Giggly Squad - Giggling about Paige’s dog, doing dishes, and interventions

Episode Date: August 18, 2026

Hannah hosted a (takeout) dinner party and Paige is getting something off her chest.shop summer merch Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What's up gigglers? Gary, fix the Wi-Fi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed. Hello, my gregarious gigglers. I've said that one. Yeah, sometimes they say things out loud, and I think, am I a doomsday prepper? No.

Because that just actually worried me. That actually just made me really nervous. Before the pot. We need a before the pod pod. No. Because I can't review it every time. I think it's just grace doing a solo. pod and it's before the pod

and she's like this is what they said before we hit record and it was scary page was like can I record the zoom with like one bar and I'm like no no so she's like okay I was like do you have double A batteries because I know myself I don't just have double A batteries lying around

she goes I do and she like pulls out some pink batteries I'm just kidding but you you have you pull out what is it called your drill your drill you have a pink drill you have a You love putting things together. I've emasculated so many men just based on my battery collection. Why do you have so many batteries?

I haven't met a man that has a toolbox compared to mine in years. How proud is Gary? My dad, oh. He loves it. He loves when I, like, okay, the other day, I'm at Joe's house, and I'm like, I hate this room. Like, I just, I hate this room. I can't look at it. it anymore like it's so it's just so boyish and like bland and whatever i'm like you have no color

you have no life and so i was like i'm rearranging the couch and he was like totally like do whatever you want i will help you do anything and i'm like okay cool so like five minutes later he's like i have to take a quick phone call i'm gonna go upstairs like he goes upstairs i'm like i could fucking do this i rearranged the entire room i threw out everything from his bookshelves I ordered like art. I ordered chairs. I ordered a rug. I'm just like, if I want something done, I'm doing it.

Very lesbian coded of you, the fact that you were able to take out your drill, rearrange your whole room. Like, they get shit done and the lesbian allegations continue today. He came down from his call. He goes, whoa. He goes, you moved this by yourself. I go in 10 minutes. In 10 minutes. I found three of Kitty's toys under here and she is happy.

By the way, Paige is tiny. Like, if you meet her in person, you're like, oh, my God, she's, like, and this, she's lifting a sectional five-seater. I'll drag anything. You give me your arch nemesis, I'll fucking drag her, bitch. That and a cloud couch. So I know, our cloud couch is worth it. Wait, can we bring something up? Because I found myself on a Reddit thread.

I think they are the most vile couch to ever exist. And here's the other thing. Joe has a dog. And let's just take a moment of silence for that. Wait, wait, wait. Are we announcing it to the pod? The Joe's a dog? Yeah.

I mean, I guess. It's just like something I've been living with silently. No, she's been suffering in silence. This dog is up my asshole. Okay. The dog loves Paige. The dog sees Paige and the dog goes, that's my mother. And Paige is like, we're not blood related.

And we have no relation. I don't know. you I wasn't there the day you got taken home I like I have no connection to you we were adding a character to the giggly universe right now do you want to introduce his name we can't just call him the dog or we can no he is the dog I'm also his name I'm like when I met him I go really that's what they named you so that was the biggest issue we've been dealing with well the biggest issue is really when I had to tell Kitty about it. And she was like, what?

She was. And in true, here's the thing. You never get a preview of like what your children could be like. And that is like scary and sad to me. Like I wish you could get like a 30 second teaser once they tell you you're pregnant. They're like, and this is what your child would be like. I feel like I do have a small snippet into the future watching Daphne because the way She's made this dog her absolute bitch is like she does things and I'm proud.

I'm proud. She bullies him and I'm like stand her ground. I came in very like if they're going to meet. Like we have to get safety protocols. Like we have to protect Daphne in all costs. She literally has like brand deals on the way. And like it then it becomes like a monetary thing and someone's going to get sued. Like I don't we need insurance.

There is a period of time where you couldn't talk about it. You were like I. No. was like very nervous and no and let me tell you I did research so much research I in I really actually probably played it too slow like to the point where the pets were like oh we know the other ones there like also mind you before I met this dog I thought it was a rottweiler like I was like it's an 150 pound rotwiler I'm so scared how are we going to even like have them ever in the same room It's a 35-pound scaredy cat.

Like, it's literally the biggest baby. Kitty, like, literally licks her paw and he runs to the corner. No, Kitty, when he walks by, like, fakes. Like, she's going to, like, come for him. And he starts, like, be like, oh, you know, she fakes him out and then slaps him across the face and walks away. She's like, what's that? She throws a ball.

He turns around. She goes, I don't even throw a ball, you dummy. Yeah, he's like, that's my girl. Anyway, what were we even talking about that I... You just, like, out of nowhere, it was, like, there's a dog in my life. That's why I, like, when the pods in the morning, because I'm so raw. I'm so real. I know, you're so vulnerable.

I'm like, I've been living in a hellscape. This dog. Wait, can I tell them how I almost accidentally killed the dog? Yeah, Peter, take a break from this because then I have a story where I accidentally almost, like, had the dog run away. No, so Paige was joking. He's like, I love this guy, but I don't know if I could be in a relationship with someone who has a dog. No, this is a serious conversation that, like, I thought about. I was like, I can't.

And then I was like, do we give him an ultimatum? Are we like, it's mere the dog? There was a moment where I'm like, I'm not a monster. No, but also this isn't just a dog to this man. Like, this dog is his son. This dog is his ever. Like, this dog, he loves this dog more than anything. This morning, he said to me, last night you were.

were really mean to the dog. Do you want to apologize? I said, I'm not apologizing to a dog. What did you do? Were you like cash get out of the room? I said, get off the bed. See, that's also the problem. Kitty's a lot on the bed because she smells like pancakes.

