Free With Ads - Sharknado

Episode Date: August 26, 2025

For the final week of Animals Attack August, we all watched a movie so stupid that it spawned a franchise: Sharknado, a film about... well you can probably guess.Tune in next week when our movie will be... Tombstone.-----August 28th, come to the Punch Line Comedy Club in Houston to see Matt and his wife Francesca Fiorentini! https://bit.ly/mattfranhtxWatch Emily Have You Seen This? on Mythical SocietyJordan will be at Cape and Cowl Con at Faction Brewing in Alameda on Aug 24. Find out more here!Jordan has some comic books coming out!Oct 1st, Predator Black White And Blood no 4.Dec 3rd Venom Issue 252

This is free with ads. that asked the question, why pay a cable company 50 bucks a month to watch the Weather Channel when you can go online for free and watch the greatest weather movie ever made? It may not tell you if you need to bring a light jacket, but it does have a guy from 902 and0 chainsawing his way out of a shark stomach, and that's basically the same thing. I'm Jordan Morris. And I'm Emily Fleming. Today's movie is Shark Fokin' NATO, the modern camp classic that joins the Big Lebowski,

Napoleon Dynamite, and Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. as a pivotal movie for men who are fun, but not funny. With us, as always, is the super producer, The He Freak. Matt Lee, hitting this with a tornado of drops. My mom always told me Hollywood would kill me. Yeah. What fun. What fun.

I know. Before we all talk about this movie, which is, as of this recording, and probably till the end of time, streaming free with ads, we're going to talk about something else we saw for free on the end. internet this week. Okay. Thank you. I forgot that there's a drop for this. There's a drop for everything. There's a drop for that. Remember when everyone said there's an app for that? Oh, those were the days. Dude, you got a Dell. I did get a Dell. Where's the beef? Whata? Anyway, it's fun to remember things.

Yeah. Soon we won't be able to. That's true. So, this is cool. This, this, this, this Today's other free stuff comes from a subreddit dedicated to this particular program, R-slash free with ads. Now, this requires a little bit of pipe laying, so I will do that now. Oh, lay some pipe, daddy. Shut the fuck. Not like that. No.

I meant I was going to explain some info. You made it sexual. Oh, may I call you Matthew? Yes, you may call me Matthew. Matthew David Lee. Matthew, if you nasty. How dare you. I'm going to lay some pipe

and then I'm going to describe some things that happened that led up to this post that we're going to play. Matt, I believe a couple weeks ago, you were absent and we talked about the lineup for the gathering of the jugglers. Now you edited the episodes. You probably heard that. And I thought, oh, what an episode for me to be absent because I've been to the gathering of the juggles.

Matt's been to the gathering of the juggalo, the music festival dedicated to the insane clown posse. That's right. Can you briefly, just in a few sentences, tell us what your experience was like? Face paint guys accidentally didn't show up that year, but it didn't matter because everyone still had fun, and I watched a guy cut his own nipple off for fun. Okay. With what? I think on some sort of knife, something sharp.

I had to have a bit of knife, right? It wasn't scissors. Yeah, it could have been scissors. It wasn't scissors. Couldn't be like a little, like, cool, raise a blade. It was something razor sharp It was between a box cutter and a samurai sword Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah somewhere there

But yeah, a lot of fun But if it was teeth So I always like, I have never been But always like looking at the lineup Sure yes And we've discussed the lineup We've discussed the lineup So what we did is I ran down

Some of the highlights of the lineup And we talked about what we would see If we were going this year Some of the highlights included Belushi Speedball Lardi B, Mary Tyler Hors, thick Chris with two C's. Siamese goat god, squid pisser,

freaky da pimp, skeez us, and the dumpster babies. I love it. And I think the thing Emily and I agreed on is that we would not go and miss Lardie B. Hell now. Can you play a little, this is a clown rapper, Lardi B. Can you play some of this man? Absolutely. I mean, imagine, he fucking slaps.

Imagine, imagine snorting some riddling, cutting off your own nipple, and fucking groove into this in a pit of mud. Yeah, and picking up some doodoo dollars. And picking up doodoo dollars. Oh, yeah, yeah. I heard about do do do dollars. I saw that and they were like, I saw multiple TikToks about that. And I was like, I want to do, I'm going to do a stitch with those and be like, I will do it. So do do dollars are when a job.

muggalo wipes their ass with a dollar and then throws it on the ground and then someone says oh a dollar and they pick it up and they realize it. I will pick it up. I'm at that point in my life. Yeah. See, they wipe their own ass with it and they crumple it up. Yeah. And they put it on the ground. Someone picks it up and the joke is they got doo-doo on their hands. That's right. But the person laughing also has doodoo on their hands. Yes. And one less dollar. Yes. And is minus a dollar. They can't use to buy riddling. Listen, the way I will put on some rubber gloves, pick up that doo-doo, and then do-do dollar, and wash it in a sink next to a porta-potty and then spend it. I don't even think I'd wash it. It would go directly into whatever vending machine is around. Oh, yeah. Get yourself some do-do-oritos. All the snacks have do-do-a-loor. I can't wait to see them in the next lineup for the gathering.

Dooduritos! I miss doodurritos. They played at noon, and I couldn't park. Okay, so we were talking about this, how much we wanted to see all of these acts. And a free with ads listener who posts on Reddit under the name, I'm Just a Dumb But, went to the gathering, found Lardie B, and posted this clip. Lardie B here. Hi, Emily. I just want you to know that you have a great backyard.

And if you make it to the gathering, I'm going to give you the best fingering. Sorry. Woo! Nice. Incredible. I know! She's fabulous. This person...

Is backyard juggalo for... But? For butt? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think I was discussing that I get a lot of attention for the rack, but not for the backyard. Yes, yes, yes, yes. I really appreciate you guys.

