Giggly Squad - Giggling about crossroads, machetes, and tinned fish

Episode Date: April 30, 2025

Hannah is a different person when she's in LA and Paige has class president energy.watch the trailer for our new seriesorder our booksign up for our newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If you're anything like us, you love attention. And my favorite way to get all eyes on me is with next level shiny glossy hair. I'm talking hair so shiny it's stopping people in the streets. No seriously, it's giving double take. Which is why we're so excited to tell y'all about the new LaMelaure gloss collection from the girlies at Tresemme. Gigglers, this is the shine we've been searching for. I don't know how this LaMelaure technology works, but it's insane. And gigglers, this is the shine we've been searching for. I don't know how this lamellar technology works, but it's insane. And gigglers, we've got you too, because Trezme partnered with us to bring you 1-800 Gloss, a special bonus episode of Giggily Squad where Hannah and I give advice on all things hair and giving gloss.

Check out the episode and grab the lamellar gloss collection today because I'm officially declaring this spring gloss season. Welcome to your home sweet home internet with Oxio. You can try them out for 60 days and if they don't make your internet feel like home, they will give you your money back, all of it. No matter where you are, whether you're on the couch, in the tub, or wherever you use your phone at home,

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So visit Oxeo.ca and get one month free at checkout with promo code GIGGLI. What's up, gigglers? Gary, fix your wifi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed. I mean, the day just got away from me. What's up, my giggly wigglies? You know what that is? You know what a giggly wiggly is? Like a piggly wiggly? It could be, and I'm open to your interpretations. Oh, okay. This is, oh, sorry. I'm so sorry. This is something you in fact made up. Got it.

Okay. Okay. Keep it moving. When we get older and if we have kids and wait, sorry, I'm choking on my coconut drink. I'm in LA. Hold on one sec. I was just gonna say. It's been five seconds. The five is off. How long is it gonna take for Hannah to bring up that she's in LA?

She's like, sorry, I've been doing a juice cleanse and I'm just washing it down with some coconut water. We're over here drinking cyanide in New York. And going, perfect, thank you. I'll have some more. This giggly piggly thing, it's so stupid, but it's our version of the squiggles. When we're older, we're on tour.

We're just gonna be giggly wigglies for the little gigglers to watch us perform. We need to start performing, when we have children, to start performing in venues that have like a separate room so moms can bring their kids and like put them in daycare while they while we perform. I've realized that our humor is for toddlers actually and Lois is so excited to watch our docu series.

She's going to watch our docu-series. She's gonna watch every episode. She also, my mom was visiting and she was like, let's play Giggly Squad. And my mom was like, okay. And she goes, you're Hannah, I'm Paige. Wait, wait. So she made my mom be me. Knowing that there's a little girl out there

playing Giggly Squad. We're not okay as a nation. Okay, you saying that like our humor is for four year olds. That's why like, okay, we're going on morning shows. We're going on Jimmy Fallon. We made New York Times bestselling authors list. Like we're doing all these things. We're doing a little too much

some would say Sometimes I want to shake these people and be like do you even know what we joke about? You're saying they don't know who we are no like I felt like I've scammed so we are the Anna Delvey of podcast We are the Anna Delvey of podcasting. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. The best is when someone asks,

we wrote the book like a year ago, and when someone asks you about a part of the book and you're like, I don't remember that chapter. And I'm sitting there and I go, that's crazy, neither do I. I thought you had that. One of us wrote it. Someone asked me a question and in my head I was like, I don't know what she's asking me.

So I just changed the question with my answer and I was like yeah how do you like that from media trained? You are such a good politician. Back to me in LA you guys. When I tell you I'm a monster in LA, I had an audition right? They said I have to memorize five pages of script. I said yes. I sat in my room for seven hours.

And it's hard when you're alone. Also my brain was not processing any of it. Called my manager. I said hey it's not good over here. Yeah. Cancel the audition. But I feel, wait, I feel like you give, like you're, wait, so you didn't do it? No. No. Oh, man.

Oh. I was just gonna give you a compliment too. I was like, I feel like you give off, you're a good studier. I am, but I need ample time, and they gave me one day. And me alone in my room with so many distractions, and then a script. I mean, the bed's right there. It's like, what?

I was in the bed the whole time. Every time I would repeat a line, I'd be like, well, now I have to go check something to test myself. I actually have trouble with memorization. So then I started to get in my head, and I'm like, this is my struggle. But this is the thing. There was a self tape option, where you don't have to go in a room and have it fully memorized. Who's ever picking the not self tape option?

Look, people have told me I'm better in the room. Okay. That's what they say in this town. They're like, I guess you kind of had to be there. If that was a person, it's you. If you just watch me online, you're not going to get the full charm. It's kind of niche, actually. You kind of have to be surrounded by her and not be able to leave to really get her humor.

But I'm kind of proud of myself because I never quit anything. And I feel like it was super empowering that I was like, I can't do it. And I don't think I've ever done that before. No, you notoriously like you're, you'll make it work. Like sometimes being, it's funny, like, okay, we get asked the question a lot, like, how do you, how are you best friends,

but you like also work together? And like, we never know how to answer that because like, have we ever worked together? We've never been conscious that we're doing anything together. Right, like, we've never been conscious, like, oh, this is a work meeting we're having, because when we see each other on the screen,

we're like, this is a bit, this is a bit. I went to your hotel room to work on something and we talked for four hours about other things, because when we see each other on the screen, we're like, this is a bit. This is it. I went to your hotel room to work on something and we talked for four hours about other things and then you ordered room service for a family of eight and I got judged for it because I opened the door. You loved the rice pilaf.

