Free With Ads - The Third Man, with Maggie Tokuda-Hall

Episode Date: July 15, 2026

This week we invited author and all around awesome person Maggie Tokuda-Hall to bask in the glory of July-brary with the film noir classic The Third Man (1949) starring Orson Welles as Man Who Doesn't Show Up In Movie Til Halfway Through. Tune in next when July-brary continues with... Zodiac. ----- FlemGems ETSY Store! Get Maggie Tokuda-Hall's new book Bathtime For Snow Monkeys Also get another one of Maggie's new books What Do People Do At The Science Museum? Get involved with Authors Against Book Bans! Jordan is going to be at San Diego Comic Con July 24th and 25th. On July 19th Jordan will be signing books at Comic Quest in Lake Forrest California between 12-5pm. Jordan and Maggie will be at Cape and Cowl Con, Sunday August 30th at Faction Brewing in Oakland. Help support this show and unlock bonus content! Become a member at https://maximumfun.org/joinfreewithads

This is Free With Ads, the podcast that asked the question, why pay Apple TV 12 bucks a month for a bunch of prestigious spy dramas when you can go online with your library card for free and watch an espionage classic that's sure to pump you up using a constant bed of hard-hitting, pulse-pounding zither music. That's right, the zither, the 40-string devil, the big-ass guitar, you rest on your dick, forged in the fires of the late 18th century,

the hottest, horniest era in the history of the world. open wide for a mega mouthful of Teutonic folk music. I'm Jordan Morris. And I'm Emily Fleming. Today's movie is The Third Man, a classic thriller that will make it hard to stop thinking about that YouTube video where Orson Wells is shooting a wine commercial drunk off his ass and is all like, ah, the French.

With us, as always. Is the super producer the he freak Matt Leave hitting us with those Dutch-angled drops? Ah, the French. There it is. We were all thinking the same thing. I was like, should I reference it in the intro because I think Matt's going to make it the drop. Not only did I make it the drop,

but I made it a few different stings too. Oh, well. French. Beautiful. And then I also have one at the very beginning of that video where they say action Orson and he asks, just do anything? That's my favorite.

So I made, You know? So if for some reason, people here weren't around for internet 1.0, there is a famous video of Orson Wells, one of the stars of this movie, who's in it for one scene. That's right. He is, in his old age, he was just doing any commercial he could because he needed money. And he was an alcoholic. And so he's doing this wine commercial. He's clearly drunk.

You can see all these bad takes he does. and it's one of the funniest. The internet has yet to be funnier, I think. Yes, yeah. It was back when the internet was pure. And only funny good things happened on it. Yeah. And now other things happen.

Now it's bad. I hate it. But hey, we have, speaking of good things, we have a wonderful guest today. Perfect for Jew Library because she is a celebrated author. She's the writer behind the novel, The Mermaid, the Witch and the Sea, the graphic novel squad,

and the picture books, love in the library, and the soon to be released Bath Time for Snow Monkeys Maggie Takeda Hall. Hi, Maggie. Hey! Thank you for having me and thank you for not introducing me as a bad thing. I love that for me. We know how to treat our guests right.

We call them good. We want our audience to know our guests are good. Maggie, hey, before we talk about the movie, let's get to know you a little bit in a segment we call Talk to Guest. Talk to Guest. Maggie, the first thing I read of yours, it's a really, really fantastic graphic novel called Squad, illustrated by Lisa Sterl.

It is, I think the, like, bad but sexy elevator pitch is mean girls but werewolves. Is that accurate, would you say? Yeah, I'm not going to kick that elevator pitch out of bed. That does the trick. Yeah, yeah. It's, you know, more complicated than that and very, it's a wonderful book. But to get them to check it out, that would be the pitch, I think. It's got all these werewolves.

Are werewolves your favorite monster? And if not, who are the monsters ahead of the werewolf? Ooh, that's such a fair question. Thank you. I think they're the monsters that I feel the most kinship with. But I was like a sucker for a sexy vampire as a kid. And now that there's like the Lestat season of interview with a vampire, I have to admit that I'm a dumb bitch for vampires still.

Hell yeah. I just like a dumb, sexy vampire, you know? Who are the top dumb sexy vampires? Well, I mean, I got to hand it to the... And Emily, feel free to weigh in. I know this is something you feel. Oh, yeah, yeah. I let you take it away first, though.

Oh, no. Well, Lestat is definitely like, oh, especially this particular Lestat. This incarnation of Lestat, I feel like, is the highest form of dumb sexy vampire, which... Yes. Who was the first list of that? Tom Cruise. Wow.

Okay. So he plays a stat. He was good, but he ain't no... I love that interview with the vampire movie with Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt. I have not watched the show yet. I've heard the show is awesome. Oh, my God. It's a hoot.

It's great. I haven't watched the new season yet, but I'm going to. I'd say that Alexander Scarsgard is another good, sexy dumb vampire. I love him. He's another good... Especially when he gets his memory erased. and he's like nice briefly. Oh, beautiful.

We love it. This is still interview with a vampire we're talking about? No, this is true blood. Yeah. When he was one of Suki Stackhouse's many paramours, at some point, he's like a really mean intense vampire. And then he gets his memory wiped and he turns into just like this very lovable hymbo. And I loved that period of time for him.

And it was so sad when it was over. I know. I agree completely. It was good. Yeah. Yeah, so maybe if vampire is the top, then where are we going from there? Then werewolves. I'm always going to love werewolves.

And then I love the like creature feature. Like I love like, I don't know if you guys have seen Deep Blue Sea. Uh-huh. Yeah, of course I've seen Deep Blue Sea. But I love that movie like very deeply. And for a long time when I still lived the kind of life where I could drink heavily, I had a drinking game that went along with it that I would play every year on my birthday. And now I think that that game would actually kill me.

Like, I think I would try. And within the first half hour, I would just be dead. So do you drink every time L.L. Cool J talks to his bird? Is that part of it? Yeah. That is one of them. Nice. And then it was whenever...

Listen, big deep lucy fan over here. Yeah, Thomas Jane's forehead is cut unnecessarily out of the camera shot, which happens, like, a lot. Or any time he's rolling on the floor, but no one else is. I love that. Which also happens a lot. Drink every time there's bad cropping in the edit. Yes. And then you pause the movie for the Samuel.

Jackson scene and everyone takes a shot, which is just not, again, not the lifestyle of living anymore, but I love that for me of my 20s. So wait, do you find the shark sexy? Or is this not necessarily a sexy question? That's not always a sexy thing. Not everything has to be horny. Just monsters. Okay, okay, got it.

