Giggly Squad - Giggling about an emergency press conference

Episode Date: June 26, 2026

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Sup Gigglers. Gary, fix the Wi-Fi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed. Got away from me? You guys, I have to have an emergency press conference right now. I can't believe this is happening. I cannot.

No, I believe. I'm in shock. I've been going through something. And it's not funny. And it's not funny. It hasn't been funny. I haven't laughed. about it one. Page has been getting a kick out of my life, which you know what, if that's the one

joy that we get out of this. I'll just let it, I'll let it, I'll let it go, I'll let it go. This is me now. This is me. Is this the equivalent of like your friend mispronounces a word forever for the rest of your guys? And it's not funny. So, okay, so start from the top. We'd start from the beginning. Yeah. And one thing I do want to say about Gigli Squad is we'd love to say that we live and we learn, but we don't. We don't.

We don't learn from each other's mistakes. We don't learn from our own mistakes. And this is supposed to be a forum where we talk about our shared experiences so that other people can relate or not relate. And we learn collectively. And as the host of the show, we haven't learned a goddamn thing. Not a god damn thing. Now one thing about the gigglers is they know me better than anyone, better than my own, almost my own mother who betrayed me last week.

Yeah. Also, the hardest part about this was not telling the gigglers like every second of the street. It actually was driving me insane. We had a call about it. We had a little call about it. We had to cut like moments of the past two pods where I like started talking about it. But we, I'm like, I can't hold it. it anymore.

Two weeks ago, I innocently went to get Masseter Disport for my TMJ. You guys know me. I don't do Botox. I, however, have gotten Master Botox twice. You guys know that. And I went to a new place. Was it a Groupon?

No. But was it what I've probably done? more research if it was groupon was it under the umbrella of groupon some would say it had the same energy was it convenient and i didn't look up anything yes so i get there and i'm like i'd love to get some botox and the lady was like what did you get last time and i was like whoa i'm not a woman in stem like i don't yeah i have no idea what happened my chart because i don't know and she was like we don't do charts here. And I was like, of course you don't. No, but she was like, is it disport? Is it Zulmin? Is it? I was like, I literally have no idea. I'm not a Botox girlie. I just, I clench my teeth

really bad and I wake up with headaches sometimes because, you know, I'm a woman of the arts and I, God forbid someone has a little anxiety around here. A little trauma. And I, I, some people have it in their hips. I do too, but it's also in my jaw. And I did not know there were risks to this procedure. I've never heard of a risk I didn't even know this could happen So she uses Disport and she was kind of messing around A little too long back there

Like you know when they're like making it I guess And I remember something in my soul was like Get out of here You had a gut feeling 34 years old the people please are on me She's still strong Even though no one's really pleased with me She's still working hard

And I remember thinking like What could go wrong? She's just like what your masters are a little too weak whatever she puts it in we're great we're key king thank you so much love you bye i'm going to the u.s open golf a couple days later by the way i'm great living life actually one of the highest moments of my life probably things are going well nice my friendships are great my family's healthy and great besides grandpa and everything is working my career's doing well and I was like yeah you're gonna have a spectacular summer we truly are and I wake up that

morning and I try to smile and it it feels kind of tight and I thought I had like dry skin or something and I so I put lotion on like maybe I have dry skin yeah it's so weird so then I do this interview and I'm like still feeling kind of weird and then I'm like oh my god is it possible that the poison that was injected in my face is now going to ruin my face. Would this be the repercussions of my own actions? In real time. And it's a very humbling experience. No. So then two days go by. I call Paige. She's like, well, what was your experience? I was just in shock that you would just do this on a whim. Go to like a new place randomly on a I like shock you?

Kind of? Because like I, you want to know what? I look at you as my shepherd. Like you're leading. And so once you've gone astray, I'm like. But I'm not leading you in any beauty type stuff. No, but you do lead in like. Sanity.

Yeah. Don't do that. That's wrong. Well, I was arguably getting a medical procedure done. It was not. Not cosmetic. It was literally medical. And I did not know this.

I literally did not know this could happen. So I call Paige. Actually, it was really funny. Do the smile. Let's like really take a looksy and a gander at what we're dealing with. This is as much as I could smile, you guys. And don't screenshot that page. So how dare you?

