Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - GGACP Classic: Horror Movie Taglines with Mike McPadden

Episode Date: August 21, 2025

The GGACP team celebrates the birthday of their late, great colleague Mike "McBeardo" McPadden (b. August 21) by revisiting this deep-dive into Mike's favorite taglines from classic (and non-classic) horror films. Also in this episode: The cinema of Marjoe Gortner! “Humanoids from the Deep”! Henry Fonda goes slumming! And Elvis’ favorite Christmas flick! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Here's another Gilbert and Franks Here's another Gilbert in Franks Colossal Classic Hi, this is Gilbert and Godfried, and this is Gilbert, will this be an obsestious? It's whatever you like it to be, Maestro. We'll call it colossal obsessions because it's, yeah, it's short. This is Gilbert and Frank's amazing. colossal obsessions

with my co-host Frank Santopadre and we have someone that we're both familiar with Mike McFadden. Not all that familiar with my last name. Let's retake that.

Mike McFoidle. Michael Michael Floydle Madele. Michael Flieson, Haver. It's Mike McPadden.

Mike McPaddy. With a No, no. Michael Patti, Waddy. Michael. Oh, my God. Every day, it seems like I'm doing this show from the home. It gets closer and closer to that experience.

Did you eat all your pudding? Yeah. They brought you pudding. You didn't finish it. Or the homeless. Yeah. Mike McBeardo. I love that he got the McBeardo part, but Mike McBeardo, McPadden, P-A-D-D,

the illustrated man himself the illustrated man yes he is and uh he is uh also our uh our social media director and our facebook uh what would you call yourself facebook guru you say guru and i like that title i got the long beard guru facebook sensei yes and uh what happened uh you you were listening to an episode gilbert was rambling on about taglines and you got inspired of nowhere yeah Gilbert, and this was long ago and many times since, brought up the mutilator, a Buddy Cooper film. A who, a who film? Yes. Buddy Cooper.

Oh, Buddy Cooper. His father died in my basement. The tagline was by knife, by axe, by pick, by by. So you got inspired by Gilbert, and he wasn't just the mutilator. He remembers taglines from movie. Territrain. What was the Territrain one you remember? Oh, Territrain was the boys and girls.

from Sigma Phi, some will live and some will die. That's right. That's correct. That was another one, yeah, that blew my mind, yes. How do these stay with you over the years? I don't know. I always love taglines. Harry Cole is the best in the business.

Three people are dead because of him. Oh, the conversation. And, oh, what was the... Oh, this one already says the name and the title. But when you see the swimmer, will you see yourself? Nice. The swimmer. The swimmer.

A movie that comes up a lot on this show. And on every street in every city in the country, there's a nobody who dreams of being a somebody. Ooh. Now, what is that? What is that? Facing the crowd or something? Taxi drive. Taxi drive.

Oh, taxi drive. Wow. Wow. How do you retain these damn things? You know, we have Mike's list. I'm going to put together my own list for a future episode of favorite taglines. And we'll do that down the line. But for now, we're going to do the ones that Mike compiled. And you have little stories about these, little histories. I do. And also, this is, if I may get a plug in. Please do. These are insane horror movie taglines of the 70s and 80s, many of which are connected to movies in my book. Heavy Metal Movies. You don't say. You are the author of Heavy Metal Movies. Terrific book.

Which also features a long rave review of Highway to Hell with Gilbert Gottfried as Hitler. Oh, geez. Now you're just sucking up. And where can people get this book, Pray Tell. You can get the book wherever books are shoplifted, but also Amazon and heavy metal. If you go to Heavy Metal Movies.com, you get a patch and an artisanal Brooklyn crafted barf bag. Wow. Well, I'll have to go there. Did you send a copy to Gilbert? Because you know he won't spring for one.

