Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - GGACP Rewind: Episode 45: Steve Buscemi

Episode Date: June 18, 2026

Brooklyn-born actor and director Steve Buscemi (pronounced “BOO-SEMI”) joins Gilbert and Frank for lunch and laughs at the New York Friars Club and tells us all about his early days as a struggling stand-up, his recollections of filming modern-day classics like “Reservoir Dogs,” “Miller’s Crossing” and “Fargo” and his memorable on-screen deaths at the hands of everyone from to Vince Vaughn to Roger Daltrey. Also, Steve shares a cab with Gilbert, shares the stage with Andy Kaufman and shares his appreciation for Harvey Keitel and yes...“The Brady Bunch.” PLUS: “Joey Pants”! The madness of Lawrence Tierney! Illya Kuryakin ties the knot! Paul Winchell builds an artificial heart! And Woody Allen meets Carrot Top! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Am I repeating myself? Hi, I'm Gilbert Gottfried, and this is Gilbert Gottfried's amazing colossal podcast. I'm here with my co-host, Frank Santopatra. Our guest this week is one of the busiest and most admired actors of his generation with credits. Too numerous to mention, but here goes. His movies include Reservoir Dogs, Carnet, Fargo, Armageddon, Ghost World, The Big Lobowski, and Monsters, Inc. He's appeared in dozens of television shows, including Homicide, The Simpsons. Saturday and Night Live, The Sopranos, and of course, Boardwalk Empire.

He's also a director with credits on everything from The Sopranos to 30 Rock to Nurse Jackie. I could go on and on, but it's only an hour show, and I don't have the energy. Welcome to the show, former stand-up comedian and Brooklyn's own Steve Busemi. Now, is it, is it, how do you pronounce? You said it the way I say it. Yeah. That's really all I wanted to know. That's it.

Okay. Thank you. Thanks for coming. We've been talking to Steve Busemi. This has been really fun, guys. Thank you. Guys are great. I'm back against you.

All right. Didn't you say people started calling you Bushemi, so you started saying it after a while? Well, Bushemi is not wrong. Right. You know. But shouldn't it be Bussemi? Why do you say that? Because Italian?

No, I think it's, no. Really? In Sicily, it's Bouchemi. Bouchemi? Yeah, Bouchemi. So I'm way the hell off. You are. Okay.

I always said Bichemi. You always said Bouchemi. Yeah. Yeah. That's okay. I don't correct people when they say Bouchemi. Yeah. Yeah.

Maybe I should. That's really. That's all I want to talk about. Now, Steve. Yes. How do you say that? Yes. You have to elongate the E.

little bit more. That's a Steve, if you would. Now, let's talk about something more important. All right. Then your name. Let's talk about me for a second. Sure. You used to work out at the improv.

I don't know if you'd call it workout. I somehow passed the audition at the improv. I think it was like 1978. and I used to just sit in the back of the room and I would watch all of you guys. I would see Jerry Seinfeld and Paul Reiser. Larry David, when I auditioned, Larry David was the MC. And Fred Stoller. Oh, sure.

Yeah. But I used to watch Gilbert every, I wish to watch you every night. You would come on around midnight or so. and talk about clearing a room sometimes. I'll bet. Well, here's the thing that I loved about you. You always, like, you were so far out there, and the audience either got it, and then the whole room was electrified,

or people just didn't know what they were seeing, and then you would go deeper into, you know, like the really weird, weird stuff, and then people would just politely, like, you know, sort of get up and make believe they were going to the bathroom, but they would never come back. But then all the other comics would be in the back and everybody would, you know, we'd just be dying. You know, you were just, you were incredible. And you saw me a couple of times when I worked out with... Well, Robin Williams came in one night and he got up on stage with you and you guys did like a half an hour.

It was amazing. Yeah. Did he come in often because that's the only time I... Yeah, yeah. He used to come in a lot. Really? All those clubs, like he and Rodney Dangerfield. Right.

You passed the audition not with Bud Friedman, but with his wife, but with Silver. Is that right? Silver, yeah, but I don't, you know who passed me? Maybe he didn't even have the authority to pass me. Was this comic Mark Schiff, I think his name was? Yeah. I don't think he had the authority to pass you. He told me I was in.

I remember Mark Schiff. Well, this is good. So you never passed this other name. It was like the one night they left him in charge. And I got in. I remember Keenan used to work. He worked the door. Keenan Ivory Waynes.

Yeah. He worked the door. Yeah. And Chris Albrecht was like, like, the manager. Oh, yeah. When Bud was first leaving for L.A. See, I never met Bud. So this was, so, yeah.

So, Keenan took over? Well, Keenan, no, Keenan just, like, worked the door. No, no, no. Kenan worked the door, but Chris Albrein's at the door. It's like, we had the black guy at the door. Yeah, that's basically. Well, Albrecht had an act with Bob Zamuda. Oh, yes.

He did? Albrecht and Zamuda, comedy from A to Z. Oh, I didn't know. But Chris, basically talked Chris into taking over managing the club, and that was the end of the act. Because he was in charge of, like, who would go on, right? like what the order would be. And I used to sit in the back. He'd never picked me.

I don't think he ever saw me. So he just was confused, but like, why is this kid here? You know, I would just, I would eat. I remember, like, they would feed you there. And so I used to just get a hamburger, like, every night. And I'd sit. And then at around 2 o'clock in the morning, he would kind of peruse the back room to see, like, who was there. And, you know, Carol Siskin, all right, you're up next.

Or, you know, somebody. and he'd always look at me and then look the other way. And then one night, it was only like one o'clock in the morning. And so there was still an audience. And he came and everybody had gone up. And there was nobody left to go up except me. Like he was forced. He looked at me and he went, all right, you're next.

But I could tell he was a little pissed off. He was thoughtful about it. And I was so excited. I was going to get up there. Right before I was about to go on, Paul Ryan. or walks through the door and Chris said oh thank God you're here Paul you're next and so I was I did go on but Paul went up and he he did like 45 minutes and he killed and after that I was just like it was late and then I'm sure our listeners would be curious to hear some of what you actually did in your act I would be curious yeah but uh you don't have to tell them we could we could I had you know this is why I gave up doing stand-up because No, because I get, it was hard to really figure out what was my thing. So I would just kind of pull from everybody.