I don't know where that dog's been. That dog's been outside. Kitty's poop and pee pee paws allowed on my face. It's my gridarm abrasion. Okay. A dog that's out in the wild. I don't know where that dog's been. Okay, we finally have like an event where we're celebrating like the dog and the cat have met.

Yeah, what are we doing? Oh, we're at Easter. It was Easter. So this is, at the end of the day, I love animals because I'm not a fucking monster. Of course. So I go all the way to this pet store and I'm like, what do dogs like? Like they're boys. I'm like, I'll get him a food something.

I don't know. So they have all these like doggy treats. Of course there's like no cute cat treats. It's all for dogs, but like whatever, that's the patriarchy. So I get this like, you guys, I got a canoli for a dog. Like they make dog canola. Like, that was the cutest gift ever. I was so excited.

So I'm outside with the dog. You were meeting an Italian dog. You said, let me into your culture. I was like, okay, if we're going to be family members, like, this is how I'm going to connect with you. So I'm outside with the dog and I'm like giving it the canoly. And the dog The dog like puts the whole thing in its mouth

And starts choking And then like The dog starts like And then I'm like Oh no I can't kill the fucking dog on Easter So then I'm like I'm doing whatever And then the dog's literally fine And then the dog eats all the canoli

But like for a second there I was like Paige things were about to be I was about to take care of everything for you And then the rest of the day I got blamed for hiring a hip man to come to my Easter dinner and kill a member of my family. Also, I do have to say, Des loves this dog. Des, everyone that meets this dog loves this dog. So it's been complicated to say the least, but I also think it's been a lesson of acceptance

and that we should love tolerance. other people and other things i didn't pick this dog like yeah i didn't pick this dog i have no i have no mother connection to this dog like oh my god it was there the day you were born like i do with kitty but just because you didn't birth it doesn't mean in all seriousness like very cute dog very well-behaved dog that's like what i care the most about and like obsessed with kitty and so nice to kitty yeah it did so much research on introducing kitty and this dog like specific breeds i called a psychic this is the right move yeah we got the whole team on board you have to do so much it i actually did it over the course of like oh my god probably like nine months which like you can do

it shorter of course but i was just so scared you can't rush it the first thing i did was like take two items of each of theirs and like swap it so they could smell it and then like I would only hold her and he could like see that she was there then I like introduced them through like a screen it was a slow process but when I tell you you guys they sleep together now no now they're like obsessed with each other but there are dogs out there that just don't fuck with cats that like it doesn't matter how much scent swapping you do they're going to eat your cat do not dabble I think this is like a very specific situation with this dog's specific personality. Yeah.

I just got really lucky. It also, it's giving like the universe was like, okay, we'll make this, we'll make this blended family work. But it's so girls versus boys. Let me just tell you.

And me and kitty are trying to hold it down, but the patriarchy is strong. Okay, because we're used to quiet. We're used to soft sounds in the morning. We've never played ball. You know, like, we don't... Kitty learned what a dirty tennis ball was.

Yeah, Kitty was like, no. But my dream is to have a dog and a cat that become friends. Like, that's my algorithm. Yeah. Seeing them together. And it seems very Romeo Juliet. Like, nobody wanted to see us together, but it doesn't matter, no, because I got you, babe, Acon. Like, sometimes I'm like, you guys are giving Kim and Kanye in the best thing.

No, like, it's at a point where I'm like, I think she's... flirting with him. Yeah, like the one, like the first time ever, and this is like a few months ago, that Kitty like laid fully on her back in front of the dog. I was like, Kitty, stop. Up her up. Stop. Let's have some self-respect in this household. Yeah, let's have some decency here. Speaking of cats, wait, I have an announcement. I'm doing an event. Oh, honey, you're hosting an event. I'm hosting an event, which you know I never do. No, that's so adult. of you. This morning you were like, let me get a coffee and then we can chat. And I was like, in my head, I was like, that's so adult. Now you're hosting a goddamn event. Well, look, I'm in the

Hamptons. And this is what you do. You get into society. You're literally in Luan right now. I know, I was like, darling, I have to do some philanthropy this summer. You got like a prop cigarette. I have a fidora. You're like, don't worry. It's not real. So, okay, this Friday, August 21st. So my bestie in town owns the Pilates Studio. That was convenient for me to be like, I'm becoming friends with you

because you're badass and cool. Sound body Hampton, shout out. It's actually the hardest place to get into in West Hampton. I can't even get a reservation at this point. So she had to expand and she got this whole huge back area that she's like, I want to throw an event.

Mind you, you know I'm in with South Hampton Animal Shelter every day, Kiki, checking cats that I want to adopt. seeing and kitten season is now like for some reason I guess I don't know what it is but like sorry I shot kitten season hot girl summer I've never I've just heard you never heard a kitten season I've never heard those words together in a sentence it's kidding season I don't know if it's like the weather or something but like all the cats are having babies right now so there's kittens everywhere and like we need to get them adopted wait this is a stupid question yeah are cats pregnant for nine months our I'm pregnant for nine months.

But that's such a good question. No, there's no way. That's such a good question. Hey, Siri. How long are cats pregnant for? 64 days. Now, if I could... Dude, they're living the goddamn life.

If I could be pregnant for 64 days, I would have four. I would have four. I would be Ballerina Farm's worst nightmare. Are you kidding? Wait, how long have you been awake? because you were awake right now. I just woke up.

Here's the thing. I didn't really sleep well last night. So I'm delo. I bet up. You're on a bender. You're on a bender right now. You are cracking me the fuck up right now. No.

