Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - 51. Ed Asner

Episode Date: May 19, 2015

Gilbert and Frank ring up one of their favorite character actors, seven-time Emmy winner Ed Asner, to talk about his early days in the business, his seven memorable seasons as the irascible Lou Grant on "The Mary Tyler Moore Show" and his roles in hugely popular films like "Elf" and Pixar's "Up." Also, Ed meets Elvis, co-stars with Edward G. Robinson, beats up Jack Lemmon and lusts after Cloris Leachman. PLUS: Sam Jaffe! Michael Cole! "The Duke" names names! The comic genius of Ted Knight! And Ed dishes dirt on Santa Claus! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Hi, this is Gilbert Gottfried, and this is Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast. I'm here with my co-host, Frank Santopadre. Our guest this week has won seven Emmy Awards, five Golden Globes, and the Screen Actors Guild's Life Achievement Award. Actors Guild's Life Achievement Award. He starred in two celebrated TV shows, including what many consider the best situation comedy in television history, The Mary Tyler Moore Show, as well as its Emmy-winning spinoff, Lou Grant. He's had memorable roles in Roots and Rich Man, Poor Man, and has appeared in dozens of movies, including JFK and Pixar's Up, and worked with everyone from John Wayne

to Elvis Presley. He may also hold the distinction of playing the role of Santa Claus more times than any other actor. Please welcome a genuine show business legend, Ed Asner. Listen, would you like a lozenge, by the way? I'd like to unwrap one for you and hand it over. I surely think you could use it. Well, how are you, boyos? We're good. Welcome. Thanks for doing the show, Ed. We appreciate it. Now, with an introduction like that, I'd be a schmuck to miss it.

Now, what is it with you and Santa Claus? Well, he's a chubby fellow. And, you know, I think we got to stick together and fight for our rights of waterpour. Because like a Jew playing Santa Claus this many times. Well, you know, look, what dominated the field of comedy in the early part of the 20th century? It was always the immigrants. I mean, the Irish had dominated in the 19th century, I guess. But come the 20th century, it's the Jews and the Italians.

And you're talking to a Jew and an Italian right now. So that's why I do Santa Claus. I know how to make him real. You've played him so many times. I lost count going through IMDb, but of course famously in the movie Elf.

Well, I want everybody to be sure and realize that he's a heterosexual. And, you know, there will be irritations and rough spots. Maybe a little jock itch, who knows. You've killed Santa Claus for me with the jockage part I'm saying

I'm now heartbroken that Santa Claus has jockage oh yeah I mean you know sitting on that god damn sleigh all day sweating those heavy clothes you've heard of global warming, haven't you?

Well, that's when the jock gets cropped up, if you'll forgive the expression. I didn't realize Santa Claus' sexuality was even in question. No, I didn't say his sexuality. The jock gets doesn't question your sexuality. It just says that you've been a little overactive and not showering enough. Oh, God. I don't know. Maybe he picked it up from one of his reindeer.

Maybe. Maybe. Now, you also kicked the shit out of Jack Lemmon? Who? Oh, yeah. Oh, well, that was easy. That was easy. And you know, that son of a bitch loved it.

Did he? He loved it. When I hit him the first time, and I felt very sure I missed him, and he came up, and I saw the goddamn marks on his face. I felt so horrible. But he was grinning, and he said, yeah, it's all right, it's all right. So then I did it again, did the stunt again. And I made more marks.

So I felt like a real turd. We should point out to our listeners that was in the movie JFK, you were playing Guy Bannister, a suspected conspirator. One of those great Americans. Yeah. And looking through your list of movies and TV shows, we realize you were in this movie, The Old Man Who Cried Wolf. Yeah. Edward G. Robinson's, I don't know if...

Yeah, Edward G. Robinson. That was his last one. It was close to his last one. And The Great Sam Jaffe, too. That's right. They were both in G. Robinson. That was his last one. It was close to his last one. And the great Sam Jaffe, too. That's right. They were both in it. Yeah, yeah. And Marty Balsam.

I forget. Diane Baker, I think, played the wife. And I played the phony psychiatrist who tries to tell him that he's imagining things. who tries to tell him that he's imagining things. Now, those are three great actors to be with, Robinson, Jaffe, and Martin Balsam. Yeah. I mean, so what, could you have any recollections on any of them?

