Giggly Squad - Giggling about Netflix, leopard print, and peeing

Episode Date: January 23, 2024

Paige shares a secret with the gigglers and Hannah is going to Netflix! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Advertise on more than 100,000 podcast shows with ACAST. Head to go.acast cast comm slash closer to get started What's up my giglers we're going to Netflix baby, I mean the day just got away from me. What's up my giglers? We're going to Netflix baby! I mean Hannah, just broke the internet. Broke the internet. No, I told Paige I actually got overwhelmed and I haven't been on my phone all day

cause I didn't expect positivity but like it gets me uncomfortable. It's like my wedding and everyone was so fucking, like it makes me wanna cry and I don't like emotions. And I also, let's be honest, I don't feel comfortable with happiness. I like to feel slightly unnerved. I wanna complain.

I mean we don't have a good day. There has to be at least one thing that I'm annoyed about, you know, that I can talk to people about. I enjoy being upset about something. So no, it was like, I love, you guys know that I can't keep my mouth shut. So if I'm gonna tease you guys on something, it's gonna be fucking worth it.

No, and this took a lot to keep the secret. It took a lot. I even tried to like, I kept it from you in the very beginning just cause contracts were like not legit and I think that if I tell you that it would fall through and then I'd be up to be like, hey legit. And I think that if I tell you that it would fall through and then I'd be up to be like, hey, how y'all doing? That's such an Italian thing.

Like to not tell people anything because people have that energy. No, you don't have that energy. But like, basically the gods know, like if you get too excited for something, like, I don't know. No, I don't tell anyone anything because truly like you never know what they're thinking. Like if you told someone then like what if they went home

and they were like, oh, I really like, I hope she doesn't get that or I hope it doesn't happen. And then it doesn't happen. I feel like they did that with their manifesting. And so I agree with not telling anyone shit. Well, you know who did something with their manifesting and that's why I said we got an Netflix special. It's the giglers.

It's all, it is like, let's be honest, if I didn't have Gigli Squad, I would have been in a farm in Idaho right now, probably very happy, but there's a couple fucking weird, hilarious girls on the internet that said, you know what, I like these two girls and I'm gonna stick with them in spite of a lot of things I feel like now when I see giglers in the wild like I've met a few being an

aspen and we're so coy like this one girl came up and she was just like hey gigler obviously great to see you like-key kind of sick of us. They're like, you were talking a lot about lasagna last week. Are you good? No, I love the Gigglers. Okay, I have a very Giggly Squad story. Tell me.

To the point where like, I told Craig this story and I go, you can't tell anyone. Like seriously, don't tell anyone. It's so embarrassing. And he goes, okay, Paige, you're gonna say it on your podcast. I go, you can't tell anyone. Like seriously, don't tell anyone, it's so embarrassing. And he goes, okay Paige, you're gonna say it on your podcast. I go, you're absolutely right. I am. If you're supposed to be your best friend

that you have to tell every story to. No, I have. Okay, so let me just set the scene for you. And I have no idea if these two situations are related, but I have to give you, yeah, I have to give you the past to understand the present. Okay.

No, this is girlhood. Give me every fucking detail. Set it up as long as you need to. So when I was in college, I feel like, maybe I was a little stressed out every once in a while and who knows? So one time I woke up in the morning to a text message from one of my girlfriends saying,

did you mean to post that Snapchat last night? Which is not a fucking text you wanna wake up to. I was like, what are you talking about? She goes, you posted, you sent me a Snapchat last night at like two in the morning and I go, what was it of? And she goes, just you sitting up in bed smiling, like you took a selfie and sent it to me. You go, that's not me.

I wouldn't smile on a Snapchat. I was like, that's so fucking scary. That means I literally did that in my sleep. Like I don't know, I don't know why I did that. Couple weeks late, like this happens, okay? Couple weeks later, don't know if it's related. I wake up in the morning, like a normal morning, and I'm like, oh my God, my bed is like all wet.

Like what is going on? And I get up and I'm like, oh my fucking God, I peed the bed, like I'm college and I'm sober. Like I lived at home, like I wasn't and I'm freaking out. Are you sure it was not marinara sauce? No, like it smelled like pee. I like run downstairs, I'm freaking out. Are you sure it was not marinara sauce? No, it smelled like pee. I run downstairs, I'm like something's wrong, mom. Like I don't know what's going on.

Like I'm literally convinced I have like a brain tumor. Like that I can't. Yeah. And she's like, okay, stop freaking out. Like you were probably just like so tired and had to pee and like couldn't get up. And like this happens sometimes, don't worry about it. Never happened again.

We're great. Fine. Fast forward 10 fucking years. Okay. I get a text message from Sierra a couple of weeks ago in the morning and she goes, did you mean to FaceTime me at 1 30 in the morning? Not say anything and then throw your phone. And I was like, what? No, I didn't do that. Couple days later, I spend the day organizing my closet. I have specific piles on the floor.

I go into my closet the next morning. There's a pair of pants that I have not worn in years. On the floor, almost as if someone tried them on and then just left them on the floor. You've told us this part. Okay, so that happens. A couple days later, I wake up in the morning and I'm like, why is my bed wet?

Like what is going on? I get up, can I fucking pee in the middle of the night? You're a 30 year old geriatric woman. I don't know what's happening. fucking pee in the middle of the night. You're a 30 year old geriatric woman. I don't know what's happening to me. You need to have a collaboration like Lisa Rena with the diapers. Someone needs to monitor me during my sleep

because what am I getting up and doing? I'm getting up, I'm putting on outfits. Like what am I doing? Now I'm peeing the bed. Wait, that's like what frat guys do cause they drank too much and then your bed smells like pee. I was like, I have something so embarrassing to tell you

but I peed the bed last night and he was like, what are you talking about? I was like, don't tell anyone. And then I was like, I have to tell the ganglers. How do you clean it? I just took my sheets off and like my bedding and I washed it. I didn't know.