You know, I did, I mean, a lot of it was self-deprecating humor and sort of the style of like Woody Allen or Rodney Dangerfield. But then I did work with props a little bit. and I had a thing where I said I was I'm trying to work out and I've been pumping iron and then I would pull out like an actual iron. So a little carrot top. Yeah, a little bit. Yeah. But it was, I don't know, it was, it's probably a good thing that I stopped. I think it worked out.

So it's a comfortable blend of carrot top in Woody Allen. Everyone's been looking for. I remember being at the improv and when, when, when. And I was, like, still trying to get on. And the MC would come out, and it would be like, you know, it would be empty. They'd be like, no one else. I'd be sitting there. And he'd be looking around going, nobody here.

You got a full audience. There's nobody to go on. Wow. Was it Samud or somebody or Zwebello told us they would put you up to get people to get out? Oh, yes. At the end. After the check spot, people would linger? They would either put on me or Larry David.

Really? Me, because the audience had no idea what the hell I was talking about, and they'd leave or Larry David because he'd get into a fight. Right. Now, did you know Gilbert then? Did you see this? Well, we didn't know each other, but I saw him for the first time at the comic strip and probably in the 80s.

Yeah. Yeah. Doing the Norman Fell bits and the Ted Bessel jokes. Some that he's still doing. So I still, but I still remember, you know, like, you're getting up there and you had a cigarette, you know. Oh my God! And you would, like, take these little drags on the cigarette, like these angry drags. And then you'd say, I just got back from Africa.

Oh, yes. I was in Biafra. And these kids, these kids, I love them. I said, I want to take you kids home with me. But how can I take you home with me? You look like hell. Starvation is no reason to let you. your looks go to hell. I skip lunch today. You don't see me looking like shit. I was like,

oh my God, who is this guy? Oh, God. I walked by the Veterans Hospital. I saw a guy in a wheelchair. I said, I know how you feel. My car wouldn't start this morning. That's incredible. I was like, wow. I couldn't believe like what you were doing. It stuck with you. Unbelievable. But the first time I saw you there was before I had. I, actually passed the auditions because we used to go there. You know, my friends, when I lived in Long Island, and we used to come in and go there, and I remember seeing you, and you used a lot of, used props.

I mean, remember you just like... Still do. Yeah, but you picked up the trays. Yeah. You used them as, like, you were Mickey Mouse, and then you did something else. And I think it was that night. This could have been the same night,

but you would have left because it was like, it was at the end of the night, and we were the last table. there and and um and i looked behind me and and and and and and i looked behind me and and and and he was like came in and he was at the door and he's looking around and uh and the waitress said are you are you going to go up he says nah you know there's nobody here and i was like well we're here and i went up to him and i asked him to go on i said would you please go i said we love you and he got up there and he performed just for me and my friends and he he did

old mcdonald had a farm and he brought us up on stage and he led us great He assigned us, you know, you're the chicken and you'll be the cow and we sang it. And you had a comedy duo? You were part of a comedy duo with an actor named Mark Boone Jr.? Yes, so later on, after I stopped doing stand-up, then I, well, I did do a little bit of stand-up. I was living in the East Village. Were you not living in the East Village then? Yes, yeah, yeah.

I used to live on Avenue A. Yeah, me too. I lived on Avenue A between 9th and 10th, and there was a comedian named Rockets Red Glare. I don't know if you know him. No. He didn't do the uptown clubs, but he would do these clubs in the East Village, like Club 57 and places like that. And so I started to do some stand-up in his shows, and then I met this actor, Mark Boone, Jr. And then we started to write and perform our own work.

He plays the character of Bobby Munson on Sons of Annen. He's in a million things. He was Batman Begins. He's one of those. Oh, that guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. And so I felt more comfortable having a partner. I think, you know, part of the reason that I left stand-up, I just felt like it was, it was lonely. It was, you. And I remember at the improv, it was hard to, like, it was so clickish, you know. Like, all of these guys used to, like, after they would go to, like, Steve. Remember Steve?

Middleman, yeah. Middleman. I think they would go to his apartment and play poker. And I just, I couldn't figure out how to, like, get in the click. We actually shared a cab ride home once, Gilbert. Now, every single person right now is saying, okay, I guess Steve paid for this. You didn't split a cab. You shared a cab.

We shared a cab. But here's the thing. Remember, they used to give you. five bucks for cab fare? Oh, yes. Yeah. Yeah. I don't think I had, I don't think I went on that night, so you had the five bucks, but I think you still asked me for $250.

And this was like the most awkward cabri item. Because Gilbert, you know, just sat there. Not even like, so has your stack going? Where are you from? Nothing. Nothing. You know, I just sat there and I would try and ask you questions. Hey, Gilbert, did you see that TV movie about the Beatles?

And then you would say something. You know, you'd give me like a one line saying, that was it. That was it. You made him pay for the cab, even though you got paid and he didn't get paid. Classy. You know, when you said that thing about Riser coming in and Riser went on ahead of you, it reminded me of that story I was telling for a while like

because he was so one time I was supposed to go on and Robin Williams walked in and they said okay you're on next and Robin said I've got some people in the audience and I'd like them to see Gilbert first that's nice yeah he was the sweetest guy he was just I just loved him wow that's cool

okay and how do you say your name again All right Bush Bush Blasemick Yes Somebody finally got it right That was farther off than I was

So obviously the stand-up Did not work out Didn't work out But it's never It hasn't completely left me Because sometimes when I'm asked to You know like host an evening Or something or

You just did Roberts Michaels show Yeah And so Yeah And so I I love comedy like when I was growing up you know

these were the guy like George Carlin and Steve Martin and Randy Dangerfield and all these I used to love seeing them and I don't know that I really wanted to be a stand-up but when I was trying to like break into this business

I knew that the clubs were there and if you could just pass the audition and write your own material then you had a built-in audience and I knew that comedians often made the leap into getting a sitcom or movies. Back then it was really sitcoms was the thing. That was my dream, was to try and...

