From the Kitchen Table: The Duffys - Looking Back On Love & Reality TV With The Duffys

Episode Date: January 5, 2023

On this episode, Sean and Rachel look back to a discussion about how they met on the MTV show "Road Rules" and talk about their time on the reality show “The Real World”.   Sean and Rachel touch upon gaining fame through television, the outrageous challenges that they had to endure while on "Road Rules" and talk about the early days of their relationship. Later, Rachel talks about how through sacrifice, anyone can achieve a great family, along with a great career.   Follow Sean and Rachel on Twitter: @SeanDuffyWI & @RCamposDuffy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's hockey season, and you can get anything you need delivered with Uber Eats. Well, almost, almost anything. So no, you can't get an ice rink on Uber Eats. But iced tea, ice cream, or just plain old ice? Yes, we deliver those. Gold tenders, no. But chicken tenders, yes. Because those are groceries, and we deliver those too.

Along with your favorite restaurant food, alcohol, and other everyday essentials. Order Uber Eats now. For alcohol, you must be legal drinking age. Please enjoy responsibly. Order Uber Eats now. For alcohol, you must be legal drinking age. Please enjoy responsibly. Product availability varies by region. See app for details. Hey, everyone. Welcome to From the Kitchen Table. I'm your host, Sean Duffy, along with my co-host for the podcast, my partner in life, in all things Duffy family, Rachel Campos Duffy. Hey Sean, it's so great to be back at The Kitchen Table. I love that we're doing two shows a week,

because I feel like we had so much to say and it wasn't enough on one show. two shows a week because I feel like we had so much to say and it wasn't enough on one show. And something else has happened in the last few weeks since we went to two shows a week. And that is that our daughter started to help us with our social media. And we needed help. And it needed help because we're kind of old and she's kind of young and way more hip than we are. And she suggested that we do this thing that was trending on TikTok. Now we're gonna talk about the fact that we joined on TikTok. There's some issues I have with that,

but that's another show. Let's put that aside for just a second because I do wanna do a show on that. But we did this TikTok trending video. So there's a song called, I'm Just a Teenage teenage dirtbag, right? And people were basically playing the song and putting up pictures of when they were young and, you know, dirtbags, I guess. Yeah, so we did it, we kind of danced to the song and then afterwards put up pictures in this little video of when we were young and when we met on the real one and a half million views and people were like

what some people were like watching it because they remembered us but other people were like i knew that show i didn't realize you were on fox and then other people were like i saw you on fox i didn't realize you were on the real world and so i thought it'd be fun sean for us just to talk about how we met a lot of people don't remember, don't know. And maybe we could just kind of memorialize it for our own kids. We did this video for TikTok and you said that we were dancing. Dancing is in quotes for me because I cannot dance. Now I try. I'm a really good sport.

You know, I'll puff out the bottom lip or bite the lip and do the close shoulder dance. You know, this old guy dance, right? That's what I was doing. No, it's a white boy thing. White boy dancing. That's fine. Wisconsin dance. I have no talent. I can't sing. I can't dance. But I've tried, and it's really embarrassing and bad. add. But so let's talk about how we met because some people were surprised that we met on reality TV. So we both did shows called The Real World. It was the first reality TV show that really struck it big in America. And what the show was is they take seven strangers from all different walks of life and have them live in a house together. And when people are of different mindsets and viewpoints and cultures and backgrounds and you put them in a house and. And when people are of different mindsets and viewpoints and cultures and backgrounds, and you put them in a house and they live together, you get drama, you get

conflama. And that was what the show was based on. Very popular in the 90s. You did the season in San Francisco, a very popular, famous season. I did a way less popular season in Boston four years after you completed yours. That's right. And then what they decided because the show had just blown up. I mean, it's hard for people to understand now because there's so many different platforms to watch television in different places that young people do things on from Snapchat to, you know, to TikTok and then all Netflix and all the stuff they have. But back then there was only one place for young people to go and then all Netflix and all the stuff they have. But back then, there was only one place for young people to go. And that was MTV. And so it was sort of this unifying youth thing. And it

