Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - Bob Bergen and Rob Paulsen

Episode Date: November 25, 2019

Gilbert and Frank talk to celebrated voice actors Bob Bergen (Porky Pig, Tweety, Marvin the Martian) and Rob Paulsen (Pinky, Yakko, Jimmy Neutron) about the loyalty of voice performers, giving back to fans, the generosity of Daws Butler and Casey Kasem and the voices behind Toucan Sam, Charlie the Tuna and the Pillsbury Doughboy. Also, Orson Welles hits the bottle, Mickey Rooney "inspires" Walt Disney, Rob hangs with Rip Taylor (and Jonathan Harris) and 14-year-old Bob cold-calls Mel Blanc. PLUS: "What's Opera Doc?" The genius of Randy Rogel! The outrageousness of Bob Ridgely! Remembering Marvin Kaplan! And Bob teaches Gilbert to do Porky Pig! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Ontario only. Gambling problem? Call Connex Ontario at 1-866-531-2600. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. What if we told you you're already off to a great start with so many ways to squeeze the most out of summer right here? From our largest shrimp skewers ever to a Vietnamese-inspired dish ready in minutes, PC makes any culinary adventure an on-budget breeze. Hi, this is Gilbert Gottfried, and this is Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast with my co-host, Frank Santopadre.

Our guests this week are two of the industry's most gifted and sought-after and passionate voice actors and animation historians. Bob Bergen is a three-time Emmy nominee who could be heard in thousands of TV commercials, promos, games, animated series, and specials. He's voiced dozens of animated features, including Minions, Despicable Me 3, Wreck-It Ralph, Tangled, Spirited Away, A Bug's Life, Monsters, Inc., Iron Giant, WALL-E, and Toy Story 2 and 3. For 20 years, he's voiced Luke Skywalker for LucasArts, Interactive Games, as well as in all three Robot Chicken Star Wars specials.

He's supplied special vocal effects for dozens of films, including Gremlins, Army of Darkness, Bright Night 2, and Honey, I Blew Up the Kid. 2019 marks his 29th year voicing iconic character Porky Pig, and he currently stars as Porky in over 200 new Looney Tunes shorts. He's also voiced Marvin the Martian, Tweety, and Speedy Gonzalez. And he tells us that Casey Kasem was much more than just a pissed-off guy who cursed out his co-workers behind the scenes. Wait. Rob Paulson is making his second visit to the podcast,

and we still haven't gotten over his stunning rendition of Yakko's World. We haven't. The first time around, he's voiced 250 animated characters in hundreds of animated shows, including Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Danny Phantom, The Mask, Jimmy Neutron, Boy Genius, The Tick, Samurai Jack, Rick and Morty, and of course, Tiny Toons, Animaniacs, and Pinky and the Brain, for which he took home a well-deserved Emmy Award. He's also appeared in live-action series like Cheers! Saint Elsewhere! and feature films like Spaceballs, The Jetsons Movie,

and The Ant Bully, as well as over a thousand commercials and dozens of video games. And he once looped a steamy sex scene between Tom Cruise and Rebecca De Mornay. But who hasn't? His terrific and touching memoir is called Voice Lessons. How a couple of Ninja Turtles, Pinky, and an Animaniac saved my life.

Please welcome to the show two men of a thousand voices and two experts who can hopefully explain why the actors in these old Beatles cartoons sounded nothing like the Beatles. I don't know what you mean. The enormously talented

Bob Bergen and Rob Paulson. Holy cow, is there time for more? I was going to say, when you got done with Bob, I was ready to go home because I can't compete with that. Thank you so much, you guys. If only that was true. Yeah, that's just great. Thank you so much, Frank and Gilbert.

Welcome back, Rob. Thank you, sir. And welcome, Bob. Thanks, my friend. Pleasure. Well, I know that Bob, I told Gilbert on the phone that Bob has something very interesting to say. You know where I'm going with this, Bob, about Gilbert's career. And then we'll talk about the Beatles, the bad Beatles voices.

Well, are you talking about... The letter you wrote. Yes. So I wrote a letter to Affleck. And I said, look, you should not be holding auditions. Because if somebody can lose their job by telling a joke, if it's not funny,

don't listen to the joke again. But it just irked me that you lost a job because somebody was offended by a joke. We are all one joke away from losing our livelihood. I mean, I heard, I was a Kevin Hart who said, where's the art of the ups?

Yeah. Everyone is just one joke, one tweet away from set. I'm sorry, we're going to cancel your career in life too. So when they held auditions, I said to my agent, A, I'm not auditioning for this. And B, I'm going to find the address of the corporate and say, look, this man didn't do anything wrong. He deserves this job. A lot of people felt that way. I didn't audition for it. I mean, I think a lot of us, the mutual us,

we won't go after each other's jobs. It's a handshake agreement. Especially in that context. It wasn't about you saying, I'm tired of it, or them saying we're going in a different direction. The circumstances that ended up in that, I think there are a lot of us who do this gig

and we all know, like Bobby said, the tenuous line that we all kind of walk. There are a lot of us who do this gig, and we all know, like Bobby said, the tenuous line that we all kind of walk, and there are a lot of folks in this realm, Gilbert. I'm so glad you brought that up, Frank, because it's important for other actors to hear how we carry each other's water. We really are all in this together, so it's good that you know that.

How about that, Gil? Thank you. Thank you, both of you. How about that? It didn't work for you, but I tried. Well, good that you know that. How about that, Gil? Thank you. Thank you, both of you. How about that? It didn't work for you, but I tried. Well, good for you, Bob. I refuse to audition for it too, Gilbert. Yeah.

For what that's worth. Well, you know a story I heard that years ago when Mel Blanc was in that terrible car accident. Right. They knew they were making loads of money off Bugs Bunny cartoons, so they wanted to make new ones. And they asked one of the other voiceover guys at Warner Brothers, can you do Bugs Bunny? And he said, I can, but I won't.

Right. Bless him. Right. And honestly, that's happened a number And he said, I can, but I won't. Right. Bless him. Right. And honestly, that's happened a number of times when the Simpsons, the cast of the Simpsons started saying, look, look, we need some dough here. Right. Because they literally put that network on the map. And now they are the longest running show in the history of freaking television.

Yeah. So they said, look, we need to to, we need to make a little more Do Re Mi. And I honestly, none of the usual suspects, I don't know anybody who does this at this level who auditioned for it. Nobody. Because we also know that we discussed it well and it's together,

but sooner or later, it will come back. And sooner or later, somebody will say, hey man, the producers decided Rob's asking too much money to be the talking chick, and he's been doing it for 20 years. But we're going to have you. And it's nice to know that all of us are kind of going. Or if it does come up where somebody is working on an iconic character like you were mentioning, Gilbert, about Mel Blanc, I always make a phone call. I'll say, look, here's the deal. I've gotten this piece of copy.

My agent has said they want to have you come in and read for Homer Simpson. Well, I'll call Dan Castellanet and find out. What's the deal? Yeah, you know what, Rob? It's fine. I'm done with it. I've had enough. I'm moving on.

I'm retiring. Or, yeah, it's kind of a money thing. That's all I need to hear. Right. I'm done. That brings me to Bob's story about Dawes, about what was it, Cap'n Crunch? Yeah. Well, I was studying with Dawes.

Yeah. Dawes Butler. And Dawes Butler. The Dawes Butler. And they were a new ad agency. They were going to get a new Cap'n Crunch. They were holding auditions. And I was pissed, and I called Dawes.

And I said, I can't believe they're doing this. I won't read for it. And Dawes said, oh, you know, I'm not going to be doing it anymore because they're getting rid of me, so why don't I coach you? Come on over. And I did a lousy Cap'n Crunch, but he knew that he was out. He was done anyway. He said, look, I'd like to have

somebody I know, one of my students take it over. Isn't that great, though? You guys, I love the fact that we get to have these glimpses. And thank you again for the opportunity because it's really important for people to know how folks behave in Hollywood by and large. We really are, you know, especially in this gig because it's not about how big your boobs are, although you have lovely boobs. Thank you.

He does. They're brand new. Or how tall you are. It's about your pure talent and your kindness and all of that stuff. And here's Dawes Butler, who's going, you know, if I'm not going to do it, I want to see if I can help you do it, young man. Mind you, he also charged, was it $10? Or a handshake. Or a handshake.

I'm telling Gil on the phone about that, Gil. I would have given a handshake, of course. As long as it's a handshake. That's right. That's what's important. That's phone. Yeah. How about that, Gil? I would have given a handshake, of course. Of course. As long as it's a handshake. That's right. That's what's important. That's right. Yeah. Great.

And I wouldn't even include all my fingers on it. Nice. Well, there's got to be some. You've got to save some of it back to do it the next time. I get it. But everybody's a really delightful – everybody. And so I'm so glad, though, Frank, that you did bring that up because we all know how tough these gigs are to get. Yeah. And you guys are a particular fraternity.

We are. Without a doubt. And we all like having new people come in. Inspiring. Honest to God. I love it. Eric Bauza is a good friend of mine. And Eric Bauza, Max Middleman, we have a new generation of brilliant talent.

Kids are so talented. Eric Bauza, Max Middleman, we have a new generation of brilliant talent. Kids are so talented. And they really are a mutual admiration society when we're at a session, watching each other, working off of each other. And there's a new generation coming in that are so good, so versatile, but also just as nice as the Welkers and the Harnells. Yeah, exactly. Trish McNeil.

Frank Welker, I know because he worked on Aladdin. Of course. He was the voice of the tiger and the monkey. Yes. That guy's talent just takes my breath away. It's mind-blowing. And it's so funny about voiceover guys like him and a bunch of others. When you watch a nature special you don't realize you think they're

recording like lions and birds and all this and they're not they're bringing in these guys they're recording frank walker with his head in a bucket yeah they're doing jungle noises did you gil did you get to work with frank uh no no i didn't even i didn't even run into robin williams because it when you do if you ever get an opportunity to work with frank it's pretty freaking mind-blowing it to watch him do his gig and hear the director say frank would you shade it this way or we need the character to you know uh infer this idea and frank will will make that hummingbird as a creature yes yeah and make it sound like what you know you're asking a question as a chimp it's incredible you know i was telling bob on the phone we'd have we'd have had him here

by now but he's a shy fellow he's golfing right now not a self-promoter yeah he's decided which plane he wants to fly today that's fine that's right and and you know what's fun i always think like had aladdin come out a year after it did i mean had it been made a year after it did the only person i think would have definitely been in it was Robin Williams. And they would have had like Tom Cruise as Aladdin, Julia Roberts as the princess. Amen. Yeah.

