Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - GGACP Classic: Stephen Bishop

Episode Date: December 15, 2022

GGACP celebrates the 40th anniversary of the celebrated comedy "Tootsie" (released December 17, 1982) by revisiting this memorable 2019 episode with Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter Stephen Bishop ("It Might Be You"). In this episode, Stephen talks about secret song origins, Beatles trading cards, the glory days of Top 40, auditioning for Diana Ross and Smokey Robinson and chumming around with Burt Bacharach, John Belushi, Carrie Fisher and Harry Nilsson. Also, Bob Dylan hails a cab, Warren Beatty eats a bowl of chili, Gilbert swipes shampoo from Donald Fagen and Stephen and Linda Ronstadt cover “The Monster Mash.” PLUS: Frank Sinatra Jr! Praising Randy Newman! (and Jimmy Webb)! “Sex Kittens Go to College”! And Stephen cameos in “Animal House,” “The Blues Brothers” and “Kentucky Fried Movie”! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Trivia and dirty jokes, an evening with the boys. Once is never good enough for something so fantastic. So here's another Gilbert and Franks Here's another Gilbert and Franks Here's another Gilbert and Franks Colossal classic I'm alright Nobody but about me Why you got to give me a fight? Can't you just let it be? Hi, this is Kenny Loggins, and you're gilbert godfrey's amazingossal Podcast with my co-host Frank Santopadre.

Our guest this week is a singer, occasional actor, a record producer, a platinum-selling and Grammy-nominated recording artist, and one of the most prolific and admired songwriters of his generation. and admired songwriters of his generation, composing hit singles like Everybody Needs Love, Save It For A Rainy Day, and one of the most popular and frequently played songs of the 1970s, On and On. His songs have been recorded by Barbara Streisand, Art Garfunkel, Eric Clapton, Steve Perry, The Four Tops, Johnny Mathis, David Crosby, and our upcoming podcast guest, Kenny Loggins, and Luciano Pavarotti, to name just a few.

And Phil Collins. And Phil Collins. And Phil Collins. And Phil Collins. Shut up and let me talk. And he's worked alongside talents like Chaka Khan, Michael McDonald, Sting,

Dionne Warwick, David Foster, Phil Collins. Phil Collins, see, you didn, David Foster, Phil Collins. Phil Collins, see, you didn't have to interrupt me before. Sorry, it was my manager's fault. It's written down here. And even his good friend, Carrie Fisher. He also has written songs for a number of movies, including The China Syndrome, Rhodey, Unfaithfully Yours, Arthur,

Mickey and Maude, Heart and Souls, Summer Lovers, The Boy Who Could Fly, The Money Pit, as well as the title song in the classic comedy, National Lampoon's Animal House, a movie he also famously appeared in. He also penned the number one Billboard hit and Oscar-nominated ballad, Separate Lives, from the film White Nights, and recorded the unforgettable love song, It Might Be You, from the movie Tootsie. His brand new album is called We'll Talk About It in the Car. And he's also working on a memoir and have appeared in 1977's Kentucky Fried Movie. Please welcome to the show a performer of multiple talents, a songwriter's songwriter, and a man who says he was once confronted by Bob Marley's wife

over a song lyric that she didn't like. The very inventive Stephen Bishop. The very inventive. I like that. I'm going to invent something here. We also got the name of the album wrong, so we're going to correct it. We'll talk about it later in the car. That's all right.

Yes. Now, before anything else, last time, and if not, we'll have to have a different beginning. We had Kenny Loggins on, and he had worked with Michael McDonald. And I asked him to do a Michael McDonald imitation. Can you do a Michael McDonald imitation? Yes, I can. You've come to the right place, Gil. I can do a lot of imitations.

I'm really good at imitations. Let's see. The whole world sounds like Michael McDonald, and I want to sound like Michael McDonald, too. And I do. That's pretty good. I knew you could do it. Excellent. That's by Michael, what's his name, Silvershire?

Something like that. This guy wrote a whole thing about Michael McDonald. He went through a period of time when he was just singing. He sang on a bunch of my albums. Yes, he did. He was terrific. Yeah. Yeah.

I also do Billie Holiday. Let's hear it. Go right ahead. But it sounds a hell of a lot like Diana Ross. Here it goes. If I go out on Sunday and cabaret all day Monday, ain't nobody's business if I do. If I get beat up by my papa and I don't call no copper, ain't nobody's business if I do. Ain't nobody's business if I do.

Wow. Steven, we're blown away. Wow. Okay, just keep going. Oh, I do a couple of things. I do Bob Dylan hailing a cab in New York City. All right, ready? Yeah.

Tixie. Tixie. What do you do? Oh, I do a little bit of Diana Ross. Okay. But it sounds a hell of a lot like Billie Holiday, as I said. Do you know where you're going to? Do you like the things that life is showing you?

Where are you going to? Do you know? Impressive. Would you like to hear some of Gilbert's Peter Lorre, Stephen? Yeah, I remember Peter Lorre. Give him a taste, Gil. No, it's you who ruined it. You, it's your stupid attempt to buy it.

Kevin found out how valuable it was. You imbecile. You blundering fathead! What do you think? That's the weirdest impression I've ever heard. How did you get around to Peter Lorre? Do some more singing ones.

I can do, I can do, who else do I do? I do a bunch of them. I do, uh, uh, you know, uh, I do a whole bunch. Oh, I do, who else do I do? I do a bunch of them. I do, you know, I do a whole bunch. Oh, I do Enrique Iglesias. Excellent. Lay it on us. Excellent. Let's see.

Okay. Billy, don't be a hero. Don't make a fool of your life. Billy, don't be a hero. Come back and make me your wife. It's not just Enrique Iglesias. Enrique Iglesias sings Bo Donaldson and the Haywoods. That's impressive.

I do more. I just can't think of it. What is it more I do? Wow. I don't know. What's weird, I'm still recovering, you know, because I walked in this grocery store last week, and this woman walks up to me, right?

I was picking out the perfect cauliflower or the other cauliflower. Anyway, this woman goes, oh, it's you. I can't believe it. You're the greatest. I've been listening to your music all my life, and you're just incredible. And I'm like, well, you know. And she's like oh i love your music and your song short people was like one of my

oh well yeah yeah so i know i'm thinking i'm leaving somebody will you tell randy that story oh oh right wait wait a minute. I do Super Tramp. Okay. Because I always thought they sounded Indian. When I was young, I was also logical, mystical, all phenomenal, criminal. Oh, tell me what would you do if I found you a vegetable. Oh, my God. I got a new puppy, and his name is Randy Newman.

I swear to God, that's his name. And, you know, we were just on the road, and we had to take him with us. And it was like people would come by our hotel room, and I'd be in there going, Randy Newman, why did you do that? I could just imagine what people would think. Well, you must do a Randy Newman then, I take it.

What? You must do a Randy Newman imitation. Oh, I don't. Not really. I don't. No. I love Randy. Yes, he's great. Love him. I sang on one of his albums, which is really great. No, I don't. I don't. Who was I doing just the other day?

Oh, I don't know. I'm blanking. But that's about it. That's a good repertoire. Okay. We'd like to thank you for coming on. Yeah, right. Tell the Bob Marley story that we have in the intro, because it's a funny, it's a story worth telling.

Which what? The Bob Marley story that we put into the intro. it's a funny it's a story worth telling the which what the bob marley story that we put into the intro oh dear okay well on and on it was like a big hit and everything was going great and everything i went to this party one weekend and um a lot of people there and i was introduced to bob marley's widow uh Rita Marley, I think her name is. Yes. And she said to me, are you Stephen Bishop? I was like, yeah. She goes, Jamaican women, they do not break your heart and steal your money.