was all music videos until the real world came along and really introduced the idea of reality television. And you're right, Sean, it was, you know, a lot of drama. In fact, the directors of the show, one came from the soap opera world and the other came from the documentary world. And so they came together and did this. And, you know, it was so popular. There was, you know, you know, and I know when we did the show, I mean, we couldn't go anywhere and not have young people recognize who we were after. And it was pretty mind-blowing and a little bit trippy. I think it kind of tripped me out for a while. It was both good and bad in terms of, you know, just this instant fame that you didn't know really earned

because you didn't really do anything but live with people. Right, you lived your life on camera and you became kind of famous. It's almost like a... But it was kind of fun too. And so it was so famous sean that they decided to do a spin-off and they picked one person from each cast to do a travel adventure show called road rules all-star and they picked me from my cast and you from your cast and um i went to vermont where um they flew me to to Vermont and they put me on a train.

And at every single stop, one roommate came on. The next four roommates for the road trip came on. And you were at the last stop, if you recall, Sean. Oh, I recall. And what's crazy is that the first moment we ever met is actually captured on video. It's on tape, right? So what happens is everyone starts getting off the train, and Rachel is the last one. And if you know Rachel, like I do or anyone does, she packs a lot.

She overpacks all the time. And for this adventure trip, she overpacked and had this massive bag that was, like, really heavy. So Eric Neese, who was on the show, he was on the first season, came down. He's like, okay, listen, you got Rachel. And basically I grabbed her bag as she came off the train. We met for the first time. And as I say, I've been carrying her bag ever since

when she walked off the train that day. But yeah, so we met and we have that meeting on tape. And then we went on this three-week adventure where Real World did this road rules adventure. We were on the East Coast. We went over to New Zealand, the Northern Island, and then we came back to the West Coast of the United States. Each of those stops were for a week. And it was really fun. We got to know each other really well because we're living on a, what do we call it, Winnebago. We had a Winnebago we traveled in. a, on a, what we call the Winnebago. We had a Winnebago

we traveled in. We slept in hotels, but also in the Winnebago. And we kind of, we, we, we hit it off pretty well at the start. We became kind of friends. Well, we, we, we, along the way, Sean, we were doing these little, we had to earn money along the way. Right. And so we had all these different adventures that we had to do, do. And things that i mean there's no way outside of this experience you and i would you know repel off the tallest building in auckland new zealand for example or sheer sheep on a new zealand farm we sliced up the sheep it was horrible we can't we didn't know they should never have let us do that or remember when we went to a haunted insane asylum and we had to spend the night and we were with Ed and Lorraine, these very famous clairvoyants who were sort of the inspiration for what was the name of that movie? The Conjuring, I believe.

The Conjuring. Yes. Really freaky based on true life. So we did all these. Pause there for a second because I'm going, wait, pause there for a second, because what I'm going to go forward in time for a second. So when you do reality TV and you're that age and you do it, you never think that your kids are going to watch it later in life. And so our older kids started watching these seasons where we met. Oh, it's horrible. It's just horrible. Oftentimes the

kids will quote things that Rachel said in the real world back to her. And she's like, oh, shut up and stop watching old seasons of me in the real world. But when they watch this, this Ed and Lorraine season, you know, the, the, the clairvoyance, which the conjuring was made about, we're like, I think that was their names. Yeah, we did meet them. And they couldn't believe that we actually met the real Ed and Lorraine that the movie was based on. I think I think, Sean, hands down, that was like the coolest thing for them about us being on the show. Like they they love that movie. They think it's so freaky. And yeah, I mean, I believe at least one of them has passed away. And so like that we got to meet them and I mean we didn't just flippantly do something with them I mean we went to their house

we were they gave us a whole lecture on what we were to expect um meeting spirits and we went to this haunted insane asylum they prepared us for this and then we stayed there and of course i saw ghosts sean did not we he doesn't believe i did but i did i saw we made a joke of it and one of the guys on the trip was like i want the spirits in me and lorraine was like oh honey oh no no you no you don't don't ask the spirits to come in here you stupid yeah it was yeah it was freaky it was very freaky so anyway we did all these adventures and we got to know each other really well because we weren't just traveling we were having to work together on these different um things that we had to do and they were really remarkable things that we we got to do and we i

was dating someone actually when i was doing the show, I was dating this guy, this British guy. And then I met Sean and I wasn't sure I wanted to be with Sean. I thought he was really nice and fun, but it definitely made me realize I didn't want to be with the other guy. And so we did kiss and make out on that first, you know, on this on this adventure. make out on that first, you know, on this adventure. But then I think, Sean, if you're really honest, you were more into the relationship than I was at the end of the three weeks. We'll have more of this conversation after this. It's winter and you can get anything you need delivered with Uber Eats. Well, almost, almost anything. So no, you can't get snowballs on Uber Eats, but meatballs, mozzarella balls, and arancini balls?