Amen. In fact, you mentioned in that very kind, prodigious opening. It also doubles as an obituary. I was going to say, you know, if you take that piece of paper and fold it into quarters with my book, you can actually put it under your table to straighten it out. A multi-purpose book. But I've had that experience, Gil, exactly what you're talking about. I did the movie version of Jimmy Neutron, Boy Genius. Made $100 million, got nominated for an Oscar. No celebrities in the thing.

Okay. Then a few years later, I do, as you mentioned, The Ant Bully had Julia Roberts, Nick Cage, Paul Giamatti, Alan Cumming, Meryl Streep tanked. Right in the dumper. Interesting. If you don't have a script. Story. Yeah, a story. You can have Jesus in the main role.

It's just, it's not about face actors. It's about character. I always thought that. Like, you know, these are, of course, talented stars. Of course. Is anyone going to a movie because, you know, Brad Pitt's voice is in it? I don't think so. I mean, the suits do.

They want some kind of a guarantee there's box office, but that's not guaranteed that's box office. And I understand why. Bob and I were talking about this out front. You know, to get—we know that if you and I and Bob Gilbert got on Ellen and we start doing our respective characters, within two seconds, you got them. I mean, the folks working on the show, everybody, everybody would go, oh, my God, that's Iago and that's Porky and that's Yakko, blah, blah, blah. But getting through to them is a different story. And I understand why a producer says, I want Brad Pitt to be the talking monkey and I'll pay him a couple of million bucks and he's going to get on kimmel and uh and you know fallon and talk about it true right you know however you still have to deliver and and when it works it works great now the

incredibles is a totally different story absolutely and and ellen degeneres totally as dory exactly and but you got a great story great script. Ellen's voice is perfect for the part. Her tweaks and her uniqueness and her sense of humor and her vibe is perfect for the character. But just having Julia Roberts being the aunt queen is not going to make it happen. But you know what? Pixar does it well. Yeah. They do it great.

There's a documentary called The Pixar Story. And a book. And they tell a story where they were saying, who should play Woody? So they took a clip from Turner and Hooch. Oh, great. And it was a scene where the dog locked himself in the car. And Tom Hanks is yelling through the window, don't eat the car, not the car. Right.

And they animated that line with Woody. Woody. And they went, that's him. Perfect. That's the personality. And they animated that line with Woody. Woody. And they went, that's him. Perfect. That's the personality. And it works great. But when they find the great celebrity, it is the perfect marriage of character and personality. It's not, they don't go to the mic going, what sound should I do?

What character should I do? They just, they're good actors. They virtually, with the exception of Robin. Right. And Jim Carrey, they virtually always do themselves. That's right. And it has to work perfectly. Yeah.

Otherwise, just having- Albert Brooks. Right. I mean, I can just- But they're wonderful. Buddy Hackett in Little Mermaid. Little Mermaid. Right.

It's just Buddy Hackett being Buddy Hackett. All the time. It worked perfectly for that character. But that's a great point. Whether or not they're celebrities is not the issue. It's the character. And along those lines, it doesn't- I heard you guys say it doesn't bother you when creators put themselves in the cartoons, too, as long as it's somebody like Seth or Brad Bird who brings something to it.

If they want to do it, that's fine. We have no pull, no sway. Sure. is to make ourselves so good at our gig, especially in this environment where they want to hire celebrities to do the next $400 million animated project that comes out, is to be so good.

And nice folks like you have us on your shows. The word gets out. And people, you know, you just have to make them get to a position where the producers say, now I know Bob Bergen can totally do this, but I just want to get Brad Pitt and pay him $5 million to do it.

Because we can compete chops-wise. So it's really nice that we're having opportunities to let people know who we are. And I got to ask, oh, I just got to ask this. Now, was Doris Butler the voice of Droopy? No. He probably did him a few times. Bill Thompson was the voice of Goofy, yeah. And when he would do Droopy, and Jeff Bennett does them this way now too.

He would hold his face out like this just to get some airiness in there. Oh, dear. Oh, dear. And this side of his face would sag a little bit lower. He was drooping. And the other side, because he was also, you know, he was smeet. Right, and the nice thing is that you can have a stroke and nobody would know. That's right.

Exactly. But you'd mentioned both Dawes and Mel. Did you guys ever notice that Barney Rubble's voice changed three times? Yes, I did know that. So here's the story. So Mel Blanc, actually, I think it was actually Dawes. It might have been Dawes or Hal Smith was the original voice of Barney Rubble. But Mel Blanc.

Notice the drunk for yous out there. Oh, sure. That's right. That's right. And Mel did Barney Notice the drunk for yous out there. Oh, sure. That's right. Notice the drunk. And Mel did Barney in the first season of The Flintstones. And he did Barney sort of like this. Hiya, Fred, where's Wilma? Right.

And then Mel was in that terrible car accident. Oh, that's right. And Mel was laid out and Dawes came in. And they said, Dawes, can you play this character? It's the Honeymooners. Do your Art Carney.

Yeah. And Dawes is like, but my Art Carney is Yogi Bear. Yeah. And I can't do that. I've already done that. So he just pitched his voice up. How you doing, Fred? Is that right?

A little pinch higher. So then Mel had a pay or play contract. Oh. And he was on a body cast. And they put a microphone over his hospital bed. And in season two, he came back. He couldn't do this voice. It was established. So he did the voice a little bit lower. What a season two, he came back. He couldn't do this voice. He went back.

It was established. So he did the voice a little bit lower. What a great story. That's great. Oh, is that right? Yeah. Oh my God.

They were in a body cast and they hung a mic over him. Yeah, there's pictures in his book of him like this with Gene Vanderpile and Harry just kind of leaning in talking over the microphone

while he's just in a body cast. And I heard that that mel blank used to travel to children's hospitals on his own to do cartoon voices for the kids not great yeah oh man gilbert i'm telling you we've we've all had that experience and most of the time of course it's on the phone where it's most effective but when it when you're lucky enough to be in a room with someone who's struggling and it's very often. But when you're lucky enough to be in a room with someone who's struggling, and it's very often children and their parents, and man, you start lighting up that character, and it changes everything. It is nothing short of remarkable. I know you've seen this

because you've got, you know, Iago's an iconic character now, but I'm telling you, we are so fortunate because whenever we're in a position where social situation, hospital, party, whatever, and people find out who we are, it's just joyful, period. And I love that aspect of it because often parents keep in touch with us after their children sadly don't make it. Right. Parents keep in touch with us after their children sadly don't make it. And it turns out that some of their fondest memories are of seeing their sweet little baby talking to Porky Pig or Iago or Megatron on the phone. And they'll send me videos of, yeah, my little girl didn't make it, but you just got to know what fill-in-the-blank mentor. It's way bigger than a paycheck. It's astonishing.

It is. That's beautiful. You guys saw the documentary. You're certainly aware of it with gilbert and owen yeah yeah yeah life animated yeah life oh it was so brilliant mr suskind right yes yes yes i was just doing some stuff in new york with the um um autism um shine a light on autism, um, whatever the, uh, uh, autism speaks. And yeah, I had seen, uh, did a life, life animated. And isn't it interesting now how many people we see on the autism spectrum at these conventions that come up? I noticed that. Yeah. Yeah. It's incredible, Gilbert. I, I can't get enough of it. And often children, you know, like 25 or 30-year-old children who are struggling with autism issues, I've had more than a half dozen experiences where a loved one will come up to me and say, here's my brother.

He's about 10 or 12 people down in line, and he's really struggling because often they have issues with stimulus, being overstimulated. But I'll be damned. That young man will stand there, a young woman, and really struggling. But they got to talk to Pinky or Iago or whatever it is that gets them out of their head. And they're willing to go through that and drive hours, stand in line. And they come up and they're shaking. Not from nervousness to see you, shaking from their agoraphobia or whatever it is.

But man, you open your mouth and Iago comes out and it just evaporates. It's freaking magical. And they know my career better than I do. Yes, they do. Backwards. Every episode, they know the time code, they know what you wore at the audition, they know everything. Yeah.

And they're utterly dedicated. And I can only imagine, you know, being a parent, oh my God, if my kid wanted to talk to Iago and I knew Gil was going to be, I would do whatever it took to get my baby there because that person will never forget it. And so, you know, it's just a, it's a cool thing to be part of this do whatever it took to get my baby there because that person will never forget it. And so, you know, it's just a, it's a cool thing to be part of this whole experiment. I love it. It's a nice gift. I was, I was in New York a few years ago and I went to Children's Hospital, you know, just

like, like you. Yeah. I just like to just touch base and do some voices and draw some pictures. And this big chubby guy with a Mickey Mouse shirt comes over to me and he goes, do you happen to do Mickey Mouse? I'm kidding? Yeah. And I said, I said, I don't do Mickey Mouse, but I know him. Yeah.

He goes, my kid loves Mickey Mouse. I said, can I call him? Oh my God. Good for you, Bob. So I forgot that there's a time difference between, it was nine o'clock in the morning, 6 a.m. So I called Wayne and I got Rusi. It was Minnie Mouse. It was Minnie Mouse.

It was Minnie Mouse. They were married in real life. Yes, I remember. I met them. And she said, listen, Wayne's still sleeping. Will he settle for Minnie? I said, hang on for a second. Will you settle for Minnie Mouse?

Fantastic. Mickey Mouse is asleep. And he goes, yeah, that's fine. She goes, give me some time to get some coffee. I said, great. I'll call you back. I'll call her back in 30 minutes. Put her on speaker.

Now, this boy had a deformity of his face and he was in there for surgery, didn't speak. And she gets on the phone and he is just giddy and he's smiling and he's making noises and the parents are crying and I'm crying. And I hung up the phone and I invited the father to my one man show that night because they had left this hospital. Roosie calls me later on and says, nobody knows this. Wayne's not well. Oh, yeah. He wasn't sleeping.

He's not well. I said, let me tell you what you just did for this kid. I'm going back to we're a really generous community. It's just incredible. And the parents and the children never, never will forget it. Never. It's just emblazoned in their psyche. I have had people come over to me showing me pictures of their children who have passed away and thanking me. Amen, Gilbert.

And it is impossible to express, for me anyway, what that means to me. Look, I love my gig and I love making a living, but that's way bigger than a paycheck. You bet. It's way bigger than an action figure or a rating point. It is a deep connection that people make after their children have left, and they will never forget Iago. How cool is that? That's an extra payment you guys get. Yes.

Our friend Paul Williams calls that a heart payment. Oh, God. Absolutely. Brilliant. He's a gas. Yeah, he is. And it's like with Life Animated, where I help a son and his family speak to each other, which I thought, how the hell can I do that?