Listen, I support and have occasionally dabbled in monster fucking. Sure. I was just thinking like holistically monsters. I've never looked at a shark and been like wood. Have you ever seen a shark? Have you ever seen a street churks, huh? But you've seen the street sharks, though? The what?

The street sharks. No, no. Street sharks was a cartoon that was sort of a Ninja Turtle's competition. Oh, you know, it was like the competitor to Ninja Turtles. Yeah, it was Kirkland. Exactly. Yeah, with the Hydrox Ninja, if your parents could not afford Ninja Turtles, you could get a street shark. Yeah.

It's like a star. Yeah. Yeah. There were on the street and they were like fighting crime, but they were also muscles. It's like a minotar, but with a shark down. Yeah, imagine fucking a shark. I'm not going to pretend I'm better than that. No one's better than that. Yeah. Yeah. One of them also wore jeans. That's right. But they were like cutoffs. You know what I mean? They were like, Oh, the sexiest jeans. Yeah, because he was biting on him, I think. He's biting on his jeans.

Well, he's a shark. What are you going to do? You can take the shark out of the water. Yeah. Right about that. Hey, we're here. It's Jew library our month. All the movies we're watching. You can watch for free with your library card. Maggie, one of your kids' picture books is love in the library. Can you tell us about that library from that book and, you know, what your relationship to them is? Yeah. Damn, what a segue.

Boy, are you guys ready to come to a screeching halt? Let's talk about state-sacian racism. Yay! Hell yeah. Don't worry. I'll bring it back to shark fucking. Already another monster fucking question for after that. I hope you have a good sting for this one.

I have my confetti ready and then I put it away. Oh, good. It's a true story about my grandparents met in a Japanese-American incarceration camp during World War II. And I'm very proud of it. It's a very earnest story. I wish it weren't so fucking relevant. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

But my grandmother was the camp librarian. And every day my grandfather would come in and check out like a huge stack of books. He had zero intention of reading so he could flirt with her. And they fell in love and they got married. Yeah. Honestly, kind of got a handed to him. You do. And apparently in her journal, she was like, George reads like mad. And I have his copy of crime and punishment.

And you know that thing when you open a book and you can tell it's the first time it's been open? Because it makes like a. Right. That was more his five. He loved this book. He sure held on to it. Yeah. He just likes looking at it.

You know, the cover. Yeah. I think that's exactly what happened. Thank you for helping me get laid, book. Sorry to say that about your grandparents. No, that's okay. They had five children. I'm aware of what happened.

Right. You were made and everything. I know. Well, yeah, we'll talk more about your upcoming books later. But first, why don't we get into the third man? Yeah, had anybody seen this previous to this watch? A lot of head shaken. Never even heard of it.

Oh, really? Yeah, same, actually. Oh, all right. I've heard of it, but I also was like, am I thinking of the thin man, which I also haven't seen. We maybe also debated watching that too. Yeah, that's right. A little peek behind the scenes. A little behind the curtain.

Well, yeah, let's, oh yeah, I guess in general, Maggie, are you like a let's watch an old movie person or do you avoid that? Yeah, I can get down with it. I am married to a person who thinks that all black and white movies are the same movie. So I don't watch as many of them as I used to. But I'll get down with it. It's usually like someone has to kind of assign me one or like I have to have a reason to watch it, like have found it because I don't tend to discover them very much on my own. Yeah. Every time they turn on like, it's a wonderful life, he's like, oh, not Schindler's list again.

It's an old movie. They're talking like this. Everybody, that same movie. He was literally walking around the kitchen doing that voice the whole time I was watching this movie. To be fair, that is the voice that happens throughout. throughout the movie. It's extremely accurate this time. That's about all I know about this movie,

because I don't, I was so confused the whole time. I can't wait for Jordan to explain to me what happened. Okay. I'm happy to do it. We start as I mentioned in the intro with a bed of zither music. That will continue throughout the movie. Okay. This music is so funny.

It's like the music that's on in my. head while someone's trying to explain board game rules to me. Oh, yeah. So you gather resources. You need wood, ore, and sheep. Well, maybe we just play it and I'll figure it out as we go. Do you have Candyland? What about shoots and ladders?

Pick up sticks. Let's just play pickup sticks. I'm so glad you guys brought up the music because my number one takeaway was I was so distracted by the music. I was like, is this normal? Was this just what music sounded like in the 1940s? And I didn't know till this moment. Yeah, it was so weird.

This was like a pop song. This was like a needle drop. This is like, you know, yeah, this is like the offspring kick it in during the credits of the faculty, basically. Right. Yeah. It's as good. It's a real zany soundtrack for like kind of a serious movie. Yeah, it's like slapsticky.

And that's why I was like, what is. What is happening in this movie? I think by the end, it is, it's like, it is so strange. I think by the end when the movie, when the shit hits the fan, the Zither music makes you feel so stressed out. And I think that's by design. I think it is, it is to show like how crazy things are going. And I, I like love the music in this movie. It is so weird and disson.

Let's hear a little bit of Zithr. You know, don't necessarily want to go and sit through the movie, but are. interested in just hearing what we're talking about. Sure. So magic the gathering, you have to take when the car comes down. You have your mana. You tap the mana. So if I roll a six, I have to go back like five blocks.

No, that's if you roll a six the second time. That's right. Okay. So when I grab a, and yes, you might also be disappointed when you hear the music. SpongeBob does not make an appearance. I know. Oh, yeah. It does sound very sponge, Bobby.

Like, you'll be playing that music, though, and it'll be like a woman being interrogated by the police for having a falsified passport. And you're like, do, do, do, do, do you're like, am I supposed to laugh? Because this is kind of funny. I'm from Czechoslovakia. Oh, I get it. She's from there. Yeah, this is her music. So our story takes place in Allied, excuse me, an ally occupied Vienna.

The country has been divided up by fascists. And when I saw this, I was thinking to myself, sorry, sorry, I was thinking to myself, Is this a dang document? Yes. Is this a dang doc? And later, I watched Errol Morris's The Thin Blue Line, and I thought to myself, Well, that, hold on. Is this a dang documentary?

You know, we're going to have to stop you right there. That is an actual, that's a documentary. Well, it was very interesting, very enlightening. That was very good for that specific bit setup. I do want to point out that it was the allies who split up Austria. Yeah, yeah, sure, sure. But for the sake of the setup of this, a dang documentary joke, it was very good. I know, yeah.

I feel like I am envisioning the comments for this episode, and it will be history guys. Hi, history guys. I see you. I don't want to hear from you. Yes, please comment. Be mad. Everyone would be mad. Anyway, so yes, the country is divided up.

