Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - Amy Yasbeck

Episode Date: May 4, 2020

Actress and activist Amy Yasbeck visits the show to talk about golden age comedians, the directing style of Mel Brooks, working with Gilbert on "Wings" and the "Problem Child" franchise, and the playfulness and generosity of her husband, the late, great John Ritter. Also, Morey Amsterdam sings "Yuk-a-Puk," Gilbert gets nominated for a Razzie, Amy cuts the rug with Leslie Nielsen and Jack Warden changes accents in mid-movie. PLUS: Emil Sitka! "The New Love American Style"! Anne Bancroft plays Maria Ouspenskaya! John borrows shtick from Jerry Lewis! And 6-year-old Amy pitches the Easy-Bake Oven! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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going for dessert. Make this your best summer yet with PC. Hi, this is Gilbert Gottfried, and this is Gilbert Gottfried's amazing, colossal podcast with my co-host, Frank Santopadre. Our guest this week is a talented actress of both the big and small screen, as well as an aortic awareness advocate and the founder of the John Ritter Foundation for Aortic Health. You know her work from popular TV shows such as Dallas, Magnum P.I., Designing Women, Get a Life, Just Shoot Me, Hot in Cleveland, Bones, Modernings, in which she starred as the uptight, high-strung

Casey Davenport. She's also done memorable work in feature films Pretty Woman, The Mask, Home for the holidays Robin Hood men Robin Hood men tight Dracula did I shut the fuck up track men and tight rock Robin Hood man in tights. Dracula dead and loving it. And perhaps her proudest moment, sharing the big screen with her favorite entertainer, me, in Problem Child and Problem Child 2. In a four-decade career that...

In a four-decade career when she began playing... That she began by playing a Russian spy with an accent she swiped from a Bullwinkle cartoon. She's worked with Mel Brooks, Richard Gere, Jim Carrey, Julia Roberts, Kara Leifer, Stephen Weber, Tim Matheson, Jason Alexander, and Dick Van Dyke. Please welcome to the show a funny, versatile performer and a woman who Mel Brooks once described as Deborah Carr with a little Jewish old man inside.

Ask me, Gilbert, how many times we've worked together. Oh, yes. Ready? Okay. Oh. So, Amy, how many times have we worked together? Four? I think so. Problem child one, problem child two uh wings twice twice wings twice yes but i would just like to say you never write you never call yes and now he's calling

sure you were you were lewis right you were yes i were the grandson of the sleazy stereo salesman. I think it was pronounced Jewess. Yes. And I was there with what was supposed to be my uncle, the late, great Bill Hickey. Oh, my God. As a matter of fact, I watched the episodes last night. Amy, your character is sitting at the, what is that, the coffee bar?

I don't know what it was. The lunch counter? Yeah, lunch counter, lunch counter. Gilbert, you come over and make a pass at her, and she says, oh, let me see how to put this exactly. Yes, I stick my finger down my throat. We are assuming that Casey had a gag reflex still intact. I never fully developed her backstory, so I think I was faking it.

You're in the Christmas episode too, Gilbert. You're all in the house and all the wallets go missing. You don't remember. I do remember the Christmas episode. It was good. Wasn't that strong, the Christmas episode? I don't know. I thought it was a humdinger.

I didn't remember it until I told my mom. It's the 30th anniversary of Wings, by the way. You know what? shut your fucking face that's not a good sign i remember a line from wings that i don't know if i did it with you or uh why even bring it up you're gonna hurt know. If not, you'll tell me to go fuck myself. That's correct. Or with that, the other, what was her name? The blonde. Farrah Forkey?

No, the blonde. Crystal Bernard. But I remember there was one where one of you says to me, you are the most loathsome, disgusting person I ever saw. And I go, oh, so you've been checking me out. That'd be me. That's right. But that was improvised.

I was just, I didn't know they were rolling. I was just trying to tell you something about how it felt. Yeah, she says head to toe, you're the most repulsive man I ever met. For some reason, Amy, your debut episode called Twisted Sister is not on Hulu. It's missing from the wings run. Yeah, we need to investigate this. That's very weird. Let's call, who would we call?

Steve Levitan. We'll call Steve Lev levitan we'll call steve levitan we'll call somebody we'll call weber no don't don't get it started don't don't poke that bear tell us about working with him because we had him on the show we love him to become a friend yes i'm crazy about him a hundred percent crazy about him and i got him a really good job one time oh yes and Dracula yes Mel Brooks Mel as I call him had had somebody else in mind for the the part and I said have you met Stephen Webber and then they fell in love Stephen Mel and then he was he was um in Dracula dead and loving it. Or as somebody just wrote to me, literally, literally on Facebook. Yeah, I'm on there. Okay, boomer, whatever. There was a lady that wrote to

me, a girl and her name was, her name is Amy Yazbeck. I'm not going to say the last name because I don't want to check her out, but with a nice Colombian last name. But her first name was Amy Yazbek. So I wrote her and I said, hi, nice to meet you. Is this a family name? Because there are Yazbeks all over. It's a Lebanese last name. Yeah. We got around.

So and she said, she wrote back and Google translates. It's like, no, my father named me in your honor. He saw you in a movie called Happy Dracula. Happy Dracula is, I almost don't want to say it out loud because I could have used it as my password for everything. So the Yazbeks sometimes spell it with an S and sometimes spell it with a Z like our friend David Yazbek. When they're incorrect. You're David's cousin? Here's the deal. Here's the deal. Here's the deal. I'm going to say yes on that because Lebanon is small, and I know kind of what town his family is from.

Our family, we Yazbeks, are from a town in northern Lebanon in the mountains called Turza. And my cousins, like my dad's brothers and sisters, spelled it Y-a-z-b-e-c-k and still do it's like however like when you came to ellis island you said yazbek and they went okay and wrote it down as if you sneezed and they were trying to like achoo is it a huh is it huh but uh it's all the same we all have the same same. Can you say he definitely is a relative? No. So we can use it as a story. He thinks he's related to you, Amy. Okay, here's the deal.

David Yazbek, Y-A-Z-B-E-K, is definitely some kind of cousin. All the Yazbeks are related, we're all i'm also a musical genius oh just by having taste and thinking david yazbek is the shit he most certainly is a musical genius i am not a musical genius but he is and and we of course uh started in the both problem child movies. Are we back to us now? Yes. Yes. And you were Mrs. Healy in the first one.

And then you were some unknown woman who John Ritter just met. He's the nurse. She's the nurse. Yes. How dare you? I was, I was, is that my last name? Yeah, Annie Young. So my, yes, I was nurse Annie Young.

Oh, yes. last name yeah any young so my yes i was nurse annie young oh uh yes and it was fantastic to play both roles because i'm a a master of i don't know i played a nurse in the other one and i still have those little glasses that i wore and i just made them into reading glasses i don't throw away a thing oh you saved all that stuff, huh? I am terrible. You guys met at the table read at Dennis's house? At Dennis Dugan's house? I could tell you, but I'd have to kill you.