I think that some people on Reddit were like, you could keep these things to yourself. You don't have to say them out loud, and I'm like, you can sing out loud. You can fuck right on. I know. I'm like, you know, if I, if something makes me uncomfortable, you guys, I'll always let you know. But I think that our fans are, they know, they know how we feel. They should know. They should know. I honestly think we have some of the best fans in the world.

Oh, I know. And truly. I hope, I hope this, I hope this listener bought a t-shirt or something from LardiP. I mean, maybe she knows the show and was saying all this. He was wearing the worst hat. Oh, yeah, he was. In the photo. Hell yeah, he was wearing the show.

The worst bucket hat in the photo, which, thank you so much. Well, thank you to this user. Thank you to Lardie B, wherever you are. Oh, yeah, and he posted stuff from some footage of other, if you want to go to the free with ads Reddit. He posted video of Squid Pisser, too. Okay, R slash free with ads. Yeah, and it was pretty cool.

Also, if you post stuff onto the free with ads, Reddit, we love it so much. We love it. Feel free to post onto the maximum fun Reddit. it too. Guys cross-post these things. Yeah, let everybody know. Put it on the Max Fund, like riddle Max Fun with Juggalo content. We love it. Just spam

them with Juggalo content. Help us. Help us grow our brand. Squid piss all over the place on there. Well, yeah, the gathering of the Juggalo's looks like a lot of fucking fun. Maybe next year, you guys. They do a podcast. They do. Actually, I did

look into this a little bit, and I have some more information. There is a podcast tent i don't know tarp a podcast tarp at the gathering of the juggaloes here are some of the podcast that recorded from the podcast area yeah yeah carnival spirits fago lovers heaven the rebirth of mankini tv replicon radio team muj safe sesh with all all all music humble among thugalo show deck one dealt and strange suspicion now are we bigger than in these shows, probably not. Yeah, probably huge shows.

At the very least, first of all, you got a shout out to ICP for having their own sub-economy in which like, not only do they have a festival in which they can like book themselves, but also other acts that only juggalo's know. And listen to podcasts that only juggalo's know. And they just keep trading the same thousand do-do dollars

back and forth. It's incredible. If you want to send some do-do dollars in the mail. No, I'm kidding. Sorry. Don't mail us shit. Please don't mail a shit. Unless it's to your doctor.

Apparently, they do that. Oh, well, anyway, so, you know, if anybody's out there. They do do that. If, if, if Duncan turd-eater, the guy who books the podcast tarp. No, for real. I'm not kidding. I know we would be a little, like, you know, off-brand. Matt will cut off-off his name.

I'll cut off a nipple. I'll cut off a nipple. I'll cut off a turd. Yeah. Emily will cut a turd. Cut a turd right there. Yeah. We'll cut off someone else's nipple.

And Jordan will cut a rug. And I'll cut a rug. Oh. Are big bad voodoo daddy going to play the gathering this year? I have my hard sold shoes. Vanilla ice was there here I went. Oh. No shit.

That's fucking rad. Yeah, it was pretty cool. We gotta go next year. Free with ads at maximum fun.org if you book the gathering of the juggalo's. Let us know. Okay. Hey, we're going to talk about Shark Nato because it is the final week of Matt, get the drop ready. I'm ready.

Animals attack August. Animal attack August. Yeah. We did a snake movie. We did an alligator movie. We did a wolf movie. Yeah. You know, when we were talking about what to do next, I'm like, guys, we got to do shark. We got to do shark. Emily, without missing a beat, you're like Sharknado.

Of course. This is the one. What is your relationship with this multi-film franchise? Okay. Well, I forget the production company that makes these. It's like. The asylum. Yeah. So asylum, which, okay, so we all come to Hollywood dreaming of like, you know, big time startem and stuff. Sure. Sure do a dream, yes. I have always thought. that I want to do, I've never been in a movie, okay? Which I think is insane.

That's a crime. I know. You should be in this crazy town. Not in like a studio film, but I was in my friend's independent zombie movie. Okay. Whoa. Are you a zombie in it? Well, eventually.

Cool. What's it called? The beginning. Can we watch it? Is it free anywhere? I bet it's somewhere. Oh, fuck yeah. Can we do a live stream while we watch it?

It's not bad. And make Matt cringe the whole time? My friend did cast himself as the lead in the movie. But it's- Your friend John Cresensky? That's right. Your good friend, John, Chris. My great, great friend, John.

But yeah, it was, but no, I've never been in like a movie movie. Not that that wasn't a movie. Devin, Fern, if you're listening, that was a movie. Right, right. I'm saying I've never been in a movie in which a budget that was big enough to afford craft services was offered. Right, right. What about you, Jordan?

I've had a few lines in movies. I am in a very bad Sandra Bullock movie called All About Steve. Oh, I know this. It's a really bad movie. And I have a couple lines, and I still get like a $5 residual check for a bit every couple times in a year.

We got to watch this movie now. Oh, sure, yeah. It won't be fun. It's not that bad. It has like a weird, it's like a comedy that doesn't work. And it has some wacko charm to it. and it's like it's it's a crazy thing for Sandra Bullock to have done she had a minute there let's see I am a bartender in a movie called

you're not you that I've never seen where I believe Hillary Swank gets MS oh no and a real bummer you gave it to her that's true with your bad bartending my bad drinks and I am I get killed in a horror movie an anthology horror movie called the ABC's of death two. Oh, I love it. I think I'm pretty good in it. Oh, my God.

I think I'm pretty good in it. We got to watch that. We got to watch all these. Yeah, the ABCs of Death 2 is really neat. So I've always fantasized about being in an asylum movie. Also, this was like, I think asylum has often been

associated with sci-fi channel. Yeah, so they crank out all these low-budget, usually shark movies, but also they do like the trans-morphers. Yeah. You know, they do like stuff that knocks off other stuff. It's all like, you know, Eric Roberts is in most of them. And yeah, you're right, Emily, these became very popular on the sci-fi network.