A lone American has found his way in. This is Holly, and he has gotten a proposal for a job from his friend Harry Lyme. He gets there. He gets to where Harry's apartment is supposed to be to find out that Harry is dead. He goes to his funeral there, burying someone there in the grave. a kind of a British detective comes up to him in a trench coat, a leather trench coat that I'll go ahead and call fetishy. Yeah, that's fair.

It looks like you could get a lot of liquid on this thing, and it would kind of slosh off kind of easy, very fetishy. And also, you know, 1949, there are a lot of fedoras in the crowd watching the watching the funeral the fedora of course every time it pops up has to be the worst hat but anyway

so this this leather fella this leather daddy of sorts finds Holly he takes him to a bar we find that Holly Holly like writes paperbacks he writes like westerns

Graham Green the writer of this movie not that Graham Green not the famous that guy from that thing who we all love, but a guy who wrote... I got so excited for like one second. I know, yeah. It was like, how old is that guy?

Oh, no. Different author. And he, so, you know, this character, Holly, like, writes these kind of cheap paperbacks and there are kind of like a punchline in the movie. Graham Green also kind of wrote Thriller. So this is a little bit of a self-own this character. So he writes cheap paperbacks.

And there's a great little... I'll call it a gag. This isn't a hilarious movie, but I think it has a couple of really funny parts in it. There's a part where the kind of British captain has a goon, has a goon that's there, and the goon is a fan of his. So he punches him in the face and he's like,

so what are you working on next? Anyway, and the goon is always kind of like fanning out because he reads this guy's westerns. Yeah, there's another good bit too where Holly keeps calling him Callahan. And he's like, my name is Callahan.

Callahan is an Irish name. So it's like there's a bit of like he just hates the Irish. He's like, how dare you think that I have an Irish last name? Very funny to me. So yeah, so he's already kind of getting swept up in this kind of intrigue.

We learned that Harry Lyme, we're not sure what he did, but the kind of police suspect him to be a racketeer, someone who kind of gets contraband, kind of moves it in and out of the country. Anyway. They say he's involved

in a racket. Yes. That's the way they describe it. Right. No, he's not a tennis player. Right, exactly. And they don't explain what the racket is. And there was part of me that was like, well, you know, you know, who else was, you know, involved in a racket technically. Han Solo.

And he's a hero. So maybe Harry Lyme is a hero, you know. And then you find out what it is. And you're like, oh, no, he's bad. That's less fun. Yeah, it's less fun. Yeah, what Harry Lyme is actually doing is pretty horrific. That's right.

Was it Han shot first. Yeah, that's true. He's not so great himself. That's true. That's true. A flawed hero at best. That's right. Also, he doesn't return and I love you.

What kind of monster. I know. What a dick. Just say I love you too. Just say I love you. But then that would be like on a bunch of shirts. It wouldn't just be Han Solo. I love you too.

That would rule. Also, he was a bad dad. He was kind of a bad dad. What, the character or the guy? The character. Okay, good. That would suck. Yeah, he does get stabbed by his own son.

That's right. That's true. It was hot as fuck, too. I'm kidding. Most importantly. Yes. So kind of along the way, Holly gets this kind of random invitation to, like, speak at this kind of salon thing by a guy who doesn't know his books but just heard he was an author and invited him. That's going to come back.

He also gets a phone call from an Austrian man named Kurt. who kind of knows what happened to Harry Lyme or says he does. So he goes to kind of have this little, you know, this little interview with this, with this Austrian guy, Kurtz. And they go out to where Harry Lyme was supposedly hit by a car. When we see Kurtz, he has no puppy. In the next scene, he's holding the world's cutest puppy. That's right.

And no one talks about it. No one mentions this man who has no puppy, who then in the next scene has the cutest puppy in the world. And it's teeny tiny. It could have just been in his pocket. It could have been sleeping in a little teacup. Yes. I wonder if he was given that puppy by Orson Wells, who was directing the film and was just like, I don't know, it's just cute. And people might get bored and they might want to look at a dog.

You know, it kind of a bit with a dog. That's right. everyone likes a bit with the dog that's correct yeah orson wells did not direct this movie he didn't no he's in a bunch of movies that he didn't direct this is carol re-directed this movie okay so yeah I don't know if this is in Orson

Wells as I need money phase but he would just appear in a bunch of stuff well he probably just wanted someone to hold his puppy he was like hold this yeah yeah it does kind of sort of come back he sees the other guy who's kind of part of the conspiracy he sees that puppy in his house so it's a little bit like maybe

these guys are in cahoots But it's just a fun puppy to see And actually the dog from this movie is still alive He's a classics professor At the University of Missoula He's mostly retired But he teaches one or two classes a year Because the students keep him young

I hate myself so much right now For a moment I was like how No We all a little bit when Jordan does this bit We all a little bit hold out hope Yeah, I know. We should create a sting for this somehow.

Like, all dogs die. Yeah. No, it should be no dogs die. Yeah. I think this thing needs to be for anyone who's the guest on the show who asks the same question, which is really every time. It's incredible. And also, there's a cat in this movie. I was very excited when that happens.

Little kitty. I did think we need a sting for the worst cat. Oh, shit. I think that cat kind of sucks. It looked dirty. It looked like a dirty. To be fair, Vienna had been bombed a lot. Oh, boo-hoo.

Clean yourself. You're a cat. That's the best cat they could get. Lick your wounds and the dust from your fur. My problem with that cat was it ended up being a snitch. That's right. Yeah. Snitches on hair.

All cops are bastards, including that fucking cat. Oh, yeah, all cats are bastards. A fascist B-line. A cat. All cats are beautiful. Excuse me. I think the B stands for beautiful. Yeah.

Anyway Anyway, so what happened In this movie? Oh, okay, we learned that Harry Lyme was seeing someone. He was seeing a woman. So Holly decides he's going to go to see Who's an actor? He's going to go see the play that she was in.

And she's in this play. Everybody is like speaking Russian and he just doesn't understand. Or speaking German and he doesn't understand it. So he's just like looking around while everybody laughs. It's kind of a funny little moment. This Holly guy has no person.

personality at all. He's like, it's just, he reminds me of when I dated Southern men from a small town. And they, it's like, what are you thinking? And they just be like, no, I don't know. Like, that's that guy. If you just kind of went, what do you think of this? He'd be like, I don't know. And then like, walk away. I'm like this. What is this guy like? I don't understand. He like, and he just like, he just goes backstage. No security at this theater. He just goes backstage. He finds her. And then she's like, meet me afterwards. So he goes to meet her in the dressing room. And I'm sorry, I'm going to get up on my soapbox here. Back in the old days, hot women had a little mole. And I, I'm sorry. Maybe this isn't PC of me. Hot women should have a little mole. Yeah.