Oh, well, sure. Well, I mean, I was awed by the fact that Robinson, I was going to be working with Robinson. So Wally Grauman was directing, and what he wanted to do was because he didn't want to have any conflict with Robinson, he staged it all so that Robinson would be on one side of the room

and he could photograph him simply there. Robinson came on, saw the setup, he says, why am I stuck over here? I mean, I should be in there mingling. And Robinson threw up his hands and said, all right, all right. So he then blocked it with Robinson appearing in the midst of the people in the room. Well, as we started to rehearse, the dialogue

director, as I started to do my lines, kept giving me a hands up, meaning raise my volume, raise my volume, meaning that Robinson was hard of hearing or deaf, and that for the rehearsal, I should practically shout my lines to him. So I did that. Then comes time to shoot, and he lowers his hands, meaning now talk normally. So it was a strain. But Robinson was, you know, he's like me.

You know, I'm at death's door, but I can shout out a line that will make your tuchus tremble. Your tuchus tremble. Trembling tuchus is my motto. It may have been turning me on. Oh, well, that's not hard to do. It may have been one of Robinson's. I think Soylent Green was his last role. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, but it was one of his last parts. So was he basically easy to work with? Yeah, he was no problem. It went very easily. He was a sweet man. And Sam Jaffe, who we all remember from The Day the Earth Stood Still.

Dr. Zorba. Yes, and Dr. Zorba, most famous of all. Yeah, yeah. It went smoothly. I don't think the movie won any awards, the TV movie. But it was nice to be with them.

You know, Gilbert and I, we're obsessed, Ed, about the old ABC movies of the week. We talk about it all the time. You were in Haunts of the Very Rich with your pal Cloris Leachman. The Girl Most Likely To, written by Joan Rivers, with Stocker Channing. And when you and I met at The View, we met backstage at The View, and I asked you about a movie called The Last Child with Michael Cole, which I remember very well as a kid. And you had very clear memories of it.

Yeah, it was a futuristic novel. It was like China, where having babies was limited, I think. I don't even know if you could have one without permission. It talks about this. Yeah, I guess they didn't get permission and she wanted to have this baby. So it's about their trying to avoid capture apprehension by the government so she can get her baby. And you played the heavy. Yeah. Well, I kind of did it, though.

And Frank just mentioned Cloris Leachman, who I was lucky enough to work. You slept with her? Yes. Yeah, I fucked Cloris Leachman. I'm going to see her in a few days. I'll bring it up to her. I went down on Cloris Leachman. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. Well, I can tell you. He's got no response. She was Miss Chicago, I think. She was Miss Chicago. Really? I didn't know that. And boy, did I want her.

I really wanted her. You wanted a fuck, Cloris Leachman? What? Yeah, I did I wanted it so that you know we got chummy

when we were doing the Mary Tyler it's an old story but it bears repeating and we got real chummy of course

the two things Cloris despises in life smoking and fat and I don't know what the hell she was doing with you, but I think she ignored it.

Smoking and fat. And so we got warmer and cozier and very appreciative of each other. And finally she said, okay, now we will culminate our relationship if you lose 30 pounds. And, okay, I said, I will set out to do that. Well, I have to tell you that I lost 29, and I just couldn't hit that 30 mark. I don't know.

I think both of us were very relieved. It just didn't happen. That's great. The boy, I wanted her. You worked with Cloris on a roast. Yeah. Tell Ed about it. She was terrific. She was very funny.

Was that the Charlie Sheen roast? No, it may have been the Joan Rivers, I think. I'm not sure. What are you talking about? No, I just worked with her on a roast. She was terrific. Oh, I see. I see. Well, she's a wildcat.

Now, you also... But I... You know, she's a wildcat. Now, you also... But I... You know, it's amazing how on the Mary Tyler Moore show, we had two people with the most distinctive asses in the world. Ted Knight had a duck's ass. When he'd button his coat and he'd walk around and you could see that little shelf sticking out there

and he was just strutting away. And Cloris has the most unbelievable buns in the world. He has an ass that should go into the Hall of Fame. So Cloris Leachman, we've learned today, Cloris Leachman has a great ass. Yes. And Ted Knight. And Ted Knight.

