Free With Ads - Practical Magic
Episode Date: October 29, 2024For the final Free With Ads Hallow-Peen celebration, we all watched the 1998 classic Practical Magic, staring Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman as two very 90's witches.Jordan Morris will be at Revenge... of Comics and Pinball on November 2nd for the Creators Block Party featuring such luminaries as Patton Oswalt, Jordan Blum, Josh Gad, Jesse Thorn, Elliot Kalan, and so much more! Find out more here!Also, Jordan will be at the Berkeley Public Library ComicCon on Novmber 9th! At 11am he will doing a panel at the second floor Mystery Room. Find more info at BerkeleyPublicLibrary.comVisit Emily's ETSY store right now and buy some stuff! Great for holiday shopping!
Transcript
Discussion (0)
This This is Free With Ads, the podcast that asks the question, why pay Disney Plus 10 bucks
a month for nine episodes of Agatha all along when you can go online for free and watch
a Witch Coven story that doesn't require you to remember what happened in Wand Division,
Doctor Strange and the Multiverse of Madness, Avengers Infinity War, Avengers Endgame,
Avengers Age of Ultron, and 90 years of Marvel comics,
I'm Jordan Morris.
And I'm Emily Fleming.
Today's movie is Practical Magic,
the 90s supernatural rom-com family drama
that's got more seasonal cozy vibes
than a pumpkin spice weighted blanket.
Ooh.
And with us always is super producer Matt
hitting us with those sweet drops.
Yeah.
Pfft.
Pfft.
Pfft.
Pfft.
Plops.
Beautiful.
Breath of plops back.
This is our final episode of Howl O Peen,
our dive into the world of free spooky movies,
where we'll probably make jokes about that dangly
sex organ sometimes referred to as the peen.
Before we get into this movie, which is as of this
recording, streaming free with ads, let's talk about
something else we saw for free on the internet this week.
Other free stuff.
Thank you.
As y'all might know, I really love and get a lot of
inspiration from the career of Bobby Boris Pickett,
the guy who wrote the Monster Mash,
who wrote and performed the Monster Mash.
You know, this guy had this giant hit,
a monster hit if you will, and then just leaned in.
This guy wrote so many fucking monster songs, it's crazy.
Albums and albums of songs, just like,
rehashing
and reshuffling the Monster Mash
for all these various holidays.
There's like a Monster Beach song,
there's a Monster Christmas song,
but also like when a new trend would surface,
he would do like a version of that,
but for the Monster Mash.
And a lot of these were kind of like lost to time,
but I guess his estate or someone affiliated with him
has kind of a newish YouTube channel
where they're like uploading all his songs,
really nice versions of them,
and they're all so much fun and they're all so funny,
and I just wanted to play
for our final Halloween episode this year,
his 80s take on the Monster Mash, the Monster Rap.
So yeah, he recorded this in the 80s
when hip hop was a hot new trend
and he decided that the monsters needed
to get in on the act. The kites went up without a hitch, then Igor screamed.
I'll pull this witch!
The goat came down, his head went zap.
Now he's doing the monster rap.
Shock the body, shock the body body, shock the body, shock the body body, shock the body, shock the body body, shock.
I've given you a voice, now rap for daddy.
When I shot a million bolts, it hit in my brain, now rap for daddy. I wear the shot of million bones,
you're in my brain now ready to run.
Oh my god, it's horny.
No rap for daddy.
I love it.
This is kind of fire, dude.
This is fire.
Right?
First of all, shock the body.
Shock the body.
Body is fucking catchy.
That's a great hook.
I just am trying to find out where the hip hop was.
It was all over.
That was born in the streets.
Rap for daddy.
Yes, rap for daddy.
Where does daddy fit in the monster mesh?
Yeah, I guess just he's making it very literal.
He's the daddy of the monsters.
He's the daddy of all the monsters.
OK, OK.
I was like, yeah, you got a vampire, you got a mummy,
and then daddy is there.
Yeah, I guess in this, he's making it very literal,
the symbolism that Dr. Frankenstein is the monster's father figure.
Yes, yes, okay.
Put it up for daddy.
Well yes, Bobby Boris Pickett, a legend,
he's got a monster song for every holiday.
Hey, we're gonna-
Is he still kickin'?
No, he is not still kickin'.
No! He's with the monsters now.
Well, RIP buddy.
I hope that you're listening to this from beyond the grave.
Yes, partying in hell.
With all of your favorite monsters.
That's really good, Jordan.
Thank you.
I do a pretty good Bobby Boris picket.
Did not help a lot on my SNL audition.
They said, you know, we're looking for current celebrities and politicians.
Yeah, that's what they said to Bill Hader when he brought in an Alan Alda.
Like I always wonder.
Okay, works alright for Bill Hader.
Maybe I just need to keep pushing my Bobby Boris picket.
You do. I think you do.
I've got an okay Jennifer Tilly apparently.
Okay. Can you do, can you, can you, uh...
Well, I don't know because I...
Can you say rap for daddy is Jennifer Tilly?
Uh, rap for daddy.
That was good.
Thank you.
I wonder what it would be like
if Jennifer Tilly met Bobby Boris Pickett.
Hmm, I bet that'd be a funny situation.
Spooky.
Well, hey, we're sorry in advance
when we have to end this podcast
to go on Saturday Night Live.
It'll just take up too much of our time.
The Bobby Boris Pickett and Jennifer Tilly sketches
that they're gonna want us to do every single week.
Hey, we're gonna talk about our final Howl-O-Pean movie,
Practical Magic, but before we start talking about
this movie, we should mention that it does include
partner violence as part of the plot,
so if that's not something you wanna hear about,
we're gonna play a little music and give you a chance
to find another episode. ["Practical Magic"]
We're back, it's Free With Ads.
We're talking about Practical Magic.
Yeah, maybe a little bit of context
before we get into the movie.
I had never seen this before.
This was my first time.
Really?
Yeah, yeah.
And I guess my knowledge about it going in was this.
Kind of a minor hit.
It has Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman,
but it really stuck around on cable.
It stuck around on DVD.
And now it is just this like cult hit,
and I guess they just like announced the sequel, right?
Yes, they did, which I'm like,
so I also forgot that Evan Rachel Wood
played one of the daughters, like Sandra Bullock's daughters,
so I'm like, is she gonna be in it?
That would be so cool, I don't know.
I'm very excited to see it,
and Stockard Channing is still with us and kicking ass,
so she better be in it.
She's an icon in this movie too.
Do we know anything about who's writing it
and directing it, or are there any plot details?
I have not looked into that.
I guess I'm kind of a little scared
it's gonna be not good.
I'm scared about that, so I'm like not looking at it.
Yeah, like what are the good,
what are the good like Lego sequels?
What are the good sequels that came, you know,
like 20, 30 years after the actual movie?
I actually- Gladiator 2.
Gladiator 2's gonna be it.
Everyone's saying it's good.
Everyone's saying it's really good, yeah.
