Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - Mini #129: Time Travel Movies with Richard Kind
Episode Date: September 14, 2017This week: Whit Bissell! The beauty of Yvette Mimieux! The genius of Nicholas Meyer! Richard praises "It's a Wonderful Life"! And "the Professor" meets John Wilkes Booth! Learn more about your ad choi...ces. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Here we go boys.
1, 2, 3, 4 Hi, this is Gilbert Gottfried, Amazing Colossal Obsessions.
And we're once again recording at Nutmeg with our engineer, Frank Bertarosa.
And our return guest is actor Richard Kine.
Colossal Obsessions.
You missed my credits last time.
I'm ready.
Now, Richard is a super...
Everybody's just going, oh, God, him.
What the hell?
I'm your Tony Randall.
That's fine.
We needed one.
It's like, oh, we got nothing.
Yeah.
And I happen to be here recording, and they go, do a podcast with us.
All right.
I heard that. What a non-pa organization, this place. We'd be thrilled if you'd be our Tony Randall. to be here recording and they go, do a podcast with us. All right.
I heard that. What a non-pa organization this place is.
We'd be thrilled if you'd be our Tony Randall.
Tony Randall would show up every night at David Letterman's show with carrying his suit
neatly pressed.
Just in case?
And yeah, they go, okay, Tony, drop in.
Oh God, that's hilarious.
Jewish fellow, Lenny Rosenberg.
Oh, that's right.
Is he?
Yeah, yeah.
I believe from Pittsburgh.
Yeah.
And he had a child like at age 70, I don't know what.
Some crazy thing.
And I used to say, you know, you should not have a child at that age because when you get that old, you can't throw a football or a softball
with your son.
And then I said, although I can never imagine Tony Randall ever throwing a softball or a
football with his kid, even at the height of his athletic prowess.
One time they had him on to read the top 10 reasons why it's good to have a kid when you're 75.
Oh, that's right.
That's right.
And I remember one of them was, who cares if the kid cries?
I can't hear a damn thing.
I got to tell you something.
You know, I have a documentary coming out about me called Gilbert.
Yes.
That this filmmaker, Neil Berkley made.
You'll love it, Rich.
I can't wait.
And you were nice enough to take part in a documentary.
I was very nice to do that.
enough to take part in a documentary.
I was very nice to do that.
Now, did you ever, did I say, you know, one of the questions, and I don't know whether it's in the movie.
Is it in the movie?
I don't know.
You have to tell me what it is.
I think they said, you know, Gilbert has been called the comedian's comedian.
They used to call him that in the day.
Yeah.
Okay.
Did they use that, my answer, in the thing?
Which was?
Well, I said he's the opposite of the comedian's comedian.
It doesn't deny how great a comedian he is,
but he's doing stuff that he did 20 years ago.
A comedian's comedian works and works and tries it out and tests it and goes,
I go, he's the furthest link.
Look at us there and go, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Is this what I'm getting paid?
Okay, I'll see you.
Same Joyce DeWitt jokes that I saw him doing in 1976.
And it doesn't deny actually how brilliant you were and are now.
And I know that you still write stuff and you still do new stuff.
But do you tour?
Do you test it out?
Is this going to work?
Maybe I need a word here.
I don't think that you do that for the life of you.
I used to.
Did you?
I used to, like, I'd have bits that worked.
And people would say, why don't you do those bits anymore?
And I said, because they work.
Oh, that's good.
Oh, so you were the comedian's comedian.
I know you now as the laziest son of a bitch.
Yeah, it's like, hey, how many of you in the audience watch Bonanza?
We keep saying that on the show.
I'll reminisce and say, oh, you used to do this Norman Feldman.
Still do it.
Yeah.
Still in there.
Oh, gosh, it's so funny.
Yeah.
Oh, that's hilarious.
Yep, yep, yep, yep.
Anyway, so I gave what I considered was a negative answer.
And the minute I was finished, I went, oh, gosh, this is a documentary honoring Gilbert.