So, the two people... You know, paradise would be the permission to perpetually walk behind Cloris Leachman. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. perpetually walk behind Chloris Leachman. Or if you can't get her, Ted Knight. No, well, yeah. I mean, if you feel that way, I'd go. I'll take Chloris first.

Ted Knight. I've heard people say that there was some tension with Ted Knight on the set. What was he like to work with? Well, Ted was the funniest man I've ever known. I mean, he was brilliant. He really was. But he was also,

you see, names fly out. Paranoid. He had certain paranoids. So in the beginning when I was winning awards, Emmys and Golden Globes, and he got very dark and gloomy from time to time, and he said I was buying the awards. I naturally took it as an insult.

We'd have spats. And then every Friday night, Gavin McLeod and Ted and I and our wives would all go out and have dinner together at a local restaurant. And we'd love each other very much. But then he'd sink into his paranoia from time to time. And it was difficult to counter. The best, the most instructive time ever was one time he made some absurd accusation against me,

and I hated him. I just hated him, and I couldn't take it. So we did the show, Friday night, did the show. He got on, and he was as funny as ever. I got on there there and I flopped like the biggest turd in the world. All I

could think of was my anger, my hate. And it taught me a lesson. Whatever is going on outside, when you go on the stage, you leave it all outside. And you've got to be sweet and round and perfect.

Was it true, Ed? So you've got to be like Cloris Leachman. Yeah. Nice. That dingbat. What? Nice callback on Gilbert's part. Ed, do I have this right that I read that Ted sometimes felt that people would equate him a little too much with his character?

Oh, yeah. Well, there's a great story about that. I don't know. Maybe the second year of the season. I don't know. And he came in, Alan Burns, one of our creator-producers, and he said he wanted to leave the show. And Alan said, well, I just don't like people thinking

that I'm that kind of person that Ted Baxter is. They can't distinguish between me and the acting and Alan must have worked for at least a half hour convincing him how people did distinguish how they appreciated his value

his greatness as an actor his uniqueness as a comedian and finally convinced him to stay Greatness as an actor, his uniqueness as a comedian, and finally convinced him to stay. At that moment, Jim Brooks, the other producer, walks in and says, Dad, I don't feel to be the biggest schmuck in the world. Nice timing.

Yeah, yeah. Oh, it was unbelievable. Hilarious. Just a couple of things about the Mary Tyler Moore show, Ed, before we move on. And I was telling Gilbert about this, that the first taping, what they called the preliminary taping of the show, was actually a disaster. Oh, no, yeah. That was a taping that was on a Tuesday night. And we were to shoot on Friday night.

And the show kind of just terribly fell flat. So there was one adjustment made. Grant Tinkert told the two producers, Mary was in tears

and all that. So there's only one adjustment made. Our dialogue coach, Marge Mullen, said that because Valerie was so abrasive of everything,

that Lisa, the daughter of Cloris in the show, talked about liking her, so they ought to make that more explicit. Well, I like Aunt Rhoda, or whatever. They put in that line, and that kind of salvaged that relationship and softened the abrasiveness of Rhoda.

Then when we got to Friday night, it was just that we went out there to kill him, and we did. And when I got to, you know what, you got spunk. That was in the first scene. Sure. I think it was the first scene. You got spunk. I hate spunk. And that audience erupted into the biggest laugh I'd ever heard in my life. You play it so beautifully. I watched it today. It's the timing of it, the way you walk up to her and you smile and you draw her in and then she does the false modesty thing

and the turn of it is... I understand there was a lot of wrestling with that scene and that line reading that it was difficult for a while. You were doing it too intensely? I don't know. I do a lot of things intensely. And I may have, but I don't think I could have been any more intense

than what I see on the screen. Yeah. The Scorebet app here with trusted stats and real-time sports news. Yeah, hey, who should I take in the Boston game? Well, statistically speaking. Nah, no more statistically speaking. I want hot takes. I want knee-jerk reactions. That's not

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This is a paid advertisement from BetterHelp. As a podcast listener, you've heard from us before. Today, let's hear what members have told us. One member said, I would recommend my therapist 1,000 times over. She has truly changed my life. And it always seemed like on the, to see what it can do for you. That's betterhelp.com. And it always seemed like on the show that there was kind of like every now and then a sexual chemistry between Mary and Lou Grant. Oh, really?