I'm so fucking sick and tired of no moles on women. I've got one, but it's not where you think it'd be. Have it moved to your face. And I had to have it burned off. off. I like texted Jordan to tell him because he, I was like, I'm getting my first you know, like, they're going to burn off this mole. I'm freaking out. Have you ever had

done? And he's like, yeah, it hurts real bad. I'm like, fuck. And then it did. It hurt really bad. Thanks for allaying my fears. It's over very quickly though. I need to get some moles removed. Yeah. It's going to hurt real bad, Matt. Fuck. Yeah, never mind. Kill me. All dogs die and moles getting burned off. It hurts real bad.

It hurts real bad. Sorry to give these tough truths. Yeah. Tough truths. So yeah, so she's going to help him kind of like look for Harry Lyme. They were in love. Yeah, as we mentioned, she's from Czechoslovakia. So she has this fake passport that Harry got her.

And there's one of those scenes where all the cops are in her house looking through her stuff and like checking her papers. My fucking God, I get stressed out every time there's a checking your papers scene in a movie. It's this. And when someone buys a plane ticket at the airport, I can't stand either scene. Yeah. So there's a window washer. in Harry's building who they think has seen something or he shouts out to Holly.

He's the porter, I think. Oh, the porter, excuse me. Yeah. What's a porter? I think it's like a guy who helps people take their bags up and to and, you know, like around the building. Oh. I thought it was a guy who owned a port.

And he like helped boats go in. I mean, that would make a lot more fucking sense. And to be fair, I'm guessing. Yeah. I mean, yeah. But you know, but you know, watching a window. All I know is he was washing a window.

I don't know if it was his job to wash a window. I guess she can't wash a window without a job. I'm going to trust Maggie because she knows about books and stuff. That's true. Yeah, I do read books. It's true. Yeah. What is a Porter but the friends we made along the way? You know what?

Wonderful point. Yeah, a lot of my friends went to Porter at Santa Cruz, but I was, I was at Merrill. That's a, that's a, that's a, that's a, dorms in UC Santa Cruz. And I was, I was a, I was a, you were at Porter College. I was an R. I was an R. I was an R. Look at that.

Emily and Maggie, are you guys having fun listening to us talking about? I'm hearing that music again. Play that music. Or college is more of the art college. So the dining hall was best at Merrill. If you wanted a good dining hall, you went to Merrill and you caught the bust. So, okay. So he goes back to see the porter guy whose job may or may not be watching.

washing windows. And there's just a bunch of people standing around like, oh, he was murdered. He was murdered. And there's this little kid and this little kid is, this little kid is dressed so glamorously. This little kid has a jacket. I'm sorry, just the most vacantly faced child I've ever seen in my life. They were like, the direction was like, look dead behind the eyes. And he was like, say less. He was like, I nailed it. I want a child to look as close to a shiny marble as possible. Like this kid is like a perfect circle. It's crazy. I could not get over his outfit, which is like this coat with like leopard fringe.

And like I am like this, they dress this child like your aunt who has no kids. He's so glamorous. And I think it should be mentioned that there is a lot of non-English speaking in this movie. With no subtitles. No subtitles. You kind of just have to go along with it and go, I guess. I don't know. I think you're supposed to kind of be in his shoes for that because he's in this world where, you know, there's five different languages being spoken. He doesn't speak any of it. Someone is always yelling at him. And so I think you are supposed to be like weird and disoriented by it anyway. Which is funny. All the languages to be disoriented by German is the most upsetting.

Yeah, it is. Yeah, because they could be saying anything. You know, no, they got to, those Germans have a word for everything. Yeah, they do. And Scheiden Freud is my favorite. That's a good, oh yeah, that is a good one. That's such a good German word. Yep. German word. I mean, shameful joy when you take joy in the failure of others. So they, so he, this like crowd looks at him and they think he did it.

And so he starts running around and someone, okay, and this is, this is, I think a great. But they think he did it because the child started accusing him. Yeah. I think one of the like co-conspirator guys in the crowd said that he did it. But he gets thrown in the back of this car and then driven, like the guy starts driving like crazy. He says, are you going to kill me? But this guy was just taking him to the lecture he agreed to do. And this lecture is just like written by an author who is like, I am fucking sick of these book Q&As.

I was going to say that was the most realistic Q&A I've ever seen in my fucking life on TV. No shit. Yes, Maggie. Any thoughts on the book Q&A section? Just the whole time I was watching it, I was like, this is a documentary. Now this is a documentary. Yeah, incredible, incredible work.

None of the questions have anything to do with each other. None of them have read the books. I love this for them. Yeah, this is great. There's a moment where they cut away from it, and they cut back to him, and he's just exhausted, and he's like, yes, that's what I meant to say. Just as like, I'm so fucking sick of you.

It's like if you do one of these things, someone will just raise their hand and go like, what are your thoughts on climate change? I don't know. It's bad. Yeah. I read about werewolves. It's about werewolves.

I've been to a lot of, you know, you go to your friend's short film or like a movie that your friend was a part of and you go there to watch the movie and be supportive, but it's usually like, you know. It's usually bad.

And a lot of times I'm in the project and I'm bad in it. So it's like, I get it. But like, oh, I ruined it. I ruined it. the thing. But then it's like, let's do a Q&A. I'm like, please, I don't. I want to go get a big whiskey and forget about all this. Can we please just move on? But you got to be a good friend.

You got to sit there. You got to. Yeah. At the book event, we learn that there may have been at the scene of the auto accident that supposedly killed Harry Lyme, there may have been a third man. And they say the name of the movie. That's the name of the movie. That's the name of the movie. There might have been a deep impact. Wrong movie. No, fuck.

Well, I mean, just like last week's episode, I need a man with true grit. That's right. True. We haven't had a lot of movies where they say the name of the movie. Yeah, the titular part of it. Yeah. It's always a treat when that happened. I love it.

So the crowd kind of finds him again. He starts running around and he like hides in this in this hotel. and he gets found out when a parrot bites him. There's like a parrot who bites him and he yells. Fun fact that parrot is still alive. He owns an antique mall in Bangor, Maine, and they specialize in pre-World War II pharmacy advertisements. You know, potentially the parrot could still be alive,

because they live for like 100 years. Oh, yeah. Really? Yeah. They do. When you buy a parrot, you're like buying a fucking commitment. That's crazy. Well, we got to find that parrot will carry you.