I guess so. Yes. No, not Gilbert. Gilbert, you weren't there. No, I wasn't. He's talking about John. No, he was talking about John. You and John.

Yes, we did. John, I'm sorry. It was a table read, but it was more like we were sitting on a bunch of couches around the thing. What I remember is when we were making that. Well, I remember the last day on that movie. On the first one? On the first one. I was already wrapped for all my uh scenes yeah and i was about to head home the next day and

i said to john uh okay it's my last day it's been fun work with you blah blah and and he says with like a depressed look on his face he says like um oh well, well, you know, the way it is. Yeah. You do these. They offer you something. You do it. And then you hope for the best. And I think he he was waiting for Problem Child to be a disaster.

Of course. Yes. Are you kidding me? I think we all were. Well, it was, you know, it was like, it was like a cartoon. It was really huge. You know, I mean, like played really, come on, Gilbert, it's you. And it's me. I was doing my version of it. Ah, you know, we were all just like screaming. John was the most realistic and you know method of all of us that's trouble usually when john and even jack jack warden was like everybody was like hey he had a southern accent and not otherwise jack warden yeah jack he jack

warden also did some scenes with a southern accent. I noticed that. And then the others, like a New York accent. He was like Foghorn Leghorn for some of it. Wah, wah, wah, I'll tell you, boy. I'm Big Ben, and I'm here to say wah, wah, wah. And some of it, it's like, hey, so anyway. Good for him.

Fucking who cares? He was great. I still have a button that says Big Ben for mayor. Oh, I have so much stuff. Jack Warden was always great. So listen. So on the second one, we were shooting down at, remember the, oh, God, Gilbert. Remember the pizza fight?

Yes, yes. over it remember the pizza fight yes yes and the and the stuff they used on the the pizza to make it look you know the the uh practical the practical effects i don't know what the fuck i'm saying the the stuff to make it look like stringy mozzarella was more like oh i'm gonna throw up oh god i really just got it was more like snot remember yes it was like that slime. Slime. They used to drop on people at whatever, the MTV Awards. I believe that was not the MTV Awards. I think that was Nickelodeon. Nickelodeon. They would drop slime.

It doesn't matter. Don't try to get me off the subject. I'm not. That is my least favorite scene, and I'll tell you why. Do you want to know why why they had me because do you remember oh my god i could go so they went um primary colors i don't know if you know all this john always wore blue this one always wore red nurse annie always wore white and they had me it's like a decorator uh designer thing. I don't know. I'm not that good at the girl stuff. So, but they had me in like a white sweater and like stretch pants or something.

And I've never had a butt. And I haven't even, I didn't even have one to work off. I have a small, very subtle butt. But in that scene, there's a, in that scene of us throwing pizza, there's a shot of me. God, I've never, who gives a fuck? I'm old old now i'm happy to have any butt at any time at all now it's like behind my knees i don't know what that is it could be i could be have back of knee goiters that could be my butt that fell anyway and i'm throwing and i'm throwing the pizza and there's a shot and maybe just to get some loft on the pizza because i was trying to throw it at you

and your date in the booth i kind of squeeze my cheeks together and it is the most unflattering of my, and I was 28, seven, whatever years old. I should have, I know that's not weird talking about, but anyway, so during those times when we were shooting, uh, not Disney MGM, what do we call it? Universal. Yes. Remember? Okay. And there were trailers and Jack Warden would always sit on the steps of his trailer, smoking

a cigar. And John said, you've got a great trailer. Why don't you go in here? And apparently in World War II, he spent World War II in a submarine and was extremely claustrophobic after that so he he could not go in there and even have the door i remember one time he was in there and the even the screen door on it blew shut and he came out like no it's very scary but i loved him he he was terrific and and such a talented actor He and John would do many, many things that the thing where it's like, well, I remember when this was all orange groves,

as far as the eye could see, like acting like they were like really old. Well, when I grew up here and they also used to do things about what you say to people when you see them in a play and it sucks. And you've been invited. Like, what do you say when you, when you go back back so they had a certain kind of comic shorthand together the two of them they would come up with things to say like after a take and and like jack would walk up to john after a particularly terrible take or just to fuck with him and go wow you should have been where i was in other words you should not be in front of the, you should have been where I was. In other words, you should not be in front of the camera. You should have been in this chair

because you shouldn't be there. It was like, nice to see you back on the boards, kid. And then roll your eyes and slap him on the back. Now, Gil, this could be bullshit too, but I heard that Dugan, Dennis Dugan, the director, was enjoying your improvisation. So he shot a lot of

film. Where is that? Yes. Have you had Dugan on? Have you had Dugan on? We haven't had him yet, no. Oh, please. We'll have him on. But he supposedly shot something like 18,000 feet of film a day, and the studio was on his ass because he kept trying to capture something special from you?

Yeah. That doesn't sound right. That sounds like Gilbert sucked, so they kept rolling on him. That's not a compliment. He was nominated for the Golden Raspberry. He was nominated for the golden raspberry. Well, yeah, that's, that's how they shot. They shot that much video of the little twin girls on full house to like one word at a time.

And it's like getting back to the pizza fight. Not only was there the green slime. It wasn't green. It wasn't green. It was clear. It was phlegm. It was phlegm. Yes. Yeah. It was clear. It was phlegm. It was phlegm. Yes. Yeah, it was snot. It was like phlegm and then a little bit of the pizza sauce.

So total goo. And the crust was made out of rubber, a heavy rubber. Yeah. So when they flung it, you got smacked in the head. Unbelievable. Your brain would be ringing. You know, it's surprising, things that look hilarious like that. I did a movie that was not mentioned just now called The Nutty Nut, also known as The Nut House.

We're going to bring it up. Oh, yes. Really? nut also known as the nut house we're gonna bring it up oh yes you really worked you worked with an actor that frank and i have discussed many times oh yes on this show tracy lord's not tracy lord's although she was in it emil sitka who's emil sitka emil sitka to all the Three Stooges fans. Oh, yes, yes, yes. Yes, yes, yes. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. That's like the only person I talked to after a while because there was a lot of weird stuff going on.

But yeah, and Adam Rifkin ended up directing it. Somebody else fell off of it. I forget, but they wanted to get the world's record for the largest pie fight, food fight, pie fight. Okay. So I've been in two food fights. I only got on probable child. I got beamed a couple of times with the rubber and the snot.