Really? Oh, how perceptive of you to have discovered that. My goodness. Oh, my. I'm going to give you two lozenges. Yes, sir. Boy. No shit. Isn't that wonderful? Well, unfortunately, I never was able to really reap that crop. But I sure wanted to. They do have you sleeping with a happy homemaker, though, in the series. Oh, shut up. Now, I've heard Mary Tyler Moore had a great ass. She used to wear those pants on the Dick Van Dyke show.

Well, sure. The capri pants. She had those long legs that ended in those wonderful curves. Yeah, you couldn't beat that. That was a hell of a body. That famous story of Rob Reiner as a boy grabbing her tush on the set of the Dick Van Dyke show. Oh, did he?

Yeah, supposedly. And he was chastised. I can imagine that. I heard Mary got really angry and told Carl Reiner. That's right. And Carl Reiner just started laughing. Right. That's the story.

Carl what? Carl Reiner. Yeah. Yeah, Rob Reiner grabbed, when he was a kid, grabbed Mary Tyler Moore's ass, and Mary got mad and told his father, Carl Reiner, and Carl Reiner just started laughing. Well, yes. And we can point at that to say that's where Carl screwed up. Tell us a little bit about working.

From that point on, Rob Reiner was a lost soul. Lacking parental discipline. He then went on, I don't know how many times he's been accused of rape, and pillage, and molestation, all of that. Because Carl laughed. Better that God should have laughed. Ed, tell us a little bit about working with Betty, with Betty White. I heard you tell a great story about her professionalism,

about a scene where Gavin McCloud slams her down on a cake. Well, it was where she somehow gets, or Gavin gets assigned to work with her or something, and she finally gets him in this, and we all think he's a schmuck, and we stop it, don't do it, quit it, don't take it, because she unloads on him all the time. And finally she's designing a wedding reception or something,

it's a big cake. Because she can't fit the wedding gown, whoever is supposed to be fitted on isn't there. She has Gavin put it on so she can fit it to him. He's wearing his wedding gown and she's inflicting on him. And finally, as the scene is written, he picks her up and dumps her on the cake. And as we shot it, I could hear her ass hit the board underneath the cake. And I knew that it had to hurt her coccyx. But she, like a trooper, acted like nothing had happened. And right on the first take, and she then ad-libbed, she then took a dab of the cake

after he slapped her down on it. She takes a dab of the cake and says, needs a little lemon. Yeah, it's great. It's a great moment. Yeah. Now, I just met and sort of worked with recently Gavin McLeod, who seems like one of the nicest people.

Yes, yes, absolutely. He was one of the seven years of sweetness, you can say. And Gavin lived from day to day laughing at Ted, uh, Ted, Ted, just, just tickled the crap out of Lila Gavin.

God. And he, uh, he, he was almost a, a, I channeled Ted through Gavin another time, or there was a, I don't know, mid mid-season or maybe late series, who knows.

Gavin and I are in the stands, and Ted's on stage doing the scene. And we laugh our asses off at him. And then he comes over to us and he says, Now, when I do it again, I'm going to try it a different way. Tell me which way you guys like. going to try it a different way. Tell me which way you guys like. So he did it a different way. It was totally different. And it was still

as funny. They laughed our asses off again. And here Gavin and I, who strained to get it right one time, are marveling at this bastard. He does it easily and as effectively two times.

Then he comes over again. He says, I'm going to try the third way this time. Tell me what you think. And it was funny. Not as funny as the first two, but it was funny. And we just couldn't do anything but marvel. first two, but it was funny. And we just couldn't do anything but marvel. Finally, when he shot the scene, he used mostly the first method, the first way, and that's what made him memorable. He was brilliant. You know, I listened to Ted Knight. He did a lot of cartoon voiceovers when

I was a kid. A lot of superhero shows, and you'd see them in things like Psycho. You'd see them in bit parts. You'd never had any idea or inkling that this guy was going to be a great comedian. And he was. All he was doing was playing Germans. Yeah.

And a lot of voiceovers, a lot of cartoon shows in the 60s. Well, and before he came to California, he was in Connecticut doing a, he had a dummy. And he did ventriloquism. I'm sure he did it badly, but he had a kid show on. I didn't know that. That's great. Yeah.

