Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - GGACP Classic: Bob Bergen and Rob Paulsen

Episode Date: March 7, 2024

GGACP celebrates the upcoming birthdays (March 8, March 11) of award-winning voice actors Bob Bergen (Tweety, Porky Pig, Marvin the Martian) and Rob Paulsen (Pinky, Yakko, Jimmy Neutron) by revisiting this funny and moving interview from 2019. In this episode, Bob and Rob talk about the loyalty of voice performers, giving back to fans, the generosity of Daws Butler and Casey Kasem and the voices behind Toucan Sam, Charlie the Tuna and the Pillsbury Doughboy. Also, Orson Welles hits the bottle, Mickey Rooney “inspires” Walt Disney, Rob hangs with Rip Taylor (and Jonathan Harris) and 14-year-old Bob cold-calls Mel Blanc. PLUS: “What’s Opera Doc?” The genius of Randy Rogel! The outrageousness of Bob Ridgely! Remembering Marvin Kaplan! And Bob teaches Gilbert to do Porky Pig! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TV comics, movie stars, hit singles and some toys. Trivia and dirty jokes, an evening with the boys. Once is never good enough for something so fantastic. So here's another Gilbert and Franks. Here's another Gilbert and Franks. Here's another Gilbert and Franks. Here's another Gilbert and Franks. Here's another Gilbert and Franks. Colossal classic. Hi, this is Gilbert Gottfried, and this is Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast with my co-host, Frank Santopadre.

Our guests this week are two of the industry's most gifted and sought-after and passionate voice actors and animation historians. Bob Bergen is a three-time Emmy nominee who could be heard in thousands of TV commercials, promos, games, animated series, and specials. He's voiced dozens of animated features, including Minions, Despicable Me 3, Wreck-It Ralph, Tangled, Spirited Away, A Bug's Life, Monsters, Inc., Iron Giant, WALL-E, and Toy Story 2 and 3 for 20 years. He's voiced Luke Skywalker for LucasArts, Interactive Games, as well as in all three Robot Chicken Star Wars specials. He's supplied special vocal effects for dozens of films, including Gremlins, Army of Darkness, Bright Night 2, and Honey,

I Blew Up the Kid. 2019 marks his 29th year voicing iconic character Porky Pig. And he currently stars as Porky in over 200 new Looney Tunes shorts. He's also voiced Marvin the Martian, Tweety, and Speedy Gonzalez. And he tells us that Casey Kasem was much more than just a pissed off guy who cursed out his co-workers behind the scenes. Wait. Rob Paulson is making his second visit to the podcast and we still haven't gotten over his stunning rendition of yako's world we haven't the first time around he's voiced 250 animated characters in hundreds of animated shows including Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Danny Phantom, The Mask, Jimmy Neutron, Boy Genius, The Tick, Samurai Jack, Rick and Morty, and of course, Tiny Toons, Animaniacs, and Pinky and the Brain, for which he took home a well-deserved Emmy Award.

He's also appeared in live-action series like Cheers! Saint Elsewhere and feature films like Spaceballs, The Jetsons Movie, and The Ant Bully, as well as over a thousand commercials and dozens of video games, and he once looped a steamy sex scene between Tom Cruise and Rebecca De Mornay. But who hasn't? His terrific and touching memoir is called Voice Lessons. How a couple of Ninja Turtles, Pinky, and an Animaniac saved my life. Please welcome to the show two men of a thousand voices and two experts who can hopefully explain why the actors in these old Beatles cartoons sounded nothing like the Beatles.

I don't know what you mean. The enormously talented Bob Bergen and Rob Paulson. Holy cow. Is there time for more? I was going to say, when you got done with Bob, I was ready to go home because I can't compete with that. Thank you so much, you guys. If only that was true.

Yeah, that's just great. Thank you so much, Frank and Gilbert. Welcome back, Rob. Thank you, sir. And welcome, Bob. Thanks, my friend. Pleasure. Well, I know that Bob, I told Gilbert on the phone

that Bob has something very interesting to say, you know where I'm going with this Bob, about Gilbert's career. Well, and then we'll talk about the Beatles,

the bad Beatles voices. Well, are you talking about the letter you wrote? Yes. So, I, I wrote a letter

to Affleck and I said, look, you should not be holding auditions because if somebody can lose their job by telling a joke, if it's not funny, don't listen to the joke again. But it just irked me that you lost a job because somebody was offended by a joke. We are all one joke away from losing our livelihood. I mean, I was at Kevin Hart who said, where's the art of the oops? Yeah. Everyone is just one joke, one tweet away from saying, I'm sorry, we're going to cancel your career in life too.

So when they held auditions, I said to my agent, A, I'm not auditioning for this. And B, I'm going to find the address of the corporate and say, look, this man didn't do anything wrong. Yeah. He deserves this job. A lot of people felt that way. I didn't audition anything wrong. Yeah. He deserves this, this job. A lot of people felt that way. I didn't take her, I didn't audition for it. I mean, I think a lot of us,

the mutual us, we won't go after each other's jobs. It's just, it's a, it's a, it's a handshake agreement. Especially in that context. It wasn't about you saying,

I'm tired of it, or them saying we're going in a different direction. The circumstances in, that ended up in that, I think there are a lot of us who do this gig. And we all know, like Bobby said, the tenuous line that we all kind of walk. And there are a lot of folks in this realm, Gilbert.

And I'm so glad you brought that up, Frank, because it's important for other actors to hear how we- I think so. Kind of how we carry each other's water. You know, we really are all in this together. So it's good that you know that. How about that, Gil?

Thank you. Thank you, both of you. How about that, Gil? Thank you. Thank you, both of you. How about that? It didn't work for you, but I tried. Well, good for you, Bob. I refuse to audition for it too, Gilbert. Yeah. For what that's worth. that years ago when Mel Blanc was in that terrible car accident,

they knew they were making loads of money off Bugs Bunny cartoons, so they wanted to make new ones. And they asked one of the other voiceover guys at Warner Brothers, can you do Bugs Bunny? And he said, I can, but I won't. Right. Bless him. Right.

And honestly, that's happened a number of times when the Simpsons, the cast of the Simpsons started saying, look, look, we need some dough here. Right. Because they literally put that network on the map. And now they are the longest running show in the history of freaking television. Television. Yeah. So they said, look, we need to make a little more Do Re Mi. And I honestly, none of the usual suspects, I don't know anybody who does this at this level who auditioned for it.

Nobody. Because we also know that, we discussed it well and it's together, but sooner or later it will come back. That's together. But sooner or later, it will come back. That's right. And sooner or later, somebody will say, hey, man, the producers decided Rob's asking too much money to be the talking chick, and he's been doing it for 20 years. But, you know, we're going to have you. And it's nice to know that all of us are kind of going, you know. Or if it does come up where somebody's working on an iconic character like you were mentioning, Gilbert, about Mel Blanc, I always make a phone call. I'll say, look, here's the deal.

I've gotten this piece of copy. My agent has said they want to have you come in and read for Homer Simpson. Well, I'll call Dan Castellanet and find out like what's the deal. Yeah. You know what, Rob? It's fine. I'm done with it. I've had enough.

I'm moving on. I'm retiring. Or, yeah, it's kind of a money thing. That's all I need to hear. Right. I'm done. That brings me to Bob's story about Dawes, about what was it? Cap'n Crunch? Yeah. Well, uh, I was studying with Dawes. Yeah. Dawes Butler. And Dawes Butler. The Dawes Butler.

And they were, they were a new ad agency. They were going to get a new Cap'n Crunch. They were holding auditions and I was pissed and I called Dawes and I said, I can't believe they're doing this. I won't read for it. And Dawes said, oh, you know, I'm not going to be doing it anymore because they're getting rid of me. So why don't I coach you? Come on over. How about that? Isn't that great? And I did a lousy Cap'n Crunch.

But he knew that he was out. He was done anyway. He said, look, I'd like to have somebody I know, one of my students, take it over. Isn't that great, though? You guys, I love the fact that we get to have these glimpses. And thank you again for the opportunity because it's really important for people to know how folks behave in Hollywood by and large. We really are, you know, especially in this gig. Especially our world.

Yeah, in this gig. Because it's not about how big your boobs are, although you have lovely boobs. Thank you. He does. They're brand new. Or how tall you are. It's about your pure talent and your kindness and all of that stuff. And here's Dawes Butler, who's going, you know, if I'm not going to do it,

I want to see if I can help you do it, young man. Mind you, he also charged, was it $10? Or a handshake. Or a handshake. I was telling Gil on the phone about that, Gil. I would have given handshake, of course. As long as it's a handshake. Or a handshake. I was telling Gil on the phone about that, Gil. I would have given a handshake, of course. As long as it's a handshake. That's right.

That's what's important. That's right. Yeah. And I wouldn't even include all my fingers on it. Nice. Well, there's got to be some. You've got to save some of it back to do it the next time. I get it.

But everybody's a really delightful, everybody. And so I'm so glad though, Frank, that you did bring that up because we all know how tough these gigs are to get. Yeah. And you guys are a particular fraternity. We are. Without a doubt.

And we all like having new people come in. Honest to God, I love it. Eric Bauza is a good friend of mine. And Eric Bauza, Max Middleman, we have a new generation of brilliant talent. Jesus, kids are so talented. And Bauza is a good friend of mine. Eric Bauza, Max Middleman. We have a new generation of brilliant talent. Kids are so talented. They really are a mutual admiration society when we're at a session, watching each other, working off of each other. And there's a new generation coming in that are so good, so versatile, but also just as nice as the Welkers and the Harnells.

Yeah, exactly. Tress McNeil. Frank Welker, I know because he worked on Aladdin. Of course. He was the voice of the tiger and the monkey. Yes. That guy's talent just takes my breath away. It's mind-blowing.

And it's so funny about voiceover guys like him and a bunch of others. about voiceover guys like him and a bunch of others, when you watch a nature special, you don't realize. You think they're recording like lions and birds and all this. And they're not. They're bringing in these guys. They're recording Frank Walker with his head in a bucket. Yeah. They're doing jungle noises.

Gil, did you get to work with Frank? No, no. Because that's something. I didn't even run into Robin Williams. Because when you do, if you ever get an opportunity to work with Frank, it's pretty freaking mind-blowing. To watch him do his gig and hear the director say, Frank, would you shade it this way? Or we need the character to, you know, infer this idea. And Frank will make that hummingbird- As a creature.