I swear to God. I swear to God. And also, you guys, Guys, don't make me the face of Botox mishaps. I love my natural face. I love my natural movements. And I remember telling the lady, I was like, by the way, I do on camera stuff because I'm humble, you know, I'm not like, by the way, my podcast is, you know, very popular.

They don't care. I said it's on camera. I really need my face to move. She's like, yeah, it's Botox. It just, disport helps with the tension of your jaw. So I call the lady who did it. And she's like, hey, how you. you're all doing and I was like I'm kind of freaking out the smile is kind of shorter than it should be

it's a bit wonky it's a bit wonky it's not for me love it's not for me so she a sweet sweet sweet girl first she was like it's going to get better don't worry like it'll get better and let me just preface we would never shame the girls who did this to us also a girl's never done anything wrong it was our choice. So this sweet girl, it was her birthday. But she, in the beginning, it actually wasn't this bad. I just was like, I feel like something's off. And she was like, yeah, don't worry. Just like smile a lot or whatever. I was like, cool, cool. So then I told her just in like two weeks, do you think it would be better because I actually have a huge job coming up in Toronto that I'm super excited about and she was like why didn't you tell me that she was like two weeks it's gonna peak

babe but also i was like sorry i didn't give you my resume like i don't know like you should always assume the person's face needs to work yeah is important in this in this equation yeah and she was like so it's a day i'm like it's three weeks of a gig so she starts freaking out it's the last person you want freaking out i'm basically like what can i do and she's like try to smile a lot So then I go to a girl in West Hampton and she's like, look, and I've looked all over in line. She's like, you have to wait it out, but I will try to put saline solution in your face. So then I go and get saline solution injected all in my face. Yeah.

Did that help? I don't think so. Okay. Now, mind you, intermittently, I'm getting face times where Hannah is giving me different facts at one point. she says, did you know that it's scientifically studied? If you can't smile, you will go into a depression. So guys, this is the mental fatigue. At one point she goes, I went back to the podcast when this happened to you and I listened more closely. I go, okay, good to know when I was going through something, you were like, yeah, yeah, your vein, get over it. So I go to Pilates. Just trying to

live a normal life. And I was kind of in hiding in West Hampton, but I go to Pilates. And I go to Pilates. And my Pilates instructor is laughing at me, but I'm like, whatever. So I'm about to start my Pilates class. And the girl next to me is like, psal. Ooh, that was hard for me. I just lost the muscle. Something just like fell off. I go, she was, and I was like, and I was like, hey, and she's like, I'm a giggler.

And I'm like, nice to meet you. And then I looked in the mirror because it looks like I was looking at her like, you fucking freak. Like, why would you talk to me? So we're like about to start. And I'm like, by the way, I just got weird. master Botox, I can't smile. I'm not being rude.

I swear. And she's like, no problem, no problem. After the show, a bunch of, after the show. Like, no problem, you fucking bitch. No, I'm literally like, nice to meet you. Thanks for listening to my podcast. And this is what's insane is I'm low-key, the smileiest person ever. Like, I would get-smiliest.

I would get made fun of as a kid for like always giggling, always smiling. To the point that, like, I smile too much. I've never been more aware. I love a mercy smile, a fake laugh. You're a nervous smile. I'm a nervous laugher. I smile and laugh for everything. So then after the class, a bunch of gigglers came up to me and I'm trying to navigate it.

But in my head, I can't process what they're saying because I'm thinking that they think that I'm being like not cool with them. A freak. A freak. So then I tell all of them. But now I'm like, I feel like Lindsay Lohan and me girls. I'm like, I can't stop talking about it. So like everyone at all I'm like, by the way, I even know.

And then the polite structure threw me in the sauna and I'm just like in the sauna, just like alone with my thoughts, Googling it. And people are like, this happened to me. And I couldn't smile for six months. And I was in the darkest place in my life. It's really, it is. It's very humbling. I try not to look at the comments really ever because I don't like when comments like affect our creativity. But, um, right.