And I had a spray tan on that night. So literally my thighs like got wet. Okay, this is so graphic. Kim, fast forward 30 seconds. Are you sure you didn't have a wet dream and you just like squirt it? No, no, I didn't. Do you want to know what? Craig asked me the same fucking thing. I was like, no, I'm not a 13 year old boy.

And he goes, okay, well you say you're just peeing in the bed? That's a problem. No, I don't know. So like now I'm so scared of like what I'm doing in my sleeve. I feel like this is something that you would Google and you could like really scare yourself about like what's going on. I haven't Googled it because I think it's just

like stress and anxiety and that I'm doing weird things in my sleep. When physical, weird physical things are happening to you, sometimes it is just something going on. I always had something going on in my life that was really fucking irking me and my body was just like, like I could try to lie to myself and be like,

life is good, life is good, but your brain is like, it's not. And then your body goes, okay, this bitch isn't listening. And then next to you know, you're like, heart beating and you're like, why are you beating the bed? But, bitch is an aspen living life right now. She has a headband on and a turtleneck and a beautiful French manicure.

So this is just to let you guys know. Don't believe social media. Don't believe social media. I literally, I exited last night from all my friends. My boyfriend included, I literally ran to the car because I get altitude sickness like no other. Like I can't. So you're throwing up and peeing in the bed.

No, no mess over here. Like I need to go to a doctor. I need to be monitored. Altitude sickness is wild. It's like you're so dainty that if you're like too high in the sky, you're like, mm, I'm gonna explode. And somebody said that like living and being an aspen by just living, you're like, I'm gonna explode. And somebody said that like living and being an aspen by just living, you're burning calories.

Oh so you love aspen. You love aspen. And I love that. I'm envisioning you just like the bird from Shrek when she sings too loud when you're in the altitude and you're just like, and you just explode. Yeah, that's what happened to me. I was like, sorry guys, I have to go home

to throw up like in a proper bathroom like by myself. And they were like, oh okay. Do you remember Giggly I was like, sorry guys, I have to go home to throw up in a proper bathroom by myself. And they were like, oh. Do you remember Giggly Squad was me making one joke about a boner or something about a fart and you would be like Hannah, stop. And now you've been talking about bodily fluids for 10 minutes now. And I haven't said, well I did say the squirt comment.

But we've evolved. No, we've evolved. Yeah, like two years ago I I would have never told the giglers that I peed my fucking pants. You would have taken that to the grave. To the grave and now I'm like, be aware. Something's going on. I don't mean this in a bad way,

but like I fear that you are using gigli squad as more of therapy than your own therapist. And I love it cause it's great content, but I just, as your friend. Because last week Maria said, okay. We need to really. Oh, we're saying her name. We're saying her name.

Maria was like, we need to really kick it into gear here. I need you to journal every day. And then I need to see said journal. I was like, okay. She was like, I need you to just write down your feelings. Okay. Identify one feeling. She was like, I need you to just write down your feelings. Okay. Identify one feeling. She goes, this is the problem.

I cannot spell or form a sentence. She was like, we're now on texting level. She's like, why don't you just text me? I go, can I voice note my feelings to you? Paige and I have voice noted for like two and a half hours, of course, whenever Dez is gone, not once did I think of picking up the phone and calling you.

And there was like tea, there was emotions, it was heated. But do you have a rerecorded voice note? Do you ever like start it and you go, that's not the vibe? Yeah, because sometimes I like will forget what I'm saying and I'm like, well, now this is just like pointless. But here's the thing, I love listening to my voice recordings back. I'm like, well now this is just like pointless. But here's the thing, I love listening to my voice recordings back. I'm like, oh, she's gonna love this.

She's gonna, I pretend I'm you. I'm like, she's gonna die. I once listened to one of mine and I'm just laughing so hard. I'm like, I sound so goofy and stupid. Like I can't believe she likes me. But we were joking how like there's no way to like properly end a voice note. No.

You always have to be like, unseen. Roger that. Yeah, and I'm just like, and now your opinions. And now your turn. Over. No, voice notes. If anyone's trying to start a podcast, start with voice notes. Start with voice notes and if you've good voice note chemistry, like if you can voice

notes for like 10 hours straight, you can easy do a podcast. Me and you are so bad at admin. Like we both are going to Aspen once this year. I'm going for shows. You're going with Craig, cause Craig wants a skateboard or whatever they do. Snowboard. And you want like to post.

I literally wanted to make one TikTok and I made it. Yeah. You made one TikTok. Okay, got it. Thriving. So we are both going to Aspen and missing each other by like two days. And then I was in Charleston yesterday.

I know. And everyone's like, where the f- I was walking around. I thought I was going to be treated. OK, I did go to Charleston once with Paige and I was treated like the child of a royal family. People, like I was just walking behind Paige and people were like, do you want me to wipe your shoes? Like, are you okay?

Like Paige and Craig, did you, what does Paige smell like? Like that kind of thing. And I was like, I love being in Charleston. And then I was walking around King Street, no respect. Yep. No respect. I said, I am the sister of Paige DeSorbo. I am the basically the sister-in-law to Craig Conover.

Turns out everyone knows Craig, and everyone's like, we talk to him all the time. He's the mayor. I went to one store and someone recognized me and I was like, yes. And they were like, we thought we were gonna see Paige and Charleston, I go, nope. You saw me?