Yes. And make it sound like what, you know, you're asking a question as a chimp. It's incredible. I was telling Bob on the phone, we'd have had him here by now, but he's a shy fellow. He's golfing right now. It's not his thing. Not a self-promoter. Yeah, he's decided which plane he wants to fly today that's right

and you know what's funny I always think like had Aladdin come out a year after it did I mean had it been made a year after it did the only person I think would have definitely been in it was Robin Williams

and they would have had like Tom Cruise as Aladdin Julia Roberts as the princess Amen, in fact you mentioned in that very kind prodigious opening that I had

It also doubles as an obituary I was going to say, if you take that piece of paper and fold it into quarters with my book, you can actually put it under your table to straighten it out. Multi-purpose book. But I've had that experience, Gil, exactly what you're talking about.

I did the movie version of Jimmy Neutron, Boy Genius. Made a hundred million bucks, got nominated for an Oscar. No celebrities in the thing. Okay. Then a few years later, I do, as you mentioned, The Ant Bully. Had Julia Roberts, Nick Cage, Paul Giamatti, Alan Cumming, Meryl Streep.

Tanked. Right in the dumper. Interesting. If you don't have a script. Story. Yeah, a story. You can have Jesus in the main role. Interesting. If you don't have a script, you can have a story. You can have Jesus in the main role. It's just,

it's not about face actors. It's about character. I always thought that like, you know, these are of course talented stars, but is anyone going to a movie because, you know, Brad Pitt's voice is in it? I don't think so.

I mean, the suits do. They want some kind of a guarantee there's box office, but that's not guaranteed there's box office. And I understand why. Bob and I were talking about this out front. We know that if you and I and Bob Gilbert got on Ellen and we start doing our respective characters, within two seconds, you got them. I mean, the folks working on the show, everybody, everybody would go, oh, my God, that's Iago and that's Porky and that's Yakko, blah, blah, blah. But getting through to them is a different story. And I understand why a producer says, I want Brad Pitt to be the talking monkey and i'll pay him a couple of million bucks and he's going to get on kimmel

and uh and you know fallon and talk about it true right you know however you still have to deliver and and when it works it works great now the incredibles is a totally different story absolutely and and ellen degeneres totally as d Exactly. But you've got a great story, great script, Ellen's voice is perfect for the part, her tweaks and her uniqueness and her sense of humor and her vibe is perfect for the character, but just having Julia

Roberts being the aunt queen is not going to make it happen. But you know what? Pixar does it well. They do it great. There's a documentary called The Pixar Story and a book. And they tell a story where they were saying,

who should play Woody? So they took a clip from Turner and Hooch. Oh, great. And it was a scene where the dog locked himself in the car and Tom Hanks is yelling through the window, don't eat the car, not the car. Right. And they animated that line with Woody.

Woody. And they went, that's him. Perfect. That's the personality. And it works great. But when they find the great celebrity, it is the perfect marriage of character and personality. Yeah. It's not, they don't go to the mic going, what sound should I do?

What character should I do? They just, they're good actors. They virtually, with the exception of Robin. Right. And Jim Carrey, they virtually always do themselves. That's right. And it has to work perfectly. Otherwise, just having –

Albert Brooks. Right. I mean, I can just – but they're wonderful. Buddy Hackett in Little Mermaid. Little Mermaid. Right. It's just Buddy Hackett being Buddy Hackett. All the time.

It worked perfectly for that character. But that's a great point. Whether or not they're celebrities is not the issue. It's the character. And along those lines, it doesn't – I heard you guys say it doesn't bother you when creators put themselves in the cartoons too, as long as it's somebody like Seth or Brad Bird who brings something to it. If they want to do it, that's fine. We have no pull, no sway.

Sure. So the only thing that we can do, I submit, is to make ourselves so good at our gig, that we can do, I submit, is to make ourselves so good at our gig, especially in this environment where they want to hire celebrities to do the next $400 million animated project that comes out, is to be so good, and nice folks

like you have us on your shows, the word gets out, and people, you know, you just have to make them get to a position where the producers say, now I know Bob Bergen can totally do this, but I just want to get Brad Pitt and pay him $5 million to do it. Because we can compete chops-wise. So it's really nice that we're having opportunities to let people know who we are.

And I just got to ask this. Now, was Doris Butler the voice of Droopy? No. He probably did him a few times. Bill Thompson was the voice of Goofy, yeah. And when he would do Droopy and Jeff Bennett does him this way now too he would hold his face

out like this just to get some airiness in there oh dear oh dear and this side of his face would sag a little bit lower he was drooping

the other side because he was also you know he was smeet right and the nice thing is you can have a stroke

and nobody would know that's right exactly but you'd mentioned He was also, you know, he was Smee. Right, and the nice thing is that you can have a stroke and nobody would know. That's right. Exactly. But you'd mentioned both Dawes and Mel. Did you guys ever notice that Barney Rubble's voice changed three times? Yes, I did know that. So here's the story.

So Mel Blanc, actually, I think it was actually Dawes. It might have been Dawes or Hal Smith was the original voice of Barney Rubble. Hal Smith. But Mel Blanc. Notice the drunk for yous out there. Oh, sure. That's right. Notice the drunk. And Mel did Barney in the first season of the Flintstones,

and he did Barney sort of like this. Hiya, Fred, where's Wilma? Right. And then Mel was in that terrible car accident. Oh, that's right. And Mel was laid out, and Dawes came in. And they said, Dawes, can you play this character? It's the Honeymooners.

Do your Art Carney. Yeah. And Dawes is like, but my Art Carney is Yogi Bear. And I can't do that. I've already done that. So he just pitched his voice up. How you doing, Fred? Is that right?

A little pinch higher. So then Mel had a pay or play contract. Oh. And he was on a body cast. And they put a microphone over his hospital bed. And in season two two he came back he couldn't do this voice it was established

so he did the voice a little bit lower what a great story that's great oh is that right yeah oh my god

they were in a body cast they hung a mic over yeah there's pictures in his book of him him like this with Gene Vanderpile and Harry

just kind of leaning in talking over the microphone while he's just in a body cast and I heard that that that mel blank used to travel to children's hospitals on his own to do cartoon voices for the kids not great yeah oh man gilbert i'm telling you we've we've all had that experience and most of the time of course is on the phone where it's most effective but when it when you're lucky enough to be in a room with someone who's struggling, and it's very often children and their parents, and man, you start lighting up that character, and it changes everything. It is nothing short of remarkable.

I know you've seen this because you've got, know Iago's iconic character now but I'm telling you we are so fortunate because whenever we're in a position where social situation hospital party whatever and people find out who we are it's just joyful period and I love that aspect of it because often parents keep in touch with us after their children sadly don't make it right and it turns out that that some of their fondest memories are seeing their sweet little baby talking to porky pig or or iago or you know uh megatron on the phone and they'll they'll send me videos of yeah my little girl didn't make it but you just got to know what fill in the blank mentor it's way bigger than a paycheck

it's astonishing it is that's beautiful you guys saw the documentary you're certainly aware of it with Gilbert and Owen yeah

yeah life animated yeah life animated it was so brilliant Mr. Susskind yes I was just doing

some stuff in New York with the autism shine a light on autism, whatever, the Autism Speaks. And yeah, I had seen a life animated. And isn't it interesting now how many people we see on the autism spectrum at these conventions that come up. I notice that. Yeah.

Yeah. It's incredible, Gilbert. I can't get enough of it. And often children, you know, like 25 or 30-year-old children who are struggling with autism issues, I've had more than a half dozen experiences where a loved one will come up to me and say, here's my brother. He's about 10 or 12 people down in line, and he's really struggling. Because often they have issues with stimulus, being overstimulated.

But I'll be damned. That young man will stand there, a young woman, and really struggling up and they're shaking, not from nervousness to see you, shaking from their agoraphobia or whatever it is. But, man, you open your mouth and Iago comes out and it just evaporates. It's freaking magical. And they know my career better than I do. Yes, they do. Backwards. Every episode, they know my career better than I do. Yes, they do. Backwards.

Every episode, they know the time code. They know what you wore at the audition. They know everything. Yeah. And they're utterly dedicated. And I can only imagine, you know, being a parent, oh, my God, if my kid wanted to talk to Iago and I knew Gil was going to be, I would do whatever it took to get my baby there because that person will never forget it. And so, you know, it's just a, it's a cool thing to be part of this whole experiment. I love it. I was, I was in New York a few years ago and I went to children's hospital, you know, just like, like you just

like to just touch base and do some voices and draw some pictures. And this big chubby guy with a Mickey mouse shirt comes over to me and he goes, do you happen to do Mickey Mouse? I said, I don't do Mickey Mouse, but I know him. He goes, my kid loves Mickey Mouse. I said, can I call him? Oh my God. Good for you, Bob.

So I forgot that there's a time difference between, it was nine o'clock in the morning, 6 a.m. So I called Wayne, and I got Rusey. Who's Minnie Mouse? Who's Minnie Mouse? They were married in real life. Yes, I remember. I met them. And she said, listen, Wayne's still sleeping.

Will he settle for Minnie? I said, hang on for a second. Will you settle for Minnie Mouse? Fantastic. Mickey Mouse is asleep, and he goes, yeah, that's fine. She goes, give me some time to get some coffee. I said, great. Call her back in 30 minutes.

Put her on speaker. Now, this boy had a deformity of his face. And he was in there for surgery. Didn't speak. And she gets on the phone. And he is just giddy. And he's smiling. And he's making noises.

And the parents are crying. And I'm crying. And I hung up the phone. And I invited the father to my one-man show that night because they had left this hospital. Roosie calls me later on and says, nobody knows this. Wayne's not well. Oh, yeah. He wasn't sleeping.

He's not well. I said, let me tell you what you just did for this kid. I'm going back to we're a really generous community. It's just incredible. And the parents and the children never, never will forget it. Never. It's just emblazoned in their psyche. I have had people come over to me showing me pictures of their children who have passed away and thanking me.

Amen, Gilbert. And it is impossible to express, for me anyway, what that means to me. Look, I love my gig and I love making a living, but that's way bigger than a paycheck. You bet. It's way bigger than an action figure or a rating point. It is a deep connection that people make after their children have left, and they will never forget Iago. How cool is that? That's an extra payment you guys get.

Yes. Our friend Paul Williams calls that a heart payment. Oh, God. Absolutely. Brilliant. He's a gas. Yeah, he is. And it's like with Life Animated where I help a son and his family speak to each other,

which I thought, how the hell can I do that? And you never in a million years when you got that gig would have thought, you know, this is going to be cool. It's Disney. It's a big deal. It turned out to be a very big deal. But, you know, as Paul mentioned, the happy payment or the hard payment, you never would have known that.