Which is the first line of on and on, you know. Down in Jamaica, they got lots of pretty women steal your money. Then they break your heart. Well, I shouldn't have probably said that, but I was using poetic license. Of course. And so, so I, I told her that it was poetic license. And I was like a question. It was like, no, she wouldn't take that. So I, I kind of like kind of disappeared from the party, and I went in the kitchen, you know. And I'm like back there in the kitchen, and I'm trying to find something to do.

And they had like a Jamaican cook. So I go, hi there. He goes, hey, man. And I just thought, uh-oh, I better not have her tell him the whole story. It's a weird story. I'm trying to get past Bob Dylan hailing a cab. That was great. D's a weird story. I'm trying to get past Bob Dylan hailing a cab. That was great.

Big C. Yeah. Yeah. And if you think of another singing imitation, you do right at town. I'll just ask my manager here. She'll probably come up

with something. What do you got there? What? Anyway, never mind. We'll talk about it later in the car. Yes. Tell us where that comes from. We'll talk about it later in the car.

It's a weird kind of interesting story. It's actually a great kind of, I don't know if this is the right term, non-sequitur, or like if you have to leave the conversation, you go, yeah, really? Yeah, pygmies do fly. Okay. We'll talk about it later in the car. And it's just a great way to bring yourself away from whatever's going on. But really, I dated Carrie Fisher for like two weeks back in 70-what year?

I don't know. It was after she did the first star wars and um we went to saturday night live one time and she was like funny about holding my hand i'm thinking oh she slept with everybody here you know she didn't want to hold my hand so finally she gets on this phone not a cell phone they weren't So finally, she gets on this phone, not a cell phone. They weren't invented yet. So she gets on this little, remember like Saturday Night Live had those little booths where you could talk? Yes. Like a little phone booth? Yes.

Well, she gets on this phone, and she's talking to somebody. And I walk by her, and I'm thinking, oh, man, I've really blown it, and she doesn't like me. And then I hear her say, anyway, we'll talk about it later in the car. And I thought, what does that mean? And so she comes over. And I said, well, I heard you say, we'll talk about it later. Was that about me? She said, no, no.

My mother used to say that to me when I was a little kid. If we got in an argument, Debbie Reynolds would say, we'll talk about it later in the car. Love it. So that line just stuck with me for years and years, and I would use it on stage because you say that, and you usually leave people going, huh? So Debbie Reynolds is responsible indirectly or directly for the name of your new album. I guess so.

Yeah. Yeah. By the way. I met her her once she was really great i heard you sneak this phrase into a song and doing my deep research i heard you end the song with we'll talk about it later in the car it was a monster mash cover oh right right with you i was working in the lab late one night when thy eyes beheld of eerie sight i used my friend's dad who was english and he invented the bentley and his name was amherst villers and i knew him you know when i was in england for a while and he had this kind of hello be glad you're on the planet you You know, that kind of thing.

And so I used that voice for Monster Mash. It was you, Linda Ronstadt, and your old friend, Andrew Gold. And Carla Bonoff. And Carla Bonoff, right. They were singing background. And, you know, I did the whole thing. Actually, it's getting around finally after all these years, that record. Yeah, that's catnip for Gilbert.

He loves that record. Yeah. That's catnip for Gilbert. He loves that stuff. Now, particularly in your early years when you were a kid, you would write like 20 songs a month or something. And what do you remember? There were weird songs, though. They were like, you know, There's a Hair in Your Enchilada was one song. Fly on Her Lips. Will There Ever Be a Sunday in Nebraska, Beer Can on the Beach.

What's the one you wrote down, Gil? Yes, yes, there's two. Dump the Spittoon over Natty's head? Yes. Yeah, Dump the Spittoon over Natty's head. These are real songs that I wrote. And Benny the Warfret? Yeah, Benny the Warfret, yeah.

Can you sing? Greasy, frisky, full of whiskey, slobbering down the hall. It was this whole song. I was into that. I always say you're not going to be a great songwriter until you get your heart broken. And I hadn't really gotten my heart broken yet, so I was writing weird crap. I sort of like Bennyny the can you sing what you think may

be the worst song you ever wrote well uh the the first song that comes into my mind was um this is really weird i was at this party years and years ago and penny marsha was there and james brooks was there the director and they were talking to me and they said well yeah you're a songwriter but can you write a song in like a half an hour i was like yeah and they'll do it so i went so i went to the other room and i wrote this song and it was called girls bones foundones Found. Like in the paper, you know, Girls Bones Found, you know. It's always like a New York Post headline. Can you sing some of that for us?

I don't know. I don't remember the whole thing, but maybe I'll do some of it. Her name was Jenny Lee and she was all of 17. Big old Tom, he knew it, for he'd seen her through the screen he watched her pick her purple berries from her daddy's field because tom had wanted jenny's berries because they were so ripe to peel girl's bones found and then he oh my god it's all about that. And then the last verse, I think, is, Now the noose is tied around his neck, and the crowd is getting tense. Big old Tom cries, Lord, have mercy.

This is some kind of an experience. But his face is still there on the gallows. He knows all too well he'll spend his time in heaven bowling while Tom will make snowballs in hell. Lord, while Tom will make snowballs in hell. You knock this out in 30 minutes. Yeah, yeah. It's kind of, you know, it's kind of iconic.

Gil, you wanted to ask Stephen way back at the beginning about how he discovered the Beatles. Yes. Yes. It was something you were waiting for the light to change. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I was like a newspaper boy, you know, selling newspapers and all that on the corner in San Diego on, let's see it was like uh 70th and uh something anyway it was right

on the corner where there was a foster freeze and so i was like about 13 12 or 13 when all sudden this convertible pulls up and it's this guy making out with this girl. And on the radio is, I want to hold your hand. I want to hold, you know, and it just sounded like magic to me. It was like, oh my God, you know, and since then I've become such a serious beetleholic. That was a transformative moment. It was, it really was. And I wound up, I didn't have enough money.

I was pretty broke i was raised pretty poor and so i didn't have enough money to buy the beatles first album meet the beatles so i went and got um this album the next best thing was an album called the bugs and so i went i was a big bugs fan for a while i I knew all their songs, you know. I was like, oh, yeah, the Bugs, you know, like the Bugs. So, and then the Beatles came along. I mean, then they had come along. And so I wound up, like, finally getting with it and saving up my money.

And since then, it's like the best thing that ever happened to this world, I think. I even had a dream when i was 15 yeah i call it my beatles dream i was so into the beatles that all i could do you know i was on the on the bus you know trading bubble gum cards with paul oh look here's a good one of paul you know and stuff and so i was doing all that and i was a a major Beatle fan. And I had this dream that I had my own apartment, and it was like I lived on the second floor in this dream. And one day there was a knock on the door, and I went to the door, and it was John Lennon and Paul McCartney at my door.

And I said, wow, guys, what are you doing here? And John said, well well we were in the neighborhood we thought we'd drop in and so Paul went yeah it'd be great yeah yeah so I go wow guys come on in we'll write a song you know so I magically had three guitars and we wrote this song in E, you know? And I don't remember it, really. And then, you know, John Lennon stood up and said, you know, we've got to get going, but we were wondering if you'd like to join the group. And so I said, and Paul said, yeah, it'd be great. Yeah.

So I said, gosh, guys, I'd really like to, but I promised my mom I'd help her clean up the backyard tomorrow. That was my dream. It was a real dream. It's a downer ending, Steven. Yeah, it is kind of a downer ending. I mean, what am I going to say? Yeah, I went off and I was a sixth member of the Dave Clark Five or something.

I don't know. Were you one of those Beatles Saturday morning cartoons? We talk about them on the podcast. You know it. Yeah. You know it. I always did. They never sounded anything like the Beatles.

They weren't even trying to sound like the Beatles. I know. I know. They were like, hey, Paul McCartney over here. It's John Lennon here. We think they sounded like Ronald Coleman. Yeah. It was like, come along, Paul.