Now, did you work with Boris Karloff? Yeah, I worked with him in the Venetian affair. That's right. I played the Rome CIA chief and who was it, Robert Vaughn?

I believe so. Who was the agent? Yeah, and I had assigned him to do it. And we filmed at the, what is it, Greystoke or Greystone? Wonderful Beverly Hills mansion. Was it Robert Vaughn? And what was Boris Karloff like? I've always been a big fan.

Well, he was like a very nice, calm, reserved. I didn't exchange that many pleasantries with him. We didn't have that much together. have that much together. But very calm and reserved and very, very pleasant. No hysterics.

No histrionics. He just played it as he usually does. We're big Karloff fans, Ed. We had his daughter on the show, Sarah Karloff. Yeah. Yeah.

Let's talk a little bit about the early days. Well, did she tell you anything about his history? Where did he come from? Well, he was British. I know he had a British accent, certainly. And he was part Indian. But the name implies Eastern European origin. Oh, no, no, no.

His real name was William Henry Pratt. And now in England, he came up with the name Karloff himself. Yeah, his daughter said she had no idea where Karloff came from. Boris Karloff's name was William Henry Pratt. He was English, part Indian. And I heard in England, the reason he came up with the name Boris Karloff as his stage name was I heard in England calling somebody a Pratt

is like calling someone a cunt. Why would they allow that name in England if they're that goddamn sensitive? a prat is like calling someone a cunt. Why would they allow that name in England if they're that goddamn sensitive? That's a good question. Also, you worked with another favorite of ours, Charles Bronson. Oh, yeah. What did I? Well, I did. Yes, Virginiaia there is a santa claus with him and um i think was it a route 66 i did i can't remember maybe Route 66, I think I might have done with him.

You work with Rod Steiger on Route 66. I know that. Yeah, yeah. Now, what can you tell us first about Bronson? Well, he was the sweetest person in the world. Wow. I mean, I heard horror stories about him. Unbelievable horror stories about him. Unbelievable horror stories.

And, you know, all I know is that when I was around him, he was as sweet as he could be. I heard on, Jack Plants had that show, the big show, or the big tent, something like that,

where he was an impresario of a circus. Do you remember? No, I don't remember that show. Jack Palance? Yeah. Yeah. So I hear that... Bronson came on the show. And at one point, there was a fight, I guess, and that he nicked Palance.

And that he nicked Palance. And that Palance then went crazy and mopped up the floor with him. Really? Yeah, I don't know how true it is. That's good stuff. I heard another story about Palance. There was a famous character, a famous stuntman named Charlie Budzinski or something like that. That was Bronson's actual name.

Yeah, wait a minute. I can't remember this guy's name. Anyway, he had been a killer in World War II. Some or other, they were in an elevator a bunch of War II. And some are that they were in an elevator,

a bunch of he-men, and this guy made a remark,

and Palance didn't like it. And he looked at this guy,

and the guy looked back at Palance and said, Don't give me that look. You raise one finger, it means I'll rip your face off. Palance didn't pursue it. Wow. pursue it wow so there's there's always a um there's always a joker isn't there yeah there's always somebody tougher than you are yeah yeah tell us about working with with the duke and with the great howard hawks ed on on el dorado now did did would you say and it wouldn't surprise me at all if he did, that John Wayne hated

the Jews? No, I'm not going to say it. He wasn't a brilliant man. But I mean and he was charming in his own way whenever I'd see him I saw him once after that and he couldn't have been more warm

and cordial and I'm sure that there were Jewish actors or Jewish people in the business that he no I didn't feel hate, I didn't feel hate. I certainly didn't feel hate. But, of course, he, along with Ward Bond and Roy Brewer, ruined a lot of people's lives.

Yeah, I had heard John Wayne and Ward Bond, during the Red Scare, were turning people in as commies. No, they weren't turning them in. They created Roy Brewer, who was the president of the IATSE. They controlled who got to work. The most notable case, and she's about to be honored, is Marsha Hunt. case, and she's about to be honored, is Marcia Hunt. Now, what's her name? Stanley Kramer and I think it was Sinatra were producing a movie, and she had gone to D.C. with the Committee for the First Amendment to complain about U.S. Act. And because she had done that.