You loved the rice pilaf. Incredible, I love rice. People don't talk about it enough. When I want four million of something, I order rice. I forget what my original point was was you were saying that I never quit Or you weren't I Mean someone somewhere could have been saying that I was like having boundaries with myself and I and you know how bad I have To be for me to think I'm gonna do a bad job because most of the time I'm delusional and I'm like, yeah

I got this call my manager. No, wait That's what I was gonna do a bad job, because most of the time I'm delusional and I'm like, yeah, I got this. Call my manager, I said. No, wait, that's what I was gonna say. Being on work texts with you, we know each other, so we know when the other one's like, oh yeah, totally, this is my work voice. I feel like you're like, yeah, absolutely, we can do it on that day, and I'm like,

I don't know if we actually physically can, but like she's such a, she's a pleasure to work with. Oh my God, thank you. As a child, if you got like, she talks a lot during class. Obviously I got that. On the report card, you now as an adult get your pleasure to work with. Interesting.

Let's normalize that pipeline. Well, you know what it is, I think the people who were talking too much in class, they wanted to be leaders. They were like, I'm not a follower. I'm not waiting for the teacher to start a topic. I'm bringing up a topic to my friend right now. They give class president energy.

They give class president energy. Hannah said to me the other day, she brought up this phrase class president energy and ever since that moment in time I have not been able to get it out of my brain. I think Giggly Squad is giving we are president vice president Giggly energy for the class. If the class. Like if the two of us, like we are the class of 2020. I feel like Giggly is the class of 2020. We are.

And now that it's 2025, we're like, we're only like. We just graduated. It's basically 2021. But also, okay, not to brag, but we are keeping the Gigglers fed. Their bellies are full and I could not get enough of it. We are like, we've been holding onto a secret from the Gigglers and we never do that.

Honestly, I rarely say this to people who aren't me, but like, we've seen too much of us. Like it's too much. I go on my Instagram, I'm like, it's too much. Are we over saturated? What is it called? Over exposed. I don't know. Over exposed.

We are one good article away from blowing it all up. True. We're one quote. But I'm so excited. To disappear for a while? No're one quote. But I'm so excited. To disappear for a while? No, no, no, I'm so excited for our web show. Oh. What am I, 1,002 years old? Web show?

Well, we should tune into the web series we're putting out. I don't know, that's like my old man voice. I've never done it. I've never heard it. You'll never hear it again. Wait, I love him. His name is Frank. Ron.

No, he's Italian. I'm glad that we were aligned that he's a one syllable man. We knew he was a simple man. He's a man of few words. So, in the beginning of tour, we're like, if we're gonna be doing this, we have to create some content. And I said, what if we forced ourselves

to do something in 10 cities? And we did it, like we committed to it. And we hid it from the gigglers, we were so sneaky with it. It was so much fun though. Like here's why so sneaky with it. It was so much fun though. Here's why I loved doing it. I hate using this word, but I feel like it's just used so much.

It's so raw. No, it's so raw, especially because a lot of people discovered us on reality TV, which is quaffed is the word I'll say. It's giggly squad if we didn't have microphones. So it's just our typical banter back and forth, but like being placed in situations. You're a literal fly on the wall of us being placed somewhere and full survival mode.

Like we weren't thriving by any means. No, we didn't like accomplish things, but like we survived. We survived, we tried. And there were so many times where I'm like, I don't think we can do this, and we did it. I have to say I watched the trailer like 50 times. Oh, I watched it a thousand times. I'm obsessed.

I'm like, Iconic never been done before. I know, it's like... I'm like, I don't know how YouTube works, but surely there's an award we'll get. For our two minute trailer. Also, we want to give credit where credit is due because everyone's like, give Grace a raise. Does Grace need a raise? Yes.

Do we actually, should Grace be paid more than both of us together? Yes. Grace was our head tour manager, traveled with us everywhere, made sure we were everywhere we had to be. We hired Hobson, who's a new character in the story. No, truly, I feel like we're just introducing

new character arcs. So Hobson came in as our cunty videographer. That was a big word. Yeah, that was a lot of syllables. I wasn't prepared for that. I quit halfway through the word. So she just like rolls in and like has her camera on. Occasionally she'd ask us questions and then she edited the frick out of it. Yeah she did such a good job editing. Here's like something people don't talk about until like you're putting like a show together like that.

The music, it changes the whole vibe. Well initially you know I told her I said I want hip hop. I want vibes. I want pussy popping, like slightly misogynistic. Did you say that to her? Yeah I said I want hip hop. But then she gave me the like that simple piano which is definitely like the office vibe and I said this is so much funnier so much funnier because

I can't always be in you know swag surfing mode no I'm certainly not see I would say 90% of the time I'm not in swiss serving mode but that 10% you gotta catch me at that 10% though but the piano makes it so funny and I'm I'm locked in I can't wait to watch and you guys these episodes I'm gonna drop it they're up to 20 minutes like this is a this is as long as like a tv show with commercials so interesting is because I've always wanted to be an aesthetic Sunday afternoon vlog girl. Which you still can be, nothing stopped you. Nothing's been in your way.

It's the same way I feel about my grid. I'm like, I've always want my grid to be so perfect and I always wanna make make these like clean girl videos But it's truly not who I am. I know and I know why you hate me because I am the arch nemesis to your grid Going well and like hey, can you collaborate on this?

going well and like hey can you collaborate on this? And you're like hey why don't you collab on this and fuck a thumbnail. You know like never thought of a thumbnail in your life. What is that TikTok? And suddenly I hear a scratchy voice. What is that? Out of nowhere. No I just want you to share,

like for example we went on Amy Poehler's pub. Can we shout out to the queen, to the goat, to our everything? It's just like it doesn't make any sense. We found out through the grapevine that Amy Poehler listened to Giggly Squad. We retired, then came back into the public eye and said, okay, we have to figure out how

to deal with this we're ready to work ready to work what what was how would you describe the experience of going on Amy's pod I just like it's so it's interesting because in the same like month I literally got to meet Amy Poehler for the first time and Chelsea Handler. And I could not have had better experiences. And like, those are two experiences that you're like, wow, if this doesn't go the way I have planned in my head, like my whole childhood and like growing up was a lie. And like, I don't know if I'll recover from that.

