and that was like his big hurdle. He wins the Masters. I wouldn't be surprised to Sergio ever even played golf again. So it's interesting to see that kind of do that to people. But Danny Willett went in on the European tour. Good for him.

Andrew threw in a little blurb here that I didn't see, but apparently John Rom, who barely lost, said that he's apparently turning over a little bit of a new leaf. Instead of like strangling everyone around him after the end of the round, he said that you can't be too upset because today he's playing the old course with his dad for the first time. Oh, wow. That seems like a guy just got out of like therapy.

Correct. That's what I thought too. Remember when he had the bombs? I am in control of my emotions. I am happy now. That's a guy. I mean, that's just a guy who's going to snap down the road.

He's John, you, a guy like you. It's all fine and, it's all fine and well because I'm playing with Papa. At the old course. Papa. I'm playing with Papa at the old course.

So I'm fine. I am in control of my emotions. You cannot affect me. Yeah, no, John Ron. You don't change a guy like John Rom. You just have that attitude. There's no way he is in control of his emotion.

What's that Seinfeld? What are they saying, Rehnfeld. Serenity now. That's what's going on here. It's ready now. It ends up driving you crazy and you end up snapping on people. John Rom, he just needs to embrace who is. He's a psychotic, hothead lunatic who's super, super good at golf. And that's just what it is. The reason that he's actually playing the old course is because the Alfred Dunhill-Links championship is this week over in Scotland. I talk about it every year. But it's very cool if you can catch any of the coverage on TV. They play the old course. They play Kings Barnes, which is like the new, basically like the Pebble Beach of Scotland.

It's awesome. It's, I think, only built in like the last 20 years or so. They had the women's British open there a couple of years ago. I think they said like 80 or 90% of the play there is American because they charge a lot more. And, you know, if you're local Scott, you're probably not crazy about like the new modern course. I think it was built by like an American developer. I've played Kings Barnes. It's fucking phenomenal.

So they'll be there. And then I think Carnusti is the other one, the third one in the first one in the world. rotation. So if you can catch any of that coverage, check it out the Dunhill links. That's why he's at the old course. Rory, some good stuff from Rory. He barely made the cut on the number this week and then backdoor to top 10, which is classic Rory.

I don't feel like nobody backdoor's top 10s more than Rory McElroy. Finish tied for ninth over on the European tour. He said he's battling alignment issues hard. Now, I just threw that in because to think that somebody at Rory McRoy who's, and we talked about his swing a million times, his ball striking, what it looks like, what it feels like watching him, how majestic it is. To think that someone like him could just be battling alignment issues out there after winning the FedEx Cup, after having the year he had, winning the players championship, like as

dominant as he is striking the golf ball, to think that something as simple as an alignment issue is fucking his world up is crazy. He said, I hit balls for two hours yesterday after I played. This was right. I think this was Friday night after he barely made the cut. I hit balls for two hours yesterday after I played. then again for 90 minutes before I played today but it's hard when your alignment is off I can trust

in the range but on the course is a different story I hit a few loose ones but it was better so again just thinking about the fact that someone like Roy McElroy something so simple as alignment like imagine how many little issues we have I don't ever think of alignment never once I just like I mean somewhat like I'm like where's the hole

I think that's it where's the green that's a good start like but how like how much how how how How, like, dialed in is he for, like, or is a pro golfer for alignment? Like, are they, their point is like, I think when they talk about it, it's that where they're actually aligned and where they, in their mind think they're aligned or different. That's when, like, your alignment's off, right? Gotcha.

So, like, there would be, there be times where you could line up to the ball, Frankie, and I would take a picture of you, then you back off. You'd be like, holy, fuck, because you think you're aligned right at the green, but you're not. Yeah, it's stunning that, that happens to Rory McRoy. It's shocking. I mean, it's absolutely shocking. He also was chirping the Solheim Cup, the pace of play. He said, I watched, I don't want to single out particular people,

but I watched a lot of the Solheim Cup at the weekend, which is such a Euro thing to say. At the weekend? I watched a lot of the Solheim Cup at the weekend. Oh, that just hits my ear, like somebody just punched me in the head. I have the weekend. Unless that's like a typo. But I watched a lot of the Solheim Cup at the weekend.

Is that what they fucking say? No. That can't be what they say. I mean, I don't spend a lot of time. I just copy-pasted it. I don't spend a lot of time around European people, but at the weekend. And he doesn't like the term golfing. No coat today.

No, Kate, today. Yeah, come on. He doesn't like when we say we're going golfing, but he likes to say at the weekend. I mean, according to this, this is golf. I'm sorry, this is golf channel. Golfing channel. It should be called golfing channel. The quote says, I watch and I don't want to single out.

particular people, but I wash a lot of the Solheim Cup at the weekend, and it was really slow. Wow. Hmm. I don't like it. Nope. Imagine if he had started singling people out. Of women's golf, just roasting the women.

That would have been quite a scene. He's like, that one, her, her, her. You guys are playing too slow. Is it known that, like, women's golf is slower than men's golf? I don't think so, right? I don't think that's, like, a stigma around women's golf. I think, yeah, I think just everybody's slow. Like everyone's slow.

just all fed up with speed and golf. It's like a real hot topic. Oh, big time. You know, people just want to say it's like buzzwords. Slow, slow, pace, pace, pace of play. Like if there was a... Pick it up. Like if there was a golf debate on TV that they broadcast,

the big issue would be pace of play. Yeah, pace and play. They'd be all... Grow up. 20, 20 professional golfers on stage, and they'd all be like, we gotta do something about this pace of playing. That's...