Yes, we deliver those. Moose? No, but moose head? Yes, because that's alcohol and we deliver that too, along with your favorite restaurant food, groceries, and other everyday essentials. Order Uber Eats now. For alcohol, you must be legal drinking age. Please enjoy responsibly. Product availability varies by region. See app for details. Well, so here's what happened. So I was interested in Rachel, and I had to take off. So I was in law school. So I took off a semester from law school to do the real world. And then they said, hey, do you want to do this travel adventure?

And I'm like, sure, let me ask the dean if I can get a second semester off of law school, which I did. I got a second semester. Well, this show was done like the first of October. And so the next semester didn't start until the middle of January. So I had like three months to burn. And so I'm like, I know these people all out in LA. Why don't I go to LA for a couple months? To which I did. To hang out with all the ex real world. Yeah. And some of the producers on the show and whatnot. And so I'm like, and I'll hang out with all the ex-real world. Yeah, and some of the producers on the show and whatnot. And so I'm like, and I'll hang out with Rachel too.

And once I got there, Rachel had no interest. You make it sound so casual. Rachel had no interest in hanging out with me. It became quite obvious. And so with my Midwestern pride the way it is, I'm like, okay, fine, whatever. A little bit hurt because I thought we could hang out and have fun together and get to know each other more, maybe date. But she was living in Beverly Hills and a fabulous place and living her, at that point, best life because now it was her best life. But at that point, it was her best life to that point. And she didn't have

an interest in a Midwestern guy who had big cheesy glasses and a probably a bad haircut with a, with a leather kind of cowboy hat. Um, and so I had a great body, Sean, you were a three-time world champion, uh, lumberjack. So that was definitely in your favor. Um, but yeah, you're right. I was sort of like, not sure. I was just, I just graduated from, from graduate school, um, at university of California, San Diego. I was moving to L.A. You were really nice, but I wasn't sure that I really wanted to be in a relationship with you. And I was just moving to L.A. And so I thought, you know what?

I just want to do my thing. And I was a little bit annoyed. Like, why did he move to L.A. all of a sudden when he knew I was moving to L.A.? And I was like, what's going on? I definitely don't want to give him the wrong impression. So that kind of didn't end very well. Sean's feelings were really hurt that I wanted to date other people. So I was, to be fair, I was interested in her.

She was uninterested in me, to be fair. So it was like, again, I was unprideful. I'm like, okay, fine. I'll hang out with, I think it was Vince from Road Rules. I stayed at his place. I saw other, you know, saw like other friends that we had out there. But Rachel and I did not have a lot of contact because she was not very nice, just to be clear. She was interested in finding someone other than her soulmate at that time, which is fine.

So then Sean, so then Sean goes back to Minnesota where he goes to law school around the holiday time and he goes and he starts school. And then lo and behold, this weird thing happened. So like when you're on the real world, there were these speaking agencies that would hire real, real world kids to come like several at a time to some university somewhere in the country. And what they would do is they would bring us in at the beginning of semesters and have us, okay, remember like you're running, why would they do that? Well, the kids in college all watched our show. So everyone knew who we were. So we were actually, believe it or not, kind of famous on college campuses. So they would bring us to college campuses during orientation

week. And we would give these speeches about, you know, you know, what's it like to live with other people and conflict resolution. And we sort of wrapped it up in this, you know, we wrapped our, our, our visits up in something potentially useful to kids who are now going to be living in dorms. Cause we obviously had the experience of moving in with people that we didn't know. And that weren't very similar to us. And so I would make money going around and doing that, you know, maybe two or three times a month. And lo and behold, I got an assignment or a speaking gig in Milwaukee. And I thought, well, isn't that kind of close to where, where Sean lives? And I was worried because, you know, Sean left kind of PO that I wasn't that into him. And, but I knew I was going to run into Sean at reunions because the real world always had reunions and we all wanted to make a little

extra cash. And every time we went to reunion, we'd make a little bit of cash. So I knew I was going to see him. And I thought, you know what? I, I just want to be on good terms with him because we're going to see each other. And frankly, he's a really nice guy. Just want us to be good friends. Friends. I was in the friend zone. So to make sure we were securely in the friend zone. And so back then, Northwest was an airline before they merged with Delta and they were based out of Minneapolis. And so Rachel's flight from LA to Milwaukee was on Northwest and it stopped over in Minneapolis. And so she finished her speech and she's like, hey, I'm coming through Minneapolis.