Yes. And now they're kind of all over the place, but this is kind of where this aired. Yeah, I guess that to me, I like the idea of a life after crazy stardom for some of these actors because that is not a sustainable career. The idea of being like a teen star doesn't always lead to, you know, winning an awesome. Oscar, but does that mean you shouldn't still work and have a nice career? You need work still and it's like there's these studios

that make schlock. Exactly. But that's a paycheck. Yeah, so I've always... Craft service? Yeah. Hell yeah, and I've always wanted to do these type of movies, but I've never been a big star so it's like I don't get to go the avenue of these, but there are plenty of actors

in Shark Nato that I don't recognize from anywhere. That's most of them. And they did a fantastic job. Yeah, there's There's some people who know that they're in Shark Nato. Yes. Some who don't. Some do not seem to realize they're in Shark Nato. We've talked about this with like Street Fighter where we're like, some people know what movie they're in and some people just kind of don't.

Yeah. And but I just think it's cool that these people are just making something entertaining and crazy and fun. Yeah. And semi-ambitious. And yeah. And there's an element of this movie of like, let's put on a show. Like, you know, we'll get into it. But there's so many, like, stolen shots in this movie and places where they were probably shooting without a permit.

So it does seem like, you know, it's a real, like, and I'm sure it was written and shot over a long weekend. Oh, yeah. But, yeah, let's actually talk about this thing. But, yeah, I've never seen it all the way through. Oh, nice. So I went to a Shark Nato party back in the day. And, like, when it came on sci-fi. So I, like, saw it while people were drinking and stuff.

This is my first time sitting down just watching it, watching. Yeah, for sure. Sure, for sure. And I've never seen any of the sequels. There are five or six of them. Crazy. Hell, yeah. There should be a tremors crossover, I think.

Oh, yeah. Tremors Nato. Yeah. Shark Edition. Sure. Yeah, Trimmers. Shark Nato versus Tremors a cane. Oh, shit.

Killer. That would be good. Anyway, so, Shark Nato starts with a bunch of sharks getting swept up in a tornado. I'm like, all right, the movie started. Sure starts. Yeah, it really does. It's kind of crazy. because I was like, oh, not like a slate, you know, not like a silo person.

Yeah, like the original shot is just sharks getting swept up in a tornado. Yeah, they say have your inciting incident on page three, but this was word one. Yeah. Nice. I love it. It's like the cover of the script was just a drawing of a shark nato. This happens. We'll get someone from 90210, they wrote.

So yeah, the sharks get swept up in a tornado. Someone they did. They did get someone who was on that show. You have, then you have some illegal shark fishers who are about to get their comeuppance. One of these guys is wearing like a 50s biker hat, something Marlon Brando might wear the 50s. I think that's the worst hat. Oh, there it is. The worst hat.

Hell yeah. So he's, you know, selling shark fin soup and then the sharks come and kill them all. Isn't that ironic? Anyway Weird how much that has nothing to do with the rest of the movie It does not come back Which was strange because I actually was kind of interested in like Okay, so we got some people eating shark fin soup

And like illegal fishermen There's like a story there Are the sharks angry? Are they in cahoots? Are they mutants? Is there a reason And you kind of expect that with that opening Turns out that opening is opening to a whole other movie they didn't make and instead it's uh i mean and that's just a great opening scene because so much happens in it at one point the guy he like he negotiates for more money uh and then the guy like

agrees to it because he's got a gun and then he steals the money and he goes now i have the sharks and the money and i was like this is this is incredible because that other guy also has a gun and shoots them immediately. It made no sense and it was beautiful. Yeah, and how are you going to get the sharks back? Anyway, they're on this guy's boat anyway, whatever. I mean, everyone on here dies immediately, so like no use, no reason to try and figure out what was actually going on.

Yeah. 100%. And then we go to the beach. We got rock and music. We got babes. Surfing. And we have surfing and a lot of J.C. Penny's signage. Sure.

I'm like, did J.C. Penny sponsor this movie? And I think they just were shooting on the beach and there were, I can't imagine any of it. There is no way J.C. Penny can sponsor anything. But possibly Shark Nato. Like, if anyone could afford. Bitch, they can't even untangle the wad of necklaces behind their jewelry counter. I don't think they can do that. Or empty, their empty storefronts that are everywhere.

Well, listen. Or get someone to go into a J.C. Penny. Can I tell you in Batesville, I do too. But in Batesville, Arkansas, where I went to college, we had a Kroger and a J.C. Penny and a Walmart. That was about it. But I would try to go into J.C. Penny and be like, I'm not going to just buy my clothes at Walmart. Right.

Yeah, I'm fancy. I'm going to go to J.C. Penny. And then I was like, this is a fucking chaotic nightmare here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all bad. We're also getting the credits. The writer of this name is Thunder Levin? No.

That's, I mean, about as good as the guy who directed Roadhouse. His name is Rowdy Harrington. Yeah. Damn it. If their names were reversed, I would pop a hole in a condom and make sure I could marry them. Sure. So you could be. Emily Rowdy

Rowdy Fleming Routy Fleming You would take his first name As your last name Yes exactly His first name is your first name Emily Thunder Emily Rowdy

We're going Rowdy on this one And we have our lead Ian or Ian Zering If you nasty If you nasty If you nasty Ion if you're nasty He's a surfer dude

With his buddy Baz And still has some hair And he still has some hair He's got his buddy Baz Who always seems drunk and not because it's an acting choice, I think the actor just seems drunk. Also, he is the dad from home alone.

Oh, no, so that is the... Oh, wait, which drunk guy? So he is playing a drunk. That is the dad from home alone. His buddy Baz is the guy on the jet ski. Who gets bit. I think he is not supposed to be a drunk. I think the actor was just drunk on set.

That's my theory. Yeah, because they couldn't figure out if he was Australian or British. He's Tasmanian. Baz is from Tasmania. He mentions it at one point, which I was like, copy.

