Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - GGACP Classic: Peter Marshall

Episode Date: March 28, 2024

GGACP celebrates the birthday of actor, singer and former “Hollywood Squares” host Peter Marshall (b. March 28) with this CLASSIC presentation of an interview from 2016! In this episode, Peter regales Gilbert and Frank with irresistible stories about Redd Foxx, the mob, Glenn Ford, Uncle Miltie’s “apparatus” and Charlie Weaver’s (and Vincent Price’s!) sexual proclivities. Also, Peter croons with Bing, tours with Bob Hope, gets roasted by Orson Welles and runs afoul of John Wayne. PLUS: Al Jolson schmoozes! Phil Silvers does “Who’s on First”! Gilbert ticks off Marlon Brando! Peter and Nanette Fabray hit a nudie bar! And the definitive version of the Paul Lynde/Golddiggers story! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TV comics, movie stars, hit singles and some toys Trivia and dirty jokes, an evening with the boys Once is never good enough for something so fantastic So here's another Gilbert and Franks. Colossal podcast. I'm here with my co-host, Frank Santopadre, and we're once again at Nutmeg Post with our engineer, Frank Furtarosa. Our guest this week is a singer, comedian, writer, and actor, and Emmy-winning game show host who's been working in the business for an impressive seven decades. He starred on the Broadway stage and in movies and appeared on dozens of TV shows,

including The Ed Sullivan Show, Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In, 77 Sunset Strip, Love American Style, The Love Boat, Lou Grant, WKRP in Cincinnati, In Living Color, Mad TV, and Sabrina the Teenage Witch, to name a few. In his long career, he's worked with everyone from Bob Hope to Dean Martin to Buddy Hackett to Lucille Ball to Groucho Marx to Vincent Price. For nearly two decades, he hosted one of the most popular and highly rated game shows in television history, Hollywood Squares, for which he took home five Emmys. But perhaps most importantly, he once guest starred on a show we've been obsessing about on this podcast, Lanigan's Rabbi. Please welcome the versatile and multi-talented Peter Marshall.

Well, thank you, guys. Thank you very much. I should have a bigger house after all that stuff. I didn't do that. I did well, didn't I? Oh, it's an impressive resume, Peter Marshall. Now, we met once. We did something.

There was a bunch of – it was Gene Rayburn and I think Bob Eubanks and Wink Martindale and a bunch of us. You were doing some kind of a show, and we went over and did something with you. And it's – I wonder if that was up all night. It could very well be. It's quite a long time ago. And, you know, I'm 90 years old, so what do you want from me? I have trouble with yesterday.

Yeah, happy birthday. We saw pictures of your birthday on Facebook. It was really lovely. At the Paley Center here, they had a little do for me, and about 260 lovely friends showed up. They showed film of me from 1940, what was it, 1949. I had a show on ABC called, what the heck was it called? Anyway, it was the first show ever filmed back, they sent back to New York, and I had never seen it.

And we did 11 of them, and we had the Neil Hefty Orchestra, did 11 of them and we had the Neil Hefty orchestra big orchestra Neil Hefty wow yeah and it starred Tommy Noonan and Pete Marshall and we were working a little place here called the band box and we were getting 250 a week and they asked us to do this show and we were the stars and we got 45 a week now this is 49 but I thought they were all gone they found three of the shows at the Television Academy. They showed that, and then I had never seen, I had done Gordon Jenkins' Manhattan Tower in 1954, which was an hour and a half live, and I had never seen that, and there it was. Stuff I had done, me singing with Dinah, me singing with Dionne Warwick,

me singing with all these different people, Bob, you know, it was just an amazing evening. This guy knocked himself, his name is Jimmy Pearson. He does all my stuff for PBS. I don't know if you watch my big band stuff on PBS, but he puts all that stuff together and he's just an amazing guy. So it was a thrill for me. And a lot of people showed up and a lot of dear, dear friends. And it was, it was a lovely birthday. Who were some of the people who showed up? Let me see. We had Bobby Morris and we had Barbara Eden and we had Lonnie Anderson and we had – Joanne Worley was there.

I saw her on Facebook. Joanne Worley and Artie Johnson. Yeah. Yeah. Alex Trebek and just people I've worked with and I've known all my life. And Neil Hefty. He was my roommate at one time at the old Forrest Hotel. Odd couple theme.

And Batman. Yeah, yeah. Then we were living at the Forrest Hotel, and he was playing trumpet with Muggsy Spander, I think, at the old Arcadia Ballroom. And I was a page at the time. At 14, I was an usher at the Paramount Theater. Androom. And I was a page at the time. I had been at 14. I was an usher at the Paramount Theater. And at 15, I was a page boy at NBC. I was the youngest page.

It's a long story. I won't bore you how a little nepotism got me the job. But I was living with Neil. He would write arrangements for the Jerry Wall Band or Sonny Dunham for $10. And I was dating Blossom Deary. You ever hear of Blossom Deary? Yeah, sure. A great piano singer.

She was a cabaret performer. We were all kids together. And so when I got this TV thing, they were looking for a band. I said, I got the guy. And that was Neil's first big band thing he ever did. That was 1949, yeah. He's come up on this show. I'm sorry?

I said his name has come up on this show. We mentioned him. We talked about Neil Hefti. He also did the music for How to Murder Your Wife with Jack Lemmon. And The Odd Couple. Yeah. They did a lot of TV. And also Batman.

Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum. Sure, sure, sure. He said he made more money from that than anything he ever did. he ever did. And now I became a regular on Hollywood Squares, but this was later on with Whoopi Goldberg and Henry Winkler. Right. And now we had fun on Hollywood Squares, but I heard that your period of Hollywood Squares, there was like kind of fun in a bottle.

Oh, we had. wait, you must remember, it was very familial. Charlie Weaver, Cliff Arquette, I've known since I'm 18. Wally Cox, I went to PS165 at 109th Street. He was a year ahead of me. I've known Roseberry all my life. Vinnie Price, I've known since I'm 18. I mean, so we were all kind of family.

And it was fun. And I was imbibing a tad in those days. I haven't had a drink in about 45 years. But I wouldn't drink on the show. But we would do three shows. And we'd have a big sumptuous dinner. And there was wine. And Paul Lynde and whomever.

And so the Thursdays and Friday shows were quite wonderful. You know, we never rehearsed. I just would walk in. Who's on the show? And it was amazing. There would be Ginger Rogers or Gloria Swanson or, you know, Walter Matthau. I would be so excited. And we would just wing the whole thing.

It was a very loving bunch of people, the production staff. And we were on for 16 years, and it was a love fest. It was really a lot of fun. Why were the Thursday and Friday shows in particular the looser? Well, there was wine at dinner. That's why. So by the Thursday and Fridayiday show they were blasted that well uh some of us were that not me no i never drank on the show yeah i had too many words so uh no i was a good

boy on the show but i would i would see some people just you were talking about glenn ford a little earlier yeah thursday and fr, we'd have to carry him in. They'd put him on his chair and they'd go from there. But, you know, he loved doing the show. He was a very sweet man. But he had somebody with him at all times

to drive him here to there and back. It was amazing. You know, I walked in one night and George Saunders was on the show. Wow. I said, George Saunders was on the show. Wow. I said, George Saunders was on the show.

I was so excited. Anyway, it was a wonderful experience for me because it took me four and a half hours a week to do the show. So I got to work Vegas, or we'd get 10 weeks ahead, and I would go out and do the Music Man or, you know, Guys and Dolls or whatever. So it was a blessed job. And they paid me wonderfully, I must say. Now, I heard Paul Lynn, when he got blasted, he was more than a handful. He could be grumpy. There's some good stories in your book about him, Peter.

Oh, yeah. You know, the the book they said why don't you do a your life story i said my life story nobody remembers the people i i you know like neil hefty nobody remembers neil i said nobody will remember anybody and you know you talk about jolson who got me my first job no but the kids don't remember al jolson al jolson got you your first job he did he got He got me my – I was 14. My sister was in a show called Hold On to Your Hats. My sister was the actress Joanne Drew.

Joanne Drew from Red River and All the King's Men. Red River and All the King's Men, yeah. And she wore a yellow ribbon. Sure. And her name was Joanna Letitia Lecoq. I'm Ralph Pierre Lecoq. I think our parents wanted us to know how to get along with people, Ralph Pierre Lecoq. I think our parents wanted us to know how to get along

with people, so they gave us these names to show us that life was not easy. So that was a difficult upbringing with those names. But she went to New York. Our dad had died when she was 14 and I was 10. We were from West Virginia. Mom took her to New York and she became...

John Robert Powers, the model guy, he gave her the name Joanne Marshall. And so when I got my first, I was Pete Marshall. I wanted to use my mother's maiden name. But they laughed. They said, well, that would be simple. I would have been Peter Frampton. Wow.