The parrot will array. for your funeral. I'm going to go kill that fucking parrot right now. I'm going to eat your eyes. That'd be so crazy. I thought him to say that. Trust me. It'll be funny in about 20 years.

Wait, wait. I'm confused about something in this movie. There is mention of the black market and like antibiotics that are like watered down and people getting. And I'm like, what does that have to do with what's going on? I'm very confused about that. So post-World War II, there would have been like just like a lot of shortages of normal things that people are accustomed to having access to. Right.

But what did that have to do with these guys? So that was, I mean, I don't want to get us ahead of it, but that's like, that's like his whole, the reason that, oh my God, I just forgot his name. Harry turns, no, the reason Holly turns on Harry is because he finds out that his racket isn't just like selling cigarettes or something normal. It's watering down penicillin that is used to save people's lives. From meningitis or something. And so, like, people are dying of bacterial menagitis.

Oh, God. Which is, like, kind of an awful way to go. What a piece of shit. Yeah, and, like, particularly harms children. And so that's why he's, like, okay. And so his, like, whole character arc as a guy who doesn't like the police but wants to do good in the world works with the police is because it turns out that his friends, like an actual piece of shit. Right. Yeah.

Thank you for explaining that. But I was like, what other kind of stuff? I want to know, I've always wondered how do you get into the black, like, market? How do you buy stuff from it? You just go to it. Where is it? Post on LinkedIn. It's just downtown.

You just start walking around and going to be. What do you guys think of the black market? It's never been hotter. I did try to sell old contact lenses on eBay and I got in trouble. Oh, why? But the prescription was like old. I had gotten a stronger prescription since then. I was like, I got all these contacts.

Who got you in trouble? Prescription stuff on eBay. eBay. eBay got it. It's against the terms of service. Yeah, it's like, because it's kind of like a prescription type thing. So I was like, I want to sell these. There's too many rules.

Somebody let me know how to get to the black market. I got a lot of acuvie. Yeah, exactly. Negative six. We're going to drive down to the local black market. I'm going to sell some steroid cream and buy granite. They're monthlies. They're monthlies. They last for a whole month.

She's got a towel on the sidewalk with just all the context cases lined up on it. Can I buy some contacts in a 3D print? gun that's how they got Luigi that's how they got Luigi yeah he was trying to buy fake contacts I heard yeah I've been like bootleg DVDs of the minions movies just someone taping him with a camboard my my sister had a friend who went to China and brought back all those like bootleg DVDs in high school

and they, you know, when they print the covers, they try and make them look like real movie covers, but just, you know, if you don't speak the language, you're just putting random words on it. Yeah. And so she had a DVD of Blade 2. Hell yeah. And, you know, whoever was making these fake things

knew that there needed to be a quote from a critic on it. So the quote from the critic was Snipes seems pleased. I want someone to blurb my book that way. Takuda Hall seems pleased Real happy with her stuff God I hope that your sister has a picture of that somewhere Because we got to got to see it I know yeah

Maybe she still has them stuck somewhere That'd be kind of cool To watch an old You know camp quarter Blade 2 So anyway So yeah actually this is a great time This is kind of where that comes up in the movie

They explain to They explain to Holly that kind of this is what Harry has been doing They get a little evidence montage of just them showing him like fingerprints And he's like well, yeah, it's probably true My friend's actually a piece of shit He thinks this all over in what I I think is their strip club There's a woman in pasties

Just twirling I wrote down boobs I wrote down boobs That's her Moleskin notebook Showing your notes like a reporter I wrote boobies And that's all

Hair and cat movie's hair cat the worst cat that's good cat like I think those are good this are good stings this woman who I think he's just wearing pasties and like a skirt is just there's no pole she's just twirling and twirling and twirling and and this is the only non-zither music in the movie it's just that classic and the only time zither would have been appropriate right right but it's just like smackadie smackadie do it's like that was the genuine

pony of its day smackety do turn on that Al Jolson he's singing smackety do I'm so horny That's my neck by back That's their version Yes that is there

My neck my back My neck my back My pussy and my crack My pussy and my crack My crack I know Wow Wow

Wow and that's the Chattanooga crack Yeah I guess that was just Sounds like an STD Sounds like something you could buy in the black market Yeah A little Chattanooga crack Down at the black market

Okay so yeah He decides he's gonna do it He's gonna like flip on Harry So he goes to like Anna's house Brings her these giant flowers He kind of flirts with her So he's like falling in love with her too as he's doing this.

With like no, like she's beautiful. Don't get me wrong. Absolutely would. That mole. Well, if she had the mole, then she'd be a real showstopper. But she's gorgeous.

But they haven't really gotten to know each other fucking at all. Yeah. Like even a little bit. Like they haven't had like a single substantial conversation except for that she's like, I loved your friend. And he's like, mm-hmm. He seems completely disinterested in her too. I'm like, how do you know if he likes you?

He's just around. He's not really looking at her. Trying to solve a murder brings people together. It's true. You're right. When you're trying to solve a murder, you get horny for that person. But I wrote down hair because her hair was just like, it didn't, it was perfect. It like was bouncy, shiny, but it never got straightened or frizzy or anything.

And I was like, I when I get to like my grandmother's age or whatever, I'm going to wear rollers at night. I will achieve that hairdo. I'm going to do it. I think the real trick is you just don't shower for like a week straight. And then I should have figured that out, like, because my hair should look like that today. That's a good point. So she never show. Uh-uh, I'm not doing that.

So he, in her apartment, she has a little kitty who I think is beautiful. It's an adorable cat. Fun fact that cat is still alive today. Unbelievable. He lives on a houseboat with his common law wife and they record acoustic music under the name herbal whisper. No. I can't believe you're still doing it. Not herbal whisker?

No, that'd have been better. No, I didn't want it to be too caty. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, I got it. But good punch up. Yeah, thank you. So the cat goes out, the cat gets out, which always stresses me out too. I'm like, let that fucking put the cat in.

Yeah. The papers and the cat getting out. Those are the things that led to a lot of tension for you. Yeah. So the cat goes out to rub up on the leg of someone. one standing out in the shadows. Yeah. Harry Lyme, that guy we thought was dead is alive.

He is played by Orson Wells, who is like on all of the... There he is. There's our guy. He's celebrated for its excellence. It ends there. I wonder if the champagne that he's like advertising still exists. Palmasan, I think so. I want to try it.