Who gives a shit? That's not the solution. I know. I'm just saying. I've heard too much about pace of play. Clearly it's like... Just figure it. out and until you figure it out I don't want to hear about it I don't know that's a solution

me some other people can figure it out I wonder how that GPS thing went this weekend I didn't see remember I haven't seen either yeah see that would that's at least a start yeah but that's like based on shame which we like that's different I love that people hate being shamed they don't like it's a real motivator they don't like being publicly shamed especially no clearly not that'll that'll change they want that it hit it hard they would have like shamed them at the golf like like we haven't heard of it's a real about it. Or if there hasn't been any, like, headline stories coming out of it.

They're not doing it the right way. Like, do it on the 18th green. Put up, put up billboard. Put a billboard. You were slow or like a big red, slow. Big red fucking sign on top of, like, the 18th green, like, slow. Slow. It does seem like if flashing slow side.

Yes. It does seem like if nothing gets done at this point, after all of the media coverage that it's gotten, it's like, all right, well, then we're just going to play slow and everybody's going to bitch about it, but we're not going to do anything about it. I think that's pretty much been everybody's, argument even from the PGA tour They're like well we're gonna bitch about it but like nothing's gonna happen Nothing if the 2020 majors don't have anything in effect to it

By then? Oh, they won't yeah they're not no way And it's also a good point of it is like it doesn't really affect Anyone outside of the guys playing in the group That's what I've always said It doesn't matter on TV that you're just cut to a different person Right doesn't really matter that much And we want some of those slow moments because they're like dramatic Right

I agree with that I just go up I'll go out and get an iced tea I'll go to the bathroom and I come back and they're just more golf going on. I don't need to care about the guy who just took like a minute and a half, like reading a putt because I'm not going to see it. I'll just scroll through Twitter for a second. Exactly. Not a big deal.

That's not a big deal at all. It couldn't be less. I'm going to drop my phone. I need a little extra time, craft my tweet. For sure. Yeah. I'm trying to work. Slow down.

Give me a chance. Give me a chance. I felt that we were watching the Emmys last night. I was like trying to do tweets and things were already happening. It's just like you got to really be on your game. You need to infect the Emmys with slow play. Yeah. I need people to even longer speeches.

Nobody really got played off the stage last night. Really? Not really, no. Billy Porter went pretty long and they didn't even play them all. I didn't watch the Emmys. I went to sleep early because I was so upset about my phone. I really was. That happened yesterday?

Surprise you could fall asleep. You're all wired up like that. I know. The Emmys. Sunday scary is I can read about. The Emmys aren't that good. No, I've never watched. You know what the thing is?

They're doing this thing where all the award shows, there's no host. And then all they do is talk about how there's no host. Oh, that's stupid. Like that jokes are like, oh, there's no host. There's a whole buffet of bits. some people. So instead of the shitty host jokes, it's all shitty jokes about there being no host.

Correct. Dumb. Yeah. Why is there no host? It's like racial. Every time somebody gets picked to be a host, they dig through their tweets and it turns out they're a homophobic. Didn't that start with Kevin Hart?

Yeah. Not start, but it's like, it's not worth it to people. They like, if they pick somebody and you're like, yeah, I'm going to host the Emmys or like one of these awards shows,

which is a big deal. And then people are like, nope, 10 years ago, you said this. And it's like, it's just why. There's got to be people out there that, like, would want to still do it.

But maybe not famous enough to host a show. Right. Yeah, because the host, like, as soon as the choice is made, you get, they get scrutinized. They're not just the host, but even the event. How does that happen? Right. How does it only happen when you become a host? Like, these guys are, these people are celebrities.

So at some point, they're in the public eyes. So how come they don't point it out when they're, like, how come Kevin Hart's tweets didn't get pointed out when he was in a thousand movies and stand-up specials? It's a good question. The only time he went to go host like the Oscars, they're like, oh, you said something once. Yeah. It's a good question.

It is strange. It's like if Jimmy Fallon went to go do the Emmys, they'd be like, oh no, no, no, you tweeted something 10 years ago. It's like, this guy's on late night TV every single night. Yeah, but I think it motivates people to like research. You don't think people are research. I mean, yeah, I guess so.

I don't think people are just sitting around researching all of like Jimmy Fallon's tweets right now. Wow. It's a good question. I mean, I would guess at this point they have late night TV every single night. Jimmy Fallon's a pretty clean cut guy. Yeah. He gets drunk a lot.

Yeah, he does. That's the rumor. He cuts his hand open. Yeah, shit like that. I don't know. Ladies and gentlemen, we've all been there before. We have all had a round where we think we're going to shoot the round of our life. We're right there.

We're knocking the doorstep. And things just fall apart. I had two of them myself at Cabot twice. I thought I was going to break 80. Shot 81 both times. Just a collapse. One time I tripled 16, just from the middle of the railway. You don't have to tell me about melting down at the end of a round.

Oh, do you know anything? I know a little bit about it. You know, I shot this, you know, mythical and iconic round at Aaron Hills once. And I just, you know, went eight, nine. 17 and 18 and it just, you know, didn't break 100, shot 102, same score as you. You know, the point is that we're all looking for a little more. We're all looking to get a little better. There's always improvements to be made.

