Get Sleepy: Sleep meditation and stories - Bonus Compilation: The Adventures Of Auggie The Cat

Episode Date: November 22, 2025

Narrator: Simon Mattacks 🇬🇧Writer: Alicia Steffann ✍️ Welcome back, sleepyheads. Tonight, we have a special bonus episode, where we'll enjoy all five episodes (so far) from our popular series about Auggie, a fluffy, mischievous cat who lives alongside her family of humans. 😴 Connect Stay up to date on all our news and even vote on upcoming episodes! Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠getsleepy.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠facebook.com/getsleepypod/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠instagram.com/getsleepypod/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Twitter: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠twitter.com/getsleepypod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Our Apps Redeem exclusive unlimited access to Premium content for 1 month FREE in our mobile apps built by the Get Sleepy and Slumber Studios team: Deep Sleep Sounds: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠deepsleepsounds.com/getsleepy/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Slumber: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠slumber.fm/getsleepy/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ FAQs Have a query for us or need help with something? You might find your answer here:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Get Sleepy FAQs⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ About Get Sleepy Get Sleepy is the #1 story-telling podcast designed to help you get a great night’s rest. By combining sleep meditations with a relaxing bedtime story, each episode will guide you gently towards sleep. Get Sleepy Premium Get instant access to ad-free episodes and Thursday night bonus episodes by subscribing to our premium feed. It's easy! Sign up in two taps! Get Sleepy Premium feed includes: Monday and Wednesday night episodes (with zero ads). An exclusive Thursday night bonus episode. Access to the entire back catalog (also ad-free). Extra-long episodes. Exclusive sleep meditation episodes. Discounts on merchandise. We’ll love you forever. Get your 7-day free trial: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠getsleepy.com/support⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Thank you so much for listening! Feedback? Let us know your thoughts! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠getsleepy.com/contact-us/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Get Sleepy is a production of Slumber Studios. Check out our podcasts, apps, and more at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠slumberstudios.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. That’s all for now. Sweet dreams ❤️ 😴 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Get Sleepy is a production of Slumber Studios and is made possible thanks to the generous support of our sponsors and premium members. If you'd like to listen ad-free and access weekly bonus episodes, extra long stories and our entire back catalogue, you can try out premium free for seven days by following the link in the episode notes. Now, a quick word from our sponsors. If you enjoy Get Sleepy or any of the other shows we produce here at Slumber Studios, you'll love our app called White Noise Deep Sleep Sounds, with hundreds of sounds to choose from and even the option of mixing them together to create your perfect soundscape.

It can help you fall asleep fast, wake up less often, improve focus, reduce anxiety, relieve tinnitus, and calm, babies. As a listener of Get Sleepy, we have an exclusive offer for you. Download the White Noise Deep Sleep Sounds app and get 30 days free access to all of the premium content. Just go to deepsleepsounds.com slash get sleepy. That's deepsleepsounds.com slash get sleepy or follow the link in the episode description. In case you didn't know, our company's Slumber Studios also has a sleep app called Slumber. With well over a thousand episodes, it has every type of sleep-inducing content you could possibly want, from stories, meditations,

audio books and history to soundscapes and music. New episodes are added each week, and you can even search by narrator and listen exclusively to episodes narrated by me or by any of my wonderful fellow storytellers. Slumber has other unique features too, like the ability to add and adjust background sounds to create your own perfect mix. So I highly recommend you give Slumber a try. It's available in the Apple App Store and on Google Play. And as a Get Sleepy listener, you can unlock all of the content in the app free for one month.

just go to slumber.fm slash get sleepy to get instant access to all of the content in slumber free for one month. That's slumber.fm slash get sleepy. Welcome to get sleepy, where we listen, we relax and we get sleepy. My name's Thomas and I'm your host. We have a really special treat for you all tonight. One of our most popular series on Get Sleepy is that which follows the life and adventures of Orgy, a fluffy, mischievous cat who lives alongside her family of humans. In this episode, we've stitched together all four.

five of Orgy's stories up to this point, so that you can enjoy them for hours on end should you wish, as you sleep and dream through the night. They are all written by Alicia Stefan and read by Simon. We'll be kicking off with the first time we met our feline friend, an episode called Orgy's Nighttime Adventures. So make yourself comfortable, get nice and cosy under the covers, and give yourself permission to relax fully and completely. Closing your eyes, picture a starry night of warm, fragrant breezes. The moon is glowing in the sky, promising a beautiful evening ahead.

This is where our story begins. Orgy squeezed herself through her cat door and emerged onto the back deck. Lifting her nose, she delicately sniffed the evening breeze. The air was balmy and pleasant, just warm enough to tell her that a new season had arrived. It was that perfect moment between the chill of late spring and the unrelenting heat of high summer. She was in her element. Circling the small deck with the confident strut of a lion, she took stock of the neighbouring gardens.

The human neighbours on either side had dogs who lived with them. of those pooches was an enormous, goofy Labrador. The other was an over-excited small poodle. Both of these canines gave her their full attention, whenever her outdoor excursions coincided with theirs. Gazing up at her, wagging their hindquarters eagerly, they would whine softly and move their feet with agitation. Orgy always made a point of ostentatiously paying them no mind. Leaping up onto the railing, she would walk the full length of the porch area, behaving as if her neighbour pets were too boring for words.

She enjoyed demonstrating that she was not interested in talking to them. Once in a while, she would saunter over to the edge of the deck that was nearest to the dog in question and sit, staring at it square in the face. This always drove either one of the dogs mad with excitement. But Augie didn't flinch. She was above such undignified behavior. Tonight, no.

No dogs were visible. She took her time sniffing the flower parts, inhaling the scent of the fresh basil, the rosemary, and the parsley that grew inside them. The lady human spent such a lot of time fussing over these plants. They smelled interesting and were very mysterious. Orgy nibbled experimentally on the parsley, and then worked her jaw, unsure of whether or not she really liked it. Hopping up on the railing, she paused, with her head tilted back and enjoyed the moment. A sweet, strong breeze blew her long, silky fur back from her face,

activating her enormous white whiskers. She relished the feeling of the outdoors as the light wind rippled smoothly from her proud head to the end of her fluffy black and white tail. She switched that tail up onto the railing and wrapped it neatly around her little white paws. Like ankle socks, they clearly marked the bottom of her satiny black front legs. Twilight had fallen, illuminating the solar lamps that were installed at regular intervals along the railing.

Orgy stood and walked over a couple of them, stopping when she reached the flower boxes. The humans had recently installed these rectangular planters and filled them with petunias. The pink and white flowers spilled exuberantly out of the boxes, hanging over the rail of the deck for all to admire. Orgy sniffed them and briefly enjoyed their perfumed scent. but her enjoyment was replaced by annoyance. These flower boxes now blocked her railing runway, which she had formally strutted, end to end, without obstacles. Testing the soil under some of the petunias with her paw,

she considered tromping over them. Then she shook the black dirt impatiently, off her pristine white sock. No, it wouldn't do. This idea was too messy. Instead, she turned and faced the artfully landscaped back garden and scanned it with an expert eye. The fact that there weren't any barking dogs

meant that some of the more timid animals might appear. It was just the time of evening when they tended to emerge. She sat completely immobile, with only her nose twitching, and her handsome bib of white chest fur ruffling in the wind. Then she saw it. A rabbit hopped right into the middle of the yard, and sat still in the light from the round. moon. Sniffing here and there, it meandered left and right. Then it turned and appeared

to stare at her, sitting up slightly. Augie froze and her eyes narrowed. Viewed from the front, she was like a statue. From behind, any human might have observed, that she was like one of those cat clocks with a swinging pendulum tail. Tick, tick, tick, it went, moving tersely back and forth. As far up on the deck as she was, she would not be able to chase this rabbit. However, she could imagine doing it. After a time, the rabbit, the rabbit. habit turned away and hopped out of the beam of moonlight, disappearing into the recesses of the

garden. Oggy relaxed and began to wash her face with her paw. Having completed her nightly rounds on the deck, Augie realized her tummy was rumbling. Squeezing back through the cat door, she could see that her bowl was completely empty. She sat down next to the bowl and stared at the humans, who were enjoying their customary TV show nearby on the couch. For the most part, they ignored her. However, once in a while, one of them would catch her eye and she would stare them down, hopeful that the guilt

would spur them to action. When the staring didn't work, she sauntered over and stretched out on the ottoman in front of them, making herself very long and showing her fluffy belly. One of the child humans reached out and petted her, but no food was delivered,

and the TV show continued. Oggy returned to the bowl to watch. wait. Finally, she could tell they were doing the bedtime things. The small humans headed upstairs first, and the parents began opening and closing the dishwasher and filling cups of water. Before turning off the kitchen light, the man measured out her dry kibble and piled it in the bowl.

She ate half of it immediately. making crunching noises as they left the kitchen. Feeling full again, she turned to her water-bubbler and lapped the fresh stream of water from the fountain, spraying little droplets on her nose. The stream of water splashed irregularly into its receptacle around her face, making a pleasant pattering sound.

When she had quenched her thirst, she licked the stray droplets of her fur with a swipe of her little pink tongue. The sounds of bedtime preparations emanated from the upper floor of the house. A TV droned on quietly in the big bedroom where the grown-ups slapped. Meanwhile, the small humans seemed to be completed. their nightly ritual at the bathroom sink. Water was running, and toothbrushes clattered lightly in cups. She padded across the family room and silently climbed the soft, carpeted stairs to the upper level, arriving in time to see boys disappearing into bedrooms and feet going up bunk bed ladders.

Within moments, hallway lights were off, doors were closed, and the big humans had retreated to the room with the TV. Oggie sat in the silent hallway, feeling the household shift from daytime to night time. She was in charge now. Tripping lightly down the stairs, she sashayed over to the forbidden kitchen counter and hopped up. Threading her way between the fruit basket and the salt and pepper shakers, she traversed the length of the breakfast bar, boldly going where she knew she was not allowed to go. She sat herself down in front of the forcet at the kitchen sink. It was dripping ever so slightly.

A fat droplet clung to the spout, gathering heft almost imperceptibly. The droplet was being gradually pulled downward, downward, downward. Ogie watched it, immobile, waiting for it to lose its fight with gravity. Then, unable to resist any longer, she licked it away. She did not have the patience to wait for another drop. One was enough. Returning to her starting point on the counter, she spotted a pencil. She pushed it just a bit, and then a lot, and it fell to the floor with a satisfying tapping noise.

She sat squarely in the middle of a pile of paperwork, stacked next to the pencil, surveying the room. It just felt right to be there. After enjoying her rectangular paper seat for a while, she gave up the counter and headed for the Lady Human's desk. A laptop stood open, glowing dimly in the darkness. Oggy hopped up on the desk, which was covered with lumpy items. Stacks of paper tilted and. slid irregularly over half the surface area.

Multiple pens and binder clips lay about. An empty coffee cup stood in the corner near a roll of lip balm. Drawn by the warmth coming off the keyboard, Ogie squeezed her enormous body onto the laptop and lay down. It hummed. almost imperceptibly beneath her, like an electric blanket. The computer was too small to really be comfortable, though. Stretching herself out, experimentally, she swatted at the lip balm, sending it to the floor.

A random paper fluttered off the other side of the desk, pushed over the edge by her hind legs. Unable to get as cosy as she wanted to be, she abandoned the desk, leaping back to the floor and walking past the lip balm as if it was of no interest to her. She crossed the moonbeam that lit up the fancy rug in the living room and hopped up into the open front window. From this vantage point, she could see the quiet street. Most houses were dark, with only a window illuminated here and there. Streetlights cast pools of golden light down onto the sidewalk and the road.

