Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - 199. Eddie Deezen

Episode Date: March 19, 2018

Actor Eddie Deezen ("Grease," "1941," "The Polar Express") joins Gilbert and Frank for a look back at his memorable roles in iconic '70s and '80s movies, his early days as a stand-up comic and his unforgettable encounters with Andy Griffith, John Belushi, Jerry Lewis and Mickey Rooney. Also, Eddie loses his lunch, Jack Nicholson loses his cool, Morgan Fairchild turns on the charm and Count Dracula shares the screen with "Weezie" Jefferson. PLUS: Remembering Marvin Kaplan! The return of Fake Shemp! The cinema of Fred Olen Ray! Steven Spielberg presents the Beatles! And Gilbert sings the theme from "Zapped!" This episode is brought to you by Leesa (www.leesa.com/GILBERT), Just For Men (www.jfmgrowhair.com code: Regrowth25, and Babbel (www.babbel.com/GILBERT code: GILBERT). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Like our new flake-outs, there are delicious twists on the croissant donut with 24 layers of croissant flakiness twisted with fancy donut fun. Get ready to go all out for less. Hi, this is Gilbert Gottfried, and this is Gilbert Gottfried's amazing, colossal podcast with my co-host, Frank Santopadre. We're once again recording at Nutmeg with our engineer, Frank Furtarosa. Our guest this week is a popular and very likable comedic actor who's appeared in dozens of films and television shows. Maybe you've seen him or heard his distinctive voice on shows such as Monk, Life with Louie, Duck Hard, I Wanna Hold Your Hand, the SpongeBob movie, the Polar Express, and the film we all enjoy discussing on this show, Steven Spielberg's old star comedy, 1941. In a career that started back in the late 1970s, he's worked with Tom Hanks, John Travolta, worked with Tom Hanks, John Travolta, Tim Conway, Sid Caesar, Andy Griffith, Christopher Lee, Robert Zemeckis, and even Mike Mazurki, as well as former podcast guests Chuck McCann,

As guests, Chuck McCann, Dick Miller, Will Jordan, Rick Overton, and Matthew Broderick. In addition to being a busy actor and voice actor, he's also a pop music and comedy historian. and comedy historian, and an authority on the Beatles, as well as classic film comedians, including the Mox Brothers, the Three Stooges, Martin and Lewis, Laurel and Hardy, and Buster Keaton, to name a few. Please welcome to the show a frequently requested guest, a funny and engaging performer, and a man who once appeared on the Gong Show, only to be gonged by another guest of the podcast, our pal Eddie Deason. It is my pleasure. Beautiful.

When I die, you're going to do my eulogy. So beautiful, Gilbert. So beautiful. You know what I was expecting? Gilbert said, and Eddie is a frequent. I thought he was going to say, Eddie is a freak. I thought he was going to say, Eddie is a freak. I thought he was going to say, don't get personal. I thought you were going to cut off right there.

No, frequently requested. Frequently requested. So nice of you. Such a beautiful tribute. It's true. By Gilbert Gottfried. So nice. Now, this is funny.

I don't think we've ever met. No. But I used to host USA Up All Night. I used to watch it, yeah. And pretty much every film there, they'd all be like teen sex comedies. Right. And pretty much every film you would pop up in yeah I used to work all the time back in the day yeah yeah good old days yeah and how so you started out wanting to be a stand-up

comic I did well you know Gilbert it wasn't that I wanted to it was more like an enforced reality it was more like I had there's nowhere to go get out the Hollywood. This is how corny and green I was. You want to hear the corniest, greenest person. I go there. I call the studios. Do you need a good comedian? I called Paramount studios, a lady. Do you need a good comedian? No son, or send your picture. I was that corny and stupid. And I'd call the studios and ask him, you know, one lady said, I remember she said, I'll pray for you, son. She said, I remember. So I got nowhere, you know? So we had the comedy store, which, she said, I'll pray for you, son. She said, I remember. I actually thought it was an act. So I got nowhere. So we had the comedy store, which you know, Gilbert.

And the comedy store, anybody could go in. Any schlemiel could go in. So I went in and I performed at the comedy store. That was how I got started. But I didn't like, like you, it's a fish to water. You love it. I could tell by your film and just by knowing you, that's your thing. But I didn't like it.

I have a hard time remembering routines. And I have my routines. I write them on an index card I couldn't remember lines so I'd read it off hi da da da they they clap they go this is Eddie Dees and they clap sure but will you respect me in the morning that was my opening line and I'd read the whole routine down in lines yeah oh you couldn't memorize anything you had to have I couldn't memorize it I don't know how they can memorize their stand-up routines. I don't know how you guys can do that. And you had that trouble when you got into movies. Yeah, I always had the trouble. I did it early, Gilbert. Early on, I could do it better. If you see a film like I Want to Hold Your Hand, I talk a lot.

Or Mob Boss, I talk a lot. But by the time we got to War Games, which we can get into later, it started with the cue cards. I started to need the cue cards. I was costing the studios money then. How long did you try your hand at stand-up, Ed, before you decided? I did three routines.

I did two comedy stores in LA on Sunset Boulevard, that one, and then I did one in Westwood. I tanked, and I go, this isn't for me. I don't like it. And then I did my stand-up routine on The Gong Show

where Paul Williams gonged me. That was the last time I did it. Well, yeah. I was just going to ask you that. Now we know who the former podcast guest was Williams gonged me. That was the last time I did it. Well, yeah. I was just going to ask you that. Now we know who the former podcast guest was that gonged you. Yeah, Paul Williams. Wonderful guy. So it really wasn't haunting you all those years with hatred for Paul Williams?

No, not at all. What was Barris like? Oh, wonderful guy. Chuck Barris was the nicest guy, and I did my routine. I got gonged with two jokes left. Paul Williams gonged me. As I was walking off, J.P. Morgan gave me my first validation. He goes, Eddie, we love you. She yelled out and I walked off. So anyway, we were on the end of the show. If you remember the end of the gong show, we all waved to the audience at the end. They play the song. And Chuck Berris comes over to me. He goes, Eddie, you got a good little act there. I think you can go somewhere. He said something really nice to me. And that was how it was just a nice thing. Then I saw Chuck Barris about 30 years later in Beverly Hills. I'm crossing the street to go to my agency. I look over, there's Chuck Barris there. Mr. Barris, I was on the gong show. He didn't know who I was. He had not a clue. He looked at me and he gave the Chuck Barris smile, you know, and he nodded his head with his squinty eyes, you know, nice guy.

But you know how you know when a person doesn't know who you are. Yeah. And he goes, oh, it's good to see you. And he walked off. then it's the last time I saw him complicated man as it yeah as it turns out his books are wonderful have you read them yeah well I read confessions of a dangerous mind yeah they're wonderful yeah they're insane the scream yeah totally insane so so ed you start you realize stand-up wasn't for you you couldn't memorize things you started on you started going to memorize things. You started going to auditions? Right. I started going to auditions, and then finally I lucked out.

I got grease. After two years of goofing around, I got grease. Yeah. And you didn't have an agent or anything. I had. She was kind of a manager, more of an agent. Somehow she got me into the grease audition. I don't know to this day how she did it.

But I go in. I slick my hair with Brylcreem, which doesn't fit Eugene, but I did that. I put on the first Pee Wee Herman suit. I put on a white suit with a bow tie and white bucks, which is what Pee Wee wears now. I went in the audition. Everybody there is like a Fonzie guy. I was the only geek there. It was a room full of like 100 Fonzies and all these girls in poodle skirts. Then I go in and read my role.

I had like four lines. Gilbert, you'll know this from an audition. You know if you're doing good or bad. And I went in and I just said my lines. You know, I go, hi, or whatever, these little insipid lines. And I looked up and I saw Joel Thurm and the director, Randall Kleiser. They were like nudging each other. They were like going.

And I knew I was doing good because they nudged each other. And then later I got it. Yeah. Was a legendary Alan Carr in the room? Alan, I think, yes, yes it was alan was there alan randall kleiser and joel thurb were there yeah yeah now the one film which seems like it was uh produced for you pretty much but you weren't in and you were the king of the nerds. Yes. In every other movie. Yes. What movie were you not in? Revenge of the nerds.

Yes. Revenge of the nerds. Yeah. That's the twilight zone. That's the twilight zone, which we all have a little twilight zone in our lives. So I finally did, I did a turkey film with those guys.

It was called, um, Oh, the whoopie boys. Oh yeah. The guys that produced that did The Whoopie Boys. I think that was the one. I think it was The Whoopie Boys.

But anyway, I asked the guy. He was a real nice guy. His name was Adam. Adam something. He produced Revenge of the Nerds. And I said, why wasn't I in Revenge of the Nerds? He said the joke of Revenge of the Nerds is they wanted to get guys and dress them up to look like nerds. They wanted to get regular guys and make them look like nerds.

He goes, you're already a nerd. He goes, we can't do anything with you. So, okay, that's ironic, but I'll accept that. But that's the story. But I get asked that all the time. And I get, Gilbert, this probably doesn't happen to you because you're so unique. But I get mistaken for that guy all the time. They go, oh, you're the guy in Revenge of the Nerds.

Was it Robert Carradine? Robert Carradine. All the time. That and Pee Wee Herman, I get. Pee Wee Herman, I get. You're Pee Wee, right? Yeah. They didn't want you because you were perfect for the part.

Exactly. Exactly. You might have had a shot. Do you know, I have a vague recollection of auditioning for the Whoopi Boys. Is that right? Yeah. You would have been Is that right? Yeah. You would have been great in it. Yeah.

It was a fun little film. Not great, but it has its funny moments. What was the Whoopi Boys about? I'm trying to find it in my notes. Whoopi Boys was a buddy comedy. Oh, Denzel O'Melliot was in that. Yes, Denzel O'Melliot was a great guy. Yeah, wonderful guy.

And Mike Wokeef and Paul Rodriguez were the buddies. Mike Wokeef, right. And they're kind of like the, you know, it's kind of like an animal house. They're kind of like John Belushi slobs, you know. And we go to a charm school. It's like the Three Stooges. It's a charm school thing. And we go to a charm school and we're at the mayor's and we foul up. You know, we dance with chicken legs and all this stuff. I got a couple of more questions about Grease. Sure. First of all, I found a thing. Jack Nicholson was shooting nearby? Yes. Jack Nicholson was shooting nearby?

Yes. Jack Nicholson was on an adjoining soundstage. So Jack Nicholson, I swear to God, he'd look out the window and he'd shake his fist as corny as he... Can I cuss on here? Yes. Shut the fuck up. Turn the fucking music down. He'd shake his fist at us all the time.

So then one day he comes on the set and I, you know, i bounced over to him it was the first guy ran up and i got to shake his hand he gave me a big smile super nice guy and i remember him nodding his head and you know you're looking at freaking jack nicholson's on the set i wonder what he was shooting it was it wasn't much yeah it wasn't missouri breaks i think missouri breaks was a little before it was uh one of those in that era. Yeah, that's fascinating. So he wanted a musical to shut down their music. Right, exactly, yeah. But he's Jack Nicholson, you know,

you guess what he was, you know. Tell us about driving back home with Sid Caesar. Oh yeah, okay, so every night on the set, I was driven home with Sid Caesar in a limo. Our driver was a guy called Kirk, and he comes over. He gives me one rule he got to follow. Don't talk unless Mr. Caesar talks to you. Okay, so I'm a little schmuck, you know, I don't know. Okay, share it. So I sit in the backseat every night, and Sid Caesar would pontificate in the front seat. He was a very intelligent man,

and he talked, he liked history. He'd go, the Goths would go in and raid the villages, and the Visigoths would take them and the Vandals. And I remember him talking all this history stuff. And he'd do this every night. And I'd listen to Sid Caesar pontificate about history and all his opinions. I don't remember exactly what he said, but I remember that he was intelligent.

