Friday Night Comedy from BBC Radio 4 - The News Quiz: Ep 4. Gear shifting and Shoplifting

Episode Date: February 7, 2025

This week on The News Quiz, Andy Zaltzman is joined by Simon Evans, Athena Kugblenu, Susie McCabe and Hugo Rifkind to unpack the week's new stories. In the week Keir Starmer set his sights on growth, the panel looked at backing of a third runway at Heathrow, a shoplifting epidemic, and the decline of urban chess in the streets of Nottingham.Written by Andy Zaltzman.With additional material by: Cameron Loxdale, Sascha LO, Meryl O'Rourke and Peter Tellouche. Producer: Rajiv Karia Executive Producer: Pete Strauss Production Coordinator: Jodie Charman Sound Manager: David Thomas Sound Editor: Marc WillcoxA BBC Studios Audio Production for Radio 4 An Eco-Audio certified Production.

This BBC podcast is supported by ads outside the UK. BBC Sounds Music radio podcasts. Welcome to the news quiz. I am Andy Zollstein. In case you're wondering, after last week's show from Dundee, we did eventually make it back south after storm Ayo and gave us a slightly longer than planned stay in Scotland and brought wild mayhem across the country. Now I'm not saying it definitely was divine retribution for us sending Liz Truss and Nigel Farage the other way across the ocean for Trump's

inauguration, but I am saying we definitely cannot rule that out as an explanation. And our teams this week, we have team Grasp the Nettle versus team Swiftly Remember Why Gloves Were Invented. On team Nettle we have Hugo remember why gloves were invented on team Nettle We have Hugo Rifkin and Simon Evans First question I'll give this to Hugo first What is the defining mission of the star of government according to a the prime minister in an article in the Times this week and? B according to A, the Prime Minister in an article in the Times this week, and B, according to you? Well, it's a secret. They can't tell us.

They got the mission a few months ago on one of those old-fashioned reels of tape and listened to it, and were asked if they wanted to accept it, and then it burst into flames. And we just have to hope they remember what it is, because there's no way of finding out now, certainly not from the plot, but there's going to be a lot of running, a lot of stunts. Rachel Reeves pulling her face off. And being Margaret Thatcher underneath. But apart from that, it's growth. According to them, it's growth. According to me, I think it's the fine dead Miller band. Right. Because where is he? He's been gone for ages.

He's going round and round on a huge wind turbine somewhere? It's like they've left him somewhere, like under a book or something. I don't know, it's really odd. It's like Wes Wally. But it's... Well, Wes Wallace, I suppose. Wes Wallace was the original working title for the film Braveheart. LAUGHTER Simon, according to you, what is the defining mission of The Starman Government? Well, I quite like the idea of it being, you know, the five-year mission of my youth was

James T. Kirk's five-year mission, the Starship or the Starmor Enterprise, to seek out new worlds and new civilisations and see if we could persuade them to come and live in Birmingham. What about you guys, what would you say is the defining mission of the Starmor government? To try and be as far away from the Labour Party principles as what they possibly can. It's like one of two things I can't work out, it's either to build a Death Star or to get free tickets to Glastonbury every year. This was an article in the Times, Hugo. You write for the Times.

Yeah, I didn't write that one. Right. Is this paving the way for a job swap? How would you? This is Kistama's article, where he was writing about, he wants to sweep away regulation. He's very big on that. Although it was really confusing,

because he likened regulation to Japanese knotweed. Yes. But he said he's pro-growth, but he wants to cut the thing that's like Japanese knotweed, which is the thing that grows the most. But he also said, we have shifted gears with a raft of pro-growth deregulation policies, and the one place you don't get gears is on a raft. That's a pedalo. So it was like, it was a thicket of mixed metaphors coming at us like a runaway

train out of a cannon. It's pretty ambitious though isn't it to want to create growth. I understand, I believe that growth might be their agenda but it's not just about regulations. You can't achieve net zero and make power four times more expensive than is the average in the other OECD countries and then expect growth to happen? I mean technically if the power companies are earning four times as much, that's growth. I suppose so, yeah. So, yeah, win-win.