The rubber was painful. Let's not just edit that where I just say I got beamed with rubber and snot. We don't want to hear about your personal life i've never gotten paid enough for that oh wasn't ben stiller in that movie too uncredited i can't remember so but wait so there was a giant pie fight right and so there's they're throwing pies we had this whole thing set up and set up. And what people don't realize about pie fights, I don't know what this means, is that so, and then somebody, it might have been Emil, I can't remember, was supposed to shove a pie in my face. And what you do in a pie fight is,

there's the tin, there's the pie, and then there's the whipped cream or the meringue, whatever. And you're supposed to throw it, but you keep your hand on it and you stop. And then the pie and then there's the whipped cream or the meringue or whatever. And you're supposed to throw it, but you keep your hand on it and you stop. And then the pie goes on the person's face. He went like fucking karate style, like through my face. Like he was, he was aiming like behind my head. And not only did pie and everything go up my nose, but it kind of like went and like did a little, and I thought it was broken. and that's the end of my story yeah I it is the it is go ahead yeah I felt like I was in a in a price fight and it was crazy yeah because it would boy would that hit well there was there

were so many takes and then the thing is I believe we broke for a break, not lunch or something. And we all had to go with like just crusty, fuck it. I'm swearing a lot. I don't care. Crusty, like clothes with all the goop on it. It just felt, it felt very like, you know, Caligula. Like, okay, now let's all drink. Now let's get back.

Let's reactivate our crust. It's so funny. The way you describe problem child was exactly the way I describe it. In that I also have said to people that every character there was like a living cartoon character. A hundred percent. And in the center of it is John, who just seems like a nice guy. Isn't that great? It was so, I know. And maybe that was why like people dug it.

But I also think they'll go, tell me if this is true or if I'm making this up. Or just tell me it's true because I'm too old to learn new things. Okay. So I feel like the movie was released in June or something and it was so weird and it made like all this money the first weekend, whatever was a lot in those. And I like 26,000 million, not million. I don't know what money is. So anyway, it made a lot, a lot of money. And then they did this crazy thing where they re-released it in theaters in September. I know

because I went on the Tonight Show with Johnny Carson to promote it. Oh my God, that was so good, so much fun. But, and I think the reason they did that was over the summer, remember this is before everything was everybody and kids were on there for there was nothing right why this all this was orange groves as far as the eye could see so when kids got back in school and saw each other they're like hey did you see that movie no oh i wanted to see it with you they re-released it in september and it did great again because kids wanted to see it with each other. And it made money again. And what I remember,

not only did all of us think it would be a bomb. A dog. But yeah, it was like one of the people at Universal, one of the execs said. What was his name? I forget his name, but he said, we're just going to release this and we're going to treat it like a wounded soldier on the battlefield.

We're going to run and save our own asses. Said that? Yes. We need to have Dugan on to confirm all these wonderful things. Yeah. It was great. He was so much fun. He was these wonderful things yeah it was great he was so much fun he was he was great oh i those are the days huh yeah gil do you feel you earned that

golden raspberry nomination was it from that movie you did i get i i've done so many things we're supporting actor i watched it I watched it again this weekend. I thought you were pretty damn smooth. Yeah. Actually. I thought you were quite natural. Yes. Yeah, but natural for Gilbert.

And I love that Larry and Scott said they were going to up the ante for the second one and write a John Waters movie for kids, which I also love. And the giant, yeah, I like the giant. Do you remember when the little, what was his name? The dog, Spiffy, Puffy,

the little dog in the second, whatever his name was, he gets sick from eating dog food and then he takes a giant dog? Oh i love that part and and does it all i remember that just the way like you played a different character in the second one yeah i they said to me they were originally wanted to write that I was a deranged ice cream salesman. Like a different dude? Yeah, for Problem

Child 2. Like they'd have all the same cast with all totally different characters. So you weren't Peabody at that point. But he came back as Peabody. Yeah, but as an ice cream man, you wouldn't have been Peabody. I wouldn't have as Peabody yeah but but but as an ice cream man you wouldn't have been Peabody I wouldn't have been Peabody I see but uh but I came back as Peabody somehow

as an adoption agency worker yeah I got a job as principal makes a lot of sense of course it does Amy tell but tell us about your first impressions of John, who you met at the table read. But you had seen him before, if I have this right. You had seen him around LA? Let's see. I think there's that story about seeing him at a, was it a pet store? Yeah. At Westside Pavilion, there was a pet store and they had puppies. I'm sure it was a straight up puppy mill, but what did we know in those days? And I remember seeing John in there from afar with one of his kids and they were looking at a Sharpay and John was doing filthy things with the folds of the Sharpay's skin. filthy things with the folds of the Sharpay's skin, which I heard also he had done when he did the Miss Piggy special because her ear looked like a vulva.

And he would like poke his finger in Miss Piggy's ear. Cause it looked dirty. God bless. And you said to me on the phone, you said to me on the phone that you have a bunch of photos. Yeah. And what were we all doing in the photos? Pretending like we were groping each other by having our hands in front. We were doing some special effects that later got some really interesting people like al franken in a lot of trouble but none of us were asleep yes yes i a matter of fact i i may have

been the ringleader on that because that is a famous the famous that is an interesting thing that not famous that i used to do i believe in one picture if I can find this one and I will, and maybe you have a hand over hovering where John's sack and then maybe has a hand, but I'm saying hovering like, you know, in the foreground, but it just looks like, I don't know. It looks like we're all just doing things to each other. But then I realized almost all the pictures that I have of John, some kind of hijinks were up, consensual hijinks. Yeah, I remember. Yeah, I think at home I have one photo of me basically holding John's dick, but he's got his pants on. Or standing behind with your hands around the front like you're groping boobs. Right?

Oh, everything. All funny until somebody gets kicked out of the Senate. And getting back to Emil Zitka. Of course getting back. You didn't hear a damn word I said. Getting back to Emil Zitka. Wait, that's the name of your book. Getting back to Emil Zitka.

Emil Zitka. The life story of Gilbert Gottfried. Getting back to Emil Zitka. Do it. He was... At one point, Mo, after Larry had a stroke, Mo wanted Emil Zitka to be one of the Stooges. Really?

Like the fourth Stooge? Yeah, because, you know, Curly and Shemp were dead. Zeppo and Gummo. And Joe Bessel left. And so he already had, you know, Dorita. And he was going to get Emil Zitka as the third. You're kidding. Yes, and to all of you Three Stooges fans probably already know this.

He was the preacher at a wedding I don't know who's getting married in one of the Three Stooges shorts and his classic movie line is you may kiss the bride you two lovebirds

I love that. That should be, every priest should say that. Roommate kissed the bride, you two lovebirds. Gil, out of 300 plus guests, I don't think we've ever had anybody who worked with with M. Belsitka, except for Amy. Let's see if we can find a picture of us together, shall we? Since you saved everything, you might have one. Do you have a picture where you're grabbing Hamilton's balls?