I've organized four drawers. I'm like, I'm like, is this a dream? Am I dreaming right now? Wait, imagine a cat's like, I'm 36 days. No, that's so she. I'm 36 days. my god well that's why that's why there's so many kittens no nine months is like come on well so as you guys know when i retire i'm always wanted to like open my own cat cafe or like a cat sanctuary or like

something da-da-da so i'm like this friday from 12 to 2 in westampton i'm doing hannah's cat cafe where we're bringing a ton of adoptable kittens to this place and we're getting like coffee and treats and like there's like a jewelry person and like I think we're trying to get like an aura reader like whatever we're trying to just make it fun but if you're by West Hampton you have to get a pet psychic we have oh my god I mean hello I think I also might do a painting and like auction it off for the shelter I don't know wait wait okay so last year remember does you're gonna paint it well do you remember does got me like painting supplies for my birthday and then remember how good you were in New Orleans and I was so good New Orleans and I was so good New Orleans and I was so good New Orleans Orleans even though you rushed me. Hannah was an hour and a half. I was like, I wasn't even done with the shading. I wasn't done with the shadows and the shading. And you were like, I want a bignet.

I was three bignets deep. I couldn't breathe. I had to go. You called an ambulance in the middle of my, my watercolor. So, yeah, it's going to be so fun. There is like a capacity thing where like we can't have it. So there's this guy. his name's Fire Marshal and like...

So I don't know about the capacity, but I want the girls to be able to come in, take photos, Kiki, pet some cats. So no Pilates. No, no, no, babe. We're not doing Pilates. I didn't know if it was like Pilates with like cats on top of you.

And also I've been doing, I've been doing preparation for the event. I've been going to the Southamil shelter just to like, because I work there now. Because I'm like in business with them. 100% of the proceeds are going to them. So we're just like partying. And there's a 20-year-old cat named Ethel.

And she meows like this. She goes, because she's had it. When you visit her, she comes out and goes up to you, meows like that. I'm not going to do it again. And then she just wants to be picked up and held. Yeah. She's just like someone fucking carry me. I can't walk anymore.

What color is she? She's like a tortoise shell. She's perfect. And they said she already has like 10 applications for her. but if she's, I'm going to bring her, I would literally, is going to adopt her. So anyway, um, I can't believe you haven't fostered this summer. Well, it's because I have, I have the children here. Oh, I forgot to tell you guys.

No. The reason I'm wearing a lip stain right now, shout out Wonderskin, whimsical. I get on the, I get on the pod, mind you, it's the morning time. It's like, we get on at like 845 and Hannah's like talking to Grace and I look at her and I'm like, do you have a lip on and she goes well yeah because lois is here and she goes did you did you brush your hair i'm like yeah lois has demands of me and expectations she's like well my boss is riding me pretty hard today i woke up i go hannah has a meeting because now if i say podcast she's going to be like well you're doing it with me so you have a meeting and she goes are you going to brush your hair and yesterday i swear god She goes, I goes my smile better.

And she goes, well, your lips are chapped. So she's like, I can't get past anything. So our game that we do is she's Paige, I'm me. And she goes, we have to podcast. So I've been podcasting all weekend. And I go, hi, welcome to Giggly Squad. I'm Hannah Burner. And she goes, I'm Paige to Sawboat.

And then I'm like, what do you want to talk about? And she looks at me to like come up with the topics. I'm like, you're so Paige. Yeah. And then one point she goes, pretend. I fell asleep during the pod. I go, I don't have to pretend. It's definitely happened.

And during Zoom meetings, too. It was one time, Hannah. And I was on a time zone difference. And you know that. Okay, it was twice. It was twice. Both time zone issues. You guys, my family left.

And then I don't know if there's been news because I've, I've been a single mom. I haven't been watching the news. A tornado went through. Yeah. Or so they say. That? Now I'm like, was there a tornado?

Did you guys just want to come back? Yeah. But there was a tornado. Trees hit their car, hit their roof. And they were like, hey, we have nowhere to live. Like, can we come back? And Des and I were like, yeah, we miss you guys. Come back.

So we are our own blended family here. They're back. I'm actually going to add right now a snippet of Lois and I's podcast that I recorded. We recorded a podcast. Now, Paige, I've to ask you a question. Are you a girl's girl? Yes. Why do you love girls so much?

Because they're so pretty. And what do you think about the boys? No. What should we do with the boys? Take us for a time out. That's what I said. Oh, and there's our producer, Bobby. Bobby, can you say Giggly Squad?

Guy's shot. I thought you're going to be like, and I'll add a GoFundMe link because I'm dying over here. It's like, we're drowning. Then she was like pressing all the buttons and Bobby's the producer. So Bobby comes in. He can be a little bit bossy and a little loud too. Yeah.

But they're adorable. That's just, oh, wait, on the pod, on the pod I go, she looks to me, she goes, we're best friends, right? And I go, yeah, we love each other. And she goes, but we don't hug. I said, Lois, where did you hear that? She was like, she must have overheard me, like, jokingly telling Jeannie or my mom about how, like, me and you don't hug. But I'm like, she's, these kids listen to everything.

No, they're sponges, the little freaks. They're rushing spies, that's what they are. They absorb it all. She's all like, I can't speak. Yeah, you and page on hug, even though you love each other. It's like your weird thing. I'm like, can you speak or no? One day I'm wiping her ass the next day she's explaining to me,

my podcast is. She's like, Hannah, quick thing. The meaning of life is, Lois, you couldn't use a fork yesterday. No,

I think it's fascinating that like when you have kids, you don't talk to them until they're like three. Like, you talk to them, but they don't say any, like they can't tell you back. But then one day they just respond.

Yeah. That must be crazy. Like, you don't. know what their personality, I feel like truly is until they start talking. And it's like, it's so interesting that like for two years in your own home, you have the stranger, the small person. But you do kind of know their personality like without them speaking. Yeah. Do you? Like Bobby is hilarious. I'll just just chuck himself around. Like yeah, you don't, it's like when you meet someone who

doesn't speak your language. You like know the vibe. Yeah, yeah. Okay, got it. Bobby like speaks like, like really mumbles right now. Mm-hmm. So like only Lois can understand him. So Lois literally will, what's the word? I don't translate. She'll translate for him. So he'll come up to me and be like,

and I look at Lois and she goes, he wants spaghetti with parmesan and milk and he wants to eat right now. And I go, okay. Lois is probably like, Bobby's also wondering about your shirt. She's like, okay, we know he didn't say that, did he though? He might have. I go, you added that.