And the fact that both interactions were like better than you could have ever hoped for and they were just the most normal, like I felt seen. Not to be so LA right now, I feel like I'm even talking differently on this pod today. When you meet people in this town, if they suck, they're part of what you consume day to day.

So they ruin whole TV shows. There's something about- Correct. And sometimes they don't even suck, but they're just different than what you thought, and then you can't watch them the same way. Cause you're like, he farted in my face and walked away. I can't take him seriously as a superhero.

That's an example. Nothing like that happened. Kind of like a really niche but like iconic but like something that like should be in a TV show like that market Chris Hemsworth literally ripped ass in front of me and then turned around or the dog and walked away and I was like but sir you're Thor Thor doesn't fart it's part of the script did um did Chelsea and Amy change your opinion of blondes Yes, no Okay, do you want to hear something so funny? Because this is like, this is a story from my childhood

that is like deep rooted in my thing for blondes. First of all, side note, actually there's two stories, but whatever, we're gonna make them concise. One story when I was like modeling and if I didn't get like a certain job or something and if I were to ever ask my mom like, hey, did I like book that commercial or did I book whatever? And she would say, no, they went with a blonde.

In my head, it would register as like, oh, well I'm not blonde. So like, I didn't even compete against that girl. But it went back even further. When I was younger, my dad owned a car wash and one day me and my mom went to this car wash and he had like candy like on the side of the car wash and he would like give it to little kids and one day I saw my dad talking to this little girl. Was there a van involved? She was with her mom. She was with her mom and my dad's like talking to this little girl.

And I guess like I had just never seen my dad interact with a child other than like myself. So I was, as you can imagine, taken aback. And I was like, who is that girl? And I couldn't explain to my mom like what I was saying because I didn't know the word for blonde so I'd be like who is this little girl like with this like I was like mom she has a mom why are we not fighting still you fight her mom like and it truly traumatized me like I don't know if I thought like my dad was gonna go with like little girl and be her dad or what I cooked up in my head,

but it's deep rooted, my thing with blondes. My favorite is when we meet gigglers and they're blonde and they go, Paige, don't worry, we're really brunettes. No, I know, the gigglers are really funny about it. Also, I'm not kidding, every guy I've ever dated, I feel like gigglers are really funny about it. Oh, so like I'm not kidding every guy I've ever Dated I feel like immediately dates a blonde after and I'm like, oh you didn't you didn't get me at all Like solidified well, that's like our number one Like you don't do that. Yeah, I kind of like it cuz I'm like, oh, yeah

We didn't we weren't for each other. We didn't mash Oh a hundred percent cuz you've never once been seen with a blonde man because I'm like, oh yeah, we weren't for each other. We didn't mesh. Oh, 100%. Because you've never once been seen with a blonde man. Not even accidentally. You haven't accidentally slipped on a blonde dick ever. And you slip all the time. I've never. I've literally never.

Such a bad segue. Well, meanwhile, I love blondes. I love the blue eyes. I love silver, some would say. Wait, we didn't talk about how we met literally the girl version of Daphne in LA. Remember when we were doing the book signing, that girl was like, my name is Daphne,

but she also looked like Daphne. She was Daphne, and she had big blue eyes, and the cheekbones could slice an orange. And she had long long luxurious blonde hair and I was like, wait, you are my cat. You're my cat. You sent me a photo of Daphne looking in the mirror at you and it was the most page-coded photo.

No, when Daphne goes up to the mirror and just sits in front of it and looks at herself and then looks back at me, like, I'm just like, yeah, look at you. She looks back for my approval and I'm like, that's my daughter. It's easy to be skeptical of hair growth products. Many over promise and under deliver, but NutriFull is different. It's clinically tested and trusted by dermatologists. It's designed to improve thickness, strength,

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The Sunrise Challenge is back and it's a fun, impactful way for you to do something to make mental health care in Canada better and to show those living with mental illness and addiction that they're not alone. CAMH is Canada's largest mental health research center and hospital. The work being done at CAMH is helping transform the lives of people affected by mental illness and addiction and is building a future where no one is left behind no matter their postal code. By participating and raising funds you're doing your part to support a leading organization that is building better mental health care for

everyone. Register today at SunriseChallenge.ca slash Giggly Squad to rise as one for mental health care. That's SunriseChallenge.ca slash Giggly Squad. It's so hard to think of what to get your mom for Mother's Day. There's always the classic candle, flowers, maybe a sweater, and really all they want is for you to call them. And you can absolutely call them, but why not give them also an Aura digital frame? Aura Frames was named the best digital photo frame by Wirecutter and featured in 495 gift guides just last year. Aura has a great deal for Mother's Day. For a limited time, listeners can save on the perfect gift

by visiting auraframes.com. To get $45 off plus free shipping on their best-selling Carver Matte Frame, that's A-U-R-A frames.com. Use promo code GIGGLI. Support the show by mentioning us at checkout. Terms and conditions apply. Do you ever just have the urge to get out of the city? Well,

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So explore the great outdoors during the day and the vibrant city nightlife, making it the perfect summer coastal trip. Visit censusnb.ca to learn more or to start planning your trip today. Shout out to Kim and Lenore. If you don't know, Kim and Lenore, our mothers, were asked to open Amy Pollard's pod and ask questions. I think my mom was joking and Amy Poehler was like, what's your question for Hannah? And she goes, are you pregnant? I was like, what?