No, but you know what? I can recreate one. Photoshop is my absolute friend. I have the first thing. I don't know anything about computers except for how to make myself look good, get out of trouble and also, um, you know,

implicate people in sex crimes. Is that all right? Girls gotta live. We will return to Gilbert Gottfried's amazing colossal podcast after this. to play along as BetMGM brings the real-time action. Embrace a season's worth of swings with BetMGM, your one-stop shop for all things baseball. BetMGM.com for Ts and Cs.

19 plus to wager. Ontario only. Gambling problem? Call Connex Ontario at 1-866-531-2600. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. Navigating adulting isn't always easy. You're not just working, you're working late. And dinner dates are all, what's your five-year plan?

And you're thinking, paying off the bill for this fancy pants meal, probably. So when you need to break free from responsibility and experience something that feels more you, reach for Kraft Dinner. Because when you're starved for moments that bring you back to who you really are and what you really love, that's when it's got to be KD. When you got to do you, it's got to be KD. Shop now. Amy, tell us.

I think our listeners would be interested to know your connection. I forgot there were listeners. Yes, there is for you. There are a handful. Tell us about your connection to the Easy-Bake Oven. I don't think even Gilbert knows this about you. No, I did. i saw this in her yeah this is the true thing she was a cover girl well let's not go crazy

let's not go crazy my sister patty who is still smoking hot at i'm gonna say she's 70 and she is but she was a model in Cincinnati, which is a thing, don't, don't even worry about it, and she, somehow the photo, I think goes like this, photographer that she was working with, his next thing, he was going to be photographing the box for the Easy Bake Oven, because Kenner Toys, which was that at that time now bought by, I'm going to go Hasbro. I don't know. It was in Cincinnati where I'm from. So she showed him, she showed him my school picture, which I'd cut my own bangs. And he thought that was adorable. Anyways, I got the, I got the gig and I went at six years old. She came to get me out of class at my Catholic school.

So I'm a country day school. I think she probably said I had a doctor's old. She came to get me out of class at my Catholic school. So I'm a country day school. I think she probably said I had a doctor's appointment. If the nuns had known I was going to do something so busy, they might have grabbed me by the heels and said, no, don't go down that path. And yet I fucking got away. And so then, yeah, I did like a photo shoot. And I got to like be behind the scenes with an Easy-Bake oven. And in the other room is a full-on chef making the things so you know all the illusions and for for those people

out there too young to remember the easy bake oven it was a little plastic oven the size of a bread box and it had a light bulb two 100 100 watt light bulbs that cooked things. But some of it, so what most people did and what I clearly did is, because I look at, I can't cook right now. I have no idea what I'm doing. And I'm the person that like eats the cookie batter. I'm like, that equals two cookies.

I'm fine, throw the rest away. But so people would get the little packages. They'd be like little envelopes and you're supposed to mix it up and kids would just go, yeah. And they basically just eat it like Lick-O-Mate. Do you know what Lick-O-Mate is? Is that a national thing? It was called something else too where you'd have like a little sweet tart

like spoon and you would lick it and stick it in the powder. Like Pixie Stix. It's the same kind of powder as Pixie Stix, yeah. Hey, do you not having to do with nothing what do you both remember those straws yeah where you used to sip the milk oh oh yes yes yes yeah it would have like some kind of powder or something no no there was strawberry and there was chocolate. Yes, of course. So my, so my, so in Cincinnati, the, the, the big, you know, General Electric is in Cincinnati. It's other places too, but also Procter and Gamble. So my dad had this little store.

And even though there were Kroger's and big stores, he had this little grocery store, but somehow they would try out like new products. And my dad, I remember the day my dad brought home like a can of Pringles and we looked at it like it was from 2001 Space Odyssey. Like, what is it? Opened it up and we, everybody like looked at a Pringles potato chip for the first time. We're like, this is, somebody's playing God with potatoes, but it was good. But yeah, we had, we had those little straws. What about the crazy straws, Gil the ones that used to go in in 26 different directions oh yes yes yes milk yeah kids kids today don't know

what they're missing yeah and they used to be that stuff those tablets oh maybe they were fizzies fizzies yeah but yeah you drop them in water and they were allegedly supposed to taste like Coca-Cola. What's that Animal House joke? Who dumped a truckload of fizzies into the swim meet? I've never seen Animal House. Don't tell Jamie Widows. When I see him, I always pretend. You know Jamie Widows?

Yeah. Yeah, he was Hoover in the movie. He was Hoover, and he's also a director. Yes, yes. And can we get to Mel Brooks? It's up to you. This is on your dime. Yeah.

Can you, what was it like working with Mel Brooks? Well, working with Mel Brooks was a dream absolutely come true. That was, that's the thing. That's the thing when I'm like, it was a dream, but also a joke, but a dream. Cause it's like, I,

it just never felt, it never felt real until one time he yelled at me. Oh, it felt so real. It was so great. Why did he yell at you? Oh, because I was,

I, I think I'm a good dancer. Everybody says, and I'm in a dancer, which everybody says you can't dance. And in Dracula Dead and Loving It, also known as Happy Dracula, in Happy Dracula, there was a thing where Dracula and I, Dracula, and I have to dance the Tarantella. I'm saying all these words.

And I had to, we had dance-ins for us, of course, this famous couple, I can't remember their name, I should, they're in the credits, that were famous, like, tango ballroom dancers. And she looked pretty much like me, that was pretty good. But there was a scene where they would cut from her doing this dancing, dressed like me, to me me and I had to do one thing which was Dracula had his like arms out like holding his cape out or something and I was behind him and I had to like look at him in the eyes and then like roll like my head away from him down his arm and I just couldn't do it and Mel was so used to us being really far away, but video village or whatever they call it,

like where he was sitting with all the camera with all the video and stuff was right next to me. So I could hear him saying, Oh, this is how she dances. I didn't expect this. Wait, what? Honey, can you, can you do it do it can you you know what how about just have you and then you go okay great they go have you seen someone dance do you know what dancing you know and I'm like to Rudy DeLuca and those guys and I'm like oh my god but anyway and I'm like I'm trying as hard as I can he goes yeah it's very trying over here too and I'm like I'm sorry but um other than that it was a love fest.

Gil, Anne Bancroft's character in that movie is named Madame Oosponskaya. Oh, wow. I know. That one's for you. Easter eggs everywhere. Easter eggs everywhere. You sent a tape of a Carson appearance to Mel Brooks? Who said that?

Now you're full of crap. You did? I said I sent a tape of a Carson experience. That you had your agent send the tape of your Johnny Carson appearance to Mel Brooks? Oh, you know what? For Men in Tights? I think maybe he did do that.

God, where are you? Oh, I guess I did. Gosh. Hmm. Boy, I've been lying so long, I can't remember. Deep research, Amy. Deep research.

You know what? I'm going to need you someday when I'm in the home. And you go, hello, Ms. Gadsby. I'm going to get there before you. No, I used to work as a candy stripper in a nursing home. And my job was, and I never thought I would need it, but especially now I do. My job would to be, instead of going in and the lovely people who I loved. Oh, I love old people. I love it so much I'm turning into one.