I want to get this level of white girl wasted that he's at. Moira Rose commercial based on the Orson Welles commercial? 100% Oh my God. I'd never heard of the Orson Welles commercial before today. I'm so excited that you got to hear it. There's also a great audio kind of compilation of the guy who I guess he's Colonel Sanders, the Colonel Sanders struggling at a KFC commercial over the radio and gets really frustrated

and it's really funny. And you've got to listen to that one too. Everyone listen to it. I'll also recommend Liono. from the Thundercat saying fuck during a voiceover recording session. Hell yeah. Anyway. Oh, no. Paul Mason is not being produced anymore.

Oh, it's a bummer. Oh, bummer. Oh, the French. It's the frog. I blame the French. It's probably their fault. It's the French's fault. Listen, we're almost to the end of this movie. Why don't we take a little break? We'll come back for some more.

We're back. It's free with ads. We're here with Maggie Chukuda Hall. We are talking about the third man. So, Holly, he has decided to flip on Harry Lyme. So he tells him that he's going to, like, join up with him, but he's really, like, undercover for the cops. He says he'll meet him at, like, a Ferris wheel. Oh, it was an orderly from the hospital that they killed and buried in his place. So that's how they thought it was a funeral for him.

They go up in this Ferris wheel. And I, and this is, like, the only scene. scene in the movie. He's on all the posters. Like he's, he's one of those just one scene characters. But like this fucking scene is so good because you know at this point

that Orson Wells doesn't believe in shit. He's just like, he's just this out for himself. The world is chaos. I should make as much money as I can while I can. And you're just like he's gonna push him out of this thing at any second. But he doesn't.

It's just kind of them talking about their philosophy. And he like, learn he doesn't care about Anna, who we know is just like in love with him. And he doesn't care about her. He's just kind of using her to. And he just talks about how like good conflict is for art. It's kind of maybe a cliche at this point, but he's like, you know, the Renaissance had Michelangelo and the Swiss had all this piece and what did they come up with, the cuckoo clock. Right line. Fucking great. Yeah. Just such great old movie writing here in this. He's also looking down at the people below and saying,

there, you know, what do you care of one of those little dots stops moving? Yeah, yeah, I know. He's like, would you stop one of those dots moving for 20,000 pounds? My favorite line was the guy who does the little, the book Q&A, he wants him to do it, wants Holly to do it. And he goes, my friend died and he goes, ooh, that's awkward. Oh, yeah. And I was like, I love that.

Even the character responds to it. He's like, is that what you say when people pass away? That's awkward? Yeah, I was like, I'm going to use that. Every time someone tells you something sad. That's awkward. That's awkward. And in the Ferris wheel, he also kind of threatens to kill Holly.

Yeah. He's like, huh, what if I killed you? And they're like, they already know that you switched the bodies. He's like, just kidding, I'd never kill you. That doesn't feel real. Feels like he would. And like Orson Wells is so fucking good because you can see how he's charmed all these people, but you also see that he's a psycho.

and he also, you know, and I think that's something we miss dearly in last week's cruel intentions is, is Ryan Philippi could not, could not play likable and also a psychopath. But like, this is that. This is that thing. Like he's so charming, but also so in. Yeah, but just Orson Wells have Ryan Philippi of 1999's butt, probably not. Or lips. You know, I don't think we talked about it. Philippi's got some hams in that.

I'm just saying he's dragging. wagon and I'm not mad about it. No. Maybe we should have a sting called like stiff hot guy or something where it's just like, because I'd say the lead like Holly in this movie is just a kind of stiff hot guy too. The performance for me ain't doing it. I don't know. Yeah.

But I mean, how's how's his ass though? How's the hams? How's the hams on Joseph Cotton? You got that dump truck. I don't think we ever saw the bottom half of his body. I feel like we only saw the top. Yeah. He could fully have been in his underpants the whole time and we wouldn't have known.

Yeah. Actually, men did not have asses until 1961. Oh, fun fact. Fun fact. Yeah. I'm glad the animals live long enough to see men's asses. Yeah, they did. They do.

Like, they always, um, imagine the day when those were discovered, you know? Yeah. Yeah. First men's ass. First man's ass. I think it was actually Gene Kelly. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Kelly had the first ass on a man. Yeah. Yeah. That's how we could cut a rug like he did. you gotta have an ass to cut a rug. There's a really, again, the comedy in this movie, occasional,

there's a great gag where the cops are staking them out and an old man is trying to sell them balloons and they buy a balloon to get them to go away. Anyway, just like doesn't interred to the plot at all. It's just this kind of weird little gag of this old man selling balloons doesn't know they're staking someone out. So there's a big old... He's like two grown men.

That's my demographic. Right. These guys want a balloon. He's selling balloons in the dead of night, by the way. Right. This man's not somebody who had like strong business practices. Yeah.

The tank would say no. Maybe they do a lot of stings there. Maybe his, all his clients are cops doing a sting. You know, there is the thing, you know, if you see someone shooting a movie, you go out with a leaf blower and then they pay you to go away. Maybe this guy is like, hey, if I see someone doing a sting operation. Yes, I think you're right. Does that count for TV?

Because they shoot in a lot of. Lincoln Lawyer in my neighborhood. That's still on. I'm trying to get that. Yeah, still on. First of all, ain't that a movie? What do you mean you make a whole show out of Lincoln lawyer? I didn't know it was a show. Yeah, crazy. Second of all, still on? How many seasons a Lincoln

lawyer could they're possibly be? I guarantee you all of our parents watch it. They probably love the Lincoln lawyer. It's like that and whatever Yellowstone there was. Yes. We love that shit. They love it. Emily also loves Yellowstone. Well, I mean, I think the Dutton's is what we're all watching at this point.

See, I don't even know. Dutton Ranch, Dutton Ranch, but, you know. Yeah, yeah, she's on to the spinoffs. I believe you. Oh, I'm onto multiple spinoffs. I don't know if that's an insult. No, it's not an insult.

You probably would like the Lincoln lawyer is all I'm saying. Check out Lincoln lawyer. And also, I'm going to get a leaf blower. Okay, yeah. Yeah, why not? Yeah, make us all some cash. Get the production manager to pay out, man. It's just Lincoln lawyer gets canceled because I keep showing up.

We had to pay Matt, Leave $40,000. Half of Lincoln lawyer budget is going to Matt Lee. I'd love it if you could just go out there and go, ah! Instead of you have to do that. He just keeps screaming, give me money. They probably would pay you if you just screamed, give me money. And then we read Variety, Matt Lieb, new lead of Lincoln lawyer?

He's electric. He's electric. He just keeps screaming. Give me money every episode. So we're, we do. There's a big chase inside the inside the sewer. It looks really, really cool.