That's funny. Isn't that strange? But anyway, he was in love with my sister. And we were living on 93rd Street, West End Avenue. He would come up there. My mother couldn't stand him. My sister was probably 18 to 19 at the time, and there was this old guy. So he had schmoozed mother, and I was sitting there one day, and I was an usher at the old Riviera Theater. I don't know if it's still there, 96th Street and Broadway. And he said, hey, Katie, what do you want to do? I said, I want to be an usher at the Paramount Theater.

He said, no kidding. He said, give me the phone. He dials it. Hello, give me Bobby Whiteman. Bobby's not here. Give me Bobby Shapiro. Hello, Bobby. Joel here.

Yeah, I got a favor. Yeah, you got it. Yeah, yeah. Start Friday. And that's how I got my first job around the business. I was 14. I was 6'3 and weighed about 104 pounds and uh I was there for almost oh gosh uh until I got the gig at the NBC until I got the

page board job yeah and what oh go ahead one question I'm supposed to ask you that I told a couple of times on this show but I I think you were there. Might have been. And that's when you and Paul Lynn went into the Gold Diggers. They were those famous sexy girl dancers. From the D. Martin show. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, well, go ahead.

Okay, no. The story's been told on the show several times. Okay. But we were told that you – Yeah. We were told you had the definitive version. Actually, I was not there. Wally Cox was there. Wally tells the story.

Because the way I heard it was that Paul Lynn was brought into the Gold Diggers dressing room. That was these sexy girls that would dance in the Dean Martin show. And Paul Lynn looked around disgustedly and said, this place smells like cunt. No, he didn't say that. He said pussy. You've been corrected. He says this place smells like pussy, and then there was a pause, and then he said, I think.

What made me laugh was the I think. Now the truth can be told. The truth can be told, yeah. That's great. We finally got it cleared up. It's an educational program. You can say anything you want here, Peter. That's great. We finally got it cleared up. It's an educational program. You can say anything you want here, Peter. It's just on the Internet.

I can see that. But tell us about Jolson. You were starting to tell us about Jolson. He got me that job. Actually, Joni was in love with a bass player. I think his name was Artie Bernstein with the Benny Goodman Band. But can you imagine? Can you remember?

When I went to New York, it was 1938. There was bands everywhere. I mean, you know, at the New York, there was Glenn Miller, Astor Ruvabee, the Harry James. You got the Strand, the Capitol, Louis State. Then they had the Roseland Ballroom. You got, I mean, and music. It was Rogers in the Heart. It was Gershwin.

It was cool. The first show I ever saw, I told this at my birthday party, was a thing called Leave It to Me with Gaxson and Moore. Now, nobody remembers William Gaxson and Victor Moore, but Victor Moore was really a great comedy actor. And there was a little girl in the show who did a striptease. Now, I'm 12 years old. And she went down to Brawn Patties, and Cole Porter wrote this song

called My Heart Belongs to Daddy that was Mary was Mary Martin. That was my first show. Then I saw Buddy Epson and his sister in a show. And then I saw, my sister took me to the Roxy Theater when I was 12. And I had no idea, but it was the most glorious theater I think I'd ever seen. And 12 years later, I'm headlining it. Can you believe that? Little did I know. But New York was just the most wonderful place because, first of all, it was run by the mob. And so it was clean. Nobody bothered you.

It was safe. Your sister, Joanne Drew, married the singer, Dick Ames. And that helped you get a leg up in the business. Do I have that right? Well, yeah, I always wanted to be a singer, and he was, I had lost, as I mentioned, I had lost my dad, so he was sort of my big brother or father figure, and he was just the greatest singer you

ever heard in your life. And they met at the Paramount when she was one of the Copa dancers, and he was singing with the Harry James Band. I think he was making $50 a week, and Joni was making $75. And he's about eight months after they got married, he teamed up with a guy by the name of Billy Burton, a manager. And within about three months, he was making $25,000 a week.

I mean, he had hit record after hit record. Nobody realized that he was bigger than Frank Sinatra at one time. He was the highest-paid American for two years in a row. Dick Ames. Yeah. And who were some of the big gangsters back then? Well, I worked for Frank Costello at the Old Martinique in 1950. And I worked in Chicago.

I worked for Denji and Donjo at the Chez Paris. And I worked for the Fatita Brothers down in Galveston. And every town had this. Fatita Brothers. in Galveston, and every town had this. Fatita Brothers. And I've heard that from every performer says they loved working with the mob. Well, Moe Dalitz was like a surrogate father, and Monty Prozer, who opened it, it was Monty Prozer's Copacabana. It wasn't Jack and Trotter's.

When Monty had it, Jack and Trotter was the doorman, okay? Copacabana. It wasn't Jack and Trotters. When Monty had it, Jack and Trotter was the doorman, okay? And Monty Proser, I met when I was 14 because my sister was a dancer, one of the Copa darlings. And I worked for Moe Dalitz. Noonan and Marshall, we opened the Desert Inn in 1950, and Moe was so wonderful to me. And I knew him into his 90s. And he was, in fact, they said, one of these days they're going to ask you a favor. I said, really? Do you think so? I got this call. This is what I'm doing well.

And it's from Mo. He said, hey, I got a favor to ask. Oh, my God. What's he going to ask? He said, would you host the Joe DiMaggio golf tournament? That was the favor he asked. Not so bad. Not so bad. Frank and I were talking about years ago, like there was Rowan and Martin's laughing. Right. And I hear you and their straight man, Dan Rowan, you didn't have a high opinion of him. Well, it's not that I didn't have a high opinion. It's not. Let me give you, I'll tell you the

story. Dan was selling used cars and Dick was a bartender. They did not know each other. They were not friends and they both wanted to be in show business. They were both very close to Tommy Noonan. Tommy, you know, he passed at 48. He was just a brilliant comic. Your ex, we should tell our listeners, your ex, your ex-partner, your ex-comedy partner. We were new to the Marshall. New to the Marshall. We were really the hot guys. In 1950 at the Martinique, we took over New York.

We were really, especially on the West Coast, we were huge. But anyway, he had these two friends. I knew Dick. I didn't know Dan. And he said, let's put them together for an act. I said, why ruin their life? He said, well, they want to be in show business. So we wrote their act. We got them an agent. Joe Rollo was a guy who was a very big agent out here in California. We even got them

their first job. We were working a joint in Palm Springs called the Chi Chi. And Erwin Schumann owned it. And we booked ourselves in and then canceled. And we called Erwin and said, we've got an act for you. And that's how they started. And over the years, they did wonderfully well. And when Tommy was dying, he was at the motion picture home. He was out there for eight months.

I said to Dan and Dick, I said, go out and visit Tommy. You know, tell him how to talk about his life. It's going to be okay. And be encouraging. Dick would go out all the time and send money and things. Dan never once went out. And that's, I was, so he was off my list. I just thought he was terrible for that.

And Dan was not the nicest guy in the world. Anyway, he alienated everybody. He would have alienated St. Francis, you know, and the Pope, you know, I, gosh, anyway, uh, I, no, I didn't like him. And, uh, and his children, uh, his, his son is a very big lawyer out here and, uh, uh, they don't speak to me, of course. And I don't blame them because I've said nasty things about their father. But I think I'm in the right to do it.

And then Frank was telling me that when – originally, it was Dan Rowan that got all the – You mean for Hollywood Squares? Yeah. I was doing a show in New York called Skyscraper. It was the only musical Julie Harris ever did. I was her leading man and Charles Nelson Reilly. And the music was written by Sammy Conn and Jimmy Van Heusen. Some wonderful songs.

I'll only miss her when I think of her. Great song. And it ran about a year. And it closed. They usually give you two weeks to notice. But another show called Bonjour was coming in. So it's amazing how timing is so important. I got back to California a week earlier than I should have. And the day after I got home,

I got a call from Bob Quigley. And he said, we're doing a game show and we'd like to talk to you. In those days, I was doing the Kellogg's commercials and they were kind of cute. I had like 30 of them running. And his wife remembered me from Noonan and's commercials and they were kind of cute. I had like 30 of them running and his wife remembered me from Newton and Marshall and they were looking for this straight. So I walked in and I saw this pilot they had done a year earlier at CBS with Burt Parks. In fact, I said, he's awfully good. Why aren't you using him? And they said, we're looking for a complete non-entity. I said, oh really? I'd been in the business 25 years. for a complete non-entity. I said, oh, really?

I'd been in the business 25 years. So they didn't have it. You know, California has no idea what New York is doing. Do you realize that? Yeah, sure. Anyway, I was going to go back and do breakfast at Tiffany's. Abe Burroughs asked me what I like to do. Oh, with Mary Tyler Moore.

Yeah. Right. And so they offered me this game show. Well, they talked to me about it. And I said to my agent, I said, I want to go back to New York. I was in love with the dancer. And I said, I want to go. Yeah, I grew up in New York.