And I just slammed him.
But it's not.
It had nothing to do with how great you are.
It's just.
I don't know if that's in there, but he should have left it in.
Sure.
Yes.
It's because it's accurate.
And I was much more eloquent in answering.
Here, it's like, you know, I'm sort of walking on eggshells because you're here in the room.
And you said you were going to come on.
The reason for coming on the show today
is to tell us who the chicken hawk was
that you mentioned
the last time you were on the show.
The chicken hawk.
Yeah, there was a famous
Hollywood chicken hawk.
I'll tell you, Richard.
Can't do it.
Can't do it.
It's generated a lot of mail.
I can't do it.
I can't do it.
Well, keep the mystery.
The mystery will go on.
The man who told me he was the head of the SWAT team has gone as well.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He was a great guy.
I was friends with the head.
I mean, the founder, the first chief of the first SWAT team in the world.
It was in Los Angeles, best friends with Darryl Gates.
This guy named Jeff Rogers, great guy.
And he was a bodybuilder and he was a tough guy.
He was single all his life, joined the country club that he played at because he didn't like playing.
This is terrible. With Asians at the public courses.
No, but he didn't like the slow play.
It's not...
He watched it that.
Then he felt that the Asians were slow
and he could never talk to them.
He wanted to talk to people
and they would never talk.
He loves this stuff.
But he was a great guy.
And his father was a big band leader and a singer.
And Jeff was a huge opera buff.
Loved the Dodgers.
Loved old cars.
A policeman.
A real guy's guy.
Loved opera.
How about that?
And he would watch Lonesome Dove once a year and read Lonesome Dove once a year.
That's like Larry Mercury.
We had on the show James Caron.
I love James Caron.
Yeah, the best.
I know him.
I know him.
The best guy.
He's great.
Best guy in the world.
He's the one who told us that Moe of the Three Stooges was a big Shakespearean fan.
Oh, I remember hearing that.
Yes.
Yeah. He would love watching Shakespearean production.
That is so incongruous.
Yeah.
I love that, too.
How about Mel Brooks?
Mel Brooks is really the well-read guy.
When you look at the title,
one of the characters' names in the producers is Leo Bloom.
Oh, yes.
I mean, he really, he was a reader, a real, real, real smart reader.
And it's actually one thing that he doesn't wear on his sleeve is how smart he is and learned it.
You know, I mean, he produced Elephant Man.
Oh, absolutely.
And that play with Anthony Hopkins and Anne Bancroft.
Oh, was that 84 Charing Cross Road?
Yes, that's it.
Very good.
I mean, a real learned guy, but he does not wear that on his sleeve.
Yeah.
Two good films.
That one and The Elephant Man.
Yeah.
Both very good.
Yeah.
Both very good.
So you want to shame us for not being able to land Mel Brooks, which you were doing
outside?
Yes.
Put it on him.
He's been told.
He has the phone number. Can I say it? Sure. Put it on him. He's been told. He has the phone number.
Can I say it?
Sure.
I don't want to rush you.
Mel says that he knows Gilbert, loves Gilbert.
Well, this comes from Norman Steinberg, Mel's friend.
And all he has to do is Gilbert has to call.
Okay, can you say that again?
Mel Brooks knows Gilbert, loves Gilbert.
Knows Gilbert loves.
Knows of you, maybe?
He's a fan.
We were told.
He's a fan and loves you.
And he says, all you have to do is call me.
I want Gilbert to call and ask.
And I, honest to God, for the sake of everybody who's listening, call him.
Carl's been on, and Mel's probably asking every night at dinner, what am I, chopped liver?
Why doesn't he call me?
You had me.
You had you.
You had Norman.
But he doesn't call me.