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Nelly Corta wins her first. I think it was our first European tour, ladies' tour event. She won by eight. Wow. One by eight. I was looking she was the high, I think she's like 15th in the world or something like that. She was the highest ranked player in the field. So it wasn't like all the LPGA tour ladies were going and playing this.

I kind of love this move. We've actually talked about this before about like some of the biggest stars in golf on the PJ tour and stuff should occasionally pick a, pick like a European tour event with like a weak field and just go over there and just fucking dust everybody. And that's exactly what she did. She legit Solheim Cup. She hung around. She's like, no, I'm going to play in this. What was it like the French Open or something like that? Lacoste Ladies French Open.

The LaCost Ladies French Open. And she went and just destroyed everybody at one by eight. Kind of like a big swinging dick move to just like, yeah, no, I'm going to. I, this American, like, badass lady golfer, I'm going to just stick around your guys' little continent here, and I'm going to go trounce the European tour. I like that a lot. And just showcase how much better we are in the real tour.

I ain't that smart. A win's a win. You kind of, you know, your brain sort of gets the feeling of winning. Totally. You beat, you still beat however many people are in the field. It's not like there's nobody in the field. There's still people who play golf for a living. So it's like, yeah, I got that win.

That's got to feel good. You get the endorphin rush. Maybe it sends you on the right path. Let me tell you this. Yeah, we play mensly. hockey. It's like me, YP, who we work with. Rudy's on the team. Rudy played Division 1 at Denver won like a national championship. We probably got like five Division one guys on our team. And now we're pretty like we have our attendance is suspect. So it's not

like it. But when everybody shows up and then we play one of the weak teams in our league, I mean, we just fucking trounce them. I can't tell you how good of a feeling it is. Yeah. I'm texting like, I'm texting people. I know like I had like four goals last night. I'm on cloud nine million. You don't think she's doing the same fucking thing. It's a great feeling it's an awesome feeling to go trounce people i'd be i'd watch out for nelly cord on the real tour yeah l pga tour going forward because when you get that kind of momentum you just dust people by eight shots that's genius that is like a method that i think everyone even on the men's store they should go find a tournament even i wouldn't we used to talk about like in the fall in these fall events like the

sanderson farms or whatnot if like tiger just showed up one year i was just destroyed everybody i was just looking at like what what event should tiger woods show up to and i think he should show up to the Portugal Masters. Okay. Oh, you're looking at the Earth. At Don Pedro, Victoria,

golf course, Velamora, Portugal. Do it. Like, if he just shows up, he's like, I heard some masters,

baby. Like, I just, I just fucking show up. He just treats it that way, always. He wears his green jacket. Yeah.

Makes Joey wear a white master's catty outfit. Like, if he just started randomly playing in any tournament called the Masters, yeah, Australian Masters,

like Portugal Masters and he just takes it dead seriously. The Omega European Masters. I mean, everything. I heard it's the Masters, baby. I think it's a good argument for, you know, if you don't want to go across the pond,

you go play in the John Deer Classic to any of the top 50 players out there that want to get a win under their belt, you know, a bit of a tournament that you could probably win because the field's not that deep. It's not even like this theory that we're even throwing out about how cool. Like they won't even entertain. They would rather go to Portugal. I'd rather Tiger play in the Turkish Airlines open.

If you don't want to do that, if you don't want to fly. He actually used to play in that. I feel like all that. Are you kidding me? They used to pay like a million dollars. What? He was always hitting T shots down like the bridge that like the Turkish airline open Istanbul and the Montgomery Max Royaleh,

or Antalaya Turkey. Those appearance fees get so outrageous he can't say no. He used to play in that shit all the time. Yeah. He would go do like Dubai and then he would do like Turkey. He'd play in these tournaments. It was like Tiger Woods's participation in the 2013 open Turkish Airlines. It's like I won the tournament two times over by just showing up.

The one in 2016 cost him like a year of golf. Because remember he flew over there And then he just like His back just couldn't recover Which was stupid, we knew We know, like don't get on that plane Do you played it like Torrey Pines

And he like was, didn't look great And then he just hopped on a plane to Dubai Got off and couldn't walk ever again Like that's like two plus two Oh I picked the wrong one to talk about They had a whole list of Which ended up then working out But it looked real dicey there for a while

And it was a stupid idea of how long is that flight 9000 hours I did it I've done it from New York You told me early on in the podcast, you did it, right? 15 and a half hours. Oh, what it was. I can't remember if it's one way it's like 15 and a half. The other way, it's like 12 and a half because you go with the wind against the wind.

Yeah. But yeah, it's a serious flight. I will say they're open bar. I flew Emirates, which is like I think always ranked like number one in the in the world for airlines. Yeah. Deservedly show. So it's like you, they have like this whole entertainments, even for like the peasant seats. Mm-hmm.

The common man seats. They, what do they call that? Economy. Yeah. Economy seats. They have like this whole entertainment, like whole entertainment system. We feel like you're almost in like a mini pod and then it's all open bar and all that. So it's not as bad as you think.

But you do. You go on a flight like that. You go through like three different days, basically. Like you're up, you watch a movie. You fall asleep for a couple hours. You wake back up. You kind of like, oh shit, I just woke up, watch another movie, go back to sleep, have a drink. It's a whole thing.