I was like, let me just check the giggly YouTube to see if people are on to me. Yeah. And there was one person that was like literally no shade no tea love Hannah something's going on Someone responded and was like no shade no tea don't speak about women's bodies She's probably going through something it could be anxiety Like she's going through really hard time like you just froze your face in anxiety Like you're so nervous you can't move But someone was so sweet they were like please you don't know what Hannah's going through or why

And I said period and that's valid there was more things like guys this is fucking weird and then I'm I'm a talker like when something's worrisome to me or I'm stressed about something I need to talk about it so I'm I feel like this is therapeutic for me because I've been I've been hiding because I've been trying to fix it and I also leave tonight for one of the bigger gigs of my life for three weeks in Toronto hosting a TV show now are there a ton of comedians who don't smile. Yes. A lot of male comedians.

Some stern female comedians. Are there a lot of celebs who get too much Botox and their face doesn't move? Yes. I have to navigate the next three weeks. The good news is I think after three weeks, it'll loosen up a little bit. I have a very high metabolism. Yes, you do. I do.

And we know that you have short-term muscles. What are they? I have fast-switch muscles. Fast rich muscles. Also, there's levels to this because now you guys realize I went to see my mom because I was in a dark place. And thank God for my family this weekend, they literally... Wait till my dad hears about this. Gary's going to fucking kill me.

But low-key, like, I look so good, magging. Yeah. I did point out at one point. I was like, your career... occupation is comedian just throwing that out there so like smiling is a prerequisite and part of the gig unless you're you're sarcastic right and some would say I'm funnier when I when I don't laugh in my own jokes which you know is my favorite thing to do yeah I mean that's why I wake up in the morning literally the only thing I do um but it it is getting better I think yeah

you think it's better as from the last pod we did so the other night i think i worded it as it's different okay it's not as your your lip your top lip at one point was really going up yeah it was going really high yeah it's definitely widened which makes me think that these their muscles are kind of like chilling out a little bit because we want it to be wider Sorry, I'm so depressed right now. I actually was like, just breathe. And this is the thing. When stuff like this happens to in your life,

it's not about what happens to is how you react to it. And have I reacted to a great? No. Have I been pushing people away because I can't stop talking about it and have I been up all night on Reddit trying to find people who have experienced the same thing and actually not finding that many situations. This is extremely rare what's happening to me. I don't know why it happened to me. But then I think of a picture. I don't have cancer. I thought you were going to say I don't have

kids. It's like, okay. That's a good turd. Butter is alive. Yep. I still have my brain. I'm tan right now. And it's, this is temporary. Yes. Wait, tell them what your mom said. She was like, are you okay? And I'm like, this is me smiling. Oh, no, she goes, maybe don't, maybe don't smile. Just don't smile. But it also makes me realize how, like, I feel like if I was a man, this wouldn't affect me as much.

I feel like men go, I was even watching some, like, male basketball podcasts and, like, none of them smile. They all just kind of, like, talk shit. And, like, no one's, they don't really laugh at each other that much. And I'm like, I just have to pretend I'm like a male podcaster. They don't have his best. much criticism. Well, women are always, it's like, smile, smile, be pleasant, smile. But I'm also interacting with like Uber drivers and everyday life. Everyday life. And I'm like buying something at

the store and I'm like, they think I'm a bitch. Bitch. The good news is my speech is like improving. Me and Hannah were straight up role playing last night because I was like, okay, give me a monologue and I won't look at you and let me see if it sounds different and you sounded great. Thank you. When I enunciate and speak slower. Yes. So anyway, the reason I went to hang out with my parents this last weekend was for emotional support and thank God they were there for me. They were amazing. But that's why my mom was like, maybe you come watch me do the national anthem.

And I was like, I need to get out of the house. Like, I have to stop ruminating about this. And that's why when I was running and going through all that torture, there was like other levels to it that I was upset about. Mind you, I posted the photo of the 5K My mom tricked me into running, which will post on the YouTube or Apple video if you get it. Everyone was mad about my shoes. Oh, honey, I didn't even see them.

Everyone was mad about my shoes. They were my Cocoa Golf tennis shoes that it wore because I thought we were walking to the race. Also, yes, I was holding two Arizona iced teas and a banana because they were free. Who's mad about two Arizona iced teas and a banana? That sounds like anytime someone says Arizona iced tea.

I'm in. Yeah. I'm coming. Yeah. Arizona iced tea. I've never had a bad time. Never finished one. Do you know how fucking big some of them are?