The House of Un-American Activities Committee. Yeah. Because she had done that, Kramer and Sinatra wanted to use her in this film. And got a call from that organization that Dwayne and Bond and Brewer controlled, saying that they couldn't use her. Or they would get protests and, you know, picketing and all that.

So, oh, come on, I must be... Well, okay, they said. She can work in the film if she apologizes. So then I went to Marsha Hunt, and I said that you can have the job if you apologize. Write a letter of apology.

And she said, apologize for what? She said, I won't write it. They couldn't use her. that won't write it. They couldn't use her. And she went on to do wonderful, lovely service for people here in L.A. when she couldn't work as an actress.

And she had a good spring off as a young starlet. She had a career ahead of her. And they helped nip that bud. Wow. Ed, what do you remember about making a movie that Gilbert and I like? We had Danny Aiello on the show recently. You made a movie with him and Paul Newman called Fort Apache, the Bronx.

Called what? Fort Apache, the Bronx. With Paul Newman? Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, he was a real... That was probably one of his first big breaks. Danny, yeah. And he throws a kid off the roof in that movie.

Yeah. And has a big fight with Paul Newman. But he, he was quite something. Did you have some... My only contact with him was during the lineup. I'm talking to the,

to the lined up officers getting in their morning spiel. And he's playing sleepy up until that point. So in the middle of my speech, he drops his nightstick and it wasn't in the script. And I stand over there, I look at him. Look, look, look. And I said, pick it up. But he sheepishly picks it up.

And we go on. And that was my contact with Danny Ayo. Do I have it right that you had some ideas for that movie that fell on deaf ears? Yeah. Where do you hear these things? I do a lot of research, Ed. My God. We heard a lot of it from Perfecto Tellez.

He does research for us. You know, there were two cops who were like the advisors. Supposedly, Fort Apache was their story. There were two cops. And at the end of the show, Paul Newman comes in, and he's turning in his badge because he's discussing what's happened. His girlfriend's been killed, and there were riots, and all provoked by my coming in and taking over the precinct. You were Chief Connolly.

Yeah. Right. So he's ready to walk out, and I give him a big goddamn speech about it. You know, we're the barrier between them, and the thin blue line, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I went to the director, the writer, everybody, and I said,

this guy's done more to create this chaos than anybody else. Why can't you have this last scene written whereby Newman says, okay, I'll keep my badge, but I want you to know I'm going to watch you very closely. And

wherever and whenever I can, I'm going to blow the whistle on you to tell you what you've done to create this kind of chaos. And because I was weak and I didn't have that much stature to make this kind of change, everybody said, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay. So they didn't really listen to your ideas?

No. And what do you remember of Paul Newman? He was a beautiful guy. Very lovely. He was nice to be with. He certainly was cute. And he did good things with his money and his talent. Sure did.

What do you remember about working with Elvis, Ed? You worked with Elvis on Kid Galahad and then on Change of Habit. Both times. He was a different person the second time than I was the first. But both times, he was a lovely guy. How was he different? No problems. Worked hard.

First time, he had quite an entourage following him around. Good old boys. But, and his hands were all chopped up, knocked up, because he was in the middle of his karate period, breaking boards and all that crap. But by the time we did Change of Habit, he was

not breaking boards anymore. I think he was breaking hearts. Now, Change of Habit, you worked with someone who would be very important in your career. Oh, shut up. Is it true that you and Mary

did not really get acquainted? No, we didn't touch each other. I never saw her even. Really? Yeah. She never came out of her trailer and rubbed elbows? Well, I don't even think

she was called in the days I was supposed to work. Interesting. Yeah. Now, we have to talk about this, Ed. You've done a million voices for animated shows and movies, The Simpsons and Duckman and Batman and American Dad and a show I actually worked on called Angry Beavers.

We have to talk about Up, about Pixar's Up. Yeah. I mean, your agent submitted you for that role? Did they kind of write it with you in mind? What happened? I don't think they wrote it with me in mind. My agent submitted me for it. I didn't pay attention.