But you can get through it. You can get through it. You know who's going to be electric this year in October? Francesca Molinaari returning back to Rome for the Italian Open. Oh. Come on. Are you just deep in the European tour scheduling right now? Yeah.

Yeah. You're looking at like headline. What are you on their website? This is the, yeah, it's the European Tour.com, Italian Open. There's just a nice big picture of Francesca Molanari. All the Italian colors behind him. He's going home. He's going home.

Remember when we spoke to him? You didn't get any idea what the hell was going on? No. No, he had no idea. What the hell did we say to him? I don't remember. I think we talked to him about how he was going to walk into the British Open as like the the defending champion.

Yeah. We got a laugh out of him actually. He started kind of laughing like, yeah, I'm going to strut. That's right. The strut. We had, he has a strut. Yeah. Yeah, we said he's going to strut in there.

He said, I work on my strut. He was kind of like pissed because he had just like, I don't think finished strongly or whatever it was. Yep. He's kind of in a shit movie where he, and then he got thrown to us idiots. He's like, what the fuck? I still wish that we had a chance to talk to him after the PGA championship and ask him if he heard or how many times he heard Frankie Butternise and if he thought it was directed towards him.

because when we walked with him and Tiger, everyone in New York, like all the Stoolies that were there, it was Stoley Central at Beth Page. Everyone was screaming, Butter Nyes, Frankie Butter Nyes. And like, I could have sworn multiple times, he looked up and, like, nodded, like, with a smile.

Like, what the, you know? Yeah, he might have to know. What are these knives? That'll be a question. I mean... Well, now it's like there's no way he would ever remember. Yeah, it would be like a hot button issue. Like, just now you got off the golf course.

What are these butternines? You're like, I do not know. From the gallery, four play at BarcelonaSports. subject line from the gallery otherwise i will not read it make it short otherwise i will not read it uh brendt brand brendon asks a great question he says how many over par do you think you are in your life oh a lot i mean you're astronomical yeah but i think i'm probably way higher than you right way higher yeah just in terms of rounds yeah way higher yeah i don't even know where to start

I don't even know where to start So I'm doing like let's say It's true you're definitely way higher Way higher than all of you guys Because yeah It takes like two rounds equal Yeah for sure So I just did

Let's say I've played like let's say this year I'll play 75 rounds It's just a random guess It's a lot Let's say average like 10 or 12 over par A round You're looking at like 750 over par right there Damn

That number is huge It's a huge number Thousands overpals. Oh, yeah. Thousands. I almost got me thinking, like, I wonder how, if it would be impossible next year to keep track of how overpar we are for the year. It definitely is possible. You record every round.

You do, but you also, like, there's the scoring system. So you shave a couple shots off because of, like, if you make, like, a 10, like, your handicapped system, you don't want to make a certain high number and all that. But it's not like that. It wouldn't be that complicated to do. No. I feel like you just, like, some rounds would get lost in the, in the mix. here and there maybe but you're right in theory you post all your scores anyway so should be able to do it i'd be a really fun thing to do next year see how far see how over

par we are i think it's a great idea i think everyone should do it like i might be a thousand over part this year yeah really puts it in perspective you know and then the second part of his question was do you think tiger or another pro is under par for their lifetime definitely 100% i think tiger's like way under par for his lifetime i mean i wonder what he is under par on the pGA tour in his life i bet you can find out of How many under bar is Tiger Woods in PGA Tour career? Live Google. Live Google on the pod.

Yeah, I'd love to know that number. Somebody's better with stats than we are. You can probably figure this out. Oh, this is from 2013. Tiger Woods is nearly 2,000 strokes under bar as PJA Tour Career. Crazy. That's incredible. Yeah, this says Tiger Woods, this isn't, again,

This is from May 2013. Tiger Woods begins his 301st PGA tour event Thursday at the Memorial. Three Weeks chapter collecting a 78th PGA Tour victory. The Players Championship, World Number One is tantalizingly close to yet another monumental milestone. 2,000 strokes under par. So, yeah, I mean, he's, think about how low he goes in practice rounds. He's shooting like mid, low 60s all the time. Yeah.

He's got to be tens of thousands under par in his life. Here we are, thousands over part. Way over. Just. That's a mind-boggling stat that he's 2000. and under par. And, like, that's, I mean, tournament play.

Yeah, that's in tournament play. Like, think of how much better he is. Now, he has had, like, I wonder if he's,

you know, like this past year, I don't know that he was under par. Yeah, I bet he was. Yeah. Right? Like,

how many tournaments? Because even when he was, like, way over, he just missed the cut, right? Even if you're, like, four or five over. Right.

That almost. At a major, you just missed the cut. And then even at, like, some of these rinketing tournaments where he didn't win, he would post like six or seven under easily.

Yeah. Like, and then he win the Masters. What is he? 13 under the Masters or something like that. So I mean, yeah, got to be way,

way, way under par. I wonder how many, I wonder how many over we're going to be next year. Let's go to Baja Brad. Okay. That's how we wrote in.

I love this guy. He says, huge fan from Baja Mexico, right? Baja, that's how you say that? Yeah. From Baja Mexico.

First of all, I didn't. I mean, the fact that we've got listeners in Mexico. You know I love foreign listeners. Whatever he just makes me feel special, tingly like we're reaching like people that I never thought we would reach. So you're writing to me and you say we're big fans from Baja Mexico.