And you never, in a million years, when you got that gig, would have thought, how the hell can I do that? And you never in a million years when you got that gig would have thought, you know, this is going to be cool. It's Disney. It's a big deal. It turned out to be a very big deal. But, you know, as Paul mentioned, the happy payment or the hard payment. Yeah. You never would have known that. And the fact that we're in this time now where we can do podcasts and nice folks like you can have Bobby and me on and we can share these stories, it's the best part about being successful, quote unquote.

It is the absolute embodiment of paying it forward. And also, it's effortless. It's just joyful. You love it. Don't you guys, in some sense, and we talked about this with Dawes and Bob, don't you want to pay it forward in some ways too? Not that this isn't in your nature, but also because of the mentors that you had. Listen, I had. You guys were properly taught.

Especially Bob. Well, I had people. I had Dawes. I had Casey Kasem. I had people who just held my hand. Yeah. And I was the kid. And I remember saying to Casey, why are you doing this?

And he said, because you're going to promise to do it. Do it again. Do it over and over and over again. It's one of the reasons I teach. It's one of the reasons that we go to, well, listen, before these fan conventions, we didn't even know people watched this stuff. Of course.

You guys are rock stars at those conventions. We knew people were watching because we get picked up, so we knew that we were working. But we didn't know how people were affected. But you've had remarkable experiences with the best of the best. I've been very, very fortunate. But I think we have a very generous community.

But Dawes said to me, I'm sorry, Casey said to me, you are going to promise me that you'll keep paying it forward as well. And I do. And he does, yeah. It's great. But I also enjoy it. What always depressed me is that Mel Blanc was training his son, Noel, to be a voiceover, to take over the family business.

And it never... I don't know that it ever worked. I mean, I've only worked with Noel once, years ago, on a Tiny Toon Adventures. Well, that's okay. So that was his first job is that right his dad died and um noel's got to be close to 80 now easily i think he's in his 80s yeah yeah and i know that i mean i remember i was before i moved to la i was in cincinnati i wanted to be porky pig and i'm turning on the tv and there's mel blank with his son saying my

son's gonna take over and i was like well that, well, that's that. And I think the bottom line is it was his dad's dying wish that his son do this. So I think that this, Gil, the sweet thing is that his dad left us thinking that his son was going to take over. And that's all that counts. For Mel. Yeah. I mean, he had some good voices. I don't know if he had the chops. No, nobody is Mel Blanc.

Oh, my God. None of us are Mel Blanc. It takes half a dozen people to replace him. And even those of us that are consistently working, none of us will ever be or sound a thing like Mel Blanc. He's an original. I'm just, like you said, I think that's the best way to look at it. Mr. Blanc was comfortable

that his son was going to do what he requested. And I never worked with him. And what did Noel do? I don't know. I do know what he did. He ran Blank Communications. And from the 60s on, Noel Blank, Gary Owens, and Mel Blank had a company. And they produced commercials.

Hundreds of thousands of commercials. No kidding. Yeah. Wow. Because I know, Mel, what I like to listen to is the radio classics on Sirius Satellite Radio. Oh, like the Jack Benny stuff? Yes, yes. Good stuff.

Isn't that the greatest when Mel shows up as a car? See, size. See, size. It's just freaking genius, you guys. All you audience, listen to it. It's incredible. These are from the 30s and 40s where Mel was uh was the guy the utility player on jack benny's show and um to this day when when i was a kid and you know watching johnny my hero and mel showed up he'd have johnny on the floor in 30 seconds yeah absolutely and

oh my god it was never not fabulous to have mel blank come on on. This is where I learned how to do Porky, was listening to Mel Blanc on radio shows. Really? Because he had a character called Private Sad Sack, which was Porky Pig. But so many of Mel Blanc's characters were sped up electronically. Yeah, I learned that watching an interview with you. I never

knew that Daffy was sped up Sylvester. Correct. Pardon me, but this is, I mean, Bobby, you know, he's the cream of the crop. Have you ever heard, Gil, how Porky does, because you've broken it down in how Porky pretty much does his thing, right? Yeah. Would you mind explaining that to Gil? The stutter? You want to learn how to do Porky for you guys?

Yeah, yeah. This is cool. This is very cool. All right, so, but you got to take it step by step and you have to count out the sounds with your fingers because if you don't, you will go crazy. So, all right. So, first of all. Gilbert's saying too late.

That's right. Say the word boy. One, two, three. Boy. Good. Now say eh. Eh. Count it out with your fingers.

Eh. Eh. Frank. Oh, I thought it was just for Gil okay boy everybody boy eh eba

eba eba bi eba bi eba bi eh eba bi eh Gil eba bi eh eba bi eh

good eba bi eh boy eba bi eh boy eba bi eh boy no no no don't jump ahead Frank don't jump ahead hurry

now wrinkle your nose so it sounds nasal oh Eb-a-b-a-boy. Eb-a-b-a-boy. No, no, don't jump ahead, Frank. Don't jump ahead. I'm sorry. Now, wrinkle your nose so it sounds nasal. Oh. Eb-a-b-a-boy. Go ahead, Gil. Try it. Come on, try it. That nasal part is awesome.

Yeah, because you know what? Nasal is never going to work for Gil, right? Yeah. I think he came out nasal. This is Bob LaFontaine sitting next to you. That's right. Exactly. So try it with nasal.

Pretty good. Now on the third sound, push it more. Good enough. That's right. Try another word. I'll buy that. Try the word ball. Try another word. A dog. A dog. I'll buy that. Try the word ball. Try the word ball.

A ball. A ball. Isn't that the coolest thing ever? Now, we got the final. Here's the final test. You got to do a whole sentence, and I'll do it first, then you're going to mimic me. Ready?

Yes. A boy played a catch with a dog. Oh, I can't. Fantastic, Bobby. How about that? Isn't that the coolest thing? Fantastic. Could I have a Caesar salad on table five?

But I will, going back to the celebrity thing. That's so cool. I've re-auditioned for Porky six times. Yeah, which is also an important part of this whole experiment. It's not like being a superstar. I don't own it. You don't own it? And if a new producer comes around and says, you know, I'd like to hear him again.

But Bob's killed it every damn time. Well, not every time. I mean, you know. In that gig. My fingers are crossed. But the bottom line is, for Space Jam, for the first Space Jam, I'm at the final callback. Mine is for Space Jam, for the first Space Jam, I'm at the final callback, and they said that they actually have an offer out to Jack Lemmon because he had a real stammer.

Yeah, he did. Yeah, he did. Jack Lemmon. And I said, how can you change an iconic character? That's the thing. It's not about Jack Lemmon. I love Jack Lemmon. He's one of my favorites.

Porky. But the casting director said to me, you know, lots of people have played James Bond. Yeah. It's not the same thing. And that's when I was like, you know, I have no comeback. You can't argue with that. Why Mel Tillis never went out for Porky Pig is also a mystery. No kidding, right?

Well, Mel Tillis, I heard him on a 2020 interview years ago where he said that Porky was his hero. Is that right? He had nobody in show business to relate to him. Porky was his hero. Hey, man. I love that. Whatever it takes, baby. We will return to Gilbert Gottfried's amazing, colossal podcast.

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supports the planting and preservation of Canadian forests through the Miele Forest Initiative. Join us in making an impact today for a better tomorrow. Visit mila.ca to learn more. Okay, you've given us the perfect segue. We're just talking about Mel Blanc, and we're going to ask you guys to indulge us

while we share this wonderful phone call with our listeners. So, Bob, set this up, because Gilbert flipped for it, and it's worth hearing. Yeah, I moved to LA. My dad took a job here when I was 14. So cool. I wanted to be Porky Pig, so I just thought, I'm going to call the guy and tell him, look, I'm here, and I've seen you on TV, and you look like you're at retirement age, and I would love to give you that opportunity.

No offense, you look like you got one foot in the grave. I thought I was being very generous, actually. Before you take a big dirt nap, maybe you'd like to help a fellow Jew out here. That's right. That's right. And I got the phone. You want the whole damn story there, Frank? Give us the Reader's Digest version because it's fascinating.

Well, the Reader's Digest story is that I looked in the phone book and I couldn't find his phone number. And my dad says, you know, because we were from Cincinnati, he goes, you know, Ellie's bigger than Cincinnati. So he traveled from like Pasadena to Malibu and went to the post offices. And he got me a stack of white page phone books. What a cool dad. And I just, I called every blank in the book. And I went from the M or Mel blank. There were a lot of them with Cs?

Oh, yeah. Wow. Yeah. And in the kitchen, I had my of them with Cs and- Oh, yeah. Wow. Yeah. And in the kitchen, I had my little portable tape recorder and with a little built-in mic and I put the phone on,

you know, and I pushed record, ran into my parents' room, called the first number. I'm calling for Mel Blanc, the cartoon guy, wrong number, sorry, bye.

Went over, hung up the phone. Jesus. And I went through the whole book and I couldn't find his number. And then I thought, well, maybe it's under

his wife's name, which was Estelle. And I knew that. And I found E Blanc in the Pacific Estelle, and I knew that. And I found E-Blank and the Pacific Palisades, and I got him on the phone, and I recorded it, and I kept the recording. It's up on my website.

We're going to play it. Hello? Is Mr. Blank there? Hello? Mr. Blank? Yes. My name is Bob, and I'm interested in doing voiceover cartoons. Yeah. And I was wondering if you'd give me any advice on how to go about it. How did you get my number?

Well, that's a funny story. I used to live in Cincinnati, and I saw a show called Wonderama, and you mentioned your wife's name was Estelle. Oh, yeah. And I was looking for your name in the phone book, and I saw Mrs. Estelle, and I just figured that was your wife. Yeah. Tell me, have you created any voices? Do you just do impressions or impersonations? Well, I've got one voice.

It's hard to understand. Yeah. Um, I can't... Let me tell you something in the first place. Every voice must be understandable to be in a cartoon. Uh-huh. Because if they can't understand you, it's like, uh, you will never get away with this, Donald Duck.

Yeah. And the other character has to repeat what he says every time he says something. So that's not good. Yeah. You know, it's a small animal. You have to tighten up the invertebrate. Do this with all the animals you see. And dialect. I should work on dialects and stuff like that. Well, dialects aren't as important as the creation of voices. But when you were working in a studio, did they tell you when you were doing bug spying, did they say, say, what's up, dog, and talk like that? Wow. I think it's tough, like bugs probably have to give a tough voice. And so on and so forth. So... I tell you, it's not an easy business to get into. How old are you?

Fourteen. Fourteen? Yeah. Well, it takes an awful long time to get established. Did you need an agent when you started out? Uh, yes. Did you? Well, at the time I didn't, I went to pay a year and a half to get an audition.