Be like Abe Kapler or Freddie Prins? Yeah. Yeah. Now, Freddy Prins, he kind of... I remember seeing him on the Johnny Carson show. I think the first time he was on, and I remember Johnny Carson saying that he was 17 years old. And that was part of the problem, you know, for me doing stand-up, but then,

I was only like 20. Like, what the hell life experience did I have to draw from? I can't believe it. Yeah, and my material hasn't advanced. What year did you start working out at the improv then? Oh, God. Let's see. I guess when I started, it was like the end of the 60s.

Really? Yeah. Wow. You're old. Dara's yelling 1970. Was it 1970? And you just do impressions, right? I mean, you didn't really have an act.

Yeah, that was it. I still don't have a man. I still have no reason to be in the business. Now, yeah, you said that, you know, I was also on the same night, a night of too many stars with you. And you did a bit there. That's really true. What do they call you?

The, you know, because they, someone who's almost getting. The most mergible man. Yeah, the most murd. murderable man. You've been killed by everybody. So we have a list of people who have killed you. Yeah, just this is a short list of people who've killed you on screen. Harvey Keitel, Vince Vaughn, Christopher Lloyd, Danny Treo, Treat Williams. This is a small list. James Gandalfini and our personal favorite, Roger Daltrey.

Oh, that's right. Yes. Tales from the crypt. Yeah. Well, you also died in other ways, falling through glass coffee table and having the heart attack and the Lubowski. after, yes, I know, Lobowski, that really surprised me that I die of our heart. It was sad. They just wanted to kill me. Now, I remember

after I was killed on the Sopranos, I thought, you know what, I think this is it. I'm not going to take any roles where I'm killed again because I was just killed by Tony Soprano. That should be my final death. Then about a year later,

I was offered the Michael Bay film, The Island, killer. You don't even know the guy's name. That's where I fall through the glass. There's a montage of you being killed on YouTube. Yeah. It's lovely. But going back, Steve. All right. It is Steve?

Steve. Please, just along a I read after the you did the stand-up, you did the comedy duo thing, you didn't have an agent. You started going on auditions. You started, what, getting backstage and the trades and just going on open casting calls? Yeah, I didn't know how to do it. I didn't know how to get an agent, but I, you know, would just look in the, in backstage and just send my, you know, my picture and my padded resume.

Make up shit. Drives a ship. Drives a stick. Yes. Special skills. Right. And a guy named Kevin Downs. He was at NYU and he cast me in his film.

Now I don't remember the name of it. I think it was Surf City. I played a kid from Ohio who was living in New York but was trying to get to a beach so I could surf. And the whole movie I walk around with a surfboard. That was really like my first experience on film. And I was actually, this is when I was on the fire department because I joined the fire department in 1980.

I gave up, stand up to do something less scary. Right, right. And it was a lot of way. while I was on the fire department that I started to do some film, student films, and then films that were being made in the East Village at that time. This guy, Eric Mitchell, made a feature called The Way It Is, and I was in it, and Boone was in it, and Rockets. I think the first time I saw you was in a movie called Parting Glances. Well, that was the first one that was ever released. Oh, I see. Okay. That's the reason that's the first time I saw you.

I had made two independent films before that one, but that was the first one that was the first one that was released and that was the one that really got me some attention and I was able to get an agent and then from there it snowballed and then you know like guys like jim jarmish and tom de chillo who i made a lot of films with tom did with they would be around then you know and uh they used to see the theater that that i did then so it was it was really because of you know those early films that i got really wasn't because of an agent it was because of who was coming to the shows at that time, you know, when I was performing. Now, after September 11th, I think you went back, you went to help out?

I went, well, I was with Engine Company 55. They lost five guys. And so I went down to the firehouse just to see if they needed any help. And I was brought into the site, and I ended up working with them for about five days. Yeah. And it was, you know, I mean, and I hadn't been. in touch with them for a while before that. So it, you know, I mean, I always say this. I hate the reason that I was reconnected with my old company, but I'm so happy that I did because I realized how much

I missed it. And now I, you know, I'm connected with them and I go to the parties and the fundraisers. And you made a documentary. You made an HBO documentary. I did. We made it with Liz Garbus, what was the director. And it's called A Good Job Stories of the FDNY. And didn't this originate with your dad telling you to Take the civil service test? My dad. Yeah, my dad was on the sanitation department, and whatever civil service test came up when me and my brothers were 18, we had to take. And for me, it was the fire department.

Just to have something to fall back on in case? Oh, yeah. He was like, this acting thing, fine, but, you know, but you need a real job. Yeah. So that's what I did. And so then, parting glances, it's funny because I'm doing research online, and I read that Reservoir Dogs was referred to. as your breakout role, but I'm looking, you did 24 films before reservoir dogs.

Yeah, and parting glasses was done by a guy named Bill Sherwood. It was his only film. Yeah. He died of AIDS. And, yeah, so, but after that, I did Mystery Train, the Jim. Jarmish. Jarmish film. And, yeah, like a few things.

But Reservoir Dogs was the one where that great opening credit sequence where, you know, Quentin put our name. like right on the screen like in front of our face. So that was, that was huge. A game changer. It was. Yeah. And reservoir dogs is where you have that great scene of why you don't tip.

Yes. Which has followed you around, hasn't it? It has. Now I have to overtip. I'm still short-changing them because, but yeah, that was, you know, that really was an incredible role. and just to be in the same room with all those guys and to be with Harvey Kytel who was, you know, he was an idol.

I just saw him last week. I was doing Adam Sandler's new film, a Western, The Ridiculous Six, and Harvey is in that, and just love him. And he's really the reason that I got into the film because they were only doing auditions on the West Coast. They couldn't afford to come to New York, and Harvey paid for Quentin and Lawrence Bender to come to New York.

And he got in all these New York actors. And, I mean, I didn't know him. But because they came to New York, I was able to get in on those auditions. And somehow I made it into the film. An actor that Gilbert and I like in that movie is Lawrence Tierney, who had a fascinating career as a tough guy on screen on off. What was he like? Unfortunately, I mean, he was a little bit loopy.

He got very distracted. Like when we were doing the scene where he's handing out the colors and he's telling us, you know, like what we're going to do. He had a hard time memorizing his lines and he could only do it like line by line. And you had to sit there off camera straight as a board because if you scratched your nose, you go, what are you doing? I'm trying to. I'm trying to. He's, oh. I'm sorry.

