Giggly Squad - Giggling about sports, socializing, and saying sorry

Episode Date: January 23, 2026

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What's up, gigglers? Gary, fix the Wi-Fi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed. Got away from me? What's up, my grandma garden gigglers? Grandma garden? Guarding.

Guarding. Garding, grandma guarding. The gigglers rode. Nana called me. She was like, what did I do to deserve all this love? I keep getting messages. Oh, wait, what? Yeah, wait.

Where did they? What means of, what platform did they? It's on threads. Nana doesn't even know what a thread is. Mm. Besides what may be on her gorgeous sweater. Let me, let me just preface that I am doing something that's like so evil to do to my friend. And I made Hannah wake up at 7.30 in the morning because she's in L.A.

I have to catch a flight. And I was like, we have to record Giggly Squad. And this was the only time that worked for us. So Hannah's like, Hannah's still fully sleeping. So whatever she says in this next 45 minutes, she's not liable for. It's not her. Her hair looks, if you're listening, her hair looks stunning. I've never seen it so perfectly tousled because she went to bed, what, probably three, four hours ago.

It's still done. Who knew a curl could hold? You literally look like you could Irish dance at any minute. You have the perfect ringlet. Wait, at Athena, Alberta, she's incredible. She's incredible. If you question how a girl could hold, just watch this episode. No, I had my L.A. show last night.

And Paige was like, hey, I got to, like, do like a 7.45 recording the next morning. I was like, sure. I was like we could do it later at night and it could just come out a little bit later in the day. I was like, absolutely not. I can totally get up at 7.30. I can do it. And then I'm getting text at like 720. She's like, I mean, I'm ready when you are.

I'm like. No, it's honestly so mean of me because let me tell you, I had the slowest morning. I woke up. I took a shower. I had iced coffee from yesterday. Old ice coffee that I poured in here. And then I had a lactate creamer threw that in. Let's fucking go.

I'm not fucking around this pod. I'm awake now. I'm awake now. I mean, let's get into it. Okay, one thing I want to say that I've been thinking about all week. I mean, and all morning because you've just been waiting for me. No, literally. I'm just like, what am I going to talk about on the pod?

And I rarely do a mental health moment of the day or of the week because I'm like, push it down like the rest of us, okay? Cry to your mom in one Uber ride and then suck it the fuck up. I saw this TikTok the other day and it was like a funny TikTok and a girl was saying something about I didn't overreact. If anything like I underreacted. And you know when you're like in your mid 20s, maybe even early, late, whatever. And you do something and you're like, that was a crazy situation. And it sticks in your brain so much that you think about it years later before you're falling asleep at night.

Like you just lay in bed and you're like, remember when I? Absolutely. Can you not talk about the bed right now? Because, like, I'll fall asleep. I swear to God. If you bring up sleep or the bed, I will fall asleep right now. I'm fighting for my life. I was like, what kind of pillow were you sleeping on?

Tell it to be slowly. I'm also fully wearing my Daphne-Hannity pajamas right now. No, is it the best sleepier ever? I, like, I inadvertently made a pajama line for pregnant moms, and I didn't even mean to. I was going to say, you made a pajama line just. for me and pregnant moms. I am a pregnant mom.

I get so many pregnant moms being like, hey, this shirt that ties in the front is fucking phenomenal for breastfeeding. And I'm like, I didn't even mean to do that. Literally everything in your line works for pregnant moms. Like, are you trying to say something? Wait, sorry, I interrupted you. What were you going to say? So you know, when you're laying bed at night and you're like, oh my God, remember when I was

24 years old and I like freaked out in front of everyone and like how could I have done that? Oh, yeah. Recently, I've been like thinking about those moments. And I'm like, I wonder if I'm experiencing moments right now that in five years I'm going to be like, wow, I overreacted. And I was like, you know what? No. If anything, there are so many times where I have underreacted, but society has made me think like, don't be dramatic. Don't be crazy.

Like you're being a bitch. When in reality, I should have burnt your house down. Yeah. No, 100%. health moment for the week. Like, you're not overreacting. If anything, you could be underreacting and you'll think about it in five years. Literally, I had so many points I wanted to say and I forgot all of them because that was like

such an intense way to start the pod when you know I'm asleep. And you're like, let me just start about like judging our entire life and what I should have done. And I literally had good points to make. And like my brain was like, no. I'm actually so sorry for that. No. We actually, can I have a mental health moment? Sure.