He wasn't necessarily a warm man or a nice man, but he wasn't a mean man, but he was just, he was an intelligent guy. And one night was the only time he turns back to me, and he goes, so you're the water boy, huh? I go, yes, sir. I said something insipid. It caught me totally off guard.

I said, is it all right if I talk now? I said, or some kind of stupid thing. And he just nodded and he went on. And then he pontificated. And that was the only time I talked to Sid Caesar. Did you ever meet Sid Caesar, Gilbert, in your travels? No, no. I was at some show where I was honoring him.

No, no. I was at some show where I was honoring him, and he was there with, what's her name? Imogene Coca? Imogene Coca. Okay. And I watched them perform, but I never met. I heard his name's popped up on this podcast a few times. Yeah, he's a legend.

Troubled guy. Yeah. They said he was one of those people who, if he wasn't doing a character, he didn't exist. That's interesting. Yeah. He's one of those, just to give my honest opinion, the most overrated guy. My dad loved him. I think our dad's generation, they let him go, this guy's the Charlie Chaplin of TV.

So I started watching the films of him, and I'm just sitting there,'s nothing he did one funny one where he did a satire of uh this is your life the ralph yeah that was funny and i worked with howie morris a couple times he was a great guy i thought he was funny but i never thought since he's just funny i thought he had the face of a heavy he had this face it looked like a killer in a film noir you know like mark lawrence yeah it wasn't conducive to comedy yeah so that was kind of off right there and i yeah and i can see some talent though he'd do those foreign accents you know i can see he was great at that he was yeah but he gifted it yeah just viscerally he never made me laugh he's just one of those was there a jeff connor go ahead gil howard morris one time called me a loud mouth fucking jew why what happened

which is an honor yeah why did he do it gilbert it was actually oh he was at that autograph show we went to at the beverly garland hotel yeah i took gilbert to an autograph show in the 90s and he walked in and uh he didn't know that he had just passed Howard Morris, who I believe was dressed as Ernest T. Bass at the time. Yes. In the overall. Just shouting out at Gilbert, there goes that loudmouth fucking Jew. No kidding. Yeah. He was very nice though.

In other words, he was being facetious. He was kidding. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, good. He was busting. Good, good. Was there a Jeff Conaway story, Eddie, before we jump off grease sure Jeffy was uh troubled guy we did grease yeah he was a very troubled guy he was the only cast member I didn't like I was scared to death of him he tried to get me laid when we did grease he tried to get me fixed up with a hooker I've never been with a woman I don't think I'd even touched a woman at

that time but he tried to get me laid and I remember being in my dressing room I was scared to death you know but it never came to pass But Jeffy was that kind of a character. And then later on, we became really close friends. We did a lot of signing shows together. And he was like a brother to me. He kind of mellowed out. But the Grease years, he was a scary character. I remember him going, oh, Hitler. Pat Birch was giving us the dance instructions. And she was going, and you women dance there. And the men go there. And I remember Jeff goes oh hitler he said roll out and it was like dead silence it was one of those awkward moments wow anyway we go to see jeff jeff was like in greece we do the signing shows and jeff had had nine back operations he was like all gnarled and messed up and hunched over but we go

to the signing shows and the teenage girls will come and giggle over him you know they were seeing kenicky they didn't see jeff there they were seeing Kinnicky. They didn't see Jeff there. They were seeing the guy he played in Greece. Anyway, the last time I saw Jeff, he was in a wheelchair and I wheeled him around. We went to like he was living in this old folks home. It was this place Clark Gable used to own. And all there were like these 90 year olds living there and Jeff Conaway's living there. And we all sat around all the grease cast were there.

We all had corned beef sandwiches. We ordered deli sandwiches and sodas. And I wheeled Jeff around in the wheelchair. He gave me a tour of his home. And, you know, I almost want to cry, you know. I love the guy, but I'm looking at this Greek Adonis from Greece. He's this gnarled guy in a wheelchair. And then Jeff died about a year after that.

Yeah, he did a lot of damage to himself. He did a lot of damage to himself, yeah. And he was in that that i remember at the end his most famous thing was being one of the patients of dr drew oh is that right yeah i didn't know that reality and it was just a freak show yeah yeah it was bad for him eddie we have to ask you about Laser Blast. Okay, that's the one film I die in. Did Laser Blast come out before Grease? Laser Blast, yes.

Grease was the first film I was ever in, but Laser Blast came out first. Laser Blast was March 1st of 78, and then Grease came out June 16th, 78. The legendary Charles Band. Yes, Charles Band. I wonder if he's still around. He'd be good for us. Oh, he'd be great. Yeah, yeah.

Charlie Band. I haven't seen him since then. And Fred Olin for us. Oh, he'd be great. Yeah, yeah. Charlie Band. I haven't seen him since then. And Fred Olin Ray, another guy you've worked with a million times. Fred and I were pals on Facebook. Yeah, Fred Olin Ray would love you, Gilbert. He'd love it. We got to get him on. I was looking at his IMDb page.

He's made like 200 movies. He's got a million stories. That's a crazy amount of... Yeah. He's got some Hunts Hall stories and some great... Wow. He worked with some great people. Oh, we'll get him on. They didn't want to hire Hunts Hall stories and some great people. They didn't

want to hire Hunts Hall for his film. It was like $1,500. They go, we can't afford it. And he goes, are you freaking crazy? It's Hunts Hall. He goes, I'll pay out of my pocket. And he paid the $1,500 to get Hunts Hall in one of his movies. Love it. On Laser Blast, did you interact with a guest that we had on this

show, Gianni Russo from The Godfather? Gianni, I don't remember him. I had a crush on a girl, Betty Goldberg, and the script girl. And then Laser Blast. Oh, yeah, it was just a cheap film. We did Grease, which was in Paramount, a real cool film. And then I learned what a low-budget film was with Laser Blast. We're all in one big warehouse, and you're sitting on Apple boxes.

That was our dressing room. You could tell it's low-budget because they misspelled Roddy McDowell's name in the credits. That's a bad sign. Laser blast is a turkey. It's not worth anything. But watch the Mystery Science Theater satire. Oh, yes, I'm familiar with that, too. It's one of the funniest things they've ever done.

Yeah. Well, then tell us about Midnight Madness, which I think is Michael J. Fox's first part. Yes. Michael J. Fox was the nicest guy. We'd sit and have lunch together. OK, we we both love the Twilight Zone. We're Twilight Zone. That's what we talk about. He was just kidding. He's rather straight in the movie. So Mike, when I after lunch, we get a Super Bowl out. We play soup. We play handball against the brick walls of Disney Studios together.

Nicest kid ever. So then about eight years later, cut. I'll go back to Midnight Madness, but cut that like eight years later, I'm hanging out at Universal Studios. I had an audition or something. This red Ferrari or whatever, red sports car zooms up. I look down, this is little Michael J. Fox.

Same guy, but he's, this is after Back to the Future. He's the biggest star in showbiz. It's like one of these corny B movies with Humphrey Bogart. You know, you go back home.

He couldn't have been nicer. He goes, Eddie, how are you? It's like, you know, you meet these big stars, and it's like there's totally the nicest people. It happens almost every time. But he hadn't changed at all.

We reminisced a little. He drove off in his sports car, and that's the last time I ever saw him. One of Gilbert's favorites is in that movie, David Naughton. Oh, yes. Have you guys have hit him on this show? No, we got to have David.

He's a wonderful guy. Yeah, super nice guy. We'll get him. Yeah. Yeah. And you were in a movie that promised itself to be a great jerk off film, but wasn't. Which one is that? But I like the music in it.

Zapped. Oh, zapped. Yeah, with Scott Baio, the infamous Scott Baio. Yeah. Yeah. He's infamous this week. He's infamous. Did that surprise you? Boy, I thought, what's his name? Charlie Rose surprised me.

But Scott Baio surprised me. But we'll see what happens. Yeah. You like the, what is it, David Pomerantz music? Oh, yes. In Zapped? Yeah, and I think Charlie Fox. Was it Charlie Fox? I think so. Oh, we got to get him in here.

Yeah, and yes, something's happening to me. Where is that quiet kid I used to be? Not long ago, one i used to know suddenly my life has changed suddenly my whole world's rearranged turned inside out makes me wanna shout here i am take a look at me I'm high as a kite and I'm twice as free like a dream that was meant to be. Ready or not, I'll take my shot because I'm ready to get what you got if you're ready or not. Incredible. It was very beautiful. Wasn't that beautiful, Eddie?

Were you bar mitzvahed, Gilbert? No. Were you bar mitzvahed, Gilbert? No. Were you bar mitzvahed? I was going to say, did you sing your mafter? How come you weren't bar mitzvahed? No, I was a bad Jew. I was not bar mitzvahed. The world could have been treated to that voice.

Yes. So much earlier. Gilbert Gottfried singing his mafter would have been a classic, yeah? Yeah, it's like my whole thing. I've said it before about being a Jew. I don't know the holidays. I eat pork, but I know that if the Nazis came back, I'd be on the train with everyone else. So you never fasted on Yom Kippur or anything like that? No, no.

Did you get presents for Hanukkah? No, no. I've never done any of those things. Oh my God. You were... Yeah. You're such a bad Jew. You guys were beyond...

You were beyond reformed. You were beyond reformed. Yeah, relaxed. There's conservative... Yeah, relaxed, right? Frankie and his valley. We were that group, yeah. Frankie goes to Hollywood, yeah relaxed, right? Yeah. Frankie and his valley. What were that group? Yeah.

Frankie Goes to Hollywood. Yeah. Frankie Goes to Hollywood. Good reference. Right, relaxed. Yeah. Did you work with our friend Marvin Kaplan in Midnight Madness? Did you know Marvin?

Yes, Marvin Kaplan was a great guy. I saw him at- Sweetest. About five years ago at a health food store. A health food place. Great. And we talked and reminisced a little. He was a wonderful guy.

The best. Yeah. Yeah. We had him on our show and just like, oh, he passed away like just two weeks later or something. Is that right? So that was his last performance. Yeah.

He didn't make it to 90. Such a sweet guy. Yes, he was. Super nice guy. Yeah. Now, Eddie, at that time, and Gilbert and I were talking, you were a busy actor. You were getting so many parts that you were turning parts down? Yes, I turned down, what was that good one?

Oh, yeah, Meatballs, one of my regrets. They wrote the role of Spaz for me, but Jack Bloom got it. But it was written for me, but I couldn't do it because I was doing 1941 at the time. That's the irony of it. I'd give anything for this work nowadays, but in those days, I was working on it. You couldn't work with Bill Murray because you were working with Belushi. Exactly, yeah. That's the irony of it. I'd give anything for this work nowadays, but in those days... You couldn't work with Bill Murray because you were working with Belushi.