A little bit of pollen drifted slowly through the glow, showing just how many of the plants. outside were getting ready for summer. As Orgy watched the road, a lone pedestrian strolled by, taking her dog on a night-time outing. Without speaking, the woman made her way up the street, allowing the dog to examine mailboxes and holes in shrubberies along the way. A car drove by slowly, its headlights sweeping the scene. Then it was gone, and the woman and her dog had disappeared.

Ogie's nose twitched as the scent of blossoms blew past. Then, stretching herself upward, she lodged her claws briefly in the very top of the screen and removed them again. There was no human here to scold her. She settled down in the window and rested there for some time, enjoying the early summer night sounds of the crickets and the occasional far-off passing of a car. Her whiskers and her nose were alert to every motion of the air around her.

Her senses were awake, even though she might have appeared to be dozing. Eventually, she grew bored in the window and returned to the velvety carpet on the floor. Stalking through the living room, she spied one of the human lady's bobby pins, lying near the catbed. Augie had many soft cat toys and rattling balls, but nothing entertained her as much as a bobby pin. She pounced on it, seizing the skinny little hairpin between her silky white paws. The pin flipped in the air and landed a short distance away. She stealthily circled it and descended upon it again,

smacking it across the nearby hardwood floor. The pin skidded lightly across the planks and spun once again to rest. The sport went on like this. Sometimes she purposely shoved the pin under the edge. of the rug, just to create an extra challenge. Once, she backed up and sat upon it, as if catching it off guard. It was a marvellous game, and she felt quite invigorated afterwards. When she had finally lost interest in the bobby pin, Orgy decided it was time to check on the people. She hippity hopped up the stairs, still energized by her game.

The upstairs hallway was completely silent. All the humans were fast asleep. A sliver of light shone through the crack in the bathroom door. Padding softly into the room where the big humans were snoozing, she jumped up on the king-sized bed, landing on the comforter, right between their two sleeping forms. She turned her attention to their feet, waiting for something to move under the covers, but everyone was still. Making a soft, purring sound, she walked up to the man's face and put her nose close to him. If he happened to wake, she thought, perhaps he would

pet her. Alas, the man only rubbed his nose in his sleep and turned away from her. Oggy was slightly put out by the lack of company, but she decided it was a good opportunity to take a nice cat bath. She started with her paws, then moved on to her ears, and with all the very long fur she had to cover, the bath took quite a long time. By the time she got to the end of her majestic, poofy tail, she was ready to rest for a little while. She turned around three times and settled herself near the pillow between the lady and the man.

All this time, they had not woken up. Listening to their regular breathing, she drifted into a nap and dreamed about chasing rabbits. As the night-time hours ticked by, Oggy was awakened by another car driving by in the street. Standing on the bed, she arched her back and stretched luxuriously, working the kinks out of her legs. Then, walking to the bottom of the bed,

she stepped onto the wooden storage chest that sat there, launching herself onto the top of the nearby clothes hamper. The woven basket wobbled unsteadily under her weight. It was a little bit small for her to use as a perch, but she liked sitting there sometimes anyway. This time, unable to settle herself comfortably, she sprang back onto the floor. The force of her feet pushed the hamper in the opposite direction,

and it tumbled over with a dull thud. Augie jumped a few feet away from it and observed the fallen basket placidly. It lay horizontal on the floor now. The people seemed to sense deep in their dreams that something had happened. The lady turned over and resettled herself, and the man shifted his position. However, they did not wake up.

Unconcerned about the mess she had made of the clothes hamper, Ogie turned and strolled into the bathroom. The moonlight streamed in the window, lighting up the black and white tile. Winding up her strength, she sprang into the clawfoot tub. It was a delightful container, smooth and comforting, and not too big. Sitting down in the middle of it, she peered over the top edge, scrutinizing the bathroom. In the morning, it was usually busy in. here. Right now, though, it was silent. No forcets dripped, and there was nothing to play with.

She sat in the tub for what she considered to be an acceptable period of time, and then she jumped back out again and stalked out of the bathroom. After her long nap on the bed, Oogie was feeling well-rested. The upstairs was no longer entertaining. Padding back down the stairway to the main level, she went and plopped down in the middle of the living room. She was bored.

Sitting in the moonbeams on the living room, rug, she meowed indignantly several times. Then she waited and listened. The humans did not respond. Giving up on her noisy protest, she returned to her food bowl to eat the rest of her dinner. She wanted that bowl to be completely empty. when the people got up in the morning.

Otherwise, there was no guarantee they would refill it. When the food was all gone, Ogie positioned herself in the window-sill that overlooked the back garden. The sky was beginning to lighten just a little bit, although the moon still shone optimistically. The streets were quiet. As she watched, a grey squirrel came darting across the wooden rail of the deck,

where she had been sitting a few hours ago. It stopped at the newly planted flower boxes, removed a large nut from its mouth, and began industriously burying the nut under the petunias. Oggy's eyes widened like saucers. and she adjusted her stance in the window-sill, switching her tail. She was on high alert. The squirrel made quick work of burying its treasure

and sat up on its haunches, peeking left and right. Then, as quickly as it had appeared, it was gone, leaping into a nearby tree. Oggy tracked its motions as it vanished into the branches, shaking them as it went. Some late blooms from the tree fluttered slowly to the ground. Oggy relaxed into the window sill again once the small intruder had left. She put her nose against the rough weave of the screen, sniffing the perfume of the early morning breezes.

It was going to be another beautiful day. When she had been resting there for a while, a movement caught her attention down in the garden. Following the shadow with her gaze, she realized the rabbit was back. The same cheeky creature was slowly meandering about on the lawn, as if it owned the place. Horgie quickly hopped from the window

and ran down the stairs to the glass sliding door in the basement. Sitting in front of it, she had a close-up view of the movements of the bold little rabbit. To her surprise, the bunny turned toward the house and hopped right up to the glass door.

It could clearly see her, sitting right there, that it sniffed around the patio as if it hadn't a care in the world. Unconcerned about the massive feline staring it down from inside the glass, the rabbit canvassed the patio freely. Then, apparently done with its adventure, it turned and made a sprightly exit. disappearing through a hole under the fence. Oggy was indignant. She would do a better job of staring down that rabbit next time she was out on the deck. As she turned and prepared to go back upstairs,

she heard the coffee pot turn on. One of the adult humans was finally up. She bounded into the kitchen and sat by her empty bowl expectantly. The man shuffled back and forth, opening drawers and cupboards. He fetched a mug and turned on the television news. Then, with maddening slowness, he returned to the counter and got the cat food out of the pantry. He deposited a nice, fresh supply of kibble in her bowl. Oggy gave her full attention to her breakfast

as the man slowly shuffled back upstairs with his coffee. Having filled her belly, she realized she was getting rather tired. It had, after all, been a busy night. Stretching herself thoroughly, she hopped up onto the family room couch and settled herself on the blanket that lay there in a pile from the night before. It was her favourite one, woven of soft material that made her feel very drowsy. Curling up into a nice round ball, she laid her fluffy warm tail over her pink nose and closed her eyes.

Then, with a satisfied tummy and the comforting smell of coffee wafting through the air, Augie began her first proper catnap of the new day. As the skies As the skies outside gradually brightened, Orgy could see that the world had changed overnight. overnight. Where the hillside had been brown, where the patio and the walk had been grey, and where the trees had been green, everything was now white. But it was not just the colour of the landscape that had altered. Wherever there had been a chair, a pot or a table,

there was now a shapeless mound of snow. These mysterious piles were the only hint of what actually lay beneath. There was something else odd about the view. There were no cars driving around. Similarly, inscrutable mounds of snow bordered the road she was always watching from the upstairs bedroom window. the usual early morning headlights were absent no engines coughed to life declaring that their owners were heading out into the world no vehicles purred their sleepy way toward the highway it was as if even the traffic slumbered Orgy's reverie was interrupted by the buzzing of the human lady's phone, which lay on the bedside table.

This was most unusual. The phone didn't usually make noises while the humans were sleeping. Orgy watched the impertinent little device, her eyes wide-like saucers, as it danced merrily, rumbling, boistered. Pulled from the depths of a dream, the lady rolled over in bed and clumsily grabbed the phone in her hand, squinting at it. She poked at it with her finger a few times and then quickly put the device to her ear saying, Hello? She said this like a question, as if she wasn't sure she should even be acknowledging the phone at all. sitting up in bed she appeared to listen intently rubbing her eyes then without putting the phone down

she peered out the window turning to gently shake the man next to her she loudly whispered it's a snow day school is cancelled of course this meant nothing to augy who responded only to her name or words such as kibble or dinner time. The human man groaned and put his pillow over his head. Orgy wasn't sure if it was because he didn't want to wake up or because the lady had said something disagreeable. Then he muttered, I'll get the coffee. He sat up slowly,

putting his feet on the floor where he pushed them into his slippers. Augie did not understand why this was happening sooner than usual, but it was a clear opportunity to wangle herself some early breakfast. Why wait for 7.30, and the human was getting the coffee now? After all, since she was going downstairs anyway, filling her bowl was the polite thing to do. Dropping her substantial girth to the floor, she trotted past his shuffling feet,

importantly preceding him down the staircase to the main level. He seemed briefly annoyed when she ran between his legs, but that made no difference to her. The important thing was to demonstrate to her, him how ready she was to receive the morning ration of kibble. She was quite sure he would be moved by her enthusiasm. Sitting regally by her bowl, she watched as the man slowly pulled two mugs from the cupboard and filled them with steaming coffee.

Turning in her direction, with a cup in each hand, his eyes met her. hers. She gave him her most intense stare as he gazed upon her rather stupidly. Then, rolling his eyes with exasperation, he set the cups down and walked over to the cupboard, murmuring gibberish to himself. Augie meowed at him to hurry up as her tummy was quite empty. Then, after impatiently watching him level and pour the food out of the scoop, she dug into the food with verve. She was so involved in her breakfast that she was only vaguely aware of the man retrieving his mugs and creaking his way back up the stairs to the bedroom.

Orgy finished almost all of her food, but she left five pieces of kibble. for later. Having taken a long drink at her water bowl, she hopped up on the family room couch and proceeded to give herself a lovely bath. This was naturally what one should do between having breakfast and settling down for a morning nap. It took some time because she had such a large, fine belly to take care of. Dimly aware of the murmur of the television upstairs, she left the couch, freshly bathed,

and sat in front of the door to the outside deck. It was light out there now. Even the winter morning sun seemed brighter than usual, with the snow reflecting it back. Her attention was briefly riveted on a brilliant red cardinal that landed on the icy railing. The little bird tilted its head to one side and then the other, hopping a short distance, as if deciding something. Appearing to notice the furry beast inside the door, it froze and stared her boldly down. down. Then, as suddenly as it had appeared, it fluttered away, a blur of scarlet feathers

disappearing into the blue sky. A gust of wind blew and fat blobs of snow fell heavily from the branches of the evergreens outside. A shower of sparkling sugar flew dizzily past the window pane, making a false snowstorm in just that spot. Orgy tried to follow the flakes with her eyes, but it became too confusing to keep up with the glittering cyclone they created. Just then, the upstairs became much noisier. The small humans were awake, and they were exclaiming something. in a way that made Oggy put her ears back.

Slinking somewhat hesitantly up the carpeted stairs, she peeked into one of the bedrooms. The girl child was jumping on her bed in her footy pyjamas while the boy vibrated with excitement at the window. The lady appeared at the bedroom door next to Augie to admonish them for being so loud, and they reluctantly calmed themselves. But then she left, without helping them get dressed in their daytime clothes. What was going on? Augie wondered.