Okay, sorry. God forbid your mom runs a bit on a comedy pod. God forbid I bloated this week, mom. But I think she said that because I joke that no one ever asks that was the joke but I'm like but then I'm like oh my god everyone's gonna pick it up and like Dumas is gonna be like Hannah's pregnant. No one said it. Everyone else was like look at Hannah's mom running a bit. The universe is like please don't have a baby please no and of course my mom got like so spiritual

and existential and was just like, I just wanna know if she's happy. But also Kim is like you, we're so similar to our moms. Kim is shy, but I feel like Lenore empowered Kim. And Kim was so good on the pod, because Kim could have clammed up. You have many a time. She would have never been able to do it So good on the pot, because Kim could have clamped up. Like you have many a time.

She would have never been able to do it if your mom wasn't doing it at the same time. Like that was one of the things she was like nervous about. Like she was like, do you think we're going at the same time? Yeah. No, I think they are Giggly Squad. No, they are. They should have a recap show. They're the new watch with crap in. And they just say what we say in like voices and make fun of us. I love that.

I love that. So because it's nice out in LA, I've been walking and also because I canceled every job I had. I was just going to say maybe because you are unemployed. Nothing to do. You're like, you because you are unemployed. Unemployed, nothing to do. You're like, you thought you were a nepo baby. I told you. I was gonna say, what have you been doing out in LA?

Like have you been doing really LA things? Have you gone back to our Pilates place? Like what's going on? So I went to Pilates this morning. Katie Crick was not there. But I did Pilates and then I walked around. I do have to say, I also was walking around when I was in New York though,

because you know the second it hits 60 degrees, New Yorkers go fucking feral. No, everyone has a drug problem, they've quit their jobs. If you don't get on a rooftop, some men are running around the streets with no shirts. In five seconds, your head explodes. New Yorkers are not okay. You literally get evicted from your apartment

if you don't- Go outside. Go outside. Wait, I have to tell this story. Yes. Okay, sorry, were you telling a story? No. Okay.

I was just talking about walking. Were you saying anything of importance on our podcast? Have I ever said anything of importance? Okay, perfect. Okay, so if you don't live in New York City, let me just set the scene for you quite quickly. In the last year and a half, I don't know what's going on in New York,

but every single thing is a members club, and everyone's joining a members club, they're staying there for six months, they're canceling, they're going to a new members club. Now FOMO really does nothing for me, but also like sometimes it does. If I want to go somewhere and I can't have restrictions put upon me. But this is my thing, if all I have to do is pay to be a member that's not exclusive enough for me. If it's easy for me to become a member,

I'm not interested in your club. Here's the thing, I don't like people telling me I can't do something and I don't like relying on people either. So like if I want to go somewhere and they're like you can't come because you're not a member and there's no like you don't Want to deal with that? I'm like I'm not dealing with that. I'm becoming a member. So whatever so usually there's like all these questions Are you a member? Currently three and I don't go But if you have to go here's the other thing it's not just three it's three worldwide So if

they have houses other places, I'm worldwide. And you know, I love that because I'll just be like, take me with you. And I don't leave my couch. Now, I was applying to my most recent one. And sometimes, look, sometimes I get to not do the application process because maybe I know someone here and there. But I had not do the application process because maybe I know someone here and there, but I had to do an application process for this one recently. And it was some of the craziest questions I've ever seen. Was it like a psych evaluation? Like have you ever thought of-

I did a screenshot because I was like, surely I'm- You ordered caviar it came and the caviar was smaller, smaller spheres than you thought. What do you do? A, throw it at the waitress. No it wasn't multiple choice, it was like write in your answers. Oh you hate writing. I have to find this. No, you're like I wrote a whole book I'm not writing a thesis statement. I just put a link to how to giggle Okay, and then I'm like am I being weird in these answers? So, okay

Here's the first one. Tell us something it tell us something It can be your life story a fond memory a time that made you laugh a successful career Experience or anything you want to share it? No sure. I'm already out. I'm out. You're doing icebreakers with me Get me the fuck out of this burning building No In my head. I'm like I'm like wait This is a literal bad day I'm like, wait a second. This is a literal bad date.

This is like clubbed out for me. Wait, do you remember when Facebook groups, I think I still do it, they'd be like, oh, you think you know these people? What was, and you have to answer like questions about the group you're going into. So I, right, this prompt actually makes me sweat and I hate saying a fun fact about myself.

Oh you're quirky. You're quirky. You're not like other girls. I host a podcast with my best friend and last week we were on Jimmy Fallon. Wait you're a cunt. You go, um Jimmy period Fallon period Google it period. Suck my dick. Oh my God, I literally could not stop laughing and I was screened and I literally took a picture. I'm surprised you didn't send it to your brother to do it for you.

Okay, wait, that's usually my go-to. Wait, here's another question. We rely on our existing members to curate and shape the membership via their nomination. If you are already a member, name one or two people in your circle of friends that you would nominate for a membership. I go, I would nominate my friend Hannah Byrne. No, you didn't.

They go, and that's where we're going to have to stop you. She's an accomplished stand-up comedian and businesswoman. I don't wanna be a part of this fucking drama, okay? I am up to here with shit. Okay, here's the last one. We would love to know more about your family as well. Do you have a significant other or are you happily single? If you're attached, please tell us about your other half, including their name and a photo.

What? Wait, they're basically like, do you have good taste or do you like Uggos? Are they symmetrical in the face or not? Needless to say, I did get in. Well, this is the thing. You love this shit. Like you just want to be able to go the one time is the thing, you love this shit. Like you just wanna be able to go the one time of the year you may need to go. They were like, cool, we'll see you in 12 weeks.