And the fact that we're in this time now where we can do podcasts and nice folks like you can have bobby and me on we can share these stories it's it's the best part about about being successful quote unquote it is the absolute embodiment of paying it forward and also it's effortless it's just joyful like you you love it don't you guys in some sense we talked about this with Dawes and Bob, don't you want to pay it forward in some ways too? Not that this isn't in your nature, but also because of the mentors that you had, that you guys were properly taught.

Especially Bob. Well, I had people. I had Dawes. I had Casey Kasem. I had people who just held my hand. And I was the kid. And I remember saying to Caseyy why are you doing this and he said because you're going to promise to do it do it again do it over and over and over again

it's one of the reasons i teach it's one of the reasons that you know we go to well listen before these fan conventions we didn't even know people watch this of course you know you guys are rock stars people are walking watching because we get picked up so we knew that we were working but we didn't know how people were affected. But you've had remarkable experiences with the best of the best. I've been very, very fortunate. But, you know, I think we have a very generous community. But Dawes said to me, I'm sorry, Casey said to me, you are going to promise me that you'll keep paying it forward as well.

And I do. And he does, yeah. It's great. But always depressed me is that um mel blank was training his son noel no to be a voiceover to take over the family business and it never uh i don't know that it ever worked i mean i've only worked with Noel once, years ago on a Tiny Toon Adventure. Well, that's okay. that was his first job

after his dad died. Noel's got to be close to 80 now. Easily. I think he's in his 80s, yeah. Yeah. And I know that,

I mean, I remember, it was before I moved to LA. I was in Cincinnati. I wanted to be Porky Pig and I'm turning on the TV and there's Mel Blanc with his son saying,

my son's going to take over and I was like, well, that's that. And I think the bottom line is it was his dad's dying wish that his son do this. So I think that this, Gil, the sweet thing

is that his dad left us thinking that his son was going to take over, and that's all that counts. For Mel. Yeah. I mean, Noel, he had some good voices. I don't know if he had the chops. No, nobody is Mel Blanc. Oh, my God, none of us are Mel Blanc. It takes half a dozen people to replace him.

And even those of us that are consistently working, none of us will ever be or sound a thing like Mel Blanc. Nope. He's an original. I'm just, like you said, I think that's the best way to look at it. Mr. Blanc was comfortable that his son was going to do what he requested. And I never worked with him. And what did Noel do? I don't know. I do do what he requested. And I never worked with him. And what did Noel do? I don't know.

I do know what he did. He ran Blank Communications. And from the 60s on, Noel Blank, Gary Owens, and Mel Blank had a company. And they produced commercials, hundreds of thousands of commercials. No kidding. Yeah. Wow. Because I know, Mel, what I like to listen to is the radio classics on Sirius Satellite Radio.

Oh, like the Jack Benny stuff? Yes. Yes. Good stuff. Isn't that the greatest when Mel shows up as a car or— Sea, size. Yes. It's just freaking genius, you guys.

All you audience, listen to it. It's incredible. These are from the 30s and 40s where Mel was the guy, the utility player on Jack Benny's show. And to this day, when I was a kid and, you know, watching Johnny, my hero, and Mel showed up, he'd have Johnny on the floor in 30 seconds. Yeah, absolutely. And, oh, my God, it was never not fabulous to have Mel Blanc come on. But this is where I learned how to do Porky, was listening to Mel Blanc on radio shows. Really? Because he had a character called Private Sad Sack.

Oh, yeah. Which was Porky Pig. Yeah. But so many of Mel Blanc's characters were sped up electronically. Yeah, I learned that watching an interview with you. I never knew that Daffy was sped up Sylvester. Correct. Pardon me, but this is, I mean, Bobby,affy was sped up Sylvester. Correct. Did you,

does Gil, pardon me, but this is, I mean, Bobby, you know, he's the cream of the crop. Have you ever heard Gil

how, how Porky does, because you've, you've broken it down in how Porky pretty much does his thing, right? Yeah.

Would you mind explaining that to Gil? The stutter? You want to learn how to do Porky for you guys? Yeah. This is cool. This is very cool. All right,

so, so, so, but you got, but you got to do Porky Pee, you guys? Yeah. This is cool. This is very cool. All right. But you got to take it step by step, and you have to count out the sounds with your fingers because if you don't, you will go crazy. So, all right. So, first of all- Gilbert's saying, too late. That's right. Say the word boy.

One, two, three. Boy. Good. Now say, eh. Eh. Count it out with your fingers. Eh. Eh.

Frank? Oh, I thought it was just for Gil. Okay. Boy. Everybody. Boy. Eh. Count it out with your fingers. Eh. Eh. Frank. Oh, I thought it was just for Gil. Okay, boy. Everybody. Boy, eh. Eh. Eh. Eh.

Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh.

Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh.

Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh.

Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh.

Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh.

Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh.

Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh.

Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh.

Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh.

Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh.

Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh.

Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Eh. Ab-a-b-a-boy. Ab-a-b-a-boy. Ab-a-b-a-boy. No, no, no. Don't jump ahead, Frank. Don't jump ahead. I'm sorry.

Now. Going to the rest. Now, wrinkle your nose so it sounds nasal. Oh. Yes. Ab-a-b-a-boy. Go ahead, Gil. Try it. Come on, try it.

That nasal part is the hard one. Just sprint. Yeah, because you know what? Nasal is never going to work for Gil, right? Yeah. Ah-ha-ha-ha. Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha. I think he came out nasal

this is Bob LaFontaine sitting next to you that's right exactly so try it with nasal pretty good now on the third sound push it more good enough that's right try another word

I'll buy that A B-A-A-Boy. Good enough. That's right. Try another word. A D-A-D-A-Dog. A D-A-D-A-Dog. I'll buy that. Try the word ball. Try the word ball. A B-A-B-A-Ball. A B-A-B-A-Ball. Okay.

Isn't that the coolest thing ever? Now, now, now. We got the final. Here's the final test. You got to do a whole sentence, and I'll do it first, then you're going to mimic me. Ready? Yes. A B- a cat with a dog. Oh, I can't.

Fantastic, Bobby. How about that? Isn't that the coolest thing? Fantastic. Could I have a Caesar salad on table five? But I will, going back to the celebrity thing. Oh, that's so cool. I've re-auditioned for Porky six times.

Yeah, which is also an important part of this whole experiment. It's not like being a movie star. You don't own it. And if a new producer comes around and says, you know, I'd like to hear him again. But Bob's killed it every damn time. Well, not every time. I mean, my fingers are crossed. But the bottom line is for Space Jam, for the first Space Jam, I'm at the final callback.

And they said that they're actually – they have an offer out to Jack Lemmon because he had a real stammer. Yeah, he did. Yeah, he did. Jack Lemmon. And I said, how can you change an iconic character? That's the thing. It's not about Jack Lemmon. I love Jack Lemmon.

I mean, one of my favorites. Poor geek. But the casting director said to me, you know, lots of people have played James Bond. Yeah. It's not the same thing. And that's when said to me, you know, lots of people have played James Bond. Yeah. It's not the same thing. And that's when I was like, you know, I have no comeback. You can't argue with that. Why Mel Tillis never went out for a Porky Pig is also a mystery.

No kidding, right? Well, Mel Tillis, I heard him on a 2020 interview years ago where he said that Porky was his hero. Is that right? He had nobody in show business to relate to him. Porky was his hero. Hey, man. I love that. Whatever it takes, baby.

We will return to Gilbert Gottfried's amazing, colossal podcast, but first, a word from our sponsor. Okay, you've given us the perfect segue. We're just talking about Mel Blanc,

and we're going to ask you guys to indulge us while we share this wonderful phone call with our listeners. So, Bob, set this up because Gilbert flipped for it and it's worth hearing.

Yeah, I moved to LA. My dad took a job here when I was 14. So cool. I wanted to be Porky Pig, so I just thought, I'm going to call the guy and tell him, look, I'm here and I've seen you on TV

and you look like you're at retirement age and I would love to give you that opportunity. No offense, you look like you got one foot in the grave. I thought I was being very generous. Before you take a big dirt nap, maybe you look like you got one foot in the grave. I thought I was being very generous, actually. Before you take a big dirt nap,

maybe you'd like to help a fellow Jew out here. That's right. That's right. And I got the phone. You want the whole damn story there? Give us the Reader's Digest version because it's fascinating.

Well, the Reader's Digest story is that I looked in the phone book and I couldn't find his phone number. And my dad says, you know, because we were from Cincinnati, he goes, you know, L.A.'s bigger than Cincinnati. So he traveled from like Pasadena to Malibu and went to the post offices. And he got me a stack of white page phone books. What a cool dad.

And I just, I called every blank in the book. And I went from the M or Mel blank. There were a lot of them with C's? Oh, yeah. Wow. In the kitchen, I had my little portable tape recorder with a little built-in mic, and I put the phone on, and I pushed record, ran into my parents' room, called the first number. I'm calling for Mel Blanc,

the cartoon guy, wrong number, sorry, bye. I hung up the phone, and I went through the whole book, and I couldn't find his number. Then I thought, well, maybe it's under his wife's name, which was Estelle, And I knew that. And I found E Blank and the Pacific Palisades and I got him on the phone and I recorded it.

And I kept the recording. It's up on my website. Check this out. We're going to play it. Hello? Is Mr. Blank there? Hello? Mr. Bl Black? Yes. My name is Bob, and I'm interested in doing voice whisper cartoons. Yeah. And I was wondering if you'd give me any advice on how to go about it.

How did you get my number? Well, that's a funny story. I used to live in Cincinnati, and I saw a show called Wonderama, and you mentioned your wife's name was Estelle. Oh, yeah. And I was looking for your name in the phone book, and I saw Mrs. Estelle, and I just figured that was your wife. Yeah. Tell me, have you created any voices? Do you just do impressions or impersonations?

Well, I've got one voice. It's hard to understand. Let me tell you something in the first place. Every voice must be understandable to be in a cartoon. Because if they can't understand you, it's like you will never go away with this Donald Duck. Yeah. And the other character has to repeat what he says every time he says something. So that's not good.

But if you can create voices, you know, for example, you see a little kitten. If you want to talk, you can talk. You know, it's a small animal. You have to take them in for a real surprise. Do this with all the animals you see. Yeah, and dialect. I should work on dialects and stuff like that. Well, dialects aren't as important as the creation of voices. But when you were, like, if you were working in a studio, did they tell you when you were doing bug study, did they say, say, what's up, Don, and talk like that?

