Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - Mini #146: Bad Movie Musicals, Part 2

Episode Date: January 11, 2018

This week: "Moose Murders" flops! "Popeye" sinks! Bacharach and David call it quits! Remembering Richard Mulligan! And the musical stylings of Charles Durning!? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit... megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:01:23 19 and over and physically present in Ontario. Eligibility restrictions apply. See casino.draftkings.com for details. Please play responsibly. Hi, this is Gilbert Gottfried, and I'm here with Frank. I forgot your name.
Starting point is 00:01:47 That's fine. I'm sorry. Frank Santopadre. Gorshin. And yes, I'm here with Frank Langella and Frank Santopadre. I think I said that already. Yeah. And this is Gilbert and Frank's amazing, colossal obsessions.
Starting point is 00:02:08 It is indeed that. Could I just clear out some of these coffee cups before we get started? Go right ahead. Coffee cups. Gilbert's particularly Flemish this evening. How are you, Paul? I'm good. And I want to talk about one of Gilbert's favorite genres.
Starting point is 00:02:24 Oh, can I get one thing out of the way? When I came into the studio today, there was a package for me from a Perry Shaw in Philadelphia. That's the guy. Who painted a picture of me as Dracula. Yes, with the fangs and the blood dripping down. It's quite good, Harry. So, nice job. We always get a big kick out of different artwork sent to us.
Starting point is 00:02:53 Yeah, people, by the way, are always asking where to send stuff. And Frank is very nice, and he receives stuff here at Nutmeg for us. For a nominal fee. For a nominal fee. You can always send it to Nutmeg Studios here on West 45th Street and care of us. For a nominal fee. For a nominal fee. You can always send it to Nutmeg Studios here on West 45th Street and care of us. Yeah, the receptionists are going to love that. Thanks, Frank. That's great.
Starting point is 00:03:12 Well, listen. Keep the card and letter coming. If there's any women out there who want to send me naked pictures, just tell. It's really not the climate for that. No! Just stop. It's really not the climate for that. No. Oh, boy.
Starting point is 00:03:33 Did you guys talk about this one at all? Because this is pretty slick. We did. We talked about them on the last mini. I knew that. Yes. Because I was totally paying attention. Last coloring book on the left.
Starting point is 00:03:43 Yes. Thank you for. So you were going to say my favorite. Yeah, Paul. What did you come up with? What is this episode about? This episode is part two. It's a long delayed part two because I think we did part one in September.
Starting point is 00:03:58 Yeah. Well, we did an episode about bad movie musicals and it worked out well Gil had a good time, and we thought we'd bring it back. I thought that's the one we were doing. Is that the size of it? I just wanted to check. I don't know if we were doing Gilbert portraits today. You never know. You never know with him. And if anyone out there could tell me if Richard Mulligan was in a TV series called The Hero.
Starting point is 00:04:19 I couldn't find it. I looked. Really? Well, also, my phone died in the middle, but you may be right. Well, excuse me. I'm the researcher around here. I didn't mean it. I looked. Really? Well, also my phone died in the middle, but you may be right. Well, excuse me. I'm the researcher around here. I didn't mean to take your job. I think he played, if I'm not getting this totally ass backwards like I sometimes do,
Starting point is 00:04:35 like a TV hero. Like he's an actor. You know who played that? You know, Sam Garrett plays brave TV cowboy star Jed Clayton. He found it. But the problem is he's under-coordinated. Oh! Is that it?
Starting point is 00:04:52 Richard Mulligan? Yeah. Scared of horses and has allergies. Oh, okay. That sounds like it. What's the year on that, Frankie? That would be 1966, 67. Gilbert, you're good. See?
Starting point is 00:05:05 Now Frankie's taking your job. Sam Garrett, Ruth Garrett, Richard Mulligan, Mariette Hartley, Victor French, and a lot of other people. From Little House on the Prairie, Victor French. And Mariette Hartley from the woman that
Starting point is 00:05:21 everyone thought she was James Garner's wife. And I was on her talk show. You were. Yeah. What were those commercials for? I think Polaroid. Polaroid, was it? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:32 Yeah, they always thought they were a married couple. Because they always showed them as husband and wife. Right. So everyone immediately thought. I mean, that launched her career. I don't think she did much. Mariette Hartley. She was an actress in a lot of 70s television.