Exactly, yeah. There's an irony there. Because you were doing a Steven Spielberg film. Yeah, excuse us. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you would have been perfect in that part too, by the way.

Yeah, I would have loved to have done that. And I would have loved to work with Bill Murray. I love Bill Murray. We'll jump around here a little bit, but this is one I found.

A movie, they changed the title to Desperate Moves, but it was called Stiegler and Stiegler. Is that the skating movie? I don't know, but this was, I think, the first time you worked with the legendary Christopher Lee. Oh, that was the skating movie. That was called, yeah, it might have been Desperate Moves. Desperate Moves, they renamed it. If you guys remember, in the late 70s, there was a big skating fad. And this was a skating club. And that's where I met my wife. I was married one time for two years.

And that's where I met my wife. We later got married in Las Vegas. And we saw on our honeymoon, get this, we saw Bill Cosby in Las Vegas. Wow. That might have been an omen. You're right. So prophetic. You're right.

You're right. Another one of those dangerous names to bring up. Yes. Yeah. I'll do a whole show of them. I appreciate the fact that in Stiegler and Stiegler, and I didn't know it was an ice skating movie, Christopher Lee's in the cast, you and Wheezy Jefferson. Yes.

This is Jefferson. This is a super nice lady. If you didn't know that she co-starred with Christopher Lee, you would be wrong. That was probably her only film, right? Isabel Sanford? Isabel Sanford. Yeah. Really nice lady.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now, what was Christopher Lee like? The nicest gentleman, Gilbert. Total gentleman, a total mensch. Just the nicest guy. I did three films with him, and he's the nicest guy in the world. Always, hello, this distinguished guy, but a regular nice guy. Great guy. This is the first time

I've heard Christopher Lee described as a total mensch. Yeah. He claimed, whether it's true or not, that he claimed that he killed Nazis. Yes! Yeah, with his bare hands. In World War II? Is that right? Yeah, in

some cases. Oh my God! Yeah. That's interesting? Yeah, in some cases. Oh, my God. Yeah. That's interesting. Well, good for him. Well, that was what was said about him, that he was a Nazi hunter. Yeah, although I've heard mixed stories. Yeah, we're trying to get to the bottom of it.

Some people say totally good soldier, but he wasn't any big hero. Right. That's interesting. You worked with him again in a movie called Rosebud Beach Hotel. Rosebud Beach Hotel. Christopher Lee was all three turkeys, and then I did one called Silence of the Hams with him.

Right. Three out of three turkeys, yeah. Right, right, right. Probably the three low points of his career he did with me. Well, go ahead, Gil. Now, Silence of the Hams. With Dom DeLuise. Yes.

Tell us the cast. That was okay. It had, like, every ahead, Gil. Now, Silence of the Hams. With Dom DeLuise. Yes. Tell us the cast. That was okay. It had like every Bush Belt comic. Leslie Nielsen. Unfortunately, I would love to have met him, but I never met him. But I did see Andy Griffith. There was a scene in the movie that was cut out, and Andy Griffith is sitting on the toilet. And he walks off, and I'm like a little lackey.

And I run up, and I pull a cord, and they flush the toilet. And it was a funny little bit, but for some reason, they cut it out. It was just a brief scene they cut out. Anyway, I want to meet Andy Griffith cord and they flush the toilet. And it was a funny little bit, but for some reason they cut it out. It was just a brief scene they cut out. Anyway, I want to meet Andy Griffith. Andy frigging Griffith. You know, of course I want to meet him. I love the guy.

So I said, I'm looking down there. He has a boot on this guy. Get my goddamn boot off. We have Frank. Take my whatever the guy's name was, his assistant. Get my boot. He was the meanest guy ever. Just scary from what I saw.

I was terrified. I don't want to go near this guy. Get my boot off. the meanest guy ever just scary from what i saw i was terrified get me some coffee and he's yelling out these orders and this is andy griffith i watched the show today i watched the show today and i love the guy but i was scared i didn't want to some of these guys the aura you know you don't approach them and this was one so i never approached any i saw him there but I don't want to get anywhere near him which movie is this now this was I think this was Silence of the Hams wasn't it oh was it Spy Hard oh was that I'm so sorry I'm so sorry Spy Hard I'm mixing them up Silence of the Hams who were the other people in Silence of the Hams you know Gilbert I don't remember it was it was that Leslie Nielsen or No, no. Leslie Nielsen was in Spy Hard. Silence of the Hams was Dom DeLuise.

Everybody's in Silence of the Hams. Dom DeLuise, okay. I don't have my phone. I never saw it. That's one of the ones I've never seen. Yeah. I'll tell you what. Two other podcast guests were in Rosebud Beach Hotel, though, with Eddie.

Chuck McCann and Hank Garrett. Oh, wow. Love both. And also, that's where I met Peter Scolari, my pal, and we did Polar Express together. By the way, he'd be great on your show. He's the nicest guy in the world. I did a pilot with Peter Scolari once. Is that right?

Yeah. We'll track Peter down. You worked with the director Harry Hurwitz on Rosebud Beach Hotel. Okay, I remember Harry. Who was famous for making The Projectionist with Chuck McGann, which you would appreciate being because it's sort of a Keaton. It's sort of a Sherlock Jr.

Right, yeah. It was, who was it? Those guys, the funny boys. Do you remember them? Those two guys that were called the funny boys. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Schmock and Valley? Yeah, that's it.

You're exactly right. Yeah, yeah. I thought you were saying an epithet. I thought you were saying that fucking Valley. Jonathan Schmock? Jonathan Schmock and Valley? Yeah, that's it. You're exactly right. Yeah, yeah. I thought you were saying an epithet. I thought you were saying that fucking Valley. Jonathan Schmock and Valley. Yeah, Jim Valley, right. I don't know what they're doing now, but they were in it. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. And what about Surf 2, where you played Menlo? Surf 2, there was no Surf 1. It was the first movie in history. There was no Surf 1. It was Surf 2. I loved it. That was the first time I ever got top billing in a film, in fact. It was really fun. I loved Surf 2.

A lot of girls in bikinis running around. It was great. Ruth Buzzy and Cleavon Little. Any memories? Yes, Cleavon Little I loved. Nicest guy ever. And Ruth Buzzy, I've done signing shows with Ruth Buzzy. She was a very nice lady.

Yeah, she's in Texas. I heard she married a rich guy. Is that right? She was a rich guy? We were trying to get her on the show. Yeah, I heard she married a rich guy. Is that right? She was a rich guy? We were trying to get her on the show. Yeah, I heard she married a real rich guy. We will return to Gilbert Gottfried's amazing, colossal podcast right after this. That's what you said.

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And he was Fred Olin Ray's cameraman. He's probably, oh, he's passed away. Yeah, he passed away. Yeah, he had a Orson Welles. Yes. And he was Fred Olin Ray's cameraman. Oh, he's passed away. Yeah, he passed away. Yeah, he had a lot of great stories. About Welles. Yeah. About Welles. Yeah, I'm trying to think.

Oh, you know, it's a story on him, believe it or not. He claimed, I don't know if it's true, but he told me Welles gave him his Citizen Kane Oscar. I'm not kidding you. As a gift. I go, you're kidding. Yeah. Wow. For some reason, reason for whatever a token

of admiration or maybe he couldn't pay him but he gave him that thing and he claimed he had it yeah okay I'm just gonna fly through credits Eddie because this is fun sure what about a movie called Delta Pi with Ruth Gordon oh yeah I couldn't understand her Ruth Gordon I said but I couldn't understand what she was saying so we do a scene scene. With a scene, we're ready. Okay, action. Then she goes, and we'll take him. And we'll walk down the street. And I just realized, whenever she stops talking, say your line. I couldn't understand a word she said.

I go, yes, ma'am. I walked down the street. And then you take him over there and you go. Yeah, that's right. I took this lady down and we walked down the street. Yeah, I walked down the street. That's all I did. I could not understand what she was saying nicest lady very nice but i could understand her

she was really old she didn't scare the shit out of you like like andy griffith did that's right yeah yeah andy was scary it's so funny that christopher lee is a a nice pleasant guy and andy griffith is a fucking scumbag. You know what? You're right. I don't think he went that far. The irony of life. You're right.

It's one of the ironies. You're right. I've never heard anybody say anything disparaging about Andy Griffith, so we've made news. But now I'll be repeating it constantly. What about, here's another one. When we talked about the Whoopie Boys with Denim Elliot,

we have to bring this up, Eddie, because this is a movie that's come up on the show and Gilbert and I love it for all the wrong reasons and that's Million Dollar Mystery. Oh, yes.

Oh, yeah, Million Dollar Mystery. Yeah, yeah. Because we had Rick Overton here. Okay, Rick was, I loved Rick. The best. They got all these, Gilbert, you should have been in that

when they had all these comedians in it And they got us together and they tried to do Mad Mad World Again, and for me it didn't fly But it was alright Mac and Jamie were in it Mac and Jamie were in it, yeah And the great Kevin Pollak That was his first film

And wasn't that All produced by Gladbags It was the Gladbags movie. Yeah. That was the first movie ever they gave away a million dollars. Audrey, because if you solved where the treasure was, you'd win a million dollars. And I think the whole movie made $900,000. They didn't even win their million back.

Some lady won it and they had to pay a million dollars. They lost money. I think it was some girl. I think some young girl won it. Was it a young girl? I think so was some girl. I think some young girl won it. Was it a young girl? Okay. I think so. Yeah, and I remember the poster had a big glad bag filled with money. Yeah. So you knew this was a complete commercial. Produced, of course, by the larger than life Dino De Laurentiis.

Oh, my God. He was the godfather. It was like meeting the godfather. We're all in a room. Eddie Gwynn, Mr. De Laurentiis. Oh my God. He was the godfather. It was like meeting the godfather. We're all in a room. Eddie Gwynn, Mr. De Laurentiis wants to meet. So you go in, it's this gigantic huge room. He's sitting behind a desk. It was like meeting Brando as the god.

Yes, sir. You want to be in our film, huh? Yeah, yes, sir. I'd like to be. Oh, you want to do it? So he had that kind of an aura. He wasn't a bad guy, but he was like the godfather. And I felt like I was talking to the godfather.

I think of Belushi doing Dino De Laurentiis on Saturday Night Live. Nobody cry for Godzilla. They cry for my tongue. My tongue. Remember that? Yeah. Oh, sure. Remember that?

Yeah. Oh, sure. And in 1941, you worked with the great Murray Hamilton. Yes. Murray and I were up on the Ferris wheel together, and I loved Murray. We were so great. He couldn't breathe. He was a lifelong smoker.

Yeah. So Stephen would put us up there, and like every half hour, he'd have to bring us down, Stephen had an oxygen tank and Murray would and he'd take in oxygen then we'd go back up on the Ferris wheel. Yeah. Terrific actor, by the way. And you're a Twilight Zone guy. You know he's in that Yes.

Ed Wynn. With Ed Wynn, that wonderful episode. That was the first episode. Yeah, the first one. Yeah, he plays Death. Yes, exactly. Also The Hustler, which I just got the collector's edition.

One of my favorite movies, yeah. Yeah. An underrated actor. Yes, it was. And you guys are funny together. I mean, I never think of Murray Hamilton in a comedy. I think of him in Jaws. I think of him in that Twilight Zone episode.