Why don't we get together and, you know, go have a cup of coffee or go have some breakfast? To which, you know, I was not that hurt by her poor performance when I was out in L.A. I'm like, OK, fine, I'll come and get you in my Ford Contour white awesome car. I was very practical. I picked her up at the airport and I, we, William Mitchell law school was by the governor's residence and there was this famous little diner, a greasy spoon called the Uptowner. And so I went and picked her up and I'm like, let's just go have breakfast at the Uptowner. And we went there and sat down and ordered breakfast and had coffee and just

started catching up and chatting. And then what happened next, Rachel? Well, so again, I was just trying to repair this relationship so we could be friends. So it wouldn't be awkward when we saw each other at a real world reunion. And he picks me up, takes me to the uptowner, which if you've ever been, it's like a hole in the wall. We ordered a greasy breakfast as this greasy spoon would deliver. And we ended up staying for like, I don't know, it was like three hours. It was insane. Like, it felt like the time just flew by. And we were talking and laughing and having a good time. And somewhere in that conversation, it occurred to me in my head,

I'm like, wow, I mean, this is basically what lovers do. Like they can go to a place as dingy as this and have a great time and have fun and enjoy each other's company for three hours. And it feels like five minutes. And so at towards the end of the three hours, I looked up from my empty plate and I looked at Sean and I said, I think I'm going to marry you. And of course, what did you think, Sean? No, you actually said, I love you. And I'm going to marry you. Oh yeah, I did. I did. You're right. You're right. I did. I said, I love you and I'm going to marry you. Now, I was interested in pursuing, let's see where this relationship could go when I went out to L.A. Like, I was not in the marrying mood.

And all of a sudden, someone who had no interest in me all of a sudden has breakfast with me, which, by the way, I'm pretty compelling. I'm a compelling guy. And all of a sudden, she's like, I'm going to marry you. And I'm like, no. Okay, when's your departure? When's your flight leaving? No, I was, listen, I was taken back. I kind of said, I think that's really weird. Yeah, you did. I think I could tell that you

thought I was cuckoo. Yeah, a little cuckoo. Or we might say that Rachel had some deep seated affection for me that just wasn't allowed to come out at that point. You know, when I was in LA, she was like, no, he's, he's really wonderful. She saw me sing at Michael Jackson's studio, which I was amazing. One of our adventures. Yeah. And she heard me sing and was like, I was, I was pretty bad. You know what it was, Sean, you know, people who know my story know that I was in a very horrific car accident when I was in my, I don't know, I was like 23 or 24 years old. A couple of years after the real world that happened. Yeah. Yeah. And I was in a very serious relationship and, and this horrific car accident, which somebody hit, hit our, us head on, killed everybody in my car, including my boyfriend at that time.

And so I think I, I, even though I was like, Oh, I'm in LA and I'm having fun, you know, kind of when we first met right shortly after we did our show. Um, I think it was in that moment that we were at, I think it also matured me in a way, I think, is I guess what I'm trying to say, Sean. I think it matured me in a way that I didn't even realize until we were sort of in that moment at that diner. And I realized, you know, I didn't want to let you go, that you were a good person, that I had had, you know, I had had love at one point and lost it. And it was something in that moment matured me enough to go, you know what, I think had love at one point and lost it. And it was some, something in that moment matured me enough to go, you know what? I, I, I think I love this guy. And, you know, it wasn't like I just met you. We had traveled together and gotten to know each other over the, you know,

the course of, I don't know, four or five months. Um, you know, I don't believe in long engagements anyway. And so I told you I loved you and we dated and we've actually been together ever since. We haven't. So I was in, I was in law school in Minneapolis or in St. Paul and you were back in LA. And so we dated long distance. And what was the app called? Priceline? You can name your price for an airline ticket and see if an airline took it. We are so aging ourselves.

