Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - Marilu Henner
Episode Date: January 6, 2020Actress and best-selling author Marilu Henner joins Gilbert and Frank for a laugh-filled conversation about the sex appeal of Danny DeVito, the physical comedy of John Ritter, the star power of Burt... Reynolds and the "gift" of her unusual (and uncanny) memory. Also, Larry David pens a love letter, Charles Durning teaches ballroom dancing, Gilbert flirts with Princess Leia and Marilu looks back on the films "L.A. Story," "Johnny Dangerously" and "Cannonball Run II." PLUS: Dom DeLuise! The legend of Andy Kaufman! Bob Costas' "Ed Ames moment"! Shirley MacLaine works the room! Ol' Blue Eyes plays the MDA telethon! And Marilu picks her favorite episodes of "Taxi"! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Hi, this is Gilbert Gottfried,
and this is Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast with my co-host, Frank Santopadre.
Our guest this week is a much-admired actress
of stage and screen,
a former radio host, a former TV talk show host,
a best-selling author, a lifestyle guru, and one of the most refreshingly candid
and forthcoming figures in the entertainment business. You know her work from films like Noises Off, Cannibal Run 2,
The Man Who Loved Women, Perfect, L.A. Story, Johnny Dangerously, Man on the Moon, and dozens
of appearances on the small screen in shows like Sybil, George and Leo, Providence, ER, Grey's Anatomy, Party Down,
Two and a Half Men, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, and of course, the long-running comedy series,
Shade, and the iconic series Taxi, in which she starred as Loveland cab driver Elaine Nardo.
She's also worked extensively on Broadway and Off-Broadway stage in shows such as Grease, Pal Joey, Chicago, Annie Get Your Gun, and The Tale of the Allergist's Wife, and has written 10, count them, 10 books at topics of health, fitness, diet, and child rearing.
child-rearing. In a career that began way back when she was named the Outstanding Teenager of Illinois, she's worked with some of the most celebrated artists in the last half century,
including Burt Reynolds, John Travolta, Francis Ford Coppola, James L. Brooks, Carol Burnett, Steve Martin, including Ed Weinberger, Amy Heckerling,
Griffin Dunn, James Burroughs, Richard Kine, and Treat Williams.
Hey, she even worked with the Andrew Sisters.
The Andrew Sisters.
Please welcome to the show a performer of multiple interests and talents. A woman who claims that she finds Danny DeVito sexier than Robert Redford.
The pride of Madonna High School, the delightful Mary Lou Henner.
Oh my gosh, that is hilarious.
And it's funny because you guys, you talked about everything except the one thing that everybody talks about now.
And it's like, I can't believe you didn't mention it.
And it's probably better that you didn't.
And that's the whole memory thing.
That weird, yeah. We'll get to it oh yeah yeah yeah I know but it's like it's so funny because people always talk about that like first thing and so it's like oh you don't want to talk about
taxi you know things like that so funny last night when I was thinking okay Mary Lou Hanna is going to be on the show. It got me to call my old friend Larry David.
Oh.
Oh, my gosh.
Do you know my history with Larry?
Yeah, years ago.
I want to hear what he said.
I want to hear what he said.
Me and Larry David years ago used to talk to each other often and call each other.
And it would always be something in the trying to get laid category
and failing horribly.
We both would regale each other with stories.
So he told me a story that belongs on curbing your enthusiasm.
He was a regular on the show Fridays.
Yes, correct. And at the same time, I was on my terrible season of SNL.
Oh. So he was a of SNL. Oh.
So he was a regular on Fridays.
Right.
And you were the guest host.
That's right.
March 19th, 1982.
Of course.
There she goes.
That's when it was.
This is going to get very annoying.
I know.
That's why I'm on my third and final husband.
Yeah.
You'll go Tuesday, 1803.
No, I don't go back that far.
She only does within her own lifetime.
So, Larry told me a story that he took you out on a date.
Yes, he did.
And, yes.
I want to hear more.
What did he say?
He goes, so I was working with Mary Lou Hanna, you know, the girl from Taxi.
I didn't date Bernie Sanders.
Oh, my God.
And he, they both sound exactly the same.
I saw, they do, amazing.
But now, having you do both of them, it's just, I mean, having you do Larry, I realize, whoa, even more so.
So he said, you know, he, of course, was very attracted to you.
Oh, we flirted my entire week.
And I was going through, like, a separation from my husband at the time, my first husband, we flirted my entire week. And I was going through like a separation from
my husband at the time, my first husband, my first ex-husband. But I was like, oh my God,
I'm in love with this guy. And I just thought this is not the right timing. And we ended up
going on a date. This is my side of the story. We ended up going on a date and he was so darling
and so wonderful. And I had such a huge crush on him but it was just like
a weird time in my life and by the time it wasn't a weird time and I was divorced he wasn't available
so that's what happened but he didn't tell you that part did no no the story he told he didn't
get laid I just want to make that very clear from the very beginning. Unfortunately, I guess, but no. We never had that kind of thing. With both me and
Larry, the term
he didn't get laid
goes without saying.
Now, he told
me, and
he went into long detail.
He said, so, you know,
the date was,
the date went well.
I got a couple laughs from her.
And then he said, so then it became a problem.
I was asking some friends of mine, when do you make the second phone call?
And he was obsessing about the second phone call.
Aw.
And then he decided to write you a note.
Write me a note.
I still have that note.
I still have that letter.
I do.
I do.
And it's funny because we've seen each other quite a few times since then.
And we always say, oh, you know, the one that got away, the road not taken, that kind of thing.
Yeah.
Because I still have a big crush on him.
Yeah.
So he said he was, you know, know he went he called all his friends he
goes when so i didn't even know this part of it i'm gonna have to really tease him next time i see
when should i call her next time should it be like a week two days a month you know and really
that's so funny and and then he said he wrote you a note. He composed it very carefully.
And he sent you, he said, he asked one of his friends,
his friend John that both of us know,
who gets laid as much as me and Larry do.
And he asked him for advice.
And he said, send her the note now.
And he sent her, and he always felt, he lived with the thing that that was the worst mistake.
Oh, really?
No, I still have it.
Tell him I still have it.
Oh, that's so funny.
No, tell him I still have it because it was so charming and funny.
And what he did in the note is he did what he said to me at dinner.
And then what was the really bubble above his head, what he was really thinking and saying when he said these things and it's so funny and it's all about you know ripping my
clothes off and blah blah but he's being very polite at the dinner and he's it was you know he
he was a genius always see yeah you know you could take that note and bring it to any studio
and probably get him yeah on Netflix yeah they'll offer you a billion dollars to make it into a series.
Probably.
It's so funny.
Yeah, so he sent the note, and he lived in shame and horror.
Oh, my gosh.
I didn't even know this part of the story.
Wow.
That he screwed up horribly.
No, not at all.
No, it was just a bad, he knows.
It was a bad time in my life because I
didn't, I was really going through a separation when we worked together and then subsequently
a divorce within a year. So it was just a bad time. You know, it was like we were separated.
I went on this date. I had such a good time. I was hoping to go out with him again and then thought
I have to, you know, settle what's going on at home first. But your first book, which we were talking about, Mary Lou,
before we turned the mics on,
your second husband called you a Jew groupie.
Yeah, always.
You know, I always say that as a Catholic.
Mary Lou, I'm a Jew.
That's why I'm here, babe.
I'm your groupie.
Just in case you're asking.
I think Catholic schoolgirls always have a thing for Jewish guys because we have what is known as our prayer book or our missal,
and it's for Mass every day.
In Catholic school, you go at least—if you don't go every day,
you go to Mass in the morning in October, during Advent, during Lent,
and during May, every morning.
And so we have these missals, these prayer books with the gospel and everything else,
and it's the Mass, and we had holy cards, and the holy cards were always of the apostles,
and they were these long-haired, bearded Jewish guys.
So I think it's, we're, you know, programmed.
It's in our DNA to have crushes on Jewish guys.
Well, what about that reference in the intro, Mary Lou?
And I bring it up again because Dara pointed to herself that she agrees with you about
finding Danny DeVito sexier than Robert Redford.
And Dara pointed to herself.
She's on your team.
Oh, my gosh.
Danny is one of the sexiest men I've ever—you can just tell.
He, like, loves women.
He loves sex.
He's just—he's like a little devilish guy.
He's so much fun. He loves sex. He's just, he's like a little devilish guy. He's so much fun. I adore
him. He was kind of the Yoda of the group and he was my confidant all the time. And our dressing
rooms were right next to each other. So we really like bonded and we talk all the time. He is so,
no, Danny's hot. You don't become a star like that unless you have some, okay. I said this on
another podcast, but I'll just, because it'll cut to the chase.
My family, we have an expression in our family, PF.
And PF, it refers to the sexual quotient of something.
You know, like you could say, oh man,
there was so much PF at that restaurant last night. Or, oh, I saw that movie, no PF between the two co-stars.
And you're constantly talking about PF, PF, PF.
And what it really stands for is penis
factor and pussy factor. And it's what radiates off of somebody. You know, it's like BDE. People
talk about BDE. No, that's too sexist. It's got to be PF because then it takes care of everybody.
Gotcha. And it, you know, because it can, and some of the sexiest people are not really what
you would consider conventionally handsome or beautiful.
And in fact, sometimes those people are boring and they have no PF.
But Danny has a gorgeous face and he is sexy.
Tons of PF.
Now, can you please tell me that I have pussy factor?
I don't know.
This is our first date.
I don't know.
And yours would be penis factor.
Yours would be a different Pia.
Yeah.
If you have pussy factor, you're in trouble, Gil.
Now, this brings me to the next question.
Okay.
Did Danny DeVito ever nail you?
No.
No, no, no.
He was with Rhea the whole time that we were all together and everything else.
No, no, no.
No.
We're all really good friends.
His birthday was just last week.
And I texted him and stuff. He's great. I love Danny. I, no, no. No, we're just all, we're all really good friends. His birthday was just last week and I texted him and stuff.
He's great.
I love Danny.
I love all those guys.
I'm still close to all of them.
You still stay in touch with everybody?
Yeah, I just talked to Judd
last week, Tony.
That's great.
Tony, I talked to the most.
Jim Brooks, I talked to
even more than I talked to Tony.