But and they would say, so instead of them going, what day is it? Or what's your name again? You would walk into the room and say, hi, oh, it's Amy. You might not recognize me. I have glasses on today. So nice to see you and then say their name. And it's such a sunny Tuesday for March, isn't it gosh what is it March 17th so you're like giving them all the information so they don't feel like they have to ask for it and I really would appreciate that much much much as a matter of fact that's how Gilbert and I interact now absolutely what about all those old comedy pros wow she's quick hashtag she's quick. Go ahead.

Between those two movies, between the Dracula movie and Men in Tights, I mean, Dom DeLuise, Avery Schreiber, Robert Ridgely, Chuck McCann. Yeah, Chuck McCann. I used to run into Chuck McCann all the time. I can't remember why. In L.A.? Yes, we McCann. We had him here. We had him on this podcast. Okay, go ahead. And Harvey Korman. I mean, what was it like being around these guys?

This is like centuries of comedy. No, but that is 100% when you say show business. That's what I thought show business was. That's all I ever wanted it to be. The Dean Martin, not the roast, the Dean Martin show. There was a girl in my girl, a woman who apparently dated my brother and her name was Patty Pavarnik. And she was from my town and she, she, she was one of the, Oh, they're called gold diggers. The gold diggers. And she

was, I think she changed her name to Patty Pavar. And I remember that she was on. I remember I'm a kid. She was on Happy Days, like one episode of Happy Days. And it wasn't like you go, let's watch it on the DVR. No kids. There was a time before that. And I remember seeing Patty didn't know her, but my brother did. Patty Pavarnik, Patty Pavar. And it was so exciting. And then i think she married marty ingles so shit happens wow before he was married to shirley jones wait not marty ingles i apologize marty hello no not him marty allen wait a minute say this over again i can't she can't repeat it so patty there was a girl in my neighborhood named a woman who was my brother's age who's 12 years older than i am her name was patty pavarnik she went to hollywood we were all excited we heard that she was in hollywood it might have been in the fucking paper either the cincinnati inquirer which is a thing or the northeast suburban news or the blue ash tattletale some fucking newspaper in my hometown

patty pavar change your name to pavar instead of pavarnik because you can and she was on a uh an episode of happy days and then she was one of the gold diggers remember they were like the dancing girls okay yeah and then she married what's his name marty allen no well she might have changed your name but mart Marty was married to Frenchie, whose real name was Lorraine, and then he was married to Karen Blackwell, but he's only married twice. Wait, so who am I thinking of?

I don't know. What was the catchphrase? I think she just fucked him. Huh? Oh, that's even sadder. Well, it wasn't more... It wasn't Marty Allen? It wasn't... He didn't say hello there.

Hello there. No, that's the other guy. That's Marty Allen. That's Marty Allen. Wait, who's the Shapoopy? Shapoopy. Shapoopy. From Music Man.

Oh, Buddy Hackett. Oh, no, it wasn't Buddy Hackett. Who was it? This is a fun game. I know it. Red Buttons was ho-ho. I met Red Buttons. Oh, yeah.

I met Red Buttons. I met Red Buttons. I've met you guys you don't even know. I met Milton Berle, just enough to win. Yeah, yeah. I've met you guys. You don't even know. I met Milton Berle just enough to win. I've met everybody. I, Steve Weber on wings, we would talk and I would say, Oh yeah, I met him at the thing. Oh yeah. And he goes, you are the most famous, non-famous person in the world. He goes, how do you know all these people? I'm like, cause I would just go up to them because I don't, it's not like, Oh, I'm a showbiz person like you.

I'd go up, I'd go, hi, I'm a big fan. And once in a while they'd go, aren't you on that show? Or yeah, well, but most of the time I was just like a fangirl. And then we get to talking. I'd be like, I'm kind of in show business too. But so who do you want to know? I know every, name it. I'll tell you if I'm bad.

Well, you worked with Norm Crosby on. I love Norm Crosby. Oh, Norm Crosby did did the what was it called malpropism yes yes i kind of like leo gorcey used to do that but but let me tell you something so there was a show and it was okay the husband of, was his last name Yarnell? Not Shields and Yarnell. Shields and Yarnell? Oh, no, but I love them. But no, no, no.

There's the, Tony, what's her name? The agent from ICM. Tony, whatever her name is. God. And her husband's name is something Yarnell. Okay. He produced this thing called the New Love American Style. Sure. And the, don't say,

sure. You don't know. Believe me. We do. You do. Yeah. Marsha Wallace was on that show. So,

so, so they would have the interstitials, which on the old one would be like, no way. That's stop. Shut the fuck up. We had on Stuartart margolin yeah he was the guy that did the the blackouts in the old love okay in the old one gilbert listen to me no just just for a second

just pipe the fuck down for a second dara told me i might have to say this. Okay, just kidding. So, but in the new ones, instead of like, it was like, in the old ones, the interstitials were like pushing a brass bed down the street, right? Like all of the, but in the new ones, they were like little comedy bits. Like a joke, beep, bop, bop, beep, bop, bop. Like a laugh-in kind of thing.

So it was, here's who got hired for it danita joe can't remember her last name uh marshall wallace arsenio hall wow me barry pearl you know barry pearl you should and and um what you said norm crosbyrosby. So on two weekends, we did we filmed all of the interstitials so it was just the corniest bullshit. You don't really have to be quiet, Gilbert. Are you mad at me? Yeah.

I was walking out. No, you weren't. I could see you. You fucking dramatic queen liar. So it was crazy because I got to hang out with Norm, with, and then he had said, well, I'm going to be in Las Vegas. If you want to come in and see the act in Las Vegas. And so I went with my boyfriend Jay at the time and we went and Norm Crosby from the stage, he would do

this. It wasn't Caesars. He did this whole big act, but then he worked my name into one of the things. And he's like, and then the pioneers went out over the country. And they set out for their destiny going down the old Yazbek Trail. And da, da, da. Oh, I almost jizzed. He was great, Norm Crosby. He's still around. Oh, he is great.

You're great, Norm Crosby. I love Norm Crosby. You're going to have to yell louder than that. A little louder. I met him a couple of times. Really? He never mentioned you. Yeah.

Should I mention? No, I don't like it. Among these nonsense sound words, there was Maury Amsterdam from Dick Van Dyke. In his act, he used to go yuck-a-puck, yuck-a-puck. Oh, yeah. And what does it mean?

Nothing. Just a nonsense word. About the same as your poopy. Yeah, but in that category. Yuck-a-puck. Yuck-a-pok. Kafefe. Yakupok. I like it. Hashtag Yakupok.

Let's get it going. Let's get it going, people. Is there a story, Amy, about when you and John were on The Cosby Show? Because Gilbert has some information about The Cosby Show. What? More? Can I... More?