I went, yeah. Anyway, I wanted to go back. And so I go back to New York, and they called me. My agent, they said, they want you to do this show called Hollywood Squares for 13 weeks. I said, tell them I'm not really interested. And they said, well, okay, but if you won't do it, Dan Ruhn's going to do it. I said, really? I said, to screw Dan Ruhn, I did the 13 weeks. Amazing.

And I was going to still go back because I didn't think the show would last past 13 weeks. And they picked this up. And then Abe Burroughs called me and said, they want to go blonde on the show. I said, what do you mean? He said, they want Richard Chamberlain. Well, they never even opened in New York. They did previews, but they never opened the show. So you never know.

You'd take a left, you'd take a right, you'd take a shot. And who knows what's going to happen? I don't know. Well, had Dan Rowan become the host of Hollywood Squares, perhaps Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In never comes to be. Well, I'll tell you what kind of a guy he was. It was before Laugh-In. Dick never knew this, by the way. I said to Dick, I said, Dick, did you ever know that Dan was up for Hollywood Squares?

He said, no. I said, well, there you go. Never told him. Never told him. Yeah. Yeah. And the Breakfast at Tiffany's turned out to be, as you said, also a non-starter. Yeah, they closed in previews. Yeah, they closed the previews.

Yeah, they closed the previews, I think. And so the biggest show of your career is because you wanted to screw over Dan Roach. That's about right. That's good stuff. That's why I got the big house here. That's paid for. Was there a second pilot, Peter, of Hollywood Squares with Sandy Barron? Sandy did a pilot.

I don't know if he did a pilot. Sandy was a friend of mine, by the way. Yeah, funny guy. Yeah, he was a cute guy. I think he did a run-through. I think he did some run-throughs. I don't know if they shot. They may have shot a pilot.

I don't know. But I don't think so. The only pilot I ever saw was Bert Parks. Yeah. but I don't think so. The only pilot I ever saw was Bert Parks. Yeah. And now, Rosanna Arquette and David Arquette, their

grandfather was Cliff Arquette. Cliff Arquette, who was known on Hollywood Squares as Charlie Weaver. He was known throughout his career as Charlie Weaver. I met him when I was 18. There was a radio show called The Auto Light Show,

and he would play Dick Hames' mother. And he would do the radio show in drag. And he was maybe one of the cutest devils you ever met. I don't know if I put it in the book. I may have. He was single for many, many years. And there used to be – what do they call it? A key club?

Oh, yeah. It's in the book that he would go to key parties. I did put it in the book. That he was a swinger. Yeah. They would go to all these different housewives. They would all get together. go to all these different housewives.

They would all get together. And the husband, he would hire a hooker and take her to this thing. And so it was supposed to be his wife. It was the wives of these guys. So they would throw the key in the pot. And then he said, I screwed about every cute girl in Redondo Beach or wherever the heck it was. But he would take a hooker as his wife. That's a page out of Joey Ross.

He was the cutest guy you ever wanted to meet. And he was a very funny man. I met all the Arquette kids. They did a thing over at the Wilshire Hotel. They asked me to host it for Cliff. And I did it. And I met Patricia and David and Roseanne, who gave me the sweetest hug.

She was just, I'm telling you, I don't know her. I don't know any of the archers, but that's a sweet girl. You can tell. Yeah. And it's so funny because Charlie Weaver, that character of Charlie Weaver, was like this sweet little bumpkin. Oh, absolutely.

He was a devil baby of the world, let me tell you. You know, he was a Civil War buff, and he had this, I don't know what it was, back someplace in the east in Pennsylvania that had all these memorabilia. And he would spend a lot of time back there. He was really into that. Yeah. He was just a lovely man. There's a piece in your book, Peter, about him leaving the radio show in drag and then hanging out on Hollywood Boulevard. Yeah.

Well, you got to remember, in the old radio, you'd have to do the show twice. radio, you'd have to do the show twice. If it were 8 o'clock in New York, that meant you did it at 5 o'clock here for 8 o'clock in New York. And then you'd have to repeat it at 8 o'clock in California. So you did the show twice. They didn't record those days. And so he had like three hours. And he used to drink.

And he would go out in front of CBS in drag and try to pick up sailors, just being facetious, you know. And they would get these reports about this old lady, and the cops would say, it's Cliff, it's Cliff, leave him alone. But he was a cute guy, let me tell you. Tell us a little bit about Wally Cox, who you also knew as a kid. I loved Wally Cox. Do you know how he got into show business? Well, that's in your book, so that's how I know it. But tell our listeners.

Well, his best friend, they grew up together, was Marlon Brando. And the funny thing is, between the two of them, Marlon was a pipsqueak. Wally was a, he was built like a middleweight fighter, by the way. And he had a motorcycle. And he'd say, hey, Marlon, let's go look at the flowers. You know, it'd be that springtime. Marlon would go, I don't know, he got to get up. So he ran the show, believe it or not.

And I first met them in New York when when i was working with tommy uh probably about 19 yeah 1950 i guess and uh they were rooming together and marlin and uh i were sort of dating the same girl uh shirley ballard and so they would come up to the apartment that's when i first uh met marlin but i knew my new i knew wally throughout, he was never, wanted to be in show business. He was a jeweler, really. He could build, he could do anything. He was just so clever, and he made jewelry. And how they became, they were in military school together,

and they grew up together in Omaha. And then, as I said, I knew him at PS165 when he was probably about 14, or 13, maybe, anyway. He would tell these stories from the war. And this one story was about Dufault. He said, I got this guy Dufault. And he did this whole thing on Dufault. And he told these stories.

And they said, why don't you go to the Village Vanguard and do a show? Well, they went down to the village for one night. And in the audience was Irving, what was his name, Greenbaum and I can't think of the other guy. They were developing a show called Mr. Peepers. Oh, Greenbaum and Fritzl. Fritzl. Yeah. Fritzl. Yeah.

Greenbaum and Fritzl. Jim Fritzl. And they were there that night. And they had been looking for Mr. Peepers. Right. And out he came. They said, that's the guy. And been looking for Mr. Peepers. Right. And out he came. They said, that's the guy. And that was his first job in the business.

And that's how he got into show business. Incredible. And it's funny because there again, Wally Cox on camera always looked like the ultimate nebbish. Oh, he was. Talk about a ladies' man. He was really a ladies' man. And I he was, and he, talk about a ladies man. He was really a ladies man. And he, I tell you, yeah, but, and he was so sweet and he was so extremely bright. He knew nothing about show business. Everything about show business, you'd always say Gregory Peck. That was Gregory Peck.

So one night we gave him a, and so everybody knew when he said Gregory Peck, it was wrong. So one night we gave him where the answer was Gregory Peck. And he said it was Gregory Peck. The concession said, no, that's not right. And it was. It cost the guy like $800 or something. He, of course, was the voice of underdog. Sure.

Mr. Peeper's an underdog. There's something in your book, too, Peter, about how when they were together, that Marlon would come over to play with Wally and Wally wasn't so into playing with Marlon that he would, that's what you put in the book, that he would pretend he wasn't home. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. I, you know, I wrote the book, what, 10 years ago, so I would have to, you know, look at my notes and things like that. But incidentally, it's a pretty good book. It sold out immediately. I'm going to take a moment to plug it. It's called Backstage with the Original Hollywood Square.

You can't really find it. I guess you can find it on Amazon. You found it on Amazon. I got it on Amazon, but we're going to plug the Kindle version. Yeah, the Kindle. I get checks every few months from Kindle. It's a fun read full of stories and great pictures. Aren't they wonderful pictures? It got reviews like the most definitive game show book ever written.

It got wonderful reviews. I wrote it with Adrian Armstrong, whose husband was Bill Armstrong, who was one of the original producers of Squares, who wrote all the great jokes. And unfortunately, he drank a little too much and he passed early. But I miss him terribly. We became very close. And one person you talk about that his name has popped up before on the podcast, all with the same explanation.

Hysterically funny on stage, but everyone hated him in person. Who's that? And that's Jackie Mason. Yeah. You know. him in person. Who's that? And that's Jackie Mason. Yeah. I don't really know Jackie Mason, but we did almost 6,000 shows in 16 years. And I think I asked the guys, please, don't invite him back. I think I did that twice out of all the hundreds of stars we ever had.

I tell you why. He was very good on the show, by the way, but he brought the panel down. You know, one guy could bring the panel. You had nine stars, and if you talk over questions and if you interrupt people, it just disrupts the whole show. And that's unfortunately what happened with jack and he you know you ever see him on broadway he's phenomenal oh terrific very funny man very funny man but for some reason he just didn't work on squares so paul wasn't on the show for the first year uh and then he he was in different cubicles and then he became the star of the show.

He got much more mail than I did. He got love letters and things. And I was pretty cute in those days. But Paul got all the stuff, yeah. Now, I remember watching Hollywood Squares and seeing Groucho Marx. He was on the show. I came in one night, and there was Groucho Marx. He was on the show. I came in one night and there was Groucho Marx. And he did that work for him. I tell you how the show works.