Starting point is 00:05:45 It's funny when you talk about actors playing superheroes, I think of Jack Cassidy on He and She, the Richard Benjamin show. Yes. Jack Cassidy was an actor playing a superhero. Wow. Because Richard Benjamin was a cartoonist who created the superhero. Do you remember any of this? I remember, well, he was in two uh cassidy was in
Starting point is 00:06:08 two colombo episodes yeah two good ones yeah yeah and i remember that one where he's like the magician yeah like a blackstone character and and at the end of course columbo finds out that it's him, and he's taking him away to jail. And he goes, you know, and he's the magician. And he goes, I thought I had performed the perfect murder. And Peter Falk goes, there's no such a thing, sir. It's only an illusion. I never heard you, Peter Falk. I love it.
Starting point is 00:06:49 It's bordering on Brando. By the way, speaking of that, how about Jimmy Fallon's Gilbert? Fantastic. Yes. The first impression he did on Saturday Night Live was Gilbert Gottfried. Was Gilbert Gottfried, yeah. I was in the studio when he did it. Twice.
Starting point is 00:07:04 Twice I was there, and boy, it sounded. Did I show you the clip? Oh, yes. I was in the studio when he did it. Were you really? Twice. Twice I was there, and boy, it sounded. Did I show you the clip? Oh, yes. I sent you the clip. Very funny. If anything happens to Gilbert, we just bring Jimmy in. Yeah, he'll come. Nobody will.
Starting point is 00:07:14 I remember I was walking down 14th Street. I was going home, and there was like some electronic store and it was at night, but they had the TV on. It was Saturday Night Live and it looked like Hollywood Squares. And I saw some guy, you know, scrunching up his face and at the time he wasn't known. So I later saw him at some Saturday Night Live party. I love it. Was that you? I love it.
Starting point is 00:07:52 So, yeah, check it. It's like something out of a movie. He sees himself on television in an electronics store window. As the set collapses. Right. So this was on The View that he did it recently. It was on The View. So check out Jimmy Fallon on The View.
Starting point is 00:08:04 He did it on the old, when I worked on the old Joy Show for CNN, he did it there too. So I was in the room twice, and it's dead on. Oh, yeah. The dead on impression. It's very funny. You want to talk about bad movie musicals? So we want to talk about bad movie musicals. If we can stump this man.
Starting point is 00:08:16 There are plenty. We ended last time with a brief reference to Chorus Line and said we'd get back to that. I don't want to say too much about Chorus Line, except it was a really bad musical. And the tragedy, of course, is the play was phenomenal. I've never seen the movie. The play was phenomenal. The movie just, everything that was exciting and touching and original in the show becomes maudlin and syrupy
Starting point is 00:08:38 and horrible in the film. Did you see it? Did you see Chorus Line in the movie? No, I'm heterosexual. Okay. Allegedly. Okay, so that's considered a bad music. That's considered a bad music.
Starting point is 00:08:51 Unpopular, certainly. Just to give you the kind of thing we're talking about here. Now, here's another thing I thought to just set the scene. I want everybody to be in the mood for this episode. Okay. Are some of the shortest running shows ever to hit Broadway. Okay. Oh, you're setting a tone here.
Starting point is 00:09:03 I'm setting a tone here of shows that really we shouldn't even be reminding people about. Go ahead. It's too late now. Is Moose Murders on there? Moose Murders, I believe is it? Yes, Moose Murders. Well, let me get to that. So, do you remember the film High Fidelity?
Starting point is 00:09:16 Oh, yes. Yes. It's a great movie. Good book, great movie, terrible musical. It made the top 10 shortest runs on this list, 14 performances, 18 previews. Zoinks. This is from the TicketNetwork.com blog, by the way. There are some other things that the commenters mentioned, so we don't have everything here, but just a few hits.
Starting point is 00:09:39 Elling, based on the Norwegian film of the same name. Don't know it. I mention it only because I thought I could finally stump you guys. I'd want to hear it. Nobody knows Elling. Lolita, nine days after it began, closed. How can you go wrong with Lolita? Lolita was a musical?