And not until later did I find out that I was doing a reading of a one-man show about a Holocaust survivor. about a Holocaust survivor. The Jewish... It's a Holocaust survivor who's now suffering dementia. Yeah, yeah. And the Jews were having a fundraiser in Alameda. So I was asked to, and I was delighted to

do a reading of this one-man show, which was a great piece of drama, at the fundraiser, or for the fundraiser. So, little did I know that

Pete Docter, the chief creator, and Bob Peterson had come to this fundraiser, saw me do this terribly stark, dramatic Holocaust survivor, and that's when they decided to use me as Carl in Up. Yeah, fascinating. They saw something in you, and they knew this is the character. I guess so, yeah. I just saw the biggest butterfly float by. That's nice.

Gilbert, Gilbert, come back here. You named the butterfly Gilbert. I'm touched. It's a great movie. I've cried watching it many times. It's got the weirdest beginning. Yeah. Weird what?

It's got the strangest beginning of waiting for a cutesy cartoon and yeah and it breaks your heart yeah the first 10 minutes it's a it's a double love story i refer to it as uh ellie of course dying and then uh and then the battle with the kid until finally you see he loves the kid. And did I read somewhere that you were anxious when it first came out? You saw it three times. You went to see it three times? Yeah, I didn't relax until I saw it the third time. The first two times was in 3D, and I don't like 3D.

I don't either. It was too dark. And then I saw it in 2D, and I began to relax and enjoy what I saw before me. But I got to tell you, I did a good voice. Yes, I did a good voice. But Pete Docter is the genius of that movie. It's got a lot of things going for it. And I heard before you got the Mary Tyler Moore show,

you were looking through the want ads in the papers. I had two bad years in L.A. First year was great. I made more money in the six months or seven months I was here than I had ever made in the six years I was in New York. So, and then around 68, 69, I took a tumble. And the job is dried up. As my agent said at the time, he said, I don't know what it is.

I go in and talk to them in the offices, and they say, oh, yeah, he's great. He's wonderful. But they never come around to hiring you. And I think, so I had two bad years. And my son talks about this all the time. I'd go out and get the L.A. Times Sunday version with its help-wanted ads. I'd somehow buy it as soon as it was dropped off the truck. a truck, and I'd bring it home and be pouring over it late Saturday night, seeing what kind of jobs that I could possibly take or get, and it was never anything that was worth pursuing.

I was either too old or I needed a particular training that I didn't have. Glad you stuck with acting, Ed. Yeah, thank God. You wound up winning a Screen Actors Guild Life Achievement Award. Well, yeah, I got born. I got born. And you... Yeah.

You starred with Will Ferrell in Elf. Yeah, just tell us a little bit about Elf. Well, I think it's the best Christmas movie there is. It's certainly better than that saccharine miracle

on 34th Street. You know, I was in Buddy the Elf. You were? I was in the cartoon version of the movie Elf. They did a cartoon called Buddy the Elf.

I know. I was in it, too. I played Santa Claus in that. So we worked together. Yeah, I didn't even know it. You idiot. We worked together. I should have canned you. You and I worked together

in a movie or a cartoon. This is amazing. Buddy the Yelp. I think the fact that it was released is amazing if you were in it. And Gilbert, didn't you play Santa Claus once in something else? I played Santa Claus in a cartoon series, I think Mandy and Billy. And I played the evil, demented Santa Claus. Well, I can see that happening.

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Well, I, um, the thing about the live-action elf, Will Ferrell was so goddamn good that he was so goddamn good that he was so funny and charming that he snapped me into such a tension that I had to steep myself in my Santa Claus to the extent he was steeped into his version of an elf. Oh, you had to go deeper into the character, huh? Yeah.

It's a really fun movie. Movie I love. I love it. Me too. I love it. Me too. And there's nothing funnier than when the little person, I forget his name, the wonderful actor. Peter Dinklage.

Huh? Peter Dinklage. Yeah. Yeah. Decides to beat the crap out of him. That's great. He's an angry elf. An angry Dinklage.

That was so funny. Okay. Okay. That was so funny. Okay. Now, to wrap things up, we've been talking to my Buddy the Elf co-star, Ed Asner.

And this is Gilbert Gottfried, and this has been Gilbert Gottfried's amazing, colossal podcast with my co-host, Frank Santopadre. And Ed Asner has told us, informed us that Ted Knight had a great ass and that Carl Reiner was a sexual offender. Rob Reiner. Rob Reiner was a sexual offender. Rob Reiner. Rob Reiner was a sexual offender.