And we just had lunch recently
a couple of weeks ago
and I'm going to see him
in the next couple of weeks.
And Tony and I performed together.
No, no, no.
I'm close to all of them. Then Judd was in town and we were trying to get
together. And Chris, I went to his pre-engagement, I went to his engagement party and then he got
married and, you know, no, we're all really close. That's nice. Yeah, it's great. It's great.
Judd Hirsch, you said you learned a lot from him. I love that you're working on, you're getting your
information from my book from 25 years ago,
because I wrote it when I was pregnant with my son, and he's now 25. He turned 25 in May.
Gilbert has no actual information. We can talk about the 25 years ago. I remember all of it.
It's fine. Oh, yeah. No, Judd was great. I mean, he's a great guy. You know, he's intense and funny and passionate and a brilliant actor and, yeah.
And Jewish.
See? Oh,
may I remind you again, I'm a Jew.
I know.
I think he's got a little crush on me. Is that what's going on
here? Is that what's happening after Larry
David? You have a crush
on everybody. I know. Carrie Fisher
told him something similar, Mary Lou, that
he was her type. Oh, yeah. I know. Carrie Fisher told him something similar, Mary Lou, that he was her type.
Oh, yeah.
I like those kind of, yeah.
Neurotic.
Carrie Fisher told me.
I love Carrie.
Carrie told me that, and I repeat this to everybody, she was once looking at me smiling on a roast we did together.
And she said, you are just my type.
Short, Jewish, and funny.
Oh, yeah.
Well, funny is mandatory.
Not Jewish.
She didn't say Jewish because she's a Jew.
She said, I'm thinking of Jew because I'm getting horny looking at you.
So, no.
Thank you.
She said, short, funny, and cute.
Oh.
Okay.
And you took it?
You liked it?
Yeah.
Of course.
He's going to run with that.
And I'll repeat it to anybody who asks me to.
I got it.
As long as we're bringing up Taxi, let's talk about your favorite episode.
Because I just watched it again last night.
Oh, you did?
Because you heard me talk about it?
Shut It Down.
Oh, Shut It Down, parts one and two.
That was a great episode because, you know, Taxi, the guys hated to lose anything.
So they would just shape it, like, you know, I mean, it was just like so meticulous all week.
And they'd just shape it and carve out anything that wasn't working so that whatever we shot
ended up on film
and ended up as the episode.
So we always had
a Tuesday run through
and they got to the Tuesday run through
for the episode
and they said,
we can't get rid of anything.
This is too good.
It's so good.
It's going to run over.
We're about to go away for Christmas.
Let's make it a two-parter
and make it a two-part episode
that we shoot in one week.
And because Danny and I were like the leads of that episode, we had the most to do,
they felt like, okay, if any two people can handle it, Mary Lou and Danny can.
And so I went and rehearsed our little tango number and everything else over at his house,
and Ria was watching us and making sure that we were like really good.
It's about where the cabbies go on strike, and I am the shop steward.
And in order to settle the strike,
I negotiate a date with Danny.
And the two of us like walk through the garage
and do this negotiation.
And that's my favorite scene
that I ever got to do on Taxi.
And if you notice,
I am wearing very high boots and painful shoes
because I had to give myself a stomach ache.
Otherwise I would laugh too much because Danny was the devil, and he was always making
me laugh.
So you—
And that was the one where you dressed and did your hair.
Oh, yeah.
She's an apologist.
Oh, my gosh.
I've got, like, four coats on.
Right.
I have no makeup.
I have a little tight bun in my hair, and I have no personality, and he takes me on this
date.
But it's really funny.
I mean, it's great.
And we do a tango
and he's been greasing palms all day.
He says, you know,
and oh, he was fantastic
in that episode.
And he keeps saying,
as part of the negotiation,
he wanted you to call him Stallion.
Stallion.
Oh my God.
Okay.
So yeah, because I say,
okay, all right,
I'll go on the date with you.
It's lunch.
We, you know,
I meet you at the restaurant.
We sit at separate tables
and everything else. And, you know, and then we, he negotiates. He goes, no, no, no. Okay. I pick you up. It's We, you know, I meet you at the restaurant. We sit at separate tables and everything else.
And, you know, and then we, he negotiates.
He goes, no, no, no.
Okay, I pick you up.
It's not, you know, it's nighttime.
I pick you up, something like this.
And then within earshot of at least three people, you must call me stallion.
And none of this is negotiable.
I say, except stallion.
He goes, especially stallion.
And Danny was such a devil because I'd always laugh when he said stallion. And he goes, especially Stallion. And Danny was such a devil because I'd always laugh when he said Stallion.
So what he'd start to do is like lean forward, stamp his foot, snort a little.
You know, he would like constantly add things to make me laugh at him.
I also found it interesting that you said that Louis De Palma was the most indispensable character.
Oh, no question about it.
He's the only one.
The rest of us could have come and gone, you know,
if the show had lasted a long time.
People could have gone in and out of the series.
But Danny was so unusual and so rare as a character and so special.
I mean, when he comes out of that cage for the first time in the first episode,
and he goes like, Rieger, Rieger, Rieger, you know,
because Alex Rieger, that's Judd Hirsch's character's name.
And he comes down, and people realize the heightieger, Rieger. You know, because Alex Rieger, that's Judd Hirsch's character's name. And he comes down and people realize the height difference.
A star was born.
People went crazy.
And we spoke to James Burroughs.
Oh, yeah.
We had him here a couple of weeks ago.
And he said that old thing like, if Danny DeVito was normal height,
people would have hated him, how mean he was on that show.
But he becomes this lovable character who's a prick.
Yeah, but you know what?
Danny gets so much for free because not only is he a brilliant actor,
but there's not only a pathos because of his height,
but also there's something he knew how to mine a character in
such a way. And you could, he'd always take it back to, no matter how they tethered him out to
be a nice guy. Like there was an episode where I, I'm, I get him fired because he peeks in.
Oh, the peephole, yeah.
The peephole one. Yeah, Louis goes too far, it was called. Anyway, fourth season. Anyway,
so he, I get him fired and he comes to my house and begs for his job back,
and he ends up telling this beautiful story, which is a true story based on Danny's life,
about how his mother had to shop for him in the Huskies.
He had to shop in the Huskies department with all the other mothers and kids,
and that was a real Danny story.
And the two of us are crying and stuff, and he says,
Oh, Nardo, is that how I made you feel?
And I say, Kindly. He says, Oh, I'm sorry. And we hug. And of course, at the last second, he grabs my butt. So then it's like, yep,
he's still Louie. No matter what, he's still Louie.
I remember when I saw that, I thought him grabbing your ass was perfect.
Oh, yeah, totally. Sometimes you watch something and you go,
gee, that character
wouldn't...
It shows he's still the same person.
Yes, right.
It's a credit to the actor, though, that he could pull off playing somebody
so evil and so
vulnerable and so sad.
You know, there's a pity
to him. I mean, every layer.
He's fantastic.
Have you guys talked to him yet?
You've got to get him on the show.
He's a talker.
We haven't had him yet.
We'd love to have him here.
He's great.
He's fantastic.
Danny's one of a kind.
Yeah, he's the only one that was totally indispensable to the show.
And became a terrific director, I might add.
Oh, yeah, definitely.
I mean, War of the Roses and Hoffa.
Really good work, good stuff. Yeah, he mean, War of the Roses and Hoffa. Really good work.
He started directing some of the taxi episodes and stuff.
So, you know, that's where he kind of cut his teeth on that.
And then he ended up directing things after the show.
I also watched Delane's Secret Admirer again.
Oh.
I mean, I've seen these dozens of times.
That's so sweet.
Thank you so much.
That one, and he's good in that one, too.
He has moments in that one.
But that's really your episode and Chris Lloyd's episode.
Chris Lloyd.
That was a really special one.
And if you ever watch it again, all the names that, as I'm trying to figure out who is it that's sending me the secret,
the conceit of the show is that I break up with somebody once again, and I'm having a terrible time,
and so all of a sudden I start getting these beautiful love notes.
And I think it's this one guy in the garage.
But then Judd realizes who it is, and it's really Reverend Jim, you know,
Christopher Lloyd's character, writing them to me.
But as I'm trying to guess from Judd, I start naming off all these names.
And it's all the crew guys.
Oh, great.
So I just started naming off all of them.
Perfect.
Yeah.
That last scene is magical, too, when you come into your apartment.
He cuts up his van.
He cut his van up to build you the castle.
Yeah, it's so beautiful.
Yeah.
I mean, that's one of the keys to what makes that show great is the sweetness.
Yeah, because, you know, it's funny.
Years ago, years ago when the DVDs first came out, my boys were young.
We were taking a road trip. And they were like, we're going to watch some videos.
It's like, no, you're not watching anything.
We're playing games.
We're going to sing songs.
We're going to do this.
And they said, what about taxi?
And I said, okay, maybe when it gets a little dark, we can put on taxi.
So now I'm listening to, because I'm not the kind of mother where my kids have seen everything.
I just was never that kind of mom.
I wasn't show and tell mom.
So they start watching, and I'm thinking, oh, God, and I can only hear it in the back
seat, from the back seat.
And I'm hearing like little titters and stuff.
By the third episode, all Danny had to do was walk out, and they were cracking up.
You know, it's the kind of show that it's so character driven, and it's funny because
you know those people, and they're so special.
You know, it's amazing.
And one thing we ask every actor, are you one of those people who watches yourself and goes, ah, why did I do it that way?
Well, I think having the memory I have, I don't have to watch it to feel that way.
I remember what I did.
You know what I mean?
I'll think back on a line
and I'll be like,
oh, why did I do it that way?
I'm always,
I'm very self-critical,
but I don't mind.
That's good.
I take my little whip out
and try to learn for next time.
There are certain things
that I love that I did
and certain things
that I wish I could do over again.
Well, we've asked this question
of a lot of the actors
that we've had here.
Are you able to escape into it
and lose yourself in the story?
Or this is, of course,
this question specifically for you, the person with the miraculous memory, or do you find
yourself thinking about things that you were going through in your life at that particular time?
Well, with Taxi, especially, like people ask me, oh, what was going on this episode or whatever?
And I'll always give them the date we shot it rather than the date it played because it was my experience of it.
And I'm like doing lines from it and everything else.
So it's, you know, it's,
I don't forget what the experience was like shooting it
or what the episode was about.