He's kind of, in Jaws, he's kind of so campy. It's almost funny. He's such a campy character. But I see what you're saying. Now, here's a crazy showbiz. Oh, I remember in The Hustler, one of my favorite lines is Paul Newman says to Murray Hamilton, who's like the southern card shark, Paul Newman says, well, you know, I win sometimes. And Murray Hamilton goes, oh, I bet you do.

Isn't he in a barber, oh, I bet you do. Isn't he in Harper, too? I think so. Didn't he show up in Harper? Terrific guy. He's in a bunch of those. Maybe he did. Maybe he did. He might have stayed friends with Paul Newman and they put him in.

Now, I heard this, and I'm wondering if this is bullshit. When I do deep research on guests like you, I find these strange things. Did you ever hear this, that Zemeckis and Gale and Spielberg first approached Jackie Gleason and Art Carney? Yes, absolutely true. And get this too, not only that, John Wayne. They asked John Wayne, Stephen asked John Wayne to play

Stilwell. Exactly, but he thought it was un-American. He goes, don't do this film, it's un-American, this is World War II, you know, so he didn't do it. But yeah, Jackie Gleason and Art Carney, yeah. Jackie Gleason and Art Carney were supposed to play the two guys on the Ferris wheel? Right. I don't know what happened, but yeah, that's the story.

It's true. What I heard is that, and I can't, I guess this is true, but I heard that Gleason was feuding with Carney at the time and said, I won't work with him. Is that right? They wound up reuniting again not long after to make a movie called Izzy and Moe. Izzy and Moe, right.

I remember that. Yeah, but there's an interview with Bob Gale somewhere, and he says they approached Gleason and Carney, and it was a no-go, and it winds up becoming you and Murray Hamilton. That's interesting. Interesting, yeah. I guess Art Carney would be the guy with the dummy like me, and Gleason would have been, yeah, the guy getting upset.

Yeah. And you were not the voice of the dummy. No, it was a nice guy called, um, I forget the guy's name, but Oh, Jerry, Jerry, Jerry something was the voice of them. They tried my voice, but Steven didn't like the way it worked. My big story on that, by the way, is I threw up in Steven Spielberg's toilet. This is my big, one of my great honors. Even every day we're on the Ferris wheel and Steven would whip us around and then this one day he was really there's a scene where the ferris wheel goes off the pier so steven was whipping us around really fast and i have bad motion sickness and i started feeling woozy steven

lets me off the wheel and he had he goes let my secretary take you to my dressing room so i'm kind of shaky and woozy and she takes me to his dressing room i'm laying there on steven spielberg's cot so i'm starting to feel sick i go go into the bathroom. I heave up. I go, I just threw up in Steven Spielberg's toilet. It's one of the honors of my career. I love it. How did you get in that movie in the first place, Ed? It's you, Nancy Allen, and

Wendy Jo. Wendy Jo and Bobby DiCicco, all from I Want to Hold Your Hand. You're all in I Want to Hold Your Hand. We were kind of hoping that you have this great little company. But because both films didn't do good at the box office, it kind of ended there. I see. Yeah.

Now, aside from it being nauseating to be spun around, wasn't it scary? You know, I didn't mind that so much, Gilbert. I was I don't remember being scared, but I did get sick. Just the that one day was the only time I ever got sick. But no, I like the Ferris wheel. I thought it was fun. So you didn't have to audition. They carried the four of you over because you would work with Zemeckis and Gale on I

Want to Hold Your Hand. And they said they said there's a beginning of a group here with chemistry. We were hoping for that. Yeah, we were anyway. But yeah, and I think they pretty much wrote the characters for us. What bob zemeckis you know so yeah yeah yeah what about lionel stander who's in those scenes with you and murray lionel i met only one day i didn't know him that way he seemed like a good guy but i i only met him once we had the one scene i think where i do do not touch and i or do not pull the lever or something that was the only time i saw him right right right he was

famously blacklisted lion Lionel Stander. Oh, I didn't know that. In the Red Scare. I didn't know that. Yeah, he was a victim of the Red Scare. You know, we've talked about that movie on this show. Gil, we did an episode about 1941. Oh, yes.

You know, and it's an uneven movie, obviously. But there's, and I guess it's one of those movies that the expectations for it with that cast and Spielberg was so high that people were bound to be disappointed. But there's so much to love about it. It was an interesting cast. Yeah, I'm not crazy about it myself, but I meet a lot of people who like it. To me, I went to the premiere. Mrs. Spielberg thought I was going to kill myself. I walked out in a daze.

I go, you get in a film with Spielberg, you were John Belushi. And I thought this is once in a lifetime, you know, and I saw the premiere and I knew it would tank. I saw it and I go, I just, for me, Frank, it wasn't funny. I got maybe when we went to the premiere, it was, it was like a ghost town. It was like one of those things with a tumbleweed. Dan Aykroyd was there and you could hear his hollow laughter. It was just Dan Aykroyd.

And Dan Aykroyd was the only one laughing. Oh, man. Steven wasn't there. Steven wasn't at the premiere. Ron Howard, I remember, was there. And it was just, it was a dead premiere. And I walked home and I was just in a daze. I go, this is going to tank so bad.

Yeah. And you probably, when you were in a Spielberg movie, you thought, I better be making my Academy speech exactly exactly gilbert you thought this is in the bag i got steven spielberg belushi was the hottest comedian in the business this is a sure thing you know how can i and then it you know it now it did make its money back it wasn't as big a financial bomb as they thought but you know it got savaged it was the most savage comedy ever i have to say though it's filled with great performances. I mean, you and Murray are wonderful. Stack is great. Well, that's very kind of you.

As General Stilwell. Slim Pickens is funny. Yeah, yeah. I mean, there's some moments, I guess. There are really isolated, very, very good isolated moments in it. You know, to be honest, I'd have to see it again. Yeah. I think you should.

And Warren Oates is great. Okay, okay. You did a movie called Mob Boss. Yes, Morgan Fairchild. Yeah. And you said you had quite a good time with Morgan Fairchild. That was a great one. She asked me the easiest question of all time.

I have to make out. And Morgan Fairchild, it's the gag. You know the old classic gag, Gilbert? The sexy girl kisses the nerd and she moves and his glasses are steamed up. She moves and it's a sight gag. So we're going to do that scene. Morgan Fairchild turns me. She goes, you want to rehearse?

I'm looking. I do my Oliver Hardy. Look at the camera. Happy. You know, you think, you know, so we're rehearsing. I'm making out with Morgan Fairchild. She's a great kisser. Was the happiest moment of my life.

And we just we made out a lot. And then we did. And she was wonderful. She was a great straight woman. Great comedian. Yeah. So she rehearsed making out with you. Yep. She was wonderful. She was a great straight woman, great comedian. So she rehearsed Making Out With You.

Yep, yep. Wow. One of my great moments. Did you have any travel skills? Yeah, but I never had that kind of luck. Right. That was lucky.

I should have paid them. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let me just ask you a couple of more things about 1941. Sure. Eddie, before I jump off of it. how much was John Milius around?

Was he on the set? John was around a little bit. I don't remember. I have a lot of memories of him. Not necessarily a lot. No, but at least I saw. Yeah. Interesting. I read to this Kubrick suggested to Spielberg that he do it as a drama. And you ever heard that? No, I never heard that one, really. Yeah. Oh, my God. That's too weird.

I find that interesting. With John Belushi and Dan Aykroyd? That's amazing. No, it's just, I guess, the story. Oh, before they cast him. The story of the L.A. panic. Okay, I see. I could see that.

Yeah, that I could see. But, you know, Gilbert, we love character actors on this show. Slim Pickens, Warren Oates, Dick Miller's in it. Oh, wow. Elisha Cooke is in it. Dub Taylor. Lionel Stander. Even Sam Fuller shows up. Candy

is in there. John Candy. Joe Flaherty. Penny Marshall shows up. Patty LeCone. One of the extras was Mickey Rourke. Mickey Rourke is in there. One of the great cast. And they used I think Spielberg used the same girl who was killed at the beginning of Jaws. Yes, my last signing show.

My last signing show I just did with that girl. She's a doll. Susan Backlini, is that her name? Something like that, yeah. Susan Back, it's some kind of a weird last name, yeah. Backbiter or something like that. Which is ironic for Jaws, isn't it? Do you have any Belushi stories, Eddie?

I know you guys had lunch one day. I love the guy. I met him. He was at the I Want to Hold Your Hand premiere. John was there and we were at the party afterwards. And he was just sitting alone and I sat down on a bench and we chatted. And he was the nicest guy. Totally straight.

You know, Gilbert, you know, some comedians are always on doing their thing and some comedians are very serious people. And John was one of those serious, we just talked about stuff, da-da-da-da. We talked philosophy and all this stuff for like a half hour and that was where I met him. Anyway, we did 1941 and one day I'm sitting there, I'm a 22-year-old Schmendrick, you know, on the set.

Steven Spielberg turns to me, Eddie, you wanna go to lunch with us? What, you wanna go to lunch with us? Okay, it's him, Belushi and Dan Aykroyd. I'm a 22-year-old kid, you know, on the set. Steven Spielberg turns to me, Eddie, you want to go to lunch with us? What? You want to go to lunch with us? Okay. It's him, Belushi, and Dan Aykroyd. I'm a 22-year-old kid, you know? So we go to the commissary of the studio. I didn't say one word. I'm like, I'm sitting there, keep my jaw from dropping, you know? It was so surreal, but they all talked, you know, in kibitz. I saw what it was like. Everybody kept approaching Steven, I remember. Mr. Spielberg, I did this sketch of you. Mr. Spielberg, Steve and I remember, Mr. Spielberg, I did this sketch of you. Mr. Spielberg, can you sign this?

Mr. Spielberg, I have this script. And everybody kept coming up to see. There's nobody to protect them. And I just saw what it must be like to be Steven Spielberg. I'm sure he's more insulated now. But we did the whole lunch. Then I realized I didn't have a wallet. I didn't have any money.

I was, oh my God, I ate my lunch. But luckily, Steven picked up the tab. So I didn't get to be embarrassed. It's interesting that he was that big a deal and he really only made two films. Well, Sugar Land Express, but really Jaws and Close Encounters. Yeah, but remember the effect they had at that time. It's kind of like Travolta, remember?

He only did Saturday Night Fever in Greece, but remember the tremendous effect of them. Yeah. I wonder if this is bullshit, the kind of stuff I find. But I found that Kubrick suggested he do it as a drama and I found that Spielberg kicked around the idea of doing it as a musical. Had you heard that? No, I never did. That's the interesting thing. I hope this

is true. I think some of this came from Bob Gale or from a commentary. Eddie, just to indulge me, will you say trapped like beavers? I'm trying to think how I said that line. Oh, yeah, that's right. Trapped like beavers.

I remember that. Yeah, I remember that. I'm kind of scared. Yeah, yeah. You made me happy. You like John Travolta a lot. I love John Travolta. Such a wonderful guy.

And we did Grease. I love John Travolta. Such a wonderful guy. We did Grease. I had my little role. My first scene is I come up the stairs and the T-Birds mess up my hair and I'm the guy that gets picked on. After every take, John, are you okay, buddy? He called me buddy. You okay, buddy? He'd always come up. Are you alright, buddy? Yeah, it's okay, Mr. Travolta.