And Henny Young, I finally got Henny on the show. And we were shooting in Vegas. You know, I did the last year of Squares in Riviera. And Goebel was my closest friend on the show. I've known George. We were in Vaudeville. We go back so many years when nobody knew who he was or who I was. And we loved each other.

He was my neighbor. He lived around the corner. It took me two years to get him on the show. I finally got him on the show. And of course, he never left. And so we roomed together on the bottom floor of the Riviera. And Henny had bad legs. I said, stay with us.

Dress with us. because you do five shows and I think he actually I think he was there for maybe 10 shows whatever and he came in he said how's your show work I said here's how the show works I'll ask you a question uh if you don't have a joke just go to the or if you have a joke just like joke, how many men on a hockey team? About half, you know, whatever the joke is. And just, it's ba-dop, ba-dop. He said, I got it. So I said, in 1928, whatever the question was, four guys, he said, these two guys went duck hunting, and they came to us and said, duck here. They went home.

Yeah, I mean, you know. And then I said, and I repeated it. I said, 1920. And he went to another joke. Well, George fell off his chair. I couldn't get him to answer the question. And I finally had to stop tape, which was very rare, because he would have done a half hour, you know. But he's one of those guys that, man, he made me laugh.

Henny Youngman, you know. Funny guy. I was so lucky. I got to work with Harry Ritz, the funniest man I think I ever saw. Harry Ritz. Everybody copied Harry Ritz. Yeah, you say in the book that Jerry Lewis copied a lot from Harry Ritz. Everybody copied Harry Ritz.

He was the funniest man around. But I got to work with Joe Frisco. You probably never heard of Joe Frisco. He was just one of the great comics. Anyway, my life has been, you know, I've worked with Durante. I've worked with Sinatra. I've gotten to work with everybody that I know and I love. I worked with Jack Benny.

We did a show in 1950 together. I toured with Bob Hope. I've had this blessed life. And it's been, I got to sing with Bing Crosby. They showed all this stuff the other night of me singing with Dinah Shore, with Dionne Warwick, Crosby. They found all this wonderful little tape.

I've been in show business 75 years, 90 years. Wow. Not bad for a kid from West Virginia. Not bad for a kid. A poor kid from West Virginia. A poor kid from West Virginia. You got it, yeah. But did Groucho work out on Hollywood Squares?

Did his comedy? No, it didn't work for him at all. And after the show, I was so excited. I said, Mr. Marks, I can't tell you what a pleasure it was. I said, I hope we work together. I hope you enjoyed yourself, and I hope you come back. He said, kid, the next time we'll ever get together, we'll have to be socially. He didn't enjoy himself. He did not enjoy himself. But at least he sat there for five shows. A lot of guys didn't work on the show.

Great comics. You know, Hackett was good on the show, but Hackett was better than the show. You know, Shecky, who is like, you know, family to me. You know, we were kids together. He's from Chicago. His first job was I was at the Chase Hotel in St. Louis with headlining, and there was a little room called Zodiac Room. As for Tom Amenem,

he did three one-hour shows a night, for like $2.50 a week. And that's when I fell in love with that crazy person. But he didn't really work as well. But I think after a while, Shecky would have worked on the show, but he was not happy. But it's the show where you get a question, and you got to, that's why Paul, you know,

why do motorcyclists wear leather? Because chiffon wrinkles. I mean, that's the show. It's got to be bop-a-dop-a-dop. Go back to your friend George Goebel for a second, because there's good stuff about him in the book. And I didn't know this. There actually was a spooky old Alice.

Oh, she was uh i was out doing uh after squares i did another show called fantasy with lizzie elgams then i went back to broadway i did la caja fall for three years i did the national company then i did the palace for a year and then i did the neil sam as rumors and i'm at i'm uh where am i i'm kansas state and uh it was a one-nighter. And we're there, and it's sold out. And I get a call from Alice that George had passed. And they wanted me to be what they ever called the lead whatever.

And I said, you know something? I cannot do this to the promoter. I cannot walk out of a full house. I said, and the one guy that would know that is George because he wouldn't have done it either. And so I never even got to go to his funeral. But I loved him. He was like, oh, what a wonderful man. He was so funny. He was just so original. Noonan and Marshall, we were regulars on his variety show. He was a funny man, George Bilbo. There's that wonderful clip of him on the

Carson show. You know the clip I'm talking about? With Dino and Bob Hope. When they put out the cigarette and the drink. Yeah, and he says, he makes the joke about the socks. Really funny man. And he was original, by the way. He didn't copy anybody. And nobody was like him

before or after. While we wait for Gilbert to find the men's room, we promise we'll come back to the show after a word from our sponsor. Don't go away. And now back to the show. Did you say you interviewed Dick Van Dyke? We did. We had him a couple of weeks ago.

Wasn't he cute? Great. I mean, we're the same age. He's a little, I think he turned 90 about two months before. He also has a young wife. I have a young, beautiful wife. I met 30 years ago when I was 60 and she was 25. That's embarrassing.

I've always hated old guys with young girls, and here I am. Good work if you can get it, buddy. But I think Dick, when his last wife passed, I think he kept saying, you know, Pete may have a good idea here. And he married this lovely girl who I don't really know her, but I've met her. Arlene. And we have so many similarities, and yet we're not close friends or anything. We know each other. But during the war, I was in Italy during the war, and I was a disc jockey.

And during the war, he was a disc jockey. And after the war, I was in Italy during the war and I was a disc jockey and during the war, he was a disc jockey. And after the war, I was with Noonan and Marshall after the war, he did an act with three guys. And, and then he did bye-bye birdie in New York with Chita Rivera. And I did bye-bye birdie in London with Chita Rivera.

And then he got a hit TV series. I had a hit TV series. They did all these wonderful big movies. I did all these terrible movies. But I'm doing the Frank Sinatra one year, and we used to do an after show, a bunch of us. And Frankie Randall, who passed this past year, broke my heart. He was my closest friend, and he was playing the piano. And I said, you know, there's a guy in the audience.

We're similar. We're not that close, but we're similar. And I'd love to put on a happy face with him. He got up. I would love to have a film of Van Dyke and myself doing put on a happy face. Oh, gosh. That'd be a gift. On the podcast, I got Dick to sing

put on a happy face with me in a duet. There you go. But as I said, I'm a huge fan. He is just so delightful and so talented. And I don't think he has a clue how good he is. I really have no idea. I don't think he does really not know how wonderful he is, but he's wonderful. And you worked with Phil Silvers. I did. Phil Silvers, to me, was the greatest straight man that ever lived. We talk about

George Burns, who was quite wonderful. And Jack Benny actually was a straight man. He was straight to all those great comics. But the greatest straight man I ever saw work... You've got to remember, that's how he started in burlesque. He was a straight man with

Rags Raglin. And if you ever saw Phil Silver's Rags Raglin, there's some film on them, by the way, doing Who's on First, long before Abbott and Costello. Who's on First is an old burlesque bit. And the first film ever done on Who's on First

is Phil and Rags. And it's out there somewhere. And it's just, you know, one night we're at the Lord Tarleton Hotel and we're working somewhere. And Tommy used to drink a lot. And I wouldn't drink too much. I never drank too much. And Phil is doing, he's on, and it's a benefit, and he's hosting it. And he's brilliant. And Tommy keeps interrupting him. And so he got Tommy up with him, and Tommy didn't say a word, and Tommy's never been funnier.

And that's when I said to myself, maybe I'm not that good, you know, because it was all Phil Silvers. What he did with Tommy was brilliant. He was great, and, you What he did with Tommy was brilliant. He was great, and he was a gambler. He had worked Vegas, and all the money he made on television, and that hike, you know, the show, the Bilko show. He blew in Vegas and Reno and wherever.

Oh, my God. But I loved him very much. You know, as I said, that was a great era, and everybody was sort of available, and I got to that was a great era. And everybody was sort of available. And I got to work with a lot of wonderful people in my life. And tell us about knowing Uncle Miltie. You've known him since you were a kid. When I was a page boy, I first met him.

His wife was in Hold India Hats with my sister and Al Jolson and Martha Ray and Jinx Falkenberg. I'm trying to think of her name. It'll come to me in a second. She divorced Milton and then married Billy Rose and then divorced Billy Rose and remarried Milton. So I've known Milton since I'm maybe 14, 15 years old. And he was always very, very kind to me. I used to do a show at the old Vanderbilt Theater. I paged the Fred Waring show.

And it was like on a Thursday night. And they would do the broadcast, and they'd do it. And then he and, I just had her name in his first name. He and his wife would pick me up and take me out to dinner. And Milton was wonderful to me all my life. I've known him all my life. And he did squares. Yeah, he did a lot, in fact.

In your book, you said he complained about his dressing room. Oh, that's one of my favorite stories. Yeah. It was like the second week of the show. And they came to me and said, Milton Berle is very unhappy. I said, why? They said, he doesn't like his dressing room and he's going to leave. What are we going to do?