I was like, all right. Just like. Here's my credit card number. So at some point in time, Hannah, we can go to the hottest new members club when it opens. Okay cool. Well now I'm excited. I just I did say we were in a lesbian partnership so just go with it when we get there.

But we are. But where's the lie? I have to say when I was walking around New York, I realized I haven't been outside in a second because Maybe it was because I was in the East Village, Lower East Side, but restaurants have gotten out of control in New York It's like just being a restaurant isn't enough anymore. They have to be like very specific Have you noticed this? Like I think I know what you're gonna say one shop is like, just gnocchi, the cool ass gnocchi store,

and the next one's like, sweet potato, all different kinds of sweet potato in different ways. And then the next one is like, my favorite is the rice pudding place. The rice pudding place, like, they're all these niche foods and I'm like, whatever happened to just Italian? Every time I walk by like the rice pudding place. I'm like You guys bringing in that much volume a day though that you're paying this rent. I've never seen one person walk in there

No, I think a lot of those are money laundering schemes. Yeah Yeah, and like I respect hustling. I support women in the arts. Totally. But it's just so funny, the specific stuff. And then in LA today, I ordered something that had a salad on it, which I was not happy about, but it was micro greens. Dosing?

Oh. So today we micro-dosed at lunch and like. This is your new question to get into the club. When you hear the word micro, what's the next thing that comes to mind? What generation are you in? Recession indicator. Recession indicator. Finish the sentence.

Micro? Micro greens? Just get a fucking salad, like a normal person. Why did you grow a microgreen and they taste like grass? Yeah, microgreens are like legit weeds. No weeds. Without the dandelion, like without the cuteness. No, it's crazy.

But then I went to this restaurant. I saw that you like went out. Were you jealous? Yeah, I was like, what is she doing? And I didn't tag the people I was with. No, that was so mysterious. I just put someone's hand holding a wine glass. You hard launched a friend.

It's all just to fuck with you, specifically. No, when you go to dinners with like once a year with other people, you tag like eight girls I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know.

I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know.

I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know.

I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I will never know. I guess we'll never know. No, I really don't. I really don't because you rarely say someone's first name. Like you really talk about people. Like it was a business meeting before I retired. And the problem was is, oh, I had a Lululemon. So I'm Lululemon's newest ambassador. And I'm laughing because I'm the first entertainer on there. I literally was like, I was on their roster.

I was like, guys, do you want me to hit tennis balls? And they're like, leave that to the professionals. They go, you're bringing joy. You're bringing laughter. You're the literal personality, huh? And I was like, I'm here to be an athlete. And they're like like we have athletes But I'm no it was it was so fun

I did this tennis thing with Lululemon it like this Beverly Hills mansion and so fucking fancy and cute Day before I'm telling you about it and you're like you're getting a spray tan, right? And I was like, yeah, obviously get back to my hotel room Find a girl to come over. See that's what I love about LA, they're literally crawling with spray tan artists. They're waiting to come in your room. You have to like.

You check into the hotel and they're like, and you have a complimentary spray tan artist. So I literally had to check into my new hotel and I'm texting the spray tan artist, artist by the way the hotel I went to it's 330 and The room wasn't ready which I Know we're getting into details here. We're getting into what's the word? We're getting into the weeds into the weeds second time we brought brought up weeds today. But that should be fucking illegal.

Four, I might as well check in at 9 p.m. What am I, I thought I was paying for a night. 4 p.m. is halfway into the night. I go to bed at seven, 4 p.m. And I coccally told my spray tan girl to get there at 3.30. So I'm sitting there waiting for my room. I see my spray tan girl, cause she's holding like a ton of spray tan stuff, get there at 3.30. So I'm sitting there waiting for my room. I see my spray tan girl, cause she's holding like a ton of spray tan stuff,

sits next to me, have to decide, do I tell her? But then I don't know how long I'm gonna be stuck here waiting for the room. Oh my God, so you just do the spray tan in the middle of the lobby? Luckily they go, your room's ready. She sprays me, iconic. Get told I have to go your rooms ready. She's she sprays me iconic Get told I have to go to a dinner

Well, it was like a dinner. I wanted to go to I just didn't know if it was happening and they're like dinners on in two hours Okay, okay, so two hours. So you know where this is going and she goes look the express tan is four hours I said, okay, we're going. Did she powder you? She did, she powdered me. But let's just say I showed up at the dinner, people, it was orange. People were looking.

People were staring. I walk in and every single person that I talked to, I had to be like, this is a spray tan by the way It's baking right now. It's a whole thing. You wouldn't get it. I'm kind of marinating right now I thought it was gonna be two hours express. It's actually four hour express and I only brought one outfit, right? Next day I made some friends at the tennis event and they were like, do you want to go dinner? And I go I know a place at the tennis event and they were like do you want to go to dinner and I go I know a place this thing about me if I like a place I'm going to go back I'm

going back so now I'm a regular at salty girl wait shout out salty girl it's in Boston and LA please come to New York it specializes in tin fish you're so LA I don't even know who you are right now what in the fuck is a tin fish are you talking about like caviar no like you open a tin and it'll be like smoked mackerel or sardines or or I actually forgot, but it's like fish in a tin can. It actually sounds like we're prepping for the apocalypse, but we're eating from cans.

That actually sounds so scary. You're like, this is the hottest new restaurant and they've eliminated utensils. No, like Beyonce's gone there. Okay. Next day I show up wearing the same outfit because I only brought one outfit, so then I had to tell oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed.

I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed.

I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed.

I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, oh, I bet my life on it that you sweat at dinners. You know me, when I get a good story going, I start sweating immediately. When I get a good banter back and forth, that's a game. No, you guys, after recording the podcast, I'm soiled. Sorry, I didn't mean to say that word. No, in the summer sometimes, there was like one time when we were recording the pod,

it was the middle of the summer and I was like straight up fighting for my life. I feel like I almost passed out. Yeah. No, this is, it's a marathon, not a sprint. Yeah. One last thing about me walking. Have you walked?