We actually had dial-up internet too. And we didn't have cell phones, by the way. We didn't have cell phones. And so what I did is, it seemed like couple of weeks, every two or three weeks, we were able to see each other, but we made an effort to, um, you come out to St. Paul or I would go out to LA and, uh, we made a serious effort to make that happen. And, um, just a side story, like after this, I love you, you know, breakfast, uh, I went out to see Rachel. And so at that point she's like, I'm committed. Um, this is, this is real. And so I'm going to help you out.

You don't look very good. So she, I'm going to give you a makeover, which I'm like, uh, that's fine. I don't know. Whatever. Um, I mean, we got you new glasses, remember? So we got new glasses, which looked way better than my old ones. But then she said, you need a new haircut. And so she pulled up, she pulled up to this random look like a nice salon we go in it was in venice beach and i didn't i don't even know what that is but we okay well i'm gonna go to venice beach and um she sits me down in the chair and the stylist comes up and he's she tells him what she wants but the guy was like high on um cocaine or coke cocaine he was definitely he kept like like sniffing his nose he looked really agitated and i was like what's going on what's

going on and then he didn't do anything that i told him to do with your hair he basically shaved sean's so in essence i shaved my head that was a style that she knew glasses and a shaved head is what I got from Rachel that is such an LA story I can't even tell you I'm like this is what do you do you get so mad at me do you love me or hate me you're sure you got my head shaved that was terrible you were so mad you remember how mad you were I was very I was I was very angry but you know we did we dated for you know a little about a year and a half and um you crazy. And, you know, we- I went to India. Do you remember? I went to India over the summer, I think. Yep, and then you came-

And then we stayed in touch. And then you flew me out because Sean was putting his way through law school by doing lumberjack exhibitions. And he had, when I returned from India for my summer trip to India with my girlfriend, Sean was at the Calgary Stampede in Canada. The greatest outdoor show on earth, the Calgary Stampede. And so I flew Rachel up for the Calgary

Stampede. We threw some cowboy hats on from India. And we had probably five days there. I had a lot of fun. I think we were line dancing and trying to two-step, which again, I'm not a good dancer. So Rachel didn't know how to two-step either. That was such a fun time. That was awesome. We had a ball, but listen, we fell in love and we're able to make our relationship work. And I think a lot of people do that today on these dating apps. We had a built-in dating app, which was the real world and road rules. You're right. MTV was like a dating app. That's such a good analogy. By the way, I am totally for dating apps. I think there are more

marriages, Sean, through dating apps now than through regular normal ways of meeting people at a bar or through your job or whatever. I'm totally for it. And when I meet young people and they say, oh, should I be on a date? How do I meet? So should I be on a dating app? I'm like, I'm like, no shame in that. Get on the dating app,

but use one that, you know, actually tries to find a good match. And I believe, as you know, Sean, I believe that opposites do not attract that you should actually try to find somebody who has the most in common with you. Well, listen, we like to have coffee together. I don't like old movies or foreign films. Beyond that, we kind of are just totally on the same page on most everything and enjoy doing so many things together.

We're very similar in a lot of ways. We're both Catholic. We both come from big family oriented families. We like chick flicks. You more than me. Let's be honest. Can I tell everybody, can I tell everybody what your favorite movie is?

I don't know. What is it? Oh, you know what your favorite movie is. It's Dirty Dancing. You know it. Listen, I got,

I have a lot of favorites, but Dirty Dancing was a classic. It was a classic 1980s. I know, but it's just not what people would imagine would be your favorite. Listen, no. I mean, come on. Listen, I like Braveheart. There's a lot of Gladiator.

Let's just say Sean Leguero. I like Wedding Crashers. Listen, there's a lot of guy movies I like, but I like a lot of chick flicks, which makes me a very easy date. You are easy that way. But can I make one last, so we ended up in Wisconsin,

and so Rachel was up for The View. But wait a minute, we dated for a year and a half before we got married. Yep, a year and a half. And so she's up for The View, we're going to get married. From the day we met, from the day we met, we got married a year and a half later. And so literally a year after a half. And so she's up for the view. We're going to get married. From the day we met, from the day we met, we got married a year and a half later.

