Friday Night Comedy from BBC Radio 4 - The Naked Week: Ep3. Trump, Traitors, and RIP Tim Davie

Episode Date: November 21, 2025

This week, The Naked Week fundraises for the BBC, welcomes a traitor, and necromances a potato.From host Andrew Hunter Murray and The Skewer's Jon Holmes, Radio 4’s newest Friday night comedy The Naked Week returns with a blend of the silly and serious. From satirical stunts to studio set pieces via guest correspondents and investigative journalism, it's a bold, audacious take not only on the week’s news, but also the way it’s packaged and presented.Host: Andrew Hunter Murray Guests: Paul Gorton, Milo Edwards, and The BNC Players James Akka, Holly Skinner and Amy SmallInvestigations Team: Cat Neilan, Cormac Kehoe, Freya ShawWritten by: Jon Holmes Katie Sayer Gareth Ceredig Jason Hazeley James KettleAdditional Material: Sophie Dickson Ali Panting Darren Phillips Cooper Mawhinny Sweryt David RiffkinLive Sound: Jerry Peal Post Production: Tony Churnside Clip Assistant: David Riffkin Production Assistant: Molly PunshonAssistant Producer: Katie Sayer Producer and Director: Jon HolmesExecutive Producer: Phil Abrams.An unusual production for BBC Radio 4.

Hello, I'm Andrew Hunter-Murray, welcome to The Naked Week. Imagine panorama, if, you know what, under no circumstances, imagine us as panorama. And I want to make very clear to Donald Trump, we do not have $1 billion. Coming up on The Naked Week, in a week where BBC News has come under intense scrutiny, the today program's Emma Barnett goes out of her way to be transparent. You won't believe what I just did in the toilet. Come on, Emma, it's only three hours. Go in a bottle like Humphrey's used to.

And, as with every scandal, it becomes myden, the BBC's own reporting on itself, as usual, kept making things worse. Those accusations arose from a report by a former independent BBC advisor, Michael Prescott. In fact, one could say... Your letter is only the star of it. One letter.

I said one could say, but we absolutely would not. Well, what a week it's been here at the biased broadcasting corporation? When the institution as a whole came under fire for having a blatant liberal left-wing agenda and was accused by White House press secretary Caroline Levitt of being... A leftist propaganda machine. A leftist propaganda machine. Run, of course, by former conservative candidate for Hammersmith and Fullham. Tim Davy, and BBC board member Robbie Gibb, ex-conservative party spin doctor,

former editorial advisor to G.B. News, and answer to the question, yes, but what would a necromanced potato look like? So what's happened? Well, the main problem was panorama, taking a different part of Trump's notorious sore loser January 6th speech and editing it onto an earlier part of the same speech in a way that could be seen to misrepresent a speech that everyone knows led to what the edit suggested Trump was calling for it to lead to.

Clear? And so the BBC did what it does best. Endlessly, mindlessly, self-flagulate like a monk in a Dan Brown novel with BBC chairman with BBC chairman Samir Shah apologising for the footage, saying... The apologising is for the way

the team edited President Trump's speech on January the 6th. And quite right too, because it made it look like Donald Trump's speech to the capital rioters had something to do with the capital riots. It just goes to show how easily we can all be led astray by biased news reporting, as well as by our own memories, eyes and ears and facts. In truth, Trump was as appalled by the riots as the rest of us,

which is why he refused to condemn them on the day and later pardoned most of the people involved, just to show how angry with them he was. Trump said BBC editing created a wholly inaction. accurate impression of what happened, saying that if you view all the footage from January 6th, you can clearly see him winning celebrity traitors. To be fair to him, though, it was a mistake. The panorama clip was cut badly, just like all the police officers during the riot that nobody incited.

For his part in Edgate, BBC Director-General Tim Davy said this. I think we've got a fight for our journalism. Yeah, which he did by resigning. Now, we know he's had a busy week, but on Tuesday, the naked week. did email Tim Davy directly, inviting him to come on the program. Genuinely did that, and it's fair to say we did not expect to reply, and yet reply he did. He politely declined our invitation, but did write. I have the email here. I will be listening. Hope all is well, and thank you, Tim.