I mean, we've only been trying to get to it. You started the pod with this story. Have you walked around in an airport recently? Yeah. Why are the floors so sticky? Like I don't know if it's because I had new sneakers on. I'm tripping the entire walk to G4. You know it's like one of my favorite conversations like as a New Yorker that like everyone has had. I know what you're gonna say. Is the discussion with a New Yorker that like everyone has had is the discussion with other New Yorkers when you just like lay down the law on like Newark, JFK, LaGuardia, everyone gives their points and then where they're located in

Manhattan and so that what makes sense for them specifically to go to like I'm so happy like I could fully converted one of my friends over like fully over to Newark Airport. And I was like, I just don't think you're giving it the credit that it deserves. Are you the face of Newark Airport? I'm like the face of Newark Airport and I don't want Delta to find out about it

because it is a United hub. And so I'm like super dialed in with the Tri-City. This is random, but one of my friends who's doing great, and it probably can't be disclosed yet, but she's working with Bob's Discount Furniture, and I've never been more jealous. That's kind of how I felt when I saw that Heather McMahon was on a cruise, like doing comedy,

and I was like, wait a second, how has Giggly Squad not been asked to go and do like a Giggly Squad themed cruise? And I like got really jealous. You would just have a panic attack immediately. I mean, 100%, but the invitation is still nice. We go, who wants to have a panic attack on a boat with us? Who wants to really raise the stakes?

You can't get away because you're in the middle of the ocean. Anywho. Speaking of stakes, wait, do you have the Citizen app? I do. I was talking to my makeup artist in LA and she was making me laugh so hard. Shout out, Crystal. She was saying how she deleted the Citizen app

because she was like, why are there so many men with machetes? The Citizen app will really have you... How many machetes are there? The Citizen app will literally have you so grateful for your own problems. Like I think of it as like a dose of like my own reality because I'm like, okay, I'm having like not that great

of a day, but this guy is losing his damn mind. But also why is it always right outside your doorstep? You know the other thing I'm like waiting for Citizens App to do a collab with Jumah because like the fact that you can go live on Citizens App, I'm like that's, like just anyone can go live on Citizens's app, I'm like, that's, like just anyone can go live on Citizen's app and show what's going on. I don't have it because I wanna live in peace.

So like. Yeah, and you definitely wouldn't if you had it. So I haven't done it, but imagine a Dumas Citizen app where it was like Leonardo DiCaprio spotted drinking a beer at. And you just go live? Yeah, and that person just goes live and then everyone else can like watch the live.

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living space today with Cozy. Visit Cozey.ca, the home of possibilities made easy. The Home of Possibilities made easy. driving closer to the truth. While curled up on the couch with your cat, there's more to imagine when you listen. Discover heart-pounding thrillers on Audible. This is random, but I have a very important question, which we've never discussed on Giggly Squad before. I'm so excited. You're so excited I could tell.

Were you, I actually know the answer, but were you team, were you team Brittany or Christina? Do you wanna say it on the count of three? Yeah. One, two. What I was originally. One, two. Oh. Oh. Well, not originally,

but okay, let's just do it. One, two. Oh. Well, not originally, but okay, let's just do it. One, two, three. Brittany. Brittany. See, I was team Christina. Which is. Then why'd you just say Brittany? Cause that was you.

I thought we were guessing you. Why? Okay, rewind the tape. Why would we both do me? Why would you do yours? Can you guys rewind the tape? What would we both do me? Why would you do yours? Can you guys rewind the tape? What did I say at the time? Grace, rewind it.

This is so us coded. I was obsessed with Christina because I was like, give her credit where credit is due. That girl has a voice. That girl has the talent. I felt like she was performing less for the male gaze. Looking at it now, I realize Britney was performing for the male gaze, G-A-Y-S.

Okay. I just thought that Christina was like tougher, less girly and better singer. Oh, so you're less tough if you're more girly? That was internalized misogyny for me. Yep, cancel seven-year-old Hannah. That was fucked up. That's fucked up.

I get what you mean though. She did have more of like a tomboy-esque. Yeah, like she was less. She was like more bad. Like she had streaks in her hair Yes, she did red streaks at one point and I just when she hit the high notes I just thought but you know what it was It was us putting two women against each other and that's what the media

wanted us to do And they loved it back then too here's the thing mine simple and to do. And they loved it back then too. Here's the thing, mine's simple and it's actually like too simple and I think I was more of a Britney fan because Crossroads. And there's just like not much else I could say. She was an actress. Yes. You know? Yeah. And I would have loved to seen Christina dip her toe in that waters but she just didn't. And so for that is what- Did you not see Burlesque? That's, you're going years later.

True. I'm talking peak, denim on denim. Zoe Zaldana. Iconique. Iconique. Should we remake Crossroads with me, you and Grace? Wait, that's what our tour doc is it's crossroads isn't she like going to like find what are they even go I what is the plot of

crossroads you know I've never watched crossroads I couldn't tell you a single fact about it now one storyline on cross big deal. Tell me one storyline on CrowdStory. I feel like Zoe Zeldana does lose her virginity. And it's like to the soccer coach. Something really, it's like. I think something was highly illegal, but we just never said anything about it. But anywho.

Wait, people aren't talking about Jessica Simpson's comeback. What's going on? What is she doing? Like, I think she, her and her husband broke up and she like, she's singing again. I love that for her. And people were so mean about her vocals when like,

I'm sorry. What? Her vocals are- Take my breath away? Like, read a book. Take my breath away. Oh. Now let's talk about singers going to actress mode. Her in...