I know, I can't believe we didn't like time. Any of that, here's the thing, because we're such individuals and like we don't want, I don't want to do anything, so I don't like. No, I feel like us planning a trip is like almost try hard. Like are we trying to like prove our friendship to people? Yeah, like what are we like trying to be like we're adults? Like, oh, let's plan a vacay, like, no.

We've never once even attempted to plan a vacay. Hannah, we've never even gone out to dinner with your husband and my boyfriend in three years. Not one time. Because that shit is fake. That shit is fake. That shit is fake. That shit is so fucking fake.

No legitimate friends are going out on double dates. You're going to their houses. Like you're hanging out. I don't know. I don't like. Or you're just like FaceTiming and they like get in the back and you're like, hi. Yeah, like a double date is aggressive.

If you're going to dinner, what are you trying to prove? You know what? The same way that we say like if relationships are trying too hard, like they're overcompensating, that's how I feel about friendships. That's how I feel about friendships. Like you know the girls who suddenly get a new friend and they're like everywhere

and I'm like you guys are using each other for attention. And I love that, I love girlhood, but like don't make everyone else feel like you guys have this beautiful friendship. Like you guys are gonna hate each other in three days because you just are using each other for Instagram likes. You know one thing I do love about getting older I think I that you pee yourself that your pussy can't even hold pee anymore. Other than the

fact that I am the spokesperson for it depends I know some Instagram account is just gonna put me in a diaper which is, you know I love a mini short. Riggum and roll production, oh my God, wait, you should go back on all those pages who ever talked shit about you for wearing no pants and being like I needed to wear a Mimoo diaper. Sorry, I have a medical condition, how bad do you feel about yourself now?

I had to wear underwear. I had a white set vagina, but a very tiny canal my doctor told me. Sorry that I'm having a bladder issue. No, the one thing I do like about getting older, I feel like there's so much fucking pressure on women to have like such big girl groups of friends. Like I remember when Taylor Swift was doing

that whole like girl gang stuff and they were all going to her house and like Newport or whatever. And I did have like a great group of girlfriends in high school and I'm very thankful. But once I got into my twenties, like everyone lives different places, you meet new people. So I did feel that pressure of like, Oh my God, I don't have like a big group of girlfriends. Like I'm a loser. I have no friends, whatever. I love that and how it's socially acceptable to have friends disappear, dwindle. See you

later, because our lives are going in different directions. Like we're getting older. You don't, it's socially acceptable to have literally three good friends. No, but I think that's a flex. If you have three good friends, that's a fucking flex. Such a flex.

And also, I do love those friends who like for whatever reason you can't spend time with them, you can't see them that much, but like there are moments in your life that they will just like you love each other and they'll like FaceTime you or they'll randomly text you or they'll comment on your Instagrams like there is so many levels of friendships, but you're so right. The best part of aging is like that you are not expected to hang out with friends anymore. Yeah.

Like I can't wait to kit for kids because I built an excuse. Sorry, my kids can't come. I was gonna say that. And you guys, we're not saying don't hang out with your friends. I'm saying, you know those nights that you're literally bitching like, fuck, we have to go out tonight.

Do you remember we would do that all the time? Like I don't even know who you were in your early 20s but we all know when we're like fuck we have to go out tonight. You never have to go out again. No, Hannah I've been on this ski trip with like and it's like a fun ski trip. I have not drank because I'm like. You're the epitome of health in one listen.

If you do drink, it's to come right out of your pussy. I hung out with Melissa Wood Health the other day. I actually don't drink. Thank you. Okay, so Paige and I did Melissa Wood Health's podcast. Now Paige was addicted to her workouts and I would have done her workouts, but I was depressed at the time. I was the best version of me. She basically was like, we'd love to have you on the time. I was the best version of me.

She basically was like, we'd love to have you on the pod. And of course I was like, yes, cause I like to talk to anyone on a microphone. And then I do some research while we're on the way. And I realized her last guest was Deepak Chopra. And then your text to me and you go, um, what are we supposed to,

what are we going to talk about? And I go, I will talk about hip hop yoga for 45 minutes, but then I'm out. Then I've run out of things to talk about. You have to come up with something for like 10 minutes. I feel so bad for Melissa because we sat down and we were like, Melissa, thank you so much for having us. We will now speak and only us will speak for two hours. I think we also got two questions in. Two questions.

We were nervous because she was going to ask us about our workout routine or something. So we had to pivot. But then at the end, we started just like, we felt guilty and we were like, Melissa, we don't, we just lie in bed all day. I felt like it was a therapist that I was like confessing. I was like, okay, you know what?

I lied, I don't work out, I rot in bed. You're, I am bad, like help. And she knew that, she knew that we weren't going into a routine, she knew it. She said, you know what, try one thing and that's just not looking at your phone in the morning. And we were like, oh, we don't know. Kudos to her because she did some research

and she decided to go in being like, we're gonna talk about how laughter is healthy and we'll use that with these girls. And you know what, that's an angle that I will get behind. Hello listener, is it me you're looking for? As brands we're always wanting to make a connection to find the person you can rely on the one that's there every week, month or year and always has your back when you need them the most.

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I literally, sorry, I totally cut you off, but I saw that you posted that, that documentary on Netflix. I was going to bother you to watch it, but you're like, I saw that you posted that documentary on Netflix. I was gonna bother you to watch it, but you're like a cat. I watched that. If I tell you to watch something, I feel like you get kinda like, is it that good? I want you to choose it on your own.