So is that what you mean?
Yeah.
Do I like lose myself like,
oh, I'm just, oh, I can't believe
I even said that as the character.
The show is so well written.
Do you actually allow yourself to
get carried away? Do you get caught
up in the scene? Oh, well, you do because
it is so good, but I'm still there.
You're there. You're thinking about it.
That was a Tuesday I had a stomachache.
Yeah. I had Italian for lunch.
Because I got off dairy.
I get that. You do.
Sometimes I'll watch a scene
in a movie and I'll go, oh, God, I was having a rotten day that day.
I always like to notice what take they use.
Like, oh, man, that was take 13.
I loved 11, but we lost the light on 11, you know, or something happened on 11 or something like that, you know. Now, we've hinted at it before all through the show, but tell us about
this really weird talent that you have. Talent that I was born with. You know, I've had this
thing my whole life. I didn't know it was that rare until the whole 60 Minutes thing came up
because Leslie Stahl is a friend of mine, and she was offered a story about a woman who had
an unusual memory, and she passed on it because she said, it's not that unusual.ahl is a friend of mine, and she was offered a story about a woman who had an unusual memory,
and she passed on it because she said,
it's not that unusual.
I have a friend with the exact same memory
because anyone who knew me knows,
has always known that I have an unusual memory
because it was always like,
oh, remember the last time we saw each other, blah, blah, blah.
And so then she passed on the story.
They put it on Primetime Live with Diane Sawyer,
and then three years later, Leslie called me, and she said, we are going to do a story on it.
So basically what it is, it's called Highly Superior Autobiographical Memory.
And the people who have it remember virtually every day of their life.
They've wired us, put us through an MRI, taken 300 measurements of our brains, and they have found nine areas 10 times larger than the normal brain.
Wow.
So it's kind of like freaky and interesting.
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Now, isn't it, I also
heard, I don't know if you have this too,
where you could say
a date to you and you could say
whether it was Monday, Tuesday,
Wednesday. Yeah, sure she can.
Okay, I have no way of knowing if
this is right or wrong.
You're going to give me a date?
1973, August 5th.
August 5th, 1973 was a Sunday.
This is scary.
Look it up.
Do you have it?
We have Dara in the next room.
We'll have her cross-check it.
August 5th, 1973 was a Sunday.
That's amazing enough. You saw how fast I said it. August 5th, 1973 was a Sunday. That's amazing enough.
You saw how fast I said it, right?
Oh, God.
But I heard you on an interview and you were actually, you could remember, somebody threw
a date at you and you could remember you were in a restaurant.
You remember what you had.
No, I can tell you what I was doing on that date.
You had an argument with somebody.
You had a lover's quarrel.
Yeah.
It's uncanny.
Now, I'm asking.
We're looking it up. Well, we believe her. She's uncanny. Now, I'm asking. We're looking it up.
Well, we believe her.
She's never wrong.
But I still have to have that confirmation.
You have to.
That's okay.
This is scary.
What about February 7th, 1961?
That's my birthday.
Oh, that's your birthday.
That's my birthday.
February 7th, 1961.
So I was little.
Okay, so February 7th, 1961 was a Tuesday.
Unbelievable.
Right?
Wow.
It was a Tuesday.
Okay.
It was a Tuesday.
Yeah, but August 5th, I can tell you exactly what I was doing.
And what I saw the movie, Oh, Lucky Man.
If you remember that movie.
Sure, Malcolm McDowell.
I was doing the show.
Yeah, Malcolm McDowell.
Uh-huh.
On that day.
Oh my gosh.
And there was a softball game
because I was doing
the First National Company
of Greece
and it was,
and we did it
in Rancho Park
and the ushers
beat us that day.
Incredible.
And Barry Bostwick pitched.
Barry Bostwick.
Very good.
Who was playing Danny.
Right, Danny Zubik.
1973.
We're back to 73.
Why are you picking the same year?
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
Pick another year.
1978.
Uh-huh.
1978.
Okay. July 12th. 1978. Okay.
July 12th.
That was, okay, that was a Wednesday.
Oh, you know what?
Oh, my God, 78?
Yeah.
That was our first camera blocking day on Taxi.
Oh, shit. Because we started July the 5th.
Oh, yeah.
And our first episode that we shot was July 14th.
You mentioned that in the book.
So that was Wednesday.
Nice, nice kill.
Oh, fuck. You mentioned that in the book. So that was Wednesday. Nice kill. Oh, fuck.
You just landed on that.
See, I can ask an intelligent question by accident.
Yeah.
No, it's fun for me because sometimes I'll put, you know, I'll hook up my phone and I'll listen to an entire album.
And I'll pick a year and just go through every day of that year.
And just refresh what I did and, like, think about it. Almost like I'm watching a movie of just go through every day of that year and just refresh what I
did and like think about it almost like I'm watching a movie of myself. It's a gift really.
But not watching, I'm inside my body. It's a gift. It's a gift, total gift. How does this affect you
in your career? Well, I mean, you know, I always tell people if they have a kid or something or
they're worried about having this kind of memory like their grandson has it or their child has it
or something. I always say get them into show business, get them into acting
class because you want to use that material from your life. You know, we do sense memory exercises
as actors and you're always trying to think like, what can I draw on from my own life that reminds
me of this character? So it definitely has helped that way. I think in the beginning, I would like
learn my lines so quickly that I would just do them the same way every time rather than sense around like, why is my character saying that?
Or what does my character feel like saying now?
And what is the line?
So I purposely don't learn lines immediately because I know I just have to look at it twice and I've got them.
And if I can't get them immediately, it's because there's usually a grammatical error or there's something that hasn't tracked logically for me. It's absolutely fascinating. I've heard you say
too that people have different triggers, that some people it's sound or music and some people it
smells. Yeah, everyone, I always describe it this way. Everyone has what I call their primary track.
It's like in the jigsaw puzzle of your life, what are the hard-edged pieces by which
you can interlock other pieces to? So it could be travel, sports, food. Phil Rosenthal is food.
And I asked him about a long time ago, and he said, food, food. Because I said, oh,
is your primary track, you know, everybody loves Raymond's scripts? And he said, no, no, no,
it's food. And then now he has those shows. But it, there's your primary
track and then everyone has what I call a dominant sense. Everyone is a sight, sound, touch, taste,
or smell person. So when you can, when you can, you know, cross connect your primary track with
your dominant sense, you can figure out how you receive, retain, and then retrieve memories.
Because we, the people who have HSAM, we just happen to have an extraordinary retrieval
system.
And everybody, you know, everything you've been through is on your emotional hard drive
and it's right there.
And that's why you can smell something, you can taste something, you can get a massage
and all of a sudden it's like, why am I thinking of Paris?
Or why am I thinking of my grandmother's house or something?
Wow.
You know?
Yeah.
I heard that smell is one of the most direct.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
That's really strong.
That's closest to your memory part.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You could smell something and get happy or sad or angry about something.
Or buy a house because they've been making apple cider or cinnamon cookies or something.
It's like, I have to have this house.
It reminds me of my family.
You know, we've talked about it on the show before, Mary Lou, and for me, it's pop songs.
Oh, yeah.
See?
There's your primary track.
Like a song.
We know the song Precious and Few by Climax.
I know what room I was in, what cereal I was eating, what comic book I was reading.
And then I'll say, okay, Week weekend in New England, Barry Manilow.
I'll know there was an ice storm.
Those are the things that actually trigger for me.
Exactly.
That's your primary track and it's auditory.
Well, no big surprise.
Look at you guys have, you know, headsets on and you're doing something like a podcast
where you have to be a listener and a speaker.
But I guess that's true.
Yeah.
Do you think you inherited any of this?
Because I've heard you say with your mom
that she kind of knew that you were going to be,
she knew taxi was the right thing for you.
Yeah, she was dying at the time too.
She was in the hospital dying.
She knew that she wanted me to go and audition
and leave her bedside to go in and audition.
So she was intuitive.
She was intuitive,
but they didn't have the whole
memory thing. I see. It doesn't seem to be, even though my one son, he wants to be a comedy writer,
so if you know somebody, he wants to be in a room. He's brilliant. Graduated from Northwestern. We
know some people. Last year. No, last year he graduated from Northwestern with a minor in math
because he's so smart, but he's the head of his improv troupe.
He was in Meow, you know, the whole big Northwestern thing.
But he is an international bridge player.
And he plays bridge and started a bridge team at Northwestern.
They took the bronze.
Wow.
Then they took the gold.
But he plays with these women who hire him for lots of money.
And so he's writing a script called Bridge Gigolo because it's so,
that's how he feels. But it's funny. He's a brilliant bridge player. He's 23.
And your other son is a filmmaker.
Is a filmmaker and he's directing videos. He directed like most of the Ben Platt videos.
Oh, that's great.
And he's getting bit by other people.
Talented family.
Yeah.
I have one more taxi question.
Okay.
Ed Weinberger, well, we'll ask you about Andy later,
but Ed Weinberger was here and he told us that Stan Daniels
used to warm up the audience by singing Old Man River in Yiddish.
Did he?
I don't know that every week.
It was like, oh, here comes Stan.
We did have a combo, but, you know, like a little sort of,
they used to play like like, Brazilian music.
It was more like being on a cruise.
And then once in a while, Stan would get up there and do that.
But it wasn't like—that's funny.
I just would love to have seen it.
You know, when Reverend Jim—when Christopher Lloyd—I take—it's an episode called Elegant Iggy.
And I take him to a very high-class party because we end up getting tickets to something.
And we go and he goes to sit at the piano.
And I'm like, oh, my God, I can't believe he's doing this.
And he starts playing horribly.
And I'm so embarrassed.
And then all of a sudden he just starts playing the piano.
And it's, you know, classical music.
That was Stan who was really playing.
Wow.
Now, a story I heard recently.
This is when everyone shuts up and gets scared.
An important event in America and the world's history.
I know what you're going to say.
I'm already ahead of you.
Okay.
Okay.
All right.
Go ahead and say it.
Are you talking about Bob Costas?
Bob Costas.
Well, this has to do with the Moonlight.
Moonlight, yes, because Bob Costas asked me about it.
Because this was before 60 Minutes, so they were asking me about it.
Tell us the story.
Okay, so I'm with Bob Costas.