We're on an adventure. That's funny. On an adventure. Even before the Beatles came into your life, I mean, you were musical. You loved music. I got a kick out of the fact that you liked the Davy Crockett theme. Oh, that was the first thing that really, well, the first song was Three Coins in a Fountain, you know?

I remember that when I was three. I was sweeping the walk hearing that song. But then when I was five, yeah, it was all about Davy Crockett, man. I even did a version of the theme. I it and it was on an album uh the davy crockett theme really because the the very first part of it is like uh i say i go uh all right come on guys let's quit playing basketball and let's sing a davy crockett theme song, you know? Sing the Davy Crockett theme for us. Oh. Davy, Davy Crockett, king of the wild frontier, killed Tim and Bar and something else.

I don't know. Good enough. I just remember killed Tim and Bar. So the Beatles come along. Your life has changed. You were telling us before we turned the mics on, you were actually studying the clarinet. Yeah, I was my creepy stepfather.

I had a stepfather who just hated, was an opera singer, and he hated the Beatles. And when I saw him on Ed Sullivan, I had to promise that I would clean up the backyard for the rest of my life just to watch the Beatles on Ed Sullivan. And he was like over there. He was like a big guy, you know, and he was like those mop tops, you know, like in disgust, you know.

But they were everything to me. So, yeah. What was the question? I forgot. You were telling us before we turned the mics on that you would try to impress girls in school with a clarinet. Yeah, yeah. He did give me a clarinet. That was his big saving grace.

And I took this clarinet to school that I was in intermediate orchestra and everything. And I would go out to the lunch quad and try and impress this girl, Bernadette Tarantino, who was, like, awesome looking. And she was, like, the hot girl of the school. And I would go out there, and I'd, like, be next to her going, you know, doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo. You know, the song from the Stones, you know, Can't Get No Satisfaction.

On a clarinet. I'll say something else that I shouldn't say. I've never said in an interview. Oh, cool. When I was in eighth grade and the Stones were really happening, all the guys I knew were like experimenting with their units, you know, at that age. And I thought that Mick Jagger's saying,

you can't be a man because he doesn't sperm. I couldn't understand his English accent. And so all of us, all my friends went, yeah, he says, can't be a man. Which is really, he can't be a man because he doesn't smoke the same cigarettes as me. But with his English accent, I thought it was, you know, can't be a man because he doesn't smoke the same cigarettes as me. But with his English accent, I thought it was, you know, can't be a man because he doesn't sperm. You know? What? That's truly bizarre.

Isn't that bizarre? I should have probably said that story. No, my manager's going to give me a tough time now. So tell us about the weeds. Tell us about forming the weeds. Oh, the weeds. Yeah. You know, I was just talking about the weeds like yesterday to some friends of mine.

And I was the leader in the beginning, and I was like 14. And then my lead guitar player formed a coup or something and got me out. And all of a sudden, he was the leader of the Weeds. And I never forget him. As I was leaving, he kicked me in the ass. And I thought, this is really bad. He went, get out of here. I'm the leader.

Boom. And he kicked me in the ass. And I'm walking home going, he kicked me in the ass. I'm not, you know, I finally became the leader again. Over the weeds. Yeah.

We wound up, yeah, I mean, the bass player and I are still great friends, Mark Quincy, and he, when we talk on the phone we have this thing it's been going on for about 20 years

it has to start with hey you jerk no you're the jerk no you're the jerk you're like 12 or something that's sweet that you kept that going yeah he kept that going he loves to do it your stepfather you had a guitar and he wouldn't allow it in the house, I heard.

Well, I finally got a guitar. My brother, Denny, wound up buying me a guitar at Unimart, I think. And, you know, I was thrilled just to have a guitar and he hooked up his record player, a phono player, and turned it into like an amp.

And so I could play it through the amp. So this drove my stepfather nuts. He just hated to hear that. What are you doing? You don't know what you're doing. You're banging on that thing. And I'd be sitting there, and I'm banging on it.

Well, it sounds good. That's better than your crummy opera. What kind of things were the Weeds playing, Stephen? British and Asian stuff? A lot of Beatles and a lot of Stones. I did a lot of Stones. We did this, the Claremont Battle of the Bands in San Diego, and my brother was, like, telling me, jump off the stage.

Jump off the stage and walk up to girls and point at them and sing. And I was scared to death. I'd never even kissed a girl. So I wound up jumping off the stage, and it was that Stone song, Everybody Needs Love. Everybody needs somebody. I need you, you, you. So I was looking at these girls who were like 11 or something.

I need you, you, you. Weird memory, but we got second place. Pretty good. Was there a cover of Lemon Tree, Trini Lopez's Lemon Tree, where you played the bongos? Yeah, that was early on when I first started getting into music. I was really into folk music at that point in my life. I was listening to the Limelighters and Kingston Trio and all that stuff.

And yeah, I knew this kid and he and I would go to the Chicken Kitchen, that's what the name was, it was down the block from my house, and we'd go to the chicken kitchen. That's what the name was. It was down the block from my house. And we'd peer in the windows, the screens, you know, and we'd be singing Lemon Tree. That's the only song we knew. Lemon Tree, very, you know, I was like, all right, you know, with the bongo thing.

Now, do you do a Trini Lopez imitation? No, no. Trini's still with us. Wow. Still hanging around. Wow. I used to like Trini. His song, that record, If I Had a Hammer. Sure.

I loved that when I was like 11 or 12. He was a big star for a time. He was. He was huge. Doing the research. Like Johnny Rivers was. Johnny Rivers. Love Johnny Rivers.

Yeah. Doing the research on you, Stephen, we found something that we talk about on this show. You were reminiscing about the days of old radio, top 40 radio. When you had variety, you could hear Sammy Davis Jr. Oh, yeah. And then you could hear the Beatles and Hendrix and Sinatra. You know, I did this concert for Clear Channel once,

and they're this big, you know, radio demographic thing. And so I played for this guy, and I said, you know, I have a good idea for a radio. And he said, oh, really? What? We're looking for something new. So I go, well, how about going back to, like, when I was 15 and I'd get a radio station,

and then they'd play Frank Sinatra followed by Jimi Hendrix followed by I Never Promised You a Rose Garden. Sure. Country. Lynn Anderson. Or you heard a little bit of every kind of style, and that's what was so great. I just miss that. We miss it terribly.

Great. I just miss that. We miss it terribly. It used to be like you'd hear strangers in the night, and then you'd hear the Stones. Yeah. And then there'd be Candyman, you know. And the DeFranco family. Oh, my God. A little bit of everything.

You've gone too far now. I know. Well, we had ABC in New York. We had Ron Lundy and harrison and all of these guys at top 40 a.m in new york and it was you know and the charts were different too i mean what they were playing was reflective of what was on the charts so you could have candy man and you could have rose garden do you remember that record it was the weirdest record was number one i don't know who did it but it was uh it went, shut up of your face.

You remember that song? Oh, yeah. It was like a number one. Shut up of your face. And all your friends would go, shut up of your face. Well, you make a point, too. You could hear novelty records in those days on the charts. That's right.

It's so different now. There's no new dances. It's like in the old days, you had the twist and you had the frug and all that stuff. And now there's like nobody invents dances anymore. You'd hear something like Convoy or Ray Stevens' The Streak or something like that. Oh, and what was it? Along with other hits. The Green Berets.

Ballad of the Green Berets. Yeah. Right. Or how about an open letter to my teenage son? Oh, yes. I'm actually dating myself. Oh, yes. letter to my teenage son oh yes dating myself oh yes you know if you want to go out and grow your hair long that's fine as long as you give me money well actors were charting then i mean you could

hear lauren green doing ringo yeah yeah right right different times and and then and you owe it to yourself if you haven't already heard it frank Frank Sinatra singing Mrs. Robinson. God, that sounds like, I wonder if I have heard that. Oh, it's the worst. Oh, it's amazing. And we love Sinatra, as you do. Oh, I do. You know, I saw Sinatra.