My nose, you know. And everybody got upset with him. One by one, the actress, like, got up and started to leave. Really? Yeah. But I stuck it out. It was, like, me, Quentin, Chris Penn, and Eddie Bunker were the only ones left at the end. But we had to sit, like, perfectly still.

But he really pissed off everybody. And after the third day, Quentin fired him. Interesting. He was so mad. He fired him. Didn't know that. And Harvey said, you can't fire him. We just shot him.

for three days. Right. Right. But he was, yeah, he was, he's good in the film. He was a handful.

He's the fact that you get that performance out of him. He's amazing in the film. Yeah. In spite of that. Oh, yeah. Yeah. We will return to Gilbert Gottfried's amazing colossal podcast, but first a word from our sponsor.

Do you know what I remember? This goes back to the September 11th. Okay. Yes. After September 11th. For some reason, I don't know, I would stop by firehouses and say hi to the fireman. And I remember at one firehouse I visited, the fireman said, yeah, people have been sending us like stuff like socks. I don't know, we don't need any socks, but they keep sending us socks.

And I said, oh, I could use some. Why did I know where that was going? So I left with a big bag of socks. Because of September. Yes, well. That's another positive from September. Do you still have the socks? He's wearing them.

No, I sold them. So for, it's Steve. Okay. So for a New York actor. So you're Italian? Only on my father's side. What's on your mother's side? My mom is

She's got Irish, English, I think some Dutch. It's a real mix. We've had a lot of guineas on the show. We had Danny Iello. Yeah. Yes. Who else?

Frankie Avalon. Frankie Avalon. Bobby Rydell. Wow. That's three. I wouldn't say that's a lot. Oh, for me. And your co-host.

But I was surprised that Mickey Dolan's. said his dad was off the boat. That is correct. Oh, wow. Yeah. Yeah. And his mom was an actress. His mom was in B-movies. Yeah.

You've actually listened to a previous episode of the Gilbert Gottfried podcast. I'm impressed, Steve. That's a first. So how did Reservoir Dogs change everything? I mean, you didn't have to audition as quite as much. You kind of went from being working stiff actor to star. No, no, no. I mean, it just got me in the door to, I still had to audition, but it just, it's so much easier when people can connect your face and the name or if they've seen you in something, because I'm terrible at auditioning.

I'm awful. But after that, even if I gave a bad audition, they would at least go, well, he was good in that movie, so maybe, you know. Right. Yeah, auditioning is so hard. are you any better at it now than when you started no and thankfully i i haven't had to do it in years but um i i never knew if i should prepare sometimes i would prepare and get in there and do okay but other times i would be awful like i remember i auditioned for uh it was the barry levinson film the one where about the uh the guys who do aluminum side tin men tin men yeah so i prepared

this thing and i went in and i did it And he went, that was good, good. Now let's try it like this. And he gave me like a little bit of direction. I went, all right. And I did it the exact same way that I said. He looked at me and I looked at him. And I went, that wasn't any different, right?

He goes, no, that's okay. Were you reading for Dreyfus's part or Danny DeVito's part? No, no. I think, you know who actually got the part that I did, I think, was Seymour Cassell. Oh, your friend. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I later became friends with him. Yeah. Did a lot of films with, yeah. You would have been good in 10 men. Thanks. And one of your most memorable deaths was, of course, in Fargo. Yes. Getting the axe first.

Yeah. And then the wood chipper. Here's the thing. People say to me, I love that scene. You were so great in that woodchipper scene. I'm like, really? So the one scene you weren't in it. No.

That's what they like you better. I love that. You are both goofy and terrifying in that movie, which is no small feat. That's the Colin brothers. Yes. That's in the writing. Yeah. You managed to be a kind of a cuddly, fun, warm character and just scary is all hell.

And describe twice in the movie as, oh, he's kind of funny looking. Yeah. I've told this story before, but when I read that in the script, and I saw, oh, my character is funny looking. I went, and so I got Joel and Ethan on the phone, and I said, hey, I was thinking maybe I could, like, do something with my nose or, you know, like I could do something to, and there was, like, silence on the phone. And I went, or I can do nothing. I could just. And I went, oh, I guess I'm funny looking. All right, all right.

Our mutual friend Drew Friedman, who's a prominent illustrator in cartoonist, he's done the show. He is obsessed with, when you say, who the fuck are you?

When Hart-Prasnel shows up. Oh, yeah? So it's become a catchphrase around us. How did the Coins come into your life in the first place? I mean,

because Miller's Crossing was your first... Yeah, so I auditioned for Miller's Crossing like in 1988, 88, 89, I think that they filmed played mink. It's one of my favorite movies.

And I came in and I read and there was like five pages of, you know, just mink talking and so I just practiced so that one I did practice and I just talked really fast. And then they

auditioned a lot of other actors. They brought me in about a month later. I did it again. And Ethan said, well, you still say it the fastest. And that was it. And they gave me the wrong. Right. Yeah. And they're famous for not having, not wanting their dialogue to be changed, for wanting it to be. You do everything that's pretty much in the script.

But you don't want to. I mean, it's such. It's poetry. Great dialogue that, yeah. That film in particular, they created a language. They created a whole world. Yeah. You know, yeah, and the language especially.

Give me the high hat and the rump, what's the rumpus and all of that stuff? Just fascinating. Yeah. So how do you say your name again? Just call me, sir. Okay. Have you changed it since the beginning of the show? This is getting like the cab ride now.

It's just like the cab ride. So basically, we're both sitting, staring in front. And you're going, hey, how about those Beatles? And I go, yeah, they were good. You know that I once chased down the guy who played Paul. in Beatlemania. Really? I saw him in Times Square.

He must have been scared. Well, he was with his girlfriend. And now here's, now I had seen Beatlemania and Greece. Those were the only like Broadway shows that I saw in the 70s. And then I don't know how this happened, but I was invited to go see the cast from Beatlemania. Like, you know, those guys were playing at a college in New Jersey. Fairley Dickinson? That sounds right.

Is that the name of it? Right? Yeah. So I had a few drinks in me. I'm with my friends. We're walking through Times Square, and I see the guy who plays Paul McCartney. He walks by me and he's with his girlfriend. And I ran up to him.