It's like the girl who just opens her legs and you go you go in
oh it's all the wrong
you remember that line
all the wrong signals
maybe from
from play it again Sam
yes wow
I haven't seen that
in many years
remember that line
wow speaking of Tony Roberts
wow okay
oh and thank you
thank you for Tony Roberts again
by the way
Richard helped us book Tony
and he was
turned out to be
one of our better guests
and I told you
he gave me the best
advice ever because I took over a role that he was doing on Broadway,
and he gave me the instructions for what the secret of it is, and I actually use it for all acting.
He said, love your wife.
The more that you love that character, because I played her husband, the more the audience will love her and will love you.
And I thought that was great.
And she's sort of a heinous type of character, like a very obnoxious Upper West Side woman.
It's a horrible, horrible character.
But I loved her.
And I thought that was the most brilliant direction.
You know what's funny?
It's like when I think of like the old show Roseanne.
Right.
And I think of how valuable John Goodman is.
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
Smart casting.
That's absolutely true.
Yes.
Yes.
Aside from being a fine actor, you would watch him and go, wow, he loves this woman.
He's the glue of that show.
Yeah.
I agree with you.
I've never thought of that.
But yes.
But then I have thought, I always said, Helen Hunt made Paul Reiser handsome.
If Helen Hunt loves this guy.
That's interesting.
Oh, you know, he's a beautiful woman.
He loves her.
As a matter of fact, Dara makes you absolutely gorgeous.
Tyrone Power.
You guys want to talk
a little bit about
time travel,
time travel movies,
time travel television?
And I only say because
I happen to know
Richard's a fan
of the time tunnel,
but also we have
a producer of the month
episode here.
One of our listeners,
Christopher Kenny,
said,
why don't you guys
do a time travel movie?
You've talked about them on the show,
a time travel episode.
You've talked about them on the show.
You've talked about lots of Twilight Zones.
Yeah.
And we have Richard here,
who's also a TV and movie buff.
I thought we'd kick that around for a few minutes.
Like the first one, just to get it out of the way,
and it is a great, fun movie.
Which one?
And I think that's, is that Rod Taylor?
You know, I was going to ask you.
I've never seen the original Time Machine.
You haven't?
Shame on me.
Oh, it's great.
I've never seen it.
Oh, it's great.
And that Mimeo was beautiful.
Oh, my God.
And.
An early fantasy.
Really?
If any Mimeo.
Because I saw the Time Machine at Camp Sunapee.
Okay.
That's the first time I saw it on the big sheet that acted as a screen, and that's where I first saw it.
And, of course, once again, mental block, the guy from Mr. Ed.
Oh, Alan Young.
Alan Young.
Right.
Who then later became Scrooge McDuck.
Correct.
Very good.
And he's in there, and he's doing a Scottish accent.
Right.
I know.
But terrific movie.
Yeah.
Just loads of fun.
It is.
And to see it today and know that back then it was so groundbreaking and George Pal and all that, and it's dreadful.
I mean, the special effects are dreadful. It's so much fun when you're watching him
and you see in fast motion buildings getting built
and then torn down and then built up again.
Yes, almost like it was a flip book or something.
Yeah, that's right.
But that brings me to my favorite of favorite of favorite
because although I love time travel, it's really tough to do and really make it.
Yeah, you said that on the phone when we were talking.
You don't think most time travel films are successful because it's hard to.
Because they're always asking questions and how can you go back and how was today.
Right.
It was.
You have to buy in.
You really have to buy.
Of course you do.
And I buy into everything.
You really have to buy. Of course you do.
And I buy into everything.
But the great one and answers all those questions is a time after time.
Not time after time.
The one with Malcolm McDowell.
The Malcolm McDowell one.
Oh, we love that one.
It's the best.
Mary Steenbeck.
We love that one.
We've talked about it on this show.
It's the best of the time travels.
Yeah.
Nicholas Meyer.
And it answers all the questions.
Yeah.
Even with H.G. Wells because she goes back into time and becomes the inspiration for his work.
It's a perfect movie.
It's perfect.
Yeah.
And that was – is that Michael Crichton?
Nicholas Meyer who was the –
Nicholas Meyer.