Everyone said Beetlejuice was good,
and then I saw it and they were wrong.
I have not seen Beetlejuice yet
I'm super curious, but uh, no good didn't like it didn't like it
Not the right movie to do in 4dx either because it was like no, there's no wrong movie to do in 4dx
It's bad. You know like like sprayed
No, I was like sprayed and I was one of five people in the theater.
That's funny.
Like no one was there and you just, there's something really funny about a bunch of empty
chairs just shaken like back and forth.
No one's in it.
Yeah, there would be like a scene where someone's riding a bicycle on the sidewalk and you are
just getting whiplash in your chair and you're like, what is this enhancing? I don't know what this is.
I can't wait for all those 4D theaters,
the theaters with the chairs that shake
and the hoses that spray you during the movie.
I can't wait for Oscar season,
where they have to do that for whatever this year's...
Megalopolis.
Yeah, Megalopolis.
Whoa!
I feel like I'm in the chariot with wow platinum.
I'm there with, God what's Adam Driver's character's name?
How would we know?
How would we know?
We've all seen it right?
We've all gone to, we all.
Absolutely not.
I did go to see it.
No, I haven't seen it.
Caesar Catalina I believe is his name.
Caesar Catalina.
Oh my God, that's his name?
I know, yeah I mean George Lucas and Francis Forde, Caesar Catalina, I believe is his name, Caesar Catalina. Oh my God, that's his name?
I know, yeah, I mean,
George Lucas and Francis Ford Coppola are friends.
I feel like Francis Ford Coppola looked at
the Star Wars names and said, hold my beer.
I can give some people some dumb ass fucking names.
Hold my wine that I make in my vineyard.
Yeah, hold my canned wine. Hold my canned wine that I make in my vineyard. Yeah, hold my canned wine.
My canned wine that I apparently sold
to have enough money to make this incoherent mess.
Wait, he sold his winery?
I think he sold a steak in the winery to make that movie.
Yeah, so I think Coppola Wine is now in other hands.
And, but on the plus side, the world has Megapolis,
the story of Caesar Catalina,
where John Voight tells Aubrey Plaza to look at his boner
and then pulls the sheet aside to reveal a tiny bow and arrow,
which he shoots her with and kills her with one shot.
Actually, something that happens in that movie.
I...
At this point, I'm not convinced he made the Godfather.
Maybe he did.
I know. There's no way. At this point, I'm not convinced he made the Godfather. Maybe he did.
I know.
There's no way.
He can't have.
He can't have made it.
I'm just glad that you don't see John Voight's penis.
I'm just relieved to hear that.
Yeah, you do for a second think he's gonna
move the sheet to reveal.
Even Coppola knows you'd rather die.
Than see a Republican's penis.
Oof.
What kind of Sores and Legions must be on that thing?
A Republican's penis?
What kind of...
Hey, but hey, we...
Listen, Megapolis, not a classic.
This movie is a classic.
I think it's a classic, this movie, this movie is a classic.
Yeah, I guess when they put it on HBO Max,
it immediately became the number one movie.
So people love this thing.
Yeah, let's.
It didn't get great reviews when it first came out.
Yeah, I think kind of a disappointment at the time,
but just one of those movies that stuck around.
I just know that all the girls that I was growing up with,
because this came out in 98, so I was like 12,
which is the perfect age to see this movie.
Being 12 in the 90s and seeing this was like,
oh my God, I'm a witch.
Did you go to see it in the theater?
I don't remember if I saw it in the theater,
but I do know I've probably seen it about 30 times.
Okay, wow. I love this movie.
I watch it every year. I've watched it three times times. I love this movie. I watch it every year.
I've watched it three times this year.
No, three.
Probably gonna watch it a fourth time.
Is it a seasonal thing?
Is it like as soon as the leaves start to turn?
I mean, I know that doesn't actually happen in LA, but like.
It is, it really is.
Myself and Jenna Purdy and Laura Morton,
we like get together, watch Practical Magic.
They have like a jar of movies.
We have a jar with movies written down and pull one out.
No, that's fun.
And then sometimes we'll just keep pulling them
till we find Practical Magic.
We want an excuse to do Midnight Margaritas.
Yeah, honestly, yeah.
Because you can't do it unless they're
doing it in the movie anyway.
Yes.
So yeah, let's start talking about this thing.
We open on an old timey pilgrim village
and they're hanging a witch
and she has the gift of magic, says the narrator,
and the witch kind of steps off the hanging platform
and we see the rope break
and then all the villagers like scatter in fear.
This, I was a little, do you think there was supposed
to be a special effect here and they just cheaped out
because the rope breaking doesn't seem like it would tear.
I was wondering why everyone was terrified
of the rope breaking.
Well, I think it just confirmed that she was a witch
and she was gonna come for all of them because they were all like really getting off on her dying. Yeah
They were all excited about it those those Puritans love to hang a witch. They love to hang a witch
Yeah, all she did was like, you know, fuck other people's husbands
Yeah, that's what she's being hanged for they go to pretty much
But they love a lot of close-up shots of angry pilgrim wives during this.
Yeah, the men were all like, oh yeah.
So she is pregnant and she goes to live on an island and her lover never comes. And this
is like part of a curse. This is part of a curse on their family. That their family line
cannot fall in love
without some sort of horrible tragedy happening.
There's a lot of time jumping in this.
We go to, then we go to kind of like the mom
of the main characters, the main characters
who will be Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kitman.
And she, her husband dies and then she dies
and it's all kind of portended by a beetle, a
creepy clicking beetle that is kind of the harbinger of the curse.
And then the two girls, the two sisters go to live with their magical witch aunts, played
by Stockard Channing and Diane Weist.
This is just this plot of Sabrina the Teenage Witch.
This is a pretty one for one lift.
Sabrina going to live with two magical aunts.
Anyway.
I didn't even really put that together.
I think that everything in this movie
is like a power of twos.
Like there's kind of a,
Sandra Bullock has two daughters.
One of them is, you know, kind of,
they're all like replications of each other.
Yeah.
The line.
So, yeah. And then if you do three witches, then it's Hocus Pocus. And, you know, sure, can't can't copy everybody.
You got to do five witches. I'm sorry.
Sabrina has two ads. There's three Hocus Pocus.
You got a four or above. I'm sorry.
Let's have an original number of witches, people.
Yeah. Instead of a cat, you have to have a bunch of lizards.
We can't do any, you know.
Thank you.
No problem.
So we should say, you know, this movie kind of,
not great reviews at the time, Middling Blocks Office,
but Stockard Channing, who plays one of the ants,
did win a Blockbuster Entertainment Award
for her performance.
Really?
Yeah, Blockbuster Video had an award show for a while.
What?
I had no idea.
Stalker Channing won like something for this.
I don't know, best actress.
She's very good.
Both her and Diane Weiss are really good.
I want all of the outfits that Stalker Channing wears
are exactly what I will start dressing like
in about 15 years.
That is big hats.
Why wait?
Start now.
Get giant hats.