Oh, did you? If I would have had an agent, I could have gone in much quicker. Because I called Walt Disney Studios and I told them, I'm real gutsy, and I said, could you use a guy to do voices for our team? And they asked me to do some voices, and I did Woody Woodpecker, and they said

it's pretty good, but they don't give you any animation. Alright, you have to let me just tell you what happened at the end. My mom and dad were out. I had signs everywhere all over the house, in the garage, outside by the mailbox. Don't hang up the phone. I'm talking to Mel Blanc. My mother comes in and hangs up the phone. God bless you.

That's a piece of, like, that should be in the Library of Congress. That's a piece of, that should be in the Library of Congress. That's a big deal. It's also illegal. I know. You're not allowed to do that, but it's been over four years. Oh my God, but it was so charming. And your voice as a young boy

sounded almost like a character. Yeah. Hi, Mr. Blanketsmith. Can I tell you, do you own a weapon? He says, tell me, have you created any voices? And my first thought was, I do this pig.

But I just thought that would be kind of rude to go there at that point. Looking at this recording now in the historical context, he would have no way of knowing. Imagine that he was talking to someone who would succeed him. He's doing one of his most famous voices because you're only a 14-year-old kid on the phone. And he also, he goes, it's a tough business to get into. And I'm like, okay, screw that. Do you need an agent?

You know, I'm like, just tell us how to do this. Whatever it takes. Yeah. And I think that's a really cool thing because there are a lot of us, you know, I should say, not everybody has the good fortune

to know what drives them when they're 14. Whatever the it is. Right. Whatever it is. It could be working in a flower shop or being an actor. Man, if you're gifted enough to be, or blessed with the passion at 14 and say, oh, dude, I know exactly what I want to do. That's pretty cool.

The first time I got up on a stage, like an open mic night, I was 15. Yep. There you go. And you knew it, right? And it's like a drug. Yeah, exactly. It is. It's once, like they say, first one's free, baby.

And after that, man, you're done. And it really, it's not about, you don't care it takes time to get an agent. You don't care I got to drive here from Michigan. But you've got to do it. You've got to do it. Yeah. And, oh, my goodness. What an experience, Bob.

That's so cool. Chutzpah. Chutzpah, Bob. A 14-year-old. Yeah, a little bit. Chutzpah. Yeah. And you recognize Mel Blank's voice the second he says, isn't that Gilbert?

You nailed it. Same thing. I worked with Mel twice. And just his, like you said said listening to this phone conversation oh my god that's that was the great man that was him yeah i worked with him twice and once i got to speak with him and we were working on a jetsons project he's probably 79 yeah and gordon hunt the director said hey robbie you want to sit next to mel and of course and i i mustered up the courage you know to make small talk and i finally said mr blank i am i'm mustered up the courage to make small talk, and I finally said, Mr. Blank, I'm sorry.

I don't mean to be a bother, but if it's not too much trouble, would you? And he knew exactly what I wanted, and he just looked at me and said, and what's up, Doc? And it just blew my mind. That's all it took. That's fantastic. And what's up, Doc? Four words, and it was instantaneous. Now, there's an amazing story. When Mel Blanc was in a coma, they kept saying, you know, Mel, Mr. Blanc, Mel.

He wouldn't answer. After the car accident. Yeah, after the car accident. Laurel Canyon, I think. Right, right. Sunset, sunset. And the doctor said, can I speak to Bugs Bunny, please? And he answered as Bugs Bunny.

Isn't that crazy? Yeah, they did a revival of This Is Your Life back in the 70s. And I think it was Mel's doctor from UCLA was on saying, yeah, he just, you know, Mel was in a coma. And he got an idea to say, hey, Bugs Bunny, are you there? And then he tried Porky Pig, and then he tried Daffy Duck. And Mel responded. The characters came back before Mel did. Isn't that nuts?

Isn't that wild? It is. And honestly, God, you guys, because of this new time in which we live and we can go to all these conventions, I mean, they're springing up like zits on a 12-year-old everywhere. And I'm so glad they are because we get to see firsthand what Gil was talking about with respect to life animated. We get to see it and have people literally, they don't care what we look like, but as soon as Porky starts talking, oh, my God. People often get tearful, you guys. Yes.

It goes beyond entertainment. It's crazy. I had a guy come up to me on a plane once saying how his son, and he said, was a tremendous fan of yours. Oh, Jesus. And he said, so seeing you is making it, makes it better. And then he's, I see he's wearing a pin that is obviously his son. Yeah. And he affectionately pats the pin and goes, well, getting better.

Right. Isn't that something? It's amazing. It truly is. Maurice LaMarche, who's my friend, the brain, and I were a couple of years ago at an event in Dallas. And what I love about this whole experience is that it's not about age. It's not about money. It's not about religious affiliation.

It's about nothing but pure and utter joy. religious affiliation. It's about nothing but pure and utter joy. And a big fella, probably 6'3", 6'4", 2 1⁄4", tatted out, long ponytail, finally makes his way up. And I said, hey, God, you're the big one, aren't you? And he started to get tearful. And I said, oh, God, I'm sorry. He said, no, Mr. Paul's not.

I'm so sorry. I don't mean to be. And I said, no, Jesus. Was it Bill Clinton? No. I'd like to show you something I'm really proud of. I'll thank a lady. We like to offer Lady Tipperillas.

I give them cigars. That sweet girl from Beverly Hills, and she done screwed every one of them up. I bet it was. No, it was not Bill Clinton, but thank you. And this young man got very tearful, and we started chatting. And it turned out that he had done two tours of duty in afghanistan and you know it was in combat and he said you just will never know man we you know and i'd go out on on patrol and do my job which was to essentially kill the bad guys and not get killed yourself

something that i will never have any concept of what that's like then he and his buddies go back have a couple of beers when they you know chill out for the couple of days that's like. Then he and his buddies go back, have a couple of beers when they, you know, chill out for the couple of days that they're off. And they watch Pinky and the Brain. And they watch Ninja Turtles, Looney Tunes. And of course they also watch TV things, you know, regular live action.

But just hearing Pinky and the Brain speak to this veteran. This escape. Yeah. He got tearful. Yeah. I mean, it's incredible. How did, how did Pinky's voice, and this, and you've been asked this question a million times,

how did you arrive at Pinky? It was, you know, just like we all do, throw stuff against the wall. Animaniacs was a protracted audition piece because everybody knew that it was Mr. Spielberg and lots of music and all that stuff. So it took a while and we just tried

a bunch of different stuff. My heroes when I was a kid were Jonathan Winters, Peter Sellers, Red Skelton, Carol Burnett, the usual gang, you know,

Foster Brooks. Foster Brooks. Bless your heart, Rob. Yeah, Jesus. I just love it. Anyway, so we all played with voices um but for whatever reason uh as it dwindled down i must say that maurice when he walked in it was a fait accompli as soon as he opened his mouth and they put orson wells with that picture

of the brain and the giant brow and all you know that yeah Yeah. Modeled after our friend Tom Minton. Yes. That's right. Tom Minton. Who I had the honor to work for. Totally. Great guy. And they just said, well, we can cancel the rest because we got the brain. Did he come in with that or did they say, can you do your Orson Welles? I think Mo looked at it and said, oh, I think I got something.

Was Maurice just walking around doing this Orson Welles impression? Well, he still does. You know, Mo, of course, we know Maurice was a successful stand-up and was in that Rodney Dangerfield. Right, he is, yeah. All that stuff. But he did such great impressions, and it just fit like a glove. And so I threw a bunch of different stuff in, and we mixed and matched,

and finally they kept saying, you know, that kind of weird Cockney vibe that you're doing works really well with the brain. And they would try it, you know, that kind of weird Cockney vibe that you're doing works really well with the brain and they would try it, you know, write a script and have it go back and forth and I would,

basically it was the Pythons and Peter Sellers who inspired that. So you were paying tribute to some of your comedy heroes. And totally. And up until then, every Orson Welles

was always like that. Yeah. And then to hear that. Like John Candy's Orson Welles was always like that. Yeah. Yeah. And then to hear that. Like John Candy's Orson Welles was like that. Yeah. And to hear that

and you go, oh my God, that's the voice. I love that he looped Vincent D'Onofrio in Ed Wood. Yes, in Ed Wood. And when you see

Vincent D'Onofrio playing a young Orson Welles, it's Mo. Is that right? Yeah. Yes, sir. But what's also great is that we love the fact that we can do this gig and people are so versatile.

Mo's been the voice of Toucan Sam, which was a Paul Freese gig. Yeah. He's been doing it for 30 years. Probably longer than Paul did. Yeah, I think. Paul Freese doing Ronald Coleman. That's right. Doing Ronald Coleman.

That's right. Follow your nose. We can all do that. There's a far better thing I do Coleman. That's right. Doing Ronald Coleman. That's right. Follow your nose. We can all do that. There's a far better thing I do now. That's right. But also our buddy Jim Cummings is Winnie the Pooh, Tigger, the Tasmanian Devil. He's another crazy talent. Oh, my God.

And Ray the Firefly and Princess and the Frog sang those great songs. Such a good singer. Oh, my God. That's right. And the problem is he sang those great songs. Such a good singer. Oh, my God. And when Paul Freese was speaking about, you know, was Boris Badenov and so many other great characters, but he was also the Pillsbury Doughboy. Yeah.

These guys are just so talented, and they're utterly different. It's remarkable. And what gets me is there was a voiceover guy I knew named, you probably have met him, Len Maxwell. Oh, yeah. Do you guys know Len Maxwell? I remember him. He used to do the Hawaiian Punch. Oh, that's right.

Of course. Yeah. How about a nice Hawaiian Punch? How about a nice Hawaiian Punch? And I remember, because he did all these different character voices, and I said, do you just do a regular voice? And he goes, I've got about 10 regular voices. Yeah. And they all sounded like he wasn't putting on a voice.

That's the magic. But that was Paul Freese. Paul Freese was the same too. And you go to Disneyland and the Haunted Mansion, and Paul Freese opens his mouth, and it's just incredible. And Herschel Bernardi was Charlie the Tuna. There you go. Yes, yes. Very good. It's just incredible. And, you know, Herschel Bernardi was Charlie the Tuna. There you go. Yes, yes.

Very good. It's just all so cool. And our buddy Arnold Stang, remember on Top Cat? Oh, my God, yeah. He was doing the Phil Silvers imitation. That's right. And Marvin Kaplan, who we had on this show. Sorry, Tacey.