Yes, I'm holding up the barf bag. Yes, you gave me. Yeah. Heavy metal movies. It's terrific, Reed. And well researched. I've given Gilbert several barf bags and reasons to barf, but no, I think I gave you a couple of copies of the place. Well, take us through a couple of these. I mean, the first one is a tagline that everybody knows and is probably along with Jaws. Or I guess it was Jaws 2, which was the one where... Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the war. What was the Jaws tagline?

Do we remember that one? Geez, it didn't even have one. But this one is very famous. This was sort of nicknamed Jaws in space. And this is from Alien in 1979. And that was in space, no one can hear you scream. And is that, that's arguably the most famous movie poster. I would say so.

Yeah. And it was actually, designed by a guy named Philip Gipps, who also designed the Rosemary's Baby poster. That's cool. That weird space egg. Yeah, yeah. The line was written by his wife,

Barbara Gipps. I love this. The line came from copyrighter Barbara Gipps, who was married to Philip Gipps, who was also part of a New York ad agency called Frankfurt Gips Ballkind, which is where I met my wife. Wow. Geez. Her Rosa chiming in. And he did the

Superman poster, the iconic with the shirt open. opening. Wow. Why? Very cool. Six degrees of vertirosa. Verterosa. Oh, my God, Frank, you beat me to it. What else you got on here? How about some, okay, how about, I'll run some of these by Gilbert and we'll see if he can remember. Yeah. Okay. If this movie doesn't make your skin crawl, it's on too tight. Oh, that sounds so familiar. I'll give him a hint, 1974, directed by the director of Porky's Bob Clark, the late Bob Clark, who died tragically, I might add.

Yes. I also made a Christmas story. He made a Christmas story. And one of my fan of favorite Sherlock Holmes picture called Murder by Decree. Terrific movie, which people should see. With James Mason. Oh, this movie, I think you stumped him.

Yeah. I think so. That would be Black Christmas. You know, our listeners are screaming at their devices. Of course. Yeah. Elvis Presley was reportedly a huge fan of Black Christmas. Okay.

Now, I have always heard this. And then in doing research, I know Frank, you often say like the IMDB is like full of shit. Well, it's not entirely trustworthy. I shouldn't say it. Okay,

I take that back. Somebody not Frank has said this. Yes. So I always heard Elvis was a fan. And it said on IMDB that he watched it every Christmas. Now, the movie came out in 74. He was dead before Christmas.

By 77. Yeah. Every Christmas being both of them. Yeah. cross. Wow. Oh, yes. And he used to say, I don't want to be locked out of heaven on the technicality. Wow. That's a great line. He was eye on dope when he said that. And peanut butter and dexedrine sandwiches. What's the next one? Okay. Now, this one, I know Gilbert knows because this is truly the one that I flipped out. Okay. He is a depraved, sadistic rapist, a homicidal

killer. And he makes house calls. Dill? This wasn't Dr. Giggles. Oh, no. Dr. Wait, Dr. Medical Deviant. Yeah. Yeah.

Dr. Dr. Something medical dee. Dr. Butcher. Right. Dr. Butcher. Medical Deviant. Yes. This was one of those movies.

A real Guinea production. Oh, absolutely. I take offense. That, like, the name on it was something like John Martin. We looked it up. It was some, it was some Paizano director with it. With, like, with like 5,000 syllables in it. All of them owes.

Yeah, I like that movie. So, I actually, I actually queued up a little bit of the trailer. Go ahead. And I'll hit play. Let's see if you can guess This is a very famous actor Who did a lot of Horror and Exploitation

Trailer voice. Okay. Okay, here we go. ...lines of medicine for his own maniacal means. That's all I'm breaking glass. Dr. Butcher, MD, medical deviant. You will die

Only to live again in a younger body. Then you can tell me if the operation was a success. Okay, so. You know who that narrator of that trailer was, Gil? That sounds so familiar. That was Adolf Caesar. Oh, Adolf Caesar.