Okay guys, American Nightmare on Netflix. Tell me everything. Paige is doing the dope doc segment today. One of the best documentaries I think I've ever seen in my life. One of the most documentaries. I think I've ever seen in my life one of the most infuriating Documentaries it made me

mmm, it physically made me like ill and mad and I was I cried during it. I Like I rage cried. I felt felt like I cried because I felt so mad for this girl. Well, it was so fascinating about too, like it was really well done, I'm not gonna give anything away, but it's about, there was a kidnapping. And first you see the perspective of the police

and the way they air it, you're like, okay, obviously this happened. And then they air it from another perspective and you're like, okay, well, obviously that happened. And then they air it from another perspective and you're like, okay, well, obviously that happened. And then they show the other perspective and you go, what the fuck is going on? But it does show you like how things can be altered so much.

I'm gonna tell you something. I know that I have a gripe with the FDI. That goes without saying. I think I have a gripe with the FBI because who's running it over there? Okay, this is kind of a spoiler, but not really At the end of the day a mom or a woman Ends up solving everything. It took one woman. It took one woman to literally do. I don't know simple Google search and

simple Google search and she's one phone call one phone call one Google search she's saved multiple people's lives the men got awards the men got awards no literally one of the police officers got police officer of the fucking year. No, no, no, no. I've been, we've been saying for a long time, and I think actually Kamma Krista Stefano has a very friendly bit about his girlfriend, and he's like, these girls are so good at figuring things out, like why are women not in charge of the FBI? And it's true, like, if you send a man to like find one thing in a grocery store, he like can't do it. And I'm like, but that man's solving murders?

Here's the other thing that women are so good at, interrogations, because I'm not, when I'm asking you a question, no, then I already know the answer. So like- No, those men were so bad at asking questions. They were just like, I'm gonna make you look like a monster, you did it. And the guy's like, what? Like a woman would have, I just, it makes me so bad.

No, we need to make some changes and the Academy needs apologies, but the one thing that was really special about this documentary is some documentaries, my biggest gripe is when they do the unsolved murders, and I'm like, so we're right where we were in the beginning, which is fucking confused. And makes you want to send a strongly worded email

to the production company. It's like, oh, you guys just couldn't figure out the ending, so this was the show you went with? I go, that's not a beginning, middle, and end. That is a premise. This documentary has such a full circle. Like, at the end, you really felt complete in your heart. And I'm not saying if it was good or bad,

but it just like came, there was an ending. It came together. And you laugh cried, you have, anyway, everyone has to watch it. It's three episodes, it's light work. You can do that in one second night. It's easy. That's a morning, that's a morning for me.

That's a dark morning. That was breakfast. Wait, speaking of crying, I had the craziest thing happen to me at the Charleston show. Tell. Charleston? Okay, my show, to make it clear, it's not about crying.

No one's, it's not crying. Maybe like excited crying, nothing else. We're having fun, we're making dick jokes. It's actually like the best crowd the girls are so funny and drunk and Then I see this like 70 year old man in the front and I'm like, okay He's like so cute And and then some girl literally yells out of nowhere and she goes Hannah. We have the same birthday And I was like August 12th and she goes, Hannah, we have the same birthday. And I was like, August 12th, and she's like, yeah,

I'm like, cool, does anyone else wanna yell out their birthdays? And some girls are yelling out, and I'm like, this is a drunk town hall meeting, this is so fun. Everyone calm down. And then later in the show, I go back to the older guy, and I'm like, what? Who are you with?

Like, he was like having fun. I'm like, who is this like Zaddy having fun? And the girls next to him, they're kind of drunk and they go, his wife passed away. So everyone's upset. Everyone's like, oh. No. And he goes, I come to comedy shows when I feel lonely.

And I was like, oh my God. And he's so cute, Paige I'm got no and then he looks at me and he goes my wife has the same birthday as you and I've never once said my birthday out loud in a show and I have this moment and I just go do you think your wife was speaking to you through me on stage. The whole audience starts sobbing. Like, he's laughing, crying, the girls are crying, everyone's very drunk so we're crying anyway, we're all hormonal, we're just like, ah!

And then I was like guys, like give it up for Steve. The whole theater of a thousand girls starts chanting, we love Steve, we love Steve. And he's like laughing with tears in his eyes, the cutest old man. And I was like, how did you find me? And he's like, I don't know, like my phone, like Instagram. I was like, it's okay, you don't have to explain it.

But like, I actually believe that shit. Like, what are the chances that his life has the same birthday as me. And I never talk about my birthday on stage. And some girl just yelled it out. It was like- And you never even, I feel like, talked to a man in the crowd.

I like saw him, and it's like we had to have a conversation, and his wife wanted me to say the birthday to let him know she's here with him. Yeah, 100%, I believe in that. I believe in that stuff all day. And I wish I could tell you guys, like, I felt something come over me. No, I was just being orchestrated. I was being orchestrated on stage by his wife, who has an amazing birthday. And then I was like, okay, we have to get the crowd back. Everyone stop fucking crying.

I have to make jokes about queefing. And did you? Yeah, it was fun. I was like, sex is crazy. But I had a great, I really did have a great time in Charleston, like it, it's very like the Hamptons. It's very picturesque. Yes, it's like the Hamptons, if it was like a lot of guys Yes, it's like the Hamptons, if it was like a lot of guys

with like hair that's like combed over. Yeah, a lot of quaffting. A lot of quaffting. And a lot of vests, a lot of vests, a lot of cordyceps. You see a lot of vests down there. But it is touristy, like, I mean, I was on King Street. So it was a lot of people shopping. It's very touristy. But yeah, the guys are very, they dress very like,

it's either ultra preppy or it's like a little beachy. But they'll have flip flops on in a vest. And it's like, what season is that for? You're confusing me. But it's a vibe. Some screws are loose. So we have a lot of traveling. I'm going to LA tomorrow for three days.