Wouldn't these noisemakers be leaving for the yellow bus soon? Alas, the events of the next half hour showed Orgy that they would not. Blankets and stuffed animals were pulled from their beds and they proceeded down the stairs as Augie watched from a quieter spot further down the hallway. The children seemed to be relocating all their favourite things to the family room for some reason. It was most puzzling.

Within moments, the TV downstairs had been activated and Augie could hear the unmistakable sounds of the show that always appeared for the small humans. The grown-ups had also relocated to the main level and seemed to be opening and closing cabinets in the kitchen. This cheered Augie and almost made up for the disruptions of the day. After all, there might be a chance to get a few bites of whatever people food they were making down there. Sashying confidently to the bottom of the stairs, she positioned herself in the very middle of the kitchen, where the big humans would certainly see that she was open to receiving more gifts of food.

The lady was frying something on the stovetop that sizzled and it smelled heavenly. Turning her pink nose upward, Augie sniffed appreciatively and moved closer to the source of the aroma. To her consternation, however, the big humans continued to ignore her presence, deftly stepping around her on the floor. When strips of meat were delivered to the children on a tray, she saw her chance. Quietly leaving the kitchen, she found the boy who was eating at the coffee table. Standing on her hind legs, she examined his breakfast as he stared at the TV.

show above. Stretching her neck just a little, she grabbed something at the edge of his plate in her teeth and easily dragged it from the table. At this, he called out, with what seemed to be, a combination of distress and amusement, and the girl child began laughing wildly. The cat was aware that the people were all talking about her. However, her objective had been achieved, and she gobbled down the delicious morsel before the lady could stop her. Then everyone simply said, naughty orgy, as if it mattered to her at all what they thought.

The bacon had been scrumptious, and she had no regrets. In fact, she felt quite satisfied with herself. alas she was rudely ejected from the family room after the bacon incident sitting nearby Augie stopped to compose herself first she bathed again and smoothed the fur that had been disarranged during her breakfast capers then heading to the comparative tranquility of the living room she hopped up into her favourite upholstered armchair, but she had a lovely view out the front window. This was one of her usual sleeping spots,

and it had a nice indentation in a perfect oggy shape. One of the neighbours was outside now, and he seemed to be slowly excavating his vehicle from under the piles of white stuff. He paused his work in order to converse with the woman next door, who had emerged from her house. She began to similarly move snow around. The woman seemed to be trying to get all of the snow off her steps and her driveway. It seemed very silly to Orgy, as there was an awful lot of it.

Why bother? The man got inside his vehicle, and it spluttered weakly with annoyance. After a while, he seemed to give up, starting the car for the time being, and he disappeared inside his house, stomping his feet in front of the door. The lady remained outside, clearing her area. Even with the windows closed, Orgy could hear the rhythmic scraping of her shovel against the pavement

and the shush, shushing, as she made her way from one end to the other in neat rows. It was rather soothing, actually, to watch such monotonous work in progress. Augie felt the neighbour human was doing a good, job, even if her task was pointless. Looking above the woman's head at the front window of the house across the street, Augie saw her nemesis.

An orange cat was sitting in the window. Oggy gazed at the other feline with an attitude of disdain. Someday they would finally meet and then they would settle who was in charge around the neighbourhood. But after this haughty staring contest, Oggy yawned. The occasion of her long-awaited confrontation with the ginger cat was obviously not going to be today, and she was getting too sleepy to keep staring across the way.

Now that all the humans were up and... busy on the main level, the quietest place in the house was the upstairs. Dropping lightly to the floor, Oggie strode across the living room and padded up the carpeted staircase, heading for the big bedroom. The bed itself had not been made. This departure from routine was another sign that this was no ordinary day. The dishevelled bedding disturbed her sense of order And she sat looking around the room for a comfier perch She noticed that the curtains were blowing ever so slightly

Over the vent in the floor Walking over to examine the situation more closely She felt deliciously warm air coming out of the grate She closed her eyes rapturously And let the soft heat Woffed over her nose and her whiskers Blowing her fur gently upwards Then she circled three times

And awkwardly flopped herself down Completely covering the vent With her ample body Stretching her legs in either direction, she was quickly soothed into a brief nap on her cozy spot. In her little cat dream, she saw rolling, hilly backyards absolutely covered in white. Alluring red cardinals flapped and perched on tree branches and deckrails, providing endless entertainment.

It was a perfect winter wonderland and a feast for her feline eyes. But then the heat vent stopped producing warmth, and she was slowly pulled from her dream by the unpleasant sensation that the area around her was cooling down. Feeling a little grumpy, she decided to go. downstairs and eat her last five bites of kibble. When she arrived in the living area again, she saw that the small humans were creating a new sort of commotion. A box had been pulled out of the coat closet, and the children had strewn the contents

all about. There were hats, scarves, and various types of gloves and mittens lying everywhere. As she quietly went to her bowl and munched on the remains of her breakfast, she watched the boy human get into a pair of very bulky overalls that made a strange shushing sound. Then there was a zipping noise as he pulled upward and downward on the front of it. All was clearly not satisfactory because he was soon calling for the big humans to assist him in some way. Augie hopped on the couch in the family room

and observed further as the girl human picked up one glove and mitten after another unsuccessfully pulling them onto her small hands. Before long, both of the grown humans were involved in this onerous task of dressing the children in what appeared to be too many layers of clothing. Augie felt that even one layer was a puzzling waste of time. Why have additional ones? Then, there were many dull thumping noises as footwear was added to the mix.

With both children now now known, nearly unable to bend over. It was the adults who were trying to get their large and unwieldy shoes on. Neither the man nor the lady seemed to be very good at this game. They kept having to try one thing and then another. After what seemed an interminable amount of time, the children were shooed out the door and Oggy heard the garage door opening down stairs. Next, the children appeared in the backyard, each dragging something plastic behind

them. At the same time, similarly overdressed small people began crawling up the hill behind the houses in red, blue, black and green outfits, waving their arms at each other. Oggy was soon transfixed to see the littlest residents of the neighbourhood sailing down the snow-covered hill laughing and crying out with happiness. They did this over and over again and never appeared to grow bored.

Oggy, however, did eventually lose interest. Watching the children outside was, Fascinating for a time, but there was something pulling her toward the pile of scattered clothing by the front door. Leaving her perch by the window, she jumped down and made her way toward the foyer, weaving deftly between the legs of the family room chairs. Sniffing delicately at the discarded mittens and hats, she took in their odd sense. They had a stuffy sort of aroma, like they hadn't seen the light in a long time. Skirting the items and giving them a wide berth, she reached the object of her attention.

It was a box, a gloriously large box. Standing up on her hind legs, she peered over the side of it, but her weight, pulled it over, and it stood on its side, an abandoned glove resting in the bottom corner. She was a bit miffed at this development, but she made do by sitting just inside the overturned container as if it were a mountain cave. She felt the lovely smoothness of its interior cardboard sides and stayed there for a bit, keeping far away from the offending glove. Rubbing her face experimentally on the rough edge next to her face, she enjoyed its soothing feeling on her cheek. She rubbed her jaw there a few more times, noting with satisfaction

that she had managed to shed some loose fur in the process. She could see it clinging to the cardboard, staking her claim. People should know this was her box. She enjoyed ownership of her little cave for a while, but then she got curious about another small receptacle that lay empty near the front door. Crossing the tiled floor, she saw that it had formerly, had some boots in it, and those were now lying scattered nearby. Orgy was filled with an irresistible urge to be inside that bootbox.

It was the natural order of things that she should. She circled the little rectangle, putting first one and then the other front foot inside. Then she hiked a back foot in and tried to fit. her behind, but she couldn't quite fit. Turning in a small circle, she pulled her enormous fluffy tail very close to her body until she could almost touch the end with her nose. She rotated, and then she dropped heavily into the center of the box with a huff. Yes, she was.

was entirely inside. Never mind that as she shifted her weight in an attempt to get more comfortable, two of the corners of the box came unglued and a side fell outward. In fact, it was perfect. She was filled with a sense of security and happiness. Augie enjoyed this perfect resting spot

for a good while. The house was relatively quiet, except for the tap, tap, tapping of the humans using their devices and the occasional chortle of the coffee pot as it dispensed a fresh pot. The sun crept higher in the sky, casting a friendly sunbeam through the window of the foyer. It warmed her fur all. over, and she slowly drifted in and then out of sleep, losing track of time. Orgy's nap in the box ended with a gentle nudge when she heard the sliding door downstairs open. The big humans left their devices and descended, holding towels.

Orgy resolved to watch the action from a safe distance and she perched on a middle step, peering downward into the furnished walk-out basement. The two small humans had returned and they stood rather helplessly inside the door with bits of snow all around them. Their arms were outstretched and their cheeks which peaked from their copious outerware

were pink with exertion. Both of them were babbling nonsense as the big humans knelt and moved around them stripping off the many layers they had so carefully applied earlier in the day. As they did, they continuously wiped the fast melting snow off the floor

and carried off soggy clothing, hanging it on a hook. in a nearby bathroom. When the last of the items were draped in safe places, the children scampered upstairs. Augie hastily retreated to the living room and observed, not wanting to have their damp little hands mushing her fur. They blabbed something at her.

All she understood was Orgy, and then they had trooped. onward. She continued to the upstairs, where she could now hear the rushing of the water in the tub. This piqued her interest immediately, for she did enjoy observing a good bath. It was such a delight to dip one's paws in the water, since swimming was a bit too much for her dignity to bear, and the bathroom was always so lovely and warm. Following at a safe distance,

she cautiously hung back in the hallway. Oggy waited until the human children was splashing in the bath. When the big people left to fetch some towels, she strode into the bathroom, eliciting cries of welcome from the children. Feeling very important, she accepted their invitation to stand on her hind legs and peer over the side.

A mountain of frothy white bubbles rested on the water. All around, her nose could sense an infinite number of tiny popping spheres. Her whiskers tingled with it, and her sensitive ears were filled with the very quiet, crackling song they made. made by the thousands. One of the children blew apart a pile of bubbles in their hands, and it seemed like a million tiny rainbows were dispersed into the air, showering down around Orgy's head. They both giggled uncontrollably as a large bubble landed on Augie's forehead, causing her to temporarily freeze with uncertainty.

Crossing her eyes, ever so slightly, she sneezed and the bubble was no more. The children laughed again, imitating her sneeze, which she did feel was a bit unnecessary. Regaining her dignity, she dropped back to the floor and sauntered out the door of the bathroom, just as the human lady re-entered with a pile of fluffy blue towels. She made sure to hold her tail high as she disappeared haughtily into the dimness of the hallway. Returning to the main floor of the house, she was drawn to the front window by the sound of some kind of loud machine outside. Hopping up onto the arm of her favourite chair, she saw that an enormous vehicle was slowly moving

up and down the street. Its lights were flashing and it had a huge metal piece in front of it. As she watched, transfixed, it slowly scraped all the snow to the side, leaving a grey ribbon of road in its path. This massive vehicle wasn't quite as interesting to watch as the garbage truck, but it was close. She followed its activities up and down, up and down, until it completed its mysterious work and backed back out of the cul-de-sac, disappearing around the corner.

As she watched it go, a neighbour walked by with a very excited black Labrador on a leash. The dog was in high spirits. That much was obvious. It was scampering in circles, wagging its tail wildly and rolling in the snow. The owner was obviously having trouble keeping up and was repeatedly pulled in one direction and then another. Dogs were such simple creatures. Augie thought to herself, Then she yawned and watched calmly as the Labrador and its owner vanished around the corner. The street had become rather dull, and she was finished looking at it. While she'd been observing the goings on in the front, the small humans had emerged from their bath and returned to the family room. Orgy noticed that they were wearing fresh bedtime clothes. which was a little odd since it was still afternoon.