Growth in jumpers. In the paper, so Tom Peck, our sketch writer, pointed out that where Rachel Reeves made her speech about growth was in a factory where they'd shut down all the machines so she could make a speech about growth. And if you want growth, what you don't want to do is shut down all the massive machines behind you and then stand in front of them, saying, we're going to have the machines doing more. What about when Rachel started talking about our 70-mile growth corridor? I thought, well,

you should get an ointment for that, love. That sounds like Japanese not wheat. I did feel a little bit sorry for Kemmy Badnock though, having to try and critique this, you know, during Prime Minister's questions and so on, because her line of attack was essentially, you're just doing all the things that we said we were going to do. It's like you did have 14 years to try and crack on with it. I think the Tories are realising they made a mistake electing Kemi Badnock. I think they're realising they made a mistake electing someone who's a Tory basically because they carry a burden with them of the previous failures.

Should have probably just like picked someone at random or maybe had a game show like kind of you know there's something when they try and get the lead in Sound of Music or something. One of those. I thought you were just going to stop there when you said they made a mistake in picking someone. Rather than just an aching void of nothingness, which I think is what the public is thirsting for in politics. It could have done it like if I got news for you with a rotating host for the next five years. I mean they did that for the last five years. I am also quite like the idea if we're going to

have all these gardening and agriculture messages and metaphors in politics, out with Rachel Reeves and with Charlie Demock. That's what I say. That's what I say. I want a braless red-headed siren looking after the economy. Andy, it's your time. All right, let's have another question. This can go to Susie and Athena. In an effort to boost growth, Chancellor Rachel Reeves announced that a third watt will come to pass.

Oh, very excited about this. We're going to get Greece 3. It's the runway, isn't it? You had to get a taxi from Dundee to Edinburgh, but yet Heathrow gets a third runway. I'm just saying, it's at any wonder Scotland is grumpy. It's the decline of the Labour Party, isn't it? It's from Tony Blair on the third way to Keir Starber on the third runway.

There was another transport project announced which is a train line from Oxford to Cambridge. Oh thank the Lord. Let me tell you there's six million people up the road who have been in tender hoops about the Oxford to Cambridge rail line. It's alright Glasgow, don't worry about the poverty. poverty. Look, I mean if the HS2 doesn't unlock the Northern Powerhouse and the Scottish economy by making it very slightly quicker to get from London to Birmingham, surely an Oxbridge train line will. And we can add an annual university train race to the sporting calendar. Does this excite you Simon? No, I think it's an excellent idea, yes. I mean I can see why it's open for mockery, but these are elite organisations.

They're one of the few things in which the British people really do lead the world. Oxford and Cambridge are often in the top five of the universities in the world. They're the only non-American universities in the top ten, along with Imperial. I think they should create a triangle. I think in fact our country should be formed of a series of Interlocking triangles between centers of excellence. I would like to see Norwich and Ipswich I've said it before be restored to their medieval status of centers of excellence for the wool trade. I Guess when the Oxbridge train is broken you get on a real replacement service to Durham or Bristol or Bristol. So Aston has been criticized for the environmental impact of some of these growth policies particularly the third runway will he be able to hit net

zero do you think I'm talking about environmental goals rather than his approval rating? The third runway is going to have an impact on net zero obviously and we are I mean unless they make it only available to battery powered flights or something I don't know just gliders or something it is it is it is something it's knows that anyone who has yes is encountering the expenses of running a vehicle of any kind but I think it could possibly be offset by expanding the network of cycle lanes and in particular I would like to see a series of cycle lanes through London that are only available to Jeremy Vine.

So, well, the government's made various suggestions for how to spark growth via infrastructure projects. Let's see if our panellists have got any better ones. So what can get this country moving, Athena? I'll host the Olympics all the time. Right. Yeah, every four years just have it here, because that was great and I really enjoyed that. And it'll be in a different city every four years in this country, done.

I'd like to see more bat tunnels. Right. You heard about the bat tunnel. Yeah, yeah. It's a bat tunnel in Buckinghamshire that they built to save the bats and it cost £100 million, which they worked out was £300,000 per bat. And obviously the obvious problem, because basically this tunnel, it was a tunnel that went over a railway line so the bats didn't get hit by trains. These things are meant

to be able to navigate in the dark, you think they could spot a train, particularly the speeds they move in this country. But the fundamental flaw with it was basically this is a tunnel for the trains, not for the bats. But the thing bats really, really like, famously, is tunnels. So if you build a tunnel, the bats are going to go in the tunnel, they're not going to be out of the tunnels. But I think the problem was there weren't enough bat tunnels. So if you actually leave the train running free, but cover the rest of Britain in bat tunnels, problem solved.