Really nice of him to get back to us. It's just amazing how the time to go through your inbox opens up. Honestly, of all the sentences you never thought you'd hear, the President of the United States is threatening to sue the BBC is right up there with these new Epstein emails don't implicate Trump at all. Here is the President talking about it on Fox News. They actually changed my January 6th speech, which was a beautiful speech, which was a very calming speech,

and they made it sound radical. Hmm, a beautiful speech, a very calming speech. And the problem was just three words, fight like hell, being edited into a different part of the same speech. and adding those words fight like hell to speeches where they don't belong can change the whole context of what's being said. Now, obviously, given this week's news,

it would be a very foolhardy BBC comedy show which re-edited Trump's speeches. So let's have a crack. Let's have some examples. So, for instance, here is Donald Trump. In 2023, he said this. about a protester at a rally in Las Vegas? Like to punch him in the face.

Perfectly peaceful words. But edit in those fateful words out of context. Like to punch him in the face. We fight like hell. He sounds like a thawful of a sudden. And then there was the time in Iowa in 2016 when he urged the crowd. So if you see somebody getting ready to throw a tomato,

knock the crap out of him, would you? Seriously. It's about as far from a direct call to violence as you could possibly get. But edit it misleadingly. Knock the crap out of him. We fight like hell. It completely changes the meaning.

And look, he's clearly a nice guy because he added that if someone did knock the crap out of someone on his behalf... I promise you, I will pay for the legal fees, I promise. Which is surely music to the BBC's ears this week. Now, as you know, we at the Naked Week like to help. And as the world's most powerful man has been threatening a billion dollar lawsuit,

the big question is, where is the BBC going to find the money to fight it or pay him off. At time of recording, Thursday night, it's still not settled, but, as luck would have it, at time of first broadcast, Friday night, the nation will be settling down

to watch the annual, much-loved, cycloptic bear charitython that is children in need. For so long, children in need has been a BBC institution. It just takes one glance at that grubby old bear somehow still moping about the place

to say, hang on, isn't Hugh Edwards banned from this building? So to help the BBC raise money for Donald Trump rather than disadvantaged kids Welcome to the Naked Weeks Corporation in Need It's Corporation in Need

It's Corporation in Need Music, fireworks Newsreaders performing songs from cats We've got it all Apart from the newsreaders performing songs from cats Because that wouldn't be impartial Unless they also perform songs from dogs

So To be honest Because we don't even think children are really that in need at all this year. Rachel Reeves has hinted she'll lift the two-child benefit cap and kids these days have Roblox and six-seven to enjoy. What of the BBC have? Pedophiles, the trans debate, and to deal with BBC board member

and haunted potato, Robbie Gibb. Who sounds more in need to you? It's time to go around the country to find out what community groups are doing for corporation in need. I'm joined now by the naked weeks going around the country to find out what community

groups are doing correspondent, Milo Edwards. Milo, where are you pretending to be for the purposes of this tortured premise? Andy, I'm here at a number of community centres around the regions to find out just how people here are raising money to help the BBC. So if you're a WI group with a cake sale, a community

choir with a sponsored swim, or a mudlarker with a tragic backstory, we want to hear from you. And we're aiming to raise $1 billion. And more. This corporation doesn't just need money. Right now, the BBC is in need of pretty much everything from a new series of top gear to a spine.

Okay, well... We don't have very long to fundraise. Well, let's concentrate on the big asks. A new Director-General. Okay, do we really need one of those? I mean, couldn't we just let the thing run itself? Belgium had no government for about three years. That's Belgium, Andy.

All you really need to keep that show on the road is to carry on dishing out the mule free and hope no one asks why Tintin spend so much time in the company of sailors. It's a fair point. Next, we need a solution. to declining viewer engagement in the age of streaming. We need bold, aggressive, creative ideas

that are going to make serious waves in the attention economy. Hmm. Call the Midwife Christmas special? Yeah, might as well. Great. So, time to find out what's going on in your area. Let's cross to Scotland now

where we have our reporter, Milo Edwards. Hello, Andy, yes. People up here are really getting into the corporation in need spirit. I've just been talking to Edie McCready from Balamori who's been... Who's been spending... spending 24 hours sitting in a bath full of...