Because. I shouldn't have watched Traders. It was, it triggered me. It did. The reality of it? Yeah, and I just have to say, I'll make this quick. Just like Ron Funch is as a fellow comedian. And I watched, there's a scene where like Derinda says something that's like,

not that bad and like kind of mentions his family. And he responds like, fuck you never talk about my family again. And I literally, what's the problem? I literally like was talking my friend and I was like, that was out of nowhere and that was insane and and then literally today on threads Ron Funches was like do you really think that's the only thing she said to me and that's how I reacted and I'm like you fuck Hannah fucking burner how dare you do that to someone else how dare you do that to someone else after what you went through so um just know that there's a lot more things that are said to

make people snap than what you see you want to know what you're kind of like a don't want people to get triggered by this you're kind of like an alcoholic where like you were like I've been sober for this certain amount of years you know what I actually could probably handle one cocktail at dinner and you're like you have the cocktail at dinner and you're like see I'm totally fine you're like you go back to dinner the next week and you're like maybe I could have two cocktails you have two cocktails and then you're like hold the fuck on I'm getting on the bar Yeah, now I've been arrested. I'm on TMZ with my shirt off and I'm snorting lines of cocaine.

We now find you in L.A. waking up at 7.30 a.m. being like, you know what? I'm miscalculated. I go, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I've lost my family and my friends. Hannah is no longer our traitor's correspondent. We hate to see her go, but we respect her at this time. I mean, the fact that I felt a negative feeling towards the adorable Ron Frunches when clearly more stuff was said to make him snap.

And I just want to apologize to the community. No. I had so many people in my DMs being like, loved your rant about Colton, loved it even more knowing you haven't seen a single second of this season. I'm like, and that's what I'm here to do. I'm here to have opinions on things I don't know about or care about. People were like, Hannah, like, how can you do two episodes? And I'm like, it's just about having really hard takes about things you don't know that much about. And you just have to fucking commit.

Pick a side and go. And Paige and I tend to pick separate sides. And that's 30 minutes. That's 30 minutes right there. Because, okay, if you get on the phone with your friend at like a random time during the day, it's literally just you two back and forth. Yeah, you don't call with an outline. No.

And next thing you know, you're two hours in. and multiple people's names have been dragged through the mud. Literally, one of my girlfriends called me, like, last week, and I go, I was like, hey, I'm really tired. I actually, like, can't get on the phone. Let's, like, voice note this. And she goes, totally respect your privacy. I just have to say one thing on the phone. It's going to be two minutes.

Four hours later, I was, like, I was early for something. I've now missed it. Like, you've ruined my day. Let me say something about socializing is two people who have social anxiety. And we're both so respectful of each other's social anxiety. Like I'm literally like, call me when you feel like it. I'm here. I'm waiting by the phone.

But like, I'm literally like that. I'm like, I won't call you out of nowhere. Because if I do, I know you get startled. You do always tell me your location. You're like, hey, I'm sitting at this hotel. I'm in my room. I'm in a peaceful place. There will be no sudden movements.

But I do have to say Now you know what I'm doing Every time we're like hey I'm in the Uber I'm on my way to the hotel Give me a call if you want If you need me If you feel safe If you feel secure

If you've done your deep breathing I'm available for about 15 minutes tops And then I will have to go And continue my day Meanwhile me calling my mom Blowing up her phone My mom needs to have a restraining order on me Mm-hmm

Mm-hmm My mom might go no contact with me for what I've put her through the past two weeks because I've called her so many times and like, and another thing back to the morning conversation. My life has one long phone call with my mom with breaks in between. That's what our life is. No, it really is. It's a stream of consciousness.

Speaking of mother-daughter duos. Yes. We didn't, this is the first time we get to talk about that we're interviewing Kate Hudson, Brenda Brenda Song, and Mindy Kaling for Netflix. the Kate Hudson Goldie Hawn relationship, mother-daughter relationship is one of the best things in my life personally. Kate Hudson just got nominated for an Oscar and Goldie Hawn's... And she sings in it. She's amazing.

Goldie Hawn's caption of like congratulating her daughter was as if she had just graduated the sixth grade and like is going into junior high. Like it felt like she just had Kate. Like it was like my baby. Like years ago I had this baby girl Kate and like now look. It was just so sweet and wholesome. Also she is an example of a nepo baby that we're like, thank God. Thank God she got into acting.

Thank God. Thank God she gave us how to lose a guy in 10 days. Still one of the greatest rom-coms that ever did ever did it. That ever did live. Another thing that's been on my timeline. And like, oh, you came. You were like, Hannah's unprepared. I came prepared.