You're probably getting it on the show. My boys and I in San Diego play an executive course all the time, only $6, hour green fee and a free beer. That sounds fake life, but I love it. Wondering if one of us gets a hole in one will be considered legit. He says there's a minimum distance required. Is there a minimum distance required to be a valid ace? Most of these holes are 100 yards or more,

but some are under 100 yards. Keep up the good work. Vial a stool. P.S. Please shout out my Loma's Links boys. Done. There you go. It just happened.

$6. $6.00. Free beer. Oh, free beer. Where the fuck is this golf course, Baja Brad? San Diego, we got to go find this golf course.

Is that, is it Lomas Links? Lomas Links? Is that, yeah. I'm looking that up right now. Because if that's true, at some point, we will go play this golf course if it's $6, $6 green fee and a free beer.

But it does get to the point. And I, so we actually put out our video yesterday from the sandbox, which is San Valley's par three course, 17 hole part three course. There's holes on that course that are like 45 yards, 65 yards. There's a couple that are like 150 yards. It does become tricky of like where do you count a hole in one. If you get a whole one on like a 60 yard part three, do you really tell people that? I think, and I've said it many times on this show, that like, it just always comes with a story.

So it's like, oh, do you have a whole one? You'd be like, well, we were playing this part three course, 65 yards, I canned it. I don't know. What do you think? It's pretty much the way that you addressed it. Lomas Santa Fe Executive Golf Course, Solana Beach, California. We got to go play there now.

Yep. We have to go play there. Does this say anything about $6 in a free beer? I don't know. I actually haven't even clicked on that website. Doesn't it say anything about the free beer? I don't think he would lie, though. I don't think Baja Brad's lying.

No, that's not the name of a person who had voted one of the top short courses by Golf Range Magazine. It's got to be it. The past two years. Here's my promise to you. If we're in the San Diego area, what do you mean it's not in? If we're in the San Diego, he said it's a short course, so I don't know how it wouldn't be it. If we're in the San Diego area, we will be going and making our way to this golf course. Yep.

There's no doubt about that. Great short course. If it's a short course and it's got Baja Brad and all of his boys at it, we're going to go play. What are you looking at, Frankie? What's going on here? Can we get some communication? Well, so, no, Andrew showed me like a thing on the website that says, like, the prices are like $28 to $30. So he may have been off with the $6.

Yeah, but this could be like a Thursday night deal or something like that. Yeah, it could definitely, it's got to be it. If it's the executive course, it says Lomas links, that's absolutely got to be it. So anyways, that's my commitment. We will definitely go to this place if we go to San Diego. Shout out to Baja Brad and the boys. Love that. Mexico fans.

Great stuff. Tyler says he's in the Oakley store. looking at polo shirts, he said, the guy working came over and asked if he played golf ball. Golf ball? That's a guy just doesn't know the sport. Like I played football or something. I rolled and said, yes, I play golf. He proceeded to tell me he hit a 65 on one of the toughest courses in the area.

I put the shirt on the rack and walked out of the store. Yeah, it's an infuriating human being. I mean, golf ball is not. Golf ball's not even close. No. He probably saw a touchdown during the baseball game, too. Nice. you roast that guy

You put him right through the ring Fuck that guy Golf ball You totally buried that guy Hit a 65 I wanted to go ahead No you didn't I guess stinks

Oh you buying a shirt for golf ball The guy put the shirt on the rack And just walked out Brayton Brayton says good news for Frankie Our golf league the other night We were playing some older guys In their 60s

One of them said he's made Three aces in his life Two left handed and one right-handed Whoa Mine was blown He's got to be in a group Of many people who can say They've made one from both sides

It's got to be maybe 100 in the world, 50, 10, blah, blah, he thinks it's insane. Frankie, my question is, are you still thinking about putting right-hand? Yes. Well, putting with a right-handed putter with a lefty grip, cross-grip. Oh, right, so you're going with the speed, but you are going to put right-handed. I'm going to try it. Wow. I'm going to try it big time.

When are you going to try? I mean, I'm going to work it out. I'm going to try and go to like whenever I'm freaking home or I can get to a putting green, I'm going to go do it. I mean, I'm not going to go on to a golf course and do it while I'm trying to, like, while I'm trying to, like, post a score because, like, you only have so many rounds left. So I'm going to do it while I practice. That's probably a good point.

Which I don't have much time. I was going, like, if we were going on, like, a golf trip next week, you're not putting right hand. No. What are you insane? Really? Yeah, I can't. I just can't do it. See, I'm interested.

See, that always intrigues me because it's like. I've never hit a put that way. Yeah, but it's like, if you're going to do it, just do it. I gotta get a I mean like maybe I don't know like roll a few puts before and then you just hope I'd have to like carry two putters Is that legal as long as you have as many

14 14 clubs carry two putters I don't have the guy carries four putters What? Yeah he only uses one on the 18th green What do you mean he carries four? It's like a hockey stick butter like from happy Gilmore And he only uses it on the 18th three What does it do with the other three?

Use it when he feels like it What? He's not very good That's his strategy Why doesn't he carry two putters one of them being the 18th hole one. We call him the wizard. You guys allow him to do this?

Oh, yeah. He doesn't have too many clubs in his bag. He carries four putters. Why? I don't know. That's astonishing. He legit, first time I ever met him was a buddy's golf trip. It's like, you know, 10 on 10 or something like that, Rider Cup style.