I went to see him on Valentine's Night or something a billion years ago, and it was towards the end of his life, and he was still doing shows, and he had his son as the conductor. Sure. What was? Frank Jr. Frank Jr. Yeah.

And so he's like singing to people, and he was sounding great, and all of a sudden he would like, he'd turn his whole body around and yell at his son on stage, and he'd go, you call that and yell at his son on stage. And he'd go, you call that an arrangement? That's so rude.

How could you do that? Anyway, my way. And then he'd come back to singing. And then he kept going back looking at his son going, really? I should have never raised you as a child, you know. Was it awful? He was saying all this shit on stage. It was at the Desert Inn. Was it schtick or was he just working him over?

No, he was mad. Wow. Why? We should have rehearsed this. Why didn't you, you know. So Frank Sinatra was like a scumbag father. Well, maybe. No, but he did pay all that money to get him back after he had been kidnapped.

Now, here's what i don't understand when frank jr got kidnapped with all the mobsters that frank was friends with why didn't he have those guys killed i don't know how to answer that can you help me out i got a better question I got a better question. I got a safer question. Was he aware of your lyric in On and On, the Sinatra reference? Actually, I used to get my hair cut at this place, and Tina Sinatra used to go there. So one time I talked to her, and she said that she had gone to Palm Springs with him one time, and she was driving him, and she asked him if he had ever heard that.

And he did. So he, he never like, you know, there was never like a brand new bicycle on my front porch or anything saying love you, Frank. You know,

I never had that. The least he could have done. Joe Dolce, by the way, I looked it up. Shut up your face. Oh, is that the artist was Joe,

Joe D O L you face. Oh, is that who it is? The artist was Joe, D-O-L-C-E. Oh, and there used to be that song, and it was taken off the air, and that was the Coming to Take Me Away Ha Ha. Oh, Napoleon. Oh, that was really a long time ago. Napoleon. That was like 65 or 66. Yeah, they decided it was like making fun of people with mental problems,

so they took it off the air. So at what point, Stephen, so the Weeds are doing battles of the bands and things of this nature. Yeah, the Weeds never became a big thing. Oh, I know. And by the way, the name, we never call ourselves the Weeds after pot. We weren't that hip. We called ourselves the Weeds after the weeds in the backyard.

Just an inanimate object. At what point did you decide to make the pilgrimage, to leave San Diego, go up to L.A., and try to make a run at this. Yeah. Was there a catalyzing moment? We'd been up to L.A. once and recorded. It was just, I wish I had that recording. And then we went again when I was like 17, about 17, 17 and a half. And I wound up taking my guitar and just walking around Hollywood,

knocking on doors and trying to get something. And I would try everything. I would try English accents. Yeah, I just got over from England. And I'm very good friends with George Harrison's nephew. And I would come up with all this crap. Anything just to get your foot in the door. It was so difficult.

Now it must be impossible. But I wound up finding this guy who worked at Dot Records. He was the head guy, Milt Rogers. He said, come on in, son. It was one of those guys. And I had my guitar with me. And he said, OK, I want to hear something commercial. And I said, what's that that i didn't know what commercial i thought he meant the commercial like on tv uh i never heard that

expression so i wound up playing him tons of songs you know and all my you know beer can on the beach songs and and benny the wharf rat and all that. And he said, good, that's good, but I don't hear a hit. And then I finally played this new song I was working on called Daisy Hawkins. And he went, he slapped his hand on the desk and he said, kid, that's a hit. And

what wound up happening is after that meeting, I wound up going up to E.H. Morris Publishing. They were a publishing company that published all these musicals like Mame, Bye Bye Birdie, Hello Dolly. And they wound up signing me because I said the right thing. Oh, this guy says it's a hit. And they said, well, great. Let's sign you.

So they signed me for $50 a week as a staff songwriter. And that's like, what year is that i guess that's uh who's that i was 70 yeah well you said you said you were turned down by every label and every producer in town just about yeah i didn't do well you're in a classic uh movie moment in animal house see we do jump around yeah no that was my twin brother no well tell us how you met landis okay i i met landis actually i met john landis uh in 19 it's amazing i remember through dates but i think it was like 1971 during it was the big la earthquake and and um my good buddy uh charlie villers was friends with him so we i wound up meeting him we wound up becoming becoming great friends i'm not really

friends with them anymore but we we we were like great great friends for years and he put me in you know kentucky fried movie i'm doing um i'm gonna take this one for a minute since i was a kid i've always made this duck hi there how you doing sometimes sometimes when i'm in the in the bath i'll make conversations how are you doing oh pretty good how are you oh not bad anyway so uh just so the audience will know he's moving his fingers around that looks like like a duck he's doing like a shadow pup. Yeah. He kind of, but it's, you know, there's this thing. Anyway, so I do that in Kentucky Fried Movie. I'm in the section that's California girls and, no.

Catholic high school girls. Catholic girls in trouble. Right. And so I do this, and I go, surfing USA, you know, which makes no sense at all. But that's what I did in the movies. And then he asked me to do Animal House. And I wrote the theme to Animal House. I incorporated all the characters in the song.

And then I was going to be on the, you know, actually I was supposed to be downstairs flirting with Karen Allen at that time. That's what they wanted me to do at first. And then they changed it and they had me sitting on the steps. And it was my idea to do that song because they wanted a song that was public domain. So I sang the song, I gave my love a cherry that had no stone i gave my love a chicken that had no bone right in my love a story that had no end i gave and then that's when he took my guitar and smashed it lucy you did did you know what he was gonna do

yeah but i i didn't know you did a great job of looking frightened well i i generally i was i was i know i now have that broken guitar i had everybody sign it in the cast and then it's hanging in my house in a frame wow i love that we will return to gilbert godfrey's amazing, colossal podcast. But first, a word from our sponsor. Hear that, Cotopounder fans? That silence is two friends enjoying the new Creamy Parmesan and Bacon Cotopounder at McDonald's. Because adding crispy bacon and creamy parmesan sauce to our 100% Canadian beef

makes it impossible to have a conversation. Try the new creamy parmesan and bacon quarter pounder today and discover how words are so unnecessary. For a limited time only at participating McDonald's restaurants in Canada. What happens when 20 extremely athletic Canadians who thrive on competition and won't settle for less than number one find themselves on a team. Taking on jaw-dropping obstacles all across Canada is one thing. Working together on a team

with some pretty big personalities is another. It's a new season of Canada's ultimate challenge and sparks are gonna fly. New episode Sundays. Watch free on cbc jam now what what do you remember about belushi that's built that's judy jacklin by the way on the staircase with you isn't it john's john's uh john's wife john's wife was right in back of me right um well i had a lot of experiences with Belushi.

He was a different guy. He was like somebody who had a lot of personality, and a lot of personalities. He could be sweet as could be, and he could also be a little nasty. And so I remember we went to some chinese restaurant once in new york and people were screaming at him on the sidewalk on the across the street saying do the b do the b remember that way back then everybody he hated that being. He was like, fuck you and the fucking B. He didn't like that.

Going back to Kentucky Fried Movie, can we give us some context? I mean, an attractive woman comes up to you and says, show me your nuts before you do that thing. What was your, was there a reaction from friends and family? Hey, I'm in a movie. No. No. Not really really nobody would see

it nobody saw it everybody was really religious on my family side i was raised a christian scientist so it's a whole different thing and you when you when you were asked to do the animal house theme was it your idea to do the falsetto to do the frankie valley oh you mean for that song dream girl well for dream girl and also the theme you're you're in oh yeah yeah well the movie set in 1962 and who was big in 1962 right good point four seasons good point sherry baby sherry you know so it was all that so it became very easy for me to go Sherry, Sherry, baby, Sherry. So it was all that. So it became very easy for me to go, let me tell you about some friends I know.