And then I'm going to Reno for a show. And then I'm going to Lake Tahoe for the first time with Des. And then I'm going to Aspen. This is my problem. I need a faux fur coat, but I'm not packing a faux fur coat, and I'm not buying a faux fur coat in Aspen for $3,000. So I'm gonna have to rob someone's faux fur coat. How did you pack a faux fur coat? What did you do? Don't say FedEx it, because I swear to God, I'm not Fed to rob someone's faux fur coat. How did you pack a faux fur coat?

What did you do? Don't say FedEx it, because I swear to God, I'm not FedExing shit. Okay, if you let me get it out, I'm gonna let you know something. I packed three fur coats, bitch. And I did not FedEx one of them, okay? The power of-

Sitting on your suitcase? Yes. What is your folding method? Just scrunch, scrunch, scrunch. And I put a lot of things. My new move is to put things in shoes. So I packed a couple pairs of boots. So I put clothes inside of the boots to save space

because I knew I had. I packed two fur coats. I wore one on the plane. Because I will go some places with my little suitcase because I'm wearing like the same outfit for three shows and then I actually went to King Street. So much fun shopping, find myself an Urban Outfitters, which I live literally next door to, right, buy a bunch of shit from Urban Outfitters, then can't fit it back in my bag.

No, actually I will say one thing about the Charleston shopping, it sucks. Strong words. It's not good, it's not good. And I think it's wild because it is such a touristy place, but like, if I'm in a pinch for a pair of shoes, I'm not getting them there. Like I genuinely, when I'm down there,

the only places I shop are TJ Maxx and Marshalls. There's no stores or anything like that. There are a lot of stores made for moms who are like, they see you and they're like, sweetheart, bless your heart, and they're drunk at 1 p.m. I like the love shack fancy vibe. Some of their things are so cute.

Love shack fancy. But I can't. Their store needs to calm the fuck down. It's a crop sweater. It doesn't need to be $400. Why don't you chill the fuck out about it? No, but the outside of the store, and I'm saying this because our brands probably don't align. So I don't think I'll lose a branding connection with them.

But it looks like a bunch of flowers just had diarrhea on each other. And it looks like a yeast infection. See I actually love the outside of the store. I think it's like such a vibe. Cause it's so girly, but it's like compared to all the other stores, it's like okay. Yeah, it's intense. It's intense, but they do have like fancy stores.

They have like Gucci and like. Yeah, but it's like, okay, yes, they do have fancy shopping, but if you're just, what I don't understand is that it's a college town, there's so many college girlies. How are they going out on the weekend? Where are they shopping? What are they getting?

They're just having everything delivered, they're shopping online. The girls don't even have Azara to go to, and it's then that I feel bad for. Yeah. You know, I wanna do this for the college girlies. They need Azara. Let's help them out, they need a fucking H&M.

Like, it's crazy. Wait, speaking of going outside, did you see Zayn Malik? He's such a giggler. What do you do? The headline is Zayn Malik makes rare public outing at Fashion Week and a car ran over his foot. Zayn Malik's foot appears to get run over during rare public appearance.

That is so giggly squad coded. Yeah. Steps out, thinks they're doing something for the fashion industry. The universe says, nope, go back home. Imagine like he never goes outside. He's scared of paparazzi. He's, he had to like go to therapy for three months to even physically go outside. And then a Uber just runs over his toe. See, I'd actually be really thankful because there's nothing I love more than like something to give me a reason for me to say

And this is why I don't go out. You know what like and this is why I don't travel you think he did it on purpose I would do that. Yeah, that's why I do when I was skiing I go oopsie and then broke my hand he took his little foot You know in your high school and you're just like so fucking nuts and you're like, you think in your head, not that you would ever do this, but you think in your head. How do I get out of school? Or like, if I just like broke my leg right now,

like, and I posted it, do you think he would text me to like see if I was okay? Like me and my best friend in high school would do such crazy shit like that to just be like, do you think like, like one time she made me come up with this like entire lie to text this guy to see if like, he would text us back and I was down for it.

Cause like, if my friend needs me to text someone, I'm gonna do it. So I came up with this entire lie that this guy's cat was in my backyard. And I was like, Hey, I think your cat's in my backyard. Like, and he was like, I don't think. He's cutting his cat. He's like, I don't think so. And I was like, that's so think you're cats in my backyard. Like, and he was like, I don't think I don't think so. And I was like, that's so crazy.

What are you doing tonight? He goes, I don't have a cat. I knew he had a cat. But that was hilarious. This one girl on tic-tac I follow, Halle is like 22, 23. And every now and then she just brings me back to those days. She was told a story about how she basically was in love with this guy who she met like once.

And she decided to follow like every account he followed that was like me pages or like interesting stuff. And then started liking everything because she wanted whenever him to see those pages to see her name that she liked it. And I was like, wow, that is so smart. And she was like, I was evil genius. And then she ended up being like, he never texted me,

but like it was like genius. No, that's genius. I've done something similar. I once was like obsessed with this guy and like he was so fucking funny. So like all of the things that he would like that he thought were funny, I would like find similar humor to like also like

and follow, cause I was like, oh, if he, if he thinks I'm funny, like he's gonna love me. And he in fact did not. I married a guy and pretended to like skiing for two years. I'm officially retired. I'm officially retired from skiing. Wait, why? Because it's unsafe and it's not fun.

No, look, there is an element now to like being in your 30s where it's like, okay, if I do legit fall and break something, I can't. I'm an adult. Yeah, like I can't have a broken leg for six months. No, literally. Like also I hurt my right arm. I couldn't even a broken leg for six months. No, literally. Like also, I hurt my right arm. I couldn't even wipe my asshole.