And I'm playing in a match against him. And we're chatting, chit-chat and having a good time. And he starts telling me on like the turtle. He's like, oh, yeah, check out my bag. And a bunch of every putters. I was like, oh, that's amazing. I was like, what if this one is like a hockey. stick putter from happy good one goes oh yeah that's the i always use that of the 18th creed

is that a regular are you allowed to use that i i wasn't in the business i'm asking jett i want to know yeah if rory pulled out like his hockey stick 18th hole putter at the masters you think he's allowed to do that like rory starts walking up there like what is that he's like oh no this is just my 18th hole putter i don't know i don't know i wonder if the the putter from happy gilmore is regulation i think it probably is why wouldn't i don't know i don't know either i don't know what like technically is conforming and what is i have no idea i don't know i don't know what like technically is i have no idea. Yeah.

Especially on a putter. Yeah. Like on a driver, I get CCs and this and that, but like on a putter, if it's like, you can roll the rock. Yeah. Go for it. Yeah. We beat him like on like the 12 hole in that man.

Yeah. I mean, he dusted that guy. Yeah. The wizard. Great guy. hilarious guy. Trent, do you remember a couple weeks ago when I said I tried to cook? Yes, I do.

How many times I've tried to cook since then? I'm going to say zero. Zero. Yeah. You know why? It's hard. It's incredible. I mean, that's what it is.

I was so succinct and correct. It's just. It's really hard. It is. It's hard. It's just, there's a lot going on. Then you've got to clean up afterwards. DoorDash.

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from the App Store, enter promo code 4. You're going to get $5 off your first order of $15 or more with code 4. Corey says you got an idea for a future video. Said the 4-Play for some against in a scramble, playing a scramble against Matthew Fitzpatrick. Who wins? I think we would win, right?

Yeah. And there's four-man scramble? Yeah. Yeah, you got to think we're like 10 under par. Like whenever you play in a scramble, you're always like 10, 11 under par. That's what I would think. You're not, you're definitely not bogeing many holes. I don't think we're making any bogeys really.

Right, you have a birdie chance almost every hole. You should have a good birdie look at every hole and four puts at it. I think we would dust him. I think we have to do it. I would love to beat him up after. Yeah. Push him around. Jump him on the 18th.

I think all four of us could definitely beat him up. I would say if we... I mean, Lurch is huge. if we win you get to fight you get to beat him up frankly yeah with the tie his arms behind yeah that's what that's gonna say yep and then you get to like you get like big pillowy you get to just kind of like clock him a few times and if we lose he gets to beat you up i like it i don't know if he's gonna agree because i'm with you guys i think we dust him i think he would agree that he would i guess what i'm thinking i maybe we're giving us out of 63 like if you're playing a tough golf course

scramble like and we don't make many puts i think we could we could shoot like four or five or six under and he could easily do that. But I think an average day out there, four-minute scramble, like we should be getting close to 10 under at least. Right. With four people taking hacks at it, you would assume we're all going to have, like, a good drive. Like, not all of us, but we're going to have a good drive.

And then, like, from there, I mean, you're a pretty good iron player. Lurch is a good iron player. Like, you're always going to be peppering. Par fives we're going to hit, like, every one of them up or near it and two. We get four chips at it or four eagle putts. Like, there's no way we don't shoot around eight or ten hours. I know, there's no way. So he'd have to play lights out to even have a chance.

So I think he would know that too. At the Borrelli's gal founding, like with me, my dad and like his friends would go like eight and nine under. Right. And I think like we got, I mean, we get churped for how bad we are. We're like relatively speaking. We got some decent golfers in our in our podcast. Tommy says, congrats in all your success. Success love the pod.

Thank very much. My brother was 10. He was playing with my dad. Hit his first shot on a part three, went in the water. Second shot went in the hole. He was 10. So the rangers said give it to him as a hole in one. We're now in our mid-20s.

and he claims he's the only one in the family with a whole and one. My dad, other brother and I give him shit to this day. We'd love to hear what you guys think. Whole on one or a simple par. He said, P.S., thanks for taking care of the boss man. You're welcome, Tommy.

I mean, obviously doesn't count. It's like you got to treat this like Santa Claus. Yeah, at some point, at some point, the parents need to sit down with him and say, hey son,

when you were this little idiot 10-year-old, we, to keep your mind straight, and psyche and positive and all that. So he didn't cry like a little brat. Correct. Like a little bitch boy. We told you it was a whole one. The Ranger was in on it.

But now that you're a real person, that was a whole and three. I like that. I see that they give a part. Good job. I see that they give him shit about it, which is funny. But I wish that they had kept it as like the family secret.

So every time even in his 20s when he brags about it, they're just sitting at the dinner table. Everybody's just like, everybody looks down and they don't say anything. Yeah. And it tears the family apart at some point. Yeah, it'd be great. Or he realizes it's like what do you got smirking?

at. Yeah. And a fight breaks out. And they're like, it wasn't real. You don't have one. That's what I'm picturing. You know,

my brother and sister, you should always tell me I was a mistake. Wow. Oh, shit. They were very mean to me. So my,

are you the youngest? Mom and dad fucked and didn't try to have you. Are you the youngest? By far. Yeah, I'm the youngest, too. My brother and sisters would do that to me all the time.