Hannah's fully asleep and I have things to say. Another thing that's on my timeline that I like literally didn't ask for. But since this is a sports podcast, the Miami football game, why I'm getting fed this. So I see like one TikTok of like some speech and I'm like, that was like so sweet. That's like the sweetest speech I've ever seen. Then I see another TikTok and it's like. You stay too long on the speech. I stay too long on.

the speech. Yep. And then I got the entire lore of the guy on Indiana, Fernando Mendoza, who is now my personal Wait, this is not to brag, but like, Mama's been on the road and I haven't been able to consume Miami niche sports content. Can you tell? I don't want to consume Miami niche sports either. Can you tell the group what's going on?

In layman's terms, basically there was like a big. football game. Everyone was freaking out about it. And it was Miami, Indiana. Great. Apparently, Indiana is horrible. This is the first time in a billion years they've ever been good. Their quarterback is this kid named Fernando Mendoza. Now, unbeknownst to me, he's from Miami. His parents are Cuban. He's from Miami. He grew up his whole life wanting to go to Miami. I later find out that the coach of Miami also went to high school with this guy's dad. So you think he's going to go to Miami. He's going to be put on the team.

He goes, I'll walk on. Miami's like, get out of here. We don't want you. See, that's fucking crazy because what you guys don't know, walk on is literally saying, can I play for free? I don't need a, like, a scholarship. Just let me. It's basically like, can I, can me let me sit on the bench?

So they basically said no to letting him sit on the bench. He goes to Indiana. He becomes the quarter. He wins the Heisman trophy this year. They go undefeated. Which is insane because Indiana never has come close. He goes down to Miami for the last big, whatever championship it is. Not only does he make the game winning touchdown.

His parents are in the audience. His mom has MS. So she cannot stand to cheer for him. So the dad doesn't stand either. He sits next to her. It's fucking 6 a.m. I can't do it. I'm literally on my phone.

It's 2 a.m. And I'm crying over Fernando Mentos. I'm like, and now I need more. You know, sports is the only thing that makes me cry. Like, I won't create about anything except sports. I'm, so it was the sweetest story. And in a world's fill of male loneliness epidemic bullshit, here comes a guy, whatever generation that even is.

I mean, senior in college, I have no idea. Is that still Gen Z? Yeah, I would assume. Um, he just seems so pure. Like he's so just like a nice guy. Like it's just honestly, all the men should be taking rather than like watching red pill TikToks of guys looks maxing. They should be like looking up to this kid.

And it was and then there was a shot of him like at 11, the strip club in Miami. And I was like, have a great time. Yeah, that's where we went on my bad shot. That's where Paige got me a table. And that's where John Rule came out. Make sure you listen to that episode. Anyway, I hope to never be back on college football TikTok because that was... The truth is is sports is men's reality TV.

So it does kind of track that like if you would consume male content, it would be the most dramatic, like, game. Yes, give me a story, honey. Give me side characters. Give me lore from high school. No, literally, it's like a reunion that you were watching was the bowl championship. Also, the fact that you said layman's terms, that's so funny to me because I'm like, first of all, who's a layman? And do you think layman is like, can some people stop using my terms?

Yeah, I always like to think about it. Like, in my head, I picture someone laying down. Like, you can listen to this information while you're fast asleep. But layman's like, maybe let's not plagiarize and let's come up with their own things and stop using my shit. In terms of socializing, I just remembered one of the things I was going to say, the rest is dead. It'll never come back to me. So as someone who's nervous about socializing, I might say this before, but I feel like for mental health, it's good for you to be around people to see yourself through their eyes.

Because you know how you're like constantly like in your own head, making up your own stories about like who you are and like what you do and like who what's your story today of how people view you? And then you like hang out with one friend and they say one thing and you're like, oh, okay. Like I made a real complicated situation. ever described yourself to someone and then you sat back and been like, I'm nothing like that. I don't know why I said that. Like sometimes I'll hear myself and I'll be like, yeah, I'm like, I love going and doing that. And I'll be like, no, I don't.

I literally hate going there and doing that. Now when I go into that perspective, it makes me see some positivity because sometimes I'm like, this is just me like forcing myself to like extend energy when I don't need to. also I do want to expose the name of someone I told a story about on my pod because I'm very protective of people and I will not tell people's names but I ran into them yesterday and I was like do you know I told a story about you on the pod and she was dying laughing and she's like you should have said my name you should have said my name can you tell them it was me because that's hilarious so the girl who was trying to like party with me who was traumatized to find out not only were you in your 30s but you were also betrothed. I forgot about that part. I thought I was 27, which obsessed with her, obsessed with her. It was Tara Yummy, who I did not know who she was. I just like, she started messaging me.