More information than has been spoken of course. And by the way, how do you like the fact that he made himself an obstetrician on that show, Gilbert? Yes. Which we've never discussed. I love it. Better than an anesthesiologist, which was the actual. I did an episode of Cosby.

I know. And what the two of the writers told me this, that in his schedule set aside, like for say, you know, 315, an hour was set aside to teach comedy to Asian models. No. Yes. No. That's what I heard. You sure he didn't say agent models? No, Asian models. That's why there are so many

funny Asian models around. That would do it. I don't think he got around to teaching them comedy. Is that real? That's so... How can that be real? Is that real? How so how can that be real is that real how could you have a hard time believing that yeah no that that that no but i mean that the two writers told gilbert that

yeah i believe that's the only thing no a hundred percent okay here's my story do you want me to tell you the whole story please do we have two seconds for me to pee and come right back sure okay here we go and it doesn't mean I'm snorting coke or anything it means I'm peeing goodbye someday I'll tell you the real story of what just happened well we know you peed no you don't know anything

you just know what I told you you told us you peed I No, you don't know anything. You just know what I told you. You told us you peed. Yeah. I'd like to go with that. That's a good story. Okay. All right. I peed off the balcony.

I didn't. Okay. Cosby. I didn't. Okay. Cosby. So, first of all, John was, God bless him, the biggest Cosby fan of all time. When he was at SC, all of this, of course, before I was born. He based his cool wardrobe as Cosby's character on I Spy. Wow. Like with white like with plaid things and white belts and like trying to be cool. He's just and he always thought he was just wonderful. He loves me. And I loved him. I fucking loved it. When I was a kid, but listen, Gilbert, when I was a kid,

we had like a record player, right? And we had like a 45 of like Winchester Cathedral. Oh, yeah. Oh, yes, yes. And then what else do we have? Oh, like the Letterman singing. Well, it's going to be a long. See you in September.

Okay. And we also had what goes up let's come down let's win tears and that's all we had and then we had cosby comedy albums so my whole that was it i just loved and loved him so when john um was asked to come on the Cosby show, they're like, well, do you know anybody that you'd be interested in playing your wife on the show? And he's like, oh, yeah, there's this one person, Amy Yazbeck. Let's not go into how that works. Anyway, so I go to New York. So now we're at the Cosby show. And we ran through it and stuff and it was fine.

And then there was a time before the show on the night of the taping where they said, well, Cosby always likes to have dinner. And he has a big, so there was a chef and there was this big room. Did this happen to you, Gilbert? Or was it just John? Cause he was big star. Oh, he invited to like a little dinner thing before i know so there was a big so there was a big table and there were all these people sitting around it and he was sitting at the you know the the end of it like the fucking king and there was like i want to say miss

colombia miss nicolette something miss teen something there with her parents and they're like we want to take a picture and he pulled her down on his lap and john's just looking at me like ah and she's he's like she's uh i'm mentoring her and i was like oh okay and john and i were just like rolling her eyes like okay let's not get involved i don't know what's happening the parents are here i'm sure it's fine and then on the night before we went on, Bill Cosby said, I have a cappuccino maker. Can I make you guys some cappuccinos? And John loved coffee, but it made him very like sweaty and anxious. And he said, I can't have caffeine.

And Cosby said, that's fine. I won't make it with caffeine. I have all the different things. Okay. He comes back. So he gives me, yeah. He gives me a coffee, gives John a coffee. We throw it back.

And then Cosby comes up in my ear, like right on my shoulder, dare I say Joe Biden style, but I'm going to vote for Joe. But, and he like in my ear whispers, that was caffeine. And I'm like, why did you do that? And he's like, ah, for energy to give him a little bump of energy before the show. And I said to John, before we went on, by the way, this is my first multi-camera show. I had never been on a stage like that before. And I'm with Cosby and John.

I have no fucking clue what I'm doing, but I just said to John, there was caffeine in that. And he said, he's a poisoner. And so we always called Cosby the poisoner. He goes, who does that? That's like if somebody's like in the, in the program and you're like, actually that wasn't a virgin. Yes. So we always called him the poisoner. Crazy. Wow. Once John misread, missaid his line 15 times because he was so fucking high on this caffeine. And I said to John,

you're sweating like a pig. I didn't know that I was miked. I didn't understand how things worked. And the audience heard it and it was all terrible. But yeah, we called him the poisoner. Oh my God. How about that, Gil? That's chilling. But we also loved loved him he did rub my feet in a

weird way once but who knows hey amy i got some questions from fans for you wait how does that work well we had them do it ahead of time we do a thing called grill the guests on our patreon page and we said we had you coming and i want a patreon page here's one that would work okay go ahead here's one uh let's see uh from uh geeter or jeter with a g could you tell us about the raw sexual energy between you and gill on the set of problem child and what did you do to keep from jumping his bones? I think between Problem Child 1 and Problem Child 2, the affair that Gilbert and I had really helped us concentrate when we finally did the Problem Child 2.

We would just look each other, like the knowing look, knowing that we knew where every fucking mole and dimple and hot spot was in each other's body. The fact that John watched. I mean, I don't know. He was pretty progressive. Here's one from Mike Dobson. Would Amy agree...

I hate Mike Dobson. Would Amy agree that the condom scene in Skin Deep... Would Amy agree that the condom scene in Skin Deep ranks as one of the funniest scenes ever in film history? I would say that's true. John had some great moments in that movie. 100% yes. Funnier still in that movie is after he gets the treatment with the electricity and he can't walk straight. OK, but let me tell you something. Let me tell you something, kid.

We were on, John and I were walking on Larchmont across from Paramount, you know, that used to be Orange Groves as far as the eye can see. And a guy came up and he's like, oh oh my God, John, I played your dick. And John's like, I'm sorry, what? I think he said he played with your dick. And he's like, no, I played. So I guess what they did was in the scenes where the lights are off, they had two actors or whatever. I mean, I guess John did that too, but, you know,

to do whatever where they kind of choreographed it, the glowing penis scene, they had actors with glowing phalluses and the lights were off and this guy played John's dick. That's hilarious. So I fucked him. He's very good in that film.

He's very good in the Bogdanovich film. We were talking on the phone about it and they all laughed. Oh, my God. He's got some really great moments. He's playing Bogdanovich in that, you know. What's that? He's playing Peter in that.

I know. I know. And, you know, the glasses, the whole thing. Yeah, no, he loved Peter very, very, very deeply. And I like him, too, in a movie called Hero at Large, which we all urge our listeners to find. Ann Archer. Yeah.

I have so met. And you know what? In one scene, he's actually in a scene and a day player of was Kevin Bacon. So one degree of separation. Oh, there you go. I,

I worked with Peter Bogdanovich. On what? It, I'm not in the final cut it was the worst oh wait wait i just thought of a better name for your book yeah i'm not in the final yeah exactly he was in tatum o'neill's part in paper moon briefly where are you no i i was in i was gonna be in the last Wilder Pryor film. Oh. And. Which was what?