Like that was like pure mental physical torture. I'm at that point too, like I'm not risking my body unless it's for a gold medal in the Olympics. Otherwise, I'm sorry, she's out. And I feel bad for the girlies like Shannon Ford. She was on this like vacation skiing and she posted all these cute outfits or having so much fun and I messaged her

and I was like, I said something. And she was like, no Hannah, like skiing's so dangerous. Why don't they tell people? Like I was, she said she was hyperventilating the whole time. She never skied before? I don't think she has. Oh, that's terrifying then.

And to do it for the first time in your late 20s or early 30s, it is way scarier. Yeah, and girls, because it's good fashion, will get trapped in a situation. Next thing you know, you're on a blue and you're crying and you're praying to Saint Anthony and you're like, how did I get here for just an average dick? Like how did I get here for a below average dick? Like how did I get here for a below average dick?

No, I'm on this trip solely because I bought Prada ski goggles. Who's taking the photos is my question. Are there girls there that could take it? Yeah, there's girlies here. So like we're good. And Craig goes, you bought Prada ski goggles. When did you get those? And I was just like, don't worry about it.

And he was like, did you try them on? Like, can you see out of them? And I just looked at him and I go, I didn't try them on. They matched my snowsuit, that's why I fucking got them. Okay, pay attention, police. Like, how long have you been here? People talk about it enough with vacation. How much pressure it is to get the photo?

No, it's so much. I went to the next game with my dad and I started panicking because I was between my dad and a couple bros and I needed to get a photo and there was that one photographer guy that took one photo but it was like, you know, not the ideal angle and I was wearing a fit and it was the kind of fit that like I needed to pose cunty. Like I needed to not just like- Yeah, you need to be standing, yeah. Or like a thought squad or like something like,

like pretending I didn't see the camera shit. Men are not capable of capturing that kind of art. Imagine telling a man like, hey, I actually want this to be like a blurry photo. He'd be like, what? You know, and you're like, it's for the aesthetic, you don't get it. This is the worst thing too when you're like, just take a lot and he just like takes a ton

and then gives a two and you're like, you had no strategy to that. They all look exactly the same, but my eyes are blinking. Move a little. Yeah, I need angles, angles, lights. Also, it's perfectly normal. Like, and me and you have done this, we're like, I'll take photos of you.

We look and we go, the energy's not right. And then we will change direction, change the street, change the mental, like, what is our purpose? Like, what is our motive in this shoot? Like, we have to understand the creative direction. You can just fucking- We have to be like, what's the story? We want this photo to tell.

What's the background? Yeah, don't just finger, don't finger your phone for 30 seconds and then be like, we got it. I took so many photos. You don't like one, you don't like one photo that I took. No!

Whenever I ask Craig to take my photos, he gets me the phone back and I'm just like, oh, you just, I can't get, like you didn't get it. Like it's fine, don't worry about it. You didn't get it. I'll figure something else out. It's not your fault. It's not your fault. He had the fucking audacity to say to me the other day. Really? Because every time I take a photo for someone else, they always say that I got it and I go because women and we lie. She just wanted her phone back. She said, thanks, got it and walked walked away. We lie, like, because we don't want you to be uncomfortable.

Imagine a girl who like, enjoys Southern charm, and Craig's like, I'll take a picture of you, you're not gonna look him in the eye and be like, this photo sucks, take another one. You'll be like, thank you. I'm like, because they don't date you, okay? I can yell at you, and it's not a problem. And it's like, what, are you saying

that they're all gorgeous and I'm a fucking wild And it's like, what? Are you saying that they're all gorgeous and I'm a fucking wildebeest? Like what are you trying to say? Yeah, like, oh, what? It's me in the photo that can't figure it out? I think it's your angles, buddy. Ha ha ha. Marketers and advertisers, brands big and small.

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Also, okay, this might be offensive. Then say it. I realize why, one reason why you're really funny. And it's not just that you're like Italian. The trauma? It's because you didn't have boobs in high school. Okay. Probably true on some level.

Like to an extent. I'm gonna tell you the reason I actually am funny and it is born out of our favorite thing and that's revenge. Growing up, my brother was so funny. Like still is the funniest person I know. My dad would only laugh at Gary's jokes and I would be like, I'm funny. And my dad would be like, yeah, you're funny, but I knew I wasn't getting a legitimate laugh.

So I'm not kidding. I cultivated a fucking personality. And from just like listening to my brother, like seeing what he thought was funny. And so like that's why our humor is the exact same because I essentially just copied him because I was so competitive that no one in the house was laughing at me. And like my mom doesn't count because like,

she'll laugh at anything. It was, I needed the laughs from my dad. Okay, let me change my hypothesis to this. Okay. If you had big boobs, you wouldn't be funny. If I had big boobs, I wouldn't be here. Okay. And I say it to Craig all the time.

I also am like, if I was five nine, you wouldn't even know me. Like I would be on someone's yacht somewhere. Okay. Being like, yes, I will have another martini. Girls who had big boobs growing up, like there are funny ones for sure. But sometimes you, everyone just gave you so much positive affirmation. You never had to kind of like experiment

in a conversation to try to get attention. Like it was just like, my friend with big boobs would stretch and every guy would just like stare at her. Well meanwhile, I would have to do like seven bad jokes before someone even acknowledged me. Cause, and I do think it's like, yeah, if you had big boobs, you wouldn't even care to get Gary's attention. Like you'd be like, cool.

I think the other wild thing is, is every single one of my girlfriends from my entire life have had the most perfect huge boobs. Like I am the only one that ever was like an A that ever wore a bra A. But you know what, if you were a little less pretty, you'd be a stand-up comedian. You would have a special Netflix coming out in the fall. It'd be the girl version of Matt Rice. If you had a thicker jaw.