You're correct.
7% solution. They brought up something interesting in that website cracked where they said one thing they ignore in these time travel movies is if you go in your time machine, how do you know you're going to land in a big open space?
Maybe they put a building up over there.
Absolutely interesting.
And you crash right into this building.
And you could be in between bricks. Yes. Yes, you could be. there. Absolutely interesting. And you crash right into this building. And you could be in between bricks.
Yes.
Yes, you could be.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
Never happened on the time tunnel in all those episodes.
They always landed on a street.
Okay, who was the head of the time tunnel travel thing?
Oh, it was.
Come on, you got the name.
Oh, I asked this and you got it wrong and you said no.
No, you asked me.
I did. What was Lee Merriweather was on there. And you got the name. Oh, I asked this and you got it wrong and you should know it now. No, you asked me. You asked me.
What was Lee Merriweather was on there.
And you know my Lee Merriweather.
You asked me.
No, the one I got wrong was you asked me.
It's who it is.
This is it, I think.
Yeah, well, the guy.
He was also.
Whit Bissell.
Whit Bissell.
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
Yes.
He was still.
He was ahead.
And James Darin.
James Darin.
But who was the other guy?
Colbert. Robert Colbert. You know,. But who was the other guy? Colbert.
Robert Colbert.
You know, not only –
CEO.
You gave me three choices.
L-B-E-R-T.
He's still around.
So is James Darin.
So is James Darin.
We hung out with James Darin at Chiller.
Yes.
Yes.
And he said he'd do the show.
Yes.
So we have to follow up with James Darin.
Yeah.
And Lee Merriweather.
She did the show.
We had her.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. But she was on Time Tunnel. Right. Along with Julie Newmar. Right. Right, Merriweather. She did the show. We had her. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But she was on Time Tunnel.
Right, along with Julie Newmar.
Right, right, right, right.
One is sane and one is not as sane.
I tell you what, speaking of Julie Newmar, I was doing time travel research,
and she turned up in a Twilight Zone time travel episode.
Really?
With Albert Salmi called Of Late I Think of Cliffordville.
Salmi called of late I think of Cliffordville wait is this the one where he he wants to like get rich all over again yes and she played the devil she played a female version of uh okay
oh that's what I remember I remember her yes here's what's wrong with that episode. Okay. And this is always what cracks me up about anything making a deal with the devil.
Exactly.
Because when you make a deal with the devil, he does grant your wish, but with an evil twist on it.
You know, so it'll be like.
Well, it's not an evil twist.
The evil things happen once you get it. You know, so it'll be like... Well, it's not an evil twist. The evil things happen
once you get it. Or they'll
do something like you'll go,
I want to be famous
and then you'll be
famous because you'll die
in a plane crash. Or you're a killer
about to go to the electric chair. Yes.
Yes. There's those. But what
they do in a lot
of those is the wish, the way they phrase the wish is so fucking obvious and stupid.
Yes.
Where they'll go, I want to be rich.
Axe through the head rich.
Is that an expression?
Axe through the head rich you know is that an expression ask through the head rich i i want every beautiful girl in the world oh god i speak through my eye beautiful girl
we will return to gilbert gottfried's amazing colossal podcast after this.
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And now back to the show.
So in that, he says, I want to go back in time, but I want to look just like I did when I was 20.
That's the one.
And you go, well, wait a minute. You didn't look good. Albert saw me never look good. No, he never did. Couldn't have was 20. That's the one. And you go, well, wait a minute.
You didn't look good.
Albert saw me never look good.
No, he never did.
Couldn't have at 20.
And you're going, he says that a few times.
I have to look like I did back then.
And I think, well, no, you'd want to be 20 again.
Yeah.
You'd want to be 20 again.
Sure.
Yeah.
That's not you want to look like it so you'd feel like you're 90 but look like you're 20. So she got him again on the semantics.
Oh, yes.
She tripped him up.
It's semantics.