I'm sorry, Carl. Carl is the reason Rob Reiner is a sexual offender. Yeah, it's all Carl's fault. Ed, I just also want to say that, you know, you play Thomas Edison, Norman Cousins, Huey Long, Warren Buffett, the Pope, and Santa Claus. That's range. Well, you write Ulysses S. Grant, you've got Ulysses S. Grant. Oh, and Ulysses S. Grant. Oh, yeah.

I'm going to throw that in. And did I say Thomas and Guy Bannister? And there's my one-man show of FDR. Don't forget that. And you played FDR. That is range, my friend. Yeah. Now, our mutual friend Barry Greenberg tells me that you do do some work with autism speaks and and you have a poker tournament that that's a charity i'm familiar

with too oh really autism speaks yeah gilbert gilbert does some work my son is is a project director for autism speaks my younger son uh has autism, and my grandson has autism. So I'm quite directly and intensely involved in this phenomenal subject. And is there something you want to plug? The poker tournament, I'm told, is in what, September? I believe so, yeah. Okay. You want the exact date? Yeah, just give us the information. It believe so, yeah. Okay. You want the exact date?

Yeah, just give us the information. It's a little early. Okay. What, well, I just have, my son, who's the project director for Autism Speaks, he cons me into doing this poker tournament, and I bombed out the last time I played.

You played, Gilbert? No. It's September 12th is when it's scheduled. September 12th in L.A. Yeah, I got involved with autism because there was an article in the New York Times of a man who was able to communicate for the first time with his six-year-old son who had autism by imitating my voice from Aladdin. I'll be God damn. Yeah. And in my voice, he said to him, how do you feel?

And he said, I'm sad. I have no friends. Yeah, Ron Susskind. Ron Susskind? Yeah. Really? You know Ron? I know that name.

I forget how I know him. Well, you know, Gilbert played the parrot in the movie Aladdin, in the Disney movie. And that was the character that this child responded to. The father put on a parrot puppet of my character and started imitating. Oh, for God's sake. He started imitating my voice, and his son, for the first time, reacted,

and that was their first conversation. Well, I want to tell you, was that that a fundraiser which my son puts on it's the third time they've done it I think light up the blue it's called light up the blue yeah all wonderful kinds of the performers at the other night's performance was this girl, and I can't remember her name, but she's probably in her early 20s. She sang Ave Maria with a fantastic voice and found out afterwards, or as they announced afterwards, that she

did not speak, that not until she started to sing had she ever spoken. Wow. she ever spoken. So the number of marvelous stories that occur, and tragic stories too, in terms of autism, in terms of many diseases, it's just unbelievable. Is there a website, Ed, or somewhere where people can go and make contributions? Oh, sure. Autism Seeks speaks but I don't know the website if you'll hang on a minute I'll see if

my daughter has it one second go ahead we'll edit it in is there a website to pledge money for autism speaks is it autism speaks.org it must be Is there a website to pledge money for Autism Speaks? Is it AutismSpeaks.org?

It must be. Pick up the phone. For contributions to Autism Speaks. No, AutismSpeaks.org. Okay. Just look up AutismSpeaks.org. Okay. Just look up AutismSpeaks.org. We got it. AutismSpeaks.org, and your poker tournament is on September 12th in Los Angeles.

Right. It sounds like a very up-to-date operation you have going there of, hey, do we have a number for Autism Speaks? Don't tell me you heard that. Oh, how did you? My God. That's my favorite part of this whole thing. Yeah. Oh, here, wait.

Let me look up the website. Hey, what's the number? For all it doesn't speak! What? It's a good thing I didn't curse her out while I was doing it. That's great. Oh, God. Ed, we're so grateful to you for doing this for us today.

Well, you're a lot of fun. You were a lot of fun, buddy. Thank you. We hope to see you. We a lot of fun, buddy. Thank you. We hope to see you. We'll see you at the tournament. Thanks again. If there's any questions I haven't answered, be sure and call back. We will. We love you, Ed. Thank you.

Lots of love, guys. Bye. Thank you. Never forget another password on your computer or iPhone with Dashlane. And it's free. That's right, free. Get it now at D-A-S-H-L-A-N-E dot com slash Gilbert. If you like listening to comedy, try watching it on the internet.

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