I think I called him John or whatever, but he always called me buddy. One day, my most surreal memory, I came on the set. I had a chocolate ice cream cone. I'm a little 20-year-old idiot. I'm licking my ice cream cone. I look over. John Travolta is there. There were like this mob around him.

It was like Elvis was there. I swear, girls, cheerleaders, everybody was around. Somehow he spotted me. I swear to God this is true. He sees me all alone. He comes over. How are you, buddy? He shakes my hand.

This is so frigging surreal. But he shakes my hand. This is so friggin' surreal. But he shakes my hand. He made sure I was okay. Then he goes back and he's surrounded by all these people. But somehow he saw me. That's the John Travolta, the essence of what kind of a person he is. Yeah. I worked with him once, too.

And you danced with him. Oh, yes. On screen. Is that right? In what, Gilbert? I dance with John Travolta. And look who's talking, too. Oh, is that right?

Okay, I'm sure I saw that. He must have gotten a kick out of you. I guess so. He was nice. Yeah, very nice guy. And Dave Thomas auditioned you for The Experts. Yes. Which was John and Kelly Preston.

And I met the actor who got the part, and he said he envied me for not getting that part yeah the movie did tank yeah yeah it's true Gilbert what was Eddie Murphy like I just saw you in Beverly Hills Cop 2 oh he he was a lot of fun was he nice guy yeah we had known each other from Saturday Night Live. Okay. And that whole scene, we improvised. Is that right? We did it different each time and just had fun and laughed the whole time. Oh, wonderful. Yeah, I love that scene. And I remember being invited to his bachelor party.

Oh, yeah? Really? Yeah, it was up in his house in Jersey. And I remember thinking, oh, this is going to be one of those Hollywood Babylon stories. Where like, and no one ever knew

who killed that woman. Like Virginia Raff in the Coke bottle? Right, yeah, yeah. See, Eddie gets all our references. Oh, yeah, sure. Eddie, you're so perfect like Virginia Raff in the Coke bottle right yeah yeah see Eddie gets all our references oh yeah sure Eddie you're so perfect for this podcast

you have to listen to it or like that William Randolph Hirsch yacht ride oh the Pogdanovich movie yeah yeah the cat's meow

yeah with Charlie Chaplin Chaplin supposedly Chaplin was on there Thomas Ince Thomas Ince yeah there, yeah. Thomas Ince. Thomas Ince. Yeah, Thomas Ince, right. Thomas Ince, yeah.

I thought you were going to say, what's his name? Who was the horror guy that was doing the autoerotic asphyxiation? Do you remember this? It came up on a previous show. Oh. The guy that was found under the Cyclops. The guy that was found under. Oh, my God.

Albert Decker. Albert Decker. Oh, yes. Yeah. He did a great Twilight Zone. Naked, hanging from a noose in the bathroom. That's the guy I'm thinking of. Covered with pornography.

Right. And bound and gagged. And it was deemed a suicide. Yeah. I wonder about that one. I remember. Remember how great he was in the Twilight Zone Remember the one where he comes back

Comes back to the present He's a cowboy Remember that episode That was him I think so I remember him with Julie Newmar in one Oh where he's the devil Yes

Yeah I remember that Yeah Yeah That's a great episode What was your favorite Twilight Zone When I was a kid I loved It was the only – I'm one of these because everybody else loves them. But I never got into Jonathan Winters. But I loved his Twilight Zone.

I thought he was a magnificent actor. And I liked him in Mad, Mad World. He was like Minnesota Fats. Minnesota Fats. Fats Brown. Yeah, I loved that episode. With Jack Klugman. Jack Klugman's in that one.

Yes, I loved that episode. Which made it one of two Jack Klugman episodes. Yeah. Jack Klugman did Jack Klugman is in that one. Yes, I love that episode. Which made it one of two Jack Klugman episodes. Yeah, Jack Klugman did Pip, his son. Remember, he goes to his son's work. Yes, in memory of Pip or something. Yes, yeah, yeah. Or in praise of Pip. In praise of Pip, you know yourself.

Another of our podcast guests, Billy Mummey. Billy Mummey. Oh, yeah. We had him here. Isn't the Klugman one called Young Man with a Horn? Yes, he did three years. Doesn't he hide a horn in the pawn shop? Yes, that's another one.

He's the horn guy, right. So he's the third one. Third one, wow. With Klugman. Yeah. But before, our listeners are going to say we never heard the Eddie Murphy story. You were expecting degradation. Yes, and nothing.

It was like some food there. No strippers. I remember Bill Murray was there and Chris Rock. And boy, I thought that was going to be one of those true Hollywood stories. Big letdown. I'm surprised not necessarily debauchery, but I'm surprised they didn't at least have a stripper, just a regular stripper. Yeah, not even a stripper.

No kidding. Nothing. That's amazing. And I thought this would be like, you know how it was suggested that, what's her name, the gossip columnist for William Randolph Hearst. Oh, Luella Parsons? Maybe Luella Parsons allegedly got a lifetime contract basically to keep her mouth shut.

I've heard that. Oh, is that right? Yeah. Over what? There was a murder of this director, Thomas Ince. Right, right, okay. Yeah, Bogdanovich made a decent movie about it with Thomas Ince. Right, right. Okay. Yeah, Bogdanovich made a decent movie about it with Eddie Izzard as Chaplin.

Playing Chaplin, yeah. I remember that. And there was a song where they say, and handsome Thomas Ince walked around just like a prince. Wow. Very interesting. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So tell us, you worked with Zemeckis

and Gale in 1941, but how did you, but obviously before that, I want to hold your hand. How did you meet those guys? I met, I went in an audition. I want to hold your hand was the most day ever audition. I had nine auditions for that one and we just hit it off sometimes in people. And sometimes it works the reverse, but sometimes you go in and it's like life. You go in and audition and sometimes you just hit it off with the people. And Zemeckis and Gale I loved and we just became immediate pals. Bob Gale was literally crying. It's the only time I ever made a guy cry from laughter. But I was auditioning

with some girl and I looked over and he was actually crying with laughter. We just loved each other. I just watched it again, Eddie. You're very funny in that movie and you're very physical in that movie. Yeah. I mean, you try to jump out the window at one point. Yeah. When the hotel cops, Dick Miller. Yeah, I mean, you try to jump out the window at one point. Yeah. When the hotel cops, Dick Miller. Yeah, that was Dick Miller.

Dick Miller, two podcast guests interacting. Yeah, yeah. Now, have you ever met any of the Beatles? I did. I touched Paul McCartney. You did the Tonight Show. That counts. I don't know if I want to hear the rest of it.

Gilbert had a brisket with Stu Sutcliffe. Oh, seriously? Oh, you did not. Okay, that one I know is not. I did get this. I did a signing show with Pete Best. We were together for three days. We sat side by side.

He loved I Want to Hold Your Hand. What kind of guy is he? This is what I saw, Frank, and I swear to God, I solved it. What's the biggest Beatles question ever? They go, why did the Beatles fire Pete Best? That's the eternal question. And you know what happened? I saw this guy for three days and I knew what it was.

He's the nicest guy in the world. He's super nice guy, but he doesn't have that wicked sense of humor. The Beatles had this funny sense of humor, all four of them, mostly Lennon, but Pete Best was just the straightest guy. And also he didn't have that little bit of needling, that kind of little bit of cruelty the Beatles had.

They just had this little edge to him. How interesting. Yeah, he was like, and I go, he didn't fit in. I go, I can totally see those years, 60 to 62. This guy was with him for two years. And it's one of those group things where he did not fit in the group. And then Ringo came in and he could just see it was the perfect puzzle fit. Because you hear so many different stories

about why it didn't work out with him. I'm telling you. He was supposedly getting the girls and John Paul Ramsey. He wasn't a good drummer. Yeah, they said he was the biggest star. Yeah, he was like, the women liked him.

But I'm telling you, from what I saw, it was one, you know, we've all been in these groups in your life where you go in and you just don't fit in with a group. And I saw it in Pete.

They go, Eddie Deason, this is Pete Best. And there were some kind of the reporters were setting it up for schtick. They go, Pete, this is the great Eddie Deason or something. And he goes, hello, Eddie. It was totally straight. And I go, John Lennon would have made some kind of a joke. Ringo would have made some kind of a wisecracker, done some kind of schtick. But he didn't do any schtick jokes all weekend.

And I'll give you the ultimate Pete Best question. I go up to him. I got to ask, and I go, Pete, I go, why did you never comb your hair long in the Beatles cut? And he goes, nobody ever asked me. Wow. It's so simple. And I go, that's Pete Best.

That's just who the guy is. He's a very simple guy, a regular guy who played two years with the Beatles. That's who he is. Interesting. Yeah. That's a very simple guy, a regular guy who played two years with the Beatles. That's who he is. Interesting. Yeah. That's an interesting take. I wonder if he'd be good for this show, Gilbert. Yeah. Oh, God. Yeah. Is he a talker? Is he

expressive, Eddie? You can bring it. He's a rather shy guy. You know what I saw, Frank, all weekend? I signed with him for three days, eight hours a day. Every single person. Pete, I feel so bad for you. Pete, I'm so sorry. Oh, God.

He's been hearing that for 50 years. That's what I said. I said, Pete, you've been hearing this for 40 years. And he just nods. I go, you must have heard everything for 40 years. And he just nodded his head. That's what everybody says to the guy. My understanding of him was that he'd made peace with it years ago.

And he was a well-adjusted fellow. Probably. Well, remember, from the Beatles anthology, he is a millionaire millionaire so he at least got a payoff out of it yeah that's something yeah yeah so he did make money Pete yeah the anthology they played they had Pete best songs and he is a millionaire now so at least that part not bad uh by the way speaking of I want to hold your hand and Eddie uh is co-starring with our pal dick miller but will jordan's in there as well oh the great yeah playing ed sullivan jordan yeah yeah yeah we had we had him here you are so funny in that movie playing ringo klaus oh thank you and you swing on a microphone from the rafters at one point you try to jump out a window my hands they taped up my hands we did so

many swings in that scene that my hands were bloody and cut. So they put tape on my hands and I had to keep swinging, I remember. Will Jordan, you know what I asked Will Jordan? I'm sorry. You know what I asked Will Jordan, by the way? We were sitting together in makeup and I asked him what I always want. I said, was there something physically wrong with Ed Sullivan? Was he, did he have a sickness? And he said, you know what?

That's the question I get asked the most. And he goes, as far as I know, he didn't. There was just some, he was just, here they are, you know, this weird skeleton guy, you know. But I thought, was there a physical thing? Was there a disease he had? You know what? I had never heard any rumors about it. Just that he was like basically talentless.

Yeah. Yeah. And totally had no performance skill, Watson. Right. And wielded his power as a weapon. Yes. I heard he was a scumbag. I didn't know that.

Yeah. Oh, is that right? I didn't know that. Yeah. You know, when Will Jordan was in this very room, he's 90 now. Right. When you guys made that movie in 78? Right.

77, 78? 77. 77, 78? 77. He really looks like Ed Sullivan. Yeah, he does. I mean, it's a masterful makeup job. Yes. And they're shooting him from a distance. But you have to see it.

I mean, he is the embodiment of Ed Sullivan in that picture. Yeah, absolutely. He's a dead ringer. And he was in about 10 movies, Will Jordan. Always as Ed Sullivan? He's Ed Sullivan. Is that right? He's playing Danny Rose.