This is, you know, April 27th, 1980.
Anyway, and he came out here to shoot a bunch of shows.
And I was one of the last people.
And I'd been on his show before.
But we're talking, talking, talking.
And he said, I noticed in my notes something about you, you know,
that you have a very unusual memory.
Because I was telling people about it,
but nobody knew what I was talking about until the 60 Minutes thing.
So he said, where were you the night of the moonwalk?
And I said, he said, where were you the night the men landed on the moon?
And I was like, no, somebody told you that.
And he said, no, what?
And I went, no, come on.
And I was, you know, like, come on, baiting him sort of.
And he was baiting me.
And I said, well, I was in Chicago.
And he said, no, there's more of a story there.
And basically I told him, yeah, that's the night I lost my virginity standing up in a shower.
So he said.
July 20th.
July 20th, 1969.
He said, well, we know Neil Armstrong wasn't the culprit.
He wasn't the guy.
So that became, you know how Johnny Carson had his Ed Ames moment?
Oh, yeah, with the tomahawk.
We just talked about that tonight show with the tomahawk.
I became Bob Costas' Ed Ames a moment,
and he actually called me on the anniversary of the moonwalk this year.
Perfect.
Well, that's a good place in pop culture history.
Oh, people still write to me.
They call me.
They wish me happy anniversary. People tell me in val culture history. Oh, people still write to me. They call me. They wish me happy anniversary.
People tell me in, you know, valet parking, like, oh, I saw you on Bob Costas.
I always wanted to ask you about that.
Nice one, Gil.
Well, as long as we're talking about embarrassing moments, what happened with Sting on the Leno show?
Oh, my gosh.
That was May 13th, 1993.
Okay.
What day of the week?
It was a Thursday.
Okay.
That sounds good. I was. the week? It was a Thursday. Okay. That sounds good.
I was.
You can look up all these dates.
I was on with, okay, oh, yeah, because you just read the book.
Yeah.
So I was.
You opened the book with it.
You opened the book with that story.
Yeah.
I always loved Sting.
I always thought he was amazing.
And my son was just bid a job for Sting.
Isn't that something?
Oh.
That would be amazing.
Came full circle.
Yeah. So I was's full circle. Yeah.
So I was on the show.
I was so excited.
I said that I got more dressed up than I did for any of my weddings and everything else.
And so I was on the show with him.
And I just was, it was like a 13-year-old girl crawled through her TV set to meet her idol.
I was totally embarrassing.
I even said to Jay Leno, no, you shut up.
And I said,
I wish I could eat this cassette
so it was inside of me,
you know,
and I just said
so many ridiculous things
you have no idea.
I said,
you know your guest book?
I said,
you know the guest book?
I wanted to write
in one page,
but then I flipped it over
and I wrote,
please keep this book closed
so that Sting
is always on top of me,
you know?
I mean,
I'm crazy.
But I'm embarrassing myself on national television.
He was very charming and very sweet.
And then the next time I went to his concert,
I, of course, didn't go backstage,
but I was going into valet parking,
and they said, Sting wants to see you backstage.
And I was like, what?
So I went backstage, and he was so charming,
and he was so much fun.
And I said, oh, I'm so sorry.
He goes, no, no, no, that's okay.
The restraining order is over.
It's all right.
Oh, he had a sense of humor about it.
He had a sense of humor about it.
Oh, no, I was embarrassing.
That's nice.
I was like crazy.
I looked for the clip.
I was smelling him.
Couldn't find it.
Smelling him.
Now, doesn't Sting have that weird sexual—
Oh, the tantric yoga.
Oh, that's—oh, no, I told him I would, you know,
because the movie Indecent Proposal was popular that night,
that time, during that time when I was on the show in 93.
And I told him, I said, after reading the Rolling Stone article,
though, I'll give you two nights, you know.
So we were making jokes.
He was fine.
He was fine.
Because isn't that like, I always thought it was something like, you had sex, but you didn't come or something like that.
I don't know.
I think it's that you can prolong the sex.
Yeah, you can prolong.
I think people can have, I think the woman can have multiple orgasms and the guy's holding back or something.
And maybe you're doing it from across the room.
I don't know.
Because I've never been with him.
You liked going on The Tonight Show with Johnny, too.
Do you remember
how many times
you were on with Johnny?
It was great.
I was on a bunch of times with him
and a lot with Jay
because I know Jay a long time.
Yeah.
And one time,
I was on The Tonight Show
with Johnny
and Brian Regan ended up on
and he ended up
sitting down with us
because Bob Hope
was supposed to be on the show
and he couldn't make it
because there was a bomb scare wherever he was giving a speech. So he was not on. So I got three segments and
Brian came on. He did a set and then he sat down and we started, it was when I was trying to get
pregnant with my second husband. And so I told him that we had a little chart and that we were
like making notations and that we were trying to figure out, you know, and I said something about,
you know, it's funny.
I was like, I said to him, yeah, 15 times in February, a short month.
And he was like, 15 times?
I said, yeah, in February.
And he was like, I said, is that a lot?
He said, 15 times.
You know how Johnny always had that thing.
But that's nothing now.
I mean, my third and final husband, we have like five show weekends.
You know, we like.
Bless your heart.
We're like hot for each other.
That's good to hear.
PF is PF.
Yeah, that's good to hear.
Well, I bring that up too,
the Carson thing,
because as a kid,
it takes us back to your childhood
because as a kid,
you pretended to be-
I was.
Hosting a talk show
and talking into a hairbrush
like it was a microphone.
Yes, yes.
Can you do some of that for us now?
Are you guys married? I'm just curious. I'm married,
yes. Newly married. How long are you married? Only five years. Late in life. Oh, nice. Yeah,
I didn't get married till my 50s. Nice. Oh, that's good. Oh, it doesn't matter. Marriage.
I said this to the, do you know my brother, my brother and me? Do you know those guys? They're friends of Lin-Manuel Miranda's.
They're so much fun.
And they interviewed me on the red carpet.
And then I did their podcast.
And I told them that my family, that we have three theories of marriage.
So I'll tell you as well. Oh, yeah.
I want to hear them.
First one is marriage is like making waffles.
You throw the first one out.
But in your case, Frank, you don't have to worry about it because you got married so late.
I hope.
I definitely had a waffle.
Okay.
Second theory is marriage is finding that special certain someone you just know you'd love to aggravate the rest of your life.
Because it's like, eek, eek, eek, eek, eek.
And you want to get to them, right?
And the third one, Saint-Exupéry wrote it, but I added something to it. And that is, you'll have a happy marriage when you realize marriage isn't two people gazing longingly into each other's eyes,
but rather looking out over the mountain in the same direction.
Oh, that's profound.
With their hands on each other's genitals.
That's the part I added.
Because what you want is you want vision and heat.
Yes.
You got to have the heat.
You want vision and heat.
If you don't have both, it's not going to work.
It's not going to work.
You've got to have both.
This is interesting stuff.
One time I was talking to Henny Youngman.
That's a segue.
Who I'm sure you probably have a crush on.
No.
A little before my time, but yeah.
But he one time, this was years ago,
and he said to me, so, you married? And I, at the time, I wasn't. I said, no. And he goes,
what do you do for aggravation? That's right, right? Oh my gosh. Yeah, because, but that's
what's so great about marriage is that you break down the barriers of, you know, you wouldn't even
want to be with yourself as much as you are sometimes with your spouse.
So, of course, there are going to be issues.
And it's a 24-hour negotiation all the time.
The temperature when you're sleeping, who's got the covers, what kind of bed you have, pillows, just so many different things.
The quirks that we all have with one another.
It's hard, but it's worth it when it's great.
Well, third time seems like the charm for you.
Third time's the charm.
Oh, yeah.
Good.
Glad to hear that.
Yeah, it's nice.
It's great.
We have a great story and everything.
He was my college roommate's boyfriend, so it's, you know, she's not talking to me,
but we got together 16 and a half years ago and went through a big health crisis for him,
and everything's good now.
Everything's great.
Well, here's a funny thing from the book too.
You're talking about,
early in the book,
you're talking about heroes
like Marilyn Monroe
and Streisand
and Chita Rivera
and one of those people
was Shirley MacLaine
who you got to work with
in Cannonball Run 2.
Oh my gosh,
she was amazing.
And all those movie stars
that were in,
I mean,
that was like
the craziest experience,
Cannonball Run 2.
We shot it
in the dead of summer.
We had to get together at 2 o'clock in the morning for hair and makeup because it was 117 degrees.
And Dom DeLuise was in a nun's habit.
So that was not a good thing.
That was not a good thing.
Dom DeLuise, he's sort of like your love interest in the movie.
It's very disturbing.
You want to hear the story about that?
This is so funny.
It's very disturbing. So I work with Burt Reynolds on The Man Who Loved Women. And
the first day we meet, we have so much chemistry. We just adore one another. You know, when you meet
somebody and you just know you love that person and there's no like awkwardness or anything.
And Blake Edwards was so great. He let us ad-lib and we just had this incredible chemistry. Well,
that night he called me. He said, I want you to come down to my dinner theater. I want you to come down and I want
you to do, they're playing our song. Cause he knew I was on Broadway and sang and danced and stuff.
So I said, okay, done. He said, and I'm doing a new movie called, it's Cannonball Run 2. And I want
you to play this girl that Dom and I rescue. She's hiding out from her father.
She's in a sanitarium, and she ends up in the road with us.
I was like, great.
He said, but I need a rewrite of the script.
Do you know any writers?
I went, oh, my God, all the taxi guys, blah, blah, blah.
Anyway, Harvey Miller.
Did you know Harvey Miller?
Oh, sure, Harvey Miller.
Oh, my God, yes.
Terrific writer.
I read Medicine. I did with him.
So he, I get Harvey the job.
And what does he do?
He writes another female character.
And then Shirley MacLaine, because she had just come off of Terms of Endearment,
she wanted to do something where she looked hot.
So she ends up taking the job.
And, of course, she has to end up with Bert, and I end up with Dom.
It was very odd.
Harvey Miller!
But it's okay,
because I got to work with Bert five times.
He asked me to play his wife on Evening Shade.
I also did
a remake of
Alfred Hitchcock Presents
that Bert directed, and I played
opposite Marty Sheen, with Robbie Benson
was in it, and Parker Stevenson
and we shot that
on September 23rd,
1985.