And I heard he, Salmi, wound up killing himself.
I believe he did.
Yeah.
He did.
I believe he did.
Yeah.
He committed suicide. Wow. He was. I believe he did. Yeah. He committed suicide.
Wow. He was a great actor. He sure was.
I think he was like an actor studio guy
or something like that. He could have been.
He could have been.
Since we're talking about Twilight Zone
time travel ones,
here's one. Once Upon a Time with
Buster Keaton. Oh, yes.
And who was that other actor?
Well, Jesse White's in it
and the guy you're thinking of is Stanley Adams.
That's that big guy
with the big voice like
that. I don't
know Jesse White.
He puts on a helmet
to travel through time. What was so
funny about that
is the beginning of
it, they make like a silent movie yep the beginning of that
twilight zone and then when he goes into modern times then you hear them talk how many how many
twilight zones did buster keaton do i think just that i think just the one yeah i i did find that
there were 12 different time travel stories in the original Twilight Zone. You know this one?
Here's another one with Albert Salmi.
Wow.
Russell Johnson.
I know.
Oh, is this the one with the guy who warns about Lincoln's assassination?
No, I was saving that one.
Oh, I love that one.
That one's called Back There.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's the one where he's the college professor.
Yes.
Right.
And he goes back and the guy drugs him.
Yeah.
At the bar.
The one guy that he's telling it to.
That he's telling that this is, I come from
the future and
then he finds out that the guy that drugged him
he looks at the handkerchief
that the guy gave him and it says JWB
embroidered on the
handkerchief. Serling himself wrote that
one. Oh, wow. Yeah, that's a good one.
But how many of them are based on
true stories? Yeah, that's a good one. But how many of them are based on true stories?
Yeah, true stories.
How many are based on some other
source material? Yes. I don't know.
Versus an original story. That's a good question.
There's one called Execution with Albert
Salmi and Russell Johnson, and this is
where the guy, the cowboy in 1855,
he's about to be hanged.
He's on the gallows.
Do you know about this one?
Oh, yeah.
And the scientist brings him into the future.
Russell Johnson brings him into the future.
I don't remember this one.
And he kills the scientist.
And then a thief breaks in and kills the killer.
Oh, wow.
And that guy stumbles into the time machine,
and he winds up back in the noose.
Yeah. Do you remember this one? back in the noose. Yeah.
You remember this one?
No, not at all.
Okay.
Here's one you will remember, Gil.
It's Walking Distance with Gig Young.
That one I love.
That's where he goes back and meets himself as a child.
Yeah.
All the best.
All the best.
Yeah, that one.
Talk about somebody who killed himself.
Another guy.
Gig Young.
the best. Yeah, that one. Talk about somebody who killed himself. Another guy.
Yeah, he goes back in time
and he sees
himself as a little kid
and a
great actor there,
Frank Overton. Very good.
Plays his father.
Young Ronnie Howard shows up in that one too.
Oh, that's right. And
Frank Overton, he had a
great speaking voice. Frank Overton was great. He was a real 60s TV right. And Frank Overton, he had a great speaking voice.
Frank Overton was great.
He was a real 60s TV actor.
And I remember him saying to him, this isn't your time, Martin.
That's it.
You have to go back.
You can share your childhood with this child.
Yeah.
Everybody, when you talk Twilight Zone, everybody brings that up.
That's great.
But Gig Young was great in that.
Yeah.
He was great.
It's a very
powerful,
touching,
I love that one.
And he was almost
the Frisco,
the Waco kid.
Yes, he sure was.
I almost said the Frisco kid.
Sure was.
The Waco kid.
I know.
They shot with him
and he was vomiting.
And said,
we got to replace him.
And Gene Wilder
comes right in.
And I bet he would have been great in that.
You know what?
All you can do is go back and talk.
I swear to God, because
but I don't
know. I don't know whether or not
something would be considered great
if the original
cast, like I always say
Beverly Hills Cop.