And then Grace, my Gen Z icon was like, that's Mrs. Tara Yami that you're talking to. And I was like, oh, my God. And Tara came to my show last night. It was so much fun. She's on, like, YouTube. Like, she's like a streamer. And she's just like that girl.

She's just so fun and really friendly. I feel like I've used, like, her sounds before. And she has amazing taste in comedy, clearly. But she's so cute. She comes to the show. She stays afterwards. We're talking. And she looks at me and she goes, I was going to ask you to come out with us.

But I know you don't do that. And I said, and now we're going to be close, babe. Now you get me. Hey, Nana. When's your ambient start? When do you have to take that? She's like, do you need a hot tea? It's past 8 p.m.

Peppermint? I know you like peppermint. Can you put my pill in the jello, please? You know, I'm like, Tara, do you work? The clock strikes 10, and you're like, Tara. Honey, get my, get my socks. My knee. Get my socks.

Tuck me in. But no, I had the show in L.A. and actually, wait, we're going to be great grandmas. Like, can we skip to that? Fuck all that, like, kid shit. and being a mom and all that, like, like, pain staking and just decision-making. I feel like the only difference between grandma and aunt is, like, well, there's lots of difference, but you both can, like, leave when you want.

But also, grandma, like, you're the matriarch. Like, I was talking to Nana, yeah, she called me. And she was like, she was like, why am I getting all this love? Like, you love me so much. I'm like Nana, you made everyone. Like, it's because you and Papa met out of church when you were 18. I started this family and none of you would be anything without me. Literally.

I'm not to bring this up because I know your grandma has since passed with my grandpa and they're hanging out right now, giggling. I have zero grandparents. You talk about your grandparents every single pod. You literally sound like Des when I complain about, I complain about my grandpa. And he's like, you have two grandparents and two parents left. I have nothing. You know it actually is so, like, it's so nice you being 34 and you still have a full set of grandparents.

That's like unheard of, I feel like. And see, that's perspective. Instead of me crying every night over my grandpa, I should have the gigglers fight for Nana's rights. I mean, your grandma got to see you get married. That, I feel like that rarely happens. My grandma performed at Carnegie Hall. My grandma's lived to be, she's famous. But one thing about, I have to say about my Nana, she does not stop talking about

death. She literally just gets on the phone and she's like, okay. Now, I live such a good life. I've lived such a good life and I love you. And I hope I make it to the next time I see you. And I'm like, why? I'm always hoping to make it to the next day. It's so morbid. What are you in Paige doing? Because I need something to look forward to. No. And I'm like, Nana, you're going to make me cry. It's literally. literally 11 a.m. on a Tuesday and she's like, oh, I've had so many good life experiences. What did I do to deserve this beautiful life that's going to end any day now? She's like, okay, I hope I talk to you again and this isn't the last time. Bye.

I'm like, Nana, why? I'm crying in an Uber right now. Like, why do you do it? I'm having a great day that's going to end any second. Oh, and then my Papa apparently got this like test and the guy was like, he's perfect. He's going to live till he's 100. She goes, I'm going to die before Papa. Take care of him.

No, Nana and Papa are going to literally go on the same day. There's no way they're living a second without each other. Yeah, no, I know. And that's the ultimate romantic thing. Like, murder, suicide. That's what you have to do. I was just going to say, that's the ultimate romantic comedy. I have been watching, like, all of the major movies that, well, I have, like, a list that have been,

nominated you're basically in the academy i'm in the academy you are the academy i'm sag i'm voting i'm i'm i'm in there so i watched begonia over the weekend and last weekend and i watched sinners what are your thoughts emily stone former emma stone is such a good actress and she's so good at like begonia was one of like the weirdest creepiest very original like storytelling and she's so good at in her movies being relatable but also being the actress that you need in that movie like the character in that movie i don't know how she does it you know how we talk about like oh if you're going to see like a ryan reynolds movie you're going to see ryan reynolds pretend to be something but you're watching

Ryan Reynolds. Emily Stone is so good at being her. No, I love it. That's like my new thing. I'm like, don't call her the wrong name. She's requested Emily. She's so good at like you knowing it's her, but also fully believing in her character. You're so right.