This is useless. Yes, Bazz cannot nail a joke. I mean, not that anybody here really nails any of the jokes. The Baz really can't. Baz really cannot. Got it, got it. So, something in this beach scene that will recur throughout the movie. So they use a lot of stock footage, right?

They're shooting the actors and then just going to stock footage. The stock footage all is different times of day. So you'll shoot the actors who look like it's noon, and then you will go to a wave crashing that looks like 5 p.m. it makes you feel insane. There is just some, like, bad filmmaking stuff in this where you're like, I feel crazy. Watching the day, changed to night,

changed to afternoon so rapidly in front of my face. Very crazy. So, yeah, a lot of stuff like that happening. If you think that's crazy, wait until you get a load of the shark nato. Sure. Yeah, if you don't like, they're being rain in one shot

and then not rain in the other shot, where you see a tornado made of sharks. Oh, my God. I think about this all the time. Like, if you don't look good wet, you can't be in these movies. I look horrible wet. Same. Could you imagine?

I'm a bad wet man. You know you're beautiful. What? A bad wetman. Do I stutter? That's you directed Roadhouse. Bad wetman. Yeah, I'm bad wetman.

They could not get Rowdy Harrington. They called bad wetman. Of the Connecticut wetmans? Well, we summer in Connecticut. We summer. On the cape. But it's true, like, you know that someone is beautiful when they can look beautiful wet. And so shout out to Tara Reid.

Yeah, yeah. She looks good. She's a good, good wet girl. Yeah. Good wet girl. Bad wet men. There's good wet girls. That's right.

Hey, we got another babe in this movie, not just Tara Reid. It is Nova. She works at a, like, beachside bar. Looks like fun. And that looks like a lot of fun. This bar looks great. owned by the I and Ziering character with a former professional surfer

we didn't mention this his name get this are you ready in the shark movie the guy's name is Finn so really funny that's really funny when that happens yeah learned his name is Finn

Finn like dorsal like dorsal oh very you know what or Huckleberry or sure I got to say it's probably not the pun they're trying to make but yeah I think that is another famous There's a lot of Finns, yeah. Guy from Finland, also a Finn. Ah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Finn, end of movie. Who's your, who's your, yeah, that happens. Which is a joke they do. We'll get, oh, we'll get there. Stop it. So, Nova, she works at the bar and has a scar on her leg that everyone talks about all the time. You know how people always bring up your scars.

Yeah. When they don't, anyway. I got a big scar on my leg and no one gives a shit. You're not. People aren't always asking you about it, and when you don't talk about it, they're not weird and rude to you. Jesus.

It kind of looked like gills, and I was hoping that she had some leg gills. Oh, yeah, that would have been a fun reveal. Might as well. Maybe in Shark Nato 8 or whatever, they'll reveal that they're all mur people. She's got some water world pussy gills, like, right at the five. Oh, baby, do those gills go all the way up?

And Nova's, I think, is good in this. I think she is one of the people who is like, I understand Sharknato. I'm going to do the performance And she's an actor that I don't recognize but I'm sure she's done other things but she's fantastic She is really good

She totally gets this and is a lot of fun So we learn via The News that is always on All the Time Everywhere That's how story go forward Story go forward, watch news Watch news Then you can know what story is

Watch news, do what news says Turn on News see where to go next Oh cool Tara Reid's house The News is saying to go to Terry Thank God for news. I love news. So the news is saying that there's a crazy tornado coming because of global warming.

Shark Nato, weirdly the second movie we've watched this month that has good politics. Good politics. Well, there are some people in the movie who say that it's the government running the weather. Sure, sure, sure. But for the most part, it seems like the news is right. Right, yes. You're right. Could be the guy in the hardware store.

Yeah. So, yeah. So, yeah, that's the closest they, they, and that's all the explanation we get for the Shark Nato. No one ever tries to explain it. Don't need anymore. Let's go, global warming. What are you going to need? It's like needing explanation for the end of Magnolia. Sure. Yeah. The frogs fall from the sky. What do you want?

Yeah. What did, what did Bill Murray say to Scarlett Johansson at the end of Los Angeles translation? You don't need to know. I know what she's, he said, Shark Nato. It's global warming. That's why the Shark Nato happened. Hey, little mama, let me listen. You're in your ear. Oh, is that what he said?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So Finn decides that he's going to go get his wife and kid, his wife and daughter. His ex-wife. Excuse me, his ex-wife and daughter. And, like, everybody in the bar just comes with him. Nova goes. The dad from Home Alone goes, who is like the drunk, who's actually harassing Nova. He is fun.

I know. Yeah. John Hurd is his name. RIP. RIP. in 2017 great actor he was in the

sopranos and he was great in that not as tall as I thought he was good no not the tallest guy

oh that I think yeah for sure all right we're gonna go with him yeah just do the thing okay fine

tall is guy or the shark NATO yeah one of the sharks I'm sure is the NATO is a guy is the NATO

I don't think so if that's what is a woman but a storm yeah what is a man but a Shark Nato.

Thank you, yes. T.S. Eliot said that. I'm glad. Thank you. Snapity, snap. Snap-a-roo. So, okay, so they go over to Tara Reid's house who has a, there's not a lot of art

in the house. There's just a framed headshot of Tara Reed on the wall, because I'm sure just the art director, they told them like, we have the corner of this house where they're shooting porn in the other room, make it look like her house and they just printed out her headshot.

taped it up on the wall. Yeah, yeah. And we need a bunch of trophies. I love she has a trophy case at one point. Oh, I didn't notice that. Yeah. I just noticed her own headshot. Oh, like near her stairs.

House are going to know it's hers. Yeah, there she is. It's her house. So, yeah, so Tara Reid is just like being mean to Ian Zering because of their bad relationship. You can't come in here. Yeah, they just don't want them to come in there. But then a shark burst through the window and Nova kills it with a pool queue. And then, yeah, so the shark-nado is, like, going crazy.