Right. Yeah. And a big project. What about if we maybe rejoin the customs union or the EU? That might boost growth again. Leave the bats alone man. But it's funny that's the one thing they don't say. They're like oh there's no trade, there's no growth, no one's coming here, no one intelligence coming here, no one wants to work here, can't think why. And then they say maybe Nigel Farage can solve this problem. It is interesting and perhaps counterintuitive and not what we expected that since Britain withdrew from the European Union we have swung massively to the left and the European Union is now starting to embrace the politics of the 1930s.

I don't know these things are quite curious. You're not seeing an enormous amount of growth in Europe at the moment whether that's because we're not there I don't know, these things are quite curious. You're not seeing an enormous amount of growth in Europe at the moment, whether that's because we're not there, I don't know. I'm a big fan of Europe, I grew up there. Grew up in a lovely little European town called Tunbridge Wells, which is 900 miles north of Barcelona, or if you're in Tallinn just head west and keep going. But I love Europe, any continent in Europe that can produce both Michelangelo and Michael Atherton.

Right, yes. continent, Europe, any continent that can produce both Michelangelo and Michael Atherton. Right, yes, so, well this is the message from the Prime Minister and the Chancellor this week. Here Stammer pledged to the nation that he would be, hang on, we need to make this sound a bit more convincing than Stammer generally manages. The killer of weeds, the kicker down of barriers, the axe wielding chainsawing slayer of red tapes, the grasper of nettles, the unleasurer of progress, for I am Starmsey, the indestructible one, fear my power. He promised to speed up decision making. Maybe try improving it as well as speeding it up. That might be arguably even more important.

I mean, if the speeded up decision is to make another HS2 style call to boost the economy and quality of life of people in the north of England and reduce urban deprivation in Scotland by, let's say, building a high speed ice canal link from Islington to Bogna Regis, that might not be what the country needs. For now, Heathrow's third runway remains up in the air, which is the budget cheaper option for it, of course. Obviously, trying to boost growth and national prosperity with infrastructure projects is

a bit square these days. Far easier to do it, as we learn from our American superiors, by persecuting minorities and renaming geographical features. Maybe we just need to tweak the Irish Sea to the UK Northern Irish Sea, Spain to North Gibraltar, Denmark to West Northumberland, and the North Sea to the newly branded Madbets 247 Sea Casino. The problem is, looking back at the UK over the last few decades of deregulated wealth creation and the North Sea oil boom, is that rather than mending the roof while the sun shone, we sold the roof while the sun shone.

Conservative Shadow Chancellor Mel Stride said the government, quote, does not understand business or where wealth comes from. Of course, the previous Tory government also appeared not to know where wealth came from, but at least it did have a very good steer on where the wealth was going to. Right. At the end of that round, the scores are three points all. So our next question. according to research, British people do it more than

twice as much as the French, we also do it more than twice as much as the Americans. What is it? Is it slagging off Americans and the French? It's online shopping, isn't it? I love this story because Britain loves online shopping more than anyone else in the world but simultaneously moan at the dilapidation on our city's high streets So it's like we love the high street. I like the idea of it being pretty but I don't want to leave the house So I'm just gonna go online and do it. Brilliant. It's the most British thing I've ever heard in my entire life. It's like moaning, queuing and the rain. It's just tremendous.

I think the fact that we are doing online shopping because we don't want to go out because all the high streets are ruined with charity shops, sunbed shops and no actual shops and we just moan about it all. What a country. and no actual shops and we just moan about it all. What a country. It's not destroying the high street as much as we think it is because I don't know if you've been to a post office recently but nothing is thriving more in this online economy than the queue for the bloody post office. Oh my God, it comes out the door.