And I went, oh, my God! You were great. Hey, I saw you guys at Angie Dickensensens. And he and his girlfriend just bust out laughing in my face. You were close. Yeah. Speaking of that, did people yell movie lines at you?

Like shut the fuck up, Donnie? Yeah. You know, I'm surprised that doesn't happen as often as I thought it would. Really? Yeah. Yeah, every once in a while.

And mostly Cohen Brothers stuff? Mostly Lubowski stuff. Yeah, yeah. I would say that's true. What do they do to you when they walk up to you in the street, Gilbert? Your hands. Is it Afflach?

Is it just... Yeah, yeah. They, uh, they'll go, uh, I have something in this hand. And if you give me, you know, that whole scene I do in Beverly Hillscott, too. Yeah. So after Fargo, yes. You're not auditioning for the Coens anymore. No, I love it that Gilbert only has a casual knowledge of my career.

I'm like, go ahead, Frank. It's really enjoying talking about it. It's kind of like I'm sitting here the whole time going, ah, I think I've seen. seen him in something. I know him from... Either he lives in my building or he's an actor. I don't know. I think he looks familiar.

Did you see me in a Snickers commercial, perhaps? I want to ask you about the Snickers commercial. Please do. Handed me a card of stuff to ask you. I think he just handed you my Wikipedia page. I don't use Wikipedia. It's too unreliable. Yeah, it's true.

We ask this of every guest. So while he's putting his glasses on it. Oh, thank God. Can I ask then? Yeah, God. What do we ask? We ask what they watched as a kid. What movies you fell in love with as a kid?

What TV shows? Because you're a New York kid like us. You probably watch some of the same. Oh, absolutely. Please say the Danny Thomas shows. I love the Danny Thomas show. I was in love with... No, I was in love with...

No, no. What did you watch? I know you watch the Carson show. And Danny Kay and Lawrence Olivier used to finger each other's assholes. Well, you just ruined Hans Christian Anderson. I should say. So frank. Not to mention White Christmas.

I used to watch The Honeymooners is probably my earliest memory of watching TV. But I lived in Brooklyn at the time, you know, in East New York. and my dad was on the sanitation like it's, you know, so I'd see this guy in a uniform, you know, not unlike like what my dad wore, and lots of arguing and yelling and I thought it was a documentary.

You know, this is just about Brooklyn life. I remember seeing the first episode of Gilligan's Island, you know, and the black and white version. Yeah, and being upset, like that they were I didn't know, it was a comedy. Not wondering why Thurston

Howell took all his money on a three-hour tour, Good Lugans Island. Patty Duke. Sure. That girl. What else? Created by our friend Bill Persky, who was one of our guests. Yeah.

I used to watch a lot of TV. And, of course, Three Stooges and Little Rascals. Did you watch Officer Joe Bolton and Captain Jack McCarthy and all the stuff that we used to watch? And I loved when he would actually bring them on. You know, when you would have Mo Howard and the Firey Fine. Yeah, sure. Yeah, I remember. one episode as a kid sitting there, and it opens up, and Mo is standing under his picture.

Oh, wow. And I was so excited. Officer Joe brought Mo on. Yeah. We had Chuck McCann on the show, too. Oh, I love him too. Yeah, I used to watch him all the time. I mean, yeah.

We used to watch TV, like, it seems like that's all I did as a kid. Oh, me too. You know, I mean, yeah, well, I guess we would be outside and play and stuff, but we would, you know, spend hours in front of the TV. I remember not only TV shows, but they had so many old movies on. Yes. That movies that shouldn't have been on in, like, the afternoon. Like, I remember seeing, you know, like, crime in the streets, you know.

Oh, yes, yeah. Like on TV, and, like, in the afternoon. Like the 430 movie? Yeah. Rebel Without a Cause. I remember seeing, you know, like the afternoon movie. The Million Dollar Movie, I think it was called. Right.

Yeah. A lot of movies. Well, you were a Carson fan, too, weren't you, were tonight? show person. Johnny Carson loved watching that. Yeah. Yeah. It seems like but everybody watched those shows, right? And now when I think of it, they were like, how did we do it? We had school the next day.

With four channels. You know what was a strange thing that I realized back then is everybody the next day had something in common. Because we all watch, it wasn't a billion stations. There were like three. I know.

That's true. Yeah. Everybody had something to talk about. Everybody saw the same thing. Yeah, you could stop anyone in the street and go, hey, did you see like Get Smart last night or whatever. I love that show. Yeah, we had Barbara Felton, we had on. Wow, 99. I mentioned Angela Cartwright, right?

Right, like when she was in space. Oh, he just had on Billy Mummy. Yeah, I know. He had Billy Mummy last week. Loved him. Billy Mummy was in my favorite. No, it's Moomy, right? Moomy.

Moomy? Moomy. Yeah. He was in my. And how do you see? And Bussemi. Just remember moo and boo. He was in my favorite Twilight Zone when the phone, remember his grandmother dies?

Yes. And she gives him this phone. We talked to him about it. Oh, my God. The toy phone. The toy phone. I like the one, his other Twilight Zone, where he was with Jack Klugman. And Jack Klugman plays a guy whose son dies in Vietnam, but he wants one more day with him.

Oh my God, I don't know this. Yeah. Oh, it's a great one. What's the name of that one? Praise of Pip. Yeah, it's great. It's touching. He made three.

He made that one, and the one you're talking about, long distance call is the name of the one with a recall. Oh, and the third one is the one where he controls. It's a good life. Yes. Where he wishes people into the cornfield, where he's the kid. He's the little demon kid. They tried to remake it in the movie.

You just reminded me of. and Alfred Hitchcock presents episode where a kid, like a little demon kid, if he had your picture and he like scrape your picture, a mark would, like a mark would appear on your face. It was the scariest thing I had ever seen. It sounds familiar. The man from uncle I loved. Sure. That was a great show. It was big news when Ilya Koryakin, is that, what's that?

Yeah, David McCallum's character. He got married in Valley Stream, which is where I grew up. Really? married a local girl. That was like huge. That is big news. Huge. Let's talk about the Hutsucker proxy a little bit. Okay. And Donnie.