Oh, my God. He did a bunch of those back then. Soldiers story. He did Blacula, Dawn of the Dead, scream, Blackula, Scream. Good stuff. Yeah, oh, the best, yeah. All right, what's the next one?

Next one, we got, oh, there we go. When there's no more room in hell, the dead will walk the earth. Gil? Yeah, that was Dawn of the Dead. That is correct. That was dawn of the death. That reminds me of a Drew Friedman strip, but I'll tell people about it on Facebook. We will return to Gilbert Gottfried's amazing colossal podcast after this. I'm here for Bet Rivers Online Casino and Sportsbook with poker icon Phil Helmuth.

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Quiet night in on Friday. It's good to have a really. routine. And it's good for your eyes too. Because with regular comprehensive eye exams at Specsavers, you'll know just how healthy they are. Visit Spexavers.cavers.cai to book your next eye exam. Eye exams provided by independent optometrists. And now back to the show. Penn Gillette's number one favorite film of all time? Yes. And the 2004 remake is his number 12 favorite film of it. That is good trivia. Wow. That was that was a fun movie. It was. It kept the horror in it but it was also very funny some parts and a shout out to former podcast guest

tom savini oh that's right oh yeah his masterpiece wonderful work on that one okay here's another great one for you gill and i'll give you a clue with one of my tattoos today the pond tomorrow the world piranha frogs frogs oh with raymond oh my god With Raymond and the hero was, like, the groovy, ecological hippie hero was Marjo Gortner. Marjo Gortner. Now, there's a guy who would be a guest. He was in food. He was also in Food of the God.

He was, yes, which is also an American International Pictures film, part of the revenge of nature cycle of the 70s that also included Night of the Leapis. Oh, that's all the rabbits. Yes. The giant rapids. Stuart Women. And squirm with the worms coming out of the shower. Oh, yes. Sure, sure, sure.

And Piranha directed by guest Joe Dante. Joe Dante. That's right. That's right. And the swarm. Don't forget, unless we ever forget the swarm, I would put in there too. We've had so many guests on this show already. Was Henry Fonda in the swarm?

He sure was. Yes. He's the scientist who injects himself with the anti-B. Whatever the hell it is. The anti-B serum. The sake of humanity, he sacrificed this. I love when these actors are at that, oh, I don't give a fuck anymore. He was in another movie around that time called City on Fire.

It was just like they just ran out of disasters. It was just a fire. You know, we've had so many guests on the show. I look at these lists and there, you know, there's Peronana, Joe Dante, the swarm, Lee Grant, Savini. You've got somebody else coming up that was on the show. We've had so many people on this show Oh, it's amazing

They're just starting to cross-reference Okay, here's one I know even Go ahead Be afraid, be very afraid Hill Ah, the fly Correct Very good

Very, very good Pretty good remake A terrific movie, I think Yeah, Kronenberg's a great talent Yeah, I mean, I think two separate films I mean, it doesn't, Vincent Price cameo Would have been nice and would have ruined it

So I don't know what we could have. Yeah. I like Cronenberg. I like naked lunch. I like the dead zone. Video drum. I like so many of his. Oh, with Deborah Harris. Yes. Yeah. And, and James Woods. And, and, but the fly too sucked to high. horrible with Eric Stolt. Yes. Oh, that sucks. I love that you saw the fly and the fly too. Okay. Here's another one. This is what I know. Gilbert knows the night he came home. Oh,

Halloween. That's right. Very good. Very good. And Halloween, too, was more of the night he came home. Yes. That was the tag life? Yeah. They obviously really didn't give a fuck at that point. They had three years.

Yeah. They probably, it seems like at the last second before they, had a chance to do and they oh we need a tagline I don't know some more of the night he care okay the night he came home and then

some yeah okay here's another great one okay this movie I remember they're not human but they hunt human women not for killing for mating oh yeah I've seen this picture I'm proud to say

not invaders for Mars it's a corpsman It's a Corman. It's a Corman job. Humanoids from the deep. Oh, my God. Yeah. A film that Joe Dante passed on directing.