Can you guess, Andy? Bake beans? No, that would have been a good idea. No, it's actually a bath full of printed out allegations of BBC bias against Israel. Great stuff. Let's see what's happening in Wales. Out there we have, just let me check.

Oh, yes, it's our reporter Milo Edwards. It's all happening here in Wales, Andy. A local choir is singing Manic Street Preacher's songs in a hot air balloon to remind us of the hot air that isn't being trapped beneath the Earth-Sionosphere because we check with critics of the BBC and climate change isn't a thing. Very relieving news.

How about Northern Ireland? In Belfast, we've got Rita Chakrabart. No, we haven't. We've got our reporter Milo Edwards. Hi, Andy. I'm here with a great spectacle. 2,000 local majorettes twirling their batons and marching up and down on a potato. They've dressed up like Robbie Gibb. So good they could join us on the last ever edition of The Naked Week. And in Birmingham, our reporter Milo Edwards is standing by. It's a fantastic atmosphere here in the Midlands, Andy. First time for everything. And what a night to help the BBC. There's a group of model train enthusiasts here

who've spent all day pushing the captured ideology of the trans debate inside Broadcasting House up a hill with their nose. Brilliant. It's so wonderful how corporation in need is bringing everyone together. I think it's time to have a look at our totalizer. All your donations have been flooding in for the last two minutes. We've been doing this bit. Let's see how close we are to reaching that billion-dollar target.

The official corporation in need total currently stands at... £1.33. Okay. But there's plenty of the night still to go, and it's all down to you, the Great British Public. So we'd like to welcome to the stage some actual members of the Great British Public. It's an Amtram group. Please welcome the BNC Oxford Players.

Hi, everybody. Guys, tell me what you're doing for Corporation in Need. Well, ordinarily, Andy, what would happen on Children in Need is that you'd have some BBC Newsreaders singing a song from a musical. So for corporation in need, we, as the sometime cast of a musical are going to, together, read out a completely unbiased BBC News report. Fantastic. Okay. Can I just check? How much have you been sponsored?

1 pound 33. Who have you been sponsored by? The Naked Week. Yeah, I know a Barkin when I see one. And look, we've even managed to find a BBC News report for you to read the only truly unbiased one we could find. It's a traffic update from this morning on BBC Radio Cumbria. Take it away, guys.

Two, three, four. Traffic remains safe. slow on the left-hand lane. Or right-hand lane, careful now. Or the A7 approaching Carlisle. Motorists are advised to head east. Or west, north or south. On to the A689 to avoid delays.

Or arriving too early. On the A66 near Penriff, things are now moving normally in both directions. Lovely, nice and even-handed. Following an earlier incident wherein Lorry shed its load causing tail-backs. Guys, just because a Lorry shed its load, there's no reason to believe the tailbacks were connected in any way.

Do not fall for the misleading editing. Whatever you're off doing, Cumbria, we hope you have a great day. Oh, and before we forget, Donald Trump is an arson. Okay, thanks, everyone. Time once again to lie back and relax in the healing waters of quiet current affairs contemplation. Come bathe in the soothing stream of the news in haikus. caught peeing up garden wall, yet another leak. The news? In Haikus.

This week, the number 10 special advisors put West Streeting into an impossible position, forcing him to say how well Kirstama is doing. But on Sky News, the health secretary managed to laugh it off with an amusing topical reference. Whoever's been briefing this has been watching too much celebrity traitors and this is just about the worst attack on a faithful I've seen since Joe Marla was kicked out

and banished in the final. Yeah, not bad. I can't wait to hear what quip he came up with for Good Morning Britain. What's happened to me overnight is the most unjustified attack on a faithful

since Joe Marla was banished in the final. Seems a bit familiar, doesn't it? But I'm sure he came up with something great for LBC. The most appalling attack on a faithful I've seen since Joe Marla was banished in the final. I know it's hard to believe West Streeting repeated himself three times

because he didn't, he did it seven times in total adding the today program BBC Breakfast, Channelful News and an NHS providers conference in Manchester They do say if you keep repeating something it does start to lose all meaning much like the phrase we promise not to increase taxes But surely Wes Streeting's aide managed to watch one other program he could talk about. Whoever's been briefing this should spend a little less time watching celebrity traitors and a bit more time watching CountryFile.