How old is Marvin? Oh, he's gone now. He passed away. He passed away a couple of years ago. He was terrific. Really? Oh, and Lorenzo Music. Oh, yeah.

We were very good buddies with Lorenzo. And what was so charming is that Lorenzo, he knew he had one voice. He did, yeah. But I remember auditioning with him for a Knott's Berry Farm Halloween radio spot. Right. So he's supposed to be the Knott's Berry Farm. Hi, welcome to Knott's Berry Farm. How can I help you?

And I'm playing like a Dracula guy. He'll do bobbing for blood or whatever it was. Okay. So we get done and we're getting ready to leave. And it was so great. Lorenzo says, hey, Rob, do you mind if we switch characters and I read for? Well, no, if the, you know, casting. Sure.

So we switch and I say, hi, welcome to Knott's Berry Farm. I'm here bobbing through blood. I mean, it was just. Just doing Lorenzo. Totally did Lorenzo. It wasn't Dracula. It was Carlton the doorman. Did you ever hear Lorenzo's demo?

Yeah. Lorenzo's demo was literally two minutes of different commercials of him saying hello in different ways. Yeah. Hello. Hi, honey. Hi. Oh, hi. Hi there.

Oh, hello. Hi. Hello. That was it. Pretty good comedy writer, too. He was the Kentucky Fried Chicken of voice guys. That's right. He did one thing, but he did it so well.

And he was, you know, but of course he made all his money producing and writing Mary Tyler Moore. And Rhoda. Rhoda. Good writer. I remember when we had Marvin Kaplan on the show, the first thing, we spoke to him on the phone first. And the first thing you recognize that voice immediately. A frisbee in the great race. Right.

Yeah. You know, he obviously didn't understand like podcasts and anything. And he goes, do I have to dress up for it? Bless his heart. That was really good, Gilbert, because he was the embodiment of the nebbish, right? Yes. The sweetest man in the world. I'm afraid I think I dislocated my scapula putting on my slipper.

You know, just, I just, I love shit like that. What about some of these other names? Because we were, Bob and I were talking on the phone. He said he worked with the great Howard Morris. Oh, yeah. Yeah. And Hal Smith's name already came up. Hal Smith.

Dave Madden. I mean, Howard Morris was part of your show of shows. Sure. Your show of shows, Andy Griffith's show. Oh, Jesus. I worked with him as he was a director. I never worked with him as an actor. Was it called Monster High?

Monster High. Yeah. Very good. Monster High. Bob Ridgely. Oh, my God. Oh, yes. We love Bob Ridgely.

Terrific. The hangman in Blazing Saddles. Yes. Doing the Tower of London. Doing the Tower of London. Doing the Tower of London. So my very first- He was so naughty. And I loved him.

My first commercial ever was for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Ridgely? Shut the front door. Do people know that you're one of the tribe? So I walked in and Ridgely walks in with a dog, and we're on phone patch with Utah. And Ridgely walks up to the mic and says, hey, any of you Mormons want to fuck my dog? And there's a long pause. So Bob.

There's a long pause, and over the phone I hear, who said that? And the engineer in LA says, that was Bob. And I went, Ridgely, that was Ridgely, that was Bob. And I went, Ridgely. That was Ridgely. Ridgely. Not Bergen. Ridgely. Got a little Pat McCormick in him.

Pat McCormick, same way. I remember seeing Pat McCormick at the voice caster and somebody had asked him while I was there and it's a true story. I'm sure he told it to me about what was the best

Carnac response that didn't make it. The answer is cock robin. Cock robin. And they open the envelope and it says, what is that in my mouth, Batman? Isn't that something? And Pat McCormick's holding court and telling that. And then, I swear to God, another time I walk in, it was like being in Broadway Danny Rose. Remember Johnny Hamer?

Oh, sure. Johnny Hamer was the guy in Annie Hall who's doing the best. In Annie Hall. You folks look wonderful from here. Exactly, Frank. This is why I love your show so much. Because you guys, what we're talking about. So I walk in, and I had literally watched Annie Hall like two nights before, and I see Johnny Hamer.

And I said, oh, my God, Mr. Hamer. Hi, my name is Rob Paulson. I am such a fan. I got to tell you, sir, I just watched Annie Hall the other night. And before I finished, he goes, oh, you mean, hey, the room looks wonderful from here. Oh, wow. And he just went right into it. These guys are on.

You push the button. Oh, my God. He was Zale in MASH, too. Yes, he was. Sergeant Zale. Somebody who knew Bob Ridgely said to me that, like, the way he had that weird ending where he winds up in prison. Oh, in Boogie Nights. In Boogie Nights. Yeah, crying. had that weird ending where he winds up in prison oh and boogie nights crying they said had bob richly lived longer that would have been how he would have probably without a doubt listen

i remember my wife and son and i were heading down to san diego on the train because it's a fun thing to take the starlight you know coast starlight. So we go down there and it was four o'clock and five o'clock in the afternoon on a good Friday, going down for Easter. And I said, I'm going to go grab something, but I have to, honey, I'm going to go get some food. I got to walk through another passenger car to get to the food car. And you guys, I opened the door

to walk through this passenger car and I hear this booming, there he is, Patty. His wife's name was Patty. There he is, Patty. There's the young man I was telling you about with the enormous package. Young man over here, over here. And it was freaking Ridgely standing up on a jammed passenger train screaming about me and my package. I didn't know he was on there.

I was like, oh, hi, Bobby. Oh, my God. He had such hubris. His mind. His mind. Oh, and very quick. And you're right. He had such hubris. His mind. His mind. Oh, and very quick. And you're right, Gil, because today, oh, bless his heart. We have a casting office here called Voice Casters, which we don't go to nearly as often as we used to.

But we would go there, and, you know, you're finished reading. Oh, yeah. But there's Ridgely and Jack Angel and Danny Dark and everyone holding court, and you're like. Pat McCormick. Oh, my God, exactly. Just a house. Jack Angel and Danny Dark and everyone holding court. And you're like. Pat McCormick. Oh, my God. Exactly. Jack Riley and that group. Everybody.

Somebody I never worked directly with, but I was in a voiceover with, was I did this thing. They did like a new tiki room thing at Disney. So I did, you know, a Yago. they did like a new tiki room thing at Disney. So I did, you know, a Yago and then for another bird there and I never met him, unfortunately, Frank Ravencroft. Oh, Thorough Ravenscroft.

Thorough Ravenscroft. Tony the Tiger. Yeah, he was Tony the Tiger. Yeah. What a voice. And he was also the guy that said, you're a mean one, Mr. Grinch. Thorough Ravenscroft was the voice of Tony the Tiger almost until he died, like into his 90s, right?

I think so, easily. It was incredible. And he's another one of those guys that you see him and you go, oh, that's an interesting looking guy. And then he says, you know, they're great. Oh, my God. Just mind-blowing. But what a set of pipes on that guy. What about these other actors?

Dave Madden, Henry Gibson, Ruth Buzzi, Bill Daly. I know you guys worked with these people. Hannah Barbera, I worked with every one of those people. Every single one. And they all had a blast doing cartoons. Because they were, you know what? It's wonderful for young actors to hear this. Every one of those people

was grateful to work. Mm-hmm. That's nice. Period, end of story. Because Dave Madden, to me, was, you know, the manager,

Ruben, I'm the partner. Ruben Kincaid, yeah. And I remember having an experience with George Hearn. Now, to me, you know,

I love Broadway stuff. George Hearn won Tony's for La Cage and Sweeney Todd. And here's a guy who's the toast of Broadway. So I'm working at Hanna-Barbera and I walked in, I think it was Smurfs or something. And I thought, oh my God, George Hearn's here today. So we got to know each other. We chatted.

He was a lovely guy. And I finally asked what I wanted to ask was essentially, what the hell you doing right right and so what a lesson he says uh well let me tell you something rob uh firstly i did uh sweeney todd with angela lansbury and angie's now doing murder she wrote so she's got me out here to do a three episode arc for which i'm very grateful And then Gordon Hunt, who's directing the cartoons here, good friend from theater. And I'm happy to be here. And I said, well, it's a pleasure. And we're so grateful that you, you know, I'm so grateful that you took the time. And he let me say my piece. And he said, look, here's how it works. I've won a couple of Tonys. And so I can't take just any gig on Broadway because I, you know, so I have to take a big gig. I have an apartment in the city and a home in Connecticut and I need the money.

So it never stops. I am, it's a cool thing for actors to hear about Henry Gibson, Ruth Buzzi, all these people who became cultural icons in the 60s. Gary Owens. Yeah. Who knew every story in Hollywood.

And they just needed to keep working. It doesn't stop. There are very few Brad Pitts in the world, you know? And these were not the days of $20 million for a movie. They were grateful to be working, man. Some of those people hadn't had a gig since Laugh-In. That's right. That's crazy. And the person

you met in an audition, Bob, was Orson Welles. At my first audition. What? First audition. Orson Welles. Dude! My first audition. I was sitting at Don Pitt's office, and Don Pitt was a talent agent, and in walks Orson Welles, and sits next to me, and I'm

looking at my script, and he sits next to me, and he smells like cigars and curdled cottage cheese. Oh, man. And then your line is, what, in give-up show business? Right? And I could tell that he was rather moist because I could feel his essence next to me. But he looks over at my script. Moist.

I'm not Mo, but he looks over at my script and he goes, I believe we're reading together. Would you like to rehearse? Oh, my God. And I went, oh, yeah. What? I would love to rehearse. We go out in the lobby and we run through it and he goes,

that'll do. And we go into the booth and the booth is the size of this chair with one mic, not two. No, and you're standing next to a Petri dish. Well, we're facing each other because that's the only way we could both be on mic. And his stomach is on mine. Man, what a story. When we're done, there's a round circle of sweat on my stomach.

And I'm like, I will never, ever wash this shirt again. I've got Orson Welles' DNA. You probably have to throw it out. It's a hazmat. Right? Right? Exactly. I love that.

Fantastic, Bob. Have you guys seen the videos? Mo's got them. The videos of Orson Welles doing the Paul Masson. Oh, yeah. It's wonderful. He's utterly tanked. Absolutely.

And I just, I love those. Because Mo does it. Nah, the French champagne is long been celebrated. Was Wells aware of Maurice's impression of him? I don't think so. I don't know that Moe ever met Orson. Okay. But to this day, you know, when Moe and I are together and stuff, I always compel him to do the, we know, remote farm and Lincoln

Street and Mrs. Buck. It's just perfect. It becomes a falsetto voice in those moments where he goes, oh, the French. Oh, it's just genius. And those poor kids, you know, these young actors going,

oh my God, I'm going to call my parents. I'm working with Orson Welles. And, you know, they're waiting for the cue and the director and action. And then there's like 30 seconds. Isn't he supposed to say something? No. You start and the kids waiting to pour the wine. Oh, my God.