Amazon wants to start delivering things by drones. Did you see that? They've got in Darlington what they call a pilot scheme, which is so obviously the wrong name. They're doing it in Darlington. They're massive things, the drones. And I was speaking to somebody about this this week. I was interested to see how it works, how you're going to stop people stealing the drones,

stealing the stuff from the drones. And I was told the thing is the drones, they're not going to land with the stuff. They're just going to drop the stuff from like 15 to 20 feet up. And they had an earlier pilot scheme in America where they did this and they tested it out by dropping something in people's driveways and the thing they decided that was the perfect thing to drop in people's driveways was cans of soup. Can you imagine anything more terrifying than being bombed with soup by an Amazon drone? If you deliver the can of soup from the drone at the right angle,

you can bounce it along a reservoir to someone who lives on top of a dam. Through the letterbox, yeah. Well, the problem is as well, you won't be able to go to the post office anymore when you want to return it. You're just going to have to stand in the garden and throw it up. It's really dangerous. But who's ordering soup online? Do you know who's Uber eating all over the tomato soup, please?

That's too far. That's too far. My mother, for my birthday last year, sent me from Amazon a can of haggis. Did it take out the dog on the way down? I would like to know how much of the online shopping is done whilst whilst drunk because I think that's the key factor isn't it? Give us the edge over the late night. Yeah, I enjoy that late at night. You have a couple, you know decent glass of shopping scotch You sit there in your pants and nobody knows Anything if you can shop in the high street, you're judged you can feel people looking at you can't do it She's rifling through the opportunities.

But in the frivolity of your own home. What are you buying? Surely I have demonstrated that I'm not willing to divulge that. No, I feel guilty about this, because, yeah, the high street is in a terrible state. And I was partly to blame as well. In the 80s, I got my first Saturday job

was in Dixon's selling computers from the high street. It's like suicide, right? We didn't think about it at the time. We are going to have to think about alternatives for the high street because it's becoming very dismal, isn't it? And I think basically kenneling for students is probably the most obvious thing. Just sort of move students in there in the evenings basically. But we're not spending more time shopping, we're just spending more money. Something like Britain spend like two hours a week internet shopping, and the Chinese spend eight hours a week internet shopping, but spend far less money.

And I don't know if that's because everything's just cheaper in China, or if they're just really bad at it. They've got 3,000 characters on their keyboards. It just takes a really long time. What's the one that looks like a can of soup? But so much of what we buy comes from China, like Xi'an and countries like that. So we're spending two hours obviously like buying from these companies and they're just spending eight hours laughing at us. like buying from these companies and they're just spending eight hours laughing at us.

Yeah so despite being world leaders in online shopping we spend little time doing so are we more impulsive or just more efficient do we just buy the first thing we see before working out exactly what to do with our shiny new Freddy Krueger themed fridge freezer or back consignment of Balinese fighting fish that we always wanted? I think we're just all in a state of depression that we're just looking for a dopamine hit. That's what it is. I don't think anyone's sitting going I really need a little spoon that will crack open the top of my boiled egg. Listen I am saying this as someone who bought a Hoover that was specifically for Lego. I am that soldier. I think part of the reason the French don't do it is because they like to regard shopping as a stylish exercise, don't they? They have their pâtisserie and their boulangerie and they have that incredible shop where you

can buy both tobacco and stamps. It's historical right? Marie Antoinette famously said let them eat cake and the world laughed but now they have patisseries and we have Greggs and I think they're something too. So her sacrifice was worthwhile. Yes. Many people claim that a lot of Britain's economic and financial difficulties come from people spending money on things that we don't actually need. Personally, I think this is subjective and ridiculous and I would say that I definitely need my random jingle generator 3000X, a brilliant device that turns anything you say into a

jingle. It turns anything you say into a jingle. Worth every penny. Our next question is going to go to Susie and Athena, a little maths question for you here. Based on current food prices, in order to meet the government recommended healthy diet, a household with children in the least well off 20% of the population would need to spend 70% of its disposable income on food.

If a top level Premier League footballer spent the same% of its disposable income on food. If a top-level Premier League footballer spent the same proportion of his disposable income on healthy food and had been put by his manager on an apple-only diet, how many apples would he buy every week? LAUGHTER Oh. In this country, after Brexit, 20 apples. LAUGHTER

I'm afraid you've gone a little low on that. I think it would be 100 apples but that would hurt his teeth too much so I think he would just go for apple hubba bubba. Two and a half million apples. You're closer. It's 829,104 apples. Okay. Admit it, I just made that number up.