Ah, yes, CountryFile. If there's one group that absolutely love Labor, it's Farmers. You're listening to The Naked Week. In the week when Wes Streeting also denied having anything to do with the kidnapping of a champion racehorse... I had nothing to do with Shergaar. Now, I may have a very suspicious mind, but I think there's no way you'd say that

unless you definitely were involved in the kidnapping of Shergar. And speaking of glue, it's time... Once more, to take a big huff of investigative journalism. And to help us do that, please welcome the Naked Week's Chief Huffer and Observer Whitehall editor, Kat Neelan. Kat, what is this week's voter concern?

An all-time classic, Andy, immigration. Ah, yes. Play the hits. None of these new voter concerns like AI deepfakes or whether there's an underlying health cause for Celia Imre's flatulence. Exactly. A recent UGov poll found that immigration and asylum is still the number one issue for voters.

And this week, the Home Office has been gauging support for a shiny new approach. The government is due to announce a major shake-up of immigration rules with Denmark's system seen as a model. Hmm. Denmark. Bit ironic bringing in a foreign immigration system instead of employing a good old-fashioned British one.

But all right, the system is broken. Clearly some do take advantage of it, but presumably there are also innocent people caught in the middle. Well, yes. If employers know the loopholes, they can exploit the rules about migrant work visas. Last year, a BBC investigation found that a Cambridgeshire branch of McDonald's

was employing victims of human trafficking. I bet they weren't loving that. I know you're thinking that joke is in poor taste, but so is the new pineapple McSpickey. Obvious question then, Kat, has the Home Office done anything to combat this sort of thing? Yeah, they revoked almost 2,000 visa sponsorship licenses from various organizations in the 12 months up to June this year. Great. However, the Naked Week has uncovered another example of flagrant abuse of migrant workers in the fast food industry.

And seeing us tonight, we're trying to raise cash for the BBC, let's play an advert. Papa John is not interested in quality. He's obsessed with it. Better ingredients, better pizza, Papa John's. Right, so Papadjohn's, I believe, named after its founder, the late Pope John Paul II. Sure. Nobody's fact-checking at the BBC this week. Great.

What has his holiness been up to? Well, technically not Papa John's itself, because it runs a franchise system. So an individual or a company buys the rights to Papa John's name and sells its products while operating semi-independently. It's the same system used by Domino's. Ah, Domino's. The David Walliams of food. It's not the official slogan, but it's there if they want it. Our investigation identified a former owner of 13 separate Papa John franchises in Devon and Cornwall,

a man named Jabamantas. Now, the Home Office granted him a visa sponsorship licence. Which is? No, it's nothing to do with witches. But it does allow him to... It does allow him to recruit foreign workers for his pizza shops via a WhatsApp group. The advert was titled... Papa Jones Work Visa Available.

Jones. Okay, not a great start. No, but it continued all over UK. Sponsorship fee required, no experience required, no qualifications needed. Oh, interesting. Tim Davy, we know you're listening. Start buffing that CV up. Did anyone apply for these jobs?

Lots of people, including one we've spoken to, an Indian student studying in the UK whose visa was about to expire. Jabba Mumtahs said that he would employ him at Papa John's and sponsor his work visa, but the student told us he was later forced to pay £14,000. Okay, for what? Well, that's a good question. Normally, the fee is a couple of grand, and covered by the employer in any case. Right.

On top of this, multiple sources told us they were still owed thousands of pounds in unpaid wages and that they were often forced to do extra days' work without any pay at all. And for legal reasons, Kat, how confident are you that that fits the definition of modern slavery? As confident as I am that... Papa John is not interested in quality. He's obsessed with it. Did the student confront his boss about the working conditions? Yes.