If I had a stronger jawline and a six pack. Oh gosh. No, but I do think it is funny because I feel like the funniest people I know, like they do have like stand-up comedians. Like most of them do have like a crazy childhood trauma. You have to have some darkness. Yeah. You have to have some darkness for sure.

But I think I have gotten funnier over the course of 10 years because of reality TV. Like I think that has really traumatized me in a way that I never knew. No, yeah. Could be traumatizing. Cause you could decide, go in two ways be like okay This is really sad or make fun of yourself and start a podcast and have other girls who want to distract themselves from their

Yeah, like self-deprecation makes me feel Better like makes me I think it's funny and I think and it makes me feel like more grounded Yeah, I have to get deeper into like the boob analogy you guys can message me because I do have let me just say I have so many friends With big boobs who are so fucking funny, but I was just specifically thinking of you and your upbringing I have to also make an apology to the Academy So you're talking about common last week and I just started singing I'm the man I'm the man I'm the man that I'm the man, I'm the man. That is another artist, and his name is Al O Black.

Common did not sing that song. Also, how crazy that Common's just all over the fucking internet now dating Jennifer Hudson. I talk about one man on the podcast. He was trying to make you jealous. He was trying to make you jealous right now. No, I was literally like, you didn't have to go on the Today Show to say you had a girlfriend. Dude, Charlie Puth got engaged to make me jealous.

Like that's crazy. Guys, chill out. To a brunette too. It's like calm down, like live your own life. It is so funny though. Like what a random chain of events. So like I met him on the plane, talk about him, and then all of a sudden he's on this massive press tour.

I feel like I haven't seen Common in five years, now he's everywhere. She goes, did I put Common back on the map? He's getting a Grammy this year. They're like, he doesn't even have a song. I'm like, he's a man of the people. Also, eyelashes. Yes.

Isn't it crazy how everyone, remember when we first started Summer House, like you had these big gorgeous lashes? My eyelash extensions. Now the style is no mascara. How did we go from so much eyelashes to no, like what's going on? Talk about like when I hate my outfit,

it'll ruin a night. I can specifically remember one night in my 20s that I was at a club and I forgot to put mascara on and it haunts me and it still haunts me. I've done that and you're just like, how can no one tell me that I'm just out here? Literally one of my girlfriends said, was this on purpose that you don't have mascara on right now and I go, I can't believe you're just like, how can no one tell me that I'm just out here? Literally, one of my girlfriends said, was this on purpose that you don't have mascara on

right now, and I go, I can't believe you're bringing attention to it, but I literally forgot, and I'm staring at my face being like, what's missing, and I couldn't figure it out. You've done foul eyeshadow with an, oh! No mascara. Full eyeshadow, full brows, no mascara. I don't know what was going on,

but I think about it all the time at Hansing. That's like me when I leave the shower with just one shaved leg, but I was just I just think it's crazy But I also do think that everyone looks best with like just mascara Like I remember when you didn't wear your eyelash extensions once I straight up was like oh my god You look gorgeous. What'd you do differently? But it was just cuz sometimes it could be a too the eyelashes, where instead of seeing someone's face. Eyelash extensions are out. Like, it's, I get how addicting it is

and how like looking at yourself in the mirror without them, you're like, I'm a naked mole rat. Luckily, I went through the phase of like no eyelash extensions right when COVID hit, because then like I couldn't get them. So I just went natural and then I never went back. Also, everyone's getting really fancy, cool nails. And you know I love to jump with a nail bandwagon. But I just realized, how fucking long does it take

when you're getting a full vintage two hours. A full vintage store on your nail. Three hours. Like when I get gel X, it takes two hours. And I'm not even saying I don't have the time, like I'm not that busy. I don't have the mental fortitude. Yeah. To sit there.

And I'll sit on my couch for hours, which is hilarious. But to sit, I get my nails done. There's something about it. Because you do have to be present. You do have to watch what they're doing because you have to move your finger correctly for them. And you have to be like, you can't just have like, one thing I'll, I hate at a nail salon.

This is very niche. But I feel like I've gone to nail salons enough to survey the situation. If you're sitting there and you're getting, like it's a long process. I totally get having your headphones on and like you're scrolling TikTok or like you're doing something on your phone.

You're there for two hours, that's fine. I'm sure the nail tech doesn't give a fuck that you're not talking to her. It's the girls that are like full on phone calls, full on on their phone to the point where they're not paying attention. And you can see that the nail tech has to be like, put your finger over here, I hate that.

It's like, they don't work for you. You're literally just paying them to do a service for you in this current moment. Like, pay attention. And I'm like, oh. I've gone to some crazy places where people are straight up on speakerphone, like fighting with their boyfriend.

I mean, it's quite entertaining actually. But that reminds me like, every now and then we'll get our makeup done and someone will be like, oh, you guys are like so good at getting your makeup done. And I'm like, that's not a skill. And they're like, no, there's so many people who will be like moving their head on their phone.

Like they move while someone's doing their makeup. Like I know exactly what time, what, when it's time to look up, look down, look to the side. Like I'm right there with you girl. Like I, we're working for the same cause. I'm in a full homeostasis mode of luxury. I am not moving, I'm not calling my parents back. I am in the zone.

I do fuck up though, they'll be like, look up and I look down and you feel so dumb. Yeah, and they're like, it's okay. But I do feel like some like my makeup artists and hairstylists, I feel like have become really good friends because there is something about like someone touching your face or your head. Like when we get our makeup done in random cities with random makeup artists that we've met that day. If anyone DM to them, they know everything. They know every, like we just spew because we feel very comfortable sitting in the chair and we're like, sorry, we're going to talk major shit right now.