It's just genius. Whose idea was it to take the infamous We Know a Farm where Mrs. Buckley lives and turn it into a pinky in the brain? Was that Ruger? Yeah, I think it was. And it was essentially like a $400,000 in-joke because we came to work that day, and it turned out to be a really very sweet circumstance. Mo had literally just come back from Sam sam kinnison's funeral they were very good pals and um so he made it to work and we all knew that he'd had a tough day um and so we didn't he had we had not uh they the producers had not sent maurice the script so we were doing our you know open mic checks and stuff and maurice started to read it and and it was like oh my god wait a minute this is this is the the commercial this is the thing and and it was almost

verbatim with the exception of the you know the nine words and it turned out great it just turned out great it's a brilliant piece of work oh it's fantastic he must have just loved oh he did he just sucked it up it was great i i remember uh the day that uh sam kinnison died i was over at some manager's office some big man i think it was uh kinnison's manager and the girl was looking through her files and she took out a card and tossed it into the trash saying well we won't be using this one anymore and and i reached in and it said sam kinnison on it oh dear boy that's what a metaphor for hollywood yeah all right let me throw two more names at you guys people that we lost fairly recently carol channing and rip taylor I worked with them both on The Addams Family. I didn't work with her. I did an animated version of

and John Astin. I did an animated version. We had John here. What a delightful guy. Sweet guy. And I did a, they did a 13 episode series of The Addams Family for Hanna-Barbera and Mr. Astin played Gomez.

Grandmama was Carol Channing. Rip Taylor was Uncle Fester. It was unbelievable. And then, so they brought in these characters that played next-door neighbors, a la The Kravitzes on Bewitched, right? Yes. I don't know what the hell's going on in that house. And it was me, and my wife was played by Edie McClurg. Oh, yeah. Another talent. And it was me and my wife was played by Edie McClurg. Oh, yeah.

Another talent. And check this out. This talk about great showbiz trivia. The actor who played our son was Dick Beals, the voice of Speedy Alka-Seltzer. Oh, wow. Remember on Davy and Goliath?

Wow. The voice of Davy. Wow. And Dick Beals, who played my son, was my parents' age. As you may recall, Dick Beals was just a small person, right? Born in 1927. And he spoke like this his whole life. When you hear Davy and Goliath, Davy, Hal Smith was Goliath.

That's right. And Davy was Dick Beals. And Speedy Alka-Seltzer, Dick Beals. So here's a great story. Talk about being an enterprising young man. Dick writes a book called Perfect. Think big. So we get to work and Dick has a few books.

And he said, I'd just like to tell, thank you all very much. I've written a book and you're all, I'm really proud of this. My association with Hanna-Barbera. Rob, would you like a copy of the book? said oh my god mr beals thank you so much and so he signs me to rob you know good luck always dick beals so i take the thank you so much dick turn to walk away and that that'll be that'll be 10 50 oh get out of here serious as a heart attack attack. And I said, right? And of course, I wasn't going to, I wouldn't get an argument. Do you take credit cards? Check this out. So I said, oh, of course, Dick. So smart guy. He's already signed it,

right? And I said, I'm so sorry. All I have is a 20. Well, that's okay. I've got change. have is a 20. Oh, that's okay. I've got, I've got change. Genius. I know what I'll do. I'll sucker the kid in. I'll make him feel good. I'll sign it to him and then I'll hit him with it. You owe me 10 50 son. It was great. What about you at the Christmas parades, Bob, the work in the grandstand, you met Jimmy Stewart, Mickey Rooney. Yeah, I did for about 10 years. I was the grandstand announcer for the Hollywood Christmas parade. You You are a walking, you're a history book of Hollywood, Bobby. All these things we didn't know about, Bob. Well, it was pretty cool. I mean, my first year, Jimmy Stewart was the grand marshal.

And I'm down on the street with the moving cars. And ladies and gentlemen, Jimmy Stewart. And I give him the mic. And he's got me by the arm. And the mic's on a cord. It's before cords with mics. and he's got me by the arm. And the mic's on a cord is before cord is mics. And he's just talking. He goes, yeah, I'm here and Gloria's here.

And it's a wonderful life. And Harvey's here. And, and I'm starting to lose the slack of my cord. Because the car is moving, right? The car is moving. Mr. Stewart, I'm losing my, Mr. Stewart, I'm losing my, I dropped the mic. He's got me by the elbow. He's got a death grip on my elbow.

And I'm walking. How old was he at this time? 106. And I'm walking down Sunset Boulevard towards Highland. And I said, Mr. Stewart, you're talking to me. You're talking to nobody right now. It's just you and me. Yeah, yeah, it's you and me and Harvey and Gloria.

Pretty good. What about Mickey Rooney? Oh, God. Mickey Rooney was, I mean, I loved Mickey Rooney. He's one of my all-time favorite entertainers. But if you look up bullshit. Oh, yeah. I mean, he tells me, he was, you know, when I was a little boy, I sat on Walt Disney's knee.

Yeah. And he said, Mickey, I'm going to create a cartoon character after you. Oh, dear. So Mickey Mouse was him. Well, that's what he says. And the world according to Mickey Rooney, which none of it is true. Right. But God bless Mickey Rooney.

Oh, my God. He just needed to know that. I heard a story that Mickey Rooney, he was doing a show somewhere, and his big thing, and this was like all the workers would gather around, hey, Mickey's doing it again. And Mickey would be on a wall phone, and he'd be like fucking some chorus girl against the wall while talking to his wife over the phone.

Oh, my God. Well, I have to say that, by and large, I have to say I've never heard good things about her. No, no. You won't on this show. Yeah. I just want to know, did Mickey Rooney record that conversation

like I did with Marlboro? Yeah, I want to hear that. Exactly. Well, you know, in anime, we did a song that goes, it's a great big universe, and we're all really puny. We're just tiny little specks about the size of Mickey

Rooney. There you go. Great. Fantastic. We will return to Gilbert Gottfried's amazing colossal podcast after this. That's the sound of fried chicken with a spicy history.

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Whether you're a shop owner, a pet groomer, a contractor, or a consultant, you can get customized coverage for your business. Contact a licensed TD Insurance advisor to learn more. Let's just, because it was in the intro and because Gilbert is obsessed with the bad voices on the old Beatles cartoons. Oh, yeah. And this is obviously before Jess came along because he could knock Ringo out of the park. He really could, yeah. But he was probably not even born. But Paul Freese turns out to be the guy who was doing John Lennon. Oh, my God.

Yeah. But he was doing Toucan Sam. He was doing Toucan Sam. So Gilbert says on this show, he sounds like Tom Coleman. It's like, hey, Paul George, let's have a little adventure. Oh, my God. Do you know who the other actors were? I have no idea.

I think it was only two of them doing all four voices. There was a woman. There was a woman? Yeah, one of them was a woman. Probably. Yeah, I didn't write down her name. I never knew that. I mean, I watched that show because I was part of woman. Probably. Yeah, I didn't write down her name. I never knew that. I mean, I watched that show because I was part of Beatlemania.

Sure. But I had no... You were a rock and roll guy. Yeah. Yeah. Now, I'm getting a mental block. I hate when this happens. The voice of the Wizard of Oz.

Frank Morgan. Frank Morgan, yeah. So was Frank Morgan what you were doing for Captain Crunch? Oh, that's a good question. Was Dawes doing that? Most of Dawes' characters were impressions of classic actors. Yeah, well, Ed Wynn. Well, Wally Gator with Ed Wynn. Yeah.

And Snagglepuss was Bert Laryvon. Bert Laryvon. Yeah. He might have been. Captain Crouch. Oh, yeah. Captain Crouch. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Who rang that bell? I don't know. I think Billy's doing a little Frank. Isn't Billy adding a little Frank Nelson to one of those Futurama characters? Yes, he is.

Frank Nelson. Yes. Yeah. And one of them. Frank Nelson. Yeah. I'm sorry. characters? Yes, he is. Frank Nelson, yes. And one of them. Frank Nelson. Yeah, one of them, Billy. It was funny. It does that one Dr. Warburg or something.

Well, one of them is a little bit of Lou Jacoby. I think it's Lou Jacoby meets. George and Jesse. And I think Frank Morgan is in one of the other characters, if I'm not mistaken. With the meat hanging from his feet. Leave the markets on my shangri- Yeah. That was-

He was. Because he talks about how he- Zoidberg. He takes that- Right. Zoidberg. Zoidberg. Right.

Because he takes that Lu Giacobbe in the Diary of Anne Frank. Correct. Right. Because he's- What's the name? Zutty or something like that. He's a, I stole from the children. Yes.

I stole the food from the children. And he takes that and mashes it. Makes it a wacky zany cartoon reference. Right. He mashes it with. Georgie Jessel. Georgie Jessel. Have you heard Gilbert's Jessel

no let me hear go ahead Gil okay hello mama this is Georgie you know your son Georgie the one that sent you the checks oh yeah now you remember

so did you get that parrot I sent you what you ate the parrot that parrot spoke seven different languages. Oh, he should have said something. That's great. Bravo. You got that down. That's great.

Oh, my God. That's a big call for it these days. Yes. Hey. The kids love it. Who did the voice of Boris Karloff in Gods and Monsters? Oh, my God. That's interesting.

It wasn't Maurice? No, not that I know of. We'll have to check into that. I will have to check that out because I don't really know. I mean, that's a great question. Was it Bob McFadden that used to do the Karloff voice? The guy that did the Frankenberry in Count Chocula? Do I have the name right?

Oh, that's right. It could have been because that was right up his alley. See, but I don't even know. Who was it that did Monster Mash? Do you know who did the voice of the singer? I was thinking Bobby Boris. Yeah. Bobby Boris. He would have been gone by then.

Yeah. I never knew who did the voice. And the ones in Gods and Monsters was a more natural. Everybody does like I'm working on... Everyone does that. That was Boris Karloff doing Thriller.

Not Michael Jackson, but his old It's a Thriller. And Grinchy, but if you heard him on Conversations, oh my God, he sounded nothing. He sounded very sweet, Very sweet, gentle. Like, what's his name? Jonathan Harris.

You ever worked with Jonathan Harris? Oh, I worked with him. Jonathan Harris. I worked with that guy a hundred times. What a gas. Oh my God. I said to him, so Mr. Harris, what part of England are you from? He goes, I'm not British, dear boy.

I'm affected. Yes. Is he from the Bronx? Yeah, he was from Brooklyn. He was a Jew. He said, I'm a Brooklyn Jew and proud of it.