All these sharks are breaking into Tara Reid's house. Wait a minute. I got a question. How well do you think you do? Like, what skills do you bring to the table in a shark-nato? Well, swimming, for sure, right? Oh, yeah. You're a good swimmer.

Yeah, I'm a pretty strong swimmer. So I could, like, swim, maybe swim up to people and help them out of cars. Oh, that'd be nice. Yeah, anyway. Well, I think I've watched a lot of videos where you're supposed to, like, punch them in the nose. Right, yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. Or, like, stick your fingers in the gills. Do you guys have shark survival skills?

Oh, yeah. I've watched the videos. Ooh, put the fingers in the gills, fingering story. Oh, there it is, sure, yeah. What are the gills, what the pussy you breathe from? Fingering's a shark. Good stuff. Oh, Tara Reid also has this, like, jerk boyfriend there.

Yeah, last about maybe 60 seconds. Yeah, this guy gets killed and his legs get ripped off. And, like, the practical gorn in this is really fun. It's fun. It's fun. movie like starts to be fun when this shit happens when people are just like dying in crazy ways also when he dies and his legs get ripped off we see his headshot float by yeah so they also printed out this guy's headshot and framed it to put up in the house to prove it was their house

that's some budget right there do you remember having to get your headshots printed out i know yeah it was not cheap you ever had to refill a color printer jesus christ i never i never printed out a headshot what i took a few but then i would just like put them on facebook and be like oh what do you want for me. I know. You can't believe you're in your zombie movie. I cannot believe they used to make us print those out. Yeah, those are the days. So they all, everybody like piles in the car. They're watching the news on a little portable TV.

I'm like, just turn on the radio. Why does this kid have to have a fucking portable TV? It's for us. Yeah, but any, but, okay, yeah, anyway, you're right. I'm just, I was mad at the portable TV. I understand. If you're mad about the portable TV, you're going to get really mad when you see the shark. No.

Yeah. Anyway, so, you know, they're driving around, just like looking for survivors. There's a little, I forget who's doing this back and forth, but I just wrote down this exchange. Someone's like, just my luck, sharks. Someone says, my luck too. And then someone else says, my luck too. That's the dialogue in this movie. I'm like positive.

It's everyone's luck. Yeah, it's not happening to one person. And everybody was like, oh, Shark Nato, today. And I'm like, well, yeah, anyway. Well, I guess because Nova has some, like, tragic backstory. Right. Which I'm going to be real, boo-hoo, bitch. You're not getting any sympathy from me, bitch.

Yeah, bitch. You got a little scars. Shut up. You got a great server job. Yeah, you got a great job. Yeah, as soon as she was. On the Santa Monica Pier. She was like, I don't want to talk about my scars on my leg.

And I'm like, bitch, we're all cutters in the 90s. Like, what is your deal? And then she's like, a shark did it, and I was like, pussy. Yeah. You weren't even depressed. Yeah. I guess it could have been both. Yeah.

So they come on some, they come upon some kids who are stuck in a bus, and they do a thing where they like, by the way, it's raining in the last shot. And when they find the kids on the bus, it is, it is 100 degrees outside and not raining. Yeah. Also, it's like no water on the ground and then water with a shark swimming around. And, yeah, this feels to me like something they weren't supposed to be shooting. And they're like, okay, go, we have the bridge. Go, go, go, go, go. You know, and so they repel down to get these kids.

And when they put the kids on the rope, the kids magically transform into clearly adult stunt performers. These are, of course, the oldest teens. Oldest teen. Yeah, like Ian Zering will, like, pick up the kid and put the kid out of frame. And then when they're on the rope, they are two feet taller. And different genders. So, yeah, it's really, really crazy. There's a bus driver.

He kind of looks like the comic book guy from The Simpsons. He's the one who you heard in Matt's Drop going. My parents always said Hollywood would kill me. Honestly, is this guy, he looks so familiar, but what a great part. This guy had, is this the writer energy to me? Yeah. I wonder if this is the guy who wrote it or like the director or something. Well, he just reminds me of a lot of character actors who they were like,

We want this type, this type, this type. But I'm glad he died the way he did because if he died trying to come up from the school bus, that would have been a bummer. Yeah. So he makes it up to the top of the bridge and then he's like celebrating. He's like, oh, my parents said Hollywood would kill me

and then a big just piece of debris falls on him. That's pretty fun. He's like in the middle of the frame so you know it's going to happen. But yeah, that's pretty fun. They steal a Humvee and like run away from the cops. There's a nitrous button. just like in the Fast and Furious cars.

Wait, what year did this come out? 2013. 2013, thank you, Matt. Okay, yeah, Hummers were like a big thing right after 9-11. And they're like, cool hummers. So, yeah, this was supposed to be a cool, like, whoa, I can't believe they got a Humvee? There was when I went to college in Arkansas in, like, 2004, and, you know, post-9-11, hummers became a whole thing because we were all going to be in the military.

Anyway, so there was, my sorority sister had the biggest bump it ever. You remember bumpets? No. It's like a thing where, like, you'd have a poof on the top of your head. Oh. There's like an as-seen on TV, like, loop that you bought. Yeah, it's a little comb with a giant foam thing

that you put your, like, hair over it. Yeah, I do remember those. And it'd be a big poof. So it's basically like a beehive just on the top. Right. And then everything else hung up. Like a top bun that, like. It's like a whole titty on the top of your head.

Right. And then nowhere else. This girl, crazy titty on the top of the head, pink humped up. Pink Hummer. Pink Hummer in Dry County, Batesville, Arkansas. Wild, anyway. Love a Hummer.

So they go to the airport where Ian Zering also has a son that he's never mentioned. This really seems like the movie is just being written sequentially. Yeah, 100%. And no one is going back and rewriting it. Just mention the son. No, he just like, I have another son. We need someone else for Inezer, for Nova to have a crush on. Right.