Daisy Dukes. Yeah, but that's not the name of it. What's it called? Those are just a denim shorts. Wasn't she in a Dane Cook one? Dukes of Hazzard. I was close. You were close.

Yeah. Like again, what was that movie? I'm like not good, but I loved her in it. I like watching, this is why I can't watch Post-Apocalyptic, I grew up on crossroads, I grew up on the Dukes of Hazzard. I need to see a pretty girl. I literally sound like an old misogynistic man.

I'm like, if they're not pretty on the screen, I'm like, I want to see a cute little outfit. Do you look good or you look like shit? I want to see you look good. That's so you. Why smile more? Why don't you smile more? Why do I get like southern? Why do I get like so third? Can we discuss you showing up to the book event, not dressing girly, in a full dad 80s suit tie glasses? How was it? What was the experience? Okay, well it's so funny because everyone was in my DMs being like, you're stealing

Hannah's style. You're stealing Hannah's style. That's so funny because no one DMed that to me. Really? Yeah, my people were supportive. They were like, Paige looks so good. Oh my God, see, my girls turned against me. Your girls were like, this is not the Paige we signed up for. We have enough of Hannah, we don't need more.

They're like, we've been duped and quite frankly. They go, is this gonna stay for a while? Cause we just have to know if we have to jump off ship. I. So the pages were not happy. I got that suit, like that little set. And then I saw that I had those glasses and I was just like, I can't not.

Okay, so it was a set, so everyone could calm down. She wore a set, she didn't go completely rogue. And I just feel like when I'm in LA, I am different and I am just more apt to like, fuck it, let's try it. I feel like I'm in a different country and they don't even have the same TV channels. I'm like, it's different.. I go how do you say cucumber? Yeah I'm immediately Hilaria Baldwin when I step into LA. The thing though with

outfits is like you actually carry yourself differently in different outfits. Wait we got red to filth right before we got to the venue. Paige is wearing her outfit I'm wearing my outfit. This man is just getting in the elevator and he goes, are you guys in a play? We couldn't even answer him, we were like, that was good. And I was dumbfounded. Cause he wasn't even trying to be mean,

he genuinely was like like you guys look ridiculous And we go oh, you don't understand what avant-garde is you uncultured swine he literally Kim Kardashian Us he was like you look like fucking clowns You're like it's an oversized blazer sir he goes okay Charlie fucking chaplain I did look like little House on the Prairie. He's like, sorry, my sisters are acting crazy. Oh God, but the book tour has been so fun. There was like smart people there.

It was like the Coachella for books in LA that we went to. And- Okay, that's why I was like nervous going to LA. I was like, wait, this is like a real, this is like Scholastic Book Fair for like adults, like on steroids. Wait, you're so right. So you were overcompensated, you panicked.

I was like, this is if the Scholastic Book Fair like grew up, got a job in finance and like did cocaine. So I just had to get dressed appropriately. That is so funny. The LA Times was like, can you please not refer to us? It's not really the brand we were going for, but thank you. OK, well, let's tell the story. Wait, so we're at this book event and they're like, OK, guys, like now

you have to go upstairs and they take your pictures and there's like one like little video thing that they're gonna wanna do with you and we're like, okay, great, like amazing. Look, the last thing you wanna do to me and Hannah is put us on a set, okay? With- Lights, camera, action. Yeah, with props.

Yeah, they had one sofa and we were like, let's get into it. Like, we'll make do, it's showbiz, like we'll figure it out. And they ask us the first question. Okay, now mind you, it's in a room of like just men. Yes. Like a very- That energy threw us. That threw us a little.

Of various ages. And so they ask us the first question and it's like, if your book was a scent, like what would it smell like? And so, sorry, I I like I'm being myself the first thing that popped into my mind Hannah's vagina. That was this that was so funny about it is because I was ready to be a professional as you know it's great working with me like I was gonna put on my smart voice I was trying to think of a soliloquy.

You were like lemongrass, eucalyptus, and I was like my best friend's pussy. And when you said that, I could not have been more proud of you. Like I was like, I raised her right. I was like, because she birthed this book, okay? Put some respect on her Vagene. It feels like, you know, when you're hanging out

with your friend group all the time and then you start talking to someone who's not in your friend group and you realize the shit you're saying is like not okay, but you've been enabled. That's us out of Giggly Squad. Like fish out of water, flopping around. The men in this room were so taken ab-

It was as if they were gonna take our rights right away in them they go this is why these bitches shouldn't have microphones they're like and this is why women aren't presidents this is not the America we signed up for and then you go in a Gwyneth Paltrow kind of way and he was like still don't know what that means there's like one girl in the back and she was like I get it you know what's crazy? We're technically on a press tour, a la Wicked.

No, we literally are. Like I didn't realize it until it was too late. I was like, this is a press tour. Really? Because I've been keeping character with my outfits as well. And you are, you're telling me you haven't noticed. I've been dressing as a New York Times bestselling author. Well, the second you hit bestseller status,

you brought out the fake glasses, which you honestly have been kind of killing. But you don't commit to them. You take them off because you said it hurt. I don't, well because they give me headaches. You said you can't see or hear or taste. I lose all my senses. I would wear more, but I have a very specific shape

that works with my egghead. You can wear different shape glasses because whatever, genetically, you're lucky in that way. Hats and glasses, I do find that I can pull them off. I can't pull off a hat. You can but you're just like nervous. Yeah I feel insecure I feel like everyone's like look at her in that hat. Yeah they're like she doesn't wear hats a lot and we know. I can tell that girl took a risk with a hat today. It was a weird one for a Tuesday

afternoon but we're supporting her. Someone's like oh sorry you're in a hat I just can't focus right now. Wait, I feel like there was some crazy pop culture stuff going on, is Miley Cyrus' dad dating someone? Elizabeth Hurley. Wait, can you explain? Who Elizabeth Hurley is or? Just like what's happening?