Starting point is 00:09:54 Lolita was a musical. With what, Tommy Toon as Humbert Humbert? I don't know. So a musical about a pedophile. I don't think it was a musical. Yeah. Whatever it is think it was a musical. Yeah. Okay. Whatever it is, it closed after April.
Starting point is 00:10:09 There's no way to tell now whether it was a musical or not. Carrie. Oh, Carrie. Yeah, that was a big flop. Oh, that sounds like a ridiculous. Okay, here you go. A one-woman play starring Ellen Burstyn as she told stories through the eyes of the title character. Opened November 17, 2003.
Starting point is 00:10:28 Closed the next day after two total regular performances. That sounds good. The oldest living Confederate widow tells all. Yeah, that's a famous book. I don't know. I haven't read it, but the title is memorable. Glory Days is number two, which must have been a bad. Oh, a pretty sweet jukebox musical. I don't even read it, but the title is memorable. Glory Days is number two, which must have been a bad... Oh, a Spirits in the Jukebox musical?
Starting point is 00:10:47 I don't think it was. I think it was just Glory Days, but it must have been suggested by the Springsteen song, I think. And number one, according to this list anyway, number one shortest thing that closed on opening night right after the first performance, Moose Murders. Yeah, Moose Murders is infamous. I was at opening night of another legendary flop called Late Night Comic, which starred Robert LuPone, who was Patti LuPone's brother. Oh, wow. And I think it closed in two days, and I was there on opening night.
Starting point is 00:11:18 I remember critics being suicidal during the intermission. Oh, yeah. During the comedy boom of the 80s, somebody decided that this would make a good Broadway musical. What else you got for us? Oh, yeah. Is this where we're going next? I remember seeing reviews of that.
Starting point is 00:11:35 Yeah, late night comic. I went on opening night. I had freebies through the Writers Guild. It was horrible. Yeah. Yeah. It was a good idea. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:44 Is this where we're going next year or what? We've got a few things queued up, right? Can you see it from there? I can see it. Yeah, I think I want to start with the chronological with the first one and see if we can stump him. The one I was holding up. Which one? That would be boy, the production value of this show.
Starting point is 00:12:00 It's just, I'm telling you. It's like a Cecil B. DeMille production. Hold it closer so I can read it. We'll start with this one. See it in the post. Do it nice. Let's start with this one and see if we can stump Gilbert with it.
Starting point is 00:12:14 This is a legendary bad musical. Oh. This is music from it. Yes. He's making another one. My friend the doctor says the sun is made of cheddar cheese. The doctor even knows the reason why. The facts are these.
Starting point is 00:12:31 Try if you please pretending you're a lonely cheese. Wouldn't you want to try finding an apple pie? Of course you would. Maybe what the doctor tells me isn't altogether true. But I love every day he tells me. Who would that singer be? I'll give you a hint. You do an impression of him as a singer.
Starting point is 00:12:54 Oh, my God. Well, it's not Newley. It is. It is? It's Anthony Newley. But what's the bad musical, the gigantic musical flop that he was singing? You know, it sounds different. He doesn't have quite that. Yeah, not in that particular.
Starting point is 00:13:11 This must be earlier in his career. Yeah. 1967 and a legendary flop. Anything? Was nominated for the Academy Award for Best Picture. Surprisingly. I wanted to manage that. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:27 Teach me everything you know. What? 2,000 languages? Certainly. We'll start at 8 o'clock tomorrow morning. That ring a bell, Gilbert? But it took me over 100 years. Then we'll start at 7 o'clock.
Starting point is 00:13:38 There's not a moment to lose. Well, that's a different musical. It's Rex Harrison and Anthony Newey from Dr. Dolittle. Oh my God! The budget went triple. It was supposed to be $6 million. It tripled in part because of numerous technical
Starting point is 00:13:56 difficulties inherent with the large number of animals required for this. Those animals, you see the kind of trailers the animals demand. What I love is this. This is what I loved. I found this, and this was some research about the film. There are anecdotes of a goat who ate a script, a parrot that learned to yell cut on set.
Starting point is 00:14:19 But I love this. 1,200 animals. Did you say that? In one instance, ducks for the film were placed on a lake but had apparently forgotten how to swim and began to sink, and crew members had to jump into the water to save them. And here's my favorite. Animals also bit and defecated on the cast and crew. Oh, jeez.