And I thought I was going to hate that movie. See, I love weird ass movies like that. But it's funny because Emily Stone is in it. You know she's going to take care of you. You're like, I know that she's going to make sure that. This is going to be good for us. I love her friendship with Jennifer Lawrence because whenever I'm going to watch a Jennifer Lawrence movie, I'm like, even if the movie is shit, I don't care because I want to watch

Jennifer Lawrence do whatever she's doing. I want to hang out with her for the next hour and a half. So I don't care what the other characters are doing. I'm going to watch her. You know what people don't talk about enough. Easy A and Crazy Stupid Love were such fucking good movies that do not get recognized enough in the cultural zeitgeist. one time I dated a guy and

it's horrible okay it's literally 7 a.m. Why would you say that? Crazy stupid love I went through a phase where like that was the movie I would just like turn on at night to be like we'll fall asleep to this and he was like I think that movie is the worst

I think it's so stupid it makes me feel like uncomfortable and weird and like don't put it on. Let's unpack that sir. Let's unpack that. In layman's terms Let's unpack that. And I was like, that's such a random movie to absolutely be triggered by. Like, it's a romantic comedy.

What's his name is in it? Like, how do you hate anything? Steve Corel is in it. And what's the hot guy? Ryan Gosling. Yeah. I'm like, how do you hate anything with Ryan Gosling? That's so weird.

You probably wanted to sleep with Ryan Gosling, you know? And that's a cross. That's like not mine to bear for a minute. Yeah. Wait, can I give a Beckham update? yes because i actually talked to dez which we don't talk enough about does is a scorpio just like page and he's a psychic even though he doesn't believe in psychics but and i said that's what is going on with the situation and he's like i don't know what you're

talking about tell me what happened and i'm like okay well page's like psychic take is that the girl wrote it and he goes what did she say and i gave him the tea of it and he goes this is what gives it away no guy would care that much about their wedding. He goes, no guy would write about their wedding that much. And I was like, so you didn't like getting married to me. And he's like, this isn't about us. Well, I also think, oh, my God.

Look, Victoria Beck. I'm like Team Victoria on this. David Beckham came out and he was on some, like, he was like corresponding some type of show in the UK, some like match or something. And he inadvertently said, like, kids have to make mistakes. and you kind of let your kids make mistakes on their own, and especially with social media. And then one of her, like, stylists came out and said that she was like,

look, people can come out with different stories and be like, Victoria's awful. No, Nicole is awful. Which is like not good for girlhood, but continue. Yeah. Again, we're getting distracted. There's more important things happening in the world, but then these two hot girls fighting.

But anyway, I continue. Kind of like the same thing with like Prince Harry. Even though the situations are so, I don't think they're that similar. It's just like that they're British. Yeah. If a guy wants to leave his family, like he's doing it. Like I don't know.

Like that is like a thing within him. Like you can't tell him anything. Wait, that's so funny because daughters don't do that. Yeah, I feel like daughters. If the roles were reversed, I really think people would be like, hey is he controlling you like no one's really diving into that i don't know it's a sad situation also i do have to say nicola does follow me on tic-tac which means she has like incredible taste like high-brow taste in so i have to factor that in um but then also i'm victoria beckham

is my everything if i'm at my wedding and posh spice wants to dance i'm gonna let her freaking dams. She could beat me over the head. With the cutlery at the wedding. And I'd be like, thanks. People were tagging me and, um, our, fallon of me doing the worm going Victoria Beckham at Nicole's wedding. But the truth is, this is like family shit.

And I, I, it feels like dirty. And, but also, let's remember British press is really intense. Is insane. Like next level. And I know this as a. tennis watcher that in all the grand slams wimbledon is the one where like there's always chaos because the press like goes insane with the players and it's like unacceptable wait yeah speaking of tennis is there something going on with two of the tennis yeah what's going on with the two if you guys

want to know okay okay Naomi Osaka yeah and serana christia now christia has been in the game For a long time, she's 35. This is her last year of playing. This is her last Australian Open. She's playing Naomi Osaka, who is going to go down as one of the greatest of all times, had a baby and is now, like, coming back, hasn't fully... Oh, I didn't know she had a baby. Yeah, she was basically at the top of her game.

Like, everyone's like, she's the next arena, had a baby, and now she's, like, coming back. She's seated now. She's doing great. I feel like a fully SPN sports broadcaster right now. This is the thing about women's tennis. It's brutal. Like, it's one on one. one for like three hours you're basically fighting a girl you'd love it and you're like tell me more what are

the strategies so so in tennis there's all these like little things that make things like rude or not rude like for example the last one with taylor townsend and someone else um asopenko got mad because she won a point when the ball hit the top of the net and came over which is like lucky and if you win a point, even if it's not the reason you won the point, but it happened during the point, you should put your hand up to just acknowledge, like, I'm sorry. Mm-hmm. Which is funny because baseball. Wait, I love that in women's tennis, it's like, and also be courteous.