The dating. How they meet, like do you know the tea? I actually don't know anything, except I did see that they were posting on Instagram together. Imagine it's a PR relationship and someone was like, this will be good for you guys. Not only, okay, here's the thing too, that people need to be stopped. They did a joint post on Instagram. Yeah, I Just I think cuz they are older they didn't know and they were celebrating Easter together. I Don't know why but I feel like we're supposed to be mad at Billy Ray Cyrus I feel like I don't trust a man with three names that goes by three names. What are you hiding?

What are you trying to distract me from and Elizabeth Elizabeth Hurley, that's Versace iconic status. She's beyond an icon. Someone said Liz has a history of dating eccentric guys. Well, here's the thing, I don't think anyone of his family talks to him, I don't think Miley Cyrus talks to her dad. Also, I wouldn't call him eccentric. He's a country singer.

But he's not. I mean, he is, but he's weird. Because Instagram's weird, he posts weird things. He has a bullet. They're giving me Angelina Jolie. And her brother? No, Billy Bob Thorne. Oh, Billy Bob Thorne. Oh, Billy Bob Thorne.

Were each other's blood, stuff like that. Hot take, if you're an adult, don't go by Billy. It's weird. Your name's Bill. Your name's William. Your name's William. Yeah, going by Billy. Josephine's dog's name is Billy,

so it's literally all I can think of, I think of a dog's name. Yeah, that's a beautiful Billy. Hi Billy Not a grown man who has who has to pay taxes Billy or Bobby your name's Bob. I don't mind Bobby Not if you're like 70 Agree to disagree. I don't mind Bobby. I love a Robert.

Are you really sticking with that answer? If I had to go toe to toe, if it was like this and like between this and my soulmate, like if his name was Bobby, like I would be fine with that. I'm triggered because I actually did date a very good looking guy, but his name was Bobby and I couldn be fine with that. I'm triggered because I actually did date a very good-looking guy but his name was Bobby and I couldn't take him seriously. I get that and you're valid for that. Yeah. Is the Met Gala coming up? It's literally tomorrow, it's next week. Oh my god are you okay? Like how

are you feeling about it? I mean I'm excited about it honestly I'm so exhausted from this month that I'm like there's not much that could get me excited right now. You know we didn't even really talk about becoming a New York Times bestseller. We didn't. It's kind of crazy. Because like the gigglers definitely don't read the New York Times. No we certainly don't. I mean, we're on TikTok, which basically the New York Times. But no, we wouldn't get this if it wasn't for the giggler. So I just like wanted to say thank you because it really is just such a crazy moment.

Actually our we like got on a zoom with like all of our team to like for them to tell us like if we got made it or not, We were waiting for the results, whatever, and they videoed it. And Hannah and I are so in shock that it looks like the video, it literally looks like we didn't give a shit because we were just like, wait, what? There's just no way.

Also, we didn't write a book to hope that it becomes a New York Times bestseller. We wrote a book to make the gigglers laugh and then we forget that like gigglers have become it's become bigger than us and we just love the gigglers so much um it's great like we're still getting tagged in like hundreds of posts of people also some of these girls are going on nice vacations with their book Also, some of these girls are going on nice vacations with their book. No, please. Let's discuss that for a second.

Bitches are in Turks and Caicos. Wait, let's talk about the gossip in which, like, where are the gigglers? Are we not working anymore? The gigglers are retired. Or they have cute as fuck pets. No, the gigglers are on vacation. And we love that for them and we're going on it soon.

We're going on one soon. And some of their engagement rings. I'm like, oh, okay. Okay, girl. No, like you can learn so much about someone's life just from their decision of what they post the book as. Their aesthetic behind it. Yeah.

I also, we should officially announce that our YouTube series, Hannah and Paige Try New Things, where we force ourselves to try new things in a different city each week. First episode drops Monday, 6 p.m. Lock in motherfuckers, it's happening, it's game time. We're back on the big screen. When you watch it on your computer.

Or you guys, some of you attach it to your real TV which is Women in STEM. Yeah, Hannah could literally never. I wanna see if I have any final questions. Oh, I learned that there's nannies for plants. Love that. As someone who's kept one specific plant alive for like almost five years, I get that.

And I agree with that. Would you ever give your baby to like a nanny to take care of? My plant? Yeah. 100%. Does Daphne try to eat her? Never, not once. Has literally zero interest in my plant.

Daphne's busy looking at herself in the mirror. No, Daphne is like, I really don't get her. Like Daphne's never had human food, never even come over to it, has no interest, does not care. She's so British and well-behaved. She's like, I look at you, I don't need, no, I don't need your fish. Like, I don't want your gnocchi from,

I don't want your salty, actually, she would love a tin fish. She would love a tin fish. Yeah. And that's called a call back, motherfuckers. Never doubt us. That would pique her interest. Thank you guys so much for giggling with us this week.

Definitely watch Amy, or listen to Amy Poehler's interview with us. Subscribe to our YouTube for Hannah Page Try New Things. Episode's out on Monday and we love you so much. Bye. Hey everyone it's Jenna Bush Hager from Today with Jenna and Friends reminding you to check out my podcast Open Book with Jenna. In this week's episode I sit down with Hannah Berner and Paige page to sorbo from the giggly

squad podcast to discuss friendships in their new book how to get go a guide to taking life less seriously you can listen to the full conversation now by searching open book with Jenna wherever you get your podcasts. You search for your form. Who disappeared without a trace. You knew there were witnesses, but lips were sealed. You swept the city, driving closer to the truth, while curled up on the couch with your cat. There's more to imagine when you listen.

Discover heart-pounding thrillers on Audible.