You added it at the end. Lois, she goes, no, he said it. He's concerned about what this look is. No, I'm obsessed with, like, in my head making Lois, like, this evil villain. Well, she is controlling. Like, she's just this baby genius. No, she, you should see her when she's, like, sees me. She's, like, something's not working.

I don't know what it is. Throw in a necklace. She's like, oh no, it's worse. Okay, so I have a question. Okay. Has anyone actually known what they're supposed to wear to anything in like the last five years? Absolutely not. Because I feel like our generation has completely just like dress code is a lost art.

No, there's no dress code anymore. And every invite, I feel like even if it's like drinks, it's like, okay, am I wearing jeans? Am I wearing heels? Is this secretly a wedding? You can't prepare. Yeah, and everyone's pretending they're chill while also texting six people asking, what are you wearing? Which is why I always check Revolve first. I feel like they somehow nail that effortless but still hot vibe. Everything's already styled in a way that makes sense. So I'm not trying to piece together an outfit from 15 different websites and open tabs everywhere. Yeah, and I love that if you find one piece, it immediately gives you similar options. you can build the whole look, women in the stem of the week.

Which is ideal because I have decision fatigue by like 10 a.m. They have all the brands we actually wear. Like Agold, Halsa, ALC, Norma Kamali, so many new arrivals every day. And whether you need a dress, matching set, or something for vacation, it's all there. And I always convince myself I need just one more option, which somehow turns into four,

but the fast shipping and easy returns make it zero stress. I wore this Hilsa bathing suit cover up, and I'm not kidding, it's the number one bathing suit cover up that people DM me about. I've worn it on the beach, worn it to the pool. Honestly, I could wear it as a dress if I really wanted to. And I felt like I had my life together when I was in this outfit because so many people loved it. Whether it's a girl's night, a date, or one of those I need to look hot, but not like I tried too hard moments. Revolve always has it. Go to revolve.com slash Gigli and use code Gigli for 15% off your first order, fast shipping, easy

returns it just works that's revolve.com slash giggly you can shop our faves and get 15% off your first order offer end September 1st don't miss out um Nutella came out with ice cream so I just need everyone to know about that have they done a collab with lactate yet no they have it well that's next wait should we just shut down the pod because Nutella came out with ice cream it's just like I don't feel like enough people are telling me about it specifically I'm like you know reaching out to you. Yeah, like, you definitely saw this. You know what's funny is my brother is, like, if you go to his house or like he's coming over

to stay with you, you're getting a weird sweet treat in the freezer after he's gone that like you've never even seen in the grocery store. It's one of the best characteristics I've ever met in a human. Does he share it or it's like something he just brought for himself? No, no, no. He's like, oh, I saw this. I like thought that you would like, Like one day he came over and he left and he left the most insane ice cream collab.

I'm like, where did you even find this? And he's like, I had to Google it. No, it literally, it was like ego waffles and like, I'm like they don't even make ice cream. And for breeze. And I just think that's a personality trait in people that's, it's overlooked. And I don't know many people like that. Well, speaking of food. I have to name drop.

Yeah. Yeah, I celebrated my birthday with Bobby Flea. Yeah. I saw that we didn't even talk about it. So shout out Bobby Flea, a friend of the pod, an avid Gigley Squad listener. There's a couple people that listen to Giggly Squad that like he's one of them and John Stamos is one of them. That I'm like, what? No, but he literally was like, it's really educational.

And I was like, Bobby Fly, you're a feminist king. You know what? In its own weird way it is. And his girlfriend, Brooke, is badass. She's a chef too, right? She's a chef on her own. She's like killing it on food network shows. But she plays tennis.

So, and she's come to my like stand-up shows before. So Brooke and I were becoming buddies. And it were both Leo's. It was both our birthdays. So they were like, come over. We're having people over. Oh my God. That's so cute.

No. So Des and I drove over. and like we played tennis and then Bobby's like making food for everyone. Like what? Like what do you make? Okay, he made. Like give like a, yeah, give like the vibe. Oh my God.

First of all like when you get there is he like, oh here I have like appetizers but I'm also cooking like the main thing or is it like everything's out? I have to say is like make friends with a chef. Yeah. You need like one or even just someone in your friend group who can cook because these people like they love it like you know where you're like Hannah can you make dinner and I'm like what did I do to deserve this yeah like he's this is how he expresses love like you come to his place and he's he's been cooking who knows since midnight who knows how long he's been cooking

he's starting off it's not even appetizer it's just a soft shell crab sandwich with saracha aoli but he's Bobby Flay so he's like yeah I chew some you know some crab on a bun and I'm like this is like a five-star restaurant appetizer oh you want some shit you got you have some you have some you know one thing I love that chefs do they're like whatever you have in your refrigerator and I'm like okay so ketchup and orange juice like what the fuck am I going to do with that I have a bazillion questions because I don't know this life so I'm like when was the last time you you door dashed like when was the last time literally let's just get Chinese food and they were like what's a door dash like they're there's two professional chefs in the household

It's crazy. I asked Martha Stewart that one time and she, I think that's the moment where she was like, how don't fuck with this girl? She coughed on you. She was like, walk. She was like, I've never done it. But he's, so he's cooking,

we're all just like hanging out. And there's a beautiful island that it's, it's like a shit, whatever. And I was like, I have to make a joke, but it's going to be risky. Because he's like working his ass off, right?