Listen, the titties are still up.
We're not covering them up for a while.
It's like the legs of the titties are going to be out for 15 years and then everything
goes into like closing sale.
You need a hat so big people can't see the titties.
Yeah, exactly.
I will say, yes, as we mentioned, Stalker Channing and Dionne Weist
dressed very outrageously in it.
A lot of giant hats.
I think these hats are great for the characters.
I think just technically we have to hear the worst hat sting,
even though I feel positively about the hats.
OK, well, play it anyway just because I just very much disagree.
I think they're good hats.
I'm saying I think they're good hats,
but I'm saying, you know.
We have to, yeah.
Sure, thank you.
Great for the character,
but man these are some giant hats.
And they have like, in some scenes they have big
like vaginal Georgia O'Keeffe flowers on them.
Yeah, it's true.
So yeah, we see the two girls,
they're all like eating outside,
they're kind of like learning the like,
learning the ins and outs of being a witch.
I just wrote in my notes, cat on the table,
there's a cat on the table, yay.
I'm always like, is this my favorite movie now?
I see what everybody's so crazy about,
there's a cat on the table,. There's a cat on the table.
Yay.
Love that cat on the table.
I know.
There's another good cat that appears
at the end of the movie that Nicole Kidman's carrying.
It's like a black cat.
I think that's supposed to be the cat from the table.
Oh, it's a good black cat.
I love black cats.
My childhood cat Lucky was a black cat.
Aw.
Very nice.
Yeah, my sister's cat Frankie.
Oh yeah.
We all love Frank.
Good old Frankie.
Shout out to my nephew Frank.
A legend, Frankie's a legend.
He is a legend.
So we cut to a time when I think Sandra Bullock
and Nicole Kidman are supposed to be teenagers.
A lot of time jumping in this,
a lot of unclear time jumping.
The teenager scene was pretty funny because it's like they just put big dumb glasses on
Right Sandra Bullock to make her look kind of nerdy and it was like we got a 40 year old woman and some glasses cool
What is going on here? Like yeah?
Yeah, so like Nicole Kidman's running away with this dude.
She throws an army sack of clothes over the balcony
to run away with this dude.
That's just showing their character.
Nicole Kidman is the impulsive wild child.
Sandra Bullock just wants to be normal.
She says it many times, she just wants to be normal.
So Nicole Kidman leaves home to party.
Sandra Bullock stays in their like hometown
And meets a very handsome man who works at the farmers market. Hey, I think it's time for hunk watch
It's hunk watch
I really liked this
Nameless characterless man that played her husband who spoiler alert will go on to die
He just he seemed really nice.
And he's definitely from, he's definitely a guy
from that thing.
I didn't, I couldn't clock the actor.
But.
He was in some kind of, oh God, you know,
what's the channel that Suits is on and Burn Notice?
USA. USA. USA Network.
They were, it was Royal Pains, I think is the name
of the show that he was in. But yeah, he's definitely h Yeah, they were, it was Royal Pains, I think is the name of the show that he was in.
But yeah, he's definitely hunky,
very like, oh, that's a daddy, you know?
And he works at the farmer's market.
I know, he's a cutie, he's real cute.
But he's definitely in the running
for the hunk watch for me,
but we'll find out who my hunk was a little later.
Yeah, yeah, okay, okay, great, great.
Two-part hunk watch on this week.
Yeah, it is a two-fer. Furry with ads, okay, great, great. Two part hunk watch on this week's furry with ads.
A lot of hunks in this movie.
A lot of hunks in practical magic.
So yeah, so they get married, they have kids,
but then, and she's, listen, she's got that normal life
she always wanted, she's not teaching the girls magic,
she's not gonna teach the girls magic
because she wants them to have a normal life.
But, oh, you know, okay, so I guess before we talk about
what happened to the husband,
we'll talk about what Nicole Kidman has been up to.
She is dancing around at a pool party
that looks like the pool party from Boogie Nights.
Yes, they're-
It's cool.
Yeah. Yeah.
And they're playing a good needle drop here.
I think it's got to give it up.
But it's clearly one of those situations
where no one knew what song was playing
and there's a lot of different dancing going on.
Yeah.
So she's like dancing with three dudes.
She's dancing with three hot guys.
But the man that she cannot resist is Jimmy Angelov,
a guy from Transylvania who talks like Borat.
And if I, who doesn't end up being a vampire, by the way,
if I was a guy, just a regular guy from Transylvania,
I would be insulted by all these movies, assuming,
because this guy turns out to be evil, of course.
He's the villain of the movie, and of course,
the one Transylvanian actor in the movie.
I don't know if he is Transylvanian.
Oh yeah, I don't know if he's, yeah.
But yeah, he's got a pretty heavy accent
that sounds like a lot of different accents.
Jordan is right, though.
It is offensive to all of Transylvania.
It is.
Well, yeah, to have like, why are they always evil?
Like, there's definitely someone there who's like,
I am a heart surgeon.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, also.
I work with orphans.
Yes.
I do pediatric brain surgery.
I'm a woman in STEM.
You're so brave.
We applaud your bravery.
Musical guest, Transylvanian villain.
Honestly, that impression along with Monster Mash Guy are kind of the same.
Oh yeah, I don't do a lot of voices.
I only do a couple.
Musical guest, and it all turns into musical guest at a certain point.
So she's, it's Nicole Kidman, is hooking up with this guy, Jimmy Angelov, but we can tell
he's trouble.
He wears a lot of rings, he wears a lot of jewelry, he makes a lot of weird comments,
more on him later.
So we go back to Sandra Bullock living her happy normal life
and she hears the clicking of the beetle,
the beetle that is the harbinger of the death of a husband.
He's out doing his farmers market stuff
and she's tearing apart the house trying to find the beetle.
Oh yeah, the baseboards, when she was with that baseboard.
This is a cool scene and you're kind of cutting back to yeah, the baseboards. When she was with that baseboard. This is a cool scene.
And you're kind of like cutting back to him
at the farmer's market, you know, with us, the audience.
We know that like something could happen here
because we know about this like beetle curse.
And so he's like dodging all these,
like there's the Tour de France just comes by.
Their little main town. Yeah, he's got a cart full of produce and he's just walking in the middle of the road.
And this is okay.
So it's pretty suspenseful.
We have Sandra Bullock tearing up the boards looking for the Beatle.
We have him, you know, walking around in the middle of the street.
Pretty suspenseful.
This is the music they play.
Matt, can you play the background music to this scene?
This movie, this movie is so dedicated to chill vibes.
Even at the most suspenseful part,
they just want you to feel like you're at a wine tasting
all the time.
This is what I want playing at my dead husband's funeral.
Sure.
So they're playing this music and then bam,
our dude just gets hit by a fucking truck.
Hey Matt, it's time to play our Hot New Sting.
Person in the road who the driver doesn't see and he accidentally gets hit by a car.
Look both ways, kids. Look both ways.
It's true. This is the third movie of Halloween.
Yeah.