But when he and his colleagues message Mr Mumtaz to ask for the money they were owed, it didn't go too well. Let's be very clear about something here. I don't like the tone of your message. If you're unhappy, I can request the department to cancel your visa and you can work elsewhere. Right. So the person at the home office gave a green light to organise visas for migrant workers, threatened to cancel those visas instead of paying the workers what they were legally entitled to. It seems that way. We were also told that Mumtaz would ask staff to sell out-of-date stock. that most of the stores are disgusting and rarely get cleaned. Okay, so presumably Papadjohn's was onto this like a rat on a pepperoni. Well, they commissioned what they called a thorough review and ended their working relationship with Jabba Muntas,

resulting in the closure of all 13 stores. Although our sources say this only happened after Mumtaz had done a runner. Well, he just disappeared and nobody noticed. Like maplins. Oh, wow. So, Kat, surely Papadjohn's has to be able to. have some kind of vetting process for their franchise owners? Not really, Andy. Remember?

Papa John is not interested in quality. Fair enough. But again, this is someone who the home office decided could be trusted. So who is Jabba Mammtas? Back in the early noughties, he was running 18 franchises of Subway. How did that go? Well, in 2012, his sandwich empire folded after incurring debts of over two million pounds. If a sandwich empire folds, does it become a flatbread empire? No, no, my.

I presume the Home Office has revoked his visa licence. You would indeed assume so, Andy, but it was only as a direct result of our reporting this week that those licences were finally cancelled. What, we've got something done? It looks that way. We will take action as soon as a Radio 4 topical comedy show gets in touch and ask us about it.

A Home Office spokesperson said, we have taken action against all three companies and revoked their licences. And Jabamontas told us... All these allegations are false, misleading and damaging to my personal and professional reputation. I categorically reject each and every one of them. I have operated in full compliance with UK employment and immigration law at all times. And did we ask Papa Johns for a statement?

Yes, but it took longer than 30 minutes to arrive, so they also sent us some free garlic bread. They said, Papa John's does not tolerate any form of worker exploitation or breaches of UK employment or immigration law. The individual in question was an independent franchisee and his actions are entirely contrary to Papa John's values and standards. Well, fair play. That is a quality response. Papa John is not interested in quality. Sorry, I was forgetting that. I'm sure there won't be any repercussions at all

for how we've edited that clip. Kat Neeland, everybody. You're listening to The Naked Week. Still to come, the Today program reveals that while Trump is furious at the BBC, he will still honour his agreement to be a guest on the next series of Radio 4's Just a minute.

He has an obligation to sue. Hmm. And we don't hesitate to say to Trump's lawyers, with repetition, that those newly released Epstein emails in no way suggest deviation. All right. So, in her interview with The Telegraph this week, the White House propaganda machine,

who called the BBC a leftist propaganda machine, Caroline Levitt, had this to say... Every time I travel to the United Kingdom with President Trump, and I'm forced to watch the BBC in our hotel rooms, it ruins my day. I doubt she's the only woman whose day has been ruined. ruined in a hotel room with Donald Trump. You know what, never mind.

Never mind. Two billion. Now, luckily, for Caroline Levitt's viewing habits, The Naked Week, has managed to get hold of the BBC's newest listings magazine, The Impartial Radio Times. Milo Edwards is the Naked Week's newest listings magazine correspondent. After this week, the corporation's had no option

but to go nuclear on neutrality. This is indeed the new impartial radio times. 63 pages of equality and balance, plus another five of adverts for walking bars and river cruises. Okay, so could you take us through some of the BBC's new programmes? Here's one I'm looking forward to. Wednesday night, BBC One, race across the world, but not one race in particular, because representation matters.

Here's one from the Home Office. Monday's on BBC One. Escape to the country of origin, where your asylum claim will be processed in due course. And for balance, Saturday night, a new series of Doctor Who came here. illegally. Very nice. Sunday at 10.1

Songs of praise. And for balance, that's followed by Songs of Criticism. What about children's TV? Surely that's free of bias. Quite the opposite, Andy. Riddled with imbalance. Take Bluey, an incredibly popular show for Under Sevens, but the clues in the name. Bluey, blatantly conservative. So Labor are offsetting that with a new kids program called Sesame Streeting.

That's looking likely to replace Starmer's pyjamas after the local elections in May. Reassuringly balanced. Milo Edwards, everybody. So, in the week, the BBC pushed other news off the front page. You might be forgiven for wondering if there's actually anything else going on. Scroll far enough down the BBC news feed, past pictures of a sad Tim Davy and one weirdly of a cursed potato.