Donnie? Yeah. Huttucker was fun. I only had, yeah, I just, I had that one scene. I was the beatnik bartender. Yeah. That was the only line I ever tried to change. They had me to say, we don't serve alcohol.

Alcohol. I said, Ethan, I don't know. Did people really say that? I say, can I say just alcohol? And he was, no, no, just say alcohol. Oh, I misspoke. I didn't mean Donnie. Well, Donnie's your character in the Big Lubowski.

But in the Hutzucker proxy, you have that great scene where you say martinis are for squares, man. Oh, that's right. Which I loved. See, I forget this stuff. I'm a Coen brothers. I'm a Coen Brothers freak. But since I mentioned, Donnie, just talk a little bit about the Lubowski. I just want to know what kind of set they run.

I mean, is it a loose set? Because you look at a movie like that and you say these guys have to be having fun. They are, but they're, you know, what's funny about them is that they're, they're kind of nothing like the characters that are in their films. You know, I mean, they, they are like the calmest guys. They're so, you know, just laid back and down to earth. But they, they storyboard everything. I don't know if they still do, but they, so everything is sort of mapped out. and yet within that context

you still feel like you know like the actors are allowed to contribute you know but I think in their films that the casting is everything you know I think

and they're I just love them they just it just goes by really it's just easy it's a lot of beeping here is that is that me I think it's a video camera we'll cut that out

okay I have a patient maker I'm leaving Oh, yeah. So don't microwave anything while we're sitting here. This happens to me, though, sometimes. So Living in Oblivion is a film I did where I play a director and who's making a low-budget movie. And at the end of it, there's that beeping sound.

And he goes crazy with this beeping sound. And this has followed me around ever since. We talked about Tom DeChile. Yeah, I like that film. He was the writer-director on that. But that has followed me around. Usually on any set that I'm on, or like today, I hear like, A beeping sound will drive me crazy.

What do you know about this thing I found on the internet, this webtoon called Las Chronicas de Steve Busemi? Are you familiar with this? No, I don't know. You'll have to look. There is a group, like this guy in Belgium has a group called Busemi. Is that it? This is a series of webtoons that are in Spanish with a caricature of you. Oh, yeah.

My wife showed me that. Yeah. Very, very strange. Yes. There's a lot of weird. strange things. There's a lot of weird Busemi's related stuff on the web. Yeah.

Yeah. I don't know what to say about that. Now, I have a list of names to ask you about. Oh, yeah? Okay. Just people recollection. Okay. And he won.

All right. Well, Danny Thomas. Well, who else you got? Danny Kaye. Lawrence Olivier. You didn't work with Danny Kay? Never worked with Danny Kay. I'm surprised.

Or else you'd have to sit on an inner tube to turn this into it. Now, if only you've had this conversation in the cab. Yeah, that would have been a good cab, Ryan. Yeah, it would have been less awkward. Okay. So you weren't? Yes. Has he been drinking?

I wish. You worked with Christopher Walken. I did. King of New York? King of New York. I did. You're right. I did.

The man has made 100 movies, Gilbert. Cut him some slack. See, even you don't know your career. That makes two of us. This is why I feel like I really wasn't in that movie. So I get a call from Abel Farah, and he says, you know, he's doing this movie. King in New York. He wants me to be in it, but it's starting next week. I thought, oh, it's starting, you know. And what happened was he realized, either somebody dropped out

or something, but he wanted me to be in this gang. I think he wanted, like, one other white guy in this all-black gang. But he didn't tell anybody, you know, so I show up for the wardrobe fitting, and they were so surprised to see me because the wardrobe that they gave me was like, well, we thought you were going to be a black guy. We don't have time to do any shopping. So here, just, like, wear this. And then I think once I got on set, Abel, he was like, I think I made a mistake with this, Bashamie guy.

I don't know. And he would, we would come into a room, and he'd tell me, all right, now you guys, you stand here and good, Larry, you know, Larry Fishburn and all the, and Carlos Spasito. Bashmi and, you know, you all don't kind of, like, come forward. Some of you can hang in the back. He would, like, point to me, and, you know, and he keep pointing way in the back until I was, like,

out the door practically. He's like, don't worry, the camera sees everything. And I'm like, but I can't see the camera. I know I'm not. And that's why I felt like I, so I didn't really have any scenes with Chris. I was in a couple of scenes with him. But he was great. He really, he loves to like put in like a little dance move in like any movie he does.

Yeah, well, he, I think he started out wanting to be a song and dance. I think, but I think he was. He was a hoover. Yeah. Yeah. In what's your McCallell? Oh, Penny's from Heaven. Yeah.

He does a great dancer. Great. But I do remember that in King of New York. There's always he's doing a little twirl at various points. Yeah. Oh, William Hickey. See, now, we were in a movie, Tales from the Dark Side, but I was not in his segment. Ah.

Had you watched the movie? It's a long list, Steve. So you've been in movies. I've been in movies. Okay. Albert Finney. You ever? Albert Finney.

You ever even watch a movie with Albert Finney? Big fish. You see, I'm terrible. I forgot to tell you that I'm a terrible guest. I don't have good stories about people. No, no. You've proven it. It's just okay.

It's a terrible host. It works out. This is a terrible interview. All I say about people. It all works together. You can name anybody. You can name anybody. And all I'll say is, yeah, he was fun.

That was good. We're not even recording right now. Can I have a do-over? That's what Dan and Kaye and Lawrence Olifier used to. He would have a do-over backstage. There have to be names on that list of people that were in scenes with him. Okay. Keith Carradine.

Have you ever seen a movie? with John Caratine and we'll take that. Have you ever seen John Caradine as Dracula? And we'll go with that for an answer. You can just go, yeah, his father played Dracula and House of Frankenstein. He was good. How about Joey Pants, Joe Pantleiano? Okay, so the first time I work with Joe Pantiliano was in a film, I'm not going to

remember. It was called Zandali. It was in New Orleans. and he played a transvestite. He was like in drag the whole film. You're nodding your head, but I know you haven't seen this film. I've seen it years ago. Really?

Yeah. I saw Trees Lounge. Okay. I can promise you I haven't seen the film or anything else you've been. I think I saw Zandali on VHS. Yeah. Yeah. That would have been about right.

Yeah. And that's really all you can say. get away from that list. You've never... Ned Beatty? Ned Beatty. We did a movie called Ed and his dead mother.