I was thinking of that movie because I remember I saw it in a theater. I saw it in Times Square. And that's the one where the humanoids are fucking the girl victims. They all look like big rubber frog people. And they, grabbing women on the beach and fucking them. And the first scene has a ventriloquish dummy in it, inexplicably. Yeah. I just found it.

And they were like, oh, let's put this in the movie. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, oh, I found this in my closet. You know, that's a big theme. And they're like the, first of all, it's like a regular 50s horror rubber monster movie. Yes. Yeah.

There's all this like rape and nudity and insanity. And that was a thing for a while. early 80s, because it was Galaxy of Terror with Aaron Moran. Oh, yes. Eddie Alberts. And it was like, once again, I don't know, radiation affected them or something.

But instead of killing women, they were fucking them. Seems like a better idea to me. Okay. In Seminoid, which is another, as Gilbert would say, Guinea production.

Ah! I don't you start now. Okay. Back it off. Okay, let's skip to the next one. Not, okay. Yeah, let's jump around in the interest of time. Let's jump.

Pick your favorite. I will. Okay. This woman has cut, chopped, broken, and burned five men beyond recognition. But no jury in America would convict her. Ooh. Oh, I don't think I have that one. I spit on your grave.

Yes. Oh, my God. Yes, that was one of those revenge ones. The rape and revenge. Let's not forget the first part. And tell him what was notable about the star of that picture. Camille Keaton. Does the last name ring a bell?

She was the granddaughter of Buster Keaton. Yes. Oh, my God. I didn't know that. It's insane trivia. Yeah. The star of spit on your, I spit on your grave, was Buster Keaton's grand daughter. So she continued the great art of cinema.

Yeah. Is there a Sherlock Jr. homage? We'll go back and examine now with that in mind. And when they're raping her, she's wearing the Buster Keaton hat. Oh, cut that out. And she's very, it's very chilling because she doesn't have any expression. It's like, oh, there's the story. Very good.

And that was, I just thought that that was a film, if you recall, Gil, but that played in Times Square, like into the early 90s almost. Oh, yes, yes. I remember the poster. And at one point, Ciskel and Ebert were so outraged by it that they devoted an entire half-hour episode. Like, what's going on? I love it. I was like 13 or something at the time.

I was like, thanks for the half-hour commercial. Okay. There's only one thing wrong with the Davis baby. Oh, it's alive. You got it. Okay. I wish I watched over Halloween. Boy, Larry Cohen, somebody we've got to reach out to.

Yes, he's a terrific guest. I've seen him talk about it. We'll get him soon. That's got a lot of A-list talent, Bernard Herman. Yeah. And Rick Baker. Making the little monster baby with the fangs, yes. Yeah.

Okay. To avoid fainting, just keep repeating. it's only a movie oh what they oh oh god god god not mando connie it came around that time uh 1972 that helps you oh fuck oh i remember this tagline it's not bednobs and broomstice west craven's first film as a director wow based on bergmans i love this bergman first on bergman first on bergman's the urgent spring last last house on the left that's right yes very good yeah i've always said frank i don't know if if that can ever be proven because anybody who saw last house on the left never saw

the bergman movie and vice versa they'd make a great double bill yeah well we all just kind of take that on faith so well there's a lot of that there's like the talk about how star wars was loosely based on kursawa here the hidden fortress yeah or hidden fortress yeah okay uh i warned you not to go out tonight. Ooh. I'll give you a hint, Gil. Yes. Yes, Senator, we had a lot of buffers.

Oh, my God. Oh, wait a minute. Would this be maniac? Maniac, yes. Yes. With Joe Spinell. The late great Joe Spinell. Yeah.