The pleasant smell of cooking food was emanating from the kitchen again. The children set about making a mess of the family room, pulling all the cushions off the couch and draping their blankets over the top of them. In doing so, they created dark little caves for themselves and then promptly wiggled inside and turned to watch the television. Well, this was the type of activity

Augie could approve of. Heidi Holes were one of her favorite things, and these were new and unexpected ones that had spontaneously appeared out of nowhere. Orgy walked over to the pile of pillows and blankets and nosed her way in between the children causing them to make cooing noises and giggle quietly. She turned in several tight circles

and then collapsed into a comfortable heap, squeezed right between them. Having claimed her section of the pillow fort, she began to give her ample body another good bath. It was hours since she'd had the last one. And then nestled comfortable, between the two little warm people, clad as they were in cosy pyjamas, she found she was quite trousy again. She was dimly aware of the children eating off of plates that arrived

on a tray, and she heard the droning of the television in the background. But soon, all the little noises of the house blended into a soothing soundtrack that was perfect for her little catnab and she lost track of time again. In this way, she and her little humans passed the rest of the daylight hours together, cuddled under their lovely pillow fort. As the sun began to drop below the horizon, increased activity in the kitchen, slowly pulled Augie from her afternoon respite. She noticed she was now alone in the pillow cave, and she stretched luxuriously,

bringing all her senses back to full alertness. Extricating herself from the tangle of blankets, she emerged to see the big humans working in the nearby kitchen. Of greater interest, however, was that the door to the deck had been opened. The children were out there in pyjamas and boots, gathering snow into large balls. Augie was invigorated by the frosty air that blew across her face, and she eagerly approached the door, interested in exploring the outside. She stood at the threshold, whiskers tingling,

and experimentally stuck a paw into the snow on the other side. The sensation was so strange. Her paw was very cold, and it sunk downward in an unexpected way, making a small crunching noise. Leaning forward, she put out the other poor, and now she was half in and half out of the snow, with her front legs experiencing a wet, cold feeling, and her back legs warm and dry on the inside of the house.

All of a sudden, instinct caused her to scoot backward, shaking the offending wetness off of her front feet and returning hastily to the cozy house. Instead, she satisfied herself with sitting on the back of the couch and observing while the small humans continued to cavort about the deck. She didn't understand what they were doing, but it was something to watch. Eventually, as dusk fell, the children got cold and came inside, leaving their booths by the door. As the dinner hour unfolded and the kitchen area became very busy, Augie chose to relocate to the comparative peace and quiet of the living room. After all, a kitty could only be expected to tolerate so much human company at a stretch.

While sitting in the windowsill, she observed the darkening landscape of the street. It was lamplit now, when the piles of ploughed and shoveled snow created a stark, black and white environment that was broken by pools of glowing illumination from above. A neighbour, idled, speaking cheerfully to her dog who snuffled about to snowdrift. Yet another person who lived nearby was shoveling their steps. It seemed these humans could not agree on the right time to move the snow back and forth.

How strange they could be sometimes, Orgy thought to herself. Then something very interesting happened. White flakes began falling from the sky again. She could see them, like a thousand little butterflies or bits of paper, fluttering across the lamplight in the street. As she watched all the plowed and shoveled places turned from grey back to white, erasing the human work of the day.

She gazed at this fresh snow for a long time as it was falling, falling, falling, into the gloom of the oncoming night. Then, feeling tranquil, she hopped down from the window, strolling briefly over the heat vent. It warmed her entire body pleasantly, fluffing her fur upwards.

She sat there for a few minutes, peering into the family room to see what the humans were doing now. Dinner was over, and they had all gathered around the coffee table. Coming closer, Orgy could see that there were many small plastic items lying about on the coffee table, and there were also stacks of cards. The people were pushing the plastic pieces here and there, handing cards back and forth,

and occasionally issuing loud exclamations and clapping. The boy and girl bounced up and down, seated atop pillows on the floor. Intrigued, Augie sidled closer. Then, appearing at the end of the coffee table, she sprang upward, intent upon putting herself in the middle of this game. As she prepared to swat one of the plastic pieces with her paw, the children let her head. out a squawk. Unfortunately, in moments, the man-human had unceremoniously plunked her back on the floor. She was very put out at being excluded from this fascinating family activity.

Luckily, there was a consolation. A fire had been lit in the nearby hearth, which was a somewhat rare occurrence. Lured by the promise of its radiating warmth, she walked closer, finding that someone had thoughtfully placed her fuzzy cat bed nearby. Pausing to push at it with her paws, she closed her eyes, losing herself in the hypnotic dancing of the low flames behind the screen. Watching the humans and the fire, was making her feel snoozy.

Hawkey was filled with a sense of well-being and climbed into the bed, turning around three times. Then she softly dropped herself into its cushiony softness and curled her tail over the tip of her nose. She lay there like that. Just listening to all the sounds around her.

The fire was popping gently. The refrigerator was humming. The people were murmuring and laughing. The heat was blowing softly out of the floor vents across the room. She watched, through half-opened eyes, as the man brought steaming mugs from the kitchen and carefully placed one in front of each family member. Then he put a bag of little white puffy things in the middle of the table.

Both of the small humans eagerly plunged their fists inside, pulling out small handfuls. Augie observed with mild interest as they dropped the soft white things into their cups, one by one, stirring the contents with a spoon. Humans were so odd, she mused, putting their kibble into their water containers. She let her eyes close gently.

In the darkness behind her eyelids, she imagined she was looking out the window. She saw pretty white flakes falling. They were flying, they were floating, they were coming to a rest in great downy piles. Then, flitting across this winter wonderland, she imagined the red flash of a cardinal's, feathers.

Through a haze of oncoming sleep, Augie thought happily of the bowl of bedtime kibble she'd be getting in just a little while. Then she pictured what she'd do first when the humans went to sleep and she had the moonlit house to herself again. After all, Nighttime was her time to roam.

But, just now, curling herself just a little more tightly and nestling herself deeper into her bed, it was time for a rest. And with that, Augie drifted off into sweet little kitty dreams. ...you know... It was a wet and blustery morning, and that was just fine with Oogie. After all, being wet was just a vague idea when she had her comfortable indoor. spots in front of each window. Perched on the back of the sofa in the family room,

she watched the raindrops skittering diagonally across the glass. Fat blobs, tiny blobs, slow ones and fast ones, moved in a mysterious dance down the window. In slow motion, she picked up her paw, placing it hesitantly against the cool, smooth surface in front of her. She sat there for a moment, transfixed. First, her attention was drawn by the raindrop that evaded the grasp of her velvety foot. Then, turning her head slightly, she puzzled over the ghostly mirror image of her paw that floated outside the window. Placing her foot back on the sofa, she allowed her eyes to drift shut for a moment. Water and windows were confusing.

She had grown tired of these deep thoughts, so she turned and hopped down. first onto the firm nubbly cushions of the couch and then to the smooth surface of the hardwood floor beneath as she sauntered past her bowl which sat nearby in the kitchen she eyed the small pile of food she had saved there from breakfast one must provide for one's mid-morning snacks of course she felt pleased by her obvious self-control. Augie walked slowly into the living room. On a sunny day, this was where she would normally have her morning nap. The humans very sensibly placed her favourite cat bed on the floor there, right where a big sunbeam would rest on the area rug.

However, today was not sunny. Feeling quite put out by the lack of golden glow in her sleeping spot, she walked over to the heat vent. Ah, yes. The nice, warm air was puffing out of it, just as she had hoped. She sniffed it first, feeling the dry heat as it blew in her eyes and nose. Having confirmed that this place was satisfactory, she turned her ample body and plopped it down atop the vent, then rolled luxuriously to the side. She closed her eyes happily and turned her nose up to the ceiling

as the heavenly warmth toasted her soft belly and set the long fur on her tail. to waving. Delightful. As she lay there, drifting downward into sleep, she was faintly aware of the pattering of the raindrops on the front window above her head. Drowsily, she imagined what she would be seeing if she hopped up on the armchair and took her post there. Often, she spent her time monitoring the front walk and watching the dogs, always the dogs. They were such predictable creatures, with their walks at the same times and their eager interest in the same mailboxes and garden beds.

She had a faint awareness that something to do with dogs might be going on outside, something she should keep an eye on. But then she gave up the idea. She was just too warm and sleepy, and she couldn't be bothered, frankly. Augie might have stayed in her comfy spot on the heat vent for a very long time that day, but two things happened to disturb her rest. The first annoyance was that the air stopped coming out of the grate. This happened quite often in her experience,

and she felt it was entirely rude and unnecessary. But then, something even more disruptive pulled her from her slumber. She could hear the garage door opening. Its grinding, ostentatious noises penetrated the front window behind her. She had learned that when the garage door opened, automobile noise would follow. Of course, it did. She grumbled inwardly. It seemed the humans were home.

This would make things very noisy. The door opened in the walk-out basement downstairs, confirming her suspicions. One after the other, she heard umbrellas pop open. The people were placing their dripping items down there to dry. She made a mental note that she would need to go sit underneath the umbrellas later, after all the dampness had gone, of course. It was the natural thing for a cat to do when umbrellas were available. But there was more than just drying and hanging up of coats and umbrellas going on down there.

It seemed like there were an awful lot of instructions being issued. The small humans were unusually loud. They had those excited voices that generally made Orgy run for a hiding spot. The children tended to be grabby when they were too wound up, and petting the cat always seemed to be on their agenda at such times. Orgy pulled herself up to an alert, seated position and turned her ears back. She would wait and see what happened when they came upstairs. If necessary, she would flee.

Thump, thump, thump, thump went the feet as the entire family trooped up the staircase. First, the children, who spilled excitedly onto the main level, then the lady human. Lastly, the man appeared, awkwardly carrying something large, And when Orgy saw that thing, she was filled with concern. It was the cat container that was used to transport her in the automobile. She loathed the automobile, and she was not having any of that today.

Augie slunk over to the corner between the arm of the sofa and the wall and peered suspiciously out, sure that no one. Nobody would see her there. The man placed the cat container on the floor and, with some difficulty, made the front door of it open. Then all the people stood back. The lady shushed the children and they obeyed, but they stood at some distance, hopping from one foot to the other as if they would burst with energy.

The man stood up with his hands on his hips, and they all waited, watching the mouth of the little cage carefully. And then, Augie saw something that made her hackles rise. A teeny, tiny, orange cat came awkwardly stepping out of the door of the pet carrier. It was less than a quarter the size of Oggy. and its little eyes were like dark buttons in its squashy face. No more than a doddering puffball, it seemed incapable of walking with any dignity. Instead, it stretched one paw forward, then another, lurching about.

Its tiny tails stood out straight as a poker behind it. Orgy viewed the small cat with dismay. This would not do. It would not do at all. She craned her neck around the side of the sofa and watched the furry cream puff as it perambulated unsteadily around the living room. So far, she had remained unnoticed by the people,

and she felt that was important. She had yet to assess this foreign threat to her personal space. But the interloper had not even noticed, Ogie. It was far too busy, bounding unpredictably around the carpeted area of the room. It explored one furniture leg after another, marveling at the looming presence of the coffee table. Redirecting her unblinking gaze from the kitten to the humans, Augie saw with indignation that none of them were even paying any attention to her.

