Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - 177. Drew Friedman

Episode Date: October 16, 2017

Gilbert and Frank welcome back one of their favorite guests, cartoonist and illustrator extraordinaire Drew Friedman, who discusses his newest book, "Drew Friedman's Chosen People," and joins the boys for a rollicking hour of rumors, innuendo, half-truths and outright lies. Also, Drew puts Groucho to bed, Frank meets a real, live Stooge, Fred McMurray inspires Captain Marvel and Sammy Petrillo takes credit for "The Munsters." PLUS: The Uncle Miltie puppet! The MAD genius of Don Martin! The return of Perfecto Telles! Jerry Lewis "kills" Peter Lorre! And Mr. Warmth plays Felix Ungar!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Get ready to go all out for less. Hi, this is Gilbert Gottfried, and this is Gilbert Gottfried's amazing, colossal podcast. This is Gilbert Gottfried's amazing, colossal podcast. I'm here with my co-host, Frank Santopadre, and we're once again recording at Nutmeg with our engineer, Frank Furtarosa. Our guest this week is an enormously talented and popular cartoonist and illustrator, and both a friend and a generous supporter of this very podcast, which shows how poor his judgment really is. You've seen his work in Heavy Metal, National Lampoon, Spy, The New York Observer, and many other publications that no longer exist, including the final edition of The Village Voice that featured his full-page portrait of me. portrait of me. You've also seen his illustrations in the New Yorker, Entertainment Weekly, Mad Time, The Wall Street People, published by Pantagraphics Books.

Very good. With a foreword by comedy writer Meryl Markle, features portraits of the greats and near greats. Among them, Muddy Walters. Muddy Walters? Muddy Walters? Muddy Walters! The Jewish guy. The Jewish blues guy. It was Barbara Walters' cousin.

Muddy Walters. Had no idea. She was the more famous of them, too. Shemp Howard. George Zuko. Sammy Pedrillo. Drew's wife, Kathy... Bittis.

Bitis. Bitis. And she's got the bitis touch, I've heard. Frank Santopadre. And two, count them, two portraits of me. A new documentary about his life and work is currently being filmed, and the director, Kevin Dougherty, will be joining us a little later to discuss. Please welcome the Vermeer of the Borscht Belt, Howard

Stern's favorite artist, and a man, Joe Franklin, once sued for $40 million, making his first appearance on the show. Oh, making his? I on the show. Oh, making his... I thought you looked familiar. Making his fourth... I'll say it's your seventh appearance on the show. Drew Dots.

Our pal, Drew Friedman Thank you Gilbert Could you read that again? There'll be corrections I couldn't read it the first time We'll issue corrections He didn't recognize me

because I have lots of liver spots now I've changed How is it we've never been sued for $40 million on this show? I know By the estate

of Cesar Romero I keep trying Joe sued me and then we became good friends 25 years later as you know I know. At least by the estate of Cesar Romero. I keep trying. Joe sued me, and then we became good friends 25 years later, as you know. I know. I know. Joe is gone now, so he's not going to be suing anybody anymore. And didn't he say that he was really close friends with your father? Yes.

He said, Drew, your dad has been on my show many times. I said, really? He's never been on your show. He got indignant about it. He said, yes, your dad has been on my show many times. I said, really? He's never been on your show. He got indignant about it. He said, yes, he has. It's like, who could argue? Who could fight with him? Joe also said he had Cary Grant on, Greta Garbo, John Lennon.

None of those people were on. My favorite, when we had him on, he was telling us about the time he had both James Deaton and Al Pacino on. We looked it up. Yeah, we worked it out, and Al Pacino would have had to have been five. I think

it was 11 when James Deaton died in 1955. He would have been 11. It's possible he was acting when he was 11, but unlikely that he would be on the Joe Franklin show. Unlikely. Bloody unlikely. There's no surviving footage of any of that. By the way, he doesn't do the Jew dots anymore.

I noticed that. In 30 years. It's only been 30. Gilbert has to eat. Gilbert is still doing monster jokes in his act. It takes a while. He's doing hells ofster jokes in his act, so it takes a while. He's doing Hell's a Poppin' jokes in his act. It's actually been 20, 25 years since I drew with the dots.

Because where we met was we were both contributors to National Lampoon. Right. And you used to draw your drawings and you'd shade them with like a million tiny dots. That's right. And so whenever you showed up at the offices and I'd see you, I'd start screaming, there he is, Jew Dots. You'd follow me around. Everybody clear the way for Jew Dots. Jew Dots.

Jew Dots. You would follow me around chanting it. Yeah, I follow you through all the offices. This is only my first appearance on the show, but we've talked about this in the past. Yes. I don't remember the other times. We may have. This was the National Lampoon, the unfunny years.

So in the 80s, when there was no longer, they made an editorial decision not to be funny anymore. I remember. They hired Gilbert and I and Frank to do work for them. Well, I was a freelancer, but yeah. When they were down on Spring Street? Yeah, they moved around a lot

because they couldn't pay their rent so they kept getting thrown out. And I think they had a different owner each week. Well, this is when the publisher hires his own children to run the magazine. These kind of things happen.

Although, you know, I liked his children. But that's where Gilbert and I met and then Gilbert would show up at my apartment, you know, unannounced to watch my VHS horror movies because he didn't have a VHS machine. Yeah, because I would visit my mother and she lived a block from your house. You were on 4th.

I was on 6th. Yeah. You were on Avenue A. I was on 1st Avenue. So I would stop over your house. We wouldn't even say hello to each other. No, we never even exchanged pleasantries. You just opened the door and he'd walk in and put on Bride of the Monster.

It was kind of like Kramer. You know Kramer before his time. But then Kathy would get home from work and she'd say, what's he doing here? I said, I don't know. We're watching Bride of the Monster. What can I tell you? So I'd put his coat back on him and send him back home. What's he doing here?

She said, well, you know, we have to have dinner. But we did that many, many times. I wrote about that in The Voice. Those happy times when we would sit around in silence and watch The Manster. Or Bride of the Monster. Or The Haunted Strangler. Or The Indestructible Man. That was a favorite, of course.

Which I think you're going to be talking about a little later. And we watched The Owlet's Wing and Lizard's Tail episode. Route 66, yeah. Yeah. With Lon Chaney, Peter Lorre, and Boris Carl. Which according to a previous episode.

And George Maharis. George Maharis. Let's start. Let's start. Okay. Where are we going with this? Well, George Maharis, in case none of you have ever listened to the show, was caught in a men's room. It's like greatest hits.

Many years ago. He was a handsome actor, very successful on TV. And he was caught in a men's room with, would you like to say the name, Drew? Well, let me just digress for one second. When I was on the show the first time, you asked me, Drew, who was George Maharis caught in the men's room in Van Nuys or Rosita? I forget. It was one or the other. I didn't know.

I was stumped, and I'm still chagrined, embarrassed about that. Oh, that's- I didn't know it was Perfecto Tellez. That is inexcusable. I know. That was three years ago. Perfecto Tellez. I'll never excuse. I know. That was three years ago. Perfecto Tellez. I'll never forget.

We'll never forget now. Perfecto Tellez. If you're going to get caught in a men's room with anyone, you have someone named Perfecto Tellez. He was a hairdresser. Yes. Now, you guys know that Perfecto is still alive and a potential guest, right? Oh.

And George Maharis is alive. Perfecto? You could arrange a reunion. I don't know that Perfecto's still with us. Is he? I believe he is. Okay. Paul, you know what would be ideal?

George Maharis is. George Maharis, I know. Yeah, Paul, we'll find out. It would be ideal if we were talking to Perfecto Telles and Frank Sinatra showed up with George Maharis. That would be great. Or Frank Sinatra Jr. Yeah. One of the other.

Broker to reconciliation. Oh, I got it. That would be perfect. So you're working? Yeah, I'm a fucking guy up in the gas station in Atlanta. He turned into a punchline on that show Arrested Development. They named a character. Perfecto?

Perfecto Tellez. Yeah. Or Tellez. Well, the Veep is now referencing Danny Thomas in Glass Coffee. I know, I know. That's David Mandel. He's a good guy, and he knows his stuff. He knows his stuff.

Yeah, I've mentioned the Danny Thomas story a billion times, but now Franks gets upset. Oh, is that? Because there are some relatives of Danny Thomas. Well, you know, the last time I was on this show, I was on the show with Bill Persky. Yes. And Tom Leopold. Tom Leopold, Craig Bierko, and Paul Schaefer for the first anniversary. Right. So we brought up Danny Thomas and the glass coffee tables. We did.

And Bill almost made a beeline out of the room. Bill got a little upset, so I think you had to edit that out. So we're going to bring all that up again. Yeah. Tom actually was the first person to tell me about Perfecto Tellus. Really? So there you go. He knows his stuff.

He does. Well, when I first was emailing with Tom, we were talking, because I did a book cover for him, and I brought up Danny Thomas, and he paused and he said, look, there's no proof that he actually ate the shit. Which is true. There is no proof.

And one time I was talking to Sid Melton. Yeah. And I asked him, I said, now this story about Danny Thomas and he very sadly nodded his head yes. It's true.