Ed and his dead mother. That one I have definitely seen. And sometimes he would give me a ride to work in the morning. Nice guy. Nice guy. That's a pretty fascinating. Isn't that a fascinating story?

Was it a better ride than the one with Gilbert? Yes. He would talk to me. He would say, good morning. Steve, how are you? How are you today? How's your family? Where are you from, Steve? He had a general interest in me. So Ned Beatty's more, cares more about other people than I do. Yes. Or basically about you. I know nothing about your career and I don't care. I know you have not like seen anything past 19. That's when you...

That's true, generally speaking. Yes. I'm sorry I was not in the Brady Bunch. I wanted to be. I never got into the Brady Bunch. No? No. Maybe because you're old.

You're older. I was the right age, I think. I wanted to be in that family. So you were thrilled when they called to ask you to play Jan Brady. I did. I did a Snickers commercial. It's very funny. Danny Trejo

plays Marcia Brady and at the end I'm Jan Brady Super Bowl spot He's just nodding very polite He wasn't watching the Super Bowl either It was very funny Gil Take my word for it

Sure it was good What would you like to talk about Steve we got some cards left What are we here You'll want to talk about Ghost World or all the directors You've worked with Would you like to do anything

From here? I would I'm you know what I'm really good at is shadow. Shadow puppets. Okay. All right, I'm going to, if you could just imagine. Oh, my God.

That looks like Lincoln. No, it's Nixon. It's Nixon. You see how the thumb. Oh, that's right. That's Nixon's nose. We will return to Gilbert Gottfried's amazing colossal podcast after this. I, on the Ed Sullivan show.

Yeah. They used to have those shadow. guys on i know i used to see them and i always thought it was cheating sometimes they would hold something in their hand really that yeah that was like some curved piece of paper or something that's how they did it yeah well that's was cheating yeah but the others could do it with their hands right as did danny k and laurence he always goes back there did you play with puppets as a kid do i have this right or is the well i had a internet research no i had they a jerry mahoney doll Oh, a knucklehead Smith and Jerry Mahoney.

Yeah. So I was. Yeah, I used to watch that show a lot. Yeah, I wanted to be a ventriloquist when I was in the sixth grade. Yeah. Hoorah, it's Winchill Mahoney time. It's Winchill Mahoney time. Let's have some fun.

Hooray, hurrah, we're glad everybody's here. Come on. Let us give a cheer for everyone. Get ready in your places. Put on your happy faces. Ah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. Hoorah, shish, boom, bah. Scotty Wadi, do, do, do, do.

Scotty Wadi, do do, do, do. I remember that part. That's amazing. And Nucklehead Smith? The other side, the other side. And Paul Winchell went on, too. Do you know this? He invented the artificial heart.

How about that? Paul Winchell. How about that? He just, I don't know, he got scrubs. on the thing, but he invented the first artificial heart. Or some version of the artificial heart, some prototype. Was he trying to get one of his dummies to come alive?

Why would he do that? So you had a Jerry Mahoney puppet? Yes, yeah. With the string in the back. Yeah, I think our friend Tom Leopold has a Jerry Mahoney puppet. Oh, yes. Now here's an obscure one. I remember Paul

had like a woman doll puppet that was like some Jewish woman. Really? And he used to talk in like an accent. Like a Sylvia Miles puppet? Yeah, yeah, kind of. Yeah, yeah. Very strange. I don't remember that.

I remember he would come down on a slide to open the show. Oh, yes. I heard he's got it patented. He used to draw a face on his chin and be upside down. and then like the nose and the rest of the face were covered. You will never do another show like this one, Steve. I'll tell you right now. Paul Winchell, Danny Kay, and the rest of your career.

I'm learning things this morning. You know what I realized? This is good. I know a hell of a lot more about Paul Winch's one, Steve Bassett. I can't get Paul Winchell's going to be a long-distance call, buddy. I ran out of a question. after asking him how to pronounce his name.

But Paul Winchell, I could go on for two hours. I could spend another five days on. Oh, God. I'd like to ask you about directing. Okay. My wife is a big 30 Rock fan. We watch you on 30 Rock and watch the episodes that you directed.

Thank you. And this is a dumb question. But of all the directors that you watched work over the years, the Coens, Robert Benton, John Carpenter, Tarantino, Joe, Tim Burton, do you pick up a little bit from each of them? Do you watch them? Do you just have your own thing?

You know, all the directors, like the really good ones that I've worked with, I think what they're really good at is making everybody feel like they're collaborating. Unlike Abel Ferrar. I love Abel. Stand in the back. Right. Yeah, you know, it's, I don't direct enough. I mean, so every time I do it, I'm like scared to death.

I just directed an episode of Portlandia. And, you know, it couldn't have been like the most welcoming set, and I love Fred and Carrie. And, but I was still so scared. It's, you know, it's, and I just wish that I could do it more. But I think the reason that I want to do it is because I secretly want to play every part. I see. So no danger of you transitioning into a full time. I would love to.

I would like to direct more and come back and do your show in another 10 years so Givert could, you know, not have seen the movies I directed, too. I can virtually guarantee that. No interest in your career. I'm going to do the Danny Thomas story. Now you got me. You like, you sucked me into this. Yes. Well, that's what Danny Kay and Lawrence Olympia would suck each other into this.

Well, I would like to know For the record, I don't care. Gilbert doesn't care. I'd like to know a lot, but we're never going to get to it. But let me ask if you're still doing your AOL show, which is a lot of fun. I'm doing, yes, Park Bench, where I interview people on a park bench, we were going to have Gilbert Gowardt. I would advise against it. Rethink it, Steve.

No, I'm going to have Gilbert on. And, yeah, so we do it in parks around the city, but we also have our own bench. and we bring the bench into various, like we, to Julian Schnabel's house, or we brought it into the Rubin Museum, and I interviewed a Buddhist nun, and lots of laughs in that one. I didn't see that one, but I saw the Dick Cavett episode. The Dick Cavett episode was where I was basically trying to learn from Dick Cavett, because he is the best.