Oh, man. They were so mean. You were a mistake. So my sister's five years older and my brother's four years older. And then there's a four years older. your gap obviously and then me yeah so whenever like my brother and sister were babysit me you know

like finally got to the age where they would babysit me and they learned from my cousins who were very mean to them to be mean to me yep so they would do awful things to me and one of the main things would they convince me that a either i was a mistake or that i was the only child that was adopted my my dude my my brother and sister would do the exact same thing you know how i was a huge baby and i was on the front of the local newspaper my brother and sister were convince me like no no they did that to convince you that you weren't adopted my brother and sister did to the same thing to me that they did to you they would convince me that i was adopted you're like but i have this picture like no no no that was that was a step yeah we ever seen

trumintraud they're just messing with you like they're just trying to make it seem like you like there's where there's no doubt like that could be any baby in that picture my sisters never said that shit to me man really i always had the story that like my parents had to have me because is my grandfather, Frank Borelli, senior, needed a third Frank, like needed the family name to go along. So he like, like they had two daughters and like,

he's like, you need to have another one. And if that's a daughter, you have another one. Like, you just keep going until you have a son that can name Frank Borelli the third. How does that make you feel?

Do you feel like you were the chosen one? Yeah. Yeah. For sure. We were the opposite. We were literally the chosen because they chose us when we got adopted.

Correct. That's exactly. Like our actual parents, like, didn't want us. I carry on the name. Frank Joseph Borrelli III. Yeah, but no, you're not. With Borrellys? With the restaurant itself. Well, you should have just ended up on, you should have ended up on like the floor,

like your mom's back or something. That's what your siblings used to say. Yeah, my siblings would say that I was adopted, and they would say that I was going to grow up and live in a pillowcase. In a pillowcase? I don't know why that was the day. Were you scared of a pillowcase? No, they were just, I think they said that was going to be my home.

I wasn't going to have an apartment or I wasn't going to be able to afford a morgan. How big is your, how big was your pillowcase? I mean, definitely not that big. They said you're going to grow up to live in a regular size pillowcase. Man, this would be hard to get it out of Trent Day. It's tough growing up. What's the last time you thought about that? This, this just like string like a memory from the back when he said that his brother and sister used to be really mean to him, the pillowcase thing instantly came into my mind.

I knew I knew I was going to share the adopt. option being on the front of the paper thing. I didn't know if I was going to go pillowcase, but here we are. So then to get, you know, to get my payback, I would, like, if I heard my brother and I would always play NHL against each other. And if I could, if I heard my mom walking by the stairs upstairs, I would just start screaming, Mom! My brother wouldn't even do anything.

Yeah. Mom would come down. Kyle, you little shit. And he'd get in trouble. He'd get putting time out for like an hour. He wouldn't even have touched me. The reason, the reason your brother and sisters older are to be. mean to you when you're the youngest is because

your parents like you. They're the favorite. Oh yeah. So they're, they're resentful and bitter about you getting your way all the time. They thought I was the most spoiled little shithead in the world. Exactly.

Oh, yeah. So they tell you you're adopted. You're going to live in a pillowcase when you grow up. One time, too, they, I was obviously super afraid of like storms in the dark because I was fucking young. They tied me to a chair. Oh, my God.

In the basement. In the basement? In the basement? Well, because they were babysit for it. Yeah. In the basement. tied me to a chair with like, it was like extreme lightning outside. I could see it through like the basement windows

that are at the ceiling, you know what I'm saying? Yep. And I was so rattled that I rocked the chair over, fell, hit the back of my head on the concrete and split my head open. And they convinced me to lie about how it happened. And I did. Yeah.

I lied and said we were playing like floor hockey in the basement and I like was backing up and fell into the wall. Reality I was tied to a fucking chair. Holy. I was so rough. Reality. Oh, there was an episode of 24. 24 and you were in the basement.

They were so mean to me. We come a long way. Yeah, no, that's just how it is. When you're the youngest, your siblings are mean. Exactly. Worst thing that happened to me when I was growing up is my sisters tried to do like a backstreet boys dance. And I was like really young and they wanted a, there's a move where like the backstreet boys would pull one of the guys in between their legs and flip them. Yeah.

I remember that. Remember that move? Yeah. So they tried to do that and they just dropped me on my head. Damn. Like I got flown through the air. I did a spin and then I landed on my head. My mom and dad are like, what did you think was going to happen?

Like, did you think the four-year-old was going to land this fucking incredibly difficult answer? That the backstreet boys probably practiced a lot. My sister Jenna just like pulled me between her legs and just went to foop and just flung me up and I just landed on my head. Do you know what move I'm talking about? I do. Yeah. They like, they like, I'm sorry. You step over and then they go up and you like.

Yes. Yes. Yeah. I remember that. My sisters used to dress me up as a girl. Like how dressed up are we talking? Make up? Make up.

You were lipstick in the eye shadow. Are you not going to bring that out? I don't know how deep we were on. I didn't know. But I figured if we're all sharing, this is kind of a nice moment for the show. I figured I'd really, I'd really.

I'd really take it. What happened? We'd be wearing any skirts? Oh, yeah, I'd be wearing a dress, yeah. What? Tread comes, how old are you? Tread comes walking out of the room. He's just in a dress, just like, all right.

Am I beautiful? Tell me I'm beautiful. Oh, man, that's funny shit. Ooh, wee. I was not right. I don't remember how old I was. I don't know, but it was, I just remember. I remember that was the thing.