You also have to win, but you also have to say sorry for winning. Oh, my God. You have to apologize. But meanwhile, baseball, the guy will take a hard baseball rock, hit a guy square in the back, square in the back. It's great in the back. And he won't say sorry. He'll be like, what's up? I'm watching what does.

I'm like, he didn't put his hand up and he's like, they just don't do that. And I'm like, you, that was by accident. You can say sorry. He didn't purposely hit the guy. Not to bring the heated rivalry into it all. You have to. We all do. All I see are like hockey clips and them fighting.

And then I saw a hockey clip and it was like kids hockey. Like maybe the kids were like 11, 12 years old. And they were letting them truly beat the shit out of each other on the ice. and I'm like, hey, this is so fucking crazy that this is even an allowed thing in the sport. Like, I don't understand that. I don't think girls hockey, like, do that. I don't think. No, because they're normal.

We kill each other with words. I think because I, like, was so passionate about traitors that I kept getting TikToks of, like, professional athletes that have done some of the most horrible things to women and their girlfriend's wives and it's like and then they got a $50 million deal to play for the next five years and it was like they got they strangled their girlfriend they had to sit out two games they got caught smoking weed had to sit out four and so it's like there's all these little things in these like super male dominated arenas that like I feel like we don't even notice because we're like we're not even in there yeah that subconsciously teach them like no you can do that like

just as long as you're good at a sport, we don't give a fuck. Now, for women's tennis, I do have to say, like, this shit is happening all the time. Like, this isn't, like, a crazy drama. Like, there's other matches where there was drama. And, like, it's just Naomi's such a star. Yeah. When you win a point, you're allowed to be like, come on. But when you say, come on, there's also rules.

You can't do it. Now they, you have to curtail your... You have to curtail. You're not allowed to say, come on, like, at the girl. You have to, like, say it in the general vicinity. So if I hit a winner and I look at you and I go, come on right at you, that's considered bad Worsmanship. But if I turn to my team or I just say, come on in the air, it's okay.

So in hockey, I can pull my helmet off. Beat the fuck out of you with. Well, look, tennis is a gentleman sport, as they say. But it's funny. I've never said it out loud. And me saying out loud, the nuances sound fucking insane. No, that sounds insane. You're just like, yeah, these are like the rules.

Also, in junior tennis, you call your own lines. So that means like you're basically your own umpire. Do you know how much cheating was happening? Everyone's parents are about to beat the shit of them out if they lose. You're like out. And they're like, it's just anyway. Anyway, I have mental illness. So what happened is Naomi's pumped up.

It's a third set. And Serana Christa, she misses her first serve. And she's about his second serve. Also, if someone misses, it's considered, like not great sportsmanship to say come on because it's like they made a mistake you didn't do anything it's one thing if it's a force error which means i hit a really good shot which made you make a mistake that's okay but if someone just like double faults you don't say like come on so serana missed her first serve and you have to have cotillion while you're also trying to play a goddamn sport

yeah you're literally competing and also having to like be so prettyish you have to be so pretty You have to be British. So after the first serve, Naomi is like pumping herself up. She's like, come on, let's go. But I could see how Serana would be like, are you cheering for my like first serve miss? But look, it's like, it's one of those things where it's like it's third set. It's war. You're in a war.

She then decides to kind of care in it and go to the umpire and be like, is she allowed to fucking do that? And the umpire is like, you mean like between serves? And she's like, is she allowed to? And the umpire's like, yeah, she's allowed to because it wasn't a hindrance because you weren't serving. She's allowed to speak between serves. But then it's like, but in theory, it's I guess consider kind of bad sportsmanship to say, come on after someone misses a serve. However, Naomi also was like pumping herself up. Though it's very nuanced.

This is really funny for me specifically because we have an inside joke in my family that like the only phrase my dad says is, come on. Wait, he loves that. That's his vocal stem. Come on. Come on. Anytime something happens, like in our family, if you get a text that says, Paige, come on with a bunch of ends, we know in dad's voice, you're pissed off. But also, you don't really care.

It's just a small aggravation. Wait, small side note. Just to explain my dad in a goddamn nutshell, I had to shoot something over like the past three days. And so I like had my parents come to New York. I was like, why don't you come and like come to set with me? Like it's going to be fun. Whatever. My dad is like standing in front of me at my apartment and he's like, you know, Paige,

I just want to say something about the past couple of days. Now I think he's going to say so proud of you. So cool to witness what you've done. This is magical. This was so like I just, I love you so much. The woman you've become. He goes, now the Uber to the place and back home. I didn't like that guy.