That's right. And he referred to his wife as the old dragon. Oh, my God. He was in the Bill Dana show. Oh, yeah. He was in the original

Broadway cast of Tea House house of the august moon very good unbelievable oh i love they once made a cartoon a problem child yeah and instead of jack wharton as says big uh oh i should remember the name so the people in Problem Child. Big Sam or Big Alley, whatever. They got Jonathan Harris. Oh, my God. Did you work with him or did you work separately? This time I was lucky enough to do one episode with him. And at that time, I know, I think Howard Stern was always talking about wanting to get Jonathan Harris.

He was great. And I said to Jonathan Harris, and I said, would you ever do the Howard Stern? And he goes, never. Of course he did. He sounded like Dr. Smith all the time. He did. And he, you know, don't talk to me, you sanctimonious bucket of boots. Oh, the pain.

It was so over the top. But I did a cartoon series with him called Channel Umpty 3. We did 13 episodes. Alice Ghostly. Yeah. John Harris. Oh, my God. Oh, it was just, I think it's probably on YouTube now, but oh, Jesus, every week for about a year, not a year, six months, and doing ADR and post-production.

And he always had these wonderful stories about, you know, the old Hollywood. In fact, he was telling a story about, get this, the rap party for Lifeboat with Tallulah Bankhead and Estelle Winwood at the rap party. So he said, I'd like to tell Sherry Hu a true story. Absolutely true. I swear as God is my witness. I walked into the party of Lifeboat and I see, and I got to use this nasty word, but it's true, the C word. Right? I see these two C words in the corner holding court.

You know, they're awful people, awful people. And the young man walked up very drunk. He says, he goes, he walks up to Tallulah Bankhead, young Randolph Scott looking type. And he walks up and he says, Miss Bankhead, I should like to fuck you. And she takes his hand and she says, and so you shall, dear boy. And they march upstairs together. True story.

Oh, my God. Fantastic. And so you shall, dear boy. That's Dick Cavett's story about Chico. Is that right? Is that right? He probably stole it from Chico and Cavett. But it was so great because he told it with his very affected, through the pain.

I remember when they did that movie, New York Stories. And the Woody Allen one had the- Oh, Mae Questel. Mae Questel. Mae Questel. Betty Boop. An olive oil. Right, an olive oil.

Little Audrey. She was hysterical in that. Here are the voice actors from the Beatle cartoon. Paul Freese was John and George. Lance Percival, who was a British... He was in the Carry On series. He was a British comedian. And he did a lousy English accent.

Right? He did Paul and Ringo. And Julie Bennett and Carol Corbett. Julie Bennett. You must have worked with Julie Bennett. Julie Bennett, I never worked with her, but she did a lot of Warner Brothers voices when Mel Blanc was only able to get the sole screen credit

because he asked for a raise in the 40s and they wouldn't give him a raise. And he said, can I have screen credit? And they're like, well, that doesn't cost us anything. She's in Hey There, It's Yogi Bear in 64. There we go. Gay Paris in 62. Julie Bennett.

How about that? And was Richard O'Brien the... I think that was his name. The original voice of Elmer Fudd. Oh, Arthur Q. O'Brien. Arthur Q. O'Brien. Yes.

So Arthur Q. O'Brien died in the middle of the production of What's Opera, Doc? Oh, wow. 1959. And Mel Blanc has one word in that as Elmer Fudd. You know, he's like, whitening, stry, bzz. And then all of a sudden, Elmer Fudd goes, smog. And R.V.Q. Bryan was so ill, he couldn't get the energy out. So Mel screams out, smog.

And then Hal Smith took over for Elmer Fudd. Is that right? For a few cartoons. And then Mel did them, I think, until he passed away. Because What's Opera, Doc is a quintessential. over for Elmer Fudd. Is that right? For a few cartoons, and then Mel did them, I think, until he passed away. Because I, what's opera doc is he? Genius. Quintessential. In fact, I didn't even, I'm a, I love classical music,

and that was my introduction to Wagner. Of course, everybody's. Because I didn't realize that it was Ride of the Valkyries. No, it's called Kill the Wabbit. Yeah. This is great. You guys want to take a whack at this crazy thing? Oh, please. With I please. This is so cool. With Iago and Pinky and Porky.

Is this your idea, Frank? Because it's genius. Well, I thank you. You're very kind. I did a lot of searching for something that had three performers in it. Oh, no. This is perfect. So I think the audience will recognize this movie.

It is rather iconic. Okay, great. This isn't a cold read. This is a frozen read. I apologize for its length, but I have every confidence that it's going to gain momentum. You know what? At my age, anytime, I apologize for its length. Hey, the room looks wonderful from here.

Okay. All right. Thank you very much. Let me take a... Can I have one simple water? Sure. Hang on. Gilbert needs to hydrate. We all need to hydrate. It's a very professional operation. The listeners should recognize the movie. Okay.

You ready, Gil? Yes. All right. Fire away. Sonny, we ought to hear what they have to say. No, no, no. No more. Not this time, Consul Jerry. No more. Not this time, Consul Yerry. No more meetings. No more discussions. No more Saloso tricks.

You give them one message. I want Saloso. If not, it's all-out war. We go to the mattresses. Well, yes, but some of the other families won't sit still for all-out war. They may hand me Saloso. Your father would not want to hear this. This is business. It's not personal. would not want to hear this. This is business. It's not personal. They shot my father?

It's business, you ass! Well, even shooting of your father was business. It's not personal, Sonny. Well, then, business will have to suffer, all right? And listen, do me a favor, Tom. No more advice on how to patch things up. Just help me win, please, all right? I found out about this Captain McCluskey who broke Mike's jaw. Now, he's definitely on Salozzo's payroll and for big money.

McCluskey has agreed to be the Turks' bodyguard. What you have to understand, Sonny, is that while Salotso's being guarded like he was invulnerable, now nobody has ever gunned down a New York police captain. Never. It would be disastrous. All the five families would come after you, Sonny. The Corleone family would be outcast. Even the old man's political protection would run for cover. So do me a favor, Narf. Take this into consideration. All right. We'll wait. I can't wait.

Huh? I said I can't wait. I don't care what Siloso says about the deal. He's gonna kill my daddy. That's it. That's the key for him.

You've got to get Sellozo. You've got to get Sellozo. You've got to get... What's his name? Let me ask you something, Professor. I mean, what about this McCluskey? What do we do with this cop here? They want to have a meeting with me, right?

It'll be me, McCluskey, and that other guy. Let's set a meeting. Get our informants to find out where it's going to be held. We can sit at a public bar or restaurant. Some place where there's a lot of people there to feel safe. They're going to search me

when I first meet them, right? I can't have a weapon on me. But if Clemenza... That sounds like a venereal disease. But if Clemenza can figure out a way to have a weapon on me. But if Clemenza... That sounds like a venereal disease. But if Clemenza can figure out a way to have a weapon planted there for me, then I'll kill them. I'll kill them but they're both dead.

And now the slow laughter breaks out. Ha ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Hey, what are you gonna do? Nice college boy, huh? Didn't want to get mixed up in the family business. Now you want to gun down a police captain.

God bless you, Frank. Because he slapped you in the face a little bit, huh? What do you think this is? The army where you shoot them and are a mile away? You gotta get close like this.

Bada bing! You blow their brains all over your nice ivory league suit. You're taking it very personal. Tom, this is business. This man is taking it very personal.

Oh, Dick. Come on, Mikey. Tom, wait a minute. I'm talking about a cop that's mixed up in drugs. I'm talking about a cop that's mixed up in the drugs. I'm talking about a dishonest cop, a crooked cop, who got mixed up in the rackets and got, what was it, coming to him. That's a terrific story. Now, we have any newspaper people on the payroll, don't we, Tom?

They might make a story like that. Well, you know, now that you mention it, they might. Yeah, they just might. It's not personal, Sonny. It's strictly... Oh, it's murder. Frank Santopadre, ladies and gentlemen.

There we go. Well done, Frank. Oh, my God. Gilbert, that was so great. Now, there are people out there going, I will never be able to watch The Godfather ever great. Now, there are people out there going, I will never be able to watch the Godfather ever again. No, there are fans out there right now animating this as we speak. Somebody's going to animate this.

Let's hope so. I feel like I can get together with the two of you and just do Godfather 1, 2, and 3. There we go. Let's do it. Why not? And, you know we all of us at different conventions and stuff,

we get to do similar things that not to this level. Frank, you were, that was really a genius. Oh, I'm glad you thought so. Yeah, it was just trying to find something iconic that people would recognize

that had three parts. When you do that, it's just the coolest thing in the world. Oh, we've done the Princess Bride. We've done Dirty Dance. There's one of the bookers who has a lot of our-

Yeah. Jeff. Jeff Zanini. Yeah. He'll have a wheel. He'll spin the wheel, and whatever movie it lands on, he'll be like, okay, Rob, we got Star Wars. You're Luke Skywalker.

Yeah, it's like, Darth Vader, we have a prisoner. Exactly. It's just so much fun. And Porky Pig, you're Princess Leia. Help me, Obi-Wan. Help me, Obi have a prisoner. Exactly. It's just so much fun. And Porky Pig, your princess Leia. Help me, Obi-Wan. Help me, Obi-Wan. What am I, a hologram? Or forget it.

Let's do these plugs. Jake, it's Chinatown. That's right. I love that. Remaking Chinatown. Let's plug Rob's wonderful book. Gil? Oh, yes.

It's called Voice Lessons. It's terrific. It's wonderful book. Gil? Oh, yes. It's called Voice Lessons. It's terrific. It's a book about gratitude. Rob Paulson, Voice Lessons. How a couple of ninja turtles, Pinky, and an animaniac saved my life. You know what? That's not hyperbole. It's the freaking truth.

Thank you, guys, for bringing that up. What's that axiom? We make plans and God laughs. Three years ago I feel a little lump on my neck and it turns out to be stage three throat cancer. And you guys have been kind enough to have me on and chat about it before, but it's not about that. We all got our

stuff. We all know that. Gil was kind enough to focus on some of the children he's had contacts with. Right now, I mean, Jesus, right now somebody's getting a phone call about their baby. Somebody's getting a phone call about their wife. Somebody's getting a phone call about a 27-year-old father who just had a child. And so I'd already had this incredible career, had a wonderful family, but I didn't die.