Anyway,
Monday.
But so,
yeah,
so I got to work
with Burt five times
and that was great.
There's a guy
that we would have loved
to have on this show,
Burt Reynolds.
And I can't believe
he's gone.
I can't believe he's gone.
And especially his parents
lived well into their 90s,
both of them.
So you just thought
he was going to live forever.
I mean, it's just, it's shocking to me because we'd talk a few times a year and we adored one another.
That's nice.
And we never, people always said, oh, did you have a thing with Bert?
And I go, no, that's probably why I got to work with him so many times because, you know, we were always, you know, we never got together.
He never got enough credit.
He never had the ugly breakup with him
no
he never had to have
the ugly breakup
or have the
whatever current girlfriend
or wife he had
saying oh no
that's an ex-girlfriend
you know
which is usually
sometimes the case
often the case
he made so many
you know
audience pleasing films
and this has been said
before about him
I'm not
I'm not breaking news here
that he wasn't taken
seriously enough
as a dramatic actor.
If you see him in a movie called Breaking In.
In Deliverance.
Oh, my gosh.
What's one?
He's unbelievable in Deliverance.
Deliverance or Boogie Nights later in his career.
Boogie Nights.
A movie called Breaking In where he plays a safecracker.
Really, really terrific range.
I mean, he could do a lot.
He could do anything.
And the nicest person.
I mean, just so generous. Good comedian. So crazy. Oh, and comedian. Yeah. Really good comedian. He's a a lot. He could do anything. And the nicest person. I mean, you just, so generous.
So crazy.
Oh, and comedian.
Yeah, really good comedian.
But it's a wonderful director.
I mean, he put such a team together for Evening Shade,
and we just all, it was a real family,
and it was such a great experience to go from that,
from Taxi, which was five years,
take a little break, and then go into Evening Shade,
which was four years.
You know, it was just very special.
It never got its due though.
That was a real problem.
There were a lot of dramas
with network and whatever.
It's nice to have two shows
like that though
in one career.
I know.
Now I want my third.
Now that's my,
tell the universe
I want my third.
Now you've gotten greedy.
I'm going to do that.
Well, we talk,
we love character actors
on this show, Mary Lou,
if you've listened to it.
We've had a bunch in here.
We've had, you know,
Bruce Dern was here,
Griffin Dunn. Oh, Griffin. Oh my gosh, I love him so much. Mary Lou, if you've listened to it. We've had a bunch in here. We've had, you know, Bruce Dern was here, Griffin Dunn.
Oh, Griffin! Oh my gosh, I love
him so much. Yes, I know you've worked with him.
Oh my gosh, have you watched him on This Is Us?
I have. You see how incredible
he is as an actor, but so damn
funny. So, seriously,
Griffin Dunn and Ian McShane,
believe it or not, Deadwood,
Mr. Deadwood himself, hilarious.
And I think I know what actor you're going to mention.
I'm going to mention an actor she was in Evening Shade with.
Who would that actor be?
Now, would it be Elijah Cook Jr.?
No, he was in something else.
Oh, that was in Hammett.
That was in Hammett.
I did Hammett with Elijah Cook.
She was Charles Durning, I was going to mention.
Charles Durning.
He was terrific.
Let me tell you something.
At my wedding, I danced more with him than I did my husband or anybody else from the dancing school or any of my buddies.
He was a phenomenal dancer.
Such a great actor.
I heard.
So simple.
He had such a weird life.
Well, World War II hero.
Yes.
World War II.
Like Normandy or something.
He has a scar.
But he didn't talk about it.
And at one point, he was a dance instructor.
A dance instructor.
After the fucking, after being, fighting the Nazis.
I know.
At 17 or whatever.
He's a dance instructor.
And so brilliant.
He made it look effortless.
He and having Charlie Durning and Hal Holbrook, who played my dad, he was unbelievable.
And Ossie Davis, all of them.
All of them.
They were all just genius.
Michael Jeter.
Michael Jeter, my neighbor.
Liz Ashley.
Just show up and work with those people every day.
What a gift.
Oh, my gosh.
Well, everybody had a different way of working.
You know, everybody had—I mean, Taxi, most of the people were, like, you know, theater actors.
So everybody had sort of that kind of theater actor thing,
and we were shaping it all week.
With Evening Shade, everybody had a different style, you know,
film and television and stage.
It was great.
It was great.
And some people learned their lines immediately.
Some people didn't want to know them until the end.
And everybody had a different way.
It was like going to a master class every day.
I first met Charlie when I was auditioning for Tootsie because I auditioned for it at the time.
The script was one female rather than two females. And I was on a taxi and they brought me,
they brought me and I spent like the day with, I spent the day with Dustin Hoffman and we were
watching movies, film of his makeup test.
And did he look like a woman enough, et cetera, et cetera.
And Charlie Durning came in and he was doing makeup test things too.
And we met and instantly became like friendly.
And then I didn't get the part because I think Dustin Hoffman's mother got sick.
They changed, they went away for a while and they took the script and changed it.
And then they made it two women.
And I didn't even go back for it because of my taxi schedule.
And the two women who did it were ridiculous.
They were both so brilliant.
But I did get to work with Charlie Durning in a live production of Mr. Roberts.
Oh.
On NBC, and it was Robert Hayes and Howard Hesselman and Charlie and me
and Kevin Bacon, who was playing Ensign Pulver fresh off of Footloose.
Wow.
And he was great.
I got to find that.
And it was live.
I got to find that.
37 guys and me.
I had so much fun.
I remember.
I did see that.
I wonder if that's available.
Holy shit.
It probably is.
It was a live thing.
Yeah.
Did you interact with Dean and Sammy much on this?
Because you have a scene with them in Cannonball Run 2.
Here we are at the Arizona Inn in Tucson.
And as I told you, we're in hair and makeup at 2 o'clock in the morning because it was so damn hot.
They had to pull the plug at 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
So what were we going to do?
So everybody hung out at the pool.
Sammy Davis Jr., Dean Martin.
And Shirley MacLaine, you have to understand, she's like bringing a bright child to a wedding because she like runs around and jumps on everybody.
And it's so much fun to be with her and watch her interact with these guys. And I was like a
little kid in Chicago watching these people in movies. Of course. I'm like hanging out with these
movie stars. And everybody is so nice and so friendly and so special, especially because Shirley, they adore her. She is their girl,
you know? And so I was just like along for the ride and everybody was so nice.
So now Frank comes and he comes on a day, Frank Sinatra comes on a day when there's 32 wagon,
imagine 32 trailers in the desert. Everybody's got their own trailer. It looked like a wagon train.
It was crazy.
He was actually there only one day.
But Dean and Sammy hanging out with Shirley, that was like a whole week.
It's got to be surreal.
Listen to this.
It was surreal.
It was surreal.
They don't seem like real people.
I know.
I know.
They seem like guys from posters and Vegas movies and things.
I mean, it was just, it was mind-boggling to me.
I'll tell you a funny Frank Sinatra story.
Okay.
So I am on Broadway, my very first Broadway show.
I'm 21 years old.
I'm so excited.
I'm working with the Andrews sisters.
Oh, and over here.
Oh, man.
And over here.
Right.
And Anne Reinking.
Treat Williams.
And Treat Williams plays my boyfriend.
And the two of us never stop kissing because our characters are madly in love with each other.
And we're always kissing on stage. And Johnny Travolta, he's playing this little
misfit type character. So we're going to perform for the Jerry Lewis Telethon. We're going to do
a number for the Jerry Lewis Telethon. And the soundstage is at, you know how they always have
the big stage with all the people at phones? Oh yeah, the phone banks.
And the performers come in. Right, the phone banks.
Okay, so now we're all there, and we're doing our number,
we're rehearsing, because we have to do it in between shows on Saturday,
and we're going to film our bit.
So I have to go to the bathroom, and I say, oh, can I go?
They say, okay, well, go up this elevator, but be very careful, you know, blah, blah, blah.
So I go up the elevator, I find the bathroom. I come down.
I press a button.
I open the doors, and there's nobody there.
It's the entire set, and there is not one human being there.
And I'm saying, hello, hello, hello.
And I'm thinking, like, what happened?
Everybody just disappears like Brigadoon or something.
It's like crazy.
They're gone.
All of a sudden, this guy comes up to me.
He says, oh, you're not supposed to be here.
And I said, I was just here.
What happened?
He goes, no, no, no.
This is a duplicate set on a different floor
for when Frank Sinatra comes.
Oh, my God.
He has his own complete setup for when he performs.
The entire set is on another floor from where we were.
Isn't that crazy?
That's insane.
Wow.
That was my intro to him.
But you know, that cast, it's like a fever dream.
Don Knotts, Sid Caesar, Ricardo Montalban,
Dub Taylor, Jamie Farr, we had him here.
Tony Danza.
Tony Danza had to work with the orangutans.
The orangutans.
And how about the guys?
How about all the guys from The Godfather?
They brought in Abe Vigoda, Alex Rocco.
Yeah, all of them.
Michael Vigazzo, Frankie Five Angels.
Yeah, all of them.
Now, that's the one I think Alex Rocco is.
Yeah.
Charles Nelson Reilly.
Yeah, he's in it, too.
Well, he's in it, too.
Yes.
Artie Johnson.
There's a scene with Alex Rocco and Charles Nelson Reilly.
That's who Burt was.
He was able to just galvanize people.
He got them all on board.
Everybody loved him and wanted to do whatever he asked them to do.
You know, the movie wasn't good, but we had a blast.
I mean, just to see a cast assembled like that.
I know.
You don't even see that anymore.
Well, it's like those old-time movies. Yeah, like it's a Mad, Mad that. I know. You don't even see that anymore. Well, it's like
those old time
media speeds
Yeah, like it's a
Mad Mad World
kind of thing.
You couldn't afford
anybody now.
Everybody would have
points and, you know,
whatever.
You just touched on
something.
I'm sorry to interrupt,
Mary Lou.
Go ahead.
You started to touch
on something interesting.
You were saying
the movie wasn't very good
but we had a great time
and that's something
that's almost
a recurring theme
in your interviews that you keep saying I had a great time. And that's something that's almost a recurring theme in your interviews, that you keep saying,
I had a wonderful time on this movie, didn't turn out to be a good movie.