They're kind of crazy, but you dig the show. And then I incorporated all the characters in the script, because I had a script with me, in the song. So Boone and Katie playing cat and mouse you know and all that you know you're still doing that song in concert because i saw you i saw a clip of you love that song march of this year doing it oh you saw me in march no i saw a clip of you on youtube doing the doing the song back in march or april oh really doing it for doing it for an audience and i love the fact that you can still get up there. Well, thank you.

And I thought I knew everything about Animal House, Stephen, but the Carrie Fisher little tribute at the end of Dream Girl, I had never heard before. Well, I had a big crush on her back then. So I did. A little Easter egg. I did. What did I do? I go, oh, I said at the very end of Dream Girl, Be My Dream Girl.

Right, which is the song that's playing when Marmalade. Be my dream girl and make my dream come true. You know, I tried to do it like four seasons. And then at the very end, I go, Carrie baby. I said Carrie baby. Yeah, it's a nice little tribute. I miss her, too. I said, Carrie baby. Yeah, it's a nice little tribute. Gilbert. I miss her too.

I miss her. I think she, you know, we weren't, we never went bowling or anything, but, you know, she was like a friend of mine at one point in my life. And it's, she was so talented. Wow. She could do Judy Garland. You'd swear it was Judy Garland. She seems like one of those hub people, you know, that every she touched so many different people's lives.

We had Griffin Dunn in here a couple of weeks ago as a friend of hers. Beverly D'Angelo we had on the show as a friend of hers and Treat Williams, now you. She's touched a lot of our guests had long-standing friendships with her. Craig Bierko's another one.

Yeah. And she paid Gilbert a compliment. Yeah, I was doing a roast with her. Oh, yeah. Craig Bierko's another one. Yeah. And she paid Gilbert a compliment. Yeah, I was doing a roast with her, and she looks at me and smiles and goes, You are just my type. And I said, What's your type? And she goes, Little, cute, and funny. I thought you were going to say breathing. As long as we're on land, and we'll move past it, but you also turn up in the Blues Brothers as one of the –

I love how he kept giving you the same – Yeah, he kept giving you the same credit. Charming guy. Well, it was always a little bit different. I think the first, in Animal House, I was a charming guitar player. In Blues Brothers, I was a charming state trooper. Then I did Twilight Zone. I was in Twilight Zone as a soldier.

One of Nita Meyer's troops? Yeah, right. Right, Right. Right. No. Uh, and then I was in that and I was charming, uh,

charming GI. And then the last one I did was, uh, uh, wait a minute. Did I do all of them? Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Zone. Right, right. Yeah. I was, that was my line, you know. I wasn't in the script when,

I was in the police car and then it flips over when they trashed the mall and then it's turning round and round and so I go, they broke my watch. That was my line.

One other Landis project we might as well mention. You're in the Thriller video. Oh, yeah. Right, oh yeah right right well not you'd have to you know put on your bifocals or something to find me but i mean uh i was in a yellow shirt uh to the to the right of michael jackson and his date and uh you can see me though on, as long as you have a wide screen. I want to go back to the struggling years, Stephen. Oh, yeah. There's some good stuff in there.

And I was telling Gilbert that at one point, you were basically in your Volkswagen going from celebrity's house to celebrity's house auditioning. You went to Barbra Streisand's. You went to Diana Ross's house auditioning songs or playing your repertoire for them. As a songwriter, I did find a way to get in to play for a song. Now it never happened, but back then you could possibly play in person for a person, for a human being, a celebrity, a singer.

And so I did that with Melissa Manchester. She didn't record any of my songs. I did that with Diana Ross. I'm like sitting there with Diana Ross, you know, going, and she's like, I think she had a Valium or something. She seemed a little laid back, but she was going, I think she had a Valium or something. She seemed a little laid back. But she was going, that's great. She was being very nice. I must have played about 30 songs for her.

When all of a sudden, knock, knock, knock, who's at the door? Smokey Robinson, Jr. Wow. Smokey Robinson, what? And so he comes in. What a great songwriter. And so he sat there and listened to me and he says i'm going to sign you and i was like wow he was working at motown and that would be like well i think i'll

jump off a cliff if i go with motown you played at michelle phillips house too and what what was the story that baity and nicholson popped in? Oh, yeah. Right, right, right. You got all the stuff. I wound up going to, I had an assignment, right, to go and play songs for Michelle Phillips. So I didn't know that Michelle Phillips was living with Warren Beatty. And so I go there to their house on Mulholland Drive, and I got my guitar and a songbook and everything. And just as I get there, Warren Beatty and Jack Nicholson are walking up to the house to get into the house to eat something or something.

And they had played tennis on the tennis court there. And so I sat with them because she was late and she was doing her thing and she was going to come down a little while and she was also making food. And so Warren Beatty said, hey, play me a song. So I went, oh, okay. So I had just written this song of mine, Careless, which is on my first album. The first album is called Careless.

And I played it for him. And he said, you know, you don't need that one line right here. You could really take that out. Anyway, I followed his thought. You know, I wound up making the change. And I changed it. So that was pretty neat. And so funny thing, you know, she made chili, right, Michelle?

Okay. I don't know how to say this, but this was so funny at the time to me, but it doesn't really read or say, it doesn't sound that funny. But at one point I found myself in line in the kitchen for chili. It was Warren, Jack Nicholson, and me. And it was just like me. And so I'm like really nervous because they're like

mega stars and everything. So I go very, my voice is shaking and I go, uh, Jack. And he goes, yeah, you know, and Jack Nicholson, he goes, have you ever tried a poached egg in chili? It's really good.

He looks at me, total deadpan. No, never tried it. That's the extent of my conversation with him. Steven, I see the guitar behind you. And before we get too deep into the show, do you want to play something for us? Sure. Careless. I was going to tell you my Burt Bacharach story.

Oh, I love the Burt Bacharach story. You want me to wait? No. No. Whatever you want to do. Well, okay. In 1981, I had a lot of things I was doing. I was producing people.

I was doing this and doing writing this, doing that for movies and blah, blah, blah. And like number 16 on the list was write song with Burt Bacharach for the movie Arthur. They were doing a soundtrack album, and so they wanted songs. So I'm thinking like burt beckerec you know i was a major fan but i thought oh he's probably much older now and he's probably out of it so i show up at the door i'm thinking it's going to be hey it's burt beckerec how you doing sit down you know and he's like total the opposite of that. He is like incredibly handsome. He had like a tennis racket in his hand and a sweatshirt, and he'd just been playing tennis.

And he's like, Stephen, come on in. And so I came in, and I wrote this song with him and his girlfriend at the time, Carol Bayer Sager. So he plays. We were in the music room and his white grand piano was on like a pedestal it was like above so you look up at him and he gets up on there and he plays this chord that was like i don't know what an l756 something uh and it was like jing and i swear uh two white doves flew out of the piano it was like oh my god listen to this guy he was like his chords his stuff he's like amazing

so uh he's you know uh let's see well i guess i could tell this. So he's brought out a joint, and we wind up smoking a joint. And there's nothing like Burt Bacharach's stash. He's like, God, I got so blasted. I was like really blasted. And I was like really worried that like how am I going to write something? I'm so out of it. Ah, I got to get it together. So I turn on my little tape recorder, and I always do that when I'm so out of it. Ah, I got to get it together. So I go, you know, so I turn on my

little tape recorder and I always do that when I'm writing a song and a little cassette tape recorder. So it records everything. So that was going. And, uh, I say, excuse me, I have to go to the bathroom real quick. So I go to the bathroom. I look in the mirror. I go, you idiot. That's Burt Bacharach out there. Oh, my God. And, like, all these songs start going through my head. Like, you'll never get to heaven if you break my heart. The look of love. Do you know the way?