But look, that's written down so I'll give one point to Simon for that. I mean this is in terms of the kind of cost of living crisis which we're still struggling with. It's, yeah, healthy meals become twice as expensive per calorie as junk food. What can we learn about the state of the nation from what we eat, do you think? I think it's interesting when people try and talk to us about this because when I was growing up there was only two types of fruit that you could get ornamental or tinned. Either way your teeth were damaged for the rest of your life. One of the most criminal things that's happened in this

country definitely over let's say 15 20 years is that they've made really basic things middle class. I used to have an old job and I once took out a mango out of my bag and someone went ooh la di da! And I was like it's a mango, it's a bit of fruit, it's a bit MNC. Like fruit and veg is like a basic thing, it grows from the ground, you pick it up and you eat it. For it to be kind of out of people's financial reach is sort of criminal. You think the working class need to reclaim mangoes?

All of them, mangoes, bananas, pears, they're not expensive things but they are now being thought of as expensive and it's bizarre so I think the next working class movement, you know, you can support striking workers or you can talk about the NHS and carers, actually what you've got to do is eat a plum. Eat a plum for Britain. Increasingly, there's concern about the unhealthiness of red meat products. It's now becoming as socially marginalized as smoking.

Some businesses even have special shelters outside their offices where people can sneak out for a cheeky hot dog. Got Gotta wait till someone invents an E sausage and all becomes fine again. They start selling unregulated raspberry milkshake flavored salamis to schoolchildren. And then of course taxation goes up on meat products and it'll become cheaper for people to roll their own which see someone at a bus stop rolling a sheath of pig's gut with some mashed up entrails, gonads and connective tissue before tucking it behind their ear as one for later. I think that's not the country we want to embrace. Spoken like a man who's received ten taggis.

Our final question in our shopping section. Increasingly brazen with no fear of the consequences because of the knowledge that they won't be jailed. A description which has brought together the unlikely combination this week of American presidents and in Britain, which purveyors of an ancient craft? Is this a shoplifting? Yes, shoplifting. Great British. It's an ancient craft.

Yes, it is. It's a craft. Yes, but you see Stonehenge was originally set up as a shop. And they nicked the walls. They nicked everything apart from the stone. It's our second profession. Yeah, so there's an epidemic. Yes. People are doing it brazenly. Retail crime is supposed to be out of control. Shoplifters are just helping themselves to stuff. Nobody stops them. They have no fears of any consequences. Right, I'm going to play devil's advocate. Is it

short lifting or is it we geez for having to use the self-checkout? I think the obvious thing to do is arm the grannies, isn't it? That would be, because it's difficult for the shops, they don't want to take legal responsibility for getting involved in an escalated violence. But if you gave all pensioners tasers that they could use, they would be inclined to do so and they obviously, you know, the public sentiment would be on their side. I think that might be a way to stop it. Yeah, for everyone you catch you could get a bit of your winter food allowance back. Yeah. To earn it. You can have it but you've got to earn it, F a way to stop it. Yeah, and everyone you catch, you can get a bit of your winter food allowance back. Yeah. To earn it. You can have it, but you've got to earn it, F-all. Earn it.

No, you can't give a pensioner a taser. I've seen them trying to use a smartphone and... LAUGHTER You get the pensioner-friendly tasers with just the three big buttons and none of the others. Spoken like a man that's nearly at pensionable age. LAUGHTER Yes, you know the economy is struggling spoken like a man that's nearly at pensionable age. Yes, you know the economy is struggling when even Adam Smith's invisible hand has been

stealing from the pick and mix. Measures such as posters saying stop, don't shoplift have, for whatever reason, not worked. It would have been all as allowing shoplifting if the stolen objects are put into a museum, which always used to work for us, nor even has the problem been solved by having a security guard in a pantomime lion outfit wandering up and down the meat aisle growling. The government response is to announce a new scheme encouraging shoplifters to show their appreciation for the shops that make their work possible by tipping the shop to the value of the good stolen. Sadly, it also does not work.

Another fundamental problem is that a free trip to Australia just isn't the deterrent that it once was. Right, at the end of our shopping round, Simon and Hugo have five, Susie and Athena have six. Right, moving on now. Five, Susie and Athena have six. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right, moving on now. Let's go to Susie and Athena. What will reach 72 and a half by 2032?