I said, I'll handle it. So I go back and I said, Milton, we did five shows, so he's got five jackets hung up. I said, Milton, go home. This is a dumb game show. You're Milton Berle. There's no way you should be doing this show. Go home. Don't worry about it.

I can call Toluca Lake. I can get Joanne Worley. I can get Abby Dalton. Milton, go home. He said, what are you talking about? I said, I know you're unhappy with your dressing room. He said, I built a studio. This is a lousy dressing room.

I said, you're absolutely right. And Milton, go home. He said, I'm not going to go home. I've got these five jackets, and I've never quit a job in my life. He said, I'm doing the show. I said, okay. So I walk in. They said, what's going on?

I said, this is what I'm talking about. It's going to be okay. That was it. And now I can't let Milton Berle's name be mentioned on the show without talk about his famous apparatus. Yes. I never saw it. I won't give you some trivia about Milton. I bet you don't know.

Very few people know this. He had 11 toes. Oh, geez. Yeah. So it may have been an addendum. I have no idea. And an extra foot, apparently. So there were several physical

abnormalities. He and Forrest Tucker and a couple of other guys were very famous for their apparatus. I knew him well, but not that well. Thanks for not dodging Tucker and a couple of other guys were very famous for their apparatus. Yeah. I knew him well, but not that well. Thanks for not dodging the question, Peter. I heard Forrest Tucker once hit a golf ball. I mean, he had to get on his knees. I don't know.

That can't be. No, no. I played golf a lot with Forrest Tucker on the Calabasas. You know, I used to play, this is true, I'd play with Forrest Tucker and Mickey Rooney, two of the craziest people I ever knew in my whole life. Oh, gosh. As long as we're talking about the old days,

let's talk a little bit about Noonan and Marshall, and Gilbert was talking about your movie, The Rookie. You know, they just showed it the other day, so I got a couple of calls. We did a movie. It cost $158,000 to do this movie. Fox was dead. Fox was dying.

Cleopatra, there was a show about a guy on a boat. I can't think of that show. And it was one, I think Jerry Wald had an office over there. Anyway, they said they would do this movie. And Tommy, George O'Hanlon wrote it. Remember George O'Hanlon? He was the voice of Mr. Jetson. George Jetson.

That's right. And he was also the guy behind the eight ball, the old shorts. Remember that? You guys are too young. In movies, they would have shorts after the movie, and they had like a 10-minute little short. Were these like the Pete Smith? Yeah.

Yeah. And it was called The Man Behind the 8 Ball. Yeah. He was always falling off a roof or something. Anyway, George wrote this thing, and Tommy and he sold it to Fox. And we did this movie in about, I don't know, three weeks, whatever it was. And, uh, there was nobody there. It was just a Julie Newmar was in it. She was long before she was famous. And we did this, this dumb movie and it, it was a smash

hit. You know, they, for years they would have would have a cult in New York where they would show the movie once a year and people would come to see this movie. I just saw it recently. It was okay. The scenes I like, we played two Japanese guys in a two-man sub that capture ourselves. That was kind of fun. But this movie, the head of the studio called because we did a movie after it that was awful, that didn't do very well at all. He said, you know, your little movie kept the studio open for a year. He said, thank God for your movie because that's how the studio stayed open.

Yeah, The Rookie did very well. It was a big, big hit. With Joe Besser. Joe Besser. I love Joe Besser. You know, I can tell you stories about Joe Besser. You know that Luke Costello copied Joe Besser. Joe Besser. I love Joe Besser. You know, I can tell you stories about Joe Besser. You know that Luke Costello copied Joe Besser. Yeah, we read an interview with Cliff Nesteroff, and it was very interesting that you said that.

Or he put Cliff Besser on a contract. Yeah. He wouldn't let him work. He paid him, so he wouldn't work. Costello. Yeah. Oh, just so he could hide the fact. That Joe Besser was much funnier than Lou Costello.

Wow. Interesting. And then your second movie was Double Trouble, which was originally written for Martin and Lewis? I think so, and it wasn't very good. I didn't see it because after the movie finished, I was offered this job in London, And I said, Tommy, you know, I don't want to do the act anymore. And we had broken up once before and became Marshall and Farrell for about four years. We were signed to do Gentlemen Prefer Blondes. He opposite Marilyn Monroe and me opposite Jane Russell.

And Daryl Zanuck was in New York and saw a guy. What the heck was his name? I can't think of it. Anyway, he signed him to do the, so they paid me off and Tommy played opposite. That's, if you go see Gentleman Perfect Blondes, that's my partner, Tommy Noonan, played Gus opposite Marilyn Monroe. And he got hot after that and he really couldn't do the act. So we broke up and I teamed up with Tommy Farrell. And then I got back with Tommy when they opened the Tropicana. We went in there for almost a year at a book show because Monty Proser loved us.

And then we did the movies, and I was offered Bye Bye Birdie in London. I said, Tommy, I'd love to do this. He said, as your partner, it's going to screw me up. And as your friend, you're nuts if you don't. And we never had an argument. But that's what broke up Noonan and Marshall. I went to London, and then I went to Vegas with it, and I was out on my own for the first time, and it was quite wonderful.

But Tommy died at 48. He was a brilliant comic, and he would make a million dollars. He did a thing called promises, promises, not the Broadway show long before the Broadway show with, with Jane Mansfield. And it was just awful, but she's new through the whole thing.

And nobody had ever done that. And, and he, they couldn't get a release on it. And anyway, his wife called me, pokey called me one night. I said,

think about these pictures in playboy magazine of Tommy and Jay Mansfield nude all over the place. I said, honey, go to bed. You're going to get a release. And that's exactly what happened. Tom made a fortune that he went to Europe and bought all these terrible movies. He went broke again. Then he did another movie. And when he got sick, he wasn't doing well.

But he was one of the, I called him the Irish Mike Todd, up and down, up and down. But he was fun. Did you guys do a pilot for Jackie Gleason? I did, Marshall and Farrell. Marshall and Farrell, without Tommy. Yeah, Marshall and Farrell. That was Cafe Mardi Gras. You could buy it, by the way.

They showed it the other night at my birthday party. They showed a portion of it. What is it called? It's called Cafe Mardi Gras. Wow. He loved the way I sang. I used to work at Billy Gray's Bail Box with Tommy, and he always come in. He was doing The Life of Riley. People don't remember Jackie Gleason doing The Life of Riley.

Oh, yeah, sure. But he did it, yeah. Skinnier Jackie Gleason. And when I'd work in New York, he'd always be there. He said, Pally, I'm going to do a pilot. Pally, and Tommy would get excited. Tommy Farrell. I said, he's drunk. Don't worry about it. He came in. He said, we're doing a pilot.

They shot one of the most expensive pilots ever done at that color studio up on Broadway. I had the Paul Whiteman Orchestra, Paul Whiteman. I had as guests Sammy Davis, Hildegard. I had all the dancers. I had the seven Ashtons. And we did this wonderful pilot that they showed at Tootshores on a big screen. It was glorious. And he gave me, he said, go buy yourself a Jaguar. I said, could you lend me four bucks to get to the east side?

And the next day I'm wandering around MCA or William Morris, and they're all looking at it on a small screen. And it looked like an old MGM movie. And I said, this will never sell because it's too big. It was huge. We had 28 dancers. And that's when the screen was small, you know. So it never sold, but it was a good pilot. And I think it's called Cafe Mardi Gras.

Cafe Mardi Gras. We'll look for that. We'll definitely look for it. I read an odd story of some hotel you worked at where the owner of the hotel did jail time for, I think, you long. Yes. I could talk about i'm not going to mention names uh only because it's a long time ago but i'm sure there's some offshoots a guy i knew very well uh only after he got out of jail went to jail for nine years and when he got out of jail they gave gave him the Roosevelt Hotel in New Orleans.

And that was his hotel, lock, stock, and barrel. And he was just one of the most genteel, nice men I ever knew. And we used to work at all the time. Yeah, I worked at the Roosevelt Hotel in New Orleans. You mean he was instructed to take the fall for Huey Long? I don't know how it worked out, but he took the fall for Huey Long. Yeah,'t know how it worked out, but he took the fall for Huey Long. Nine years, yeah. But he did the jail time for Huey Long. Nine years. Wow.

But he had a beautiful hotel when he came out. What do you remember about your Dean Martin roast, Peter? I was looking at some of it today on YouTube, and it's fascinating to see Foster Brooks and Orson Welles and Joey Bishop and your friend Vincent Price and everybody giving you the business. I was so busy in those days. I was working Vegas about 27 weeks a year.