It was called Another You. Yes. And it came out and it sucked to high heaven. But that's a great song. There will never be another you. Yeah. Well, you know the old pop tunes, Amy. There will be other nights like this.

And I'll be standing here with someone new. Or maybe I'll sing another song. There will never be another you. Stop. John was great with his fans, wasn't he? I read an interview with you, and you were talking about how everybody wanted their John Ritter moment. And he had this in common with Alan Alda, that rather than sign an autograph, he would prefer to shake someone's hand and actually have a human interaction.

Oh, no, I know he signed thousands. Plenty of autographs. Go on eBay. Yeah. Plenty of autographs. What it was was when he was with his kids. Uh-huh. Oh, yeah. When he was with his kids, like at Dodger Stadium,

which was his absolute happy place, that was like being in Temple. I mean, you know. And if people came place that was like being in temple i mean you know and if people came up especially if they were like standing and he couldn't see the play but and they would like can i have here because he didn't want everybody turning around and looking at him and he'd say hey i'm just a dad today i'm just being with my kids i'd love to shake your hand i don't know what he would do nowadays i'd love to point to my mask and swear that i'm smiling from everything i read, you know, people would scream Jack at him or people

would... People still call him Jack. Yeah. People call him... Oh, you were so lucky to be married to Jack Tripper and Jack Ritter and yeah, he really, he was that... He, yeah. Well, the other thing is, and Gilbert, you know this, even though

you're a big fancy movie star, there are some people that seem approachable. John seemed and was approachable, I think, because people, it's different now, there's movies on TV. But it was different if you would see a movie star out in the world, I imagine, and you'd just be like, uh-huh. Then when you would see Jack Tripper, who was in your living room with his bouncy titty friends all the time, you would kind of like, then when you would see Jack Tripper, who like was in your living room with his bouncy titty friends all the time, you would kind of like, ah, so people really felt like they knew him and they'd come up and tell him really personal stuff, which was fantastic. And approach him and accost him in men's rooms too, didn't they? Yes. He would, people would be like, like he would be peeing and somebody would be peeing next.

I'm like, hey. And they would take one hand off their dick. I'm not sure how dicks work. They'd put their hand on Jake's hand, and it's like, really? But yeah, I don't know if he did it then. I also found this, Gilbert, you'll find this fascinating, that John was a lifelong fan of Saturday Night Live. Gilbert, you'll find this fascinating, that John was a lifelong fan of Saturday Night Live. But when they asked him to host, for some reason, he was reluctant to do it. You know, they asked him all the time, Gilbert. But you know what the part he was scared about?

What's that? The monologue. Just the monologue. Really? He loved skits and bits and things. But just the, hi, I'm John Ritter. He was so not that guy at all. He never pulled that. Now, I mean, maybe you can talk to people who worked not on any movie.

I was with them. But he had this kind of great reputation of knowing all the crew's name. And he was really good. His kids are like that, too, fantastic i'm an asshole no i'm good he would have been a great host on that show yeah a hundred percent but he could he would sweat bullets like he was on the fucking cosby show matter of fact all the rest of his life when he would do profuse sweating he would point to his forehead and go cosby like somehow bill cosby came in and that's hilarious oh my god i also go ahead go go i was gonna say i love that you got to this is a hero

of gilbert's and a hero of john's as it turns out you guys got to go backstage after damn yankees and meet jerry lewis which was important to john jerry lew Lewis was John's fucking idol. You know, it's funny you say it, because when I would watch Three's Company. Yes, he stole from Hannah and Lucy, and they knew it, and they loved it. There you go. I'd look at facial expressions and crazy look.

Yeah, and I'd go, oh, he's doing Jerry Lewis now he studied Jerry Lewis and if you think if you think about it like in those days it wasn't like Jerry well I guess the Jerry Lewis like show with Dean Martin oh my god when we were together we he would show me every Jerry Lewis thing I loved it but I would like recognize I'm like hey and he's like yeah yeah I kind of do my own version of that but uh was very very cool and his his dad John's dad Tex Ritter who was a singing cowboy Tex Ritter he was like Gene Autry in them as a matter of fact Gilbert yeah John John's dad Tex his moniker was America's Most Beloved Cowboy. And John has a brother, Tom, who John always thought was spoiled and they loved him more.

So I used to call John America's Most Beloved Cowboy's Most Beloved Son's Brother. He liked that. It was long, but it was applicable. But Jerry was good to you guys. Well, Jerry was great to us, but it was There you go, Gil. Well, no, I know he's an asshole. Well, he didn't always have the reputation of being kind to everybody. Jerry Lewis.

No shit. Jerry Lewis I met a few times. And I can honestly use that classic line, which is, well, he was always nice to me. Oh, yeah, me too. Yeah, I get it.

I totally get it. And I've heard so many, many things. And John knew all that stuff. And so when we went to see, when we went to see Dan Yankees and it was with Markie Post and her husband Michael Ross who's writer and actor and we sent a thing backstage

something we sent a bottle of champagne or some bullshit and then intermission somebody came out and said Mr. Lewis would like you guys to stick around the theater afterwards and come backstage to stay. It was like, oh, my God, we're all going to fuck Mick Jagger. I mean, it was like we couldn't sit.

We were like vibrating with excitement. Marky was like squeezing my hand for the whole second half of the show because we're like, we're going to see Jerry Lewis. I'm sure it was good. I remember the times I would uh see him in person it was like oh my god he actually exists in real life exactly and he said so we went up to his thing we saw the thing saw the picture of his dad jerry lewis's dad in his dressing room who he said he did it all for because his dad always wanted to be on broadway and he wasn't he's like there dad i made it there was like some psychology there and then we said well

we're gonna go to Sardi's afterwards which also I'm at I'm me I'm from Ohio I'm me Amy from from Cincinnati all of these words seem crazy this is not me name dropping these are me the whole time going holy fuck how did I get here okay we're going to sardi's after and so jerry lewis is like well i guess i could meet you you know there at some point we're like no way so we went and burst through the door jerry lewis in a plaid car coat you know what i mean by car coat do you know what a car coat is no what is that not a thing is that a midwest thing maybe it's like a coat that you would wear in the car like in the old days the old days of like tin lizzy cars like a big thick wool plaid 23 skidoo coat so he he comes in the place everybody turns around and jerry lewis just

starts doing bits starts kicking people out of chairs putting the chairs up on the tables like he's closing the place you know firing pretending to fire waiters goes over to the wall to where john's john's picture is and like starts like making out with it was the best thing ever and then he like came over to our table making many jokes it's very fun but i was in the bathroom when this was happening so all i know is he came over to the table and he said marky and i were in the bathroom when this was happening. So all I know is he came over to the table and he said, Marky and I were in the bathroom and he said, we're at a broads like a joke, I hope. And John said, they're at.