While you were playing with his dog at the house by the airport. Well, that's true. He's a minglewood. Here's my concern that we'll go down so many rabbit holes

we'll never even get to the book. Yes, that could happen. So let's take care of that. Let's address that by getting to the book first. Thank you, Frank. So let's take care of that. Let's address that by getting to the book first. Thank you, Frank. Drew Friedman's chosen people. I think Paul is here with some tenor.

Perfecto. Breaking news. Perfecto Tellez. Perfecto update. Left us, sadly, in March 1980. Damn it. But here's one consoling factor. Before he died, he lived in Bent, New Mexico.

Bent. Nice. Excellent. Very good. Thank you for that. Excellent. See, if it's Bent. Nice. Excellent. Very good. Thank you for that. Excellent. See, if it's a question we don't ask him for. There was a play with Richard Gere called Bent.

Do you think that was based on? No connection. So, you know, he died in 1980. I guess I've never accepted it. Perfecto's death, you're in denial. I'm in denial about it, right? Yeah. But George Maharis is still around.

Just like they're are Holocaust deniers. I'm a perfecto teller. I'm a perfecto teller. You got to deny something. The death of perfecto tellers is something that the Jew media has been trying to put down our throats for too long. I swear to God, it's fake news. I'm not accepting it. Let's talk briefly about Drew's book,

since I fear that we'll never get back to it. Okay. Chosen People. You have a copy right there that he was kind enough to bring you. And it turns out, to my dismay, it's not only about Jews. No, they're not God's chosen people. They're my chosen people.

Muddy Walters on the cover. I'm sorry, Muddy Walters. Muddy Walters is on the cover. Muddy Walters. He's in Boss, too, so, you know, the blind can enjoy. But the funny thing about it is I would say 99% of them are Jews. And dead. Well, here, I'm looking at John Carradine and Johnny Cash, not a Jew in the bunch.

It's really a mix. It's not only just- Ted Healy, not a Jew. No. Al Hirschfeld, Jew. No. Alan Wolfe, not a Jew. Bobby Barber in the book, not a Jew.

Shimp, a Jew. Very Jewish. Lou Jacoby, a Jew. Or Buckley, not Jewish. Not Jewish. So it's a mix. It's my chosen people, people I chose to include in this book. And it's, you know, portraits created over the last five, six years.

And Frank is in the book. I'm thrilled. And there's two portraits of Gilbert in the book. Gilbert, you got your own, what do they call that? He has his own spread. He has a spread. And, of course, we have George Zucko in the book, John Carradine. Yes.

And the book opens with Forrest J. Ackerman. I'm especially happy to see. It's a mix. Ackerman to Zucco. Exactly. It's a mix and everything in between. Gilbert got a chubby when he showed George Zucco was in the book. And I got to read you what Drew wrote.

It's, you know, he lists all the people who were in the book and a short description. the book and a short description. Gilbert Gottfried, a hyper crazy, brilliant and fearless comedian who I've known for over 30 years, ever since encountering him at the mid 80s, not very funny version of the National Lampoon, which we were both creating work for. We hit it off because we both shared a passion for crappy old horror films starring Lon Chaney Jr. There we go. That's beautiful. Very affectionate.

I want to read something that Merrill wrote in the forward, the great Merrill Marko. This is the Jewish forward that we're talking about. I get it. I love this. Meryl Marko is Jewish, and I have something to say about her when you're done. I love this. To appreciate Drew Friedman is to appreciate Shemp, maybe even

a little too much. Well, Meryl was a huge Curly fan, passionate about it. She said she had a crush on Curly when she was a kid. She just thought he was so great, especially the spin when he'd spin around. So she's just like, Crowley purist. She won't go for Shemp.

I actually convinced her that, no, no, Shemp is worth paying attention to. And now she adores Shemp. And so does her boyfriend, Andy Preboy, adores Shemp. So, you know, I'm converting people little by little. Shemp gets looked upon as the George Lazenby. That's a good point.

I hear Kevin laughing out loud. Well, I would say that about Joe Dorito, perhaps. Is he the Pete Best? No, Joe Dorito would be the Peter Sellers of James Bond's, maybe. You know, the one

you always forget played Timothy Dalton. Okay. Well, he was okay. But Joe Dorito, you know, we're discussing him lately because we found photos of him and Randolph Scott. Now, Randolph Scott, for those out there who don't know, was either the boyfriend or girlfriend of Cary Grant. Right.

So he went from Cary to Curly Joe, which is a natural progression, you would think. Now, you have no proof of that, Gilbert. We have photos of them hugging, though. So, you know, make up your own mind. And I heard Cary Grant would lie under a glass of coffee. Oh, you! And Joe Dorito

would take his shit on him. I have a list of guys who would lie under glass coffee tables. You know, Otto Preminger was also into that. He was into that? Yes. Do tell. Yeah. You didn't know that one?inger was also into that. He was into that? Yes. Do tell. Yeah. You didn't know that one? I didn't.

Yeah. You know, between breaks during filming Skidoo. Where was something? You would unwind. Who else was into it? With Hooker shitting on top of him. Where would you come by information like that? You know, like people send me this stuff.

Usually I could like, you know, I could sense if it's real or not. Sometimes you'll tell me these stories. I mean, I'll tell stories on the show that are disturbing. Well, I just learned something yesterday. It's never too late. Did you know whose nickname was Princess Tiny Meat? No. In Hollywood? Frank, do you know? Princess Tiny Meat? Princess Tiny Meat was his nickname. Think about it. Walter Slazak? No, you're close though.

It's just a wild guess. Montgomery Clift. Wow. Marlon Brando coined that phrase. So he had a small dick? Supposedly, and that's one of the reasons he was, aside from having a lot of issues, he had a tiny penis. Yes. I didn't know

this until yesterday. No, I didn't either. I didn't know it until this minute. The't need but I didn't know it till the thing is everybody talks about the big cocks like Milton Berle and Hunts Hall and Eddie Fisher but the tiny ones had the tiny guy marks well guy marks had a huge one supposedly and William Defoe they say but the tiny ones that nobody talks about that so that's the first I learned about Montgomery Clift. William Defoe. William Defoe. I met recently and I didn't know this. I would have asked him. Did you sleep with him?

Ah ha! Well... If you're going to malign the guy, get his name right. No, that's an honor. What are you talking about? I thought he was in a small club. I thought that Milton Berle had the biggest schlong in all of Hollywood. A Jew of all people. What do you think of the story that Richard Kind told us,

that Forrest Tucker took it out and putted a golf ball? That's great. That's great. Yeah. Excellent. But, you know, Forrest Tucker, even though he worked with Larry Storch for all those years, he did belong to a restricted golf club.

A golf course. Did he? Yes. Well, they all did. All the non-Jews did. And I think Oliver Hardy. And Ward Bond, probably. Oh, forget Ward Bond.

And John Wayne. Yeah. I mean, there were some notorious Jew haters back then. And that's why they had to create their own club, like Groucho and George Jessel. Hillcrest, right? Right. Yes. That's right.

Yeah. Yeah. Although I met Anthony Quinn and he said he used to go to Hillcrest because he just loved sitting around with all of these old comedians that he grew up watching. It was one huge table of Cantor, Groucho. Can you imagine Groucho? Lou Holtz, Willie Howard. Yeah. Jack Benny.

I think David Steinberg used to hang out with those guys too. Yeah, well, he was under Groucho's wing in the late 60s and took the first stab at Minnie's Boys. But that must have been pretty – I don't know if they filmed any of that. I doubt they did. Who was under Groucho's wing? David Steinberg. Oh, wow.

Groucho loved him and hired him to write the first version of Minnie's Boys, which he didn't like. Yeah. What happened. Or it didn't work out. He told us that when he was on the show, Gil. You wouldn't remember that. I know. Pay attention.

You might have been napping. Groucho wanted Shelly Winters to play his mom because she had big tits, basically, is what it came down to. I never saw Minnie's Boys. Was it supposed to be terrible? I saw it. I saw it. I was 11. I loved it.

You did. What did I know? I was 11. But I loved it because it was like seeing the Marx Brothers on stage. Right. You know, like they did a lot of the shtick. But the thing is, Shelley Winters was so bad and she couldn't sing, so she would get on stage and basically gummo up the works.

Nice. That was actually a quote from the New York Times review. Nice. And that's why the show was a flop. But I loved it. Did you see it? And also- No, I never saw it.

The thing is, Groucho was a consultant on the show, so he, but I loved it. Did you see it? And also, no, I never saw it. The thing is, Groucho was a consultant on the show, so he was always in the audience. So I went up to him during intermission and got his autograph when I was 11.

I went under people's legs practically because everybody was crowded around him, but I was just a kid. So I still have his autograph on my playbill. That's the first

of three times I met him. Right, you went to the house with Dad. And yeah, as a kid, you were at Groucho's house. That was, my third encounter with him was casually Aaron Fleming, his girlfriend, who

used to, you know, like throw him around, throw him down the stairs and things like that. Yes. But we can forgive her. She like your pop? Yeah, I think she was, you know, she had a lot of friends out there, like young Hollywood type. So my dad was out there screenwriting and they became

friendly. So she invited, she said, Groucho loves kids. Could you bring your sons? So my two brothers and I were invited with my dad to Groucho's house. And we spent the entire day there. In fact, we put him to bed. He got in his pajamas. My dad gave him a copy of his current novel. Groucho took it to bed with him. But Groucho at 7.30 was watching You Bet Your Life, which just came back into syndication for half an hour. So Groucho excused himself to watch it, and then he went to bed. But we put him to bed in his pajamas.