No, they just actually showed me a cartoon, a picture of the character they're going to use in the cartoon. They tell me what it's going to do in the cartoon, and I have to create the voice for them. Wow. I mean, it's a timid little character. I get the timid voice. It's tough, like Bugs Bunny. I have to get the tough voice. And he's tough like Bugs Bunny, having to give a tough voice. And so on down the line. So... I tell you, it's not an easy business to get into. How old are you?

Fourteen. Fourteen? Yeah. Well, it takes an awful long time to get established. Did you need an agent when you started out? Uh, yes. Did you? Well, at the time I didn't.

I went to pay here and they had to get a validation. Oh, did it? If I would have had an agent, I could have got in much quicker. Because I can't walk to any studios and I don't have... I'm real gutsy and I said, could you use a guy to do voices for our team? And they asked me to do some voices. And I went to Woody Woodpecker and they said,

it's pretty good, but they don't get any animation. All right, you have to... Let me just tell you what happened at the end. My mom and dad were out. I had signs everywhere all over the house, in the garage, outside by the mailbox. Don't hang up the phone. I'm talking to Mel Blanc. My mother comes in and hangs up the phone. God bless you. That's a piece of,

that should be in the Library of Congress. That's a big deal. It's also illegal. I know. You're not allowed to do that, but it's been over 40 years. Oh my God, but it was so charming. And your voice as a young boy

sounded almost like a character. Yeah. Hi, Mr. Blanketsmith. Can I tell you, do you own a weapon? He says, tell me, have you created any voices?

And my first thought was, I do this pig. But I just thought that would be kind of rude to go there at that point. But looking at this recording now in the historical context, he would have no way of knowing. Imagine that he was talking to someone who would succeed him and doing one of his most famous voices because you're only a 14 year old kid on the phone and he also goes

it's a tough business to get into and I'm like okay screw that, do you need an agent? I'm like just tell me how to do this whatever it takes and I think that's a really cool thing because there are a lot of us not everybody has the good fortune to know what drives them when they're 14.

Whatever the it is. Right, whatever it is. It could be working in a flower shop or being an actor. Man, if you're gifted enough or blessed with the passion at 14 and say, oh, dude, I know exactly what I want to do, that's pretty cool. The first time I got up on a stage, like an open mic night, I was 15. Yep. And you knew it, right? And it's like a drug.

Yeah, exactly. It is. It's once, like they say, first one's free, baby. And after that, man, you're done. And it really, it's not about, you don't care it takes time to get an agent. You don't care I got to drive here from Michigan. You've got to do it. You've got to do it.

Yeah. And, oh, my goodness, what an experience, Bob. That's so cool. Chutzpah. Chutzpah, Bob. A 14-year-old. Yeah, a little bit. Chutzpah.

Yeah. And you recognize Mel Blank's voice the second he says, isn't that Gilbert? You nailed it. Same thing. I worked with Mel twice. And just his, like you said, listening to this phone conversation, oh, my God, that was the great man. That was him.

Yeah. I worked with him twice, and once I got to speak with him, and we were working on a Jetsons project. He was probably 79. Yeah. And Gordon Hunt, the director, said, hey, Robbie, you want to sit next to Mel? And of course. And I mustered up the courage to make small talk. And I finally said, Mr. Blank, I'm sorry.

I don't mean to be a bother. But if it's not too much trouble, would you? And he knew exactly what I wanted. And he just looked at me and said, Ian, what's up, doc? And it just blew my mind. That's all it took. That's fantastic. Ian, what's up, doc?

Four words and it was instantaneous. Now, there's an amazing story. When Mel Blanc was in a coma, they kept saying, you know, Mel, Mr. Blanc, Mel, and he wouldn't answer. After the car accident. Yeah, after the car accident. Laurel Canyon, I think. Right, Sunset. And the doctor said, can I speak to Bugs Bunny, please? And he answered as Bugs Bunny.

Isn't that crazy? Yeah, they did a revival of This Is Your Life back in the 70s. And I think it was Mel's doctor from UCLA was on saying, yeah, he just, you know, Mel was in a coma. And he got an idea to say, hey, Bugs Bunny, are you there? And then he tried Porky Pig and then he tried Daffy Duck. And Mel responded. The characters came back before Mel did. Isn't that nuts? Isn't that wild?

It is. And honestly, God, you guys, because of this new time in which we live and we can go to all these conventions, I mean, they're springing up like zits on a 12-year-old everywhere. And I'm so glad they are because we get to see firsthand what Gil was talking about with respect to life animated. We get to see it and have people literally, they don't care what we look like, but as soon as Porky starts talking, oh, my God. People often get tearful, you guys. Yes. It goes beyond entertainment. It's crazy.

I had a guy come up to me on a plane once saying how his son, and he said, was a tremendous fan of yours. Oh, Jesus. And he said, so seeing you is making it, makes it better. And then he's, I see he's wearing a pin that is obviously his son. Yeah. And he affectionately pats the pin and goes, well, getting better. Right. Isn't that something?

It's amazing. It truly is. Maurice LaMarche, who's my friend, the brain, and I were a couple of years ago at an event in Dallas. And what I love about this whole experience is that it's not about age. It's not about money. It's not about religious affiliation.

It's about nothing but pure and utter joy. And big fella, probably 6'3", 6'4", 2 1⁄4", tatted out, long ponytail, finally makes his way up. And I said, hey, God, you're the big one, aren't you? And he started to get tearful. And I said, oh, God, I'm sorry. He said, no, Mr. Paul's not. I'm so sorry. I don't mean to be.

And I said, no, Jesus. Was it Bill Clinton? I'd like to show you something I'm so sorry, I don't mean to be. And I said, no, Jesus. Was it Bill Clinton? No. I'd like to show you something about, I'm really proud of. You know, I'll thank a lady. We like to offer Lady Tipperillas. I give them cigars, that sweet girl from Beverly Hills, and she done screwed every one of them up. I bet it was. But no, it was not Bill Clinton, but thank you.

And this young man got very tearful, and we started chatting. And it turned out that he had done two tours of duty in Afghanistan. And, you know, it was in combat. And he said, you just will never know, man. And I'd go out on patrol and do my job, which was to essentially kill the bad guys and not get killed yourself. Something that I will never have any concept of what that's like. Then he and his buddies go back, have a couple of beers when they, you know, chill out for the couple of days that they're off,

and they watch Pinky and the Brain. And they watch Ninja Turtles, Looney Tunes, and of course they also watch TV things, you know, regular live action. But just hearing Pinky and the Brain speak to this veteran. This escape. Yeah. He got tearful. Yeah.

I mean, it's incredible. did how did pinky's voice and this is you've been asked this question a million times how did you arrive at uh at at pinky it was um uh you know just like we all do throw stuff against the wall and animaniacs was a protracted audition piece because everybody knew that it was Mr. Spielberg and lots of music and all that stuff. So it took a while. And we just tried a bunch of different stuff. My heroes when I was a kid were Jonathan Winters,

Peter Sellers, Red Skelton, Carol Burnett, the usual gang, you know. I love Foster Brooks. Foster Brooks. Bless your heart, Rob. Yeah, Jesus. I just love anyway so i we all played with voices um but for whatever reason uh as it dwindled down i must say that maurice when he walked in it was a fait accompli as soon as he opened his mouth and they put orson wells

with that picture of the brain and the giant brow and all, you know. Yeah. Modeled after our friend Tom Minton. Yes. That's right. Tom Minton. Who I had the honor to work for. Totally. Great guy. And they just said, well, we can cancel the rest because we got the brain.

Did he come in with that or did they say, can you do your Orson Welles? I think Mo looked at it and said, oh, I think I got something. Was Maurice just walking around doing this Orson Welles impression? Well, he still does. You know, Mo, of course we know Maurice was a successful stand-up and was in that Rodney Dangerfield. Right, he is, yeah. All that stuff. But he did such

great impressions and it just fit like a glove and so I threw a bunch of different stuff in and we mixed and matched and finally they kept saying, you know, that kind of weird Cockney vibe that you're doing works really well with the brain and they they kept saying, you know, that kind of weird Cockney vibe that you're doing works really well with the brain

and they would try it, you know, write a script and have it go back and forth and I would, basically it was the Pythons and Peter Sellers who inspired that.

So you were paying tribute to your two, some of your comedy heroes. And totally. And up until then, every Orson Welles was always like that. Yeah. Yeah. And then to hear that. Like John Candy's Orson Welles was always like that. Yeah.

Yeah. And then to hear that. Like John Candy's Orson Welles was like that. Yes. Yes. And to hear that, you go, oh, my God, that's the voice. I love that he looped Vincent D'Onofrio and Ed Wood. Yes.

And Ed Wood. And when you see Vincent D'Onofrio playing a young Orson Welles, it's Moe. Is that right? Yeah. Yes, sir. see Vince D'Onofrio playing a young Orson Welles, it's Mo. Is that right? Yeah.

Yes, sir. But what's also great is that we love the fact that we can do this gig and people are so versatile. Mo's been the voice of Toucan Sam, which was a Paul Freese gig. Yeah. He's been doing it for 30 years. Probably longer than Paul did. Yeah, I think. Paul Freese doing Ronald Coleman.

That's right. Doing Ronald Coleman. That's right. Follow your Coleman. That's right. Follow your nose. We can all do that. That's the thing I do now. That's right. But also our buddy Jim Cummings is Winnie the Pooh, Tigger, the Tasmanian Devil.

He's another crazy talent. Oh, my God. And Ray the Firefly and Princess and the Frog sang those great songs. Such a good singer. Oh, my God. Firefly and Princess and the Frog sang those great songs. Such a good singer. Oh, my God.

And when Paul Freese was speaking about, you know, it was Boris Badenov and so many other great characters, but he was also the Pillsbury Doughboy. These guys are just so talented, and they're utterly different. It's remarkable. What gets me is there was a voiceover guy I knew named, you probably have met him, Len Maxwell. Oh, yeah. Do you guys know Len Maxwell?

I remember him. He used to do the Hawaiian Punch. Oh, that's right. Of course. Yeah. How about a nice Hawaiian Punch? How about a nice Hawaiian Punch? And I remember, because he did all these different character voices, and I said, do you just do a regular voice

and he goes I've got about 10 regular voices and they all sounded like he wasn't putting on a voice that's the magic but that was Paul Freese Paul was like that too and you go to Disneyland and the Haunted Mansion Paul Freese opens his mouth and it's just

incredible and you know Herschel Bernardi was Charlie the Tuna. There you go. Yes, yes. Very good. It's just all so cool. And our buddy Arnold Stang, remember on Top Cat? Oh, my God, yeah.