Starting point is 00:14:34 The bit with the ducks in the pond was probably funnier than anything in the movie. Gilbert will love this. Anthony Newley and Rex Harrison did not get along. This is according to Wikipedia, which I know isn't always reliable. I think he said Rex Harrison used to call him that Jew. He made, according to this, Newley was incensed by anti-Semitic comments that Harrison made.
Starting point is 00:15:00 He was apparently jealous of the Jewish co-star's participation in the film and demanded Newley's role be reduced. Geoffrey Holder. Remember that actor? Oh, yes. The Mr. Akola Not. He received racist abuse from Rex Harrison's entourage. How about that? Wow.
Starting point is 00:15:18 Yeah. So then Rex Harrison, we can safely say, hated blacks and Jews. I wouldn't know if I'd go that far. This is all just according to Wikipedia. No, I mean, I remember Anthony Newley saying in an interview. They did not get along. Yeah, he used to call them the Jew. This also says there was a role, there was a character called Bumpo,
Starting point is 00:15:42 played by Sammy Davis Jr. Or Sammy Davis was proposed for the roleumbo, played by Sammy Davis Jr. Sammy Davis was proposed for the role. Boy, talk about the worst version to be with Rick. Black Jew. Harrison insists they recast the role with Sidney Poitier, even though Poitier was
Starting point is 00:15:59 not a musician or a musical performer, and they wound up cutting the part altogether. It was a very, very accursed was a cursed production through and through. Here's from the New York Times Review, Bosley Crowther. The music is not exceptional. The rendering of the songs lacks variety, and the pace is slow and without surprise. Yeah. It's pretty bad.
Starting point is 00:16:19 It's pretty tedious. The funny thing is, then Sammy Davis had a hit with If I Could Talk to the Animals. Of all things. Yeah. And it's much better. His rendition is much better than Rex Harrison's rendition. I'm partial to Gilder Radner's Let's Talk Dirty to the Animals. We will return to Gilbert Gottfried's amazing colossal podcast after this.
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Starting point is 00:18:08 1-866-531-2600. 19 and over and physically present in Ontario. Eligibility restrictions apply. See casino.draftkings.com for details. Please play responsibly. And now back to the show. You want to try the next movie? You want to see if you can stump him on this one?
Starting point is 00:18:24 And if we go along, we'll do another part. I got so many production values here. Hang on. What's the next one I had queued, Frank? Should I tell you? Won't they give it away? No, I mean just run it. See if Gilbert knows it. Here it comes. And we'll jump. We'll garden together and we'll
Starting point is 00:18:39 play house. I've been sailing by the seven seas looking for some buddies who would sail with me. Sail with me. Sail with me. And I've been waiting for someone like you, a man who could love me and will promise to stay with me. Stay with me. Any guesses on who that is? I'm lost on this. Why am I seeing Jack Nicholson for some reason here?
Starting point is 00:19:16 Well, you're trying to get on my head. The year is 1980. Yeah. The singers you're hearing are Shelley Duvall and Robin Williams. Oh, Popeye? The movie is Popeye. Oh, my God. Popeye was like, yeah, that was Altman.
Starting point is 00:19:34 Yeah, that's right. And that was- Who better to make a musical? Oh, my God. Robert Altman. Fucking mess. The set is like some tipped, cockeyed thing. You wonder how anybody could stand up on it.
Starting point is 00:19:45 It's just a horrible movie. Well, that was a doomed production in many ways. We talked to Paul Dooley about it. He was in it. He played Wimpy. Oh, that's right. And we had him on the show. The thing about that movie, and no one loves Harry Nielsen more than I do.
Starting point is 00:20:00 Yeah. Those songs are terrible. As Leonard Maltin referred to them in his movie review book, Alleged Songs by Harry Nilsson. I remember, too, watching that movie that there are these clumsy voiceovers. Yeah. Like they'll have a boat and you won't see anyone talking. They'll have a boat and you won't see anyone talking, but someone will go, oh, well, now we have to go to the island of so-and-so where we have to capture. And it's like they're telling the audience because it's such a fucking mess.