Where we've had to use the sting.
Do we think it's a horror movie,
just trope like in all spooky movies,
or do we think we're gonna see this later on down the line?
I mean, I know it's in Meet Joe Black,
we should do that next.
Oh yeah, sure, yeah, yeah.
If it's free with ads.
I've seen that GIF looped a million times of
Brad Pitt or someone being bounced
between five different cars like a pinball.
I like the part where he says, every teen guan be iry.
Yeah, that is.
I haven't seen that movie.
Oh, it's great.
It's great and it's bad.
Yeah, I think it's just like plot wise,
it's a way to kill a character that you,
it's like, well, it's an accident, you know,
and you don't have to go into like who killed them or why. It's just like, oh, you got hit by a car, you know, and you don't have to go into like who killed them or why,
it's just like, oh, you got hit by a car, you know,
and then you can kind of go on with the movie
just because it's something that happens.
Anyway.
Yeah, illness is slow.
An illness death is usually a slow burn.
We gotta get this plot moving on.
Sure, hit the fucking husband with the truck
so we can get in the mystery cop from Arizona.
Who is my honeyquad?
Aiden Quinn, yeah, we'll get to his
very strange plot line later.
So the girls go to live with the ants
but they are forbidden from practicing magic.
Well the girls, you mean like Sandra Bullock's daughters?
Sandra Bullock's kids, yeah.
So Sandra Bullock has two kids,
one of which is a young Evan Rachel Wood.
They go to live with like the aunts.
So then Nicole Kidman,
kind of hearing about the death of the husband
comes to visit Sandra Bullock.
This movie has a wild tone.
Like people, it's one of those things where it's like,
the husband just died and the scene we see
is Nicole Kidman talking about how much she loves
fucking Johnny Angelov instead of dealing with
the death of the husband.
It's very jarring.
And she says, we stay up all night
worshiping each other like bats.
I know what you mean.
You mean you stay up all night like bats,
but the way you said that makes it sound like
bats stay up worshiping each other.
It's, yeah.
That is weird.
You don't know that they don't.
You know what?
I guess I don't.
I don't know what bats do when they stay up all night.
Maybe they are worshiping each other.
One time I was at camp and we did this thing
where we'd sleep over in this giant like
teepee that they made for us.
I don't, it was like, and a bat got in there
and everyone else was fine with it and I wasn't,
I was very scared of the bat.
They're so gross, they're so fucking gross.
Then my eardrum exploded, I had an ear infection.
And that's my story about bats.
Do you think they're related?
Did it, did it's sonic scream it uses to locate insects?
Bust your eardrum?
Well, now I think that that bat was up all night
worshiping my eardrum.
He was probably up, yes, because as we know
from that sentence, Nicole Kidman says that makes sense.
Bats stay up all night worshiping each other.
Anyway, we go back to the town.
As happens to all the women in this family, the like
townspeople gather in groups to make fun of them.
The townspeople, kids and adults get together to point and yell things at them.
And so the little girls are like dealing with it.
She says to one of the like kids who's making fun of her, I hope you get chicken pox.
This leads to a very funny cut later where the kid does in fact have chicken pox.
So Sandra Bullock gets a call from Nicole Kidman.
Her dude Johnny Angelov has been hitting her.
Sandra Bullock goes to whatever city Nicole Kidman is in
and finds her in a hotel.
She's got a big black eye.
And then she goes to pick her up and drive her home
and Johnny Angelov takes them hostage
and he's heating up his ring to brand her.
It is fucking terrifying.
Yeah, this scene in the car where it's Sandra Bullock
has to drive while he's pretty much tormenting
her sister in the back.
It's crazy.
Yeah.
But they gave him like, Bella Donna, I guess is what she put him to sleep with when she
called Sandra Bullock.
So he like, kind of has a buildup to this stuff, I guess.
It's kind of hard to kill this guy, as we will discover.
Yeah, no kidding.
So kind of what they do about it is they,
he's like taking slugs off this bottle of tequila,
which will come back later,
and they like put this belladonna,
this like sleeping herb in it,
and he like chugs it all,
like finally,
finally like passes out.
They think they kill him.
They decide not to tell anybody about it.
It's kind of unclear why.
It seems like you have this out where they're like,
the town thinks we're witches, we can't,
but they're like, we can't do it, we can't tell anyone.
So they just take her back to the,
to like the aunt's house,
and they wanna do like a spell on him to bring him back.
Yeah.
Because they like don't,
there's like a warning about bringing people back
from the dead, but they're like, we don't care, we just bring them back so nobody nobody thinks you're murderers, but I did think about this a little bit about like, you know, it's clearly self defense but then I'm like, oh, the inconvenience of court in another state. because they're not even from that state where they have to, so they're gonna have to travel back to the place
where they murdered this guy.
It's gonna, yeah, just do a spell and bring him back.
It's more convenient to bring him back from the dead
than it is to have all these court dates.
Yes, it's less inconvenient.
Maybe in 2024, you could probably do it on Zoom,
so it's probably a little more convenient.
Oh, that's true.
But this is mid-90s, so yeah,
you probably are doing a lot of travel.
So yeah, just bring the fucking guy back from the dead.
They do-
Put a whipped cream pentagram on his chest.
They put a whipped cream pentagram in him.
That's kind of cute.
That's kind of fun when the like,
I like the stuff in this movie when it's like the mundane,
like how stuff kind of meets the witch stuff.
That's always really fun.
They do a whipped cream pentagram on him.
And before they, so they're about to put some needles
in his eyes, they're about to put these needles in his eyes
and he wakes up and starts screaming at Nicole Kidman,
I want you to be my wife.
It's so, Borat stole my wife from this guy.
Sasha Baron Cohen, you should be ashamed of yourself.
Yeah.
Johnny Angelov walked so you could run.
I did not know that his name was Angelov.
I thought it was D'Angelo.
Oh, I could also be wrong.
I wrote down Johnny Angelov, but you know.
I mean, that's probably the right one, but I was like D'Angelo is what I thought his be wrong. I wrote down Johnny Angelov. But you know. I mean, that's probably the right one,
but I was like D'Angelo is what I thought his name was.
Like the R&B star D'Angelo.
Yes, I don't know what he did.
D'Angelo would never do anything like this.
He would never.
Those cum gutters would never hurt anyone.
No, of course not.
No, a man with cum gutters like that.
Could never do anything wrong. No. So then, so No, a man with cum gutters like that. Could never, could never do anything wrong.
No.
So then, so yeah, so he like pops up
and starts asking her to be his wife, his wife,
and they hit him with a pan and bury him.
Okay, so then, so they, yeah, so they go from just like,
we can't let anybody, we can't let anybody find out
we killed him, it's like, ah, fuck it,
just bury him in the yard.
Like, it's very much.
And then they bury him in the backyard,
but then all these roses start very rapidly
growing over the grave overnight.
Yeah, he's kind of, he has the spell on him already.
So it's like, you know, so bad shit's gonna happen.