But the second day, that guy knew what he was doing. Why didn't you get his card? He could have driven you around. I'm obsessed with him. And I'm like, so in the past three days, the only things you've wanted to speak your mind about is the transportation. I'm obsessed with him.

That reminds me of my first show at the Palladium in New York City that I sold out and everyone's freaking out. And my opener, Tracy Carnaso, she drove in from Queens. She gets in and my dad walks in and he says hi to Tracy. And he goes, how did you get here? And she goes, oh, I parked. And he goes, you found a parking spot in Times Square? And she's like, yeah, I got, I fucking, there's this place around the corner.

I fucking, he goes, you found a, Hannah. She found a parking spot in Times Square. Literally, I do the whole show, like, best night in my life, get off. We're in the car. My dad goes, Tracy Carnazzo, that girl. She found a fucking parking spot in time. He talked about this for two weeks. He sees her now.

He goes, remember when you found that parking spot in Times Square? That is so, like literally walked off the stage and he goes, Tracy's awesome. Tracy's awesome. And also, you know I couldn't drive at that point. So it was very triggering for me. I was like, I feel like this is coming towards me. So anyway, Naomi. Serrana, you can go to the umpire and be like, is that girl in trouble?

Like, what's going on? Like, it's like going to, you're like, mom, mom. Yeah, like you can tattel. Okay. Yeah, like you tattel. And then the person was like, this isn't, this is one of these rules that's like that's between you two. Like that's a, right.

It's not like a formal. It's a nuance. So clearly, and Naomi is clearly like, this girl's mad at me. And it gets fucking heated. Hey, quick, before we start again, are you mad at me? It's like very obvious. So also what you love is like when you play, if I hit a ball and you call it out and I know you cheated me, I can't.

get you to change it, all I can do is be like, are you sure? So I basically come to the net and go, are you sure? Basically, like, are you going to do this? Because then I'm going to cheat you back later. So all girls... That's so fucking passive, aggressive. That's so British, I feel like. And then the girl responds and she'll be like, yeah.

And then you go, how far was it out? Because you know, she's cheating. So you go, how far was it? And then she'll make like a huge, like, two feet. And I'm like, okay, cool. This was my childhood. This is... Oh, my God, Hannah.

That feels very Southern, like, bless your heart where you're like, yes. Would you just say to me, bitch? Are you sure? It's basically me going, I don't believe you. Are you sure? And then you wait and you cheat them when it's the most important point of the set. But I digress. That's just, um, ooh, dark.

I was like seeing TikTok videos and I was just like, I can't fully understand what they're fighting about. People think Serana was mad that Naomi said, come on. It's, it's because it was in between her first. and second served, which is like kind of unheard of. But in the third set, things get heated. And like, I've done it. Yeah. You just get pumped up and you're just like talking.

Also, Naomi was talking to herself. That was also the nuance. Naomi was like, come on, like pump yourself up. And if I had a nickel. She wasn't like being like, yeah, you hit the serve wide. Yeah, come on. And also Naomi is known to actually have like really good sportsmanship and be really calm. Like very good etiquette on the court.

Yeah. She's always holds herself really like. Like not too many emotions. I feel like I've seen some of her speeches. Yeah, she's very, like, soft-spoken. She's not known for, like, yelling that much, which, like, a lot of girls love to yell in tennis. But at the end, Serrano loses, comes up to the net. And, like, an aggressive, the handshake is a whole thing.

Okay, I saw that. And then did Naomi say, what was that for? Yeah. So Naomi is, again, showing that, like, Naomi is innocent. Naomi, like, doesn't even know that she pissed her off and what she did. Okay, when you come to the net, if you don't like the girl, you do literally, like, a limp, barely touch. Okay. That's how you should, because you have to shake their hair after.

And if you like them, you give them a hug. And if it's just, like, a normal match, whatever, you just shake it. It's in the rulebook that you must shake hands after. You have to shake hands after, which, me saying this out loud, I've never thought of this before. But like it's like imagine after fighting with someone you have to shake their hand regardless of what happens And you could be like 13 years old I was crying the whole match and then I have to go shake their hand Oh I mean I guess it's like when like I mean but do they do this in professes it's like if you play chess No I was gonna say like after like baseball when they get in a line and they go down there like yeah they hit their hands

Do they do that in professional? Yeah they do they do so like it's basically like end a mad shake hand If you're really mad, you don't shake their hand. But Serana comes in and like does a whole like kind of pushes her thing. And Naomi's literally like, what happened? What are you talking about? I saw the video and she was like, what was that for? And I guess she kind of figures it out. But then Naomi, then a fucking interviewer comes up to you in that moment when you know you're fucking hot.