Starting point is 00:20:42 They have to have a voiceover tell you what these characters are doing. I think it was one of those movies that was just plagued by recuts and reshoots. They were in Malta forever, and they ran into bad weather. Paul Dooley, go back and listen to the Paul Dooley episode. Originally, Altman was looking for Dustin Hoffman. Yes, Dustin Hoffman and Lily Tomlin to play Olive Oil. It would have been interesting because he worked with Lee Tomlin a bunch of times. And the performances are good, believe it or not. Yes.
Starting point is 00:21:09 The Olive Oils performance, Shelley Duvall and Robin, are both very good. Oh, yeah. In this debacle, this thing that's kind of sinking around them. I don't know. I'm not sure I can go with you on Shelley Duvall. That's why I mentioned Jackie Nicholson. Because she's had her share of- She was tormented by Stanley Kubrick.
Starting point is 00:21:27 I feel sorry for her. But it is hard to watch. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. And all that talent. Jules Feiffer, right? The screenplay and Robin and Robert Altman and you just and Harry Nielsen.
Starting point is 00:21:39 And how could it how could you go wrong? A complete mess. Yeah. Want to try another one? Yeah. What was the next one cued, Frank? This one. This is from two years later, Gil.
Starting point is 00:21:51 I'm giving you a hint. 1982. Let me make sure I've got it placed right. Stand by. I'll give you money if you can name the singer. Thank you. Fellow Texans, I am proudly standing here to humbly sing. I assure you, and I mean it, now who says I don't speak out as plain as day?
Starting point is 00:22:36 And, fellow Texans, I'm for progress and the flag. Long may it fly. I'm a poor boy. Come to greatness. So it follows that I cannot tell a lie You know what? It's not. But you know what that sounded like to me? That one, well, I'm a bill
Starting point is 00:22:57 And I'm going to Congress Yeah, it's not like Jack Sheldon. Yeah. Of course, when you pass a bill It's actually one of your favorite actors who is not known for singing. Well, for good reason. Take a guess. God, it sounds.
Starting point is 00:23:15 He was a war hero. We talked about him on the show. Durning? Charles Durning. Charles Durning? That is the best little whorehouse in Texas. Oh, my God. Yeah, with Burt Reynolds and Lonnie Anderson.
Starting point is 00:23:32 And I think... Dolly Parton. And I think Jim Neighbors. Yeah, right. And Tom Deluise. He's actually in it. No, it was Dolly Parton and Burt Reynolds. Here's a story I heard.
Starting point is 00:23:42 Go ahead. On the set. You're so off off the reservation you notice how gilbert gilbert never says anything about people he doesn't like yeah best little whorehouse uh there was uh this guy he said he was there uh he was working on it. And Jim Neighbors was there with his partner. And his partner, even though gay, was talking about how much he wanted to fuck, you know, Dolly Parton. And so one time, he's not on the set that day, and Jim Nabors calls, and someone takes the phone, and he goes, I guess his boyfriend's name was like george uh-huh and this guy's name
Starting point is 00:24:48 was george so they said and the guy so mistakenly goes uh george uh jim neighbors wants to talk to you he goes all right he says hello and he goes you son of a bitch. You motherfucker. You're going to stick your dick in my ass and then fuck? Dial a pardon? You think that I'm going to blow you after you fuck? Dial a pardon? you after you fuck Dolly Parton? And that's so that's what
Starting point is 00:25:29 the classic little house That's beautiful. That's little or a house. I have a tear running down my cheek. Where the hell did you come up with that? This guy told me.
Starting point is 00:25:45 The other George? Yes, the other George. I think it was Burgess Meredith. The other George. I thought the punchline was going to be the guy says, excuse me, I'm sorry, I'll put the other George on. Was he talking to the wrong guy? Yeah, no, he just stayed there and was told off.
Starting point is 00:26:03 That's beautiful. Was dressed down by Jim Nabors. As Paul Schaefer would say, cute story. Do you have anything to add to that, Paul? Yeah, cute, cute story. What I don't understand in so many of these things doing the research here, this one was, let's see, this was, Durning was nominated for the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor.
Starting point is 00:26:22 Uh-huh. Not for his singing, apparently. Yeah. Golden Globe nominations for the Best Motion Picture, Comedy, or Musical. I have to say, it isn't terrible. It's not very good, in my opinion. My wife likes it. But it's not terrible.