Wow. I love that. We kissed him on the cheek. It was like an incredible memory. But stupidly, we got no photographs. But you don't think about that then. But then didn't he invite you yes yeah that's the story that one of my regrets probably my greatest regret is the day after aaron fleming called my dad and said um groucho had a great

time with you guys he'd like to invite you back next week because may west is coming over they haven't seen each other for 35 years since they worked together at paramount and so my dad said hey guys groucho's inviting us back do you want to go and my brothers and i looked at each other we had enough groucho so that kills me i still regret but you wouldn't have called him if he if you'd had his number in your wallet you didn't't call George Carlin? Yes. You didn't call Jonathan Winters? Jonathan Winters. Did you get to meet Larry Fine ever at that time? I know. Yeah.

Or Moe Howard? Any of those guys? No, none of the Stooges. I met Larry Fine when I was a kid. I told you that. Did you? At Dutch Wonderland in Pennsylvania. Wow, wow.

Was he sweet? Oh, that's right. He was making personal appearances in the wheelchair. I got to meet Emil Sitka, who was the Stooges. That counts? Yeah, I went to his house. He was great. I was going to illustrate his, that reminds me counts? Yeah, I went to his house. He was great. I was going to illustrate his – that reminds me.

We haven't talked about my book yet. Let's talk about the book again. And Emil Sitka was supposed to be – they were planning yet a newer version of the Stooges after Larry was way too sick to do it. And the third one was dead. Well, they got Curly Joe, Moe, but they were really, Moe was really old at that time. Yeah.

And then they took photos with Emil Sitka filling in for Larry, even though he was a foot taller than the other two guys. But then as like the day after they took those photos, Moe died, you know, and Emil told the story. It was very sad.

I got a call from Moe's daughter, come to the funeral, Emil. Moe was dead. And that was amel told the story is very sad i got a call from mo's daughter come to the funeral amel mo is dead and that was the end of the story did you hear bergeron's recordings oh yeah yeah with mo incredible it's pretty wild yeah incredible and larry yeah we're so nice to him on the phone going back getting back and he i remember what uh bergeron said was that when he was talking to Mo, Mo was really nice, and he said, so, you know, sounding exactly like Mo. Yeah. And he said, so, where'd you get my number from? And he goes, oh, I spoke to Larry.

He gave it to me. And there was a pause, and Mo goes, Larry. And there was a pause and Mo goes, Larry. Oh. I like Mo when you hear old recordings of Mo when he gets old. He kind of talks like you said, my brother Coily. You always call him Coily. Coily. Coily.

He was the baby. You see him in those Mike Douglas episodes. Coily. Yeah, with Ted Knight. Yeah. And I cringe because Mo is so old and fragile. His hair is white, but he combed it down in the Beatle haircut. But he's so fragile, it looks like he's about to keel over at any time.

And I think he died soon after. And now while Gilbert heads into the nutmeg kitchen to steal more Perrier, a word from our sponsor. Spring is here, and you can now get almost anything you need for your sunny days delivered with Uber Eats. What do we mean by almost? Well, you can't get a well-groomed lawn delivered, but you can get a chicken parmesan delivered. A cabana? That's a no.

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Podcast. Nothing more than podcast. All right, already, back to the show. I remember one time on the Mike Douglas show, I forget who the third one there was, but they enacted the Niagara Falls. Was it Soupy? I think it was Soupy. Oh, it could have been Soupy, yeah.

And they reacted to Niagara Falls thing. Yeah. this like kind of thing where after he goes crazy and gets back to normal, he kind of shakes around a little and looks dizzy. And each time he did that, you know, when he was young, that was probably funny, like he was getting back to normal. And but now you could see on both their faces, they were looking like, oh, is he going to die now? That's what I remember, yeah. Mike Douglas seemed very concerned. Remember that, Frank?

I do. Yeah, he looked really worried. Yeah, and I was worried too as a kid watching that. You can watch those on YouTube, and it's like he was shaky. Well, it's kind of like the later Three Stooges where they'd slap each other. That's right. Wait, you're slapping? These are 80-year-old men slapping each other.

Mo, where's Curly Joe? I want some pancakes. That's pretty good. You sound like Billy doing Larry. That's pretty good. Where is that? Where is that? What's his name?

That's pretty good. Listen, stop picking on him. It's just painful to watch as they got older and older. Well, we've talked about it. It's like watching the Marxists in Love Happy. You're watching a 72-year-old harpo limping across a roof. At least you're not watching... Even worse.

I know he wasn't 70. Yeah. He was almost... He was, I think... Probably in his 60s. No, he was in his 60s. You've seen those TV shows with the Marx brothers. He illustrated the box set.

Shout Factory came out with the box set of the Marx brothers on TV. And to me, it's painful because they call Chico Chico in the series they gave him in the 50s. Hello, Chico. It's like, you know, God, every time I yell, Kathy will tell you, I yelled at the TV, his name isn't Chico, it's Chico. And those, you know what was funny? I was watching, somebody sent me a tape of all of those, the TV shows of the Marx Brothers. And my son said, is this supposed to be funny? Oh, no. I to be funny? No.

I've heard that too. It's sad. I do have a question for Groucho, though. Groucho, why did you execute the Rosenbergs? Because Chico needed the money. Okay. I was just wondering. I have another question for Groucho.

Groucho, why did you bang Rosemary? Because Chico needed the money. Thank you. I have another question for Groucho. Groucho, why did you bang Rosemary? Because she called me Rosemary. Thank you. Is that a fact that he banged Rosemary? Who knows? You're taking liberties there. Who knows? You know, if Andy Devine banged Clark Gable, anything's possible.

Notice I don't question that he executed the Rosenbergs. Yes. You sent me that article. Yes. Basically never actually stating. Right. The original Brokeback Mountain. And the divine.

Fuck God. Clark Gable and the ass. But it went as far as you could go. Basically, yeah. There was no photos that existed. It's something I could draw. That's about all we're going to get out of it. Beyond that, there's not, you know.

Did you ever draw that picture? No, I haven't yet. You have to. Do you want to commission me? I won't charge you that much. That's a long wait. I'll charge you. How do you decide on some of these portraits for the book?

I mean, you have a lot of drawings. How did you win it down to this list? There's about 125 images in this new book, Chosen People. Half of them are maybe assignments, images I did for the cover of the New York Observer, the late New York Observer, published by Jared Kushner. Some work was created for the Village Voice, for the New Yorker, etc. But a lot of images were created for the for for the book specifically for specific um you know people i i've never i've never drawn before and i said i want to really draw these people finally so like george george zucco and john carradine and fanny bryce sarah silverman i hadn't drawn

before and other people i like jimmy kimmel is in the book but he did he wrote a forward for one of my earlier books so i did the drawing for that forward. So that's collected in the book. And some are friends, like Peter Kaplan and our old friend Jay Lynch. If they're friends, like when I was on the Marc Maron podcast a couple of years ago, as soon as I got home, I drew him. I was just like, you know, I really had a good time. I really liked him a lot. So I did a portrait of him, which he loved, and that's in the book, you know.

lot. So I did a portrait of him, which he loved, and that's in the book. So it helps if I feel passionate about people, either positively or negatively. And that's why Steve Bannon is in the book, because I saw that face and I said, I got to capture that. He's not so much a chosen person as he is just a chosen portrait. No, but it's just, exactly. So it's not only people I admire. There are some people in there I don't quite, I don't really admire. But I had to just, I had to get him out of my system. Kellyanne Conway, I feel the same way. I haven't drawn her yet. But look at that face. They're like, they're like created for me to draw.

I know they're. So how can I, you know, I can't escape it. And there's some, some are like a throwback to the Jewish comedian books too. Because there's Jackie Miles is in there and Guy Marks. Yeah, well. So you got some of those. Not only Jews. Guy Marks was Italian. Was he Italian, Guy Marks? Yeah, he, not only Jews. Guy Marks was Italian.

Was he Italian, Guy Marks? Yeah, he was Italian. He wasn't Jewish. I'll be damned. There are some non-Jew comedians in the book, but also I draw them as younger. Fanny Bryce only died when she was 59, so she never became an old Jewish comedian.

So I couldn't include her in my books, in my series. Same with Shemp. He died at 62, so that's too young. Well, how old do they have to be? Cross over to 65. That kind of qualifies them as old. You're not there yet. Because

when I saw my picture in your book, I was thinking, oh fuck, I hope this isn't an old Jewish comedian book. No, you're not there yet. Although, you know, my friend Bob Greenberg is begging me to include him in one of those books. I just look, you're not there yet. Although, you know, my friend Bob Greenberg is begging me to include him in one of those books. I just look, you're not old enough, Bob. I'm sorry. You're going to have to wait. Book number 12. Exactly. Speaking of that, you've talked about it before, but it's fun. Talk about some of the reactions that you got

from people like Jack Carter. Well, you know, when Jerry, you famous, you said loved it to death. And the first book came out, we talked about this, but when the first book came out, the publisher sent it to some of the comedians who were in the book. We got their addresses. So phone calls started coming in. I was laying in bed because I had sprained my back, like installing a toilet seat, which Jews should never do. They should hire people to do that and pay them as little money as possible. Yes.