And so literally a year after. Yeah. So it's down to, it's down to three finalists or two finalists or three finalists. And we kind of make a deal and I say, okay, if, if you get the view with Barbara Walters at the time, I'll move with you to New York. But if you don't get the view, you have to move back to Wisconsin with me to the small town of New York, Wisconsin. That's not what happened. I actually made the deal. I said, hey, Sean, I'm up for the job on the view.

This is when you were going to get married. And I said, if I get the view, you move to New York. But if I don't get the view, I'll move to your little town of here, Wisconsin. Now, when I made that deal, I thought I was going to win it. I thought I was going to get the view. I'll move to your little town of here, Wisconsin. Now, when I made that deal, I thought I was going to win it. I thought I was going to get the job on. I was like sort of like the favorite to get the job on the view. It was between me and Lisa Ling. Actually, it was way, way, way back then in like 90, what, 98, 90. Yeah. No, 99. Yeah. 99 yeah 99 yeah and so it's between her and i and i thought i was gonna get it

and then barbara walters called me to tell me i didn't get it which i was in shock and i kept my promise and i moved to hayward wisconsin population 2000 home of the world record muskie and the big fish The big muskie Yeah, the big fish museum Half a city block long and two stories high National Freshwater Fishing Hall of Fame Home of the Berkey, the Lumberjack World Championships And a lot of great inland lakes And the Duffy family

So Rachel moves I get a job as a prosecutor in Ashland We move to Ashland, we're there for 10 years We run for Congress And we then go to Wausau, Wisconsin for, what, eight years, nine years. And then, you know, the rest is history. But I think it's interesting that we're the first reality TV couple that got married. And our daughter, Evita. Yeah, in America. In America. We're the first, the longest married, and the most fertile.

We are the most fertile. And Evita is the first reality TV daughter. So those are our claims to fame. And that's how we met on reality TV. And it's kind of an odd story, but we love our story of how we met. And again, if it wasn't for reality TV, a network that doesn't probably fit our political values and a show that probably doesn't fit our values today, but we were part of it as, you know, young people we're both grateful for because it brought us together and we never would have met, but for this show, I mean, you're a, you know,

a Hispanic Arizonan and I'm some lumberjack from Northern Wisconsin. Our paths would have never crossed, but for that show and we found love and family and a life together, which has, show and we found love and family and a life together, which has been fantastic. And you always say to women, you give them advice on relationships. And as we're about to go, tell us what your advice is to women and relationships and careers and families. So first of all, so anybody who says that you can't find true love on a reality TV show, that's a lie. That's a lie. You can, I believe that you can find true love on a reality show. And I believe you can find true love on a dating app. And I believe in true love. And I think my advice to young women, um, because

there's a lot of pressure on young women these days to, you know, get a career and get it established before you get married and have kids and so forth. And, you know, that's sort of the advice given to women from people like Sheryl Sandberg. You know, she always says she's the one who wrote the famous book, Lean In, and says you should lean into your career. You should put she told girls they should put their foot on the gas pedal of their career and don't let go. Keep going, keep going, keep going. And that's not at all the advice I would give. Now, that may work for some people, but my advice is very, well, let's just say it's not the feminist advice. I say if you meet a guy and he is handsome and you're attracted to him and he's wonderful and he's nice and he's kind and he's strong and he'll protect you. Then I say, whatever you're doing, the most important

thing you could do is snatch up that guy, marry him and all the other stuff will work itself out. And that's kind of the theory I had. And I would say it worked out exactly that way for me. I knew that if I married someone really great, that the most important thing in my life, my love life and my family would be right. And that all the other things that are secondary, you know, professional pursuits, et cetera, would work themselves out because a good man would, would, would allow for that to happen and help me in that, in those pursuits, et cetera, would work themselves out because a good man would allow for that to happen and help me in those pursuits. And that's what happened. And we've kind of helped each other. I helped you when you wanted to run for Congress. And you were wonderful enough when