Starting point is 00:26:36 It's not on a Popeye level. Right, but it's got all these awards and nominations and things. Yeah. That might lead you to think that the Academy Awards don't always go to the right people. That's shocking. Gilbert's been snubbed for years. His fine work as Annie Sullivan in The Miracle Worker has been ignored too long. What was the next one?
Starting point is 00:26:58 Here it comes. There's a bell up in your brain that's ringing Making a crazy ding dong And if this bed don't desert us Then there's nothing in the world can hurt us Long as we're singing our song. Give me trumpets, legato. Put some sexes with them.
Starting point is 00:27:35 Lost. His name's been in the news a lot lately. The one who's singing the adult role. Harvey Weinstein. No, it's not the Harvey Weinstein musical. But you're warm. I do want to say watching this right now is more than a little creepy. I know it is, and that's why I picked it.
Starting point is 00:27:53 Oh! It's not the Harvey Weinstein musical. Oh, jeez. Is it the Louis C.K. musical? No, it's not that either. His career is tumbling like a house of cards right now. Oh, jeez. What's the musical?
Starting point is 00:28:09 Kevin Spacey? Yes, but what's the musical? Oh, well, I know he did that Bobby Darin. That's what it is. It's from Beyond the Sea. This is what's known as a vanity project. Which he was too old to do. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:22 He was way too old to do it. 45, I think. And they put on that big rubber nose. And the tu do. Oh, yeah. He was way too old to do it. 45, I think. And they put on that big rubber nose. And the toop. Oh, yes. Yeah, and the bad sideburns. I watched some of it last night. Oh, boy.
Starting point is 00:28:33 Lots of boys. Well, one of the boys is him as a younger, it's the young Bobby Darin. It's way too Freudian. I know. Yeah. It's good. Somebody toldin. It's way too Freudian. I know. It's good. Somebody told him to go fuck himself. What do you have on Beyond the Sea, Paul, in your notes?
Starting point is 00:28:57 The thing that I liked about it, or the thing that I liked and didn't like, was these were a lot of great tunes. I mean, he did a lot of great stuff. Oh, yeah. Bobby Darin did a lot of great stuff. Bobby Darin's a genius. That's another conversation. Yeah, you listen to Kevin Spacey and you want to be hearing Bobby Darin,
Starting point is 00:29:10 who's, you know, even the silly stuff like Splish Splash, I'm Taking a Bath. Well, he loved him. He loved Bobby Darin. He had such a passion. It was a passion project. Right. But maybe one that shouldn't have been attempted. My favorite part of that movie is I always love when characters have to tell the audience. They got to rely information on the audience.
Starting point is 00:29:35 So John Goodman is Bobby Darin's manager in it. And Bobby Darin goes, look at me. I've accomplished nothing. And John Goodman, as the manager, goes, what are you talking about, Bobby? You've already gotten 16 gold records on album that's gone platinum. You've been nominated for an Academy Award. You've been picked greatest performer in Las Vegas five years in a row. And it's like, okay, can I write this down? Let me put it on. It's the modern-day equivalent of the newspaper headlines slamming down.
Starting point is 00:30:22 Yes, yes. It shows the passage of time. Interestingly, Gilbert had trouble guessing which show we were talking about, but it turns out he knows the entire script. Yeah. And he has an anecdote about each one that he can't guess. He hasn't guessed one, but he has a story.
Starting point is 00:30:38 Is there one more? And then John Goodman goes, Wait, you're going to fuck Kevin Spacey and then fuck me? All right. You lunatic. This is one of my pet peeves in a lot of these musicals. At the time this was made, Kate. One of my pet peeves is when someone fucks Dolly Parton and then thinks they can fuck Jim Nabors.
Starting point is 00:31:10 That's a pet peeve, is it? Yes. How often does that come up? Constantly. It came up while I was talking about it. That's a peeve you want to pet at any opportunity. I'm not sure we can even finish this. It's coming up now. Yes.