His show was incredible. What a show he was. Oh, yeah. We had him on. He was our first guest. Him, I was interested in it. you were actually intimidated to talk to dick i was i mean come on like you know any anybody that i meet that i knew as a kid that i watched as a kid i i i get really nervous around i just i can't

that's refreshing that even at this stage after a hundred films that you're not jaded by the yeah no it's you know i get nervous around people i get nervous around gilbert but for other reasons before we run off yeah he's just staring at it's just i just came for the The lunch. I was promised lunch. It's a good lunch. We should say we're at the Friars Club, too. You don't remember anyone you've ever worked with. I don't.

And I have no idea what you do for a living. And I just want to talk about Paul and show. Well, here's something you both have in common. What, please? You could relate to. You both do a fair amount of cartoon voiceover work. We do. Yes.

Yeah. And you were in Monsters University, and Monster Zinc and Monster House written by Dan Harmon is one of our guests and many other things. Yes. This is... Wait, G-Force,

G-Force, Charlotte's Web, which I saw. You did. Yes, with Jean-Clees. That was intimidating to do, like, you know... Was Keith Carrotian? That's by any chance. I kept wanting to do like a Paul In-voice for Charlotte's Webb, but they didn't want that.

Oh, really? Now, there's a throwback. Well, he played the original. Of course. Of course. What's the character's name? Templeton. Templeton, the rat. Okay, good. Now I can tell my Pauline story again. Have that it.

Oh, please. Steve will appreciate it. Paul Lynn was once being brought into some dinner theater production of something, and he went in and it looked like a barn. and Paul Lynn disgusted goes, this place smells like a cunt, I think. Oh my God, that's good. The story that keeps on giving.

I know about Paul Lynn. Anything you want to know about Paul Lynn, I can tell you what the other hand. Well, this has been the Comedy Central roast of Steve Busemi. I'm going to go over to Gilby. Brits House now and get some of those socks. I think you owe me at least that. Tell us what's coming up. I know you're making a

Sandler, another Sandler picture. We did, yes. I did Adam Sandler's movie, The Ridiculous Six. I did another movie called Well, you know what's out now? I don't know when this is going to air, but I did the cobbler's out now. The Cobbler. Tom McCarthy, a brilliant filmmaker. He did Win Win Win. Box of Moon.

The Station Agent. Did he direct that? No, that was Tom. That was Tom Chillo. I'm saying. I'm getting them confused. That was. Station. Yeah, station. Yeah. Stationing. Good film. Yes. And that was the midgett movie. God. Don't get him on that.

The cobbler. Adam Sandler's in it. Yeah. And then I just did a movie with this Israeli director, Joseph Cedar, called Oppenheimer Strategies with Richard Gear. And I play a rabbi in that one. So you're working constantly. Yes. more episodes of... I'm just making loads of shit, Gilbert

has no interest in seeing... I actually... This is how I choose my parts. I go... I don't know. I think Gilbert might like this one. Maybe I shouldn't do it.

What would Gilbert hate? What would he, like, just... Look at the ad and go, I'm never going to see that. Why? Who would want to see this? Who the fuck of the Cohen brothers anyway? I'm not going to see this. That's how I've chosen my roles over the year. It was from that cab ride from long ago.

It just made such an impression. The cab ride should have warned you. Should have given you an indication of what today would be like. You hoped for different. You were disappointed. And more episodes of Park Bench. More episodes of Park Bench that we're going to do in April. I should say it's a very funny premise.

It's you and your brother. and your brother is doing a competing show. My brother has a competing show called Bench Talk. That's very funny. No surprise. I've never seen this. Yes. It's going to be great. I can't wait to have you on the bench, Gilbert.

That's what Tanny K. said to Large Olympia. Google it when you get home, Steve. I know it. I know it. I know it already. Tanny Thomas said, I can't wait to get under the bench. It's a great clip of Malcolm McDowell actually telling the story, Danny Kay and Olivier at the London airport. So apparently it really happened.

Although when Malcolm McDowell tells it, he says that Lawrence Olivier stuck his finger in Danny Kay's ass. I had heard that Danny Kay stuck his finger in Olivier's ass. If you had a guess. It's like Rashomon. Everyone has a version. But Malcolm McAllen said he witnessed this? He didn't say he witnessed it. In an airport?

I see, I would like to think that both Danny Kay and Lawrence Olivier had their fingers in each other's assholes the same amount of time because it was an equal relationship. Something sweet about that. Yeah, that they cared enough about each other to shove their fingers. other's assholes exactly the right amount of time. What more can you ask for from a relationship?

And I want to say, I know more about Lawrence Olivier and any case figures in each other's assholes that I know about Steve was semi-scar. I think he's had enough punishment. So when this is edited together, it'll be like 13 minutes. We would think of it like a segue podcast ever. Like one to put between funny sound effects. Some Spike Jones.

You always hurt the the ones you love about Spike Jones. And Paul Winchell. And Willie Tyler and Lester and Farful. Danny O'Day and Farful? Yes.

And what was the other guy? Faithful. What was the other? guy who worked with puppets. Sherry Lewis. No. Senior Wences? No.

No. No. A guy with work with puppets. Fidel or Fidel or... Five-ish Finkel? No. I'm just throwing. I can tell, see, now, five-ish-fifilkull is sitting here.

I think he's in the club right now. I could bring him up here. Gilbert would like that. Well, the problem is you're one of the youngest. guess we've had, Steve. And if you come back when you're 80, there's a much better chance of him and taking more in an active interest. You're like talking to

a fetus on this show. I should do now. What I should have done, right after I got to pronounce your name. And that's wrap up the show. Okay. Okay. Okay. Hi, I'm Gilbert Gottfried.

I know how to pronounce that. And this has been Gilbert Gottfried's amazing colossal podcast. Except today. Next week, we're having Broderick Crawford. And I'll have loads to talk to him about. That's another toll call, buddy. We'll be talking to Dwight Fry in two weeks for now. But today, we've been saddled with Steve Busemi.

but we learned the correct pronunciation of his name. I had a wonderful time here today, and I hope you still come on part 10. I'd like to thank you, Steve, and apologize at the same time. No, I apologize. I'm sorry, I didn't know enough about Danny Kay and Lawrence Olivia. Or Paul Winchell. Yes, yes. That was great.

Thanks for doing it, buddy. Thank you so much, guys.