Yeah. He's clearly Tara Reed and Ian Ziering need to end up together. Sure, of course. So it's what we all want, the two 90s icons. Yeah. So, yeah, the sun and, yeah, Nova are just like into each other immediately. His name's Matt. His name.

Hey, there you go. Hey, that's fun. That's my name. The worst Matt. The worst Matt. Great sting. Great sting. Everybody's favorite sting.

So he, again, is just like bullying her about talking about the scars like you would do. He's like, why don't you talk about him? It's like, you've known her for five fucking minutes. I don't like talking about him. And so she tells her story about how she was, like, stranded in a life raft, and sharks ate everybody, including her grandpa. And she's like, six people went into the water, and one little girl came out. It's like the closest to acting we get in the movie.

It's like almost acting. And you got to respect someone, like, giving it their all for Shark Nato. Yeah. You know? Because they're just like, listen, I don't care what I'm in. If it's a Hallmark commercial. Sure. I'm going to act my ass all.

Oh, she sold it. She sold it. But also, grandpa, not dad? Yeah, weird choice. Higher stakes. Higher stakes. Say it was your dad. Maybe we're meeting dad in Shark Nato 5 or something. Maybe they had this plane.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They did not have this plane. No way. No, but I mean, like, kill the dad. Bring the granddad for the next one. Oh, mommy can get wet, if you know what I mean. I think so. Yeah, yeah.

I think I know. Sexual. Oh, so like the, it's okay, so people, people mess up their dialogue in this movie and it's not it's not edited out or they don't redub it there's a part where the bus driver is saying i used to hate heights now i'm away from sharks that happens a couple times where someone says a line wrong but it's in the movie right that's so i the first time i watched this movie was like at a party right we're all socializing we're goofing on the movie and now i'm just watching it alone in my house and it made me feel insane yeah yeah yeah these words don't make

sense what time of day is it yeah this movie is not a sit down to watch it no no no yes um this is a pace back and forth like slap yourself in the face a few times sure yeah crazy thing to just sit and watch alone hold your arms in front of you it's written in a way where like expects people to be talking during it yes which is a weird flex someone will be making margaritas while this is But that's like a crazy flex to be able to still make a movie. Totally. You know? And just be like, yeah, no, but they won't be watching it.

It'll get made. They won't be watching this part. Don't worry. Just say whatever. Yeah. So Ian Zering's son, who we're just learning about, is a chopper pilot. He takes Nova up in the chopper. The plan is to throw homemade bombs into the shark-nado.

Oh, my God. Which is kind of the plot of Twisters. Is it? They're like, we'll stop it with these bombs. Yeah, I mean, but that's also sort of the plot of Twister 1. And is it also Twisters? They have these like these little mines they set. And when the tornado sucks it up,

that kills the tornado. In Twister, it makes sense because they're like, oh, this will suck up these things that are stationary and they'll fly into it. Yeah. And this, he's like, let's take a helicopter into a tornado. I know. Which is like, because you guys, I don't know if you guys seen a helicopter, but wind is a factor.

I think Kobe Bryant would agree. I think so too. I think he would if he could. Killed by the shark tornado. Killed by a shark nato. He flew too close to the shark. My favorite thing was like the conversation between Ter Reid, Ian Zering, and their son when he's like, you can't do it. You can't go up there and do that.

And she's like, what? And he goes, he's going to throw a bomb into the tornado. No. Oh, and then answering goes, wait a minute, hear him out. Hold on. As soon as a woman says, no, he goes, well, now I'm into it. Oh, all right. Tell the man what he can't do.

Yeah, exactly. Out of spite for this school marm over here, I'm going to let him speak a little more on this hairbrained scheme. And being the worst dad in the world, he lets him do it. Let's him do it. And the worst boss in the world because he lets him take Nova. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, he has a daughter. who also hates him because he's like

why do you love Matt so much? You let him fly a helicopter and see shark native. Because the movie clearly loves him so much. We don't even know who the fuck you are, daughter. You've just been an asshole this whole time. Yeah. Go be in the gray. You'll matter more. Be a photo some guy has in his wallet.

Pose for a wallet photo. Nova at some point says we're going to need a bigger chopper. The fucking balls to reference Jaws. I know. I know. The balls to say remind people that Jaws exist. Nope, they'll turn the movie off

Wait, there was a song in this that I was positive you were going to talk about and it was the weather says it's gonna be a storm or something like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. God, I thought you were gonna put it in here. There's like a Tom Petty sounding song. Yes, it's that one.

And it has real the director's friend's band. 100%, yeah. My friend can write it. Honestly, if I ever made a movie, I would definitely be like, hey, dad, is there any... Well, your dad has a Grammy. He has a Grammy. I wrote this thing

I know, but they're not going to give me their best songs. True, true, true, true. It's going to be like, we like whiskey on Tuesdays. I don't hate that. It's pretty good. Tuesday whiskey.

Tuesday whiskey. Get Shaboozy to sing that. You got a hit. Hell yeah. Who's that? Anyway. They're in the, so he and him and Nova

in the chopper, they're both jiggling but different amounts. They can't decide. They have not agreed on how jiggly the chopper is. He is going, whoa, and she's just sitting perfectly still. Yeah, she's totally chill about it. Her seat's better.

So, okay, the Shark Native is about to get blown up. We're going to talk about it after we come back. We're back. It's Free With Ads. We're talking about the exciting conclusion of Shark Nato. Okay, the plan is to throw a bomb into the Shark Nato out of a helicopter. Nova's throwing bombs, but she falls out and gets eaten, eaten by a shark. Swallowed hole. Yes, swallowed hole by a shark.