Mass. They're huge. Like bazookas. So that's why I also look so miserable because I can't smile. So it was like it was a lot. But I do have to say, even though I've made fun of my mom so much, she's been my rock in all of this. And Eleanor has been very, very.

great about it. Like, because you know when you're, you don't want to stress other people out, you know? See, when I was going through this, I was like, everyone should be at the same exact stress level I'm at because this is a code red people. We have a serious problem on our hands. This is emergency press conference code red. I need the gigglers love and support more than ever right now. You know what they say?

Like something bad happens to your life and like the world just keeps spinning and like people just keep going about their days. That's how I felt. I was like, guys, how are you waking up and going to work? I can't move my mouth. No, well, it's crazy also. And that's, I have like a high thought, but like how you can experience life so differently. Like my life right now is literally just me navigating my smile.

And that's all I care about. That's all I think about. When I talk to someone, I look at their smile. And you guys, it's like when you have a cold and you're like, I would give anything to be able to breathe through my nostril right now. Yeah. That's how I feel. I'm like, if I could smile again, I don't. I don't care.

But then I... It's humbling and it puts life into perspective. I truly think it was like a sign from God to both of us. Like, don't do it. I told you not to do it. You guys went and did it. And it's not for you. I don't think it's for us because I think there is this larger plan that we are like

amazing actresses and we must be able to move our face. We must. We must. We must. Also, I was, I was. afraid I put a hex on myself because the next one. Sometimes I feel like people like siphon my energy and they get the outcome that I actually deserve.

This is like out of some karmic shit you did because you know I've been clean. Okay. So now I'm getting blamed for your karma. Okay. Because I don't have enough of my own to deal with. No, we are fully connected right now. We're both on our periods. Like we are the same thing.

Wait. Hannah and I also literally, Hannah got her period last. saying I got mine this morning. So this is insane. Guys, for the first time ever, I got my period on a red eye. What does that mean? Nothing. Wait, I went to my astrologer today. Did you talk to them? Yeah, I did. What they say about my smile. Oh yeah, you're a fuck. He started it out saying, everyone goes into nine years cycles. The hardest years are year two and year seven. You are currently in your year seven. And I was like, perfect.

But I feel like you've been having a good year. I feel like I have been too. And he was like, but I rather you be in your bad year now because it's like, it's like coming. It's almost over because next year is like the best and most amazing year for you. And I was like amazing. And he was like, your manifestation powers next year off the charts. He recorded it and he sends it to you. And I'll put his name in our newsletter.

it was transformational it was one of the best readings because i haven't had a reading with him in six years he goes the last time i talked to was 2020 and i was like which is crazy because it feels like yesterday and everything he said in that reading like happened he was like how motivated were you like months after we talked and i was like my career completely changed and i broke up with my boyfriend but he was like it was one of the most transformation things that you needed to go with go through to like get this motivation. Did you learn anything else new? I learned that, um, who did I learn?

You actually, $500 later. I have to re-listen because you like black out when you're doing it because it's so much information. Here's the thing. Sometimes when you're going to like psychics or mediums or astrologers, you have to like come up with your own questions and whether you're doing it for like 30 minutes or an hour. This guy,

I'm not kidding. This guy talked for one full hour. He was like, stop me at any time. You have questions. Is he also like a medium? Or he's just reading your chart? Astrologer.

He's reading my chart. Astrologer. I'm trying to think of like certain. He just said like certain things about my. Not one thing about me. Nothing about partnerships. Nothing about business partnerships. Nothing about giggles.

Nothing about smiles. Um. Disport. Yeah. He did say that like next year because it's my man. manifestation year. It's just like everything I've ever want, which is like giggly. He did say things about like giggly squad this year.

I'm going to have to offline about something. I have to relisten because I blacked out during it. Sorry, I put you on the spot. I put you on the spot. Also, it's HIPAA. Like that was crazy of me. Also, you know, like that was a doctor's appointment. That was insane.

Like we talked about my fertility. That was insane. He said that there was one unique thing in my chart because he was like, yeah, typically I can see when motherhood, like where there's a gas. in a chart that would mean like that's when you're starting to have kids he was like because motherhood is like such a strong part of your existence and like your chart you can start you have free range to start and stop whenever you want because once you start it's your whole life like it's your you're he was like it's actually the first time you ever feel fulfilled no I'm gonna wait that's a

sad thing I've ever heard. He also said it's the first time I ever feel like my love is going to like something worthy of it. And I'm like, so Scorpia. You are so, no, I'm going to cry. You're going to love your baby so much. Not as much as Daphne, but like, you will. You will. So anyway, there is that. He did say there were three different spots where I could get married. And one was in 10 years. And I was like, clip. Goodbye. Bye, bye. I actually want to book him. And he'll be like, can you please stop asking me about how long disport lasts?