I have we got through that, man. It's tough growing up, you know. Being the youngest. I don't know why I picture like this age Trent, like a little version, but you still have like the goate and you're like walking out and you're walking out. I can't imagine young Trent. I just have current Trent as a girl. I don't know, like seven, seven, eight. I don't know how old.

That mess you up with you. you go to school like man oh like man like like like Friday night like Friday like like Friday at school the bell's ringing you're like man I'm gonna be a girl in about six hours no I don't think I don't know how regular this is this is I'm not gonna be wearing these clothes in about three hours I'm not gonna be wearing a dress maybe in my head I was like I don't want to go home my head I was like I can't wait I want to slip into something comfortable I want to look beautiful someone's like Trent you're ugly he's like You should see me on the weekends, buddy.

Wait four hours, buddy. Wait four hours. Wait until I slip into my nice little dress. Holy shit, man. I did not think we were, I was going to bring that out of today. You ever know, man. You just don't know. These early morning shows get weird.

Yeah, they do. 8.17 on a Monday. Who, talking about cross-dressing. Baby trip. Wow, that's funny shit. Baby trick, cross-dress. Wow. I think we're going to end it on that.

That's a really good way to end it. We got to go. We're going to go play in this, uh, in this new Amsterdam. Yeah, I'm just missing this golf out. I think it's pretty fucking horrible. Yeah. Frankie, you really got screwed. You just can't.

We're going to play golf all day and get paid. So you guys have a victory there and I'm going to end this show on a little victory from me because I got tagged in it. I got DM like you wouldn't believe. It's a huge victory for me. The tap water causes cancer. We're not going to talk about it. I don't know if you guys saw this stuff.

I got tagged in that all weekend. Contaminants in tap water could have caused over 100,000 cancer cases. A toxic cocktail of chemicals have been found in U.S. drinking water. So that's just a huge victory for your boy for not drinking stuff that just gives you cancer. You're drinking liquid toxic. Toxic chemicals. I saw that. I saw that. I, uh, you know, we were getting tagged to Bolivian. I mean, my DMs were flooded, flooded with the same image of this tap water going into a fucking cup. It says, it's cancer. Fox News put it out. Yeah. Yeah. I got the same thing all weekend. I mean, just feels good.

I will say, I will say this. I meant to do some research and find I was going to spin zone this and find somewhere where like bottled water got contaminated with like feces or something like that. I totally forgot to do it. So my promise to you is next show I will have done my research and I will spin zone this. But right now it's a win for you. Thank you. Big win.

Have fun golfing. We're going to have fun golfing. I can't wait. You neither. Is this a scramble or are you guys playing your own bowl? I don't know. I don't know. We're showing up.

I will say it's going to be really nice to play in someone else's golf outing. Because we put on eight of these now this year, putting on our own tournaments and walking around and driving around those damn things and not being able to play. So just, now I just show up and it's just like supposed to be fun for me. It's very exciting. Yeah. Oh, man, I can't believe I'm not going on this.

It would have been so easy. I could have been on Long Island. It's right by my house. Glenn Oaks. Could have stayed in Long Island last night. You know? Maybe had a little dinner at Borrellys. Instead, you're just not.

We're doing a pretty big pizza review, though. We've got Bobby Filet. Wow. So it's like when you have a guy that's like so well renowned in the food industry, you have to like, wow. We couldn't resort to like the backups for the pizza review game. It's got to be the 18. Yeah. You got to be there.

And we're going to a place in which like they're opening up for us because like we want to bring Bobby Flay to a good pizza place. And there's a place that we know of that is now serving pizza at their restaurant. And like they only open at 4 o'clock, which usually shows that like it's a really good pizza place. If they're open at 4. And the guy's going to get there a little early and make the pie for us, which is also a struggle because like you have to make sure. here that you're not giving them an unfair review. You're not like sugar-coting their review because they did this stuff. You have to still be very fair.

Right. And I think Bobby Flee, I mean, Dave is always fair with that stuff. But I think Bobby Flee will be like, all right, you know, I understand you did a nice thing for us. But I'm going to grade your pizza now. Totally. Which I'm going to, I'm going to like hope. Because that's what Dave does every time. Right.

Now it is tough. Like, the guy does something for you. But, you know, that's what separates the amateurs from the pros. Exactly. You know? I think you're right. You're missing it for a good reason today. You're missing.

I would have loved to play golf day. drinking New Amsterdam vodka for a good reason I want to say something to Bobby Flea about like entourage what they used to say to him like the chef or the cook member he was like fucking he was fucking Ari Gold's

like wife yeah he was they used to say something about Bobby Flea he used to like say something was like a word what the hell did he used to say I don't know I wish I knew damn whatever save for the next show

all right God what a shit Wow, that was funny shit, man. We'll be back on Thursday. Hit it hard. Hit it hard. I'd like to finish by saying thank you to Trent Daddy for that all-time moment. Thank you to Spring Golf.

Our sponsors, $10 in credit, $10 towards Cowley Golf gear. You go to springgolf.com slash barstool. New Amsterdam vodka, Pink Whitney, go find yourself some. If they don't have it at your local liquor store, tell them to get it in. Curated, okay? They're going to curate you. They're going to get you set up. They're going to help you out, expert on your clubs.

Curated.com slash Foreplay. You enter coupon code for play at checkout. You are going to get $50 off orders $250 or more. And DoorDash, no need to cook. That's just a waste of time. You're going to hurt yourself. You could burn your house down. You don't want to do that.

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