And you almost made a connection between those two things.
The better the time you had, the more, like Johnny Dangerously.
Johnny Dangerously, oh my gosh.
What's funny is that's like a cult classic now.
Yeah, people love it.
We shot it twice.
We shot it, then they wanted to tweak it,
so then we shot a lot of scenes and changed the ending and blah, blah, blah.
I mean, Amy Heckerling, I am a huge fan of hers.
I've worked with her more than once, and she's just remarkable.
Yeah, I worked with her.
You worked with him?
Look who's talking, too.
Yeah, we had Amy here.
She's so great.
Amy's terrific.
She's great.
So she created
for Johnny Dangerously
this like playground
for the actors.
And when the guys were,
I always say this,
you know you had
a great time
shooting a movie
when the wrap party
is 24 hours long
and the director
shows up
wearing a dog collar.
You know, it was so wild and so punk and funny and just created this environment.
The guys wore more makeup than we did.
We all loved one another.
We spent a lot of time getting ready because there was a certain look to the show.
But people love that movie now.
Yes, it's got a following.
And it didn't do well when it came out.
Love that movie now.
Yes, it's got a following. And it didn't do well when it came out.
But I've heard other actors and directors say that,
that the more fun they had doing something, the worse it came out.
Yeah, maybe.
I mean, there are some movies I've done that weren't fun and didn't come out well.
Other movies that, you know, it was fun.
Well, it was fun to work with, and I think it's a great movie.
Maybe some other people weren't as good as they could have been.
L.A. Story.
Oh, yeah.
I love Steve Martin so much.
Very good.
And I love that movie.
And that movie holds up because you watch it, and it really, you know.
That's one that turned out well.
I remember you guys shooting people on the freeway.
Oh, yeah.
It's an open season on the freeway.
Yeah.
Like, I don't think you could do that now.
It's sort of crossed the line.
But I heard you say there are a couple of movies.
You said it about Johnny Dangerously.
You also said it about Rustler's Rhapsody.
Yes.
Had a great time.
So, of course, the movie didn't work out.
Oh, my gosh.
No, you know what?
That, it was a Western, like a takeoff on Spaghetti Westerns.
And it was with Tom Berringer and Cee LaWard.
Andy Griffith, of all people.
Yeah, G.W. Bailey.
So many great people.
And we were in Spain, in Almeria, and in Madrid shooting.
And three-hour lunches where everybody, not me, but some of the people are getting drunk.
The afternoon, it went from being a fast-paced comedy to being like an homage.
You know what I mean?
It's just everything got slowed down from the perno and the sangria and the red wine and a lot of drinking on that set.
Interesting.
What about Noises Off, another legendary cast?
Oh, my gosh.
Michael Caine, Carol Burnett, John Ritter, Christopher Reeve.
John Ritter, Christopher Reeve.
The great Dan O'Melliot.
Dan O'Melliot.
Yeah, all of them.
Well, we rehearsed that as a play first, and we learned it as a play,
and then we shot it as a movie because it was just like, you know,
it was like the game Mousetrap or something.
It was like a Swiss watch because it just fits together so well.
That was a blast.
And, you know, you better have loved your costume
because you were in it through the entire thing.
One costume. Nobody is in anything but the one costume. Do you like doing farce like that? Again, the entire thing. One costume.
Nobody is in anything but the one costume.
Do you like doing farce like that?
Again, I watched it.
I do.
I watched it last week and there's a million things.
Oh, look at you.
A lot of physical actors too.
Marklin Baker, a very, very physical actor.
Great.
But you know what?
John Ritter.
Also, I don't want to leave him out, but you know, somebody's getting their leg bitten
as they're running up a ladder and you're hitting Christopher Reeve in the head with
a vase.
Oh.
It looks like fun to make.
It was so much fun.
It was so much fun.
Yeah.
It was really, it was intense.
It was a very intense production.
And there were some behind the scenes things that I shouldn't talk about because they didn't involve me.
But yeah, it was fun.
Both you and Gilbert got to work for Bogdanovich.
Oh, yes. I got to work with. work for Bogdanovich. Oh, yes.
I got to work with...
What did you do with him?
Oh, God.
One thing he doesn't like talking about.
Uh-oh.
What was it?
He directed the last movie that Richard Pryor and Gene Wilder did.
It was called Another You.
And I was in it.
And somewhere in the middle of this production, Peter Bogdanovich was fired.
Oh.
And then they told me they were moving me and some other people from the movie, scraping
old previously shot footage.
What?
And then they got a new director.
And it was a dismal failure.
So it never came out.
Did it come out?
It came out.
But without you.
Yeah.
You're better off.
Yeah.
You're much better off.
Oh, it was horrible.
Richard Pryor.
Peter became a friend.
What?
And he's a talker. You could get him here. Who's that? Peter Bogdanovich. Oh, we was horrible. Richard Pryor. Peter became a friend. What?
He's a talker.
You could get him here. Who's that?
Peter Bogdanovich.
Oh, we had him.
Oh, we did.
We did a great episode with him.
Oh, my gosh.
We could do five episodes with him.
He's a character.
Oh, easily.
He's a character.
Yeah.
He's a character.
I love him, though.
We really became friends from that.
Yeah.
You work with some great directors.
You work with some significant directors.
Robert Mulligan. Robert Mulligan. He was fantastic You work with some significant directors. Robert Mulligan.
Robert Mulligan,
he was fantastic
to work with.
And Blake.
And Blake Edwards.
Blake was like my fave.
I mean, unbelievable.
Yeah, and Joan Micklin-Silver,
the first thing I ever did
was a film called
Between the Lines.
I don't know if you guys
ever saw it.
Talk about another cast.
It was everybody from,
you know,
Jeff Goldblum
and Lindsey Krauss
and John Hurd and Steve Collins and Gwen Wells and Bruno Kirby.
You know, a lot of the people who were like these young talents at the time, Luce J. Stadlin, and then all of a sudden some of them were gone.
Some of them are gone for other reasons.
Yeah, yeah.
Jeff Goldblum.
And now I just, just so I don't leave it out, I worked with John Ritter in two movies.
Oh, you did?
Problem Child and Problem Child 2.
He was amazing.
He was really nice.
Oh, so nice.
So nice.
So talented.
So talented.
I was shocked when he passed away.
I mean, that was just—
Everyone.
You just couldn't believe it.
You just couldn't believe it because he was so vital and so, you know. I mean, that was just— Everyone. You just couldn't believe it. You just couldn't believe it because he was so vital and so, you know.
I mean, his comedy timing.
I mean, if you ever watch Noises Off again, watch how he falls down the stairs.
It's great.
That was not a stunt double.
He actually fell down the stairs and gets up and, you know.
Oh, he was incredible.
He was a great physical comic.
Yeah.
He's good in that Edwards movie, Skin Deep.
Yes.
He's good in everything. I mean, he's
just so good. And he worked with Peter Bogdanovich
a bunch as well.
They all laughed. They all laughed. I like.
What are your memories of George C.
Scott when you made the Titanic? Oh,
so sweet. Oh my gosh. He was good to you?
Well, that was directed by my then husband.
Robert Lieberman. I just had my son
Joey like six months
before, or a few months before
and he was so
I was so excited
to work with him
and with Eva Marie Saints
Eva Marie Saints in it too
oh my gosh
she was fantastic
and we were just talking
about all the stories
about Brando
and everything else
and he was so
I had auditioned for him
but I was too young
for the part
when he did
Death of a Salesman
at Circle in the Square
and so remember the woman that he's cheating with and stuff?
Well, he was like 22.
I saw that.
You did?
I saw that.
Wow.
Yes.
But he was great.
Yeah, I saw it too.
He was unbelievable.
And you just know you feel bad if you do any overacting.
And, you know, I've got such a big personality, and I move so much.
And I always feel like when I calm it all down, I can sometimes look just like I'm constipated on film.
Because I look like I'm trying to contain myself or something.
I sometimes have to, it takes me a while to adjust to film work again.
Because I love the stage and I love being big.
I worked on Broadway last year in another musical.
And I just love being big. I worked on Broadway last year in another musical, and I just love that feeling.
But with George C. Scott, he's so intimate and so just looks at you
that he really makes you better than you are by far.
He's great.
He was great.
What people you've worked with.
I know.
I'm lucky.
Well, yeah, I've been in the business a long time,
and I'm still working.
So it's nice to – and it's fun to reminisce about people.
Even the Andrews sisters, as we mentioned.
Yes.
We have a question from your friend and our friend, Emily, Penn Jillette's wife.
Oh, I love her so much.
This was handed to me by Dara.
Ask Mary Lou about the sign in getting the band back together.
In getting the band back together.
First of all, Emily came to see the show twice.
Wait, is this on live?
No.
No, how does she know?
Oh, you just, okay.
She just handed this to me from the booth.
Okay.
So, Emily, there's a for sale sign in front of our house.
Our house is being foreclosed.
My son, who is a rocker, who lost his job on Wall Street, an ex-rocker in high school,
comes back to live with me in New Jersey.
I used to be a groupie and hang out with all these guys,
but I'm a piano teacher now.
And so our house is being foreclosed.
And in order to avoid foreclosure,
he and his arch rival from high school
have to do a battle of the bands.
So I'm like all excited.
My big number is called,
What Would Joe Perry Do?
Because Joe was like a big lover of mine and stuff like that as the bands. So I'm like all excited. My big number is called What Would Joe Perry Do? Because Joe was like
a big lover of mine
and stuff like that
as the character.
Anyway,
so our foreclosure sign,
it's up there
and it's like,
you know,
for sale and everything else.
So Emily saw the show.
She said,
they are missing a joke.
You should have,
call 867-5309.
You know,
like that.
Oh, Tommy Two-Tone.
867-5309.
So they put it on there
and people always laughed
so when the show
broke down
I got the sign
and I sent it to Emily
so she's now got it
in her
perfect
rec room or something
perfect
yeah
Emily got
Emily got her shout out
I'm holding up the
oh I love her
Emily Gillette
she and I really bonded
while I was doing
Celebrity Apprentice
because Hurricane Sandy
was going on when we were doing it.
And so everybody was—we had to stop production for a few days.
And all the people who came in to visit their spouses or whatever, they came in town.
And then they had to stick around for the whole week.
Mary Lou, were you the Ponderosa Steakhouse girl?