He does like, what's going on this year? What's happening this like next three months? And then like what's happening next year for you? Anyways, I honestly feel like I have a huge monkey off my back. Just telling the gigglers, I feel lighter than ever. But I need everyone. I've turned to religion. I've turned fully to religion.

I need everyone to pray to St. Anthony. You want to know what it is? To find my smile. It's your karma from last pod when you said you were agnostic and God said, oh, really? I think you'll be praying to me soon, bitch. I'm fully religious. I'm Mormon. I believe in Joseph White or whatever, salamanders.

I believe in it all and I need the power of prayer. I need the nuns, the sister nuns. Hi sisters. Hi sister. And you're so good at that sister. Please, please pray. Are nuns allowed to get bowed? sucks i'm sure there i'm sure there's nothing in the bible against it but it seems like a material

item that they wouldn't care about um i saw this video today and it was this mom asking her daughter a question and i want to see like what your initial answer is to it because i had my initial answer while i was watching it and she asked her if a guy came up to you and asked to ask you for help lifting something into his car, what would you say? A stranger? Yeah, what's your initial thought? Hell no. Yeah.

Nope. When he says, hey, can you help me lift this into my car? Well, okay, there's a lot of scenarios. When in New York City, if a man like even says, like, can I have the time or whatever, I'm like, no, thank you. I just say no, thank you. Like, I don't want to be kidnapped. Okay, let's say it's not New York City walking down the street because you're right.

is like. So this is like a neighborhood thing? Let's say you're in a parking lot. I say so sorry. I'm running late. So sorry. I'm running late. So sorry.

I'm running late. Also just broke my hand. Okay. That's so funny. My hand's broken. Sorry. My first, I think the little girl said like you don't have arms that work.

Oh, period. Slay. But my initial reaction was I just froze my eggs. I can't lift anything. The first thing I thought. Sorry, I have a doctor's note, actually, and I can't. Sorry, I just got my period on a red eye. Also, I'd be so real with you, I would help him because I'm like not cool.

Like, I would be like, sure. And then I'd be like, we'd be like, I'd be like, is there a head in that bag? And then I'd be like, can't we just help this on Giggly Squad? It's going to be so crazy. But you, I think maybe you're helping because you didn't grow up in the suburbs where you didn't have to think. No, you grew up in New York City. What am I saying?

you had way more dangers. Oh, no, dangers everywhere. I, if it, I would try to get the vibe. But also,

like, I'll fight. Like, I'd be like, I'd love to, I'd love to fight this man right now. Well, because when I saw the video,

I was, I had a, uh, memory of my mom used to do that to me all the time when I was younger. Like, if we ever went, yes,

if we ever went shopping, just the two of us, which like, that was all the time but if we like left the mall and the sun was down and we were walking to our car before we would leave the mall she would get her keys out put them in between her finger and say okay you have to be alert i mean this started from like five years old you have to be alert when you're in a parking lot you can like you have to i mean this was before phone so this definitely didn't like help your anxiety though but continue she's you know you take on the nervous system of

your mother and let me tell you parking lots are not good for us she became fully wolverine kim wolvering she was if someone comes up to you you say absolutely not like she would grab my hand like with her other hand and she'd be like you just have to get to the car you open the door you don't talk to any like it was very much a routine there's a crazy story about my papa in brooklyn in like the 50s I guess and there's a story about he said he was walking down the subway and some guy was walking up and he didn't like how the guy was looking at him like he felt like the guy was going to like rob him or something something so he broke his nose and I I was like Papa I feel like there were steps like what if the guy actually like what if he got weird Botox in his eye and

that's what he looked like and he was like well I didn't want to find out I'm like is that the other day I'm in Albany. I'm going on a walk in a park. My parents walk in a park. I'm with my mom. My brother's girlfriend were like walking all next to each other. This guy, there's also like buildings around this park that are like convention center like some like random whatever. This guy like is coming around the corner from one of the buildings.