And so Marky Post and I were on separate toilets, no matter what you've heard in the ladies room at Sardi's when we literally hear coming up the stairs, ladies, ladies room. So that's good. But yeah, yeah, he was always nice to me. But do I know people he was an asshole to? Yeah. Well, at least John got to meet a hero and have a good outcome. And they kept in touch. That's nice. And Jonathan Winters, too. John loved Jonathan Winters and got to meet him. That was a big deal. And Mel Brooks. And Anne Bancroft, who John had the biggest crush on.

Wow. So, John. Isn't it time for you to go to bed? Amy. Both of us. Amy, tell us about your work now with the John Ritter Foundation. That's become your life's work. It's important work.

It's really important work. Here's what it is. JohnRitterFoundation.org, if you want to look at it. When John died in 2003 of an aortic dissection, I had no idea what that was. It was a heart attack, treated him for a heart attack. And, you know, it's everything that's not a heart attack. It's not your heart. It's your aorta. And it's not a blockage. It's a tear.

So there was a lot of fucking up from the beginning to the end. Very sad. And nobody ever said, hey, this could be genetic to me. And so when I, you know, went on Google and was reading stuff about it, I was like, what? And so then luckily I was put in touch with some people, met the real scientists and doctors behind this and the people doing the genetic research. So now there is the John Ritter Research Program in Aortic and Vascular Diseases. It's long, but it's just a genetic research program in Houston that my foundation helps fund, set that up. And just for people to be able to understand that it's not that rare, but it is often mistaken for other things. There's a genetic component. because finally the guidelines were set in 2010 for the treatment guidelines for this. So we took out a little part called Ritter Rules.

And then we just teamed up with a group in England called Think Aorta. There was bad timing for that. So this was like in January, maybe. January, maybe, I sent maybe 12,000 Think Aorta posters to 6,000 emergency rooms around the country. And we were going to be like, okay, doctors, take pictures with the Think Aorta poster and you get a free t-shirt. And it's like, now all hell is broken loose around the world. But when we're back to the world again the world again i'll give you more information on that because it is it's surprising i mean i don't it's like somebody shitty some shitty asshole said to me trying to be a shitty asshole so are you doing this because you thought you

couldn't save john and i're trying to save everybody else? Waiting for me to go, no. And I went, yeah, probably. So who cares? Well, you've turned a tragic situation into something that's going to help thousands of people. Right. There was maybe one gene to kind of look for. And now there are dozens and dozens.

And on the horizon, there'll be 40 different genes that you can be tested for that you will know if you have chest pain or other things. And you go into the emergency room, you go, hey, I have the gene for aortic dissection, and they're not going to kill you like they did John. And if people go to the website, they can see the Ritter rules there and they can educate themselves? You can see everything there. As a matter of fact, johnritterfoundation.org. I talk to a lot of people that go on there for information and people who have had like, because there's surgery for it. Oh, John's brother, Tom. So John died in 2003. And all of the first degree relatives, we behave, they behave as if they have the gene because we don't know yet. But so you get echocardiogram every year, whatever. You should do that anyway, Gilbert, just because you don't know whether you have it.

So in 2007, Tommy goes in for his like annual one of those. And there's an aneurysm, which is how it starts right where John's was. And it started growing fast. And, you know, the quote unquote natural history of whatever genetic predisposition this is, clearly people in their early 50s is when it starts growing. I mean, it's different for every people. So John's brother, finally, we got him up to Stanford where they monitored it and went, no, they got to fix this. And they replaced his aortic arch and he's fine. Wow. Cause your aorta is like that big, uh, uh, like the big, like candy cane shape thing that comes from like when they show like pictures of an anatomical heart and it's got like the three little sprangy things on top. Well, that where it comes off of goes all the way down your body and your heart can be in really really great shape but if it's pumping into a tube that's shredding on the inside you are super fucked so this has become your life's work it it is become my bravo my life's work that and um

selling my ass on um cameo.com. Gilbert, how much do you charge? You got company. Mine is 150. Wow, really? You think you're worth that much? Okay. Yeah, cameo.com. You can get a video shout out.

Can you give medical advice, Gilbert? Mine is, I'm doing 50 bucks and I'll tell you why. I don't know also but then i'm thinking for a couple people i've done a lot of work i've actually like because they tell me like i like this specific scene or i've been like again digging out pictures and like holding them up to the camera of different things. And then I got a lot of free time, by the way. On my iMovie thing on my iPad, iPad, my maxi iPad with wings. Sorry, it's a girl feminine protection situation joke there, which I can hardly remember because, again, 57. But you know what I do? I film like little things and I make like actual little videos.

Plus me. So anyway, that would be worth 150. I'm sure you just go, hi, it's Gilbert Gottfried. Hi-biddy-flippity-blippity. I was that one bird and that other's me. Not a bad impression, Gil. It's not bad. You know what I mean?

Is that what you do? Well, a lot of times they'll ask me to roast them. Really? And I'll get lazy and I'll go, hey, fuck you. That's perfect. That's a roast. Fuck you, never got a dinner, Gil. I love you, Gilbert.

Call me sometime like a real person. Don't make it about show business. He'll never do that. Yeah, never. He'll carry your number around in his wallet for 12 years. Amy, plug the website again. JohnRitterFoundation.org, right? Here's some websites.

JohnRitterFoundation.org. Cameo.com. That's stupid. But more importantly, JohnRitterFoundation.org. But also, I want to do a Patreon. How does that work? Will, explain it to you when we get off mike hi i'm gilbert got i'm gilbert godfrey hey shut the fuck up hi i'm gilbert godfrey with my friend frankadre. He's also my co-host

and I have a colossal fupa, also known as a podcast. Moose knuckle hair out. We'll cut it together. Amy, thank you. This was a blast. I've had it with you two assholes. Wash your hands

and go to bed. Bye. Bye-bye. Oh, that was funny. Who wants to grow up? Who wants responsibility? Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. Who wants to show up at work until you're 93?

Oh no, 90 Now everybody says you're running wild Your teacher's gone and you look probably just like me Oh yeah You're just a kid now, but soon you'll be a king of hearts Hearts Oh yeah, that girl next door might turn into a work of art Some people say and put the boy on trial He's guilty cause he's just a juvenile Whoa, yeah

Whoa, yeah He's just a cheerleader You make us crazy You make us smile Someday you'll grow up boy And we'll change your style First you'll be married With kids after a while And one of them might wanna be a Robin Child, yeah You make us crazy, you make us smile

Someday you'll grow up boy and you'll change your style First you'll be married, then kids after a while And one of them might wanna be a Oh baby, who wants to grow up? Who wants responsibility? Ooh Responsibility Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Outro Music