Or we'll be like, Hey, let's like not talk shit. And then five minutes in, we're talking shit. We're like, do you know that girl? And they're like, yeah, no, I've seen her. And we're like, oh. That's bad. It's literally girlhood though. It's just like girls being girls.

It's girlhood. Speaking of girlhood, I just have to bring up capitalism for a second. I love it. Bring it up. Because this is my first year in the fashion industry. And I'm fucking tired. I'm tired. So first we all had to get red.

And it took me forever because at first I was like, you can't just pick a color and make everyone wear it. But then everyone's wearing it and it low key looks cool. And then I realized like, okay, it's pretty easy to just fucking buy red and then people like think you're cooler. So then I got on the red train and I finally bought all this red shit and then Paige shows up to Melissa Wood Health podcast in Leopard and I go, fuck.

Now I have to change my horval of drove and get Leopard. I saw Leopard going around and I said, no, I'm not letting this happen. Leopard is, like we've done it so many times, like red was chic, red was chic, Leopard is not. And then you walk in with it And you looked fucking good right now. I want an Amazon. I ordered a leopard shirt. Is red owl. Yeah It's not yeah, it's not out yet

Here's the thing that I think the fashion community or that the girlies need to know about the fashion community Yeah, when you're looking at Haley Bieber or you're looking at whoever you look to for style in Spoe, they are wearing the trends a full year earlier. Okay, so right now everyone's like, ma boy, aesthetic, ma boy, aesthetic. Haley Bieber was wearing full length furs last year, taking pictures for Christmas. So that's how like an easy way to stay up.

Once it hits the stores, once you can buy the shit in stores, it is essentially out because now the masses can get it. So once it's accessible to the masses, it's no longer in in terms of the fashion community. But also I am on the side of TikTok where it's like, I'm done with all the aesthetics. I'm done with the trends. I'm done with all that shit. Like be yourself, which I will say, I do fall, but I do love trends

cause I love trying something funky and then being like, okay, I'm never gonna wear that again. But like I tried it and it was cool. Also you wanna look cute and if you find the outfits are cute and I actually been loving like the 90s stuff, but my thing is like. Like, okay, perfect example is I wore underwear You know, I'm not sure if you're wearing a dress or not. But I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure.

I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure.

I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure.

I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. because it was in a year ago. Yeah. So it's like you, and it's not that people can't get it. It's more like the masses doesn't know they should get it. And then once it becomes cool, then it's in the Zara's and the H&M's. Right. And then, but this is the thing.

Do you ever feel manipulated? Like there's some people in a room and they go, OK, everyone's bought red, like Hannah hasn't bought red in like two months, she has enough red, what do we need Hannah to buy next? Leopard, put on Hailie Weeper, put it on. Have you ever watched Devils Wears Prada? Everything is hand selected for you from a group of people

and you don't even know it. You might not think you're in the fashion community, but you are. Okay? Somebody pulled that lumpy sweater out of a bargain bin that you're wearing. The fashion community is so bad. Also, finally, we forgot last week, worst wife ever, does drop to special on YouTube for free.

Wait, wait, I need to watch. It is so fucking good. First of all, I need to watch. It is so fucking good. First of all, I'm the executive producer, which is kind of a big fucking deal. Yeah. Treat me differently, that's fine. Address me differently, for sure. Mrs. Executive Producer.

Wait, wait, it just flashed in my brain I think for the first time ever that you're Mrs. Bishop. No, I didn't take his last name. But like, we'll go to hotels and they'll be like, Mr. Mrs. Bishop, or they say Mr. Mrs. Burner, which honestly gets me off.

I love that. I'm like, Mr. Burner, come here. This is your wife. So we put it in the newsletter and then I told the giglers I was like let's go old school and Pear Bomb Des is special because I thought it was funny and because Des used to be caddy daddy back in the day and Des was laughing and it was like a good throwback but I highly recommend I'm like I'm so proud of his

special it is so fucking funny he if you've never seen Des do comedy this is the time so go to his YouTube Des Bishop it's called of all people on YouTube if you listen pair bomb it or say something nice about the executive producer in the comments it could be it could be rooted back to Giggis what is. Is there anything else? No, I'm going skiing tomorrow, so pray for me. No, I will pray for you. I'm literally just doing it so I can wear my freaking

Prada goggles, get the pic, and then I'm going down once, maybe twice, and then I'm done. No, that's the thing. I could do once or twice. It's when you're doing it for four hours, I'm like, no one's even winning. No, it's not. We're just surviving and then trying to survive again.

A game where it's like a sport that there's no competitiveness of like winning? I don't give a shit. You're just trying not to break your neck and then you get to the bottom and they go, good, you didn't break your neck, do it again. And I'm like, what's the point? It's just like what?

At least give me a cone to go around or something. Yeah. He's put me on a race. I mean, you just go straight down. At one time, last time I went skiing, the one instructor was like, okay, here's the thing, I'm going to need you to stop doing everything you're doing. I think my ski sparked at one point because I couldn't stop. I was going so fucking fast. He was like, so you don't know how to stop. I go, well, clearly.

Cause we're at the bottom of the mountain by now. So clearly I can't stop. Anyhow. Girls, stay safe out there. Gaglers, we love you. Thank you for all the love about the Netflix. I literally couldn't have done it without you guys and we're in it together.

We have to pick an outfit. We have to pick a title. We have to make a whole stand-up set. We have a lot of shit to do, guys. So I'm so excited. We literally show up. We have to show up. Crazy.

It's not on Zoom. Thank you for giggling, guys, and we'll talk to you next week. Bye. Thank you for giggling guys and we'll talk to you next week. Bye!