But he's walking at me with a swift pace and I couldn't see his hand and his hand looked weird. and I like was looking over my shoulder like every two seconds because I didn't he was like really coming close whatever passes me and like keeps going and I just like looked around and I was like guys did anyone else think he was coming to stab me? Also I love though you're like he was trying to stab me like not all of you guys like don't be jealous. What guy? I go that guy looked like he was coming up from behind me and was going to stab me in the side. eyes and ears stay alert the only person that came to my defense who was behind me was my brother who said i saw that guy i was watching him i said because he looked like he had a knife i do think that growing up in new york city there's so many crazy people running around like like just

with knives all the time that you're just kind of like they're just wielding them you're just wielding knives at you know 7 a m on a tuesday in times square and you're just kind of like just stay alert um And, but I've gotten myself in a lot of stupid situations. One more thing that I just remembered about my astrologist. He said that your three signs also have attached like child, teenager adult. And this was like when people say like, oh, I have an old soul. That like really does mean something like you could legit have an old soul. All three of mine are adult.

And he was like, you really don't like nonsense. And he also said like there's no part of me that's like a baby. So like I'm never a cry baby. If there's any time where I'm like feeling bad for myself or feel like a baby, I snap out of it immediately because I'm like, get over it. I'm kind of obsessed with you being born and you're like, I don't do that wah, wah, shit. Well, he goes, were you really mature as a child?

And I was like, I literally was like, I'm not playing outside. That's for kids. I have business to do. I'm a business woman. I literally created a fake company. You're like, sorry, don't do choice time. I have meetings. I was like, I'm not playing house.

I have a board meeting in the living room. Get it to get like, what? It was called teeter totter company. And I ran it. Like I. That's so funny. That's so interesting. Yeah, that's so, so interesting.

Like, because like some people will always identify as children. Yeah. And I don't. Do you know what's weird and this isn't a brag? Because I really think, like, me and you both need to cry more. I haven't cried once during this experience. I think more because I deal with self-hate more than sadness. So I've more just been angry at myself.

I've just been like, you stupid, stupid dumb bitch. Host of the podcast Giggly Squad deals with self-hate. I guess it's not all giggle. Well, no one was admit. mental health pod because we don't market it that way we don't market it that way because that'll scare people because everyone no one wants to talk about their mental health we're out here doing it i did see something that upset me we were talking about Javier Bardem yes he's shooting a movie like making out with Kate Hudson all over New York City right now I don't know how actors do it

let's talk about it like if I was Penelope Cruz and I saw Kate Hudson who we love by the way my other bestie all over my husband pretending to be in love i'm like that you guys are all in fake relationships you're all cheaters you're all in open relationships and just being like oh i'm just pretending to make out with him it's not real i'm just pretending if i had a nickel and you know me i'm a trustworthy person i'm not i don't think everyone's cheating like i always believe people absolutely not yeah how would you deal with your man having a three weeks where he's just like in love with Kate Hudson making out kissing. No.

And he goes, babe, this is my job. No. Let's do role play. I'm literally getting emotional and annoyed. You're not going to. I went to France to study acting to get this role with this amazing director. And I need to. Yeah, it happens to be Kate.

Kate and I are friends. Kate and I are just friends. when I say I think all people are cheating, I don't really mean that. I do. I think there are more professions that lead and lend itself to cheating. Like, okay, if you're a professional athlete, nine times out of ten,

I kind of think you're cheating or you have cheated or whatever. If you're an A-less actor, yeah, I think that like maybe you probably have also. I think it has to be something that it's such a unique situation that has to be talked about. way before you get married. I mean, the only thing is, is that they're both actors. So they both have this brain and have been in situations where they have to do this.

So I don't think they see it. Here's the other thing. We've never been in a situation where we've been in a movie or a television show where we're making out someone. I, just like everything else, I imagine that it becomes so mundane and analytical in terms of the shot and works. I think they're a bunch of little freaks. See, I don't, I think in some situations, yes. But I think the majority of the time, it is really work. Like if he came home every night being like, oh, fucking Kate, she's so annoying.