These sharks, by the way, are just swallowing people whole at this point. Yeah. And honestly, they look at. innocent to me. The sharks just look like they're existing and they just happen to like people fall into their mouth. Well they're just like I'm yeah I know it's not this is not the shark's fault. Honestly

the sharks are in the tornado and they're probably going ah! Yeah. If you get hit with anything out of a tornado you'll die. It doesn't have to be a shark. Right yeah and you see them it's like the way a shark is built like the physiognomy of a shark is not like. What did you say? Well like the physical

The physiogamy. The physiogamy. The physiogamy. I don't. Sure. Like, a shark looks like a stupid fish with big teeth. You're 100% right. So when it, like, lands on a car, it doesn't look like it's like, I'm going to kill you. It looks like it's drowning because it's not in water, the thing it breathes. And so it's weird watching them shoot them in the head with a shotgun because you're like, I don't know, man.

I feel like a shark's mostly dead. Yeah. Yeah. He just says to, like, be out of the water for four more minutes. Right. And no, it was like, boom, boom, boom, boom. By the way, Nova's shotgun has unlimited bullets. It's like a video game shot.

So, yeah, Nova gets eaten, and then Ian Zering jumps into one of the shark's mouths. Oh, he has a chainsaw, and Tara Reid has a weed whacker, and they're, like, chopping him up. This is pretty cool. And he, like, jumps into the shark's mouth, and you think he's eaten. And this is kind of like the scene of him jumping in the mouth. It's kind of like what you see in all the advertising. Right. You think he's dead, but he chainsaw.

his way out of a practical shark prop and is covered in gunk. Okay, I watched this on Plex. Uh-huh. They blurred. Really? Huh. The saw. They blurred him coming out.

Interesting. Because I guess it was too gory. Like, what was it, a hentai pussy? I have no idea. It might have been. I was like, how dare you? I just watched Hentai before this. I wonder if Plex just has like AI that sends him stuff.

100%. Too bloody. Maybe so. But yeah, it was all blurred. The thing coming through the fly. flesh and I'm like, this is maybe the worst EGI and you thought we got to save the kids.

Yeah. Well, yeah. Oh, so the, I mean, maybe this didn't come across because it was blurred, but this is like one of the only practical things in the movie. It's him cutting and he's covered in gunk and then Nova's in there too and he like pulls her out and like this is, to me, this is like fun. This is when the movie hits. It was fun, yeah. It's like, this is cool and funny and like

gross and gory. I'm like liking this. Yeah. Yeah, when the movie is like kind of here at this level, then like, it's doing its job. And, yeah, Nova's in there, too. They ask her what her real name is, and she says, Ginny Lynn. I don't know why this is a reveal.

Like, what? Who cares? Yeah, it's one of the last lines of the movie. Yeah. What the fuck. And then Ian Zering and Tara Reid kiss, even though they've been fight. They don't, anyway. I mean, her boyfriend just got eaten by a shark a few, you know, minutes ago.

And his girlfriend is covered in blood. Yeah. And she wants to fuck his son. Yeah, so I feel like, also that ends well. Yeah. But yeah, I think it's just, you're right. People want to see them, Shakespeare, the Bard. No one did it better.

Shall I compare thee to a summer shark natal? So that's like the end of the movie. I think you're right. I mean, I think people just wanted to see these two 90s icons. Yeah. Well, did you see the clip like that was a semi post-credit scene? Oh, no. Maybe I missed this.

So there's some lady who I don't think is Tara Reid. somebody looks like it could be her. I'm so confusing. And she's like, they're about to go shoot a scene. She goes, you wait, we're all going to be famous. What? And I was like, what? That is strange.

Yeah. Over the credits, there's like this kind of like Ramonesy song about the Shark Nato that's playing. It's like, okay, probably just really has, I mean, again, has. They really thought that they were doing something radical. Yeah. Wait, so the post-credit sequence is just like. a behind-the-scenes outtake of them saying this is going to be a great movie yeah we're all going to be famous jesus and they were this movie is incredible i don't know they made a bunch of these

that's true i know and they knew it and yeah and the people in this movie will be like at comic con tables for the rest of their life selling autographs and like you know pretty hanging out with the tremors folks hanging out with janey kennedy from tremors nine yucking it up uh and as matt alluded to instead of the end they put Feene spelled Finn. Because it's a shark movie. And that's the end of Shark Nato. Yeah.

Genius. Genius. Great stuff. We're going to talk about the ranking we give Sharknato. But first, oh, we gotta do the hunk watch. It's hunk watch. Yeah, John Hurd, right? John Hurd.

He's up there. The dad from home alone. Yes, you knew it. I was going to, yes. He's great in it. And he's sort of my hunk. But if I have to be completely fair, the sharks. I mean, the sharks, all of them together inside the tornado.

There's somewhere there's a NATO with a tear going down. That's a swirly, a little eye. Did you see what Shark Nato wore to the red carpet during the movie Oscars? It had a titty out in honor of Terry Reid. That's right. That's right. Terry Reid also one of the hunks of the movie. Oh, 100%.

I thought she looked great. Total Babe. Love her. And I think it is unfair the way that Hollywood Chews Up and Spits Out Starlets. Thank you. Much like a shark coming from a NATO. Exactly.

I have two titties out for her right now. That's right. Tits out for Tara. Tits out for Tara. Yeah, she doesn't have a ton to do in this. I think in the sequels they give her crazy. Oh, she's in more Shark Nato's. I think they're both in all of them.

I don't know that for sure. I've not seen any of the rest. That's crazy. Is it a tax scan? It might be. I don't think it is. I think it was made to be and then was accidentally successful. Oh, okay.

It's the producers. I think it also, somebody asked a question in the movie and they were like, how do you know that? And she goes, Shark Week. And now it's a staple of Shark Week to watch Shark Nato stuff. Huh. So I think that it's kind of a fun, bad movie tradition to watch this, especially during like Shark Week stuff.

Emily, any more thoughts on the? the hunks of the film? I think that, yeah, he's the hunk. Home alone, dad is 100% the hunk. He also said that he was rich. I like that. I like that. I like when he said he was rich. I do.

Honestly, what I'm looking for is, it's getting sad. A drunk man asleep in the back of a truck who's rich. Yep. Sign me up. Sign me up. Yeah. Hi, daddy. Hi, daddy.