This was incredibly cheeky of them, especially considering the inconvenience of this disruption. Instead of looking sorry or reassuring her that the orange creature would soon be leaving, the humans appeared besotted with it. The children laid down on their stomachs and watched the interloper's random progress around the room cooing softly. She could tell they were just waiting until they could pick it up and give it all of their attention. And while she didn't particularly want them petting her own fur and bothering her, she also didn't. She also also felt oddly resentful that they might redirect their worship to another cat. Then the fur ball tottered over to the children and sniffed their faces,

and they made gooey noises at it and started calling it by a name. Meatball, they were saying. Meatball? They seemed to be getting awfully familiar. Surely this other cat wasn't staying? What kind of a name was Meatball? The grown-ups spoke some words to the children, and they reluctantly stood up and retreated into the nearby family room,

talking excitedly. Left to his own devices, the orange kitten spied his carrier, with the door open. Staggering, awkwardly, he retreated to its familiar opening, snuggling down into a fuzzy blue blanket that was sitting inside. Augie remained out of sight, but watched the creature carefully. Good, she thought. Perhaps he's leaving soon.

The kitten's head nodded slightly, and his eyes closed, and she realized he had drifted off to sleep, exhausted by his enormous adventure around the living room. Creeping around the couch, she took her opportunity to escape the room. She made straight for her cat door and burst out onto the back deck, where the rain had paused and the air was fresh. Seating herself delicately in a spot with no puddles, Augie pondered the situation in solitude.

It was cool outside. The only noises came from the birds, who seemed to be enjoying a break in the rainfall. Augie primly made her way around the deck. It was a place where she felt confident and in charge. The kitten would not be able to find her there. She would wait a little while, and when she returned to the inside, she felt confident the other cat would be gone.

Alas, there was no snoozing outside when everything was wet, so Oggy soon tired of lapping at this or that puddle. Her tummy grumbled lightly, and she realised it was time for her mid-morning snack. With happiness, she thought of the small portion of food she had saved from her breakfast, and she decided it was probably safe to go inside and enjoy it now. Pushing her way back through the cat flap, she shook the moisture off her paws and turned to her food bowl. She did this just in time to see the unwelcome orange visitor, sticking its nose into her reserve of food.

No meatball, the oldest child cried, scooping the offender into her hands. Then she put her face close to him and babbled some nonsense. Augie couldn't understand. But Orgy didn't have time to ponder what was being communicated. She hurried to her bowl and finished off her snack. before the other cat could return. It was clear that she was going to have to be very vigilant with this uninvited guest around.

While Oggy was eating, the child had put meatball down. Augie could see him now making a beeline for the carpeted stairs that led to the upper level of the house. Licking her chops, she sat down and watched as the creature sat himself at the bottom stair, mewing loudly. The step was nearly as tall as he was. It was clear that he didn't know how to navigate it, although he desperately wished to try.

The youngest human went to the stair and helped the ginger kitten onto the first step, whispering encouraging sounding words. Emboldened by this success, the little cat sank its claws into the rug on the second stair and clambered up like a rock climbering a cliff wall. Then he busily examined the stair, sniffing every corner of it before advancing to the third.

The children chuckled with delight to see his spunky progress, but his energy ran out before he was even halfway up. He turned, obviously wishing to go down again. But going down the stairs was more intimidating than ascending them, apparently. Augie was filled with a feeling of smug satisfaction. The humans would soon see that this other cat was far too much trouble to have around. How could they always help it down the stairs and up the stairs? It was preposterous.

They should return the thing at once from whatever place it had come. And then the unthinkable happened. The children suddenly decided it was time for meatball to meet Oggy. They scooped the mulling kitten up in their hands and came straight for the place where she was sitting in the family room. She didn't even have time to scuttle away. In a moment, they had plopped meatball right in front of her, and the saucy fellow was boldly sniffing her paws, even as she backed away.

The orange kitten sat down and looked up at Orgy, winking its tiny button eyes. Orgy sat frozen at attention. She was a mountain of cat compared to this tiny intruder with the squeaky voice. Augie felt a quiet grumble grow in her throat. She wanted these humans to know that she did not approve of any new cats and that this one was being vetoed. But before Augie could even finish her indignant display, the kitten spied her sharply twitching

tail and pounced on it. The small humans laughed wildly as the orange bundle of fur went tumbling, and Augie turned awkwardly in a half circle. This succeeded only in moving her tail again, and meatballs sprang for a second time. Then, before Augie could display her disapproval, the beguiling little creature rolled over on its side and sniffed the long, soft fur, peering up at her adoringly. Orgy looked down at him, relenting just a bit. It was clear that she was still the boss here, and the newcomer appeared to be both helpless

and naive. She supposed she would tolerate him for a while. Still, she didn't want to give the humans the wrong impression. Orgy was assuming this orange fellow would not be staying permanently, and she would not be responsible for him. But somehow, in his little baby brain, Meatball had gotten the idea that Augie was his new friend. She stood up,

gathering the shreds of her dignity and raising her tail out of his reach. Meatball seemed undeterred by the withdrawal of the fluffy target and pranced awkwardly behind her as she headed for her water bowl. Augie kept her focus straight ahead. As she approached the bowl, its water fountain activated, sending out a cheerful bubble of fresh water. Augie leaned down to drink from the best part of the bowl, where the water came out.

Meanwhile, Meatball was transfixed by the ripples in its lower depths, moving his wispy tail back and forth and wiggling his bottom. He stared at the tiny bubbles in the dish with his glistening eyes. Orgy pretended not to notice his embarrassing exuberance. My goodness, she thought, it's just a water bowl. But the next thing she knew, his paw flashed into the water and sent several droplets flying. One of them landed on Augie's nose.

abruptly she stopped sipping at her fountain and set up straight. She was still for a moment, unsure of how to remove the droplet from between her eyes. She stuck out her tongue experimentally, but she only succeeded in swiping the end of her nose. The quivering crystal bubble still hovered in her vision. up near her eyes. Then, instinctively, she shook her head, causing the liquid bead to fly away. Meatball was now fully absorbed by the pool of water in front of him,

and he was smacking little showers of it this way and that. It pattered onto the floor. The children were soon at his side, laughing and saying, no meatball. With his hallmark lack of focus, he immediately forgot about his soggy game, rolling over to be cradled in their adoring hands once again. Orgy mentally huffed with indignation.

He was going to have to learn not to pander to the humans so much while they'd never leave him alone. Ogie got some relief from the interloper at that point because the children whisked him away to the family room. There, they plopped him down on the couch between them. Augie strolled over to the edge of the room near the heat vent, which was now blessedly emitting warm air once again. From this comfortable distance, she continued to warily observe.

the small humans and their new friend. The children had pulled out the flat, rectangular object that seemed to absorb so much of their attention. They poked at it with their fingers, and it lit up, casting a glow on their faces. After gibbering to each other for a moment, they appeared to agree upon what would happen next. The oldest child began swiping her hand around the rectangle in earnest.

Both little ones cried out with excitement as some game or other commenced. Quiet sounds drifted from the item in their hands. These were strange noises, like crashing and crushing and bouncing. meatball tottered into the lap of the child holding the rectangle and peered at it from between her arms his bright round eyes were wide with interest and his head began to dart back and forth then without warning he pounced on the screen causing the children riotous amusement Soon it was like Meatball was playing the game as much as the children, sliding his paws from one corner of the rectangle to the other,

small noises showering around him. This was apparently so entertaining that the lady humans stopped by to watch as well, smiling and chattering to the children. Orgy observed this spectacle stoically. How easy it was, she mused, for this newcomer to seem brilliant and entertaining. He was eager to please, but she knew that he would soon need to establish his superiority to the humans, if he expected to get proper service from them. Feeling dismissive, she turned and,

Abandoned the circus in the family room, it was all simply too exhausting. With a feeling of pleasant drowsiness, Augie returned to the living room. She spied her favourite soft cat bed. It was the perfect size for her, and all smushy like a marshmallow. Stepping into the centre of it, she circled. one, two, three times. She had to make sure she landed facing exactly the right direction. Then, in a fluid movement, she collapsed in a circle inside it,

completely filling its shape with her soft fur. She neatly wrapped her tail around her paws. It was time for a short nap. The rain was still tapping gently on the glass. Resting there, Oggy was soothed by the sound of it. The nearness of the rain sounds made the more boisterous noises from the family room seem reassuringly far away. She snuggled her nose more deeply into her paws, covering it with the tip of her tail.

Her breathing slowed and then became even and slightly audible. Without her being aware of it, the soundtrack of the rain and the wish of the heat whispering from the floor vent gave way to a dream about the outdoors. In her mind's eye, she saw the downpour splashing in puddles on the deck and petite sparrows perching on the railing. She happily imagined squirrels darting through nearby tree branches as she watched with interest.

It was a beautiful dream. But then, very gradually, in her imaginary world of the back deck, there was a sound that didn't fit. It was a rumble. No. It was a growl. A lawnmower, perhaps? No, that wasn't right. Rising slowly from the depths of her nap, Augie once again became aware of her surroundings. She was in her soft, comfy bed, and the rain still sounded persistently on the glass window behind her. The heat vent still sang its comforting song.

But there was something else happening close by, and she had to open her eyes to see what it was. Sitting there, right in front of her, with a look of serious concentration, was meatball. He was meditatively pawing the edge of her bed with his tiny little footpaths and staring earnestly right in her eyes. eyes. The noise she had heard in her dream was actually his loud, breathy purr. Indeed, it was quite

impressive the level of vibration he was able to achieve for being such a small cat. Looking eagerly at her, he stretched and pulled, stretched and pulled his paws, as if needing a very important batch of biscuit dough. She had to admit, he was really putting all his energy into the process, as if by making these biscuits he was working on the most important project in the world. Augie might have felt annoyed at this intrusion into her treasured space, but she understood his comfort-seeking impulses. she couldn't fault him for them.

After all, he didn't have his own bed, and hers was really the best place in the entire house. He had better judgment than she'd imagined. As she was processing all of this, Meatball became very bold and hauled himself up onto her cushion. Caught off guard, she skewed. suited herself backwards. But before she could do anything, he had turned three times and then

plopped down right in the curve of her belly. Oggy did not know what to do. She had never shared her bed before. Although meatball didn't take up much room, this was an unusual loss of personal space for her. But the purr motor continued, and Meatball rolled backward, sticking out his feet. Augie noted that these were surprisingly large, compared to the rest of him. Then, as if conquering a foreign land, he began trying to grab one of the ungainly appendages, licking it with his pink sandpaper tongue. Oogie watched this effort with fascination.

What a terrible job he's doing, she scoffed inwardly. Didn't he know how to complete this simple task? After all, bathing was one of a cat's main responsibilities. A feline had to keep up respectable appearances. Unable to bear his ineptitude, Oggy began roughly licking Meatball's ears and head. If he was going to be in her bed, this kitten needed to be clean. Meatball seemed perfectly happy to accept her help,

and he ceased trying to grab his enormous foot. He leaned back on Oggy's soft fur and closed his eyes into tight seams. His tiny pot belly began rising and falling softly, as she took care of his bath for him. At one point his eyes opened briefly, and he swatted at his own tiny tail, which was visible between his feet. But this fascination soon took a back seat to exhaustion. It had already been an extremely. busy day. For Meatball, a nap was soon going to be unavoidable. As she busily finished bathing her uninvited visitor, Oggy saw that Meatball was heading for Dreamland. His purring continued

autonomously for a while, but then it got softer and slower, and his little tummy rose and fell with a regular rhythm. Then, lying right there in that undignified, sprawled position, he was asleep. Well, this was a fine kettle of fish, Augie thought, with exasperation. The humans brought home a helpless infant and then took almost no responsibility for his training. He didn't even have his own cat bed yet, and he had no idea about water fountain etiquette. She could see that she would be very busy

making sure that Meatball understood the rules of the house, and, furthermore, how to wash his own feet. Her work would never be done. But for now, she had to grudgingly admit that he was very warm, snuggled into the bed with her, and the rain was still falling. Pitter-pat, pitter-pat. Despite her many thoughts, her eyes grew droopy again. The noises of human life drifted to her from the distant kitchen.

kitchen. Doors opened and closed. Children babbled. Water ran into the sink and then stopped. She would find Meatball his own sleeping place tomorrow, she thought, fuzzily, as she succumbed to her dreams once again. That is, if he wasn't scheduled to leave. But even as she flipped the end of her tail over her nose and took a deep sigh, part of her secretly accepted the idea

that perhaps this impertinent little puffball would be her new buddy. Maybe. If he behaved himself. And then, putting these matters aside for later, Oogie was asleep. Augie. Orgy had been at the window for some time, when the coffee machine sprang to life.