Nicole Kidman then comes to the PTA meeting
with Sandra Bullock and the PTA meeting
cannot believe she's here.
This woman is here and they start whispering
that she has a snake tattoo and one on her boob.
Nicole Kidman is not dressed that scandalously.
It's one of those, like,
and it's like the town is just like
cartoonishly evil and they just hate her, but she's like, woo, and starts doing a
dance in the PTA meeting and then just sits down and attends the PTA meeting.
Yeah. With Sandra Bullock, because also I think we should mention the fabulous
store that Sandra Bullock's character like runs. She's got this like apothecary
thing. It's like a, you know, an ocean side town.
I don't know.
It feels like it could be in upstate something or it could be.
I don't know where the main.
Yeah, kind of Cape Coddy to me, Cape Coddy.
It's pretty.
It is pretty, yeah.
But yeah, the little store is like everything
in the 90s looked like that little store.
I feel like these little boutique stores
all looked completely white, like you're at Pottery Barn.
And then.
It's gotta be Monterey though, right?
I don't know.
Isn't she in Los Angeles with Angelov?
Isn't that where they are going to Hollywood parties?
I thought it was Arizona is what I heard.
Oh, maybe it was.
So our dude comes from Arizona, our dude later, Aiden Quinn, I thought it was Arizona is what I heard. Oh, maybe it was a...
Our dude comes from Arizona, our dude later, Aiden Quinn,
but I think there's some sort of weird thing
where maybe he's there because Sandra Bullock
put a spell on him and they're like,
why'd you come from Arizona anyway?
But you never see them get on a plane.
They're driving everywhere the whole time.
So yeah, it could be Monterey,
it's got a little bit of a Big Little Lies
feeling to it.
Oh, yes.
That's exactly right.
Very true.
Wouldn't that be funny if it was just Big Little Lies
was happening at the same time as this movie?
Ooh, with witch stuff.
Yeah, well there's two witches.
But then Nicole Kidman would have to play
two different people in the-
That's fine.
She could do it, let her do it.
She could do it.
Where's Nicole Kidman's clumps?
Nicole Kidman do a clump where she plays everyone.
Yeah, well it's like, it's the same wig too.
So she could just hop back and forth.
Yeah, there you go.
I love it.
Okay, so then we have, so everything's, yeah.
So I mean, I love all the stuff.
The phone tree.
Then we get the phone tree, which comes back later.
We get the phone tree at the PTA meeting. This will be instrumental in the stuff. The phone tree. Then we get the phone tree, which comes back later. We get the phone tree at the PTA meeting.
This will be instrumental in the climax.
Yeah, it's super cute.
I will say that like,
this movie ping-pongs around so wildly to all this stuff.
And it's like, it was a novel.
So you tell us one of those things
where they're trying to get in all the stuff from the novel.
And they have to start
Yeah, I I kind of like
When I'm like what's happening in this thing?
like that to me is the always the explanation is they're just being so
like slavish to the novel and also they have two stars, you know, so like
You know one of these actors can't be the supporting character, they both need like big plots.
But I am just like, I just want this to be about
Sandra Bullock running this store and finding a new love.
I wanted her to be like running the store
and about her second act in life,
like when it goes to like the murder stuff
and the like ghost stuff.
Yeah.
I'm always like, what's this movie?
Anyway, you know, anything with the store,
anything with her like funny,
like employees at the store is really good.
You hate the magic, you love the practicality.
I'm more of a practical guy, I'm less of a magic guy.
Just give me a movie called Practical.
And it's about invoicing,
it's about invoicing for a lotion store.
That's the movie I wanna watch.
Every fall when the leaves turn.
That's so funny.
That is so you, Jordan.
Yeah.
It's so you.
Give me that movie.
Meanwhile, I wanna follow Nicole Kidman around
while she makes bad mistakes.
Sure, while she creates zombies.
Whoops.
Like, yeah yeah exactly.
That would be my story.
I would definitely be the Nicole Given in this story.
After that we get the midnight margarita scene.
Her like aunts are up doing a,
you know doing a, like you think they're doing a spell
but they're actually doing margaritas
and there's this, you know kind of dance around
music montage to you put the lime in the coconut.
This is very fun.
It's in a lot of like if you go on Instagram,
if this is in your algorithm, you can be a friend of mine
because if that clip of the of the drinking Margarita's thing
that's in my timeline constantly.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
And an iconic scene, to be sure.
So then after this scene, after they all kind of wake up
for Midnight Margaritas, that's when we have
the cop come in.
This is Aiden Quinn.
Is it time for Hunk Watch part two?
Yes.
It's Hunk Watch.
Hunk Watch 2, Secret of the Ooze.
He said.
Is that what you think? That was the second Ninja Turtle movie, Secret of the Ooze. He said. Is that what you think?
That was the second Ninja Turtle movie,
Secret of the Ooze.
Oh, okay.
Did you think he was talking about calm?
Yeah.
Ooze can be calm or.
I don't know,
cause I was like. It can be a mutagen
that changes animals into mutants anyway.
Sure.
He. A lot of good Oozes out there.
Had a lot of crushes.
Like I had a crush on him when he was he did Benny in June too
Time I ever saw him and I was like, oh, he's so dreamy but his chemistry with
Sandra Bullock in this movie is like off the charts. It's really hot. He they
Stand so close to each other all the time. I know And he's a cop investigating a murder. I know.
And he just always nose to nose with her.
His weird behavior is kind of explained,
I guess by the fact that you learn later
that Sandra Bullock maybe lured him there with a spell.
But every scene I'm like, why is he acting like,
he's acting so weird.
He's investigating a murder,
but he just makes pancakes with their kids.
It's insane behavior. It's insane behavior.
It's insane behavior.
And then, yeah, I guess we learn later
that she summoned the perfect man with a spell.
So I'm like, okay.
Well, it was a spell that she did as a little girl
so that she'd never fall in love.
She's like, the most perfect man I'll create.
That's the only man I'll really fall in love with.
But then her aunts had put a spell on her
to fall in love with produce guy.
Yeah, a lot of dueling spells in this.
Yeah, which I thought that love spells
were like things you can't do in magic.
Like in a lot of movies, it's like,
you cannot make someone fall in love with you with a spell.
Yeah.
But they're bringing people back from the dead.
You're not supposed to do that either.
So I guess these are just different kinds of witches.
Sure.
And there's no Satan in their witchcraft.
Yeah, there does not seem to be any Satan.
Well, she says it, she's like,
there is no Satan in the craft.
And I was like, well, then who is it then?
Like, what's in there?
They're really Christian witches, there's only Christ.
It's boring,. Christian witches.
So this cop, he's sniffing around the crime, standing super close to Sandra Bullock.
Okay, he goes into her store.
There's a joke that I need us to talk too much about.
I had to rewind this five times.
Okay, here's what happens.
Can someone explain this joke to me?
An old guy comes into the lotion store.
He says something along the lines of,
this didn't work, I still have irritation on my scalp.