We actually had an answering machine still back then. So phone calls started coming. And the first was from Freddie Roman, the dean of the Friars, who loved his portrait, who left me a message. I love it. I love it. But I have one question. Who is Larry Fine? He didn't know who Larry Fine was.

He didn't know who Larry Fine was. No, he didn't know who Larry Fine was. Oh, my God. So, you know, it's like it's a different world than Freddie's world, you know, which is from Kutcher's and the Concord and, you know, that world. So, you know, I explained it to him. Then Mickey Freeman called from the old Bill Coe show. Oh, yeah, Mickey Freeman. Fielding Zimmerman, the little blonde-haired guy, he called.

He loved it. Drew, I love the book. It's fantastic. That sounds just like Mickey. If you remember, Mickey was on Bill Coe, and he could hardly, you know, he would like bark out lines. Sarge, Joan Hogan is the most beautiful girl on the base. He could barely, but Nat Hyken loved him, you know, because he was a character. But as he became older, he became more British somehow.

Oh, this is Mickey the Ripper. Well, we got to know Mickey. He was delightful, and he would have been a great guest for you guys. He sadly died a couple of years ago. Before we started. But he, he loved the book. And in fact,

he actually like made it an industry for himself. He like obtained books wholesale from the publisher and would sell them at radio conventions. Love it. That's a Gilbert move. Jack up the price. Yes. Yes. At Chiller Theater Cons,

he jacked up the price because he had me sign my, you know, do signatures that he would paste on the books and jack up the price and sit there with Larry Storch. And then he would get his friends to call me and say, we want to be in your next book. So I got, you know, a couple of those old timers like Bobby Ramson. Right. And a few of them like called me and Larry Storch too saying, Drew, I'd love to be in your sequel. And so I put them in the sequel.

Of course, I said, when Larry called, I said, it would be an honor. That's nice. Larry Storch, I was once at a convention with him. Yeah. And he wears the Agorn hat. Oh, he sure does. Yeah. He dresses the part.

He's a terrific guy. A wonderful guy. I loved his interview with you guys. He's terrific. He's still kicking. He's 96. I think we did that interview three years ago when he was 93. Yes.

And he's still going strong as ever. We went to his apartment. Yeah. And he showed us, he pointed at the floor. He has these, you know, towels down there. And he goes, I stand on my head every morning. And he said, he asked the doctor, he said, you know, I'm 93. Should I keep

standing on my head at this age? And the doctor said, if you've been doing it this far, no reason to stop. It makes you wonder because, you know, he's still kicking. He's still sharp. He's been a vegetarian for a long time. He's really a beautiful guy.

He's a vegetarian. He loves animals. He used to protect the horses. On the set of F Troop he used to make sure the horses were not abused. But the third phone call that came in after the book was sent out, and this was the phone message. Hello Drew, this is Jerry Lewis. Please call me back.

So I said to Kathy, oh shit, Jerry called. He doesn't sound happy. I was terrified to call him back. We had talked before, and we had nice conversations. But I got up my nerve and called him back. I said, hi, Jerry. So you got the book?

He said, yes, Drew, I got the book. I said, so did you like it? He said, did I like it? Jesus Christ, I loved it. Holy moly, what a book. So I felt so relieved. And, you know, like Gilbert, I've had a very good relationship with Jerry over the years. When I've met him, he's been super generous with me.

He would call me and ask what I was working on. He would ask, Drew, how do you do what you do? And I would, like, talk about my work. It's like, Drew, how do you do what you do? And I would like talk about my work. It's like, whoa. I mean, he'd never talk about himself, but I was always a little nervous with him because, you know, there's certain things you could never bring up. You know, obviously, you know, Dean Martin was a touchy subject. Yeah. The day the clown cried. You didn't want to talk about the Holocaust. You didn't want to bring out, you know, because, you know, he's notorious. If you brought up one little thing, it could end it all. You'd close the door on your face.

So I made sure not to ever bring up Day of the Clown Cried. And the third one was Sammy Petrillo. You know, I was curious about it, but I never brought it up. And so we got along great. And then my friend Dave Abramson, journalist Dave Abramson, is writing a biography of Sammy Petrillo. And I said, well, you know, I think you should really have Jerry. You should really talk to Jerry because, you know, he's the center. Wow.

He's the center of the entire, you know, career of Sammy Petrillo. You don't like this friend very much. Without Jerry Lewis, there never would have been. I said, all right. He says, well, do you think you could, you know, talk to – I said, let me call him and I think I could make it happen. So I did. I called. I got on my nerve once again, said, Jerry, uh, hi Drew. I said, um, I have a friend journalist, you know, you know, I wanted to impress him. Uh, a journalist named David

Abramson, Jewish. That's good. Uh, who's writing a book about, who's writing a book about, get this, Sammy Petrillo. He goes, and he'd love to talk to you. And he said, Sammy Petrillo. Okay. For Drew, for you, I'll talk to him. So Jerry called Dave back. Dave picked up. He was like, he couldn't believe it. And Jerry said, I have one question for you before we speak. Why would you write a book about Sammy Petrillo? And Dave said, well, because it's such an amazing show business story and this man who wanted to be you and became you in a way in his act and then moved away from your world and created his own world in show business and existed for all the... So Jerry bought it and he talked to him for about 20 minutes about Sammy. So the interview... Now,

Sammy, of course, was the Jerry Lewis impersonator. Of course. And Sammy's included in my book because, you know, he starred in the film with Bela Lugosi, who's also in the book. Bela Lugosi meets a Brooklyn Grower with Duke Mitchell, who's the Dean Martin-ish co-star. And it's funny because Sammy Petrillo is a clone of Jerry Lewis. He's amazing. It's spooky. Very scary.

I just watched. This is not on YouTube, but there's a tape of Sammy Petrillo with Eddie Cantor from 1952, right after Jerry had discovered him. And it's uncanny. He's on with Eddie Cantor. And the audience really thinks it's Jerry Lewis. It's crystal clear. And Martin and Lewis had him in one of their sketches.

They just used him once as like Jerry's little brother. Yeah. He pops his head out of a suitcase. Jerry put him under contract but didn't use him beyond that. And that's when Sammy broke off and got the deal to make the movie in Hollywood in the next year, which Jerry was upset about. He never talked to him again after that, the Bela Lugosi film, which is actually a kind of – it's a pretty good film, I think.

William One-Shot Bodine? It's actually better than some or several or a bunch of Martin and Lewis films, not the Frank Tashlin ones but the early ones. It's actually at least on par with it. And then I think Hal, I guess Hal Wallace was the producer of Martin and Lewis. That sounds right. Yeah. And he at first was planning on legally putting a stop to Bela Gossi meets the Brooklyn Gorilla. And then when he, I guess he saw some clips of it.

That's right. And when he saw how bad it was, he thought it's not even worth the trouble. He had to calm Jerry down because Jerry was livid about it. This is what I know about it. Dean was casual. He said, let the boys have their fun. You know, like, who cares? Jerry was livid about it.

But then the film was so atrocious. I think it played for one weekend in Hollywood, maybe one week. And it was gone. But, of course, it's become this huge cult classic. So, you know, Jerry – Sammy Patrell's name kept coming up in Jerry's life. So I was really nervous when I called Jerry and said, would you consult to talk? Would you, you know – I'm surprised he did.

And I heard him. He said, I'll do it for you. Oh, nice. So that's – I mean, I was really touched that he trusted me. and he was in good hands with Dave because the book is going to be incredible. And Dave did a lot of interviews for it, including with Sammy Petrillo himself, hours and hours of interviews. And I heard that Sammy Petrillo one time showed up at a show that Jerry Lewis was doing because he was a fan. Yeah. And Jerry Lewis found out about it and he had Petrillo removed.

Yeah, there are different versions of that. Supposedly Jerry's illegitimate daughter was also in the audience that night. I think it was when Peter Bogdanovich was interviewing Jerry in Times Square and then Sammy was somehow in the front row. It was a completely awkward, I wasn't there, but I heard about it secondhand from a few people. But I think Jerry dealt with it. He kind of ignored the situation. I'm not sure.

Did you meet Sammy Petrillo ever, Gilbert? I never met Sammy Petrillo, although a friend of mine who was a comic, he did a set, and he told me Sammy petrillo was in the audience he was like whatever third rate producer wannabe or agent wannabe whatever nice and he went up to my friend and he said you know i'd like you to be involved with the TV show movie I'm putting together. And the guy goes, well, what? Could you tell me a little about it? And he goes, well, I don't want to tell you too much because I don't want someone to steal

the idea from me. That's Sammy. Sammy claimed he invented the Munsters. He came up with the concept of the Munsters. Yeah, I hadn't heard that. He wrote a script called My Father the Monster. Yes. He claimed he invented the Munsters. He came up with the concept of the Munsters. I hadn't heard that. He wrote a script called My Father the Monster. Yes. He claimed.