Issuing its cheerful gurgles and pops, it began filling up its tall silver pot. Just like it did, every day at this time, the aroma of the people's morning drink wafted through the kitchen, eventually reaching Augie, where she sat on the back of the couch. She was looking out the window, of course, surveying the yard. The sky was just beginning to get light.

She could see tiny green buds dotting the branches of the trees. Although the window was closed against the chill, she could almost feel the brisk air that would touch her nose if she were allowed outside on the deck. Still, indoors, this oddly comforting morning drink smell was appealing as well. And also, she thought to herself, it meant that it was time for her to go stomp on the people in their bed.

As she noiselessly ascended the carpeted stairs, she yawned and reflected on the lazy humans. What would they do, she wondered, if Orgy were not there to wake them each morning. Their sacred morning drinks would get cold, for starters. The small humans would not make it to the yellow bus on time. Everything would be in shambles, she thought, with disapproval. She entered the largest bedroom.

There they were, the man and the lady huddled like two lumps under their covers, snoozing away. And between them, a tiny orange clump breathed rhythmically, its fur expanding and contracting in a predictable rhythm. The kitten, whose name was Meatball, was obviously kissing up to the humans again.

Augie thought, with mild annoyance, how any self-respecting feline would be up already, taking care of cat business. Augie hopped up on the brown wicker hamper and observed the three of them for just a moment. Then, in a swift movement, she jumped onto the bed, pushing the hamper to the side as she kicked off. It fell over with a satisfying thud, and a t-shirt tumbled out of the top. The man stirred, but he did not open his eyes. Meatball quivered in his sleep and flipped over into another furry clump. Orgy had hoped for better, but she knew from experience that it might take a few tries to get the humans up.

Stepping across the lady, she squeezed her considerable girth onto the small nightstand and knocked some hand cream to the ground, making a place for herself to sit. This got Meatball's attention. Instantaneously, his little head popped out of its cozy environs, his enormous ears perking up. He stared at Orgy with a wide gaze and waited. The lady opened one eyelid and then closed it, muttering testy words in Augie's direction.

But getting that small response showed Orgy. that victory was nigh. She leaned over and began lapping from the drinking glass on the lady's bedside table. Augie's pink tongue splashed loudly as she took in the lukewarm water.

At this, the lady woke completely and made an irritated noise, rising quickly to a seated position. The man rolled over, propped himself up, and laughed, murmuring words to the lady. Meatball struggled into a seated position, looking confused but interested. His fur stuck out in every direction, the sure sign of a kitten who had slept well. Game, set. Match. The family was up.

The lady took the glass away, which was fine. After all, Oggy hadn't really been very thirsty. The man disappeared into the hallway. Orgy knew he would return with the fragrant morning drink in two cups. Feeling very pleased with herself, she retreated to the bottom of the bed, and began to give herself a bath. The morning was proceeding as planned. The humans moved quietly around, turning on taps in the bathroom and walking in an out of the windowless room

where they kept all the clothing. This did not concern Orgy. She finished her bath and then turned several times in a circle collapsing heavily into a napping position, with her tail over her nose. She was feeling very sleepy. She drifted in and out of slumber, vaguely aware of the morning business being conducted around her. Meanwhile, Meatball staggered to the end of the bed, stretching his long limbs comically.

He was going through a growth stage where his arms, legs, and ears seemed to be outpacing his body. Cracking one eyelid open, Augie thought to herself that it was not his best look. But then she happily closed her eyes again and resumed resting. At some point, Augie's nose detected. fresh, cool air moving through the room. She awakened and saw that the people had made a crack in the window, allowing the outside to come in. Rousing herself, she hopped off the bed and investigated at the window sill.

The window crack might just be large enough, she thought. Hesitating only once, she leaptly. up into the window and flattened herself to an impressive degree, squeezing into the open space. It was a little tight, but she tried to make it look easy. After all, she thought, a cat must retain her dignity. She sat like that, while the big humans got the small humans out of bed, preferring to remain out of the fray. Eventually, the commotion upstairs stopped, and the people all went downstairs, with the excitable meatball skittering joyfully behind them.

In the blessed silence that remained, Augie reflected on how her right side, facing out, was pleasantly cool. Meanwhile, her left side, facing inward, was quite warm. But then, all this deep reflection was too much for her. And she closed her eyes and thought about breakfast. When she heard the thud of the front door closing, as it did every day behind the little humans, she knew her meal was imminent. She squeezed out from under the window sash and fell rather indelicately to the floor,

where she gathered her composure, unseen by anyone else. Then every inch the queen of the house, she strutted purposefully toward the stairs and descended. Just as she did, she heard the bowls being placed on the floor. At this, she picked up her pace slightly. She didn't want meatball to get his eager. her little whiskers into her bowl. Orgy had a few moments to prevent that scenario,

since Meatball was currently chowing on his own food, which was served in a cutesy little dish next to her own. She viewed him with mild distaste as she lowered herself by her meal and laid into her own breakfast. Orgy didn't want to hurry. In fact, she preferred to stretch her meals out a bit. But ever since Meatball had arrived a few months ago, she'd learned that to leave any food behind

was to risk losing it to her youthful challenger. He did seem to be hungry all the time. As a result of her concern, Augie and Meatball finished their breakfast portions simultaneously, a few minutes later. As she sipped from one side of the pet fountain, she watched Meatball getting his snout wet on the other side. He smacked away at the water with obvious delight, not caring at all that he had droplets on his whiskers and the fur of his skin. face. It was par for the course. He'd been here for simply weeks, Oggy thought, and his manners

had barely improved. She was sitting nearby, pondering her next move, when Orgy heard a commotion in the next room. She strolled in that direction, with meatball trotting cheerfully at her heels. Orgy ignored him as she sat down and watched the human lady do some odd things. First, the woman stood some tall sticks in the corner. Orgy had seen these before. The humans tended to walk them around the room, pressing them on the floor. One of them made a whisk, whisk sound that she found a a bit alarming.

The other had long tentacles that she felt compelled to watch carefully. There was also a plastic bucket which the lady took to the sink, turning the water on full blast. While it filled, she opened and closed cabinets, slamming them in a rude and noisy manner. Orgy was transfixed and repelled by all this unusual morning busyness.

She didn't flee as it seemed important to keep tabs on the situation. But she did flatten her ears in annoyance, attempting to block some of the many sounds assaulting her ears. Meatball seemed unconcerned. He skittered over to the sticks, wiggled his hindquarters, comically, and then pounced on them. When he did this,

one of the sticks was dislodged from its resting position against the wall and went crashing to the ground. In his inexperience, Meatball had not seen this coming, and he jumped in the air, making a bee-line for the upstairs. Augie watched him tear up the steps, lodging his claws in the carpet to gain traction. Then she turned her gaze calmly back to the fallen stick, which was lying on the floor.

At that moment, the water in the sink was turned off. Ah, thought Augie. It was quiet again. excellent. But a respite was not to last. The lady went bustling importantly across the room with the bucket in her hand. Meanwhile, on the other side of the living room,

the man bent over to push a button and Augie knew what was coming. The roaring, sucking robot creature was being activated. This was certainly an unwelcome development. Having started this commotion, the man took the bucket from the lady's hand, picked up the two sticks,

and trudged into the lower level of the house. Borgie's relationship with the robot vacuum was largely hostile. She had quickly learned she needn't fear it, but she loathed its long and raucous cleaning sessions. It roamed with no apparent pattern, making it impossible for her to choose a safe spot anywhere within its reach. But more than that, it dislodged and inconvenienced her, and she took exception with that. As a result, she felt it necessary to exert her dominance by refusing to budge. When the vacuum came near her, she was compelled to sit very still and appear unflappable

as it bounced against her feet, trying to drive through her. Sometimes she would scoot back and give it a swat with her paw, whisking her tail out of its path. In short, the robot vacuum was not the boss of her, but it was certainly an inconvenience. Meatball had not yet learned how to behave around the robot, and he had even gone so far as to hop on top of it, riding in circles as if they were friends.

But he would soon be too large to do. this, and she knew he would eventually have to take his rightful stance as its natural-born enemy. In the meantime, it was best he was not there while it was loose. Orgy stood her ground as the vacuum circled. Meanwhile, she was dimly aware that the lady had gone upstairs. Orgy was torn. Did she remain here to monitor the robot? Or did she leave to find out what was going on in the upper floor? Between the Lady Human and Meatball,

there was no telling what calamities could occur up there without her supervision. Orgy eyed the vacuum as it became trapped under a dining room chair. The machine turned and bumped, turned and bumped, too stupid to find its way out. Satisfied that the robot wouldn't be able to do any major harm, she slowly turned and loped up the stairs to investigate the situation there. As she approached the door to the grown-up bedroom, she saw a flurry of white sheets flying through the air. Meatball scampered across the open doorway, clearly overexcited.

Augie approached cautiously and watched as the lady pulled all the bedclothes and even the bed skirt off. She pushed the linens into piles. Then she sprinkled some kind of white powder all over the bed, and began vacuuming the mattress. Orgy was perplexed. How very odd, she thought. She had seen the bedclothes removed before, but this was really beyond the pale,

and she felt it to be unnecessarily disruptive. To make matters worse, the lady turned on some kind of music and began singing tunelessly along. Enigized by the cacophony, the woman then opened up a step-ladder, which gave way with a creaking protest. Having done so, she stood upon the second step, and, taking a fluffy duster in her hand,

she began wiping the ceiling fan. A shower of dust bunnies was released into the air, floating serenely downward. At this, Meatball could no longer contain himself. He jumped up on the bed and stood on his ungainly little legs, swatting uselessly at the puffs as they fell. The lady scolded him and pushed him off the bed, patting his bottom with the feather duster. Not to be so easily removed,

he twisted around and attacked the dust. with great vigor, kicking it with his rabbit-like feet as if his life depended on it. Augie backed herself into a corner and thought, what an undignified spectacle it all was. The lady, on the other hand, did not really seem angry with Meatball. She laughed to see that his gyrations had caused him to tumble off the bed, landing in the pile of bedding on the floor. Showing the resiliency of youth, Meatball wasn't even flustered by his unplanned landing on the sheets.

Forgetting the duster entirely, he took several menacing stances, attacking the white cloud beneath him from various angles. Augie watched him from the corner, oddly fascinated. Was there a creature underneath? Had he lost a toy in there? It was complete nonsense. She would reserve her energy for more important pursuits.

As Meatball wore himself out on the floor, the lady picked up a hand vacuum and began sucking up the powder from the mattress in even orderly strokes. This appears to be it. to Orgy, and she cautiously approached to sniff that part of the mattress. She stood on her hind legs, her ears alert, and observed as the white powder disappeared, row by row.

Then, propelled by an irresistible urge, she hopped up on the clean section and sat watching until the very end. Soon, she found herself in the center of a huge immaculate square. It was extremely satisfying, she thought. She would stay there for a few more minutes. The lady hummed to herself and walked around vacuuming the stray dust bunnies that had fallen from the fan earlier. followed her, poking his nose toward the vacuum attachment, and then jumping backward when it made a loud sound.