I actually think that's a red flag. Oh, he's overcompensating. I think if he's coming home and complaining about someone, I actually don't like that. I'm playing chess. Checkers, you're playing chess. I'm like, wait, she's like this much in your head. that you like have feelings of dislike toward her you should feel nothing oh you're you should feel nothing period you should feel nothing guys write that down yeah no my man is not coming home from work and telling me some story about some woman that like is i think we're both correct in this

and that yeah as always it's just if because there's been multiple movies that people fall in love like brad and angelina um also i did like one shoot with like like a male model for tennis and we had to like be like smiling at each other and like there was like five minutes and I was like is that my husband that's the equivalent of like an airport crush yeah it's like because in the moment and it's gonna be over soon and I don't actually have to know this person because he is probably a loser freak but like right now he's hot and he's my husband in the airport but that's why you cheat because you're like I have a full family at home this guy seems fun also page you did all those like romantic covers for like novels did you ever have like I mean I know you're like 16 but like

were there other teenage boys that you had to like take photos with you know what no I never did any modeling with boys that was in your contract Kim put that in the contract no yeah oh you know what there used to be this one store I don't even know if it's a store still it was called bob's like department store Bob's not Bob's discount furniture no different because it sold clothes and i remember i had like a week long shoot in new york and there was a boy my age i have no idea what his name is i could never even tell you what i looked like but of course i had a crush on him yeah of course we had to hold hands i had never held hands before i said yeah and you're mine now basically yeah and then i grew up and i said that in a scene um

do you think penelope cruz is at home being like she's black kate's blonde so he's He's not. I know for a fact that Penelby Cruz is actually acting right now and in like a romance of her own that she's acting. Like they're both doing the same thing. That's their job. You know the character of the person that you're marrying. You know deep down in your gut if they're going to cheat on you or not, I feel like.

And I also feel like you know, maybe because I'm just crazy intuition wise, you know when something's off. I just also think people in Hollywood are inherent. like super insecure because they have to have they have to be famous and have people think they're amazing so like that doesn't bode well for like having a relationship where the person's constantly making out with other a list actresses or actors i love the word bode actually i'm obsessed that i said i've never said that before my life no like i'm sick i love that like bode well it's just like that could be the name of your son bode bode bode Wait, you know what I want you to name your daughter?

And you know what it is, but you won't do it. What? Ryan. Oh, that's his middle name. I want a girl named Ryan. I know. And so it goes so well for your family. I like the name like Stevie and Scotty and like Frankie for girls.

But I don't want them to have to be like, my name's Francine, but call me Frankie. Like I'm really obsessed with them not having to waste like those. seconds of their life constantly. You know what I think about a lot? We're at the age now where like our friends are naming kids. We're thinking about kids names. Like kids are around. We're at the age.

When I was younger, I would always think like, oh my God, when it's time for me to name my kids, am I not going to be able to pick this name because I know someone this name? And like, now I'm at the age and I'm like, yeah, I could never name a baby that. because I cringe at just the like sound of it. No, it's bad because especially when you've like dated a bunch of guys, they ruin every baby name for you. Yeah. Because then next thing you know, you're like, okay, now it reminds me of the guy who used to yell at his grandma.

Like now, like I can't just enjoy the name. There was a baby name that I thought was so cute and I like always love this name. Yeah. And I don't know. I was like dating someone. and I like went through his phone or something and he was like texting a girl with this name. And I was like, I was like, I ruined my baby name. I remember being so pissed.

I was like, no, because I. And then I was like, no, I'll forget about it. I'll forget about it. No. I didn't forget it. Also, I date guys with names that I like. Like, I don't date guys with weird ass names. So like literally every good name I've fucking, I fucked.

Well, what are we supposed to just? be out here changing men's names. But then it's like, what if I have a son? And then that guy's like, wow. She's obsessed with me. She named my son, her son after me. Trying to think if I've ever dated someone with like a weird name. Oh.

Yeah. Do you know I dated someone one time named Desmond? Yeah. How have you never told me that? I feel like I have. I was in college. Wait, did you date my husband? No.

Is this where you drop it on me? He was Irish. I dated for like a summer. Like when I tell you it was like the girliest college summer fling ever, it was like... Did he have an Irish accent? No. But he had like blue eyes, brown hair. He would like come to the door and like ring the door about to pick me up for dinner.