Very interesting. He had a lot of claims. He also claimed that he was going to be signed to make 52 movies with Mitchell and Petrillo. But Martin Lewis broke up, so they couldn't sell it after that. But he came up with the number 52 movies he was going to make. Before I forget, guys. The first one made so much money that they had. Oh, wait a second.

Drew brought a prop. I just got this. You can't see it, unfortunately. I just got this in the mail today. Is that Uncle Miltie? It's a Milton Bro puppet from 1950. Oh, we'll have to put this on social media. It's Bryce.

Why is he black? I thought it was Godfrey Cambridge. I guess he hasn't aged. I guess he's black? I thought it was Godfrey Cambridge when you held it up. I guess he's got... I thought it... He moved to Palm Springs, I think that's the thing. Wow.

I thought it was Obama. This is like, you know... I have friends, including Frank, who send me things for my... I was going to ask you. My comedy juseum.

How's the juseum? So my friend John Wendler just sent me this. I just got it today. I had to bring it in for the show. It's beautiful. The Milton Berle puppet. We'll put thisendler just sent me this. I just got it today. I had to bring it in for the show. It's beautiful. The Miltonboro Puppet.

We'll put this up. It's very rare. We'll put it up on social media. It's a thing of beauty. I've heard they're making them more and more. As Kathy pointed out, it's not anatomically correct. But you get the idea. I was thinking of, you know, we're in Times Square.

I was thinking of stopping by and getting a giant dildo. You should have. But it's... Yeah. All right, let's do that. He's going to put his... Let's do that. All right.

Drew is putting on the Uncle Miltie puppet. Please indulge me for... You realize this is radio, right? We're doing Edgar Bergen's act over here. I feel like O.J. Simpson. So we're about to do a dick joke on radio. I feel like O.J. It doesn't fit.

It doesn't fit. Oh, here we go. Okay. Here we go. I don't know why his hands are red. Can you figure it out? No, it's strange. Well, he's black and his hands are red.

Kathy wondered why no cigar, I said. It's like Uncle Miltie and the Mask of the Red Death. It's pretty disturbing, isn't it? It's frightening. But I love it. How is the Jusium? Tell people what's in there. Well, you know, Kevin Doherty, who you're going to be doing

a mini episode with, is filming a documentary about my life and career, Vermeer of the Borscht Belt. So he's going to be filming inside the Juzium. The Juzium is my personal collection of Jewish comedian artifacts, Jewish comedians from the past. You'll have to show it publicly again because the last time you did it was wonderful. Well, he's saving it for the film and I think it's going to conclude the film. Do you have any Gilbert Gottfried ephemera in that museum? Gilbert is too young to include.

Oh, how about that, Gil? I should pick up some Gilbert swag. When he becomes 65, I'll pick up some swag. And I'm way too Gentile. Pick up some swag. And I'm way too Gentile. I haven't. No, I don't have any Gilbert stuff in the museum.

I don't have anything from Jeff Ross. No, none of the younger people. But it's mostly celebrating the old timers, you know. Did you get the Jerry Lewis thing I sent you? I do. That's on display. Yeah, Frank sent me a great Jerry Lewis brochure program from one of his shows with that Jerry Lewis caricature that Jerry used for 70 years. Do you have – what was that show he did, that horrible failure that was like three hours unscripted? The Jerry Lewis show?

Which failure? Most of his TV work. The one on Hollywood Boulevard where they took over the theater and they put all the Jerry – Yeah, they had Jerry Lewis Theater. Jerry Lewis Theater. Yeah. Do you have any of those Jerry Lewis tiles? I don't have a tile, no.

I have a lot of Jerry Lewis stuff. I have a Jerry Lewis ring. I have a Jerry Lewis matchbooks. I have a Jerry Lewis, what's the, it'll come to me. A lot of Jerry Lewis stuff. I love the Jerry Lewis ephemera, you know. I love that even more than his films, actually. The films have their moments, but the ephemera I just absolutely adore.

When did you start this collection? You know, I had a lot of stuff when I was a kid, but then it just started building up. Right. And then when I had my show at the Society of Illustrators for my old Jewish comedian artwork, we thought we'd fill it out with some ephemera in their cabinets, which, so I had the stuff

and then I started acquiring more either through eBay or through friends. So it's like dolls and board games. Board games, dolls. Magazine covers. Toys. Magazines. The entire magazine's record,

lots of record covers. Right, right, toys, magazines, the entire magazines, lots of record covers, records, like hundreds of records. Shoelaces, I have a Pee Wee, what's that? Pinky Lee? Pinky Lee shoelaces, yeah. Yeah, right. Joey Bishop deck of cards, things like that. Right. You know, the weirder things.

Yeah, we got to make a pilgrimage to the house and see this stuff. Now we- It's near the Mount Airy Casino. We'll come. So, you know to make a pilgrimage to the house and see this stuff. Now we... It's near the Mount Airy Casino. We'll come. So next time you play there, stop by. If you showed this to me, I have to apologize, but do you have the Frankenstein cufflinks and tie clips? I don't have the cufflinks. I have a lot.

This stuff is put away or it's in storage now. But I have Big Frankie, the Aurora model. Oh, okay. That's cool. Still built. That's cool. I have a Frankenstein wallet. Remember they were selling the wallets?

Oh, yeah. What kind of executive or businessman would carry a Frankenstein? Remember they had the belt clips too in Famous Monsters? Oh, that's right. Frankenstein's head on the belt clip. You know what I never got? Well, I got that they were just trying to use their old model molds and squeeze more money out of it. Was with the Aurora models. They had their classics, you know, Frankenstein, the Wolfman, Dracula, all the monsters.

classics, you know, Frankenstein, The Wolfman, Dracula, monsters. And then they started coming out with the hot rod monsters, which was all these monsters, but with a car. Was like the Big Daddy Roth stuff? Well, they were popular. So, you know, it was like the monster purists like you and I, I didn't like the hot rod. I didn't say, why is Frankenstein in a filster or a flipster or something like that? Oh, yes. And Dracula's dragster.

And I think Wolfman Wagon or something. Yeah, I didn't like it. But why did we have a problem with that but not with the monsters? No. That was okay. And John Carradine once popped up. Well, he was Mr. Gabin. He was Mr. Gabin.

He was the boss. More than once. More than once. And Uncle Gilbert, of course. Yes. Yes. The creature of the Black Lagoon. Now, what did you think of that when you were a kid and saw Uncle Gilbert show up?

Oh, my God. That was one of those amazing moments. It made for you. He said, thank God Sammy Petrillo created this show. What was Uncle Gilbert's line when he took off his coat? Ooh. I got to get into something a little wetter. He said, let me take off my coat and get

into something wetter. And this is a story I've told before, but I remember I used to read in Famous Monsters of Filmland about that episode of Route 66 with Chaney

Karloff, and Laurie. And I would look every day in the papers to see, because they would rerun it every day. And I would look every day. And the one day I didn't look, that's the day they showed that episode. Yeah. And that was dramatic. We've talked about this because I didn't see it either when it first ran.

And so years later, I think with you, and it wasn't very good. Oh, it was terrible. Yeah. It was promising. When Chaney comes in as, I think, the hunchback to his son's room and kisses him on the head, I think. Yeah. And then Peter Lorre, he wasn't even a monster ever. So they put a big black hat on his head.

Yes. At the end, they're supposed to come out as their classic monsters. So Karloff's in full Frankenstein makeup. Well, they put the head on him, but he's still an old man. So that never quite worked. And then Chaney comes out in his wolfstein makeup. Well, they put the head on him, but he's still an old man, so that never quite worked. And then Chaney comes out in his Wolfman makeup, and then Laurie is wearing a top hat, and, you know, they scream when each one comes out,

and Laurie comes out in a top hat, and I figured at least put in a line where Laurie says, I'm not wearing monster makeup. Yeah. You know, I don't remember any film he was ever in where he wore a top hat. And he was in a lot of horror films. Or really any make monster makeup. No, he never played them.

He could have dressed him as Mr. Wong, maybe. That would have been different. Even those Corman pictures, I don't remember him wearing a top hat. No, he was always himself. I think he wouldn't allow it. pictures I don't remember wearing a top hat no he was always himself I think he wouldn't allow it no he didn't wear a top hat I think Vincent Price wore top hats in the Corman films

and so it's like a fat old man on a top hat basically and then he died I think that was one of his I think he was in the Patsy after that

the Jerry Lewis and that killed him I heard and Carradine Peter Lorre at that point he was just just thrilled to get any work to throw at him. And he did the patchy, and that was the one he hated doing. That was his last film, I believe, 64. I think he died shortly after that.

When did he make Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea? It was right around that time. The movie? Yeah. That was earlier. Yeah, the movie was, the TV show started, I think, 65. It was right around that. The movie? Yeah. That was earlier. Yeah, the movie was, the TV show started, I think, 65, 66,

something like that. But the movie was earlier. So you waited in anticipation for this episode and then when it finally aired, you said, this is shit. And because I was watching it going, you've got these three.

How could you make something bad with these three? You got to. It's true. But, you know, because they show photos in Famous Monsters. And that was a problem. Not a problem. But we'd see photos from Plan 9 from Outer Space in Famous Monsters magazine.