Thankfully, the hand vacuum and its hose were soon silenced and placed in a corner. The lady bustled into the bathroom, and Augie heard the shushing noise of something being sprayed over and over again. Hopping off the bed, she walked to the door and sat on the edge of the carpet, unwilling to step on the tiled portion inside. The lady human was in there with yellow rubbery things on her hands, and she was kneeling at the large water reservoir. Hoagie liked this place. She often sat inside it during the night, thinking about. how pleasant it was. Its sides were cool and dry and clean. It made an excellent hiding spot. At the moment, however, her hiding place was covered in foam, which the lady was spreading all around.

Soon there was water spraying everywhere as well. An artificial floral scent wafted out of the bathroom as the foam was washed away. Soon, the lady stood up and moved into the glass box, where the people bathed standing up. She began covering that place with foam, too. But this was one of Orgy's favourite things. She was dimly aware of meatball entering the bathroom and sitting behind her,

as she stalked energetically to the glass walls. Orgy sat outside while the lady sang to herself, spraying inside. Then she watched as the glass was covered in swirls while the lady scrubbed, obscuring herself from sight. Craning her neck left and right, Augie tried to see inside. Colours swirled and the foam distorted her view. And then the best part began.

The lady backed out of the box and turned on the water hose, spraying it all over the inside of the glass walls. Sensing the importance of this moment, Meatball rushed to Augie's side, and they both began tracking the falling drops, trying to stop them from falling. Maddeningly, even Orgy, with her greater prowess, couldn't seem to trap the little orbs under her paws.

They skittered unpredictably, left, right, left, as the cats dashed madly from one side of the wall to the other. Then, when Orgy was nearly beside herself, the lady began to wipe the drops away with a rubber blade. The blade erased the trails of water one by one, creating a clear, clean window into the bathing area once again. And then, the water was gone. Regarding the glass for another moment, Augie immediately translated. transitioned back to boredom and stalked back to the carpeted area. Meatball, on the other hand, poked about the bathroom, looking for a place to make trouble.

Augie knew that he wouldn't find anything to do. The people were totally devoted to locking up the interesting things in their bathing room. It was terribly tedious. Orgy was drawn to the hallway by the stairs. The lady was there, piling bed sheets from all the rooms onto the floor. She opened up the doors of the mysterious closet holding the spinning machines. Oh, how Orgy loved these white giants, with their hypnotic tumbling and the window that made clothing go around and around. They were also very warm, which suited her quite well.

She would have liked to get on top of them, but she was unfortunately a bit too unwieldy to reach such a height. It was an ongoing disappointment to her. The lady continued singing to herself and piled many of the bedsheets into the spinning machine, then turned it on. With a whoosh, it began to fill with water, singing its mysterious song. Then, to Augie's dismay, the lady briskly closed the doors, trapping the humming machines inside to do their work in darkness. As if she hadn't just done something very inconsiderate, She simply turned and went downstairs.

Orgy waited a moment and looked around. As she did, Meatball went scampering past and trotted down the steps himself. Torn between the desire for solitude and her curiosity, she soon grudgingly followed. But just as far as the middle landing of the staircase, where she could observe. the main level unseen. The robot vacuum had returned to its resting place. Seeing this, filled Augie with relief. Now, the man was in the living room,

taking all the things off the coffee table and stacking them on the floor. He was wiping the surface with a cloth. Tentatively, Augie finished descending. the staircase and sat at the edge of the room, observing the piles of large, flat books and the other knick-knacks standing about. Then, drawn irresistibly to the largest, clossiest book, she walked over and sat right in the middle of it. Looking around her, she felt very satisfied with this purge, and resolved to stay there

for a few more moments. In fact, she began to feel drowsy and lay all the way down, squeezing her large bottom within the confines of the book and folding up her paws so that she resembled a loaf of bread. Out of the corner of her eye,

she spied Meatball, who was sniffing delicately at nearby candles and picture frames. He swatted experimentally at one of the photos, and it fell over, making no sound as it hit the carpet. However, he obviously found this disappointing and soon walked away. Just when Orgy was about to fall asleep, the man woke her with an audacious push. He spoke words in her direction and pulled the book right out from under her, placing it back, on the table. Having been so inconsiderately ejected from her napping perch, Augie decided to retire to her

cat bed. But to her annoyance, Meatball, who had never learned boundaries, was curled up there, fast asleep. How had he started napping so quickly? she marvelled. One moment ago, he'd been gambling about the room, and now he was hogging her bed. Feeling very put out, she resolved to make use of the big human bed upstairs. She climbed the steps again, comforted by the distant humming of the washing devices. Ah, she thought, as she headed back to the big bedroom. It was very peaceful up there. Both meatball and the humans were otherwise occupied now.

She sensed that she was completely alone. With a light spring, she landed on the soft, quilted surface of the exposed mattress. It was so seldom all uncovered like this, and she relished its cushiony bumps. Turning three times, she settled into an enormous silky ball, with her tail over her nose. However, Orgy was not yet to have her nap. Within moments, the lady had appeared. She began talking to Orgy with some sort of nonsense. cocking one ear at the human nearby,

Orgy looked lazily out from underneath half-closed lids and ignored her. But, just a moment later, a huge white sheet floated above Augie's head and then fell upon her, covering the entire bed. Lying very still, Augie waited. This was the most exciting thing that had happened all day. She didn't move a muscle, but she sensed the lady on the other side of the sheet, also immobile.

It was a battle of wills. The human was trying to make her move from the bed, but she underestimated organ, Orgy's ability to blend in and be quiet. Feeling delighted, Augie waited. She won this game in one sense because the lady soon lost her patience and once again pulled the sheet from the bed. But she lost her spot

because she soon found herself being firmly prodded and pushed to the edge until she was forced to stand up, fur rumpled, and get down. With Orgy's spot on the mattress still warm, the lady proceeded to put all the sheets back on the bed, tucking and folding until it looked normal again. This made Orgy feel very grouchy indeed, and she huffed back down the stairs,

hoping Meatball had finished his nap and that she could return to her bed. Alas, her personal retreat was still partly occupied by the orange interloper. Augie approached the bed and stared, hoping the kitten would feel her accusatory presence and leave. He did not. Therefore, there was nothing else to do but climb in with him.

Stepping awkwardly around his sleeping form, Augie dropped heavily on the bed, managing to tuck herself inside after a few earnest attempts. In the end, only her tail trailed off the side. magnificent in its poofy volume. She admired it briefly. It had been a very unusual morning, Morgie thought, as her eyes grew heavy. In his sleep, Meatball purred softly and wiggled,

tucking his nose further under his paws. Orgy looked at the kitten with a familiar mixture of irritation and acceptance. He did at least contribute some heat to their napping spot. In the distance, the floor stick was going whisk, whisk, whisk. The washing devices were going sweet. Swish, swish, swish, and hum, hum, hum. The lady's music was warbling quietly from very far away. The bathroom tap turned on with a shush, and then off again.

chirping very sweetly through the half-opened windows Orgy could hear a happy little bird that said Spring is here With that pleasant thought She was soon asleep In her dreams Little tiny drops danced and caulked and coursed down glass walls, and it was good.

It had been... some time since the coffee pot downstairs had stopped its boisterous gurgling. Even if Augie hadn't had a perfectly accurate sense of time, the coffee pot would have given the hour away. Each morning, it sprang to life, unprompted, at precisely the same moment. In the summer, it would be light-out. when that happened. In the winter, it was still dark. But the coffee pot had garnered Augie's grudging admiration, because it did not depend upon such simple cues. When it was time to get up, it was time to get up. The coffee pot did not accept seasonal excuses.

On most days, the humans were fairly reliable, fetching the finished coffee at the appointed time. However, every few days they stopped getting up on time and lolled about in bed for far too long, leaving their hot coffee to languish in the tall silver pot in the machine. On these mornings, Augie felt miffed on behalf of the sturdy appliance. It seemed a bit rude, really, to ask the pot to make a brew, but not fetch it on time. Worse yet, her breakfast was late on these days as well. And that was the true offence, she thought to herself. She would attempt to move things along.

Stealthily ascending the carpeted stairs, she pushed her way through the partially open door to the room that belonged to the big humans. It was neither summer nor winter, and due to the lateness of the hour, the sun was now streaming into the room with a gentle golden glow. The sash on one of the windows was cracked just a little bit open. It was not far enough for her to fit herself into the window cell, she thought, with regret.

However, she stood on her sturdy legs and rested. her paws there. Outside, the air was cold and crisp. Closing her eyes, she inhaled eagerly, her whiskers twitching. Her senses were flooded with contrasting sense. On the one hand, the air felt so fresh. The plant smells of summer were gone. leaving a clean void in the air. But in their place, she picked up on something else, a dry earthiness. She knew there would be more of that scent if she got out into the garden. Perhaps she would have her chance later.

Tired of balancing on her short back leg, she sat down and turned to face the bed, where the humans were still lying motionless. It wasn't just the humans who were oblivious to the late breakfast time. The furry orange menace, known as Meatball, was out cold on the bed as well. Once a cream puff of a kitten, he was growing fast, where tufts of orange fur and tiny paws had once been,

there were now lanky legs and tall ears. And Meatball was showing a shocking level of entitlement now, even in his sleep. He lay stretched to his full length. Which, even Orgy had to admit, was becoming quite impressive. But worse, he was lying sideways, taking up so much of the middle of the bed that both the man and the lady looked ready to roll off their respective edges. Orgy simmered with quiet annoyance. Not only was he betraying her by sleeping through the breakfast hour,

but he was getting away with an enormous show of impertinence. He really had so little proper catitude, she reflected. Fortunately for Augie, she didn't have to resort to any undignified behavior in order to finally wake the humans. Moments later, one of the small people entered the room, hair standing on end, and poked the man in the shoulder, loudly whispering and waving a handheld device at him.

The man seemed to ignore this for a moment, but the smaller person became quite insistent. Now, waking Meatball, who rolled over and stretched himself even longer than Orgy had thought possible. The man muttered something to the boy in a sleepy voice, and the little person went away. Instantly awake, Meatball bounded off the bed, following in his wake. Orgy knew the younger cat was hoping to be fed but she observed smugly

that the little person wasn't one of the feeders and that meatball was as ever completely clueless instead Orgy stayed behind to complete the work that really needed to be done She walked around to the side of the bed Where the man now lay with his eyes closed again

Willing sleep to return But she was sure it was over for him And when he opened those eyes again She'd be right next to him Issuing her hardest, most judgmental stare and so it was events unfolded exactly as she predicted of course the man opened his eyes and looked at her they locked gazes and then he groaned sat up and pulled on his robe

As he walked down the stairs, she followed at a leisurely distance. Orgy knew he would first pour the coffee and then fill her bowl. She would arrive composed and ready to enjoy her breakfast. It took meatball a few minutes to notice that the small human was. a foolish diversion. By the time the gangly cat had arrived at his bowl, Augie had safely consumed most of her breakfast. She had learned to leave nothing behind, because he was sure to take hers after his own portion was gone. Triumphant, she sushaed how into the living room. She would make her usual visit to the blowing heat vent, and then to the

armchair, where she could observe the morning business of the street. Of course, there were always the silly dogs to see. But this was a particularly good time of year for her to feel superior, because some of them came outside wearing the most ridiculous little jackets. Dogs were too oblivious to realize how undignified they looked, and they gambled about with their usual embarrassing exuberance. Hawke's eyes fell half shut as she almost bored herself to sleep, thinking about them. She was peacefully dozing when some human activity caused her to resurface to wakefulness. There was a flurry of running about and donning of fuzzy sweaters.