I was doing Hollywood Squares. I was doing specials, and I get a call from Greg Garrison. That was his show. He was the producer. He said, hey, Kitty, I go back to the old Kate Smith show when he was directing that. He said, hey, we want to roast you on the Dean Martin show. I said, I don't have time. And he said, it's 35,000 and it takes you about two hours. I said, I'll be there. And I had turned it down. But Greg, I went there and I did the show and it was, and what's his

name? The guy that used to write for Burrell. What the heck was his name? He wrote for years. It was just the worst material in the world. So I called a couple of guys, and they wrote to me some nice jokes. Zsa Zsa's a nice scene. They should have you sitting up. Her name is Rosemary. The reason being her family didn't want her to have a last name.

Some cute stuff, but I had a great joke. I said, Orson, it's so good to see Orson again. I was stationed on him in World War II. They cut that joke. But these guys wrote me some real cute stuff, you know. And if I could do anything, I could do that kind of stuff. And it was wonderful. I got all these wonderful reactions. And I have it. I have it, which is so nice. I have a lot of old stuff, you know, that they showed the other night. They showed a lot of stuff the other night, things I never saw.

Yeah, it was really fun. It was a wonderful party they threw me. And you were talking about Tony Randall? Tony Randall. You know what his real name was? Leonard Rosenberg. You got it. But there's a piece in your book about him not being terribly cooperative on the squares.

And you called him out on the air? I did. And he was very upset. And he said, you know, that was very unprofessional. And I said to him, I said, you know something, Tony? You're a pain in the ass, but you're dead right. That was unprofessional. And he was right. I should never have done it on the show. But he kept interrupting and kept going. And I finally said, I said, Tony, for God, you're a

pain in the butt. And he was very taken back. But he came back. He kept doing the show. And I liked him so much. But he could be a pain, yeah. But he, you know, he was very good to Klugman. I don't think Klugman had a piece of Odd Couple. And when the show was over, I know that Tony gave him a piece. And Klugman didn't have to work for the rest of his life, I think. He did, but he didn't have to.

That's nice. So Tony Randall helped support Klugman. Yeah, he was very nice to Klugman, yeah, because it was his deal. Here's some more stuff about squares, Peter, that's the fun stuff in the book. I mean, can you tell us what the locks box was?

Oh, yeah. It was the square on the bottom, the three squares, the one in the middle, because it rarely got called upon. So if somebody was really dull, we would put them there. Lox L-O-X. That was the Lox box. Right.

Right. And there's a story about Red Fox giving a hard time, like kind of harassing. Oh, it's Sandy Duncan. Yeah. I'm doing the show. I'm doing the show, and Sandy Duncan is going, oh. I said, what the heck's going on? Well, he was saying to her, hey, have you ever seen a black one? I'm going to show you a black one right here. And he was doing all this terrible stuff to Sandy Duncan, you know?

So after the show, she was crying and they said, what are we going to do? And I said, don't worry about it. We put Tony Fields next to her. That'll do it. We put her up where Tony was. Oh, God. Fun. You want to talk about fun. That was fun.

And another time, a contestant showed up. Let me see if you remember this story. And Pat Buttram, who was one of the celebrities, recognized the contestant. Oh, yeah. We couldn't use her, right? Because she was a courtesan. Yeah, a lady of the evening. Talk about Pat Buttram.

He wrote jokes for everybody, you know, for nothing. He was one of the best joke writers that ever lived. Mr. Haney from Green Acres. The last thing he ever did was with me in Linton, Indiana for Phil Harris. Phil Harris was a very close friend. I know Phil all my life because of my sister. It's too long a story, but I've known him since I'm a teenager. And I just loved him to death. And I would go back to Linton with like Roy Clark and other people and do shows for his birthday. And we'd play golf or whatever. And the last time he went back, he went back with me. And the last time Pat ever worked was with me at Linton.

It was Roy Clark, Pat Buttroman, myself My goodness And he got sick But he would write jokes for every He was one of the great joke writers And one of the funniest men you ever want to know Yeah He was very close to Gary Owens

Gary's gone now Yeah, we wanted to have Gary on this show in the worst way Yeah, he was terrific And my on this show in the worst way. Yeah, he was terrific. And my neighbor lived right around the corner from me. What do you remember about Gary Owens, who, for our audience, was the announcer of the live? And many other things. Yeah, but Gary was one of the top radio guys. I'm on Music of Your Life.

I've been doing Music of Your Life for over 20 years. You can catch me in New York. I have two stations in New York. I used to have 208 AM stations. Now we're down to 36, but I'm like you guys. I'm on the internet. Just go to musicofyourlife.com. I'm on at 9 o'clock on the West Coast every day for two hours

and at noon, I guess, in New York. I don't listen to the show. It's radio, and I tape it right around the corner. In fact, it's Tito Jackson's old studio. It's his mansion right here in Encino. I've been on it. But Gary was on Music of Your Life and Wink Martindale and all. And he taught me an awful lot about radio. And I play all big band music and all the great singers. My thing is all 40s, 50s music. And I play all big band music and all the great singers. My thing is all 40s, 50s music. I know everybody I talk about.

I've worked with most of the people, and I tell stories and play this music. And it's been very successful, actually, for 20-some years. But Gary was one of the top radio guys in the country, yeah. A versatile talent. And he did voice. He did cartoon voice service. He was the original voice of Space Ghost. He and what's his name?

Stan. Well, not Stan. Stan Freeberg? Yeah, but the other guy, the little tiny guy. Well, anyway, they were big voiceover guys. Stan Irwin? No. No.

No. Your audience wouldn't even know him. You guys wouldn't know. You know how I first met him? I was doing The Millionaire. Remember The Millionaire? Sure. He gave away a million dollars a year. I was getting, I think, $750 working the whole week.

And the first shot, we're all getting makeup. The first shot, this Rolls Royce picks up, pulls up, and this little tiny guy, Paul Freese. Paul Freese. Oh, Paul Freese. The most famous of all. Yeah, sure. And the busiest of all. Greatest voiceover. Paul Freese gets out of this Rolls. He's in a suit.

They go, he sits in a chair. They make up his hand. They make up his hand. And he's got a script in front of him. Well, today's recipient of the Millionaire. And he reads it, gives Marvin Miller the envelope, and he gets to the Rolls millionaire and he reads it gives uh marvin miller the envelope and he gets in the rolls and he leaves he was paid like 2500 i said that's what i want to do that's uh but paul he was the millionaire but you never saw him all you saw

was the hand the hand and the envelope oh he did millions of movies and cartoons yeah he was so big that he wouldn't go to a studio. He finally lived up in San Francisco. You would have to fly to his studio to record him. That's how big he was. Orson Welles didn't want to do the wine commercial, so he did it, and he sounded just like Orson Welles. Oh, he looped Orson Welles.

He became on radio. That'ses. He became on radio. That's great. He was on radio. So something before its time, remember that? Oh, Paul Masson. Yeah. No wine before its time. Finally, it wound up that Orson Welles started doing it himself

because he's out of all this money. But Paul Frees could do anybody he was brilliant yeah we will return to gilbert godfrey's amazing colossal podcast but first a word from our sponsor tell us about i was telling gilbert this from the book and it's a fun a fun story and i believe you have this framed in your house as a letter from John Wayne. A threatening letter. He's going to beat me up. I love this. Yeah, I got this letter from John Wayne, and it goes on and on. And the question was, according to Rona Barrett, what did John Wayne's children call him?

And the answer was, sir. Well, he took umbrage to that and wrote me this. He's going to beat me up. And I have to do it on the air to apologize. And if not, I've got that. It's one of my prized possessions. Yeah, I have it in my house. And I have it framed with John's picture and guns all around it. I don't have a recording, unfortunately, but I once did a joke about Marlon Brando on Hollywood Squares, and Whoopi Goldberg received an angry phone call from Marlon Brando. Oh, there you go.

People watch the show. Yeah. I also have to ask you about another fun squares question that's in the book, Peter. Did you, Rosemary, Paul Lynn, Karen, Valentine, and Annette Fabre all go to a topless bar? We did. It wasn't a topless bar. It was a nude place. I mean, everybody was nude.

A nude bar. Excuse me. And it just opened in Van Nuys. And now we're doing squares. And I said, hey, this nude place is just open. And let's all go. So it was Rosemarie and Paul. And I was very close to Charles Nelson Reilly.

It was Charlie, Nanette Fabre. Love her. We went. And they had not only nude, 18-year-old nude dancers, they had these graphic movies showing on the wall. And after about eight minutes, I said, you know something, this is really, it was boring. So we left. About three minutes after we left, it was raided.

Would that have been wonderful to have us all in jail? Oh, my God. In a nude bar. And Rosemary and Karen Valentine. I laughed so hard. in a nude bar and Rosemary and Karen Valentine. And then that I was, oh, I laughed so hard. I said,

that would have been so much fun. It was rated about three minutes after we left. Yeah. Yeah. I love that one night. Yeah. We, we had a lot of fun on that show.

And then some. Now I was surprised to hear that the great character actor, Sid Gould. Sid Gould? Did you love Sid Gould? Do you know that he once did an act with Ralph Young? Remember Sandler and Young? Sure. Oh, yes.