And you know, Des is looking at me. And I'm like, now I represent Des, too. So like if this bomb's like we're, this is us that I'm bringing down. And I just go, Bobby,

don't forget the seasoning like last time. hilarious. Like, are you kidding? Mike drop crowd stopper. Literally killed. Bobby's laughing. I was like, let's get out. Let's end on top.

Crush. Because like it was risky because it started. You know when it's like quiet and like. And like imagine they didn't hear you? No. And you guys, as a female comedian, as a female comedian, because your voice sometimes just like goes. He's never heard.

He's never heard. And then like some guy repeats it. And I'm like, great. Okay, cool. So he's laughing. Then he brings out one of these like chef, like huge, you know, those like crazy salt pepper shakers they have like in Italy that's like mahogany. I think, I'm going to say like a chef hat. Yeah.

Yeah. And I go, that's what I'm talking about. That's not something you forgot the salt. And they're loving it. It's because like I love a food joke. I love a food joke. I know about eating. You joke about what you know.

It's relatable. It's funny because it's true. So then I met Sophie Flee, which is. The reason why. Isn't she the sweetest? Well, this is the thing about Sophie Fly. She's page-coded. Yeah.

From the moment I met her, I said, I feel like you're my little sister that I never wanted, never had. The reason I know she's page-coded is because when she walked in, I didn't hear her. She was floating. Pages have really light steps. Like, they can just come up behind you. I didn't see it. They're like, do-d-d-d-d-this-the-s.

The Disney music when they walk. That's how she walked in My dad says I glide I've had to have like meeting sit downs with roommates Where they're like how do you wake everyone up When you go up the stairs And it's unnecessary and it's weird Like I had actual roommate meetings about that

Like people have thought you've like done it on purpose People think you're mad a lot Yeah they're like Why are you slamming the ground as you walk And I'm like it's generational trauma So also she comes in and she's wearing an accessory. Now Hannah's, we love accessories, but we're not like committed to the accessory. Also, we're not wearing like any hat that's going to fit our head.

This was one of those things that like you could tell she got online and was like, I know it's going to look good on me. She's wearing it's like a little straw hat thing that like looked perfect with her outfit. Like a bucket hat? Yes. Like a little bucket hat that she wore the entire dinner because it was like part of her outfit. Yeah. What was she wearing? See, that's the thing.

I'm not like pageco enough to like remember the full outfit. When someone's telling me a story and I'm really into it and then I say, and what were they wearing? Just no. My heart rate is going. I'm like so excited to hear the next. No, like I don't remember what I saw. I remember how they made me feel and I remember feeling like. I bet she was wearing like some type of like white something like linen dress or like.

Probably. It was light. It was cute. But she also, she wasn't overdressed. It was very like effortlessly she. Casual. And it was to the point where like I was talking to her and midway, I was like, you're, let's just be on.

Let's say what we're trying to say. You're page coded. And I was like, I know you interviewed her at the Devil Wars Prada premiere. I was there too. She's like, where were you? I'm like, who knows? Yeah. Not asked to do the interview.

That's for sure. Wait, I was shitting myself. You were shitting. You're shitting in front of Merrill Streep. I'll never forgive you. Heidi Klum. Literally, I'm trying of Heidi Klum.

So that was incredible. I love him and his girlfriend. That sounds like fun. One thing I learned because I love being around really cool, interesting people and I was asking him questions. You know, like the first time you hang out, you don't ask them any questions. You're just like, right.

Trying to be a fun time. Second time you're like, let's check under the fillet. What's the top of like a... The bum? Of a grill. Oh. Who knows?

Who knows? Who knows? Who knows? Keep going. I was asking him, like, you know, in your shows, like, how involved are you with, like, the creative, like the set, like, the editing? And he's like, Hannah, I'm on all of it. And that's why I think some people are sick.

He's the Beyonce of cooking. Like, yeah. Beyonce's not just putting out, just like putting her name on stuff and letting it go. Like, he's detailed-oriented and passionate. And, you know, he was kicked. out of school just because he didn't get school. And I was like, neither did Paige. And no, I really didn't.

And he was like, I just knew I wanted to be creative and like use my hands. And I just was like, this book stuff isn't for me. And now he's. I would literally sit in high school classes and think, I'm never going to need this, but you guys might. So like, you should pay attention. I'm obsessed with you because people in the comments every now and then would be like, kind of think she's funny making fun of page not being able.

to read. And I was like, sorry I'm raising awareness that you can do anything you put your mind to without being literate. Also, like, that's who we are. We make jokes when there's jokes to be made. Yeah, I'm not going to miss an opportunity to ask Paige to spell. No, that's great. And she loves it, you guys. She gets really up for it. Because sometimes I know it. And I'm like, let me show you. So anyway, shout out to Friend of the Pod, Bobby. We Love You or Mail Giggler. Maybe we do a hand in page try new things. And we cook with Bobby. And we like, because last time we tried to cook with Kim, your mom, she didn't let us

touch the food, which was so valid looking back. At one point I think she swatted us. At one point she was like, Hannah, can I talk to for a second? Don't fucking touch my boss. She was like, oh. She's like, no, this is a watching lesson, not a doing lesson. I have one more Lois quote and then I'll move on from my motherhood. Yeah.

I said, Lois, what's your first? favorite animal and she was like flamingos and I said why and she goes because they're girls of course I said oh of course I said what her boy is she was like tigers duh and I was like of course I'm like has there ever been a flamingo that's a boy and she was like no that would be stupid and I was like I love that I always forget about the flamingo the flamingo is so iconic also they have to eat shrimp to be more pink which the lore I'm obsessed you were like so It's like when your pee is orange, you're like, somebody went crazy last night. I would be a Nutella ice cream at this rate.