And Sandra Bullock is like,
you're not supposed to put it there.
And he's like, what do you mean?
He's like, she's like, wink, wink,
you're not supposed to put it there.
And he's like, oh, and turns around and leaves.
She says it in a way like it goes on your dick
or it goes up your ass.
That seems to be what she's hinting at.
But what is this?
What did she sell him?
I don't remember that he said
it doesn't go on your scalp.
Yeah, no, that happens.
She says that, like the scalp thing?
I thought, okay, when I watched it
and sometimes my brain will just do things for me
and I don't really make decisions on it.
But I thought he was saying, it doesn't work.
I put it on my scalp, and she goes,
you don't put it on your scalp, you put it,
I think it was supposed to be for erectile dysfunction.
I think it was supposed to be
something that made your dick hurt.
I heard a line, right right, cause that's the, that makes sense.
Yeah.
But the line about my, I still have irritation on my,
anyway.
I didn't know what, I guess I gotta re-listen to that joke,
but that's what I thought.
Here's my guess.
Yeah, Matt, what do you got?
I think it said on the back of the bottle,
put it on your head, and they put a little winky emoji.
But what it was was...
Well, okay, well that's irresponsible labeling.
And also we need to know that as the audience.
It just...
Yeah, anyway, drove me insane.
Is that a great joke?
No, it seems like there's a lot of Sandra Bullock
riffing in this.
It seemed like...
Anyway, and Sandra Bull like, you know,
Sandra Bullock, a star, one of our fucking movie stars,
maybe we don't let everybody riff.
Maybe we don't let everybody riff.
Yeah, that's true, not everyone can do it.
So we get this scene where the cop comes over,
starts making pancakes with the kids,
while also grilling Sandra Bullock about the murder.
They, Nicole Kidman puts a like, poison in the syrup that they're just gonna give him with the kids while also grilling Sandra Bullock about the murder.
Nicole Kidman puts a poison in the syrup that they're just gonna give him
because they're gonna eat pancakes together.
And they're gonna kill the cop?
What the fuck is this?
I guess, yeah, I know.
They're just like, fuck it.
What's the plan, ladies?
In for a penny, in for a pound.
But the kids kind of recognize
that he and Sandra Bullock are like a thing,
so they like throw the syrup in the ocean,
this is kind of cute.
And then a frog barfs up Johnny Angelov's ring.
And then the cop is kind of onto him
because the frog barfed up the ring.
I know.
Yeah, that's kind of a funny, like funny,
cute special effect.
And he acted like it was totally natural though,
like they're like looking at this frog who's being weird.
Yeah.
But the fact that they're all fascinated by this frog,
I would do that too.
If I ever see a lizard or a frog or something,
I get so stoked.
I don't know what that's about.
It's fun, they're fun to see.
I know, Los Angeles has so many lizards.
I love that about this place.
It's nice, it's always nice to see a lizard.
Like when their little tails come off.
I love it.
But yeah, so they're staring at this frog
and he barfs up a ring and he goes,
what are you two playing at?
I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about?
It's like it's a frog.
Yeah, I know and the fact that he's like,
I've solved the murder, a frog barfed up a ring.
Yeah, how are you gonna go tell the,
I love the idea of him going on CSI Arizona
and being like, the frog barfed up a ring.
Well, what does that mean?
That means they murdered him.
That means they're guilty.
To who?
Who does that mean that to?
Yeah, and the fact that he knows
it's Johnny's ring immediately,
that's, it's such a weird leap.
Well, I think he's possibly been someone
who has used that ring to do what he was gonna do.
Oh, that's right.
So I guess, yeah, I guess we do know
that he like brands people with the ring.
So maybe they like know they're already on the lookout.
Okay, that makes sense.
So Sandra Bullock goes to confess,
but they just end up making out.
And then we learn that Nicole Kidman.
It's so hot.
They've got chemistry, they really do.
Nicole Kidman, we go back and she's kind of like
tied up exorcist style.
She's got the demon in her.
Johnny is trying to like get out through her.
Nicole Kidman is so fucking great
at all the possession stuff in this.
Make a Nicole Kidman exorcism movie, she's so good.
I wanna see Nicole Kidman possessed by all kinds of demons
for the duration of the film.
She's like a really remarkable physical actress.
Yeah, she is, she's great.
She's so great.
Yeah, she's definitely one of my top favorite
actresses of all time.
She's, and you can see why she's definitely one of my top favorite actresses of all time.
And you can see why she's such a meme, right?
She's arguably the most gift actor of our generation,
G-I-F-D.
And yeah, because she's so expressive.
Also the hands when she was clapping at the Oscars.
Oh yeah, that too.
They were so weird looking.
I remember that.
Yes, truly one of the greats.
So yeah, so she's got a demon and they've got to get it out
and we'll talk about the thrilling conclusion of
practical magic.
Emily, you wanted to have a word about the house
that this takes place in, the mansion.
It's the most beautiful house.
Like, I've got, I do think we should do
a It's House Watch sometime with certain movies
because like the Home Alone house,
I don't know, everybody's obsessed with that,
but the Practical Magic house was like built from scratch.
They like built that house for the movie
and then tore it down.
Oh wow.
Isn't that sad?
But it's so gorgeous.
It's like my dream house for sure.
I feel like that's, I'm definitely of that 90s
kind of era.
It's got a little green house where they grow
like the witch herbs.
That's very fun.
Nobody's bedroom was really featured though.
It's like their bedroom that we find Nicole Kibben in
is two twin beds in an attic, like a dusty attic,
and you're like what the fuck bedroom situation is this?
That is weird, and I feel like we see the little girls
sleeping in the attic a lot anyway.
Yeah, it's like let's get some proper rooms here.
Sure, yeah. I know, yeah, beautiful like, let's get some proper rooms here. Sure, yeah.
I know, yeah, beautiful antiques everywhere.
Yeah, it is, it is like great.
It's stunning.
But also, on Etsy, there's somebody who 3D prints
replicas of the house.
Oh yeah?
And I think I'm gonna get one.
They're kinda pricey though.
They're like a hundred something bucks,
but I'm like. Okay.
And they're like, you know, like dollhouse size, but I'm like, I want one of those.
Yeah, I would love to go into the world
of practical magic merch.
I wonder, I'm sure there's all kinds of stuff out there.
You can buy a frog that barfs a ring.
Honestly, I want a pet so bad right now.
I would take a frog that barfs rings like any day.
That would be very fun.
Have a little frog in a terrarium.
You could-
Yeah.
Yeah, you could-
That would stink.
You could pull the, oh, do they smell bad?
Yeah, well I mean just water that sits all day
usually ends up stinking, you know?
You got flies in the fridge, I guess.
Oh, they ain't the fridge, they everywhere else.
Tell you that.
No, I'm kidding, just roaches.
Okay, the frog will eat a roach, right?
Yeah, maybe.
I bet they will, I bet they will.
Okay, so.
Do cats eat roaches?