Actually protested by, do you remember the women against pornography? They were a group that would hang out around Times Square in protest. Oh, yes, yes, sure. And then, like, the studio, the producers would, like, call them and say, can you believe this movie Maniac is playing? And they would go and set up picket lines. I was, you know, 12 years old and I snuck it. Cleverly done.

Okay, the mutilator. Well, just, I'm going to play a little bit of the mutilator theme song. Because, uh, of course you are. Interesting points about this film. It's in the advertising, it says repeatedly, written, produced, and directed by Buddy Cooper. Like, this would be like a selling, like, this is, Martin says he's a beautiful thing, belly Wilder.

Yeah, oh, it's another Buddy Cooper picture. He never made a movie before, and he hasn't been one since. It originally had the completely brain damaged, dead title of Fall Break. Oh, geez. So here is... Sounds like a teen sex comedy. Yeah, but Fall Break also isn't a real thing. But here, let me play you the Fall Break theme song that appears in the movie.

Sitting on the shore, tourists all left about a month before, and we're going to have a good time. Gonna have a good time. Yeah, we're going on now. I'm all breaking, walking at an end in the moonlight. So that's the theme to the mutilator. Yeah. It gets you in a really scary move. Yeah.

I also think that's the worst fake 50s music since. The Lord Godbush. That's why I want Gilbert That's all. Hey, hey, what do you say? Looks like it's going to be a very fine day. My girl is with me today. Looks like some real fine things are coming my way.

Hey, hey, what do you say? Looks like it's going to be a very fine day. Just hanging out with nothing to do. Lucky, lucky me that I bumped into you looking so good and looking so fine. I wonder, wonder, should I make you mine? Bow, bow, bow, bow, bow, okay. You know, I think the lords of Flatbush would have benefited from a couple of axe murders. You know, Mikey, why don't you do one more and then we'll stop here and we'll do,

We'll do another one. Okay, terrific. In the interest of time, we'll do two minis out of this because it's such a fun idea. You've got so much here, we don't want to cut you short. Okay, let's jump ahead to sometimes Dead is Better. Oh, that was the pit cemetery. Nice. Do you remember who said the line in the movie?

Fred Gwynn. That's right. Herman Munster himself. That's right. Do you remember around the same time he was also in Fatal Attraction? I think he was a judge or a lawyer? Oh, no, he was in. my, my, my, my, my, my.

My cousin Vinny. Cousin, he was a judge at, yeah. But, uh, and that was when you'd be in the theater. You just hear everybody at the theater go, that's Herman Munster. Hey, that's, oh, yes. Poor guy was a renaissance, man. He was an artist. He was a, he was a very, he was a, shake, did Shakespeare.

I mean, he couldn't, he couldn't, he couldn't escape the shadow of, uh, no, of Herman Munster. And, and, and he did, he did that line in New England way. Yeah. Sometimes death is better. That's right. And Tom remembers. There's a rat in the department. Why don't we stop it here and we'll do a second one of these, Mike,

because it's so much fun and Gilbert's having a blast. And plus it's an invitation for him to sing. Terrific. And maybe when you come back, I'll learn your name. Hey, hey, there's something to look forward to in the second episode. I've spoken to him like 500 times you'd think I would have known his name. It took your 17 episodes to get mine, so he's going to have to wait his turn. I was going to say, you speak to Frank Santo Babouba, you know, three times a week.

I read, I was out at a show at a, a place called City Winery. I was seeing a Tina Fey thing. And someone recognized my voice from the podcast. And he said, are you Frank Santo Padre? Which he thinks is my name. So we'll have this man back very, very soon. So what do you think? Well, I'm Gilbert Gottfried,

and this has been Gilbert and Frank's amazing colossal obsessions with my co-host, Frank Santopadre, once again, recording at Nutmeg with our engineer, Frank Berterosa. And let me see if I've got his name right now. Mike McPadden You got it Oh God You know what

You know what Don't come back on this show Because I want to end on a victory Mike thanks We'll do it again Soon Colossal Obsessions