Yeah. We saw that on Cliff Nesteroff's website. We still want to get Tony Young on the show. Ralph Young and Tony Sandler. Tony Sandler. Tony Sandler, Ralph Young. Yeah. We want to get him on the show. No, Ralph Young and Tony Sandler. Tony Sandler. Tony Sandler, Ralph Young. Yeah, we want to get him on this show. No, you can get Tony, Ralph's gone. If you get Ralph, let me know.

I'd love to see him again. He was my production singer. I used to play the Latin Quarter maybe for 15 years in New York. I had to play with Noonan and Marshall and Marshall and Farrell. We'd play it a couple of months a year. I don't know if it's in New York. I had to play with Noonan and Marshall and Marshall and Farrell. We'd play it a couple of months a year. I don't know if it's in the book. Did I ever tell you the Sophie Tucker story? Is that in the book?

Oh, no, we were going to ask you about it. It's on my card. You did the Sullivan show with Sophie Tucker, didn't you? No, I was working the Latin Quarter. Oh, the Latin Quarter. Yeah, and I was there three months with her. It said Sophie Tucker and Noonan and Marshall. Or it could have been Marshall and Noonan, whatever.

Marshall and Farrah. Anyway, in the three months, all she ever said to me was, that was about it. She was just mean, and she was, I tell you. Well, I don't know what the, one of the dancers did something. He may have done a crossover in front of her, but she tried to get him fired and ed rissian who ran the latin quarter wouldn't do it of course and but she had him i

don't know what but he was very upset this is a true story he came in the next night with a sophie tucker doll he made a voodoo doll and in front of all of us in front of all of us, in front of all of us, this is true, he took a needle and he stuck it into her left hip. Now, not a week later, not three months, an hour later, she's coming down the steps at the Latin Quarter. She falls and breaks her left hip. And I go, never screw with a dancer at the show. Wow.

Never cross a dancer. Never with the gypsies. Leave them alone. That's a true story. I was there. I saw that. That's my Sophie Tucker story. Wow.

And then she would go after the thing. She would sell books, you know, for charity. Of course, she kept all the money. She was something. There's so many people we could ask you about, Peter, as we wind this down, and there's so many questions, and we could talk to you for hours, and you're such a great sport. I don't know what to ask you about. Sammy, Jonathan Winters, your money.

Sammy started, that was our opening act, the Wilmaston Trail. Paid him $750 a week, Noonan Marshall's opening act, yeah. Mastin Trio. Paid him $7.50 a week. New England Marshalls opening act, yeah. How about that, Gil? Yeah. And you know what they used to give Sammy? Will? Will?

They'd give him $8 a week. And his teeth were going bad. So I took him to my dentist, Dr. Gamble, and got his teeth fixed. Yeah, I go back a long time. You know, when he became famous, there was a long time he didn't speak to me. And I couldn't figure out why. And now I'm in London. There's this wonderful private club that all the actors belong to.

And I'm with Cheetah and a bunch of us. And I'm at the bar. And he comes over to me. He was living in London at the time. He comes over to me. He said, hey, man, I'm sorry. And I looked at him. And I said, you little little shit you should be sorry

you know i don't know why he didn't talk to me i have no idea because i would never do anything yeah i loved him he was like family to me i just loved him so sammy davis you helped out well everybody hey there are many people that helped me out in the old days that's what we did we each helped everybody we wouldn't steal material if we were in a club and say we're at eddie's in kansas city and we say we'd say to the eddie brothers hey there's a great act you know uh we plug each other we helped each other it was a family affair in the old days. Yeah. Not as crazy as it is today. I wouldn't want to be young and, and, uh, trying to fight the battle today. And what was Vincent Price like? The best. I knew him since I was 18. As I said, I, I, you know, I, Dick Hames was the number one

guy over at Fox and he was on the contract to Fox. And I first met Vincent when I was 18. And he was another devil baby. And he was just, we took cruises together, you know? He and Coral Brown, he married this wonderful English actress. And we took cruises together, and we were close. Yeah, he was a wonderful man. There's a salacious story in your book. Can I bring it up?

Of course. With your ex-wife and Coral Brown and Vinnie and Vincent Price said to you? Oh, yes. We were on a cruise and it was Coral, I think, that said to Sally, she said,

you know, you, Vinnie and myself would make a lovely trio. And Sally laughed a lot to his wife. She came back and said, I've just been, I've had a wonderful offer. Now, did you ever work with Jerry Lewis? I've opened for Jerry many times, yeah. When I put my act together in 1977, I put an act with five kids very successfully. We, we worked continually for about 11 years called the chapter five.

Monica Mancini was my lead singer. I needed a break in date and Joey Stabile, Dick Stabile's brother was his manager. And I needed a break in date because we had a date at the Flamingo. We went in for four weeks for Bill Miller, a wonderful man. And Jerry heard about it, and he called and said, I'm here at this outdoor theater.

I'll be here a week. I need an opening act. I've only got 9,000, but you are welcome to come. And we came in. What a great break because we broke in the act. We opened the Flamingo. I got a five-year deal with Suma, you know, with Howard Chooses. Jerry, I opened for at the Sahara many times and other places. And he was wonderful to me.

You hear these stories. He was wonderful to my singers. I don't have a bad thing to say about Jerry Lewis. Wow. That's good to hear. And you made a movie with Art Carney and Lucy. I did. Yeah.

You could probably get that on – it was a television movie called Happy Anniversary and Goodbye. Right. And we talk about Art Carney on this show. He's a favorite of Gilbert's and mine. What can you tell us about him? Well, I was offered the movie, and I turned it down. I had worked with Lucy on The Lucy Show. I played her brother-in-law with the great Janet Waldo, the great radio actress, played my wife.

And it was the time of the Cuban crisis, and I have four kids. I'm just worried about where I'm going to hide them. And they're worried about the show. And Lucy wasn't very nice to me. In fact, she was awful to me. And well, I must say after the show, she knocked on my door. She said, you were wonderful on this show. And they offered me 13 shows.

And I turned it down and I needed the job. I just didn't want to work with her. So many years later, I'm doing squares and I'm kind of hot. And they, they called me and said, Hey, they want you, Lucy wants you for this movie called happy anniversary and goodbye.

I said, no, I don't want to do this movie. I don't want to work with that woman. So they called me back about, oh gosh, two days later. And,

uh, her husband at the time said, are you nuts? Everybody in this town, every young guy wants this part. I said, I don't want to work with your wife. And he said, you don't have any seeds with my wife. All your seeds are with Art Carney. I said, I'll do it for scale? And I had met Art Carney, but I never worked with him. And I got to work with Art Carney. Now, we're doing the read-through. You do a read-through. I said, have you ever worked with Lucille Ball before? He said, no. He said, I'm really excited about it. I said, you'll quit. He said, I'm not going to quit. Well, we're doing the read-through.

She said, that's a terrible reading. He thought she was kidding. And she starts criticizing his read. Well, he quits. So I grab him, and I said, you can't do this to me. Art, the only reason I'm doing this damn thing is because of you. It's the only reason I'm doing it. Well, the next day, so we came back the next day, Nanette Fabre, she quits. Now, Art and I are after Nanette Fabre. Actually, he became very close to Lucy. She was strange.

I guess socially, I was never socially with her. They say she was lovely. But to work with her, she was a tough old broad. And what people adore her, and she has such nice kids i mean lucy young lucy is just wonderful i don't know her son too well didn't she show up on the set of squares complaining uh yes she wanted uh more things and she wanted him to have his own square yeah it was the day that day was Desi and Bobby and Fred. I don't know what they were.

Desi, Dino, and Billy. There you go. She wanted his own square. They were all in one square. They were all in one square. But she was there every show. She came, boy, she was there. She was a good mama.

But that was my story. But I can remember Arnold Schwarzenegger. It's his first part. Oh, that's right. I've seen the clip.ger. It's his first part. Oh, that's right. I've seen the clip. Yeah. He's a masseuse. He's a masseuse.

Right. And he comes in. He's as big as a house, and he has one line or something. And Art Carney ad-libbed this. We did it in front of an audience. You know, you do it live. He walks in, and he sees this guy, and then he leaves, and then he says goodbye to Lucille Schwarzenegger. Arden just looks, and he says, ete, brute.

There's one story in the book. Now, I know you wrote the book over 13 years ago, Peter, but I'm going to jog your memory on this one. Diana Doors. Do you know the story I'm referring to? A real name? Yeah. Yeah. You know, I just did a thing with her son. We just shot a thing with Alex Trebek. He's the special for Canada. And he did a special on all the game show hosts. And his son is the director.

And that's Diane. It's Dickie Dawson. Dickie Dawson's son. She was Richard Dawson's wife. And I said, who's your mom? He said, Diana Doris. And there's a story that goes, I wasn't there, but the story is her real name is Diana Fluck.