Like you just got assaulted. Like you just, you realize someone is basically saying, hates you. and she's processing it and Naomi it was like the first time she ever got like a little sassy and she was like I don't know if it was my last Australian open I'd be mad too and it was like she's basically saying like your career's done bitch sorry I got a text I was like that was the punchline I was like that was the whole story was for that moment

well share it with the class wait Naomi it was actually from someone at the bank it was like anytime I see the word fraud I'm like I'm like I know I literally I become British I don't know why oh it was a fraud alert okay I respect that that is crazy if it was my last Australian open I'd be mad too yeah basically being like this bitch is done like I'd be mad too if this is how you end like I'm sad for you and then yeah she said and then she ended it she's so Gen Z, she was like, bro. And she never says bro.

She was like, bro. She never says bro. Like, she was like so like, like, chill out. Talking to her friends. She was like, bro. Like, they're always like so robotic because they're just like all, they're all sponsored by like Rolex. Like tennis like you have to be like.

No, tennis is like so chic. Gentlemanly and chic. So anyway. But also like it was actually like a day in the life of a tennis player. Like this shit happens all the time. and people don't really know the nuances so everyone's like freaking out but um basically they all they got heated and that's what happened he did rivalry this was a legit sports podcast today no i know also some people will message me and be like hey can you discuss this sports stuff like

people are getting into it they really are oh because tennis has such like i just keep using this word but it really does have such nuances especially because i really feel like tennis is the only sport, even more so than golf, where like, people watch the women just as much, if not more than the men. Do you know what I mean? Like, and they're at the same. They're in the same places. They're at the same tournaments.

So it is very interesting. When I was little and I saw Serena Williams, I was like, that's what I want to do. Like, because that was a woman getting like as much or more respect than the men. And I was like, whole shit, I like that power. Ooh, I like that feeling. I hate to revert back to my reality TV roots, but all I can think of is like, they all must sleep with each other. And they all must like get into fights. And they, it must be so there must be such good gossip in there.

There's also a locker room. So like after they play, they have to go in the locker room together. Yeah, they're not just like walking home. Like they have to go to the locker room. There's a players lounge. There's a gym. Wait, why did I like? media why did i think it was like everyone has their own green room type situation because it's an

individual sport it's love island everyone's i mean wimbledon there's a wimbledon like it's a city where everyone just stays during the tournament but the funny thing is the girls like they don't they're not friends with each other really there is a podcast that i will recommend if you love tennis called the players box with my friend jessie peggula very cute name madame Madison Keys, Jennifer Brady, and Desiree Krosick. I think I pronounced her last name, right? But she's like incredible. They're all incredible.

Anyway, so watch that. Really, just like some positive news? Yeah. Fetty Wop is back. No, like, and he looks healthy, you know? Like. Wait, he does. He looks strong.

He was lifting. Not to talk about a man's body, but he looks good. Not to sexualize Fettywop. But I could not help but think, we're eating good in jail. Like, what were you eating? It's kind of like Chappelle, how we went from like so skinny to one day. I'm like, he could carry me.

He could pick me up. Like completely body, like, body shape changed. You want to know what was so wholesome about Fetty Wap? He, like, genuinely thought that we like forgot about him, you know? And it's like, no, no, we've just been holding out. I thought about him every day. I don't even know what he did. And I, to be honest, I don't.

care because he brought so much joy to my life i can separate the artist from the art i actually have no idea what he i think it was like it was like minor drug related if i had a knuckle you know like yeah no one was murdered well i'll look into it later um i put on trap queen yesterday before my show and i was like that was the most beautiful time and then this is what it's like to be married to me like does was like falling asleep last night like everything was peaceful and he just gets a text from me being like am i your trap queen and he's like what and i'm like am i your trap queen and he's like lose my number i can't deal with this right now i'm literally falling asleep and i'm like so you hate me okay so you don't even so if i'm not your trap cream what am i what am i to you are you are

like annoying you are how i feel when like someone gen z texts me the most insane text and they're being dead serious and all i want to text back is there's no way you're fucking serious right now texting me that i think that's a good way to end this week oh my god yes page needs to now that i'm awake so early i have to jump on a flight you have to go um i love you so i'm so excited to see you in person i know i miss you i miss you so much it's been forever and i need to hug i'm like a high for my coffee but i do have to let you know when i get down from the high i will be mad at you about this um i love you guys so much No, this was like a drunken episode.

Thank you for giggling. We'll talk to you later. Bye.