It's kind of like, you know, a bunch of big shadows. Looks like a Tim Burton movie. The voices are kind of all around. You know, Harry Lyme's paranoid. Everybody's out to get him.

He initially, so Holly, Joseph Cotton, shoots him. He dies. You see his little fingers going up through the, through the sewer great.

Yeah, what was with that? He dies. They have another funeral where it's all like the same shots. And then you get a shot of, it's the same shot of the first time they see Anna. You see her like walking away from the funeral. But he's in love with her. So he

gets out of the car and he waits for her. And it's this big kind of tree-line street and he's waiting for her. It's this fucking long shot of her walking. And she just goes right past him. Yeah. Fucking end of the movie. I love that ending. Me too. I just that whole, yeah. You know, we're about to talk about in general what we thought about the movie. But first, let's do the hunk watch. It's hunk watch. Maggie, for you, in every episode, we pick a hunk of the film, someone we thought was really fine, or, you know, just somebody we thought did a great job. Major Callaway, the British guy who we see in the fetish jacket at the beginning, hot, great accent.

loved every scene this guy was in, fucking knocked it out of the park. Great minor character. Anybody else? Any thoughts on the hunks? I actually liked his sergeant. Who gets shot in the sewers, unfortunately. But I like a big dumb lunk who takes orders and also likes reading Pulp Fiction. Like, that's great.

He seems like a dream. He's a reader. Yeah, he's a reader. Wood. I like the, her name's Anna. That's what the name of the only woman in the movie is. she's beautiful. There's this old lady

that's like walking around trying to talk to people and nobody listens. And then there's a nagging wife. Yeah, exactly. There's a nagging wife. Yes, and a stripper. Oh yeah, there's also a stripper with no lines.

Give it up for women in movies. But yeah, I think... This is Alison Beckdell's favorite movie. That's right. Well, I like, I know that the old lady who's trying to get someone to talk to her is who I play. But, you know, that's who I'm doing.

We have a sting. There you go. I'd be that old lady. I will literally do any, like, unattractive, like, part. Like, just give me a job. Like, what the fuck? Anyway.

She has her own wig. I have so many wigs. They're just sitting around. Yeah. And only two of them are from Party City. So they only look like shit. Just two of them. But I like Anna.

her handsome dress suits very tailored she looks great that's my hunk is those suits I think she's a very handsome woman if that looks like that she is a handsome woman yes

Matt any thoughts on the hunts I am giving it to our poster boy our main man Orson Wells that's right you know there's just something about seeing his

incredibly handsome face in this and hearing his wonderful pinky in the brain like voice and just being like you know I'd love to see him in more things

whatever it happened to him and then realizing it's a very old movie he's still alive like him and the dog and the cat they all live together that'd be funny if there's a pinky in the brain what are we going to do tonight brain cell tainted penicillin

you're pinky in the brain yeah the pink in the brain got dark in the remake yeah When they do one of those gritty reboots for the grownups who used to watch it, that'll be a plot. One more gritty being in the brain. One where he builds a dirty bomb.

We never really explored how brain would be a war criminal. So it's fun that we get that now. Yeah, I think so too. What makes him tick? All right, that's our thoughts on the hunks of the film. We will tell you what we thought of it overall when we come back. Hey, listener. here with a couple of additional bonus plugs.

On July 19th, I'm going to be signing books at Comic Quest in Lake Forest, California. Now, this was my childhood comic bookstore, so it's very cool to be doing an actual signing there. Come on out between noon and five, get some signed books. It'd be great to see you. I will also be at San Diego Comic-Con on July 24th and 25th, doing a variety of panels and signings. Check out my Instagram or my blue. sky for all the times and places or just search my name on the official comic con schedule. I'm going to have some MaxFun buttons and stickers that I'll hand out to you if you're a listener

of the pod. So come get those while supplies last. Okay, back to the show. Hey, we're back. It's free with ads. We're here with Maggie Takuda Hall. We are talking about the third man. We're going to tell you what we thought about it. But first, we want to remind you to go to maximum fun.org slash join. That's how you sign up to hear our bonus episodes. We like shows. We like shows. It's where we watch some of our favorite TV pilots.

We go around the horn. We each pick a show this month. I picked Spider-Noar, the Nicholas Cage Spider-Man, weirdo mashup spectacular. We tell you what we thought about it to hear our review. Go to maximum fun.org slash join.

Emily's pick is next. So if you want to hear what Emily's pick is for the next episode, you've got to join up. Maximumfun.org slash join. And yeah, get yourself some merch, maxfunstore.com. Okay. Maggie, you're our guest.

We love that you're here. We are now going to rank the movie on a scale of one to ten super loud commercials. Now, a little less applicable with our theme month. You don't have commercials on the library apps. but that's the premise of the show. Don't yell at us in the comments. Can you rank this movie on a scale of one to ten super loud commercials? I would give it like an eight out of ten.

I really enjoyed it. I thought thematically it was like really great and made sense as sort of a post-war film of as we're adjusting to this new world where everything we thought about it is not true and things are bad and people are bad and Americans are also bad. and the stories that we tell about ourselves are not true

and really only make sense in stupid fiction that only the dumbest people you've ever met in your life and joy. I thought it was great. I was just really bewildered by the Zither music. It was really good Zither music, though. It was so much zither. Just a lot of zither. I went to look up...

I'm sorry. I went to look up like what the reaction to the movie was at the time, and everyone was like, oh, it like catapulted, that composer into like a new level of fame. And I was like, that's a wild reaction. Because my whole experience of this movie was like, God, I love this writing. What the fuck is going on with the music? That Zither musician had his wedding at Madison Square Garden.

Yeah. He was so famous. And I'm happy for him and Travis. Me, I am happy for him and Travis. Yeah, the Zither player and the high school football coach, that old American yarn. Emily, you want to go next? What do you think of the movie? I struggled with paying attention to this movie.

And I, you know, if it's not like super, I guess high production value, something sparkly to look at, that kind of thing for me. I have a hard time with getting into it. But I do think it was, I don't like it. I'm going to give it a five. Okay. That's fair. I can tell it's a good movie. It's just not good to me.

Yeah. Yeah. Sorry. Yeah. I found it just to be like a bunch of dudes mumbling. Like I couldn't. I was like, what is we say? It's a lot of mumbling.

And then a totally different language. And I'm like, I give up. I don't know what's going on. There's other languages now? I don't, come on. Nobody's speaking American in this movie. Thank you.

Matt, what do you think? I am in between those two. I'm going to give it a six. I also found it. I was a little surprised that I was having trouble following it, given that it was given that I like old movies, but I realized that the one genre of old movie I don't like as much is noir.