Oh, Heathrow, we're gonna get 72 and a half runways. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Definitely. No one in Scotland. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. It's the... Jeremy Clarkson. Right, he will be 72 and a half. Born in 1960. Right. Scotland. Jeremy Clarkson. Right, he will be 72 and a half. Born in 1960. Right. Yeah. Like Nigeria. He's in a pod in so many ways. And chocolate buttons in the Etch A Sketch. Right. As well. Yeah, 1960. Is it gonna be the age at which you can retire? Is it the length of mortgages in 2025? Nigella Lawson. Yep. 72. Yep. Is it the length of mortgages in 2025? Nigella Lawson.

Yep. 72. That year, yeah. Prince Andrew. John McEnroe as well. Antonio Banderas. And Cameroon. It was a big year for African independence, as I would say.

Did Cameroon and Nigeria have a joint birthday party? They could do. With Ghana and Togo. And Somalia. Isn't the internet fun? And Nigeria have a joint birthday party they could do with Ghana and Togo Isn't the Internet fun It's the ONS is anticipated Population of Great Britain 72 and a half million people which represents I think another five million in the next eight years or something like that Yeah, that's more people than they have in France

So the first time we're going to have more people here than in France, the people, let's have them. The Daily Mail reported the five million population rise that is looming. Said it was shocking. It said shocking, like 10 Manchesters. And it was like, it's not that bad, 10 Manchesters. A bit harsh on Manchester.

It's not like it's Glasgow. Let's have another question now Richard the third the controversial former monarch and prototype social media pylon cancellation victim was famously Dug up in a car park in Leicester But why were kings in general removed from a car park in nearby Nottingham this week anyone? Just the chess. Yes, the chess table that's put in a car park. Correct. I felt this story was really unfair because there's lots of people complaining that there's a chess board in a car park

because that's not what car parks for. But another way of looking at it is it's just a chess park with absolutely excellent parking. What would you say is one of the best games to play in a car park that don't require a council-funded concrete chess table that is un- Twister. Right. As a perimenopausal woman, I quite enjoy playing Where Did I Park My Car? Oh, in Edinburgh, great. Well, that means that this week's show is a tenal draw.

APPLAUSE Thank you, Simon and Hugo, Susie and Athena. Thank you for listening to the News Quiz. Goodbye. APPLAUSE Taking part in the News Quiz were Simon Evans, Athena Kuplenu, Susie McCabe and Hugo Rifkin. In the chair with me, Andy Zoltman, and additional material was written by Cameron Locksdale, Sasha Lowe, Meryl O'Rourke and Peter Toulouch.

The producer was Rajiv Kharia and it was a BBC Studios audio production for Radio 4. Hello, this is Marian Keyes. And this is Tara Flynn. We host a podcast you might like for BBC Radio 4 and BBC Sounds called Now You're Asking. Each week we take real listeners' questions about life, love, lingerie, cats, dogs, dentists, pockets, or the lack of, anything really, and apply our worldly wisdom in a way which we hope will help. But also hopefully entertain. Join us, why don't you? Search up Now You're Asking on BBC Sounds. Tankin' You.

Yoga is more than just exercise. It's the spiritual practice that millions swear by. And in 2017, Miranda, a university tutor from London, joins a yoga school that promises profound transformation. It felt a really safe and welcoming space. After the yoga classes I felt amazing. But soon, that calm, welcoming atmosphere leads to something far darker, a journey that leads to allegations of grooming, trafficking and exploitation across international borders. I don't have my passport, I don't have my phone, I don't have my bank cards, I have

nothing. The passport being taken, the being in a house and not feeling like they can leave. World of Secrets is where untold stories are unveiled and hidden realities are exposed. In this new series, we're confronting the dark side of the wellness industry, where the hope of a spiritual breakthrough gives way to disturbing accusations. You just get sucked in so gradually

and it's done so skillfully that you don't realize. And it's like this, the secret that's there. I wanted to believe that, you know, that whatever they were doing, even if it seemed gross to me, was for some spiritual reason that I couldn't understand. Revealing the hidden secrets of a global yoga network. I feel that I have no other choice. The only thing I can do is to speak about this and to put my reputation and everything else on the line. I want truth and justice and for other people to not be hurt, for things to be different in the future. To bring

it into the light and almost alchemize some of that evil stuff that went on and take back the power. World of Secrets Season 6, The Bad Guru. Listen wherever you get your podcasts.