I was.
I can still sing it.
It's Tuesday—it's family night at Ponderosa. Every Tuesday
night at Ponderosa. Bring the whole family for a ribeye steak, baked potato, tasty salad.
So come and get square meal, square deal. Square meal, square deal at Ponderosa. Do you know how
much money I made for that commercial? Because I was the girl who like hit the cash register.
Oh, you know what?
I'm doing my club act.
I do a club act.
I'm doing it at 54 Below on March the 4th of 2020.
Oh.
And I do this whole thing about how I did 72 commercials when I lived in New York.
Like two and a half years.
And one of the things I did is I was a body parts model.
So I did four Playtex bra commercials.
It's got sash, sheer, and seamless support. four Playtex bra commercials. It's got sash
sheer and seamless support, two Playtex panties, super look sheer, super look sheer, where all you
saw was my butt and my crotch, walking my dog, walking around Lincoln Center, getting on a bus,
bowling. I was also the fruit of the loom pantyhose girl inside of a giant apple with just my legs sticking out.
I called my mother and said, Mom, I just spent 18 hours on my back inside of a giant apple.
She said, oh, Mary, please tell me you're still in show business.
Hilarious.
Do you know Beverly D'Angelo?
Yes, I do.
She was, I think, the Ponderosa Steakhouse girl.
Oh, she did it too?
I think you have that in common.
We have that in common.
So you're a vegetarian working for the Ponderosas.
I gave up dairy on August 15th, 1979.
And what else were you doing that day?
Oh, you know what I was doing?
I thought, okay.
I remember what I was doing.
I thought I better go to the health food store.
So I went to Air One, which was on Beverly at the time.
It's still on Beverly, but further down.
And I ran into Jeff Goldblum, whom I knew from Between the Lines.
There you go.
And he was already into health food.
And he walked me around and just showed me how to buy bulk flour and healthy foods.
I love it.
You know, yeah.
So that was the day.
Were you also the Samsonite luggage girl?
Samsonite luggage.
I love saving in the springtime.
Samsonite savings time for me.
I love saving.
You're making me do my clawback.
And I do this head to toe salute to your body,
starting with wash that man right out of my hair
and ending with Footloose.
And then I do like a little recap of all of them.
We have to come see you at 54 Below.
Oh, it's great.
Yeah.
I'm going to do it here too, but I definitely have the 54 Below.
I can't find the date.
I'm not sure what dates I'm doing it here.
Well, Footloose.
So much fun.
I have to hear Footloose now.
Oh, no.
No.
What I do is I go through, you know, wash that man right out and like do little snippets
of 22 songs.
And then I go, everybody, everybody, you know, Wash That Man Right and like do little snippets of 22 songs. And then I go, everybody
everybody
you know. Caught footloose.
Yeah, footloose. And so I go
everybody talk. Now let's review.
I wash my hair out of my head. Head of brain.
Read my mind. Take my eyes. Cheek to cheek. Lips of wine.
Heaven knows. Happy face. Redneck gal. Shoulder
high. In my arms. You're so vain. Slow hand.
Gold finger. Gotta have heart.
Tits and ass. Yummy tummy. Baby got back.
She's got legs. Swan knee. How I love you.
How I love you. Loose. Foot loose.
Everybody cut. Everybody cut.
So I do this whole thing. It stops the show.
So much fun. So I do comedy.
I tell stories about my family.
About my three husbands.
About being on Dancing with the Stars.
This sounds great. It's really fun.
This sounds great. We'll have to come. We'll have to make a pilgrimage when you're here.
You'll have to come.
Yeah, for sure.
Before we let you get out of here and get away from us,
Richard Kind, who was a friend of this show.
I have to tell a great Richard Kind story.
Go ahead.
I wrote to him and I said, Mary Lou's coming.
And he wrote me back.
He said, she's a wonderful soul, funny, kind, and observant. And best part is I got to kiss her for five months. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He
slobbered all over me. Believe me. I know. He's a great kisser. We had so much fun,
but let me tell you a funny Richard Kind story. So it was Tale of the Allergist's Wife. We're
doing it on Broadway. Rhea Perlman plays this woman who's going through a big
depression. She's married to Richard Kind. He's an allergist. She finds like, oh, my analyst died,
and she's going through this whole thing, but it's a comedy. And into their life walks this
character, my character, that used to know the wife, and I'm sort of like the cat in the hat
comes back. I come into their lives, and I just wreak havoc on their relationship
and everything else.
We end up having a three-way.
I mean, it's really funny.
But his first entrance, he's supposed to come in jogging and on the phone.
He's been jogging around, and he walks, and he comes in,
and his wife is lying on the sofa, and she's depressed,
and he's like, oh, he opens the windows and tries to get her roused
a bit anyway all of a sudden I'm in my dressing room and I'm hearing the cue for Richard to come
in and he's not in and he's not in and and Rhea Perlman and the other character they are just
ad-libbing up a storm all of a sudden I hear running down the stairs, Richard, right? He has scooped up all of his
props and he walks on stage and says, can you believe I was mugged not two blocks from here?
Because he has nothing on that he's supposed to have on. So it's like he got mugged and people
took his clothes and they took his fanny pack. Oh my God. It was so crazy. Nobody, you know,
we couldn't like, it was like the craziest thing.
Oh, that's a great story.
And you know what else?
He's a great charades player.
My family is obsessed with games.
We do a big game night every Christmas, and we've sent somebody to the emergency room because we got so vicious, and that's why we never do Boys Against the Girls anymore.
My God.
No, seriously.
Seriously, on Christmas night years ago, it was boys against girls.
One sister is pointing her finger in the other sister's boyfriend's face.
He grabs her hand and twists it back.
Her husband jumps on him.
The two of them start beating each other up. Oh, my God.
And people are still guessing.
I'm not kidding you.
They were going like raging bull.
You know, they're naming off all the—
Oh, my God.
We got to hang out with her.
Somebody out there likes me.
So that was crazy.
But Richard is the greatest charades player of all times.
We invited him to game night one summer, and he was fantastic.
We adore the guy, and he's become a friend of this show.
Yeah.
And helps us book the show, and he's been an angel.
Oh, I'll help you, too, because I love you guys.
You're very sweet.
Before you run away, give us your impressions.
We promise the audience. Give us your impressions we promise the audience give us your
give us your impressions
of Andy
your memories
oh well
I've told a lot
of these memories
but one of the things
people
I did not like
Man on the Moon
I didn't think Jim
having seen the documentary
and Jim's a great guy
and a great actor
but I thought
this isn't the Andy
I knew
but I thought
maybe he's pandering to a certain audience, whatever, and I knew, having seen the Jim and Andy documentary
so many years later, I realized it was fascinating, and especially then I thought, oh, that's
where that character came from.
You know what I mean?
Because it didn't seem like it was Andy.
It seems like Jim was working out.
They captured the manic aspects of him, but not the sweetness?
Yeah, not the sweetness at all. I mean, he was working out. They captured the manic aspects of him but not the sweetness? Yeah, not the sweetness
at all.
I mean, he was so sweet.
Andy was so sweet
he could sit and have
a normal conversation
with you
and then go up
and do the craziest things
that you could possibly imagine.
You know,
he fancied himself
a song and dance man
so we were always
like dancing
and singing.
He was fascinated
by the Andrews sisters
which is why the guys ended up for one of the shows that we did, a costume party thing. And he, he and Tony
and Judd dressed like the Andrew sisters. So I taught them like a little number to go with it.
And it, you know, he was so, he was dear and he was dear and then he was nuts. You know,
the whole thing I, I, I, you know, I've said before, Judd and I were in New York doing publicity, our first Thanksgiving break on Taxi.
And we went down to the public theater to see a show.
And all of a sudden, we walk out in the middle of the night practically.
And I said, is that Andy panhandling?
Here he is in the Bowery, which was not safe then, panhandling because he wanted the experience.
You know, he worked at Jerry's Famous Deli.
I remember that.
He had bus tables, yeah.
Yeah, he bussed tables because he wanted to get out there among the people.
He was such a performance artist way ahead of his time.
I mean, Andy died in 1984.
That's a long time ago.
That's 35 years ago, you know.
And my boys, who are 23 and 25, 24 and 25 now, Joey just turned
24. He, they know him. They know his work because of YouTube, because of Taxi, of course, but,
you know, this whole, there's a young generation that really studies him and he's like the original,
you know, and yet he was this like sweet guy from Great Neck who could sit and have a conversation with you
and be dear
I miss him, I really miss him
he wanted to get really healthy toward the end of his life
and when we went off the air
and I saw him a couple of months later
I could not believe him, I could not believe what he looked like
he was skin and bones, he was just so sick looking.
And people think like, oh, is it, you know, was it a joke that he's going to come back someday?
He's going to do this.
It's Tony Clifton and everything else.
But you knew he was sick.
I mean, he was definitely sick.
I saw him a month before he died.
I'm sorry.
Yeah, he's a great guy.
A comet, you know, one of those talents
that just sort of,
he streaks across the sky
and then he's gone.
The first time I saw him,
I was at the comedy store
in New York
and I was doing
the Broadway show Grease.
This is way before Taxi
and we're at the comedy store
and this guy gets up,
you know,
with the little suit
and the foreign man accent
and starts reading from The Great Gatsby. So, of course, you're like, ha, ha, ha,
this is funny. And by the time he gets to the second chapter, everybody's like throwing dinner
rolls and straws and making airplanes out of napkins. And it's like, boo, boo, getting off.
And he was just, you know, he kept going and going and the crowd was getting hostile. And then all of a sudden, he started crying, and you were like,
like you couldn't believe you have a man crying on stage.
And it was like, oh, my God, this, like, sweet foreign guy is crying.
And then he turns upstage, and in one swoop,
yanks off tape that's on the side of his pants, revealing studs,
and flips his hair like Elvis, and turns around,
and does the greatest
Elvis impression ever. And the audience goes crazy, you know. Wow. It was a great Elvis impression.
It was a great Elvis. And in fact, when I, the taxi auditions were interesting. My mom, as you
know, she was dying in the hospital and she had this sense that I would get the job. And two weeks
after she passed, I did get the job. But my last audition, they paired us up with people,
and Andy wasn't there, but they told me that he was in one of the groups
that they were pairing up, and I thought, this guy's going to get the job.