He's playing Will Jordan. It's a funny movie, Eddie. It's an underrated movie. You're funny. Wendy Jo is funny. Oh, thank you. It's got a lot of energy. Yeah, that was a great film.

They saw it. Three of them saw it. Oh, get this. Paul McCartney did me. He did me. He literally, he was being interviewed for a beatles magazine i had an old friend joe pope and he sadly he later died of aids but he was a wonderful guy but he had a magazine called strawberry fields forever and he said he goes

did you ever see the movie i want to hold your hand he asked paul mccartney and mccartney goes and the answer come back he did my shtick he goes and the answer come back and the answer come back and i go Paul McCartney freaking did me yeah I was going to ask you that if any of the Beatles had had any reaction to that movie because I was digging around online looking for that but obviously Paul sees everything yeah this is what I heard Frank I heard one report there was like a little blurb and Ryan they go Paul and Ringo saw a screening and they both liked it but then I heard an interview with Ringo and he goes I can't believe Spielberg got involved with the garbage film.

He didn't like it. So I don't know which story is true. Interesting. Yeah. Yeah. Interesting. And you like Tom Hanks a lot. I love Tom Hanks.

Nicest guy ever. I didn't know he was in Polar Express. Okay. I auditioned and I came to the set the first day and they go, Eddie, we're going to show you, we're going to do this thing called motion capture. And they show me a little screen of it, a little acting of it. And I heard it was Tom Hanks voice. I go, no, it couldn't be.

Nobody had told me Tom Hanks was starring in it. So I get in all of the cast and crew. There's like 100 people in the room. Tom Hanks is in this. So one of the producers goes, just relax. He's like a big, overgrown kid. OK okay so tom hanks comes bouncing in the room he comes to me out of everybody's coming up hi eddie i'm tom you know no shit sherlock you know yes sir the nicest guy ever all through the shoot i gotta tell you the greatest story ever we were we did some reshoots retakes of uh polar express we were doing some pickup shots at the end it was the day captain kangaroo died bob keishon you know captain kangaroo be all sure tom and i love captain kangaroo we both we were sitting in makeup together we were both commiserating i can't believe

captain kangaroos that we were reminiscing how we love captain kangaroo and i was real sad you know captain kangaroos dead you know so i get out of the makeup room i'm down there coming it was a bright sunny day tom hanks comes out the door it It was just me and Tom, nobody else. I'm looking up into the sun at Tom Hanks. He sings me the Tom terrific song. He didn't say anything. He just say, I'm Tom terrific. And this is my dog. He sings. However that song goes, he sang me the whole Tom terrific song. I almost wept, you know, my own little concert of Tom Hanks. I was spelled, but I go, all I could think of, I go, you know what?'s singing me this song. My own little concert of Tom Hanks. I was spellbound. I go, all I could think of, I go, you know what? You're a great guy.

I go, you're a fucking great guy. And he just smiled and he went off. That was my best Tom Hanks moment. He's one of those guys. You hear stories like that. Yeah. John Amos. Do you know John Amos?

Remember John Amos from Good Times? Absolutely, yeah. John Amos was here and he told us he went backstage to see Tom to congratulate him after he did a Broadway. He was some in a Broadway play. And he walked backstage and Tom started singing a McDonald's jingle from a commercial that John Amos was in with Anson Williams. Oh, my God. And it made John so happy. I think he's one of those guys that just.

He's that kind of a guy. He had the Santa Claus suit on. OK, and Polar Express. He was around the set. They had a hammock for him. He was laying there. And I go,. He had the Santa Claus suit on, okay, in Polar Express. He was around the set. They had a hammock for him, and he was laying there. And I go, this guy is freaking Santa Claus. If there was ever a Santa Claus in real life, this guy is the embodiment of Santa Claus. That's Tom Hanks.

Anyway, we finish Polar Express the last day. Eddie, I hear you're a baseball fan. Yeah, I am. He goes, I have box seats at Dodger Stadium. Would you like to come to a couple games? You're fucking kidding. Do you want to have sex with Marilyn Monroe? Yeah, you think, you know.

So anyway, you know, he takes me to three Dodger games. Oh, that's great. I had a friend named Tommy, okay? He was dying of Lou Gehrig's disease. I thought he'd get a kick out of it. His body was progressively getting worse. It was atrophying, and he ended up twisted and gnarled. He eventually, he suffocated, you know.

It was a horrible death. But anyway, I took him to the first game with Tom Hanks. I will never forget the sight of Tom. And Tommy could hardly talk and he couldn't understand him. He'd go, take me to the game. And I'll never forget looking down and Tom was listening carefully to what he was saying and nodding. And he'd go, I missed a Hanks.

And then Tom signed the baseball for him. You could barely understand time. But that was what I remember about Tom Hanks, and then Tom signed the baseball for him. You could barely understand time, but that was what I remember about Tom Hanks, just him really intently listening to this poor guy. Tom didn't know he was going to die or anything, but Tom just nodded and listened, and he made it special for Tommy. Another mensch. Nice to hear.

No Andy Griffith. No scumbag Andy Griffith. Right. I was glad to see, too, and I found this in my research, speaking of Hanks, that you're also a fan, as Gilbert and I are, of that thing you do. Yes, I love that movie. That's a great movie. Us, too. Yeah.

I see the guys around, but it's one of those where they all peak. It's kind of like, okay, the big version is The Wizard of Oz, except for Judy Garland. Every one of these guys peak. They never came close to those great roles. They were so perfect. And that's one of those films. The mean guy, I never saw him in anything great. And the funny guy was never in anything as great as that.

They all kind of just were. That was a great movie. Terrific movie. Terrific ensemble. And Tom directed that. Yes, he did. Yes, he did. He's very good in it.

Gilbert, we've talked about that movie. Oh, yeah. I love that film. I got a couple of Beatle questions for you, Eddie. Sure, absolutely. You, he did. He's very good in it. Gilbert, we've talked about that movie. Oh, yeah. I love that film. I got a couple of Beatle questions for you, Eddie. Sure, absolutely. You're the expert. First of all, did that movie make you more excited about the Beatles, or were you a Beatles guy from the get-go?

You know what it is, Frank? It was one of those I played myself. Oh, you did? I'm a Beatles freak. You were a fan from a kid. I'm a Beatles nut. Yes. I love the Beatles. I remember watching them on the Ed Sullivan show.

I remember seeing Hard Day's Night and helping the theaters. I always loved them. So I just played myself. Do you like Yellow Submarine? I asked this of Beatles fans, even though it's not the Beatles voices. Yeah. I wish the Beatles did the voice. I wish they did.

But I love the film. Yeah. You do. I wish they'd done more films. They were such great comedians. I know. And after Help, you know, they just'd done more films. They were such great comedians. I know. And after Help, you know, they just stopped.

But they could have been a great comedy team. Yeah, Hard Day's Night's my favorite all-time movie. One of mine, too. They did the pretty terrible Magical Mystery. Yeah, it's a strange one. Yeah. That's not really a narrative so much as it's like a disconnected series of music videos. Yeah, you watch the great videos, right? And then in the between it's like they were these stone guys george said it was the most expensive home movie ever it's like these four guys just making a big

home movie that's what it looks like did you see across the universe did you like it no i never did never saw that frank you should see it is it good worth seeing yeah worth seeing ambitious it's you know it's got the music. Okay. Which is hard to dislike. Do you remember the Beatles cartoon series? Oh, the Saturday morning. Absolutely, yeah. Absolutely.

I used to love it, yeah. And the voices were so off in that. Oh. They didn't sound anything. John was like this distinguished guy, like a Noel Coward guy, and the voices didn't fit him at all. Yeah, it was like one of them sounded like Ronald Coleman. Right.

Like anything vaguely British was good enough. By the way, Gilbert. Like Laird Krieger. Gilbert, we got to get into your film, how much I loved it, but you do the best John MacGyver ever. I've never heard anybody do John MacGyver. Finally, a guest who appreciates John MacGyver. Oh, thank you.

Oh, my God. That was so good. Yeah. You do a good Tony Curtis, too. That's in my film, Gilbert. Yes. I loved it. Great movie.

Everything in this factory must be run according to schedule. I rather take ship. Perfect. Nailed it. I'm going to send you the Peter Asher episode that we did, too, since you're such a Beatle guy. Oh, please. I'd love it. Yeah, I got to catch up on your show.

See, I've got to be taught how to use it, the see it because I've heard so many great things about it. All my friends love it, but I didn't know how to get it on the computer. I'm so stupid. You're kind. Well, I'll send you some links. We had Billy J. Kramer here, too, since you're such a British. Oh, my God. Yes.

Yeah. John Lennon gave him the J, you know. That's right. John Lennon put the J in. Yeah, that's right. He gave him a hit song, too. That's right. Yeah.

And what is your opinion of Night at the Opera? It's not my favorite, too. That's right, yeah. And what is your opinion of Night at the Opera? It's not my favorite, Gilbert. Yeah. It's a good film, but the real Marx Brothers connoisseurs like the first five. Of course. That's it. Yeah, Zeppo apparently is worthless, but he gave this great balance. It was Zeppo and Groucho and Harpo and Chico, and there was this perfect balance he gave.

And when he left, there was something missing. It's one of these great enigmas. And Night at the Opera. Yes. Night at the Opera, it looked like the Marx Brothers were put on a leash. Yeah, yeah. Well, you know what happened, Gilbert? They did it, and then Thalberg took over, and women didn't like the Marx Brothers.

So they go, we got to be more appealing to women. So they put in the musical numbers. They put in the romance, you know, stuff like that. And Alan Jones, yeah. Alan Jones, yeah. He was the Zeppo. Yeah, I prefer Zeppo. Zeppo with a big...

Yeah. Yeah, me too. But that's what it is. Yeah, they got watered down. Yeah. We see the... Remember with the Marx Brothers, they didn't get in until they were in their 40s.

We didn't see all this great stuff they did on Broadway. Of course. None of that's ever recorded. We probably missed the real heyday where they were really wild and going crazy. You remember the old 60s saying don't trust anyone under 30? Oh, yeah. I say don't trust anyone who prefers the MGM films. Yeah, very good.

Very astute. You're right. You're very astute. I always thought Night at the Opera was the beginning of the end. Yes, you're so right. Very good call. Did you once play Harpo's harp, Eddie? Yes, I did.

We saw a Harpo one-man show. The guy's name was Les something, Les Marsden or something. But we went into his dressing room after the show. He was our friend. And we said, you know, great show. And he had Harpo's harp in there. Can I please? Sure, go ahead. And I played Harpo's harp. One of my great moments. I got to throw had Harpo's harp in there. Can I please let it? I sure go ahead.

And I played Harpo's harp. I got one of my great moments. I got pretty cool on Harpo's harp. Yeah. Yeah. Pretty cool. I mean, that's you're talking the genius of geniuses. Harpo Marx, Curly Howard.

You wonder where these guys came from. They were kind of in these groups, but they alone, they were as good as Chaplet or Keaton. At their best, they were as good as any comedians ever. but alone they were as good as Chaplin or Keaton. At their best, they were as good as any comedians ever. And I heard Cary Grant was a big fan of the Stooges. Really? Yeah, particularly Curly.