And the photos look terrific. Vampyra and Tor Johnson. Oh, yes. Coming towards the camera. And I thought when I was a kid, and I'm sure Gilbert agrees, that when we finally see this film, it's going to be the most amazing film because look at those photos. Look at the footage at the beginning of Chilla Theater. And then, of course, the word got out that it was the worst movie ever made,

which, of course, it isn't. It's not. But, I mean, it's one of the best, to my mind, one of the best films ever made for many reasons. But the footage of those people prowling around in the graveyard, even though it was plotless, Vampire had no script. She was just raising her hands, walking toward. They still haunt my dreams.

And I remember at the beginning of those chiller movies and everything, they would have clips from everything that all look like these were great. Oh, the shittier films like Attack of the 50-Foot Woman. Oh, yes. And Dracula's Daughter. All those AP films, American International films. They had like, I forget which movie. The She Demons they showed?

But they had a guy in a really shitty gorilla suit. Yeah, like raising his hands. That's on YouTube. It might have been Bob Burns. Oh, it could have been. In a shitty gorilla suit. Yeah, he was his hands. That's on YouTube. It might have been Bob Burns. Oh, it could have been. In the shitty gorilla suit. Yeah, he was a king. He was a shitty movies.

Meryl Markle, just back to Meryl for a second. Her first published work actually appeared in Horror Monsters magazine in 1962. She wrote a letter to Horror Monsters.

Love it. And they printed a letter and printed a photo of her and her brother. She's wearing a vampire mask. But if you remember Horror Monsters, Gilbert, you probably remember Horror Monsters. Love it. And they printed a letter and printed a photo of her and her brother. She's wearing a vampire mask. But if you remember Horror Monsters, Gilbert, you probably remember Horror Monsters. Its sister publication was Mad Monsters. They were really shitty, shitty, famous monsters of film and imitations.

They were so shitty that the paper was yellow when you bought the magazine. Oh, yes. And the photos were all faded already. They looked like they were, you know, it was like the worst quality paper. They smelled bad. But I used to buy them. So I remembered her letter. I liked when famous monsters did this.

And it's something that Dear Abby did, too. Well, naturally. And they have been common. Yeah. Constantly compared. Corey Ackerman and Dear Abby. common yeah uh of cory ackerman dear abby by popular demand we're reprinting ah and so they would uh you know she'd reprint letters right that allegedly these readers were demanding right she reprinted you asked for it and and yeah you asked well no you asked for it were people who were asking for uh can you

please show that picture of uh from frankenstein meets the wolfman i gotta see that those people actually exist where people really writing them saying you gotta reprint that photo from frankenstein's daughter and and then they'd reprint entire articles. Yeah. And then entire issues they were reprinting. Oh, yes. They got so lazy. But did you know, I've heard that Forrest Ackerman was a nudist.

Had you heard that? Was a what? A nudist. A nudist. I mean, he was a lot of things, but I heard he was a nudist. Oh, Lord. So I would imagine that him inviting Tor Johnson to the nudist colony for a weekend. I wanted to do a comic strip about that, and I still might.

Oh, you have to. Last time we talked about Tor showing up on You Bet Your Life. Oh, well, you've seen that footage, right? Tor Johnson. It was 1960. The best thing ever. It's great. There's an edited version of it on YouTube, but I used to have the whole thing.

It's pretty amazing. Do you have anything to ask Groucho about? I think Groucho erased it from his memory. I do have another question for Groucho. Okay. Groucho, why did you hold up Trump's decapitated head? Because Chico needed his money. Thank you. Groucho, why did you hold up Trump's decapitated head? Because Chico needed his money.

Thank you. I'd love to see Groucho holding Trump's decapitated head. I was wondering about that. All right, that clarifies that. Let me ask you a couple of questions and get these out of the way. These are from fans. Grill the guest. We do this on Patreon. Marion Aves, or A-V-E-S, Marion Aves or Aves.

I don't know if you can even answer this one but take a stab at it of all the classic mad artists Drucker, Jaffe, Wolverton, Jack Davis your friend Sergio

who's also your friend these are the ones he lists anyway do you have a particular favorite artist? His name is Marion this guy? Marion

it might be Marion M-A-R-I-O-N okay do I have a favorite mad artist? Marion, it might be. Marion? M-A-R-I-O-N. Okay. Do I have a favorite Mad Arse? Marion may be a female. She may be a she.

I don't think, you know, I love them all so much, like you do, Frank. So, you know, Mort Drucker is a god to me. I wanted to draw like Mort Drucker, and I did for a couple of years. But also Jack Davis and Don Martin and Al Jaffe, and the list goes on. And they become friends. And some of them, like meeting them later on when I became a mad contributor was such a thrill, as you know. And those guys were just all terrific, all sweet and generous. We had Al in here. He's just the best.

Al is amazing. He's 96. He's as sweet as can be. And he's still kicking. Mort Drucker is still around. I don't know how well he's doing. He's out on Long Island. He is.

He is. I'll tell this story quickly. I got a call. No, I got an email from a guy writing. He said, I'm writing an obituary for Mort Drucker. I'd like you to talk about Mort. I said, holy shit, did Mort die? He goes, no, no.

We write these obituaries ahead of time. I said, oh, okay. I was like, I got nervous. So, you know, I talked about Mort, and I think I was very eloquent. So I was thinking, like, well, I can't wait for this to run. And then I thought, like, I got nervous. So, you know, I talked about Mort, and I think I was very eloquent. So I was thinking like, well, I can't wait for this to run. And then I thought like, wait a minute. I don't want this to run. I don't want Mort.

Oh, my God. I don't want Mort Rucker to die. He's the best. So I'm torn. I have mixed feelings about this. How should I feel about that? I don't know. Here's another one quick.

This is from our friend Eric Fusco, and he follows you on Facebook, so he knows that you're obsessed. I know Eric. You're obsessed with odd couple combinations, obscure odd couple. I did a whole blog about it. Yes. So which odd couple combo would you most like to have seen perform the play live? Oh, well, you know, there's so many. Arnold Stang and Milt Kamen, I would have killed to see that.

You know about these, Gil? Yeah, I know. Well, obviously on Broadway was Art Carney. The original were Art Carney and Walter Matthau. And then Eddie Bracken came in and Jack Klugman actually did an early version with Eddie Bracken.

And then I think because they asked him to do the TV show, did Mickey Rooney play? Mickey Rooney and Tony Randall actually did it in Las Vegas. Wow. I've become an expert on this. Give me some other ones. Weirdest comedy. Jamie Farr and William Christopher. I know about that one. Gary

Bergdorf did it. Some of them would appear like Joe Flynn did one, but they didn't mention who the co-star was because he was such a big star. Same with Frank Sutton. He did a version. Frank Sutton? I assume he was Oscar. I assume he was Oscar, but they don't even mention who played Felix. They just got some local actor. Because these were like

dinner theater combinations. But of course, the one that I wish was filmed or I'd kill to see was Don Rickles and Ernest Borgnine. Wow. They did it? They did it, and it was actually directed by Danny Simon, Neil Simon's brother. Incredible. It played in Las Vegas. That one I would

kill to see there you go Eric oh my god and Borg 9 was Oscar and Rickles was Felix but there's you know the strangest combinations

they came up with over the years because it was such a popular play and then there were black versions John Amos did one oh really

yeah I have that that's on the blog I think he it was also one where it wasn't a famous guy. They don't tell you that. He also did Norman Is That You. I know about that.

Before Red Fox did it in the movie. And then, of course, DeMond Wilson and Ron Glass. Yeah, on TV. And then there was one. Cliff Nesthoff sent me an article. It was an article interviewing Marlon Brando in 1968. Okay. Okay, Marlon, what are some of your upcoming projects?

Well, I'm thinking of doing The Odd Couple with Wally Cox in Hollywood. I reprinted the article in my blog, but that didn't happen. Can you imagine Wally Cox? No, that's surreal. No, cannot. It should have happened. Can you imagine what would have been going on backstage how about just olivier and sir ralph richardson doing well olivier and danny and danny k would have been right perfect that's right now you probably have seen this photo

uh uh the well the the director of my documentary, Gilbert. Neil Berkeley. Neil Berkeley. As you forget his name. As I forget his name. Showed me a photo on the internet that is allegedly Brando sucking Wally Cox's dick. Well, okay. Well, there is a famous photo of Brando doing that, but it's not necessarily Wally Cox.

Oh, my God. Now, that photo was supposed to be included in... So, we've got Brando sucking a cock. Yes. Yes. There is a famous photo that was supposed to be included in the first Hollywood Babylon book, That was supposed to be included in the first Hollywood Babylon book, but Kenneth Anger, the author, the guy who put that together, did not include the photo for maybe legal reasons or something. But there's no proof that that penis belonged to Wally Cox.

So were a lot of people saying, hey, that's not Wally Cox. Well, you know, people in the know. You, sir. Are you kidding? That's not Wally Cox. I not Wally Cox. Well, you know, people in the know would have said that. You, sir. Are you kidding? That's not Wally Cox. I knew Wally Cox. I knew Wally Cox. And that, sir, is not Wally Cox's dick. I worked with Wally Cox.