And you might, if you're very lucky, have stumbled across this. The United Nations Climate Change Summit. COP 30 opens today in the Brazilian city of Belém. That's right. Cop turns 30. Happy birthday cop, your sexy climate conference. 30 and feeling flirty. Unfortunately, what COP is flirting with is totally irrelevant.

As exemplified by this headline from Channel 4 News... Cop 30. What is the point? Cheer up, Channel 4. At least you've still got a news division. It's a fair question, given that many countries sent only low-level delegates, while the US government didn't send any officials at all. Still, crisis or no crisis, the beleaguered Beeb did actually send its boys to Brazil. Here is climate editor Justin Rowlett, reaching the limit of the human brain's ability to process numbers.

It's always chaotic. You know, I can't remember the actual number of world leaders. It's like 57 or something. Hard to count. It's not that hard to count, is it, Justin? 57. I mean, Heinz can manage that, and they make ketchup. Part of the problem is that, unlike previous...

COPS, which produced the Paris Agreement. This one doesn't have a stated aim. It's a meeting that really could have been an email. So what is the hook? What is the narrative? There are only so many times Ed Milibang can look sad in a pack-a-mac. How many times, Justin? It's like 57 or something? Hard to count. Watch out Rachel Riley. Somebody's after your job. Cop 30 has been being largely ignored by everyone. Cop needs help. It needs to attract people's attention. No one's talking about COP at all. But what they are still talking about, especially where streeting is traitors.

And that is how you bag yourself an audience these days. And it's not just casual viewers. Where would the Guardian be without wall-to-wall coverage of the traitors? Well, it would be where it always is spread out on the floor for the dog. But the point stands to get in the news and stay

in the news, you need to craft a compelling narrative with compelling storylines and shocking twists, heroes and villains. How do you traitors up a boring old climate conference? Well, to find out, please welcome from, you'll remember he was stabbed in the back by Harry in series two, it's Paul from traitors.

Hello, Paul. Paul, you were a traitor. Remind us what happened to you? I was, you know, I worked really hard, and I gathered my team together, and I thought I'm going to go through to victory, and then I was stabbed in the back. Pretty much what's going to happen to Keir Starmer

in the next couple of months. Paul, we should get down to business. How can we turn cop into the traitors? Well, it's quite easy. So instead of a summit, we just need to, or the global environmental ministers in a castle in Scotland, and then they just need to work out which of them are faithful to the cause of climate change.

Really? Yeah, very simple. And then you just have to sit back and work out which three of them are going to betray the rest. I'm guessing the USA, Russia and China. I can't comment on. Okay, all right, right. Well, I'm going to ask you a few quick questions

about how this might work, flesh it out a bit more. Okay. Would you trust Claudia Winkleman to ensure India and China phase out unabated coal power? The way I see it is, you know, she's got some good fringe policies. cool there you go all right um the world has made very slow progress on on climate uh on all sorts of things partly carbon emissions but also methane emissions yeah how much of that is down to celia remory yeah it's a it's a new part of the point yeah it is a crisis isn't it what if alan car was an electric car

i mean we laugh but i think he would never break down and have just an unlimited range brilliant that's great is there anything else before we wrap up yeah so i've got one thing for you you. This is your very own shield. Oh, thank you so much. Oh, thank you, Paul. That's wonderful. And it says something on the back here. It says, this shield gives the Naked Week immunity from being murdered by BBC board member and everyone's favourite potato, Robbie Gibb.

Paul from the trains, everybody. I am, and as always been Andrew Hunter Murray. Goodbye. The Naked Week was hosted by me, Andrew Hunter Murray, with guest correspondent Milo Edwards, the BNC, Oxford players, James Lacker, Holly Skinner, Amy Small and special guest, Paul from the Traitors. It was written by John Holmes, Katie Sayer, Garrettic, Jason Haisley and James Cattle, with Investigations team,

Kat Neelan, Kornak, Kehoe and Freya Shaw. Additional material by Sophie Dixon, Ali Panting, Darren Phillips, Cooper Mulweeney, Swirt and David Rifkin. The Naked Week is produced and directed by John Holmes and it's an unusual production for BBC Radio 4.