Is that right? I didn't know that. Well, Eddie's a big Curly guy. Oh, yeah. Curly's my favorite. He makes me laugh more than anybody. You know who else I heard, by the way? Frank Sinatra. It's either Nancy's book one of the daughters wrote.

She said, yes. She said, my dad would come home. He'd turn on the Three Stooges. She said, and I'd hear him laugh like howling. He would just laugh like crazy. So Sinatra was a Three Stooges fan, too. And I heard when Larry Fine was in the home, James Cagney would visit him. Oh, is that right?

Yeah. That's fascinating. I didn't know that. Also good stuff. Gil, you've been holding out on me. You never told me that. I don't like talking to you. I understand that.

Eddie, what do you know about fake Shemp? Fake Shemp? Okay, well, Shemp was under contract. We're obsessed with this now. Yes. You know the story. He did 73 films with the Stooges, and Shemp goes under contract we're obsessed with this now yes he you know the story he did 73 films with the Stooges and Shemp goes to the fights one night he's lighting a cigar and the guy thought he fell asleep his friend Al Winstead Shemp's on his shoulder Shemp had died he just literally conked out most said it happened in 30 seconds it was all over for Shemp whereas Curly

had his stroke Curly lingered for six years but they they said Shemp just ended. So anyway, the Stooges owe him four films. So they put in this stock footage of the Stooges. They put in the old Stooges films. And they had this guy called Joe Palmer come in. And they have the back of him like Shemp. And he goes, you know, going around. They just showed this guy back. Hold your horses, you know, like Shemp.

And they show him jumping around. If you look at it, it's almost unnecessary. But that's what fake Shemp is. It's kind of like, so the audience would understand, like when they would have George going to George Steinbrenner's office in Seinfeld. Right. And the George Steinbrenner guy would be like bouncing from side to side. And if he got up from his chair, he ran out sideways. Right. That was Larry David. That was Larry David, you know. Yeah, of course. Yeah. And they they with with Joe Palmer, that's the way he would run around with the Stooges. Yeah.

They had this stringy hair in the back and it looked like Shemp from the back. Yeah, it was crazy. And then sometimes he would like carry like a bunch of brooms or mops. Yeah, exactly. As a gag to cover his face. Exactly. bunch of brooms or mops yeah as a guy to cover his face exactly and and i heard uh sam ramey the director when he's doing a trick in one of his movies he calls it a a false shimp a fake shimp yeah yeah it's so big nomenclature now yeah love it love it love it you are a stooges expert oh i love the stooges yeah you talk to drew friedman a lot about the stooges on facebook uh honestly no i've seen his

drawings but we've never really i mean i love drew but i've never chatted with him so much you guys i know he loves shemp yeah i know you guys would have a nine hour phone conversation yeah he's a shemp man there's a few people that like Shemp better than Curly. Yes, yes. Yes, fair enough to say. Alex Trebek on Jeopardy is a Shemp fan, and the guy that plays SpongeBob SquarePants, my friend Tom Kenny, prefers Shemp to Curly.

Yeah, there's very few, but some like Shemp better. Now, I also heard that the guy who inherited the Three Stooges fortune was the family of Curly Joe Dorita. Is that right? I didn't know that. Oh, my God. The most unfunny.

We got to check with Steve Cox on that. The most unfunny. Yes. Dude. The most unfunny world. Yeah. He's a world famous comedian. And he never he's never done anything funny in his life.

This guy. He's the least funny world famous comedian because he's a member of the Three funny in his life this guy he's the least funny world famous comedian because he's a member of the Three Stooges Alan Jones was funnier you're right it was like at that point Moe and Larry saw a fat bald guy

and said good enough right the guy had no comedy instincts at all you know how I always say it it went down progressively like an Aristotle equation almost. Curly is to Shemp, as Shemp is to Joe, as Joe is to Curly Joe. They went from this, the greatest comedian ever, to a very funny comedian, to a guy who was occasionally funny every once in a while, to a guy who was never funny at all, the least funny guy that ever lived.

It's the perfect trilogy. Stooge theory according to Eddie Deason. Absolutely. It is. It is. Eddie, I got a couple of quick questions from our listeners. This is called Grill the Guest, and people go to- Now, wait.

Before- Go ahead. Didn't you live next door to a woman who used to appear in Three Stooges? Yeah, Greta Tyson. She just died. Do you know who she was? Sure. store to a woman who used to appear in Three Stooges. Yeah. Greta Tyson. She just, she just died. Yeah. She was sure.

She was with her. She was with Joe Besser. Yeah. She was on the Upper East Side. My wife came home one day and she said, I saw a woman in the street. I don't know her name. I don't know anything about her, but I can tell you by the way she carried herself that she must've been in the movies or she must've been a great actress at one time.

that she must have been in the movies or she must have been a great actress at one time. And so a couple of weeks later, I ran into her. Somebody in the bank knew her name. We had no idea who she was. I was too shy to approach her and said, oh, that's Greta Tyson. She was a stand-in for Marilyn Monroe, too. Is that right? Oh, my God. She did a lot of things, and she worked with the Stooges.

And I never saw her again in the street. She lived on the Upper East Side. She just passed. Yes, she just passed away. And who was that fat girl who worked in about two, three Stooges movies? With Joe Besser? Yes, yeah. Yes, I remember her.

Tiny, they called her Tiny, but I don't remember her real name. Her I don't remember. And I remember she, in her stage act, one of her lines, her slogans was, let's go places and eat things. Okay, that was in Midnight Madness. They must have got Midnight Madness from that. Remember the fat chicks in Midnight Madness?

That was their catchphrase. They must have got thatnight Madness from that. Remember the fat chicks in Midnight Madness? That was their catchphrase. They must have got that from Greta, or from that fat lady, I mean. Here's two questions from fans, Eddie. Laura Pinto, our friend Laura Pinto. Eddie appeared in three movies I absolutely love. Grease, I Want to Hold Your Hand, and Polar Express. What was his favorite experience of the three? Oh, my God.

I guess, even though I have such a little role in greece i'm so negligible in greece but because your first film was such an adventure you know it's so much fun that was probably the most surreal fun i guess greece greece polar express the close second yeah and didn't you get didn't you go to uh isn't there a story about you going to church yeah that's a religious story yeah again if you're a religious person, you take the story as, you know, gospel. And if you're not religious, you just say it's a coincidence. But anyway, I was in Greece. I was Eugene.

So I got the script. I had like four lines. It was a little role. But anyway, they hired me. They, Eddie, you're in Greece. I was celebrating. I told all my friends. I told my family.

They call like the next night as if to kick me in the balls. You know, they cut Eugene out. Eugene's no longer in the movie. You can imagine how I felt, you know. My whole world had been ripped away. So my agent and I were talking. I was about to cry, you know. Let's go to church and light a candle.

What? Go to church and light a candle? Okay. I'd never been in a church in my life. I'm Jewish. So we go in church. So you light a candle? Yeah.

We light a candle. I swear to God. We both lit candles. I think it's still the only time I've ever been in church. But Yeah, we laid a candle. I swear to God, we both lit candles. I think it's still the only time I've ever been in church. But anyway, we go out the next day. They said we Eugene was put back in. You're back in the movie. It's a true story.

It's my only religious story. I love that. Yeah. The power of prayer. Yeah. Yeah. So. So Jesus is still around.

Right. And this is the kind of thing. Yeah. He helped put Eddie back in Greece. Exactly. Right. He wanted Eugene back in. The guy did.

And you, I mean, most of the time in movies, you know, with the crew cut and the voice and mannerisms, was all like a Jerry Lewis. Unequivocally all like a Jerry Lewis. Unequivocally. I worship Jerry Lewis. But never Sammy Petrillo. World to me. Yeah, more compared to Sammy Petrillo. Because my talent level is more Petrillo than Jerry Lewis.

Jerry Lewis is God, you know? But anyway, I met Jerry. I'd seen Jerry Lewis. I saw him in Vegas and I saw him in Damn Yankees. I met him, this was maybe like, I'd say, five years ago. He's signing his CDs. Some CD was what he did, The Jazz Singer. He was there.

So I'm in line. I swear to God, I turned into a 12-year-old kid. I'm standing there rehearsing. Mr. Lewis, I'm your biggest fan. I've seen all your movies. I'm rehearsing over and over. Mr. Lewis, I'm your biggest fan. I've seen all your movies.

I love you. The guy's heard it 20 million times. But the thing is, some celebrities can hear it again, and they'll appreciate it in present time. And some go, oh, fuck you, you know. So anyway, I go to Jerry Lewis. It's my turn. There was like a split second where he did a take. He saw me walking. Now, I never knew.

Did he recognize me? Did he know I was a guy in the movie? Or did he just see this freaky looking guy? Because I walk funny. I have scoliosis and I naturally walk crooked. So he either saw me looking funny or he knew who I was. But there was this split second he saw me. So anyway because I walk funny. I have scoliosis and I naturally walk crooked. So he either saw me looking funny or he knew who I was. But there was this split second he saw me. So anyway, I walk up.

I remembered my lines. Mr. Lewis, I'm your biggest fan. I've seen all your movies. I think you're the greatest comedian in the world. Dead silence. It's like Adolph Eichmann is looking at me. He looked at me with such disdain. I mean, this guy, the guy hated my guts for whatever reason. He looked at me with such disdain. I mean, this guy, the guy hated my guts for whatever reason.

He looked at me with total disdain. He did everything but like sneer at me, you know. But I'm saying, and I started babbling stuff. I was nervous. Mr. Lewis, I think you're great. I loved you in the movies with Dean Martin. I'm saying these stuff. I dropped the names of a couple people that knew him.

I go, I know Jim Neibauer. He's not, dead silence. And then finally he deigned to say, he said, uh, thank you. He said, it was like, it was like a little kid being forced to eat their spinach. That was how he did. He goes, thank you. And then I took the things I was, I go, thanks, Mr. Lewis. So I went down and saw my manager. He goes, what happened? I go, I go, I just met Santa Claus and he kicked me in the balls. That's how I felt. I just, I had never manager. He goes, what happened? I go, I just met Santa Claus and he kicked me in the balls. That's how I felt. I just, I had never been, he goes, you look like you're going to cry.

I almost cried. Yeah. Oh, my God. Adolf Eichmann. That was a bad one. Yeah. Oh, God. I heard he had his mean side, but boy, oh boy.

You heard that, huh? This was just the most hostile thing. If you've ever been a person that just absolutely hated your guts or just had no time for you, and that's how he treated me. Maybe he knew that you were kind of doing a little bit of Jerry. I always would. I'll never know, but it could have been that. It could well have been that.

This is this third-rate guy. I know he hated Sammy Petrillo, so maybe this guy's another Sammy Petrillo, and maybe that's why he hated me. I heard Sammy Petrillo once showed up at one of his shows, and Lewis had him kicked out. Really? What a guy. He hated him that much. Eddie, as we wind down, tell us. I'm going to let you pick. Yes, sir. You want to tell us about Mike Mazurki? Do you want to tell us? Yes. You worked with Stuart Whitman. You worked with Bill Hickey.