He was doing the Phil Silvers imitation. That's right. And Marvin Kaplan, who we had on this show. Sorry, T.C. How old is Marvin? Oh, he's gone now. He passed away. He passed away a couple of years ago.

He was terrific. Really? Oh, Lorenzo Music. Oh, yeah. We were very good buddies with Lorenzo. And what was so charming is that Lorenzo, he knew he had one voice. He did, yeah.

But I remember auditioning with him for a Knott's Berry Farm Halloween radio spot. Right. So he's supposed to be the Knott's Berry Farm. Hi, welcome to Knott's Berry Farm. How can I help you? And I'm playing like a Dracula guy. He'll do bobbing for blood or whatever it was.

Okay. So we get done and we're getting ready to leave. And it was so great. Lorenzo says, hey, Rob, do you mind if we switch characters and I read for, well, no, if the, you know, casting. Sure.

So we switch and I say, hi, welcome to Knott's Berry Farm. I'm here bobbing for blood. I mean, it was just. Just doing Lorenzo. Totally did Lorenzo.

Yeah. It wasn't Dracula. It was Carlton the doorman. Well, did you. Garfield. Did you ever hear Lorenzo's demo? Yeah. Lorenzo's demo was literally two minutes of different commercials of him saying hello in different ways.

Hello. Hi, honey. Hi. Oh, hi. Hi there. Oh, hello. Hi. Hello.

That was it. Pretty good comedy writer, too. He was the Kentucky Fried Chicken of voice guys. That's right. He did one thing, but he did it so well. But, of course, he made all his money producing and writing Mary Tyler Moore. And Rhoda. Rhoda.

Good writer. I remember when we had Marvin Kaplan on the show, the first thing, we spoke to him on the phone first, and the first thing you recognized that voice immediately. A frisbee in the great race and and right yeah you know he obviously didn't understand like podcasts and anything and he goes do do i have to dress up for it that was really good gilbert because he's such a he was the embodiment of the nebbish right yes the Yes. The sweetest man in the world. I'm afraid I think I dislocated my scapula putting on my slipper.

I love shit like that. What about some of these other names? Because Bob and I were talking on the phone. He said he worked with the great Howard Morris. Oh, yeah. And Hal Smith's name already came up. Hal Smith. Dave Madden. Howard Morris was part of

your show of shows. Sure. Show of shows, Andy Griffith's show. I worked with him as he was a director. I never worked with him as an actor. Was it called Monster High? Monster High. Very good. Monster High. Bob Ridgely. Bob Ridgely. Oh, yes! We love Bob Ridgely. Terrific.

The hangman in Blazing Saddles. Yes. Doing the Tower of London. So my very first- He was so naughty. My first commercial- And I loved him. My first commercial ever- Yeah?

Was for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Ridgely? Well, so- Shut the front door. Do people know that you're one of the tribe? So I walked in, and Ridgely walks in with a dog, and we're on phone patch with Utah.

And Ridgely walks up to the mic and says, Hey, any of you Mormons want to fuck my dog? And there's a long pause. There's a long pause, and over the phone I hear, Who said that? And the engineer in LA says, that was Bob. And I went, Ridgely.

That was Ridgely. Ridgely. Not Bergen. Ridgely. Got a little Pat McCormick in him. Pat McCormick, same way. I remember seeing Pat McCormick at the voice caster. And somebody had asked him while I was there.

And it's a true story. I'm sure he told it. I'm thinking about what was the best Karnak response that didn't make it. No, the answer is cock robin. Conk robin. And they open the envelope, and it says, what is that in my mouth, Batman?

Isn't that something? And Pat McCormick's holding court and telling that. And then, I swear to God, another time I walk in, it was like being in Broadway Danny Rose. Remember Johnny Hamer? Oh, sure. Johnny Hamer was the guy in Annie Hall who's doing the best. In Annie Hall. You look wonderful from here.

Exactly, Frank. This is why I love your show so much. because you guys, what we're talking about. So I walk in, and I had literally watched Annie Hall like two nights before, and I see Johnny Hamer. And I said, oh, my God, Mr. Hamer. Hi, my name is Rob Paulson. I am such a fan. I got to tell you, sir, I just watched Annie Hall the other night. And before I finished, he goes, oh, you mean, hey, the room looks wonderful from here.

Oh, wow. And he just went right into it. These guys are on. You push the button. Oh, my God. He was Dale in MASH, too. Yes, he was. Sergeant Dale.

Somebody who knew Bob Ridgely said to me that, like, the way he had that weird ending where he winds up in prison. Oh, in Boogie Nights. In Boogie Nights. Yeah, crying. They said, had Bob Ridgely lived longer, that would have been how he would have wound up. Oh, wow. Probably. Without a doubt.

Listen, I remember my wife and son and I were heading down to San Diego on the train because it's a fun thing to take the starlight, you know, coast starlight. So we go down there and it was four o'clock and five o'clock in the afternoon on a good Friday going down for Easter. And I said, I'm going to go grab something, but I have to, honey, I'm going to go get some food. I got to walk through another passenger car to get to the food car. And you guys, I opened the door to walk through this passenger car and I hear this booming.

There he is, Patty. His wife's name was Patty. There he is, Patty. There's the young man I was telling you about within the enormous package. Young man over here, over here. And it was freaking Ridgely standing up on a jammed passenger train screaming about me and my package. I didn't know he was on there. I was like, oh, hi, Bobby.

Oh, my God. He had such hubris. His mind. His mind. Oh, and very quick. And you Oh, my God. He had such hubris. His mind. His mind. Oh, and very quick. And you're right, Gil, because today, oh, bless his heart. We have a casting office here called Voice Casters, which we don't go to nearly as often as we used to. But we would go there, and, you know, you're finished reading.

Oh, yeah. But there's Ridgely and Jack Angel and Danny Dark and everyone holding court. And you're like. Pat McCormick. Oh, my God. Exactly. Jack Riley and that group. Everybody. I never worked directly with, but I was in a voiceover with was I did this thing.

They did like a new tiki room thing at Disney. So I did, you know, a Yago. And then for another bird there, and I never met him, unfortunately, Frank Ravencroft. Oh, Thorough Ravenscroft. Thorough Ravenscroft. Thorough. Tony the Tiger. Yeah, he was Tony the Tiger.

Yeah. What a voice. Yes. And he was also the guy that said, you're a mean one, Mr. Grinch. Thorough Ravenscroft was the voice of Tony the Tiger almost until he died, like into his 90s, right? I think so, easily. It was incredible. And he's another one of those guys that you see him and you go, oh, that's an interesting looking guy.

And then he says, you know, they're great. Oh, God. Just mind-blowing. But what a set of pipes on that guy yeah what about these other actors uh dave madden henry gibson ruth bill daly i know you guys worked with these people hannah barbara worked with every one of those people every single one and they all um they all had a blast doing cartoons because they were – you know what? It's wonderful for young actors to hear this. Every one of those people was grateful to work.

That's nice. Period. End of story. Because Dave Madden to me was the manager – Ruben on the part of – Ruben Kincaid. Yeah. And I remember having an experience with George Hearn. Now, to me, I love Broadway stuff. George Hearn won Tony's for

La Cage and Sweeney Todd yeah and here's a guy who's the toast of Broadway so I'm working at Hanna-Barbera and I walked in

I think it was Smurfs or something and I said oh my god George Hearn's here today so we got to know each other we chatted he was a lovely guy

and I finally asked what I wanted to ask was essentially what the hell are you doing right right and so what a lesson he says uh well let me tell you something rob uh firstly i did uh sweeney todd with angela lansbury and angie's now doing murder she wrote so she's got me out here to do a three episode arc for which i'm very grateful and then gordon hunt who's directing the cartoons here good friend from uh theater and i'm happy to be here and i said well it's a pleasure and we're so grateful that you you know i'm so grateful that you took the time

and he let me say my piece and he said he's look here's how it works i've won a couple of tony's and so i can't take just any gig on Broadway. So I have to take a big gig. I have an apartment in the city and a home in Connecticut, and I need the money. So it never stops. It's a cool thing for actors to hear about Henry Gibson, Ruth Buzzi, all these people who became cultural icons in the 60s. Gary Owens. Yeah.

Who knew every story in Hollywood. And they just needed to keep working. It doesn't stop. There are very few Brad Pitts in the world, you know? These were not the days of $20 million for a movie. They were grateful to be working, man. Some of those people hadn't had a gig since Laugh-In. That's right.

That's crazy. And the person you met in an audition, Bob, was Orson Welles. At my first audition. What? First audition, Orson Welles. Dude. My first audition. I was sitting at Don Pitt's office, and Don Pitt was a talent agent, and in walks Orson

Welles, and sits next to me, and I'm looking at my script. Jesus Christ. And he sits next to me, and he smells like cigars and curdled cottage cheese. Oh, man. And then your line is, what, in give up show business? Right? And I could tell that he was rather moist because I could feel his essence next to me. But he looks over at my script.

Moist. I'm not Mo, but he looks over at my script. Moist. I'm not Mo, but he looks over at my script and he goes, I believe we're reading together. Would you like to rehearse?

Oh my God. And I'm like, oh yeah. What? I would love to rehearse. We go out in the lobby and we run through it and he goes,

that'll do. And we go into the booth and the booth is the size of this chair with one mic, not two. No, and you're standing next to a Petri dish. Well, we're facing each other because that's the only way we could both be on mic. And his stomach is on mine, resting on mine.

Man, what a story. When we're done, there's a round circle of sweat on my stomach, and I'm like, Welcome to showbiz. I will never, ever wash this shirt again. I've got Orson Welles DNA. Because you probably have to throw it out. It's a hazmat. Right, right, exactly.

Did you guys, I love that. Fantastic, Bob. Have you guys seen the videos? Mo's got them. The videos of Orson Welles doing the Paul Masson. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, sure. God, yeah.

He's utterly tanked. Absolutely. And I just, I love those. Because Moe does, ah, the French champagne is long. Was Wells aware of Maurice's impression of him? I don't think so. I don't know that Moe ever met Orson. Okay.

But to this day, you know, when Moe and I are together and stuff, I always compel him to do the, we know, remote farm and Lincoln Street. Well, of course. A pinky in the brain episode. Yeah, because he, it becomes a falsetto voice in those films where he goes, oh, the French. Yeah. Oh, it's just genius. And those poor kids, you know, these young actors going, oh, my God, I'm going to call my parents. I'm working with Orson Welles.