Like, I, that's where I'm at. Anyway, how are you? I was just going to say, like, I feel like I even seen you. No, we haven't podcasted in forever. No, like doing a 45-minute preamble with your friend is so necessary to, and then you can get into topic. You know? Can I talk about my marriage? The floor is yours.

So you guys know, Des and I travel a lot. We don't spend a lot of time together. It's really beautiful for our connection. And this summer, we've been together. And now there's, like, people staying at the house, so I can't just, like, go into another room when I feel like it.

There's people there. So we decide to go to bed. Just, like, I thought we were just getting in bed at, like, 9 p.m. on a Monday. What time are you getting in bed like in the average week? In the past, I would like, he would go to bed and I would stay like watching Drag Race until like 11 and then I hit to bed and then I'm like an hour or two. It takes me to go to bed. But lately in the summer, 9 p.m., I'm like, let's start the process.

I'm 8.30 and I'm like, let's fucking start. Let's get it going. Let's wrap this shit up. But this is the thing when he goes to bed. This man's going to bed. Yeah, that's, that's, well, why don't you tell the pod your freaky, freaky ways in the bedroom with your husband and the lack of television? So, I have a little TV in this bedroom. But turns out when you put on an intense documentary, it's actually really hard to go to sleep right after.

I'd love to take a poll of the listeners of how many of you. have TVs in your bedroom and how many of you don't because I came from a no TV in the bedroom household like did you have one when you were a kid no yes but it wasn't like connected yeah bitches and I couldn't figure it out like it only played VHS tape yeah Mary Kate and Ashley was on a fucking loop in there yeah but also you'd be up all night if you had capabilities like that well I didn't break the rules so like when my mom was like TV's off. I didn't think, like, oh, I should, like, turn it back on.

I, like, I literally accepted her at her word. I was like, okay. You're like, and it doesn't work now. I'm like, why would she steer me in the wrong direction? She's obsessed with me. So he's like, maybe don't watch another crazy documentary. I watch the Travis Barker documentary, which I'll get into. Heart was beating rapidly.

You're like, all right, babe, something light. This is Charles Manson, but it's kind of, it's extended family. Like if I want to go to sleep I need to watch the Great British Bake off Is that what's called? Yeah Anyway, it's like 9.05

Butter's on me He's, I don't know what's going on And I like turn and obviously like knock my phone off the bed And it hits the ground It makes like a huge loud sound And he's like, oh You woke me up And I'm like, it's 915

It's 915 It's 915 on the a fucking Saturday. I'm starting my day. Like I'm like beginning. I can't be in like, like at first I felt bad because I'm like he's asleep and I'm like it's the middle of the fucking day. I can't tiptoe around my bedroom because you fall asleep at 9.05 p.m.

Because you've been up to six. I'm not a prisoner in my own home. No, a literal prisoner. I haven't even brush my teeth yet. I'm like I have to get up and I have to get past butter and all the cords and like and I drop everything and then I'm going to trip on stuff. So I'm like a spy in my own bedroom at 9. 30 trying not and he also wakes up with a blink of an eye like movement wakes him up he's a light

sleeper yeah so that's something i'm dealing with because i don't want to like i respect him but also i can't live like this for like three hours before i go to sleep like i had to sneeze like are you i had to sneeze and i did the like you know when you hold it in and you're like no that's not good for you that's that causes like inner turmoil i always think i'm going to have a heart attack? No, once I almost shot myself because I held in the sneeze and I has to come out somewhere. And he's like sleeping so peacefully next to me. 9.45 p.m. I'm holding in sneezes in my own house. So like thinking of you having to be super, super quiet. Also, we talked about it. I walk like a like Frankenstein around the house.

Are you like watching TikTok on with no sound? Like are you at that level? Yeah. And then at one point he like wakes up. He was like, oh, two screens because like I'm watching TV and I'm on my phone. And I'm like, no. Two screen. Wait.

You want me just watch commercials? You want me just raw dog a commercial? Because I was watching tennis. Oh my God. But that's like, that's borderline jazz music in the background. Like, please. That's just like a softener. Please.

That's elevator music, babe. that's we're not watching the great debate up here like please like I used to do whatever I wanted at night I'm like this is me being good two screens that's me being good and one of them I don't even have volume loud and I feel like your algorithm knows when you're watching on silent because it starts giving you ones it's like a bunch of words and I'm like fuck you yeah it's like a paragraph like one day I thought my life was over but then I turned everything If you believe in yourself, that's when it gets dark late at night. No, I hate a motivational person. Oh, God.

And then you just, if God forbid I read one sentence, I'm like, oh, no, now I'm in the algorithm because I give it a chance. No, I can't do it. So I don't like to watch on silent. I like to like do the volume, just like a tinge because I'm like, I don't want it to fuck with my algorithm. Well, then I've also been still listening to this podcast that I can't finish because I keep falling asleep, but it's really good about the clip. the what's it called i've been listening to it for six months i honestly it sounded like you said the clit which is crazy to them be like i don't know what it is it's clay the bachelor about his like pregnancy oh yes yes yes and we met um we met yes the host stephanie i think she's amazing so i've

listening to that so then i'm like putting it by my ear also i have to navigate this is like real it's like real life baby reindeer right it's also like he a girl accused him of being pregnant they never even had sex and like she took them to go and then she has more guys she's done this too it's crazy but i can't just like move my head because butter's also like laying in a type of way i can't move because of butter i can't move because it does i'm trapped in my own i can't smile the silent burden on women is crazy no literally the work we do the mental load the mental they would never know they would never know it's so here's the thing though I dislike men, but you have to find one that they don't have the random traits that you absolutely

hate. And it could be like so small, but low key, they're kind of big. Like if I am sleeping in and I'm dating a man, not even sleeping in. If I'm sleeping and it's morning and the man has to get up early and go somewhere, I expect you to act as I do. Don't turn the lights on. Tip toe, shut the doors that you have to have lights on. If you're with someone that has no regard for like, oh, you have to go with their flow. No. Because I feel like that's like a bigger thing that's like a form of manipulation and control.