That's her real name, Diane Fluck. That's her real name, Diane Fluck. That's her real name. And a guy, it was in England, and the guy was very nervous about Fluck. And he said, here she is, Diane Clunt. Now, I don't know if that's a true story, but it's a funny story.

Whether it's true or not. It's too good. I took a Post-it and put it right on that story. I said, Gilbert will like that one. Hey, Gilbert, you got to read the book. It's a good read. that we have to shoehorn in here that Glenn Ford, when he was on the show, one of the questions had to do with silk stockings. Yeah.

And I think, do you remember what Glenn Ford said? I think, I think we told it. Did we open the roof? No, we were off mic then. Oh, yeah, yeah. We were off mic. We're going to repeat it. Yeah, you repeat the story though. Well, yeah. We were off mic. We're going to repeat it. Yeah, you repeat the story, though.

Well, you had said in the book that you always tried to – he was afraid of looking – he was insecure and he was afraid of looking dumb. So you always asked him questions about things he knew. You always played to his strengths. Yes, that's true. Questions about guns in the military and Westerns. Yeah. But at one point you asked him a question about women's stockings. Oh, yeah.

Should they be kept in the freezer? Correct. Yeah. And he said, go ahead. I forget. He said, how the hell should I know? Ask Vincent Price? Ask Cesar Romero.

Oh, Cesar Romero. He said, how the hell should you ask Cesar Romero? Oh, God. Cesar Romero's name has popped up several times in this podcast. There's another sweet man. In fact, you know how old he would have been today? He said to me once, he was so sad. I said, what's wrong with you?

He said, I'm going to be 60 today. He said, I'm 60 years old today. I said, what's wrong with that? You look great. He said, yeah, but in 10 years, I'm going to be 70. We played a, I did a Fantasy Island where we were, I was married to Jane Powell, and she was having an affair with Cesar Romero.

Butch Romero. Butch Romero. Butch. That's what we all called him, Butch. And a nicer man never lived. Well, I tell you, the old guys, they were the best. I think we all came out of poverty, and we just appreciate what we had. You've had a charmed run, Peter. You've had a wonderful—the people you've worked with.

It's my 75th year doing this stuff you know yeah congratulations thank you the book is terrific thank you i i wish you could buy it i wish i could get some kind of a royalty out of it our fans will find it okay you're still working i am i've still got the music of your life. And one cute story. I just worked at Cerritos, which is a beautiful performing arts center. I do big band concerts. I just worked with the Tex Medici band. Tex is no longer with us, but the band is. And we did very well. So my manager, she's only been with me 60-some years, Gloria Burke.

We've been together forever. And her birthday is next week. She's going to be 90. Anyway, she called. She said, hey, the Cerritos want you back. And they want you with the Benny Goodman band in March. This is like six weeks ago. I said, well, hey, that's pretty good.

That's really soon. She said, no, March 2017. I said, if I can remember my name or a lyric I'll show up you know you look great to us you look like you're in fine fettle I am in fine fettle and I do I still work I still garden I still go I got the most wonderful wife in the world I got 12 grandkids I got seven great grandkids and uh my life is just about as good as you can get. This is something I was going to say. It's like anyone listening to this show knows your voice sounds exactly the same. Yeah.

We grew up on the squares and your voice hasn't changed at all. No, it hasn't. I'm singing better than I've ever sung in my life. Don't ask me why. The other night when they had my birthday, they had me singing, you know, with Dionne Warwick. They had me sing with Dinah from the Gordon Jenkins thing and then other stuff. And, you know, I never would watch my stuff.

I would look and this sounds awful. But I said, that's pretty good. You know, that's pretty good. And I got to say, we're both looking at you now. And we're not looking at a 90-year-old man. We're looking at Peter Marshall. Oh, well, thank you. You look the same.

You look terrific. We're not blowing smoke up your skirt. Well, good. You can buy my CDs. My CDs are for sale. Go ahead and plug them. Go ahead. I just did a CD that's kind of nice.

It's called Let's Be Frank with a Touch of Tommy, where I recreated the Pied Pipers, Joe Stafford, but taking all the old songs and redoing them completely, doing them as they might have been done today. So it's called Let's Be Frank with a Touch. Then I have a CD that did really well. It's still out there. It's called Boy Singer. What are you guys reading? You're reading something.

We got a note and we're going to put you on the spot since we're talking about your singing. We're going to ask you if you could just croon a couple of bars of something for us. Maybe from Bye Bye Birdie, your choice. Gray skies are going to clear up. Put on a happy

face. Brush off the clouds and cheer up. Hey, put on a happy face. Take off that gloomy mask of tragedy. It's not your style. There you go. I love it. Wow. He sounds great. So not only is

your speaking voice the same, but your singing voice. It is. It's exactly the same. I looked at the other night and I laughed. I said, my God, that was 40 years ago. Fantastic. And the last thing we're going to ask, and this is completely off the reservation. We talk about somebody on this show.

He was better known by the name Crazy Guggenheim. Oh, yes. Frankie Fontaine. You worked with Frankie Fontaine. We worked with Billy Grace Bambach. It was our first big job. Pauly Bergen got us the job. Pauly Bergen was singing in a little joint.

It used to be very popular. Hackett worked it. Everybody worked. Billy Graves Bandbox. What a beautiful little club. It was a Jewish club. And we were about as goyim as you could get, you know. And Pauly said there was an opening, and she said to Max Gold,

she said, hey, these two guys are working down on Slauson. They would be a big hit here. And we went in for one night and stayed 16 weeks. Wow. And that was the beginning. And Polly got us that job. And she was a country singer in those days. Her opening song was, honky tonkin, honky tonkin, I'm just.

She was a country singer. I remember Polly Bergen. Did you know that, Gil-tonkin', I'm just. She was a country singer. I remember Polly Bergen. Did you know that, Gil? Oh, I didn't know. She was a country singer, yeah. I remember her in Cape Fear. Oh, my God, yeah. She was a wonderful actress.

She was really very close to Rex Reed. I'm close to Rex. And they were like brother and sister, really. He adored her. But Frankie Fontaine came in with us. They would use, there would be like six acts it would be uh robert maxwell who wrote ebtide and shagrall he played the harp and i'd be the mc this is a true story this is when when reagan became president i was a little anxious about it

uh i used to mc the show and tommy would heckle me and i would say now ladies and gentlemen and he would say you're a damn good looking fellow i mean you're damn good looking i said thank you very much sir and i would go on and then he'd say i i then he would do other stuff but he kept your damn good looking well he finally uh after about three acts it was our turn and i would say something about pittsburgh i do player. He said, I'm from Pittsburgh. I'm from Pittsburgh. And he got up, and he walked up on stage, and the guy sitting in the front grabbed him and said, young man, I've taken just about enough of this I can take. This man has been working hard all night.

And it was Ronald Reagan. Wow. Oh, my God. Whoa. He was the only guy that didn't know. So when he became president, I went, okay, all right. Good stuff. But the funny thing is he and Noonan became very close friends.

Reagan and Noonan. Yeah. Well, this is – you're one of those guests that we could go another 20 hours with and not touch upon. You're also one of those guests that makes the interview easy because you do all the work. Oh, yes. Colossal Podcast with my co-host, Frank Santopadre at Nutmeg Post with our engineer, Frank Verderosa. Thank you, Frankie. And the great Peter Marshall. Well, thank you, guys. Peter, it's been a treat. Give us your plugs one more time. The radio show. Radio show, Music of Your Life. Just I'm on two hours in the morning, and they repeat it at night.

Nine on the west, so I guess it's 12 in the east. And Boy Singer you can get. No happy endings. A thing called Let's Be Frank with a Touch of Tommy. You can buy them all through Amazon. And they're pretty good, guys. They're really – We're going to get them and listen.

Well, if you like Dick Hames or Sinatra or Bob Eberle, that whole era, I think you'll like what I do. And once more, the book, Backstage with the Original Hollywood Square. And it comes, I must say, this is interesting, it comes with a CD. It does. It comes with a CD of your favorite jokes from the show, your favorite zingers. You'll hear everybody ever heard on those zingers. That record sold a fortune, but I didn't know that that was Heta Quigley who gave me the permission to put it in the book. We barely scratched the surface of this man's career.

And as someone who is a later regular on Hollywood Squares in the 2000 years, I bow down to you, sir. Oh, thank you, Gilbert. That's so sweet of you. And I love your work. I really do. Oh, thank you. Well, Peter, there's a clip online of Gilbert you should check out of him on the most recent version of Hollywood Squares. Oh, really? Just look up Gilbert Gottfried, Hollywood Squares, and you fool. You

fool. Gilbert Gottfried, Hollywood Squares, you fool? You fool. You'll love it. Okay, we'll do that right now. Yeah, it's a good laugh for you. And thanks so much, buddy. Thank you, Peter Marshall. Good luck, guys.