Bug has killed a lot of things in her day.
Bug has killed some roaches.
That's how she got her name.
She loved to kill bugs when she was smaller.
Now she doesn't give a shit, too old, but.
Ha ha ha ha.
And now I need a cat.
Yeah, Bugs killed some lizards, yeah.
She, you know, quite the killer back in her day.
Good for you, Bug.
Yeah, she's a legend.
The Nicole Kidman of cats.
Yes.
Okay, so Nicole Kidman, she's possessed,
we gotta get Johnny out of her.
So Sandra Bullock uses the phone tree,
the phone tree we learned about in the PTA meeting,
to call the women of the neighborhood to come by
and help with this seance.
Now, this is fucking,
this is a fascinating scene that they never show us.
This, okay, the music in this movie, it's great.
It's on theme, Stevie Nicks, Sheryl Crow,
Stevie Nicks featuring Sheryl Crow.
It's all great.
It's so oppressive to like the scenes.
There's so many montages in this.
You have two movie stars, let them act.
You don't need to cover them with music all the time.
And you have this fascinating thing going on,
which is this town that hates witches,
has to band together to fight this guy using witchcraft.
And we just see her calling them on the phone tree
while this song plays, and then they all just show up.
What happened?
What did she say?
And there's a great metaphor here. We all band together.
Like, anyway, there's so many great scenes
this movie doesn't show because it's doing a fucking montage.
Anyway, rant over, but I was like,
they're all here and this is a cool scene.
Anyway, let's just have scenes in your movie.
Have a movie have scenes anyway.
Boy, I think I, I hear people,
I've heard this criticism before about this movie,
but I think it's, I have no issues with this movie at all.
And I understand, and obviously you were in the pocket
for it, and there are many, many wonderful things
about this movie which I will enumerate later
in my final review.
Also, I love montages.
Montages are great, and yeah, they are.
Yeah.
But I think that they should support the thing.
They shouldn't tell the story, you know?
They should make you, and you know,
like all the music is great and there's so much fun.
Midnight Margarita, that's great, but I don't know.
It felt like they were using the music to tell a story
that you can use writing and acting for anyway.
All right, okay.
Rant over, rant over.
We have them kind of joining together to do this exorcism.
There's kind of a funny scene, everybody needs a broom,
a woman brings a dust buster, that's good.
But when they do the broom circle,
dust buster woman isn't there.
That could be, anyway.
She just leaves.
They do this like exorcism using all the brooms.
They pull Johnny out of Nicole Kidman and they sweep him out of the house.
They use the brooms to like sweep his ashes out of the house and they pour this potion
onto his grave so he, you know, can't rise again.
And at the end when everything's wrapping up, our boy Aiden Quinn shows up and says
that he wants to be with Sandra Bullock and she
kind of confesses about the like, she confesses about the like spell.
And in a way it's like, hey, I actually created this spell to find like the perfect man that
doesn't exist.
Two, one blue eye, one green eye, you can flip pancakes.
Which not, not asking for much, in my opinion.
Yeah, I know.
It is two things that are, I guess the I thing is a little bit uncommon, but it doesn't rule
out everyone.
But, no, that's true.
The I thing is uncommon, but just like, he can ride a horse backwards and flip pancakes.
I think we could find that guy.
Yeah, that guy exists.
If she wanted to find no guy ever,
she should have written,
find me a guy who's been to therapy.
Yo!
What?
There we go, man.
Hell yeah.
So he shows up, he's in, he says like,
she kind of confesses about the curse,
and he's like, well, I don't believe in curses.
So everything's all good there.
And then we go to the like town Halloween party and and and the whole witch family
They're dressed as witches. There was a rumor in the town that they can jump off the roof and fly and then
They do it and the town is
Delighted and that is the end of practical magic. So at the end of that movie I
magical magic. So at the end of that movie, I was like,
so the curse is gone because this guy doesn't believe in it?
So you're saying, but her husband probably didn't know
about it if she was trying to be,
so it's like his husband was, her first husband
was asking for it because he believed in it?
I guess, yeah, I know.
Oh, and Matt, we should point out,
has put on bunny deely bobs on his head for some reason,
so that's going on.
Oh, yeah, sorry, I just saw them here,
and I just wanted to get a little bit more sick.
You want to pull focus, I get it.
Just a little bit more sick.
Yeah.
They are my daughter's bunny ears.
I don't just own them for myself, Jordan.
Well hey, Matt, you look sick as in sick as hell, bro.
Hell yeah.
Because those are fucking awesome Dealey Bobbers.
We're gonna rank this movie on a scale of one to 10
super loud commercials, but first we're going to
talk about the best lines in the movie.
I'll go first, my best line is when,
in kind of Nicole Kidman and Johnny's,
like the first part of their torrid affair,
he says something so fucking insanely creepy
that if you didn't think this guy was gonna be the villain,
you're positive now.
Matt, can you play this?
Honey, I just have to go to the bathroom.
Let's go together.
Jimmy come on.
Let's go together. Let's go to the bathroom and I will watch you poop.
I am normal. I just want to see the pee pee come out.
I want to know where the pee pee comes from.
I do not know. I understand there's a poo poo hole and there is the pussy hole, but where is the pee pee?
I must see your shits if you are to become my wife! Emily what do you got as far as best lines go? Fuck.
Emily, what do you got as far as best lines go? All right, so when Aiden Quinn is kind of grilling
Sandra Bullock on where Devangelo Diablo,
I have Dangelo written in the fucking dock.
I don't know.
Dangelo's a better name for this guy.
Dangelo is what we're gonna call him.
He's asking, did you kill him?
But the thing is when she created him,
well not like summoned him in that spell,
there's something about it where she cannot lie to him.
Like there's something she just like can't lie.
So she has to make up things to kinda,
you know, work around the lying.
So she tells the truth, but it's funny.
Did you or your sister kill James Angelou?
Oh, yeah, a couple of times.
I just like that one.
That's fun.
They're technically because she's telling them to because they zombie them and then
they hit him.
So exactly. So I liked I don hit him. So. Yeah, exactly.
So I liked, I don't know, I just thought that was cute.
It is cute.
All right. We're going to rank Practical Magic on a scale of one to ten
super loud commercials when we come back.
Hey guys, Jordan here with a little bonus plug segment before the official plug segment. I got a couple of events coming up.
I would love to see y'all out at those events.
On November 2nd, I am going to be at the Revenge of Comics Creators Block Party. Revenge of is a really cool comic book store slash pinball arcade here in LA and
they have a really really cool free event. It's a huge block party with
comic book signings, panels, podcasts, food, all this great stuff. At 3 p.m. we're
going to be doing a live free mini Jordan Jesse Go podcast.
That's me and Jesse Thorne.
We're going to have special guests Brian Michael Bendis and Elliot Kalin from the Flophouse.
And at 4pm I'm going to be signing books.
So if you want to get some signed comics, please come out to the Revenge of Comics Creators
Block Party on November 2nd.
Seriously, so many cool people at this thing.