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There's a tiger behind one door. You must figure out the door. Where's the gun? The question is, how old is everyone there? Okay. We're all similar ages. Okay, undisclosed location. Similar ages.

How many women was it? Two women. Okay. Jeremy's six years old. So with eight years old. Do you remember those? How old is Sarah? If Jenny had two berries and Sam, I'm like,

Fuck you in your blueberry pie, bitch. You always chose C. You're just like at C. Okay. You're all like similar age. Let's say the girl had to go up to do something. Like she's doing something important. And now you're left alone with the three boys.

And everyone is done eating. What is she going? Okay. She's leaving the table for whatever reason. She had to do. Let's say she had kids and she had to go take care of the kids. Okay. So then it's you and these three boys.

Okay. Three men. Everyone's done eating. Do you get up and start taking their plates? Wow. No. I think the first plate I'm grabbing is mine, and I'm grabbing my girlfriend who just got up from the table. I'm getting hers.

And then you leave them to deal with it. And I would expect they all grabbed their own and something else on the table with the other hand. like a shared dish or something. Yes. Yes. Okay. So I did an experiment. Okay.

And I was like, what if I just fucked off? Yeah. What if you left? Oh, I've left. And I think I've left. I did my plates. I did my plates. But I was like, because my first initial instinct was, okay, let's take everyone's plates.

But you know, I'm fighting the patriarchy every day. And I said, what if? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. that's three grown capable men why am I also taking their plates and doing the dishes? Yeah. So some will call it lazy.

Some will call it flipping the gender roles and empowering women. And I got up, put my thing away, and then I think I left the room. And I said, let's see if three grown men could figure out. Also, there was food everywhere. Like, why am I the sole woman here responsible for putting away the food.

Obviously, if I was mature, I could have said, hey, can you guys help me? Put away the food. But I just wanted to see what happened. That's so Scorpio of you. You're like, I could say something, but why not set a trap? Like the amount of traps I've sat in my day

where I'm like, I could have just spoken my mind, but this is more fun. But I also have internalized misogyny that I even thought that I should be the one to do it. You almost feel like a sense of guilt that you're not doing it. That's what I feel sometimes. Yes, I felt guilty. And then I was like, do they think that I should do this right now?

I don't think they're thinking about it. I don't think it's even crossing their mind because so many things magically get done. I want to give men, like I love men, obviously. Like I'm attracted to them. I want to give them the benefit of the doubt. And sometimes I almost feel like I give them. them too much credit that they're like intentionally doing something i genuinely think there's a lot of situations where it's not even crossing their fucking mind because they've never had to deal with

it that's the privilege of it but then also we can't assume that they are not going to do it yeah just because they haven't done it and also this is about me by the story's about me i bought like a ton of food for everyone take out we're having so much fun my house too but like I'm kind of the host but then also that whatever and Jeannie had to go with the kids and there were three men and me and I was like I bought this I don't want to also have to like take all the food like this is too much labor for me yeah you're like I'm not catering and clean up crew I can't do it both do you think Bobby Fla is at home cooking and then cleaning no one expects Bobby Flee to then put his stuff away because you're like thank you Bobby thank you the chef um by the way why are all chef's men i'll get into it later so i just put my plate away and i was like let's see what they do and they figured it out on their own and it's crazy because i was going to do it like my dad is kim's biggest helper yeah like he is behind her and she's like vacuums in this room like i need plates over here like we sue chef honestly we work for her yep

We work for her. My nan and papa, before we're even done eating, my papa's doing the dishes. Yeah. That is a well-oiled machine. So it's also, I think, like, communicating. But I just feel like as a woman, it was, like, my duty to, like, clear the table. Well, I think part of, like, love. And correct me if I'm wrong.

I think part of love is, and it could be, like, with your mom, your dad, your brother, your significant other. Like if I see a task or something that I could do that would take any type of burden off this person I love, I'm doing it. Yes. I think once it became like a lot of people, I was like, this is too much for me. Yeah. So like if I've cooked an entire dinner, for people I love, I would expect them to feel the same way

I do about them and I would expect them to be like oh my god she probably was so stressed cooking all of this I'm going to help her clean well that's what I was going to say it's like why don't you show love to me yeah but you ordered in so and do you know how hard is to order things I had to consider everyone's allergy I actually really love doing a group order like I'm like guys are you like a pass the phone around put in what you want no no no let me cook babe let me cook I took a pen and pencil and I was like, drive around to the pro petition please. See, I don't want to do the group order. I know what everyone's going to like at all times. Are you sitting in real life out to dinner? Are you, waitress comes over and someone's like, do all the apps. Are you the person they're pointing

at to do all the apps? It depends who I'm with. Like, honestly, my brother is a foodie. And I also have that weird thing where like I trust my brother and I love him and I I eat everything so I'm like whatever my brother is like feeling freaky about go for it so when I'm with my brother I let him decide he lets me decide he's more chill with food he's like whatever you want so there's different there's different chemistries going on yeah yeah and then Indian food my mom knows she orders that like some people specialize oh you're oh you guys over in your family you're specializing in cuisine. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Not everyone is equal. Not everyone's equal in their knowledge of extensive cultures. Not everyone has a seat at this metaphorical table. Also,

you have to understand growing up in Parkesl, Brooklyn, at one years old, we were doing Japanese, Korean. Yeah. We were Mexican on the corner. We're doing Thai. Like, you're exposed to so much. Korean. I was like, where's the Bibinbop? And they're like, you're three years old. I'm like, okay. I actually feel like I remember the first day I had. fried rice. Like I had Chinese food. Did it change your life? No,

it changed my life. It was also a very intense bonding experience for my mom because my brother and my dad don't like Chinese takeout. Oh my God. So whenever they were gone, were you like, let's get fucking Chinese break out. And we would watch Gilmore Girls. So at the Chinese restaurant, Sejuan Delight, around the corner growing up, the waitress loved my brother so much, she would bring them back in the kitchen.