Oh, Stallone. Stallone.
I don't know whether it would be great. I think The Graduate
would have been great with
Groton, but I don't know whether
or not Gig Young. What about Dick Tracy
with Gilbert as Mumbles?
A better
film?
That's hilarious. Well, you lost
it to him.
That's a tough break. you lost it to him. That's a tough break.
I lost Papillon too.
I'm sorry to hear that.
Yeah, it was a tough break.
Because I loved McQueen.
McQueen and I got along,
but we read well together.
Fuck Franklin J. Schaffner.
I'd kill to see you in Papillon.
Here's a couple of other films.
Wait, hold on.
Go ahead.
But what I was going to say, and I didn't even think of it, but you know what clued me?
And then you sort of referred to it sort of again.
A great time travel that nobody would think is time travel.
A feature?
Many times over.
Groundhog Day.
No, but first, a very well-known novel.
Christmas Carol.
Of course.
Oh, my God.
You said Scrooge McDuck, and I'm going, okay.
There you go.
Oh, my God.
That's a great one.
And then you said goes back and sees himself as a kid.
Right.
And then you always see that, and you always cry,
and then they start dancing, and you always go,
okay, skip this part, skip this part.
You know what I love about Christmas Carol where I think Christmas Carol gets it right where they fuck up so many times.
What?
In other things.
Where they'll go like, for instance, they'll say, I'm going to show you what it was like if you had become president.
Right.
And then the next scene, it's like, oh, where am I now?
And they go, why, you're the president.
I am?
And it's like, no, if you're the president, you know you're the president.
You ran for president. You ran for president.
You know all this.
So the only way to do it is to be by being a ghost and observing yourself.
Yes.
Because it wouldn't make sense where like a beautiful girl shows up and goes, wait a minute.
I married you well if you're married to her yeah you know who you're married to right so that's why i'll tell you who else
because no no no all those soldiers died no they were killed when your brother wasn't there oh it's
a wonderful life a wonderful life. It's a wonderful life.
Also another.
Also does it well.
Yeah.
Yeah, does it very well.
It really does.
Yeah.
But it's really short.
It's really, it's a very terse.
Yeah, but there is a time travel element.
You don't think of it off the top of your head as a time travel movie.
Right, but it does.
But it has that element.
Yes, all those boys were died.
But that whole thing owes so much to Dickens. Yes. The whole idea of the angels taking him back. It's Christmas Eve, for those boys died. But that whole thing owes so much to Dickens.
The whole idea of the angel taking him back.
It's Christmas Eve, for God's sake.
And it also where the druggist is an alcoholic.
Yeah, Mr. Gower.
Oh, no, Mr. Gower, it's my baby.
Yes.
Watch it every year.
And Bert and Ernie.
And that is why they're named Bert and Ernie.
It fills your heart to the point that you almost forget that Ward Bond was hunting down commies and ruining their lives.
Yes.
And he hated the Jews.
I love talking.
Gosh, it brings a tear to my eye, bringing up the anti-Semites.
Why are you lifting your hand?
Ed Asner had no love for Ward Bond.
up the anti-semites now and as why are you lifting your head no love for ward bond yes now also in that uh oh most importantly uh about uh uh it's a wonderful life is that one of the characters
in the adventures of ford fairlane was named zuuzu Pedals. Love it.
That's really, really.
That is arcane.
That's fantastic.
I love that.
That's fantastic.
Were you in that movie?
Yes. He was.
Okay, so you saw it, and that's how you know.
Okay, I didn't.
Dustin Hoffman wanted to be in the movie, but they liked my test a lot better.
What's your favorite Scrooge movie?
Is it the Alistair Sim?
Oh, yeah.
Because I saw the Finney one.
My favorite still is Mr. Magoo.
Me too.
I remember that.
And Mario Cantone didn't like it.
And he's out of his mind.
Fuck him.
Fuck him.
Fuck him.
And now I'm homophobic because of that.