And that is not Mr. Peeper's cock. I'm sorry. Let's talk real quick, too, about your Heroes of the Comics books, which are terrific. Thank you, Frank. Oh, can I ask you, have you ever met Don Martin? No, you cannot ask me that. No. Actually, I did.

I talked to him once. His wife called and said, I'm going to put Don on. So he was, like, amazingly quiet. You know, his work is so wild and out there and crazy and fanatic and so much energy. I could hardly get a word out of the guy. He was almost silent, but he was very sweet. So I talked to him once and he sent me a great cartoon of a guy with warts all over his face and the caption, the balloon says, who the hell is Tor Johnson? That was quite intense. I have that hanging up in my house. But I never got to meet him.

He died shortly after. But he went blind, too. So he went to Cracked Magazine, which was kind of like a comedown for him. I remember, too, and I think it was a major, like, fuck you to Mad Magazine, because when Cracked, I remember seeing that issue of Cracked and the cover said, featuring work by Don Martin. Oh, yeah. They were making a big deal out of him coming over to Cracked. Did you know him, Gil?

Did you meet Don Martin? I never met him. No, I always liked him. He lived in Florida and he was just not a gregarious guy. He was just very low key. You could hardly get a word out of him so but as far as

the heroes of the comics Don Martin's not in there because he never actually did work for comic books but a lot of the mad guys are yeah well Al Jaffe began his career

as an editor for Marvel Comics under Stanley for Timely Comics he was the editor of Patsy Walker and Drucker of course drew

Martin and Lewis comics you've got Gaines and Felsenstein and Bill Gaines was in there and Al Felsenstein and a lot of legends like Stanley Patsy Walker. And Drucker, of course, drew Martin and Lewis comics. You've got Gaines and Feldstein in there. And Bill Gaines was in there and Al Feldstein. And a lot of legends like Stan Lee and Jack Kirby, who just turned 100. And Siegel and Schuster invented Superman when they were teenagers in Cleveland. They were included in these books. It's a sad story, Siegel and Schuster. Yeah, because they got like a couple of hundred.

Well, actually, for the character, they got very little. But they were well employed for about a decade by National Comics. But then they broke off for weird reasons like legal hassles and things. And then one of them wound up blind. The other one wound up as a messenger boy or something for, you know. It was very sad at the end, but then finally DC capitulated and gave them a stipend. But only in the 70s when the Superman movie came out. Yeah, they got under the pressure from a lot of comics professionals and some other people,

including Eli Wallach, some strange people. Oh, interesting. Yeah, got behind this campaign to get these two poor, old, sad, forgotten guys credit on the Superman movie and forever after. And also to get them some money for this character they created that was making billions of dollars for, for national, for, for Warner communications. It's sort of a recurring theme in the book, a recurring motif is how many of these guys, I mean, the book is wonderful in so many ways, the first book and the second one as well. But one of the things that keeps coming up is, is the sadness is how many of these guys

either lost control of their babies. It's true. It was a theme. Or what happened to Bill Finger and Jerry Robinson. But a lot of them were content they did well. Like Jack Kirby, he had a nice career. He was content. A lot of them did well or did okay. They did fine.

They worked in the business. They loved the business. But then there's a guy like Bob Kane who was canny. He acquired the rights to Batman right off the bat. And after that, hired artists, hired writers to do all the work because he had limited drawing abilities to begin with and writing abilities. So another guy, Bill Finger, actually created all that stuff you know about Batman and the whole legend of Batman. Created Robin, et cetera. But to Bob Kane's credit, he did create Courageous Cat and Minute Mouse.

Give him that one. And then he wrote the Marty Allen and- Oh, yes. Buttman and Reuben. Batman and Reuben, which is about 11 minutes long, and it's one of the worst albums ever. But he takes full credit for writing that on the back cover. He's proud of that. Do you know, and I always get it confused, I guess it's Noah, Noah Blank, Mel Blank's son.

Yeah, it's Noel. Noel Blank. Noel Blank, yep. So whatever happened to him? What did he do? I don't know. I know Mel Blank was pushing him to take over when he retired or died to take over the Warner Brothers characters. So he's pushing Noel to imitate Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, Porky Pig, all those characters.

And somehow it didn't happen. Billy West got that gig, obviously. Yeah. And others. A few people. I think Jeff Bergman. I'm not sure Noel had enough. He wasn't his father.

Yeah. So, you know, I think Mel thought it was just a natural progression. One of the other sad stories is Carl Burgess, the guy who created the human torch. Yeah. Sad. He created the human torch, which was revived,

you know, in the sixties in the fantastic four, unbeknownst to Carl Burgess, Carl Burgess wound up drawing for those, uh, those shitty Warren imitation magazines like weird and voodoo. Oh yes. He wound up drawing and editing for those publications.

Kind of sad. But he's in the book because, you know, he was a super talented artist. But he just kind of got the shaft. And, you know, it was kind of sad how he wound up. Now, this is a little off that subject, but do you have anything to ask Groucho about Wally Cox's dick. Subtle. I don't have a question for Groucho about that, but I do have one final question for Groucho. Okay.

Okay, Groucho, why did you cut your six sons out of your will? Because six of them needed a woman. That explains it. out of your will. Because she can't read in the morning. That explains it. With that. Now, is it true that Jerry Lewis's illegitimate daughter is homeless? That's what I've read in Philadelphia.

She roams around. It sounds like she's kind of, you know, maybe not as, you know, not in control of her faculties. Does she often go, why are you out? I assume so. She assumes so. You don't need a DNA test. They say she's crazy.

She just does that. They say she's crazy, so maybe she does. I hear about this. It's like, come on. She's making it up. But then I look at her face and say, yeah, she looks like Jerry. I don't know if he denied it. I think he actually, like, helped support her, raise her, or gave her money or gave her mother money when she was growing up.

So it wasn't like he turned his back or anything. Now, there was some article. I didn't see where it was, though, where it said how she found out that Jerry was dead? Oh, I didn't hear that. No. But, you know, her mother was a showgirl and Jerry, you know, got around. Yeah. You know, he made, you know, when, back in the day.

And so, you know, anything's possible. I don't know much about her. I guess she'd be a good guest. Yeah. You'd have to, like, pick her up. You'd have to find her. I don't think it's going to happen. You'd have to find her I don't think it's going to happen. You'd have to find her

in Philadelphia and drive her up here and feed her. Did Jerry tell you he was going to outlive George Burns? Yes. He told Drew

I'm going to my goal is to outlive Milton Berle and George Burns and make 100 years old. So he didn't quite well he made it to 91. He made it. He was in failing high

for a long time. When Jerry first called me you know it was like oh my God I knew he was going to call because I did a tribute to him in the New York Observer, basically asking for the Academy Awards to give him a special Oscar. It was a full-page piece.

Jerry saw it and called me the next day. And the editor of the Observer, Peter Kaplan, told me, Jerry's going to call you. And I was like, you know, so thrilled. Jerry called. We had a great conversation. But being Jerry Lewisis he had to put me to a test so he said drew what did i invent and i was thinking oh shit what did he invent he was like the pressure was on and then it just hit me video assist that's right video assist and

that's all i care about being remembered for video assist assist. And video assist, of course, is the process of just videotaping your scene before you film it, which he did on the set of The Bellboy, right? Yeah, The Bellboy. The Bellboy. In 1960. So I was off the hook. Very relieved. I found this in doing my research on you.

And yes, I did research, even though I've known you, what, 30 years now? I think we date back that long. Something like this. Yes. This was on one of the- Hang on, Gil. If I may jump in. Go ahead.

Let him jump. Go ahead. If I may jump in. This is about you, though. Let him jump. Do you have anything- I know what's coming. Do you have anything?

I know what's coming. To ask Groucho about Montgomery Cliff's dick. Groucho, why did you attempt to suck Montgomery Cliff's dick? Because Chico needed some money. God, he must have really needed some money. Wow. Well, he was a gambler, right? I thought he was going to go for Andy Devine and Clark Gable there. Oh, well, he came up.

I don't know. He did a sudden turn on me. There's actually another. Gilbert, do you know who had the largest pornography collection in Hollywood? Bud Abbott. Oh, you knew that. Okay. Okay. Yes.

Supposedly Bud Abbott and Luke Costello both had huge pornography collections. But the biggest, according to the FBI reports, was Red Skelton. Wow. Really good. Did you ever know that? See, that doesn't surprise me. This is good trivia. Because I heard with Red Skelton, like during his rehearsals, he was incredibly obscene.

And then that's why sometimes they'll crack up on the show when they'll start to do a bit. Yeah. Because they'll remember from the rehearsal. You know, JB Farr told us he was very bawdy off camera. That's nice to know. Red Skelton. But he had the largest collection of pornography film and photos in Hollywood. This is great.

According to the FBI. And Abbott and Costello each had their individual collections, which were also like substantial, which I think they lost, you know, when the IRS confiscated their. We might get sued yet. This is what I found in the comments section while I was doing research and you were being interviewed. I heard Bud Abbott used to shit on coffee tables.