Oh my God. It was like a real summer fling. I think I was like 20. So cute. Anyway. Wise can every week. Like what? Everyone all of a sudden I one day I woke up and everyone was just like in can you didn't come to can I'm like what where did every where what's everyone do? Surely not everyone needs to be there also it's not like next door these I'm like you guys going across the world for a panel this is a lot this is a lot you could do virtual you know you could do a zoom I feel like I see something about can and I'm just like no no no but also can they just had the

film festival now they're doing like an advertising festival everything's a festival there's a lot of festivals which are better than parades i will say i just want to end here because i have been doing some like thoughts and reflection and if there's one thing about me i like to acknowledge when i've changed my minds because i think it's important to let women know that it's okay to change your mind that's what growing and expanding and that's what life is all about and so i do think that there are certain situations where it is okay to say one thing and do the other. And I think there are situations where it's okay to be hypocritical. The more I think about it, the more I really put some thought into it, I actually kind of love that Taylor Swift's getting married at Madison Square Garden.

I thought you were going to say you're getting Botox. Wait, so it's official. She's getting married. No, I mean, I think so. That's like what the chatter has been. Why not? Have some whimsy. She's in the heart of New York City, arguably the best city in the entire fucking world. The energy just alone on that day will be so insane. I feel like that's like good karma. Madison Square Garden, she's performed there. It was probably a major highlight of her career the first time she ever sold out Madison Square Garden.

It's iconic. People from all over the fucking world know what Madison Square Garden is. The security detail would be so top notch. Not a single paparazzi would be able to get a photo or even get close to getting into the building. I think that's probably a massive piece of mind for her. Surely she has to think about people trying to like legit come and like. What are they going to do about the ice rink? No, that I don't know.

And then the other thing is she is a billionaire. So she has the capacity to hire. Do anything she wants. Do anything. She could make it look like a literal, completely different place in there. She better invite the whole next team. I think she will.

That's the other thing. People are like she's inviting a thousand people. I kind of feel like that might be like a lie. I actually think it will be like a normal sized wedding. I heard that there's a lot of people being invited. Like really? It's going to be like a crazy spectacle and I think good for her like lean in. Have fun.

Do your thing. I'm exhausted. Like I'm exhausted. I love it like halfway through. She's like, we should have just elope this kind of fucking crazy. Yeah. I mean, just personally, the older I get, if I like think about like what my wedding could potentially be, I do feel like it gets chiller and chiller.

Oh, for sure. For sure. You're like, let's do a brunch. Like, I really do just think about my outfits. As long as I have enough things to change outfits, then I'm like, I don't really. Your wedding day is going to be you doing a photo shoot for three fucking hours, different backgrounds. I do have some type of. cape idea that like I'm like where am I making this work? I have been ruminating on a cape for like years now.

No, you're going to have to do a reveal. It's going to be a whole thing. And then when the party actually starts, no one's going to know where you are. People are going to like, how do you want this one certain drone shot? Yeah. You're going to get the shot and you're going to get out of there. And then you're going to- Yeah, they're like, guys, go home. This is weird. Then you're going to find it. You're going to post. It's going to be iconic and you're like, amazing. We got the shot. And your husband's like, we didn't even say I do. He's like, you skipped the whole ceremony, babe. She's like, we're good.

We're good. Okay, so here's what we're doing for the weekend. We're just like wishing Hannah well. We're like, we're just like we're sending good vibes, positive energy. I honestly like I cook right now just thinking like having the gigglers know what I'm going through makes me feel less alone because I felt really alone this last week besides my mom betrayed me and you and my husband and my cat who butter never smiles and everyone i mean people talk shit about butter though but also one quick announcement too to make me feel better does does his

hulu special drops oh yes i saw that i wanted to bring that up on friday go watch does this special if you feel weird watching just like a man get another man that you know in your life um it could be your dad it could be like if you have a boyfriend if you don't have a boyfriend like good good job um a man you met once just like send him the link I don't know but um

everyone watch it and message him and tell him your favorite jokes because we support one man the arts in this family I DM does but I didn't know what to say so I just did the hands up emoji he probably loved it two scorpios trying to show affection yeah I was just like good job

Your job over there. I love you guys. Thank you for not, for giggling. Thank you for taking the time. Thank you for taking the time at our emergency press conference. And we'll keep you posted and things are going to get better. Life can be hard sometimes.

Bye.