La, la, la, la, la, la.
La, la. We'll can do all the songs.
Millions of feet walk through the world, make such a lonely sound.
Is it Bacchus?
Did they have the original?
Yes.
And Musselberry Pudding or whatever.
Oh, can we have a Christmas tree with Musselberry dressing?
Mario's going to love this.
I'm going to play this for him immediately.
The Finney version's good, actually.
The Finney version and George C. Scott.
George C. Scott's good.
Then there was Henry Winkler played Scrooge.
Yes.
Well, I'll tell you the worst of the remakes.
Marlo Thomas.
Oh, that shouldn't have happened.
Yeah.
Yeah.
There's a real.
I heard that Marlo Thomas, when she was starting work on this.
Right.
She went up to.
Capra.
Capra.
Yeah.
to Capra.
Capra.
She went to Capra and said,
I'm going to be doing
a remake
of It's a Wonderful
Life. Do you have any
advice? And Capra's
advice was, don't.
Yeah, that's strong. With Orson
Wells as Mr. Potter. Yes.
Now, who was Clarence? Because it was Clarice. Yeah, that's strong. With Orson Welles as Mr. Potter. Yes. Right. Now, who was Clarence?
Because it was Clarice.
Yes, it was.
Oh, boy, I've got you.
Oh, this delights me.
I am delighted.
Oh, Jesus.
I really should know this.
Yeah.
Somebody you wouldn't think of, like Maureen Stapleton.
That's a good close guess.
Older actress.
Well, no.
At the time, she wasn't that old, but she's respected and great.
A really good actress.
Give me a hint.
Warren Beatty called her the best fuck in Hollywood, and there is no second.
I've told you that on the show, right?
No.
What?
Yes, you did.
You did?
Oh, I did.
Well, I wasn't paying attention.
But it wasn't Estelle Parsons.
No.
No. That is correct. It was not. Nor was it Gene Hackman. Oh, I did. Well, I wasn't paying attention. But it wasn't Estelle Parsons. No. No, that is correct.
It was not.
Nor was it Gene Hackman.
Oh, I know who it is.
Yes, because you told us this.
Cloris Leachman.
Yeah, yeah.
I knew Gene Hackman fucked Cloris Leachman.
Yes.
I've never seen the Marlo Thomas version.
Yeah.
Gene Hackman fucked Cloris Leachman?
Yeah.
I think she talked about it in some interview.
We got to get Cloris Leachman in here.
Yes.
He fucked her.
Oh, she'll be great.
Any connection?
No.
Okay.
No.
It's honest.
No, I don't.
I've met her.
I've touched her ass.
I'm not kidding.
You and Ed Asner.
No, but she really worked out all the time, all the time, and had a great body,
and she was beautiful. She was a beauty queen, everything like that. But in her 80s,
she worked out all the time, and she would take your hand and put it on her butt, and it was
rock hard. I'll bet. I heard someone had told me they were working on some movie or TV movie with Cloris Leachman and Tony Randall.
And Tony Randall walked in when Cloris Leachman was sitting there.
And he goes, I bit off her clitoris and she became cloris.
Wow.
Oh, that was a regular Cole Porter.
If I could only live up to Tony Randall and truly say something witty.
I don't know if we can top that.
That's fantastic.
Well, we're at the 30-minute mark.
Wow.
I'll tell you, for a short episode, this wasn't so good.
I'll tell you, we could keep going, but that was fun.
That was fun.
We can definitely say this time we didn't scratch the surface.
Yes, we didn't.
Of time travel. We didn't. But, you know, there's a lot of time we didn't scratch the surface. Yes. Of time travel.
We didn't.
But, you know, there's a lot of time travel movies here on the list,
and another time we'll talk about them.
All right.
I mean, the whole Planet of the Apes series.
Oh, exactly.
For one thing.
Yes.
Or Terminator.
Yes.
Yes, but Groundhog Day.
You brought up Groundhog Day.
Yeah.