All right. No, that's not true and neither did Jerry Lewis. It was Danny Thomas and Otto Preminger. That's all I got. Now, they would – I love Otto Preminger. They would lay under the coffee table. We got to get this straight because someday there's going to be a glass coffee table book about this subject.

It's going to be an encore. And there's a lot of witnesses. It's like a Rauschenman type deal. There's a lot of witnesses to it, sort of like the Milton Berle, Forrest Tucker. I'm going to read this if it kills me. Okay. This was in the comments section under a blog or a website where you were doing an interview. And I'm scrolling down and I'm reading the comments,

and everyone's saying Drew's a genius and I love Drew's work and I don't know how he does that. And then I get down to this comment, and this guy says, I heard Gilbert Gottfried used to show up at MAD every month to get a free magazine. Well, you got to ask. They got pictures on the wall of Gilbert. Gilbert, how do you please?

I wouldn't show up every month. Not every month. Okay. I would show up after not being there for a few months. You were getting issues for your kids, right? Yeah. Yeah. Before you had kids. Then I'd say, what issue was the last one I got?

You were looking for older issues so you could sell them on eBay, right? Oh, and at- Lampoon. Oh, this. Yeah, at Lampoon. Oh, and at Lampoon, I used to pick up not just old Lampoons, but I think they— Heavy metals, right? Yeah, heavy metals. Oh, yeah, heavy metals.

Yeah. And like an idiot, all the times I've been up to DC Comics I never took like a thousand copies of the one that Superboy won, that Superman won. You did. That's a missed opportunity. But when you got the heavy metals in Nash Lampoon's home did you sell them on the sidewalk? No, I wasn't that bright. Was it a Superboy comic? A Superman comic. Superman. Those are available.

I think I saw them online. Yeah. It's probably $1,000. No, it's a couple bucks. It's probably like 50 cents. I sold all my comic books off years ago. I had huge stacks of them. I said, what am I going to do with this shit?

They're turning yellow. So I sold them all off for $500 about 25 years ago because we had a small apartment, the apartment Gilbert used to visit in the East Village. So they were just, you know, Kathy and I just said like, you know, we don't want to create this stuff around anymore because we were moving to the country. I just sold them off. I kept a couple of samples, but I just sold them off. Before we go, do you want to say anything about Frances Bavier? Well, it's like people are obsessed with her taint. I don't know why that is. Who are these people?

You know, Facebook friends and the like, relatives. I see. She's come up on this show. Frances Bavier. Clint Howard. She and Andy Griffith hated each other. That I did not know. They did.

Yeah, Really. Frances Bavier, she came up because they, you know, one of these phony Facebook posts or online posts, they came up with a photo of Gloria DeHaven from 1948 saying, here's Frances Bavier in 1936. It was a sexy Gloria DeHaven in a bathing suit. So I knew instantly it wasn't, you know, Frances Bavier. So I did the research and like found photos of Frances Bavier when she was young. She looked like you would expect her to look. But I also drew a picture of her in a bikini.

I drew a picture of her for an Andy Borowitz piece in TV Guide of her in a bikini. I remember. So I included that in the blog to look, look, here's what a sexy Frances Bavier looks like. So you can see it. If you go to my... If you Google Frances Bavier, Drew Friedman, you can see the image. It's like I'd heard that Andy Griffith and her

immediately hated each other. Well, she was a refined stage actress from Broadway, and he was like, you know, a kind of, you know, he was a comedian doing the Huckleberry Hound voice. And that, when they did the TV movie, like Back to Mayberry or something, they had all the old, they even had Otis the Drunk,

although he wasn't a drunk anymore. Oh, they sobered him up, really? Yeah. Yeah, they cleaned up Otis. Why would they do this? That's sad. And, you know. Howard Sprague.

Even, yeah, everyone who was alive. Right, Gomer Pyle. But it starts off with a funeral. Ah. Where it's Andy standing over the gravestone of Aunt Bea. Was she dead at the time? She was alive at the time. Oh, wow.

That hurt. To make it hurt even worse, he's hearing her voice talking to him, and they got an imitator. Oh, wow. Going, Andy, make sure to brush your teeth. Oh, what a nightmare. I did watch that. I don't remember that.

But I remember Gomer Pyle working back at the gas station. And I thought, what a comedown. I mean, he was like a respected Marine. You thought he was really going places. Had a military career? Yeah, he was like, you know, he was really going places. And then he's back at the Philly. How did that happen?

And the other thing was Ronnie Howard played Opie, but he's all bald with a big comb over. And Andy still has the big thick head of hair. How did that happen? You know what I remember from that? Is that when he sees Opie and they both shake each other's hand and I'm saying, no, no.

Why aren't they hugging each other? This is Sheriff Taylor and his son Opie. They should be hugging. It's an outrage. They hadn't seen each other for years? Yeah. It was like Opie left Mayberry for some reason and then came back? He became like an editor

of a newspaper. Oh, in Mount Pilot? Publisher. It's like when Red Fox left Sanford and Son all of a sudden, it's like, why would he leave and all of a sudden Lamont is living with Grady? It's like it never made sense to me. The Sanford arms. They seem so close. Right, right, right. And then they brought in Delory. Why would he leave and all of a sudden Lamont is living with Grady? It's like it never made sense to me. I know.

The Sanford Arms. They seem so close. Right, right, right. And then they brought in Delores. It just never clicked. Here's a story I heard. No ending to this episode. I'm sorry.

That's okay. Here's a story I heard. He doesn't like to rap. This is the final story. That Francis Bouvier. Bouvier. Bouvier. You put her in the Kennedy family. Bouvier. Bavier. Bavier. You put her in the Kennedy family.

Bouvier. I really am still crying over the death of my cousin JFK. I think Peter Lawford fucked her. Isn't that possible, Frank? It's possible. I know everyone responsible for his death. So Frances Favier, I heard, became a recluse, and she was one of those that owned a thousand cats.

Like Sandy Dennis. She had been dead for a while before they found her. Nice. And that the cats were eating her dead. Oh, no. That's a nice thought. Is that what we're going out on? I have the Frances Bavier cookbook. Do you have that? No. It exists. It's like all her recipes and somehow they licensed the Andy Griffith show because it's like Andy and Opie and Aunt Bea eating on the cover and stuff. But, you know, I've gotten some good recipes out of it. And most of them are for cat food. Now, do you want to

talk about the death of Francis Pompier? If you could change one thing about the world, Drew, what would it be? Francis Pompier of all you know. If you could change one thing about the world, Drew, what would it be? Oh, well, Jesus Christ.

Do you know how you answered this? Someone asked you this. One thing about the world? You know what you said? I wouldn't answer any stupid questions. You said you would bring Shemp back from the dead.

Oh, I did answer that. All right. Well, that's what I kind of did in my new book. I have him three times he's in the book. Good segue. Chosen People. Fan of graphics book. Thank you.

When does it come out? Comes out early November, and Frank and I are doing a book launch for it at the Strand Bookstore on November 15th. So if you're in New York, please come to that. Come to that. And I also want to plug Heroes of the Comics and more Heroes of the Comics, which are tremendous. I found things out. I didn't know that C.C. Beck modeled Captain Marvel

after Fred McMurray. Well, you look at the image and it's there. You can see it. There's a ton of good stuff in there and a ton of heartbreaking stories, too. That's true. Gilly? Yes. What do you think? Yes.

Well, first... Should we let this man go home? Do you want to ask Groucho about the death of Francis Bavier? We're not leaving here. He's a dog with a bone. Groucho. What can you say? Why did you let Francis Bavier lay dead in her house for months?

So her cats could eat her? Lord. Because Chico needed her money. There you go. Full circle. I knew there was a good reason. Marie Prevost I knew about. She was the silent film star that was eaten by her dog.

There were a lot of... But I didn't know about Frances Bobbier. Yeah, I don't know if that's true. I don't think it is. I think Louis Stone who played Andy Hardy's dad.

I think he was alive when they found him. He had been stabbed. Did Gig Young, after he killed that girl, did he... Gig Young, he shot himself. Yeah, he killed.

That's right. At least, yeah. This is ending on a real sweet note. I think Aunt Bea used to shit on George Lynch. I didn't say that. The host said that. Yes. Frank, take control.

Some weeks it's just hopeless. Anything else to plug? That's it for now, I think. Okay. Just – And you're going to draw the – What's that? The thing you said you were going to draw.

Which is – oh, Tor Johnson and Forrest J. Ackerman. Yes, I'm going to get home and get right to that. Okay. Naked, naked, naked. And Forrest J. Ackerman. Yes, I'm going to get home and get right to that. Okay. Naked, naked, naked.

So I'm Gilbert Gottfried, and this has been Gilbert and Frank's. Nope, not that one. Oh, that's right. That's coming up. I'm Gilbert Gottfried, and this has been Gilbert Gottfried's amazing, colossal podcast with my co-host, Frank Santopadre, and the man who has endless questions to ask Groucho, Drew Freeman. God bless Bobby Barber. That's all I can say. I'm giving him his due.

Thank you, Drew. Thank you, Drew. Thank you, guys. Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast is produced by Dara Gottfried and Frank Santapadre, with audio production by Frank Verderosa. Our researchers are Paul Rayburn and Andrea Simmons. Thank you. their assistance.