Starting point is 00:31:32 Anything else? This may be telling in light of recent events, but in so many of these things, Kate Bosworth was 21 when the movie was made. He was 45. Well, Sandra Dee was younger than Bobby Darin. But you see this in these movies,
Starting point is 00:31:50 The Music Man. I don't know what the age difference was there. It was Shirley Jones and Robert Preston. That's a pretty good musical. That's a great musical. But again, it has that age difference. Even The Sound of Music, she was 16, he was going on 17.
Starting point is 00:32:11 Oh, okay. sound of music she was 16 he was going on 17 you want to do this edit that out you want you want to do this on a woman, and then you have two. Add on a child, and what have you got? You've got more than three. You have what they call a family Living together, working together Just working together That's what it is Did you notice?
Starting point is 00:33:02 Of course. Working together He knows this, too. Just working together. This was the one with Lee Volman. Yes, as Bette Midler said, I never miss a Lee Volman musical. Yes. Lost Horizons.
Starting point is 00:33:15 Lost Horizons. Yes, that one I remember. They would play that a lot. Working together, playing together. And ironically, since you're talking about working together, playing together. And ironically, since you're talking about working together, this movie ended the long and successful partnership between Hal David and Burt Bacharach. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:33:33 Did you know that? No, I knew that was a Bacharach song. Yeah, because... It ended it, but when was this? In 1973. Yeah, this is a terrible, terrible movie. I mean, this movie makes every worst list. I think it's in a book called The 50 Worst Films of All Time by Michael Medved.
Starting point is 00:33:54 It is wretched on so many. Have you seen it? I have not seen it. You need to watch it. You've sat through this thing from start to finish? I've seen bits and pieces of it, and I remember them playing that song. Yeah. Well, it's a remake of Capra's Lost Horizon from 1935 and the book by James Hilton.
Starting point is 00:34:13 Right. And it has this great cast. Peter Finch, Sally Kellerman, George Kennedy, Michael Young, Olivia Hussey you brought up. Oh, yeah. The great Bobby Vann. Of course, I found out. Someone told me Olivia Hussey is a fan of mine. Oh, yeah. The Great Bobby Van. Of course, I found out. Someone told me Olivia Hussey is a fan of mine. I love that. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:31 John Gielgud, Charles Boyer was the High Llama. It is absolutely wretched. And just, if you think Burt Bacharach and Hal David could do no wrong, watch this movie.
Starting point is 00:34:46 Because I don't know what happened. That song that Gilbert sang is a good one, actually. I like that song, but I don't know the rest of the music. Bobby Van has a song called Question Me and Answer, which you can find them on YouTube. It's pretty dreadful. And I brought it up, I think, the last time we did bad musicals. I brought it up at the end. Because you can't have a discussion of bad musicals without bringing up Lost Horizon.
Starting point is 00:35:10 And I think the story goes, Bobby Vann. Oh, no. Fuck Lee Fulton. Oh, no. And Vann wanted to fuck Alec Guinness. He wasn't even in it. John Gielgud. John Gielgud.
Starting point is 00:35:26 Use some force. Why are you dragging Alec Guinness into it? That's what caused the problem. He was fucking John Gielgud, and while he was coming, he'd scream out, Oh, Alec Guinness! Alec Guinness! And that's what split them up. They found their own Shangri-La right there. I think you better sign off, Paul. I can't talk.
Starting point is 00:36:01 All right, you're a very sick man. And John Gielgud started screaming out, Jim Navers! Jim Navers! This has been what we consider our own personal look at bad musicals over the last few decades. Yeah. Hey, fellas, we just got a call from HR. They want a word with all of us. This one derailed quickly.
Starting point is 00:36:26 Gottfried, you're a mad genius just for the sake of the listeners who can't see in the booth each of us is sitting in his own corner i want to assure you i am weeping well this was an attempt at a bad movie musicals episode. This was an attempt at a podcast. The first part was just a warm-up. I think some things about bad musicals managed to get squeezed in between the cracks. Gil, you
Starting point is 00:36:57 want to take us out of this? Yes, this has been Gilbert and Frank's amazing colossal upset. Thank you, Paul, for all your hard work. This has been Gilbert and Frank's Amazing Colossal Obsessions. Thank you, Paul, for all your hard work. Yes, thank you. I thank you for nothing. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Starting point is 00:37:15 Colossal Obsessions.

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