A very satisfying, one of the greats.
I think it's a perfect film.
I don't because I keep asking questions.
He's in a car accident.
I don't understand.
I don't understand.
I don't understand.
And that one, and I buy the movie.
Of course I do.
But I just scratch my head.
That's interesting.
I go, no, no, no.
He died horrible, horrible deaths.
And he wakes up.
Right.
So where did he go?
Was it reality?
I don't know.
Well, it's a complete fantasy.
You have to just go with it or not.
Oh, I didn't know that.
Oh, it is a complete fantasy.
I see.
Oh, I'll look at it again then in a whole different light.
Before I forget, there was a twilight zone and this one
annoyed me as a lot of the twilights i love the twilight zone but every now and then you go oh
come on and this was a guy goes back in time to assassinate hitler i remember the chair so he
checks into a rooming house where his window is right across from where Hitler will be making a speech.
He's got his rifle ready.
And there's a knock on the door and it's the maid.
And he goes, oh, damn.
And he opens the door.
Why can't you say I'm in the shower?
Come back in 10
and have some chocolates
yeah
yeah
don't need
that ruined the whole episode
for you
yeah
don't need the room
furnished
thanks anyway
10 minutes
gotta kill Hitler
killing Hitler
I'll be with you in a second
you guys are real sticklers
for logic
in these things
it's fascinating
I
you're absolutely right
you have pushed you have hit the nail on the
head. I need to be truly convinced. I think Back to the Future does convince me. They tie up all
the questions that I scratch my head about time after time. It answers those questions. Some of
them don't. And that one, I agree with you. Why didn't you?
Very interesting.
I know.
And yes, Frank, I know they're fantasies.
I got to admit, when you brought this up, I said, oh, we're going to talk about fantastical movies.
One Twilight Zone that's making a deal with the devil.
Which is?
Or a genie or something.
Is it a Jack Klugman one?
This is,
uh,
uh,
Lou Adler.
Wow.
Yeah.
Okay.
And he plays like a Jewish pawnbroker.
Lou Adler,
the producer of the mamas and the papas.
No,
no.
What's his name?
Stella Adler.
Lou Ayers?
No,
no,
no.
Stella Adler's brother.
Yeah. Stella Adler's brother. Um, was it Lou? No, no. It's a name? No, Stella Adler. Lou Ayers? No, no, no. Stella Adler's brother. Yeah.
Stella Adler's brother.
Yes.
Was it Lou?
No, it's a different Adler, but I know who you mean.
What's his name?
I know who you're talking about.
Oh, my God.
Luther.
Luther Adler.
Luther Adler.
Very nice.
Luther Adler.
Well, I knew him, so I called him Lou.
And so Luther Adler makes all these wishes, and each one of them has got a bad twist on it.
But he still has more wishes to go. So finally, he goes, I want to be the most powerful man in the world.
And then the devil goes, okay.
And then you see him in a dark room with a little black square mustache on.
And Luther Adler, biggest Jew you'll ever meet,
in a very dramatic ending goes, oh no, I'm Hitler in the bunker.
Yeah.
We got to do a whole Twilight Zone episode with you guys.
And I thought, on paper, I'm sure that was powerful.
Right, right.
But when you watch it, it's jaw-dropping.
That's hilarious.
So funny.
Drop in any time.
Surprise us.
This was a nice surprise.
I love being here.
A nice treat.
If you can't go have coffee, might as well have microphones.
And your idea about the comedians will make a great future episode, so come by.
Come back.
And I'm not just talking about comedians.
I'm talking about actors.
Yeah, Gilbert will love that idea.
We just didn't have the time tonight for it.
All righty.
And this has been, I'm Gilbert Gottfried with my co-host Frank Santopadre.
This has been Gilbert and Frank's amazing, colossal session.
And the annoying Jew in the background who can't stop complaining is Richard Time.
Thank you, Richard.
And thank you to Christopher Kenny for the idea.
Colossal Obsessions.