Oh, I'm looking at the Shark Nato, Wiki, apparently Tara Reid, and Ian Zering in all of the films. Amazing. What about Nova? Oh, I don't know if Nova appears, but I'm sure. I'm sure Nova pops up at least one more. It seems like they are building up Nova to be the big hero. But like, I bet Nova's like, fuck you. I've got other shit to do.

I'm sorry, the economics of this is blowing my mind a little bit. Because I truly am wondering, are people watching these? We watched it. Yeah, but like, because for a podcast, how many podcasts? That can't be that many podcasts. Well, I mean, because we're watching it for a podcast,

doesn't that mean that it got watched quite a bit? Sure, but I'm just saying it just seems like, okay, but they made how many? Seven? They made, let's see. They made six. Here's a little, I'm just looking on Wikipedia right now. Here is a little, just blur.

from the final one, the last shark-nado, it's about time. In his quest... Wait, hold on, hold on. It's called, it's about time. I think it's a time-travel story. I know, but that's a great double-unctrine.

That's hilarious. In his quest, Finn fights Nazis, dinosaurs, knights, and even takes a ride on Noah's Ark. Are you fucking kidding me? And Vivica A. Fox is in it? Hell yes. Did Chuck Tingle write this? I mean, hopefully the sharks

pound each other in their asses. Tingle writes it This is incredible Incredible Yeah wild Wild little franchise All right We are going to rank

The original Shark Nato on a scale of 1 to 10 Super Loud commercials And we come back We'll come back We're back. It's Free With Ads. We're going to rank Shark Nato on a scale of one to ten super loud commercials. But first, we want to let you know we've got a new bonus episode coming soon for MaxFund members.

Emily, do you want to say what it is? It's the Power Rangers, baby. It's the OG Mighty Morphan Power Rangers over there on the bonus fee. review free with ads TV and we were watching the pilot of power rangers the original you can listen to that if you go to maximum fun.org slash join we've got a bunch of cool bonus episodes up there including episodes on fraser on pride and prejudice on buffy the vampire slayer streetfighter animated street fighter cartoon peewee we've done all the greats maximum fun dot org slash join okay Shark Nato, one to ten, super loud commercials.

Emily, you want to go first? Okay, I'm going to give it a five. Okay. Wow. Whoa, okay. I don't mean to... Oh, fuck. I take it back.

Oh, no, no. You keep going. I'm not influencing you. I don't want the best Matt to not like me. No, okay, you know that I rate things based on how good they are in the background of a party. Absolutely. This is a killer movie to have on the background. party.

Yes. You don't need to even hear what's going on to get what's going on. It's fun. People go, huh, Shark Nato. Everyone knows what it is. So I give it a five. I mean, it's a bad movie, but I had a better time riding the roller coaster of nothingness in this than Alligator 2.

All right. Matt, what do you think? I was going to give this a two, but now I feel pressure to give it a three. Oh, my God. Okay. I'm going to give it a three. And the reason why I'm rating it so low is not just, listen, it's not just that it's a bad movie. It's that it's an affront to those who work hard all their lives and don't get to make a movie.

You know, I watch this movie with hate in my heart. You know what this feels like? It was like, you know how some movies are a love letter to Hollywood? I felt like this was a hate letter to me. You took it personally. I took it very personally. I said like, oh, look at you. You can just be like, hey, Shark Nato.

And someone's like, okay, make it. Meanwhile, some people, who will remain nameless, have been trying to sell their leftovers meets my name is Earl Pilot for years. and can't get a meeting. Throw a shark NATO in there. So I guess we all have to just write shark movies. So wait, hang on. So my name is Earl and leftovers.

Is he like... Post-apocalyptic, but also... He's pissed off a bunch of people, but his list is full of people that don't exist. And then he has to keep trying to apologize to people that aren't here. He has to apologize to people for things he doesn't even remember he did. Okay, well, that's Memento. No, but it's funny. Okay.

Sounds funny. So if you want to give me a meeting, Shark Nato's guys, just let me know. But I'm giving you a three. Asylum, do you want to get into Prestige TV? Yeah, sitcom version of Prestige. It's like the bear meets fucking, uh, band of, band of brothers. Oh. Bear of brothers.

Bear of brothers. Um, yeah. Emily, I'm, I'm with you. I'm going to give it. I'm going to give this a bad movie five. I think that there are, there's like more fun bad movies out there. You know, your teen witches, you're the rooms, your birdemics. But yeah, I think if you're like having a bad movie night and want to watch Shark Nato, I think you'll have fun.

Do not watch this alone. You will feel crazy. Yes. But yeah, if you're just like, if you're, whatever, if you're 22 and having a bad movie night where everybody drinks and gets stone and watch something, this is a perfectly fun one of those. All right. That is Sharknado. Let's do a little plug-in. Matt, you got anything?

Yes, if you're listening to this, that means you are two days away. Two. Two days away from me and my wife, Francesca, being at the punchline in Houston. August 28th, that's Thursday. Thursday, August 28th, see me and Francesca Fjurrentini live at the punchline in Houston, Texas. Emily, anything.

As always, I'm going to tell you to go to mythical society.com and becoming a second or third degree member to watch my show. Emily, have you seen this? Also, you know, look at phleg gems on Etsy if you feel like it. Check it out. And there's not always stuff in there, but sometimes there is. Sometimes there is. It sells out.

I can't help it. Sure, no, you can't help. It's too popular. I know. It's not your fault. And I am going to remind folks to go to their local comic book store and have the folks at the store update your poll list to include Predator, Black, White, and Blood, number four. That comes out October 22nd and Venom, 252, December 3rd.

These are kooky, crazy, anthology throwdowns. Each of them has a story written by yours truly. They're going to be a blast. Both from Marvel Comics, Predator, Black, White, and Blood, number four, Venom 252. Get them. Okay, tune in next week when our movie will be Tombstone. Maximum Fun. A worker-owned network

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