It's just, they just something about it kind of, they do feel like they're all the same movie over and over again. Like he's not wrong when he says all black and white movies are the same. But once I was able to find my bearings the couple of times that I got lost, I did get invested in the story. and I really liked it. I thought it was a lot of fun.

Surprisingly, I don't know. I'm surprisingly good. Yeah. So yes, I acknowledge creaky old movie. I love this movie. This is a nine for me. I think like all this stuff. Maggie mentioned totally true.

I like the kind of weird morality of it. Because, yeah, it's by a British director. And it's a war movie where the American aren't all good. Like there's an evil American. Everybody's, you know, and I think that's, I don't know,

it's a cool way to go about this kind of movie that's, yeah, less kind of heroes and villains. I like this at their music. I, you know, I'm reserving my tens for movies that, you know,

hit me a little harder in the lizard brain. Basically what I'm saying is this movie would be a 10 if they went to a rock and roll high school. I think the big problem I had with the movie is no one went to a rock and roll high school. No one was

killed by the predator. Yeah. If either of those things happen, maybe this is a 10, but I'm going to go ahead with a 9. I know it is like... And there was so many opportunities for both of those things that they just missed, you know? Thank you. Yeah, come on. Call me if you're going to do a reboot.

But yeah, as far as like weird, dark old movies go, I love this one. I've watched it a bunch of times. And yeah, really fun to revisit it again. And that fucking ending, my God. I love it. I love that ending. Me too. So, Maggie, thank you so much for joining us.

There's a bunch of stuff we want to talk to you about here in the plug section. First of all, tell us about bath time for snow monkeys. Please. I have another picture book coming out with Yazim Mora. She was the illustrator on Love in the Library. It is about the monkeys in Japan that sit in the hot springs. And I don't know if you've ever seen YouTube videos of it, but it's like truly some of the most soothing footage to witness.

They're living the life that I want for myself. It's all written in haiku. In about a month before that, I have a book illustrated by Chin Lang coming out called What Do People Do at the Science Museum? That is about all the different STEM jobs that make a science museum, science and natural history museum run. And it was really fun to write.

And I'm excited that it's finally coming out because I wrote it almost 10 years ago. Cool. Wow. Yeah. It's the longest a book has ever taken from the time I sold it till the time it came out. Congratulations. Thanks.

And you do a lot of great work with an organization called Authors Against Book Bands. It makes sure kiddos can get the books that they need and want at their local library and other places. Yeah, tell us a little bit about how you got involved. And if folks want to check it out, maybe where they can go. Yeah. So I'm one of the founding members of this organization. And proudly Jordan is one of our members. and it's over 5,000 book creators across the country united on the single principle that the government should not be allowed to tell us what we can read at public schools or in libraries.

And now that we're in the stage of things where about 70% of book bans come from the government, not from concerned parents or from members of the community, it really is sort of a battle for free speech and if we're allowed to have books at all. And if this is something that you care about, you can visit Authors Against BookBans.com. We do have a donate page, which is very helpful to us. We just made our very first full-time hire, which is thrilling. We now have a project manager. Up until that point, we had been completely volunteer, run, and organized. So all people with, by definition, the primary career of writing books had worked really hard to make this organization work. and we've been able to stop really bad legislation in some places.

We've been able to get really good legislation passed in other places. And if you are not the donating type, I'm not mad at you. A thing that you could do is call your reps and ask them to vote no on HR 7661, on 2616 and on 8705. All three of them are transphobic fucking nightmares that will ban all trans and non-binary books from every public school in the United States. And they are all uniquely shitty in their own ways. But the top level line is that they are the first national book banning bills

and they're trying to do three of them at once. Yeah, authors against book bans, a really great organization full of really cool, nice people, a lot of great book creators in there. And, you know, when I was researching the organization and deciding whether or not I wanted to get involved, the fact that jumped out to me is, They're trying to get rid of everyone poops. Yes. That was in your neck of the woods.

Those mother. That was in Huntington Beach. Yeah. I don't. My fucking, my mom lives there and they're trying to get rid of everyone poop. That's the library. My nephew's go to. Jordan, they weren't trying to.

They did get rid of it. Wow. That wasn't an attempt at a book ban. That was successful book bans. So if you want a laundry list of just the dumbest things books have gotten banned for, you can hit me up anytime. One of my favorites is kitty corn got banned in Texas because the unicorn's butt is in an illustration. And also because the unicorn is a boy and he has eyelashes and having eyelashes is gay.

All horses have eyelashes. All mammals. All of us. Mammals have them. Gender isn't real and also we all have eyelashes. Gender isn't real. We all have eyelashes. This is the craziest thing I've ever heard.

they were like, nah, this unicorn's eyebrows, their eyelashes are too fabulous. They were like, fellas, is this unicorn got eyelashes? Is that gay? There's a fact that I want to fuck this unicorn make me gay? Because I'm about to ban this book. Like, listen, if everyone poops is your pornography, that's fine. That's not for me to stop you. But I just don't feel like that needs to be the community's problem.

You know what I mean? Like, that's like in the privacy of your own home, you can be like, oh, it's crazy that kids can just read this thing that makes me. uncontrollably hot. It's so crazy. It's so weird and gross. Anyway, fuck book banning. Yeah.

And hey, if you want to check out some good books, I think you can see both Maggie and I coming up at Cape and CowellCon. That is a wonderful comic book convention in Alameda, California. It is Sunday, August 30th at Faction Brewing. It is fucking free. come check out Maggie's books. They are seriously awesome. I'll particularly stump for squad.

I'm such a sicko for that book. It's awesome. Thank you. I was literally, by the way, hand-selling your books to one of my friends today because Bubble and Youth Group are both such bangers. Thank you. I appreciate.

Maggie blurbed youth group, which I really appreciate. I thank the good Lord Jesus Christ, which I've never done before or since blurbing that book. Two-time National Best Cellar. I don't know. We had good blurbs. We had good blurbs.

Emily, Matt, anything going on? As always, go to my Flemgim's Etsy store because I will be updating new items a lot more often these days. Hey, check it out. Matt, anything? Follow me on Instagram. New stand-up dates coming soon.

My wife and I are going to be going to be going to a bunch of different places. We're going to go to Minneapolis. We're going to go to Portland, Seattle. We're going to go to Philadelphia, New York. So please follow me. Matt leave jokes on Instagram. Okay. Maggie, thank you for joining us.

Tune in next week when Jew Library continues with Zodiac. Maximum Fun. A worker-owned network. Of artists-owned shows. Supported. Directly. By you.