And, you know, they're waiting for the cue and the director and action. And then there's like 30 seconds. Isn't he supposed to say something? No. You start and the kid's waiting to pour the wine. Oh, my God. It's just genius. Whose idea was it to take the infamous

We Know a Farm where Mrs. Buckley lives and turn it into a pinky in the brain? Was that Ruger? Yeah, I think it was. And it was essentially like a $400,000 in-joke

because we came to work that day and it turned out to be a really very sweet circumstance. Mo had literally just come back from Sam Kinison's funeral they were very good pals and

so he made it to work and we all knew that he had a tough day and so we didn't we had not they

the producers had not sent Maurice the script so we were doing our you know open mic checks and stuff and

Maurice started to read it and and it was like oh my god wait a minute this is this is the the commercial this is the thing and and it was almost verbatim with the exception of the you know the nine words and it turned out great it just turned out great it's a brilliant piece of work oh it. And he must have just loved every second of that. He just sucked it up. It was great. I remember the day that Sam Kinison died. I was over at some manager's office, some big man. I think it was Kinison's manager. And the girl was looking through her files, and she took out a card and tossed it into the trash saying,

well, we won't be using this one anymore. And I reached in and it said Sam Kinison on it. Oh, dear. Boy, that's... What a metaphor for Hollywood. Yeah.

All right, let me throw two more names at you guys, people that we lost fairly recently. Carol Channing and Rip Taylor. I worked with them both on The Addams Family. I worked with Rip.

I didn't work with her. I did an animated version of, and John Astin. I did an animated version. We had John here. Oh, God. What a delightful guy. Sweet guy. And they did a 13-episode series of The Addams Family for Hanna-Barbera.

And Mr. Astin played Gomez. Grandmama was Carol Channing. Rip Taylor was Uncle Fester. It was unbelievable. And then, so they brought in these characters that played next-door neighbors, a la The Kravitzes on Bewitched, right? Yes. I don't know what the hell's going on in that house. And it was me and my wife was played by eddie

mcclurg oh yeah another talent and check this out this talk about great showbiz trivia the the actor who played our son was dick beals the voice of speedy alphysensor oh wow oh remember on Davy and Goliath, the voice of Davy. And Dick Beals, who played my son, was my parents' age. As you may recall, Dick Beals was just a small person, right? Born in 1927. And he spoke like this his whole life. That's how, you know, when you hear Davy and Goliath, Davy, Hal Smith was Goliath. That's right. And Davy was Dick Beals.

And Speedy Alka-Seltzer, Dick Beals. So here's a great story. Talk about being an enterprising young man. Dick writes a book called Perfect. Think big. So we get to work and Dick has a few books. And he said, I'd just like to thank you all very much. I've written a book and you're all, I'm really proud of this.

My association with Hanna-Barbera. Rob, would you like a copy of the book? I said, oh my God, Mr. Beals, thank you all very much. I've written a book and, and you're all that. We're very, I'm really proud of this. My association with Hannah Barbera, Rob, would you like a copy of the book? I said, Oh my God, Mr. Beals. Thank you so much.

And so he signs me to Rob, you know, good luck always Dick Beals. So I take the, thank you so much, Dick. Turn to walk away. That'll be,

that'll be 10 50. Oh, get out of here. Serious as a heart attack. And I said, Oh God. And I said, right? Oh, God. And of course, I wasn't going to, I wasn't going to argue with him.

I said, oh. Do you take credit cards? Check this out. So I said, oh, of course, Dick. So smart guy. He's already signed it, right? And I said, I'm so sorry. All I have is a 20.

Well, that's okay. I've got change. Genius. I know have is a 20. Well, that's okay. I've got change. Genius. I know what I'll do. I'll sucker the kid in. I'll make him feel good. I'll sign it to him, and then I'll hit him with it. You owe me $10.50, son.

It was great. Bob, what about you at the Christmas parades, Bob, the work in the grandstand? You met Jimmy Stewart, Mickey Rooney. What? Yeah, I did. For about 10 years, I was the grandstand announcer for the Hollywood Christmas Parade. You are a walking, you're a history book of Hollywood. All these things we didn't know about, Bob.

Well, it was pretty cool. I mean, my first year, Jimmy Stewart was the grand marshal. And I'm down on the street with the moving cars. And ladies and gentlemen, Jimmy Stewart. And I give him the mic. And he's got me by the arm. And the mic's on a cord is before cordless mics and he's just talking he goes yeah I'm here and Gloria's here and it's a wonderful

life and Harvey's here and and I'm starting to lose the slack of my cord because the car is moving the car is moving Mr. Mr. Mr. Mr. Stewart I'm losing my Mr. Stewart I'm losing I dropped the mic he's got me by the elbow he's got a death grip on my elbow and I'm walking my, Mr. Stewart, I'm losing my, I dropped the mic. It's got me by the elbow. He's got a death grip on my elbow. And I'm walking. How old was he at this time? 106. And I'm walking down Sunset Boulevard towards Highland. And I said, Mr. Stewart, you're talking to me.

You're talking to nobody right now. It's just you and me. Yeah, yeah, it's you and me and Harvey and Gloria. Pretty good. What about Mickey Rooney? Oh, God. Mickey Rooney was, I mean, I loved Mickey Rooney oh god Mickey Rooney was I mean I loved Mickey Rooney

he's one of my all time favorite entertainers but if you look at bullshit personally oh yeah I mean he tells

he tells me he was you know when I was a little boy I sat on Walt Disney's knee yeah and he said Mickey

I'm going to create a cartoon character after you. Oh, dear. So Mickey Mouse was him. Well, that's what he says. And the world according to Mickey Rooney, which none of it is true. Right.

But God bless Mickey Rooney. Oh, my God. He just needed to know that. I heard a story that Mickey Rooney, he was doing a show somewhere, and his big thing, and this was like all the workers would gather around hey mickey's doing it again and and mickey would be on a wall phone uh and he'd be like fucking some chorus girl against the wall while talking to his wife over the phone. Oh, my God. Well, I have to say that, by and large,

I have to say I've never heard good things about her. No, no. You won't on this show. Yeah. I just want to know, did Mickey Rooney record that conversation like I did with Marlboro? Yeah, I want to hear that. Exactly.

Well, you know, in anime, we did a song that goes, It's a great big universe, and we're all really puny. We're just tiny little specks about the size of Mickey Rooney. There you go. Great. Fantastic. We will return to Gilbert Gottfried's amazing colossal podcast after this. Let's just, because it was in the intro and because Gilbert is obsessed with the bad voices on the old Beatles cartoons.

Oh, yeah. And this is obviously before Jess came along because he could knock Ringo out of the park. He really could, yeah. But he was probably not even born. But it's Paul Freese turns out to be the guy who was doing John Lennon. Oh, my God. Yeah. But he was doing Toucan Sam.

He was doing Toucan Sam. So Gilbert says on this show, he sounds like that. He's doing Ronald Coleman. It's like, hey, Paul George, let's have a little adventure. Oh, my God. Do you know who the other actors were? I have no idea. I think it was only two of them doing all four voices.

There was a woman. There was a woman? Yeah, one of them was a woman. Probably. Yeah, I didn't write down her name. I never knew that. I mean, I watched that show because I was part of Beatlemania. Sure.

But I had no... You were a rock and roll guy. Yeah. Yeah. Now, I'm getting a mental block. I hate when this happens. The voice of the Wizard of Oz. Frank Morgan.

Frank Morgan, yeah. So was Frank Morgan what you were doing for Captain Crunch? Oh, that's a good question. Was Dawes doing that? Most of Dawes' characters were impressions of classic actors. Yeah, well, Ed Wynn. Well, Wally Gator with Ed Wynn. Yeah.

And Snagglepuss was Bert Larey. Bert Larey. Yeah. He might have been. Captain Crutch. Oh, yeah. Captain Crutch. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

Who rang that bell? I don't know. I think Billy's doing a little Frank. Isn't Billy adding a little Frank Nelson to one of those Futurama characters? Yes, he is. Frank Nelson, yes. And one of them. Frank Nelson. Yeah, one of them, Billy. It was funny. It does that one

Dr. Warburg or something. Well, one of them's a little bit of Luja Kobe. I think it's Luja Kobe meets Georgia Jessel. And I think Frank Morgan is in one of the other characters, if I'm not mistaken. With the meat hanging from his feet. Leave the markets on my shangri-

Yeah. That was... He was. Because he talks about how he... Zoidberg. He takes that... Right. Zoidberg.

Zoidberg. Because he takes that Lou Jacoby in the Diary of Anne Frank. Correct. Right. Because he's, you know, what's the name? Zutty or something like that. He's a,

I stole from the children. Yes. I stole the food from the children. And he takes that and mashes it. Makes it a wacky, zany cartoon reference.

Right. He mashes it with Georgie Jessel. Georgie Jessel. Have you heard Gilbert's Jessel? Makes it a wacky zany cartoon reference. Right. He mashes it with... Georgie Jessel. Georgie Jessel. Have you heard Gilbert's Jessel? No, let me hear it. Go ahead, Gil. Okay.

Hello, mama? This is Georgie. You know your son Georgie? The one that sends you the checks every... Oh, yeah, now you remember. So did you get that parrot I sent you? What? You ate the parrot?

That parrot spoke seven different languages. Oh, he should have said something. That's great. Bravo. You got that down. That's great. Oh, my God. That's a big call for it these days.

Yes. The kids love it. Who did the voice of Boris Karloff in Gods and Monsters? Oh, my God. That's interesting. It wasn't Maurice? No, not that I know of. We'll have to check into that.

I will have to check that out because I don't really know. I mean, that's a great question. Was it Bob McFadden that used to do the Karloff voice? The guy that did the Frankenberry and Count Chocula? Do I have the name right? Oh, that's right. It could have been because that was right up his alley. See, but I don't even know.

Who was it that did Monster Mash? Do you know who did the voice of? Bob the Singer? I was thinking of Bobby Boris. Yeah, Bobby Boris. Yeah, he would have been gone by then. Yeah, but I never knew who did the voice of that in that song. And the ones in Gods and Monsters was a more natural. Everybody does like, I'm working now.

Yeah. Everyone does that. Yeah. But he didn't. That was Boris Karloff doing Thriller. Yeah. Yes. Not Michael Jackson.

Yes. His old, it's a thriller. I mean, and Grinchy. But if you heard him on Conversations, oh my God, he sounded nothing. No, he's very erudite. Very sweet, gentle. Like, what's his name? Jonathan Harris.