You know, all of his stuff. And I'm scared to death. And so I went out there, and we actually did write a song that was on the soundtrack. I don't know if it was in the movie, but it was called Only Love or It's Only Love or something. And it's really turned out good and very happy about that. And so I'm on my way home. So I'm playing the cassette. Only love. Excuse me. Could I use the bathroom real. So I'm playing the cassette. Only love.

Excuse me. Could I use the bathroom real quick? I hear myself say that. And all of a sudden, I'm listening to them talking. And I'm like, oh, I didn't realize I was going to tape them. So they're like talking like baby talk. And she was like going, Bert, I'm tired. I want to go to bed now. I'm tired, Bert.

And he's like, well, baby, don't worry about it, baby. You know, we'll get a little sushi or something. No problem, baby. And I'm like feeling so like a creep that I'm listening to their personal conversation. Hilarious. Do you want to play something from the new record? We see the guitar there behind you. Let me put on my... I have to wear these braces, which is just a real drag,

but I have to wear these braces because I played video games for 12, no, for 25 years. Wow. 25 years of video games goofed up my thumbs. Wow. Yeah, they did. I'm still right. We want to hear about the cheese injury later.

Oh, God, that's another thing. All right. Let's see see what should be the first song oh no uh uh what does it say jimmy oh, okay. Oh, hi. Oh, almost got me in the nose there. We're making a mic adjustment. All right, no prob. Okay, this is a song.

This is a song that Jimmy Webb wrote, and I recorded it because I love it. It's called Someone Else. Oh, it's on the new album. It's on the new album. I love it. It's called Someone Else. Oh, it's on the new album.

It's on the new album. He wrote it when he was 12. And, you know, I really relate to it because I had a girlfriend in high school named Claudia Higgins. And one day I came out of math class to surprise her in the lunch quad. And she was in the arms of Brad Bright this guy Brad Bright and and she was like oh Brad and I was like totally heartbroken and I wound up going to her locker to get information and so I knew her a combination so I opened up her locker and I see I get this nifty binder, you know,

and with a magnetic thing. And so I, I, I look on the first page, dear Brad, I think Steve's on to us. Wow. So I can't read that.

So I, so I wound up, um, just, I really relate to this song is it sounds very now they're married by the way which is uh good for them anyway um so here it is here it is let's see i haven't practiced today so i hope i don't goof up. piano plays softly It's someone else I've known it all the time Known that you're not mine

And will never be It's someone else. I saw you out last night. Holding him so tight. And it's someone else No, I really can't blame him For what's happening to me Will happen to him That's a certainty And he'll learn

There's always someone else Like I learned myself Always someone else Always someone else. Always someone else. Wow. Beautiful, Stephen. I got like a hangnail or something. What's going on over there?

He wrote that when he was 12 years old. Can you believe it? His songs are so, we just saw him just the other night in concert he was just amazing his songs are so i mean you know think of all of them macarthur park uh didn't we the highwaymen uh wichita linemen i love all i know the one art recorded yeah i tried to write with him i tried to write with jimmy webb Webb once because we've been friends for like 40 years or something. And we tried to write together because we thought, well, yeah, we should write. And we get in a room.

Then it didn't really work out too well. And then later he goes, you know, man, there's only one problem with writing with you. I said, what? He goes, you're in the room. I wasn't sure what that meant, but I guess that makes sense. I don't know. He was on this podcast, and he sang MacArthur Park with the guy sitting next to me. Oh, wow.

I will send you a clip. It's life-changing, Stephen. It's life-changing. And you're like one of our seventh guests or something that is loved in the Philippines. Yeah, we had Paul Williams here. I have a long-standing relationship with the Philippines. I mean, I went there originally in 1980 because I was researching faith healers back then. And because my brother had told me that this guy John Newcomb, the tennis player, he had hurt himself and then they healed him over there.

And I thought, you know, I always, you know, I buy anything. So I went along with it and wound up going all the way to the Philippines. And then since I was there, I went on their TV shows and different things. So they know about me for years and years and years. So I've been there. I've played there now 11 times. Last year was my 11th trip. Wow.

You're making a doc about that in part? Yeah, we're making a documentary about the trip because I had my manager film everything. And so, yeah, that and my weird career, and it's kind of a mixture of stuff. But it's really funny. There's a lot of funny stuff in it. I got to bring up a name that came up on this podcast

out of the blue. We had Rupert Holmes in here a couple of weeks ago and he's become a friend of the show. And we had callers calling up and asking us trivia. And somebody called us up and wanted to know

who was the famous drummer who appeared as one of Spinal Tap's drummers. A famous session drummer, a famous LA drummer. And the answer to the question turned out to be Russ Kunkel. Oh, I was going to say Russ Kunkel. Yeah, so there you go. So who is a guy Russ Kunkel and his wife played a?

Leah. Yeah, Leah Kunkel, who I believe is Cass Elliott's sister? Yeah. Yeah, played a role, a pivotal role in your career. Oh, very much so, yeah. And she's in town, actually. I'm going to see her this week, hopefully. She was a good pal of mine, and then she really liked my songs and stuff.

So she got my songs and then gave it to Russ, and he gave it to Art Garfunkel. and then gave it to Russ, and he gave it to Art Garfunkel. This was in like, I don't know, 75? Mm-hmm. And he gave it to him, and he wound up recording two songs on his breakaway album, and then I was like, you know, finally on my way, you know? I was like, I finally got a good thing. A turning point.

That's a beautiful song, by the way, Looking for the Right One. Yeah, he did Looking for the Right One. I like your version and I like Art's version. Yeah. So he wound up recording about eight songs of mine. Yeah, it was a time, you know. I mean, I was so excited to work with Art Garfunkel back then. I was a big S&G fan.

Sure. Oh, shit. I just spilled my Pellegrino. It was just funny that we were kicking the name Russ Kunkel around on this podcast, and I went home to do the research, to start the research on you, and bam, up came the name Russ Kunkel. So it was just a funny coincidence. Followed his career, too.

I mean, he's played with everybody. You said in an interview how important music is to just life in general. Oh, yeah. I mean, what if we didn't have music? Terrible. Oh, yeah. I mean, what if we didn't have music? Terrible. Be unlivable. You said, like, before you're born, there's your mother's heartbeat.

You said it. Yeah. I didn't say it. You must have been told that. You said before you're born. I heard my mother's heartbeat? You said it. Before I was born?

Yeah. So, I guess that I was taking a psilocybin back then or something. Your manager's calling bullshit on you. I don't remember saying that. In New York I said that? Was that the time I was on psilocybin? No way. I don't remember saying that.

I heard my mother's heartbeat in the womb. No, you didn't hear it. But you were saying basically like before someone's born, it's their mother's heartbeat. That's their life. And that's like a rhythm. That's pretty profound, Stephen. I guess so.

I guess you never fucking said it. I would claim i guess so i don't remember i guess you never fucking said i would claim that i don't remember saying it but you know tell us about writing on and on because it's a fun story how it how it came to it came together you know i don't remember saying that but i've had problems with my short-term memory my long-term memory and my short-term memory. Very good. You're perfect for, you fit right in at this show. Tell us about On and On. Well, it was just, you know, it came from a chord, you know.

I was messing around with the guitar, and I hit this chord, and I just went, oh, this chord is so cool. I better do something with this chord. So I just kept playing it, and days went by. I didn't eat or sleep, and I just hit this chord. And people from miles around would come just to hear this chord. And finally, I thought, I better do something with this chord. I'll do a little bit of this. She's in love with old Sam, take him from the fire into the frying pan. On and on, she just keeps on trying.

And she smiles, but she feels like crying. On and on, on and on, on and on When the first time is the last time It can make you feel so bad But if you know it Show it Hold on tight Don't let her say goodnight

Got the sun on my shoulders, my toes in the sand A woman's left me for some other man But I don't care, I'll just dream and stay ten Toss up my heart to see where it lands on and on i just keep on trying and i smile when i feel like dying on and on on and on on and on, on and on On and on, on and on On and on On and on, on and on, on and on.