I got the job at Fox, the weekend job. You said, all right, we're leaving Wisconsin. I know you love Wisconsin. It was hard for you to leave, but you did it. We'll have more of this conversation after this. As the world's population grows, so does the need for resources like Potash to support sustainable food production. This is why BHP is building one of the world's most sustainable Potash mines in Canada. Essential resources responsibly produced. This is what BHP has committed to Canada. The future is clear. It's happening now at BHP, a future resources company. To discover how, visit bhp.com slash better future. Spent my whole life there. And I think what's interesting, you know, too, is you did, I mean, you had this budding career. You were just on ABC's The View. You almost got it. You could have, you know, stayed in LA and stayed in New York and tried to, you know,

pursue this career, but you followed love and you actually helped me with my career. And at that time, as the internet's coming online, you're able to do some things. You can be able to write in articles. You're able to do a book. You're able to do some work from rural Wisconsin, but you're able to keep yourself alive and advance your family. And then you had this amazing, you know, kind of midlife transition to go, I can start to work at Fox. I can, you know, I can build a career. It's not too late.

And I would argue you've kind of had the best of both worlds. You've been able to, again, have a family, have a husband, and then also have a career that you love and a platform that you thoroughly enjoy, which is pretty cool. And again, had you said, no, I want the career first, you might not have got the second part, the love and the family. But you got the love and the family, and then you worked on the career as well, and you kind of got it all. And I think that's a powerful message. I think what makes life fulfilling, what makes a country great are people who pursue love and family and their careers fall in line. And I think, you know, when you supported me as I was, again, a DA and I ran for Congress. Then the flip side, I left Congress and I've been supportive of you as you pursued you pursued your, your, your career in TV. And it's kind of worked out really well for both of us, um, and for our families. So, um, yeah, no, it really has, but I can tell you that if I had to lose one thing, right. If I had to lose the, a family, a happy, you know, a family, kids, a happy marriage, or my career, I'd lose my career in an instant.

So I just think it's about prioritizing. And for me personally, I don't know, again, I don't know if it's because I faced mortality at such a young age with that car, you know, very traumatic car accident. But I feel like I, through the grace of God and through those experiences, um, at a very young age was able to prioritize, um, what, what was most important. And, and maybe I made those, some of those choices unconsciously, and they've just turned out to be the right priority. Um, but I wouldn't change anything for a minute. And like I said, if I, you know, my career, um, and as much as I love Fox and by the way, Fox is like the greatest company to work for as a mom, like there has been unlimited support for me, like beyond my wildest dreams that I don't know

of any other network that would take a mom with nine kids. They probably would think I was, you know, not well at some other network because I have nine kids. I do remember, do you remember how Barbara Walters would react every time I would, I mean, I'd come back and do the show. I've probably done the view 25 times. Every time I would go back while Barbara was there, I mean, I'd have another kid and she would look at me like I was insane. Like I was absolutely insane. That said, I love Fox, but Fox is not going to hold my hand, you know, at the end of my life when I'm in my deathbed. And my career is not going to love me.

My kids are. You are. My grandkids are. And so I just think that I think it's about really prioritizing and investing in the things that last. And careers are wonderful. And I love the impact that you and I, you know, can have commenting on politics. And certainly things are not going well in our country, Sean. politics and certainly things are not going well in our country, Sean. And I think it's like for somebody who's feisty like me to have a platform to vent on like Fox has been probably saved me

from going to the insane asylum. So I love that part about my life, but it is not what's going to fulfill me in the end. I know that. And just, I think when you talk about the Fox component, you've had a couple of kids while you were a contributor at Fox and the fact that they were like, okay, you're going to get some clothes. Let's try to get you some pregnancy clothes or maternity clothes and take time off if you have a baby. You're talking about the last time that I got, so I've had to- It's been wonderful to you as'll go to my boss. I just want to explain what you're talking about, that when I would go to my bosses and say, hey, I just want to let you know I'm pregnant, no one ever said anything negative. They were always excited. And the first thing out of the executive's mouth was, okay, so I guess we got to get you pregnancy wardrobe now. Not a problem. That's such a blessing as a mom, Sean. Like not a problem. Like that's such a blessing as a mom, Sean. And as wonderful as that is, and it is wonderful to have a network like this that's so supportive of families and moms and motherhood, and you can build a family at a place like this.