You ever worked with Jonathan Harris? Oh, I worked with him. Jonathan Harris. I worked with that guy a hundred times. What a gas. Oh my God. I said to him, so Mr. Harris, what part of England are you from? He goes, I'm not British, dear boy.

I'm affected. Yes. Is he from the Bronx? Yeah, he was from Brooklyn. He was a Jew. He said, I'm a Brooklyn Jew and proud of it. That's right. And he referred to his wife as the old dragon.

Oh, my God. He was in the Bill Dana show. Oh, yeah. wife as the old dragon oh my god he was in the bill dana show oh yeah he uh he was in the original broadway cast of uh tea house of the august moon very good unbelievable oh i love they once made a cartoon a problem child yeah and instead of jack wharton as says big uh big I should remember the name so that people in Problem Child Big Sam or Big Alley, whatever.

They got Jonathan Harris. Oh my God. Did you work with him or did you work separately? This time I was lucky enough to do one episode with him. At that time I, I think Howard Stern was always talking about wanting to get Jonathan Harris. He was great.

And I said to Jonathan Harris, and I said, would you ever do the Howard Stern? And he goes, never. Of course he did. He sounded like Dr. Smith all the time. He did. And he, you know,

don't talk to me, you sanctimonious bucket of boots. Oh, the pain. It was so over the top. But I did a cartoon series with him called Channel Umpty Three.

We did 13 episodes. Alice Ghostly. Yeah. Oh, my God. Oh, it was just, I think it's probably on YouTube now, but oh, Jesus, every week for about a year,

not a year, six months, and doing ADR and post-production, and he always had these wonderful stories about, you know, the old Hollywood. In fact, he was telling a story about, get this, the rap party for lifeboat with Tallulah Bankhead and Estelle Winwood at the rap party. So he said, I'd like to tell you a true story.

Absolutely true. I swear as God is my witness. I walked into the left, the party of a lifeboat and I see, and I got to use this nasty word but it's true the C word right

I see these two C words in the corner holding court you know they're awful people awful people and the young man

walked up very drunk he says he goes he walks up to a to a Tallulah Bankhead

young Randolph Scott looking type and he walks up and he says Miss Bankhead I should Randolph Scott looking type. And he walks up and he says, Miss Bankhead, I should like to fuck you. And she takes his hand and she says,

and so you shall, dear boy. And they march upstairs together. True story. Oh my God. Fantastic. He's stealing

Dick Cavett's story. And so you shall, dear boy. That's Dick Cavett's story about Chico. Is that right? Is that right? He probably stole it from Chico and Cavett Dick Cavett's story about Chico. Is that right? Is that right? He probably stole it

from Chico and Cavett. But it was so great because he told it with his... Hilarious. Through the pain. I remember when they did that movie

New York Stories. Uh-huh. And the Woody Allen one had... Oh, Mae Questel. Mae Questel. Mae Questel. Betty Boop.

An olive oil. Right, an Olive Oil. And Little Audrey. She was hysterical in that. Here are the voice actors from the Beatle cartoon. Paul Freese was John and George. Lance Percival, who was a British actor. He was in the Carry On series.

He was a British comedian. And he did a lousy English accent. Right. He did Paul and Ringo. And Julie Bennett and Carol Corbett. Julie Bennett. You must have worked with Julie Bennett. Julie Bennett.

I never worked with her, but she did a lot of Warner Brothers voices. When Mel Blanc was only able to get the sole screen credit because he asked for a raise in the 40s and they wouldn't give him a raise. And he said, can I have screen credit? And they're like, well, that doesn't cost us anything. She's in Hey There, It's Yogi Bear in 64. There we go. And Gay Paris in 62. Juliei in 62 yeah how about that and was was richard o'brien the i think i think that was his name the original voice of elmer fudd oh arthur q brian brian yeah brian yeah yes

and then a lot of radio that over right so ar Arthur Q. Bryan died in the middle of the production of What's Opera, Doc? Oh, wow. Yeah. 1959. And Mel Blanc has one word in that as Elmer Fudd. You know, he's like, whitening, stwype. And then all of a sudden, Elmer Fudd goes, smog. And Arthur Q. Bryan was so ill, he couldn't get the energy out.

So Mel screams out, smog. And then Hal Smith took over for Elmer Fudd for a few cartoons and then Mel did them I think until he passed away. Because I, what's opera doc is he? Genius. Quintessential. In fact, I didn't even, I'm a, I love classical music and that was my introduction to Wagner because I didn't realize that it was Ride of the Valkyries.

No, it's called Kill the Wabbit. We all know that. This is great. You guys want to take a whack at this crazy thing? Oh, please. Oh, please. This is so cool.

With Iago and Pinky and Porky. Is this your idea, Frank? Because it's genius. Well, I thank you. You're very kind. I did a lot of searching for something that had

three performers in it. Oh, no. This is perfect. So I think the audience will recognize this movie. It is rather iconic. Okay, great. This isn't a cold read.

This is a frozen read. I apologize for its length, but I have every confidence it's going to gain momentum. You know what? At my age, any time, I apologize for its length. Hey, the room looks wonderful from here. Okay. All right. Thank you very much.

Let me take a... Oh, can I have one simple water? Sure. Hang on. Gilbert needs to hyd can I have one simple water? Sure. Hang on, Gilbert needs to hydrate. We all need to hydrate. Professional operation. Yeah. The listeners should recognize the movie.

Okay. You ready, Gil? Yes. All right, fire away. Um, Sonny, we ought to hear what they have to say. No, no, no. No more. Not this time, Consul Yerry.

No more meetings. No more discussions. No more Saloso tricks. You give them one message. I want Saloso If not, it's all out war We go to the mattresses Well, yes, but some of the other families won't sit still for all out war

They may hand me Saloso Your father would not want to hear this. This is business. It's not personal. They shot my father? It's business, your ass. Well, even shooting of your father was business. It's not personal, sonny.

Well, then, business will have to suffer, all right? And listen, do me a favor, Tom. No more advice on how to patch things up. Just help me win, please, all right? I found out about this Captain McCluskey who broke Mike's jaw. Now, he's definitely on Sollozzo's payroll and for big money. McCluskey has agreed to be the Turks' bodyguard. What you have to understand, Sonny, is that while Salozzo's being guarded like he was invulnerable, now nobody has ever gunned down a

New York police captain. Never. It would be disastrous. All the five families would come after you, Sonny. The Corleone family would be outcast. Even the old man's political protection would run for cover. So do me a favor, Narf. Take this into consideration. All right. We'll wait. I can't wait.

Huh? I said I can't wait. I don't care what Siloso says about the deal. He's going to kill my daddy. That's it. That's the key for him. You've got to get Sellozo.

You've got to get Sellozo. What's his name? Let me ask you something, Professor. I mean, what about this McCluskey? What do we do with this cop here? They want to have a meeting with me, right? It'll be me, McCluskey, and that other guy. Let's set a meeting.

Get our informants to find out where it's going to be held. Now, we can set up a public bar or restaurant. Some place where there's a lot of people there to feel safe. They're going to search me when I first meet them, right? So I can't have a weapon on me. But if Clemenza... That sounds like a venereal disease. But if Clemenza can figure out a way to have a weapon planted there for me,

then I'll kill them. I'll kill them, but they're both dead. And now the slow laughter breaks out. Ha, ha, ha! Ha, ha, point! Ha, ha! Hey, what are you going to do? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Frank. Cause he slapped you in the face a little bit, huh? What do you think this is? The army where you shoot them and a mile away? You gotta get close like this. Bada bing. You blow their brains all over your nice ivory league suit. You're taking it very personal.

Tom, this is business. This man is taking it very personal. Oh, dear. Come on, Mikey. Tom, wait a minute. I'm talking about a cop that's mixed up in drugs. I'm talking about a dishonest cop, a crooked cop, who got mixed up in the rackets and got, what was it, coming to him.

That's a terrific story. Now, we have any newspaper people on the payroll, don't we, Tom? They might make a story like that. Well, you know, now that you mention it, they might. Yeah, they just might. It's not personal, Sonny. It's strictly, it's strictly, oh, it's murder. Frank Santopadre, ladies and gentlemen.

There we go. Well done, Frank. Oh, my God. Gilbert, that was so great. Now, there are people out there going, I will never be able to watch The Godfather ever again. No, there are fans out there right now animating this as we speak. Somebody's going to animate this.

Let's hope so. I feel like I can get together with the two of you and just do Godfather 1, 2, and 3. There we go. Let's do it. Why not? And, you know, all of us at different conventions and stuff, we get to do similar things that not to this level. Frank, that was really a genius.

Oh, I'm glad you thought so. Yeah, it was just trying to find something iconic that people would recognize that had three parts. When you do that, it's just the coolest thing in the world. We've done the Princess Bride. We've done Dirty Dance. There's one of the bookers who has a lot of our... Jeff Zanini. He'll have a

wheel. He'll spin the wheel and whatever movie it lands on, he'll be like, okay, Rob, we got Star Wars. You're Luke Skywalker. Yeah, it's like, Darth Vader, we have a prisoner. Exactly. It's just so much fun. And Porky Pig,

you're Princess Leia. Help me, I'll be one. Help me, I'll be one. What am I, a hologram? Or forget it.

Let's do these plugs. Jake, it's Chinatown. That's right. I love that. Remaking Chinatown. Oh, man. Let's plug Rob's wonderful book. Gil? Oh, yeah. It's called Voice Lessons. That's right. Remaking Chinatown. Let's plug Rob's wonderful book.

Gil? Oh, yes. It's called Voice Lessons. It's terrific. It's a book about gratitude. Rob Paulson, Voice Lessons. How a couple of ninja turtles, Pinky, and an animaniac saved my life. You know what?

That's not hyperbole. It's the freaking truth. Thank you, guys, for bringing thatle. It's the freaking truth. I, thank you guys for bringing that up. I, I, what's that axiom? We make plans

and God laughs. Sure. Three years ago, I feel a little lump under my neck and it turns out to be stage three throat cancer.

And you guys have been kind enough to have me on and chat about it before, but it's not about that. We all got our stuff. We all know that. You know,

Gil was kind enough to, to focus on some of the children he's had contacts with. Right now, I mean, Jesus, right now somebody's getting a phone call about their baby. Somebody's getting a phone call about their wife. Somebody's getting a phone call about a 27-year-old father who just had a child. And so I'd already had this incredible career, had a wonderful family, but I didn't die. What I did was get the daylight speed out of me because of the treatment. But now, and Bob and I were just talking about this, we've had wonderful careers, but in the context of Hollywood, it's not a big deal.