I worked with Bill Hickey. In what? In an episode of Wings. Oh, okay. I played as his nephew. Okay. I think I was his nephew too, Gilbert. I played his nephew. Okay. I think I was his nephew too, Gilbert, I think, in Mobbob. I think I was. So we got that

in common. Whatever the best story is among these guys. Also, you told me you had a Mickey Rooney story. I have a Mickey Rooney story. I just wanted to finish John Belushi real quick, just to give him his due. This is just a real quick one. The last time I saw John Belushi, we were kind of pals, and you know, you run into people around town. So I had had a real quick one the last time i saw john belushi we were kind of pals and you know you run into people around town so i had had a real bad audition i came up with just one of those terrible

auditions who's there john belushi's outside hanging around hi how you doing i go john i just had this terrible audition they hated me and he goes they're assholes and he walked off that was the last time i saw him that was last time i saw John Belushi. Mike Mazurky, we did Mob Boss, okay? I was in awe of him, you know? Of course. This is Mike freaking Mazurky. Give me some juice, honey. Come to breakfast.

Got any juice, honey? Or you got some bacon, honey? He talked like that. But anyway, there's one scene in Mob Boss where I have to do a big speech. I did the thing. I read it all. And it was like a solemn speech. It lasts like two minutes.

But we finished it. Mike Mazurky comes over to me. He goes, hey, kid, you did good. And that was the time i talked to mike mizurki so i that one that meant a lot to me i love that was his last film that was mike mizurki's last movie my boss yeah yeah what's what's funnier you emailed me you said you had a couple of fan stories and also the mickey rooney yeah mickey rooney i did four shows with him. I did four signing shows with him. And he was it was two and two. Twice he was the nicest guy ever. And twice he was the meanest little prick. Just the meanest guy. He ran hot and cold. Anyway, one of his nicer shows, I was there and we were talking and I said, Miss, I was just one of those sincere moments ago. Mr. Rooney, I loved you in Boys Town.

And I looked at him and I saw that twinkle in his eye. And I saw that's Mickey Rooney from 1938. And I realized that's the one part of our body that never changes. The rest of our body all gets old, but your eyes never change. You could be 108 years old and your eyes are still the same as when they were 20. And I saw that twinkle in his eye. And that was Mickey Rooney from 1938 with Spencer Tracy. Love it. So why did he turn on you? He just was grouchy.

He was like, he was kind of a curmudgeon. Yeah. And sometimes I'd be there. Ah, leave me alone. Oh, I saw Mickey Rooney come out with Dick Van Dyke one day. They're walking out. This is like the surreal shot of Mickey Rooney and Dick Van Dyke come out from a voiceover session.

And we all went to Dick Van Dyke. Nicest guy ever. Gilbert, I loved your scene in the movie. It was so beautiful. You singing with him. But anyway, he was the nicest guy ever. Gracious. We all shook his hand.

How are you? The most charming guy. Mickey Rooney's there. Let's go see Mickey Rooney now, my friend. I go, no, no. He gives off bad vibes. I could tell there was something. So they all come up and Mickey Rooney.

It's like this corny, crabby neighbor. He goes, get away from me. Get away from me. He shoved them all away, and he just went out. He was just this crabby curmudgeon.

Anyway, Mickey Rooney, I went to the bathroom besides him. We did a signing show together, and he had, he wore these little shorts. He had these plaid shorts on. So Mickey Rooney goes into the men's room,

and I go, I got to go to the bathroom. Mickey Rooney's in the toilet. He's sitting there behind the door, and I see his shorts around his ankles. Mickey Rooney goes into the men's room and I go, I got to go to the bathroom. Mickey Rooney's in the toilet. He's sitting there behind the door and I see his shorts around his ankles. Mickey Rooney's taking a dump. And I went in the next booth and I go, I went to the bathroom beside Mickey Rooney. I went in and I did number one, you know, but I was beside Mickey Rooney. Yeah.

And Mickey Rooney was taking a dump. He was taking a dump. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's a beautiful story. It is. Another tear.

I heard a story about Mickey Rooney that when he'd be on tour doing a play or a show, his big thing was he'd invite everyone to, like, the hallway where they had a pay phone. And he, the whole casting crew, he'd invite over and and he would, like, fuck a girl against the wall or get a blowjob while telling his wife how much he loved her. You're kidding me. Are you serious? That's the story I heard. That sounds like Chico Marx. That sounds like a Chico Marx story.

Oh, yeah. That's interesting. Yeah. That's something Chico would do. Sick individuals. That is hilarious. This takes us naturally into our clothes already. You and I had a nice phone chat

the other night. By the way, this is one of my favorite episodes in a long time, so thank you so much. Oh, so my pleasure. For entertaining. I gotta say, before we end, please let me say something. But you can say yours first. But I have to say something before we end. But do you want me to say mine now? Yeah, sure, if you want.

Gilbert Gottfried, I wish I was there to hug you. You've given me so much laughter and joy in my life. And your wife, you hit such a home run. You know, in life, everybody always strikes out. We're all like Charlie Brown striking out in our life. But with Dara, I just talked to her over the phone and I met her. You hit such a home run with her. And I saw it in your movie. What a lovely lady she is. You're the luckiest guy in the world. And you're such a great comedian. And I just I have to ask you one question, though, Gilbert, that I did. The movie didn't explore it. And I wonder about it.

Who did it for you as a comedian who did who influenced you did you base your character on anybody or is it wholly original yeah never based it on anyone interesting it was weird it was like one of those things when people say where did your persona come from yeah yeah I always kind of think to me because I performed like a trillion times and then one day you wake up and go oh I've been doing it that way a while and so it's kind of like when people ask me that it's like going up to someone in the street and saying you know how when you walk you kind of move your arms a certain way? How did you come up with that?

It's just totally natural. Or the way you sip your coffee cup. How, when, where did you develop? Never thought consciously. He's just an original creature, Eddie. He is. Your movie is so awesome. I just loved it.

Oh, thank you. It's the cliche. You movie is so awesome. I just loved it. Oh, thank you. It's the cliche. You laugh, you cry. There's so many sad, touching, poignant moments in it. And Gilbert is so hilarious. We all know that. I just loved it. But I got to see Dara and how, you know, a lot of people never get that.

See, I've never had that in my life, somebody to come along and save you like that. And I know what it means to have somebody save you like that, and I'm happy for you. Oh, thank you. What a nice thing. One of you appreciates it. Dara. That's beautiful. And the movie's called Gilbert. It's on Hulu. Neil Berkley did a wonderful job.

He did. Please. One of the best documentaries I've ever seen in my life. It really is. Yeah. It really is. Who did it? Who directed? Neil Berkley. I've heard of him. Yeah. It really is. Yeah. It really is. Who did it? Who directed? Neil Berkley. Is he a new? I've heard of him. Yeah. He made a documentary about Wayne White, the Pee Wee's Playhouse designer.

Okay. Dan Harmon. He made one about Dan Harmon. Okay. It's just so beautifully done. Rick and Morty. Yeah. He did a wonderful job capturing this loon sitting next to me.

Absolutely. Absolutely. This strange sociopath. A very uniquey. Yeah, he did a wonderful job capturing this loon sitting next to me. This strange sociopath. A very unique guy, yeah. So, Eddie, tell Gil the story you told me on the phone about the late-night phone call from Spielberg and Zemeckis. Oh, okay, I'll tell you this story. This is the one story that I didn't know if I should put up, but I'll just tell you. We're all old and who cares? We're all adults.

Yeah. Yeah. We were filming I Want to Hold Your Hand in New York, okay? Now, the cool part, we stayed in the Beatles suite. They put us up at the Plaza Hotel. We stayed in the suite. The Beatles stayed in in 64 when they did the Sullivan show. So that was cool.

But anyway, it was one Friday after shooting. It's like one or two in the morning, okay? I get it. You know, you're tired. You've been shooting all day. I get a call one or two in the morning. Bob's a mess. Hi, Eddie. Hiya. Who is this get it. You know, you're tired. You've been shooting all day. I get a call one or two in the morning. Bob's a mix. Hi, Eddie. Hi. Who is this? Bob. Hi. Listen, you got to come to such and such a dress. It's some address in New York, whatever. Bob, I'm tired. Please. I can't be. No, no. You got to see this. You have to come. He goes, you don't have to pay. Come in a cab.

I'll pay for the cab. He's freaking Bob's a mecca. I was a little disgruntled, but okay. So I get dressed. I get in a cab in the middle of the night in New York. I take a cab down. I get in there. It's Plato's retreat. There's this club called Plato's retreat. It's three stories of couples screwing. It's like the Roman orgies.

I'm sitting there with Spielberg and Zemeckis at Plato's retreat. I get my little Coke, you know, watching these couples, you know, it was the most surreal night of my life, but weis at Plato's Retreat. I get my little Coke, you know, watching these couples, you know. It was the most surreal night of my life. But we're at Plato's Retreat. The three of us are there. Me, Spielberg, and Zemeckis.

Totally true story. And we're at Plato's Retreat. It was the most surreal night of my life. Save that one for you, Gil. Yeah. Jesus. Yeah. That's a true story, Gilbert.

Yeah. Yeah. What? Who has a story like that? Eddie Deason. Yeah. I know. Yes your treat I used I never was in there I used to hear about it all the time though I'm sure AIDS killed it off I'm sure this was before the age they closed it down during the uh during the AIDS crisis absolutely yeah it was a different world all those sex clubs yeah it was a different world yeah but three stories and you couldn't believe what you were seeing.

It's like something out of a bizarre movie. And these were big rings. It wasn't some little place. It was gigantic rings, and there was three levels of people, all these couples going at it. Like Lazy Susans? Like people just copulating on round? They weren't rotating. They didn't revolve.

Oh, they didn't revolve. It was just three round stories. Yeah, they didn't revolve. That's disappointing. It was just three stories. Yeah, it was three stories. And we were like three little kids, you know. They didn't revolve. Oh, they didn't revolve? Yeah, they didn't revolve. That's disappointing. It was just three stories. Yeah, it was three stories. And we were like three little kids, you know. We're looking at this.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I told you I haven't saved the best for last, Gil. This is the first time I ever told that story in public. It's a story you tell friends. But Gilbert's my friend. Frankie, you're my friend.

So what the heck? Yes. Your secret is safe with us and about 40,000 people. Right. Yeah. Since I don't believe anything's going to top that story, this has been Gilbert Gottfried's amazing colossal podcast with my co-host, amazing, colossal podcast with my co-host

Frank Santopadre and the very funny Eddie Deason. Eddie, you're more than a funny actor and a showbiz expert. You're a raconteur. Thank you so much. Thank you, Gilbert. Thank you, Frank. It's been my pleasure. We were really

entertained, man. And now, tell me how I can get that image out of my head. Which one? Mickey Rooney in the stall? So many. So many. Thank you, Eddie.

Sure, my pleasure. Take care. Have a great week. Have a great year. Continued success, Gilbert. You're the best. You want to plug anything, Eddie? Your website? No, I'm actually not.

It's the 40th anniversary of Grease. We're hoping we get some signing shows this year, but nothing specific. So hopefully we'll get some signing shows. That's pretty much my gig now. Okay, buddy. Thank you for this. Thank you. Alright, see you later. I'm David Godfrey. We'll see you next time. Special audio contributions by John Beach. Special thanks to Paul Rayburn, John Murray, John Fodiatis, and Nutmeg Creative. Especially Sam Giovonco and Daniel Farrell for their assistance. We'll always be together. We'll always be together. We'll always be together.

We'll always be together. We'll always be together. We'll always be together. We'll always you next time. Thank you.