Lovely. That sounds so great we will return to Gilbert Gottfried's amazing colossal podcast after this yeah it was at the time I was uh you know trying to make it and you know the whole thing and uh and that's when I wrote it I was my landlady had all these exotic flowers and so i just wanted to be somewhere other than silver lake and so i said uh you know down in jamaica you know hence the the burrito marley going you what do you know about jamaican women didn't it have a different lyric in that spot? Wasn't it something about feed your

mangoes? Oh, that was on the rough. You must have looked at the rough draft. I did. I looked at your book. Oh, yeah, yeah. It had feed you mangoes and all these terrible lines. It had like, you know, find

a lover in the five and ten cent store and you know terrible lines you know well i want to recommend that book which people can find online which i yeah it's hard to find yeah but it's it's it's on if you go to amazon you can find it i mean there's some great stories you you had injured yourself this is a whole other show but you injured yourself. This is a whole other show, but you injured yourself carrying a plate of brie. No, it was bigger than that. Was it a tray? Huge. A big tray of cheese.

A huge thing of cheese. And you couldn't play, so you decided to write this book. Was that it? That's true. I was on Vicodin for about three months, and I was just really – I don't know if there's a different Vicodin now, but it was like the Vicodin back then, I was like flying, you know. And I was calling everybody. And I talked to, I still have the rough drafts, actually, of a lot of them. I have the Stayin' Alive, Stayin' Alive by the Bee Gees.

I have a boarding pass that they wrote, you know, Robin Bee Gee wrote the, you know, lines from the song on it and stuff. And I've got Monster Mash, the rough of Monster Mash. The Doc Pamas story is very sweet. Oh, the Doc P he wrote he wrote their lyrics for save the last dance on on his on his wedding invitation yeah yeah very sweet story yeah it's a great book i mean people have seen it love it did you write a letter to dylan trying to get your hands on some original i did what happened what was the result of that? It was weird to write a letter to him because I was like, dear Bob.

You know, it's like, comma. You know, yeah, I wrote to him. I wrote to Pete Seeger. I wrote to everybody back then. And, you know, I actually met Bob Dylan once. I met just about everybody. I never met Bob Dylan once. I met just about everybody. I never met you, Gilbert. But I met a lot of people, and I was at this party for my chiropractor back then.

One of his patients was Bob Dylan. And so this must be about like 30 years ago or something. And so I went to this party and there's Bob Dylan. And you're like, wow, Bob Dylan, you know. And I walk over to him, you know. I swear to God this is true. I say, oh, it's so great to meet you. Hi, great to meet you.

My name's Stephen Bishop. He goes, Stephen Bishop? Oh. No, I shouldn't do all those sound effects you know like I saw him in concert every song was like oh taxi so he goes um wow you're famous he says wow you're famous to me I'm like huh I'm famous you're like really famous wow, you're famous to me. I'm like, huh? I'm famous? You're like really famous? Wow. Do you know that old story about his singing? Because I mentioned it in my book.

And I had called everybody. And one of the people that I called, I talked to this girl who was the daughter of Woody Guthrie. Her name is Sharon Guthrie or something like that. Anyway, and that was his big, he loved him so much, you know, and he fashioned all his songwriting from him. And she told me that during the final stages of his life, Woody Guthrie's life, he had Huntington's disease. And Bob used to always, he was so enamored with him.

He'd come there and sit at his feet, and he just loved him so much. So this is a fascinating thing. He was singing like this, you know, this land is your land. And Bob Dylan copied that style of sounding like you're sick. And his wife, when she used to hear Bob Dylan sing, she used to get very upset because it reminded her of her sick husband. You know, because he'd go well you know and that's how uh woody guthrie guthrie was sounding so can you imagine he influenced like a whole the birds

tom petty everybody you know well i don't know you know i mean it's an amazing story really but it's true that the woody guthrie too, in the book of how he wrote the, uh, this land is your land as an angry response to Irving Berlin's God bless America was also, was also fascinating. We have to tell our fans to get the book songs, songs in the rough. There's a good story too,

about, uh, Al Cooper hating Gary Lewis's version of this diamond ring. Oh yeah. Tell us about Harry Nielsen. Another guy you knew. Oh, he comes up a lot this diamond ring. Oh, yeah. Tell us about Harry Nielsen, another guy you knew. He comes up a lot on this show. Well, Harry Nielsen was a good friend of mine.

He was really good friends with Jimmy Webb. They were really great friends. But I became friends with him in the last, you know, four or five years of his life. I gosh, I wonder what I should tell. uh gosh i wonder what i should tell i was actually at the uh you know i i met three of the beatles but but i never met john lennon but i did see him the night that they were has uh hassling the smothers brothers that's a famous night yeah yeah i was there because i wound up i was in the the bar, and then I said, could I use the bathroom?

And that was an old trick to go through the troubadour, like you're using the bathroom, then you hide yourself away and watch the show for free. So I did see him. I mean, I was such a John Lennon fan, still am, had a you know i mean i was such a john lennon fan uh still am but um i didn't know the whole thing you know why they were arguing or anything where was i going with this oh harry nielsen story oh harry nielsen and he was with john lennon that night yeah and they got in a fight and it was awful. I knew Harry Nielsen. I was at a party.

And no, don't tell that story. So we'll talk about it later in the car. Perfect segue. What was this? I remember hearing that story. What was the story with the Beatles and the Smothers Brothers? It was just Harry and John. No, it was Harry and John Lennon. Heckling the Smothers Brothers.

They were drunk, and they were hassling the Smothers Brothers. And I could tell it was the Smothers Brothers. Then I looked, and I saw John Lennon's face. He had a big face. Yeah, that's a famous night. And what's the Gary Lewis one? Well, I don't know anything about that I never met Gary

Well, it's in your book Yeah Well, people will have to get the book I'll give you my copy of the book, Gil Okay, here's what you were waiting for I know, here it is, here it is Chestnuts roasting On an open fire.

Steven, will you sing something? Everybody knows a turkey and another turkey. Make two turkeys. Gilbert wants to know if you'll be brave enough to sing something with him. Sure. Okay. It might be you. But do you have what parts he'll sing?

He didn't write that one. Do you want to sing It Might Be You with him? Yes. Sure. I mean, are you going to sing like good? Or like strange? You haven't heard this show. Yeah, you've never heard me before.

He sang with Tommy James, Ron Dante, Jimmy Webb. Who else? Oh, Tony Orlando. Tony Orlando. Dick Van Dyke. Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, Dick Van Dyke was a very known singer. Yeah.

Not. Mike Dyke was a very known singer. Yeah. Not. Well, he'll do a little bit of, why don't you take it to all of my life, and then Gilbert will do the middle section. Do you want to do it on your own or with me? Because we're on Skype, we'll have to do each section separately. Yeah, because we block each other out.

Or you'll block each other out audio-wise. Time. I've been passing time watching trains go by all of my life lying on the sand watching seabirds fly Wishing there would be Someone waiting home for me Something's telling me it might be you It's telling me it might be you All of my life

Looking back on lovers go walking past Perfect. All of my life Wondering how they met and what makes it last if I found a place

would I recognize the face something's telling me it might be you all of my life You could do this part, Stephen. It might be you. The less of him is better.

There's so many quiet walks to take. So many dreams to wake. And with so much love to make. It's getting lonely here. And it's telling me it might be you all of my life. I've been saving love songs and lullabies. Been waiting for all of my life.

Maybe it's you. It's you. It's you. I've been waiting for all of my life. I love it. A little throwback to the Bish album. Yeah, really. Which Vicodin is necessary for that, Stephen? You're a brave man.