We're just lucky that we've been working. But when you're able to have an experience like this that I certainly wouldn't recommend to anybody. However, if you got to go through it, you come out with a impossibly deep sense of not only gratitude, but empathy. So we now have the experience where I can now go to sit with someone or talk to them or hold their hand or whatever, metaphorically or otherwise. And when I say, boy, I know, I know. ever metaphorically or otherwise and when i say boy i know i know and it turns out and i was just on um uh dr drew's show on kbc and he said you know rob i often talk to people who say gosh you know it's turned out that i have the gift of cancer or the gift of fill in the blank because

if you're able to contextualize what a problem is, what struggle means, it turns out that you can really be helpful. And in my case, it was as a result of this book in the context of these characters. Because all of us here have been fortunate enough to work on shows that bring utter joy to people. utter joy to people. And so now, due to nice folks like you, opportunities to do some public speaking, it turns out that I have this bully pulpit from which I can tell my story. And then, like you're talking about, people come up to us at these events through tears telling me, thank you for sharing your story about throat cancer. Let me tell you about my brother who just died of liver cancer, but he fought as long as he

could, but the last six months of his life, every day that he would have this particular treatment that was very difficult for him, but it kept him around for another holiday. We all had our watches on alarms because we had a little piece of Ninja Turtle memorabilia every time that this young man would go through his treatment. So every day I had my turtle action figure in my pocket or my turtle bandana because my brother who just passed away at 37 lived for the Ninja Turtles. And so turtles will mean more to my family than you'd ever know. And that's what I'm learning as a result of the book.

So thanks for talking about it. Turtles will mean more to my family than you'd ever know. And that's what I'm learning as a result of the book. Good for you. So thanks for talking about it. One of the touching things in the book, too, is your friendships, is Maurice and Tress and Sean Astin and Randy. And now everybody was there for you. Totally. And you know who your friends are when the chips are down. Yeah, and the truth is that my wife and I decided not to talk about it too much

because there was no point. Again, everybody's got their shit. I got to tell you, I saw you, I don't know if it was an audition or a job, and I'd heard. Oh. And I didn't know. Yeah. And I felt terrible. Well, of course, but Bob, you didn't know because we didn't tell anybody.

But you were just saying that nobody knew. Sure. And all I kept thinking was, and you know, I've known Rob for 30-something years. Long time. We're not like, we don't break bread every day. No, but we're good friends. We're buddies. Sure.

And I just felt, oh my God, I wasn't there for my friend. Not at all. But you guys needed your space. You needed to deal with your time. Yeah. But I agree with you guys. This book, and I read it right after I started signing. It is brilliant.

Thank you. It's also got a lot of humor. It does, because it's about that. In fact, my radiation oncologist, the first time I met him, Dr. Henry Ampulski, comes and says, Mr. Paulson, it's a pleasure to meet you. I know what you do for a living. I'm sure we can help you. I don't know if you'll be able to. We're pretty sure we can cure you, but before we do, we almost have to kill you.

I started laughing because he reminded me of like a cheesy goldfinger. Akeem Tamaroff. Yes, Akeem Tamaroff. Right. Why, Mr. Valle? You have to talk to him. Paul Sweeney, do you expect me to say no? No, Mr. Pinky.

I expect you to be cured. But anyway, thank you. Because due to my wonderful friend, Mike Fleeman, who's the real guy who did all the heavy lifting, it turned out to be a good book. I'm really proud of it. It's funny too, as Bob says. Thank you. It was his idea to open up the book, audio and in print, with Pinky getting the news broken to him that I had cancer. And so I say, just Pinky, I got to chat with you about something. Is it bad news, Rob?

Well, it kind of, yes. Oh, no, is Rosie O'Donnell back on network TV? It's not that, it's that. Well, what is it? What is it? Well, let me put it this way. Am I soaking in it? I don't know.

Let's put it this way. I'm not a cancer. I'm a Pisces, although it seems What is it? Well, let me put it this way. Am I soaking in it? I don't know. Let's put it this way. I'm not a Cancer. I'm a Pisces, although it seems I have it. You have Cancer? Well, yeah. Are you going to die? I don't know. Maybe.

Well, who's going to pay for this fucking car? You know? And that, what you guys are doing right now is music to our, I mean, we're all in the comedy business. And, you know, to be able to laugh, as we all do, and then you get to meet these people, as we've all discussed today, who have kept in touch with us. Gilbert's great story about the man patting the picture of his son. It turns out that these characters that we've all been involved in have a deeply personal, utterly positive effect on all of them, even through the impossibility of burying your child. I will never know what that's like, thank God. And people do it every day.

And then they get up the next goddamn day and they put on their shoes and they soldier on. So I now have these examples of profiles and courage that I never would have had otherwise, and that's what the book is about. The book is about how powerful this humor is. Well, congratulations. Thank you very much. I mean, to all three of you for using your gifts. Thank you. It's a pleasure.

In such a way. Let's get the plugs in, too. There's a new Looney Tunes shorts. A pile of them. A pile of them are coming. 200 new shorts. Jesus, can I have a bag of money? Dude, I'm so blessed.

Because it looks like you're looking at a 1940s Bob Clanton. They look so good. Full orchestra. Can't wait to see them. We've got one. It's called Curse of the Monkey Bird that's out for Oscar consideration. Nice. It's played in the theater.

So thank you, Frank. Well, I was literally talking about, I got to stop dropping names. Bob De Niro told me that. But I had lunch yesterday with Sam Register, president of Warner Brothers Animation. And man, did he go on about you and those shorts. Oh, bless his heart. That's great. I mean, they're killer.

And what's happening with the Animaniacs reboot? Well, we're coming back as a result of the largesse of Mr. Spielberg and Hulu and Warner Brothers. Animaniacs and Pinky and the Brain are coming back next year, I guess about this time. But as we all know, it's a brave new world. The way programming happens on Hulu and Netflix is kind of like, I guess, yeah, we'll put them on sometime. We don't know when. We don't have to worry about, you know, we're not beholden to advertisers. So we'll put them on sometime. We don't know when. We don't have to worry about – we're not beholden to advertisers. So we'll put them up next year.

But it is so exciting to know that the king of Hollywood has said, hey, I think we should do this again. That's a really big deal for anybody. Moreover, when you get Mr. Spielberg to be able to say this show has really had an impact on on people and not with respect to merchandising it's really not like ninja turtles you know it's a show like like looney tunes that affects people viscerally and it's art for the sake of the art and so to be able to do it again with mr spielberg at that level and my buddies uh is just uh a gift that i don't even know how to quantify i want to plug to your live show i want to plug plug you and Randy and Animaniacs Live. I brought my wife down to Joe's Pub to see you guys,

and it's a magnificent show. So I hope you keep doing that. We will. And I'll tell you, it's glorious fun. You folks can have a check on it. Check it out. It's at AnimaniacsInConcert.com. I think either that or Animaniacs Live.

And it doesn't matter. You can find it both ways. But you'll get a chance to see the music that Randy Rogel wrote. And Randy is a genius. I don't mind saying that. He truly is. And people ask me all the time. They go, oh, my God, you did that Countries of the World song in one take?

I did. But I had a week to rehearse it, and I had the music in front of me. Look, we live in Hollywood. You guys are in New York. You can walk down the street and throw in dark and hit a good singer i'm good at my job but a lot of people could sing it writing that shit no no no he's he's he's truly gifted way different so yeah thank you very much come see animaniacs in concert it's cool all right boys and my god we could go on for days oh christ so Christ. This was so much fun, you guys. Could we ever. Oh, man. Thank you.

And you mentioned a few times Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Yeah. I was on three episodes of- I know. You played Krang Prime. Yes. The Krang, no. Yes.

You and Roseanne. Yeah. Roseanne played- Oh, boy. She played like the Krang boss lady and you were Krang subprime and let me tell you

when we went into work and we said who's going to be playing this and they said Gilbert Godfrey we just all of us Seth Green played Leo I played Raph Sean Astin Raphael I played Don donatello in that iteration greg sipes played michelangelo everybody freaked out and it worked great it was inspired casting

have you seen it i haven't seen it yet oh gill please i think i think it's on nickelodeon or you can certainly go on nick uh the nick website or you can probably even go to YouTube. But you got to see your episodes because it turned out great. I'll have to watch it. It's really good. We'll do another one of these down the line, gents, because there's so much more to cover. Thank you, guys. Thank you for giving us so much time. It's a party with you two.

And God bless the two of you for everything you said about the Aflac firing. Oh, buddy. Thanks, pal. Well, we're in this together, buddy. There you go. Thank you. And nodded off. Although I'd like to try Aflac.

That's not as good as it is. Can a duck stutter? Sure, try that. Af-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a- You hear that, ladies and gentlemen? Listen to that. That sound is worth its weight in platinum. God bless you guys. I say laughter is the best medicine. The cool thing is you can't OD and the refills are free, and it's so goddamn true.

Thank you, guys. Thank you both. This is always a kick for us. Happy holidays. We you, guys. Thank you both. This is always a kick for us. Happy holidays. We love having you. We've been having a great time with Bob Bergen and Rob Paulson. This has been Gilbert Gottfried's amazing, colossal podcast. We don't know what to call it anymore.

Yeah, we don't know. And with my co-host, Frank Santopadre. And thank the two of you. This was too much fun. Thanks, guys. That's all. Everybody lives on a street in a city or a village or a town for what it's worth. And they're all inside a country which is part of a continent

that sits upon a planet known as Earth. And the Earth is a ball full of oceans and some mountains which is out there spinning silently in space. And living on that Earth are the plants and the animals and also the entire human race. It's a great big universe

and we're all really puny. We're just tiny little specks about the size of Mickey Rooney. It's big and black and icky and we are small and dinky It's a big universe and we're not And we're part of a vast interplanetary system stretching 700 billion miles long With nine planets and a sun, we think the Earth's the only one that has life on it, although we could be wrong Across the interstellar voids are a billion asteroids, including meteors and Halley's Comet 2.

And there's over 50 moons floating out there like balloons in a panoramic trillion-mile view. And still it's all a speck amid a hundred billion stars in a galaxy we call the Milky Way. It's 60,000 trillion miles from one end to the other, and still that's just a fraction of the way. Cause there's a hundred billion galaxies that stretch across the sky, filled with constellations, planets, moons, and stars. And still the universe extends to a place that never ends, which is maybe just inside a little jar.

It's a great big universe, and we're all really puny. We're just tiny little specks of the size of Mickey Rooney. Though we don't know how it got here, we're an important part here. It's a big universe and it's ours. Thank you.