The small humans had reached a familiar level of excitement, during which Orgy generally found it wise to stay out of sight. The man and the little ones then trooped down the stairs as the lady human called out commands to them. Then she shook her head and carried a steaming cup of coffee back upstairs. In the distance up above, the television was turned on. Then, Augie heard the digital. Distinctive noise of the sliding glass door in the walk-out basement,

accompanied by a clattering sound and some paper bags crackling. This made her creep in slow motion out of her hiding place under the coffee table. This entire scene was most irregular. She wasn't sure what was happening downstairs, but she had misgivings. Meatball, of course, was not wise enough to be concerned about this break and routine. He went tumbling down the stairs like a foolish lummox. Whatever was happening, he was eager to be. to be part of it.

Orgy sat near the stairs, conflicted. On the one hand, it was her job to know everything about everything in the house. On the other hand, this suspicious activity could create unpleasantness for her. Should she sally forth boldly or hide? The sliding glass door bumped shut. When it did, the loud noises from inside became distant, fragmented noises that drifted in the main floor window, which was also cracked open just a bit. This mysterious turn of events was too much for her to tolerate, so she was.

made her way down the stairs and crossed the walkout basement to see what was going on. There she sat, trapped inside behind the glass door, while the three humans, one big and two small, cavorted in the yard. Worst of all, Meatball was out there with them, and she was not. Augie was aware that there were two types of cats in the world, indoor cats and outdoor cats. She prided herself on having the genius to enjoy the best of both worlds. She was mostly an indoor cat, enjoying comforts such as heat fence, cozy furniture, and a bird bird's-eye view of bad weather outside. But she was also allowed to go into a couple of safe spaces outside the house.

Those two spaces were the deck on the main floor and the small yard below, which was surrounded by a very high wooden fence. Orgy liked this yard because she could enjoy nature there without having to look out for dogs or other annoying invaders. Today it appeared that the people were engaged in tidying up the yard. As Orgy glared through the glass, feeling forgotten, she saw that they were finally gathering all the yellow and brown leaves that had fallen off the maple tree in recent weeks.

Orgy had watched these harbingers of winter flutter down on a daily basis, soaring gaily on their way to the ground. But they did pile up, and when they were lying down there, they obscured her view of the lawn and its busy little creatures. Rabbits and squirrels got away with their activities unobserved, which was, frankly, unacceptable. The people were overdue to rectify this problem.

The man was now using a long pole to push those lines. leaves into a great pile. The older of the little ones was, likewise, struggling with a similar-sized pole. She wasn't making much progress, though, and her cheeks were getting red. The littlest human was really more of a detriment to the process. He kept picking up piles of leaves. between his two hands and walking across the yard, scattering them in new places.

While this was going on, Meatball's lizard brain was in overdrive. He was following the smaller child around the lawn pouncing on leaves that he had dropped. Then, with a total lack of concentration, he would periodically walk to the perimeter of the fence, sniffing things that were invisible. This was his first time experiencing the sights and sounds of the autumn season.

And he was, she thought disapprovingly, quite overwrought. Although she loathed doing it, Orgy was left with no other option. She had to attract the attention of the humans if she wanted to get outside and manage this inefficient process. Shrinking inwardly, she stood up on her hind legs and pressed her immense furry belly and her front paws against the door, letting out a subtle mew. nobody noticed she sat down again for a few seconds and then repeated the posture at this time she went all out

paddling her paws against the door she meowed more loudly this time the older child noticed she dropped her stick and pointed at the door, chattering and laughing. Further insulting Orgy's dignity, the man laughed as well. But he did come to the door and open it. Gathering herself, Orgy haughtily squeezed through the opening,

thinking to herself that the man could have made it just a little wider. Alas, the people did not seem to be very intelligent at times. But even Orgy had a little trouble maintaining her aloofness, and she felt the crisp autumn air fill her lungs. It was a gloriously sunny day. The sky above was a bright, beautiful blue, with barely a cloud in sight. The paving stones of the patio were quite cold under her paws.

She lifted one foot after the other and delicately placed her nose close to the ground. Hopping up on the comparatively warmer wooden border of a nearby garden box, she neatly tucked her paws under her big furry body and wrapped her tail neatly around them. The humans had now raked most of the fallen leaves into one enormous pile, but smaller mountains still lurked around the edge of the yard near the fence. Meatball had become fixated on the parade,

perimeter of the yard, which he was now investigating like a bloodhound. Poking his nose into one area after the other, he was finding the tiny gaps under the fence and then madly poking his paws through them. This created a rustling and crunching of leaves, which excited him even more. Soon his tail was as fluffy as a duster, and he was madly jumping in circles, as if pursuing an invisible foe. Orgy turned away from the sight, mildly embarrassed for him. She squinted up into the gentle autumn sun, which seemed to be more full of. color and warmth.

As she did, a single brave leaf finally let go of the branch it had been clinging to. It sailed in wide swoops, down, down, down, crossing in front of the orb of the sun in her vision. And then it finally came to rest with the others in the big leaf pile. Meatball was distracted from his solo antics when the smaller child went plunging into the big leaf pile. His sister cried out joyfully and within seconds had thrown down her pole and jumped in next to him. The glass door slid open, and the lady human came out, dressed in a sweater.

She spoke to the children in a tone that seemed both gentle and scolding. Orgy knew these tones, because they would speak the gentle one to her when everyone was cuddling. But if she stole food from the counter, the scolding tone would always come out. Humans had a few predictable operational modes, and she knew them all. The big humans exchanged some words, and then the lady took over the moving of the leaves, and the man went inside. The little ones dragged themselves, out of the pile and began reassembling it with their hands.

Meanwhile, the lady opened two of the paper bags and began pushing leaves inside one, while the other tipped over nearby. Orgy knew immediately what she needed to do. Moving smoothly around the edge of the planter, she hopped down into the young, and trotted to the opening of the empty bag. It smelled so clean and papery inside.

As she prepared to squeeze herself in there, she rubbed the side of her face on its sturdy edges. She would leave her mark on this bag before Meatball could lay claim to it. Having moved entirely inside, she turned around with some awkwardness and settled into a crouching loaf position. The small humans uttered cries of delight, and the moon face of the older child appeared in the opening, blocking the light. Orgy stared at the girl, unblinking, as the face of the face. in the bag opening, chattered nonsense.

Then the little child appeared, too, squeezing out half of his sister's face, and they both made cooing noises. Thankfully, they soon got bored with this game and went away to push leaves around once more. The sliding glass door opened again, and the man's voice could be heard announcing something. The little ones exclaimed with happiness, and the rustling of the leaves stopped.

Augie was plagued with the need to understand what was going on, so she peered out of the bag. She saw that the people were standing around some of the garden furniture, with steaming cups. Augie recognized the scent of the drinks on the breeze. It was the same smell that came from their mugs at night when they sat in front of the fire or while they were playing with their pieces on the big flat board.

While the humans were drinking from their cups, a movement caught her eye. Up atop the fence, she spotted a squirrel. It ran along one side of the yard with a hippity hop and then froze. It could have been a statue, except for a single tail twitch every few seconds. Orgy was motionless. She knew in her heart that she couldn't reach the top of the fence. She feared that the squirrel knew that too, but she couldn't show any weakness.

Too often, these squirrels trespassed up on the deck while she was trapped inside the house. They flaunted their advantage. openly digging in the flower boxes and generally having the run of the place. But this time, Orgy was outside too. The cheekiness would not stand. As if, hearing her thoughts, the squirrel turned ever so slightly and appeared to stare Orgy right in the eye. Then, in an intolerable show of defiance, it nibbled lightly on an acorn it was carrying in its mouth. Just then, Meatball came out of nowhere, gripping the fence post and climbing energetically toward the top.

The squirrel broke out of its pose and hopped into the tree. zipping effortlessly to the top and chattering the entire way. Meatball realized at that moment that he was not going to make it all the way up, and he descended with an ungainly tumble. But the rodent had lost the game, and that was all that mattered. Orgy feigned indifference, but she was secretly smug. Perhaps Meatball could be useful as part of the feline team, she admitted to herself.

Having banished the squirrel, Meatball went crashing through the leaf pile and hopped up on the table, where the family were finishing their drinks. A chorus of scolding went up. They said, no meatball, and Meatball, get down. And the smallest child began a fit of loud giggling, as Meatball sniffed at his cup. This party crashing seemed to come at a good time. The man took the cups inside,

and the children ran after him. They had clearly lost interest in the autumnal labour in the backyard. The lady shook her head and resumed piling leaves into bags. Accordingly, Orgy was soon evicted from her hideaway inside the paper sack. The lady gently tipped the bag until Orgy slid. onto the browning grass of the lawn, feeling somewhat miffed. But Orgy's mood soon lifted, as a fresh autumn breeze once again brightened her senses. Meatball had resumed his examinations of the fence perimeter, but most of the leaves had been

cleaned up, and he found little of interest in the nooks and crannies of the small backyard. The man returned, sliding the door gently open, and together the big humans lugged the two bags of leaves around to the front of the house. Orgy knew from experience that a big truck would come at the appointed time tomorrow. and growl loudly as it swallowed the paper totes. She would be watching from her armchair to make sure it was done properly. Setting an example for her young friend, Augie sauntered back into the house,

squeezing and pushing just a little to fit through the gap in the door. Meatball noticed quickly that he was alone in the yard. Since he obviously had no capacity to entertain himself like a normal cat, he launched himself easily through the same gap, landing in the comparatively warm room inside. All this fresh air had made Augie very tired. She slowly ascended the stairs as meatball bounded past her. She was in no hurry.

He would learn soon enough that a cat's day was not meant to be a race against time. In fact, she reflected with pleasure, she was looking forward to a long nap in her cat bed. She felt optimistic that there would be a sunbeam on it right about now. And there it was, precisely as she had imagined. All pillowy soft and warm-looking. Just then, a light humming sound indicated to her that the heat had started. started coming out of the vents. The small humans were ensconced on the couch in the family room.

She could hear the chattering of the box on the wall, showing them their usual entertainment. Downstairs, distantly, she could hear the big humans closing up the doors and removing their shoes. It was time for everyone to rest. Orgy prodded her bed experimentally with her paws and then stepped into it. She turned two or three times before dropping heavily, right in the center. In the next room, She could hear meatball, lapping at the water fountain. He had worked up a mighty thirst, apparently. A light wind rattled the windowpane.

In the narrow view afforded by her half-closed eyes, Augie saw cheerful dust motes dancing in the sunbeam that illuminated the carpet around her. But then, just as she was drifting off, Meatball silently appeared, sniffing at her bed. She refused to acknowledge him. This was her bed, and there was no room for a growing cat like Meatball.

He would have to find somewhere else but meatball as ever wanted to cuddle. Unable to find a way into the bed, he laid himself down in the sunbeam and rested his chin on the edge of the pillowy soft cushion, gazing adoringly at Orgy. Then, tentatively, he laid his paw across her belly and closed his eyes.

Morgie pretended to ignore him, but she decided this napping arrangement was satisfactory. As her eyelids drooped, the sunbeam vanished from her sight. Instead, she saw a thousand falling leaves. Yellow, brown, orange. They sailed through the air gently in a strange dance, and they descended with her as she sank happily into a deep sleep. You know,

I'm going to be able to be. You know, I'm going to be able to be. ...you know... ...that... ...that... ...the... ...the...

You know, the We're going to be. So, you know, ...their... ...that... ...their...

...that... ...that... So, I'm going to be able to be. I'm going to be able to be. You know, I'm going to be the ...withal... ...and...

...their... ...that... ...the... So, you know, the We're going to be. So,

you know, ... ... ... ... ... ... ...

... ... ... So, you know, You know, you know, So,

you know, ...that... ...this... ...that... ...that... ...that... I don't know. I'm going to be.

You know, I'm going to be. So, you know, the We're going to be able to be. You know, I'm going to be the

You know, I'm going to be the You know, You know, Thank you.