No, no. Yeah. Me take drugs there was a one time in my life where i didn't smoke marijuana i was marijuana we're gonna plug the new album again when can we expect the book and the documentary uh the book should come out hopefully the end of this year Or beginning of next year And the album's coming out tomorrow I love Like Mother Like Daughter Oh, Like Mother Like Daughter?

Great track She was three years old when the postcard came With just a lipstick kiss and her mama's name Guess mama had to get away from the old humdrum Like mother, like daughter, like father, like son Nice. The whole album's terrific. Thank you. And it's got the Jimmy Webbmy webb cover that you played

uh it's a little bit of everything i tried to you know because i'm a student of the beatles uh you know they always had like so much variety in their albums you know they had fast songs slow songs interesting songs you know and i wanted to go that route i wanted to have you know i didn't want to have an album so many albums you get now you know that you wanted to go that route i wanted to have you know i didn't want to have an album so many albums you get now you know that you play the song and then the next song sounds kind of the same and the next song sounds the same i didn't want to do that well i want to plug this one we'll talk about it later in the car we got the title right i also for personal reasons i love the bish album and careless i think our listeners should get your first two records.

Oh, you didn't like Red Cab to Manhattan? I like Red Cab to Manhattan too. I like Sex Kittens Go to College now that you asked. Sex Kittens Go to College. Are you a Mamie Van Doren fan? Where did that lyric come from? Sex kittens go to college.

Sex kittens go to college. Sex kittens go to college. Sex kittens go to college. I wonder what they're studying tonight. Did you want to ask Stephen if he met Orson Welles on the Henry Jekyll movie? Yes.

You know, I was telling my manager, I should have a special part in my book for all the people I've met and shook hands with. You should. Who weren't looking at me. Who weren't looking at me as they shook my hand. I shook Orson Welles, the great Orson Welles. He was looking off the side.

Yeah, how you doing? Shake. I met Robert Redford at the Academy thing, and he was like, yeah, looking off to the side and shaking my hand. That's a book. Yeah, yeah. There should be a big list, I think. You'll be jealous of Gilbert because I know you're a big Steely Dan fan. And last night, Gilbert was with Donald Fagan.

And in fact, you stole something from him. Yes. You stole something from him Yes, I went back to Donald Fagan's hotel room And I stole like A sewing kit Toothbrushing kit Shampoo Just last night

Yeah That's hilarious I felt very proud of myself Yes, get Red Cab to Manhattan I love the Little Italy song Which is not on that album, but I love that song. Oh, Little Italy. Little Italy.

That kills me to play with my thumbs. Oh, I don't mind. I wouldn't make you play it. But the Bish album is great. You got the whistling Bishettes on there. Bish's Hideaway. Carrie's in the first row. Yes, Carrie.

I think Cameron Crowe was doing some backup vocals on that record. Cameron Crowe. No, he wasn't doing background vocals. He was just there. What was he doing? Oh, he was whistling. You made him a bichette. See, I had everybody whistle the Onward Christian Soldiers.

Onward Christian Soldiers. Because I used to hear that when I was in church when I was a kid. And it was like. So I had all these people whistling the whistling bichettes yeah the whistling and get the book you guys can find it you know we do a lot of music history on this show we do episodes where we just talk about song history and your your book is perfect for that songs in the rough did i mention the name of the book i just did no my book oh your book what is your book called on and off love it and and you're one of the few people who remembers my season of saturday night live well i remember you know i think, let me just check to see who was on it. My memory serves.

I've always been a big fan of SNL, even when they went down. They weren't as funny. I was loyal. I stuck with them. It's kind of like, I remember that happened with Perrier once. You know, they said, you know, about 30 years ago, I was such a Perrier fan. And they said, oh, there's something in the cap, and it's going to give you cancer. I was like, I'll drink it anyway.

So I remember, you know, Elaine, you know, was on that show, your show, wasn't she? Julia Louis-Dreyfus? No, she was the season right after. Oh, she was? Yeah. So did you, what was that woman's name? Instead of the tip of my tongue. She was friends with Woody Allen.

She produced it. Oh, that was Jean Dumanian. She was the producer. But who actually, I mean, he left, right? Lorne Michaels. Yes, yes. So, wasn't she doing the show, really? Oh, well, she was the producer.

Yeah, she picked you, Gil, right? Yeah. Yeah. Well, who was directing? Like that guy, Paul? Dave. Dave Wilson. Dave Wilson.

Yeah, Dave Wilson. Dave Wilson, right. Yeah. Gilbert's cast was Joe Piscopo. Oh, right. Ann Risley. Let me see if I can do it. Oh, you didn't have that weird guy who did Nancy Reagan.

No, Terry Sweeney was later. That came, yeah. He was a writer on my season. Right. That was rough. You had Gail Mathias. Yeah. Piscopo.

Yes. You. Ann Risley. Who am I leaving out? Ann Risley. Yeah. Ann Risley. Donna.

Denny Dillon. Denny Dillon. And Charlie Rocket. Gail Mathias. Oh, Denny Dillon. Charlie Rocket. That's it. Oh, and Eddie Murphy. And Eddie Murphy. Gail Mathias. Denny Dillon. Charlie Rocket. That's it. Oh, and Eddie Murphy.

And Eddie Murphy. Oh, Eddie Murphy. Right, forgot him. And Joe Piscopo. So that's like 81, 82? From 80 to 81. Oh, 80 to 81. He's still very proud of it.

Yeah. He did a really good Frank Sinatra, Joe Piscopo. He did that. It was, that was an embarrassing, I'm so glad they don't show reruns of my season. Was it, did you guys have good writers? I mean, where did it, was it the cast? I don't know. It just, I remembered it sucked all the way around.

Steven, thanks for schlepping. Thanks for doing this. Are you going to be playing in New York anytime soon? No. Okay. Oh, wait, wait. I didn't think about that. Next year, yeah.

Next year. Okay. We want to thank everybody. We want to thank the people on your team, the team at Jensen and Ryan Romanesco, for making this possible. And my manager, Liz Kamlet. And my manager, Liz Camlet. And your manager, Liz. Yep.

And this was a blast. You're a sport to sing with Gilbert. Next time we'll talk about Andrew Gold. I had the weirdest thought. I thought, you know, you probably, you don't need a can of Raid or anything in your kitchen. You could just, like, talk at the insects and they'd die. I shouldn't even have mentioned that.

He's going to sign off. It's like, could you do an imitation? The insects would be gone. Could you do an imitation of me talking to the insects? Hey, you crummy insects. No. No, I don't. It gives me a sore throat.

Like, I can do Tom Waits, but I always get a sore throat afterward. Sign off. The man's got to go home. Okay. This is Gilbert Gottfried. This has been Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast with my co-host, Frank Santopadre. And we've been talking to the man who may or may not have said

that when you're in your mother's womb, you hear her heartbeat. We don't know if he said it or didn't say it. If anyone knows, if you were in a room and he said it, please tell us, Stephen Bishop. Stephen, thanks for putting up with us. All right, I had fun. Drive carelessly.

Thank you. Well, she's kind and pretty, drives a big car too. And when I hold her in my arms, I never know what to do. Thank you. Can't live but I know I should Everybody says I'm watchin' boy She'll break your heart like it was a toy You better See to the four-way day You better See to the four-way day Well, I'd leave in a minute if I only could

But when she touches me, it makes me feel so good With my heart in her hand, this is sure a mess There's no way I say no when she says yes, yes, yes Take me, shake me, and tell me this ain't a dream. Everybody says I'm watching, boy. She'll break your heart like it was a toy. You better save it for a rainy day. You better save it

for a rainy day save it for a rainy day You better Save it for a rainy day You better Save it Save it for a rainy day You better save it, save it for a rainy day You better save it, save it for a rainy day

You better save it, save it for a rainy day Save it, save it for a rainy day Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Saving for a rainy day Saving for a rainy day