He's got to get it, because nobody else that I had seen that day
could come close to what I had seen at the comedy store.
You saw him at the clubs, didn't you, Gil?
Did you ever see him?
Yeah, yeah.
He used to come into the Improv and Catch in New York.
And I also would go out to LA.
I mean, I said the comedy store.
I meant the Improv, the one that was in Midtown.
Yeah, Improv.
I remember watching him.
And a similar story.
He started singing a hundred bottles of beer on the wall.
Right, right, right.
At first you laugh because you go, oh, well, he's not going to sing the whole thing.
That's the joke.
And he sings the entire hundred bottles of beer on the wall.
And the audience is screaming at him to get off.
It was so funny.
I know.
He was amazing.
You know who else was really amazing
that I ended up doing the Letterman show with?
And I had never seen anything like him in my life.
And we, people, you know, watch me on the show
and they'd say, oh yeah, you were fine.
But this guy, and it was Sam Kinison.
Oh my gosh.
Did you know his work at all?
Oh yeah, yeah. Wow. He was something. That scream and stuff. this guy and it was Sam Kinison oh my gosh did you know his work at all oh yeah yeah wow he was
something that scream that scream and and stuff I mean it's you know it takes so long for somebody
to really create a persona and be that comedian I know that's I think being a comedian is the
hardest part of of any job that we do in show business it It's just so intimidating. And so, you know, it's awe-inspiring.
So you're even more attracted to Gilbert now.
Yes, I am.
I'm a comedian, Jewish comedians.
No, I'm sorry.
Tell Larry David he's still number one in my books.
He's still my road not taken.
Mary Lou, what's happening now?
You're on the Chuck Lorre show.
Yeah, and also I'm doing like,
I do a whole series on Hallmark, which I love doing.
It's so much fun.
It's called the Aurora Tea Garden Mystery Series.
And it's with Candice Cameron Bure, who's just fabulous.
I play her mom.
And the two of us get along so well.
And we go up to Canada.
And we're shooting four more episodes, not episodes, movies, 13, 14, 15, and 16.
We're doing at least five more, which is so much fun.
So I'm busy with that.
I'm doing my club act all over the country.
I'm writing another book.
What's the name of the club act?
The club act is A Memorable Evening with Mary Lou Henner.
Perfect.
People shout dates.
It's really fun.
You guys have to come and see it.
We will come and see you when you're at 54 Below.
And another book.
Yeah, and another book.
I'm not allowed to talk about the book yet,
but it'll be my 11th,
and I'm very excited about this one.
So I'm doing that.
And I go all over the country speaking about memory,
about cancer,
because my husband's a cancer survivor,
and we have quite a story
because we got together 16 years,
16 and a half years ago,
and he was diagnosed two months into our relationship.
And I said, failure's not an option.
You're the love of my life. And he put two cancers, two our relationship. And I said, failure is not an option. You're the love of my life.
And he put two cancers, two primary site cancers in remission.
No chemo, no radiation.
Didn't have to have surgery on his bladder or anything.
So we had a whole story too.
So yeah, it's like a busy time.
And I'm helping my brother with his two little kids.
And my boys are around.
And my family's coming for the holidays.
So it's a good life.
It's a full life.
Yeah.
We could talk to you for hours and hours.
Oh, thank you.
Hours and hours.
I have cards I didn't even get to.
I talk a little faster than Treat.
She thought Treat didn't talk fast.
Oh, did you think?
Oh, my gosh.
Did I say something?
No, you thought.
I have to tease him about that.
You'll tease him.
Well, he gets, you know, he gets like very intense.
And he tells a story like, you know,
and it's like, okay, I'm putting you up to one and a half.
But I probably talk too fast because that's how I talk.
It's big family stuff.
And before we totally wrap up,
let me remind you one more time that I'm a Jew.
Okay.
Not just a Jew, a neurotic self-obsessed yes smart yes funny yes yes i know keep talking okay short isn't that wasn't that one thing
yes good laugh okay may 1st 1971 is my wife my's birthday. Oh, that's your wife's birthday?
Yes.
That's when her birthday is?
Yes, Genevieve.
May 1st.
It was a Saturday.
Damn it.
Amazing.
I know what I was doing, yes.
You know what you were doing?
On top of it.
I always remember everything.
I remember all that I was doing.
What a gift.
What happens is that I see the year, and it, like, goes,
and it just, like, focuses on the day and what day of the week it falls on.
Dara, what's your anniversary?
She's on a mic.
Oh, that was a Saturday.
Oh, Jesus Christ.
Oh, well, you said marriage.
Well, you know, when I went to lunch with Leslie Stahl and her producer,
because she was like, I'm not doing this story.
Mary Lou's got the same memory.
Her producer, Sherry Finkelstein, she was talking to me.
She was like, well, when did you meet Leslie?
Well, when did this?
I'm giving him dates.
And then Sherry tells me, oh, yeah, I got married June 15th, 1998.
And I said, oh, really?
That's so odd. Why did you get married on a Monday? And she said, oh my God, she has it.
It's a great, it's a great parlor trick in addition to being a gift.
It's not a parlor trick. People always say, the questions people always ask me are,
is it a blessing or a curse? And I always say it's a blessing for me, a curse for my husband because it bugs him because I'm always correcting him.
And, you know, that's why I'm on my third and final, we hope.
And then people always ask me about the bad memories.
And I always say I remember the bad memories just like you do because memory is tied to adrenaline.
But I can bring back all those little sweet Our Town memories in the middle.
So it's a gift.
It's impressive.
Thank you.
You know, I think you're our first guest who brings her own research to the interview.
Yeah, he just read my damn first book.
Excuse me.
That's 25 years ago, another kid and another husband later.
Well, my wife has the other books, but they're about health and diet.
Yeah, I know.
That's not our motif.
You don't have to study up on you.
You just go, July 9th, and you'll start talking.
Give me a year, July 9th, avoid year.
I don't know when I've been more entertained by a guest, Mary Luke.
Oh, really?
That's so nice.
Thank you.
Thank you so much. Thank you.
Thank you so much.
You guys are great.
I was so excited listening to both Phil and Treat and other people.
So it's like I couldn't wait to come here.
And, you know, I came here a month ago.
They gave me the wrong date.
They said, you know, it doesn't matter.
But then I said, nobody is here in this studio.
You came all the way there and nobody was there?
I came on a Saturday.
Oh, wow.
I don't know how that happened. It, wow. My God, I don't know
how that happened.
It's okay.
We apologize.
I knew where to find you guys.
And this is cool
because does your audience know
that we're looking
at each other on Skype?
Because you guys laugh more,
I think,
when the person's in the room,
maybe.
I don't know.
But we've certainly laughed
a lot today.
Well, I'll tell you.
I'll say this for you.
I mean,
most of the Skype episodes
are a little harder
to create intimacy, but not this one. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, that's nice. That's a nice compliment. Well, I'll tell you, I'll say this for you. I mean, most of the Skype episodes are a little harder to create intimacy, but not this one.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Oh, that's nice.
That's a nice compliment.
So it is like you leap through the screen.
Oh, thank you.
Well, look how cute Gilbert and I are.
We both took our glasses off to look more attractive.
Am I right?
Absolutely.
We'll see.
You caught me.
I did.
So you did it, so then I did it.
We'll see you at 54 Below.
Thanks a lot.
Thanks a lot.
You don't take your glasses off?
I got it.
I can't see if I take them off.
If I take them off, you'd be Marsha Mason.
So tonight I'll call up Larry David and tell him.
Tell him.
Yes, he definitely fucked up that tape
oh no
tell him I still
have his letter
tell him I still
have his letter
it was so cute
oh he was darling
I mean
that was really
my road not taken
unfortunately
because I would have
really
he and I would have
really gotten along
I know that
so
well we look forward
to meeting you
in 2020
excuse me
Larry David
creates this Broadway
show that he's in,
and he writes this character,
and then he doesn't cast me in it.
She's got this amazing memory,
and he casts somebody else.
Oh, Jesus.
So fuck him, then.
So fuck him.
And this has been Gilbert Gottfried's
amazing, colossal podcast
with my co-host, Frank Santopadre, and the guest who gets truly annoying with her memories.
See, we didn't even have to get married for you to feel the same way as my husband.
We just know each other for an hour, and I'm already sick of you.
And we didn't even talk about some things.
But that's okay.
But she is a Jew groupie.
I'm a Jew groupie.
From way back.
Way back.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Only John didn't have the beard, you know.
The apostle.
The very lovely Mary Lou Hanna.
Thank you, Mary Lou.anna thank you Mary Lou thanks guys
thanks for doing
all the research
this is one for the ages
on one book
of course
it was a pleasure
okay
we'll see you
we'll see you in
see you at 54 below
March 4th
you got it
the only imperative command
in the entire calendar
March 4th
that's correct
that's how you remember
very good
why were you doing
March 4th
um
1979 March 4th. That's correct. That's how you'll remember. Why were you doing March 4th, 1979?
March 4th, 1979 was a Sunday.
Oh, I know what I was doing.
Oh, yeah.
Okay.
I was.
You can look it up.
We believe you.
Someone can fact check all these.
You're so good.
I checked them before I gave them to you.
Oh, you did?
Yeah.
Oh, you did. Yeah. Oh, you did?
Yeah.
Yeah, March 4th, 1979.
Incredible.
Sunday.
Yeah.
Thanks, Mary Lou.
Thanks.
I had Thai food.
Okay.
Over my undies trimmed in lace
I'll slip on my black silk disgrace
Cut so low they'll raid the place
I wanna dress dangerously
I need to be reckless, I need to be daring
I need to take chances and tempt my fate
I need to be foolish, need to be crazy
Before it's too late and I'm out of date.
I'll feed you sizzling steak and bootleg gin and chocolate cake till it's a sin.
We'll work it off and keep you thin. I want to eat dangerously.
Sizzling.
Cheers.
I want to eat dangerously.
I need to be reckless.
I need to be daring.
I need to take chances and tempt my fate.
I need to be foolish, need to be crazy before it's too late and I'm out of place.
I'm just a slave to my desire and not afraid to play with fire
I'll pay it off, ma'am, and get it high
I wanna live dangerously
I wanna eat dangerously
I wanna love
DangerouslyGANGER LESSONS