Patton Oswalt, Brian Posey, Megan Fitzmartin, Cody Ziegler, Josh Gad. So, so, so many folks. Check out the
full lineup at RevengeOf.com. Come to see our podcast at 3 and come get some
books signed at 4. And on November 9th, I am gonna be at the Berkeley Public
Library Comic Con. So many cool folks at this one too. We got TinFam,
Maggie Takuta Hall, Brianna Lowenson, just all the best comics folks at the Berkeley Public Library
for free at 11 a.m. I'm going to be doing a panel at the second floor mystery room, so please come
on out to that. You can get more info at berkeleypubliclibrary.com. I hope to see y'all at that on November to that. You can get more info at BerkeleyPublicLibrary.com.
Hope to see y'all at that on November 9th. Okay, back to the show. We're back, it's Free With Ads.
We're gonna rank Practical Magic on a scale of 1 to 10 super loud commercials.
Matt, I'll let you go first and Emily, you can bring it home.
Okay.
I give this a 7.
I enjoyed it a lot.
It's one of those movies that I only saw a little bit of
as a kid and I remember being kind of turned off
by the lime and the coconut scene
because I was like, I'm a boy, this is for girls.
And then later in life when I-
A boy would never put a lime in a coconut.
Yeah, no, straight into the mouth, shot a tequila.
No, and then later in life when I like, you know,
started loving women, I decided, I don't know.
You decided to put your lime in a coconut?
I decided to put lime in a coconut,
and I was like, you know, it's a really good movie.
It lost only one point,
And I was like, you know, this is a really good movie. It lost only one point,
because I do not understand the attraction to Aiden Quinn.
He is the weirdest, like, leading man I've ever seen.
He just looks like normal guy, which I'm fine with.
Shout out to Norm Norms, we're out here.
Not being in Hollywood movies,
but I was just very confused
because I was like, he's-
That's so interesting.
I think he's so handsome.
What part?
Okay, I think he's very handsome looking.
The hair is great.
The voice is like very sexy.
All of that's normal.
Everything you said is just normal.
Normal hair, normal voice. No, I think he's very handsome.
I disagree.
I think he's a very good looking guy.
Yeah.
Well, to each their own, but I still give it a strong seven.
Also, I loved Aiden Quinn's Western style blazer that he wears in this movie.
Oh yeah, he looks great.
They really dress him as like Arizona cop.
This man's from Tucson.
It's cool.
This is the hottest guy in Tucson.
So now I'm like on eBay looking for Western style blazer.
I'm like, I'm going to go with the Western style blazer.
I'm going to go with the Western style blazer.
I'm going to go with the Western style blazer.
I'm going to go with the Western style blazer.
I'm going to go with the Western style blazer.
I'm going to go with the Western style blazer.
I'm going to go with the Western style blazer.
I'm going to go with the Western style blazer.
I'm going to go with the Western style blazer. I'm going to go with the Western style blazer. I'm going to go with the Western style blazer. I'm going to go with the Western style blazer.'s from Tucson. This is the hottest guy in Tucson.
Yeah.
So now I'm like on eBay looking for Western style blazer.
Do you find anything good?
Not that will fit me, but I think that there's one back home
that I used to wear that was my dad's and it was like this dark green
corduroy blazer that had that kind of Western
like divot thing in the shoulder and stuff.
I'm gonna see if he's still got it.
Jordan, it's your turn.
Yes, so witches and covens, they're powerful metaphors.
They can be very meaningful.
And we, as a culture, in 2024,
we have so much witch shit all the time.
Like we have so much witch media and we have so many witch memes and like if you draw strength
from the like story of witches and covens, you've got so much stuff that you can ingest.
But it wasn't always like that, you know? Like when this came out, the idea of like
a positive witch story and a positive coven story
are like, they're probably pretty rare.
Like we had the craft, all the willow stuff in Buffy,
like but it's like-
Focus, focus.
Focus, focus.
So yeah, it's kind of like a new idea.
And it's a kind of a new idea of telling a like
witch story where like a witch isn't bad, it equals strength and it's a kind of a new idea of telling a like, witch story where like,
a witch isn't bad, it equals strength,
and it's like, which you know,
people who society kind of denigrates
can all kind of like come together
and make this coven and get power from each other.
It's a very like, beautiful idea,
and I know like, why people are so drawn to it.
I think that this movie itself,
watching it for the first time in 2024 is a little janky.
I think that there's some like,
it feels like kinda cobbled together.
It feels like they tried to add too many plots.
So it's like, the movie itself
kind of like frustrated me in parts,
but like I'm gonna say it's a five, but I get it.
It's a five, but I totally understand
why this movie like was impactful at the time.
And I think they could probably kill the sequel.
Not kill it as in not do it,
but in making a really great movie
because we've kind of identified what people like about this
and two of the greatest stars ever to be in movies
will be in it.
So.
Hell yes.
Yeah, fingers crossed for the sequel.
Emily, what do you got?
I'm giving it an eight.
I love this movie.
I think that the vibes in this movie are just unmatched.
It makes you feel like you're excited for it to be fall.
And I don't know.
I think it's very glamorous, too.
I love the aesthetic of everything, all the costumes,
the hair.
I've been trying to get my hair to look like Nicole Kidman
from this movie for years.
My hair will not grow fast enough because it's so long. They have this gorgeous long hair.
I think the romance is really sexy in it. The chemistry between
Sandra Bullock and Aiden Quinn is hot. I like the adventure element of things. I don't know.
I have a blast with this movie, but I totally get it.
I guess I like when things meander
because I tend to meander.
So I'm giving it an eight.
I'll probably watch it again before Halloween.
Like, I love it.
Oh, well that was our review of Practical Magic.
Before we go, any plugs on anybody?
I'm going to have more witchy
phlegm gem stuff out on my Etsy store.
I make jewelry and stuff, but everything's very practical magic
inspired right now.
So if you want to go check that out, it's just phlegm gems on Etsy.
It's like my last name, how you spell it.
Grab some jewelry, feed it to a frog
Yeah
Hey on Saturday, November 2nd, if you're in the LA area
I am gonna be at Revenge of Comics and Pinball for their block party event
free for everybody 11 to 6 I'll be there signing books and
Jesse Thorne and I are gonna do a little mini micro Jordan Jesse go for people there
so if you want to see me and Jesse Thorne do a do a wee little version of our podcast and
Get a bunch of books signed go to the revenge of
Comics creators block party that is Saturday, November 2nd 11 to 6 free for everybody
I'll be there but also like so many fucking cool comics, people will be there.
Brian Michael Bendis, Josh Gad's going to be there.
Patton Oswalt, Hannah Rose May, all kinds of cool people signing books.
Good times, free podcasts.
I think there will be a food truck.
There's probably going to be a food truck.
All right. That concludes.
Hello, peen.
Tune in next week when our movie will be
the non-horror movie,
How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days,
starring Matthew McConaughey.
This is Matt.
["How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days"]
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