Again, you can't exclude your personal life for a career. And I think you can have it all. You can try to get it all. But if you put a priority on career over love and relationships, I think you wake up a little bit older in life and you're like, I think I'm missing something. There's something missing in your heart and your soul. Because as humans, we're meant to find love and a partner and we're meant to have families. And it's a good thing. It's a positive thing, and again, I think a lot of people are making decisions about the careers and money as opposed to love and family, and again, I think there's a lie that's

been told that you can't have them both, and I think you really can. It takes some focus. It takes some attention, but you can do it. Not at same time. Like you may not be able to have it all at the same time. I mean, I was an at home mom for 14 years. And Sean, you've had to take a backseat. I mean, you'd be on your way to be the governor of Wisconsin right now if you had could have it all right. I mean, you decided then to help me in my opportunity after I helped you in yours. And so, I mean, there's, there is sacrifice and it's not like you can have it all. You just can't have it all at once. And there's going to be setbacks and there's going to be drawbacks. But I also think Sean, there's a lot of ideology that plays into it. There is a feminist agenda. There is an anti-natal mindset in America and we see it. You and I have done shows on the birth rates that are just plummeting in America right now and among young people.

of so many families. And then there's been just a lot less family formation because of so many reasons. But part of it is feminism. That is, I think, as you said, lied to women and told them that their careers would be, you know, more fulfilling than having a family and also and being married. And also that there was some sort of obligation that we had as women to this, you know, sisterhood, which is a bunch of bulls**t as well. You had as women to this, you know, sisterhood, um, which is a bunch of bullshit as well. Um, you have the obligation to yourself, to your family, um, and, and to your spiritual fulfillment. And I just don't think that a career is, is going to do that for men or women, Sean. I mean, you know, lots of men who at the end of their life have, they regret that they were too career focused. Yeah. And I look at this too and I'm like, you know, there's an idea that by getting married,

again, you lose all these opportunities. And in our marriage, I never felt that you would ever put your career over me and our family. And I don't think you felt that I'd ever put my career over you and the family. And so we've made choices, sacrificing careers and opportunities for our family and things have come back around and we've stayed active and they will continue to come back around. But I never felt threatened by your career that you would leave me for your career or I will leave you for my career. Where would I go with my kids, Sean? Who would take me? Can I tell you what this, listen, we were like, what do I want to do this podcast on? We were talking before we did it.

And there's a number of topics of politics that are happening. And we were like, let's talk about how we met. We'll do like a 15 minute podcast. And I think we're like 45 minutes into this podcast on love and marriage and how we met. We don't have much to say about how we met. It's going to be 15 minutes. I know. So this is what our kitchen,

we like sit down and have a cup of coffee and like an hour and a half later, two hours later, we're like, oh my gosh, we got to get our day going because we've sat here for two hours and chatted. It's just like when we went to the Uptowner, honey. It is just like the Uptowner. We just keep talking. And so I want to thank you all for joining us and hearing our love story that love can work at the Uptowner

and off reality TV. And you can be embarrassed by the things you put on social media or on reality TV, but just know that your kids will watch them one day and kind of think about that and what you say and what you do because the stuff never goes away. They're going to see it. Don't embarrass yourself. And I've got some embarrassing stuff. So do you. And your kids will question you and ask you about it. So think about that when you put something on TikTok or Instagram. Well, anyway, well, if you haven't seen the Instagram video, you can go to it. I'm sorry, the video um that has gone viral and it's called um what is our tiktok handle sean we just got that i don't i we just sean and rachel duffy i don't

know check it out i don't know what our tiktok handle handle is god we have a couple videos we've got we've got some great instagram uh we've been up at the cabin um and we've got some great instagram of of kids surfing behind the boat and tubing and whatnot, just kind of our summer enjoying family. Rachel took last weekend off Fox and Friends. And so we have these little moments that we carve away for ourselves. That was last week's podcast on enjoying the last moments of summer. And we're totally doing that. We're trying to make sure we suck every ounce of summer. It's like a grapefruit was squeezing the last drop out of the summer because we hate when summer goes.

We love the summer so much. We love summer. So listen, thanks for joining us on our podcast. If you like us, you can rate, review, subscribe to our podcast. And again, we enjoy sitting around our kitchen table and sharing our conversation with all of you as we chat about the important things in life like love and marriage.

It's been great joining you, Rachel. That's right. All right. You guys have a good one. I love you, Sean. Thanks for joining us. Bye, everybody. Bye-bye.

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