Okay. Dana was working for a such one delayed at four years old. And if I know Danny Burner, he was like, take them, bring out more food, have them. Danny was like, and make sure that the dumplings come out stuffed, okay? Whatever, put him to work. He's like, I don't care. Do more spare ribs? Oh, good times.

No, it's so funny. Honestly, it's funny because you and I are similar because we're very close to our moms. And I get a lot of DMs from girls. Like, I hope I'm this close to my. daughter or like oh i feel this way about my mom or like i miss my mom things like that and so like i'll think of like things from my childhood like yeah why am i so close to my mom compared to like other people like were there things that she did of course as a mother that like made us really close but also like i think i was just like so sick in the head like we would watch gilmore girls and like the dad

didn't live in the home they never saw the dad he was by all means a deadbeat dad but then when he came home everyone was like we love you daddy yeah like sometimes he was in the episodes but i would literally look at my mom and be like if you tried harder we could be gilmore girls like we don't like we don't need them wait do you know i never watched gilmore girls what never one time there was an era of my life where I guess I, like, missed a lot of TV. I think when I was in Florida. Hannah, you... I was at a tennis academy.

I was playing seven hours of tennis a day, 14 years old. Well, then you need to unwind with Laura Lai Gilmore. I mean, it is some of the best scripted TV. It's so good, Hannah. And you do the rewatch in the fall. It's very fall coded. Oh, wait, you're so right. You're going to watch this fall.

We should do... I feel like Book Club obviously is too difficult for a giggly squad, but at least do rewatches together. Okay, don't sign me up for your rewatch because I've watched it literally seven times. And we have a book club. We have an accessories club. We have a clothing club.

We have a newsletter. We have a lot. We are, if anything, we're getting into college. Okay, we are the president of a lot of shit. So. Do you know I've never seen the OC? What the fuck is going on with you today? Do you know I've never seen what's the,

what's the show? What's the shit? show with like lively i've never seen one tree hill gossip girl i've never seen gossip girl how did you assimilate in society i wasn't i was like playing tennis all day at a tennis academy where like we didn't have phones like unless have our phone like it was like a torture chamber no hannah this is like concerning you have to watch these things after practice and my dad was like we're watching the nix and i was like okay well this is a sports podcast this is a sports podcast this is podcast but we have to put gossip girl on lois will freak the fuck out she will like things will go over

her head she will love the glitz of she's already stressed about project runway she does not like some of the looks that came out last week she was like they had all day can you show lois lizzie mcguire today well we were watching toy story you know she loves bo peep she just waits for bo peep to come on because she's she's like she's the only one in a dress she's the only one that put herself together and looks fucking adorable. She's the only one that was like, we're filming a movie.

I watched Aladdin yesterday. Jasmine's so gorgeous. Lois loved it. But like, these Disney movies are fucking violent. Within the first minute, he like steals something and he's getting chased by guards

and they're like, let's slit his throat. I'm like, what the? Have they done a remake of Aladdin yet? They did. They did. But Robin Williams was in the first one and he was spectacular.

Disney loved taking great comics and making them like side animals or like weird things like any murphy um are you talking about the animated one he said yeah he's the genie he's spectacular in it oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah but can we do we just have to acknowledge hayden i'll cry no how crazy no it's so fucking sad especially because you guys no i just recently did a whole nashville rewatch oh really Right. Oh my God. I forgot. You did in Nashville rewatch. Because you know me. I never saw, remember the Titans. I never saw heroes. I never saw anything else she was in. I saw Nashville. The second she went on screen, you cannot keep your eyes off her.

And she's like a little genius. Like she was a little girl who was thrown into this. And I just ordered her book. Oh, you did? Which I think we all have to read. Sad, sad, sad. And I think, we can go into the week with empathy. I was watching one of her podcast she went on and she was just talking about like, I wish they taught you as a kid to be nice to yourself. Yeah. So I think we leave the pod with a mental health moment.

That's so nice. That when you're mean to yourself, it actually doesn't make you better. And once you learn that you can be nice to yourself, the world changes for you. and I think when Paige and I started to be nicer to ourselves things started to go better in our lives so we're I'm the fucking best

are you kidding you don't have and those voices that are being mean to you are not you yeah those are people from your past who are trying to take you down so don't let them win homework giggly homework everyone watched the Travis Barker documentary on Hulu it's good Courtney's in it There's a new, oh, then I'll watch.

There's a new period piece on Netflix that I'm about to start tonight. Oh, you're jacked up. I'm jacked. You're prepping all day for it. They rarely have a period piece that is in Bridgeton, which is the best period piece of all time. Sorry. You said a ghost from your past to come through. What's a weird pod today was?

Also, side note, the reason we're close to their moms is because we had past lives with them. So true. I've been with my mom in every life. Oh, yeah. Angel did say that to you. Wait, I'm serious. I need to make an appointment with Angel because like the fall is just like giving her vibe and I need her. Do we go to Boston? I don't know. I'm like, is it as effective over Zoom? I think there were some girls that were like I zoomed with her. I think it is, but also like the in person experience though. She's like, I mean,

we were in a witch's brew. Yeah. There was like statues around us. We're on the set of Pocus Pocus. It's getting chills up my spine the whole time. All right, I got to go. Okay, we got to go. We love you guys so much. Enjoy your week. And we'll talk to you soon. And I'll see you if you're out in Long Island at my cat cafe.

Look out for the link in my bio. Woo-hoo. Bye.