What I did was get the daylight speed out of me because of the treatment but um now and bob and i were just talking about this we've had wonderful careers but in the context of hollywood it's not a big deal we're just lucky that we've been working but when you're able to uh have an experience like this that i certainly wouldn't recommend to anybody however if you got to go through it you come out with a impossibly deep sense of not only gratitude, but empathy. So we now have the experience where I can now go to sit with someone or talk to them or hold their hand or whatever, metaphorically or otherwise. And when I say, boy, I know, I know. And it turns out, and I was just on Dr dr drew's show on kbc and he said you know rob i often talk to people who say gosh you know it's turned out that i have the gift of cancer or the gift of

fill in the blank because if you're able to contextualize what a problem is what struggle means um it turns out that you can really be helpful. And in my case, it was as a result of this book in the context of these characters, because all of us here have been fortunate enough to work on shows that bring utter joy to people. And so now, due to nice folks like you, opportunities to do some public speaking, it turns out that I have this bully pulpit from which I can tell my story. And then, like you're talking about, people come up to us at these events through tears telling me, thank you for sharing your story about throat cancer. Let me tell you about my brother who just died of liver cancer. But he fought as long as he could, but the last six months of his life, every day that he would have this particular treatment that was very difficult for him, but it kept him around for another holiday.

We all had our watches on alarms because we had a little piece of Ninja Turtle memorabilia every time that this young man would go through his treatment. So every day, I had my turtle action figure in my pocket or my turtle bandana because my brother, who just passed away at 37, lived for the Ninja Turtles. And so turtles will mean more to my family than you'd ever know.

And that's what I'm learning as a result of the book. So thanks for talking about it. One of the touching things in the book too is your friendships, is Maurice and Tress and Sean Astin and Randy, and now everybody was there for you. Totally.

You know who your friends are when the chips are down. Yeah, and the truth is that my wife and I decided not to talk about it too much because there was no point. Again, everybody's got their shit. I got to tell you, I saw you, I don't know if it was an audition or a job, and I'd heard, and I didn't know, and I felt terrible. Well, of course, but you, I don't know if it was an audition or a job, and I'd heard. Oh.

And I didn't know. Yeah. And I felt terrible. Well, of course. But Bob, you didn't know because we didn't tell anybody. But you were just saying that nobody knew. Sure. And all I kept thinking was, and you know, I've known Rob for 30-something years.

Long time. We're not like, we don't break bread every day. No, but we're good friends. We're buddies. Sure. And I just felt, oh my God, I wasn't there for my friend. Not at all. But you guys needed your space. You needed to deal with're buddies. Sure. And I just felt, oh, my God, I wasn't there for my friend. No, no. But you guys needed your space.

You needed to deal with your time. But I agree with you guys. This book, and I read it right after I started signing. It is brilliant. Thank you. It's also got a lot of humor. It does because it's about that. In fact, my radiation oncologist, the first time I met him, Dr. Henry Ampolsky, comes and says,

Mr. Paulson, it's a pleasure to meet you. I know what you do for a living. I'm sure we can help you. I don't know if you'll be able to. We're pretty sure we can cure you, but before we do, we almost have to kill you. And I started laughing because he reminded me of like a cheesy Goldfinger. Akeinger yeah you know akim tim akim tim tamaroff right right you are hey why mr you have to talk to him post me do you expect me to say no no miss pinky i expect you to be cured you know but uh anyway it it thank you because um

due to my wonderful friend uh mike fleeman who's the real guy who did all the heavy lifting, it turned out to be a good book. I'm really proud of it. It's funny too, as Bob says. Thank you. It was his idea to open up the book audio and in print with Pinky getting the news broken to him that I had cancer. And so I say, just Pinky, I got to chat with you about something. Is it bad news, Rob? Well, it kind of, yes.

Oh no, is Rosie O'Donnell back on network TV? It's not that, it's that. Well, what is it? What is it? Well, let me put it this way. Am I soaking in it? I don't know. Let's put it this way.

I'm not a cancer. I'm a Pisces, although it seems I haven't. You have Cancer? Well, yeah. Are you going to die? I don't know. Maybe. Well, who's going to pay for this fucking car?

You know? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. And that, what you guys are doing right now is music to our, I mean, we're all in the comedy business. And, you know, to be able to laugh, as we all do, and then you get to meet these people, as we've all discussed today, who have kept in touch with us. Gilbert's great story about the man patting the picture of his son. Yeah. have a deeply personal, utterly positive effect on all of them, even through the impossibility of burying your child. I will never know what that's like, thank God.

And people do it every day, and then they get up the next goddamn day, and they put on their shoes, and they soldier on. So I now have these examples of profiles and courage that I never would have had otherwise, and that's what the book is about. The book is about how powerful this humor is. Well, congratulations. Thank you very much. I mean, to all three of you for using your gifts.

Thank you. It's a pleasure. In such a way. Let's get the plugs in, too. There's a new Looney Tunes shorts. A pile of them. A pile of them are coming. 200 new shorts. Jesus, can I have a pile of them are coming. 200 new shorts.

Jesus, can I have a bag of money? Dude, I'm so blessed. And because it looks like you're looking at a 1940s Bob Clanton. They look so good. Full orchestra. Can't wait to see them. We've got one. It's called Curse of the Monkey Bird that's out for Oscar consideration.

Nice. It's played in the theater. So thank you, Frank. Well, I was literally talking about, I got to stop dropping names. Bob De Niro told me that. But I had lunch yesterday with Sam Register, president of Warner Brothers Animation,

and man, did he go on about you and those shorts. Oh, bless his heart. That's great. I mean, they're killer. And what's happening with the Animaniacs reboot?

Well, we're coming back as a result of the largesse of Mr. Spielberg and Hulu and Warner Brothers. Animaniacs and Pinky and the Brain are coming back next year, I guess about this time. But as we all know, it's a brave new world.

The way programming happens on Hulu and Netflix is kind of like, I guess, yeah, we'll put them on sometime. We don't know when. We don't have to worry about, you know, we're not beholden to advertisers. So we'll put them up next year. We're not beholden to advertisers, so we'll put them up next year. But it is so exciting to know that the king of Hollywood has said, hey, I think we should do this again. That's a really big deal for anybody. Moreover, when you get Mr. Spielberg to be able to say this show has really had an impact on people and not with respect to merchandising.

It's really not like Ninja Turtles. It's a show like Looney Tunes that affects people viscerally. And it's art for the sake of the art. And so to be able to do it again with Mr. Spielberg at that level and my buddies is just a gift that I don't even know how to quantify. I want to plug to your live show. I want to plug you and Randy. Oh, thanks, Frank. And Animaniacs Live. I brought my wife down to Joe's Pub to see you guys. and it's a magnificent show. Thank you. So I hope you keep

doing that. We will. And I'll tell you, it's glorious fun. You folks can have a check on it, check it out. It's at AnimaniacsInConcert.com. I think either that or Animaniacs Live, and it doesn't matter. You can find it both ways, But you'll get a chance to see the music that Randy Rogel wrote. And Randy is a genius. I don't mind saying that. He truly is. And people ask me all the time. They go, oh, my God, you did that Countries of the World song in one take?

I did. But I had a week to rehearse it, and I had the music in front of me. Look, we live in Hollywood. You guys are in New York. You can walk down the street and throw in dark and hit a good singer. I'm good at my job, but a lot of people could sing it. Writing that shit? No, no, no. He's truly gifted.

That's way different. So, yeah. Thank you very much. Come see Animaniacs in concert. It's cool. Alright, boys. My God, we could go on for days. Oh, Christ. This was so much fun, you guys. Oh, man. Thank you. And you mentioned a few times

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Yeah. I was on three episodes of – I know. You played Krang Prime. Yes. You and Roseanne. Yeah.

Roseanne played – Oh, boy. She played like the Krang boss lady and you were Krang subprime. Yes. That's what it was, right? Yes. And let me tell you, when we went into work and we said, who's going to be playing this? And they said, Gilbert Gottfried. We just, all of us.

Seth Green played Leo. I played Raph. Sean Astin, you know, Raphael. I played, no, I played Donatello in that iteration. Greg Sipes played Michelangelo. Everybody freaked out and it worked great. It was inspired casting. Have you seen it?

I haven't seen it yet. Oh, Gil, please. I think it's on Nickelodeon, or you can certainly go on the Nick website, or you can probably even go to YouTube. But you've got to see your episodes because it turned out great. I'll have to watch it. It's really good. We'll do another one of these down the line gents because there's so much more

to cover. Thank you guys. Thank you for giving us so much time. It's a party with you two. And God bless the two of you for everything you said about the Aflac firing. Thanks pal. Well, we're in this together buddy. Thank you. I'd like to try it.

Affleck! That's not as good as it is. Can a duck stutter? Sure, try that. Affleck! Geico. You hear that, ladies and gentlemen? Listen to that.

That sound is worth its weight in platinum. God bless you guys. I say laughter is the best medicine. The cool thing is you can't OD and the refills are free, and it's so goddamn true. Thank you, guys. Thank you both. This is always a kick for us. Happy holidays.

We love having you. We've been having a great time with Bob Bergen and Rob Paulson. This has been Gilbert Gottfried's amazing, colossal podcast. We don't know what to call it anymore. Yeah, we don't know. And with my co-host, Frank Santopadre. And thank the two of you. This was too much fun.

Thanks, guys. That's all, guys. Yeah, that's all. Earth. And the Earth is a ball full of oceans and some mountains which is out there spinning silently in space. And living on that Earth are the plants and the animals and also the entire human race. It's a great big universe and we're all really puny. We're just tiny little specks about the size

of Mickey Rooney. It's big and black and icky and we are small and dinky. It's a big universe and we're not. And we are small and dinky. It's a big universe and we're not. And we're part of a vast interplanetary system stretching 700 billion miles long. With nine planets and a sun, we think the Earth's the only one that has life on it, although we could be wrong.

Across the interstellar voids are a billion asteroids, including meteors and Halley's Comet II. And there's over 50 moons floating out there like balloons in a panoramic trillion-mile view. And still it's all a speck amid a hundred billion stars in a galaxy we call the Milky Way. It's 60,000 trillion miles from one end to the other, and still that's just a fraction of the way. Cause there's a hundred billion galaxies that stretch across the sky, filled with constellations, planets, moons, and stars, and still the universe extends to a place that never ends, which is maybe just inside a little jar. It's a great big universe, and we're all really puny, we're just tiny little specks of the size of Mickey Rooney, though we don't know how it got here. We're an important part here.

It's a big universe. And it's ours. Gilbert Gottfried's amazing, colossal podcast is produced by Dara Gottfried and Frank Santapadre. With audio production by Frank Verderosa. Web and social media is handled by Mike McPadden, Greg Pair, and John Bradley-Seals. Special audio contributions by John Beach. Special thanks to John Fodiatis, John Murray, and Paul Rayburn.